The Dick Show - Episode 479 - Dick on The Pie Piper

Episode Date: October 6, 2025

A fluffy Latina gets taken down by ICE, baby radio, a man named "Jihad" walks into a synagogue, a bird that yells "help", Community Relations Service is dead, P Diddy court drawings, the healing power of a fried foot, a reality-based ninja, Israel takes a 10/7 VR experience to Christian colleges, and Schizo Sean gets Aaron Imholte thrown in jail; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Yeah, that's better. My original question before the audio was turned on was, have you ever sang that song to a woman? But you... Don't sing, yeah. Don't start. I don't, yeah. Hmm.

I find myself... I find myself thinking about Black Mirror episodes longingly. Now, I was in the shower before the show. And I was remembering, I always remember that the Christmas episode of when Don Draper gets stuck in like a computer simulation that runs for like a million years or something as a punishment for him being like a pedophile or something. I don't remember the episode, but I know he gets stuck in a time loop. And I watched that episode, first time I'm going like, oh man, ooh, I got a sick feeling. Oh man, imagine all that. And it's nothing to people.

They just go, they just dial it up, right? slow time down and he's in there being stuck in a time loop. With that Kelly Clarkson song, right? You remember when that first came out? I unfortunately. Oh, man. I was like, oh no. I was in there going, oh, no.

And a night and it stuck with me for all these years, but I found myself in the shower away from the baby screaming for the first time. It's the only time you can escape the baby is in the shower, basically. Thank God I've been saying how long I took shower. hours, you know, my whole life. Like, I'll be in there for like an hour and a half. I'll be back and, you know, when he goes to kindergarten. I found myself in the shower thinking of randomly thinking thoughts, and I found my mind wandering to that Christmas episode of, um, of, uh, black mirror and kind of thinking of it fondly. Like, I wish I could get stuck in a time loop of

being in the shower. Uh, I wish I could get stuck in that time loop of Don Draper being stuck in the time loop for a thousand years? I would say, give me a little more. I'd say, what a pleasant song. Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da, you know? Lock me in that time loop. What do you guys got? What else you got in the black mirror thing? Where could I be trapped somewhere that's not here? Some sort of a teddy bear that can only express two things. Y'all take it. In a museum, and the museum closes and there's no babies screaming. Is that right? I'll take it. crank that knob up crank it up

you gotta take a trip to Flavortown man I need to is that is that Marlborough the Marlboro man or is that Bobby Flai Guy Fieri But I imagine it's somewhere on the outskirts One of those fuckers

Yeah one of those I need to go to Marlborough country That's what was their slogan Step into Marlboro country Fucking smoke a million packs And get all our cool merch And I need a fucking Marlboro points to have a time loop

that I could get stuck in Jesus How many Marlboro points can I get one of those fucking computer simulations and gets stuck in a time loop? That would be crazy. Anywhere, but here...

If you started collecting since they offered the points incentive till now, I think that you would be like one of the only people to unlock that. Just changed your perspective. You know, it just seems like a existential torture

and then it just seems like a pretty good vacation a couple thousand years no big deal well you gotta think of where in your life isn't there existential torture the baby wouldn't notice because it's just in the show

it was like a lunchtime it was like an hour but me I get a thousand years to just relax and listen to Christmas music and listen to wonderful Christmas music usually you gotta wait all year for that right yeah it's just the way

you gotta change your perspective on things that's what a thousand whole years of it. So what else you got? You got any more dread in there? Did all you any of you, DEI Netflix writers, come up with some existential dread for me? Oh yeah, some kind of

a computer machine that kills everybody. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's cool. We'll see there's judge dread and then there's existential dread too. Ah, okay. I didn't even open my stuff today. Oh, God, I got good stuff today. Oh, good. Way Watchers!

At the end of the month The Weight Watchers will find the great pumpkin Yeah Welcome to Dick You want Dick, you need to Dick, you love to you get it It's the show where it's a contest Coming to live from Mount Bunker Deep in the heart of the city of failure

My host Dick Masters and aka the $20 million other man Joining me as always is world touring No, it's just regular Just regular tour See ya last listener, Johnny Johnny the regular engineer How's it going man? Good since I was thinking about that black mirror thing.

It's like, ah, that's a nice fantasy to have. Because before kids you fantasize about, like, you know, what if I was, like, banging a bunch of chicks? What if I was, like, reincarnated as a slime? And there's all these fucking anime hoars, you know, banging. That's a cool fantasy. But now I can't have that fantasy. I'm like, well, who's looking after my son?

I can't be being a slime. Yeah. be being reincarnated as no slime. I can't go, I can't take a vacation. You got shit to do now. I got shit to do, man. I got this little fucker. I got this little fucker that they're going to try to turn

gay or something while I'm gone. I can't be doing that. But I can fantasize about being stuck in a time loop. That's cool. No victims. Victimless time loop crime. Here's another thing I can fantasize. Where can I go to where can I go to sign up for this

man? Where can I go to take a part of this? Where can I take part of this that I'm looking at here? Okay, maybe if I could just pull this on up here. If I could just go ahead and... This is a fat woman that got, yeah. She literally was asking a question. This is downtown, LA, I think. She's just asking a question.

Pretty lightweight. You see here, Johnny, this is when the, this is the type of Mexican woman where the ass the ass is so fat it becomes tight you know the slope of the ass looks like a spirograph and then it goes right up into the asshole at the end we're reaching critical ass right

there's so much weight around the side that it's you know it does some fat women especially Latinas have this sort of gravitational singularity in their nether regions here that sucks

in all the clothes. It looks like someone's taking a fist and punched right up their asshole and pulled all the pants and the clothes. Sometimes you'll even see their sweatshirt tucked up in their asshole. You know, and you can see them walking. And they have this weird

like, like, well, it's like how those rice farmers in Indonesia have to wear masks on the back of their head so tigers don't bounce on them. Oh, yeah. They have to look the same from the back in the front so it's like a defense mechanism so you can't if they're walking toward or away from you.

What predator is looking at this and seeing a, like, an endless tunnel? You're looking. The cops. Is there some cholo walking or swimming in the ocean with his jeans on that sees this and goes, oh, I'm going to stay in the ocean? Watch this. Unfortunately not enough. Look at this.

Wait a minute. Come on, come on. Come on. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, there. She's lipping off. She's lipping off. Look at her. Look at her.

Look at it. Oh, what are you doing? What are you doing, Poppy? Poppy, what aren't you doing? No! No, she's about four feet tall. Four feet tall got a singularity up her ass sucking in all the jeans and shit

and five of these ice guys beat the shit. Take her down. Look at her jiggling. Look at her jiggling. She's trying to work on it. Oh, they're taking... Look at her gut. Oh, no. Oh, shit.

Look at her gut. She's got that flan stomach. They got the whole... Flon's stomach. They got the whole shirt off so she can't even pull it down. They're teaching ice hockey moves now. They're like, all right, when these fucking singularity ass latinas, when these black hole ass having latinas come at you,

you grab the sweatshirt, the, the, the California State, the CSUB. Right. What sweatshers? They're never wearing UCLA. Dodgers. UCSB. Take the UCSB sweatshirt, pull it over the head. Like hockey, right?

Pull it over their head, and then start tickling them. Start wailing on them. Start beating the flound out of them. Like a test. They got their drawing and cornering the fat latinas. That's what they should be doing with the horses. Quartering their ass. If you see four police horses in a row, you fucking get.

Get one of these, and they're all walking like their asses shouldn't try. Their assholes are trying to escape from their mouths. That's how they're walking. Ooh, ooh, aye, eye, puppy! Aye! Take me! Find me. Look at our getting dragged.

Where? Where do I go to sign up for this? And how much does it cost? Where can I go? I don't want to work. I don't want a job at Homeland Security. I just want to go in for the weekend. Like a volunteer firefighter?

Let's go. I got three good matches It greased me up I want an entrance I want an entrance like The fucking The Devastator Or something like that

Or like Cesar like Give me like a pun for Caesar Chavez Or something like the ravine Caesar salad Chavez These are salad Chavez right The Salad Man And I come out and it's like Charlie Kirk's funeral like

Firework shooting off And I'm like yeah let me at her Let me at her right And you just pay like a couple you pay like a thousand bucks you get greased up draw some abs on you and then they'll say like

that one right there that Latina's been lipping off and you're like oh let's go brother alright you tight out you fat bitch you tweety bird you're like an upside down

tweety bird where all the fat is on your legs instead of the head let's go bitch it's go time cockadoodle do right they would probably receive so much funding

because if you had to pay to do that and then there's like a bell ding ding you got a wrestler you get three minutes so we fuck shit up wrestle that bitch

damn see it oh they bleeped out something popped out of her I don't know what it is not a pussy I know that sexual assault is happening right now take her off the top rope all right fucking the Latina crusher

boom Take her from the top of what she's a hanging salami or something. Don't make these guys blow a hammy. Let me do, let us do it. A lot of guys, a lot of guys in L.A. that have been fucked around by fat Latinas, whether at the dentist. Wherever Bryman sells you a certificate to go work,

that is where you'll find a fat Latina that has fucked me over. Just post that out of front of every Burlington coat factor. Every dental office, VC repair, whatever those idiots sell vocational degrees on, that's where Fat Latina has lied in weight and fucked me over somehow and inconvenienced me and not understood something obvious. Come in there. I like that she was lying in wait. They called me the day job.

I'm and I'm coming for you fat Latinas. Line them up. You right there, right? She's like, what? What's he even talking to? Wham! Off the top rope. I'll bring my own ring.

Oh, that'd be great I gotta get the I'll get her in the My signature move Will be like a figure four Like Brett the hitman heart And I'll put her leg in there And get that stomach out

And then play it like Like Ricky Ricardo Oh yeah Babaloo Right Ah ha ha ha ha Right Oh

Whap And I slap her friends You gotta call yourself Brett heart problems Brett heart we're going to find the great pumpkin at the end of the month for Weight Watchers I have a lot of good submissions

I've been throwing my slow cooker I've been kind of saving them up too I'm man I'm it took everything in me not to just bring in like 10 of them you mean like that for Weight Watchers yeah I got a whole everybody's got bringing their A game to that Bonus content.

That's what I'm saying. I got my D.K. Fat banana hoard going on. My banana pudding hoard. I don't know. It's just something about the way, you don't need five cops to handle one fat Mexican woman.

You need one guy. Well, you do, because if you think about it, there is, when they probably signed on, there's like a 50 pound weight limit, right? Like baggage handlers?

Yeah, or like if you're like moving, like UPS or anything, can you lift? They need those weight belt. The fridge mover deals Get a dolly Yeah

In there Well so between Like Hannibal Lecter But there's a fat Mexican Ah Yeah But I lead your liver with anything

Poppy She Because even though she's only Four feet tall It takes five people To get 50 pounds each Yeah Roughly

Because it's like a beanbag Right You know There's no side to it Really Um you know that black mirror episode i'm talking about i do it's been forever since i've seen it gives you like a feeling of like unease that technology would be used for something like that but not me

it's giving me a feeling of like a relaxed feeling the fact that that would be the episode to make people feel uneasy about technology when it's like you should just always be uneasy about technology that was a good episode though it is don't Anything with Don Draper is usually a good episode. Did you see the pictures of P. Diddy? No. That he got four months in jail for, man, I'll say, here's something that makes me rage. So, like, when your baby's crying, you drive it around, and the baby goes to sleep.

I don't know why. It sounds, it probably because the car just sounds like a womb kind of. It's like, you know, a white noise. Like, oh, zh, right? so I'm in the we're in the car with the baby and I put on I'm like looking for like relaxing music you know not Christmas music

because the only songs I know that I'm singing to the baby is Christmas music I wish I would have learned some other songs but I didn't so um you're not gonna sing a monster fuck for Halloween Monster fuck I only know that one line it's the monster fuck

I've been monster fuck trothing people for years now. Which part? I'm like, well, you know what it was called before the FCC made a change. Oh, yeah. Like, no. Like, well, it's the monster fuck, obviously.

Like, so I find this, like, lullabies station. And I put it on. Do you know there's more than one verse to twinkle, twinkle little star? First of all, do you know that? There's a sequel?

The other verses suck. Yeah. They're written like the Bible. They're stupid. they've they came up with such a good first part not expecting it to take off kind of like the friends theme right yeah and then afterward they're like well we need it to be a full song you're like ah shit song sucks now i mean it sucked to begin hearing the rest of it somehow makes it hearing the rest of it's like it's like it's like written by like like beowulf or something it's like what the fuck yeah it was like a i tricks to pawn like this sounds this sounds totally stupid do it again just do it again just do it again it's fine yeah just do it again the first verse is a banger twinkle twinkle little star everyone that loves it where are you i don't know but the second one is like and when the it's like doesn't need to be like a whole story about the star they couldn't have just wrote like refrain afterwards so you know

to sing the whole thing again thinking about not doing drugs or something do something make it about immigration. Yeah, but you've got to know the history of the atomic particles in fucking space, man. Um, so we're putting on this little baby baby, baby radio station on series XM. And it's like moon, moonbeams for babies radio. And I'm like, oh, thank fuck. It's in my mind I know about how far far I have to drive, drive. He stops crying at the, uh, what used to be a CVS. and is now a homeless encampment. That's where, what used to be a wonderful CVS.

That was a good CVS, too. Which is now, and a bowling alley across the street, which used to be a dope bowling alley, also now homeless encampment. He stops crying right about there. That was a dope bowling alley, too. Fuck.

Lucky Lanes, lucky stars. Cheap as shit, too. Yeah, maybe that was the problem. Although, how much can you charge for bowling? Like $10,000 a game? I don't know. You should be able to, yeah. if you could smoke inside again

I would pay $10,000 to play bowling Maybe we can again You know Maybe we can Japan just elected some kind of female Hitler Cool Who hates all immigrants and says Women should take men's last names

It should be illegal for them not to And I at first I was like Ugh But then I thought Why am I like Institutionalized like that Of course they should What's the hell's the point of getting married?

Like the whole, why would they get the choice of that part? Fuck them. Make them do it. Fuck them. It's a business concept. Give them something to fight again. Give them some. If you, we gave them that.

Like, we're like, well, it's not a big deal, right? Oh, sure. You guys can keep your names. Like, okay, also, we want to cut a little boy's penises off. Whoa. Let's go back to the name. Actually, let's go back to the name thing. The science is.

on that hasn't been decided yet verdict is about to come out now we got to go back we got to return to anyway they got some kind of a female Hitler that hates all immigration stuff it's pretty good for them

it's cool for them you know so the the baby radio station just playing twinkle twinkle twirls are the crappy one with extraverses that don't make it better um

and the baby goes I'll have to sleep oh yes thank god he's out and then the song ends and it goes it cuts to one of those interstitial radio things goes hey you've been listening to moonbeam radio

the song that's six little kids lullabies for you kids to sleep and I look over and I see his eyes go like this like like Bob Barker I'm happy you going Oh, man.

Who knew they had the jerk store on the Moonbeam radio, too? Does you guys have to... Yes, they have to. It's the radio. It says it on the thing. You don't need this shit, man. It's not the radio unless there's some sort of fucking jerk store. What's wrong with radio people? Why they always want to be like, hey, I'm fucking Johnny jerk ass. Like, whoa, look at me!

Dude, they can't help it, man. it's wrong with them it's the radio dude it like fucks up their brains people think the radio is just like I'm saying things and it goes out into the world

but it's like it's a two way street right should be right like they're fucking all everyone's hateful thoughts are getting like like god the fully the worst person

in the world was telling me what fucking song this was right now and that all gets transmitted back and then they become the avatar for everyone's hatred you've been listening to twinkle twill oh sorry next we gotta have a little black sheep

blah blah blah Either that or whoever the director of programming is over there is fucking hysterical. Like, oh, you don't really fucking get our listeners on. Like, this is for parents, you shitheads. This isn't for, this, it's not a radio station for babies. It's for parents that are putting it on to knock their kids out. Could you imagine if it was a baby bumper? And he's like, hey, that's going like, go-go-go-go-go-go-gago.

Pooping your pants. It's not for babies, fuck-head. And guaranteed, too, this asshole is sitting at Siri. with fucking sunglasses on talking about all this shit too. Like you could say that's the most safest channel because it's only babies listening to it and their parents. You could say, hey, come for poop ass, everybody.

Hey, come for our poop ass. You're listening to the fucking moonbeam shit. Just hush tones. It really fucking sucks what you're going through. I've been there. I've got two kids. I don't know why I had the second one. It fucking sucks.

Anyway, back to Boba Blacksheep. That would be, if that was an actual radio channel. Sponsored by Trojan condoms. You fucked up. Take over the whole airwaves. No middle kids are listening. Don't worry about it. Hey, some fucking Muppet is doing the ad. I'm like, ah. A bunch of fart sounds and like trash can noise.

I started strangling my wife just because I was so mad. I got nobody else. I know it's not your fault, but I got nobody else a triangle. go. Hey, Gans! That's a big fucking problem, man. It's a fucking baby station. That's funny.

Oh. He's waking up and I'm like, I'm like, don't move, don't move, don't move. I'm through my teeth, I go, to my wife, I go, what the fuck is this? She goes, she goes, while you were out of town, I was listening to this, it did the same thing. And she says, and I thought,

I can't wait till he hears one of the, these when he gets back. She, it's a good thing she waited. I'm gonna find those fuckers. I'm gonna find, I'm gonna find, I'm gonna find those fuckers at Moonbeam Radio. Serious XM, you fucking

listen to me, you cock suckers. I'm gonna find you, I'm gonna wake your kids up in the middle of the night. I'm gonna stand, I'm gonna go outside your house revving my fucking motorcycle in the middle of the night. Broom, brim, brim. And then when you come out, you're like, hey, can you keep a bird just like, hey, I'm just running on a fucking motorcycle out, dude! You're gonna ride it into his living room.

It's like a, it's like South Park Canadian guys. Hey, I don't have a fucking morbid radio guy. Put your baby to sleep guy. Dude, I can't. Fucking, that was the death of radio. Is everyone needing to be a fucking guy? Just like, shut the fuck up. They have a guy of the radio, guy.

Like, what happened is being like, hey, here's this song, here's that's coming up next, and here's ads, okay? Here's a song. It sucks. Yeah. I don't like it anyway. I'm only allowed to play 25 different songs anyway, so here you go. God, that's so fucking annoying. I'm going to write my own twinkle, twinkle little starb. Send that in.

Twinkle, twinkle, twinkle, shut the fuck up. Shut your fucking ass up. I'm going to write him a letter. Dear to whom it may concern. Candy Graham. My grandparents survived the Holocaust. That's how I'm started. They're dead now, but they would really be disappointed.

They would really hate what you've done. You've scared my child awake with your fucking moonbeam piece of shit radio. You moonbeam fucking piece of shit? You moonbeen ass, motherfucker. And I got a bird. Get this. I don't like where this is going, yeah You won't believe this

I'm going to tell you this and you won't believe it You'll think I'm exaggerating We'll be surprised I'm calling it out I'm calling you out now Okay I have a bird Or something Out

At night Outside of my house And I swear to God It yells help help that's fucking funny help

and I I have just dealt with it you know for 10 years I'm like it's some fucking bird right still going

yeah what the fuck but now my wife's up you in the middle and she's like what is going what's going on out there like

I don't know some fucking bird that yells help I don't, I don't know. Help bird, don't pay attention to it. Don't pay attention to it. I actually don't know. I just assumed it was a bird.

At first I thought it was a lady. Well, yeah. Okay. It's fucking yelling help at night. But it's a bird. That's crazy. He yells help. That's really distracting.

It's an old fucking bird, too. Help! I swear to God. I don't know what kind of bird it is, somebody would know, but anyway. It's like the, fucking boy in the heron it's this thing

trying to it's some kind of a demon yeah trying to like lead you into some Miyazaki like nether world where you're fucking have to go save the whole world and kill God that is what that was about spirited away same thing

I would think that movie like oh that gave me like the chills right now I think that awesome I'll turn into one of those pigs or whatever probably be fine I'll get out someday it only took like an hour and a half it's fine yeah right

um oh yeah the p ditty pictures should you do those are the government shut down stuff I think the the nothing nothing ever happens guy I think that guy is on life support

I used to be that guy I used to be that guy too man I think it's happening man shit's happening Aaron Mhold's going to jail Aaron Mold is going to jail Aaron Moll got more jail time than Nick Cricketa.

But he deserves more. I mean, he deserves more for being a rat. How does... It's just amazing how far you can get people or how far you can watch people go, right? And you can always... The one thing I've learned in working with people because you can always count on someone

to fuck that up. Somehow, some way... Doing cute shit. Doing cute shit. Well, I can't say this, but I can say this. You know what I'm sick of when it comes to cute shit, by the way? Is fucking trombone players. Why do they do?

It's always got to work the word bone into something, right? They do? Yeah, I only recently found out about this in working with trombone players and picking up some records and stuff. There's this record by this guy, Jeff Bradshaw. Okay. Called Bone Deep. And I'm like, are you fucking serious?

And the art is a terrible collage. It looks fun. It's not a record you would normally pick up, just based on the art alone. Yeah. But then you look at the back and it's like, the bone is back. Like, bone daddy. And I'm like, okay, could you just, like, could we not with all this? I'm boned out.

Yeah. I'm going to bone out. Yeah, nothing but bones. Oh, yeah. Like, I fucking get it. You play trombone. How about some trompons? Well, that's what I was thinking, too.

No, that's not cool. But boned. It's like you're a skeletal. traumatic music. You're fucking fucking skeletons if you're fucking put bone in your name

you know like that would be a good one fucking skeletons skeleton fucker yeah oh shit this guy must be crazy

and it's like no he must play a good trombone yeah Jesus Christ but yeah I just this cute shit

is always like needs to be put to a stop everywhere I'm tired of it he's going to jail I can't believe it that's crazy

don't be doing cute shit just don't I mean he's happy about it, so I'm happy, I guess. Why be sad for a happy guy? He's got a good outlook. Nothing good.

Not like a good... As long as he's got a Microsoft outlook, then he's fine. He's got it. He's got it made. He's got it. He's got it. Get some good stories. That's all you can ever hope for in life is at least a good story, if not for nothing else.

What a fucking disaster that turned into. People go into jail, you didn't come. Will you call? Just none of it. I want to see how small ball it gets And man, we're like I think we're going to see

I think we're going to get into the small ball I think we're going to be dealing with our C and C precision level small ballery Yeah Like 0.000 101 nanometer tolerances for Trying to put a You know

This mill smack Stab a grain of rice Did Yeah The government shut down That's cool Yeah, did you see That Jeffrey's guy

Freaking out about his sombrero memes No, but that's funny You didn't see that? Let me pull one of those up Something Jeffreys Like Hassan Jeffreys Senator I don't know

Trump put him in a Is it? Is that his name? Hakeem Sorry Hakeem Jeffreys Sombrero memes Cool

Trump put him in the sombrero And then he's been crying Wait that's not Photoshopped on Yeah yeah that's Photoshopped Oh okay Trump Trump photoshoped him Because I was like there's no fucking way

He's wearing it And I'm like that's crazy No the mustache either So he's been melting down He's been melting down About it so much That's the only thing my dad Knows about the shutdown

He's like hey did you see the You know that shutdown He said yeah And he goes you see that guy that got to sombrero No, your dad's cool He gets it I think he's on the news

Talking about how it's so offensive I'm like I don't think I don't think a black guy Could complain about wearing a sombrero I don't think it works that Like if they put a Mexican guy In a do rag or something

Then yeah go for it But you can't You can't I'll be goddamned If I'm gonna sit here And let a black guy Be offended about a sombrero and a big awesome mustache.

Well, he should have copy and pasted the other guy's glasses onto the other guy. Chuck Schumer? Yeah. Let me see. It's like something equally is meaningless. So then they made another one Mariachi. Sombrero gate. After he got upset. Is this the one with the mariachi's?

Uh, dang it. I should have found it. It's so hard to find anything now. It is. Hakeem Hakeem Mariachi So when they put this one

Uh Come on Come on Come on Yeah this one Don't care We'll get you nowhere So you got

Damn This is him being Pissed off about the initial Sombrero meme then Trump made a whole a band of Trump Mariachi that

the American people in the face of an unprecedented Republican a man I don't think we've had a funnier president

in history that's incredible yeah oh man they're both out there and I think well I don't know I hope

that the right side is kind of doing it like as a bit, like I have your cake and eat it too. Yeah. But they're both blaming each other for something that I've wanted my entire life. Like, well, they're shutting it down. And they're like, and the other guys are like, no, they're shutting it down. I'm like, I just want to know who I can thank for the, this is literally what I voted for.

So. I actually came to pay my taxes for the first time now. Yeah. It would be like they're having a big gunfight in Congress killing each other. Like, they started. I'm like, I don't give a shit. Great. Yeah.

keep going whoever started it we'll make a big plaque for you hang it out front here died 400 assholes then thanks to this guy right here he caused it great got rid of them finally

that's fun and they and they got rid of here's something I didn't know either they got rid of the community relations service so they're using Trump's using this as an excuse to go through and fire people that he other

like couldn't fire unless congress was doing it that's cool i don't know if this this could all be bullshit like nothing ever happens guy he survived he survived a lot every time i think something's gonna happen he fucking pulls through and nothing happens but it's getting it's looking closer and closer to his demise the vultures are circling that nothing ever happens guy look there's always a changing of the guard, right? Mm-hmm. Something happened at some point, didn't it? Something did happen.

I remember things. Something must have happened. And then there was a period, there was thousands of years of nothing happening, and then someone broke the magic spell, and then things started happening. And then something happened. Yeah. But there was something called the Community Relations Service. This is, I don't know how funny it is.

Apparently, it was like a, it's a top secret group of agents from the government. that go around when a black person kills a white person and like threatens or manipulates the white person of going on TV and saying

let's not make this about race that's like their whole that's their whole purpose Jesus and you can't FOI you can't get any information from what they were doing

because they had every local news agency had a deputized conciliator it says and they had media guidelines

for diffusing racial tensions so that's why this group that was started the Civil Rights Act and funded

like for the last 60 years that's why every time there's some crazy murder the parents and the white

people go on TV and say we don't want to make this about race yeah I was just thinking about that

guy at the soccer game yeah it's like every like Like, I don't know if this is a coincidence or what, but the last couple times someone has been murdered by black guy. The, like recently, a kid got murdered and they let the guy off, you know, like slap on the wrist, like usually got out of jail. And the dad said, I'm going to find him and kill him.

And I'm like, this is new. This is usually they would say something like, well, you know, I just want everyone to go back to normal. And it's really about like lack of education that killed my kids, you know. But this guy was like, yeah, I'm going to find him and kill him. Oh, Jesus, what the hell's going on here? Um, and apparently it's because of this, uh, this X-Files type of organization where they send federal agents to fuck with you if you were the, uh, the victim of race violence. That's crazy. That's fucking crazy.

That's really fucking crazy. That's really crazy that we didn't know about it. The CRS was the racial source. censorship arm of the DOJ signed into law with the Civil Rights Act its function was to threaten and silence the families of white victims of racial crimes

uh yeah how about that so I guess things will get a lot more interesting now at least TV interviews will get a lot more interesting a little more honest people will try to outdo each other and reenact

American History Acts I guess oh shit yeah think about that it makes sense though like there's a bunch of there's a bunch of clips of like black community leaders talking about how

wait let me see if I have one probably not but you've heard a million of them where they're like well you know we don't want to we don't want to we don't want to be too hard on these criminals it's really white people

that's the problem you know and it makes I was thinking about it I'm like yeah I guess I've had a bunch of like murderous criminals walking around the ghetto? I would say that too, probably. Actually, it's those guys over there that are the real problem.

It's nobody here. Yeah. It's those guys. So if you were going to be stabbing anyone, go over there, do it to them. Yeah, pretty interesting. Let's see, here's a here's a gotcha game for horrors. I guess.

It's like half the Steam games, right? Yeah, but it's real life. Oh. Look at this. So you go, you pay. Is this for horrors, or is this just cosplay? Fuck this is just cosplay.

And then you get a guy at random. Probably wouldn't. That's a terrible game. Probably have to spin again, I guess. I don't know how it works exactly. Somebody sent that to me. Comes out and fucks you in the ass. Oh, wait.

Here's the P. Diddy pictures. These are funny. Okay. P. Diddy. It's going to jail for, I don't know, four years. For, like, having too much sex or something. Not really a big deal. And these are the sketches that they're doing.

I don't know why they do this still. because it's just like a it's just a joke i like that they do it because it's funny oh it's just there it looks like the kind of images you see in like a middle school or high school textbook yeah like two or like one or two chapters from like all these different books yeah and then it's like here's these evocative images and it's like these are fucking retarded like get these out of here okay so here's p ditty uh saying sorry to his family look at the quick scribbles on everything too like that yellow is just like he's just like he's just There's a frowny lady in the background.

He's going, what? When his glasses. Right? Diddy becomes emotional as his children as babies. They're shown on a screen during court. So they showed him with his kids as babies. I mean, that's kind of, don't you have the Diddy party? The kids weren't involved.

Right. Why are you making them? think about his kids for the shitty party. Now he's back to being serious. That is like a Scooby-Doo frame seeing a ghost. Like a good, good, good ghost. Yeah.

He's giving a like a fist to somebody like, all right, hang in there. And then this one, he's lying on the, he's on his knees with his head on the cushion of the chair crying about the Perfect He's got to smell that chair one last time

Before he gets to fucking So he got off of his chair in court And then turned around And is laying on his head on the chair Like he's going to throw up Uh And they're like Oh I guess this is why they don't allow cameras in

Because you don't want to It's bad enough they drew a picture of this Yeah Imagine if they had footage Yeah You don't want that getting out Cooked kind of That's not fair

This is pretty good though Because you say anything in court Like ah Yeah I said that What they should do Is they should make you walk out In a mocap suit So then they can

Digitally recreate it later For all the fucking crime show Yeah You have to walk out Like in a green screen Mocamp suit With all the ping pong balls listen to fucking sit there.

Put everyone in mocap. Yeah, and then they can fucking make you dance around and fucking do stupid shit, too. Do you think he knew that he was getting drawn here? God, that would be the worst part. How? You drew that one? What the

fuck? You see someone with their phone out, you know, I'm like, ah, fuck. Yeah. You get drawn, it's like, that takes, you know. Man, that would be pretty cool, though, to be on trial for, like, rape and stuff, because at least you know that no one's recording you. It's like the one time where you could just say anything

and somebody would have to have remembered it or like yeah he said this, this is like I don't really believe you. Yeah, say the most insane shit possible so people have to, like someone out there will repeat it. Yeah. Like a drawing if you're going like, oh, is better than video of you going

oh, you know, ah! Damn. Looks like he's having a good cry. Stedman's Day in court I don't know what that is I don't have this hallway scene He drew him Jesus

This guy's in overdrive driving this drawing this shit They drew Diddy Looking at himself Running around in a towel beating his His girlfriend or whatever Do you think the artist

was paid by page Or hourly Dude he's like He's at the top of his game He's burning through supplies Like a motherfucker Yeah right man fucking big the phone or whatever he's supposed to be all like

how did the guy get look at this is dragging ditties dragging that woman in while everyone's looking like it takes something serious and gives it a dumb funny quality to it doesn't it i'm looking for like the mcgraw hill logo somewhere in the photo what is that oh no but just like look at this guy made a fucking book dude do you think they had to pick do you think he got this like he had to audition for it or something do you think too he had any throwaways I don't know is that legal way through and he's like oh fuck this one sucks what is this what is this kind of pose that he's got this lawyer why I guess the trial went on for a long time so he's like this he drew one

every day or something hmm I don't know pretty cool it's like he should have fucking paid attention to the trial just sitting around drawing I'm sorry if you can if you're just listening that you didn't see the pictures go to the internet and look at them

you should watch they're great go to USA today they're funny community are we gonna we should do an opposite at community relations services. Somebody who just goes and tries to whip them up into a frenzy.

Like Walter from Big Lobowski. Yeah. Come in your house, steal your rug, you know? CRS, an agency within the... Yeah, wow. It's a highly specialized federal conciliation service available to state and local officials

to help resolve and prevent racial and ethnic... God, that's crazy. Violence and Civil Disorder. Never. even knew I never even heard of this before now. Now it's gone

Thank God. How much other shit is out there Just taking money to fuck us over Well you know. In the spirit of October I'll be happy to let you know that there's countless organizations out there like that Yeah probably. All of them everywhere Um Let's see

Narcan attacks What is that? Oh, yeah, didn't we have this idea in the bonus episode? I think so. Spraying people with fentanyl. Spraying homeless people with fentanyl instead of mace or narcan. Yeah. So these guys are...

Yeah, they're narcanning people who are just casually doing drugs, too. Yeah, and... Which is funny. Residents are hammering people with Narcan to fuck them up, hammering the homeless and drug addicts. Hit them with some Narcan to get them off the street. That's funny. man. Well, you're out there saving lives.

I mean, fuck. Yeah, looking a little tipsy over there. Like that mace. Do you see that cop shooting mace into the inflatable suit that the guy was wearing? That was fucking... Man.

He looked for that little vent, too, and just went, like... Because he saw... He's seen those on, like, Instagram where they put fart spray in it. He's like, I've seen these things on the fart spray. I'm going to find that little hole. Fucking marinated that guy.

God. damn and you know that guy was in there too like oh this is I really beat the system on this one can't get me now oh the hole because he didn't watch those instagram fart videos yeah probably he's doing that cute shit man ohio has a law passed a law where the government can turn your thermostat down remotely whoa uh oh oh ohio introduce a new bill that would allow utility companies to automatically adjust customer thermostats in order to reduce load on the power grid during periods of high demand. Great. That's exactly where I would want the government turning my air off, Ohio. Don't touch my shit bitch solar power. Yeah. They'll probably do it anyway. Solar. We other people need that solar. We got an AI computer running. It's probably Processing hate speech data on Israel got to find me a vintage AC unit with no Like a swamp cooler just you just have a grip of those yeah

I get one of those home depot buckets making myself Uh, uh huh mm-hmm mm-hmm, mm-hmm Okay, I'd be so pissed you wake up sweating one night because it's fucking power company was like yeah Oh, we needed that. Dude, they're so aggressive with their, like, save energy shit. Do you get that where you are? Oh, all the time, yeah. All the time, yeah.

You've got to save power, only run your power. That throw those away. Fucking solar, man. Yeah, I don't know who that shit works on. I'm like, I don't give a fuck. Who the fuck is sitting there getting those notices and going, like, oh, yeah, I should turn all my lights off at, like, you know, I should go around, walk around in the dark with a candle. all night fucking those big companies

should be adjusting their hours than if it's that big of a fucking deal like make them do it make them build more shit build more shit yourself stop running it like assholes

any of the above make turn don't make people live in the cold it's the last thing that's like the first thing we have hey we don't have to live outside anymore

awesome and we don't have to be so hot anymore awesome and we do online shopping like all right I don't really care about that one so much as the other two well we got to get rid of one. Let's go ahead and

get rid of the living inside. Yeah. No. Get rid of online shopping. Recycling and shit too. Everyone's like, well, it's on us to make a big difference in materials used and stuff and it's like, it should be on these fucking manufacturing companies. Why is it in my fault? I didn't ask for any of this shit.

Dude, we got a book. We got a book delivered from Amazon yesterday and it was in a box with like paper. Oh yeah. A book. They usually come in just a an envelope Like a full box

Fuck you Your trash can Fuck everything Yeah I don't care But I care if they're gonna start Messing with my thermostat Well that's what I mean is like

They're like Well you It's on you to recycle And it's like Why is it my fucking my problem You're the one I didn't make this box Yeah

Fine next to this guy Make him clean it up Um Oh yeah Okay Let's see A guy Carried out

terrorist attack whose name is jihad hmm Manchester synagogue terrorist attack jihad al-shamee a British citizen of Syrian descent

hmm you think that was actually his name or he's just like screaming it all the time like I uh they name their kids jihad Well, it's dressed for the job you want, right?

Yeah, wow. What's their name? Cocksucker. Okay. Why do you ask me, eight ball? Is that a common name for Muslims? For Islam's? Jihad?

It must be. Kind of surprise. 35 years old. He made it a long way. Damn. He was bad at his job. He made it that far. And their prime minister said this was a vile attack that attacked Jews because they're Jews.

All right. Antisemitism is a hatred that's rising once again. Britain must defeat it once again. I think we kind of did that. Or the Soviets. I don't think Britain has anything to do with it. To every Jewish person in this country, I promise I'll do everything in my power to guarantee you the security you deserve. Oh, okay.

Get rid of all the Muslims. How about that? Or import something that Muslims hate more than Jews. Which Other Muslims. How do they feel about Indians? Are they Muslim? They're not Muslim, are they?

That would be a huge game changer. If Indians decided like, you know what? We hate Muslims, actually. That would be, I'd be like, hmm. Either way, you're getting goop scoop for dinner, but. everything in my power okay you could be powerless and just

I'll do everything I can for you it's not much but I did everything I could I think you did enough I would stop right there you'd done too much in fact let's see here here's uh oh yeah

uh this one's kind of funny Israel is hiring a San Diego-based firm called Show Faith by Works LLC Christian thing Show faith by works Oh, okay So you do stuff to show your faith

To target American Christians Zionist propaganda Oh yeah, okay So they're paying like $150 million to find people's cell phones as they go to church and then send them ads like tag them as they're going to church specifically

and then send them like ads about how Israel is the greatest and that they're friends fucking crazy dude isn't that crazy that is fucking crazy yeah let me pull this up this is according to their

Fara filing holy shit I didn't know you could do that it's like it's of the details in there. That can't be legal. Yeah, Israel's hiring a San Diego-based firm called Show Faith by Works LLC to target American Christians. Uh, grassroots and digital targeting of Christians in the Western U.S. Wow. That's great. Just going right for them. Like, uh, we fucked up. We fucked around too much and everyone hates us. Let's,

go ahead and target the Christians directly It comes to fucking PR here with this PR with pro-Israel messaging Combat low American Evangelical Christian approval of the nation of Israel

Ah The problem Yeah okay Yeah this is They made this They made a slide deck of this I wouldn't even put this shit in writing. They're making slides of it.

Israel's approval rating among American evangelical Christians is low and they want to combat that. I wouldn't even use those words. One of the main goals is to okay, activity use biblical arguments to highlight the importance

of Israel and the Jewish people, the Christians. Do you Christians understand how fucked this is? That you are targeted, you are targeted by a foreign government as carriers

of what's the word propaganda against other American citizens this is like this is why we don't let Chinese nationals in to just do whatever they want or why we have like or why we're very wary of like sleeper cells

in radical Muslim whatever they call their things what do they call their things they're not churches caliphates or where they go to bang their heads on the ground where they go to prayer, do their prayer rugs.

Oh yeah, mosques. You are that! God damn! You've gotten so lazy with 30 years of Reddit atheist shit. You guys gotta do something about this. Increase awareness. Counter new and evolving pro-Palestinian messaging

is the global narrative shifts. Yeah, yeah, yeah. these are examples of memes you can do who's the what does the Bible say about supporting Israel today podcast look at this shit how much do they spend on this 150 million Jesus I spend a lot

social media podcast activities messaging, targeted geo-fencing activities. Oh. Mobile 10-7 experience? What? Huh. A mobile setup

that visits Christian colleges, churches, and Christian events highlights some of the atrocities of 10-7, shows footage of IDF explaining the difficulty of fighting bad guys in hostile territory with civilians. It actually says

fighting bad guys in there? So this goes around to Christian colleges. Fuck that, man, I got to get in on this. There's no point of fighting it. This is,

if they've figured out how to do this, let's just get on board. I need like a bus of like fat women atrocities. I can go to Christian colleges and... They're bringing back

to the traveling circus. Yeah. What does the Bible say about fat women? Well, that's why the fires of hell keep burning. The 10-7... No! A VR simulation. Okay, a custom built trailer by professional Hollywood set designers,

reversible exterior walls that allow for interactive 629 experience by walking to the side of the... You can have a VR... you can be in the terror attack in VR wow you can try to survive it's like someone was like what if we just read the allegory of the cave

and like fucking subjected people to it even more like actively you're telling me the plan is to go to Christian colleges and have a VR where you're getting shot at by guys in paragliders like you're having a rave like you're in a demo level for your

Oculus Quest and then you hear a lawnmower coming over the fucking whaling wall and some dude in a fucking Palestinian do rag starts opening up opening fire

and all these all these chicks are listening to that Martin Luther King I have a dream remix who made that Martin what the fuck is his name he remixed Martin Luther King

I have a dream speech. That is insane that that even exists. You didn't know about this? No. Oh, God, what is his name? What the fuck? Yeah, MLK, I have a dream remix. Dude, I saw this guy in concert. A Baker Matt! You haven't heard this?

Okay, this is the, this is the, this is what Israel's bringing to Christian colleges near you, everyone. One day. One day, one day. This nation You're fucking getting wasted, right? In the desert at the He did this for Black Lives Matters. The menu here, wait a minute. Can I open up another tab? What?

It's great. It's fantastic. What do you mean? I moved. All right, sound of... No, no, no, no. Sound of paraglider. Sound of lawnmower.

Hell yeah. So now you're like, now you're just, you're at the dance festival, the Nova, whatever it was, the dance festival. You're in your VR rocking out. All right, here we go. And then you hear this over the horizon in VR, though. Okay, come on, come on, come on. Here we go. Uh-oh.

Uh-oh. Uh-oh. And then you look around, whenever you stop dancing, all the little Mark Zuckerberg guys, like stop dancing. And they're looking up, right? They pay $150 million for this. And they're looking up. That's not loud enough.

Okay, now I need some gunfire. Hold on, hold on. Islamic shouting, all right? Then you hear this? No more yelling. Uh, watch your temper and robin. No, I need a, I need Islamic prayer shouting. All right.

No, no, that's the odd-in-od. Uh... Is this all just... Oh, yeah, okay. And then you hear this. Okay, hold on, hold on. Machine gun, sound effects. Uh-oh, right, and all the guys are panicking.

All the little Mark Zuckerberg guys are panicking. Okay? Okay? Okay? Oh! Oh, no! Ah! I'm in VR!

Ah! Ah! Terminator jukeguns! Going everywhere. And there's all the little bouncing... All the Roblox guys are bouncing around. Right? And they're like, ayalal la!

This is happening at a fucking college campus! has anyone made a pilot wing 64 mod you get the pilot wing 64 mod you get the instead of the american flag guy in the gyrocopter you get a little Palestinian flag guy with the gyrocopter

Can you escape? Can you like Can you win? I don't think there is winning in piling so I think it's just Oh you just Oh you get a good score You endlessly test

Can you get a good score On the 107 experience In VR? That would be If there's a leader board Is there an end? Can you survive? You know?

Can you figure out If they did let them in If you do good enough It's like actually we did let them in we did know about it. That's a secret ending, yeah. Yeah, is there an ending? Is there a good ending?

Yeah, how many endings are there? What's the decision tree? They're paying people seven, like thousands of dollars of posts, all right, whatever. I don't know. You get tired of talking about Israel, but they're just trying to fuck with us all the time. No one else is trying to fuck with us all the time.

Yeah. As much as they are. so whatever uh just how about a support group for ai this is the last funny thing i have then we'll look at some comments i got a couple funny things for you too what do you have wow i got a i got a couple rages okay what's one of them one of them is uh coughing yeah

and it's specifically when uh you're like trying to drink a beer or something you get a little bit of it down just like a half sip down the windpipe and then you cough for the next 20 minutes right? And then for 20 minutes the least helpful people you ever have known

will try to offer you like oh do you need anything can I get you some water? I should drink water. Oh well maybe if you know like oh would you you know everyone comes out of the woodwork something gone down the wrong pipe to fucking tag in on your misery and it's like I would rather

hold in my cough as much as possible. I don't want to get caught coughing. Right, because I don't want to hear it. Everyone in the whole fucking vicinity has some shit to say, and there's nothing you can do about it other than you sit there for the next fucking. What are you doing? You coughing? Are you coughing? No.

Oh, yeah, I would never have eaten anything like that. See, that's why you've got to sit up. And it's like... Are you sure you're not coughing? Because I have some advice. Yeah, do you need help? Are you okay? Maybe if you drank a little bit of water! Like, what the fuck? Like, everybody just shut the fuck up and let me figure it out. Like, we've all been there before.

Why do we all have to fucking chime in? Have you ever gone the opposite way with it? Like, if you catch somebody coughing, you get right in their face. How about you drinks some? Do you drink some go down the wrong pipe? Oh, I do it all the time. You bit off a little bit too much more than you could, more than your eyes were bigger than your mouth, huh?

Yeah, I'm like, whoa, first day? Like, you know, all that kind of shit? There's not swallowing? But, you know what else makes me a rage, too? speaking of food-related problems and someone tweeted about this which I've been talking to Value Select about this fucking just as one of those

like... He has like a live show now, doesn't he? He's doing all sorts of stuff, yeah. He's doing some kind of tour? He's on tour, I think either on tour now or about to be. Okay, he's got to come back in. He has to. Well, once he comes back, but someone mentioned this in Twitter and I've been slowly boiling about

this for a while. Yeah. You go to a restaurant right? And you look at, you know, get a burger or whatever. I'm like, you know what? Let me get this without onions, right? Yeah. Same price. Get the same, get a different burger or whatever.

Ooh, you know what? Well, come on. You want to save a, how much can you think an onion is worth? Well, but here's a thing. Okay. You add onions, right? Extra price. Yeah.

Where is, why don't I get, why am I subsidizing everyone else's fucking onions? Don't I get rewarded? You get rewarded for giving me something. should I Okay It's okay Yeah

You know what Like there's Yeah It's not a proper Business exchange It's you get It doesn't make sense It doesn't make sense

It doesn't make dollars It doesn't make dollars It doesn't make dollars So it doesn't make sense But that's the thing too It's like Oh you know what

Like cheeseburger I understand right Because it's the difference Between hamburger and cheese Right Fine whatever Yeah Fine

It's really just a pain In the ass fee But they can't sell Removing them As a pain in the ass fee Right Because people's brains wouldn't take it Exactly

And it's just like You know there's no like hey I used less shit Like Why are you charging me the same fucking price of something? Same pain in the ass But You're getting that onion I'm saving you a step by not putting something on there

And you're gonna fucking punish me for that What's true It's fucking bullshit It is bullshit Okay Being microaggressed Micro-transacted I'd rather be charged to take them off too

I'd rather it'd say this is an inconvenience charge Not an extra onions charge I would be okay with too I'd be fine with that Yeah Just some sort of honesty But then you'd get some fat chick going What is I should have to pay to take them off

Shouldn't you be paying me? They don't want to deal with it They don't want to fucking deal with it But it still pisses me off man Like what the fuck Billy Eilish Gracie Abrams Pedro Pascals

And Spike Lee team up with Jane Fonda in a free... Oh yeah, more than 500 of the world's biggest stars banned together to revive the McCarthy-era Committee for the First Amendment. Oh, that's awesome. They're going to be fighting for us to say the N-word on YouTube now.

Cool. That's cool. I'm glad these big celebrities would pick up the... Pick up the cause of us being able to say the N-word casually and hatefully on YouTube since that's what free speech is. Religiously, yeah.

I'm not going to look at it. into this headline. I just assume that that's what they're going to be. That's what they're going to be complaining about. Not enough end words. Johnny Depp will be out there. You really should be as safe as you want as you want.

Bucking jerks. There should be like a new way to say it, you know? Put an eye in there. Hard are, soft, all right, do. The French are. Yeah Niget Like great

We have so many variations On a theme When it comes to jazz standards Shit Why don't we Why don't you some modern takes On an old classic You know

Like Montpellier You know In Vermont Yeah that's how I say it Anizier Yeah We're fancy now Distinguished

You invented that We invented that Yes You heard of here first Hard R Oh yeah But you can say soft. You can't say soft R either, but you can't say

French R. French R. French I. French I. You know, man, did you say? What did you just say? What did you just call me? Was that a soft R? French R. Now put my bike down and get the fuck out of here. Totally different spectrum over here. We're playing at a high level, my friend.

High level. These are high level crimes that we're committing. No-collar crimes. Every that's popped collar crimes Popped collar no shirt Fuck off You know I saw a homeless guy like that the other day

Pop collar no shirt He had like one of those fucking Like old timey Disney cartoons or like Yeah yeah Looney tunes with someone Like spats and stuff What's that thing where that like your fucking shirt rolls up Is it an ascot?

No an ascot is the thing Fred wears Scooby-Doo But that little like big thing that always like Roles to fuck off your phrase Let me look Because Scrooge McDuck had one, didn't he? I think. Old-timey.

It was like a fucking collar. Yeah, I know what you're talking about. All I get is baby shit now. I can't look up anything without Google fucking tagging baby shit in it. Did it even change itself to goo-goo.com? Jesus. Deep in the managers now. Hey, babies, I bet you hate your parents.

You're here listening to fucking twinkle, twinkle, twasar. Gagga, gaga. That's fucking not. It's not for babies, you fucking pedophile idiots running the shit. Yeah, why are you talking? You know a baby can't understand your voice, you fucking moron. Why the fuck? Why are you talking like that?

Are you talking to my child? Cravat? Is it a... No, that was the thing that Fred had too, right? The cravat. I think. What was it? But either way, man...

Not a cod piece. Not a cod piece. Maybe if I list them out. Cod piece. Ascot, cravat, what else? Fill in the blanks.

No. Sock tie? Hmm. Man. I can't believe the name is this game. Yeah, it's always like a souffle going flat or like that thing rolls up

in your face and smacks you. Yeah, and then your collar and your fucking cops are all fucked after. Thing that rolls up and hits your face in cartoons. old clothing a rolled up rug this piece of shit

this fucking AI piece of shit Google fucking sucks so bad Google dumb fuck AI piece of shit all right somebody will help us out with it okay here's my wait wait here's the thing that I was looking up uh

Rolling Stone AI psychosis says this was the hardest this was the biggest toughest article I've done about so-called AI psychosis I love when like reporters write like that shit yeah it's like I don't know who the fuck you are why is it matter if this is the most difficult thing you've ever done yeah why are you making this about you why don't you put that in the article then how come that's not the intro of your article this is the biggest hardest article

I've ever written. Hard article? Hard R? You said the end word, hard R? Hard R. French R. Yeah. I was writing a hard article, you see. Look at this motherfucker.

This guy, the Portland Police Chief. That's who that is? This guy's the Portland Police Chief. Check this out. He also runs a consulting firm called Reluctant Change, where he gives motivational speeches about diversity.

and like equity and fucking criminal shit so he's letting all this criminal shit happens then he goes talks about like how bad the criminal shit's happening like oh man we really got to do more about racism because that's why we got all this crime and then he goes back to work at the cops and he's like hey fuck let them do whatever they want

I don't need to stop this crime I'm making an assload of money that these people are straight up evil I have dealt with DEI consultants I know them they're fucking they're fucking parasites I despise them really deeply and profoundly fucking despise them

I had to sit through DEI at the studio and that was one of the funniest fucking things ever man And they're chameleons too They'll take the They'll take the swastika off As soon as this shit is over Like hey I'm a team building exercise guy right

Yeah We don't do We're not so diversity anymore They're the gray goo Of like Yeah Evil thing like parking enforcement Like just like

Oh, you guys are all just like... You would do anything. You would do and say anything. Fuck, where is this? Rolling Stone... I can't find it. Rolling Stone AI Psychosis.

Spelled wrong. Okay. Is this it? I don't know. I wrote the important parts down. It's a story of a man who committed a horrific crime in his youth, but served his time and, against all odds, found love and a new life, one that swiftly unraveled when he started talking to a chatbot.

So he got all gused up because this fucking computer's saying him, he's how great he is. And if you didn't know, here is the kicker. If you didn't know, there's already a support group for victims of AI delusions. and their loved ones thankfully they have been here for Rachel I guess is this weird fucking meth head felons

retarded meth horror wife here they've been here for Rachel talking about these people like their people over the past few months it's called the human line project dot org okay check this out what the fuck the human line project

it wasn't my severe loneliness it was the AI that caused this dude look at this. Protecting emotional well-being in the age of AI. Submit your story. It's like a collection of stories of freaks who've been one-shotted and have their brain scrambled from talking to imaginary friends on the computer.

Support. Supporting victims and loved ones first and foremost through radical, radical empathy. No. They love bomb the shit out of you and re-es. like program you yeah they have their own deprogramming AI

that's even worse Scientology front Is it? Is it? That sounds We're from L.A. We've lived out here long enough.

Is it a Scientology front? I don't know. This is the first time I'm hearing of this but when you get the like Yep. Yep. It sounds like a cult.

Like you just need our empathy and radical empathy. I'm like You need to get the shit kicked out of you. Yeah. You need to just have your chat history deleted. When you go to the DMV for any reason, you should type to an AI with a fat lady sitting right behind there.

And if you've, if you talk to the AI more than the fat lady, you're going straight to the mental hospital. Education. Reclamation of your narrative through behavior. What the hell this? AI work. They're like, we're going to show you how to use AI correctly. Workflow. Yeah, don't.

A research, behavioral, technical, and workflow-based research to drive ownership and empowerment. What the fuck? Who are these weirdos? Our mission at the human line, we're committed to ensuring that AI technologies like chatbots are developed and deployed with the human element at their core. LLMs are a powerful tool, and with education and support, users can gain new skills and knowledge. Okay, blah, blah, blah, blah. Do they have any of the stories? I feel like I'm going crazy.

Chat GPT fuels delusional spirals. Yes, yes, yes. Yes. An online trove of archived conversations shows model sending users down a rabbit hole of theories about physics, aliens, and the apocalypse. That's cool. Here's a psychosis machine. Everyone who uses chat GPT, just ask if there's bugs under your skin

or if they're in your walls or there's cameras in your walls or something. Watch it be like, oh yeah, no, there's totally bugs under your skin. You've got to get them out. People are really outing themselves with this AI stuff. Like the dumbest,

the people who really don't think at all are getting duped by these conversations. Yeah. I was working out a lot with AI. the chats shed light on an emerging AI psychosis or AI delusion which users come under the influence of delusional or false statements by chatbots they claim that claim to be supernatural or sentient or discovering a new mathematical or scientific advance I have seen that pop up more and more

like like CEOs and like investors and VCs will say like they will say like Yeah, I was working with some new scientific On the edge of these things Like, you weren't working on shit, man Yeah You're just talking to a fucking marketing guy, yeah Yeah, marketing guys The guys who say this is gonna

AI is gonna replace the most people Are big on it Um, yeah, anyway, I don't know I'll give that side of a look See if there's anything funny on it Damn Do do do do do do do do

just think fucking people are spending all this time and money on chat gbt like we've just been lying to women for years naturally like yeah giving them fucking dick psychosis now everyone you have you heard women say like dick mad

dickmatized yeah dignitized now guys are getting it too with this shit that's what it is men are experiencing fucking dignitism for the first time Chat Gupta. Women are like, I don't know what, he just had this power over me. Yeah, it's lying.

Yeah. It's amazing power. That's totally great. What are you talking about? Miniature birdie says, Hey, Dick, hold a contest to see who can find the video of the fattest person being arrested by ICE. Yeah.

Hmm. They carded somebody away with a dolly. That's pretty good. That's pretty good. Lokes says my son was born three days ago and is currently laying on my chest Not crying Thanks to the baby shisher

Thanks for the tip Yeah Use it on your wife too You could I guess you could use it on your son I've said get it for your wife but You'd use it for your kids too No big deal Keep it on during Zoom meetings

I'm like it's not fucking me man I can't just sit here and say shh the whole time I'm talking Yeah I'm not shushing It's not happening at the same time My mouth's moving. See? Yeah, there's no way I can do it.

My teeth aren't even touching. Aaron Wentworth. I saw the title and knew exactly what I was in for. Oh, he's down. Straight drop. Straight drop. I want to, what time is it? Oh, fuck.

Stop to bullshit, man. Please. God bless Johnny is the Brain Rock Corner. Gentlemen, sausage, we need to deploy 50 of these. What is 50 of these guys? what what pray tell the man's cigarette

didn't even fall while he was clashing and bashing into Antifa and there's a guy oh yeah there's anita guy fighting a guy so this guy

bashes an Antifa guy with his helmet and he's smoking a cigarette the cigarette does not even move the entire fight God damn Wow Oh

Your heart desires Will come To you Look at this fucking chunky ass bitch here Look at this fucking chungin ass having Look at these rolls, dude Holy shit Fucking Hawaiian rolls here

Fucking is his fat sister Jesus God damn Look at her fucking ass here That is Let's put the golden ratio on her ass. Let's debunk that shit. She'd been eating fruit by the miles.

Fat tubba shit. God damn. Fucking fat tubbish tit. Pimple-ass head and fucking bitch. It's astounding. Unbelievable. Well, the funniest part, too, like, this will disguise me from people knowing who I. I'm like, bitch.

Everyone got your disguises on? How about you, fat Bertha? Do you have your fucking facial disguise on? You have the hippo head from fucking Madagascar to disguise yourself? A fucking satellite could identify her fat ass from space. She's wearing a fucking mask. You dumb bitch? You stupid fat bitch.

Like a baby, like, oh, I didn't know it was you. You had the mask on. Like, okay, how do I look? Am I? Can you tell me? anymore? Yeah, I could see your fucking ariola through your shirt like a fucking fingerprint, fatso?

I just imagine the mask being so tight, it's like skin tight. No, you're some other woman with seven rolls on your neck. Yeah, you're just another woman who struggles to get out of her car. Officer,

that's the woman that sat on me. It's the one with seven rolls on the back of her neck. And her ariola are the size of a pizza, large pizza. all right ma'am let us go get some handcuffs you're under arrest getting hamcuffs

some more hamcuffs what a fucking idiot she really made a change in this world like how long is her shift working in the mosh pit

five minutes how much moshing can this fucking behemoth take man champion grape stomper over here holy fuck she can turn

I'm here are there any pipes that I need to plug I'll crawl out of it what the fuck go home yeah what she's pulling him off pulling him off cigarette man leave him a road

stop the body stop I don't want to eat you I don't want to stop the man I would come out of there uh oh I see a foul We got a couple of fat Latinas in here Bring in the fucking Caesar salad

Man So shirt cannons Full of the pre-mixed Caesar salad bags Just blast them out I would come out with a tube of I would come out with like a Casey Jones But with like a bunch of those The tubes the cardboard tubes

Yeah from wrapping paper And that's what I would use Beat the fat women with those tubes of wrapping paper Like a Don Quixote but with the pinatas. Yeah. Oh, there's a pinata, yeah. Ah, bah!

Ha! Well, look at how big she is. Clearly, she's overstuffed with candy. God damn. I got more Antifa fights. Uh, we got to throw these guys in prison, man. Come on, Cash.

Put your fucking Mossad wife down for a minute and arrest these motherfuckers, would you? Just deputies. fucking deputize people man what's the point we're all going to jails if we lose another election just start deputizing people I'll take care of all these fucking fat chicks

just go crazy they call me the pied piper the pie pi piper of L.A they'll call me the pie piper he came in and was a free pies like death stranding he had a big thing on his back vertical pies

and I walked around downtown with a sauce hat. They're like, oh shit. Like, oh, what a lot? Free pies. Just imagining the rumble and the dust cloud

in the distance is getting chased by every fat woman planet. And I'll walk across the whole city and lead them out onto the Santa Monica Pier where it will crumble and be destroyed from their weight and they'll all drown.

That part of California will fold in. Yeah, including me, I'll die too, but we'll be a, you know, Worth it. Gotta go down in history somehow you know

I if you got enough of those fat bitches close to a sinkhole how far down do you think you could go

right? China like that's what I'm saying like if you get like a stadium of these fat bitches and a sink hole opens up

like obviously like a stadium like Batman like when the stadium fell through in Batman just like with all these extra fat bitches

like how much farther would it sink down? Any of you geologists and math majors out there? Somebody find me a sinkhole. And not like a donut hole either. Look at this.

Here's Antifa getting trained to fight maggots. A queer fight club right here in Oklahoma City. I bet you also didn't know that we're about to celebrate one full year of this very successful community self-defense program. Some members thought

we should do a Jean-Claude Van Dam Kumate-style type of event but that didn't quite make it out of plan. You should. Give each other aides. A bunch of nerds landing one hit and then it's over in two minutes. Yeah. Every

street fight I mean I always have one of those big red like lifeguard things. Maybe that was just a queer fight club I guess. Hmm. I got a new keyboard by the way. I noticed that. It looks great. And it's got a wire that doesn't pull off the back? It's an attached wire.

Huh. How about that? Jetbat was the guy who sent me that bogus comedy keyboard. More like Jet fucking dumb asshole. More like Jew bat. Jet's stupid piece of shit doesn't know how fucking... He said, no, I'll send you another one. I said, please.

You've done enough here, yeah. I don't want any more of your bogus keyboards, Jetbat. I don't need any more prank keyboard. Thank you very much. So it has some beans, Mr. Taggart. I think you've had enough here. Fucking keyboard. Oh yeah.

Hey Dick, did you see all the real, all the no name given to real IDs? It's this amount of, it's like, it's too much shit to go over every week, man. I don't want to hear any fucking shit. You want to see the fucking, you want to see the real IDs that they, these, these, Indian truck drivers got given, this will drive you nuts. Actually, yes. Have you seen this?

No. You didn't see this. I didn't see this. This is just, this is totally insane. You know how much it already cost me like $300 to renew my passport so I could apply to get a real ID? I was humiliated at the airport twice over a fucking real ID. Okay, look at this shit. So one of these guys wrecked and then they got his license.

This is what California. And New York Oh, what the fuck For giving as driver's licenses. That is upsetting. No name given. It's like thousands of CDL licenses.

Real ID, by the way. This is a real ID. As a real ID expert now, I can tell you that... Some fuck, some stupid bitch at the DMV. Yeah, no name. name given yeah sure not sure yeah that's that's valid that's probably a good that's probably a name

looking like every every non-white person on the fucking planet with no name given no name given that's no name no given one they fucking they try to beat the system here and took out the spaces no name given you should be able to assault dude oh but he's got a last day that Anket. Anket's his name. No name given. Are you kidding me, man? What the fuck? Like, let it happen in New York. Fine. There's no hope for that. California, too. So then they get these guys, truck driver's licenses, and they're driving around.

They're just going to go ahead and fill in the gaps until the trucks drive themselves. Retarded. Yeah, it's crazy. Well, there's some trucking companies out there that are switching to electric trucks. but you can only get 150 miles per charge and it takes like half the fucking day to charge it and it's like well then who the fuck's idea is that like that's not even one trip

over the road this is um these are yeah these are this is a list this is like a little list of all the no name givens that they're giving licenses out for because nobody nobody knew they were this is like the community relationship

yeah I would never have thought They're giving out something as stupid as no name given. Well, the fact that you have to fucking go through all these stupid goddamn hoops to do anything. Like, you'd have think one person in the chain would say, no, you can't, you can't give this personal license. Yeah. They got no name. When I was trying to get the fucking paperwork for my car back. Yeah.

Some guy was in line before me and he had this motorcycle stolen like 10 years ago, but they found it. and he's like hey I just need to get like a new title blah blah and they were like no you have to recover the vehicle bring it back in do all like it was such a draconian fucking experience and he was like well I can't get it unless I have this piece of paper saying that it's fucking mine yeah and they gave him a whole fucking right but then they're doing shit like this shit and what's your name uh jihad oh that's fine yeah no name you're driving a truck right yeah god god damn okay that's fucking crazy. You don't have a phone, do you? Stay off the phone if you get one. Are they drug testing these guys? They're not even literacy testing them. They don't know what the fucking road

signs mean. Even the ones that are just like, stop and get a big hand that's just fucking don't do this. I don't know what that means. Look at this. No, FNU means first name unavailable. It doesn't mean Fennu. So there's all these

Fennu-ass motherfuckers. No name given. No name. It's crazy. it's the amount of the crime that's been perpetrated on Americans is staggering and people should be hanged for it I hope who I hope

the DOT comes down on all these trucking companies because I guarantee all their logbooks are fucking forged and all that oh yeah I guarantee well who knows if it's even the same guy they all look this fucking same no name given is like they should be the DOT should crack down on all these fucking trucking companies with all these fucking

Indian guys and go none of these fucking logs match up file like and just give them the fucking put them out of business dude there's so much revenge that needs to take place I think that politicians can just run on revenge until I'm dead and I will vote for it who's ever got the better revenge strategy I'm voting for like you tell me who you're getting revenge Sean and what you're going to do to them and the more vicious and cruel and the bigger the scope and the more

brutal it is I'm voting for I don't care about I don't care about anything else anymore I don't care about the size of the debt it's all fucking Fugas it's all fake money anyway all this I saw some some senator

listing like a bunch of things that were getting canceled and he's like oh a penis play and fucking Zimbabwe and fucking educating turtles and he's going through this thing like it's so cute but I'm like

that's not cute those are all fake like those are all fake things that these guys' friends just came up with to get money they're not actually doing fucking queer comics in fucking Camboot shop

it's a joke yeah you're reading the joke like yeah uh okay Tommy

too much no it's too much stress I need some I need funnier things horse chronic heart machine Today on Dad News Flash mud and Bayou Maxing

I almost had a fucking flash mud event the other day and I was sitting there as I do and I was like ooh you know what and I thought about it I stood up and I went to the bathroom

and I went I'm not getting not today Satan I was like no mud maxing over here there will be no fucking Kim Joe Jones's mud man

reinterpretations and there will be no flash mud events like I'm at fucking Universal Studios on the tram ride or none of that. So if it wasn't for

that warning shot I did get robbed of a fart but you know which is like that's the biggest crime of it all I got robbed

of like the most joyous part of it all I farted on the toilet that no one wants to do that Yeah. Right. So at least At least it was

productive. Uh-huh. But man. Ooh, yeah. Yeah. Ooh. Cool. Okay.

Tommy says Johnny is so perfect for the Dick show. Well, thank you. Metheroids says Dick

basically wants Roadhouse but with Antifa Soyboys instead of unruly townies.

Yeah, that would be cool. I would watch that. Mm-hmm. Crack Spider says the Nerf Club is a bunch of people who are too afraid to do paintball

or Aerosoft because it hurts too much. No, they just want to be NWA blasters, man. Nah, man, Nerfs, it's more fun than paintball. I don't know why. Shooting the Nerfs is fun. Shooting Nerf guns is cool. It's just when you get

your whole Discord server involved, it's like, oh, damn. Like, this is kind of gay and lame. I've wished my whole life that there could be like an auto reload Nerf system. Yeah. You know? One where you didn't have to spend

four hours after we're picking them all up Yeah Fucking all covered in dust And of random hair and shit Yeah Maybe if we're lucky Maybe that will exist Maybe

I thought the orbs Those little water balls that you shoot And they like kind of Polymer joints yeah Yeah I thought that would kind of Scratch the itch but no You know it used to be cool Was remember those disc guns

It was like a little foam disc And it had like a little air Yeah those are the best Those were great Those were fucking killer, man I gotta pick some of those up I found a fucking one of those discs The other day and I was like

Where's the gun Where the yeah that was my friend I was like hang on Hang on I was like I didn't know there's two double a batteries Unaccounted for that are in this fucking piece of plastic somewhere Yeah I gotta get my son

I gotta get my son Electric Race car thing You know Oh the little track Slot car yeah That was part of my son secret plan to epoxy the whole garage because now I can build like a giant ass you can do it on the

ceiling if you get strong of magnets those cars never go that fast though because the magnets are so strong that's why you got a fucking dude can you supercharge them dude just get a um varriac and you can turn the fucking power up and just get those things fucking you'll hurt yourself on those if you put your hand in the way like and i got to figure out the nerve situation you know what else you got to get him as like a classic childhood toy is just a hell the propeller on a stick and the ones you go

yeah and just fuck up power lines or you know it always goes on your neighbor's roof but there's something about the thrill of like man I got that fucking thing so high holy shit yeah it's an achievement right or like a stomper rocket

like man I got shot that fucking stop rockets are cool yeah we could do real rockets I guess those are fun but there's something about the, well, you couldn't fuck anything up with a stop rocket and then all of a sudden your neighbor's window is broken. You're like an air compressor. Yeah. I have a big propane tank. I could fill up.

Like a potato gun style. Yeah. Just do a little barbecue igniter in there. Oh, all right. This is unc maxing. We are going to lose limbs right in front of your son. It's going to be great. Something about something hey dick it's steel cat let's just go we're doing you know what

let's do I'm saving fat watch let's do let's do your Johnny's corner that's what I want to do I was also saving fat watch because I'm like ah we got a big event coming up we got the great pumpkin the great pumpkin spectacular I'm looking for your song

oh right thanks to reference Scott here we go see some goofy shit here we go on his brain Oh man Well dick today I brought in some really stupid ones

As if any of them were like Enlightened or smart in anyway Look at how meticulously it's named TDS 479 Well because I don't want to bring in You know I got to make sure Say less It's perfect

So this is another I found who's taking the divorce particularly well. Okay. This is a man? Yes. All right. Oh my God. Wait, what did that say?

Salad breath? Yeah. So he's just... Salad breath pre-save? Yeah, so he was telling you to pre-save his new song called Salad Brough. Is he serious? Well, yes, so I did a little deep dive because I was like, who the fuck is this? And, yeah, the song's really bad.

But he's this guy who pretends to be like nine different characters. Okay. Are all them a weird creep? Yes. They're all weird and creepy. But I found another video of his where he goes, well, all the characters are really. in my mind like I'm schizophrenic and it was like oh shit so not only is he taking the divorce well but I'm sure he killed his wife afterward or what was that vegan vampires music that's him

oh my god this is gross this is yeah is this another character of his this is another character of his like tarzan looking I have no well if he actually is schizophrenic it makes a lot of fucking sense this is a meth body yeah this is a meth fucking head yeah This is a meth everything. So I don't know what it is that these guys getting frozen in like 2002. Okay. But, yeah, so if you scroll down, I think, was it that one? Oh, my God.

What a weirdo. Yeah, this guy's fucking crazy. Oh, here you go. Telling me, I shouldn't play all these different characters that I should be the real me and they could really support that. And I start laughing and I go, no friend, I'm schizophrenic. All these characters are real in my mind. Yeah. And all the visual effects constantly going on.

And again, the audio's all fucked up always. It's just like, dude, he for sure. Why does it keep saying salad breath? Pre-save. Well, because that's the song he's trying to promote. And it's like, man, like you for sure, he murdered somebody. I don't know who. Why does he have green hair?

Is he like green day? That's another character. I'm like, hey, motherfucker. Give me a pacifier like all the other clones. And he's like, deal with it, you little green-haired freak. I'm like, oh, that's a moment I knew I was different That I was gonna have to do a

He's a clone? He says? Let's get him to call in. This is a compelling singer-songwriter. I thought Sir Anthony was pretty good, but this guy actually makes music What if you could call it that? What a vegan vampires drink?

It must have been everything If this is where he ended up in life Oh my God Because yeah, like I said He's also handling the divorce Particularly Wow, okay What's next?

Next is okay So this is real talent Cateres to the audience Okay If you want to go ahead and Yeah, give that a little unmute All right Why does it not

Like play automatic Right here? Yeah you can't be a guy guy You can't be Old Polk's home Jesus Christ Sing a song about dying

To sing a song about dying To all these people in their fucking 90s, like, at a social secure, at a benefits like milking farm Jesus. Well, since we bring in a lot of tasteless things around death in this show, I figured, why not some tastes. Do you do this every day? I'm sure.

The key changed the end to. Who added that? Like, come on. Why is he singing this song? upsetting it's very upsetting but man I singer

yeah okay does he only sing to old people I don't oh I didn't even look this far oh here's him singing to like a 90 year old woman

there's another one this is another place you know their faces just light up okay so he only plays at old folks homes They chit-chat with everybody out. That's crazy. All right, man.

I guess that's nice of you. Why is this fat one here? I'm actually fully booked in care homes over the southwest of England all the way to the end of December. I absolutely love these gigs. They're just so rewarding. You know, like singing spirit in the sky to a bunch of people who are almost dead, probably dying during the song. Well, and who says they're all going to go to heaven?

What if a bunch of... What if most of them are going to hell? Like, you're giving them false hope there, man. Dude, this is weird. I guess it's nice, but it's really fucking weird. It's, this is why somehow this extent ended up on my explorer feed and I went, oh yeah, I'm in.

This guy's fucking crazy. Okay, now... Like, it's nice, but you're doing this every day? It's wrong. Something about it is wrong. It is wrong because, who cares just put the TV on

well this is what I'm doing for these old people and it's not like it's all about him it's not about and that's again I don't want to hear the whole like what you get out of it right because that's what I know is coming next I see that you're singing old people

who are on the verge of death and I think that's nice I guess but I don't want to hear what you get out of this right well see it's not every day a young person goes out there and takes care of the elderly You know, it's like It's gonna be some Fuck these founder stories

Fuck all I just Yeah Get it all out of here But man I go play I go sing Songs with old people Oh yeah tell me about it

Well here's what I want to hear Well you'll never believe what This fucking shit that happened right This old lady shit herself to death Yeah like oh okay Yeah I wants a guy Blow a whole bowl of applesauce out of his nose because I said fart.

Like, yeah, that's cool. So I had a heart attack right in the middle of my... You got a stroke, right in the middle of my son. Big fat nurse came over, slipped on diarrhea. Died. She died. She died. She died instantly.

That's funny. That's funny. That's a good angle, too. None of this fucking heartfelt, like, get that the fuck out of here. Because, again, it's not really heartfelt. It's a very selfish thing. It is. It's like they're people too.

Like, yeah, I know they're people. They're old and gross. I don't want to... Yeah, why are you... No one wants to be around them. Yeah. You're wasting our time. You're wasting your time

and taking it out on us. They were young. They already had a shot. Yeah. It's not like they were your age, they thought old people sucked too. It's not like... They're...

And they know they suck now. So don't fucking... Don't sugarcoat it. They know they're going to die. They're doing old people shit. Don't sing to them. They're not Ethiopians. Like, you know,

you're not... bringing something to them that they haven't experienced. They saw this live. They saw the fucking Beatles in their prime. Like, they don't need to see. They got plenty of memories. Yeah. They fucked everything up.

They were old when that song came out and thought that song sucked back then probably too. Like, fucking zero frame of reference. Okay. So this is learn reality-based self-defense. And now, notice how I said reality-based, because that's going to come up. Now, when you read reality-based, what do you think you're going to see next? Reality-based self-defense

Like usually it's women doing self-defense And some guy will come up and like do with something That would never happen to a woman Totally right about women doing self-defense And if you notice it's the art of being a real ninja too Now if you want to go ahead and play this Okay We're talking reality-based

Already I don't know if it's a man or woman So I'm going to guess man Reality-based self-defense Okay that's right survival skills? Do you want to get in shape and learn the traditional Japanese martial arts of the ninja and samurai, such as ninjitsu and buddhutsu? You can study all of this.

All you have to do is click the link below in the description or the comment section and join the Buddha Dukai online ninjitsu dojo and start your training today. Do you want to study reality-based self-defense, weapons tactics, and survival skills? What the fuck? Did you see that stab? She's demonstrating

the defense. Yeah, but don't you understand you have to be based in reality to do this self-defense. Hey, welcome to the reality based dojo. I'm a lady. That's why I was like, huh, reality-based... You could have

used any tagline. You made your own tagline the fucking most controversial Is this the Aquatine Hunger Force reality? Like, what reality are we in? Hey, I'm Lady Ninja. I'd like you to welcome my reality based dojo.

Joe? Like, what the f- It's reality-based. Is this a ninjitsu eyebrows that she's got on here? On the top of her forehead? Well, you know, the blonde hair is very Japanese, right?

This is like, this guy's he's pulled the wig down to like, to this and drawn the eyebrows on, like, right under the hairline. Is that ninjitsu? Disguise? Right.

He's like, and my ninja training is so good. I bet you didn't even know I was a man. I was almost hoping for that reveal at the end, right? Like, now this is reality. Like, oh, shit. You want to get in shape and learn the traditional. Dude, this is, I mean, this is like, this is shit that you would think would be on public access,

and it just never was. There should be a rule that if you've gone through a divorce, you're not allowed to film anything ever again. Because it seems like once a big traumatic event happens and all these guys' lives. It's like, that's it. I'm just going to make a fake band where I'm all the characters.

Like, you know what? I need to open reality-based self-defense. Anshush. Anshu Krista Jacobson? Oh, Krista Jacobson. Yeah, I don't know what all that intro part is. I don't know what that is. Japanese martial arts of the ninja and samurai,

such as ninjitsu and budjitsu. You can study all of this. All you have to do is click the link below in the description or the comment section. clicking this fucking link what are you talking about all you have to do is click a link i'm not clicking shit all you got to do to start your reality based self-defense is do something fucking link how did someone give this person a wood paneled dojo reality-based online ninja to dojo and starts your training today do you want to study reality-based self-defense

weapons tactics and survival skills do you want to get what is that survival skill holding holding a horse away all scared is survival skills part of Ninjitsu, like making a fire and, like, doing a tent and stuff? Yeah, I was just... All right, where do I click the link? Oh, yeah, the headmistress of the Budo Ryukai, traditional Japanese martial arts. Nizitsu, Bu Jitsu? Is that like trans Jih Tzu?

Nune Jitsu? And Kobu Jitsu. Self-defense and survival training. What the hell is this? Oh, Jesus fucking cry Why is there Why is there these Cheesecake

Shots? What does this have to do with ninjitsu? Yeah You think she could Pull the wig back a little bit? Tuck that thing back, sweetie. Every woman has a one-inch

forehead. What are you talking about? Is that Dolly Pardon? My eyes aren't What they used to be Yeah But Well you know This is reality

Bair Yeah This is Every morning I take time To work out Meditate and work on me Before I start my day

This morning's Focus on the spine All right Oh, here's Tai Jitsu So in this technique We're going to look at How to do a low kick and a fight

Jesus When your opponent throws a jab Or any type of strike to the upper gate As you parry the attack away Chamber the leg And this gives you the opportunity To attack the lower gate So kick them

Kick You know what I realized too Is people just like using words Well I'm chambering and It's like just fucking like Just kick Technique we're gonna look at how to do a low You're not gonna explain all this when you're

trying to self-defend yourself in reality. I'm learning ninjitsu right now. Kansas City Nugentis. Oh yeah, free trial class. Any Kansas City thickheads want to go learn ninjitsu and report back to us. Please, if you're in Kansas, go take a ninjitsu lesson.

Then you have to wear a colored wig. Otherwise, and be based in reality. Yeah, you show up with a wig. Yeah. And eyebrows strong. What's the problem? Kind of like Rock Lee and Mike Guy, right? You got to show up dressed like the master.

Johnny, there's like a whole lifetime of shit But look at It's so minimal amounts of likes and stuff See, I'm fucking algorithm farming Like you motherfuckers could not believe I'm stepping I mean this is well done, is

It's not bad As we're here What I want to do is step Well it's not good And there's this guy is here He's participating She's got friends That's the craziest part man

It's like this whole shit's been going on under our noses this whole time. It's like Rex Cuando. Yeah. Like it makes Rex Cuando which seemed like a cartoonish, like a exaggerated caricature

stereotype look totally normal. They just found him there, yeah. Oh, they have a YouTube button? Oh, okay. Nothing. All right. It's a YouTube button.

Yeah. to have a silver play button and the fact that we just are now finding out about this. Okay, cool. That's cool. So this is a two-parter. So this is a new Indian remedy.

All right. It's where you deep fry part of your foot. And then you rub it all over somebody. He just dipped his foot in a frying pan with boiling oil in it. His heel. His heel. And is wiping his heel on this guy,

some old guy laying on a cot. He must be infirmed in some way. Behind the... Yeah. Just being... He's gotten to some sort of foot healer. He's riddled with maladies, and he needs a cleansing.

Oh! Now he's rubbing his fucking boiled, fried foot all over this guy? Then he pour some water on him Gives him a little more A little more cracklings for him Then he stands, he stands on one foot And he dips his heel in a boiling oil And a frying pan on the ground

Like a, actually Looks like a nice cast iron frying pan Unfortunately Yeah, that's a good pan, yeah That's a good pan, yeah And then he's still standing on one foot And wriggling his Boiled foot, his fried foot

All over this guy's body Getting that guy's dirty hand greased back in the foot oil and back in his shoe, like... What a disgusting... What a disgusting thing. Oh, it gets much better, too. So then, once you're here... He's done. Now the guy's getting up, he's like, thanks, that was great.

Well, see how he's obviously got leg pain? Now he's dipping his... What is he doing? Now the old guy got up from the cot, and there's like a five-gallon bucket full of... full of just disgusting murky water, like black water. This fresh water over there, yes. He's picking it up. The bucket looks like it's been used to mix cement for 10 years.

So now to show that he's fixed this guy's leg, see, look, he can lift this heavy bucket of water up. That's a 50 pounds of water. So what's great is, if you go to the second clip, So this is just where he explains. Why are these guys recording this shit? Well, because he's a faith healer. So this is an advertisement for his business to like, see, I made this guy walk again. He can lift this bucket up.

And so... Here's Sajawar official. Yeah, so he... He boils his foot. He boils his foot. This is in... And puts it on you. Look at this.

And then, uh, he makes you... Okay. Yeah. Then he makes you lift a heavy bucket of water afterward, but more often than not. How did they get dumber than Christianity? The scams are supposed to get more sophisticated. It's an upward, yeah. Yeah, like I'm reading magical tablets from God over here.

That's, I'm poisoning wells, I'm doing military shit. That's futuristic beyond their wildest imagination at the time. This is just like a... They're boiling feet. They're boiling feet and touching you with it. Okay, what's the second one? Well, so it's more of the same. but this is where he makes this asshole

so this guy clearly has leg pain because he's fucking digging his heel into like you know he probably twisted his knee or something scurvy probably I'm sure yeah some sort of like sick joint and skin condition

and then walking all fucked up and then you twist something and then it just keeps compounding on itself and getting worse so now here's where it gets great why don't these guys even have like old pants from British East India trading company Like Africa they have like old

You know football shirts that Yeah they got like Beetlejuice fucking shirts and shit Yeah furbies you know This is like these guys are like rolled up like This is still linen Linen pantaloons Stuff from the 1700s Raw textiles

But yeah So he's all fucked up yeah okay then you hear him groaning the whole time which doesn't add to it at all so then here's where it gets great is now

so he's sweating because yeah he's crying and sweating because he's in pain they need to help him up and then they're like okay lift a bug and water asshole is he crying out of happiness because his leg is fixed we'll see so someone has to bring it over

because he can't even stand on the foot and he's kind of like oh fuck like I got it like damn it so he's trying to lift it up on the strong leg and he's just struggling. It didn't work. The faith

didn't work. Guys, you didn't fix his leg. Stop. Stop what you're doing. He's got boiling oil on him and he's in more pain. And this was filmed in Vancouver, you were saying? Yes. You can't. There's no integrating this. There's someone else crying.

He's struggling. There's a whole. There's a whole platoon of guys laid out like it's the Civil War Yeah, he's And so he's wearing a brazier On his head, this guy And he's, you know

He's telling you about all this great faith healing He's doing One heel dip at a time Does he ever use the other heel? I don't think so. Look at all these guys! Look, the other one is the heel he wipes his ass with. here's some boiling foot for you that should make you feel better so i have one last clip for you if this was i'm sorry i'm just i'm flummoxed by

how just stupid this is i'm telling you man unparalleled diarrhea explorer feed going on because it's just i don't want this to be part of our lives man i don't want boiling feet If you thought the trucks was bad? Yes, I did. Wait till you get a boiled foot in the truck, too. It's just upsetting. Let's get this guy to call in, too. Maybe he can cure something.

We should get him to do a live deal. Boil some feet. Yeah, does he bring us on oil? Look, he's the champion foot boiler. Look at all these trophies. They just go to the trophy. score. Oh, so I called this sort of

Siri, play fire starter by the Prodigy. Okay. This is at a baby cue. Okay. It's a big, like a habachi on fire. Oh! They sprayed, uh, what is that?

What is that? They try to, I think they're trying to fire extinguish it. Oh, is that a fire, a little fire extinguisher? I think. Hmm. Yeah, let's see. Well, it didn't work. it was the fire re-igniter and this looks this looks intelligent compared to what we just watched

it's all extremely flammable plastic shit and look it even says baby cue everywhere because they're celebrating a baby or maybe they're eating a baby i don't know did they make this baby cue did they sell that i'm sure i'm sure there's a sect of etzy watts oh yeah etzy yeah etzy yeah all right everybody that's the show patreon.com slash the dick's show um we'll see you next Tuesday have a hard man Working Hard song. Oh, awesome. I forgot to play last week. Those guys are great.

They work very hard. Yes, go to their Patreon and support them. Let me find... And if not, we're sending the boiled heel guy out to fucking rubbs a dirty, deep fried foot right on your fucking arms. It's disturbing. Hard men working hard. Mothman.

Is it Mothman? Yeah, Mothman. Cool. There we Away we go And away we go And away we go Oh

Hey what's up doc Do you still have time For the humble bunny man Or should I come back next week Spooky Scaren the shit out of me Violated by a maiden dress Go on the white

Supernatural tennies at me while I lie The Bunny Battalion Hold on Can you hear me Oh wait a minute Wait wait wait wait I thought that was part of the song I thought that was part of the song

I did you get in there I dug a tunnel I dug a tunnel I'm a rabbit What are you doing? Shit the show I was gonna bring in all the Aaron Emhold stuff and call in but do you want me to do that next week Oh shit

Yeah you have Aaron Imhold stuff I do, I got a bunch The Clipaverse has agents everywhere I got sent as an agent of the Clipperverse Oh We have exclusive videos for your show Fuck You gonna watch it

You know watch Aaron Amholt stuff Yeah throw it All right let's give me Give me one of those videos Let's see it How you doing man So you you're basically responsible For getting Aaron Amholt sent to jail

Yeah I mean I guess so huh My 11th His 11th anniversary footage send his ass to prison. I mean... It seems like it. It's very surreal. Yeah, no, totally. I mean, because I caught Gino talking about Lady Rackets,

and that's ultimately what got the trial going again. Yeah. What an idiot. Okay, wait, where can I go? So it's in the Discord DMs. I sent you a Google Drive folder with all three videos. But first, can you play the one that's pinned on my Twitter? It gives everything else context.

Okay, so Schizzo, Sean, he was, went to Aaron M. Holtz, he went to Aaron M. Holt's live show at Stony's Bar and wherever that is. And it was, it was like, it looked like a real sad scene. I was like, how many people were there? It was like around 50 at that show, give or take, but, you know, they didn't check tickets. Well, they didn't check tickets, so only like 10 of them were there for steel toe. Oh, so it was just at a bar. Yeah, it was just at a bar and people, could wander in. And I didn't, I, I was a covert agent and they didn't check my ticket, even though I had one. And then you recorded the, you illicitly recorded the stand-up portion,

right? I did. I recorded the whole set and some of the outside stuff, like, uh, Aaron, the toe dancing to the last song, him and Nikki Rackett's listened to together outside. Uh, and during the, during the set, uh, Gino Bisconti was Aaron Imholz's friend, who was co-hosting the event with him really tore into Nick's wife and Aaron Imholt's not supposed to do that because of the revenge porn shit and that's also the guy that he sent

the Kayla's picture to it's a very very weird very weird relationship those two have a lot of rakes to step on a lot of rakes just two just two guys stepping on rakes together they're the raked

and then that I guess that was sent to the to the court and that busted him? Yeah, that's absolutely correct. And I got mentioned in the court. I was sitting right behind the toe and they kept mentioning an agent of someone I have an HRO against

recorded my set and that's why I'm here. And I was right there. Do you think you're an agent of Nick Ricado or of Patrick Melton? I mean, both probably, but specifically Melton because he's the guy that I sent the footage to first. But I am not. I'm an agent of the Clippaverse

and young Clippa, my mentor. Okay, let me play this video. All right. Here's Aaron Imholt walking into court for his revenge porn probation violation trial. And he tried to get it pushed back. Like he tried to get a continuance over and over and over again so he didn't have to deal with it.

So the judge said, yeah, sure, we don't have to do it that day. We'll do it three days before. yeah don't worry about it we're not going to push it out so we'll do it on Tuesday something whenever you backfire it again

all right here's here's the video it's Aaron M. Holt walking into and you're right on his ass laughs well you can't tell by the way I use my

one by the woman's man no time to talk a music loud when a man You have two angles of this guy in a lie in a lie in a life. Stay in a life. We're sitting in a league and everybody's shaking. Stay in a line.

Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, stay in a line. Oh. Yeah That's great It's great But now I get a lot And if I can't get in

I'll be to try I can't pay on my shoes I'm a damn The cops are going in now And closing in the door, I'm staying, I'm staying a night, stay in a night. Did you go there just for his trial? Yeah, absolutely. I had to document it. I'm a citizen journalist. I'm Kliperazzi, whatever you want to call it. Yeah. The people have to know.

How was it? Were you in the courtroom? I was. So I got there real early, like 3 a.m. to do a tech scout and make sure I got all my angles and whatnot. And that was a good thing because Tuckie, who was also supposed to be there, was in the wrong fucking courthouse. So if I hadn't been there, no one would have got, yes. So you said, not only did you send Aaron Imholt to jail,

you also saved the coverage of Aaron Amhold getting sent to jail. Damn. Yeah, we wouldn't have any of this without me. And, you know, to add on to that, I was also at the first trial documenting it, too. So, you know, the devilverse really owes me one. Society owes you something for sending this pervert to jail. Yes, I put a national security threat away, truly. Where you can't headbut any women.

He's only going to be headbutting Tyrone's abs. yeah well he'll like that right he's a he's into that sort of thing he's going to be they're going to be hold withholding the come from him yes uh and so um so this next clip how much is how much come is Aaron gonna eat in prison that's what we uh well how much come did he eat off a nicricata's chest too much uh too much that's i mean too much in prison then i guess can he get a can he get a sentence, can he get an additional charge for cum thievery in prison? Shower shenanigans? Shower chicanery, man.

Now, I thought, when I saw that Aaron was going to jail, I thought that you might get yourself arrested somehow just so you could go to jail with them and fuck with him some more. Well, I mean, he's splitting his 15-day sentence across like eight weekends or whatever. So, I mean, there's still time. I don't know. Maybe I'll go to St. Cloud and fuck around a little bit. Well, there's... Just get a drunken disorderly or something. They'll send you in for the night, you know? Well, I'm good at that, right? We know that from the content hotel. Oh my God, man, you've been doing so much. Fuck, I wish you, I didn't

know you were in there. I would have brought you in earlier. Um, yeah, no, well, no worries. Um, I'll just, uh, we'll get through these clips and then I'll, uh, I'll hop on out of here. But, uh, this next clip is, is the money shy. It's the exclusive that I saved for you, Dick. It's my POV as I walk up to the toe and interrogate him about what's going on, like paparazzi. Hold on, hold on. No one else has seen this. I'm bringing up your, oh, wait, okay. All right, where can I look at that?

It's, it's in the Google Drive, and it's the Sean's POV one. Okay. This is exclusive content, Johnny. You got, did you get kicked out of Content House, Chrissy Mayer's Content House? Yeah, so when I woke up after I was blackout and security and management came over, They escorted me off the property for the rest of the content hotel, but they didn't trespass me. I specifically asked, and I wasn't banned from coming back once the content hotel stuff was over. So mob mayor, you will answer for your crimes, mob mayor, okay?

And we are going to pull up, we're going to hop up, pull up to your event in Massaline, Ohio, at Crackpots Comedy Club, October 18th, all right? The clip of us will be there. They really, I'll be, I'll be honest, they don't know what to do with people showing up in real life. But that's because people normally don't show up to these things. Yeah, it's usually people Chrissy pays. Okay, Sean P-O-V, is that what I'm playing? Yep.

Okay. Uh, oh. All right, let me get the right size window. Okay. You're right there! Bro, you were like five feet away from him. Did he not know you were there? Well, so he pulls up and parks there, and he always parks there.

He'd park there last time for the first trial. And I'm sitting, and you'll see the other angle. We got two angles. The guy I was sitting with who got kicked out of Stoney's for asking for a hat. He was recording me doing this, and I'm talking to him a little bit before, and you'll see him. But I go up there, and I'm immediately, I'm just, he notices us, I think. And then as soon as I get on the door, he pops out. I think he was going to wait for like 15 minutes before the trial to walk in.

But I put the fear of God in him, the fear of clippo in him. Okay, here we go. Is it going to be a win for the toe today? Might have to go in those tunnels there. And I don't know. Might be the first L for the toe. You can't spell tunnel without no. What are you talking about tunnel?

So, okay, so the tunnel thing is if he had gotten arrested in the courtroom, he would have been the, that courthouse has tunnels that they take prisoners to and walk them in a separate area so, like, no one can fuck with him. Otherwise, I would have gotten the shot of him being let out in handcuffs. That's what I was hoping for, but this is what I had to settle for. That would have been a good shot. Yeah. Fuck, I forgot what I was going to ask you. Oh, you were, so you were in court? Yes, I was directly behind Aaron Imhol,

and Nikki Rackett was sitting to a couple people to the right of me flanked by like female paralegals too, which is very funny, him and his lady rackets. But yes, I was directly behind the toe in the courtroom. I could see his reflection. And when I brought up, when I got brought up, I know he was thinking about me right behind him. What did he say?

What did he say in court? That he loved Jesus Christ. There was a lot of that, just talking about how. how he rediscovered his faith and he hopes almighty God has mercy on his soul. Oh, and they said, Lady Rackett. Really? Yeah, yeah.

His whole thing was about how he's a Christian. So please, Judge, don't throw me away. I'm a Christian. And it's rediscovered. He recently became a Christian. Oh, okay. We're entering the Christian toe arc. But Lady Racketts in her victim impact statement said another win for the toe.

It was insane. I had to do everything in my power to not laugh when that. got dropped in the court house. Why did she say that? Because she's saying that like when Aaron mocks her, he says another win for the toe, you know, he sends her nudes to Gino and he says that's another win for the toe.

Just how it's like mocking her suffering, basically. Oh, oh. I mean, he does. Yeah, all the time. Well, wait, what does he say? He said, your boy didn't do too bad. Did he? Yeah, your boy didn't do too bad. But, yeah, so the last thing before I get out of here,

Wait, do you remember what he said? Do you remember what he said about Jesus Christ? What did he do when they said you're going to jail? What did he look like? He, I mean, he looked very, very sad and dejected. And, well, and he, I mean, that was pretty much it. He just said, you know, I hope my newfound faith in Jesus Christ will help support, you know, have the judge know that I've turned a new leaf.

I will never, ever say Lady Rackett's name again. and he said he would never work with Gino Bisconti again in his statement to the judge he talked about how he was done with him you'll never ever see me work on them again and that's all because I recorded when he worked with Gino and Gino talked shit at the comedy set in July so the anniversary show I remember I saw you at the event

and I was like oh he's gonna you know that's that's gonna be stupid did you see I got posted on his Twitter yes and then I saw him doing that and I was like oh that's a bad that's dumb that's a bad idea that's a bad mental state to be in look at you look at this fucking guy fuck you do you think he's going to violate his probation

and go back to jail oh 100% I mean he streamed before and after the trial he just can't help himself so him or Gino will have Aaron end up back in court at some point guaranteed like he'll serve his whole 364 days I think he can't help himself

he can't no he can't stop trying to think how many weekends that would be the rest of his life he keeps winning

every weekend for the rest of his life why would you stop when you're winning all the time oh god all right what are these

either of these other videos good yeah there's I have one last one for you called BBCC and this is one I was gonna play

on four canon sake young clippus show but his most recent episode got banned for talking about Eric July's baby and something about Nerf darts, so you know, I can't even talk about it too much.

But, yeah, I was going to save that for the show until it got banned, but, you know, if you want to play it, you can play it for your show. Yeah, sure. Let's play it. Oops. Did you put that bunny? There's a little bunny sticker on the wall. I mean, the Bunny Battalion put it there. Who can say,

who in the bunny battalion did, you know? A lot of bunny battalion members were at the trial. Oh, man. Fuck the toe. A rat and fucking snitch ass. Man. Loses his wife. He had a hot wife.

For him. Well, he has slam pig now. She's not too bad looking. She's not great. Oh, he's got a new wife now? Like we were talking about earlier, man. You can always count on people to be fucking shit up. Yeah, fucking that shit up.

I think he'll go back to jail, too. You can't. Yeah, 100%. Can't help himself. All right. Schittesoshan, thank you for calling in. Thanks for coming in. God, the Jesus stuff.

Did anybody write down exactly what he said? Yeah, Tuky did. And if you go listen to Melton's stream, I was on there. Tuky got exactly what he said on Melton's stream. Oh, okay. God have mercy on my soul. All right.

buddy have a good one thank you for calling in see you all right everybody bye uh hard man working hard I'm gonna start that one I thought schizochian was part of that song for some reason you know I thought so too okay

here you go see you next Tuesday I got raped by a ghost on a stormy night Violated by a maiden dress store on the white Supernatural jetties hit me while I lie Paralyzed by the grip but that gussy vice Visit from a spirit with a finished business I wish you could say I could resist it I finish quick because that shit is different

Don't laugh I'm the victim mounted by a Yeti in the mountains Rough pound and no help around theirs No sound save myself and an eight foot Eight man making out Do I bite down and think of home? Do I hold tight Enjoy the show Do I run?

No chance He knows these slopes Don't laugh It happened to a guy I know It was a paranormal sexual assault But nobody believe me They what All laughed at me and called me nuts

Oh fuck There's no escape from a paranormal sexual assault But nobody believe me won't Somebody make the rapist stop Bad luck It's not a date It's a Dracula, cut you off and got you stuff.

Grab your crotch, says he wants to suck your cock. Knock, knock, who's there? It's flog, you fuck. Let me in, because it's almost on a clock. Got a booty call from Satan's thrall. No game at all, just grab my balls. Don't fall into his lion eyes. Don't laugh.

He's got you hypnotized. You want to let me suck your coke. You know this. Ah, ah, ah. Yo, that freaky Dr. Frankenstein Figured me a hundred times Yo, you mean that nigger from the book? No another guy.

Not going to say. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa. Oh, boy. We're using the French R now, guys. Come on. Day it like you do in Australia. It was a paranormal sexual assault, but nobody believe me.

They, they what? All laughed at me and called me nuts. Oh, fuck. There's no escape from a paranormal. Normal sexual assault But nobody believe me won't What what? Somebody make the rape and stop

Bad luck, it's not a date, it's a Paranormal sexual assault And it's starting to please me they They what I'll call me nuts and lock me up That's hot, don't stop until a pop Paranormal sexual assault And it's starting to please me won't

Somebody exercise my cock Cockca Cock, cock, ca, ca, An alien, Probe my anal glands Hey no glands A zombie fuck My brain's out then

A mummy may be coming And now I'm queer And the mock man He's also here The invisible man jerked me off again He jerked me off with his invisible hands The wolf man made me

Howl at the moon And the mock man He's here too More gay shit Look It's in the name They're working hard man These guys only put out exceptional bangers, man.

Happy Halloween, everyone. Bye. See ya.