The Dick Show - Episode 43 – Dick on Pranks

Episode Date: March 28, 2017

Download the MP3 The clap, the Dick Show Tattoo, pranks, the mayor of chick town, the Dickbute, the creators of the 8chan list, another nonsensical rant about healthcare, Denzel can’t skate, morons at intersections, “letting you go” and workplace suggesters, an invasion of space aliens, NHS, fraud, Loudmouth Leah, a Road Rage update, a billboard … Continue reading "Episode 43 – Dick on Pranks" The post Episode 43 – Dick on Pranks appeared first on The Dick Show.

Hey Presenting Yeah Welcome to Dig. You got Dig right up in your ear. You want Dig, you love Dig, you need Dig. You got it, it's the show. Where everything is a contest.

Come to you live from a concrete bunker and a side of a mountain in the city of failure. I'm your host, Dick Masterson. With me is always a Sean, the audio engineer. Hello, Dick. Hey, what's up, buddy? It's the only show where you can get the comedy stylings of Sean, the audio engineer. Hello dick. Hey, what's up buddy, it's the only show where you can get the comedy stylings of Sean, the audio engineer.

Many, many other podcasts want him. Many other podcasts try to replace the zingers of Sean, the audio engineer there. But I still show up here every week. You still show up here every week for some reason. Joining me today is the whole host with the most. Thensel walks, how you doing? I'm fantastic dick.

Hey, good to see you buddy. I don't believe that. I don't believe that. Let's start. How you doing? I'm fantastic, Dick. Hey, good to see you, buddy. Good to see you, Luke. I don't believe that. Let's start. This was a high energy week. Oh my God. This was a... That was all the energy he could must have done. That's it for the show.

This is, I know him. I know the real Denzel. This was the kind of week where the energy backs up. And I need multiple... I need... There's so much shit going on that I need multiple devices. I'm, I'm tweeting, I'm shit storming and shit posting from my computer. I'm shit posting from another computer.

I'm on my phone while these computers are executing my shit postery. I'm on my phone coordinating more shit posting, reading about the effects of these these of the two computers shit posting at once I'm calling people and having them getting getting updates from the field of shit posting in prankery because it's the season of pranks you understand coming up on April one April fulls day where when we will be releasing the mad cucks episode called one, oh wait, the Patreon exclusive bonus episode one, oh wait, but that's the kind of high energy week. It was this week jamming. You know when you, you know when you go to bed and you're on your laptop, finishing up,

reading all the emails of the day and you're, you're filtering them, you're applying your little tags on the emails, saying, oh, that's done. That's not done, but, but I feel better now that there's a stupid little tag on this one that said that it's, I've categorized it. I've categorized my lethargy and procrastination and failure. I've categorized it into important, not important. Now job done.

Now it's time to go to bed. Now I close this laptop and I graduate to the phone where I do additional cataloging of my failure. That's, and then I drift off. I drop the phone onto my face a couple of times as I'm drifting, then it's time for sleep, right? Not this week, too much going on this week. All computers on all the time

to start road rage. Philly has sold, you know, last time, last week, I tried to, we tried to do our road show road rage. Philly and I tried to do a simple ticket sales. Yeah. Throw up the tickets, get a little venue and Philly, have a little get together, at a coffee shop I figured, just, you know, just a typical stupid me. I'll just get the first, first, little coffee shop. That's where we're gonna assemble the dickheads in a, in a little coffee shop where everybody can sip

on a nice espresso, maybe we'll have 50, 60 people in there. I'm plenty of room to breathe, right? And 50, 60 people would be great. Maybe it would be great. Or it would be thrilled about 50 or 60 people showing up in any given town. That'd be like, yeah. Okay. You can't expect more than that.

You can't expect more than that. We'll gather around. We'll listen to some soft jazz. Talk about our favorite books. We'll talk about Bayo Wolf. We'll read the news together. Hey, did you see this? Oh, yeah, yeah.

Well, did you see the headlines this week? We'll say, yeah, I saw it. I don't feel strongly one way or the other about it. Because I'm not allowed to. Yeah, because I just like to go right down the middle. That's what the, and that's what we call it a show, right? Yeah. Wrong.

Sold instantly sold out. The last road rage instantly sold out in a couple of hours. Well, everyone was asleep. Wow. That's what everyone was asleep. Right. Everyone got asked that. Knuck in there and bought up all the tickets.

That's super awesome. So only, only the late night masturbators, only the, only the late night jack-off time wizards who were stuck in a five hour rut. You know what I mean? When you're looking for that one, put in your going and you're going, you really get stuck as Chinese Tony says, the jerk off time warp. Only those guys who lasted until five a.m. and then finally, they saw a road rage Philly pop up and they're like, all over the keyboard. I got it. I got it. I got those tickets, only those guys got tickets to the last one. I said, oh, fuck, okay, I blew it, I blew it again.

Let's get the biggest venue there is, right? Yeah, Beaty Beats, do you remember him? A DJ, a DJ who's made some remixes for this show. Beaty Beats, Beaty Beats, their beats and their beaty. He is a DJ in the Philly area. So he goes, hey man, I'm gonna hook you up. I got all the, I got all the connects. I know everybody in Philly.

He's Mr. Philadelphia, a beaty beats. So he said, here's what you're gonna do. Here's a venue, 200 people. Do you think that's gonna be enough? And I said, I don't know, man, I fucked this up before. I fucked it up before not getting enough, right? I'd rather be embarrassed with a like one tenth full venue than have to do this a third time.

I'd rather be it just me and shun you as the fucking things up. Yeah, but I don't want to fuck it up the same way twice, right? Always fuck it up. That's the work of a tree neck track. A tree fuck up. Yeah, because then you didn't, then you're telling everybody that you didn't learn anything. You didn't know you it up. That's the work of a tree, a tree fuck up. Yeah, because then you're telling everybody that you didn't learn anything. You didn't know you fucked up.

Maybe you thought the fuck up was different. You gotta never fuck up the same way twice. No. No matter what it takes, because everything in your brain, everything that you've learned, everything that I've learned in 36 years, led me to fuck it up that one way once.

I'm like, all right, I gotta, in order to fuck it up that one way once. I'm like, all right, I got to, in order to fuck it up a different way, it's gonna hurt. Like, it's gonna feel wrong. And because the first way I did it, it felt correct. Yeah, and that's what, that was me. And I look at it and say, well, that's a fuck up. So you say, you got to fuck it up a different way, which means taking everything that you think is right

and flipping it around, like opposite day. Like the Kastanza. Exactly like the Kastanza. The Kastanza's way to live. So it's like, all right, no, it's not 200 because that feels comfortable for me. So let's get way out of our comfort zone. What's the biggest venue you got?

Just let the ego go completely unchecked. You do it, you make all the decisions. So BDB's goes, all right, we get the trocadero. It seats, seats a lot of fucking people. It seats a lot and we'll go with the upstairs at the trocadero. It seats max 250 people. You can cram into this venue up top, right?

Because they got the main stage and they got the venue up top, like the little, the lounge area. Yeah, for the smaller acts, right? So I say no. We're getting the big theater, a giant fucking theater that might as well be Carnegie Hall. It's the Carnegie Hall of Philadelphia.

That's what we're doing. That's what we're getting. Make, do it. That's what we're doing. Beaty Beats, all right. You know what I mean? Beaty Beats is making it happen. Make do it. That's what we're doing. BD beats. All right, you hear the man? BD beats is making it happen. So BD beats gets the trocadero on the phone.

Done, they say, all right. Here's your tickets. You gotta charge up the ass for these tickets because this venue is expensive. People come in here, they charge up the ass for it. I say, no, $5 tickets. Everybody, $5. $5 tickets, everybody, this is a big party,

it's a party, everybody's invited. $5 bucks, easy decision, just something to keep, just enough to keep out the sons of bitches and the silly pants is who are buying tickets to fuck with you, because you can't make it free, you know, then assholes, a lot of assholes like to fuck with this show. I don't know why, we we just mind our own business every week Yeah, just minding our own business talking about what makes us a rage people are fucking what this from all angles Sean All angles people are fucking with us trying sending in sending in people who are a part of this show sending sending bullshit to where they work

Calling people terrible things for no just because they have the audacity to be on the show It's fucking awful. It's fucking awful It's fucking awful then so I can't believe this five bucks Patreons get a special patreon price say do it. They're like no no no no no you can't you're crazy You can't do it. You're giving these tickets away. You can't do this So I say you fucking do it you do it. You put it up there you put it up there as Of today it was up. You know what I think? They put it up. I don't want to complain too much about it, but they put up the wonderful girl that I'm working with over the track

of the day. She puts up the tickets. And I'm like, yeah, let's get it launched. It's Tuesday. Everybody's waiting. Let's get it launched as soon as possible. Puts it up. I see the little countdown thing on the ticket, the ticket page, it says tickets will be ready for sale at 4 p.m. or something like that. So I'm waiting counting down 4 p.m. As soon as it hits 4 p.m. I launch all the tweets and the Facebook and the post.

There you go, everybody, time to buy tickets. Door's open. But here they are. Here they are. I hope everybody's happy, we made it work, and they say, hey, Dick, there's a problem. So what do you mean there's a problem? Well, the tickets are close.

So I go back to the ticket page, and it says, oh, tickets are closed for another hour. Oh, hey, sweetheart, what happened here? And she goes, oh, I just wanted to test that it worked, and it did work, and then I bumped the timer for another hour. Do you want me to open it back up? And I'm like, yes, yes, yes, yes, open it back up,

open it back up. No response. Oh, that's as I'd await the, just like, so I'm sitting there obsessively hitting F5 while 80s girls making dinner, like, you know, trying to make conversation with somebody who's stretched out like the thinnest eve like the thinnest violin string over a double bass like you know my hair is like sticking out like Kathy. I'm like I got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got got And as of, I think yesterday we've sold 278 tickets, 280 tickets. So thank God that we didn't get the other venue. That's funny.

It's unbelievable. How large is the venue now? Well, the truck is narrow. I think it's, I think it's seed 600. Oh wow. You want to go. Get your ass to ticket. Yeah, go buy them tickets, dog.

Got a lot left. Bring a friend. Bring a friend. Bring a friend and get ready to buy a shirt because that's the only way we're gonna get in the black on this black thing. It's a big shirt con. I'm gonna turn up the air condition

and that trocadero, I'm gonna say, you turn that air conditioning to 30 fucking degrees. I need people buying six, seven shirts just to keep warm. We're gonna be selling Dick show hot chocolate. Uh, $40 a glass. We're gonna be selling personal space heaters that make the sound to Dada Dada as they as they heat you up. Special edition, Dixia, all right. I'd like to see you back, Denzel. How's your podcast going? My podcast is great. You can join us on the subreddit at reddit.com slash rslash real nerd hours.

You can follow the show on Twitter at xreal nerd hours. You can follow me on Twitter at that Denzel and my co-host chat is at Bushido Brown. Show's going pretty well. And I'm not gonna lie to you, man. And there haven't been too many like rape accusations this week. Not in the order. Not yet. Yeah. Real nerd hours. It's called.

Yes. Real nerd hours. We're on iTunes, Google Play, SoundCloud, a lot of places. All those places that I listed about the Twitters and the subreddits, those all have the links on them. Listen to the show. I'd probably say started episode six. And you guys talk about what nerd stuff? Yeah. There was an instant, sewer, friend of mine, licked a boot.

Licked a boot? Licked a boot. Okay. Because he was thirsty, like, thirsty in the sexual way. Tell a story about that. We went into last week. Oh, you looked at licked a boot to impress a woman?

Yes. Did it work? No. I can't work. You know what? You know what? It is with women. This is this is this is what I can compare it to Like Henry Ford always said if I listen to customers, I would have built a faster horse You don't heard that saying that's a good saying. Yeah, that's I always apply that pretty much all of Henry Ford's thinking I apply

Yeah, that's, I always apply that, pretty much all of Henry Ford's thinking I apply to women. It's like, if they want you to lick their boot, you gotta figure out why they want you to lick their boot and give them that, or at least make them think they're gonna get that. You don't just lick the boot, because then the boot's been licked. Yeah.

You know, then what's in it for you? Nothing. You know what I'm talking about? You get a guy talking about it on his podcast. Yeah, you get a guy talking about a podcast. You also took my advice for roller skating, is that right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, went roller skating and didn't turn out that well.

I'm not gonna lie. Multiple problems arose. One, I can't roller skate. Exactly, I can't roller skate. So what did I do? Eight shit six times in one night within maybe about 40 minutes. Were you wearing like a little 70s roller skating outfit? No, no.

I wish I was. And that was about seven feet tall. Six four. Yeah. But if I had on bell bottoms and like a nice silk shirt that's open at the top, that would have made it more funny. You fell on your ass all night? Yes. It was fucking awful.

And on top of that, I don't know why I decided to do this, but the roller skating rink every Tuesday has adult night. Okay, right? And that's when adults come to skate, no kids are allowed or whatever, they're not serving alcohol because you don't want to drink while you're rolling. Dude, if you are roller skating,

you do want to drink and roller skate. Man, you will lose, everyone will lose their teeth. You're talking about 20 people who will leave their looking like anime face people. Like, no, it's squished completely into the back of their heads. Yeah, it will solve the roller skating outbreak. So you went to adult night,

were there your handshicks there at least? No, you know what? What are you talking about? There were, so let me explain something. Okay. No, you're down and this is down in the San Diego area. San Diego, this is hot chicks down there. Not at a roller skating rink and not at the only one in San Diego.

There were two problems, right? Okay. Because it was adult night and it was a Tuesday. Coincidentally, the week after you would recommend it, I go, I went and that Tuesday, it was Valentine's Day. It's a first mistake, okay. Yeah, so I mean, and on top of that. You gotta go to a bar on Valentine's Day. Gotta go to a...

Singles, bar, somebody puts something in me. Singles night, bar, write the fuck now. I didn't plan for this. Please help me. God singles night ladies night bar on Valentine's Day. I'll have to check that out next year. Valentine's Day is not fun, man. Valentine's Day is that drought is, it's the, it was a wild kingdom, the drought is coming in. The will to beasts are out looking for a little scrape of food, a taste of water. So they're licking off leaves, man. That's Valentine's Day.

Situation is dire. Licking boots out here. Licking boots. Does your thirsty? Yep. Yeah. Oh, god. Henry Ford told you to do it.

I guess there were a lot of mistakes that I've made. Like I did actually go to a singles event with or event, quote unquote, was one of the listeners of the dick shows names Andy He came he came through and invited me to like is he does like a friends of friends thing Where everybody gets together and goes out bar hopping with each other? Yeah for good old time It was a good time, but I mean I ended up fucking that up as well because as it turns out Women don't like being ribbed. Can't be.

You like teased? Yeah, teased. We were teasing each other at a certain point. Some guy comes over and asks for a point. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no not a funeral book, but close. I was at wedding too. I can't wait for the Sean O'Like contest and Philly. I can. That's gonna be great. Dark jeans, V-neck, boots, stress boots, and zingers. I mean, I will get, can you imagine five Sean O'Likes

and then like a little Sean O'L would make that would make the event for me if we got a little shana like a Philly road rage oh my god I would die happy you know I'd like a dwarf is that what the name is well I think Joel Chaco has a line on that kind of yeah I don't know if we can get if we can get a little. If we can get a little, yes, if we can get a little shine alike, oh my God, I'd be so fucking happy. So is that a memorial service? Yes, today with 80s girl. And there was this woman gets up to do a tribute. I get beautiful song, right? And she's singing, she's singing the song.

She's very heartfelt and soulful. And then she goes, all right, everybody, if I could just get your help on this song, everybody I need you to clap with me. But, oh God, here we go. See how white was this female. Oh, Sean, I can, I, did they clap it on one, three?

I instantly looked out and it was like, I'm like, okay, Mexican, Mexican, Mexican, boom. I see the white chicken in the back and I'm like, oh, Mexican, Mexican, Mexican, boom, I see the white chicken in the back and I'm like, oh, I know you're gonna fuck this. 10, like three beads into the clapping. This bitch is in the back, swing, the wrong time, just applauding. Like a poor singer is up, you know,

the soul singer is up there singing this jazz and she's like snapping, snapping away, trying to keep everybody on the beat as I'm doing now And you can see her like here you can see her here the beat starting to get fucked up in a wave by this one woman in the bag Who's not even drunk? She's just just white. She's just like it's not and none of her claps are in time She doesn't notice that the woman's clapping at completely the wrong time. So I'm trying to help this woman out

by getting like aggressive, like, A-A-A-A-A-A. This is what we're doing. We're doing it in time. And now it's like a clap war at a memorial service. Two and four, two. Where the snare goes on two and four. Not one and three.

Stop moving around. get the beat first before you start swaying around like a waggy waving inflatable arm failing tube man, like stay with it. Everybody's doing, so she's, and now there's people like you can see looking at her and then looking at the same, like, oh, well I don't wanna,

it's like I don't want to tell her she's wrong. So I'm just gonna have like a weird kind of a rhythmic clap in the middle. Like and now you've got this flams everywhere. Flams, it's mattering of a pattern. It's a matter of a song and this poor woman is up there snapping and like it's now it just sounds fucked. Like it, cause there's no beat at all.

Was the song a standard, like a standard gospel song? Yeah, like a, yes. It was a standard gospel song. Okay. Nice and slow, a pocket, the size of the grand canyon to sit in. And she's up there with the audible baton, leading it on in every, every,

because it happens every time. And I don't know why anybody ever asks for audience participation when they can see one fucking white, one white chick in the audience is like, everybody, I need to serve what you get. That's a red card, dude. You know what's gonna happen? That's a red race card.

You've read card, yeah. I'll find that's a bit for the old show. That's trademarked, you can't bring that into the new show. So, every time time I'm like, what do you just need to sit up there and say, Hey, everybody, I need your help unless, unless you are a white woman in the back who is really into the music, then just sit this one out. Just, just sit it out like fake, just fake clap. If you're, if you have a history of,

if you think you might not be on the beat, just fake clap a lot. There's no need to actually put your hands together. You can pretend. Don't even fake clap. Just leave your arms down. Like a child with a steering wheel. Like you give the kid the steering wheel in the car

and they could pretend to drive. Well, you know, mom and dad are actually doing the driving while the musician is up there. And there's a shit mode of it was a memorial service for a musician. So there's two dozen musicians there like everybody, chowing down on some of the food, and I go over and I was like, hey, you have those, a very beautiful song. Things kind of got a little messy with the clapping part.

And she's like, yeah, it always does. But it makes people happy that they could be a part of it. That's why I do it. Yeah, okay, so you knew that was gonna happen. Yeah. You did it anyway. You did it anyway. So we gotta do something like that at the show.

Have BD beads do a sing along with us or something like that. Yeah. Have everybody just clap wrong. Clap wherever you want. Wherever you want. You ever clapped before? Yeah, it's given a shot. If you're the first timers, don't worry about it.

It's loud as possible. It's excited as possible. Go ahead and shit all over this song. I'll tell you what else makes me raise this week. Health insurance. Oh, no. Man, I don't understand what the big debate is with health insurance.

I really don't. Everybody knows what's going on with health insurance. You know what's going on with health insurance. You see all this anti-Obama cares shit. Yeah, sure. Going on. Paul Ryan, which I think, I think that, I hope this is true. I think that Trump let Ryan care, Ryan, Paul Ryan, fuck up to undermine him. Like I don't know. I doubt anybody follows it as closely as me, but when I said, like, huge catastrophe for Trump and for Republicans, I'm like, I'm looking at this.

I know what I would do if I was Trump, because I hate Paul Ryan. I would let him fuck up a seven year fuck up. I would let him do. You know what I mean? Just to try to cost him that speaker, the house role, because he's such a weasily little prick. Yeah, he is. Like, yeah, I guarantee you that's what he's thinking because he doesn't seem that upset about it.

Trump was like, up, there's our last chance, everybody better come together and then it didn't work out. He's like, I, no big deal. He was surprisingly not upset. Yeah, for a guy who just can't help himself. For a guy who gets upset about Meryl Streep shitting on him,

like he doesn't seem to care that healthcare went down. Anyway, here's what makes me a rage about it. Not too long ago, I remembered getting a survey on how satisfied I was with my health insurance. And they said, we're releasing a new site, so you can get more involved with your health insurance.

Hey, here's our, we've set up a new portal. And we've got this clip art of this Asian broad, who's reading mail that I guess is health care, who looks like mail that I guess is healthcare, who looks like the healthiest mother fucker on the face of the earth, reading an email, having a sip of coffee. This is what they're broadcasting, and they're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

This is what you guys think you are, but the survey was like, here, how satisfied are you with your health insurance? It's one to 10. I looked at it and I was confused, not because of the 10, which, which being confused as max satisfied and dissatisfied, but there was no option for, I wish that my health insurance was a man and that I was driving down the road in a pickup with a baseball bat so I could just hit him so hard in the back of his head.

It would shoot off into outer space. That's how satisfied I am with my health insurance. I want to take everything bad that with everyone, everything wrong and give it to you like a curse. I want there to be a gypsy curse that I could inflict on you, because you're all, it's not that you're, it's not that you're scumbags. For not a job. Yeah, I would like God to smite you.

Whoever is in charge of healthcare, I want God to smite them nonstop and every kind of plague imaginable what? I wish there wasn't God. So what problem do you have with your health insurance? It's a scam. It's a scam perpetrated on the young. You ever paid for health insurance?

I'm paying for it now, yeah. Yeah, you ever get anything out of it? Yeah. What do you get out of it? Drugs. What do you full of drugs? Adderall and get some sweet addies and some Xanax. You know how much you're paying for that shit?

A lot. There's not much, the average person pays 10 grand a year. Like three trillion dollars from paying in health insurance every day. Hold on, do you say trillion with the two? Three trillion motherfucker. That's how much money we're paying on health insurance and none of us are using it.

All right, fuck it, burn it all down. Burn it all the fuck down. That's exactly what I'm saying. The debate that they're having about whether or not we're in an Obamacare makes absolutely no sense to me. Like the, I see the freedom caucus, these idiot libertarians waiting into the, waiting into the mix and saying, oh, we're gonna, we're gonna stump it no matter what, because

people should have the right to not buy health insurance. And I'm sitting there going, motherfucker, so then what? Like then they get sick and they just die. Like what, what the hell are you talking about? What the fuck are you, do you wonder why people hate libertarians? And you're sitting there like, you don't, you don't have to be that smart to see the cause and effect here. Not like we never do that with anything else. We're blowing trillions of dollars in the military every fucking year and people just, up, up, people should have the right to just get sick and die. Like, can you pull your head out of your ass for ten

and wear the fuck was this, where's was this attitude on weed? Where's this attitude on drugs? Why do I never get anything that I want and all the sudden, like all the sudden, now you're fighting for liberty? All the sudden, now you're fighting for like, oh, people should have the right. People should have the right to enter into a scenario that's never gonna happen. It's fucking bullshit. It made me, it made me so upset that and the pre-existing condition shit being lumped into insurance like motherfucker, you don't need insurance, you need healthcare. You don't need to buy, you're not buying car insurance after your car is wrecked.

You got to, there's like every time, every time this gets brought up, it's a never ending succession of stop stories. Well, I wouldn't be able to have insurance because my wife was born without a head and she gets denied health insurance wherever she goes. Yeah, because that's not insurance dipshit. She needs around the clock health care. Me a fucking break. It's such bull. So I, this is what it, this is what it is to like this is when I say I want to get in a pickup truck and drive down the road and a club, home run, Derby, the physical personification of healthcare

until their head pops off of their head. I mean, because I've never had a good, I've never had an experience that I've enjoyed with it. Go to the doctor, get something checked out. I get my ankles been fucked up for years my, my ankle's been fucked up for years. Yeah, my right ankle's been fucked up. It was, it's been fucked up. I've broken it a couple of times.

I've read a marathon as fucked up after that. It's been, it's been fucked up my whole life always hurts. I finally go to the doctor. They run all their stupid tests on it, you know, $1,000 MRIs. That for some reason cost That for some reason cost, for some reason cost, that they build a completely different amount

to an insurance company as they do if you were to just pay for it out of pocket. Oh yeah, and you know what? I mean, not even has nothing to do with what it costs. And they, you ask them that. You say, hey, why did you bill me? Why'd you bill me $100,000 for this surgery? And they say, well, don't worry about it. Bill your insurance. We're going to we're building. We're sending you a bill. You only have to pay $2,000.

We're sending the rest to your insurance company. Yeah. And they're going to cover 20%. And I'm like, you know that. And I'm like'm like yeah that's how and we put a hundred grand because we know they're only gonna cover 20% and that's how much it costs To do the surgery and I'm like yeah bitch. That's called fraud What are you talking about you know, and she's like no no no no no no no no no no no no no this this I mean this conversation I have to me. I was like that's called we doing is called insurance fraud like you think I can do that I can't do that with my car. My car got broken into. They stole my Picasso painting. I had a cure for cancer in there that was worth about 50 billion, 100

billion dollars. I had Mickey Manell's jersey, the last jersey that he played in. I just know, I had a couple hundred billion dollars worth of stuff, right? Well, we're gonna cover 1% of that, right? Like, that's, oh, that's allowed because that's what I had to do to get the money that I knew I was owed for a new car. That's fucking fraud. Anybody else does that? They're going straight to jail.

And the whole industry is built on it. So she goes, well, you know, don't worry about it. You get freaked out. I was having the surgery on my face, because it was too big. So I was having them shrink down. Yeah, reduction. I looked freakish.

My eyes were on the sides of my forehead. Yeah, like this. My mouth was, my mouth was so big that it took up my entire neck, like all the way across under my nose and all the way down like venom. Yeah. That's what I looked like before. It was like hard, hard, hard, hard, hard, hard.

I mean, if anything, they made it a little bit too small, but I mean, that's the risk. That's the risk you run. Thank you. So she goes, oh, it's 100 grand. Well, it's not 100 grand. It only costs us 22,000, 25,000 bucks, but we gotta say it's $100,000.

Just so they'll pay it. And I'm like, well, 25,000 bucks, but we gotta say it's $100,000. Just so they'll pay it. And I'm like, well, okay. So that's obviously fraud. And you're doing this how many times a day? 10 times a day, just running up millions of dollars in charges that could be done for pennies, for that could be done for 20%, 10%. Like that's what you're asking for, the second the second my second problem with it was

This the actual amount that you're charging me for this is less than what I've been dumping into my health insurance all year That's the worst part. That's the fucking worst part my premiums are something like That's the fucking worst part. My premiums are something like 130 right now, right? And my co-pays are $40. But if I decide to pay to 10 a month, then my co-pays just go down to $10. It doesn't make any fucking sense. I'm not saving all that much money.

You're making a shit load of money off of me. Where does that money go? You make a shit load of money. And your work covers this, right? No, I pay out a pocket for it. They cover an X percentage of it. But you get health insurance through your work. Yes.

Okay. Which it has to be because they just own, they become your broker, your job. Would you ever let your job buy you lunch when your work does like mandatory, fun fried Fridays. It is absolute shit the food that you get Where's the chicken coming from? What the lousy and why did you bring up fried chicken? Fucking Friday because it's fish Friday Sean. It's fish Friday. I'm a God fearing Catholic. That's why right.

I'm a God-fearing Catholic, that's why I brought it. Falea Fish Friday. Falea Fish Friday. It is the absolute worst. It is the food that some H.R. idiot just out of college who does not give a fuck about anything but getting this email out before five o'clock. It's the food that that chick picked for you. Every other thing that your company gets for you is the worst and fucked and a nightmare.

Yet they run everybody's health insurance. Every gotta point, you've gotta point. My dental is trash. My health insurance is pretty bad as well, but I'm stoked because I got these neat glasses. Those glasses do look sick. Oh, thank you. Fenzel, you gotta tell him.

I don't know. It's, they act surprised about every part of it too. Every part of health insurance, they act surprised at. And it's all bullshit. You ever work on set and have a PA order food? Like terrible. Yeah. It's barely acceptable.

They make the worst decisions. As somebody who is aspiring to be someone big in whatever industry, whatever assistant, or whatever, just ordering the worst fucking food. Like one time, for instance, I can't eat pork and I can't have dairy. And so I tell the PA this, right? What's the PA do? Oh, let me get pepperoni pizza. Let me get bacon, cheddar pizza, or whatever the fuck. These everything with pork and dairy on it. And it's

what kind of decision making process do you go through day to day to get out of your bed, to start your car, to get dressed? What do you do? How do you live? I read this interesting article. My life coach, I was complaining about this on text and he sent me this, my life coach sent me this interesting article where Oregon, which I think is pretty smart, Oregon has a list for their health care. They got a prioritize list of everything that there could be. They got pregnancy right at the top, substance abuse on there.

They got like, fucky eyelids on there too. You get eyelid surgery. You get eyelid problems. And they take all the money. One, two, and three, huh? Just like that. They take, it's a thousand things. It's a list.

A thousand things that can be wrong with you. And they prioritize them based on like, obviously, babies are the top, right? Of terrible things that can happen to you? Yeah, exactly. Catastrophic insurance. Life running. Yeah, some of the needs catastrophic insurance coverage.

No one. The existing condition. Yeah. Well, it's a fucking pre-existing condition. So, this defrazes stupid. It's like, no, you're not, it's a fucking pre-existing condition. So this the phrase is stupid. It's like, no, you're not, it's not insurance anymore. You just want money, which I'm fine with, but it's not like, don't call it insurance.

What are you getting into? You're not ahead. You, there's a guarantee that you need medical care. So they ran in Oregon, they rank everything. I don't know how they do it. They get like a bunch of, they get the top autists to rank all these health problems. And then they say, well, how much money do you have?

You know how to contest. It is a contest that the people with, the people in the oil is, are fighting pregnant brods in Oregon to get their thing ranked, you know, higher. Like the guys with, the guys with, because if they just keep their fucking legs shut,

then it wouldn't be it right I mean if you get a no more Orc human they can't close their eyelids. Yeah, they don't have eyelids. They're like well We can we can we can't even shut our eye. I don't have a choice you chicks can close your legs Yeah, very it's a very aggressive medical campaign. They have up there They take all the money militant to fucking eyelid people and then they draw line They say we can afford this much Yeah, they take all the money militant to fucking eyelid people. And then they draw a line. They say, we can afford this much.

I'm done. And we draw, they draw a line in the list and say, everybody else, you're fucked. Try argue your case harder, but this is what we can afford. Because I'm thinking, like, Mark Cuban goes out and says, like, oh, healthcare should be right. There should be, we need to pass an amendment. So healthcare is a, is a right. It should be, we need to pass an amendment. So healthcare is a right. I'm thinking, I have never had,

I am the least satisfied person in the world with my healthcare. I've been dumping into it my whole life. I go to the doctor for one to try to look at my ankle, not only is it not fixed, but it cost me three grand. And when I call him up to say, why the fuck am I getting a bill for this when I've been dumping money into you,

like a chump, like a chick, who will never put out, where are you on this? They are the opposite, I call it a fucking criminal. It's fucking criminal. It's fucking criminal and I, it is. It is fucking criminal. And I want to shoot him into space. If we're colonizing Mars, take everybody that works for the healthcare

Company and start catapulting them at the little red dot Rocket space suits don't need them because you guys are all bad. Yeah, you're more Reviled than Nazis like if I if I see anybody's I'm like, oh, it's not you know, you know They don't it. It's just not a problem. Healthcare person makes me see red instantly, because all they do is try to fuck you. Exactly the same way car insurance, credit card companies man, they will butter you up. They want you to have the, I call AMX,

like hey, there's been fuckery with my credit card. Some asshole took out, some asshole's buying McDonald's at four in the morning after running up a bill of experiment, Rhino, sir, we'll check, we'll check into this for you immediately, sir. I get evidence that it was me. I call the health insurance, I'm like, yeah,

you guys fucked up on my thing. I'm getting this enormous bill. What are you gonna do about it? I don't know, not our problem. Not our fucking problem. Who's problem is it then? Sir, are you sure you even have feet? Yeah.

Are you sure that you, you know, why don't prove it? Send me some pictures of your feet. Prove that this was you. It's fucking awful. So the end result is what, you're on the hook for money right now, as of this moment. We're on the hook for money.

No, no, no, I mean, in this particular case. Oh, I already paid it. I mean, there was no getting out. You paid three fucking grand? Well, because they see what they do is, in this particular case. Oh, I already paid it. I mean, there's no getting out. You paid three fucking grand. Well, because they see what they do is in this instance, the doctor who runs the MRI that for some reason costs $7,000 more in LA than it costs anywhere else in the like a true what New York and now the machine is sitting there all day. It's not wasting, it's not wasting electrons. It's not wasting magnets sitting there. Just run the goddamn thing all day. Like why, why, why does it cost so much

more because of the technician? Send it to fucking India, like every other call center, send it, send it anywhere in the world, but just stop acting like this is some kind of a precious resource that I'm hoarding for everybody They sent me to physical therapy Who said the first thing they said is oh you only get 45 minutes in here because that's all Medicaid Covers and now our whole practice catered Cater's to Medicaid. All right. Yeah, they They tell you right away like right away. They just don't expect any more than that. Like we're not gonna give you, you're not getting the full treatment. Just by the way, we're gonna start at partial treatment

and then probably, probably pass you out of that. You can warm up on your way in. Just do these, here I'm gonna show you massages and you do them in the car because what we decided as an hour for your medical care, now we've decided it's 45 minutes. Pretty soon, you're getting the medical treatment that you could have learned from a YouTube tutorial.

And it's from a chick who looks about 16. Yeah, okay. And they're saying, well, stand on this ball. My God, all right, I'm standing on this ball. It's not fixing my fucking foot. Well, that'll be 75 bucks. Yeah. Well, don't you, isn't like some kind of insurance covering this?

And they say, well, what we do, we do this thing where we just charge you right now and then you take it up with your insurance company. Oh, love that. So it's fucking gone then. So the money's just gone then. And it's gone. Do you think the overcharging is a result of, you know how when the government buys like nuts and bolts They're being charged $5 for a nut and $6 for a bolt or whatever. Yeah. Do you think it's the result of that same sort of thing happening with the health

Charis because it was like that surgery. They got a charge X because they know they're only getting 20% back so everything's fucked So if you try to pay with cash, you're fucked That's it. So there none of the none of the prices exist None of the prices exist. None of the prices exist. They're not, when you get 20 million people more insured, there's not suddenly 10,000 more doctors. No, it's fucked. The whole situation is fucked.

Getting more people, healthcare means more misdiagnoses. It's all fucked and the conversation around it is fucking stupid to me. It really pissed me off this week. Anyway, Denzel, what makes you a rage? So I've got a couple things that make me a rage. One is as listeners will recall, at one point, I decided to opt out of being a hermit

and come outside and start doing things outside, such as meeting ladies, go play sports, go drink outside of my apartment, things like that. And it was all a joke. You learned your lesson? Yes, I did. I did.

I'm 27. 27, yeah. That's the last time you could do that. Leave the house. Yeah. I wish I was as wise as he is at 27. Fuck this. So.

I didn't learn that that's all a huge, huge mistake until much, much later. You know, always is, man. I, of course, as part of leaving the house, one of the main draws of being away from myself in my apartment is women, right? Yeah. So you go out and you meet women, you get online,

you do the modern dating thing where you type a nice little message, or you're interviewing. Or you're interviewing for a job nonstop. Exactly. Hey, Ava, nice match on Tinder. Well, my qualifications are, I'm not a rapist. A lot of people, you know, a lot of people can't say that.

Never been accused of rap. Number two, I don't maintain a list. I have a phone. I have a car, I can drive you places. I've got a car, I don't live with my parents. I can drive you places. I've got a car. I don't live with my parents. I do not. It's good.

All good things. I can buy you a drink and I promise nothing will happen. So what do you mean? Except if you ask that one person. So one of the things that I did was I met a nice young lady on OKCupid, one of those free dating sites, right? And we have a nice chat, we're good or whatever, and I invited her to go to an event,

the listener that I mentioned earlier, Andy, pointed out an event, bring MLS San Diego Major League Soccer, it was a cool thing, but I go there with this cracker. Yeah, you want soccer and San Diego? I don't care. We got it in LA, I get it out of here. I'll take whatever. We got it in LA. Get it out of here. I'll I'll take one of the chargers either by the way No, we don't want any buddy in LA. No, take you stupid teams. Get them out of here. Yeah, just like just a trep well We need is the Dodgers. I don't want the Olympics better not come here. That's another

God's a last fucking thing I want That's gonna be a big problem. Yeah. Shit. Yeah, sorry. The traffic's gonna be awesome. No more sports teams. It's plenty here. There's, I go to this event with this girl, right?

We run into a bunch of people from high school. I hadn't seen them in three or four years or something. We stopped bringing it out. And one guy. Always a hazard. Get away from me. Get away from me with this high school shit, with this think of high school, I'm trying to be an adult.

What's fucked up is, when you're with a girl, right, you go out with a girl. Of course there are people that are gonna be around that are gonna be more attractive to you than to her, than you are. But the thing is, when you know them, it's she can talk to them, right?

Because you introduce, hey, this is my buddy Pablo, this is Johnny, this is so-and-so. And of course, one guy, very drunk, decides to start flirting with her right in front of me. And the comedian, it was fucked up. And I look at her and I'm saying, like, well, like, I don't necessarily appreciate this, but you know, let's walk away. Let's walk away. And so no you can't pull her away from that. No I'm not to a flame exactly. What was Mr. Funnyman talking about? He was he literally this was it. Oh my god You're so cute. You're so beautiful. What are you? Oh, it's pretty good game. This is then so he's a great guy He's a great guy. He'll take care of you But what an asshole. Yeah, right? Yeah, this is it where we He's a great guy. He's a great guy. He'll take care of you. But what an asshole.

Yeah, right? Yeah, this is at work. We were friends a few years ago. I haven't. I legit hadn't seen him before. He's like, the guy who becomes like the mayor of Chiktown. Oh God, I really want to hammer it. Like he's not doing anybody any favors.

He's just swooping in on every group. Like every time he's swooping in on every potential romantic encounter and trying to get votes to be the mayor of Chicktown. And I like, hey, what's going on? I'm Mr. Smooth Guy. I don't know if you know about that. I'm not trying to have sex with anybody. I'm just trying to make them want to have sex with me.

Carry on, carry on being a huge failure tonight, then. I'm walking in the opposite. I'm, this is the chicken, the back of the room who's clapping, this is the guy that's clapping at the wrong speed. That you're dealing with, you're like, hey, dickhead, what are you getting out of this? Right.

What is wrong with you that this is what you wanna spend your night doing? Making yourself look good for no reason. And you know, he did get something out of it because later on that evening Right in front of me makes James Numbers Yeah, like what are you doing? Lieber at the fucking place. You know what's fucked up. I would have left right then Jesus Christ I picked her up. I gave her just a lever

You think that bitch doesn't have Uber that's right in front of your face or fucking Fuck the blower whoever and give her a fucking ride yeah Pablo can give her a ride is definitely too drunk to drive home I don't know you need day you know what maybe she deserves that was that shit. You got to change what you're doing. Because you've got, I mean, you've got sassy pants.

How long were you dating that woman? And she still thought you were slipping or roofing. Nine weeks or something. Two months, man. Now you got, now you got a chick taking a number right in front of your face. You got the, that's a cut. That's a cut. Let me, if you're, if you're still writing a script,

that's cut to externalist shot of the bar, guy goes flying through the fucking window, getting a, getting a number from your date right in front of you. Yeah. It was the rest of the night like. I just stopped talking to her at a certain point. Yeah. I'm just like,

I, what do you, I like dropping the ride, I have no idea what it's the first time that's ever happened to be up. And how do I even react to that? Like what? A measured reaction is just like, look, I'm not fucking with that. There's no measured reactions. Everything, like,

are you always this much of a rude bitch? Right? Like a guy or to her? To her. Yeah. Like, I mean, no, no, that guy, I spoke to him a rude bitch. Right. Like a guy or to her. To her. Yeah. Like, I mean, no, that guy, he sure is. I spoke to him a few times. Yeah.

He was drunk to the point where there was no controlling him. You know that, you know that type of drunk. I know. Where did you say heard of it, but I don't know any of that. This guy, I would tell him because he, this is a public event, there are children around or whatever, but they're also serving lots of alcohol for cheat. And this guy's stumbling around.

And he's like, he's still gets this chicks number? Yeah. What is he like, Mr. Hanson? He takes things, what's going on? He's a very, he's like Antonio Banderas, but short and like, I don't know, it's hard to find. And you brought this girl to the event. I didn't know they would be there. How'd I know? No, no, no, no, no, like, I don't know, it's hard to say. And you brought this girl to the event. I didn't know they would be there.

How'd I know? No, no, no, no, no, first of all, don't, you're not, don't not bring a girl to an event because there's gonna be a bunch of mayors of Chick-town campaigning there. Fuck that shit. You, but you did, you picked her up and brought her there. She knew, did she know it was a date?

Or she thinks you're like a friendly guy? I mean, yeah, I guess we should establish the look. If you're on okay, Cupid or on Tinder or any of those things, you want to say exactly. That is a date. It's not like, oh, we're going to have a fucking friendly chat about bell hooks or whatever dumb feminist shit you like. This is me taking you out. Hopefully, maybe sometime down the road, I've been known to wait more than nine weeks. Oh, that's out. I don't know.

How do you talk to these chicks? I, regular conversation, man. It's fucked up because the way that my grandfather and father always told me, it's just like, you know what? You, the way that you have to behave on the first date is treat them as if they were your grandmother, but with a few kinds of like, you're being very polite to them, you do, you don't do anything outlandish, anything that you're doing. No, you gotta do something outlandish.

You gotta be interesting. I think I'm, I think I'm- You gotta just show that you're not, that you're not a serial killer. And that there's something interesting shouldn't be that hard to do. I mean, different. Don't say shit like that either. Like it's not, I just swear on the serial killer.

I mean, that's, I don't even know. I'm about to drink. I didn't like, I didn't do anything to the drink. I didn't do anything to the drink. Just like, just so you know, like it's- I don't make jokes like you drink. I didn't do anything to the drink. I didn't do anything to do. Just so you know, like it's, I don't make jokes like that. That was there. It's just normal conversation, right?

And you just talking with chaps or whatever. Any, any of that, what's talking with chaps? Like chaps like fellows. That's okay. Oh, it's kind of real British in here. Yeah, you just, you just, it's okay. You know, who has a fuck-telt care system?

Britain, I've been to their NHS. The one that they're always talking about, I went through that fucking system. You just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you, you just, couldn't talk. Really, really drunk, I guess. Yeah. I had drank a bunch of viruses. I drank a whole, I drank a cup of strep throat at the bar instead of a Guinness. They mixed up the taps. They served me a pint of strep throat. So I went to the concierge set me up with the NHS. I was like, yeah, here it's free shuttle. Free shuttle.

They'll come pick you up. Free taxi. Free taxi to the NHS. It's like, wow, maybe maybe maybe they got something over here. I show up at the little hospital they sent me to. There's about 60 space aliens waiting in front of me. That's the that's the new term I'm trying to coin for, you know, immigrants, space, and Haley.

Hold 60 space aliens waiting in front of me. Like, okay, I see the problem with this already. I go in the back. Space alien. Hold 60 space aliens waiting in front of me. Like, okay, I see the problem with this already. I go in the back. Space alien nurse gives me some time and all. She goes, well, there you go. Thanks for your three hours. We'll send you, we'll set you up with the taxi back home.

I walk back into the hotel and I get the concierge because say how did it go? I'm like, how did it fucking go? And I'm screaming like a dog that's been debarked, right? It was horrible. I sat in there like in a fucking moon man waiting for my turn for three hours. And I got a tylin' all that I could have bought for $5.

Like this is your free health care. She goes, oh yeah, it's terrible. Everybody goes to a private clinic and just pays. No shit, bitch. Yeah, right out of her mouth. Without even a hesitation. I was like, how do you have no idea what they're saying about the health carrier in the United States of America? Yeah, because I thought I was about to see a mine

I thought I was about to get a mind-blowing experience not a ride not a three-hour ride on a real life It's a small world after all where they hand me a free pack of Thailand all at the end and say good luck with your strep throat Yeah That's fucking horseshit anyway. I'm sorry, Benzo. You got to punch up your game, man. They diagnosed you with strep throat. They did in America when I came back.

Yeah. Yeah, where everybody comes to get their diseases treated. Damn. That's such bullshit. It's such fucking bullshit. It's a scam. It is like, it's like real life vampirism. All the, it's all old people and baby boomers,

sucking money out of the young. Like you wanna fix healthcare? Stop paying everybody under 30, stop paying insurance. Good luck with your knees, you dumb motherfuckers. Make an info, make an info, commercial for that. You want healthcare? Sell your fucking house, retire, so we can get jobs! How's that for negotiating?

Oh my God. I just remember my old roommate left a chicken Vegas. Oh. We weren't leaving somebody somewhere. Why? Same reason. She took a dude's number. Basically, yeah, somebody that they both kind of knew,

getting too little too close to him. They've been on a few dates or whatever. Goes to a weekend in Vegas and yeah, she's looking to, I don't know, move up the ladder to, it was, you know, this incestuous entertainer. You know, he calls me at like five in the morning. He's like, Hey, I was like, what's up? He's like, she was playing me, bro. I was like, God, dude, you sound like you're in the car. How long were they dating before that? They'd been out a few times, maybe. Whatever. Yeah, he's left in Vegas.

The house phone starts ringing off the hook. It's her, you know? Yeah. I don't know where he went. I don't know what I did. I don't know what I possibly could have done. He left her four hours away in Vegas. It's fucking hilarious.

I mean, it's nothing against them. Like they gotta do this shit. Yeah, they don't know what you're up to. You don't have to be a party to it. Yeah, but you gotta, so this similar kind of thing happened. I mean, I was on a date with this chick at the Prince of Wales and she comes back from the bathroom and there's like two dudes kind of jockeying along with her,

like just walking along with her. She's getting straight for me, but they're there just tagging along. And they come over to me and like start kind of, start roping everyone into a conversation. And the guy's like, hey, oh, hey, I got a confused look on my face. And she goes like, oh, these are just my new friends. And the guy's like, oh, hey, I'm a confused look on my face and she goes like, oh, these are just my new friends.

And the guy's like, oh, hey, I'm a Timmy Kiss ass. And I was like, hey, you two, get the fuck out of here. Oh, yeah. Yeah, and they're like, oh, they looked all awkward and then they left and they got them. What the fuck, and I turned to her. And I think what the fuck do you think this is? But she was an idiot.

She didn't. She didn't know, but then you gotta do something. Don't just sit there. I mean, I talked to him a couple times or whatever, but it's only so much you can do, right? Some, the only thing that you can stop somebody from, you can't stop somebody from doing what they wanna do. I can talk to him as much as I want,

I can say, yo, Pablo, fuck outta here, stop doing this in front of me. Don't do this. Did that. In front of her. No, not in front of her. No, you have to do it in front of her because that is how you win their attention.

This is all bullshit that they wanna see. They want to see that. No, we're not. They wanted to see some kind of. She wasn't that hot. She wasn't hot enough for that. Just do it for practice. Okay. Do it for practice so you don't get enough for that. Just do it for practice. Okay.

Do it for practice so you don't get into a situation where you're dating for nine weeks and check still things, you're slipping a roofies. She wants to see you flip out and say like, hey, what the fuck are you talking about? Slipping you roofies. Not slipping you in your roofies. Don't ever, don't, don't, what are you,

that's very rude. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Okay, I'll keep that in mind. I mean. They want to see an outburst because you are a very, you are, you are an understated guy. Yeah. You're a very friendly guy.

They want to see a little, I can't. They want to see those nipples come out. Pop those nipples. You got to pop your collar, then you pop the nipples. You know, it's funny because I even, even when I'm pressed, I don't rough, my brothers don't get ruffled like that. Like I almost got into a fight out of CVS recently. Okay.

Because you're fighting over, you're fighting over like dollar power cables for your iPhone 5, you're not fighting over a woman. You're fighting over popcorn, Opalis bags, but not fighting over a woman. Fighting over at CVS. A place in line. Somebody opened up a new lane.

I went to get into a new lane and this fuck boy came up and was just like, Hey, you're cutting. And you're very loudly. And it's just like, come on, dog. Like, told him to suck my dick. Yeah. And of course, we go back and forth, but honestly, I don't fight people. You totally got to suck your dick.

Yeah, I told him suck my dick. In my CVS. Yes, very loudly. You just shouted at a man to suck your penis. Yes, I said suck my dick. And he was just like, oh, whoa. He's like, whoa. You can't say dog, did you say dog too?

Uh, maybe. I could have thought it was Randy Jackson. It's suck my dick dog. Yeah. No, I mean GMC's all over that Oh Randy Jackson tells Tells person in line to see me yes, it's 10 zill walking out with 10 bags of Northapolis

I was there to buy stuff to do laundry with thank you very much, but I The whole thing is he's after a certain point, he started talking shit to me, then some fucking other guy thought he was a hero and started chiming in. I told this guy to the other guy to mind his own fucking business. It's because of those glasses. My brother-in-law has glasses that are similar to yours and he's a big guy. He could be, he could kick my ass. No, no problem. He played football for his entire high school and college. Like he looks like a barrel, you know, you know him. Wait, who is this?

My brother-in-law. Yeah, yeah. He couldn't kick your ass. Yeah, he's, you know. He's just a big guy. And once he gets started, he's like the juggernaut bitch. Like I've seen him drag somebody, like put somebody in a chokehold and just not let go. And I'm like,'m like that guy's dead. Yeah, yeah, I mean, I don't know. I don't want to

get involved because I've got a beverage here, but that guy's probably dead. He's it. He's like my brother and I is like a crocodile, but a human. He's like a killer crock when he gets you in his jaws of death, which are his arms, his large red, red, flinstone arms. You're dead. You're a dead man. But it's because of his glasses, because he has the same kind of glasses that you do like Clark Kent glasses. People fuck with him non-stop. Like when he doesn't have the glasses on,

people don't fuck with him. But when he has the glasses on, people just see the glasses and like, oh, I can fight these glasses. That's why you get picked on. Oh, that's interesting. Yeah. Either way, this guy, he says after a certain point

of going back and forth with this dude, he says, oh, push me out of line, huh? If you have a problem with me being here, push me out of line. And I say, this is not a big enough deal for that. And as it turns out, he gets checked out, I get checked out. He's waiting for me in the fucking parking lot. Oh yeah? To just keep talking shit.

Yeah. He was just like, come over here so I can slap the shit out of you. And I was like, dog. My boy. Dog. No, dog. Dog, chill. You're out.

I gotta say no, dog. No ticket to Hollywood for you. Yeah. Okay, what do you look like? Oh, he was a short white guy, kind of buff. Yeah. Kind of buff. Yeah, he was like Napoleon complex. Like, I work out because my dick is small and I'm small. He was a short white guy kind of buff. Yeah. Kind of buff. Kind of buff.

Yeah, he was like Napoleon complex. Like, I work out because my dick is small and I'm small. That kind of guy. That's a myth. That's a hateful myth that men who work out have small dicks. Well, this guy was a small satchel. Well, I was going to say Napoleon. Napoleon was not short.

Now, he was like 5'8". He was 5'6", he was perfectly average for that height. It was a, it was a, an incorrect paperwork when he was first in the military. Oh really? And the list of it, five two. Yeah, Napoleon was totally average height. So it actually comes from something. They listed him in five two.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's totally bullshit. Like that whole thing and everybody says, oh, Napoleon complex and he wasn't short. I heard that he had his hand like that in his jacket because he was always low-key masturbating and stick was that long, so I was terribly, I was totally new. There's a record show, anything like that? All right, it's been the season of pranks.

Let's see, I got pranking news from you guys. I pulled the most hilarious prank ever this week. I don't know if you saw it, Sean. Yeah, the Kendall and Hyde people, you heard about Kendall and Hyde they were they were sponsor of Maddox's show for like all the Indiana Jones man person. Yeah, the Indian sorry the Indian Jones man person network. Um, they're they're domain went down. And I saw it being reported on let me say I think affirmative nod on Reddit said, hey, the Kendall and Hyde domain is down. I go on to Kendall and Hyde.com and it's like the Shopify default screen,

which is just, hey, welcome to Shopify, you haven't set up your domain yet. So you've got to log in and claim this domain. So I said, oh, okay. So their company, the company ended, the Kendall and Hyde company ended as a company ended. I guess it stiffed a bunch of people with their orders or whatever. But I log in to Shopify and just go to the, because my the Dick store shop.dedictshow.com is on Shopify. So I pop in there. And on the domain section, just click add, Kendall and Hyde, right? As one of my domains, boom, instantly, instantly all of the Kendall and Hyde

are pointing to my store. And then, six, God, what a six, eight, eight, a tax sub. And IRC goes, hey, you should get the Kendall and Hyde, Kendall Hyde.com slash madcast. Cause that was what Maddox was building. If you go there, you get like two bucks off of your $400 man purse. Like that URL was all over the madcast media network sites. I said, hey, that's a good idea.

So I go back into Shopify because people are wondering how I did this. It's not active anymore. At least it's not active without the WWW. So I went back into Shopify and did like a, just made a page, little joke saying, I'll reach the joke. So I thought it was pretty funny. I don't want to tube my own horn,

but I thought it was pretty humorous. And it's the season of Prinks. All right, this is the URL that I sent it to. So keep in mind, this is from all of the pages on Madcast media, because Kendall and Hyde were a sponsor for Maddox's for so long that he's like, she'll the fuck out of them on every episode. They're in all the audio for his first like 15.

So you were there. Yeah, yeah. Sean, you were there. You know how, you know how often Kendall and Hyde were mentioned. They're on every, they're on every episode description. Now all of those episode descriptions pointed to my, to my store with a special page just for the slash madcast URL that said the title hashtag dick lies. Was it a good idea to blow marketing resources trying to sell $400 Indiana Jones leather

man purses to the audience of a 40 year old failed writer selling himself as a manly man who cries in front of other men and also thinks being a cuck makes you the next miles Davis, probably not. Use promo code. Where do miles Davis come from? As a Billy Madison quote, if P and your pants is cool, consider me miles Davis. Yeah, she says all of her. She's Peter Pants, you know, used the promo code, can't pay rent in Mad Bucks to get 5% off any order at the Dick store and Monday or just listen to the best podcast in the universe. The Dick show now with 50% less soup. We keep you reading an obsessive polyamory. So, yeah, that was funny. Everybody had a good laugh and of course Maddox is immediately editing all of his pages to remove any any reference

It took a good couple hours before Kendall either Kendall and Hyde. I don't know who or maybe that fucking potato head Cameron Hermann's Very hot she photographed hot. Oh, yeah, I don't know what she I don't know what she really looks like Cameron Hermann's Mr. Potato Head his looks, she's girlfriend's very fucking hot online. He's a fucking asshole though. That guy, that guy responds to this like funny joke shit by going and posting people's real names on like a real fucking scumbag.

And it's even more mysterious, because he's like, he's, everyone knows where he works. It's like, why are you, why are you upping, why are you changing the nature of this ball busting to something extremely personal, where everyone knows where you fucking work, man.

Like, what are you thinking? What the fuck's wrong with you? It's just, it's restraint. It's restraint that allows us to live in a world with people like that. Yeah. You know, where they do, they do this thing, they chisel away it, you're like, all right,

like you're crossing the line, but we have restraint. We just thought it was funny. You're an embarrassment. I hope that, like I hope it doesn't work out well for you in your life. I hope that someday you fuck with somebody who doesn't have restraint. Well, but that is what happens, I think. And in many, many cases, if you act like an asshole, often enough to enough people,

somebody's gonna fucking learn you something. And that's what's, that is kind of what's great. It's like your parents raise you or society raises you. Or the world raises you. Your parents hopefully have the maximum level of restraint because you are a complete asshole to them. You're starting when you're a baby and you won't even let them sleep and continue it. You know, right, right, right, as soon as you learn how to talk, it's fuck you in this

year and asshole and this year ruining my life, you know, this, this and that. And then you get your teenage age, you're snarky, but you're not, you're still better than you were. That's your most, the most restrained ever is those parents who don't just the first time you wake them up out of a sleep. They don't just walk in your room and go, you're gonna put the fuck in her and just shut the fuck in my mic, let me, because that's what you do to like a house guest.

A stereo spilled some cranberry juice on my stairs. I'm like, God, you fucking a stereo is spilling cranberry juice on my face. Then you get in the real world and God, I hope you just run into somebody with no restraint at all. Because it's bullshit. Anyway, this whole thing, so we get the billboard going up, right?

They track down, when is this happening? So as soon as I figure out a funny enough joke, that's, like there's been, I'll read you some of the, it's all for the jokes. I'll read you some of the entries so far. Dylan had somebody, did a mockup of the actual Titanic sinking when it breaks in half and starts sinking and wrote madcast media on the side of it.

It's funny, but I think that I think it would be too much advertising for madcast media, right? Somebody said, let's see, Dylan Powell said to put madcucks up on the billboard. Sam Pasino said, you got to do the scene from Titanic. There's a lot of Titanic related ones. Where it's Jack and Rose on the bow of the ship, but it's Maddox on Rose's face. And I'm as Jack with my hands, cup the rope, whatever that I'm the king of the world. It wasn't the king of the world in the next one.

Christian Pulix is the dickest problem in the universe, Scott Fisher had one. Scott Fisher had the biggest problem, the universe brought to you by biggest.thedickshow.com. I'm thinking after this, I'm because I want this to be like a testament to failure, right in your face, right? And I'm thinking the only thing that says, Maddox, this was your biggest failure. I want this to be an encapsulation of everything

that is you and everything that is the reason why you're a failure. Hashtag And everything that is the reason why you're a failure, hashtag, dick lies. Because to me, that hashtag was the, was the ultimate was the, the zenith of the pendulum swinging all the way to the other side of the apex of the his, his, his like ultimate SJW pendulum swinging all the way to the very end where he got on video and said this guy is a thief and a rape apologist. And I'm going to make a hashtag out of it. Yeah. What is, what does that mean? Rap apologist? It doesn't, nobody knows. It just doesn't sound like it means anything. It's somebody to me. It means it, it sounds like it means somebody who puts the blame on her for like, well, you know, she didn't say no.

That's a person blaming. Yeah, that's it's victim blaming. Oh, so a rape appellate. Hmm. Interesting. Yeah, I don't know. Well, I'm in over my head. I think we're all in overhead.

It's just come to mean somebody who doesn't scream as long as possible. That would be victim's fault for everything. So that's what I think. Rory just goes, sorry I raped you. Yeah, that's what I meant to say. It's the hashtag dick lies because that was with no, like that was with that was who Maddox is as a person. That video was not in character.

It was it was a rare insight into who he really is. And that was what he thought would be the execution of a brilliant plan. And it backfired so spectacularly that I wanted to just be a giant. I'm thinking just jack black gigantic white letters, hashtag, DIC Lies. That's it. That's just a constant fucking reminder of this is who you are. Don't ever forget that this is what, this was a good idea to you.

This is what you thought about doing for months. This is the execution of who you are as a person and everything that you've learned in your life. And this was the, as much as you wanted to spite and destroy me, like in this stupid, in this stupid circle of friends, I could not give less of a fuck about in this, this small time comedy world of UCB, this is what you thought would be the dagger. Like this is what, this is your Everest. This is what, this is the best thing you could do.

And it was laughed at and mocked and stupid. And this is because you have mental problems, you're never gonna be able, you're never gonna admit that it was dumb. You just keep doubling down, doubling down, and this is the reminder. I thought that would be the funniest way to go about it. I think that entire rant transcribed and just put on a billboard

to be better. All right, let me get some collars on the line. Another high energy moment this week. Let me see if he's here. I'm gonna play a song while we wait for, while we wait for, What we wait for... What you got? For Phil.

This one's by... This one's by Chris Strand. It's called Dick Butte. He says. Oh. Mm-hmm. This is the greatest and best podcast in the world. The Diction.

A long time ago, me and my brother Sean here, we were podcasting on a long successful show. Then all of a sudden, there's Shine, a hairy deep in the middle of the show. And he said, Hey, man, being this all sure, you're make your air. We'll meet in chat. We looked at each other. And we said, okay. So we taped the first thing I came to our heads. Just so happened to be

The best show in the world It was the best show in the world The show was attacked by GPPs And a group of bitches from UCB out of jealousy The attacks all failed but they didn't know When you treat your pants they will help you grow And it'll give you trouble Dictator, I love his tone

Yeah, he's great man And the show was great The main focus was comedy And not debate He asked us During my network We said the name We have our own CUNTS

HOOOOO Whoa Whoa Whoa Whoa This is not The best ballcasting world Your

Listen to the dick show Oh man Can't continue the biggest problem in our universe No This is the dick show It's got the greatest sound in the world That's true The fuck is on the back? The fuck is in the world That's true Oh the bright So but I'm the best in the world

Oh the right Oh the right Too bad it's us the biggest brother From the far best char in the world Oh the world Oh the world Oh the world Oh the world

Oh the world Oh the world Oh the world Oh the world Oh the world Oh the world That's fucking great. The peculiar thing is this my friend, the podcast we recorded that fateful night.

It makes a fuck-tug more scryla than that all-show! Let's do the dick show! But here are the ranges ranges The dick tips are there From dick and from life coach Subscribe to a colon And make your own podcast and plug it Don't forget to create a Patreon Curve Make Swinging Dicks and Bulk and Deep Poghars

That's amp That's a good song That's great Ball ride Yeah, that's a good song. It's great. Yeah. It's a good song. It's great. Yeah. It's a good song. It's great. Yeah. It's a good song.

It's great. Yeah. It's a good song. It's great. Yeah. It's a good song. It's great. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And... D-D-D-Do-Do? Yeah, where's the... Ah, there we go, you bastard.

Should clap along with that. Yeah, right. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha in poly rhythms. You ever think about that? Poly rhythms? What the hell's that? Polly rhythms have sex with each other. Oh, let's see, I got another one from Hayes and Cruz. You remember that guy? Yeah. Yeah, okay. He's really good at voices. He sent in, he sent in some additional There you go. That's French for delay. We're all cucks out there People who don't put the toilet seat down unhygienic and gross like my last rage There's a certain group of people out there. I think it's actually okay to leave a germ-written piss covered as smelling Come see up But don't be touchy-gun people. People who piss on trees when it's with fucking environment, you asshole, speaking of

assholes, and I mentioned a stereos yet, it's my best joke. Like, what has a tree never done to you? Wait, hold up, Dick. Oh, I saw him big as you said, fuck trees. Yeah. Yeah, fuck trees. Oh, just a fella raised for you. People who burph in public are on the phone.

Just mute yourself, you psycho. People who go to sleep after sex. So what's more boring than a bedroom starfish? I'll tell you, Dick. I mean, people who go to snoozeville right out of the phone and half. So, you know, you're there with your dick in your hand. We can all relate. You know, you've got some fraud who has gone to sleep right after sex.

And you really want to ask the important questions. Like, was it good? Did you like it? Yeah. Do you think I'm pregnant? I mean, how Maddox is such a cuck? It's one of the things us guys have to deal with all the time ladies.

Uh, it sounds like Maddox. Like people are calling her the female Maddox. I don't know why they would say that, you know. But it does sound like it does sound like a chick, Maddox, but there's stuff flying in there. She's taking it in good humor. Yeah. People who every time you need to do something for you,

they just break out a set of joggers, a wig and a cane. Yeah. Sorry, I'm making a cardio milkshake with a couple tablespoons of this all natural protein powder. Actually, honey, cardio does it actually help as much as weight lifting actually. I'm leaving a voicemail for dick. Come on, babe. Create some character on a game you'll never finish.

What the hell, Pat? He's not my new boyfriend. Oh, no. You're not finna weed's on that one. Alright, let me see if somebody, let me see if this dude is here. Are you there? I'm here. Can you hear me?

What do you want to go by on the show? Ben Garrison or Ben? We'll just go with Ben. Why not? Ben? All right, big, bad Ben, you're on the show. So this, the other one sounded like an alias. There are, there's got 20 alias now, Sean.

You just, you start a new life wherever you go. We're back to the Bajon Draper world. Okay. You go to a new town, a new website, you start a, you start a whole new life with a new alias. That's the world. You get a, you get a social security number, a brand new one. You can say whatever you want, brand new Twitter account, all new friends. You can be whomever you want.

So you're, you are, you've been intimately connected with the rape list, the eight-chan list. Oh, yeah. Big, so Big Bad Ben's got, got the original scoop from the get go. Is that right? That is 100% correct. I was there and I know personally who did it now. Will I give out their name? No, they're a very close friend of mine. And I've already talked with you personally about this. But the rapist was never intended as something that was ever meant to blow up into what it did. It was a continuation of the Get Rape Facebook banning jokes at the time when everyone

was getting strikes and bands and all sorts of crazy stuff for saying different variations of get-raped on Facebook. So this is one of the kind of saddest and funniest stories I've heard out of this whole thing. Because this guy, Big Bad Ben hits me up on Reddit saying, hey, I don't know how to say this, but like me and my friend made his, his friend made the 8chan get raped list. And it wasn't the guy who called in months ago. And he made, he made the, the, oh yeah, Ben, did your friend call in and apologize for it? Nope. Okay. So that guy was, that guy was full of shit. But, so the, the sad part and the, the funny part, you know, because they're the same thing. Is that, yeah, just depends

which side you're on. Yeah. If it's, if it's not you, it's hilarious. If it hasn't happened yet, it's a tragedy. Once it's happened, it's hilarious. Right. So big bad Ben and his friend are fans from way back, like way, way, way back. And they made this, they went on A-Chan and made this quote, get raped thread because that was like, that was that was Maddox's phrase from the old show, you know, which is it was just somebody who could get fucked. Like somebody like it wasn't, yeah, didn't it come from one of the comments on the like show? Yeah, Mr. Burgers dropped it as the first comment. So it was funny because it's like,

oh, that's the very first comment was the most atrocious thing that somebody could think of and say. And so succinctly, like, it was why it made it so pithy. And that's what made it as saying. So these guys, these, these two gentlemen, this pair got banned from Facebook or something like that. And they went on eight Chan and just continued the tradition of telling, making a list, saying people could get fucked. And they called it that. And you guys, so you posted like, uh, who did you, who was, who did you post in the original thread? Well, it was Lenora Claire was the very first one because she was this, if I'm not mistaken,

this was right after she was the guest. Yeah. And she got hate beyond belief, which I mean, I can kind of get like, oh, vocal fry, not the most aesthetic to listen to. Yeah. But she was far from the hate that she got, which was kind of what made it funny was it was so ridiculously disproportionate to what the actual performance ever was. Yeah. Yeah.

So then Ben's friend, who actually made the post, once it blew up, he tried to delete it, except the way no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,. So it had no, like there's no other way to claim ownership of a post you made, so he couldn't do it. So he stuck in a new place and he's like, well, I guess I just ruined this guy's life. Like, they were, I mean, they, imagine,

this is like, these are guys who were like a fan from way back. Yeah. Like, wave and they just, they, one little post. Inverted, they inadvertently totally fucked up at the time my whole life, right? Over an eight-chan to the tune of 21 grand a month.

Well, that's right. So obviously I want to thank both of you guys who sent you both. I sent you both a bunch of free shit when you told me about this the first time. Like it turned out okay. Oh, honestly, what ended up, because we were originally, once this all happened, we thought, okay, we'll just, we'll delete all this stuff, we'll, we'll move forward, we'll just do something to get it done, then we couldn't do that, and then we're like, all right, this will never be, you know, spoken about again, shit. This is all. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Like, disappointing dick is like disappointing your father. Oh, it's so sad. I mean, can you imagine? It's so sad. Yeah. So once it happened, like once you saw Maddox's video, what did you guys say? What did you think? Well, the thing is that video didn't drop

until a while after the rape list had been up. Sure. And I've told you, or I post it somewhere on something. Is it funny? Oh, God. I think Maddox, or somebody that knows Maddox, is definitely behind the eight Chan, sorry, Thread. But why do you say that? Or not the thread, the board. Yeah, I'm going to

use that. I say that. And I've seen this when it happened is there was this whole major There was this whole major backlash the moment that came out and I I don't watch TV. I do internet drama. It's funnier. It's more entertaining. Yeah, I like shit posting Everyone has their thing and that's my thing. It's what I like. Yeah So I was following all the stuff all all the drama, all the gossip that was going on on the H&Bord, both of them, because there's apparently two. One existed before the one that ended up

ruining your personal and professional relationship. Right. There was a docks of Jesse. A mental Jess. Yeah, there was somebody posted a bunch of info of mental Jess you're saying on the 8-chan board. And it was up for a Jess couple hours. And then out of nowhere, it got deleted.

Now the only way that can get deleted is if the person who creates the post still has the little code to delete it. If the mod of the board deletes it, or if the admin hot wheels Frederick Brennan, the guy that owns a Chan, decides to delete it. Well, I would, I would, I see what you're saying, but I would like to think that maybe, maybe whoever posted it said like, oh, wow, this, like, maybe this could be taken the wrong way and I'll just take it down.

May that, that, that could happen. But I want to hear about what happened when you saw that video and your guys' thread was the smoking gun of how I'm the worst person in the world. What did you guys do? Like, did you talk about it? What was the first thing that went through your mind? Well, the first thing we tried to do was we talked back and forth to each other like, shit, we need to figure out what we're going to do to make this right. Like, what can we do to make sure that this doesn't fuck up everything? Yeah. To say the

least, it kind of, well, I don't want to want to well we weren't successful in any of our ideas Okay, what were your ideas? We tried sending an email out Each end is if that would do anything Spoiler warning it didn't We tried like posting Not so offensive things or at least humorous things on the right-

So, thread to knock it off, like to take the punch out of it? Yeah, but I mean by then, we were all right. Ah, they tried to dilute it. Okay, and then that clearly didn't work and then on top of that, we, And that clearly didn't work. And then on top of that, we, like we even at one point thought,

okay, well, we're seeing this writing campaign to UCB, like, okay, great, yeah, we'll write UCB. If fucking Maddox is gonna say this shit, we're at UCB and tell them, fucking don't do this, we don't wanna come forward because it's clear what's gonna happen these people are psychopaths, we'll end up on the chopping block. Now, it's like sending an email you didn't want

and then running and trying to unplug the computer before I go, yeah. Yeah, nobody reads your emails, nobody look, we gotta delete, we gotta go through everybody's emails and delete what this email was. I said it while I was drunk, I didn I was drunk. I didn't mean it. I didn't mean it. Uh, and, well, I'm sorry.

All this happened to you. Yeah. I was all too accepted. No, but oh my God, honestly, thank you for taking it as well as you did. And honestly, it was cowardly a shit for us. I mean, the friends still won't come forward. I, and I understand. No,, it was cowardly as shit for us. I mean, the friends that won't come forward. I know. No, no, no, no, no, no, it's not. It's not because you didn't do anything wrong. Yeah. You did nothing. Yeah. You did nothing. But like,

it's like you went down the street and stapled it into a fucking telephone pole. You did nothing. Don't let Maddox rewrite in your brain and trick you into thinking that you guys did anything wrong because you didn't. He's just a vindictive maniac and he's, he's, he's got chumps syndrome. He's, he's got warring factions of, Trump, Trump syndrome and Asperger's fighting a civil war in his brain and he can't keep a hold of it. That's what's going on. Do not let him write your reality. Yeah. You added another permutation to like a tasteless it. That's what's going on. Do not let him write your reality. Yeah, you added another permutation to like a tasteless joke.

That's an inside joke that's common thread in all the shows. It's nothing and thanks for listening. I hope your friend isn't too bad about it. That would... Is he sitting there? It's like, oh no, that's the post that I wrote. Otherwise, there's nothing to this video. Like, you watch Maddox's videos like otherwise

It's like made up shit about w9's like that's a rape. Oh, no That was the only thing that had anybody to it was that and it's mine. It's his fault. It's this guy's fault big bad pants Yeah, all right. What it makes you a rage man? I was gonna bring in something funny, but I feel that this is more appropriate, given everything. People that try and pass off doxing as just a prank bro or just trolling. Oh, okay.

Like who? So, it's one thing if you're gonna talk shit on the internet. And if you're gonna talk shit on the internet, go as far as you want. Yeah, that's fine. But at some point, and I'm not even 100% against doxing, I can understand it in certain scenarios where it's like, once you, I'm sorry. What kind of scenarios? A good example would be Judge William Adams, the judge that beat the crap out of his daughter viciously and was caught on camera. Like I can understand people getting outraged and saying, okay, let's all gang up and go after that guy.

He is the scum of the year. Oh, okay. Or I don't know maybe ISIS videos or something like that. Yeah, we should all get together and go after ISIS. Let's pull our resources. Let's all get really outraged and pull our resources into whatever we can do to go after ISIS, whatever it takes. I have a couple of pistols.

No, we're gonna get bigger pistols than that. We're gonna get so many guys going after them that you can't even imagine it. It's gonna cost trillions of dollars by the time. That's all doxxing now. That's what that's the that's that's all doxing now. The war on terror all the way down to saying like your mom's name online. It's all it's all become doxing like that's what they're going to call war in the 22nd century. But Baron Trump, what the the 52nd president of the United States is going

to get it. I'm like, all right, we're going we're having a big doxathon against North Korea. We're finally launching our doxathon against North Korea. We're finally launching our dox troops, our shock-tubbery put up a long on one and three with me. We're gonna go through, we got, we got, we got everybody's mom's name in North Korea and we're gonna go online one at a time and say their mom's name and that's gonna really nail them.

That we got, we got, we got the whole army sitting on their laptops ready to, ready to tweet out everybody's name and that's gonna really nail them. That we got, we got, we got the whole army's sitting on their laptops ready to, ready to tweet out everybody's name and say like, oh, hey, hey, Mr. Squiggle riding your mom, Kim, Kim, whatever, what's a, what's a North Korean name? I don't know, Sandra, your mom saying this, what is Sandra thinking about what you're doing online, Kim drawing it, that's gonna be the future

of warfare is just doxing. And here's the thing though, isn't it? I mean, disagree with me or agree with me on this one, but isn't it kind of the equivalent of starting shit and then going and crying to the teacher? Yeah, it is. You got your ass kicked? Yes, it definitely is.

That's what it feels like. And I'm all for just going bat shit crazy, troll, and say whatever you want, it's the internet. Don't take it too seriously. Otherwise, you're just going to make the internet lame. And in certain scenarios, I can understand doxing, but you have to understand, once you cross that line, it's one or the other. You're either in total warfare or you're either in, I'm just fucking around. There's no kind of, I'm fucking around, but also I'm gonna do this horrible attitude.

Once you're in, you're in. Speaking of that, I gotta talk about Leah. All right, Ben, thank you for calling in. Keep posting. Don't stop posting. Don't let this stop you. Don't let this little roadblock stop you too in your illustrious career of posting on H&N. A shit posting.

Yeah, thanks for calling in. Thanks for having me. Take care. I should really be thanking that guy, right? Yeah. Okay, I got another, this guy, Phil. Phil, are you there? Yeah, can you hear me?

Yes, we got you. Phil got a fucking tattoo. The first tattoo of the Dict Show. Have you seen it, Sean? No. Oh my fucking god, you gotta see this thing, dude. It looks tight as fuck. It is, where did you get this thing?

It looks like, I've never seen this limb that you have in the picture, Phil. I've never seen a limb this size, so I can't tell where you got this tattoo. Where did you get it? It's on the back of my calf. That's a calf? Yes. I've never seen a calf that size. Sean,

look at this. Look at this. Look at this tattoo. Look at this dick show tattoo on the back of this guy's calf. Look at the size of that guy's calf. It's like a, it's, it's freakish. It looks like, it looks like a neck. It looks like someone's back. The size of this calf. I've never seen a calf that look at this beautiful fucking tattoo. So it's like, yeah, you've never missed a leg they felt. Wesh Morris did this for you. Am I right? Yes. In in in Pennsylvania. Yeah, out in Lancaster at an incredible tattoo factory. How did he con you into getting a dick show tattoo? What's going on in your mind?

I mean, honestly, I talked to him first about it. I think there was a thread in the Facebook group going around. And I realized he was only about two hours from me. I was like, fuck it, I'll come have you do it. Is it your first tattoo? You got a, no, I think this is my ninth. Your ninth tattoo. Wow. But it's a clean calf, clean, spotless calf, Sean,

that people can see while you're running away from them. After you've just popped and let us Jonesed them a little bit, maybe give them a little, I don't know what you're doing to people, but this is what they're gonna see as you sprint away. Yeah. When you're wearing your short shorts. It's like the happy face on the ladies' man's ass after he fucks your wife. Yeah. That's a great way.

This is what they're gonna see as you're jumping out of the window. After you're cucking some dude at home. What makes you a rage, man? What makes me a rage? People at intersections who have the right of way and try to be nice and give you the right of way and it just ends in this weird stalemate where you end up there for like a minute when it should have been just over immediately.

Where they don't understand that the person on the right goes first and they're trying to turn, they're trying to turn a very simple interaction into something much more complicated than it needs to be. They're trying to make this, they're trying to turn your intersection stop into their church for the day.

But this is their nice act for the day. Yeah. There's two problems there. There's one, they don't know the actual rules. Yeah. And then also, yeah, oh, just be nice. It's like, no, look, you are there. This can all go very smoothly.

It doesn't work because everyone's nice. It works because everyone knows the rules and follow them. Just go. Just go. Where you get to the point where you have to put your car in park and just sit there and throw your hands up, where you have to get, because there's always that game of chicken where you're like,

all right, how long am I going to wait for you to creep your stupid car out? It's like a mind reading game, like two gunslingers where you're parked on the line, sitting your ass on the line waiting until you finally just say, fuck it. You win. You've, you've nice to me into a complete shut down. I know. I'm just going to sit here in a slump with my foot firmly on the brakes, staring at you like you are two kids in a human suit, because you're so fucking stupid. I've been with you when you actually put your car in park.

Yeah. And just sat there. I'm angry. No, you're just like, you're gonna have to go because we're gonna keep playing chicken with each other or it's like, yep, I'm not a motorist anymore. Nope, just here. I'm just parking here.

I'm thinking about what you're gonna do and then do it. And think about it. I want you to think about the weird instance you had today of the guy at the intersection who put his car into park and was staring at you like you're an idiot. Maybe it will sink in. Maybe right before you go to sleep and that twilight kiss of sleep that will occur to you, my face, looking at you like you're a space alien and you will think maybe I did fuck that up. That's funny.

Yeah, maybe I fucked it up. Maybe next time, I'll just, maybe I need to read something about who the hell, maybe I need to ask somebody how intersections work. Maybe I'm gonna call somebody up tomorrow and go, hey, is there some kind of rule for who goes intersection? No, they don't know either. Look it up.

They're gonna call the smartest person they know and say like, well, do you know, if you're at an intersection Everyone's just nice all the time, right? It's like a big negotiation every time everybody gets to an intersection Right there can say no person on the right goes person on the right goes. It's got nothing to do with being nice. All right Phil The tattoo looks great. Are you gonna be at road rage? Yeah, I'll absolutely be all right come show it off man It looks fucking tight does look good. Yeah, that looks fucking good. Good looking west. Who man? West Morris. Now. What's we doing? Yeah, I mean All right, come show it off, man. It looks fucking tight. It does look good. Yeah, it looks fucking good, man.

Good looking at this. Well, it's more as now as we're doing. Yeah. All right, man, have a good one. Let's do. Paige offered to wing for me next time she's here. Nice. I'm down.

Yeah, Tess, I will take her up on it. Paige, excuse me, Peach, please bring down a cute friend with you. See, this is the thing. This is the thing that always bothers me about when people are like, oh yeah, I'll wing for you. Well, I mean, if you... And that plan goes right out the window if they have any options?

No, no, no. It's more of like a moral conundrum for me. Because it's like, yeah, so you're willing to wing, for like wing, but would you set me up with one of your friends? No. Like, exactly. Exactly.

Yeah, because yeah, then I don't know if I want to vouch for you that much. Yeah, exactly. So yeah, you'll talk me up to strangers, but like. Well, but wait a minute, are you, you're talking about setting somebody up with one of your friends? Maybe they just don't think you're going to get along with their friends.

That's fair. Because they're like, you're jumping several people in the queue. You're jumping several levels on the pyramid. I mean, the idea being that if there was somebody that you thought I would be compatible with in your friend group, would you set me up with them? Not like, oh, do you have any single friends now, any available friends? Now, let's get it going. No, it's like, well, hypothetically speaking, would you set me up with somebody that you

know? If you were a good fit, I don't shun, how long have we known each other? We never set each other up with any friends. I never ask any of my dude friends for that, ever. It's not, I don't trust them like that. Right. Like, maybe, I trust. No, I don't trust them like that. Right. Like maybe I trust you too, I don't know. Because the opposite is when your friend has a girlfriend

and she tries to set you up with everybody, she'll try to set you up with a log. I just like, well, I got this dog that I know. I think it's a female. You should, you guys should go, you should go have coffee. Like what the fuck do my family does that as well? Yeah, they just like, they just want to get, yeah. Do you, do you listen to yourself?

Do you ever reflect on your own thoughts? Do you know me at all? Oh, you know what? Speaking of family, yeah, your burn court idea that you've had? That's a good idea. Yeah, it's a great idea. I went to a family outing a while ago, and it was one guy, the uncle and the nephew. Nephew's name is Troy.

Uncle's name is Arty. Troy was talking shit the entire night, and Arty had enough. And so as Troy was leaving, he had just enlisted in the Navy. And he was just like, well, I'm about to depart. Like, I had just enlisted in the Navy. And he was just like, well, I'm about to depart. Like, I hope I don't die out there. Arti was just like, we know you're not gonna die.

Troy's just like, well, how do you know that? And Arti says, only the good die young. And I was just like, damn, Troy, try to come back. Really Joel? Yeah. Wow. That's a deep joint. Yeah. He tried to come back. Really Joel? Yeah. Wow. That's a deep joint. Yeah.

Yeah. He tried to come back. He really passed that one out there. Really hail. That's a real hail Mary. Throw it on a really Joel song, Larry. Yeah. It makes it stronger though.

Yeah. It makes it stronger. Very good. Like a dad burn. Exactly. That's what it is. Like a dad joke. I can't, like, ah, you shameless fuck.

Yeah. How dare you say that to me and my own face. I got to really own those. Yeah, they don't, they don't stick at all. You can't mumble mouth. No, no, no. A dad joke. No.

Like you making fish? I just found one. Yeah. What did you say? Just for the house. Did you just make that fucking joke? Did that just come out of your mouth? Yeah.

Oh, man. you want to hear more peach ranges from Hazencruz? You get a couple left. People invite you on a podcast just because they totally want to bang you. You know what I'm talking about. We've all been unsuccessful podcasts before with hundreds of thousands of weekly viewers. I see Sean addressing me with his eyes and I don't appreciate it. Like what's with every podcast? I go in people like wanna bang me. But imagine I get that actually happening.

I can see the erotic stories right now. It would totally make more hot goss for Sean's podcast two years from now. The takin' was love it. LOL. All right, I got, let's see, I got a couple more callers. I don't want these guys to call in last week.

Let me see if they're there. Well, you had something else to talk about too. And then somebody's also asking about Lea. No, well, yes, but also Denzel about the pub crawl story. Were we pub crawl story? Was that the one that you preempted? A little bit, yeah. Did I talk over that story?

Yeah, it was just you pub crawl story. The pub crawl story, essentially, I went out with Andy and his girlfriend and they invited a bunch of random single people that they knew. And there was a, there was a girl, we were chatting it up for a little bit, we were getting along well, we were teasing each other. This is the portion of which I said, I was going to take ribbing. Yeah, exactly. So, what was your teasing?

It was, it was just, I don't know, just dumb stuff, like dumb things. Like your mom is so fat. No, no, no. Okay. Just like mocking the way that you throw the bean ball, like a bean bag and corn bowl or whatever. Sure. Like things like that.

It sounds like a, it was a go, no. I think it's shut night. Did I finish this? Where she, maybe I told you, but no. See, now think night did I finish this where she maybe I told you but now See now I understand why I understand why we don't talk about things before the show. Yeah, but anyway So we're teasing each other guy comes up wearing his fucking can go or whatever is fucking Fedora and clearly It's the situation is obvious. He's talking to her But he's including me

for whatever fucking reason. So it doesn't seem like he's a creep or whatever. He comes up, he says, oh, I'm about to go see this movie. I need one of your numbers so I can call you after we finish the show. So we can come back and hang out. And because we've been teasing each other and like, uh, ribbing, ha ha ha, funny, funny stuff,

I don't say anything when it comes up. I thought it was a good, like, uh, ribbing, ha, ha, ha, funny, funny stuff. Yeah. I don't, I don't say anything when it comes up. I thought it was a good like practical joke or a little, uh, a little funny thing. And I just look at her and just smile and I narrow my eyes and I look at her and she looks at me and she's just like, it looks like she's frustrated, but that's, that's just funny to me. Yeah. And so she eventually gives them her number. Wait a minute.

Why does she give them her number? I don't know. What's going on with these women giving out their numbers? Are they in front of you, that's all? This way. Well, I mean, like, I think- Hey, do you have a pen? I'm just trying to have an ask for a pen.

What do you mean? No, oh, she just, I mean, I don't, it was a funny joke to me. It was funny at the time. She's giving out her number in front of you at the Cornhole. You're putting the hour's call. Oh, no, we weren't on a date or anything. This was just as like a group. This is a group thing.

Yeah, and of course, this one, I'll freely admit, I shot myself in the foot for it. Yeah, it sounds. So later in the night, she, because she's frustrated and upset that she gave this guy, gave this guy her number, she comes up to me and she'll be like, or not she'll be like, but she says, you'll never guess who called me. Yeah, the guy you gave you number two. Exactly.

And then, because she was upset and she was an off-trial. You never guess who tricked me out on a date guess you never guess who tricked me out on a date You never guess you tricked me out on two dates. I'll never guess who I dripped off in the car yesterday You'll never guess who I'm dating now three years and because because she came up and she was angry about it I said well, I hope you don't react like that when I call you later. And I'm, no, nothing. She just walks away. She's like, no, I thought that was, I thought that saved it. You have to show more, you have to show more possessiveness.

That's not me, though. You know what I mean? That's not like possessive like that. Well, you have a guy who don't get laid. So do you want to be not you or do you want to be, do you want to be not you getting some ass or do you want to be you? Fair, fair enough. Fair enough. The correct answer is ask.

Yeah. Yeah. Just for a night, for a night, you don't have to be like, you don't have to get shag carpeting and wear a kimono and grow a Pornoma stash and be a different guy. But just right away, you've got to make it clear that you're they're not giving their number away in front of you. Okay. You say, no, that get away. I don't want to see you giving your number out because I'm interested in you. Okay. You got to plant your fucking flag. I am. Yeah. Promise me. I got my nose just to spite my face for a good practical joke.

Or a little hop. The joke is on the other guy, right? Because she's not gonna answer. Yeah, but he's, no, no, no, no, no, man. That's not the way it works. They get a call. I'll take a call. The right, the right, the right, the perfect storm

is always looming on the horizon. Maybe he's, maybe he's got great phone game. Maybe he's out there in a can go hat for God's sake, sir, Fedora. He clearly doesn't care about embarrassing himself. That's public. That's your greatest enemy. Is this fucking guy? Oh, shit.

Don't, you don't discount anybody. This is, this whole dating thing is weird to me. Well, I got a, I can see that. Definitely more difficult than I remember, but ground to my eyes and better shape back in the day. Okay, so here's my Leah Gus. For some reason, Leah, Leah to shown is, is talking shit. She's from the Maddox camp, so that's all they do is go around and troll comments and talking about how I'm a piece of shit and I can't be trusted. And everything that I'm saying is a lie

except nobody's ever got a counter story. Nobody's ever got any evidence of what I'm lying about or a synopsis of what I'm lying about. Nobody even tries to, nobody tries to argue it. They just say that I'm a piece of shit in a lie. I'm trying to find the, the screenshot that I got of what Lee said. Okay, here's what, here's what Lee has said about not prompted at all. I don't think I've ever said shit about her on the show. But apparently she was on Maddox's show last week. So when you're talking about last week, just really quick about the God's gift to Leah Tards.

Oh, Jessica Safran. Oh, yeah. Okay, you've probably never seen her. She's not a baby now. No, that's because you said, now you know who I'm talking about. And I don't know if you're doing it. I'm quite sure who you were talking about. So this is Leah.

She was on Maddox. I later found out that she was on Maddox's show last week. So she was probably all hyped up in her brain. I'm gonna go online and talk shit. I'm gonna really show. I'm gonna weigh in. I'm gonna weigh online and talk shit. I'm gonna really show. I'm gonna weigh in. I'm gonna weigh it into this meme war and show everybody what's up.

Because I'm a woman and I'm used to just everybody listening to me. When I scream, when I throw a fit, people listen. And they do what I want. These men, these men just do what I say. And everybody listens to me. Because I'm a woman, because I'm cute. I could say whatever I want. So she, she wades into the comments section of something.

A dickhead is in there. A dickhead is in there saying he's disappointed that in son of guest for going on Maddox to show up. It's Maddox to shit. So Leo wazin and says, you don't know. Leah says to this dickhead in public, you don't know what you're talking about. It's the other way around saying that I'm the piece of shit.

Oh. So the dickhead says, dick dates is X. Maddox scrapes his name from the old show, makes ridiculous rape of apologize accusations, gives away the bonus episodes and generally tries to ruin is to destroy his reputation. Uh, this is pretty accurate synopsis. Leah's response is, I'm not allowed to comment further, but I'm telling you you have it

backwards. Dick is lying piece of shit, human being, I know him personally. What am I supposed to do about that? It's just implications. Implications. She does know me personally. So people might believe that. Several, several new years ago, new years ago,

Leah moves into Maddox's house. I think she became his roommate for a brief period of time. And she was, she was his friend, I don't know, she was his plus one for a New Year's Eve party at UCB. They used to, UCB used to do these New Year's Eve parties before they got shut down because there was too many instances of sexual assault. Yeah.

Instead of policing their community, this is what I heard. Oh. Instead of policing their community, they just decided to cancel the party. But this was before that. This is when it was a very, it was a small time thing. It was fun, fun party. It was fun, fun party. It was fun for as far as New Year's Eve parties go.

So I remember writing and I was taking a noob or with Maddox and I said, hey, what's going on with Lea? She's cute. Are you guys what? You hooking up? You trying to make that happen? What's going on?

And he said, oh, you know, it's complicated. It's complicated with us. We've known each other for a long time. And I said, hey, let me make this real simple for you because I know you don't understand subtext most of the time. If you don't tell me, don't go after her, I'm going to. So it's either no or nothing. And he goes, well, you know, it's kind of this thing. I said, okay, that's not no. So just so you know, I don't care what you're saying. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, it's not no. That's how it works.

You can say it's a yes or no, but it's really just no or the highway. And if it's not no, then I'm gonna do whatever I want. I'm gonna try to go up this girl. So we rolls around midnight and she's like a hawk. You know, girls get that look where they're looking for something. She's on the lookout, like a hawk up the perched

and every possible corner just scoping out. Who's there? Who's gonna hook up with something? I sighed a lot to her probably around half hour of midnight. I'm like, what's going on? You know, what are you looking for? She's scoping around. It's like, oh, just, you know, somebody to,

somebody to kiss at midnight, right? Like I'll tell you what, you don't find anybody to kiss by one, well, you and I give a shot, right? You know, just plan, throw that out. Cause it's not gonna be, oh, no, baby, it was midnight. I said, if you don't find anybody, my midnight, me and you give a shot, right? So midnight rolls around,

and coincidentally happened to be next door, midnight strikes, and we go, boom, go at it like, matter and time matter, right? Middle of the party. We're in the green room, it's clapping out of time. Boom, clapping out of time. I mean, we're going at it. It's only tensile in the green room at UCB that it clears out the room. It's like, you know, because people are disgusted. They're like, what is this? What

is this display of just depravity you're putting on in front of us? And I was like, hey, all right, this is a pretty good, it's a pretty good new years. It's, I've had worse. So get her number. We go our separate ways and texting her about a second date and things are just not, things are not adding up. We got a hiking date prepared set up and she's saying stuff like set up and it's she's saying stuff like a I want you to think of me as like a like a dude and I'm like uh I don't I don't do these weird games like weird LA crazy chick crafting the narrative yeah this is this I'm gonna tell you who I am so you see me this way yeah or like she regretted the hooking up and it was like, I just wanna be friends,

like okay, I'm gonna make this clear, like I don't wanna be friends, I want to date you. And she's like, oh no, no, no, me too. I don't, I don't remember exactly what I went, but I said, look, the date's off. I'm feeling a little under the weather, dates off, and that was it, that was it. So, flash forward, here's the, here's the guys.

Here's why it's, here's why the whole thing is funny to me that she's running a screen for Maddox by continuing to go out there and slander my name all over the internet, my real name, not any kind of funny way, but just saying she knows me personally and that I'm a piece of shit. Here's the goss. The original problem of the biggest problem in the universe was crying. Maddox brought it in because Leah would not stop crying and he could not shut the fuck up about it.

How she would cry and cry and cry because some dude, some dude she was sprung on was basically banging her like a comrag every time he would come into town. And she would follow him and this is what Maddox told me that she would not stop crying about it. It was driving him crazy. I know who that is. Oh, you know who that is. Well, that's why.

So I don't know why she's out there calling me a piece of shit when I'm not the one telling people about her fucking personal life. You understand what I'm saying? So I see pieces shit. So that crying problem was about her. That was about her. I think they're never going to deny it. You know what?

You know, but all I know is the second I, the second that I tweet about it, all of her comments about me vanish from the face of the earth. Right, it's like waiting in a little bit. You're just, just an hour. Did you just tweet about it? I tweeted right after I saw that because what I've learned with these people is the second you see them going after you, you've got to hit them hard.

You got to come out and say, well, just so everybody knows this is the full history. This is the weird kind of quasi friendship relationships that are being run over there. This is my, if you want to talk about knowing me personally, that is the entire extent of knowing me personally. Is this kind of shit? I wouldn't say that's personally the first, right after the biggest prop, the, this is what really happened to the biggest problem, the rapeless video got launched, I immediately get texts from her saying, I know what you did.

You're an evil person. Where are the W-9s? And that was the first time I had ever seen the phrase W-9. So I said, who the fuck, what the fuck are you talking about W-9? I didn't know that they were W-9s until months later. What do you mean? Everybody just referred to everything as like financial documents or statements or statements.

Oh yeah, W9 is just a request for your information. You're social security. I know, but I was nabbing over this ad nauseam. So it's like, I found that out later and I was like, wait, what? That's... Yeah. All right. The very first time I ever heard the phrase W9s was in a text from Leah, who called me an evil piece of shit, and that I need to wear the fucker the W9s. And I said, what the fuck are you talking about? A W9, I texted her back, a W9 is a request for a social security number. It has nothing to do with filing your taxes. Not a amount.

Or an amount. It is in no way, she said, what about all the hidden? I said, it's not hiding financial documents. So while these fucking lunatics are over at the Madcast studios, clearly still, still to this fucking day running this outrageous libel campaign wherever they can reach wherever they think they can get away with it on the internet I will just say this this is how I know them personally and this is the hot-gawse on lia

that the original crying problem was about her I would find that suspect I would find that suspect I would find that suspect. I don't know how bad. I don't know how bad she wants to get back at a guy who canceled a date after hooking up on New Year's Eve. I don't know if this is some kind of weird, like weird gossipy brainwash shit because Maddox knows so much about her that she can't possibly wander away. I don't know what it is. I don't know why. I don't know why everyone over there so addicted to running this line

that I'm a piece of shit and held W9s from everybody. Is that video still up? Oh yeah. Okay. Yeah. All right. That's it for the show this week. You've been listening to the Dix show.

Denzel, thanks for coming by. We'll know nerd hours. Real nerd hours on SoundCloud, right? Yes, SoundCloud. You can find us on Reddit, reddit.com slash r slash rule nerd hours. You can follow me on Twitter at that Denzel. Yeah, thank you for having me, Dick.

I appreciate it. Thanks for coming by. Go to dick.show, thedixhow.com, Patreon.com slash. The Dix show, we got the April Fool's episode 108 coming out on April fool's day Check out Philly road rage. You see everybody there dress like Sean. We're gonna have a great Sean alike Constell road rage dress like a normal human. I got a big sash for the road rage contest This outro is called we can see that by Todd side del

See next Tuesday Dic Dic Dic Dic Dic Dic Dic Dic Dic master said just just just just just ease into it See you next Tuesday. When you walk outside, the entire city is thawing an ocean. Is thawing an ocean. It's on the stars of failure. The city of broken dreams. City of failure. City of failure. These people have turned it into a city of desperation and failure.

The dream is just, I want to have an album. That just trips out of the hole. There's no dreams in these people's souls. There's no choices. Pulling everyone in the town down. And the dream is just, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want to, I want I just don't wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna wanna operative. It's too hard. It's a lane beat. I like this a lot. Let's go. Punch in the city, you failed your study if failure

These people with the level of narcissism in their DNA because people with rampant narcissism with that is so toxic that it is actually a virus of naked Yeah, we did that, we covered that We can see the devil about the devil. We can see the devil about the devil. We can see the devil about the devil. And he comes right behind the time of the day. Yeah, anyway. Man, that leaves you really fucking pisses me off. Because I think she's that, I think she's been on Reddit talking the same kind of shit.

Really? Well, it's the fuck-ups. It's the W9's plural. It's the thing is, like, at least for me personally, when some shit like this happens between people I know, I just stay out of it. Because if it's not your business, it's not your fucking business, why get involved.

Even if you're, that would be me suddenly going out and talking shit. I've met Maddox one time. It's not my business. This between you and him. Yeah. I don't get it. So fucking weird, man. The whole thing's weird. Yeah. I mean the whole the whole the way they live is weird. Like the weird incest to it. It's like the way to like dependent on one another's drama and issues. Like it's fucking the, the gods that they spit is just bizarre. And I like I said, I got miles of it. I keep fucking with me.

Keep going online talking shit. We'll see what happens. I will say however, I think Leah is pretty funny on Twitter. She's got some pretty hot jokes. Yeah. She's funny. Nuts. Pfft.

Why would you read a book at a bar? Ah, it's an idiot. Idiots to all of you. Okay, I'll break it down. As somebody, a man who reads books in bars. Fucking loose. No longer. Does what you are wearing, what you look like, what you sound like, or the pattern in which you exist, matter at all, for what type of woman you will attract. It just matters. What the fuck are you reading? So you're

sitting there, you're reading the five love languages virtue, saying you're going about how compassionate and how understanding you are boom psychology major. You're sitting there. You're reading philosophy books. Boom philosophy major. That's assuming you're not in the college town. It's just a way to signal. Hey, you've been doing here. You see what you're thinking? Are you thinking the same thing that I'm thinking? You're definitely right.

You're definitely right. It's a sign that you want to be talk to. But if they sign, oh, who you want to talk to, not gonna be them. It's a sign that you're fucking weirdo, bringing a book to a fucking bar. It's so poorly lit and most bars anyway. Are you fucking kidding me?

Oh, look, I'm out here dressed, trying to get eye strain. Look at me over here with my fucking book. I can't read it. Oh, why are you upset by that? That's bullshit advice. All right, I'll go do it. I'll go do it next weekend. Go to a bar with a fucking book. Not in the pitch black. Oh, sick. Where's a well lit bar? Any bars have lights. What are you gonna read? What am I gonna? I'm gonna find something by play though. No, no, you have to, you have to find something that's chick friendly.

I don't know what that means. Like the pride and prejudice, but with zombies, you ever hear that book? Where they take pride and prejudice, but they like rewrite half of it. So it's also a zombie hunting adventure. Do that one because then because it looks like pride and prejudice. So you might get a girl who just wants to talk about Pride and Prejudice, but it's also, you get the zombie angle.

So you get like the, like the girls who are into, you know, zombies and shit, weird cosplay tricks, who are into that kind of thing. Okay. You got that angle too. All right, I'll go do it. I'll report back. Try anything.

Do that. Read a book called, how to spend a shitload of money haha haha that's a huge dick read that dealing with an enormous penis dot com that the book read that book okay okay haha read a book called your dad just get a book that says your dad and read fire that up I sit in there just read a book that says your dad and read, fire that up, I ain't sitting there.

Just read a bunch of AA pamphlets. I'm just gonna print out fake book covers. Just put a book on anything. Yeah, I'm gonna try. For real, I mean. Test A, B tested. I'm going to, we're gonna find out because that sounds like a load of bullshit to me.

Denzel, have you ever worn a tie before? Yes, I have. Why? How was it any weirder than that? It was required because I was playing basketball at the time for the schools. Yeah. It's up nice on game nights.

You were nice shoes. How was it any weirder than wearing nice shoes out to a bar? Reading a book. Why don't you wear a nice shoe? Because reading a book in a bar is impractical. It's impractical. Nine dollar beers are impractical. All this book and a bar is impractical. It's impractical. Nine dollar beers are impractical. All this shit that we do,

it is impractical. All of it, none of it makes any sense. Okay, okay. Give it a shot. All right, I know what you got to lose. Nothing. You got plenty of room to write their numbers down. And you got to, you can bash when guys come around

to get their numbers. You bash them on the head with the book. You throw it at them. Get out of here. Tear the pages out and throw it at them. Get the hell out of here. I could imagine how it would work. I'm reading my book, Girl walks up.

Oh, hello. Fucking. What's wrong with that? That's bullshit. You know what it is? You want girls to like you for you. No, not anymore. Not anymore.

Not anymore. I learned that when I was you. No, not anymore. I think it is. Not anymore. I think you do. I learned that when I was younger. No, because the problem with that is I'm constantly changing, right? Like, it's basically a moving target. And you say, I'm constantly changing the hook. I'll change anything for you. The book.

I actually had that, something along the lines of that in my dating profile. I was like a little joke. Like I'm constantly changing one of the top six things I couldn't do without changing myself. I'm gonna see if I get something else here. Yeah, Tom McCoy again, another age, helicopter co-workers.

The kind of people that like, you might even outrank them, and yet they still try to order you around in the most annoying way. And that is in the form of asking, do you want to? You got cut off. It's a good point though. Do you want to? Do you want to do that? You want to do, uh, I noticed that you're not doing this, but do you wanna,

do you wanna do this? Yeah. No. I've seen it. I don't. I'm gonna let you go. Especially it's like, do they think, do they think they're like an authority figure or a boss? Or like, yeah, like, what are you doing?

What are you doing? What do you wanna do here? Yeah. It's annoying. I'm gonna let you go now, Sean. Okay, I'm gonna let you go. Thanks. I know that's what you wanna do. Yeah. It's annoying. I'm gonna let you go now, Sean. Okay. I'm gonna let you go. Thanks.

I know that's what you want to do. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm gonna, I want to go, but I'm gonna let you go. Yeah. Because you're in convincing me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm deciding, you know, the interplay we're having here. Don't put this on me.

I'm gonna let you go. I'm gonna put that evil on you. Yeah. You're the one that's itching, itching to go. No, it's not me. I'm telling you that. Yeah. I'm not making any decisions here. No,ching, itching to go. It's not me. I'm telling you that. Yeah, I'm not making any decisions here. No, no, I can absolutely tell.

I can read your mind. You want to go, so I'm going to go ahead and let you go. Yeah. Do you want to do this? Say no. I dare you to say no to that. Do you want to do this? I fucking guess so.

I guess everything's got gotta be an altercation. It's not just do this right now. Excuse me. You wanna do that? Yeah, I guess. I guess I do. I wanted to the whole time, and I just didn't know it until you figured it out for me.

Right, the plus one. And it's for me that I did wanna do this. Let's get out of here. See you guys. Bye. you figured it out for me. Right. And it's for me that I did want to do this. Let's get out of here.

See you guys. Bye.