The Dick Show - Episode 358 - Dick on Poop River

Episode Date: May 8, 2023

I have no plumbing in my house, Karl from "Who Are These Podcasts?" calls in, Vito funds his comic, Russia is winning, conservatives go hard into the paint, GPrime calls in about comics, a man is arrested for a headline, and advice on surviving life; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Just posting some pornography in there. Very good, guys. Very good. We're not gonna have pornography for much longer, Sean. No. No, I hope you enjoyed it while we had it. Probably not as much as I should have, but yeah, you're gonna be sorry when it's gone.

So boy, I wish I had more pornography. Mm-hmm. They finally got it. Yeah, how'd they get it? I don't know, they've got some dumb drivers license requirement for porn hub and. Oh no shit, like Utah and Louisiana now. Well, I know about, yeah, Utah. I heard about that. You heard about that one. Didn't porn hub just shut them down?

I mean, like basically the whole state because it's like, you're going to try to get us on the hook for fucking any possible thing that. I don't think so, guys. You're done. No point for you. I think I'll take it out of there. I'll take it out of there. It kills them. You know what's weird about AI?

You remember Tetris Brain? You played too much Tetris and you started seeing Tetris in your head. Well, no. You don't remember that? No, because I didn't really play games. Did you hear people talking about it? Tetris brain? Yeah, where you'd play too much Tetris

and then see Tetris head. Is that like, how Tetris brain? Is that like, Do you not know that? Is that like a major global phenomenon? Is that like beer nuts or golf balls? What is golf balls?

No. It's a final stage of beer nuts. Beer nuts? I don't know Tetris brain. Are you making the Tetris brain thing is real that I'm talking about. Yeah. Well anyway, we're golf balls. This is the last show I regret to I didn't want you to find out this way, but this will be the last show that we're doing. Why? Because you can't jerk off before it. No, because on Monday, I'm going to get an estimate from a plumber, maybe two plumbers, to see how much it's going to cost to connect my house to the city sewer

line. And I'm going to see that estimate and I'm going to kill myself. And that's going to be the end of the show. You're going to be no more show because the estimate will be so high. I'm going to count the commas and the asset. How much do you think it caused to connect to to dig up an entire house and connect it to the sewer line that it's supposed to be connected to already? What's the connected to now?

On a giant pit of of excrement that's under my house and that's been collecting for 60 years, I guess it's not connected to the fucking sewer line, which was stated in the MLS, whatever it is, when you buy the house, well, yeah, it's a nice house. It's got a sewer. Yeah, it says right there in public sewer. All right. Why would they, why would they lie about that?

How did you find out? How did you find out? How did you get away with that, right? There's some sort of regulation or check, check safety check cop check nut check sanity check well it detects whether or not the house is connected to the sewer right i mean it exists in america right you can't just say no any something is connected to the fucking sewer line we had a great right

you're here now how did you have a roof on it right yeah how did you get in roof on it, right? Yeah. Why is there a dining in here, then? And an inspector, I don't know what, to what lengths an inspector goes to, to like in a praser would never, like you would ask the homeowner, like is it, if you're, it's a rural property,

you can probably guess it's a tank. Not even that rural. No, no, this isn't that rural. I know. I can see two manholes from my front. You are. That's what I'm saying. You would never, your initial thought would be, well, of isn't that rural. I know. I can see two man's rules from my front yard. That's what I'm saying. You would never, your initial thought would be,

well, if this is on public, right? Yeah, like everybody on the streets could have to do this sewer, right? Yeah. Now, how did you find this out? My fucking cleaning lady decided to shove an avocado down the drain. How much do you think it's going to cost me?

Do you have a million? Two million bucks. I'm going to need to go. I'm going to need to look at face to get my million dollars in reparations so I can put plumbing in my fucking house. Oh, wow. So one point two million for black people in California. That's their, they get it. It's not enough. It was 2.1 million. They negotiated Larry Parker. They're not good.

Oh, yeah, Larry. You know the story. Is he a national brand? Larry H. Parker. Is he just California? You're just still alive. You know, I'm going to fucking kill myself when I see that. You know that when I see that feeling of, you have a new email from Perfect Plumbing.

I'm like, oh god. Yeah, good. And I'm gonna, I wanna say that I'm gonna do the noble thing and kill everybody else before I kill myself, but I probably won't. I'm gonna be a knifer. I'm gonna be one of these guys that just offs themself without writing any wrongs at all.

Yeah. I'm gonna, my name is Earl, my way out of this life. Rup! Are you gonna buy, I'm never gonna financially recover from this. You should buy the t-shirt. My, yeah, I'm gonna go buy the t-shirt. Why not? I'll buy 20.

Yeah, who needs this? What have I been doing? My cleaning lady decided to shove an avocado down the drain as far as I can tell. Wait, do you use the same cleaning lady that you have for one? No. I have a new one. I know.

I use the same one. You do? Yeah. Wanna? Yeah. What? Yeah. We've talked about this.

Yes. We've talked about this. On the show? Yeah. I didn't know that. How did you find her? Unless it was part, like just, maybe there's two on us. No, no, is that possible? I asked, I asked you.

Oh, you did? Yeah. Okay, that makes sense. Yeah. Well, tell her to watch out for those avocados. Yeah. So she shoves an avocado down the drain, sink, stuck up, whatever. We've always had sink problems.

And a plumber comes out and he goes, yeah, your pipes are all fucked. The pipes are, they're so old, they're cast iron, they're so old, they're swollen shut. Oh yeah. They're rust, right? Yeah. I said, what can you like de-rust and he goes, nah, you got to get new ones. Yeah.

I said, okay, de-rust is going to eat the fucking rest of it probably. He said, well, go, you know, tell me, tell me how bad it is. So he sticks his camera under the house. He's like, oh, I have bad news all All your, all of them are all cracked and fucked up. So you got to do them all or your foundation's going to be fucked. I'm like, all right, man. He's going around. And he's so wait a minute. What? I know. I know that was it ever at one time connected. It was never connected to the public. Yeah. Then he goes, I said, okay, we'll bring out your big, bring out your bigger tools. Then go back to the public. Yeah. Then he goes, I said, okay, we'll bring out your big, bring out your

bigger tools then go back to the central base, get more tools, come back out, do more stuff and then tell me how much that is. Right. A couple hours later, he goes, I got more bad news. Oh my God. Your, your house isn't connected to the sewer. I said, what? What do you mean? Yeah. What? It just goes goes into, where does it go? It's just into an abyss. Oh my God. What about the septic tank? He's not connected to that.

Oh my God. Why is it not connected to this? You're telling me they made a septic tank, connected it at one point, and then disconnected it and ran into it. And never connected it. That's what it sounds like to me. You're telling me that every single plumber who's ever come out here has missed that? Well, that it's not connected.

You're telling me the guy that I hired specifically to tell me the condition of the sewer line from my house because I wanted a second opinion to the appraisers. He missed this one glaring emission while he was checking the sewer line that the house isn't fucking connected to it at all you're telling me he missed all of these people miss all that well how deep do you have to look yes he said but that's what i mean how you know how deep you have to look uh... what what why did he for the did he feed apparently? Well, no, but I mean, he stuck a camera down,

what the sink or the access port in the back. You pop a cap off and then you stick your stuff in the, you stick the camera in there. Okay, so he was just like, where's the fucking avocado pit? Yeah. And then like, he just kept going. And it was like, He's like, well, that's not, that's not being used.

Well, can you, can you connect to that instead of, of things like, all right, well, we got to connect the sewer. You got to, first of all, you got to pay the sewer fee. And I'm like, well, that's, you know what the irony is? The city's been charging me for sewage for seven fucking years. Of course. So between public sewer on the house listing hiring the but sewage line inspector to inspect it

the city charging me a sewer fee yeah and every single guy coming out here saying yeah yeah sure we'll blast it out yeah I stick a camera in there yeah it looks pretty the it looks pretty packed but whatever we'll get it out of there they all just missed it. Wow. So that's the end of me. That'll be the end. I said, all right, so instead of he's like,

we gotta bring out a backhoe, close the street off then you gotta pay the city to connect to their sewer line. So we can't just put it back to the septic tank. He goes, well, during COVID, they changed the rule so that you can no longer, if you're within 25 feet of the sewer, you have to connect. You can know.

So I get to pay the city to connect to their sewer system that they've been charging you. That they've already been charging me for for seven years. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That I legally am required to do. You don't have to charge so. And then I have to get four cement trucks and fill up the septic tank

that it's now illegal for me to use. That apparently hasn't been used in 30 years. It's so funny how people, the concept of that you own your home or that you own your property. I've got a big hoard of the only thing I own is a giant pile of shit that's been accumulating under my house for 60 years. Oh, God, that's disgusting.

That's what I own. Yeah. Sitting right under my layer of the brand canyon. Sceptic tank. Yeah, how many drugs are in that big pile of shit like Scrooge McDuck's? Right under my layers of the brand canyon, septic tank. Yeah. How many drugs are in that big pile of shit like Scrooge McDuck's? I don't know, but man, there are some fucked up earthworms. I got veto shit down there.

Oh, I got my life coaches shit down there. Should probably move. Yes, then I have these geniuses. You might as well just sell. How am I going to do you understand the concept of how much money you lose when you sell a house? It's like, first of all, 6% off the top. Oh, yeah, I mean, because of the agent real stuff.

Yeah, for the agent's fees. Yeah, and then I have to tell them, oh, by the way, it's not connected to a sewer line. Well, I can't go. Well, yeah, public, I can't just copy and paste the house that I bought. Southridge. I know that, of course, the public sewer is not part of it. Right. Right. Right. Right. So I emailed the public sewage line inspector at publics at sewageline inspector.com. Yeah. And I said, hey, retard. Yeah. By the way, this inspection that you did where he said all these things that I have to do to fix, like to do maintenance on my sewer line, not only do those, those don't exist, those things

that you said I might need to fix. Yeah. And not only that, but I'm not connected to the sewer, and there's, if you do like a two-second search on the city sewer thing, there's no permit for my house. So you would have known it right away. Yeah. So you might want to work that into your moron, uh, your to-do list. Maybe you would have mentioned it on the top at some point in the report that it's not connected to anything. Why would he like it? Big red capital letters at the top. And maybe that would just be the entire report is not fucking connected to the sewer. Maybe that's when I said,

I'm buying this house, check it out. Maybe that's something you might auto wanted to check out. Well, you're supposed to, if you're somebody like that, you need to pull public record. You go to building and safety in the county or the city that the house is in and you ask them,

hey, is this thing connected to what? This is your parcel number, this blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I want to see every permit and they will do that and they will make copies for you. And you can do it online. That is because I do it online. The plumber said, I said, are you sure it's just jumping into an abyss that you're not wrong? No, look, you're not in any permit.

You're not permitted to connect. So, yeah, I emailed the inspector and told him politely how retarded he was. Yeah. And he, you're never going to guess. You're never going to guess. You write to me back. Oh, actually, a lot of those houses don't have permits. And I did say that there was some sort of a blockage in your, so I could see past it.

Yeah. Said the blockage was the end. Yeah. It's not a blockage. You dips. First of all, you're wrong. There's no universe in which you dips. First of all, you're wrong. There's no universe in which you have an excuse objective reality staring you in the face

you fucking idiot. You're first on the list. You're for when I get that quote. Yeah, I'm coming to you first and I will punch you in the face until there is no more face with it. Uh-huh. All right, let's start the actual show. What a disaster. Goddamn Chinese renovators. E-R-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A- How come you want to get you to get you love it? You guys are showing up as a contest. Come to your life from Mount Bunker. Deep in the heart of the city failure. I'm your host, Dick Baster, just an AK, the $20 million man.

Joining me is always a world touring L.A. based comedian, Sean the audio engineer. Hello, Dick. How you doing? Pretty good. Better than me. Seems like it. Always better than me.

Look at this, look at this shit. This fat bitch removed, removed my name from a joke of mine. Can you believe this? Cry to Idubs is wife. Look at this, what she did here. I called her fat and she took my name off of it. I said, you guys are comedians about their boxing thing. Putting on a clown show.

You're not professional boxers with boilerplate contracts, quote, how do you not understand that? You think boxing leagues are run by a fat cam girl? Yeah. I was gonna put horror, but they banned you for saying that sometimes. So look at this, she put a fucking smiley face over my name and blanked my whole name out and lulled it. What the fuck is this? That's my name, you bitch.

Oh, fucking take my knowledge. Tell it to me. It's the actual own. Yeah. Musicians are getting sued left and right for accidentally ripping off riffs and you're stealing my whole joke. This is stolen valor.

Yeah. You stole mine. Stolen valor. Everyone needs to know who hurt you. It was me. Right. By pointing out how fat you are and you are fat. They're gonna ban you for saying fat.

Fat or not? Look at this. Look at this. Pudge. Pregnant with donuts. What a strange looking group on the, yeah, no shit. You know, the worst part of the toilet story? It's not that I live on a, you lost an office.

I lost the avocado. It's not that I live on a... You lost an off on a caro? I lost the avocado. It's not that I live on a pot, a 60 year pile of shit. So good. There's shit in there that's from discontinued products. Oh, for sure. You know? And never coming back.

Bugles, I do those still exist? Bugles. Peaks. What were the things with like a pizza in the middle, like a goo in the middle. A roll, like a pretzel roll, a goo in the middle, a pizza goo. Oh my gosh.

Those were good. I never had one, but I can totally, they're like, they're cylinders. Yes. What the hell were they? Tollos, something tumbles. I'm thinking like, Totino's were the pizza rolls. Not Totino's. What? What were they? Tollos? Something tumblos? I'm thinking like, Totino's were the pizza rolls.

Not Totino's. Uh, what? God, is it? Somebody helped me with that. The worst part was, when I get this bad news, bad news after bad news. Combo's, yes. There's combos,

there's half-chute up combos and they're somewhere. Geez. Go spilunking through there. The worst part is, when I found this bad and terrible horrible news, the guy said, I said, well, what's it going to cost? And he goes, well, we're going to need a couple days to give you an S. We're going to need a team full of, yeah, right crunching numbers to let's see. And great. Let's see, it's seven years of fines for not being connected to. Yeah. And I thought, well, do I even want to ask the city

for my money back? Or are they gonna like start finding me for back years of fine of dumping illegal shit under my house? Right. Well, you shit twice a day. So that's seven times, 300 times two, $40 a ticket.

You owe us $3 million. Yeah, they're gonna make me. Now, kill those or two? There you go. The worst part was when he says, when he says to me, yeah, we'll get you an estimate, but it's not going to be pretty. I said, okay. My girlfriend comes home and she goes, wow, you sound like you've had a rough day.

Yeah, because I told her all about it. Wow, you know what we should do. Let's stay in tonight and order some sushi. Like, honey, do not cap a missile, you're noting like you already know why that's annoying. The most expensive, you picked one that's guaranteed 120 bucks. Yeah, oh, I know.

Oh, that sounds, oh, that's gonna, that's gonna really find, you're never gonna financially recover from that. Let's order some sushi. Yeah. I don't know what it's a nice for dinner. How about that? Let's eat some grass.

Yeah. Let's intermittent fasting. Intermittent fasting starts today. For like 72 hours. Oh, we. So I'm back in the black. Yeah, yeah. Till Bitcoin's over a million dollars of coin. There you go.

Um. How about that? How about that? How about that? Um, yeah. You see that guy that got murdered on the subway? No. Killed.

You didn't see that? Oh, no wait, I think I read about it. It's amazing. A homeless guy finally had to get killed for things. Homeless people are doing all the time. Oh no, I didn't hear it. No, I was shocked. Where?

Where? New York. New York. A homeless guy got choked out by a dude, by a Marine, by a guy. Oh, and it cracked for acting homeless, and then he died. And then he died. So then what are they gonna do? Probably throw the normal person in jail

because in fantasy land, where apparently 90% of people now live, when a guy, when a normal guy is strangling a homeless person and being held down by multiple people, their first thought is, wow, I when a normal guy is strangling a homeless person and being held down by multiple people, their first thought is, wow, I guess that normal guy just started strangling a homeless man for no reason. Not the other fantastical scenario, which is, wow, I bet that homeless guy was acting homeless and then got strangled for being fucking crazy because like 50% of the time

Interacting with the homeless they do something that won't that justifies you killing them. Yeah, whether it's in your car running at you crazy Mental illness there doesn't matter Majority are are fucked up in the head they commit crimes all the time all this said there's like 25 violent crimes a day in LA committed by the homeless. Well, I can't fucking believe one of them got put into a chokehold and died. What a fucking shocker that guy must have got bad news at work and just decided for no reason to find a homeless person and strangle them

until they were dead. That must be what happened. Cause I'm too fucking dumb, cause I live in a cave and I've never encountered a homeless person on the street. That's why I immediately think that. Wow, some guys getting held down by multiple people and choked out. Gosh, those multiple people must have just decided to snap. Well, that's until a guy for no reason, you fucking retards.

That bolsters the case more, is that, clearly a bunch of people felt the need to help. And a black guy was among the people holding the black homeless guy down who was acting homeless. Fucking mind-bottling. He deserved to live. Well, then he shouldn't have been acting so homeless. Well, you know, I mean, I know how,

we all know how they are. I mean, there's crazy. No, crazy. Crazy, like that. Constantly, pretty crazy. Yeah, somebody says to me, what do you do to each other? I mean, what's the judgment,

each other? That's his free speech, right? To say, you don't deserve to die for exercising your free speech. Man, you can't come up to somebody and say, man, what did he say? Well, I mean, what was the, oh yeah, I got, they entered me. What they, they, somebody who was there, who said he

was there. I mean, I thought was like he was getting physically violent. Well, that's the only thing I can imagine where you'd have to restrain somebody. Some buystanders said about it. The video shows the restrap hangers of doing the 30 year old man after witness Juan Alberto Vasquez says he got on the northbound F train and began acting aggressively threatening riders, law enforcement okay dad then I'm homeless I'm gonna fuck you up.

Can someone kill this guy? Yeah I mean he's already said he's gonna fuck me up. What do I have to do? What's like until I'm getting beat right? But for a fact, oh gosh I'm just gonna stare at the ground like it's my first day in prison right. I don't even know what I'm doing on this. I don't even know what I'm getting beat right? Exactly. Oh gosh, I'm just gonna stare at the ground. Like it's my first day in prison. Right. I don't even know what I'm doing on this. I don't even know what I'm doing here.

Oh God, that indestructible homeless man's here. Oh boy. No, I hope he doesn't see me and make eye contact with me because I can't just shoot him for some reason for threatening me. I mean, there is anybody else. There is such a thing, and I'm probably using it wrong, but the war that comes to mind is like imminent threat. Yeah. You know, like I mean, you tell you're already homeless. You're a threat. I mean, you better not fuck around

it all. And then you start talking like you're going to get violent. You do something about this. So I'm going to shoot him. So I mean, that's, you're not the government. You're not supposed to wait till he whips out a knife and charges you. Yeah. Cop can't come in and shoot somebody for being crazy, but you definitely can. I mean, what did he say? Well, he said he was going to feel I fucking shot him. Oh, okay. Yeah.

Yeah. Why would he say he's going to fuck me up? Why would he say he's going to fuck you up? I assumed he was going to fuck me up. Oh, yeah. That's reasonable. I don't, yeah. I mean, I believed him. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Oh, it totally reasonable assumption about what happened, but every retard somehow

Goes into the other one. Well, I got it. Can't believe that happened. How? How can you not believe that happened? Yeah, yeah Why not yeah, what's wrong with you? What's so fantastic about that scenario? Here's what the guys say. knowledge of the case confirm his account saying according to a witness the man began shall take quote, I want food. I'm not taking no for an answer. I'm not taking no for an answer. Survey says I'm going to scream something and I'll get him killed. I won't take no for an answer. Ding ding ding. I'm ready to go back. What to prison. Oh, yeah, jail. Oh, well, I got bad news for you, ding. I'm ready to go back to prison. I'm ready to go back to jail. Oh, well, I got bad news for you, buddy.

You're going to hell. Now I heard anyone on this train. Okay. Yeah. Are you serious? I'll hurt anybody here. Oh, they killed that guy? Yeah.

Wow. I wonder what, I wonder what did it? A white supremacy demon must have flown in to the black the black guy that was restraining him somehow. Yeah. God fucking dumb. Totally fucking dumb. There was a there was a subway protest too. Check this out. Really? I think it is. There was a subway protest too, check this out. Really? I think it is.

Yeah. Are you yet again triggered by this incident? Yeah, all the fat people, subway protest, needs, people with no job. It's all the people who don't take the subway. I mean, that's what I said about the whole thing. Like if you've ever had to regularly take the subway, then your first thought when this happened was fucking awesome. I wish that had happened on every subway ride I'd ever taken my fucking life. Yeah, right. Actually, they're standing

on the tracks. Oh, my God. Now, you know, people are training or nervous about it. You know, they're like, Oh, shit. I mean, know, like, oh shit, I mean, I, yeah, look at, first of all, why are these people in the yellow? That's a no go, but all of these idiots are standing on the train tracks of the subway. I guess these people have never like texted while they're driving before. Like that's what I'm,

if I'm standing on subway tracks, I guess the subway stop. Are they chanting no justice, no peace? Yeah. Can't be killing homeless. You can't be killing homeless people that are acting crazy. Are you, what would happen to society? Oh, I don't know.

I mean, they're clearly, clearly. It would be a mess. Mm. Oh, yeah. What could we do to just, you know, convince the subway driver to drive through? I drive through. To pass out onto the, yeah. Come on. Oh, man. Oh, I'm having a heart attack. Oh, yeah. Oh, I don't know.

I thought I was having a heart attack. I thought I was having a heart attack. Oh, yeah. Oh, I don't know. I thought I was having a heart attack. I thought I was having a heart attack. I'm so worried about that guy. Yeah. This homeless guy on the subway distracted me. Right. So I forgot, I didn't know that the people there and I just stopped like normal.

Right. This is fucking a homeless guy, I was in. I had to choke out of home. Is it ironic? Yeah, that would be his press statement. That would be a good one. Jesus. Oh, people are still arguing about child support in this day and age. Do you believe that? I statement that would be a good one. Jesus.

People are still arguing about child support in this day and age. Can you believe that? Yeah. Thought we settled that one. Yeah. I guess not. Totally.

I guess not. I guess as long as there's kids in divorce, we're gonna have, we're gonna have to pay their fair share. Yeah. What are these men, these deadbeats? Well, it's to help the kids. That's why when you can't pay child support. It's right of the kid. Yeah. That's why when you can't pay child support, we arrest you and put you in jail. Right. So you can help the kid. Yeah. Yeah. That's odd. Yeah.

How come there's tax on the child support then? Well, yeah, sure. We got to take a little, you know, of course, not free to help kids. But we just know that's all the chance of, you know, child support. How come it goes, how come the backpack goes to you first? How come the fees go to you first and not the kid? Well, how come it's a percentage of what I make then? Like, how does it, why does that could get more help than that?

Well, you tell me deadbeat. Yeah. All right. Yeah. Cool system. It's like all the others. Yeah, Yeah. Cool system. Like all the others. Yeah. It's just like all the others. Here's, uh, here's some good news. Women in women in firefighting, somebody sent me this one. Yeah. The diverse firefighter diversity

Women today set a set a controlled burn in Banff The National Park. Yeah, they're all like they're all talking about how great it is to have women fire fighters So they had an all women firefighting thing where they were setting a controlled burn in Banff Canada yeah And that's that right that's in British Columbia. I got a little out of control. Yeah. Oh, I guess they messed it up. Oh, carried out a prescribed fire in compound meta is an unexpected shift in the wind direction and speed. The fire escaped the pre determined, I guess it's just an unfortunate coincidence that all the women were how much how much how much how much was burned. I don't know. I think speed, the fire escaped, the predetermined, I guess it's just an unfortunate coincidence

that all the women were there. How much, how much, how much was burned? I don't know, I think it's still going. Today, we're also recognizing the contributions of women who work in wildfire. Women are still underrepresented in the firefighting community. Well, that's, maybe try again in a couple years when people forget about this one on international women's day Purchase of the purpose of the burn was

blah blah blah blah. Jesus Banging up job better luck next time ladies better luck next time. Um, let me see Carl's here He wanted oh, yeah, I'd call in my mouse doesn't work great Yeah, I have to call in my mouse, doesn't work. Great. Yeah. Do you know the guy, Coach Redpill? Does that now, does that name sound familiar to you? No.

No. He got arrested in Ukraine. He was the streamer who got arrested in Ukraine. You're just like saying shit that I say about like the war. Oh, I'm sure it's like that Ukraine is destroyed basically. Like all the men are getting killed, all the people left. Like they're saying shit in Ukraine. Like we have to bring migrants in to replace the, to replace the manpower we lost. Is that right? It's like, yeah, you guys like,

your country got totally destroyed from yourselves. All you had to do was leave those, let Russia take those areas. Well, I mean, it wasn't Russia. What do you want? It was, I mean, it was a sovereign border. Well, yeah, but I mean, Russia's not the good guy in this. Well, I know there's that weird fucking narrative from the right because people were like Trumps in Russia's pocket. No, Russia, the good guys.

I'm not saying good. I'm saying the choice was either give those two up or have your entire country destroyed. Well, they made a choice. Yeah. Yeah. It's not like Russia's unscathed from it either in both manpower and the world going like,

yeah, we're not gonna do anything with you. None of Russia's cities got bombed. Right. So just a bunch of dickheads that wanted to go play army got killed. Oh no. Yeah, well, I'm real sorry we lost all those guys. Let's put it in. They're putting a gun to anybody's head.

Is it get off the bus, come back here and get killed for Zelensky? They made a choice that most countries would make. I've done one. I mean, that's a dumb choice. Wouldn't, wouldn't we, you know, I fucking hope? What a nut? That's how the Civil War happened. That was a horrible choice.

What about Mexico? What if they, if they take some of the Southwest back or just say, hey, keep it. They already did. Look around. We live in a fucking barrio. Mexico to Shay. Mexico did take it. Um, um, car, as Carl come in. Yeah, there he is. Oh, Mexican to Shay Mexican ticket.

Car as Carl coming. Yeah, there he is. There he is. Let's see. Hey, Carl, what's up? Did you hear me? I can't hear him. I think I muted this tab. No.

Mut. Unmute tab. About now. Hey, what's happening? What's happening? Carl, what are you think? Are you, are you super jazzed on Russia? Or do you merely think they're the good guys? What's your opinion on? Sean is trying to. Yeah. I put it out the other day to go up on it to a mind that I'm like, you know, a lot of the Ukrainians are Nazis. And he goes, how's

that different than the US of military? I was like, all right, good boy. Got me there. Sean is saying that if Mexico invaded the US and tried to take Arizona, that he'd want to go to war with them. Oh, not me. Oh, you wouldn't. No, the country. Oh, the country. On the outside the country. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, how I'm saying is, well, I'm saying it was a dumb idea. But, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but,. Yeah, it just seems dumb to go, you know what, we're gonna find it to the every last man. Like, no, that's literal for you guys. You're gonna fight till everyone's dead. You don't have that many people, you don't have that many guys.

You're not that big, they're big. We're not gonna nupe them, so fuck you. Right. NATO's not a common. I'm sure, do you know what country, more refugees have left Ukraine to go to than any other country? Was it here?

Russia. Oh, right. I don't know that. I think people understand is that a lot of these people in Eastern Ukraine speak Russian. Oh, I know. They are part of the union. Of course, it's those Russians. Well, when Russia came to their way, hey, come on in.

I'm Russian too. Yeah. Well, you know my cousin, right? Well, they all speak Russian. I mean, they all speak Russian. Yeah, because they were alive before all speak Russian. I mean, they all speak Russian. Yeah, because they were alive before during the US, they were alive. They were alive.

When it was one country. Well, there's, but I mean, yeah, it was all, when it was in the Soviet Union, everybody spoke Russian. I mean, it was all there. I know there were, there were native languages. They were Russian. Like, oh, we're not anymore. We hate those guys.

So what do you mean you hate those guys? Anyway, Carl has gone. It's coming good, buddy. I want to thank you for putting in, so you were promoting the show on Patreon. You said, bunch of people calling in. Wow. And I thought, wow, I'm part of a bunch of people call again. We just did a live show together in Philadelphia. And now I'm just one of the bunch of people call again. Wow. I got a lot of exciting. bunch of people called like, wow. I love it.

I already got a while. You got a while. Carl, I don't want to type that much in the morning, all right? I'm trying to, I have a lot of problems, health issues and such. So what I thought we could do today, Dick. Yeah. We haven't really done like a post live show meeting. Okay.

To discuss what worked, what didn't work. Okay. I thought it'd be fun to do that live on this show today. Yes, I like that post live show meeting. Okay. Did it discuss what worked, what didn't work. I thought it'd be fun to do that live on the show today. Yes, I like that. I like that. So I want to start with this question. I want to start with this question to you, Dick. What did I do wrong? I want to know what I did wrong for the live show.

Um, did you, did I show you Carl's itinerary? No. But he planned Carl had like a minute by minute itinerary. He had two itineraries where I'm used to having like an index card that I spilled on before the show. Yeah. Carl had a sub itinerary with the run of the show and then an additional addendum with like, because I mean, it's all bits. Like it's all like clips and stuff and bits like that. I don't think you did anything wrong. I think the, I think the venue fucked us on the no beer for the meat and greet, which was fun. I was teasing you, but that, but that, it

was fun and they fucked up the time on it too. Yeah, Dick, what was that with that? So the meat and greet was 530 to 630 and then doors at 630 and the show was at 8 and I thought when I saw that originally I thought, well people are going to order food, there's a restaurant. Yeah. There's no food. He's just coming and just waiting out a half and just drake for an hour and a half.

What was the point of that? But they couldn't drink because there was no, the bar was open. The most annoying fucking thing when you're waiting for a bar to open and the bar back is just sitting there like dumping out trays and organizing pens and ice buckets, you're like, you got fucking 60 people here of fraud. That was the bartender. He could have opened up and started pouring drinks for people. And that was funny too, because I don't think you were there.

I think you got there right after that. But I was talking to the guy who was one of the show and he was great. He was awesome. Yeah. And I look at him and I go, hey, is the bar going to be open for the meat and green? He goes, huh. Yeah. I'm not sure about that. You're not sure about that. Oh, we've got multiple people here who own bars. Just let them go in the back and start serving drinks. They're not I do it. So I felt like a real asshole walking around with backstage beers It's like when the fuck is it bar because you're gonna you need your beer You knew who was in the show because we were all drinking beers

During this mean green and no one else just stand there with I don't know their poster the right Real men of the people yeah, with, I don't know, their poster, their hand or something. Real men of the people. Yeah. I, I, I felt like an asshole. Whatever. I felt bad. I did feel bad.

Um, so I just, I just, oh yeah, go ahead. The other note that I have, so I love playing these places that are like music venues. So when you did our show in Chicago, that was a cool venue. It was like a like a music club. And we've done a few of them like that. The problem is Detroit was a perfect example. We play this really cool club, music club in Detroit, over 300 people there. But the bar is inside the venue because when there's a music show going on, it doesn't

matter how loud people are yelling at the bar. But when there's a comedy show going on, if everyone huddles around the bar and yells at each other, it's very distracting. Yeah, that happened to us. Yeah. Yeah, I think we can probably cut down your planning, your plan segments to one. Just because there's so many funny, there's so many funny people there. I just generally like them to interact. And it is kind of different to have like clips versus like, because I mean, you're the one who knows how to react to clips and all of us kind of don't. Yeah. Well, that's not true because it was a, it was a Dick show WTP crossover and those shows are amazing that we do together. Yes. So that's what I was going for.

But of course Sean wasn't there. So you ruined it. Sean did. I know. I know. I thought it was going to work out and then it didn't. No, but honestly, my note for myself, Dick, was I over prepared for that show because we're trying to fill three hours.

We're trying to fill three hours. And the funniest thing is that so you know, you do your thing and I do who are these podcasts then we did a biggest creep in the universe crossover and then we did a WTPS crossover. They were going to do biggest problem audience interaction thing and I look over at you. So we were doing our crossover show WTPS and I had a whole Patrick Michael segment ready to go and I look over you and like, you know, we're going to do right now and you go biggest problem. Yeah. You're right. Because this is going way too high. Yeah. Well, it's the plan is good. But then like, man, the musk, it, man, he muskets does a whole Akuna Matata means no end words. And I'm like, well, that fucked up our whole plan. Now I have to talk about that for 10 minutes. Like Carl, this isn't, we got a big problem now.

Like the whole show's thrown off, because Mani's song Akuna Matata with, it means no end words. And then Vito told that guy, he was gonna kill his family, that Heckler. Yeah, that was great, by the way. He's shut down the Heckler pretty quickly with that. Because guys, listen, I love everyone who comes out

to our live shows and I love doing shows with Derek, you know, I've done his show before he's done my show for this is us combined. But honestly, you do not add to a standup show by yelling at the standup. Trust me on that. Shut the fuck off. You're not one of the guys that you have nothing prepared. Shut the fuck up. But now, uh, now I want to see it. Now I want the heckling. So the deal is family. Well, so Vito will yell yell at them. Yeah. Now it's like a tradition. This is just a current you get to. I was one of the things I wanted to ask you about was like, I don't get people to like actually settle down and watch the show with

the future. No, I can see that's never, yeah, it's never going to happen. All right. You got to turn them on each other somehow. I got a, you got to get them to attack one another instead of going after us. That's the key, that's the key to a live show. At least you and I can agree that Vito fucked up the entire merch table, right? I know you've already addressed this, but what the fuck? Yeah. If it's with his, my wife wife supremacist looking t-shirts. Yeah, with his KKK shirts.

My wife gets there an hour before the meet and greet. And she's setting up all of our merchandise. She's putting the prices on everything. She's hanging up shirts behind us. You're the whole thing. And then of course, 80s girls shows up. And so they're sitting all the stuff up and they got it all figured out. And then like a fucking tornado.

Like a fat guy in the airplane, Vito just comes in and spills all over the rest of everybody's stuff. Bash is everything out of the way so he can start drawing on shitty hands under Oh, that's the one. Yeah, we've already made all the money for his comic, though. Good for him. Did you see that? Yeah. We funded his super killer comment. Really?

Yeah. What did he need? He had the goal set at $10,000. Now, do you think your sewer thing will be over under? I know. I know. I think it'll be $60,000 or seven. Well, you know what the worst part about it is too.

If they would have told me that it wasn't connected to the sewer, I could have got more money on the loan at like 2%. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And built it down. So now I'm like, well, what am I going to take a 6% fucking loan on? Yeah. Right. Right.

On something I'm just going just gonna enjoy every day. It's functioning sewer. Yeah. Yeah, I forget what I was saying. We got to do another one, Carl. I felt so bad because you were doing so much prep work in the morning. And I was trying to gently say, I don't think you need to do, I mean, I like it all, but I just think that's too much.

You don't have to work this hard. Yeah, I like it all, but I just think that's too much. Like, you don't have to work this hard. Yeah, I know. Dick and I sat down at one point. You know, I pulled them aside and I go, all right. Here's my agenda. Here's what I think is going to happen. I'm showing them in like 20 minute increments. And then you're going to do your power price thing.

I'm going to come and do this. And then, you know, I'm showing it to him. And Dick, you know, I like Dick because he wants more chaos. He doesn't want the structure to happen. So you're sitting there going, yeah, okay, no, that's, that sounds good. That sounds fine. I'm like, I know for a fact that you do not want it to be this rigid. But that's the way we do WTP.

Like there's a lot of prep involved. So there's a lot of segments and bits and things that we do. And so I think in the future, we can find a happy medium. I think it was great. I think it's great. Everyone advocates. Yes. Yes. As long as no one says that exactly. Well, so I did the show in Tampa. That was my first experience with with the live podcast experience. And that was, you know, just a Dick show that I happen to go to. And the audience is all yelling at us. We're yelling at them and it's just chaos the whole time. So then dick came to Chicago and was part

of the Who Are These Podcast Live Show. And he was making fun of me for my tinary there. And then I remember he came on the dick show afterwards and he goes, Sean, to the minute. They did it all right, right to the minute. It was great. Yeah, we had it all figured out. And it was great. So my whole thing is like We had it all figured out and it was great.

So my whole thing is like, I want people to quiet down and pay attention to the show. Your whole thing is we're going to yell at each other for four hours straight. Yeah. So we do have to fight some kind of compromise. I think it actually would work. If we do it again, I think it would be the way we had it was good. If you have one, if we go like back and forth, like we do the stupid PowerPoint, then audio clips and then like more chaotic, like biggest problem style stuff

where people, I mean, that is literally what we did, but you wouldn't know that because I don't think you're right through the itinerary, but yeah, that is what we did. Yeah, yeah. All right, Carl. Fuck it. You were talking about, you were talking about a few of us coming here. By the way, before, oh, Vita's comic. Yeah, I, all right, Carl. You were talking about my views, by the way, before. Oh, Vita's comic. Yeah, just fun that it.

So now he's like, you can just tell, dealing with him, that he's all up his out. He's like, oh, yeah, well, you know, Mr. Vita, I'm funded comic creator over here. Right. You know, living with him after this. So I will say this. So, you know, I sent out to everybody. I texted out to everyone who's on the show. Here's the segments here, the timing who's involved in each segment. Yeah.

Nobody read it. No, Nick McCabe did not read it. Wicker Cade, it couldn't be bothered with that. He's alone. What do you expect? He's not reading. It's fine. But he pissed off Vity, which was really funny because I heard about this.

Yeah. But he pissed off Vity, which was really funny because I heard about this. Yeah, so we did as the crossover show we talked about fat lip that that chick Ash who's in fit of fat. Yeah. And we had some fun videos and some of her podcast clips to talk about. And Vinnie had actually listened to the podcast and he loves the mic on the magic. And so he tried to sit down and they're like, no, I'm just going to stay here. And Vinnie was so annoyed. And I think I get it from Vinnie's perspective.

And he's like, I listened to this shitty ass podcast. Yeah. Just to be able to talk about it. I mean, well, he's got it just like we're everybody who's coming from my show just thinks it's a free for all. Yeah. So he's got to say, oh, you know, I actually prepared for this. So I get the fuck out of all. Yeah. So he's got to say, you know, I actually prepared for this. Get the fuck out of here.

Yeah. Well, it's fine. I hope he's not still pissed. I hope he's not still pissed. Everyone I talked to really enjoyed themselves. Of course, people emailed me until they had to leave because it was too noisy. But everyone I talked to was a show. Really enjoyed themselves at a good time.

Yeah. Yeah, me too. Now, we have, we have one of these, Carl. Yeah. From Ron. Check it out. Chainmail thing. Oh, yeah.

Cool. Mine is in the, it looks like a cool, like logo. Yeah, that's awesome. For Stuttering John, she even put a cockroach on it for me. Yeah, the Roger's cool. Um, what were you saying about, when's the, when's the live show going up? When's the video going up? Okay, I wanted to ask about that.

So Riley edited the whole video. Oh, have you seen that yet? No, let's the live show going up? When's the video going up? Okay, I wanted to ask about that. So Riley edited the whole video. Oh, have you seen that yet? No, let's put it up. All right, so here's the deal. I have, I have a pretty souped up computer that I use for gaming for like VR. So I have this thing built in the process. You do this to start with that? Nope, but I haven't even had the processor in the video card.

No, you know why I don't. Why? Because when you're in VR, you. No, you know why I don't. Why? Because when you're in VR, you don't know what's going on around you. And I just know my mother-in-law's gonna stop over on expected. And I would be screaming some ridiculous shit with my dick in my hands. She's walking in the door. You got to get you and your wife have to do it. So we've done

I'll put it on fire up some VR and then I cast it to the TV Yeah, this might be too much information. Yeah, so we're having sex and I'm in VR VR porn on it told me Tanaka on it and she can see what's happening on the screen It's amazing. Sean, she can see what's actually happening. Yeah, she can see what's happening. She's got the bus to both worlds. I look retarded with the helmet on my. It's a very elaborate way to have to have sex, but I highly recommend it. Well, yeah, I would do it. Anyway, the point is that I have a pretty nice computer built for that sort of thing. Yeah. And it could not even play this video. It's 25 gigs. There's no compression whatsoever. So I said it's a video to see if he could make sense of it and press a

dial so that we can actually say it to me. I can do it. I have that technology. But but yeah, right in between my VR porn. Yeah, go ahead. So I barely edited the entire show. He took out Vinnie stand up because Vinnie's a prima d'oeuvre. But, oh, you know, Vinnie wanted to stand up out. Why? Well, he's got to protect his stuff, I guess. Oh, wow. This isn't the first time.

Stealing jokes or he's worried about the burning material. Burning material. Yeah, that's real. Yeah, stand up guys, you're real. Yeah, seeing him guys who are real, I guess rightly, rightly, I mean, they know, they would know. I don't know. If everybody already knows the jokes and, you know, I mean, I know I never retell jokes.

Right. Well, video's no Louis CK. He's not ready to new hour every year. So, he wants, well, the material is like, is he kind of, I get it. I get it. Okay, well, that's cool.

As long as that video's out there, we'll get it up as soon as we can. And, you it. I get it. Okay. Well, that's cool. That video's out there. We'll get it up as soon as we can. And, you know, I'll see what's going on. I'll definitely add you to it so you can check it out. Yeah. Share it with me. I'll bounce it today.

I'm sure Riley's screaming at me in the discord right now. You're not supposed to compress it. All right. I mean, I know. I'm glad you did what you did. Thank you. Right. You need to know. You need to know. No one can watch it. It's amazing know I'm glad you do what you did. Thank you. I'm able to watch it. You nailed it.

No one can watch it. It's amazing. I'm compressed. It's beautiful. No one could see it. Great. 25 gig file. And I have a fiber in my house.

And it took me like an hour to download this fucking thing. Oh my God. And a fiber is that. It's pretty fast. All right. Anything else going on? Yeah, dude, can I just tell you a quick story? Yes, go for it. This morning I went to church. Once the last time you went to church, Dick or job for a wedding for my sister's wedding.

Oh, no, that wasn't a change. I'm like a Sunday morning like mask kind of thing. I haven't been since I was a child. The manager said I was no longer doing this. Right. I spent my entire childhood trying to get out of that shit. I grew up atheist. So I don't know anything about church and I had to spend the wheel consequences on the creep off. And my consequence was to attend church. So what did you think? And friend of mine. Well, so I got a friend of mine to go with me. And she's also, I think, atheists are agnostic. And so we go to this mega church and it looked like a movie theater. This building is enormous.

Yeah. And we go in and it's one of these ones where there's lights and fog machine and like state of the art, technology, there's this video board. So I have a lot of money plugged into an acoustic guitar. They have a lot of money. I don't know. It's $50 million of guitar. They have a lot of money. I know.

50 million dollars of audio equipment plugged into a PowerPoint and I know I'm not gonna acoustic guitar nail this. There was a full band stage. The drummer thought he was like some kind of like metal band is like he was straight like. And dude, so we get there and everyone's standing up and there's lights and the bands playing and they're doing like Latin music and it's half of Spanish. And it's like, it's really impressive.

I mean, some of the singing was pitchy, but it's very impressive. Pitchy don't. And then, after all that, so you watch like 15, 20 minutes of this band playing and everyone's singing a log and they're all feeling it and the Lord is there with us. And I found Jesus. And then this pastor, Josh comes out. It's 35-year-old guy. Pastor Josh.

Yeah, Josh comes out and God damned as he loved to hear himself talk. So yeah, he runs the light by like 20, 25 minutes. That's a comedy term, but basically he was on stage way longer than it's supposed to be. And so he's just going on and on. And it's funny because you could watch the band comes back on it performs afterwards. So you can see like first the piano player gets up and he's like fooling around back there getting ready. And then the guitarist is up there, two of them is guitar. They're trying to play him off. Yeah. Yeah. They're hitting it.

They're hitting it. They're hitting it. You're losing the crowd. God. Come on. They want some music. Yeah. Anyway, it was, it was pretty incredible.

I was, first riveted and bored out of my mind. I don't know what this guy was talking about. That's what, that's the same thing happened. So, um, my sister had to go to pretend to go to church to get her kid baptized, which she only did because my grandma bought like insisted a panic church. That's brutal. So we went to, I mean, I went to church with her as a laugh.

Like they have to pretend to go to church to get the kid baptized, right? Like that's kind of the unspoken deal or spoken. It's not that you get to grandma. Yeah. And we walked out of there and her husband was, her husband was kind of, he's very white. So he's like, yeah, I kind of like that. I don't know why.

I was like, yeah, because you're white. White people just love church for some reason. And he's like, yeah, that was pretty good. And my sister goes, at no point could I understand what the fuck the story was that the priest was talking about. It was this meandering story of absolutely nothing like a like a schizophrenic just rambling on and on about people that had no, it was like a woman's story, but told by an old man.

Yeah. Well, this guy was telling a story from the Old Testament and a very famous story, you know, the Jews were enslaved in Egypt and the scabies. Can't escape it. You can't fuck with that. Even when you're in church, 400 years and then Moses parts the Red Sea and he's explaining this is if this is like a real thing that happened, he's like, and by the way, if you were there, you'd remember it. That's a crazy thing to watch the Red Sea get part of that.

I'm like, I think it's about a four. I'm going to go down. But then he's going out and out about like this historical stuff from the Bible and who the King Solomon was and all this stuff. And he's losing the crowd. And then like 20 minutes into what he goes. And then Jesus. There was like, whoa, Jesus, like you got.

He's hurting that guy. You got to go right into the hits. Jesus. The hit. 11. Whoa. Play the hits. How about a football? Monday night football.

Everybody, you got it. Yep. It's quite a racket day of going in the church. I hope Ralph becomes, I genuinely hope he becomes a Baptist minister. Now that he's not doing, he's not drinking or doing any drugs, not even weed anymore. Really? After his, after his activities at my house, he says he's done. He's going to AA.

I mean, I hope that he does. I really hope that he does, but I also hope that he becomes like a flat out Baptist, Southern Christian minister. Yeah. Oh, man, Jesus is in that. He'd be entertaining. And it's like, I think it's the same kind of fix as drugs, like praising Jesus. But that's a very, very common trade.

That's why I'm hoping for it. So man, come on, man, you fucking owe me. God, after all the shit you've given me, just give me this, make Ralph's third act of Braptist Minister, please. I don't think that's a big ask. It's not, I don't ask for a lot. No, not really, but you, you know. You fucking owe me, God, anyway.

Carl, you gonna plug your stuff? Yeah, you get to find me too. Yeah, do you find me too? Yeah, do you find me too? Yeah, do you find me too? Yeah, do you find me too?. Yeah, you're the prime speaker. Is our website. I host Who Are These Podcasts twice a week. You can get that wherever you listen to podcasts. Also, I'm doing this show called Who Are These Socials?

With my buddy, Blind Mike Geary. That is Thursdays at six o'clock, Eastern, The Who Are These Podcasts YouTube channel, also available as a podcast. And you know how I feel about social media because I came on the biggest problem. And I talked about how much I hate social media. So I do a whole podcast about social media now. And basically you watch, like whatever Eric Baldwin is doing on Instagram and Julia Fox is doing at Dick doc. And that's that. That's cool.

That's cool. Yeah. Speaking of social media, did you see that I dubbed his wife posted my making fun of her for being fat, but she it's my, speaking of social media, did you see that, uh, Idubs is wife, uh, uh, posted my making fun of her for being fat, but she blocked out my name. I saw that. Isn't that horrible what you did to me? Oh, you want is the credit. Yeah.

That's all you want. I heard your feelings. Let everyone know who did it. Guys, me, he isn't a ghost writer. I write, he's, he said, he said it for the arch. He's in it for the glory. I honestly think that she removed my name because it makes her look bad because they'd be like,

oh, no, that guy, that guy always has fat chicks, peg that that he definitely know. Like I think she removed my name because it gives credibility to the insult, which pisses me off more. He's like, look at these anonymous trolls. Like, I'm fuck an anonymous bitch? Yeah. It's the last thing I should be.

Yeah. You tell them. Say my name. I deserve to be as famous as Jesus in Carl's Church. I really want to go to a black church. Yeah, you know, I thought about doing that, but I'm already intimidated by the whole experience together with this one was pretty much happening.

I don't want to be scared by black people too. What? Well, I just, I feel like intimidated by the whole experience together. This one was pretty much happening. I want to be scared by black people too. What? Well, I just, I feel like I wouldn't be welcome there. I mean, it's that house of God. Why would you not be welcome? You'd probably be welcome. You think? You'd probably be extra welcome.

You think so? Yeah. Yeah, you think the white guy can drum. Well, you know what I did though today. I'm proud of this. So I gave a donation when the donation thing went around and they give you like little, that's how they get you.

That's how they get you. And then you have to put in like your name and your email address and your phone number. So I did put in Vinnie Paulino. I gave him his real cell phone number and his real email address. Oh, that's fucked up. That's fucked up.

Oh, maybe they're gonna follow up from the church. Oh, they're gonna come to this door. We should go to a black church, don't you think? Sure. You wanna go to a black church down here? Yeah, let's do it. We do black phase. I don't know about that.

I don't want them to be like to treat us like outsiders though. Yeah. So we better, I'll do black phase and then you just go as you and we'll see who has a more authentic experience. Okay. Okay, we'll compare experiences has a more authentic experience. Okay. Okay. We'll compare experiences. Okay.

All right, Carl. Thank you for calling me. All right, guys. See you, Carl. Yeah, thanks for having me. Have fun. Okay, let's talk to G Prime. Is he here?

G Prime. There he is. George. George. I give him a minute. I go back and forth, but you know, he could be jacking off or something, waiting for me to finish with Carl. A woman advice, this is from Spider, hey, Dick and Sean,

remember that time I asked for advice about a woman? Thank you, honey. That was not in the email. You said I should be an outright bastard. He wrote in asking for advice about a woman. Yeah, yeah, apparently I said he should be an outright bastard checks out I should have been after dancing around with her for another year She ended things saying I was always a contingency plan. She could never love She said all that. Nice.

Who wrote that for her? Who wrote that for her? She's been a coslider. Was that you? Me, oh my, what did you say to provoke such wrath? Contingency plan. That she could never love. Oh God.

A few months after telling me that, she's engaged to someone. Fuck women, this sucks. I should have listened to you. But you pussyfooted around it. You thought that by playing hard, you would risk losing something you didn't have to begin with, buddy. So you should always listen to me. Is he, is somebody helped, somebody helped George?

Hey, suppressed. Yeah, somebody helped George. Hey, suppressed. Yeah, somebody helped him. It says my mic. Yes, there you are. What the fuck is with this suppression shit? We Greeks can never get a break around here. We're the biggest minority. Are you a Greek?

I don't know, my name suggests, I could be black according to Netflix. Alex Apple, you never know. That's very Greek. I thought that was a shake, I could be black according to Netflix. Alex Apple. You never know. That's very agree. I thought that was a shake. I just read recently I'm African. Yeah.

I'm African too now that they're getting, now that we're getting $1.2 million from California. Hot damn. Yeah. The show is, the show is now moved to 12 15 on Sundays. There we go. Even though I'm going to kind of show up anyway. So you're black also. You can get the, you can get the 1.2 million.

Okay. How you been, buddy? You just did a big, you just did a big kickstarter for your comic, didn't you? Yeah. Yeah. Indiegogo as a matter of fact, me and the legendary razor fist are doing a comic that he wrote and our campaign passed $219,000. Wow.

That's a great job. What's it called? I'm going to look it up right now. wrote and our campaign passed $219,000. Oh, what's it called? I'm gonna look it up right now. It's called Ghost of the Badlands. Ghost of the Badlands. Yeah. Indie Go Go. There it is.

Wow, how much do you pocket at a $200,000? For a comic? A lot of people take fees before him or I get anything, but after taxes and fees and whatnot, I would say a considerable amount. That's awesome. A lot of campaigns actually have trouble because the creators don't realize how much it's going to cost a print and ship books. So, I don't even know how much anyone's going to make until the very end, basically. Yeah. Vito just did his Indiegogo comic, and he's got a level where you get like a lunchbox and stuffed animals of the main characters and pins.

Like, dude, like, you have to sell... Yes, to be careful with that. Yeah, you have to sell hundreds to make that cost-effective. Yeah, especially with printing books, but printing copies of anything or making copies of anything, it's usually, if you make more of it, you get the discount. Yeah. But if you only do a few hundred, you're kind of screwing yourself unless, you know, if it's not necessarily that he wants to make a huge profit or something like that, it doesn't

matter so much. But, yeah, that's the fallback when you fuck up. As well, I didn't want to make a huge profit off this as it turns out. Okay, good job, then. You nailed it. It's fair. I mean, everybody's got their own goals, but like from my experiences, I've run a bunch

of campaigns before. That's why I was given the honor of handling this circus. But I've learned that the more skews, the more items that you have for sale, the more things can go wrong. If, say, somebody orders a bundle of multiple books and a poster and a t-shirt, if one of those things gets held up, you can't send any of those packages. And then you've got hundreds of, or maybe thousands of pissed off customers saying, where's my stuff? Or 10? It can, or 10, yeah. Yeah, it's, you know, it's, it's one of those things where if you're going to have trouble, you want to have trouble on a small scale.

Yeah. So we kept it pretty simple this time. But if we do another one, maybe we'll offer more stuff, we'll see. This is cool, man. I'm looking at it right now, ghost the bat. Razorfish likes this pulpy, old school classic gritty western classic era. I don't know the name for it, but he's always talking about it, is it? Yeah, pulps, westerns. This was very much influenced by the shadow and stuff, but also old Clint Eastwood westerns like pale rider and

high planes drifter he always talks about and even a little bit of the great silence if any of you have seen that. No, what's that? Is that a Clint Eastwood movie? No, it's a spaghetti western actually. It's about a mute guy who does, I don't know, kind of like a mysterious guy enters town and there's bounty hunters around and he doesn't talk. And it's actually got a really dark ending. It surprised me. I don't want to spoil anything. But Razor actually said that was his number one favorite Western of all time and I was

surprised. I guess I'm a basic bitch. I like Good Bad and the Ugly the most. But I don't know if I have. Do you have a favorite western, Sean? Do you remember? Back to the future three is probably my favorite western. There you go. Now any other. I don't man. Unforgiven's a good movie. Oh, yeah. Oh, what about Tombstone with, you know, what? Holiday. I got two guns. One for each of you. That movie does not date very well. No, it's why I didn't realize that it was two different directors. It's like two different movies put together.

He's like makes sense. That stupid ass love story where he's riding around. Oh my God, let's go on a picnic. And then he's like, it's so bad. Like the movie doesn't work. But that was at Kevin Koster. You're impression, oh my God, let's go out of the office. Oh yeah, Kurt Russell.

Kurt Russell, yeah. It was just, yeah, I was, yeah. That scene came out of nowhere. You know, literally out of nowhere. Whenever Kurt Russell's not acting like a psychopath, like I'm just weirded out by him. Like when he's talking to women, I'm like, I don't trust that guy.

Plus, I'm out. Just plus, I've read too much history and stuff like that. And like that's that movie is, it's of course it's like an alley fight. Completely shot in the back. Well, and the herbs were pieces of shit. Like total cops. I mean, they were just ganging in town.

Liars, pieces of shit, murderers. You know, like, I mean, they were probably justified in firing then, like in that thing. But yeah, yeah, they're coming. I mean, it's probably justified in firing then like in that thing, but they yeah, they're coming. It's yeah, because those guys were acting homeless. Yeah, sure. Fireway to kill. Yeah, that's like I doing acting homeless.

Oh, I loud and clear, buddy. He also did a lot of people don't know this. Why at ARP was involved in one of the biggest boxing fight fixes of all time. He was the referee. You can just do it around. Yeah. He was the referee. You can just sit around. Yeah, he was the referee. He was the referee. Huge scandal.

Really? Yeah, what was the fight? Well, back in the early 1900s, I can't remember the two names, but it was like one guy, you know, clearly one, and then he called it for the other guy. Yeah, he called it in. It's like, yeah, yeah, it was one of those things. All this money changed hands. It's like, yeah, it was one of those things. They have all this money change, Dan. It was, you can read about it.

It's, but it's, it's literally he was more known until Hollywood kind of came back or or a autobiography came out on him later. He was more known for fixing the, or being involved in the fight. Oh, really? Then he was a cowboy. Yeah, exactly. He's more than he ever was. Yeah. That's funny. So are you, George, are

you doing, is this a series or is this like a just one off story? There's going to be room for more if he wants to continue them. He's, you know, it's his story. I'm just illustrating and running the campaign. Yeah. This time I'm illustrating, but I'm not going to assume anything like he has every right to hire someone else that he wants to work with next time, but I have every reason to believe he's going to continue the story for sure. This is cool, man. It's your career is really like taking off.

It's cool that you're putting stuff like this out here. It has been such a weird year. Like I got booted off of Patreon in December for my stupid strips that I do, you know, the four panels. And then which one got you booted? Oh, which ones? They sent me a bunch of, they sent me an email with multiple links saying, hey, these ones are bad, these ones are bad.

So I just said, fuck it. Freeze my account, just leave it frozen, I'm done with you guys. God. And so all my money dried up for a while. And then luckily we had the Cindy Go Go on the way. So I'm just like, fuck it. I'm going to shift my career. And I did a children's book if you can. What was that?

I believe that. I can't believe it. It's called Goofberry Pie. If you go to my Twitter, it's in the profile. Okay. What do you, G prime 95? 85. Is that when you were born?

85, yeah. Little baby. All right, studio and Etsy, polka dot. What do we got done? Etsy.com, yeah. Oh are we? What are we? dot dot Etsy.com. Yeah. Oh, goobery pie. All right. Is that like, is that about pussy that you're talking about here in the kids book? Is it not at all?

You see because I'm, you know, our stuff is more adult and, you know, sarcastic and stuff, but this is actually a real family slash children's thing. So we made a completely different shop for real, you know, people are age where I have in kids or grandkids or something like that. Totally wholesome. The story is very sweet. It has no agenda or anything. We wanted to do something really classic.

Right. I'm not finding it. Help me find it again. Etsy, Goobery, I found a studio. J. It's been removed from the internet. Has it? Help me find it again. Etsy, Goobery, I found a studio, Jay, it's been removed from the internet. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it.

It's polka dot P O K I. Oh, okay. Wait, I think I found that. Yeah. Polka dot, that Etsy dot. Okay. Yes. There we go. Goobery, Pony. Goofberry. Goofberry. Oh, that's cute. That's cool. I think adults just need like constant books to read their kids. Yeah. Oh, that's cute. That's cool. I think adults just need like constant books to read their kids.

Yeah. In this case, yeah, we designed it. It's not for kids to be able to read. It's like Winnie the Pooh or something. So it's really like a bedtime story kind of thing. We have a lot of parents. I even had teachers reading it to their kids at school. Oh, okay.

And I didn't even have to dress up like a drag queen to go say hi to them. It was wonderful. It was the sweetest thing, man. Like I went there and all the kids had read the book. They even made art for me as a present. It was so cute. It was really sweet and they were really into it. And they just love being read stories like this

and it's filled with pictures. So I want to make this a whole series and the only thing I have to do is figure out how to find time for all this. But you know, and there's no black people in this story, right? Is that part of the... There's no people, hey, there's no people in it. So that's true.

It's a cute, nice story. But I will warn you, there is a cat in it, and that's very scary. Well, yes, women are, that's good. You got to get, so, bliminally, you have to teach the kids that women are evil. And they've got to watch out for weasels.

That's one of the lessons of the story. Weasels. Yeah, they're the ones who use it. So you, this is amazing, man. This is so cool to see you went from like the political cartoons to being this art production brand. That's awesome. Yeah.

I mean, I could still do this strip. So just, you know, since they cut off my income from it, I'm like, I may as well do these other things that I've always wanted to do. And I'm very fortunate that people are enthusiastic about, you know, the shift. And we'll see what happens this year. Next. Yeah. Speaking of shift, I think the, I don't know, you popped up on my radar because Matt

Walsh decided to be a huge prick to you about like, I mean, I, like everybody knows, I just have this deep-seated contempt for conservatives and Republicans because I remember how they were when I was a kid. Like, I remember who they really are. And I can see them going back to their roots, which is like Trump made them cool for a little bit because he is cool and he is a liberal. But now that he's gone, they're like returning to their judgmental, satanic panic, anything that you like anime is for pedophiles, cartoons are gay, like they just hate art. And I can see them seething and maulding about it. Matt Walsh being like patient zero of this.

Yeah, and he was trying to complain. I don't remember what the thing he was doing was, like he, he bundled his argument, saying video games are, for, they're not appropriate for kids, which is a sensible, like violent video games are not appropriate. And he's like, oh, I thought everybody agreed with this, but that's not what I said. He was talking shit about video games period. Period. Yeah.

Adults shouldn't be playing them. It's not like a respectable thing to do. like you have better things to do with your time Like oh, yeah, like by gay chocolate or not gay chocolate Malos like watching the daily wire all day It's very puzzling to me and like you said like it reminds me of the 90s when they're saying basically the only books Your kids should read are the Bible and you know, they should only play wholesome video games There's a lot of violence. Ship that happens in the Bible by the way.

Oh yeah. A lot of vengeance, a lot of yeah. Wrath. Yeah. A lot of like this is bad. Here I'm going to explain it for 40 pages. Well I mean just just skip the whole full testament. You're trying to lady to salt.

You can just say like don't do this behavior. Yeah. I'd have to put Turner into salt. Right. So I know we know he's full of it anyway. Like he's just not, I've, I said in a sort of incendiary way, hey, debate me. And he's, I'm thinking avoiding the conversation because he knows that I can point out several anime games, movies, whatever comics that are awesome for adults.

So they're trying to act like it's this immature medium that man, children only consume. Which I make this shit. Why are you even acting like, oh, you're gonna call me a man child because I make comics or children's stories. He made a children's story for God's sakes. Oh, he did? He made Johnny the Walrus.

Oh yeah. Which is talking about that. What is that? Is it suck? It's a book about a boy who says he's a walrus and his mom goes along with it. It's okay, but I think goofberry pie is better. So it's like a mafia also. Yeah, I just don't want to say. I'm just, he's not just him. Like, there's the conservative argument, the Republican, I call them country club Republicans. They're acting like we're not going to even bother trying to win the culture war.

We're not going to engage with culture that young people are consuming every day and people in their 20s and even 30s now. We love games, comics and all that stuff and anime. And I can give him a million good anime to watch for adults that kids don't want to watch. And he can't say any of this is immature. And I think he knows that he's full of it. So he's avoiding my like my argument. He's just calling me names and shit. And it's like I'm saying his, his simps are telling me to leave him alone as if I'm punching down. That's my favorite part where they're like, well, stop this infighting. Like, well,

but he's saying retarded shit. He's attacking my profession. Yeah. but he's saying retarded shit. Wow, that's my profession. Yeah, like he's attacking like millions of people. Like my entire like all of my friends, stuff I just do is a hobby that's like not politically connected to anything. So if I do for a living, this asshole who has no skin in a game, like who doesn't do any of it is just mindlessly attacking it for the sake of stoking hatred against a group of people.

You know? But, like, I don't understand, like, he, if he wants to win the culture war, like, he claims, but I don't think he actually does, because all the profit in war comes from the war itself, not from winning the war. So I can imagine a scenario where they just want to keep it going and they never want to actually win. If they want to win, they will try to engage with media that the people they're trying to reach are consuming.

Yeah. It's like, it reminds me of footloose. Like dancing is the devil. You could imagine like conservatives just by nature. Anytime there's a media revolution or advancement, they're like, well, listening to the radio is the devil. Well, 100%. Television is the devil.

Elvis Presley is the devil. Anime is the devil. It's like, anime comes from a culture that is the most conservative on the planet. So, like they're- I called them a bearded, puritanical Philistine, and he got his panties in a bunch about that. Like, and he goes like, I don't know, remember what he said, like, how dare you call me that?

And I'm like, okay, I'm sorry for calling you bearded, but the rest is true. Like what the, you can't act like, yeah, like you're saying, like dancing all fun is evil and of the devil, anime is demonic. And I'm asking, like, what saying like dancing all fun is evil and of the devil anime is demonic and I'm asking like what anime are you watching? He said yoga is satanic Matt Walsh has an article saying that yoga is satanic because it comes from like a culture that isn't Christian Original here Well, this is the same thing that like Nostoc Christians do like they have meditation ceremonies that are identical to yoga It's just like this is just white broads doing it like for their health, you know, quote unquote, like, but the fuck is wrong with

you. Yeah. You got to know what his you look for the monsters. You'll see him everywhere. Yeah. Yeah. The Christian argument and I think he's pretty super Catholic. He's trying to say like, you have to focus your spiritual energy on Jesus. And instead of focusing on yourself and inner spirituality, which to a super Christian, yeah, I understand why they would try to make that argument to other Christians. But if you're trying to engage with people in the middle who don't know what's going on, you have to start speaking their language. Instead of insisting, it's like being a missionary and going to some island and saying, hey, you guys need to learn English so that I could tell you the gospel.

Instead of, I'm going to learn your language. The missionary show is that put some shirts on you whores. Yeah, like, okay, well, you can go. Go back. I don't think that's going on. And an actual good Christian like a CS Lewis or something would argue that that's just how they dress. And you are the one who has to get used to that. That's normal for them. So if he's trying to talk to people who are in the middle who are quote, worldly, he has to accept that this is entertainment that they think is normal.

And he's acting like he's better than everybody else. It drives me crazy. And I'm not necessarily a practicing Christian, but I do want to do better in the culture war. Yeah. At least I'm trying to. I think he's full of it. Yeah, I think he is too. I don't think you can say you're, I don't think you can say you're doing anybody a service but yourself when you're insulting yoga and anime and video games. Like, all right, man. Christian yoga group. Yeah, you're kind of like just and video games. Like, all right, man. I'm a Christian yoga group.

Yeah, you're kind of like just like, what are you doing now? It just kind of seems like you're hurting, like you're hurting everybody to make yourself rich at this point if you're picking fights with video games and yoga. Yeah, and they're acting like I'm the one picking the fight with him.

Yeah. He's the one that said that shit and he goes, oh, because he, I found a tweet of his from five years ago as if I dug it up. It showed up on my Twitter feed. I don't know how it got there. Yeah, but he really thinks this stuff, like even in his video game thing, in his video game article and Matt Walsh's video game article, uh, he says, he said he is on the side of video games cause violence.

Like he says, I could show you studies that they do cause violence and you could show me studies that you don't. And the, the, the, the, the forfeit there is that he's the one trying to prove that they do. Yeah. Like you don't just give up that opinion. Like at no point did you say, I was mistaken.

They actually don't actually cause any violence at all. Like that's retarded. Most, most people wouldn't, I mean, most people wouldn't, they're clinging to their points, they're clinging to their beliefs. Yeah. So he's still got that. Now he's just trying to lie and say, like, well, you know, all I said was, like, no, you think that, I know that you think that because you, like, you intimated it with

this argument. We know, we got you, got your ass. Anyway. Back in the 2000s, there was this guy named Jack Thompson. I remember, we all started with him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all the same arguments, but I can't see it as anything as clout. They claim that we're clout chasing by counter-punching their arguments, but like, you're just going

after normal things that adults and young people like. Yeah. And saying that, oh, you shouldn't consume those things. It's bad for your soul. And this is a religious argument versus a cultural argument. If you want to talk to people in the culture, you have to at least respect what that culture is. Like, again, I'm making comics for adults. Young people might read them, I don't know, but I'm not aiming

it for young people. But if I'm trying to talk to a younger person and they're all they watch is anime and play video games, I have to at least be able to speak to them on that level. So at least they need to have some proficiency with that dialect. And when you draw the people in the nose looks like this, Sean. This is the big issue, right? You draw the person and the nose is like this and the eyes are big. Got it. That's satanic. Yeah.

Got the devil eyes. Oh, did you see somebody got convicted? This was a good one. Let me see if you have a take on this. In Canada, a Canadian man is sentenced to prison over AI-generated child pornography. Report. A Canadian man is being sent to prison

for creating synthetic AI-generated videos of child pornography. AI is going to send us all to prison. That's how it takes over. I mean, that in deep fakes, there's gonna be more and more of that shit. He pleaded guilty to creating at least seven videos

using deep fake technology, which uses algorithms to perform face swaps to create the illusion of someone saying or doing something. I mean, this is so crazy to me. Like everyone listening to this story is making a deep fake of child porn in their heads right now.

So why? Because they're trying to figure it out. It's like, what face are you putting on a? The concept of explaining the crime is identical to the crime. So how the fuck? Yeah, how do they get the, how the fuck are you going to jail for something that you can't do?

Does he can distribute it or something? Like, you know, distribute what? I'm distributing the concept of child porn. Why the concept? Child porn right now. But if you can see it, that's different. But you can, there's no difference between hearing my words

and interpreting it in your brain and seeing a fake image and interpreting it in your fucking brain. It's identical. That's crazy, but this is gonna be the future. Oh yeah, you can't use, you can't disseminate this horrible material, like, yeah. It's in the headline, you said, child porn in the headline, that's the same.

No one was harmed, it's the same fucking thing that you did right there. Yeah, I don't know. George, you got any opinion on this one? It's fucked up and we're going to see more of it. I think when you see people, when you see people doing lawsuits of like people that they know or celebrities or something and people get sued. Yeah.

But as AI becomes more and more of a thing, like even just AI art with the silly, there's memes of like, Pedro, draw a hot woman with lots of boobs and then it gives the woman like 20 boobs or something. Nice. And it always messes up the hands or something. And then a lot of people were joking to me like, Hey, yeah, there's, I'm going to be out of a job because they don't need artists like me to illustrate hot chicks anymore or something like that.

And it's like, well, I mean, this is kind of a tangent, but like I always think I as an illustrator, I'm never going to lose my job because I'm not worried about low level illustrations that can be done by a computer. I think about a movie like, um, Jiro Dreams of Sushi where he's like a sushi specialist. And if you want really good sushi, you go to this guy at Girol. If you want grocery storage sushi, you can go to the grocery store. So the only thing that like when people ask me about the AI thing, I say, that means I have to get better at illustrating.

I can't stop it from happening. I think it's messed up. I'm scared of it, but that just means I have to train harder. Yeah. I think the people on top will survive. But all the people in the middle and the people on the bottom will be like. The artists who have an interesting style or have something interesting to say. But yeah, I've even had clients who have tried to ask me to illustrate for their books. And then they would generate AI of like, oh, this is the kind

of illustration, like a fantasy book of, here's like a giant spaceship. And this is what the space suit outfits might look like. And they send me this AI art. And I'm thinking like, I'm just basically tracing over what you made. Why are you even hiring me if you don't want to have my interpretation? Yeah. So yeah. Yeah, I fed one of the art protskis, all of his pictures that he's drawn for this show. Yeah, I fed it into an AI and it made like amazing replications of what he would draw. Really? Oh, yeah, it's really cool. Wow.

Yeah. All right, anyway, man. I don't know. Do you want to plug anything? Anything make you a rage recently that you want to talk about? A rage. Matt Walsh, goddammit. I want him to debate me or somebody of his level,

because I really want to embarrass them in front of everybody. Just, I'll say, like, here's some anime you need to watch before you even talk to me, before you're even qualified. Yeah. They won't do it, because they don't have the guts. But as far as plugging, I would love to propose for everybody to take a look at Ghost of the Badlands. It's an awesome book. Grazerfist is an awesome writer and he's even an artist. I don't know if people know that.

So I hope this project and other indie projects really get people pumped to support indie books. And I hope this is only the start of many years of success. Yeah, I think so. It feels like it is more any stuff. They're trying to be trying our best. They're charging like 25 bucks a book for some of this stuff, Sean. There are a hundred pages though.

It is pretty long. Yeah. So and also because it's low quantity. Yeah, that's more bang for your buck. It is. I mean, if we were printing like tens of thousands of books, we can go cheaper. But these are going to be specialists, you know, shiny glossy pages, collector's items. It's going to be, you know, it's for that kind of collector.

And there will be a retail version down the road someday, perhaps. Well, congratulations on all your success. You smell terrific. Thanks. Join back by now that you're off Patreon. Go over to back by, try it out. You got it. Just register.

Let people throw you some stable coins. Yeah. Enjoy yourself. All right, buddy. Thank you for calling in. Talk to you next time. See ya. Bye.

Suppresses ass. Back to you next time. See ya. Bye-bye. Suppresses ass. Back to suppression. Okay. Adam says, bag policy rage. I recently had an experience that sent me into a major rage. My wife and I met some friends for dinner before heading to a stand-up show. We parked at a garage by a restaurant, planning on walking to the show after dinner. She bought the tickets online.

The theater's site stated the bag policy was a handheld clutch no larger than eight by five. This was knowledge my wife had before we even left the house. Her bag was a solid eight by eight. As we left the restaurant, our other friend offered to put the bag in her car for us. But again, my wife insisted her bag. It'll come in. It'll be fine.

It'll be fine. Halfway to the theater, we encountered several guys walking back to the car with bags that were wives' bags. There you go. They commented to us that she could not take that bag in. Again, she said it would be fun. But still, we finally figured out who the idiot is here. Yeah, right? Yeah. We finally get to the theater and big fucking surprise. They won't let her bag in. She looks at me

and says, I'm sorry. Like we didn't tell her this would happen at least six times. We, who's we parenting this wife? I had to walk her shit back and then was late getting to the show. The tickets she bought me for Christmas. The best part was she was in a terrible mood the next day and revealed that it was because I had the audacity to be annoyed at walking her fucking bag back to the truck, just sharing my grief. Go fuck yourself and see what you're doing.

Well, you know, it's your fault, obvious. That's why she's correct to be mad, it's your fault. You entertained it a little bit long when all evidence pointed to the contrary of what she said, right? Yeah, you were treating your wife like a man because you're gay. It's a bit harsh. Instead of like a woman and saying, give me your fucking bag.

Yeah, we know that's, look, it's the same size. I know you have problems with like, like spatial orientation and like multiple people telling you to do the same thing. I know that doesn't compute. It's like, look, your bag is at least as big as this guy's bag. He's walking back to the car, pissed off. Yeah. And his wife is gonna be pissed at him tomorrow.

And this guy's bag. Do you not want to, like, do you have tampons or something? I'll put, give me a tampon and I'll carry it in. Is that the problem? Well, then why the fuck aren't you put, then put the fucking bag in the car. How about that? Right.

She's gonna be mad at you anyway. So get it out of the way. Sure. You want to put, you want to put your bag in the car. How about that? She's gonna be mad at you anyway. So get it out of the way. Sure. You want to put your bag in my car? Now I'll be good. Put your fucking bag in the car. Yeah. I do have to say, I do recommend letting a fight go on for longer than like it's probably healthier to because it will be surprising. It will clear your, it'll clear your mind. Yeah. I got all day to do nothing to fight. Yeah. Well, no your mind. Like, it'll, yeah. I got a whole day to do nothing but fight. Yeah. Well, no, you don't even have to,

that's just, I could watch the Godfather too today. Yeah. Without interruption. Right. Without having to explain. Right. What happens? Why it's back in time now. Yeah. It's gonna be fucking great. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have watched a movie in silence in 10 years.

I thought this was a sequel. What's also, shut up. Yeah. Um, Johnny says, man, what's the point? I don't care if this is on the podcast or not. But if it does wind up getting read, I'd prefer to stay anonymous. Well, you got kind of an anonymous name there. But I've been listening to the Dix show. I've been listening to Dick and Sean since episode 12 of the OG biggest problem. So you've been an ever-present part

in my entire adult life. Very unhealthy, is that what somebody called this show? Probably. Yeah, on the reviews of very unhealthy show. Regardless of whether or not calling a podcast, the important to me is gay or whatever. I really don't have anyone else to reach out to. Uh-oh. I've had a

rough go of things up to this point. When I was a kid sometime around puberty, I became super depressed out of nowhere. Yeah, the puberty will do that. I think it had something to do with my religious upbringing and a feeling of never living up to what was expected of me. I tried to kill myself freshman year of high school, but I fucked it up. I mean, people fuck it up. And to this day, I've only ever told a handful of people. Only a few months after that. That's the size of our audience. After that, my dad died who I was close to. Oh boy, years go by and I got my shit together. I got a good paying job and I got married to young. Couple years into that stress of work got to me

and I started drinking way too much. The drinking combined with the insane work hours, 80 plus hours a week. Wow, what was he doing? Wow, I don't know. I don't know how to do that. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know what it needs to be. I don't know.

It almost sounds like, you know, people work starting out at a law firm. Oh, they do that. Like the companies like expect you to work 80 hours a week. The only person who works 80 plus hours a week is any woman. That's so much work today. Oh, yeah. Okay. The only one who has a migraine every day. Every day. Wow. Right.

So much stress. Women complaining. It's like when a dog huffs, you know, that's like women complaining about their migraines. Yeah. It's the same feeling I have. What is your fucking complaining? 80 plus hours a week wound up tearing my marriage apart. You're tearing me apart, Lisa! I really love that girl. And despite time passing by, me moving to a different state, getting a different job and new friends, I still find it incredibly hard to care about

anything or anyone new. Every day the world around me feels a little smaller. I care a little less about everything I do or used to care about. And I'm slowly losing what little sense of self I ever had. I don't even, maybe buying veto's comic will help. You think that? Personally, I don't think so, but I mean, medical, but he's depressed and then he's also giving money to veto.

I don't even give a shit about the stuff that used to make me angry, politics, social issues, internet bullshit. Well, you shouldn't care about that stuff anyway. Well, I mean, it's not, I guess he's, that's a, he's, he's just trying to care about this very unhealthy stuff that I cared about. I don't care about that. Yeah. No, that's, I mean, that's true.

That's the symbolic commercial. It's like that little guy who's not happy anymore. He's like going online, arguing on Twitter and he's like, I don't even care about arguing on Twitter anymore. You're cured. Try symbol to. You're cured. Yeah.

Yeah. Are you, are you, do you not care about winning arguments on the internet anymore? Try, Advanta. It's a new depression medicine that will get you back online. Get you back online caring about it. I'm very unhealthy situation. Yeah, get you back online caring about shit. I don't know what the end game is. Well, the end game is you die. Well, yeah, it's everybody's end game. Yeah, spoiler alert. I don't know what I'm waiting for or what I'm working towards. I'm not a terminally online loser.

I have a good job. I have a car. I have a home. I have real life friends. Just that none of it makes me happy. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know.

I don't really know what my question is. I guess if either of you two ever went through a phase where life felt pointless, but it phase. It's not pointless. it's a prison. Like you're locked here and you're a slave to your five senses. But see, everything is terminally dissolving around you. But everything in your life that you build dissolves while you build it.

Here's the difference between what I think between you and him. I see you and you've always been able to enjoy no matter how fucked up things are, whatever. Like you may be overall, you know, my sewage. Can you believe that happened to me? But you, I think you have the ability to be like what they call it, you know, in the moment, you are can genuinely enjoy something while it's happening. And I don't believe that he has done that in a long, long time. I don't really know what my question is. I guess if, oh, yeah, if you went through a phase where life felt pointless, I'd love

to know how you got out of it. Thanks for the tent, the years of podcasts. I hope there are many more. I mean, I'll, I'll say this, maybe a lot of people, I haven't heard a lot of people talk about this or say this, so I'll tell you because it's helped me. And I think it's a very good, I think it's a healthy way to look at things. Sometimes you have, like the overwhelming consensus

and zeitgeist is one of self-actual The overwhelming consensus and zeitgeist is one of self-actualization and achievement and putting your will, like willing yourself to be the things that you want and to achieve happiness and find it. But I think there is more value in a slave mindset where you just go about like, like if you decide to stop drinking or lose weight or exercise pressure off yourself.

Well, it's like you're not, it's not the will, it's not the will to do these things that will drive you through it. It's the slavery to a decision you made. Like it's a distinct difference between like, I have to put pressure on myself to do these things. I was like, no, see that. I already decided it. I'm just gonna do it.

Like, I don't have the choice to do it or not. I'm just, the slavery is the freedom. Yeah, a lot of ways. I understand if you can, but it's a fear thing with most people. It is. And I think that's like part of, part of I think enjoying life,

if you are struggling to, is resigning yourself to the fact that it's a fucking prison, and it's misery, constantly, and that you don't have a choice over most of it. Well, that's, it will just beat you and beat you and beat you, and you have to just accept it. Well, you have to, that's it. There is no happy, like you have less control

than you think you do in many ways. And you can only control about it. They'll tell you all this shit about what you do, you're out looking at it. It's like, no, it's, yeah, you're out look, you maybe you're, maybe you would feel more comfortable if you're out look is just one of like, yeah, fuck it. It's just like, what am I gonna do?

Kill myself? No, I'm just not, I'm not, I'm not gonna do, I am I gonna do? Kill myself? No. I'm just not. I'm not. I'm not gonna do, I'm not gonna do that. So here I am. Yeah, you said something. And then once you like write that off, like if you just give up, like, yeah, I'm not gonna do it.

So I guess I'm just here. Well, you still get to die as they, you know. You still get to die, but not the way you want to. Right. But or maybe or maybe you do. Maybe you look out, maybe you'd be spectacular. I'd have to you. But it's I think that a lot of people, they feel like they can control things that nobody can control.

Now, and they don't realize that they can control things and should be controlling things that will help them. And you just don't think that you have, it's people have their control priorities. You have misaligned, just because they don't know. And then you'll find that your new house is interconnected to the sewer. And you're like, wow, all those existential problems

are really not a fucking problem to me too. Yeah, I've got a monetary problem. Yeah, I really want to call up the sewerlineinspector.com. We'll let it fucking argue with him. Here's what I'll say. Uh, he can't move on. The hardest thing if you have a, if you have a great memory and light kick in your own ass, which I, which I have a feeling he does, because he mentions drinking and tearing his marriage apart. Oh, yeah, I'm sure he feels that may have been sucked anyway. I'm sure he feels incredibly guilty for driving a wedge between him and he realizes that

he was probably the one swinging the hammer. The hardest goddamn thing in the world is to realize that you can't do a goddamn thing about it. And Dick, I'll tell you, I will be perfectly honest. I still can't. I still am not okay with that. They're still, they're still one tenth of one percent chance that I think through sheer will. I can read one time. I can read one time. It can fucking happen. And you can't do a goddamn thing about it. It's fucking done.

You can't, and if there's nothing to do, but give that up. And it's a fucking hard thing, but you have to. You have to, you go, I can be better for, you could use it however you want, but don't use it to keep reliving it Oh, yeah, that's the that's the That's the

That's the what literally the worst thing you can do is to use it as a fucking well like those whatever religion used to Fucking beat the shit out of themselves. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know Catholics come I mean what you know, there's that one, that's a scare religion too. But yeah, yeah, that's whatever you, you got it, you've got to figure out a way to let that go because it will, that will never help you. Well, I hope that was a helpful for you.

Here's one, Ants, Peace says, Sean, did you know that you can tell the temperature by how fast a cricket chirps? Did you know that? No. And the sound effect is not going to... I was thinking about animal corner. But it's very easy to write in things that like nobody would know. Do you know what I mean? These are things that they know. Well, no, it's things that they nobody would know. Do you know what I mean? But these are things that they know.

Well, no, it's things that they probably looked at like here, random, you know, crazy animal facts that I think they like everyone knows. Everyone knows. I think some animal facts, you know? Like did you know there was a whale that was, that could communicate in a frequency that no other way? I did. You see that's what I mean. Then you always know that.

It's like the, they call it the loneliest whale in the world or something, right? It's, and then you always like tap dance on knowing, like showing off when you do know the fact that I only knew a little bit of. Well, yeah, I mean, yeah, that sounds like me. If you count the number of chirps for 14 seconds and add 40, because they're more stimulated

when they're a warmer or something, the result is the current temperature is Fahrenheit. Wait a minute. The crickets only chirp between 55 and 100 degrees Fahrenheit. Between 55 and 100 degrees. Three of the crickets was 101 degrees. They stopped at 100 degrees. There's a mathematical formula. That can't be perfect accurate.

Perfect. I don't know if you can say it. You can say there's a mathematical formula. That can't be perfect accurate. This fucking Ants guy says, crickets chirping. It's a hell of a fact if that's formula. Let's see here. Dolbyers law. That's got a name. Yeah, count the number of chirps per 15 seconds.

And that's 40. That's his, that's a real thing. Well, I mean, what, and how much testing? How much, you know what I mean? Like, I don't know. 1897. Wow. The cricket us as weird dollars

is crowning cricket chirps. It seems like there's something to it anyway. But it's real. Here's the concept overall. No, I did not know that. Well, there you go. I did not know that. Yep. Did you know that. Well, there you go. I did not know that. Yep.

Um, did you know that a great white shark has around 300 teeth in its mouth at any given time? Really? Yeah, it's a lot of teeth. Well, because they got the rows, you know, they all have rows. They go forward like a conveyor belt. That's cool. Well, obviously, younger, I thought that sharks like their teeth ripped out

when they, when they bid into prey and stuff like that. Yeah. But really, they just, they just fall out. Yeah, they just, they rotate forward. So they've always got a fresh set of, you know, razor sharp teeth. Okay. The other ones get dull from, you know, whatever. The ocean. Yeah, the ocean. Hey, Dick, here's some content for the show. Utah has continued to solidify itself as a religious hellscape in Banff Hornhub. This is what happens if you try and reach the site. I mean, that was nice of them.

Yeah, I heard about that. I heard about that. They just shut off the state. Well, you just can't have nice things. Good job, idiots. You can't have nice things. You get some fucking wackos, you know? Ruining everybody's good time.

It's always what fucking happens. Yeah, it is. It really is. It's like not to get off on, you know, gun rights, right? But I mean, the crazy, overwhelming majority are totally responsible fucking people. Yes, of course, they know they're fucking, they know they can be dangerous,

they don't want their kids getting them, they don't want, you know what I mean? They do the right thing. Well, all of our like fabricated gun issues in America is just black teenagers killing each other. I mean, as long as there's a lot of violence in that community, there's no doubt about it, right? Yeah.

Like if you remove black teenagers killing each other, the US gun violence is like the same as Europe. Oh, really? Cause I, yeah. I mean, and so much of the, you've got, you had under the New Deal and stuff, you had all these like projects created, right? Yeah.

So you've got super poor people all concentrated in certain areas, and then you're pumping gasoline into their communities. That gave rise to huge gangs too. Like, yeah, a lot of gangs came out of the project. So I'm not gonna say it's like, I'm not gonna say it's because of race, but that's what it is.

And then you say, well, we've been, after, let it gasoline, the war on drugs, like we've just done over and over these things to decimate like black communities. Yeah. And then the gun violence is like a huge like the violence that happens is all with like a couple like all of the half of a third of shoplifting in New York was done by like 300 people.

Is that right? Yeah. It's like, we'll just kill them. It's like the percentage of alcoholics. Like, you know, how much booze they buy, right? Like it's like the amount of crime that's happening is a small, it's just the same people doing crimes constantly that we're just not killing for some reason. Or they not getting caught and put away all the time. So George Soros. Yeah. That's. Why not? As you may know, your elected officials in Utah are requiring us to verify your age before you access our website while safety and compliance are at the blah blah blah. Okay. So there's a giant paragraph. Sorry to government. Yeah, well,

boo. Too bad. That was just a guy with a beard. When he looking at, oh, not that I was just looking at the, looking at the cricket thing. Okay, let's do a fat watch and then get out of here. Fat watch, today and fat, uh, hey, Dick, here is a woman so fat. How fat was she? She can't save her child from rolling into traffic. All right. Oh, no. What?

How fat's the kid? I think it's an astrologer. You think the kid's rolling because he's fat? Like Indiana Jones? Something like that. All right. Let's. Okay.

Can't save her kid from rolling into traffic. This heart-stopping video going viral. Oh, no. All righty. It's in his spare. It's in his spare. Well tonight a stroller with a baby boy inside suddenly rolling to his spare. A woman collapsing twice as she tries to run out.

Okay, she's so fat. So she fell out of the car, muting this, this guy. So she, dude, get up. So she has the stroller. She doesn't engage the wheel locks because it would burn too many calories. Look at this mid flight. I got a bad Superman taking off. Oh, no, my baby. Oh, God. Oh, they're face hit the ground. Yeah, like a fish like something missed a fish. Bikes fucking peer, whatever it's called wearing wearing minimizing leotards for some reason. And then try to get up again. Okay, now let's see your get up. This is like when Jesus was nailed to the cross, then he fall down three times on the march to. Oh, yeah, we can see the medications of the cross. The carry is on cross. Yeah. Right. Crossed a bear, right? Yeah. Yeah. There she goes,

tries to get up. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Tim leggings got caught like a bolo like a cartoon What was that? I'm gonna ask you fucking last. So yeah, yeah, yeah, look, is that what a great question? You just like, pants are falling down because she's so fat. I was like, how did she not get it?

She was basically there. Yeah, yeah, okay, so here's the first, yeah, watch when she tries to get up. It's her pants have fallen down and they're restricting her movement, see? I guess, yeah. Oh no, that guy comes, runs out like a normal human being. Jesus Christ. The stroller. Dude, I think that newscaster was, because he, he's California,

I think there's a police sketch of a suspect that looks exactly like him. He's presenting on it. Yeah, he's probably like, oh my God. Dude. Oh God, all of her clothes came off. So this guy run, her stroller, her baby stroller is rolling down a hill into oncoming traffic, not oncoming. It's got to be the biggest traffic. Fucking street in his spare.

I don't know if you've ever been there, but it's a fucking little, yeah. She needs to do more math. So she tries to run after the stroller and she just keeps falling and then this guy, probably, out of nowhere and grabs the baby stroller. Right. She still hasn't got up.

Someone else has to come in and help her fat ass off the ground. Oh my God, dude. Whoa. That's amazing. You think it's a wake up call for all fat women? Nah, don't let the, oh, here she goes. Here's the first tumble.

Wow. She's wearing cross trainers too. You think that would have helped. It's amazing. She's wearing Nike trainers too. You think that would have helped. It's amazing. She's wearing Nike Activewear to wick away all the sweat. Apparently, wicks away the baby. That's a self-funny. Actually, it's not, it's even funnier because in the stroller is just a bunch of ding-dongs

and twinkies and stuff. Oh, God. It's not, it's even funnier because in the stroller is just a bunch of ding-dongs and twinkies and stuff. Oh, God. It's not a baby. And the baby's loud, the baby's just thinking, you fat bitch. Look, the baby's looking, the baby can see the mom falling over like a walrus as it's rolling to its death. Yeah. This is its first memory.

This is going to grow up into an adult. It's like, I remember my mom being too fat to save my life, save my life. Yeah. Cause she couldn't get up. Get up. That's good. And I'll rock.

Oh, just that first. This is the news. They're playing this over and over again on the news and zooming in. Yeah. Yep. And they had not wants once they call her fat it's just local woman oh my god is she can't fuck

she's fucked up look at this what is this red box that the computer keeps drawing all over everything uh... it's like a fat recognizing AI detection sensor. How did you feel about Sarah? How did you feel about how fat the lady was? Around towards the towardsthorer and died before Monday at traffic. And as a second person runs in to help the woman, Good Samaritan Ron Nessman walks the stroller back up the driveway.

She was traumatized as she was crying. She was just in shock. That's why gave her a hug. It all happened Monday afternoon around. She said she might not eat. She didn't say that. She didn't say that. That's wild. That's, I mean, that's, that's good video. That's the news that I want to see. Fat news.

That's, I mean, Jay Gutierrez says, author Virginia Sol Smith claims fat bias promotes white supremacy. Patriarchy, yeah, of course it does. Author of Virginia Sol Smith. I thought we've covered, well, this is April, this is brand new, man. No, but I mean, this is after press. There was somebody else who was kind of saying the same thing. Maybe it was on who are these podcasts or maybe it's all fat women as it turns out. Okay.

Say this. A weight culture journalist said during an interview Tuesday that fitness-minded people working on a thin body type are complicit with white supremacy and patriarchy. Yeah, that's just great. Yeah, you know, yes. Just great. Yes, definitely, definitely, thinness is a patriarchy thing because you have to do work and not be a big fat slob that just sits around all day doing nothing.

Well, you have an unfair advantage. You have testosterone. Yes. I'm better than you. Author of Virginia SoulSmith told NPR's Fresh Air podcast, wow, what a, what a, what a burst of fresh air for you to come on and be fat all over our show. And blame men for that United States society's desire to be skinny and adversity to fatness can be traced to the end of American slavery

as a way of preserving out of touch, out of touch, white beauty standards. The computer preserving out of touch. Yeah. So I guess, okay. Do any math equations fit like a weird giant neck or a big fat slob that's gone. Has that they were done that? You can tell the temperature by how many drops of sweat and then you multiply it by 14. You divide it.

Very good. Very good. Very good. And an ideal is definitely a white ideal. The implication being that there's a lot of sweat, right? That's a- What about Ethiopia? Yeah. When is thinness a white ideal?

Are there a lot of fat guys in China or India? Is that like a Kenya? The thin ideal. What are the Kenyans there? Who's the fucking marathon runners, man? Yeah. Cause you gotta run all day. Well, they do say it's a cultural thing.

I was watching this thing. In other words, it's like, no, you just run. Run, run. Love it. Yeah. Everything's flat. I guess so. I would rather walk like 20 miles flat than two blocks at an incline.

Yeah. Yeah. The thin ideal is definitely a white ideal. That's very racist. If I said something like, like if David Duke came out and said, being thin is white. The thin ideal is definitely a white ideal. That's very racist. If I said something like, like if David Duke came out and said, being thin is white, people would be very pissed off. Yeah.

When we trace the history of the modern diet culture, we really trace it in the United States to the end of slavery. Like, no other country can possibly have their own standards of beauty ideals or anything. It's so like it always drives me fucking crazy when he tries to paint kind of like the world with it's like fucking. Well, and it's like America centric.

Yeah. Like no one shit out of your brain. Africans want to be. Yeah. You know, like no one in Africa is ever like, you should lose some weight. That's just, that's never happened. Cause you don't need fucking food. Promoting your new book, Fat Talk, parenting in the age of diet culture.

Obviously, white supremacy is trying to maintain the power structure. I love it when people begin a sentence with obviously, when it's, it's certainly not a fact, you know, like it's like, obviously two and two equals four. Yeah. But it's like, no, obviously, I'm going to say something that I really don't have any proof for that's not really racist. Not really racist. Yeah.

What? Yeah, wait a minute. What's obvious? Obviously. So celebrating a thin white body as the ideal body is a way to other and demonize black and brown bodies. There we go. Black, fat black people are like everywhere.

You can't, I challenge you to go one, 124 hour period without seeing a fat black woman. Well, but that's what that isn't that what she's saying? No, she's saying that we're celebrating thin white people, but we're not. We're celebrating fat black women. Oh, you're, oh, we're celebrating. Oh, okay. I mean, turn on the TV. What do you see?

Fat black women. Oh, that's what you mean. I thought you meant out in the world. Like it's like, oh, no, no, I'm in media and stuff. Out in the world, good fucking luck not seeing a fat black woman. We're not in the way. But no, you're going to travel somewhere. Entertainment. Yeah luck not seeing a fat black woman. You're not aware. But no, you're gonna travel somewhere. Entertainment.

Yeah, we're celebrating, yeah, I mean, fat black woman. I mean, yeah, they're not, I don't think they're underrepresented in celebration. Yeah, they're not overrepresented either. That's about accurate. But all I'm saying is we're doing plenty of celebrating fat black women. And brown bodies, bigger bodies, anyone who doesn't fit into that norm. So it's really about maintaining the systems of white supremacy and patriarchy. Okay.

Fuck you, idiot. Yeah, definitely. I mean, she sees what she came up with and that's what she wants to... Oh my Jesus Christ. Riley is sort of a whale. Riley. and that's what she wants to, oh my Jesus Christ. Riley, some sort of a whale. Oh, it's a woman. Not that Riley, a different one. So this is a woman, a fat woman, an mermaid costume

that looks to be about 700 pounds. That's big, dude. This is a whale. This is not a mermaid anymore. This is a whale- She's a pool. Looks like there's a stripe on her. I don't, it's a moat.

Actually, she's not in a pool. She's wearing a mermaid tail, her tits are wobbling like fat woman tits, which have a different sort of jiggle physics pattern to them. That's his market price on this. Oh my god. Yeah. Looking like Ursula the Sea Witch. Oh my god, why would this exist? Why do they make a mermaid costume in this size? Sean, look at the size of it. I don't, I think that's a tumor made costumes together, maybe. A tumor?

A tumor made costumes. Oh, tumor made costumes. Yeah, yeah. Biggest dinosaur. Oh my god. It's a cut. It's Yeah. Biggest dinosaur. Oh my God. It's the size of a car.

And some of these blood vessels are so wide that you could swim down. Oh my God. I think it's him. I'm talking about a blue whale. Oh, you know that. It's the size of a car. Yeah. You could swim down the blood vessels.

So what he said. I mean, yeah, large enough. What? Maybe two in front of the heart. The blood vessels? I don't know. I mean, it's not she couldn't swim down it. No, she couldn't.

No, she would, that would definitely be the, well, we need a fucking angel of plastic. Poor Mary. We definitely need that. Okay. Okay, Ben, you also sent a video. Let's take a look at it. Oh my, that's disgusting.

Some sort of black guy having pretend sex with a fat woman. And then whipping her fat ass. Let's go. He's having a black guy's having simulated sex and then whipping her fat ass. What's wrong? Ow. He's having a black eyes, having simulated sex with a shigantically gross fat woman. Why is he... Why is he... I don't know.

She has this bathing suit that's like a sumo wrestler. It's a, I don't know what you call it. Looks like someone has drapes that they've just yanked under her pussy to put in the back. I'm not sure what this whole thing is. Um, he's out here providing those messages. I think he means massages. What the guy says, his name is Funk Flex. His three million followers.

Well, black guy that loves on fat women. Funk Flex. A manual, is this her? Is this the girl that he's messaging? Out here, providing those messages for all sizes, this guy the best to ever do it. How much does he charge? Ladies, what would you pay?

Every one of this is the guy. Yes, okay, this is the guy who is messaging fat women. But he's like doing gross sex stuff too. Okay. Not just messaging. I could use a message right now. Yeah. I'll be honest with you.

What is that weird bug? All right, maybe we have one more. This one's from Cl world. Okay. Sounds promising. Think, oh my God, things plus size travelers hate. Okay. Things plus size travelers hate part that's a That's not their voice That's the sound that her pants make Something makes more struggling to find plus size friendly accommodation the fat taxa having to pay more for everything Having to do hours of research before travel struggling to find plus

research before travel. Struggling to find plus the highest funding rental car. Ha ha fuck are you talking about? What is a plus size car? Cars have only gotten bigger. And I'm big enough. You have any cars where there's no center console and it's like a bench seat in the steering wheels in the middle? No. Yeah.

Why do you ask? Right, no reason. No reason. No reason. No reason. No reason. No reason. No reason. No reason. No reason. But do you have any cars that's like,

Pretty soon, Amazon's gonna rent cars. Facts cars. Yeah. The New Elon Musk, the New Tesla. Yeah. This one's a plus size Tesla. Right. You can be fat as hell.

It grows, this car grows with you. And your personal weight experience. Do you have any cars that's like, it has like a bottle in the top that dispenses Doritos, like a hamster bottle when you lick it. No, there's more fat phobia. Yeah, fat phobia, white supremacy. The plus size, friendly seating at restaurants,

struggling to find cute plus size travel clothing. Not knowing if the locals are rude to fat people. seating at restaurants, struggling to find cute plus size travel clothing, not knowing if the locals are rude to fat people. They are. Everyone universally hates fat people. Isn't there an app for that? Or you can go on, it's like the most fat friendly cities or always there. I don't know. I'm just, I mean, it started as a joke and then I realized that it probably wasn't a joke.

It probably should be real if it's not real already. I was going to say more like, are they, you know, is, you know, Albuquerque, New Mexico, especially hostile to fat people? It's like, that's what I mean. Like, what's the, you know, are there waiting? It's like, what are the most fat friendly cities? Yeah, because if there is, you would think it's like, well, what's the most fatest city, but maybe they especially hate fat people because there's so many of them.

Right. You need to know what's the most shortage. What has the most fat-friendly cars? What has the most like cutest fat people clothes for traveling? Okay, what else do you have? Into Sarah and Yuber and being physically uncomfortable. Inaccessible bathrooms that aren't plus size friendly uncomfortable seating everywhere.

Things plus size travelers hate part four. Struck it. Okay. Yeah. Can't get in the toilet. Shouldn't have. The top watch. Today in fat news.

Stiaria anyway. Just fat whore. Just shouldn't have. Just fat whore. Just shit in the tub. All right, everybody, it's been the Dixio Patreon.com. Plastidix.com. See you next Tuesday. I'm ready. Working on it, working on it. Why is Windows so slow now? You got me.

You got me. You've got me. You've got me. You've got me. You've got me. You've got me. You've got me. You've got me. You've got me.

You've got me. You've got me. You've got me. You've got me. You've got me. Okay Hey, man, I don't know this will like try to shoot it so slow. What was that? We were getting better on this technology. What hey man? Hey, man button. It's like wait We're like what the way delayed delay every fucking button every fucking thing We're just happened scroll down it lags on the scroll It'll make it lags on the fucking way. Why are we doing it? That's like anti-frog yes

always we went to electronic solid state shit but the whole world wasn't like cranking a lot more all the time uh... it's slow everything is slow shit now it's all slow every time fucking stop speed it up charge charge more and make it a little worse. Everything's doing that. New models, 20% slower.

You're gonna love it. And it's also 200 bucks more money. A little bit heavier too. So your wrist will be really shitting themselves. Yeah. Okay. I hate the case on. Yep. Here's an idea for you. It's a thinner by Stephen King, but the chick is so fat.

She never dies from getting thinner. Oh, oh, the gibs who's like, how, how is she not die over it's out the curse. A bigger like Michael Thelps. Yeah. Yeah, I got it. It's called Fatter. Right. The movie. The sequel to thinner.

Yeah. thicker. Yeah. She hits her other daughter with a car and then gets a gypsy curse. You mesh with the wrong girl boss. And then a guy, the guy, did that guy die at the end of thinner? I never read it.

I know what it's about. Watch the movie though. Uh, no. Now he gets cursed right by a gypsy, yeah. Yeah, I think he has to eat her out to get rid of the curse. Oh, God. I know, that's gross.

Then he shows up and he's like, you got cursed by a gypsy. You're gonna get thinner unless you apologize. She's like, I don't apologize to shit. Oh, she just starts eating like crazy, right? Out's eat, out eats it. Yeah, that would be a cool movie. Okay.

That fucking guy, he's got kicked out of a bar the other week. Yeah. I don't wanna say that I don't quite buy your story. I just don't quite buy it I don't quite buy your story. I just don't. Oh, that guy. Quite buy something's off of the story. Something you said, it's like there's a clue. There's a giveaway. You were saying like, oh, you know, I was at this bar and you guys tell you a visit here

and you're like, oh, yeah, I'm just sitting here drinking. That's an interesting sentence. I'll replay it for everybody who didn't hear. Yeah, man, I'm just sitting here drinking. Okay, let's continue. That sentence doesn't contain any information. He only knows that. All right.

This is the way you said that in your voicemail. I could tell something was off. Like there's more to the story. No, I agree. I think you're hot. I think you probably have a big, big, everything is fine. There's just something about something off. Sucking away. Yeah, but he doesn't not quite right with that story. That's it. Okay. Sitting there drinking a drink, huh? I don't know about that.

Running your own business. This is how every dick story starts. Yeah, I didn't do anything. I was mining my own business. I have no idea. Just came out of nowhere. Okay, last one. Man, I got, you know what?

I got a response to Kevin A. Landau's domain thievery, too. I think I have to do that in three days. Oh, really? Yeah, I have to get chat GBT to write me a response. Perfect. Write me a response to someone trying to take a domain. Yeah. Okay.

You want to know what makes me a fucking rage? Yes. Is it's women and their desperate need to have something wrong with them. Something else wrong with them. That's not neurologically, like with their brains and everything being neurodivergent. One of my girlfriend's co-workers has ADHD. Right? And she's found that. This bitch cannot. And I mean cannot Stop telling everybody that I'm neurodivergent. I'm neurodivergent. Which is a thing. It's identity. Yeah. I'm saying I'm a fat too though. You're not a fat broad. You're not no divergent. Just annoying.

All right. Well, uh, there's certainly a lot of self diagnosing going on, you know, I'm neuro divergent. Tiny tiny bit of knowledge is a fucking very dangerous thing. Wow, you're fat too. Is that part of the neuro divergence? No, what? What do you mean? I don't know how to answer that. No, but I was saying that I have OCD.

Is that why you're so fat? What? Obsessive consumption to serve. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Oh, don't forget, pop, pop's culture, I didn't pick it up. I gotta pick it up tomorrow. Russians don't have souls, what? I don't know, that guy's. Uh, yeah, all right, okay, goodbye everyone. All right, see you, thank you.

Yeah, all right. Okay. Goodbye, everyone. All right. See you. Thank you.