The Dick Show - Episode 52 - Dick on Waut3rgate

Episode Date: May 30, 2017

The time I drank too much on a huge podcast, Madcucks goes to an LA art show, a dramatic re-enactment of the Waut3rgate leaks, Maddox the job terrorism, the $15 minimum wage, an apology from McDonald's, three months to live for one DickHead, Juan's questions from Facebook, gay bars, Thomas Jefferson, gadgets that I want to bang, the Goss Squad vs. Asterios Kokkinos, the Street Fighter challenge returns, and Lettuce Jones can't get a straight answer; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy 52 episodes celebration Madcucks. Hey, thank you for having me. Madcucks and all his crowns. Yeah, brought all the crowns. Madcucks who's got a special suitcase. A level of nuts out in fact lives. Madcucks got a special suitcase for his crowns. I do, I do. I'm gonna think down. That way the check and see all those crowns for just a second.

Yeah. Yeah, thanks for having me. Got to come in for 52, because that's the real milestone of a show. Right, thank you. Thank you for just a second. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, thanks for having me coming for 52 because that's the real milestone of a show. Right. Thank you. Thank you for enlightening me on my screw ups. He's got a stereo, a stereo is blue is waterly,

came in a little bit too hot on episode 15. Yeah. And all real happy about his business. Yeah. I came in right on time, 52. Oh man, we gave this poor bastard a real LA experience this weekend. You're dead. Yeah, mad cucks.

Who was we? It was me and 80s girl. Oh, yeah. We brought them to an art show. Oh, no. Oh, no. Yeah. Yeah.

Was it a friend? Yeah. 80s girls friend. Of course. They opened up something. Sean, I mean, she was the, she had the greatest stuff there. Let me say, she drinks some Peno Grigio. And it was exactly like I wanted it to be,

and I knew it was gonna be, and this poor fuck from Oklahoma, of my face is I can feel my face. And I'm like, hey buddy, we're going to an art show tonight. Are you ready for that? I imagine there's gonna be a bar. Of course, when I say a bar,

any normal person would think like a place where you could buy drinks. You could change your abstraction for your money for something with booze in it that you might have heard of before. Like I'll take a beer. That's something one might do at a bar. No, not the case when we got

there. The the bar was this girl who had made her own coffee to the flavors of lavender honey coffee. And then like hoping dream espresso and she would throw in, she would throw in a heavy shot of Jack Daniels if you wanted it. If, and this was, this was $7 shot. This was not, this was not donation based. This was, hit me up and I also take stripe. This girl was more set up.

Oh, Bimbo. Did you come here, pal? She's like, she's like listening up all the different ways you could pay for this coffee drink. Like, better set up than me at Road rage Philly selling t-shirts to 400 guys. This chicken in a house in like in fucking Highland Park or go like one of them. What they do and see like in New York you've got the five burrows but in LA like every

neighborhood tries to cut out their own thing and make it as pretentious as possible. Yeah, it's what they say. It's a hundred suburbs in search of a city. Yeah, and they're all competing for like who doesn't want you the most. Every, every little, every lock in LA is appealing. It's hipster. It's every neighborhood is hipster. This fucking place, and I don't want to sound like I'm shitting on it because I love, I love these activities. Avis Grille said her friend is having an art show because you love to embrace the horrible. Well, because I see other people suffer.

We need it. We need, I do like that. I don't want to say, I don't want to say you wrong, but we need, I know what's happening at these art events. It's people in the city of failure. No. Or anywhere. They just need an excuse to get together and tell each other that they're doing a good job. That's right. That's exactly right. Because otherwise we just kill each other. Like, that's so funny. That was, that was, but before I even really understood what a hipster was. Yeah. That was my take on it. They said, they just seem like people who get together

who were never cool, who are always cool, man. No, but no, who are always traditionally cool. It's not a thing traditionally cool. Yeah. By mainstream societal standards like Ruby Star Cool. And they told each other that they were cool. And that's what a real need. And if we do the second we miss one, the whole city's turn into is gonna turn into is gay is gonna turn into the warriors Like we're all just gonna start killing each other. So I know what it's gonna be about. I know Mad Cux Maybe he's heard tell of events like this like in the lore of the Midwest Well, we do we try and do those in Oklahoma, but not anywhere close. Nothing like but not anywhere close. Nothing like that.

No. We get in there. Don't get good at it. That's all I have to say. It's like an Etsy store come to life. And the whole time I'm walking around doing, because I could fit in, I could, I'll be whatever you want.

Like I get what's going on here. I have no compulsion to force my personality onto anyone here. I got it. I like it. Let me see the sculpture you did. I love it. It looks beautiful. Reminds me of this. Very easy to do. Yeah. Very easy to ever, do they ever take offense? When you say something is like not derivative, but reminds you of because they're all unique independent little flowers.

No, no, no, no. That's a big, that's a fucking big one with musicians. Yeah. Well, I don't, I have, I treat artists and musicians differently. Musicians I hate because they're holding you hostage, the whole time that they're playing their song. So it better be the best fucking thing that they're capable of. And if I think that they are slacking in any way, I will, Mad Cux and I, so you judge it relative to them to what you think they can do. Yeah, because I know how easy it is to pick up an acoustic guitar and pretend to have feelings, girl. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, buddy. I think you could

have thrown in a couple of flourishes. You seem like you're kind of cruising in and you're not fat enough to be cruising in at this point of your life, pal. But somebody who puts a sculpture to get a Judy Garland covers coming out. Yeah. So what do you mean? You're not to be cruising in at this point of your life, but somebody who puts a sculpture together. I'm here, Judy Garland covers coming out yet. So what do you mean? You're not fat enough to be cruising. Yeah, somebody who puts an art together and they're like, this is my art.

You can just look at the art and then look away immediately and they're like, well, like they have to compete for your attention. So I judge it differently. Yeah, okay, make sense. Yeah, like when Mad Cucks and I were doing, we did a couple dictation episodes. I'd say, what'd you think of that art walk?

Anyway, that art. Uh, how long were you there for? Oh, ours. We were all there long enough. Yeah. Well, it's funny as they start to... How quick, how can I win outside and we're flirting with this photographer

while Mad Cucks is... He got too polite, too polite to get the fuck out of there. How quickly did you burn through your money? I didn't spend anything. You didn't spend anything, you didn't drink? I know, no. He drank enough for everybody. They start to introduce me.

They're like, oh, this is Mad Cucks. He's from Oklahoma. They're like, oh, you're from Oklahoma? Like an exotic animal. Yeah. Yeah, great. How many guns do you have on you right now? That's hilarious.

And what an asshole that he introduces you like. No, I said, this is our friend Mattress. And I said, he's a famous satirist. And just left. Yeah. And then I went to find the coffee, la Cours whiskey, which was actually good. Lavender, coffee.

I mean, I could have done without the preamble of what's in it and like what went into it. But what am I, hey, it's $7 booze. What am I complaining about, right? Then we took him to a gay bar. Oh good, okay. Well, that actually that need to walk. Well, night probably got better. Walked a half mile to a gay bar. No, it didn Well, actually that need to walk. Night probably got better.

Walked a half mile to a gay bar. No, it didn't get better. They don't mark gay bars anymore. Like, I don't want to sound like a homofub, but I am, I am. He's about to sound like a homofub. But today everybody says no offense, but, I don't want to sound like I hate your kids,

but they're like animals, but they belong in a zoo. Gay people? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, yeah, but yeah, you're right. Yeah. So it did not get better. No, it did not because they don't I am I am topped up on gay bars in my life topped off Topped off. Yeah, I am topped off on I don't need like I've I've been the I've gone through all the phases of gay bars as a straight man, which is like, oh, okay, I kind of see this is kind of fun. You could bring a chick here and there's like, not there's a different vibe and it's fun and it's okay that there's dudes in G strings dancing on the counter. I guess I just don't have to look at that. And yeah, I guess the mute, the chick seem to be having a good time. They really love it. They really love being in this atmosphere,

appropriating gay culture, whatever they're doing, they're drinking more, they're dancing more. Maybe, and then you think, hey, maybe the game is gonna rub off on these brides, right? They start seeing who can out-k, who in here? Like, no, now we're talking. All right, all right, all right. And then it's when they start planning it,

like, hey, we're gonna go to, then they start sneaking and we're gonna go to this drag show. I'm like, all right, I like that. I like that when it was my idea. I like the better when it happened on accident, but okay, I guess I could, I guess I could see that. I like the drag shows, because it's all crazy and out of control and whatever.

And they still, they got, man, again, I don't want to sound homophobic, but those gay bars really know how to serve drinks. Remember, we were in London one time, and the gay district. Yeah, but they stay open later. They do, and they would ask us at the door, we'd be shit-faced walking in there,

but maybe like you know what this bar is, right? We're like, yeah, we just want a drink, yeah. It was fucking you, no, do you know who we are? Yeah. Why don't you, you need my bar references? I want you to call this bar manager and this bar manager and they'll tell, I want you to call the truckadero. Yeah. Phil Delphi, that guy will tell you how much we drink. I want you to go check the Tams for puke. It's about 60% puke right now from us.

Yeah, let us in here. And then it goes from, hey, let's just, let's let's just, I want to go back and party. It's the girls. I want to go back and drink and dance at the gay bars. And now I'm like, look, I can't, I can't do it. I think that my, my, I think it's starting to rub off on me. Okay. But I'm getting this weird gay vertigo sitting in the skate bar, like just staring dead eyed ahead, while this music is pound, the music is so goddamn loud that Mad Cux climbed up on the furniture and unplugged the speakers.

Really? Yeah. Without loud. And he plugged them back in when we left though. Yeah. Didn't anybody say anything? No. He just didn't want to, he didn't want to fuck with the DJ.

That's funny. Anyway, what did you think of that art walk? Ah, man, it was really weird. Because I've gone to art walks in Oklahoma. And it's mostly just like really shitty paintings and stuff. It's like, oh, I, here's my photography. But this is like really weird eclectic shit that people have put together over time.

We're pushing the boundaries of art. They had a photo booth, but not like a photo booth where you got your pictures immediately. I'm gonna take your photo and then you write down your email and I guess I'll figure out which one's you and send it to you. I was wondering that as well. There was this photographer taking pictures and you had to write your email down like in an open house.

And I was like, so what? You're just gonna remember? Who? I don't know. I'm just gonna spam you. It's idea first, idea first here. We did a commentary track for Rambo last night. Oh, cool.

Yeah, it was great until somebody in the chat, we were live streaming it. It's which somebody in the chat told Madcux, they were going to send him a free gun. So he spent the entire like several minutes texting and emailing this guy to get his free fucking gun. Oh, so then there goes the best. So then I really railed him for like the last five minutes of the movie. That's coming up.

It's great. All right. Good. I was on. How's the twitch thing going? I don't know. We twitched yesterday. Did you did you twitch with coach after the power came back on? Oh, yes. So the power went off at the end of our show last week. Yeah. And it made me we were talking to Madcux actually. Yeah. And like the chat was still going, but all of a sudden, yeah, just the whole side of the mountain, right? Yeah. And coach city of power, coaches waits until that perfect moment,

like, what is the bottom of the, then the zenith is the top. What's the, the asmoth coach waits for that asmoth of failure. That's what he does. Like, coaches like a sperm looking to impregnate that egg of failure. He's just waiting for that shit, that membrane to get as low as possible, then he dives in like a bomber.

He waits for that asmoth of failure where we're completely wrong. And he just leans over and goes, I'm not sure it'd be nice if you had a generator. And I'm like, oh my God, you're right. Fucking Buckley. Now I'm realizing that Buckley just stole the generator that I stole.

Like I didn't fucking sell. He just took it. Bastard. Anyway. That's all that. Powering out, it came back on a little bit. We managed to stream a bit, but I was way too drunk. Speaking of way too drunk, I did the pain killer

already podcast. The what? It's called pain killer already. Pain killer is already. PKA. Okay. Yeah, this dude, this dude, Murkaderka. Hit me up on Twitter. He's like, hey, do my, come in, this dude, Merca Durka, hit me up on Twitter.

He's like, hey, do my, come in, I really, I fucked up. Merca Durka? Yeah, it's a, I fucked up on the podcast. I hope I didn't fuck up their podcast, but when it was done, I was like, oh God, I think I fucked that up. Like, like you mean like permanently fucked up their podcast?

Well, no, just like, and who you have that kind of power? As being an obnoxious, you know what I mean? Dinner's I've ruined. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, but like, and who you have that kind of power as being an obnoxious, you know, me dinners, I've ruined. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, but I mean, that's really cool. If you have the power to actually just you're up in Heimer. I hope not. Yeah. Destroyer of podcasts. No matter how, if you even mentioned me, I will destroy the thought of me, the, the animus of me will spring to life and your subconscious and destroy your podcast from within. Um, Mercadurka hit me up.

And, well, you know, a lot of people come onto this show and they just get pilloried in the comments after. Like, they get savaged. Like, nothing I've ever seen in my life in the comfort for doing, for not doing exactly the right amount of talking, not doing enough talking, not bringing enough to the table. So I'm like, all right, I've got a year of seeing other people fuck this up and seeing the feedback.

Because I'll read the feedback of other people. It's just academic for me. Shove, broider. Yeah. Like, can I get? Guys, guys got a point. He's saying it. He's saying it in a the meanest way possible.

But he's got point. So I said, okay, I'm gonna take all this knowledge I've got. Like I'm like the Alex Trebek of guests, right? Like I've got all the questions and answers for so long. Now I'm gonna play Jeopardy. I'm gonna see what it's like to be a guest on this show where there's already a rapport going and where I could just completely fuck it up.

So Merkaderka says, hey come on this, come on the P.K. I, Pinkler already. I'm like, oh, okay. I go, I follow his links. Just to get a sense of the lay of the land of this show. I go to his YouTube and I watch a video. And it's him and a girl doing a little show. I'm like, oh, okay, I could do that.

No problem. I'm good with okay, I could do that. No problem. I'm good with women. No problem at all. Day comes, he says, I had about a two, two, three hour podcast, and I'm thinking, oh, that's the same as ours. Two to three hours, no problem. So I, it's Thursday afternoon, about four PM.

I come down into the studio to do their podcast over Skype and I happen to grab a bottle of whiskey as I come down thinking, you know, maybe it's gonna be a lot of waiting around, maybe they'll have audio problems. It is a Thursday. Might as well start celebrating Memorial Day early.

So I grabbed this. What time? Four, four p.m. 30 in the afternoon. And for some reason when it's during the day, I think I grabbed this at what time? Four, four p.m. 330 in the afternoon. And for some reason, when it's during the day, I think I could drink more than at night. Yeah. Like I think it doesn't count when the sun is out.

Like that somehow it's evaporating. The angel shares leaving my body, this bottle of red breast, single pot still that, I think Hayden blazed sent me. So I sit down and load up the Skype, and I notice that it's not the same people as the podcast that I that I thought it was. Oh God. All right, this is a problem. So I was like, well, I know what to do when when things are unexpected and you're feeling

nervous, what you should immediately start doing is drinking. Yeah. Right. What is the podcast name? Pain killer already. Pain killer already. Did you watch a different podcast for the similar name? Yeah. No, no, no, I just clicked the guys' links. Like I just clicked, I just clicked links. I don't even know where to consume things anymore. Okay.

Like I just clicked links and ended up on YouTube. So I start drinking and I'm doing a pretty good job at a pace of two hours, which I thought it was gonna be. I think I'm learning to like, you know, I think I'm doing a pretty good job of shutting the fuck up and letting the people talk that everybody's listening to the show for, right? But then the liquor keeps going.

And then the liquor, you know, that's what it feels like. Everything is a good idea and should be said immediately. The fourth drink turns you into Alex Jones, where all of a sudden, all of a sudden, I remember shutting the, first of all, I got caught in that show, I got caught in the most fucking embarrassing lie that I can remember telling in recent history. Really? Yeah, I made a joke.

Do you remember that guy, FPS Russia, who is real professional Russian and he would just shoot guns on YouTube? No. Dude, this guy would have like, he would have like flammable shotgun rounds and he'd go, I am real professional Russian. This is how we, and all he would do was shoot. I do remember him. Yeah.

Okay, well, I thought that that was a real Russian. My whole life, like I saw it and I would watch, I would watch his channel all the time. My brother-in-law would put it on, like the first time you could put something from a computer on the big on your TV. We would like put it up and watch his show and drink for hours, like entire Saturdays before he had kids. Huge fan. So I get on the show and somebody's making a reference about guns and I'm like, yeah,

like FPS Russia and they go, uh, you know that one of the co-hosts that you're talking to and looking at is that guy, right? Dick, you know that the guy you're just talking about is that and I go, uh, yeah. Wow, it's like the drinking or just not wanting to fuck up, but like, I'm in that mode of drunk where I feel like it's like, I'm like in a suit, like in a fat suit that is me and I'm like, like an old-timey diver suit? Yes, yes.

So you can see out the little porthole, but it's very far away. Yeah, but I can't touch the fish because I got all these rubber gloves on and they're like, dick, you know the guy you're talking about is one of us right and I say Yeah, like I hear myself saying it. Yeah, and I was like oh shit. No now you can't back Now you can't back that up Yeah, I didn't really think it was a real Russian Yeah, of course of course I do And you can totally tell, I'm sure,

like you can always tell when people are lying. Yeah, I was so embarrassing when I said it, I was like, oh no, man, this is like, this is a guy, this is a guy whose video you actually watched as much as you usually tell people that you watched their things. And you just didn't, I was like, man, I tried to save it, but of course, you can not save a lie. That's not possible.

What was the, how long was the interview? Four hours. So my, you were on for four hour and a half hours, oh my god, because it was fun. It was a fun show. So it sounds like it went, I mean, when they just kinda, you know, yeah, thanks for coming on, see ya.

But you're two, at one point, the main guy, Woody, guy named Woody Gamer Tag, who I found out, I looked all these guys up later and I'm like, oh, a million and a half followers, two million, great. When you go, you fucking drunk asshole, embarrassing yourself in front of like 10 million fucking people, because you can't stop drinking, because I had, you know, because I'm at a two hour pace, Sean.

I'm at a two, like, I know how much, it's like you do, Nat. It's like you're doing the Indy 500, but you thought you were going 300 miles. So you used up all your gas, three quarters of the way through the race, except in this case, the gas is liquor and being drunk. So I'm out there in the Indy 500 stumbling around,

like a jackass screaming about Seth Rich for no fucking reason. No. I really embarrassed myself. And it's out there now forever. So go check it out if you want to see me on the PKA podcast and thank you for inviting me on there. What's the show about? I mean, what is it a topical show?

Well, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Mac. Eventually. What you got to do cardio for two hours or two hours. Yeah. You know, I mean, that's your, you're at cardio rates right there. Just, just ranting, which is very impressive. You're talking about my heart rate, man. Yeah. I'm talking about your heart rate monitor. Heart rate monitor was a big success. Do you have it on? Yeah. Yeah. It's all you got it on. It's one. He hit 160. What do you see? It's at the bottom. It's right in the middle. All that then. Oh, yeah. The thing that looks like it shouldn't be there. Yeah. The big red numbers. Yes. That's my.

Yeah, I was worried this would be a bust. The heart rate monitor. I got a heart rate monitor so people can watch my heart rate on the stream. Because I got, like all men, I got that gadget, Philia, you know, like if I want to, if I see a new gadget, I want to put my dick inside of it.

Right away. Right away. Yeah. Men, men instantly, a new technology comes out. We're like, oh shit. I need to fuck that. I could, I feel like I could use that in my life. Something you never, never ever possibly need. Like, oh, this is the, uh, the birth rate went way down after the invention of a pencil sharpener. The fidgets, yeah. I got this for guys fucking a pencil shot.

I really do. I see it, I see a drone or anything or something that's controlled by Wi-Fi and I'm like, God, I gotta get that and fuck it. I really gotta buy that thing so I can fuck the shit out of it. Yeah. My brother, I went over to my brother

along his house, other week, a couple weeks ago and he's like, hey, you gotta come outside and check out this drone that I just got and I'm thinking, you fool. I'm gonna fuck this thing. I know what happened here. You thought you wanted to fuck that? You saw a drone and you wanted to fuck it

and now you're sitting on a hundreds of dollars piece of equipment that you're gonna use maybe a couple times. Like so I'm selling, and I'm looking at it the whole time, but in my mind I'm laughing like a super villain. Ha ha ha, you fool. You feel like apocalypse from the X-Men. Was it one of the ones where you can like,

it's got a camera that you can stream the camera to your phone? Oh yeah dude, it's dope. Those things are cool. Yeah, even as I'm saying it, I still wanna fuck it. I still wanna fuck it. I want one, then things are cool. Yeah, even as I'm saying it, like, I still wanna fuck it. I wanna fuck it. I still wanna fuck it.

I want one. Then I'm starting to ask, I can feel myself slipping. I can feel my resistance slipping on. Uh, how much was that? No, don't, and then that voice like, you fool, no, you don't do it, don't fall for this. I'm falling for this siren. This digital siren.

Did you have to, do you, so this is what I say when I get one of those things that's always like, oh, how much was that? Oh, it was a daily deal. I got it, I got a super cheap. They paid me to get it. I got paid to leave a review on this. It's like, I paid like $250 for it and just to embarrassed.

Who you saying that to? You know, everyone. Yeah, everyone in the world right now, I have girlfriends, you know whoever So I thought this I was worried this was gonna be the same thing as that. Oh, what's that? No, it's cool It's pretty funny. I knew I was I knew I was too drunk in the p.k.a. podcast when when the host Woody I Had I just went on some ridiculous political rant and he's like hey, what are you drinking there dick? Oh?

No ridiculous political rant and he's like, hey, what are you drinking there, Dick? Oh, no, that's it. That's a very polite way. Oh, I say you drank too much in ruined action. Oh. Let's see, what makes you arrange this week, Mad Cucks? You bring anything, I got debate questions for Mad Cucks. Oh yeah? People want to see this guy debate himself.

Yeah. Do you do rages first? Yeah, you bring it. Here's the mix me, a rage. see this guy debate himself. Yeah. Do you do rages first? Yeah. You bring it. Here's the mix me a rage. The $15 minimum wage debate. OK.

Yeah, that's a great rage. I'm so sick of fucking hearing about this living wage nonsense. We need a raised minimum wage to $15 an hour. Because these morons are arguing against themselves, and they don't seem to realize it. Because what are your skills that you deserve 15 dollars an hour to work at McDonald's or to scan groceries at the grocery store? Yeah. You know what a $15 minimum wage looks like? Yeah. Self checkout lanes, which are a big problem, as I've said in the past.

Yeah. You know, it's going to be, if we go $15 minimum wage, it's gonna kill brick and mortar stores entirely. Like you're gonna, Walmart and Target are the only things that can stand up to that. So you're gonna, everything's gonna shift to online and we all know that online selling sucks because you get something. It's the wrong size and it's like, oh, well now we have to charge you $17 to ship it back to us. You know what they fucking did to me? Amazon this week. I ordered all these men and men and women books, so I could sign them and put them in the store because people are always asking

and I'm like, look, I wanna get you a signed book but I just can't do stuff on time. So I might as well get 30 of them, sign them, put them in the warehouse, then you could order them and ship them out. Sure. I ordered 30 thinking, what could be easier than this? Dude, they showed up during the rain on a weekend

when it was raining. The fucking guy put them right in the middle of the yard, like a full... Up, good enough. Like a terrorist. Yeah, like a suspicious packet. Yeah. There's an awning, at least lean them up against the house

Like put them on there's a there's a suck to put there's a cactus in the yard put them on the side It looks the most dry Not just in the many was in the rain when they got delivered So that could so I show up to a rumpled cardboard box full of my legacy I'm like, what the, so what am I supposed to sort through, like they're all warped. They're all a little bit warped,

even the ones that are barely warped, like you can tell that they're fucked up. So I'm thinking, do I just, do I send these back and then they're just gonna burn them? Like it was, eh. Yeah, so that, I mean, that's what $15 minimum wage looks like. People are just getting paid to do nothing. Yeah. And they, they say it because there's the argument of, oh, we're gonna, our, the loaf of bread is, it's too expensive.

You can only, you know, it's like, okay, but if we raise the minimum wage for everybody to $15 an hour, then loaf of bread is going to go from $2 to $5.50 a loaf. And we're going to have the same fucking conversation in three more years. Now, just, you're arguing against yourself, there should be no minimum wage. You should have to negotiate your wage based on your merit as a human being. Because these people can't even be bothered to not put a fucking pickle on my burger and you want $15 an hour, every fucking time I go to McDonald's and get a, the wrong soda or the burger with a bunch of like gross ass shit on them just like and you motherfuckers want $15 an hour for this. Oh sorry we gave you soggy fries

but please please pay me double what I'm getting paid right now not to mention the fact that a devalue's skill labor you know I don't know what Sean gets an hour in his regular job but I'm I'm sure it's a little bit more than $15 an hour so you think that you ad dipshit who's stocking shelves at Walmart is worth as much as someone who spent time and learned and mastered a trade. No, you're doing a dipshit job. Better yourself, get a better job,

and then you don't have to worry about them in a wage because you'll get hired at higher than the minimum wage you fucking moron. Yeah, here's the thing about that though. I don't think bettering yourself is a good enough solution. Like the number of acoustic guitars never been played for sale on Craigslist tells me that the no minimum wage

or that there needs to be something. Like there's no, there's not no, no amount of ITT tech commercials is gonna suddenly like workforce if I and mobilize Most people I want a government so small I can barely like a very anti-liberitarian You're tempted you're talking about a social safety net feel a dick versus dick coming on No, go ahead. I think that like it seems to me like most of the Most of the preposterous conversations that everybody has around social security

and safety nets and minimum wage and stuff like that is just because they can't admit that a lot of people just will never be able to work. Like it's fine. It's fine. I'm fine with if we just kind of come together and say look, it doesn't matter how many programs we put together and come together and say, look, it doesn't matter how many programs we put together

and how often we say that we want skilled technical labor, it's just not gonna happen. Yeah. It's not, this guy can't do this. But you're also, as a teenager, like, what was your first job as a teenager? I worked at a toy store. Yeah.

And you got what, like four four or five bucks a hour? Four or five, four or 50 an hour or so. Yeah, I did, was definitely pro-ream. Do you remember the amount of theft that was probably going on? Oh, man, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's probably making about 35, 40 bucks an hour. Yeah.

I stole a whole Nintendo 64 from that place. Nice. Yeah, I mean, that's what you did at the Teenager. You're still a bunch of shit from the place that I worked. Yeah. Yeah, so like my first job was at a convenience or a gas station and they paid you very well, but the thing was like, once you got through your training period, if you sucked,

they fucking fired you instantly. Like you had basically two weeks, and if you weren't up to stuff, you were gone. But now they raised them in one wage, and so they actually, that company hires less and less teenagers now, because they're too dumb, it's not worth the money to train them for two weeks

if they're too dumb to mop a floor. I see what you're saying. So I think a weird way to address the problem. Yeah. Okay, minimum wage is 15 bucks. All right, so you're making sure that the people who are not worth that now have absolutely nothing.

Yeah. Well, and then there's also the problem of they want you to have to have health care. The whole 40 hour maximum a week is bullshit because it you should be able to negotiate that. Like, I'd like to work 60 hours a week. I'd like to work eight hours a day, seven days a week because I need the money. But you can't do that because we have this. Well, that's called having a week. I'd like to work eight hours a day, seven days a week because I need the money. But you can't do that because we have this. Well, that's called having a salary.

Yeah. We have this $40, 40 hour a week work week that we're all suckered into. But what's even worse now is with the healthcare bill, if you work over like 35 hours even part time, you're now considered full time, they have to give you health benefits. So it's even worth less to them to hire you

and to give you the hours that you need. So you end up working two and three jobs, 15 hours a week at this place, 15 hours a week at this place. It's weird. Just so that you can have enough money to do anything. Like we've got so much regulation in the, in the, you're gonna have an Uber driver

who's like working mechanical Turks on his phone and making necklaces with his other hand while he's driving you around. Just keep it by. There's eventually, I think that there's gonna be like an Uber Amazon crossover where the Uber driver's gonna drive around, but it's also gonna have packages that's throwing out the, throwing out in your front yard.

I mean, what's this, box books? It's in the front yard now, close enough. I don't know, I think I might've seen it on a Jordan Peterson thing. I've been watching a lot of Jordan Peterson's. He's the red pill changes every couple of months. Oh yeah. There's a new red pill Jesus going around,

red pilling everybody. You got it. And they kind of mellow out, you know, after they've been, and I think it's Jordan Peterson. Well, you get a tolerance. Yeah, get a tolerance. I get used to the sound of his, everybody gets used to the sound of his voice

and then they're not triggered by him anymore. Right. Doesn't matter what he's saying. And he was saying that something like 20% of people just can't work. And that's the whole problem with both sides arguing about minimum wage and security nets and stuff like that is that they just can't admit

that a lot of their people just can't kind of contribute to society. And be an Instagram model or something. Yeah, yeah. Some can't even do that, man. Yeah, I mean, that's definitely a stretch for a lot of people. And that wouldn't just be better if we kind of admitted it and figured out how much it cost to pay for those people.

I can instead of making it this, instead of pretending that it's not true because it is true. I mean, you do have a point. I just, I'm tired of hearing about it because you don't deserve something for nothing. It just pisses me off. It's just, it's just stupid.

You like, you really think, you really think that McDonald's gonna pay you $15 an hour. You don't think that there's gonna be a key odds for your job. Yeah. I mean, I would have been worried as a, if I was like a professional cashed year at a grocery store, like if that was my career, and they started putting self-check out lanes,

I'd be threatened, buddy. Yeah. Yeah. I'm sure you would be. Anyway, yeah, that's my rage. I'm just, every time I hear it, it makes my blood boil. The minimum wage thing, the minimum wage debate, yeah. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know why it doesn't piss me off more than it does because it's already one. Like if there's already a minimum wage, just make it, it doesn't matter. Making a hundred dollars an hour. Yeah, you already. So Mark Zuckerberg's talking about doing the thing that Sweden does

where they just pay you like a salary for being alive. Like if the government's just paying us all like a living fee, why don't we just not pay taxes instead? Well, because the people who need it don't have any money to pay taxes. This is the problem. That's the problem.

That's the problem. It's like a catch 22. Yeah, yeah, I hear what you're saying. Here's what makes me raise. I got a couple of callers to call in. We're gonna talk about Watergate too. Sean, you don't know anything about Watergate to you. Somebody mentioned it to me yesterday, just briefly.

Who? Just somebody. Somebody. Somebody. Some secret, some secret. A lot of cloaking dagger stuff going around this day. A lot of secrecy. A water boy, God, what? Maddox threatened water boy, like a mafia boss.

So we're going to go through a great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, here's what makes me a rage. When the hand holding thing on the car is too far away when the close drying thing on the car, the dry cleaning hook is too far forward so you can't hold onto it comfortably like a trucker pulling on their horn. I rarely get the chance to be a passenger and when I do, I want ultimate comfort. I want to stick my feet out like a lazy boy. I want to put my, I want to put this hand out the driver's side window. That's what I do. I'm doing a clothesline of 80s girl all the time when we're driving around. I get so stretched out like a starfish.

And this hand, my right hand in America, I want that hand hanging from that dry cleaner hook, which I don't even know why we have. Yeah, you want it straight up, right? I want it straight up here. You want it pulling my goddamn shoulder out of its socket. I want it comfortably right here. And you want the window down that way you're flexing to the whole world as you drive by.

Yes, yeah, that's what I want. That's what you want. And when that way you're flexing to the whole world as you drive by yes Yeah, that's what I want that's what you want and when that thing is in the wrong place I want to just rip it off the roof and stick it where it belongs Because that's it's only function is for dudes to look cool. Yeah, maybe you should move the seat forward No, no, I'm talking about no all the way on the front Sean like all the way like where it feels like you're about to launch a Bob sled Yeah That defeats a purpose like that all the time Sean they're like this. Yeah, they're like this This is a really and you can hang dry cleaning from it. I don't even know what it's for

It's it's not straight up though. Well, no, no, no, I know they're not straight up They're not always straight up and it's teasing you like when the window doesn't roll down all the way. And you're stuck there trying, you're stuck there trying to angle your fucking funny bone onto the window just to drive, just to just to ride in peace. And then you reach up to hang your arm,

your big beefy arm off something, because that's all the only thing you do every day is arms. And what do you do? You got nothing. So you gotta reach up and touch the top of the car. That's no thing for a man to do, holding the top of the car. It's all hot and gross.

Then you bring your hand in and accidentally touch your shirt or your pants and you got grime all over you Never gonna come off. You got that cold card just all over you or wax That actually does bug me and I know what you mean there are the show that are somewhere pretty far forward It's like you're writing like an like an ape hanger. Have you ever been in one that has both? Both what both both a far four one and a straight up one? No. It feels like there's a, I think we read it.

It feels like you're rock climbing. Yeah, it's like you're rock climbing. It's like why do I need both of these? Why does anybody need any of them? Or they got the little hook there, so you have to check because you can't resist. You can't resist hanging your arm off some, so you got to hook your little pinky and that little hook

just so you can get some relief or else you have to sit slumped into the bucket seat like a child, like you're waiting to get driven around. You have no power at all. Takes away your agency, Sean. That's what they're doing with these cars. All right, phone losers sent me another prank call. Ah, here you go. Hey, Dick Brad here from phone losers sent me another prank call. Ah.

Here you go. Hey, dick Brad here from phone losers. I heard you had some problems over at McDonald's and as you probably know, I moonlight over there at the corporate office for McDonald's. So I went ahead and called up the McDonald's that totally fucked you over. I gave the manager there a good talking to,

made her and the employees make amends. Here's a recording of the phone call. I hope this makes you feel better, dick. Thanks for having me, Dad. I'm talking to made her and the employees make amends here's a recording of the phone call I hope this makes you feel better dick. Hi there this is Brad from the corporate office with McDonald's. Hi Brad how are you? Hi not too bad. I'm calling about the incident that happened there a few days ago with the diet coax in the drive-through.

Are you familiar with that? I'm doing refresh my mind I might be. Okay well it was a guy named Dick. He was in there getting some diet coaks. And he got about a block away from the store and found out they were regular coke. Oh, no.

I don't know anything about that. No. We just need you to kind of make amends for that. Are you by the front by chance? I am. Because he's saying it's like a bait and switch. And his heart rate was through the roof. And he has the fit bit logs to prove it. And you know, he's saying it's like a bait and switch and his heart rate was through the roof and he has the Fitbit logs to prove it and you know he's a celebrity right?

We get him all the time. We get those kind all the time. Yeah well this one's like a really big celebrity. He does the the Dix show podcast. I'm sure you've heard of that. Right. No. Okay. He needed you guys to yell like yell out just to the customers in the store that you're sorry about it and you'll never get a soda order wrong again. Oh, you can get an employee to do it. That's fine. Okay. Hold on. Okay. Oh, no. Hello. Hello.

Okay. So, basically, just need you to yell out, you know, that you're sorry to Dick, and you'll never get a soda order wrong again for all the customers to hear. They did. Well, no, I didn't hear it on the phone. I have to have proof that, you know, so he'll call off the lawsuit. She's lying a corporate. She's lying a corporate.

She's lying a corporate. Okay, hold on. So just, car business. I'm sorry, Dick. Okay, you ready? Yeah, I'm ready. But are the yelling into customers? This customer has to hear it and they'll have to say I'm sorry, Dick. That's the guy's name is Dick. They're not going to say that. They're not saying dick. I probably, I mean, I'm not saying dick. Why? It's just a guy's name is dick. They're not going to say that. They're not saying dick. I'm not saying dick. Why?

It's just a guy's name. Richie, then. They're not saying that. They're just saying that. They're just saying that. They're just saying that. They're just saying that. They're just saying that.

They're just saying that. They're just saying that. They're just saying that. They're just saying that. They're just saying that. They're just saying that. They're just saying that. They're just saying that.

They're just saying that. They're just saying that. They're just saying that. They're just saying that. They're just saying that replace you with robots, man. Thank you. The way your heart rate is dropped from laughter. Oh, yeah. I finally got my apology. That's all I want. I don't want any of the money. Just take it.

I'll pay whatever you want just to apologize. Just fucking apologize to me. Oh, yeah, that's funny. All right, that's that's Brad from phone losers. Um, Robbo, you want that's Brad from Phone Losers. Robo, you wanna go through Watergate, the Watergate files? If Waterboys, if Waterboys around, tell them to call in, tell them to hop on the Discord,

cause this is fucking great. So Waterboy, after 80s girl got her job called, after Maddox's girlfriend, you know, Jessica called the called 80s girl school and made up all these lies. Followed with complaint with HR and said they should fire her right away. Water boy, I think had a problem with that. So he dropped some conversations that he had been having with Maddox into the, the Dixho IRC. Like he took some snippets of some insane conversations. I don't know why.

I don't know why. Waterboy wants everyone to, to stop being mean, I think. He's the guy that did the theme song for the show. What? He's here. He's here. Tell him to hop. Yeah, tell him to hop in the discord. He's just a nice kid. Yeah. That's what I get from him. Like I don't agree with what he's doing of trying him to hop, yeah, tell him to hop in the discord. He's just a nice kid. Yeah.

That's what I get from him. I don't agree with what he's doing of trying to make peace and like, because you try to make peace with people and you're gonna get fucked. Like, because at its core, you're trying to manipulate them into doing something they don't want to do. Well, he should absolve himself of that responsibility for starters, but he took it. Come on. It comes from a good place. A lot of bad things come from a good place. But when you're trying to convince somebody to do something, no matter what it is, no matter

what the reason, no matter why they're doing it, even if they're drinking themselves the death, you're trying to manipulate them into doing something they don't want to do. Yeah, they have to wanna do it. Keep it in mind. Yeah, because that behavior gets a lot of fucking blowback. Sure, it's a very interesting way of looking at it. It's true, and it's even, like you said, it comes from a good place,

but it really pisses some people off. Oh, sure. And what I'm saying. Oh, no, absolutely it does. Yeah, but it really pisses some people off. Oh, sure. What I'm saying. Oh, no, absolutely it does. Yeah. Absolutely it does. Because you're trying to, for in their mind, they see you as trying to trick them into doing,

because they already, in their fucked up brain, they figured out what they wanted to do, and you're trying to trick them into not doing it. So you're the bad guy. Sure. No matter how you phrase it, no matter what you think you're doing in your mind, that's not what's in their mind. Yeah. Be very fucking careful when you do this. And this is a great example of why. Cause this, this, this, this poor guy

is he in there is warmoin the discord now. He's getting ready. He said he's got a clear out some birds first. Oh, he's got the fucking birds. That's right. Sean, it's a kid in living in Nevada who happens to write kickass music for some podcasts, right? He's a nice guy. And this whole time he's been going back and he's been, he spends an excessive amount of time talking to Maddox and trying to get him to see that maybe the rapist video was not, not the best of ideas, right? And maybe he should have just apologized for doing them instead of continuously ramping it up. Double down, double down, double down. It's like, oh, this is, it's probably because his parents are gamblers.

It could be. Every time he thinks he said his auntie's like, well, surely the next hand is going to pay out. So double on this eventually he had you hit a blackjack, right? Break. Yeah. Bust, bust, bust. So, water boy, after the 80s girl thing came out where, where, where,

Maddox's girlfriend, you know, or someone calling, someone calling herself, Jessica redacted. Okay. Called the school and said, hey, this is, and said 80s girl and her boy and her boyfriend have a podcast and they won't stop stalking us Like first of all first of all, why does 80s girl get top billing? Yeah, first of all boyfriend and

Okay, this is I mean objection your honor. Yeah, if anything Insulting first of all, I mean she's working a lot behind the scenes if you know what I'm talking about. And where am I? I mean, how are you? 80s girl and her boyfriend have a podcast. And they also sometimes employ an audio engineer. So sometimes employee and audio engineer, not every episode. I swear to God, man, these complaints, it's like leaving, it's like reading a fucking child, these fucking complaints. But so he's been talking,

because I was just gonna ask what his, he contributed some things to, he's still clearing birds out, isn't he? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's taking a while, he's got like a fucking flock. And there's got a murderer of crows. He's getting out. He's got a menagerie of peacocks.

And a ostrich is... He can easily become a super villain with all these birds. Oh, he's got the make. This is the makings of a super villain. Fucking birds screeching in space all day. A weird name. I wasn't sure. I wasn't sure if he was still doing things

for Maddox, you know, writing music or anything like that. Cause I mean, he contributed a lot. He was just outing his chats now. Well, no, but I mean, he was, so what you're saying is what I'm getting is that he was, he was, he was trying to convince him that to see things a different way.

Like, maybe this wasn't the thing to do. Yeah. So he made this like, he went really far with it too. Waterboy made a site called like Make Rage, Not War, or something like that, where it's, I mean, to me, it's like a kind of a weird list of the various imagined infractions on both parts. Like I don't know, I don't get it. Guys trying to make peace.

He's trying to make, he's just't know. I don't get it. Guys trying to make peace. He's trying to make, he's just, I gotta think of it like Trump. Trump's in the Middle East trying to make peace between warring, between factions that do not want peace. How's the thing does not want peace? Like what are you doing? I'm not into the other business real. They want the land.

So, so he heard about, he heard about what happened in 80s, girl. And he was in the Dixho IRC, Waterboy was. And he posted this link to a chat that he had with Maddox. So I happened to be sitting there and I was like, oh yeah, you're going straight to Twitter. I take the link and I said, hey, Waterboy, I don't know what to tell you, but I gotta, I gotta post no good deed goes on in Hunters, I don't know what to tell you, but I got a, I got a, I got a buzz, no good deed goes on.

I'm in Hunters. I don't know, I got to know how to tell you this, but I'm definitely doing this because it's, it's funny as hell. So I take, now I don't do the ultimate dick man. And he suddenly just regretted everything he's done over the past like six months. He said, no. No. Like Tony knows.

I'm sorry, buddy, but in my, like, this is what makes me different to everybody else. I'm just gonna push through it. Yeah, because I'm living in the future. A future you already paid for what you did. So I take, and I don't do the ultimate dick move, which is to copy the text, paste it in a document I control and then post it.

Right, because that's, I leave him, I leave him the out by just taking the URL and posting that. And then if he wanted to, he could just wipe the whole thing. Yes. And I? Yes. I like to give people the choice, Sean. I like to give them the option.

Let's the out. He doesn't do that. Because he knows in his heart that what I'm doing is right. Usually, doing the right. Usually, usually doing the right, what what what this will teach you. I think maybe I I learned from this whole watergate fiasco. See, I'm with those birds yet. He's attacking his eyes pecked out. First I'm going to go take a leak. Okay. Oh, so I was like a stereo. I was going to take 10 minutes. Yeah. He's carrying out arm loads of ostrich eggs

out of the like Easter bunny carrying them. Doing the right thing does not feel good. That's what I think about life now. It's like everybody, when you did the right thing, you do not feel good. There is no good feeling that comes with it because usually there's a lot of people that don't want you to do it.

Yeah, or that wouldn't have done it themselves. Yeah. And when you do it, you're gonna get a lot of questions asked about it, because it's usually very messy. Yeah. Usually sometimes involves breaking a lot of promises. Yeah. But you gotta make the call on your own.

And it's not supposed to feel good. Anyway, because he was beating himself up about doing this. Ultimately, it's after you get all past it, it's what sits alright with you at the end on your own. And it's not supposed to feel good. Anyway, because he was beating himself up about doing this. Ultimately, it's after you get all of a pass, that's what sits all right with you at the end of the day. I think what can you tolerate yourself doing or not doing? So this is one of the lines from the transcript he dropped was, you want me to read it? Oh, yeah, you read it.

Yeah. Do you want to do water boy and all of you? Unless water boy wants to do himself. I don't think he does though. He's down checking right now. Okay. Yeah, yeah, here. He starts here.

He starts here. He starts here. He starts here. He starts here. Yeah, yeah, here. He starts here. He starts here. He starts here.

He starts here. He starts here. Yeah, yeah, here. He starts here of being abused by these dip shits. Here's what I owe you guys Nothing. Yeah, and then water. I don't know you shit. I don't know you a podcast. I don't know you entertainment I don't know dac the fan base. I don't know anyone in explanation my personal life with my ex girlfriend Morning of this shit. It's time everyone fucked off and left me alone You owe me your gratitude for all the years of free content you owe me your gratitude

like myleys iris coming out with that you guys owe me your gratitude for all the hit songs. I've been putting on for all these years Farming my buns off being Hannah Montana one minute and Miley Cyrus the next welcome to the show water boy Yeah, I am I'm really going David Clegg on this okay I'm in the middle of setting something else up and then out and over Here let Mad Cux finish reading about the gratitude that we owe him. You owe me your gratitude for all the years of free content in my expense. If you don't like it, don't listen. I don't care. How about a fucking thank you?

Shondas, you ever, did we thank him? I think we thanked him. I thanked him on the first episode. Oh, thank you. Thank you, George, for the $500 Patreon. Oh, okay, wait, wait, wait, let him get let him get through the whole thing is too funny Dad's got into UCB because of me. Dad's the podcast now because of me. Dad's a girlfriend because of me. Yeah Dad's a half-town because of me. How much more can he use?

It's fucking easy for fuck him and fuck the fans. It took me for granted. That's the best part. I'm done, dude Because it's an all caps So this is a 40-year-old man typing to hey water boy. How old are you? I'm 22. It's 22 I can do a guy half his age half his age He lives in a bird fat right with all caps Fuck him and fuck the fans who took me for granted. I'm done, dude. I remember when my dad was 40. Can you imagine your dad typing to a 20 year old? It was a very, very different generation. Different generation?

Our dad's were too busy doing blow and injecting steroids into their balls to do this kind of shit. Okay. Just nobody owes anybody anything. Sean. Sean, we all know that I don't understand what he wants to stuff.

Is, okay. Is I write music, people make videos and stuff like that. I do it because I enjoy it. Yeah, yeah, exactly right believe me. I enjoy doing this a lot. I Know The thing I can't understand is like we know it like across in the world Yeah, just go back to like telemarketing or something like that, but they're not gonna think I'm there So why is he doing this? Yeah, he can't go back to like telemarketing or something like that, but they're not gonna think I'm there. So why is he doing this?

That's the thing. Yeah, he can't go back to telemarketing. Maddox tried to get a job last year. Maybe I'll tell that story in the next bonus episode. It was pretty fucking funny. If you knew, like you couldn't fuck up a job interview worse, if you just like walked in, shit your pants, then your pants fell over and you pointed at the picture of the guy's wife

on his desk and say, hey, I'd like to bang her. Yeah. The car on the, yeah, point that picture on his desk and ask, who's the cunt? Yeah, who's the cunt? Ah! Ah!

Okay, wait, this is another good part, too. This is Maddox talking, this is a private channel. Right, right. So, yeah, from read from there. So medics. I fucking had it. And one of his guess I shouldn't have been bothered. Yeah, you're offended.

Sorry. Is there a form of people who are harassing and slandering you and calling you a cuck and a faggot every fucking day? Please go on and tell me how you're offended. I'm over this dude. You have two options to defend. One, listen to the show. Two, don't listen to the show. That's it.

Here's the best part. Here's the kicker of Watergate. The rassing and meddling in people's personal lives is way over the line. That's what all the dickboards are doing. I just want to be left alone. I'm not going to escalate this. Please. I just want to be left alone. I'm not going to escalate this On IRC are you okay Sean? I'm gonna need a minute. I'm fine.

You want to be left alone too. That's all I've ever wanted was to be left alone. Oh, you fucked up. No one, you fucked up when you bought me booze when I was underage for the first time. And this is where you are now. That was the first thing that Sean ever did wrong. I said, hey, I need to get, I need to get my hands on some booze so I should get my girlfriend plastered when we go camping. And Sean said, yeah, I can help you out with that. He was also underage.

Yeah, way underage. He had a fake idea. And then I said, I got that booze. And I said, oh, I'm now in debt to you forever, we're bonded forever over the sacrament of the underage booze, Sean. It said, what are you talking about? I said, you will see, you will see. Oh, we'll be revealed. At that moment, you saw the full path laid before you. It's like, oh, I get it. Instinctly. Okay.

Oh, man. So that's water boy, you posted that in an IRC thinking you were just hanging around with a bunch of friends, right? How old are these chats? Yeah. The whole thing about that was I was just like, yeah, I've got there's some funny people here and I've been holding on to these for a long time. Yeah. And at the time I was talking to him, I was legitimately trying to steer him away from

continuously shooting himself in the foot. Yeah. Like what? What do you think is shooting himself in the foot. Yeah. Like what? Why do you think you're shooting yourself in the foot? He kept talking about like a nuclear option or how he wants all of these people around before you're right there. I was like, masters, everybody else.

And I was like, that again, sorry, Mad Cook's talked over you. You know, to piss you off. But he just, he shoots himself in the foot by saying that he wants people to leave him alone, but that he injects these seeds like absolutely everywhere. He's telling everybody everything. It's not just me. Yeah. A lot of people have contacted me recently saying, yeah, I got all kinds of weird stuff on Twitter too. Yeah, that's why I want to thank you very much for posting this shit because it only comes, like it only comes out because someone posts it.

Everybody gets sworn to secrecy and it's like a shortcut in the human mind that if you trick someone into not like, you can't say, I'm going to tell you something, promise me you won't get mad. And then you say, oh yeah, I crashed your car on purpose because I thought it would be funny. I crashed it into your mom. And it's like, well yeah, I crashed your car on purpose because I thought it would be funny I crashed it into your mind and it's like What do you mean you know you can't get mad you promise like don't fuck fuck you and your promises What do you mean like you he makes you house the car? Yeah? There was a point when we were talking where he's like you have to promise not to tell anybody

Sure, sure, and I was like, okay. And then he said, but I'm gonna ruin everybody's life. I was like, no, no, that's not okay. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. So thank you for posting it. So this is, so I immediately, because I'm a, you know, an asshole.

I saw that water boy, I know what was going on. I knew he didn't want to share it. I knew that it was meant to be shared only with IRC. Like, people are gonna dissect it and say, well, that's technically public. And it is technically public, but I knew exactly what was going on. So I took the link immediately posted it on Twitter, right?

Like, here you go. This is what, fuck the fans. This is what it's, this is what it's come down to. Everybody owes me, world owes me a living, right? Great. So, so within, I don't know how long I did that before I went to the gym. I like to get a good boost of testosterone when I go to the gym. So I usually will look at some porno when I go to the gym without jerking off. Sometimes I'll, sometimes I'll slap that leather, you know, but not to completion. Because I want the testosterone going around in my body while I'm lifting. This is what I,

today I did this, posted that, trans-referring. So I'm on my way to the gym and waterboy sends me direct messages. He's getting from addicts saying, what do I, what a fuck, what do I do? What do I do about these messages? These are, this is the follow up that Maddox sent him after those conversations were leaked. So Madcucks, if you would please do the honors of reading these. I love to, Nick, thank you. Yeah, Waterboy, do you want to do your part

or do you want me to do it? I'll read my part. Okay, I'm reading your tweet right now. Yeah, we got it up on your tweet. You're leaking my private conversations that you promised to not to share now. Coward. Okay. Enough is enough. I'm doing what I have to do. The problem with leaks is that they go both way. I can leak your private information to you. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick.

That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick.

That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick.

That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. That makes me sick. Then stop it, fix this bullshit. Since you lied to me, I guess you don't have a problem lying. Say the leak is fake and then leave me the fuck alone. Say the... Why would I say it's fake? Because you want to save people's jobs? No one would believe it. Um, are you fucking kidding me?

Say the leak is fake? Ugh. It's like... To save people's jobs. Like, he's got their jobs like a hostage in a... Yeah, I jobs, like a hostage, in a bank vault. You say the leak is a fake or I get the job. I get the job. I take this job, I kill this job.

You want, what, they're boy, you want this? Okay, maybe Ramadan, maybe guy really nuts with Ramadan starting, you wanted to take some hostages. I got to put your jobs right here. You want job, I get your job. You say it's a leak, got to tell you a job right here. You on job, I did your job. You say it's a leak, you say it's a leak right now. The first problem with this though, that I really don't understand is like,

literally as this was happening, I wasn't so much stressed out about what he was threatening, but it was more like I was watching someone present on stage and they were failing. I'm like, no, don't, don't do that. Cause he went to me after finding out that I leased conversations. Yeah.

And then he gave me something worth leaking. It's like, what the fuck is wrong with you? Why would you do that? So it's a strategic error. I want to do it. I guess. All right. He has no strategy.

And that's what's been most stressful about all of this. Yeah. So are you done trying to make peace? Done deal. He's, he's on a of this. Yeah. So are you done trying to make peace? Done deal. He's on a downward spiral. There's no stopping it. Well, actually, not your job. That day, just before all of this,

I was talking to him. I said, yeah, I don't believe that you're not on the offense. You're not doing defense. You are actually pursuing dick. And I'm not cool with that. Of course, that's really weird. I'm just gonna have to agree to disagree. We got to split.

This is weird. Well, thanks for playing the game. Thanks for trying. You gave it the old college try. And I hope you learned your lesson. Never, don't ever try. Don't ever try again. What makes you rage today?

You got anything? Before you go. I kind of think of what's immediately ignored, I can like annoyed me. But I could just just keep thinking of the fact that I got in a really bad car crash recently. Oh no, this fault was it. Texting?

It wasn't, I wasn't looking at my phone. I believe that it's probably my fault, but I don't know What happened? So there's a bunch of green lights one after the other and they were really close capacity Mm-hmm. I don't think that I saw the last one and I was just kind of It was at the corner of my eye so I got T-bone in the middle of the intersection. Oh, God, that sucks. Yep. So you ran a red light, essentially, and somebody T-boneed you? Or you don't know?

People are saying, for me, I did not see a red light at all. I thought it was green, but- Then don't drop that story. You're probably right. That's what I'm going to say is, I didn't see a red light. I thought that I was doing fine, and then I would smash my head into an airbag. Oh my God. But I got this really gnarly scar on my head.

Damn it. So maybe that's what makes me a rage because all this week, I have not been able to touch my forehead. There is a really bad gash in it. Yeah, I haven't been able to scratch it. I haven't been able to do anything with it because they literally just glued it together.

They didn't stitch it together. Yeah, I posted it in the discord. Hopefully you can see that. But yeah, it's just been itching like fucking crazy. Like they don't do anything, they don't tell you, yeah, this is gonna itch more than anything in your life. It's gonna make it impossible to focus on anything face on fucking sandpaper.

Yeah. All right, let's do some madcuck's debates. The greatest debater of our time. Master debater. Master debater, Dick, master debater. It's gonna debate some topics. How about, is a calzone a sandwich? It's a calzone sandwich. Oh god dammit.

You've got to write. I've got to write his final answer. I've got to write the answers to put them on the sealed envelope stick. That's how you know your master debater. Right. It's a calzone sandwich. So, I mean, we all know where the sandwich is invented.

It was invented by the Jews. And I remember that. Yeah, it was an open-faced sandwich sandwich with famous parentheses on both sides. That's how I ordered them. Yeah, it was an open face sandwich sandwich. The famous three parentheses on both sides. That's how I ordered them. Yeah. I'll have a PB&J sandwich. So the Jewish, the classical L sandwich

was served open face, right? And what is the Cal zone, but an open face sandwich stacked on top of another open face sandwich with a circle in the middle? So it pizzas the sandwich. Yeah. So that's the a sandwich, see ya. So that's the argument for being a sandwich, is that you take two things

that you made now a sandwich of pizza. Okay. The argument against it is that is the calzone crust bread does not really, not really think that's bread. And also you're putting a bunch of really weird things inside your calzone, things that don't normally go,

you don't have any lettuce on the cow's zone. Yeah. Sandwiches a lot of times have lettuce. Sure. So does that make it a sandwich or does it not make it a sandwich? I don't know, you tell me. Well, Sean, why don't you open that sealed envelope and let us know is the cow's zone a sandwich?

Yes. Yes, the cow's zone is a sandwich. The cow's zone apparently is a sandwich. The famous cow's zone sandwiches. Okay. I have never cared less about the answer. which yes, yes, the calzone is the calzone apparently as a sandwich the famous calzone sandwiches. Okay. I have never cared less about the answer. How about wow, all these are pretty very spiteful questions that people supplied. Twitter legal pads versus, you know, college ruled versus wide ruled paper. College rule versus versus wide rule paper. College ruled versus wide rule paper? Yeah.

So for those of you who don't know, there's two different types of paper. There's college ruled and there's wide rule. I think college rule is a quarter minute. You don't know. Oh! Perfect. It's a quarter of an inch separating between the lines,

which gives you more room if say you have sloppy handwriting, like a heart, your eyes., like a heart, your eyes, you have heart, your eyes, put a little bit of extra, you know, wide rules really good for putting a little bit of flare, making sure you got the serifs on your teeth and whatnot, especially if you're a young child like an idiot, you know? That's the kind of paper that you want,

you want the wide rule, wide rule paper. There's a paper for idiots. Yeah, well, there's also the bonus of it. So if you're in school and you have to write an essay, and it has to be like two pages handwritten, you want a wide-rule. You do not want college ruled, because then you, like, you have to fill more space

with the college rule. But they usually stipulate that. They do usually stipulate that, but if they don't, that's a Mad Cook's tip. So technicality. The college ruled automatically smarter. Yeah. You would use college rule paper,

you're way smarter than someone using a wide rule paper. You have to be more delicate in your writing and more precise, focused, like a samurai, because those lines, and not as far apart as on the other one. Like a grain of rice, you're writing. Yeah, you're like, right, yeah.

It's really complicated. It's an art. It is an art. And like I said, definitely makes you look smart in front of the ladies. You give, you give a lady a note written on college rule paper. She's going to think you're an academic. What about legal paper? Well, I mean, legal paper is, it's hands, head and shoulders above the rest because legal paper lets you get a lot out. Yeah. Let's you get all those words through. And it has like an authority to it. Like if you were going to write a love letter to the woman

that got away, you would write it on legal paper, right? Exactly. Because you want to think like you're disciplined like a lawyer. Yeah. Sean, you want to read what his real thoughts are? I guess. College. College, great.

Because I'm a, because I'm with the college dick. I'm a math major. Yeah. Uh yeah let's see what else we go here oh should you write one love letter or send or versus sending mass texts when a girl breaks up with you what's the best way to get her back that's the debate what a girl breaks up with you do you thin one long love letter or you thinned a flurry of, a flurry of, a deluge of text and like five in the morning? Okay, so here's, I'm passing the seal down below. What are the benefits and cons of both?

So here's the great thing about writing the handwritten letter. Handwritten letter definitely comes from your heart because you're using your hands with it. So there's a, there's an amount of ethos that's put into the paper automatically because you're writing it, you're writing it yourself. The downside, if you have terrible handwriting, maybe some of those words are going to get mixed up in translation. She was banging a pedophile for a lot of years. Yeah. And also, if you use the wrong writing implement, like for instance, a letter written in a pen

shows that you mean what you say. A letter written in pencil shows that you're not really sure of your words. Oh, okay. A letter written in crayon says you're so it's your path. Okay. You can also draw little pictures, like put a little flower on there,

little hearts, you can't put a heart in a text. I mean, you can. You can put the little emojis, but it's not the same thing. Oh, if you have an iPhone, you can put a red card. A heart, a heart's written drawn by your hand, though. That comes from your heart. Yeah, but what if you fuck up the heart and it looks too much like an ass?

Man, I don't know what to do. I draw perfect hearts every time. What job, what job, heart? So here's the plus about the text. Shows that you're committed. Shows that you're not, you're willing to do anything to get her back. Just one right after another, boom, boom, boom, boom.

That's how you show. She's always on your mind, Dick. It's one thing to sit down and write out a letter one time, but it's like an hour. Like what is that? An hour? Maybe three or four. When you're in tech, constantly you're on the clock.

Right away. You show that you have this. She sees that little du du du typing, typing boom, text, boom, text. It's like, wow, he's been thinking about me for all weekend, not just the one hour or five hours that he was writing this one long, it's true. Love letter on legal paper.

That's true. So she knows she knows that you're committed. So Sean, I wanted you open that seal down, though, can tell us. Tell us which one's better. Both. You gotta do both. You gotta send them, you gotta cover all your bases.

All right, let me thank you, Mad Cux, very much. We did a couple of dictation episodes since you've been out here. Thanks for coming out. I've got a guy on the line here. Let's get Chase on. Is that Chase? Yeah, that's me.

Oh my God, this is the Sean. This is the most brutal story for our one year, for our one year anniversary show. This is, this one's a little rough. Chase, you don't have a gun or a noose or anything handy. You're going to feel like a real asshole now. Oh, God. So Chase posts. We're doing this again.

Chase posts in the, the Dix show on Facebook. Okay, guys, I've been a dickhead since day one. How's Chase? How long have you been listening? Oh, man, since the beginning of like first episode with Maddox and all that shit. The biggest problems. You've been listening for years.

And what's going on with you? Well, basically, apparently I got some like a rare form of cancer that like developed within like three months and basically like, uh, fucking 20 people a year get this fucking thing. I have no idea. Three months. It's crazy. Dude, post on the Facebook group, hey guys, I got, uh, I got the rarest form of cancer ever. Dickhead since day one, I got three months left. Jesus Christ. Yeah, and of course everybody's making a,

and saying, prove it, prove it. Next day, it's, Jesus just got out of chemo with his dick show shirt on. And I'm thinking, oh my fucking God. What the hell can we do for this fucking guy? Let's go, let's at least get him on the board. Too much memes. Too much memes.

Too much memes. Yeah. Uh, so, wait, you want me to do like a rage or something? Do you have a rage? Cause I've got one for you. Yeah, for you. Well, oh, you got one for you. I got one.

You would think it would be cancer, but mine is just like not enough couch co-op video games not enough What couch co-op video games couch co-op video? True and the ones that exist we all know and love the Simpsons co-op video game the X-Men one Portal 2 but nobody's making nobody's making couch co-op games Yeah, Sean. Yeah, sure. Bullshit, if he asked me. There's not enough of them.

You're going to have to explain to me what I came to. You've all got the answers. One thing, but not enough fucking couch co-op video games is another. It's way worse. Split screen on you were your both. You're both on the same TV. You're both cooperating. Oh, you have fun together.

You can, when you're racing, Mario, you reach over and smack's fucking troll already. You see in I have to know more about chase. What do you want to know? What is this extremely rare form of cancer called? It's called listening to Maddox's show too much. Oh, that's how we got it. Yeah, reading to the comments of my post.

Yeah, it seems that I actually developed this by listening to Maddox speak enough. It's very dangerous. seems that I actually developed this by listening to Maddox speak enough. But it's called Desmo plastic small round cell tumor. Oh my God. I'm like, what the, like what kind of fucking Dave is that? So weird. So how do you get rid of it? If enough people like send prayers your way,

enough like, will that help? No, I need everyone to clap their hands really fast. Like, take her bell. Yeah, take her bell. Yeah, that's sort of like that. And like 14 weeks of like, chemo or something. Oh, second down. Get the clap.

So are you, let me ask you this. Let me ask you the important questions. Are you formulating like a last hurrah plan? I mean, I don't know. Is this treatable? Is this, I mean, is doing chemo, right? Well, well, it is kind of, I heard you say before, I guess, but 15% chance that I'm gonna live.

Oh, my God. And how old are you, dude? I'm 29. Oh, my fucking God. How did the shonny's never gonna know what it's like to start getting fat and you can't control it. Oh, I couldn't even make a joke. I couldn't even make a joke.

I put a lot of fluid and I have to get a trade every few days. Oh my God, dude. Oh my God, dude. Did they have to go through a bunch of tests to make because generally you eliminate the ones that you think of, right? I mean, like you don't jump right to a cancer

that basically people are here. What happened is I have Crohn's disease. So like my stomach attacks itself, it's kind of, and so I go to the doctors, and they did like all these blood type tests on me and whatever, and I came back perfectly fine on everything, and then they did an MRI, and they called me in, they're like,

dude, you need to get to the hospital right away. That was like, all right. Always, always good news when the dog got on the whole two toes to get the heartily aggro. Right away, you can't even get your ass off but a now bitch. So it's a tumor. It's not a tumor.

Yeah, it's a tumor that's 17 centimeters by like 14 centimeters by 10 or something. Do you have the mirror to this? It's like invaded my, my liver and spleen. Oh my god. When you drop that up, do you like, is there like a one-upsmanship that goes on in the, in the in tumor convos where you can drop that on? I'm like, oh yeah, well, I got a 17 centimeter tumor.

Yeah, I've just suck on that. I put my slab down. I'm just like, yeah, look at this. Oh, my God, dude, this is terrible. This is absolutely terrible. Have you gotten a second? How do you know this isn't like a Joe versus the volcano situation where the doctors, you know, they just pull it a fast one on me. Pulling a fast one. Yeah. Uh, because they need you to go to the volcano. I hope they're not, I hope they're not, uh, they wouldn't be a joke because they have keep us sucks. Oh, yeah, I can imagine.

Jesus Christ. So what are you, what are you going to do? What's the, what's the three month plan? I don't know what I do know if you, if you had a three month fucking? I don't know what I do know if you if you you had a three month fucking plan, what would they do? They gave you three months. Well, if I don't, if I don't take chemo, I do two to three months. Right. What if you do chemo give you? If I do, it's a 55% chance I could live for three years. Oh my God.

How'd it crazy? We need to get this guy laid a lot. Yeah, how's that? What's the... I have a girlfriend. She's amazing. She's been like helping out a lot. Okay, well that removes most of the things that I can do. Yeah, no, sorry dude.

Drugs and getting laid off. Shit man. Well, real hard sorry, dude. Drugs and getting laid off. Off. Shit, man. Well, real hard. Real sorry to hear that. Yeah, but it is, but it is, there's, there's a chance. It's not, it's there is a chance. Yeah, 15% is 15%. I would imagine they're fairly skeptical on that, you know, I would say they probably shoot on the low side, right? Is there a chance? Well, I go ahead. Well, there's only like 20 people a year that get this thing. So.

Yeah, very small sample size. Yeah. Yeah. Right. That's how the hell does it happen? Well, then you could completely screw the curve. Yeah. 20 people a year. Yeah. I mean, yeah. All of a sudden the survival rate skyrocketed he beats this and then the can't just like oh damn it Fucked up on that one again. It's not about bitch. Yeah, is there a few infuse with rage? Is there a chance? Yeah, is there a chance that you're gonna be taking out like a hundred thousand dollar loan and going to Vegas? I will That sounds like a hell of a recover or some bullshit get like some parasitic disease on top of it that life like crazy.

What would you do Sean man? I don't even know. I would say like spend time with my family but I mean So but you know that sounds nice but then like three or four days later my heart I gotta I gotta get out of here I haven't you guys You guys Yeah, that's what you're going through right now Chase. Yeah three or four days later, I'm like, all right, I gotta get out of here. I haven't, you guys, people are getting the kids. Yeah, that's what you're going through right now, Chase. Yeah, I'm pretty, I'm the loner, so it's just like that everyone's like coming in and being all like supportive. I'm like, I don't know how to deal with this.

My friends like you, they're both a deal with it. You're supposed to lean on it, man. I'm like, oh shit. I didn't give a shit at all. And then you gotta, you have to make them feel better. Yeah, right. Yeah. I would think. I mean, yeah. Yeah. Oh, obligated right to the fucking end.

Yeah. Straight to the grave. Yeah. Let's do it. Well, I don't know, buddy. Thanks for calling in. That's really heavy. Yeah. I agree with you. I hope I uplifted you guys in some way. I don't fucking know. I just want you have, you have full, like nobody else. You at least have the one ability for now until ever, to for anybody if they're talking about, like,

that a cure for cancer is being hidden or held back in some way. You can just haul off and hit them as hard as you can with anything you want for saying it. Because that somebody, somebody wrote in recently whose mom had passed away from cancer and they said that's what drove them insane more than anything else is hearing anybody say, well, they're just holding it back. You know, it's the corporations.

They're holding it back. Yeah. You know, it's the corporations. They're holding it back. And now you have, you have, you can take out as much rage as you could possibly ever fucking want over that. I'm just going to carry a small baseball bat with me around just like nail people that say that shit. Carry a glove too. That's why. Well, because you can't just have a baseball bat with you.

That's a weapon. You got a baseball bat in a baseball bat with you, that's a weapon. You got a baseball bat in a glove, but you're not. Yeah, we're going to pick up games. Look at me. Yeah, there's a lot of pick up baseball games out there. Right. It's like in the streets in New York when they come out and turn the fire hydrant on, like the old days and cool off after.

It's just a pick up baseball game. You're in a bat in a glove and around. Hey, guys, you got room for one more? Right here. Officer, I was playing a pick up game. This guy just walked right into it. Hey, listen, let me, let me pitch. I got three months left. Just to be honest, though, like I've been playing like, I played like board games and stuff and then as soon as I'm about to lose, I'm like, come on, I got cancer. What's your favorite working? It works. I trust you, guys. Dude, go to where do you live? Where in the country do you live? I live in Massachusetts.

Okay, so you're right. You know, go to like every fucking concert you can't and hit that as hard as possible. Every waterpark. It's cancer, cancer, cancer, co-ector. Yeah. Fourth of July. No, not guns and roses playing. Hey, can I get back there and meet Axel? I've got the, I don't even want to say it. It's so bad, but I think you know what I'm talking about. Here's my, here's a bunch of pictures of me. It's pretty close with Fer and the ear.

Yeah. I want to be on stage. I want to be wheeled out onto the stage. I want the full nine yards. At least once. At least once. wheeled out onto the stage. I want to full nine yards. At least once. At least once. All right, and call back in four months. Yeah, we'll see where I'm at, right?

Yeah, we believe in you. Thanks guys. All right, buddy, have a good one. Thanks. Oh, let's see if we can. So he wrote in and you thought it was a good idea to have him call in. Yeah, that's about right. What else can we do? Was he asking to call in and you thought it was a good idea to have him call in. Yeah, that's about right.

What else can we do? Was he asking to call in or you're like, no, that's, yeah, that's my point. What the hell are you supposed to do? He called in what he just said, I'm a long time listener. Yeah, long time your life. And you're like, I got three months to go, like I call in. Don't know what to do about that. Yeah.

Half a year anniversary, guys. All right. Cause like I don't know if it, like if it happened to me, I, I'd want to just bitch about it and not treat it so seriously for a little bit. I don't know if I'm alone in that, but like, I don't know, because I alone in that, but like, I don't know.

Cause I could imagine just the never ending, like every, every time you go out with any friends or family, it's just another fucking wake. Yeah. Yeah. So I don't know, I will at least we could do that. Yeah. At least he could talk about not enough couch co-op games,

which he's absolutely right. He's absolutely right. Yeah. He's absolutely right on. Kind of hard to follow that one. Yeah. I got some comments. Ryan Sutherland says is a dude who worked in Yellowstone National Park for a summer winter contract every ranger tells you do not use bear spray

99 times out of 100 it makes them more pissed at you. And you were more likely to get killed by the bear. Really? So do not use bear spray. Yeah, so we were right. It was coach and I were right. It was big bear spray. Trying to sell bear products.

Sean, never, never believe it. Just like seat belts, seat belts are an excuse to violate your fourth amendment. Sean, think about it. Who do they protect? Just you or can a cop pull up anywhere in America and say, oh, I pulled you over because it didn't look like you were wearing your seatbelt.

Is that an unlicensed firearm or some, do I smell weed? The whole, it's always a scam. All protective things are a scam. All of them, every single one, all of my clothing is made out of asbestos. Yeah. On principle.

Yeah. On principle. My act of wear is 100% asbestos because I don't believe it. I'd love to see like the tests and things on, because I mean, it makes sense that the bear spray would work. Why?

Is there a human spray that would work? What do you mean? Like, you always see the videos, the guys getting pepper sprayed and then still fighting the cops. Yeah. If I'm hungry, pepper sprays an appetite. Like, how will fucking eat your ass? Depends what they're on, though, too.

If you fucked up my diet, if you fuck up my diet coke and my coke, no, no spray on earth is going to keep me away from you. I don't know. Yeah, man. Yeah, no, true. I don't know. Yeah. Tom Jump Jr. says,

the bear spray turning coach into a bear that haunts the woods sounds like a German fairy tale. The Rookswich Laus barman, the reckless bear man. Uh oh. There you go. Got a little, uh, Greg Mallorch says, coach, I was, coach was talking about the nation of Islam, guys, so they don't like white guys.

And I'm sure you've gotten a bunch of stuff about this, but if not, I thought it was interesting enough to share the nation of Islam, thinks that white people are literal demons. Yeah. Made up by a black scientist named Yacoube. Same goes for the five percenters. They believe that, I didn't know that.

They're like a blue-eyed devil comes from? I don't know, but apparently they think all white people are demons made up by a black scientist. So I watch out for these guys. Should be pretty pissed at the black scientist. Yeah, a gucube. That's a name? Yeah, that's his name, a cube.

Cooking up demons. I've got a comment. This is from last week. Someone said, glad Sean's voice is better. And then someone commented and said, I'm not. For me, the ranking of Sean's voice goes, ghouls, Sean, cool, Sean, Sean Cux, high Sean, and then normal Sean, which is yet to be heard. All right, I got one, the one, the Philly Road Raid champ.

Are you on the line, buddy? Hey, man, what's going on? Not too much. One said he wanted to do the questions from Facebook because he liked that bit. So I said, yeah, I got, I mean, it kind of, everything else that you just kind of want to do gets approved. So why not?

Yes, yeah, I just, you know, assert yourself. You sound like shit, though, dude. Where are you? Not doing anything, it's complaining. Hey, you sound like you're inside of an AM radio. Give me a second. Let me switch over to this behind this curtain. He's an analog transistor demon. Yeah. Oh, shush.

Okay, I'm going to wrap myself in this curtain. Like the fan fan to the opera All right, okay, that's better. Not really say something talking Still sounds pretty bad. It's just all you know, you hear the alias thing. Yeah, try all right try one What's your what's a question that you got? Okay, well actually I have kind of a concept with these questions I've got a lot of seeing Facebook and Reddit fight each other all the time. We're all tired of the fighting Uh-huh, and I I took questions from both black and from water And I just fuse them so it's a forced collaboration Facebook and Reddit. Okay. It's like seeing two dudes bro down all the time and having someone from the vacuelle now kiss. Yeah. So got here from Ray Janderson and Scott Kelly.

Who is your favorite founding father and would you do butt stuff with? Would I do butt stuff with Thomas Jefferson? Yeah. No. Oh, that's your favorite. Yeah. That's my favorite. You're two. Yeah. Why? Me too. Because he's the smartest man to ever inhabit the White House or get anywhere near it. Yeah. I like him because it seems like he's, he's got this attitude of where if you think like if you say something's good, it's not good. Like he's always got his sober you up.

Like people like democracy, it's the land of the. And he goes, it's just, it's, it's just the best form of government we have. Correct. There's nothing, don't, don't think it's great. It's just the best thing that we can. He is exactly right. Yeah. And Churchill appropriated that quote,

you know, it's a democracy is the worst form of government on earth except for all the others. Yeah. That's what I like about him. No, I wouldn't do butt stuff with them. Yeah, look at you. What about you, man, Keke, cause you're favorite. Well, these are questions for both Reddit and Facebook,

so if you can guess which ones from where. Yeah, I got it. I think you're, I think you're destiny yourself. I've got one. Okay, one's the next one. I've got one from Svelfoust and McGregor, Alexander. This is another collaboration. Since the Dixia was dying because it can only afford Mexican labor, when will Sean be returning

to Madcast Media? Oh, yeah, I got a bet with somebody that you'll never be back there, that you, Sean, will never be back there. Right when the first episode that you left there, somebody was like, oh, Sean will be back in six months, so I said, want a bet. That's my thing now. I just bet if anybody runs their mouth, I just bet. Like, what's the point of arguing anything?

Like whatever, like, I'll bet you. Somebody on Twitter says, because it's gonna turn out how it turns out. Yeah, so somebody on Twitter was like, just wait and see. Are you worried about Trump getting impeached? And I was like, no. And I'm like, well, you know, they're saying

he's gonna be impeached. He's like, what, want a bet? I'll bet you. And he's like, oh, I don't know about that. I was like, well, then don't they're saying he's gonna be impeached. He's like, what, wanna bet? I'll bet you and he's like, oh, I don't know about that. I'm like, well then don't waste my time. Don't waste my time. Who was part of that? Is that no one ever gets to the actual betting phase? They just push the app before you even put anything up.

Yeah. So nobody ever wants to see like, all right, I'll put five bucks on it or something, it's bullshit. Yeah. All right, buddy. That's enough of malgamated questions for this one. I'm gonna play some voicemails. Get back to work.

Thanks. I hope you have the sash on right now. Okay, everybody. This has been the Dicks show. Oh, Chase has a go fund meme. I'm posted on the. Of course. Yeah.

That's what I told him. Dustin was telling me, well, you got to mention the, I'm like, I don't know, man, I don't, I guess as much as many people hate that there's going to be a couple who supported. So it's worth it. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. You can go fund me for like, terminally ill friends and family. Yeah. Yeah. How did they, did they make it? I mean, the one the most recent one is like working towards a stable condition, but probably never will be able to work again.

Oh. And then not so, not so lucky ones. Did you get anything back? No, they don't split up the remainder. Fuckin' go fun, me money. Yeah. And it's always like, oh, this is for my family to pay, to pay the, you can't do your own. Someone has to make one for you. That's what makes it okay.

And then it's like, it's not for me. It's for my family to help pay for X, Y, and Z, my medical bills, but like other shit. Yeah, okay. Well, he's got to go find me all the way. I hope we're not funding Walter White. I'm just going. I meant to ask, I'm like, what, what would he want to do? In three months? Yeah, like,, like, what would he want to do in three months?

Yeah, like, I mean, what would he want to do? That's the, I mean, that's what, like, a go-fun may should be for, shouldn't it? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's, like, I'm going to, it should be like, I need, I got three months left to live, I'm pulling a full-on Pelican brief on everybody, I'm taking down every Supreme Court justice and doing do an American. Where do you want to go?

Where do you want to go? What do you want to do? Or yours, that's just as good. I don't know. I hate hearing that shit. I really do. Why? Cause it's depressing.

Well, it just reinforces. It's like, oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Just you can get more fucked than you can ever imagine. Yeah. Like in this world for no reason, you know. It's just, that's, that's, meanwhile people are drinking their brains out. Oh yeah.

Every night living as unhealthily as possible, going around in a hover round scooter at 600 pounds. Picture as fucked as you think you can get and you can get more fucked than that. Yeah. Oh. All right, this has been the Dix show. Check out Madcucks, Patreon.com slash Madcucks.

He's got his book coming out. We didn't even talk about your book. He's the best book in the universe. He was working on it in the morning. I hear him chuckling to himself down in the dressing room. Oh good. What are you on K now? I'm working on K right now. So the book's going to be the alphabet book. Yes. With some little, a little bit of extra content. Like numbers? No, well, maybe numbers. Yeah, you should do the alphabet of socially conscious justice or whatever it is,

and then also the numbers of socially conscious justice after that, zero through nine, or maybe just made up numbers, seven, like six million. Dekelda. Oh, just, just a range of numbers throughout the. Six million, the number of girls who need to be in STEM careers. And I got a little twist.

Thought I was going to be something else, but it was, yeah. Also, uh, the co-opted. I host, I now co-host, uh, here's what I don't get with Uncle Buck, the Joel and Joel Chaco. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Last week was, uh, I brought in Star Trek Discovery and you got to see me go full-blown nuclear rage. Yeah. Yeah. Last week was, I brought in Star Trek Discovery

and you got to see me go full-blown nuclear rage. Oh, wow. Yeah. Screaming into a packed theater of people behind me. No, there was nobody in the theater, but I was just shouting. I was just shouting. Some larping.

All right, this, this closing tune, closing tune is by Alex Walker Smith. And we're going to do some voice mails after that. I get to let us challenge update. Oh, yeah. And low-tech, something some Tammy, we love your laughs too. Maybe I'll save him for next week. I'm going to do a little bit of the same. He's so good. Somebody said you guys should play one of these at a show.

Not that fucking good. He can't play that shit. You kidding me? I'm going to play this on my best day. Duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh Dude, skidrun to the ta ta ta. Did everybody tell you about the proudest musical moment of my life? I'm not sure. How was it this black jazz club in Chicago? I mean, a jazz, excuse me. I was at a jazz club in Chicago, but it was all,

it was everybody was black. Yeah. Black band up there was fucking great, right? That was fucking great. That was great. It felt, it was like a real jazz experience. Like a lot of times you go to see maybe just us, you go to a jazz bar,

her jazz quartet plan and it's like a bunch of music students and they're trying to add their own silly twist on it but there's no soul in it. That's why I feel about seeing jazz in LA. In Chicago it was this jazz and blues bar and these guys were fucking nailing it, man. Plus I was nice. I was the perfect amount of toasty.

Like I had landed right, that landed that jet right on the liquor aircraft, the USS liquor. You know, there's like that, and you're like, ah, the liquor and me have merged into one. Now I feel the liquor for us all around me. It was one of those nights. Sometimes you fight it, you wrestle around with the the liquor. Those are great me. It was one of those nights. Sometimes you fight it, you wrestle around with the the great nights.

Yeah, those are great nights. Just flowing through you. I was really, yes. Yes, I got it. I felt, man, I'm not fooling myself. Yeah, yeah, because other people are digging my liquor vibe too. They're like, yeah, yeah, this guy's on the liquor tonight. Yep, so I go in there.

I'll never say it was all bad. No, no, no, no. I go in there and the next act is showing off at the at the jazz club. And he goes, all right, everybody, we're going to do a do some like Colin respond, right? And he's like, rebe deep, that do about me. Everybody. Everybody's like doing all like, everybody, everybody's like, that I'm that dude. But I don't like, rebe deep, that I'm that dude. But I need he's like doing all like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like,

everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like,

everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like,

everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like, everybody's like and I'm like, I got a good memory for scatting for some reason because it's the most annoying kind of music. So I got a great retorting. I got really good, like whistling and scatting I can do because everybody fucking hates both of them. So I'm like, ribbit it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it,

it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, doing my little thing with my two, probably a bottle of liquor and a glass of whiskey and I finish it and realize that I'm the only one doing it, like wriggling around and my seat and acting like a total asshole. And there's this, I open my eyes and I'm like, oh, whoops. And there's this, there's this, there's this, there's this black, big black woman looking like she just got out of church. It was like one thirty in the morning, but you know,

she's got a big old fascinating or like a pink, a pink outfit on. And she just goes, damn, like, yeah, answers. Yeah, baby, that was for you. Yeah. Like, she knows it. She's only fucking honest one here. This woman, and she just said, damn, fuck you guys, I'm outta here. And that's when the liquor went,

I quantum leaped with liquor. I like, bleh bleh bleh bleh bleh. I leaked right out of my body. Does it most, I've never been more proud of myself in that moment? Let's see here. Hi guys, this is Dan from Seattle. I called on the old show after Sean's problem, which some tell me to to go to rehab. And like a last show, I just didn't make it. But I'm calling. You remember that guy who called in and said, you're from them, made him go to rehab? Yeah, yeah, I didn't work.

The call to the analytics is podcast. And as long as I've been in analytics, bought his books, bought with four of the old podcasts and whatnot, that show has become absolutely unlustinable. His pedantic and myopic rhetoric is born as all holy hell and he surrounds himself with people that are just a more extreme version of him and the only person he ruckus on that show that has a common point. It sounds like an avatar full of retarded children in the back of a school bus. It's like a pretty cruel pursuit in all climbers

home. It's absolutely terrible. So for the celebrity pool I'd like to put down nattics and I like to put down it's going to end with a gun in this mouth. I just brought it up. To not be able to control certain situations and freaking out and having certain expectations of people they're not letting up with expectations and drinking and drugging. So no one in their right mind consisting of life very much longer with that kind of mentality. So thanks guys and dig in serious. See you in the rehab.

Oh, rehab didn't work out for that. Okay. Sean, we thought that your problem made a difference in somebody's life, but it didn't. Oh, you know, I'm glad that you waited a year to let you know. Dick, I started taking hormones to become a woman yesterday. Today, I gasped about the mustard, maybe slightly falling onto my own table. No.

Or what? Gas. Oh well, I guess that's what I've found out for. That's already one day. Oh well, let the show have a go on. Do you believe that that guy's on hormone replacement therapy? No. No.

People were about his voice. Then his voice sounded a little like maybe he was on HRTs One day Well, just that like, you know, I think it was a joke. You think that was a joke. I believe it. No, I don't know Yeah, who knows people don't call into the show to lie Yeah, people do that call into the show on the internet lie about it come on Hey dick, this is Max with the Silver Hammer Kimble and I'm just wondering if you have any advice to help aid with the fact that I gotta go prog that. Thanks, Dick. Please help me. I don't want to kill myself.

It's got a barrier. So yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I mean, that'll fix everything. He lives in the South, right? Oh, does he? I think so. All I know about him is that he's got a gigantic Israeli flag behind him. And that he's a kid.

He said, when I said that I wanted high school girls to react to the, to Maddox's breakup letter, he said he would do it because he just graduated high school. Yeah, it kind of depends on how hot he is, Maxwell. So my thinking is, should have kept up with that podcast with Clegg, the way that the girls, the Clegg, like, you know, the butterfly effect, where the tiniest change can have a heat like, at some point in his life, his interactions with Clegg changed his future plans. And now, with girls, so because of David Clegg, Maxwell, the Silver Hammer,

got a girl pregnant. Poor guy. Do a go-fun me, I guess. Start thinking up names. Mad Cux, that's a great name. Name. Right. Name a kid that's silver hammer.

Poor guy. Hey, Dick, this is Andrew from Eugen Organ's life. You know what phrase I'm really fucking sick of? Is empowered woman. Like, oh, we're celebrating empowered woman. Like, what the fuck does that even mean? Empower to do what? Just because they accomplished something. Keep talking.

Really? It's kind of delitling. Like, oh, like, that's so nice. mean empowered to do what just because they accomplished something really it's not a little late like all of that so nice that you're a woman you accomplish on the year empowered like gold star good for you like why can't it just be like awesome congratulations why does it have to be only that you're an empowered woman fucking stupid uh... she called back

well with her Last message You don't ever hear somebody saying empowered man Like when a man accomplishes something like he built a goddamn railroad you don't hear like oh man That was such an empowered man built that railroad No, you're like that was a successful man that built that fucking railroad. I'm in building lots of railroads still I say that was yeah, I said that fucking railroad. I meant build lots of railroad still. I'd say that was, yeah, I'd probably say that was slave labor. You know what I'm saying?

It was the least franchise to power man on the planet. Built that railroad. There is a man with no power whatsoever. I got to build that railroad, no power, none. We should start using it though. Be empowered, men. Yeah, together. Trump's really empowered.

Yeah, I feel empowered right now. I don't think we can. It's not catching. I don't think we can steal it. Like we can't take back those terms. Like empowered. They're two, they're two, like I can't say it with a straight face, you know? Yeah.

People who like take back words, take things very seriously, and I just don't. Like I just kinda talk, and then someone will say, well did you mean this, and I'll go, who said that? You. I'm like, I don't know. Why do you care? Have you seen the new Twitter out of context, Dick?

Yeah, I think it's Dick OOC at Twitter, and it's just out of good, like snippets of things Dick said on the show that are said, like, that's gotta be hilarious. Four people are gonna die right now, as this is like one of the two. That sounds like when you were talking about getting pulled off the airplane.

Okay, here's something. Yeah, I think this is for sure. Most ideas are shit. Yeah. I think this is for you. Most ideas are shit. These are quotes that I've said. I'm a toxic man. Pretty much all of Henry Ford's thinking I applied a woman. When the hell did I say that?

That's good. I'm past the point of wherewithal, where I should be accountable for knowing that this is entirely liquor. Yeah, I agree. I know what I'm saying there. We need to find a stereos and dissect it. I love that one. All four of you are going to die. Yeah. Yeah, that's funny. Propel pictures pretty great too. Yeah. That's me doing Samuel Jackson. Yeah, that's me doing Samuel Jackson. No, I know.

You kind of look like a black dude from this angle. From the waist down, you mean that angle? Well, penis. All right. Let me play a Letus Jones email. Okay. Because we haven't heard from a while, but. Oh, no.

So you were involved, Mad Cooks, you're involved in Letus Jones' voice mails, right? Oh, he fucked it up. Oh, no. Apparently all these fucking guys were sending them to Astarios and Astarios never said one thing. No, never. Over the past three or four months. Well, yeah, so there was there was this discussion I sent in the first few and then to me, to you, yeah, and then another one got posted and I was like, okay, I'm gonna send this. And on the one I got, there was a message just for a stereos in that one that I used. I'm like, well, I'm not gonna, I mean,

ask water boy, I take stuff and put it up. So if I get access to it, I'll take it. So I get, I see the, it comes in and I'm like, okay, I'm gonna send this in. And then one of the other guys goes, and no, I already sent it to him, meaning a stereos, not dick. And I was like, oh, are'm gonna send this in. And then one of the other guys goes, and no, I already sent it to him. Meaning a stereos, not dick. And I was like, oh, are you just gonna send him from now?

I was like, yeah, I'll take care of it. So a stereos fucking stole all the lotta Sean's voice mails. Yeah, and then a couple weeks ago, someone was like, I haven't heard dick play these on the show. Have you been sending them in? Like, what do we mean if I've been sending them in?

I thought you were sending them in. So we all fucked them. The guy asked us to do two fucking things and we got half of it wrong. Oh, I look like a bunch of dumb assholes. His one connection to the outside world like oh have you been did your husband write you any letters from Iwo Jima? Well yeah but Mad Cux and his all of his friends just threw him in the garbage. They just threw him out.

They were all recognized, didn't recognize the sender address. Yeah. They all thought each other did it. So they just threw him in the incinerator. Nobody wants to get something twice. Right. Yeah.

All right, well, here's real asshole. Here's the most recent one. Lots happened in lettuce life. So I don't really understand it, but here it is. Hey, okay, so, the last challenge calling it from St. Louis County jail. So, sorry, so I'm talking to my lawyer about a possible early release,

like I said before, latest LP here is September. I don't know if I said that or not before, but latest LP here in September. But I may, you know, July 1st early, that's the date, that's the date of my lawyer's death. So, I hope that the other year, I will live in London. Well, that's bad. But, you know, this thing is though, like everything my lawyer is thinking,

I can't really like trusting in that. Let's go now. Because, well, that's my rate this week, OK? It's mainly lawyers. Because when I first got jailed, you know, I was debating whether I should even get out or not. So, I was like, well, I'm probably going to have to serve pretty decent amount of time. So I might as well just stay here and get over with now. But I was told, or at least he called my dad, you know,

how to rest, right, which is what I was on for a year. He's saying, oh, yeah, I'll count of time. And when I first heard of that, I was like, you know, I can't believe this. Like, you know, just being in your house with an ankle bracelet, the name is being in jail. So I looked it up online. I couldn't find anything supporting board that I needed, you know, being in a house arrest.

I have the time served with the call time served. And so then eventually, so I feel like six months or so being on house arrest. I asked my lawyer and just make sure. And he was like, oh no, no, I didn't on house arrest. I asked my lawyer and I just make sure. And he was like, oh no, I didn't count it all. I was like, what the fuck? You were just like, I spent three hours a month.

I can't leave my house, you know what I'm saying? I can't leave my house that's like working so. Oh no, it doesn't count at all. So, you know, I could, you stayed at jail, but that's, one good thing. One thing that's alright is that, you know, I was able to call on a dictionary, which I wouldn't be able to do, you know, so... Not that it matters, because nobody's sending us the voice mails.

I guess that's one. I wouldn't be talking to you now, but never got out of the road. But, you know, I simply just assumed that, you know, lawyers, they basically would, I always assume they would tell you, like, worst situation, what you actually get, you know, so that they tell you, like, two years, if they tell you, you get one year, so the fact that you get the one year, you're like, well, shit, that's not so bad, you know, that, uh, my lawyer must really help me out, you know, but that's just what I've been so much of nothing about the law or any of this shit. But also, man, when I first went in on January 6th, my lawyer said, like, oh, yeah, after three or four months left for early release, I was thinking, well, shit, you know, I had already done almost a month, so I was like, you know, I might get out and it's a little two months, you know. And then as soon as I go, as soon as I show up record, he's like, oh no, I'm a spoke, I'm a spoke. So, you know, and then now I'm probably just gonna end up spending the full night month. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha We're early release two months. Oh awesome. Hey remember what you told me about the two months. Oh

No Not happening. Oh god the fucking law. How old is that voicemail? A month yeah, he has that we actually haven't heard from him for a couple weeks. Uh-oh Not us fucking up It has really no way to tell Not us fucking up. No, it hasn't, I guess it's really not way to tell it. I don't believe it. He's not posted.

All right, I got one more from Matt Barr. He sent this in. You remember Matt Barr? He's the guy that originally challenged Matt X's Street Fighter. Yeah, yeah, I do. Okay. Hey, Dick, this is Matt Barr, aka the Street Fighter Challenger from the old show.

You know, it's been two years since I challenged Maddox, and I'm starting to think your former co-host isn't going to get back to me. I guess he was too busy making shitty 3D Sonicery destroyin' the successful podcast. And apparently he's writing a book about fucking fat chicks, whatever. a book about fucking fat chicks, whatever. Seeing as you got a shiny new Twitch stream, I challenge you, Dick Masterson, to Street Fighter IV. I told him to leave a voice man. First day of matches is the winner.

Now, how's this for stakes? You with the extra mile. When I win, you gotta take me on the LA Breaking Bad Tour. And if by some miracle you win, I will record myself eating a copy of your book and post a video of myself doing so on Reddit. These stakes are negotiable. I only ask that you don't push out. Because I'm not taking you on a breaking bad team. Call back when you have cancer.

One last thing. I want to take down Mad Cucks at Street Fighter Alpha 2 at the Chicago live show. He must pay for the sins of his Armenian doppelganger so long and go fuck yourself. I like that he went to the extra mile. He really did. Put in the the echo, the reverb, the backing track. We need different stakes though. It was not going to work. I told him that I'd fight him.

I told him that I would fulfill Georgia's obligation to fight him at Chicago, when there's the Chicago live road rage, we'll do it live. Oh, okay. I mean, maybe we should do it, maybe we should both do it live then. Yeah.

Because then we could like... I mean, you should fight the winner. I mean, I could do that. Are you good at street fighter? Oh, yeah, absolutely. Okay, you should fight the winner of us then. I'm a master. I'm a master street fighter. But we could put it up on a projection screen or whatever that way. We could see the genius of my Hadookins Hadookins. Yeah. All right. Matt, you're on. See if I got anything. Speaking of fighting, what about a stereos and the Donald guy? I see. Is he on? I mean, I if I got anything in it. Speaking of fighting, what about a stereos and the Donald guy? Can you see, is he on? I mean, I haven't heard anything about that.

Well, Haas and Cruz put together some stuff on them. A touch screen. Do you wanna hear that? I have audio. Because he interviewed both of them or what? Yeah, I was just kind of throwing that out there We didn't talk about it last week now because there's there's fuckery going on Oh around it and it's either gonna be very funny or It's gonna completely turn into nothing. Oh, and I don't I don't see how exactly shaking out yet

So I'm waiting for like both guys have gone silent about it. Oh, okay, which is always suspicious. Oh, like they're colluding. Are they gonna launch a podcast together? Yeah Welcome to a Stereo's what would it be like like boxing day with the stereo's and war to the fanboys. Yeah, he's not around I guess not I can I'll. I'll play Housing Cruises. Oh shit, Yancy says, I missed the beginning, but I heard Hayden Blades got credit for my bottle of red breath.

Hashtag dick lies. Uh oh. Oh. Yeah, he did. He did. God dammit. It was Yancy that gave it to me. Sorry.

I fucked up too. I called the artist Chris Pratsky last week. And it's Felipe. Yeah. Pratsky. And I know that guy that sounds similar to that. OK, here's Housen Crews' presentation on the fight. Oh. It's the fight everyone's talking about.

No, this, uh, here's the stereospeller. He's a Greek fella. He's got Zeus on his side so I might throw a lightning bolt. Sinking Greek, sinking Greek. But how is the stereos, the blob sneaky Greek Ducac do caucus coconose planning on winning this fight exactly? Will he take Dixieq Vice and train for it or will he do the exact opposite and eat heroes and Paki until he inevitably Explodes Goss grots own has and crews caught up with the coconut himself about the allegations that he was trying to push out and this is What he said. let him do it i'm sorry that you can't get laid i'm sorry that you're not friends with dick and i am i'm sorry about your whole stupid life if you hate me

that much that you're going to go after me on a red it a stereos went on to tell us that in addition to there being zero chance that he would push out there would also be a one hundred percent chance that his opponent wouldn't show here's what could happen this guy's not going to show and i feel really really bad for all the people they were hyping up for this fight because this guy's a coward, he's not gonna show up, he's an internet tough guy. I apologize in advance for everybody that wants to be a great fight. What do you do? I want to be a great fight too. But there's no way this guy

shows up because he's too big of a pussy. But is it a stereosis Greek bloodline that lends him the confidence that we've seen since the gauntlet was thrown down Plus you got that like herculean strength behind you too that Greek heritage Herculee survived eight trials. I only have to survive one and I wouldn't even call it a trial It's gonna be a walk in the goddamn part But this is one trial that claims to happen. The guy doesn't even know it's I'm a mystery. I

Guys he's counting every time he fought the then he fight the lions more than once or something like that? I don't remember what they were. I just remember that there was a number. 10. I was very good. It's so. Maybe he doesn't count cleaning out the Aegean's tables. Like I wasn't a try.

That was it. Bristchen God on his side. He's told me he has angels on his side. I'm sorry that he can't make that entertaining because I kind of hate that I'm the only entertaining person in this. What the fuck is going on in the background? Is there somebody who's coming in on Discord right now? I don't think so. Is something open? No.

This is just, this is what they're, this is where they are. This is where they're recording. Oh, the angel will fill it up again. Yeah, see that's 50 more times. maybe you'll get plenty to fifty first time nobody writes a second from the fine novel is that at one point weren't trying to be funny but word on the street is that a stereosis tried to change the conditions of the fight after the challenge was accepted when asked about the rumors that he was calling for his own fans to dox

were of the fanboys a stereos clarified with this statement I'm not taking the conditions of shit It sounds like you've gone into the spin of fucking conservative haters who don't like the idea that I'm gonna make their hero cry like a bitch Alright, here's what I say That's part of the coming fight with War the fanboys is That War the fanboys is gonna have to give up his real name before the fight For once, I'll be dox in someone else that's a joke

and it's not funny no but i can't stop the time for being associated with the big show just the other day that's a girlfriend's release my facebook messages mad at my text all around lots and i got mad media get my employer's microchrist to get the fire is not getting that because my employer is a microchrist. I'm getting close to five. I'm getting back to every goddamn day.

Because this guy tells me to fight when he steps in the ring. Everyone's gonna know who he is. Isn't that funny? So you're not asking for people to find his information. You're saying once he shows up at the ring, everybody's just gonna know who he is. Well, because it never even occurred to me that anonymously boxing someone was an option but if this guy

doesn't have the guts to stand behind his internet bullshit you can show up name whatever they want call yourself or or the fuck with show up in a fucking green paper and ask where what you want don't wear what you want show up pre sale of tickets for sneaky Greek versus cacestani are now available at patreon.com slash hysteria. No, they're now I mean he said he did say That he was excited about war the fanboys getting his name So he could expose him as a transphobia his friends, and I think that's what he said Do you remember it? Did hazing crews just say his name so he could expose him as a transphobe to his friends. And I think that's what he said.

Do you remember it? Did Haas and Cruz just say his name at the end of that? Did he? Let me see when? Who's name? Oh, he said it's duro. The ticket to his bureau. It's versus something.

It's something like Stan something. This is Chip Chiply for Gus Quatsy and T news. Chip Chiply. I said, hey, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no Now available. Kekistanie. Kekistanie. That's what they invented a fake country for Trump people. All right. We've gone on way too long.