The Dick Show - Episode 378 - Dick on Big Magnets

Episode Date: October 2, 2023

The Biggest Problem live show aftermath, a woman thinks there are giant magnets at Target that stop the shopping carts, white people are mosquitos, more immigrants are going to NYC, Mint Salad is on talking about Riley's warehouse adventure, Vito argues about juice cocktails, and Sean is sick; all this week on The Dick Show!

You sound rough today, Vito. What? I have a, I'm a bit of a sore throat, I think. You were already to party last night when we got home, and you're like, so am I coming in? Are we keeping this going? I said, no, we're going to, I'm going to bed, man. Get out of here. I don't, I would not characterize it that way.

How would you characterize it? I would characterize it as like, alright, we're good, right? You know, then I had it off. I wasn't trying to party more. Vito, you were itching to party. You were fiending for it. No, no, I just didn't know if it was polite to come inside and say hi to the dog or something.

I don't know. Yeah, you got to say, if the dog doesn't get a high, she gets really offended. I don't know, I don't know how to end social situations, you know. I guess I just get out of the car, say nothing and walk away. Yeah. Perfect. Yeah, perfect.

That's ideal. That's an ideal ending. Pretty good at ending it. Do you go to a party and say goodbye to every single person? No, no, no. You just, what is it? Irish goodbye? Did you sleep?

I mean, I tried to say, I don't do an Irish goodbye. I'll say, I'll say it to a couple people. Yeah. I'll do a loud one, you know, to like the group. Where are you? I'm leaving. Someone's gonna have to shut my girlfriend up, talking up there. Do you hear that?

Yeah, yeah. Perhaps, nigga, perhaps you can close the door. Or did you leave it open on purpose as a niggle? Yes. Oh, fucking close it. Thank you, nigga. You can put the mic down to close the door. What, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what All right, um, wow, what a show. There's a new cast here.

Sean has the flu. Sean has picked the worst week to have the flu. I know. He missed a good time. Oh my God. You got me. We've got Kevin, the engineer, not an audio engineer, although you've just informed me before the show

that you're not even an engineer anymore. Although I don't think you can stop being an engineer. Any more than you can stop being a, it's really like a mindset, right? Yeah. As long as you're building engines. Like if I were to take something and put it slightly ajar,

if I were to take this, for example, this coaster and place it on this table and then slightly put it a skew like that. Something in you would be very aggravated by that is I am aggravated by that. So I'm forced to keep everything in complete disarray. There's no middle ground and it's not, it can't be almost nice. It's got to just be totally destroyed. There's no, all or nothing.

Yeah, for sure. Yeah, so you are still technically an engineer. Awesome. Right? I'll take it. Yeah. I'll take it. I'll take it. I feel like you're like Bruce Willis in the fifth element. How do you have so much fucking pep in your step after last night?

Because it's the greatest week of my life. People are melting down. Famous people are having arguments about me without me even being there. There are tens of thousands of people right now, crawling over live streams for imaginary illegal things that they've think I've said, and filling the comments with nothing but calls for my death

and execution and denouncement and excommunication from, I guess, comedy and life in general, saying that I need to be shot, that they wish they could shoot me going over various Methods of torture they can't even calling me a pedophile isn't even enough to say their bloodlust for me And it is it just feels like a continual Blowjob that's never been a height tighter hotter. It feels like a blowjob where the woman is changing every couple of seconds Every comment is like change change Suck set change change

She quite a killed I hate dick. I fucking hate him. I gotta kill him. Let's kill him. It's fucking dismember him I fucking should never be friends with dick. He's a total shit back dick. Well his name is fitting It's not my real name you fucking idiot I picked the name cuz to be a jerk and you have internalized it as real Do you understand that my fantasy has become your reality? Do you know the kind of power I have? I got your gym. I've got the other gym and now your god is falling from the sky because he has no more gym powers is falling from the sky because he has no more gym powers oh shit I had the wrong board oh there we go what a week Yeah Welcome to the UK you want to get into the Glebe, you love the Gs. Got it

So show wherever's the contest coming alive from mountain bunk deep in the hottest city of failure I mean how stick masters in joining me for this time. How many times have you been here? I don't know four or five Kevin the engineer five. Yeah, Kevin the engineer Thank you so much for filling in for Sean. Certainly. Sean, he was the flu. Couldn't make it. I don't even know if he's got COVID, if he's ever had COVID to tell you the truth

of all the people who deserve to get COVID. Do you think he was faking it? His sickness? Yeah. Man, he missed an amazing live show and he loves live shows, so no. Yeah, he was. It was fun.

I don't think Sean's ever faked anything in his life. Did he get a, does he know he has the flu? How does he know he doesn't have COVID? What's the difference? What's that? The niggler also in studio from the, from the biggest problem. You weren't the live show too and you really niggled the shit out of me. Yes, sir. I mean, yes, sir! from the biggest problem you are at the live show too and you really niggled the shit out of me yes sir uh... i mean

yes sir yeah uh... the niggler who niggles you that's his evil power uh... they started everything was fun and games until they started chanting niggler in the middle of the town town hollywood and i thought oh this is bad this is kind of stop one black eyed walking by just poked head and he was,

what the fuck they chanting in there? We're like, no, that's a different thing. Guys, forgot your hoods. It's a slight annoyance. It's a slight persistent annoyance. It's a real word. You're always in trouble when you have to tell someone, no, that's a real word.

Yeah. How did you feel that the show went? I think it went great. I got a lot of laughs. Yeah, sure did. Oh, it was great. I got a lot of laughs. Yeah sure did. Oh it was awesome. You were doing your routine and I don't really remember exactly what your routine was but you were reading these index cards. Yeah. And you were going through them like in a funny way. So I said well what is like these blank cards? These what an else. These must be blank cards. So I picked up one of the

cards and it said you are gay. Yeah. Yeah. And then I picked up another of the cards and it said, you are gay. Yeah. Yeah. And then I picked up another one and it said, queer. And then I realized that you had written these jokes on every single index card, just in case, just in case I was to pick one up. You're a teen.

I thought this man is a criminal mastermind. Well, you're niggling mastermind. I got, I got niggles onmind. Well, niggling mastermind. He's been doing it for so many decades and I'm... I got niggles on niggles on fucking niggles, man. Conception, sort of recursive niggling. I think there's a limit to how many times we can say niggle. It was gonna say. Yeah, it's a real word, okay?

It does nothing else that describes what you're doing. No. Yeah, there's no other possible word. There's not a vixacious. A vixation. A vixation. A minor annoyance. Everything summed up in one word.

Vito. Yes. How did you feel that the show went? I think it, it was pretty good. Pretty good. Let me go to Mint first. Mint salad. Hello.

Beautiful Mint salad. This is very difficult for me to look at anything but your tits right now. What would you describe this that you were wearing? I do that. What would you describe this or your rings I can look at or body? Like, oh, I'm just, you know, I'm commenting on that. Your outfits so I can look.

What are you wearing? Can you describe it to the people? It is, I'd say it is a body suit where my tits are exposed on either side, only carried by one thin strap that's going connected to my neck. So my tits are falling out on either side. Not convinced in my ass is completely exposed. And I didn't wear a skirt or anything.

So last night, so it it's just my ass is hanging out. Also I like you're seeing way too close to Vito for the sounds he's making. He's leaning in for no reason even though it's radio. He's like leaning toward you. Oh no I got to be on camera. I want to be on camera. They came in here and Vito sat on the other side of you with the side that's closer to the camera. What are you switching thinking? We switched, I switched. Yeah. I mean, he's bigger. I am bigger and so I need to be more to the side.

Yeah. How's your tips of the sim? You recently had that very famous Star Wars rant. Yes, that one. What did it get? 20 million views? Yeah, 20 point. I don't know.

Last time I checked it was 20 point five million views. 25. Did I get a amount of Twitter followers. I got like 20.6, current 20.6K is what I'm at right now. Yeah, that's a lot. 20.6, you'll be past Vito. Past Vito in no time.

What am I, 20? I'm a Twitter, you're a Twitter's dog shit. I'm not giving us the kind of content, minskiving. Oh, I'm sorry, I'll pull my tits up, talk about Star Wars. I already do that. That's already my thing. She's still doing daily because I don't want to go over you, Vito. What are you doing daily right now? Daily movie reviews. Okay. And that's like a short movie review. Is it a video? Movie review? It's a video movie review. I do different outfits for each movie depending on the movie. How do you tell me to watch a movie every day?

A movie is too long. How do I fucking fucking Twitter man over here? 12 hours on Twitter every day. How do you have to defend your time to watch a movie? A single movie every day. No, man. Movies are, and then recorder review. It takes to, you're going to run out of that autistic energy eventually. I'm 20

I'm 22 I have this entire decade don't let people like veto drag you down Yeah, they're level Put out laziness piece of content a month. That's the way to do it. Okay, veto. I want a month I can't do just one a month or else people are gonna forget that I exist Okay, nobody can forget I hate me too much. I hate you. That's the power. That's the real power.

Oh God, I was just, I was jacking off reading some of these comments on, I went on, I mean, it's been a, it's just been a week of total chaos in Mayhem. It's, it's been incredible. See what's crazy about this is like you would think you had done something significant. Like, did you hear Dick Masterson stabbed a man? Yeah. Did you hear he kicked the... I stabbed him right in his business.

Yeah. I stabbed Eric July, right? I cut his business as jugular. No, he told a black man he's a bad businessman and a man. A bad writer and a bad writer. He's maliciously trying to destroy Eric's business. Yes, his business is making comics and this comics are terrible, do not buy them.

That is yes, that is, that's destroying his business. There's not really anything I can do. I mean, what do you mean he's saying no? He's not gonna get better. He doesn't have the ability to get better. So yes, I'm telling everyone not to buy his fucking comics. That's destroying his business. I'm directly trying to do that.

You know what I'm going down this line of like, I mean, so there's the internet unspoken rule of like, you know, don't go after somebody sponsors, you know, because they might lose their money. Or like, don't, you know, go after the channel because they might lose their money. And now it's gone to the point where like, don't criticize anything they've ever done or said

or any product they make, because then they might make less money. You're trying to take food out of here, kids' mouths. Yeah, I am. Yeah. I'm trying to put back in the kids' mouths of these idiots, spending $1,000. Don't shoot any culture war comics. He might sell less comic books if you tell people they're bad. How could you do that?

Why doesn't he make good comics? How come nobody just takes away from that? You know, if his comics were good, people would be making fun of me for making fun of the fucking comic Riley if you didn't know if you're sleeping under a rock Riley employed a show employee the month has showed up at Eric Chalice warehouse Eric Chalice de false DMCA claimed Riley's web store yeah ruining ruining his business ironically he sent Riley a DMCA takedown, destroyed his store, and on a DMCA takedown request was his warehouse's address.

So Riley went to his address and taped $50 to his front door and was goofing around. He went to his warehouse as I get an industrial business park, right? Everybody across America knows empty parking lot. Big empty parking lot with a bunch of warehouse is where they sell vitamins and supplements and film pornography, right? Everybody across America knows empty parking lot. Big empty parking lot with a bunch of warehouse is where they sell vitamins and supplements and film pornography, right? That's what happens in those fucking industrial parks, right? Yes. You might find one with a batting cage every once in a while, but otherwise it's

just a storage for rich douchebags. So Riley goes there, knocks on the door, nobody shows up, goes back and he tapes some $20 bills to the front door of saying that they're IRL superchats. And then making a bunch of dumb videos where he's flipping off the camera and stuff, funny stuff. It's like a tiny fraction of what Alex Stein does, right? It's such an inconsequential goof that it's not even worth it. It's like, oh, that's kind of funny, I guess.

I thought it was just be a big waste of time. I think that's cute, but I don't worth it. It's like, oh, that's kind of funny, I guess. And I thought it was just be a big waste of time. I think that's cute, but I don't get it. Sure enough, I sure didn't get it because Archlie has gone on a week long meltdown about it, gibbering, jabbering, like a lunatic, calling people enwards, left and right, telling a Nick going on Nick Rikatus show and saying that he's going to aerate Riley, that he's going to get a bunch of hard crack pipe hitting guys, just thugs to show up and do horrible,

unspeakable things to Riley for violating criminal mischief, misdemeanor and codes and the Texas penal code. It's been shocking and he's still going. Did he's made multiple? He put Nick Brickada on a black list. He's trying to black list Nick Brickada on a black list. He's trying to blacklist Nick Brickada the nicest guy Most entertaining guy in the world who has only defended him who has totally been hands up and all this Money like Nick Brickada has told him look man. I want you to make money

But you're not allowed to kill Riley because you taped dollar bills to your door Yeah, he's like why you trying to destroy my business? He's like, I'm not trying to show your business. Just, you cannot kill a man for showing up to your empty industrial business park and making a joke video in the parking lot. Like, you just can't do that. You gotta don't know to stay in what I'm dealing with. I'm asking people to come to my house, bro.

I understand more than you, what you're dealing with. I have a capacity to understand, there is no possible way possible way Eric that I could Understand things at your level. Everything that is possible to comprehend or understand I understand I understand In a more complex and more comprehensive manner than you because you are a sub IQ Retard you probably have like an IQ of 83 or 85. It's impossible for me to understand anything at your level. It will always be higher and more sophisticated.

Well Dick is impossible. You don't understand because you don't have 12 employees. Which is the Eric's go to. You could never understand what it's like to be a business owner with 12 employees. Anyway, let me put on the shaft theme song before you start him. It's pretty Eric.

Ethan Ralph came up with the greatest bid in the world, which is just putting black exploitation, music, under Eric July talking. And for some reason, it's just, it's fucking hilarious every time. Is it playing? No, I forgot. I forgot to get it going.

I forgot to get it going. Well, yeah, his go-to is next like, well, you can't kill a guy for showing him your business bargain He's like well neck. I have 12 employees. I'm like what doesn't change the lawn any meaningful way I don't I have a voice who I have a duty to From this madman and his giant novelty He just show me he's gonna shave me next he could shave him

He might shave my social media manager Fuck live operator I got my shape my forklift What it is is what it is is that I was trying to contend with in the pronunciation of my Astakation of the invent Nicholas you understand. Okay, we keep it. Okay, we keep it. Okay, miss do mr. Rikita a man shows up But he says he's gonna shave you and all your children. What can you do? What?

That's what I learned on the street. That's what I learned from. I got my shirt out. I'm the guy I have for this year. School of man shaped my knee. I never recovered. My scholarship was showing. never got what my scholarship was showing but the business of my scholarship

business was destroyed uh... i have i have footage of arachialized knee hitting uh... the end uh... here we go let me pull it up right here oh my god here's here's footage of arach uh... who's very homophobic and calls people gay all the time and is worried about, he does, I've heard footage of him saying that he doesn't want to

talk to gay guys because he's afraid that they might want to have sex with him. He's one of those types of homophobic. He has clashes homophobic. He's like, real? Like, how cool is that? I just don't want to share a bathroom seat with him. You know what I mean? Wow. They're not thinking that. just don't want to share a bathroom seat with them. You know, they're not thinking that. I don't know.

He's so homophobic. He won't even spell the word gay right. If you tell that so much more than you'll kind of gay yourself, you got to spell it in a creative, antiferous manner. I don't want them finding me. Okay, so here is some footage that footage that's a uh... a dickhead uh... journalist an independent journalist who works for the tds uh... bpi to you uh... news network yes what i'm covered independent journalist uncovered this uh... footage of it

eric uh... driving away the home home homosexual demons in him i guess showing us how to dance like a straight man. I was buggy This is Eric flashing gang signs to the camera Uh-huh, okay, let's go come on Eric show it show the day Very straight moving hips Get a serve Riley and Riley comes back Put them in a self-defense situation Dance off this is what you meant by step up

Oh look at those wrists Eric oh yeah Eric just came out of the warehouse and done this Riley would have been shot Eric we've got you got to break out those old dance moves Riley's back and this time he's got Frank Hassel and Ralph I guess I must to protect my Like a gay Michael Jackson look at this look at these moves Oh It's like a gay Michael Jackson look at these boots

When did you stop our cowboy head? That's what I want to know is this guy like that felony? Is this an internet felony what I'm happening? What's happening right now? Yeah, is this how we earn that that felony? He killed a man by dancing now is this how we earn that that felony killed a man by dancing dance and stepping up on whoo whoo whoo whoo he can't dance from his day dance move haha haha haha oh my god the toughest man

comics everybody he's like a gay nasex right that's like in his moves he's got one more nasex haha can I also comment on the ridiculousness of the idea that this is all coming from the comic book space? I think if he was like a rapper or like a clothing designer or something, but the idea

you come into comics, the most white, nerdy, stupid space, and you go, well, I just can't take any disrespect. For me, my comic books about guys and tech latex outfits. Chris and Vix is on their tongues. Comics are gay, Eric, you're in like the gay space. You are gay. I've seen a lot of gay men dance. You are gay. I don't know how to break this. I don't break this to your wife, but you like, you need to dick up your ass to hear these dance moves. I know the mating calls of gay men. I go to a lot of gay raves.

I know exactly what this looks like. I could survey the whole area like the terminator go, gay, gay, gay, straight, gay, gay, gay, straight, straight. I am so glad that this man has defended his business park against Riley the greatest villain of our modern time. We got him learn these moves, me and you. I do them together. I'll say that. I don't think I have enough homosexual energy to do this and I have had sex with men.

So, I am just a gayer than any dick I've ever sucked. Oh, okay. Fantastic. Very good. Well, it's like, what's that voiceover on the clip? They just put it on to make it like, seem like he's doing something that the guy's not explaining like a fuck you old man kind of thing. Let's put out this old man talking about guys dancing brother's dancing

gay and then we're gonna dance to it and show him what it that we don't care what it is that it is he's saying. Well he's got some he's got some sick moves. I don't know why he wants to resort to violence when he's clearly learned how to battle dance his way out of any situation. Can you imagine how embarrassed I would be if he challenged me to a dance off. You'd lose instantly. Yeah. I would lose. Mexicans can't dance. I can't refuse. So you blew, I mean, you fucked that up, Eric. If you were hiding gay moves like these, you should have instantly challenged me to a dance off.

Yeah. What have been over and done with? You should have only played to his strengths. I don't know why he's not. What strengths? The dance. The dance. Bigler, are you fucking seriously asking why I'm, take a guess.

Give me a top three, what strength? I can't do much fucking better than that. Oh my god. All right, prove it. Why don't you out? I can't. I don't want to dox myself. Yeah.

I do it all the time. It's just one of my loan. The big alert is incredible, Dancer. Get the turturalized according to lore. I'd come out, Dancer, like Swavicito or something. Right? Why do we have some little salsa moves? Yeah, I was gonna say that gay is internet fight. Anybody's ever seen?

Why do we have to pretend to respect this guy? I don't get it. Why is that like required by everyone on the internet? Because all these white guys are, I don't know. There are hopes and dreams on this one guy. Yeah, because Eric is like, he's like a token black character in their universe. So they need him to just the same way that Marvel needs there.

I mean, ironically, that's the why. It drives me insane. They talk to him like he's a child. Like they infantilize him when they speak to him. It's so degrading. I just, they're all like, you have to respect him. And I'm like, well, no, I don't, because I don't respect bad art,

and he makes very bad art. Yeah, but you have to respect that he has a business. I'm like, lots of people have businesses. Like, what do you talk? But you have to respect that he employs people. I'm like, I don't know, the local fucking pizza had employees like 10 people. Do I gotta go in there and go,

thank you for your service. Like God bless your fucking heart. I'm trying to destroy the local fucking pizza had employees like 10 people, do I gotta go in there and go, thank you for your service. Like God bless your fucking heart. I'm trying to destroy the banking industry every day. Okay, that's, I give that makes me a bad guy, I give to you guys, then, sorry. And him and all these other guys, let's be clear,

their entire business and whatever else is built on disrespect. His own business is built on disrespect. In his own comic, there's like a prelude where he's like, the modern comic industry is bullshit. Like we've seen how they've hurt their customers. I'm like, yeah, so he doesn't respect all sorts of industries and he's monetizing that.

But like for some reason, everyone has to go, oh, if you don't respect him, you're a bad person. You have to respect him. make sure he makes plenty of money Make sure his employees are fat and happy no one owes him that Especially when he makes a shitty comic if he made a good comic you would have an argument to be like you're just being mean Well, I don't make fun of Ethan van Cyber his books grow his books great cyber fog 3 is awesome his books great cyber fog three is awesome I love cyber frog oh man uncle Ethan has the best comic book what do you love that cyber frog the most first of all have you seen the arts have you seen how I

haven't detailed it is it's like a it's like berserk but like you know Ethan Benzkiver doing it. That is so easy. The fuck is Bizzirk? Bizzirk's a Japanese cop. Is that with a horse rapes that girl? Is that that anime? Yeah, well, the horse technically didn't get to raper. Yeah. Which is the tip? What are you?

No, it got its head cut off. Before the raper began? Before the raper began? Yeah. Wait, was that during the clips? No, it's before the horse clips. Gonna raper, I don't remember that part. I just just seen it in Emmett's. Might not have the clips? No, it's under the horse clips. Gonna rape her, I don't remember that part. I just just seen it in Emmett's mind out of the horse going like,

ah! The horse got possessed by demons or what, I just fucking, I'm a rapist. Yeah. The main guy gets raped. Yeah. That guy with that sword. He gets raped?

Yeah, as a kid. What the fuck? Oh, okay. Everyone else except Bito. What the fuck is in this comic for you guys, right? It's not about the story. So it's is in this comic for you guys? Right. It's not about the story. It's a lolly comic.

Everybody's going nuts over lolly comic. Well, like, yeah, it's, you know, him as a young soldier gets like, raped a punch. He gets raped by a father figure. And then eventually he goes, he goes, hey, this is a bad dad. I don't like this dad.

When it kills his dad. Wow. Do you think Eric sees me as a father? Archie lie, do you think? Well, I kind of think he does. That's why he's so angry. I think all these guys who don't have fathers are definitely searching for some sort of father.

I think Eric's lies. Okay. I'm not gonna play armchair psychologist, but I'm gonna play armchair psychologist. Okay. Eric's like clearly has some sort of father issues that lead him to be like, I must have the respect I did not get from a father figure in my life.

I took him from the wider community and I will stop it no end to achieve it. Like blacklisting, trying to blacklist Nick and into a whisper network. Or just the honest is just fine for everybody. I got a big problem with this guy. One of the biggest problems in the universe. Right. Honestly, though, is like, wait a minute, Mint's addressing her tits. Yeah, I got it.

Can you imagine if a woman looking like the way you look was talking about my comic like that or your comic, you'll never have that. Ethan Van Siver has such a wonderful thing. I'm gonna ask cosplayers. It's gonna be great. I mean, men. I do have a male cosplayer. I don't get some female ones. Men's gonna dress up as some super killer stuff at some point.

Are there any sexy ones that show my tits? Yeah, you can have it. We'll have a sexy one. Will. The main character's sexy, but she's kind of covered up. But like, sometimes she takes it off. Here's a guy dressed that came to the live show, dressed as Vito's.

That's my son. My son's super killer. I was gonna say, especially in the black community, this quest for respect. Oh, I destroyed many young black men. You see it all the time where they're like, I feel insulted. Could someone wider than Vito talk about the black community

for a second? Yeah. Yeah, you act feel insulted let me step in the result it let me resort to violence it is like a bad stereotype that the young ripper is immediately playing into where it's like uh-huh I'm playing a little joke on you and you can't even yeah I'm gonna ventilate you okay buddy me as a white man I would go well

I can't expect everyone to respect me so i accept your trolling and uh... that would disturbs me i will move on with my life i think the african american community it's more like no this is a place to pause and demand respect this is a teaching moment for everyone else yes and asking erick's unrealistic expectation that everyone must respect him and the wider community for some reason backing up that insane expectation.

Yeah. Like when if the community, guys, if you want to help Eric July and you want his company to succeed, all of you need to sit him down and go, you will never have 100% total respect for what you're doing. And you should not want it. Yeah. If everyone respected you, that would mean you're doing and you should not want it. Yeah. If everyone respected you, that would mean they're lying to you. Uh, yeah, they are lying to you. Here's Riley's, uh, here's Riley's attack on Eric's business.

Yes. All right, Eric, ignore those super chats. You son of a bitch. Fuck her. Now in the background, he has three 20s taped, uh, taped. So there's not even any sticker in all of it. Three twenties or two twenties in a ton. Well, let's, I'll give you that one. It's free money.

It's free money. Here you go. And there's on his private business, Eric has the gigantic logo of his company printed on the side of secrets. Super secret private double dutch business. That's the back of his business apparently. Yeah. Nice. Even the back has a logo. Yeah. He said that, oh, that was actually the back of his business apparently. Yeah. Nice. Even the back has a logo. Yeah, he said that, oh, that was actually the back. He came in from the back where all the luck gates were because this is not public property. He describes things like an MCS, you're painting though.

It's like, well, okay. Yeah, then there's two gates. One gate to another gate. There's a driveway. The driveway turns upwards. And what it is from there, you can see the street. It is open to the street. What is your private business, Puketa?

So what you're saying is one gate is open for the public to get in there? I don't even know that there's any gates. Here you go. I don't think there is. He's drawing little bunnies on the 20s. I saw a lot of people saying he's going to federal prison for defacing curbs.

Yeah, it's a serious crime. Every time we go into the end cap libertarians, by the way, every time we go into those dollar bills, it's like stamped with learn more about Jesus. Like we saved our, I'm like, yep, that guy's in prison for stamping that on there. There he is committing his felonies. I can't believe you. You're like super chat, so I brought him 50 bucks. Does he not? Does he not?

He really walks. Does he even like, he's like, Oh, I'm death third. Not threatening at all. Well, there he is. All right. Did he not understand that he just filmed himself committing an act of breaking and entering for which the Texas Penal Code prescribes 20 to 30 years in prison.

The tax opinus code. To the amount of fucking armchair Texas lawyers who have suddenly appeared out of nowhere to inform us just how many different laws were broken by taping a $20 bill to a guy's door. You know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, I learned about 50 new black words for getting shot this week.

Oh, nice. I will say area, it's a pretty good one. It might steal that shot. I actually had no idea castle doctrine extended so far away from the building, right? If they, it's anywhere on earth. Yeah. If someone threatens your business, you could shoot up in the air at them. You could book them.

Yeah. If you have a laser gun or something, you could loop it around and hit them. A man's small business park is his castle wait i have a tweet i have it something about that hold on self-defense the human right uh... uh... man how do you feel knowing that riley came back close to death uh... well is that he wrote it do you think at all is it a turn on the day is it's it's a criminal it's hilarious

honestly also i should mention that like like the drive up to the actual warehouse We didn't we almost didn't see it because of like how like it's on the side Yeah, and then like oh then there's a giant SD Cal there like what the fuck would you have? So you almost didn't know where it was but there was a giant sign on the building indicating where it was Are you sure you want to confess to this level of criminality? I mean, that's a private logo. That might be copyright theft, what you're doing is given some memory. Even by having it into your brain. I also think he's lying about the amount of gates. So there's like, Jesus, look at those fucking tits. Oh my God. So there's like a curve, right? So like a curve on the road. So there's like the first one that's actually- What's that comes look like? I don't know, like that, it's a curve.

It's a curve. It curves from a bit to the left. So the first driveway is not gated at all. And there's a business, there's a business that's there, and then- Is it a private business, or is it a public business? You might not want to reference it if it's a private business.

It's public. Like I'm not going to say the name, but it's a business there. That people like, you know, they get the work there. And then there's like the ripover, ripover thing right there. And it's like, it's like, okay, how could this possibly be private? Man, this admission of criminality discusses, discusses the jail. Discusses discuss There are 12 families that you and your idiot boyfriend I can't win. Oh man, like I don't know how to employ people I hire two editors I understand what it's like to hire people You should

Epiphyze with the idea that Riley with his giant novelty scissors I'm going to get a million. I'm going to get a million. I'm going to get a million. I'm going to get a million. I'm going to get a million. I'm going to get a million. I'm going to get a million. I'm going to get a million.

I'm going to get a million. I'm going to get a million. I'm going to get a million. I'm going to get a million. I'm going to get a million. I'm going to get a million. I tried to draw his like John Madden while he's describing it to Nick. Well, you see there's three trees on the right and then behind that There is a gate mechanism with a latch that When he did that there's normally not a guard, but sometimes a man named Simon is near the gate and he'll say hi But if he says hi

That means he wants you to go around and there's a blue box. It's like the box is three. What it is and the riddle of the pay. Now, we can need to answer the riddle. The riddle is private. The riddle is private. You must go, but you can answer it. The riddle man dot, if you are up and this three answers,

or you can, there's a series of lights. When you set up a, if you take up a red flag and move it slightly But there is a bird in the sky That means that the yellow light is now open for a minute And then once you pass through that gate There will be a man wearing a hat If the hat is slightly open that means that we are close for the day Wow, it's a private business Amazing Close for the day. Wow, it's a private business. That's amazing.

The only thing I can really think of, there's like some parking spots that says like RIPA verse, like on the... Did you park in the reserve, RIPA verse parking? I didn't want to be disrespectful. Oh shit, so you might have actually broken the law by parking in a non, did it say reserve for the young RIPA himself? I think it really did. He has a reserve parking spot at his warehouse.

What a cock. What the ego on a giant industrial parking lot to draw out your fucking head, honcho parking. He has a reserve parking spot. What a what a Michael Scott black Michael Scott. Yeah, always gigantic empty parking lot. So the employees who actually do the work there of standing around looking at comics that aren't selling, show up and I'm like,

I can't park in air. Because there's nothing to do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do.

I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do.

I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do. saying why is it higher security for I don't know why with a gun so yeah okay so basically the first day that we were there there is no arm security and then we were there for like four hours each day and so the second day that we were there there was like two guys standing there just like I know just like standing each other off probably and like in front of the building yeah they're just having a gale orgy over there Yeah, and then like

Kissin and Rubin and yeah, it was pretty erotic Drining their crucifix cocks together Eric would not appreciate it I mean it turned on and like want to shun in the way so Riley was like they're just like you know it took a video of it Yeah, whatever and it's just like Why didn't they shoot him? I don't get it. They, then they have shot him.

They were too busy shooting off for other guns. Yeah. In their mouth. They're too busy training to shoot intruders. Yes. So just to be clear, Eric, I made what, like a 10 minute video explaining

how he has to take this threat deadly serious. Yeah. And that the life of himself and his employees is now. He holds, that's the weirdest part. Employees and their families. Yeah, here's the other thing. If I was one of Arachialized employees, they'd be like, motherfucker, don't infantilize me

and tell me like you're personally responsible. You're not raising my family. Yeah, I'm raising my family. Don't take credit for my fucking family. You pay me to be here. You pay me to be here. From a wild gunman or whatever, you yelled at a fat gunman or whatever. Yeah.

You yelled at a fat guy on the internet. And your dancing is gay. Yeah. His own employees is like little tools as if they're like fucking children who like, it's almost like he used a charity to do the same thing. Yeah. And then he got, yeah, he went on Nick's dream and confessed. Yeah.

Oh, that was this is the clip of a fucking live time. Eric went on Nick, recated stream. And Nick begged him not to talk about the charity. So he said, I'll answer, of course, before Nick even finished his sentence, because I'll answer anything you want me to. Wait a minute. I don't want you to make me ask this question.

I'll answer anything you want me to say. I have got ages for days. Anything you want to know about my charity, if you really don't need me, I'll ask him. I'll tell you. I will tell you. So Nick said, how much did it,

you charged $17 for the charity comics? Did it cost you $17 to ship the, to provide, to ship the comics to the charity? No. No. That's like, no, it costed about $13 what it is. What it is is when we do it in bulk, it costs about about $13 what it is. What it is is when we do it in bulk, it costs about, and Nick just goes, oh, it was a

15, it was 13 or 15 all over the place. Yeah. Well, buddy. And, yeah, when you take, if you're telling me, no one likes dick being right, you know, that's the thing I've learned over my life. My dad hated it when I was a kid. Adult man, dad's all across the country, still hate it to this day.

But I'm afraid once again, I think this charity thing is gonna bite air to lie in the ass. It's like a can of, and again, he could have just ignored all this. Because honestly, like, you've said he fucked around with this charity and I kinda like understand, I'm like, yeah, like, my couch is, civilization on it. Yeah, it's in charity.

But it was mostly like, well, that's a chapter that's been closed. We're not going to reopen that. And said he goes, I got to get on that Nicaraka and it's not everybody. He's fucking around with charity. No, you know, he's not something he wanted to do. He's going to be great if you get that for me. We got a lot of messages where they're like, if the things that Eric July are saying about his charity are true, this is very, very bad and potentially it's gonna get him in trouble. Uh-huh.

Okay, I'll see. I don't know anything about charity law. I'm hoping that we, at some point, can talk to the other. I mean, the law, the law conforms to what we perceive as morality collectively. Yeah. And I have a pretty, because I had to learn it from scratch, it's not in me.

I have a pretty good understanding of what collective morality is. Right. And I will say that what he's doing violates that. So it's, probably, probably, making even one dollar off of charity is bad. Yeah. I think the best metaphor that has come out of it is when you have a bake sale, you sell cookies and give the money to charity. You don't take money and give cookies to charity because that's Maranna.

And then we go, look at how much I helped charity. I gave them all these cookies. I mean, there are people that got to eat. That's irrelevant. Look at all the I helped you. I gave them all these cookies. I mean, they're people that got it. Money did you get? That's irrelevant. Look at all the cookies we gave them. And they're like, well, I feel like you did it backwards. I feel like this is not a good charity. Yeah, it's really a shame.

Dexter Inaroot is cookie business. Yeah, exactly. Can you respect this man's cookie business? You already took to make those cookies. I'm like, well, I'm sure the kids like cookies. I mean, you might have a point there, but. But are they good cookies? I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars.

I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars. I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars. I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars. I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars. I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars. I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars. I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars. I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars.

I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars. I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars. I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars. I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars. I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars. I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars. I feel like if you made several from thousand dollars. I feel like if you made several from thousand kids. I can't even donate my shit to the city. But the cookie's gonna individually wrapped with different wrappers. Yeah.

Yeah. And there's a special one where you can buy them all in a box. Nick was fucking with me. He's like, well, how do you know how much it cost to ship the comics? I'm like, are you fucking retarded? It's one pallet of kayak came wrapped from China. There's and labor involved for a second one of bugs

dude when he started saying like what is it cost to ship the comic and airs like well you know there's the labor involved in the one i'm like what boxes on a pallet wrapped it up it's like two hours of work a lot of labor it comes wrapped from china it comes in giant pallets. You don't do anything.

I'm not even able to unwrap a pallet. Okay, what else do I have here? Are we done talking about it? Yeah, did we talk about it enough? We might be done for today. We got the live show. No, stuff that I want to show, this amazing moment from the live show.

Don't forget to watch the live show. I was talking to my girlfriend, and she goes, the best line from the show was when you said, can you imagine if we treated Maddox the same way we treat veto like. Can you imagine if Maddox ever had to take the amount of shit that veto takes from people and he would just I mean he would fuck you with me. Because you would want everyone to respect him and me I go, ah, your barbs me nothing. You give me $5 a month. You hit them back harder than they pay you.

I'm trying to find your district clown in the dunk tank is really upset every time you hit the bullseye. I'm gonna give a shit. Here's one of the best moments from the show in my opinion. Is this gonna open correctly? No, here my opinion. This is gonna open correctly. No, here we go. Yeah, there we go. This is you opening up the, is it the Voted Up segment?

This was the Voted Up segment, yeah. Voted Up! Yeah! Everybody likes this. All these internet shows are such trash. Like hack the movies and who are these podcasts That Tony is a clown and I think Carl has down But thankfully there's a podcast that's made just for me Fill the transpose, be a racism and massage. Shut me, I want to burn it up.

So go to big and problem. Don't show baby, I want to burn it up. If I don't, I'm going at the original song head. Well yeah. Yeah. As long as I can call out Tony and Carl. You got to say the chorus at the beginning. This little song called, I want to vote it up and then you start singing.

You got, I don't know what I'm about to do. I think people still would have missed it. Probably. Here's a guy who definitely missed it. Let me see. Okay, do you really need to play that one? What? What? Third?

We're getting late out. We're getting late out. Okay. Oh, yes. Okay, so I did not realize that guy was missing all day. And then you guys are watching footage and I'm like, who are they talking about? I'm like, oh, that guy.

What happened? Well, Bird was heckling early on in the show and then he vanished inexplicably right and then uh... uh... we went backstage here is bird posting hit the aftermath i don't i don't think these are staged but i saw the surveillance footage uh... the oh thank you that hot ass man oh my god that, that one manager at that theater.

Oh, they're good look. Well, it's her, I don't remember her name. I can't stock her. I don't know if she was give her where her name. I think it's Raven. Of course. I'm the whole name. I don't think we're supposed to give her name.

I mean, you immediately, there was, I mean, at least I had like, tonight ability because there was two of them. Now she knows I'm talking about her. Well, I mean, the other ones, whatever, they're all good looking. Can't even think of there. Oh, my God, I was thinking of them. Definitely. They're at the Deaf Noodles Comedy Club.

Grave has got all the employees, beautiful women to work behind the scenes. Definitely was like Charlie Angels. But Charlie's Angels. Situation going in. What the hell is, what is that? Why, how do you get that? Is it because he's so tall?

I don't know. They were good at their jobs too, because the show went really well. What the hell is it? What is that? Why? How do you get that? It's a good job. They're good at their jobs too, because the show went really well. One of them was running the boards for us. Yeah, they're running the boards. Mark competent than this guy, or even Sean probably helped fix our audio issues during the show. Asking us if we want Red Bull.

It's like, what is? Yeah, we got compliments. He's adorable. You guys know how much I pay to get compliments like this at the strip. They're really wine. And to get it from free here. I'm not gonna lie. I forget who he was even talking about

as soon as you bring her up. This is, she came over and she's like, oh, you gotta see this, that guy got tossed out because he was too drunk. And I thought, I was thinking of the usuals in my head who might have gotten kicked out. And then she goes here and I said, bird, bird was the last guy I would have thought got kicked out.

And she goes, yeah, he's outside and he starts fumbling around, rams his head into the glass window of the comedy club and then falls down. And this is her quote exactly, falls down like Peter Griffin and family guy like. Oh. She was burned to a mortgage. Check this out on the security gear and he's like Wham I saw you guys watching it. I asked her to send it to me about you name get it yet

Let me just give you my number and then you can send it to me. I was like I've heard this one before I heard that one he tripped on the sign outside That's what I was did you put that up on the screen the What I already put it up. I don't know if people said. Yeah, he's looking good. I cut a second angle because I was naked in the bushes. What? Did Trixie escort?

Oh, yeah, wait, tell it. You were naked and so the niggler comes in. I give him almost barely any instructions. He's running late and I said, you know what? Just break up, there's a microphone backstage. I told them you're coming. They don't, it's not Texas, so you don't have to worry about being aerated if the strange man shows up on a private theater.

Big hand on his face. I didn't know you were gonna have that. I'm like, what are you gonna do? It was amazing. He's gonna come back there. I said, just interrupt, interrupt the problems in the middle after the second one. And I had even, I have so little faith in people that I just assumed, well, he's going to, he's going to screw it up. There's

no way that will work. I had forgotten about it totally when I started my second problem. And then he starts giggling in the background. Well, you're going to be, I forgot about it. That's a very good comic timing. But you had to change outside. Outside in the bushes. Wait, why? Riley was pranking him. Yeah, you know, Riley told you there's no where to change. You got to do it outside.

Yeah, I get into the front and there's no way to get into the green room because like I've got a giant backpack and I have to walk in front of you guys. And I'm like, Riley's just like, just fucking, get outside and just, errr, errr, errr. Oh, oh, oh, oh, okay, okay. So I go outside and I'm getting naked in the bushes.

No idea there's an entrance back there. Wait, you didn't, so what were you gonna do? I was gonna, I was fearing that as I went. Uh-huh. Thankfully, definitely was out there and he got help to get him. Yeah. There, there's the costume. Look at that, guys. Uh, the niggler in the flesh. What a handsome man. So good. That was great. You a green coat with ends all over it. How did you feel about, but there were ends on there. There's some ends on there.

Oh, you scratched them in. Yeah, of course. Yeah, it's good. How did you feel about it? Was that your first comedy performance that you did there? Uh, no, I've done, I've done a bit of improv. Bit of community theater. You know, you just, you call that comedy.

No, not anymore. I can't fucking, I can't listen to any of that shit or go it whatever It's a good life. Listen to you, isn't it? Improv. You should take this character to the comedy seller. Oh yeah.

Where would Kramer go? Take it there. That was the laugh factor. That was the laugh factor. I'm gonna string you up and something something. Hey, 50 years ago, they'd have you up, Sit down with a fork up your ass. You a bunch on anyway.

He didn't say that. Said something close to that. No, he said N word N word. Look, we've got an N word. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're right. So how did you think it went? Awesome.

You're up there shaking like a leaf. You're like, oh, was I? No, I didn't see that. No, you were very calm. You were. No, everything was completely planned. Every, I had everything planned down to the small little stutter in between switching cards

and everything's completely stupid. All the stutters are planned out even. Then you were sticking posted notes. Everywhere that said I'm gay. Oh, yeah. The best part of it was when you started trying to do stick with him. And I'm like, please don't try to do improv with the niggler. We will be here all night.

And you're like, well, what about this? I'm like, just let him do the routine. I know the niggler. He will just pause and go. The routine I planned. Yeah, it was really great. Yeah, it really made the show I think it was a real we met all our heroes last night the niggler super killer

Yeah, it was there Riley in the cape so many delicious care. Oh in the best part you lost your way in yeah You gained weight. It's gonna be all right this month. I'm coming back Or as you have an entire You gained weight. That's gonna be all right. This month I'm coming back around. As you have an entire leader, just for the printberry.

I have a big court of, I have a huge sore throat from one of them. So drinking sugar will cure that in your, it goes, it feels better. Cranberry juice, my throat. That's like infamously bitter. No, juice is good for the throat, right? No, that's not juice, bro.

It is cocktail. Juice cocktail. It's sugar, it's a good. It's a sugar, it's a good. It's from concentrated? That's not juice, bro. It's cocktail. It's sugar. It's sugar, it's concentrate, isn't it? Hold on. So, it's a mix of calories, person. Yeah, you're supposed to, it's so packed full of sugar that you're supposed to mix it with alcohol.

It feels better in my throat. My throat feels better. Sure it does. It does. It's better than drinking like a, I don't know, a soda or something. Yeah, okay.

Have you considered drinking water? Water wouldn't help us with it. Why not? Drink more of it. Yeah, a little lemon in there. Here's the, let's see if I have some of these, some of these things, maybe. My mom wasn't town, so I want to take her

all the nice restaurants for a week. Oh, what did you think of the glitter gun I brought? You fucking asshole. Oh, you mean what I think about the $150 cleaning fee? When you asked me at the meetup, if it was okay, if you should, it was, first of all, yeah. It was obviously glitter looking at the tubes that you brought.

You asked me the night before, if it was okay to shoot confetti everywhere. And I said, you said, do you have to clean up? Because I have confetti to shoot everywhere. And I said, you know what, we could clean that up. And that sounds like in character, that would be very niggling if you did that. And then I turned around after you did it and it's fucking glitter. And I wanted to kill you.

And I also didn't even work. You didn't get it anywhere. You just kind of dumped it on the ground or no. So you just walked on stage and basically, so you do actually laugh like that. Another thing is to cost us a hundred bucks by dumping 100 and 60 and then here's the greatest, we go backstage and they're like,

well, how do we clean this up? And I said, do you have a vacuum? And deaf doodles goes, I have a roomba. He said, they don't have a vacuum. I'm not having a vacuum. I can drive do you have a vacuum? And deaf doodles goes, I have a roomba. He said, they don't have a vacuum. I'm not having a vacuum. It's like no, so. I can drive back tomorrow with a fucking vacuum. Ray, even you'll be here, right?

You can let me in. And I was just like, no, I'm not going to be here. I'm like, well, then I don't know what we're going to do. Does anyone of them have a, can I tell Dennis like, bro, just bring your vacuum. It'll take you like that. So they have a cleaning crew. But it doesn't need a whole,

is he really bringing a whole cleaning crew in for some glitter? I don't want to drive there and vacuum it. And he said he's already doing it. So they have a cleaning crew. But it doesn't need a whole, is he really bringing a whole cleaning crew in for some glitter? I don't want to drive there and vacuum it. And he said he's already doing it. He's doing a cleaning crew. I said, okay, just send me a bill for however much you think the glitter is of that. He's like, well, it's 140 bucks.

I'm like, okay, so I'm paying in tight. Yes. It's one little, all right. Yeah, I mean, that's fair. And they were going to clean a little bit anyway. You invited the beast in. We invited the beast in. You can't, you can't. They were going to clean a little bit anyway. You invited the beast in. We invited the beast in. You can't, you can't.

That's the Niggler's appearance fee. That's it. 140 bucks. I think it was worth it. I got a great bid. Here's a tub of glitter. I'm going to dump out. We're nobody can see it.

Behind the desk. If you watch the video, it's like, I was glitter there. I didn't notice. No, it was all in Dix hair. Glitters very dangerous, you know. People could lose an eye, really? Yeah, that's not, that exceeds niggling at that point. Well, that's why I didn't shoot in your face.

I think the netherglow is a folding into something worse. Okay, here's an update. Remember how I said, remember Maddox's video where he's going in on Justin Wang? Yes. Okay. Now to the netherglow he's breaking things. going in on Justin Wang. Yes. Oh, okay. Now, then it goes breaking things. Let me pull that up, Sue.

I can make my point visually. YouTube Maddox. He was in a TikTok. Yeah, yeah. Maddox was in a TikTok recently. Is he a TikTok star? He's in somebody else's TikTok. He's in somebody else's TikTok.

No, no, no, I'm showing off what he looks like. There's a manly internet. There's a manly internet. Okay, so this is, that's become a meme for some fucking reason. It's great. I did it because I have his gem. This is how big he is, right?

Now remember we said he's been working on this video for like five years. That's my, that's my, so that was Maddox five years ago, basically. Yes. And I didn't have proof of this until now. Uh, this is Maddox in a recent TikTok video. Look at the fucking size of him. He's got that belly button shirt. Oh my god. When guys get so fat that their shirt has a belly button. Yeah. See me, you can't even tell I have a belly button. But when you get so fat that you're stretching the shirt across your stomach, your shirt gets a belly button. You need a TC Tugger at that point, he needs a tugging knob on that shirt.

Exactly, here's Maddox participating in some cringe fest, some girls fucking cringe fest TikTok video. You give me a show that we're not. He did it. Oh, he's a beefy boy. That's sign eagle did not do anything. Oh, look at this. Oh, that's why would you just wear a black tee at that point? Why would you film yourself if you've gone, if you let yourself go? Is this incredible?

He's got black jeans and a black shirt. And a cookie monster. Yeah. He's nipple and pretty hard through that too. Yeah, nipple's protruding on TikTok. Very disrespected. He's a nipple. This is a look at this guy.

Oh man. Yeah. Duh-du-du. Oh god. Oh wait, how do I go frame by frame? I don't know. You do it on a Twitter. You put racing stripes on this fat ass.

Uh, wait, let me put some fat music on in the background. Good. I'll just go to the fat music folder, which I have located on my computer. Fat music. Fat music. Come on, come on, come on. You do the waddling from the aristocrats. Yeah, so you're going to find that fucking weird hell, you ain't got to be fat. Yeah, if you put fat music in that thing, you on, come on. You do the waddling from the Aristocrats. Yeah, so you've got to find just that fucking weird alien cubic fat.

Yeah, if you put fat music in that thing, you can just find. Of course, what is this? I don't know. Fat sound effects. No, that's not what you're talking about. Family guy, fat tuba. That's a fart, that's not fat tuba.

Here we go. Okay. That's a fart that's not fat To be here we go Okay Stop it $60. I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like,

I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like,

I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like,

I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, you know you thought he was riding high should he be driving around a golden Lamborghini he's eating after good exposing the plagiarist Justin Wang yeah here's uh... and the demon esterios coconuts what do you guys want i got some trans shit here

somebody told me my esterios impression was pretty good that was that was really funny ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I mean, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like,

I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like,

I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like,

I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, Yeah, put his bedroom on yeah, look so so Maddox's bedroom this with the stupid slime time sheets gets reposted all the time as like pathetic and lame and like people I think the two sharks and nothing else on the wall are an important part of it as well You buy a poster not too large novelty Cardboard sharks Aren't as cool veto. Yeah, you're a girl's love sharks as office, as like an orthodontist, children's orthodontist office. This one was and read it, male living space.

I've got lots of debt, so I can't buy fancy furniture and I'm recently single. I need help making my flat a bit more appealing to chicks. Nice. Obviously, joke, right. So Maddox says, a few years ago, a stalker posted this picture online and shared it with his neo-Nazi followers. Is he talking about me? I would hope he's not talking about me.

Neo-Nazis. I hope he's not talking about me. Neo-Nazis were really amped up about posting your fucking slime time at DuVay. I shared it with his neo-Nazi followers to try and shame me for being hilarious, Dick. That's what the shaming you for. We're not shaming you, man. I'm hilarious, you are. It's just like retarded,

because you're like a loser and you have a box for a night-bork. And it backfired spectacularly. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Here's the story behind this picture. Does he have an entire, oh, he and then he has another tweet about it somewhere. Here's the story behind this picture. Does he have an entire, oh, he and then he has another tweet about it somewhere? Here's the story.

He was the story. You have a child's bedroom. Yeah. And you're 40. Yeah, you're an adult, who lives as a toddler, which I can, you know, understand as I do the same thing. I just don't post pictures of it on the internet nearly as much. Did you know to go back to the good old days?

The good old days. I knew you were not. of it on the internet. New rules. I think we're back to the good old days. Good old days. I knew it was the last. Yeah. Back when he could just make fun of children. Yeah, back when he could make fun of kids in peace. Yeah. Yeah. He even made fun of that kids singing video.

Remember that? Which he had actual YouTube videos of kids, children singing and he tried. They would ridicule them for. Yes, he tried a new thing where he mocked them for singing that's not the same as the drawings but yeah yeah like when you see the dry the drawing he doesn't you know also post pictures of the kid and go yeah this is Bradley age eight from Nebraska and he goes to the swallow middle school and I everybody rip on him and

make him feel it no no don't rip on the actual kid, man. He posted some more about the idea of childhood. Yes. Yes. Yes. Not actual children. You're not mocking, surely you're not mocking children for singing on YouTube where they also are. Are you? That's not happening. Look at how bad they are at doing things that adults are supposed to do. Yeah. You know, why don't you get a kid, you know, making stuff out of blocks and being like, see, that sucks. I could have built a better block tower. Yeah. The race car bed. That's pretty. Yeah. That's pretty good. So then, oh, yeah, this is a good follow up. So a girl, some e-hor. Yeah. Yeah. here it is. Okay. So this is mad. This is the full story that he said, go here to read the whole story. And it's the same story.

He says a few years ago, a Nazi sympathizer. So not a Nazi, not a neo-Nazi. No, no, no. It's a great. The Nazi sympathizer doxed me. It's a really loose definition. Is he calling Ben from Drunken Peasants a Nazi sympathizer? Or is he talking about the apartment landlord who boasts of the photo? Is that a Nazi sympathizer? Well, Maddox gave the Drunken Peasants a list of words that they had to moderate from chat for him to appear on their show. And it was all of it was like, Dick, Dick, my ass is in lawsuit. Like all of it was like, cuck, like normal stuff.

But then he also put his address on there but he scrambled it so it wouldn't look like an address. So then when they read the moderated list, they didn't know it was an address. It was like, the number was in one spot and the street name was another spot. So they read it, not knowing that. And somebody figured out like, oh, it's probably an address.

Like there's two things there. Oh, it was a number. And when did they read the moderation list, like later on? Portland, at the Portland live show. Yeah. They're like, get a list of these and they're reading them and he's like, I don't know what this one is. And I said, Oh, no.

So he, so I guess yeah, he's the Nazi sympathizer. Was anyone posting his address at the time? Oh, God no. No, we don't care about that shit. He's like wanting ahead for potential doxing and then ended up just doxing himself because he's a moron. Self-fulfilling prophecy. Why does he say that this has been seen in the Louvre?

What is he talking about? Yeah, so he says a few years ago, Nazi sympathizer, doxed me and posted pictures of my old room to his neo-Nazi buddies. Okay, so Nazi sympathizer and neo-Nazi buddies. It backfired spectacularly. Um, okay. Does he think that? No, I don't know.

Maybe. Maybe he does. Here's what I've never understood about Maddox. I can't tell if he's lying or stupid ever. Well, yeah. Cause he's both. He does both interchangeably at all times. Oh.

This is like peeing your pants and laughing at other people. What? Laughing at you, idiot. You can yell without your pants aren't peeing at all, idiot. Oh yeah, I don't want to pee my pants All the cool kids are doing it. It's a Backpacked yeah, yeah, it backfired spectacularly my followers my followers Posted it everywhere as a work of art Including the Louvre and Armenian Consulate

Max, I don't think your followers were posting that on the Armenian consulate to make fun to laugh with you. I think people were posting in the Armenian consulate to make fun of you. Yeah. Look, they're all laughing with me because I peed my pants. So cool. It was dripping. Jokes only, I was only pretending to have a child's bedroom.

It just went viral again in the consulate. It's what you got to show us the only pretending to have a child's bedroom. It just went viral again in the comments. Well, you got to show us the lady responding to it though. Oh, yeah. Let me see if I. Emmy says, Emmy, Emmy Allu says, if I walk into a man's room and it looks like this, I'm taking it all off. She's obviously joking. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, she's not doing that. Okay. She's just trying to sell her only slime chamber. Miss. So Maddox says, all right, all right, Emmy Lou, bet. He's adopting the vernacular of the youth, Dick. Oh boy.

All right, Emmy Lou, bet. How do you do fellow kids? I'm the designer of that amazing bet. He's got so excited, he didn't even put a period on it. Oh wow. Listen, listen, listen. Well, what size of an oof? I'm the designer of that amazing bedroom. He's got so excited, he didn't even put a period on it. Listen, listen, listen. Well, what size of an ufus in the kit, man, you're a child, what do you, you know, you're cool and hip,

what size of the ufus is this? 12, 12. 12, yeah, okay. Honestly, post like an updated bedroom pick, like that would be the way to own it. Is that like a really nice room but put that stupid slime blanket on it. You know, everything's my agony and oh, wow. You're vertical.

Holy hell. Back from the floor. Nicola, give him the microphone for one second. We were just making fun of your, you know, the manager at the theater showed us the security footage of you because she was so excited and called it. It's like when Peter Griffin falls down the stairs and family guy. Ah, that sounds wonderful and very in character for drunk me. I didn't know you were such a heckler when you were drunk.

I would have never thought that like, who the fuck is this guy? Bird. I don't even know what I must have said. I was a gibberish. Yeah, you were going like, yeah, that's what I had done. Like bottle of soda right before the show. Not aberish. Yeah, I didn't know. You were going like, That's what I had done. Like, bottle of soju right before the show, not a good idea. Yeah. Good ol' soju.

Okay. And please do send me that video as soon as possible. Yeah, we got a good video. So she says, if I walk into a man's room and it looks like this, I'm taking it all off, and he... How far apart is this message, do you think? I don't know. That does.

All right, I'm a designer. Oh man. Do girls like it when old men try to use your slang or should we just use our own slang or no slang, perhaps? Just be your own person. I don't know, don't try it. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, just a shell that we fill with lies women have said to us. Yeah. And the lies at the bottom get compressed with the weight of the new ones. The woman folk need to be tricked.

It's the only thing that we've learned across the years. Our most honest moments are after we come. And then it's, which is to see that. Yeah. So bet or better no bet. Deal or no deal. For real?

100%. Do you say bet? 100%. I don't. I say no, deal. Mm. Bad. For real? 100%. Do you say bad? 100% bad, I don't. I say, I say bad sometimes. I'm like, you bet, I guess. Yeah, that's my most immediate. Like, I'm gonna buy you a cheeseburger and you're like, bet.

I'm like, prove it, bitch. Yeah, prove it. Ralph says, bet. He rocks it. Yeah. I'm gonna ravage that pull. You're like, bad. Bad.

What the fuck was this? I'm just assuming. I've seen Riley's raw masculine energy in front of that warehouse, and now I just can only imagine what's going on in the bedroom. I have to pay him to have sex with me. He's that like Chad, ultra Chad.

How much does he charge? $1,000. No, no no is he charged by the inch or Charged by giving you a man are gonna make a cuckold only have 500 bucks. She seems to like it It's Riley this Riley's gonna love the idea. Yeah tell them that Riley might better watch it Riley's gonna come shave you yeah fair enough Riley might better watch it. Riley's gonna come shave you. Yeah fair enough Okay, what else did I have here something about man. Oh, yeah, the oh here we go. This is a good one suicide's always fun Oh, no always buzz my favorite pass. Oh, suicide it I think we all made it home last night

Top cases cop top causes of death is pretty interesting. I did like the guy who kept dropping glasses at the meetup. Yeah, his buddy Seth. Will. Yeah, will. Yeah. That's great. How do the top causes of death differ by age and state?

This is in the course of 20 years. So this was 20 years ago, 2000s. Accidents were the biggest cause for teenagers to die and then it jumped up to, I think that suicides. Couple suicides. The worst states. Yeah, then 18 to 44. 18 to 44.

Is this a state? Yeah, this is a map of the US and it's like, which, what were the deaths? Here was 20 years ago, pretty much all car accidents and stuff for 18 to 45. Now flash forward 20 years and the most common form of death is suicide. And what does that say?

Bettenall. Oh yeah, you're right. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa're right. Whoa. Whoa. The entire west, the entire western half of the US is suicide. And the entire eastern half is Fetanol and opioid abuse. Wow. Nice.

Oh. What are the other ones in this particular area? I think it's safe to say that there are parents. But, if you went from. Yeah. Wow Florida sucks. No, that's South Carolina and. What is that? New Hampshire. No, Maryland Baltimore. Baltimore. Welcome to America folks. Wow, that's rough guys. Rough time for 18 to 44. Why are they killing themselves in the West Coast? We got good weather. We got a skateboards.

They're all trans. Didn't you have like a crying fit? Because of... Yeah, we're not gonna kill myself. Wow. But I had to make a list of ranking everybody. We're doing full-sensualists. Yeah. Yeah, but I'm dealing with the stress of fame and accolade. I feel like there's... I'm dealing with the stress'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody.

I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody.

I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody.

I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. I'm doing everybody. Yeah, so they're identical. Oh wow, that's a lot more heart attacks. Wow, look at that. Oh, obesity will get you, man. So the boomers are getting hit,

or the gen Xers maybe are getting hit with a shitload of heart attacks, because they're 20 years. They can have any cumial. Like, just when the hospital to get his pipes unclogged. A really? Yeah. What's that, Gray?

It's just no data or something. Is that Utah? That's ghost killer. Okay. Ghost. Ghost. Ghost. To Utah. Yeah, the Mormons got a big ghost, bro. I've heard about that. Okay. Um, I don't know. Mormon spirits appear at night and they'll just strangle your children. Top causes of death. Great to God, Ron. See, war with China would kill. They said, 300, 300, 600 people a day. The army said, if we went to war with China, yeah, isn't that a 9-11 every day?

Yeah. Oh yeah. 3600 people a day. We got plenty of people for that, right? Yeah. Well, how big is China? How big is China? I mean, how big is China possibly?

China's got a bajillion people, so. Is that American people would die or like people in general? I think Americans. Okay. I read the thing. Cause I was gonna sell soldiers in general, I think. Oh, okay. So.

Isn't we going to war with China? I mean, we're going to kill like 10 million of those motherfuckers. Yeah, I think there are armies the size of our entire country. I remember if that is true. But you fire like one missile at Shanghai, you're gonna hit like a billion Chinese guys. Yeah.

You shoot, you're gonna want, you're gonna kill like 10 dudes. They put it with every apartment sky, like 50 Chinese people living in it. Killin' themselves. Oh yeah, here's a, let's see, here's the one with the, I don't think we'd go to war with China.

I think it'd be too complicated. Will they make all your pharmaceuticals. Why would we not, though, Vito? They're too funny. Funny? Yeah. China is too funny. PNNR Coke and stuff, yeah.

Hahaha. Hahaha. Hahaha. Hahaha. Hahaha. Hahaha. Hahaha. Hahaha.

Hahaha. Hahaha. I was gonna have to have to have a Chinese guy with a Coke animal. Yeah, I know what you have to do. Hahaha. I know what you're up to. I know what you're up to. That's a good one. This is the Texas guy, Abbott. Texas continues to bus my grants to sanctuary cities to relieve overwhelmed border towns. I mean, this is funny, right? That he's doing this because New York said

we're a sanctuary city for immigrants and we're going to be able to do this. We're going to be able to do this. We're going to be able to relieve overwhelmed border towns. I mean, this is funny, right? That he's doing this. Because New York said we're a sanctuary city for immigrants and we're better than you. So they're like, all right, here's all our immigrants. And they're like, oh, our city's fucked.

We can't, it's gonna cost us like a billion dollars. We got to stop this right now. So let's keep blessed him. That's funny. I support this. Which part? The busing? Yeah. Why? Because, yeah, you're right. All these like liberal cities were like, let's keep us in the next one support this which part the busing yeah why yeah because all

you're right all these like liberal cities were like well i don't understand the problem is if an immigrant showed up here i'd give my hug and a blanket and a place to live forever and it's like here's ten thousand of them it's like to put up her shut up like you said you guys said you guys asked for this So we got Texas can't act the same way Time to prove it then I guess Wasn't there a video of like mayor Eric Adams you I was like, get rid of him. He's like, oh, just get down. I didn't want to do it. Get down. Get down. Yeah, that's your fault.

You did this. Why don't you guys make some more pizzas, huh? Yeah. Yeah. So he says 12,000 to DC. Nice. Oh, man, imagine you're the immigrant, right? Hey, when you want to go to New York City or DC,

and I'm like, no, you know what I say? I don't know the difference say I don't know the difference Yeah, what's the thing? I sent this one to DC. Oh man, that's rough DC 15,000 to New York City 10,000 Chicago 3000 a filly Chicago 2000 to Denver now, but this one that's weird 600 to LA that's it. What the fuck was it a lottery? I think the one of the one yeah what's that I'm saying the ones who want to go to LA I think

they don't think I think them I think the Mexicans knew how to get to LA already yeah I don't think you're teaching anybody a lesson by sending uh... Mexican immigrants to LA here 650a. uh... here's six hundred fifty mexican oh no they will send you guys some bibles how about that well that'll show you uh... why did they choose big cities like well because these are like big liberal cities that they want to make

like that they want to give them a taste of their own medicine and also supposedly they would have some amount of resources to maybe deal with some of this uh... no it's teaching them a lesson. That's what we're doing. You know, I'm going to put them in the desert or it is. But LA is not going to be taught a lesson by sending more sand to the beach.

No. You know, here you guys, here's some more like, don't worry, we have resources to soak up an infinite number of Mexicans because we have mech, it's like half Mexico here. We've got tons of garages that are converted into fucking sleeping pods for these 600. You can send 600,000 here. We'll be fine. You fucking asshole. Either do it or do none because this is not doing your, this is not making your point. Did you see the report that San Francisco has like an RV park where they've been keeping all the like the homeless people let them have their RVs going.

Oh really? It's like a big parking lot, but yeah. Then they said, and it's costing $140,000 per year per RV. And you're like, wait, what the fuck? 140,000 dollars. Wow. Why don't you just give it to them at that point and let them go buy enough fentanyl to kill themselves and like 20. That's a cost that my wife's going on to. Why don't you just give it to him at that point and let him go buy enough fentanyl to kill themselves and like 20

I was a cost that my wife Oh no But dude, he literally said yeah, it's causing the city a hundred and forty thousand dollars for each RV in this stupid parking lot Oh my God I assume it must be well, I assume part of it's like getting them out Because they destroy them every day and they have to fix them every day I think it's part of it I think probably they're like factoring the cost of getting them

healthcare and mental health counselors and all this other bullshit that they don't actually probably need. I love, I hate that meme. You know, we got to do some, well, everything's totally fucked and everyone's broke and poor. Maybe if a lady talks to you for an hour every week, everything will be fine. Maybe if a crisis council comes out, I'm just, no, actually not. That's illegal. No, don't look at her. No, actually not. That's illegal.

No, that's actually, yeah, look at her. Don't look at her and anything kind of way. Don't try to text her afterwards. Like, yeah, that sounds amazing. What do you feel like the biggest source of your troubles is, my homelessness, well, you'll get through it. Yeah. By the way, I get paid $500,000 a year by the city.

Yeah, by the city. That could have bound to make it. You're the killing you. You're the problem. You're the problem. You're the problem. Exactly. Hey there buddy, if you thought about maybe, I don't know, feeling a little bit better?

Yeah. Maybe you could park your arse. Isn't that just what it is? So it sucks to be up. Yeah, so it's morning. Yeah, okay, this is Caribbean nations want $33 trillion for slavery reparations. And they want that from Britain, France, Spain, and Denmark. It's a $33 trillion for slavery reparations.

And they want that from Britain, France, Spain, and Denmark. Oh good, they don't want it from us. They have a 10 point plan that would include a formal apology. Well, you can get that pretty easy. All the white nations, $33 trillion. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Can I have $3 trillion? No.

Can I have an apology? I just feel like money, you know, we can sorry. I'm so sorry. Can I have $3 trillion? No. Can I have an apology? I just feel like money, you know, we can't put a price on it. We can't get you in a polypons. Sorry, we can't do this because it's not nearly enough. We need to give you more. We can't afford to sponsor. Man, I think he will beat Trump.

Yes, I think so. I think DeSantis is doing that debate just to lose and get new some in the spotlight to beat Trump. Trump can't, I hate to say it, but Trump can't be Newsom. Can't beat him. Can't beat him. Newsom's just too fucking good, man. You see that good?

Have you ever seen him? He's a turkey guy. He's a turkey guy. Newsom told black people, he made black people spend a year figuring out how much money he owed them. And then he said, you know what? It's not enough Trump would that's so funny Trump would never have the audacity to do that So funny that's funny. You're then the then the worst thing Trump has ever said guys like whole

I've looked at your proposal and you're right, but it doesn't go far enough and How far should it go, you know what, you know, I'm gonna have to think about it. I think it would be offensive to even answer that question. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha It was totally retarded. The whole point of it was to fuck around. They could have fucked around a little bit later. It was like an elementary school student government. I want every black person to get a teleporting machine. Sure, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Sure, do that.

Um, let's see here. The races were reversed. Oh yeah, this is an interesting one. It's a video from a school that compares white people to mosquitoes. Oh, that's good. Seems like it would be a fun watch. Okay, I'll read some comments.

This is staff at what school is this? Some kind of school. Reportedly had a professional, what? New Prague pilot over again? Yeah, you know them? New Prague area schools. Is that New Prague?

Is that like a, East Coast, something maybe? Oh, is it? Let's see Something maybe. Oh, isn't it? Let's see. Maybe it's, I don't want to get caught with another face. Is that like a new Prague? No, I'm like a, yeah. All right, John.

New Prague schools. What are you going to the bathroom? Yeah, Kevin. All right. Okay. Not doing something goofy. And yeah, MN, what is that? Minnesota?

Minnesota. Okay. Minnesota, so this was training for teachers. That's where Nick is. Nick who had to apologize to Eric Jolai. Can you believe that? Minnesota? Minnesota, okay. Minnesota, so this was training for teachers. That's where Nick is. Nick who had to apologize to Eric Jolani. Can you believe that? Apologize them? I'm hoping the apology was on the level of...

I would like to apologize to Eric Jolani too. Yeah. Yeah, sorry. Well, I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. Yeah, I'm sorry for everything. I'm making shit. Okay, here we go. I apologize to Eric Jolani. You saw that video. I said I'm sorry for everything. I'm a shit. Okay, here we go. I apologize there. You saw that video

I said I'm sorry for hurting your feelings Reportedly had a professional development training which included this bizarre and racist video comparing white people to miskidaz Okay, let's see this could be interesting with formative maybe Miskidobites and their itch her one of nature's most annoying features But if you're only bitten every once in a while. No, where are you really from? Cleveland sure it's annoying, but it's not that big a deal. Oh Okay, so white people in there questions about Oh, race and stuff are mosquitoes. We're the blood suckers. Okay, Niggler. Come on

Sounds like you were implying other- Daddy get outta here! What was I impl... Get outta here! Get outta here, Maddie! Oh, we're the blood suckers! I felt like some... Some classic rhetoric.

I feel offended. I don't like mosquitoes. Let her go back up a little bit so she can go. I don't get... I don't know, man. I've never, I would love to have a person of color tell me like, when people assume you have a more interesting background, you do, you're not offensive, or you just kind of ashamed, you're like, no, I am. They're offended by unusual things as we've witnessed in the last week.

Okay, here we go. It's not that big of a deal to get bit by my progression, I believe. The problem is that some people get bitten by mosquitoes a lot more than other people. I mean, a lot more. Whether it's on a date. Oh, your aim was so good. Excuse me. I'm just trying to happen.

I'm just trying to happen. Commuting to work. So when are you going to have a baby? Watching TV. We have to keep the rights to work. So when are you gonna have a baby? Watching TV. We have to keep the red skin's name. Part of our culture and history. Or just walking down the street with your partner. I couldn't even tell you were gay.

He's still a son of a fucker. He's real. What? Yes. I couldn't even tell you were gay. Well then, who's the one going like, oh, hi, my name is Kevin. Is that like a real thing that you're telling me that's fucking

Exactly so some of them are trying to make you know that they're gay some of them are being more sneaky I Go seem to pop up everywhere And getting bit by mosquitoes every day Multiple times for this. Oh, can I touch it? Can I touch it? Can I touch it? It's fun.

I'm pleased. I'm pleased. I'm pleased. She's killing people. She's like a huge overreaction to people who only get it every once in a while. Ah, mosquito bite. Who cares? Just another angry black one.

Oh, of course she is. She's so wild. Some mosquitoes carry truly threatening diseases that can mess up your life for years astrophysics Maybe you should try this challenging major The science stem and like colleges are so aggressive to Minorities right legendarily Discorraging says I want to be a scientist they go absolutely Are you kidding? You?

Yeah. Did they just say a little dance? They're like, oh, thank God, I don't have to crush those. I mean, I hate that. Let me touch your hair, shit. But because women are doing it, I've never felt the need to touch anyone's hair. No man has ever asked a black person if they could touch their fucking hair. Women do it.

When a black woman, how often that actually happens. You know what I bet? I think they do it. I might test this theory, but I think that if you witness a white woman, work, just don't reject this right away. Hear it out. If you see a white woman asking a black woman

to touch your hair, I think you're allowed to slap her. Okay. Okay. I'm pretty confident in this. Social contrary. That if that goes on the internet, you will win. I might test this year.

Don't you regret, girl, dress her. Can I touch your hair? I'm gonna wear a black woman. I'm gonna wear a black woman. I'm gonna wear a black woman. I'm gonna wear a black woman. I'm gonna wear a black woman. I'm gonna wear a black woman.

I'm gonna wear a black woman. I'm gonna wear a black woman. I'm gonna wear a black woman. I'm gonna wear a black woman. I'm gonna wear a black woman. I'm I'll win that one. You might. You mentioned that, man. You'd be a champion of the black woman at that point. I thought everyone, they're all women. It has to be filmed though, right? Yeah. Well, yeah, yeah. There would be no point to anything. I don't know, we just feel like one of those TikTok channels,

like Maddox is doing where we fake social interactions for clicks. Yeah, okay. Look, he stepped over a blind person. Can you believe it? And then I still get to slap the woman Yeah, slap the woman for real. Yeah, all right here. It's out you can do black, right? What do you mean by that? I'll just paint. Yeah, what specifically did you mean by that? Yeah?

I meant that she would play the black lady. Oh, okay. Oh, so you did mean it like we thought I don't Just because I'm autistic. Yeah, don't touch me. Don't say you can play it perfectly. So much as to touch your hair, and you can pretend it's a black thing instead of an autistic thing. I think you're permission to slap them? No, Dick's gonna slap them.

I'll slap them. I'm going to have a hat. Oh, I can't slap anyone. Dang it. No, no, that wouldn't be okay. Okay. That would ironically not be allowed, but I'm pretty sure me slapping a white woman

and exhibiting black touching and asking which would defeat the point of what we're trying to do here. Yeah, go ahead, Negler. Uh, if you don't want to do it, I could do it. We mean, I can, you could do what? You're gonna be the black person. No, I'm halfway there to the black face. No, no, no, no, no, no.

We're my mask. You're not supposed to say that. Yeah, you're destroying your character. Okay. All right. Here's the, let's see what else these mosquitoes are doing. Dreams. Another mosquito's carry strains that can even kill you.

It looked like he was up to trouble. Okay. I felt threatened. So, next time you think someone's overreacting, just remembered. Some people experience mosquito bites all the time. You're also exotic. Wow.

And by mosquito bites, we mean microaggressions. Oh, and then they killed the white person. Yeah. Yeah. Get some fucking bug spray. She's this fuck. So I guess the metaphor they were trying to go for was that the mosquitos aren't like naggers.

Well, the way to accomplish it would be to have it that people say something and that causes a mosquito up here. And the mosquito is actually a microaggressive not a person, instead they made it a person. So that it's about, it's okay to kill people if they might progress you. Yeah. And also if people keep asking about your hair,

you're allowed to have a crazy psycho freak out, let's get filmed and put on the internet. Yeah, I agree. Well, the flame throw. All right, this is, maybe this is the last one that we'll do comments. This is the next, get fun, tunnel. Ah, blah, blah, blah, da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da with a toddler going under a concerto wire, which is not barbed wire, but it's got these little slicey animals.

Like, now I want to deal with it. Like, will it cut you up or not? Animals veto? Yeah, what do you mean by animals? Yeah. Well, I'm saying like, what is the purpose of it? Because I saw a kid crawling through it, like it was fun.

I didn't see anybody get cut or anything. You didn't see the kid, the kid, the, are you retarded? You're barbed wire tweet. Vito, it's razor wire. Well, they're not having fun. Hey kid looked like he was having fun as my smiling. I do not think that that's true. Go to Twitter.

Yeah. Didn't you and search? It's crawler. Search for incredibly racist takes. Barbed wire. Well, I'm going to watch this. Okay. Do you think the kids having fun? I think I was like, wow, razor wire is fucking useless cause the kids just crawling through the web.

What do you mean, which crawling? Barbed wire. Barbed wire. Toddler crawl, look, everyone's having fun. Yeah, that looks fun. What the fuck are you talking about? That's not fun looks fun to me they're laughing you can hear them laughing laughing he's right

they have a little like it's okay let's go no I think the kids going that does not sound like fun it's fun at the front and then she got mad because No, I think the kids going The front and she got mad because she was out of the tunnel and it wasn't fun anymore It's fun. It's fun for you and your people you like this part You go yay, we're going to take all the resources. Yay. We get a free bus. We're taking a lot of your comic book money. We'll sorry about that.

We're watching DTC. And we get to go to Chicago. Obviously, Hamden, they are having fun. They're having fun. This is why you guys have those Mexican parties with those bounce houses and the time. We love it. Yeah, we love it.

We love it. We love it. We love it. We love it. We houses and the we love it. Yeah. We love on training to jump over the fucking wall. Be coming to this country and you don't want to an adventure. They're on an adventure. It's the fucking great escape. Grandma's throwing sandals. Chonkles at us. Yeah, that is true. How is this part why I mean, it would be fun. What now they I'm thinking about it in this new way. It would be fun. I would be trying to get through all this barbed wire every time I It would be fun. What, now that I'm thinking about it in this new way, it would be fun. It would be fun.

Try to get through all this barbed wire. Every time I'm hiding it, I'm just like, go to Burning Man and dude, like very dangerous sculptures and climb them, like I walked on that fucking IB. That was fucking terrifying, but it was fun. Oh, wipe dude. She has that fucking like mud run stuff. Yeah, pretty sure.

Yeah, pretty shit. Look at her face. Take this barbed wire down, I'm having too much fun. Yeah. They're having the time of their life, dude. That's the thing. Every time it's like, oh, can you believe with these Mexican immigrants suffered together? It's like, oh, cool. First you swim across the lake. And then there was like some wire we had to get under and like cool fence. They love it. They love the challenge. If anything, we should add more cool obstacles. So they get that even more fun trying to cross over. Like you're saying, it should be, what do you call it, an American gladiators type situation. We don't need border patrol.

We need ice. We need laser. We need a Titan. Okay, and they've all got tennis ball cannons. And if you can hit by a ball, you gotta have Mexican names, though, for them to think it's fun, though. Well, for the gladiators, well, for them to think it's fun, though. Well, for the Gladiators, well, then they're not American Gladiators at that point. It's, no, you're right, you're right, you're right. They're the American Gladiators. If they're anything, they should have very stereotypical names, like Charles. Chad.

Yeah, Charles. It's George Washington. The founding fathers need to be at the board. It's Washington testing them a tennis ball. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do I'm going to piss. No, Vito, you complicate every idea. You can't stop. Stop what I'm just sitting the whole model head and then suddenly, and that's when the tennis balls come turn into little Mexicans. Yeah.

No, I added this really cool picture. Always take an idea one step too far. Isn't that the rule? Anyway, there's your people. They love it. I'm tired of the crying about the fun tunnels we've made for you guys to crawl through. And again, if it's razor wire, I've never seen anybody get cut. Yeah, they're not.

You've never seen, you've never seen. This look like how is how can you crawl through barbed wire and not get like even a nick? They're not showing the footage. You don't see the cardboard on her back? Yeah, but I'm saying, like, wouldn't they fuck up every once in a nick. They're not showing the footage. You don't see the cardboard on her back? Yeah, but I'm saying, like, wouldn't they fuck up every once in a while? I'm like fuck up and go, ow, I accidentally hit my arm or something. There's other videos, man,

of kids like Colin Talien's, yeah, they would, you give them a cardboard and barbed wire, I'd be like, oh, what are we even doing over here? What is going on? We make this cardboard and offer it, it can't refuse, oh, pizza, canolee. Right? You guys are having fun in these videos.

Hold on, Jimmy, you put the cardboard on me, and then I'll cry, and then, oh, we're not about it, right? You fucked it up. We gotta put the chainsaws back on the booze as well. Let's see here. I'm playing more of it. More than 2,000 migrants have lined up daily.

It looks like American Ninja. Imagine you're a... Imagine you're a... Imagine you're a... Yeah. They're side-of-way verse right now. Yeah. Mexican Ninja Warrior. We're side-of-way verse right now. Yeah.

Mexican Ninja Warrior. We're side-of-way verse right now. Yeah. Mexican Ninja Warrior. We're side-of-way verse right now. Yeah. Mexican Ninja Warrior. We're side-of-way verse right now. Mexican Ninja Warrior. Mexican Ninja Warrior.

Mexican Ninja Warrior. Mexican Ninja Warrior. Mexican Ninja Warrior. Mexican Ninja Warrior. Mexican Ninja Warrior. Mexican Ninja Warrior. Mexican Ninja Warrior. Mexican Ninja Warrior. Just do that. And then if you fell in, you got flushed in a tube, like that is family. It's said you all the way back. Back to the very tip of fucking Brazil, or the very bottom. Ah! If you know Mexican in this country,

maybe I'll be a real crack. You'd be upset. You'd be like, well, they made it all the way to the top of the agro crack. Like if anything, that's the Mexicans we want. Do you think anybody in our audience owns a piece of the agro crack legitimately legitimately I don't know I don't think I don't give it to you just because you can buy him on eBay I was actually looking on eBay

today for some reason for for some reason I can't imagine but I can't know what happened to like popped up in my look at porn when I'm hungover a video looks at eBay to buy a bunch of fucking toys I would like a piece of the agro crag. So not one of the super agro crag. And it wasn't neon. That's a lot of wire to cut man. It was cool. What'd you say Vito? Drama would have became the super agro crag,

but it was no longer this neon green color. It was like silver. And I was like, oh, fuck the super agro crag. Yeah, I didn't like that. The original agro crag was cool. That was cool. Yeah. Uh, man, you of course grew up watching Nickelodeon cuts. You're like, I'm 20. I know

none of this. Yeah, it's it's all going over my head. Do you have it guts? That's the question I'm asking every Mexican. So, you know, Mexican guts. Imagine you're a Mexican and you want to illegally cross into America and then you show up in the walls are wide open. You'd be disappointed. Yeah. I'm not, this is not what I'm saying is not incorrect. If you showed up and you had your ladder and you're fucking broke and stuff, you're like, you're grappling hook and all this stuff. I spend all this time training.

You got your family, I got this whole fucking plan, I got a rope ladder, you show up and gates open. You're like, now it kind of feels like, it's like when you like, when the game piracy started to be big and you just download the game, you're like, why don't you really wanna play it anymore? Right. Like now they don't wanna really do

a lot of things anymore. Like super Nintendo ROM, you're like, eh, I don't wanna play it anymore. Yeah, so we gotta get these Mexican- Good advice. Run around. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha security. Hmm. Just going to go. Just going to go work, I guess. I'll just get a job. All right. Let's do.

I don't think I have anything else. Oh, I have an interesting tweet from RFK. Mexicans, do you have it? Gods. Remember how RFK was so popular for two seconds? Two seconds. What did he say that he was probably, because he was like an anti-COVID guy. Anyway, jacked.

RFK says obesity rose again in 2022, shocker. My administration is going to massively shift public health resources to chronic conditions like obesity. We don't have to take this, we don't have to take this trend for granted. Blaming, here's the, here's the, here's the punchline. Like this guy. Blaming the obese is not productive. Yes.

It's not like human nature suddenly turned lazy over the last 30 years. Something is poisoning Americans. Let's find out what it is and eliminate it. Seed oils. That's the problem. It's all that corn. Where is that?

Can I see that jug? You're sucking cocktail flavored sugar out of like a fucking like a 300 pound hummingbird. Can I see what's in that thing? It's got a little bit of sugar in it. It's for serving. So was this new today? No, no, that's better in my fridge.

Are you sure? For the fridge since this morning? You drank a little bit better. You really drank any of that today. I'm out, there's eight servings, total sugar is 25 grams. I'm also flushing out my system, you know. With sugar? You're in, oh, cranberry juice, also then.

This isn't a flush. It's a flush. No, like a diet, like a water. You want me to get like snow, but like, electrolytes. They tell you get cranberry juice if you're trying to flush out your room. like, like electrolytes. They tell you get cranberry juice if you're trying to flush out your room. Who says that?

Doc, but this isn't cranberry juice. This is a juice cocktail. It's cranberry juice, but it's like, have you had straight cranberry juice? It's like bitter and terrible. Which means it probably works. Yeah. No, so I could juice that's horrible.

They have to add 25 grams of sugar per serving to make it palatable. Look, I'm not shugging the whole thing. All right, I'm having a little bit because my throat's fucked up, and I'm trying to flush some shit out on my system because I think I'm getting sick. Okay, that's it. Okay. Should RFK investigate the what's being...

I don't drink it all the time. I'm only drinking it because I don't feel good. Could you drink something that tastes good naturally? So you don't have to put 25 grams of sugar in it. It is my experience that cranberry juice helps with a variety of ailments. Okay, so I just drink without the sugar. Okay.

It's got natural sugar in it. Cranberry juice also has sugar in it. Not really. The cranberry's have sugars. That's why they're sweet. Maybe like one gram. Yeah. Cranberry juice.

You know what? Nutrition. What? Fuck you guys. Yeah. Um, treat some comments. Ali says. I'm a sugar and unsweetened cranberry juice.

So it's already bad for you anyway. Oh, okay. Well, maybe you're right. Calories 10. That's a bad for you anyway. Oh, okay. Well, maybe you're right. Calories 10. That's a different one. Oh. Unsweetened cranberry juice, 31 grams of sugar. Well, that's more than the sweetened one.

That can't be true. No, because the sweetened one adds 25 grams of sugar. But it's also watered down. Okay. So it's mixed with water, so that reduces some of the sugar. Oh, maybe you're right. I don't know.

All right. Cranberry juice might actually have more sugar. I'm not sure. Normal cranberry juice has more sugar than the cocktail juice. Is the cocktail juice is watered down, like they add water to it. So that reduces the amount of sugar per serving.

Okay. Elias says these WATP crossover episodes need to happen more. Two a month, maybe one of each of your Patreon, so people will subscribe to both. They're talking about a WATP crossover episode that we have on Patreon right now, Patreon.com slash the Dix show. We talked about the financial feminist who said that

women don't know how to stop spending money because of the patriarchy. Oh, that's what. Did you know that? Women have a lot of, she goes, she's got an audio book, the financial feminist, where she goes over the myths about money to help women become financially independent.

And a lot of it, as it turns out, is because of men. I mean, men are very good at tricking women to dispending money. Oh, she kind of has a good point. How so? Like, if I was a male executive and I'm like, all right, these bitches love bags, but they really only need one of them. Yeah. And it's like, well, how much should we sell it for?

And it's like, I don't know, let's put some stupid logos on it and sell it for like four grand. Yeah. It's men's fault. Well, it's definitely a male advertisement. It's not a woman who went into a store and said, do you have any more expensive bags? I see all these bags, but you have any that I could pay more money for

because I don't want to be like a cheap bitch. No man, I love you if you don't have a Louis Vuitton purse or whatever. That's what guys told women you're saying. Women weren't sitting around in caveman days going, you know, I like this all this utility stuff, but maybe if it just a little better than all the other girls utility bags.

I think, I think it's, I think, I think, I think, I think, I think, I think, it's matter-driving this. I think marketing is driving it. And marketing seems like a primarily male. You think it's tricking women? I think it's tricky. I think women are easily tricked.

Why, where was that, where is that tricking? Well, what do you call it? It's marketing making people eat so much. You ever want, did you watch? You love mad men. Yes. You know, all the parts where they're talking about, like, listen, you watch? You love madmen. Yes. You know, all the parts where they're talking about, like, listen, these broads are dumb as hell.

Yeah. And they're allowed to make all the household purchasing decisions, right? So there's a period of time in like the 50s and 60s where the man worked all day. And the one was responsible. That time is still very much now. Well, you know, you know, you know, make like 90% of purchasing. But now, man, I think make more, wait, do women still make most of the actual purchases? Yeah. So yeah, it's all about guys tricking women

into buying shit. Great. I totally agree. Do you know how much I yell at my girlfriend for buying things? It is. Yeah, but if you were a marketer, you would be tricking her into buying other stuff. There's no amount of marketing I can do that will make her stop spending money. Right. Well, they pray upon the woman's natural inclination to not understand how numbers work. Uh-huh. Willie says, hey, Digg, if you heard of Girl Math, my girlfriend does this thing where she spends a lot of money on her Nordstrom's card so that she gets free stuff with points. And when I explain that she's buying, she doesn't need any points to buy more things,

she doesn't need, she says, quote, but it's free. It's, it calls it girl math. Now she calls it girl math. So doing something insane. This is making it cute. Right, it's not. You're bankrupting our family. How would you explain a woman?

They do. Totally insane things. And then, wow, that sounds weird. No, no, no, I'm not done. They do totally insane things and then wow, that sounds weird. No, no, no, I'm not done. They do something totally insane and harmful and then they will tell you a cute name for it. That sounds like, oh, God.

When calls you, she's out with her mother right now trying to get her a new phone. My mom needs a phone, but they have a deal where if you buy three new iPhones, oh, for granted. but they have a deal where if you buy three new iPhones, it's for granted. If you buy three new iPhones, you get 30% off or something. So now because of Girl Math,

they're all getting new phones. Oh my. What is steel? You're saving 30% dick. Yeah. It's for money. I have a new phone, you don't need it all. Yeah. Women. Yeah. It's free money. I have a new phone. You don't need it all. Yeah. Women. Yeah. Can't live with them. Uh, you know, a woman meant salad. They're the worst.

I have not met a woman. Yeah. Good. What is a woman? What is a woman? Don't know. Don't care. Thanks, Matt. Uh, Danny. Uh, oh, yeah. Okay. Uh, uh, no, I would. You're cousin. Duke Spookham says, I hate Ukraine so much, it's unreal. I genuinely hope they lose in the most stupidity way possible. And everything is burned to the ground. Yeah, I mean, it's hard to, it's hard not to, at times.

Man, you guys are really, you know, they just want Russia to leave Malone. Yeah, who does? The Ukrainians. Yeah. What do you think about that? They want them to leave them alone so they can do their Nazi stuff in peace and I understand that.

Like, hey, what are they, Nazi that showed up and all the right wing guys are like, well, you know, the World War II was very complicated. No, the left wing guys are not it. No, the right wing guys were saying it too. They're helping them. Like, really? We can't just, we can't jump on this. So I'm like, fucking hang him, send him back to fucking Poland and fucking hang him. Not for the Nazi shit, but for going to Canada and being part of an ad campaign to steal

more money. Get fucking rid of him. Well, because he's not see, no, because he's trying to take more because he's a fucking thief. That's why he fought really hard And he did his best I want to see this goddamn Nazi hangin' from a fucking rope He's like 98 He did that shit a long time ago. He did the shit where he went on TV and tried to hustle people for hundreds of millions of dollars yesterday He's like 98

millions of dollars yesterday. He's like, fucking. He's like 98. He said he was really. And he's still a criminal. Fucking hang him. That'll be much easier now. Yeah, where's he gonna go? You don't even need the gallows.

Just grab a rope and yank it up real hard. Yeah, you're done. I think you can just knock his legs out from under him and he'll die from the stress to a roundhouse. Well, I'd be a hero then. I'll be a punch. I'll punch him. I'll fucking kill him. Sign me up

I'll come at I'm gonna take a running start. I'm gonna say hey, buddy. What was his name? Mr. Nazi man. Give me Come on just authorize me You know he's a Nazi. You know what he was doing. Doesn't matter. Just let me do it. I'll take a running start I'll tell him I'm coming and I'm still gonna fucking try to run away start i'll tell them i'm coming i'm still going to help fucking try to run away what well they're gonna have every member of canadian parliament falling over themselves to

protect them dick all whatever will dick do uh... can't believe i can't believe it government officials to get at him dick now imagine that yes i can't stop imagining it. Two standing evations.

Oh, I can't believe they, they, they, they botched that one. Can you believe the left is praising Hotsie? Oh, man, it's on. It's fucking on. Let's go. Race war. Let's go. Come on.

Well, you know, you guys got a really, you guys got to put it in perspective. No, I do not. I, I still feel bad for the guy who brought him in, you know. Yeah, I'm probably playing it wrong because he resigned. I'm like, he should just leaned into it and been like, well, some Nazis are cool. Yeah, I don't see what the problem is.

We're gonna say all Nazis are bad guys. What about the Nazis who cut all the other Nazis hair? He was probably just really good being a barber. He's good barber. What you're saying is extremely, I would be considered extremely anti-Semitic. I know the myth. The Nazi barbers are also still not even cutting hair apparently is. You still got to watch that Albert Spear documentary. The guy who convinced all the

other guys like we fucked up. He apologized. Oh yeah, I will wear a bird trials and they're like, all right, hey, he's like, I made a big oopsie, guys. This Hitler guy, I made a big oopsie, trust in that guy. I'm like, we're only gonna give you 10 years. You're great. Matt Seas has a girl at work didn't understand how petrol stations were okay,

Dicken John. Kevin. I work in education, meaning I work with a lot of women since they dominate the field. Today, one of the girls just turned 21 was in my office chatting and noticed the petrol station across the road had a tanker truck parked in it. 21 year old woman looking out the window, tanker truck parked next to a gas station. And was she confused by this? Well, Vito, have you ever been confused by a tanker truck at a gas station?

No. Think back when you were 21. You know, so they must be getting a lot of fuel. I'd be the first time you'd ever seen a gas station perhaps. She noticed that the truck seemed to be too big for the station. And I said, oh, they must be refilling the station. I thought it was already there. So I asked some follow-up questions. So she thinks they build the stations

of the pump natural deposits. Well, it cuts out the middleman. It's in a great other alternative way. I think it's a good idea to have a little bit of a good idea. I think it's a good idea to have a good idea to have a good idea. I think it's a good idea to have a good idea so she thinks they build the stations of the public patrol deposits. Well, you know, cuts out the middleman. Isn't a great how they're all conveniently spaced apart. Isn't a great how they can vote.

So I asked some follow up questions. I asked her to clarify what she meant by that. That's really, I mean, women will hate you forever for that question. What did you mean by that? I asked her to clarify what she meant by that and I was delighted to hear. I thought it was in the ground like coal.

You know. Oh. I said fair enough. So they only build petrol stations where there is already petrol under the ground. Yeah. She said. So I pushed a little more.

When you see a petrol station closing, that is because they have used all the petrol in the ground. Right? Well, yeah, I'm pretty sure. She said, you got a close up shop. Isn't that why really old petrol stations close? Because there's nothing left to sell, or am I being completely stupid

right now? I've been struggling staying in this workplace lately, but this was an absolute treat for me, an early Christmas, if you will. Milked the situation for a little and then explained it to her. Yeah. It's fun when women are weirdly wrong about a situation. Yeah. You know how a target has those big red balls in front of targets, so you can't just, I know, you're currently familiar with those big concrete balls. Yeah, you've met those big concrete balls.

So one time we were going into target and my girlfriend at the time was like, Please, we, you and all the other pedophiles. I'm the only pedophiles, along with my girlfriend at the time. She said, those giant magnets are crazy. And I said, what?

I said, go on. She's like, well, you know how if you try to take your card out of the parking lot, the big magnets will prevent you from doing it. And I went, do you think magnets are able to activate only at a certain distance away from the magnet? And she's like, yes, like if you try to push the card out, it won't go out of the card line.

Because of the magnet. Because the magnet force. Keep them in time, target. The parking lot is keeping the shopping cart in. No wonder girls don't like sci-fi. Like, it's like, well, I don't understand what's different about this than the world we live in. There's giant magnets. Apparently one time she tried to push the car out of the parking lot, you know how it has the wheels stopped. Yeah. Yeah. They're like, they're so sensitive. So she thought she was working

against Magnetism, like Magneto, the concentration camp. She thought she was pushing it against the force of the giant magnets that sit in front of every target. How hot was she? She was fine. That's the worst part. It's the hot ones and the whole spectrum. The normal ones, the hot ones, the ugly ones, they're all this dumb. I have no idea how she came up with, I'm like, did someone tell this to you?

Is this only a target that this applies to? What about if they don't have big balls and you can steal their balls? Like Walmart doesn't have those. So you can steal their balls like walmart doesn't have those so you can steal the shopping cart target came up and there could be a lot of the shabby well the magnets only work on the cards they're specially

uh... some sort of special magnet lock that only works on shopping carts that are a certain distance from the giant magnet ball and then it goes no no no no no and the giant magnet He's just magnet powers yeah, just suck the cart back If it sounds like I'm making this up like I did not It doesn't sound at all like you're making it even a child would listen to this or I go my dumb mom So yeah women have a lot of ideas, I guess, about how things work.

I really wanna know if she just came up, I should have asked her. I would love to put 10 women in a room and show a scythe in her something and ask them to independently explain how that works and just get that weld to the magnets and the giant magnet balls. That was funny.

I didn't even fucking do balls about that for months. Did you literally have balls? You talking, I'm saying every time I went to Target, I'm like, ooh, watch yourself though. You don't want to tell your data. You're up your phone on the big ball. It'll scramble all the internal circuits. She's like, shut the fuck up.

I know they're not magnets now. I'm like, uh, just, you know, we only own a solid collection. I said, I forget, I made some tweet that went viral and it was, well, women don't know that the sun and the moon are different things. Yeah, I remember that. And then everybody took that. And you post that, because Chelsea Handler said that on a show, right?

Many women have said that. Right. I have like a, I get a lot of comments from guys about stupid shit their wives or girlfriends have said, believe me. Yeah. So Reddit took it and they're like trying to decipher what I meant by it.

Like, is this a racist thing somewhere? Because the moon is Chinese? Yeah, I remember they were trying to pick apart. They're like, what is this with their fight believes now? Blubbleblebleble's like, no, actual women believe that there was like a news article at the time that was going around. Like Chelsea handler doesn't know the difference between the sun and the minute to it. I remember was. Oh, she was joking.

I'm, yeah, perhaps, but the thousands of other women who do not know the difference are not joking. I promise you, she said she eventually figured it out, but for the longest time, figured it out by getting yelled at. Exactly. A man eventually said, no, there's two different celestial bodies in the sky. The sun doesn't turn around and just spin around.

Now it's the moon. It does. Episode, prostitution comments. Hey, call me Geist. I live in a country with legal prostitution and I have befriended a handful of them from some of the circles I'm in a country with legal prostitution and I have befriended a handful of them from some of the circles I'm in. Going to a whorehouse isn't super common over here with a lot of the businesses, with

a lot of business seemingly coming from foreign businessmen. Your typical CD horn dogs and for the lack of a better term, those who require a tarred wrangler. In fact, an ant of mine was a wrangler and would tell me stories of how the Almighty taxpayer would fund the whore housing escapades of this one dude with Down syndrome and anger issues. Oh, he meant actually. Okay.

Who got banned from multiple establishments for beating ladies of after. Jesus Christ. That's all fair for you. Doing the God's work. That's that's disability for you You got to get these retarded guys laid come on. We can't they can't be getting not laid That's horrible. Oh, yeah, we did they kicked the shit out of the well Let's stop the whole the sex dolls more accessible to the common man. Let's be real We got to get these things down to 500 bucks a pop. Yeah, but a little Sony electronics and I'm CD player.

Put a woman talking to you. Get around the phone. Yeah, we don't need that. Get a sound board. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh to try to one up me on my Bouncer stories since I've only got one working leg these days and I can't even get payments to see a specialist. Okay, but I just need to start talking like Nathan from South Park from my next Tarte revision.

He wants to be found retiree. He wants to get free money. Okay. Anyways, keep up the great work. Much love from New Zealand. I fucking hope you cons. Can make your way down here someday for a road rage. I don't know, maybe I don't want to try Australia again.

It's not, I can't do it. I can't pay. Go to your pan, baby. Tramby cool. I got to go to Sweden. I was gonna go this summer, but I fucked it up. Shout out to Chris the Kiwi and Moon Milk for being based individuals and extra sloppy

smutcherina as for Shani's. Not here. X-O, your pal, guys. The canned situation on my prostitute friends ranges from double D to at least a G cup. Oh, wow. Wow. Oh, whoa, whoa.

But out of principle, I don't fuck single mothers. Well, okay. Okay. Have fun with principles. Advice, 19 and depressed at college. Hey, Dick, I'm writing to hopefully get some advice and how to turn my situation around. I'm a sophomore computer science major in college with no in rural IRL friends and no motivation outside of going to the gym and playing video games with my high school friends online. That's pretty good. Tall you need.

I'm fairly well built from working out for two years and I made almost $10,000 this summer at a shitty warehouse job. Whoa, don't be disrespectful. Yeah, careful. You never know what could happen in a warehouse. But I still. I'm a young guard at all times.

Armed guards. Buck fucking policing, just another comic surplus pay for no reason. How many armed guards do you think Marvel comics has at their warehouse, huh? Multiple armed guards. That's what he didn't say, an armed guard. He said, didn't say security. Armed guards, Armed guards. Yeah. And Nick, Ricki can't imagine why I think he's lying about charity stuff when he lies about literally everything. When he lies about literally everything. Thank you. Eric told me it was raining out of his sumo sunny.

I love Nick. I hope he made me feel this. I know he has to do our crisis. Yeah. You know what's funny is the video that had Eric on it on Nick's channel is just like thousands of people saying how stupid Eric is and how bad he looks and that actually maybe he did commit charity.

At first I thought Nick was fucking around but now I kind of think he did. Eric had his audience is surprisingly smart. But then on the video that I'm on, it's like thousands of people going, I fucking hate dick, how Nick you're such a jackass. It's such a cold shit. It's like don't worry about any of it. It's always gonna be, whoever'm on, it's like thousands of people going, I fucking hate dick, how dick you're such a, it's such a shit gas. It's like, don't worry about any of it. It's always gonna be, whoever's on,

they're gonna be negative about. That's true, they all just like Nick. But I still have no confidence in any social situation, probably from a childhood of YouTube and video games. Well, it's probably something else, but I fear that if I don't figure out something soon, I'm going to enter my 20s as a kiss list, Lonely Virgin. Enter my 20s as a kiss list, Lonely Virgin. Any advice you have about getting pussy? Wow, he's gone from having no friends to getting pussy. That's a big kind of a big leap. Oh, we don't have planes yet

Let's go to the moon. How do you want you to get to planes first? Um, have you tried fucking a fat chick? Because no We mean no Have standards Fat chick's gonna fuck too, man. Look, I personally wouldn't fuck a fat chick. You'd fuck a fat dude. Yeah What the f-? Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats, Fats. Riley is gonna murder you, holy shit. What, Riley knows he's fat? I know I'm fat, it's a problem. Yeah, but you said it with such disrespect. Well, because she's saying like,

oh my God, a fat chick, I never fucking fat chick. Yeah, I fucked many fat chicks. Oh, you wanna say it? And I took that personally. Yeah, that's how I do it. It's, it's that a great, how's that working out for you? They've opened great ladies. That's a great, great you. They've opened great lays

What well someone to ten tons Is that what you're supposed to do? Is that the question? That chicks will do things that skinny chicks don't want it How would you know what you mean? How would I know how would you know that skinny chicks are willing to do just because I look I'm not gonna get what they do what with that chicks do that just because I look I'm not gonna get what they do what with fat chicks do they they're good at fucking huggy and bad they feed me the hoagie yeah they store it in their folds all I know is from experience if that's wild times with fat when you fuck fat chicks every leg is a bed breaker right is that the motto it's fun when you break the bed you know you can buy another bed break it the next day what's out if you could rank the best things about fucking bad chicks will be the top You break the bed, you know, you buy another bed break it the next day.

What's out if you could rank the best things about fucking bad shakes will be the top three. Well, I mean, every girl is different. I had one girl who was really into anal bone. That was pretty good. I wish you how heavy was she pretty heavy. I'd imagine the bad one. I wouldn't want to touch her her asshole at all I don't Know He has a brain

Different The Shit comes out of their asshole I don't Know Ever Yeah, it's clean shit Oh my god

Like grease the left like don't get down that's right Probably I don't even think he shits yeah, all right stores it I'm glad that your man is giving you clean shits man. What else? What else have you done with fat women besides anal just all? I don't know man. What do they do like that skinny women won't do? You're into like, you know, you want to get tied up, you want to get, you know. How do you tie them up like a big C world? Like, yeah, the last C world like that, well.

We got a big one. You have to go back to Hum D book because you don't have an on for rope when you tie them. Like, gosh, should I thought 50 feet would be good, but 50 feet for rope. How many pulleys do you need? You guys are very rude to these fat women. Some of them are gorgeous gals, and they deserve the world.

They are the world, you know. You guys are horrible. So you can tie them up. I know that I know they're ripping on fat chicks. It's like you're all over. What if you tie them up at a buffet? Is that like, I'll take them to the buffet. They have to stay flared at that point.

They have to do the difference. I'm fat. Run, I got them. Run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run,

run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run, I don't know. What do you mean I don't know? I don't know. I'm tying them up. What else? I'm tying them up. Rascal scooter racing. Bucking them. Fingering them.

Fingering them? Yeah. I don't know. No, it's getting even more like you figured. I wind up just having such a pretty kick. How far do you have to reach? It's pretty good. How have you ever been fingering one?

And they're like, that's not my vagina. That's a fold. No. That's my belly button. No. No. No. I'm my belly button. No. No, I'm an expert, I'm an expert at fingering. I'm really good at it.

That's your secret. All those years of playing Galaga. I'm like, I got. That's way too aggressive. That's so you would say that. Some girls don't, some girls don't even love it. Some girls. I'm like, that's too much, but I've had multiple girls

to be like, that was the fucking best ever. Yeah, they're trying to make you feel good. No, like, she came back like all the time and was like, please, please. That's called a relationship. That's the last thing you want. Well, no, we were, yeah, I was in a relationship with a girl

and I would, yeah. Gassing you off. It was, she was like, you. Fingerblast me so good. You fingerblast the shit out of me. And other stuff, she liked it all. Was there like, I added it to she was like you finger blast me so good finger blast the shit out of me and other stuff She liked it all was there like I added it sound like Spraying out like macaroni and cheese. There was some like trying to screw a hose onto a faucet That's already on I had to put a towel down. Yeah, oh, she was fat squirt. Oh

Oh, she was a fat squirt. She was a squirt. Oh, yeah. I mean, yeah, I know. I know it's urine. And I would tell her it's urine, and she's like, it's not urine. I'm like, it's definitely urine. It's just peeing all over my bed. Yeah.

Hey, but everybody had fun. That's what matters. Don't play the horn. No, playing something else. Do da da da da da da da da da da da da. It'll look like when the turkey comes out of the oven. It's nice. I'm playing something else. Doodadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadadad Yeah, I don't want to talk about shit anymore. You brought it up. Yeah, because you're fucking fat women. You brought up their assholes like ride away. Yeah, you're talking about that. You pressed me into, you're like, well, what do you do?

What do you do? And I'm like, I don't know, I don't know, a little angel or whatever. And the men's. That's not even like an acceptable answer for why you fuck fat girls. Oh shit, there's shit everywhere. And I'm like, no, there's not shit everywhere. I'm so fucking fat. And you're like, oh, and all this shit all over me. And there's shit everywhere. And I'm like, no, there's not shit everywhere. I'm sucking back. And you're like, oh, and all this shit all over me, and there's shit everywhere.

And I'm like, man, what is it you're talking about? You're like, when Riley shits on me, it's clean. It's a clean shit all over my chest. And he feels good about it. And they bust a load on top of it, and everybody's happy. I'll only let him piss on me. That's where I was like a very good show, because that's an erotic story from a real man. Okay, so go on.

No, I'm not going to spit it. I'm not going to spit it. Stupid bit. We already told look, I don't have any good sex stories. I've just had sex with fat women and it's been enjoyable. There's nothing wrong with that. How many pounds of women have you had sex with? Do you think if you had to name a number?

I don't know. That's a better number than like number of women. You have to say like, well how many pounds of women have you fucked? What's your weight count? What's your weight count? Your weight count. Your women, what's your body count? No, 2000?

I would estimate. So that's what, what, 800, 300 pound women? What's that? That's 800 pound. That's 800 pound. All, we're 300 pounds. Fuck you. All right, seven.

700 pounds. Okay.. All right, seven. Seven hundred pounds. Okay. It was one seven hundred pound woman. One three hundred pounds. I'm joking. Fuck you guys. Not big, too big for you.

I'm definitely not. Now, like, I don't know. Your size? Yeah, like my size. Like three hundred pounds? Okay. Well, not for women or shorter though, but like my general.

So, what size? I'm going to show you women, show you women you say yes, you know 400 pound woman. Let's see what that I mean I'm definitely gonna say no Yeah, no, no you sure No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no a compliment. How about this? Yeah, I'd fuck them. Ew. She makes you not have to fuck her. She looks fine. This? Yeah.

All right. What about us? Let's split the difference. Yeah, that works. This is a three and a half. This is a three and a half. It's basically five foot six. How about that girl?

No, no, no. What's she's got the sports preser? Thank you. I got it. I got it. All right, it's not. All right, let's try three, 25. I can't believe the categorize it like this.

Yeah, women are very proud of how much they weigh. Okay, here's how about this one? That's not three and a 25 pound. Yes, it is. And this is weight loss. So you know she's telling the truth about this. That's not three hundred twenty five pounds. She's hiding it underneath the coat. So is it yes? Yeah, I have to say that's not three hundred twenty pounds. There's no way. I don't know. She says it is. Look, three hundred twenty five pounds. That's three twenty five. Is that too big? That's too big. Okay, so

three hundred is the, all right. I like the pigs where all the women have lost their weight, which means they're doing the right thing. Nah, keep eating, stay healthy. No, stop eating, be on. Man, you gotta eat more. I fisted it a fight on. I feel like I'm rexia, it's easy.

I don't have anorexia, I work out. Okay, believe me, I don't throw up. Ever? Yeah. Cool. don't throw up. Ever? Yeah. Cool. Do you throw up? Yeah, all the time. Yeah.

Because my body's a toxic landmine. Yeah, you should probably get rid of it. I don't know. No, I'm not gonna let him. He's trying to cram so much stuff, Ed. I fear that if I don't figure it out for winter. It is winter. It is winter.

I don't know. I'm going to enter my 20s as a kiss list lonely virgin. You need advice you have about getting pussy making friends at college. I'm going to fuck a fat chick, but apparently that's the worst advice ever. It's on the 20 minutes. You can't get out of that once you do. Get out of it. You're stuck with it.

They're always going to be over on you. You can't get you can't get out of that once you do They're always gonna be over on you Well you got to go do some co-ed hobbies man stuff that you don't want to do join a Club or a group or a class Played musician go to a dude. That's too long. No, that's only men any Any music is just dominated by men. I play music my whole life, never met one woman because it was a fucking nightmare. Do co-ed sports, stupid shit, but clubs that women want to do.

Become gay. Become gay, pretend you're gay. That's a good one. Go to the Golden Corral. Harmful, find the girl who's sitting alone with two plates of pie. Yeah, I just sit down and go, got you a third. I had a girlfriend who got into the feeders

and though for some reason. Wow. Well feeding people or she wanted to be fed. What happened there? I don't know. She wanted you to feed her? No, no wanted to be fed. What happened there? I don't know. She wanted you to feed her? No, no, this was after we broke up. And she got into it.

How big was she? Well, she had really low self esteem because she was a fat girl and I was like, I'm like, well, you know, there's guys online or into fat girls. She's like, no, there's not. Like, yeah, there is. There's guys who have a fucking fetish for it.

She's like, no, there's not. And she started looking into it. She's like, oh, shit. She started posting pictures of herself on these websites and like, can you post a picture of you eating two hot dogs at the same time? She's like, yeah.

And then got really popular on this site. She felt better about herself that she ever did. And she's like, yeah, I've been getting into it because all these guys say I'm the hottest chick ever. And I'm like, at least I worked out, I guess. Nailed it. Yeah. So I think she's married now to like a skinny guy.

To a theater. That's kind of my, I kind of made that happen. Wow. Good job. Yeah, I really like helped her out. I mean, she probably shouldn't be in so much, but other than that, she's happy. Humry says, hey, Dick, did you see this? It's the, is it economically rational for ambitious women to try as

hard as possible to say thin that's a true I guess we're doing fat watch anyway watch today and fat news all this some wrestle brands that's the only thing I have no one do some voice males and get out of here it's almost three already yes uh... the economics of thinness oh my god God. You know, let's just voice me. I don't. I'll save that for Sean. He loves that stuff. I think that's why it's Sean. You can get over your flu. Kind of already did fat watch. Yeah. This

is God. I have so much stuff here. Oh, somebody put, this is a visual gag, I guess, but maybe it will work. Somebody sent me this. Let's see here. Okay. Dunlens of my four-year-old boy. Is Eric July talking to... In Tesla track.

Nikrakeeta. Because to preclude on the issue world, I'm not working. Is Eric July talking to Nikolakita That work now it doesn't really work in an audio format does it while you can't see Eric July talking That's a good bit just imagine it matches up perfectly. Yeah When I'm a pontificate known the Sasper loop Okay All right.

That's the show, I guess, everybody. Thanks for listening. Thanks for coming to show everybody that did come. Thanks for dressing up. If you did, man, do you want to show anything? Yes, I do. You look amazing. Thanks.

I do daily mover reviews. Every day, some PMET, YouTube.com slash ASC presents. But also, if you want to see me, you know, not being this stripping down and all fun sort of stuff, uh, fansley.com slash hitsman salad. Titsman salad. Kevin, do you have a fansley account that you want to know? You should.

No. Look at the shorts. Only five. Cause I slash feeder daddy 69, where I like to eat pie all day long. No, guys, go watch the live show. It was good. Bigs pro, one of eights. And, uh,

Niggler, do you have anything you want to, uh, any great niggals upcoming? Oh, yeah. I can't tell us exactly what they will. I can't tell you because you're my victims. Um, you can follow me at, uh, on the John on Twitter, I have a nice big collection of Eric July memes because I believe he needs to be made fun of

you know, excessively. You're trying to destroy his business? Yes. Okay. Trying to destroy the respect people have for him. I think that is a more. By the way, the idea that you can't like want to destroy someone's business is retarded.

They all want to destroy your candy. And Marvel want to destroy the Dodgers. Of course you can. And Marvon destroy the Dodgers. I want to drive them into bankruptcy. I'm going to do everything I can to do that. That's totally fine. Erickson, you can kill yourself if you think that. Did you want Erickson to get sued? Yeah.

Okay. Did you want to be the ultimate irony if Er Eric sued me for defamation in California and got butt fucked by a woke state's protection of free speech. Which Hollywood has made essential to the government in California. Because he knows how to lose him, maybe. Go for it, retards. I'm on the left now.

I'm woke now. And for now, I switched teams. I'm coming for fucking all of you now. And for me, ruining all of your fucking businesses. To biggest problem, he did admit he does not know who sent that stupid email, which means any case he was building against us is completely fucked. Yeah, Nick was like, who sent that,

so to Dick and Vito sent that email? I'll play it, I'll play it. Maybe, maybe, maybe. I don't know. I don't know, maybe. What I think I might have saved it here? So yeah, any legal action, which again, all of his followers for the past month have said, I can't wait for Eric July to sue you into the ground and take you for everything

you're worth. And then he's speculating on how we would pay for our lawyers and how Dick was going to fuck me over and all this other shit. And I'm like, something's wrong with Nell. Like he even retails. He retails stories and he doesn't have any of the facts. Correct. Dude, he's like, yeah, it just needs to be really sharp and on top of and like just like say facts that he was, but now he just seems to be. Everything is a reference to him and things he's doing, which is like actually skits a frenic. Where he's like, Oh, Eric July made the promo code pull up.

That's a reference to the time I told Nick Rukade to pull up on me. And it's like, no, it's not. No, it's a black reference. You're nuts. You got to let that side. He's got to let that psycho. Kiwi Farms is done. He needs to get a girlfriend.

Yeah. He needs to stop seeking out father figures and become the strong male figure which he so desires in his own life. He needs to become that strong man. I don't know, man. He just keeps desperately latching onto fake father figures. And then they have some minor thing where it's like, yeah, my co-host fucks women.

And he's like, oh my god! Oh my god! No, dude, calm the fuck down. Jesus Christ. Well, he also, he made that big deal about making like a thread on you. Yeah. And then they found that you got arrested for trying to run over a cop, which is like awesome. Yeah.

And then that you like go by your middle name. Yeah. It's like, yeah, you guys just, you look like fucking, you look like Harry Weak. It's so weird because then they post we've completely destroyed him. And I'm like, wait, how, what do you mean? What do you guys have to do? You found my arrest record three years ago, which I already talked, then they went, they're like, he's been hiding this for so long, he's must be devastated.

And then one of them goes, that year, I thought, my name makes me sick. I was mounted on Patreon three years ago. Literally three years ago on Patreon, he told his supporters what happened. So never mind, I guess he wasn't hiding it at all. So those guys, they were fun when they catalogued things that actually, they insane people were doing because they're funny. But when they started going after, like, East celebrities, yeah. They're going through my high school blog and being like, this is really cringe.

And I'm like, yeah, I wrote it in high school blog and being like this is really cringe and I'm like yeah I wrote it in high school. No shit, I'm motherfuckers. You can read it like it's funny. I've made it. I'm scared. It's like, well, weren't they like, oh my god he's talking about lolly and it's just you saying, ew it's queer. Yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm a bunch of posts from like, hey look at what Japanese people are into. They're fucking weird. I'm like, see, see, look at a, look at a, look at a, that's me specifically saying, I think,

Wally's fucked up. What are you talking about? We got him. Yeah, they really nailed me to the wall. Oh yeah, here's a yellow flash one. Let's see if that's a yellow flash, another retard. Whoops. Oh, I'm taking too much time, aren't I? There we go.

Showing up to people's homes, work, anything is kind of stupid. Well, especially in Texas. Okay, buddy. You're playing with your life, Dick. Riley's playing with his own life, man. How do you feel about that? It's funny. It's a little bit on the edge. You guys are like a modern day Bonnie and Clyde. Keep it up. I like funny jokes. Yeah, it is funny. I also like jokes. Guys, once again, fansley.com slash titsmancelid.

YouTube.com slash ASE presents. You really don't know how someone will react, even if you claim it's a joke. Mincella deserves a million followers. Oh, thank you, Vito. You do daily movie reviews. Yeah, there's a lot of work. All right that's the show everybody goodbye.

All right bye. All right. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey.

Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey.

Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey, Dick, my wife is also a teacher and today I learned something awful. I want to know if you're up there the same thing. I look at the moon this morning and say, oh, that's pretty cool. I tell my wife, hey, look at the moon. And she goes, oh, I know it's going to be the worst day ever. This is a wash because every time the moon is full, the kids act like jerks.

And as a way, you think the moon affects the kids and she's every time it's a full moon. Every time? I made the mistake of saying, do you think maybe it's you saying that there's a full moon thinking there's going to be a problem? And then you coming in with an attitude? Well, that's not fucking it. I can assure you that much. Anyhow, is 11 years too long for an old man because this is pretty fucking retarded. Anyhow, one or if your girlfriend is a sin thing.

No, she doesn't do that kind of retarded shit. Okay, or she hides it from me if she does, which is the best you can hope for. He did. and rage is neurology nerds listen to the bonus episode with uh... crossover of he gets to be a spot cast the financial feminist bitch oh my god outcome she gets to use ratios of like brain scans indicate how people are feeling when she clearly is not anywhere involved with this information whatsoever and she's a signal

you know men feel this way and women feel this way it's like that's what about certain and select a couple of green hibiscus thrown out a year ago to make a brain claims on sheet you don't understand you accomplish roles that you don't get it out of the problem of the problem yeah but myself it is

she is a couple more it's a case of a lack of better. We were at a baby deletion center. I'm sure a little bit. Probably upset about this, but go fuck yourself. Not everybody has the money to start a family. Alright, now anyway, we're here and our primary nurse is this, okay, this transgender last by the name of D.

It's not D. It's not D. It's not D. Yeah, so, um, wow. Yeah, so fucking this person, this thing, you know what? This fucking guy was a fucking creep. He was obviously like super kidding about everything being there. I am so fucking glad he wasn't doing the goddamn operation. he was obviously like super kitty about everything being there i am

fucking glad he wasn't doing the god damn operate uh... all my fucking god these specific don't be so angry my my wife was considering saying can i have a female nurse please and i would have been so fucking awesome uh... i wish you would have done it well the leaders can't be chosen as the creep should not have a job there it's obvious this bookers not only

artistic as fuck but like i'm sorry your abortion was not to like that maybe next time will be better for you uh... he had to do more two more minutes of that uh... k about this last one last one you know make me a rage that you appreciate this we had to be everyone stores yeah

i get you should probably are a pathetic caution on i'd be in people for a no you shouldn't have to care at all that's fine no but the idea everyone for I'm 41. I have gray hair. I don't look under 21.

Yeah. But even if you didn't know me, that's fine. The people know me. And they still have to pull off the eye to get onto your idea. Yeah, it's crazy, I know. That's a little bit too far. I ate your grandpa, war war two veteran came in

sure they stuck in one the idea yeah yeah so how old are you do we have to be so retarded to the least freaking confident person in the world we don't have to be just start shooting people them or they're fucking 88 uh-huh let it go yeah well I have to scan I have to see something got to scan it in the computer it's the rules says it right there we idea everybody why let me make them a sign a liar hey they call me lathered Latino I have the outrage this week it is celebrations of life uh... uh... girl in my school she was murdered uh... couple weeks ago and that

version of life and then my uncle died and we're gonna have a celebration of life for him and i just really hate this idea of a celebration of life but everyone they the family always says all they requested not to have a funeral all they want to do people to be happy people to get me for beyond the great with the shit how annoying real reason is they didn't want to put up the money for a few

uh... really the worst part of the house of party no one getting drunk the food sucks it's a cheap all and guess what a funeral is you know it's not but it's like an hour long. Maybe less It's sad, you know people they honor the person right this party The one I just went to it was four fucking hours, and you know what everyone was still sad No one was having a good time

fucking fuck Anyway, that was just faster than that. Yeah, I'm done. That's on you man It just sounds like a shitty celebration of life party, right? That's because it's not, the name isn't happy enough. They need to call it something better. Like this is a Mando spectacular extravagant celebration of life. That would pet people up and not remember that someone is dead.

Yeah, spice it up, get a cough and that pops the body up. Yeah, yeah. Because you decorate. You can chip, bowl the chips in the chest cavity. Yep, yeah. Simple stuff, simple stuff. All right, guys, thanks for coming. Thank you.

Thank you for doing the show. Thank you. Thank you, man. Everything you do. Okay, thank you. Okay, thank you. Join me in this, fansley. Do that.

More comedy pranks will occur if you do. Oh, if you sign up, there will be more comedy pranks. Yeah, Riley has all the ideas. At warehouses? Yeah, possibly. And related things. Oh, wow. I don't want to spoil too much.

I can see Riley setting up like a fake toll booth to get into the warehouse parking lot. Ah! Ah! All right, goodbye, everyone. to get into the warehouse park. Ah! Ah!

Ah! All right, goodbye, everyone.