The Dogg Zzone by 1900HOTDOG - Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 19, Hot Dog Nights: Megan Wants a Millionaire, Episode 5

Episode Date: April 21, 2021

Seanbaby and Brockway take a lavish boat ride with Lydia Bugg, where they discuss the final episode of Megan Wants A Millionaire - the reality show with at least one secret murderer! Brockway makes his final accusation, and we find out if he's right, or if it doesn't matter because this happened 12 years ago.

One nine hundred hot dog. Hot dog. One nine hundred hot dog. Hot dog. Out of podcast slams with maximum hype. Say hot dog podcast word. Yeah. Yeah.

When you taste that nitrate power you're in the dog zone for an hour. Come on. You know the number. One nine hundred. One nine hundred hot dog. One nine hundred hot dog. One nine hundred hot dog.

One nine hundred. One nine hundred hot dog. One nine zero zero zero. Yeah. Nine thousand. Welcome to the dog zone nine thousand. The official podcast of one nine hundred hot dog dot com.

Comedy hilarity website. I'm TV Sean baby from the internet. And with me is my comedy partner hers. Rockway and Liddy. Welcome to both of you. Yay. We're bringing such strange energy.

We're bringing like candle energy. And we have a special fourth guest in the studio. It's the star of Megan wants a millionaire. Cory. We are Cory. Being piloted by the Space Mold.

I love your fun guest Cory because it has programmed me to love it. I love Cory. Cory find me water. We're all Cory now. We always find water. Every single one of us is Cory. Oh no.

Something's gone horribly wrong. I surprised them with this bit. We should have decided ahead of time one of us was going to do the we are Cory bit. So Lydia our weekly columnist would you like to take us through episode five of Megan wants a millionaire

to be edited. And final show the only one they ever finished editing. Take us through the plot. I would like literally nothing more than that to tell you what happened this episode. I was stressed about it all week. I was like sitting up at night like what is going to

because I thought they were going to have to up the ante from last week which was the most insane impossible. Yeah. But they didn't up the ante but it was still very good as usual. In a way it was perfect for our conditions like

Rock was trying to find the murderer and this the thing that they did seems designed almost specifically to expose truths. Yeah. It's like a pressure cooker and they were really turning out to see this episode. It was psychological warfare. Last episode

was actual warfare. And now it's a battle of the minds which they were not fully equipped to do. So it taught me a lot. I feel like I've learned a lot on my hunt. Yeah. I think you have all the tools you need because basically the entire episode was the producers putting the men together

and then just being like fight, fight, fight, fight, fight. Literally the first competition was just you guys get to make fun of each other. Have to. Have to make fun of each other. It's not quite a comedy roast. It sort of had this

I don't know the theme of a comedy roast but they gave everyone paper masks to wear of the other contestants. Which we were like thank God because if they had to make their own outfits we knew that was going to go poorly for them. Right. Well the one that I hesitate to say the elephant

in the room but it's Punisher is the one black guy. Right. We all saw that too. The moment they announced this we're all like oh no. Yeah. Somebody's going to get Punisher. This is going to go bad. And if it's not Francisco the only other minority

it's going to be super racist. It's Canadian. Yeah. So it was Francisco. The producers rigged that. They're like no you cannot give this to David. You can't give it to David. He's going to say the N word right up top. He's going to open with it.

Yeah I shudder to think but like Ryan or David or Al any of them so many poor choices there would have done with Punisher. But they did give Francisco to one of the white guys. It's literally all the other guys. And he held it up and

the only clip they showed was him saying hi I'm Francisco I'm Cuban I'm half Cuban half Puerto Rican and then they cut away. Smash cut. I have no idea where that was going but I don't think that dude knew any good Cuban Puerto Rican cultural stereotypes.

And in 2009 you could have gotten away with a lot there so when they cut from that you know that everybody in that room was like yeah. He was not going to say I score 7% higher on the writing portion of the SATs like no no no no.

Yeah and that guy I believe I forget who had him exactly but I believe that guy disappeared for the rest of the episode whoever it was was not prominently Was that Big Mike? No that wasn't Big Mike. Was it Big Mike? I thought Big Mike got somebody else. Corey the fungus had Big Mike

and he wore a big shirt. He wore I believe it was actually Big Mike's shirt. I think that one. Where else would they get that? He's like hey yeah you can make fun of me. Here wear one of my giant shirts it would be hilarious. It was not. Yeah well it's funny too because

Corey usually wears kind of big clothes anyway so he was just wearing this really big shirt and it was like is he being Big Mike or is that just his shirt for the night or has he taken this one step too far? Did he go shopping? Is that like his night shirt? Where did he get the giant shirt?

I know every one of your suits is the suit from Stop Making Sense but this is a little much. What's so great about this when you're trying to find a murderer is murderers love to wear other men's faces Yeah this was such a situational killer situation.

And it also sort of was very revealing as to what they found ridiculous about other humans. Like they're like this guy's like hey what's notable about me is I'm Cuban and Puerto Rican and then you're like okay that guy's a racist and one of them's like oh hey

I'm not gonna carve feet off a woman what a weird thing to do and you're like okay that guy carves feet off of women. Suspicious, that's very suspicious, yeah. David, I recognize that instantly as David. And this did start kind of a rivalry because

Canadian Mike or Canadian Ryan he got lipless Al and immediately went to the gay stuff. He's like oh hi I'm Al and I'm a giant homo I love to have sex with dudes and we're like says the guy with the I'm straight shirt.

The guy with the I'm straight shirt. Weird for him to go straight to the gay stuff. Yeah it was Mr. I'm straight and the only ammo he had was this guy must be gay. Right away. But then he went just like the same similar cheap insults like I'm a dummy and I

don't know what's going on. I want to buy Megan things like a lot of stuff that you know he doesn't really know this guy so it's hard to make fun of him but the guy got fucking pissed like lipless Al is like how dare he. How very dare you sir. And it started a really like kind of a bitchy cat fight

for the entire episode where they were they sort of hinted at physical aggression but never got past the point of like no no you're a poopy head and they swatter on each other. They would be very familiar to anyone who watches those types of shows really sort of walk around each other

and like insult each other and kind of like move their bodies like they're gonna fight but they don't they're just like like two ostriches circling each other at a zoo like moving their heads around. Let's let's style this back before we get to the actual culmination of the fight.

Dialing back before this competition to open the show it was it was them at odds right so they were already kind of bickering and fighting and when the competition came they got each other. So they had to each hold up a little plaque

of the other's faces which is no Al didn't use Ryan someone else got Ryan because he remember Al saying well I'm glad that they said that he's insecure because that's like what I think about you're right so it was only him that got Ryan like they targeted the bully and were like here go nuts

and Ryan took it really well he was just like I'm not insecure which was like oh right not expected that's all those guys' weak spot except for probably Punisher does not strike me as an insecure man. Yeah nobody's coming up

and doing a Punisher impression being like I'm so insecure with my body I can't even do the worm from like 45 feet in the air I can't drop from the fourth story into a worm and then mix a martini in my ass. I would have gone for the if I

had Punisher I would have gone for the birthmark on his tummy that Megan found completely disgusting Oh that's brutal. That's crazy nobody brought that up though because she hated it she would laugh so hard you're like I was born with a slight physical defect Megan would be like

That's the other thing though 50% of these guys are trying to murder each other's feelings and just make each other cry and then 50% are not trying at all and those are the two types that was definitely the theme of the show is like because two guys

let's see Cory does not give a shit they because he won right? Cory's brain is not capable of giving a shit anymore it has been devoured by the fungus that pilots Cory right and we are Cory yes thank you Cory for being here

he already infected Megan so they've made out she's infected he's done it's a great bit we don't usually do like improv comedy bits that was a pretty good bit she did bring her to water again because that's his one move one move she likes the water one time

I think we're somehow almost skipping over the questions part we skipped over the fight also we're skipping over so much it's so hard to do this we're not trained for this you need a professional and Brockway is still trying to find the murderer

so we're dealing with that and the questions part is like because that's where we actually learn things about these people and all of the things we learned were horrifying none of these guys are good when you like dig into their past

well let's get the obvious out of the way right away it was big mic surf prison time who didn't assume that when big mic walked in the door but it must have been something pretty benign if he's on the show because these were vetted obviously not well vetted because there was a murderer but because of the details of that

there was a guy that said on his website like I'm just here to hawk my porn nobody vetted these guys not really vetted no I would beg to differ with that you let a parasitic fungus from space on the show if you even ran a UV light

he would be disqualified completely so there was a setup to the questions where Dave the foot collector was talking to Punisher on the couch and he was like dude Dave was like man when I go home I'm going to get so much ass from this show

women are going to see me on TV and I'm going to fucking have poontang everywhere because he wanted so badly to impress Punisher that's all he wanted more than Megan he was willing to risk Megan just for Punisher to be like you're pretty cool for a white guy which didn't happen

no Punisher was not at all impressed rightfully because that's not true as a woman let me say I don't know a lot of women that are like women on TV drenched in water and crying and all of a sudden this man fail at every basic task

he's ever done and then quit and sob yeah just quit everything which I love as a woman which really just speaks to me the delusion he's walking around so Punisher he's like

talks about the importance of sexual chemistry this is the conversation Dave started and Dave's like well you've probably been with hundreds of women and Punisher just goes hell yeah so both these guys feel like they've had ammunition they're like ha ha now I know that you're just here

for other women and they're guys like ha ha you have a very adventurous sexual past didn't you say like 500 women I think he said hundreds but then later he wrote a question during the question writing section where the 500 was what

he landed on that was his question was is it true you've slept with more than 500 women and he was just like yeah whatever sounds about right hell yeah than the soldiers that attacked Sparta in the hit film

300 I would have fucked all them gentlemen easy a bigger army I fucked a bigger army than that now I put in some good numbers when I was single but I think 500 is approaching the number where you can sort of judge

a person's character by that like if you've had sex with 500 women and none of them were like interesting or good enough to date like you're well he's also a male stripper that is on this show for being a millionaire I think we can put two and two together why he starts with more

than fuck one point yes we understand that so yeah I'm not disputing it at all he's a classic gigolo he's doing what 3-4 gigs a week like you can get to 500 obviously within a year like that's just a very busy year for a gigolo

so maybe that's what we're dealing with if that's casual dating like I feel like there must be something wrong with him yeah that would be weird but again it's not his number he just said like 100 right yes he never like landed on the number

he even said to Megan like he doesn't know once it gets past 50 who could possibly keep track which is actually much more normal like who counts at a certain point if you're having that much sex right like right I mean like we're all there we're all in that boat like none of us have any idea like anything over

2 for me is like I don't even keep track stop keeping track do you count hand stuff I mean 3 what is even 3 4 and if we're counting butt stuff oh my god we gotta add a couple of magnitudes to this number so anyway these guys are armed with this knowledge and they go into

the next round we're not only do they wear the other men's faces they give questions to Megan to ask the other men and so they're all trying to like gotcha and the best they could come up with for TJ who he used to call the handsome man but now we know his name the non entity is what I've always called him TJ

is the non entity he does not exist I said he's like the vision he's like an organic robot person yeah he's yeah he's not see even we remember Corey for how much he is a fungus from space right so it's not that he's inhuman it's just

that he's nothing it's just that he is the horizon he's like sure he's a flat line that goes on forever he could kill but the responsibility would be spread across millions of spores sharing a hive mind that have no sense of responsibility or consequence

right Corey Corey murders and it's it's not for anything except to propagate the species because you are you are fertilizer for which Corey can grow for the Corey we are Corey yeah we get you Corey we understand

thank you so much for coming on the show Corey because your perspective is valuable Corey yes that's that's right Corey he's he's even more articulate today than he was in 2009 man it's true all our Corey that'll never not be true

and he's like 12 feet taller which is weird but I guess we're just not going to talk about that and 30 feet wider he's just a weird pile of bright purple spores at this point look I know I said it I brought the UV light I don't I'm looking at him I don't even want to use it I just want to go to water

oh no that means he might have got some spores in you yeah but I like it yeah that's aren't we all Corey we're all Corey we are Corey wait wait this is this is bad so they they come to Dave the question they gave

foot collector Dave is are you here just to get asked from women at home and he basically says to Megan yeah totally I believe wait I believe he said I'll take whatever is offered to me yes he's basically says if it's a lady at the bus station with no teeth I'll take it

I honestly this this having a lot of money did not work out for me the way I hoped it would and the best part was that somebody I didn't even see who it was somebody reached up to high five him and in the middle of this where Megan is sneering at him it's clearly the wrong thing to say he leans over and high fives the guy because that's how desperate

he is for the approval of anybody anybody I was just so shocked that he he was just like yeah like again and again these men are asked questions that make me say you can lie and they just don't they don't even it doesn't cross

their minds they're just like yeah I'm on piece of shit yep that's what it is just so adequate men who have it would been rich like all of their light or at least most of the lies long enough to forget that like you should be ashamed of the person that you are I believe that's the point of this show is like

hello you were you were with other millionaires this no longer makes you special what are you like a social experiment what happens if you remove shame from a group of people and then show them like you are now no longer exceptional do something

turns out one of the murders at least one of them this is what I can do this is my skill well yeah I said at one point that it's like all of them were expecting to be the weird guy on the reality TV show and then showed up and it was all the weird guys and now they don't have

anything to like distinguish their personalities except maybe big mic is such a cliche that he's not very weird to me like he's just such a soprano that's almost ordinary that there's just a hit man on this show you're like yeah yeah of course

look I've seen hit men before all right I'm not impressed he belongs here obviously yeah everybody came on this show with their personality trait being I'm a rich murder everybody's a rich murder oh fuck yeah big mic and punisher the only two that

stand out like big big big mic because of his Italian assassin vibes and punisher because he can function as a person and then everyone else is just a rich weirdo in a very similar but horrifying way so I don't envy you

your job Brockway is what I'm saying right so Brockway from the it's a tough job with this little game they played almost designed specifically to help you did it help you it did help but there's no way we can jump to that we've skipped the fight entirely between Brian and I know we're not

skipping the whole thing I'm just asking you if you have a better idea absolutely it helped me I feel like you said I feel like this episode was designed to help me it was like okay let's put them actually in attack mode against each other and see which one attacks successfully

which one is like has the murderer gene in them and the answer was like a surprising lot but in a totally inadequate way which I guess shouldn't surprise you but but it's helping can I can I set up the cake incident now is it time

absolutely I think it's time okay so Al has not done well in the competitions has not won a date and he feels like basically he's he's losing overall he thinks Megan is not interested in him so he's gonna like win her heart back by making her a cake well I skipped

they got into it after like basically after the face thing he just kind of went up to Ryan when Ryan was in his closet and was like mad at him in general and they had like some words I don't remember anything like distinct beings that size six shoes oh yes

really hard on his size six shoes one observation said you must have a small dick yes yeah I remember him saying a small dick and then the shoe thing and and it was so close to like I'm gonna attack you but it was more like you don't want you want to fuck with me I'll come after you

well they in the like preview in the preview in between things they showed him like saying I'll put you in the dirt and we were like oh there's gonna be a fight and then they cut to like the scene actually plays out and it's him saying like what are those size six shoes yeah man I'll put you in the dirt that's right

that's the fire I bring as lipless Al and he's like walking away as he says it too with he held up his fingers and he says I could say something to make you feel this small but didn't did not yes so that's their like first altercation

and then Al decides to make Megan a cake to like win her affections back and it's some kind of weird redneck pie is what he called it what is that does anybody know what that is I have no idea it's kind of like a cobbler you put it like a bunch of pie filling and fruit and then you put the

cake mix on top and it just sort of makes like a little crumbly shell that sounds terrible I would I mean it sounds very subtle it's fine yeah it's a cobbler like I've heard of a dump we found the redneck so I know the concept of like a dump cake and the redneck where you just yeah

so he puts his thing I made you feel this small he puts his thing in the oven is cake that he's done and he leaves and then Ryan gets up at some point and takes the cake out of the oven

and purposely fucks with the cake and he like stirs it and he's cashing it and like oh I'm helping him because I can tell the way he's made the cake it's not gonna work which is so fucked up like that I'm helping him he's clearly doing something

mean and then he puts it back and then when Al comes down the cake's fucked up and he is like livid and he knows that Ryan did it exactly all right I would like to do two impressions please I would like to do we are Cory

that's great Cory I don't have any impression for you because everything I say is already Cory I mean we've established that Cory you're great no fault we are terrific my impressions are here's lipless Al

at peace I'm lipless Al at peace and now here's lipless Al angry I'm lipless Al and I'm angry that's the energy he brought to this competition I am livid I'm livid

I'm livid I haven't been mad at anyone this much in years he's like the bully that you had in grade school that would sit behind the bus driver and make faces at you I forgot about that his weirdly specific bully what the fuck

there's some bully at home that's just like yes I knew I got you I knew I made an impression I'm not adlibbing he said this somebody has to say the thing that was so friggin weird say it shot oh my god what

which one oh yes of course of course oh god fuck he walks up to Ryan who presumably said he got to get it under control but that wasn't on camera so it opens with Al saying I can control every part of my body

I can control every part of my body to which Ryan's natural immediate response is yeah me too yes fucking I'm not even wetting myself dude I'm linking I'm linking right now I can control my eyelids

I wish we could I just I looked at a wall for I was just taken out of reality it was just how is your threat to somebody else you walk up to them and they're like I can control every part of my body my liver's processing the toxins

and that shitty cake you baked and then your immediate response to that as a threat is yeah of course I can too who can't full control over every part of my body this is what human males do don't do anything well my appendix does stuff

because I'm careful it would be a good insult if you were like mad at someone in a wheelchair that would be a real mean thing to say yeah that would be maybe that's the only time he successfully burned somebody and it was somebody in a wheelchair so he's banked it

and he's just coming back to it like a glass eye or something I can control every part of my body and then he like went cross-eyed and just one tear down one side of his face and also when he said that I think right before he said that he had ripped his shirt off and then he said

I can control every part of my body and it was just like a really weird combo of things and like are you going to show us now like are we going to see your pecs dance Al because that's like step one that would have been kind of cool I would have been on board for that that would have been cool

I would have been a gym buff Ryan's like big insult was to say he had a peck implants but he also kind of had some buff arms I think he just does a lot of benches I think Al and has just zero idea can control every part of his body

and has no idea what to do with it does one slap who do we think went with one at this point do you think Megan would get mad if you kicked somebody's ass like a lot of reality shows of course that altercation isn't over because they then

threw drinks in each other's faces several times like a sex in the city parody this throwing drinks over and over like one time is not enough Ryan started it and he did it backwards which was actually kind of cool

he didn't even look at Al he just floored Al with that drink toss let's second his second drink toss that should be said now Al was full on like adrenaline rage like he was pissed and Ryan did not give a shit

with no outward indicators it seemed like this was very comfortable for him not even when he was like rating his face and like wow this guy really might hit you you don't want to like maybe get your hands up he's like he just doesn't care he didn't look at him he threw the water over his shoulder without looking in his face

he was like straight forward at the camera completely his comfort zone is this bully shit and Punisher knew that there was no threat from either of these men but he still like Kwanha wants to let Al save some face

so he stands there to sort of push him away like oh no no don't fight I'll hold you back to which Al does that little dog thing where he's like now you're holding me back now I'm gonna go hard Punisher did the right thing Punisher's a good friend here to just sort of let Al save

a tiny bit of his lipless face you can forgive him for kind of laughing the whole time he was entertained clearly he's only human he's the only guy on this show that I like he seems like

I hate the butler, I hate every contestant yeah butler sucks foot collector Dave might be the biggest piece of shit I've ever seen yeah I don't know that there's a less likeable human I mean let's be real Cory we're very likeable yes

I love you Cory, no you love me did you guys notice that Francisco showed up in like the middle of that fight and came and sat down next to Ryan too and was just like eating raisins or something yes he said four things he's such a professional spectator

of this show it's great but like he came in and sat down like he didn't realize anything was going on and Al was shirtless and screaming we were throwing drinks at each other and he's like this is just like when mommy and daddy talk once a year well the thing is he's half Cuban half Puerto Rican

so he eats raisins during a bitch fight that's the rest of that joke that old stereotype the lost joke we found it clearly so the people who won the date was

TJ got the first one they rented a $1,500 Rolls Royce for the hour very affordable someone says hey rent a fancy car it's going to cost $400 an hour I'd be like wow that's really expensive but what a fun occasion if it's $15 an hour

I'm like that's fucking cartoon money right that's when my mind starts to think I could literally buy two dune buggies and fucking crash them and never look back and that's so much better than a Rolls Royce for an hour it was a Rolls Royce Phantom I don't know if that makes it a fancier Rolls Royce

but I still I don't even believe today that would be $1,500 an hour I think that would be $1,500 a day yeah maybe they don't do it by the hour oh man this is do you think there might be some price gouging going on and Megan wants a million

how could you accuse them of that I'm so hybrid can't that we recant that all of the Cori's recant that we're all very sorry he just had like eight grand in his pocket because I guess the card declining thing like really scared everybody

somebody learned in the non-entity learned a giant wad of cash and pays $1,500 in cash so this guy might legitimately be wealthy this is not a fake millionaire like Canadian Ryan

you get the impression some of them are not oh man we skipped over Canadian Ryan's question where she asked what's your net worth and he was like I do everything 100% and she's like yeah that's not money after a 40 second silence followed by what was the question again

he just devastated hey how much money do you have on this show that is exclusively about how much money you have what was the question have you given me my $800 SAG payment today because

once that check clears $900 it was so weird there was no vetic nobody vetted anything here it's very clear that Ryan is the only one that knows that you can lie because he came up with that bullshit so fast

how are you so bad at it how did you just freeze just say like 4 million if you're gonna lie about it say liquid I don't know a couple million that's fine like no one's gonna be like no no no get me your fucking bank statement right now and you're overseas holdings

you're all murderers nobody vetted this and you know that you can prove it you're on the show yeah he's still bad yeah he could have said 4 million don't google it and no one would have you're right if you google people's net worth it's almost always millions like you fucking google like

screech it'll say he isn't even dead yet and he's worth $17 million none of it's right and he had sex four times not according to his biography I have his biography and according to it he had sex at Disneyland a lot

wait didn't that guy die four times yes he's okay I was like yeah we're still screeches fine it's fine to make fun of screech yeah that's true he spent many years as a dirtbag he made that fake porn video oh I kinda remember that yeah

yeah and he went on that celebrity weight loss show he hated him to the point where they kicked him off and then he came back on yeah he did celebrity boxing he did a lot of unspeakable things why was he not on Megan wants to marry

a millionaire that's really weird because he wasn't a millionaire because nobody would believe he's a millionaire back to the show after the date with TJ went well like TJ's just the most average

generic man that's ever been he doesn't have any inflection in his voice, he doesn't have any personality he literally said I have no expectations to her that was his way of selling himself that was his draw he thought that was a positive he said

I am here with no expectations I am looking for the American family that's also an exact quote I am looking for the American family three kids a house she was like this is what I want

a very witch man right I want to dominate this witch man who has no attributes who was given a character select screen and said no thank you he's just T-posing through the meal so they finally

finish this meal mercifully it's over it's a bad TV date then they go to Punisher and Corey who go have these on a $3,900 yacht rental which is very expensive

Corey does not want to do it we hated that let's do it, split it I only had sex with four old ladies for that kind of money Corey was like finally got talked into it 20 minutes silence

whatever you say, if you want to okay then we can do it that's what you want and they do it they put her on the yacht things go well with Punisher he's kind of like, does that body language thing where she's clearly trying to put her mouth on his

and he's kind of moving his head back I don't want to make out with you I don't know if he likes it that's my little reality TV opinion the producers build this you're going to have a showdown Punisher over his 500 girls

she started off grilling him on that and he was like, yeah she was like, alright let's make out you're not 501 sorry they had the most normal kiss of any kiss on the show for sure

for their level of relationship it was a normal kiss, just kind of smootch a couple of times he didn't try to suck the back of her throat thank god, the only one who didn't yes he might be the only guy that hasn't made out with her so I think she's kissed all of them

at this point, but he's the only one that hasn't like, face fucked her what a gentleman so she then goes and spends some time with yes, what gentleman do you so she spends some time with Corey, speaking of gentlemen near the water, the best place to spend time with Corey

soaking up the moisture, it loves it we love it so much the entity we know is Corey just stares vacantly at her and confesses he's just fucking not into her are you not feeling this, he's like I don't know, I don't fucking whatever she told him she really liked him and he was like

okay let's pause for a minute Corey, what were you thinking in that scene we are Corey brutal what a brutal tone of Megan yeah, that's exactly now that it's stupid of me to ask

because of course Corey used to be able to talk, like in 2009 anyway right, but really all he was ever saying was we are Corey yeah, I think we could all just hear it as other things, but that's never what it was

they had a voice actor to do some ADR those two things was be near water, we are Corey so that didn't go well she leaves that date thinking highly of Punisher and thinking much less of Corey why didn't he spore me again, was there something wrong with me

we didn't talk about we didn't talk about what was going on at the house as that date was going on because there was more drama that's kind of become the format for the show there's a very boring date and as they're like okay, well this isn't doing anything they just go to the contestants

and kind of like kick them and poke them and hope that like some kind of drama happens they're really apart you can't even prod them a little bit these poor men are not the flavor of love girls they are not psychologically able to handle what the producers are doing

to them so David tries to leave David packs his fucking bags he's quitting, the guy who said he's not a quitter several times during the episode he quit who demanded special time last episode you need to come and sit down with me

so that I can explain to you I'm not a quitter, I just quit and then he quits yes, and there's a great scene where he was going to the kitchen to eat some chips and Brockway says he's going to quit on those chips and then he fucking does he just like holds up the bag

and he's like no, I'm not going to eat these chips he looked at the bag of chips and was like this is too hard he quit, he quit I'm not going to do these chips so then the other guys talk him out of quitting which means he legally quit quitting

David quit quitting he's such a hardcore quitter he couldn't even quit because he quit god damn it, I love him and this guy's keep in mind this is going to get him so late when he gets home because he came out there and he explained to the other guys

like basically in the most arrogant way possible I'm going to quit because nobody likes me and they were like, yeah nobody likes you but don't quit and he was like yeah, you guys like me and they were like no, just don't quit they were like uh

we called it out as soon as they said it we were like somebody's going to rat you out for that, you're going home well if you guys recall at the beginning of this episode when they announced the mask thing I said someone's definitely leaving this episode because they can't handle this

and I wished I'd said David because I thought of him I was like right because David has quit everything they've asked him to do they've asked him to do two things and he quit three times somehow, yes he found a way, he found that extra quit

life finds a way the only thing he hasn't quit is quitting so they do have a big dinner with everyone and Megan is like we're not here to eat, I want everyone to say who I should eliminate and David's like oh this fucking bullshit come on

like he's super mad that like just a huge glass of wine I'm going to drink as much as I can because I'm going home I didn't know there'd be a fucking bullshit conversation about the basic conceit of this whole show I didn't know they were going to do what they do constantly all the time

on pretty much every reality show and then he's pouring the wine into the camera like look at me I'm so upset yeah so Canadian Ryan says I think you should eliminate Al just to fuck with Al and then it cuts to Al

and Al who is just a weird coward instead of saying no get rid of the guy who said to get rid of me he says that other guy David he quit, he tried to quit doesn't even call out run, you're one chance it's literally the thing where you're running from a monster and it's like you don't have to out run the monster

you just have to out run the next week as person and he knew the next week as person was David and he just you know stuck out his leg and tripped him and it worked you're so weak that you were able to find the weaker guy 30 seconds later David's fucking out because Megan's like is that true did you try to quit

and David's like yeah well yeah and then he gave basically the same excuse he gave last time which is like I have to make a decision for myself and alright this is what happened I'm not quitting, I'm just making a decision to quit

different things he literally doesn't make an excuse and that's his excuse like that type of person like sure it is what it is the thing happened, can't change the past and that's how I accept responsibility for things so Megan's like do you want to go and he's like

yeah okay he stops he actually stops and says what right now I was gonna finish my dinner I just poured this big glass of wine I really respected that he tried to sneak out before Megan got back from her other date

like he was trying to because he knew he couldn't go toe to toe with Megan she would have murdered him, she would have just tore him into shreds she would have actually bit him like she didn't even have time to tear him to shreds she was just like get out right because she has seen this coming since the moment

he was on the show like okay yeah go this is the second guy second guy she did that too where they tried to quit and then she's like no no no before you go I want to emotionally destroy you and dominate you which is yeah great

I will do this he had good instincts he was starting to learn what pride might be and thinking okay if I have pride I have to get out of here before I'm humiliated but then he quit but then he had to go and he had to go check in with the other guys

like is this cool is this what cool is and we're like no you know what's really cool is to get super embarrassed on TV yeah thanks guys hey while I'm here Punisher you want to talk pussy again find that common ground with your friends

did we even cover how in that interaction he said like something along the lines of how interested are ladies and what you've got down here Punisher was like yeah they're really interested and he was like super into it that was so awkward

so good everything he said was just maximum awkward they had to cut out so much racial shit I know he said some weird racial shit in that conversation it was implied it was already uncomfortable like yeah

somewhere around this time we take a commercial break and for the guy doing the hype piece we're like hey it's your boy they picked lipless owl they made him say hey it's your boy it's your boy

like that's a directive he didn't really say that that's the energy he was going for no I swear at the beginning he said it's your boy owl he might have I don't know I don't think he did but the energy was very much like

you put me in the hype booth and I've never been less qualified to do something he like subbed a line he's like doing it doing for some excitement we are Corry watch Corry see that's pretty good

every time that's what they needed you know what I think every guy on this show should have just been Corry that would have made it so much better if they would have left him in the house for 3 more weeks it would have happened we haven't seen the unedited episodes

I'm pretty sure they were all Corry I'm pretty sure hold on let me check world Corry that's true that's the episode I do think that's the episode yeah Megan does not eliminate anyone

she gathers them all up and acts like she's going to but then she's like no you can all stay and she doesn't even do it that good she doesn't leave him hanging at all she's just like no it's that one you're all staying it's so clear the producers dragged her aside and we're like every one of these guys is a washout

it's just going to be Punisher Punisher doesn't want to quit Punisher and like Big Mike you can't cut you can't cut anybody Punisher's not even into this but everybody else is just washing out we asked them to do something

and it was the wrong move yeah I think TJ would accept another date with her he'd be fine I think honestly if you put TJ on a conveyor belt he would just stand on that conveyor belt until it dropped him into the ocean yeah TJ doesn't have an agency you guys didn't watch his face

he has such an expressive face and at that dinner what's her dog's name? Lily Francisco wants to be Lily just to be carried around by her and like yeah and like nurtured

he needs to be nurtured and like introduced to the world by Megan I get that he wants to live in her purse and beef head scraps is what he wants and Ryan seems like he'd be fine with her he seems to like her

but he seemed way more interested in like torturing little self the only time I've really seen him come alive was like inharming out like he really came into his element as soon as he found like a good victim he was just oh here we go

and his weird little smirk it doesn't move at all his weird little joker smile with the scar slashes it just ticked up a little bit and Al's little joker slash friend ticked down a little bit yeah you called them comedy and tragedy masks

and I thought that was pretty good they got opposite mouths and that's why they hate each other so watch the show you'll get it that's the whole show there will never be another episode of Megan wants a millionaire who is your all lesser for it

main pick for the murderer well clearly Cory's out Cory's never done any wrong and we won't discuss it we are Cory yeah I know you're welcome pal

and it's great every time every time solid today Foot Collector David really showed us how pathetic he is and I do understand that patheticness can turn to rage that's true I think there's still something there

and especially because of the details that have leaked out that I have learned as we've gone through this that it's another gold digger that the person has married after this show somehow it was his wife he said that I believe that was the first episode

we found out I think that's a David move is to like immediately get married he said I will take the first thing some woman came along saw me he was like I have a million dollars

I was just on this TV show and she was like yeah you'll do for like two months while I get your money and he was like deal I think that can turn to rage and he's still part of it that is an elegant story now as a professional storyteller

you put that together very quickly and it's a like I say very elegant all the pieces I've been thinking it it's been going on David, Foot Collector David has been he's been a forerunner for the last like three episodes

he's a popular choice on that my only criticism is real life is never that the narrative of real life is never that clean well I'll walk you through the motives after I finish eliminating through them so Canadian Ryan has also been a forerunner just because there's such weird cruelty in him

and like he second he described a human woman the first time he got a date with Megan and was like she is a collection of feet and knees and like let's rewind to the very first thing the reason we call him Canadian Ryan isn't because he's Canadian

it's because the very first thing he said on the show was hey have you ever met a Canadian before it's such a murderer thing to say that's the craziest thing to say and then he whispered how about some Canadian Megan just sidestep of

your teeth would look terrific in my pouch my tooth pouch right there is some savage serial killer energy he's got that weird Joker smile that never moves the only time I've ever seen him happy or animated at all is torturing a smaller animal which is Al

so David and Ryan are your top picks are on there and before this episode before I went to water I would have said Corey clearly Corey's out so Corey has his grips his spore like tendrils

are clamped into your brain and steering you around we all agree that Corey could not do it he's too kind just an all around good being well I mean Corey does destroy but it's part of Corey's nature and we forgive and love Corey for that

we are all Corey we are all Corey God I mean we kind of always been Corey really deep down that's the moral of the show that's the moral of the show is we are Corey yeah humanity's all gonna be

it's all gonna be Corey guys we're all gonna come out of this Corey I think Punisher I'm settled on Punisher if he has a murder is a self-defense murder he's a con-air situation waiting to happen I was gonna say don't you dare

I liked his character in this episode I don't think Big Mike was paid $3,000 in a Walmart parking lot to kill this woman because it was his wife so I don't that's the only murder I can picture him doing I genuinely no longer think Francisco is any kind of murder

I know that's a huge step back yeah he's an aspiring person he's too harmless I even think Joe I'd stand by my guns that Joe will accidentally kill a child in some way I will drown a child somehow

I know that in my bones to be true going back through them Garth and the unfinished clone I mean yes they're murderers I don't think they're this murderer coming back to it TJ is still so nothing

that it's suspicious TJ is like when you go to Disneyland at night and it's creepy and you're like there's no reason for this to be creepy but it really is like a hallmark husband that kills his wife yes that's the vibe that's the exact vibe

that's the vibe thank you that just clicked for me yeah that's exactly it he's definitely gonna kill Tori Spelling on TV somehow he is that's my top three

it's Foot Collector David because he has that weenie rage and like when you set off that weenie rage many times it gets crazy Canadian Ryan is just a gleeful cruel murderer that just like

there's no other level to that he's just a gleeful cruel murderer on this show and TJ is Disneyland at Night murderer hallmark channel murderer the murderer that you would not expect everybody says like seem like a happy family that's TJ

can I be the one to say one of those three it has to be one of those no it is it is one of those three so I think you should narrow it down really wait really wait oh

you're so close wow I'm sorry I took that from you no no no you're the main expert oh shit it should have come from you oh yes thank you

I know you love Megan I've enjoyed this process so much I gotta work through this a little more alright she had her hands cut off her feet cut off stuffed them a suitcase her teeth pulled out got it so dark why are we doing this show

when it comes down to it what the fuck is wrong with us this is a really bad show what have we done wait it's the end of the last episode and I'm just realizing we shouldn't have done this at all alright but that's really that's

no that can be two ways alright that's either that's either a really cruel really fucked up murder like you're just you're just like taking apart a woman to take apart a woman and it's savage and mean and terrible I think it's that in any case

but I mean well either it's that because you want to see like because the human body is meat to you when you want to see what it does or you killed a woman and you thought you were being very clever

by taking out her teeth for dental records taking off her hands for fingerprints the feet is crazy which is foot collector David style like there's no reason to take feet although I could oh here it is I could see foot collector David

being like well as we all know I'm a foot guy I know I haven't said specifically that I'm into feet but you can look at me and know that like Quentin Tarantino opened something up in me and I've been into feet this whole time so as a foot guy I know I could

pick any foot out of a lineup all feet are unique so if there is such a thing as fingerprints there must be such a thing as toe prints so I'm going to take the feet too because I'm smarter than the cops because I will throw the goggles back in your face when you offer them

to me in the moat at the mini golf course and then cry drowning while I'm pulling my eyes I can later tell everyone that I think this is going to get me super late the fact that I've been on this show there's such a disconnect with reality

alright alright and then T.J. I think God T.J. is such a non entity that I can't predict him so it's either it's either Canadian Ryan or it was like an act of pure savagery that's Canadian Ryan if it was I've killed my wife and now I think

I'm too smart so I'm going to do this shit it's David okay it's one of those two wait it's one of those two it's not T.J. you've correctly eliminated T.J. I like that you're doing it through reason it's like watching

Sherlock Holmes yeah this is just like watching Sherlock Holmes I can't decide I just I don't know I don't know enough about the murder to know if it was a murder through savagery or a murder while somebody a total idiot

oh shit no I got it you can do it no Sean this whole time has been saying every time I mention the murder he's like yeah yeah it seems like as if somebody who watched too much TV I might have even been a quote from something it seems like somebody who watched too much TV

did a murder I'm not saying that I think that's a clue it's something that investigators actually said oh so investigators if investigators actually said that Ryan would be traveling off the feet and the hands and the teeth for pure savagery

it's David that would do it because he thought he could get away with it that he thought he was too smart for it I think it's David it is not David fuck Ryan

I am not at all surprised you are so close though I am actually genuinely very impressed that you got it down to within two guys that's really good when all these guys are so fucking weird like you said like any of these guys and if David went to prison for the rest of his life

like that's good that's a good thing he unjustifies the means on that feel bad about accidentally picking Ryan Jenkins and the company that was meant to vet him

obviously can vet people from Canada but there was some sort of an error with the Canadian clerk that did not disclose domestic abuse or arrest so it was like a human error that led to them not knowing that this is a red flag

which presumably they wouldn't have put so they actually had they could have prevented it this is an actual so some more details about this was that obviously at the time of 2009 it was like reality had reality shows had been ramped up

to this point where like a woman straight up saying like hi I want millionaires to come and compete for me and buy me things on the show $3,800 boat rides that's the kind of shit we're talking about that's where reality TV was so someone having an arrest for an assault might not

be a deal breaker but probably should have been maybe should have been I would think that insurance wise they couldn't have let him on if they knew that right there's it's more than just like the opinion of one producer so he was after they filmed this

Ryan went to Vegas I guess he did really well on the show and he was either I think he got second place I don't know who won maybe he won I don't know if he won Megan I heard that he won I Love Money

which was why that season of I Love Money was canceled okay so he went on another show after this this was his he thought he was the spin-off character but he was doing really well on Megan and he thought he was going to get with Megan and in fact Megan was contacting him

off the show like just friendly texts or romantic text or whatever I enjoy your cruelty it's the one thing I've seen from you I enjoyed when you made Al Sraab when he and Megan didn't work out he basically went to Vegas and got married to a model almost immediately

and then he flew down to Mexico to film I Love Money Season 3 and he was doing very well on that and one of the things about that was he kept calling his wife and checking in on her and he was really really insecure he was sure that she was cheating on him while he was at

a town and the producers were even making fun of him like look at how fucking insecure this guy was they were doing like a storyline based around it so they're not when they see red flag behaviors they're not like oh we should take care of this they're like ha ha film this fucker so that's why

they didn't think they didn't connect the dots at that point that like insecurity can lead to rage can lead to this you didn't understand at that point that that's a danger as we very much do now I had no idea that was part of this that that was all going on like while he was on the show I thought it was

he yes done with it yeah this is and dark shit so he committed this unspeakable act and then tried to get away with it but um it's pretty difficult to get rid of like a murder when like you're a reality show dirt bag

and your wife gets murdered like they know who the suspect is yeah but also they identified the body very quickly because she had breast implants and those have like serial numbers on them yeah so oh that is grim I actually that's one of the few details I think somebody spoiled that in the discord

but they didn't spoil like they just wanted to say that detail and I like I've been haunted by it ever since that's just that's very one of the darkest fucking things I've ever heard like that's straight out of a Norwegian crime novel yeah right so

two days after that they cancel I love money they cancel Megan wants a millionaire and the the vetting company basically went out of business no one wants to work with the people that let them murder right you fucked up as hard as you can possibly fuck up you're one job

yeah so it probably would have been they wouldn't have blamed them if he hadn't had an actual assault conviction and so they ended up suing a company for like

the company that fucked it up and I think they got like $800,000 and then the company's cost of a human life for sure like some more lawsuits went through in the end I think it was something like 13 or 14 million dollars where the lawsuits came from

like these shows being canceled and these like companies being destroyed and it is and not to mention that but the entire landscape of reality television changed like at this point it really did just overnight this was the fulcrum not cute to have

crazy people on TV anymore it was not cute to have just a moral shows about fucking shitty people doing shitty things at the time it was pushed this so far that there's been an actual murder and so that's so crazy yeah I didn't know all that that that was

how much of that was going on like basically because of this show and maybe because of his emotions pending like after the show that is dark and especially because of how creepy he is on this show when he's picking on Al that whole thing I was like I think Brock

can get this seeing this guy really latch on to like Al that did absolutely cement him in second place was like the only time I've seen him truly happy was when he was victimizing that guy like I think we can all relate to like hating somebody or having a rivalry

and saying mean things to hurt someone right like a lot I could like if I was in the show I could see making fun of Al a little bit but the gleefulness with which he did it like the comfort that he was in when like Al was fucking so pissed he's like yes this is what I want and he's just like smiling

not in like so creepy like we got a lot of that on flavor of love like the girls were really mean and they tried to get them to lose their temper and then that would be like a victory but it was like this real like smug like bitchy attitude like haha I made her loser shit that's what she gets from messing with me but

yeah Ryan was like yes yes I feed on your your hate and then the gas lighting up like kind of doing the thing with the cake and then being like well I'm a good guy because I helped him with the cake this is what I'm doing is I'm helping while he's clearly fucking it

up like that that was for some reason I guess because I knew really just right from the start you ever met a Canadian before is the most murder thing to say yeah you're just told as he might as well have said hey I'm gonna murder

like maybe not you so it's cool and he did have a Joker smile I almost said he has a Joker smile but I didn't want to give anything away when you said it he does he has weird slashes in his face it's a crazy face to have for a murder especially

yeah it's creepy congratulations Brockway on almost finding a murderer did they catch him I gotta assume did he buy his way out of prison no he's dead he authorities were closing in on him and he committed suicide that's how this

story ends you uh you're far too late to catch the murderer he uh he murdered himself well then we did it we got him we got him this dog zone 9000 was brought to you by this dog zone 9000 was brought to you by

this dog zone The Meat Millie