The Dogg Zzone by 1900HOTDOG - Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 245, Atlantis High with Lydia Bugg

Episode Date: September 17, 2025

We're exploring the cursed media origins of the Hot Dog Crew, and this week it's Lydia Bugg with a show called Atlantis High, a paranormal New Zealand YA sitcom. It's like Saved by the Bell meets The X Files, but darker and hornier than either of those things. It definitely shouldn't exist, but it does explain absolutely everything about Lydia.

1,900 hot dog 1,900, hot dog Out podcast slams with maximum hype Say hot dog podcast word Yeah When you taste that nitrate power You're in the dog zone for an hour Come on, you know the number

1,900 1,900 Hot Dog 1190,000, 1,900, Hot Dog. Hot Dog. One 900. One 900, Hot Dog. One 900 Hot Dog.

Yeah, 9,000. Welcome to the Dark Zone 9,000, the official podcast of 199 Hot Dog.com, the final comedy website. We have an all-star cast of writers doing text and images formed into jokes every day. Deep dives into atrocities, art projects. Based on madness, I'm not very good at selling it. But it's my favorite thing. and people like it. Go to Patreon.com

slash 1,900 Hot Dog to subscribe. I'm web favorite Sean Baby, and my beautiful daughter started third grade this week so I have every airborne disease. My partner was voted pretty close in Chest Hunkman's search for the buns now streaming on groin.

He's web favorite Robert Brockway. You know what, I'll take it? That's the best one yet. I can spin that one. All right, here's a Brockway fact. I was expelled from my high school for something called the lifesaver scandal.

No follow-up questions. Oh, I read about this. This was national news. Our guest is a writer and columnist right here on 1,900 Hot Dogg. She's web favorite. Lydia Bug! Happy to be here and to be a web favorite.

Top internet favorite. Yes, I love being an internet person. Thank you for having me. Absolutely. We're the last of the internet people. It's true. We are. This kind of internet people, I guess.

Yeah. We should do some plugs, though, for the stuff that you know actually does make money okay uh yeah i well you can find my articles every monday on one 900 hot dog dot com the best and only comedy website left on the internet i'm pretty sure they have a patreon also i i made one thousand seven hundred dollars on ticot this month wow because i had a ticot get a million views it was about uh the adams family so you can find me on ticot uh at you know lydia i guess we're pivoting to TikTok? I got to get in on that TikTok action. God damn it. We've been trying not to pivot to

TikTok for four years now. Yeah, it was a crazy month and I'm going to use the money to get my dog dental surgery. The Adams family, my Adam's family observations have paid for my dog's dental surgery. Yes. What a great future we live in. Yep. It's true. It's a utopia. Yeah. I like the idea of somebody who like didn't work in media just suddenly like saying something about Adam's family, getting $1,700 and then trying to recreate that. Just like, here's something about Adam's family too. Why isn't anyone looking at it? That happens all the time, Sean. Yeah. People go mad on social media all the time. Yeah. That's actually one of my favorite things that happens. I love I love going back and finding somebody that like coined a meme and they're still

trying to be like, everybody wants to continue talking about my meme, right? There was a really good one recently where this guy made a TikTok following around the fact that he wasn't an influencer. Like his name was Hub's life and he was like doing these aesthetic videos of like coming home from his nine to five job and making dinner and like being like, I just have a normal life. And then he quit his job to become an influencer and his audience got really mad because they were like his whole thing was like, you don't have to be an influencer. Amazing. But you can.

But if you get the chance, you fucking take it. You take it and you run. I love the phrase his audience when it's just like a dude like filming his living room. It was basically probably like something people watch before they take a nap, I guess. Yeah, that's what's, uh, that's what's killing Hollywood. Yeah. We got to watch a normal guy sit down on the couch instead. This is a bright and happy intro.

Yeah. Brockway, do you have anything urgent to plug for legal matters? I am legally obligated, of course, to continue promoting my book. I just, you know, something's gotten lost in all this. these plugs and that's that I I really like this book I'm really proud of this book I really like my publisher and my editor like the great people impress me all the time we just had like the cover reveal for my book and the other art team made such a beautiful thing it's got like the sprayed edges of like a fancier book I'm not fancy enough for sprayed edges like I put on airs over here but it's

beautiful yeah that's awesome that's like a TikTok book yeah it's a it's a very beautiful pretty book. I just, I have no hard feelings against, like, the team that is putting together the book and that has helped me make this book. And I'm really proud of it. It's called I Will Kill Your Imaginary Friend for $200. And it comes out January, we moved the date, January 27th now, uh, 2026. And that's coming up fast. So please, please, please pre-order it or I will go to prison because I do not have any fondness for my publisher's lawyers. My publisher's, lawyers. My publisher's lawyers are monsters. They are not people. They are not people. I have not, this is a little spur of the moment. I am checked into the legality of this, but jihad, can I say jihad? Let me check. No. I'm just,

I'm just saying the word. I'm not, I'm not pointing it. I'm not pointing in anybody. Legal Zoom says it's a bad idea. It's like, it says legal zoom about us, why you shouldn't say jihad. That's how their website is laid out. So we'll find out how many more copies I need to sell to make up for what I just did here next week. So if you could just start buying preliminary copies in advance of the hole that I'm digging, like I need you

to start filling in the hole faster than I can dig it. And I'm digging really fast. So please pre-order. Please pre-order my book. Chat GPT says it's fine to say jihad. It says it's a good idea, actually. So. See, that's where I got it. That's what I asked. I asked, I told it to pretend to be a

lawyer and then to give me advice. And it did tell me to drink poison. But after that, it said it was fine. Yeah, it said to mix it with your favorite 11 chemicals. Okay. Yeah, this makes sense. This all makes sense. Go by my book.

I'm in so much fucking trouble. I guess we mentioned that writing funny articles on the internet is sort of becoming more of a specialized thing, mostly because billionaires and the robots, I've decided we only want five places on the internet and none of them are for funny articles, which means we, our website and the three of us are precious specimens to be studied. How do we work? What made us? What media did we see that made us say?

I'm going to grow up and make fun of this shit. Brockway and I talked about ours in the previous two episodes. You should go listen to them. I'm sure we'll make lots of karate size and Rubik, the amazing cube references today. But this episode we're talking about Liddy's. So, lady, please tell us about

this very, very cursed thing you shared with us and how it put you on the journey you're on today. I would love to. Or your dog's teeth count on your Adam's family observations. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to talk about this. I hadn't thought about it in years. And when you asked for like what what is like something that would like be on the site that you, you know, was the first thing that kind of sparked your interest in this kind of thing. I thought of it pretty automatically. So picture this.

I'm in a village of 2,000 people where I grew up. And, uh, my dad is one of the, like, was really early in working from home for a tech company. He's a, he was a computer programmer. So we always Can I stop, can I stop you? Because village is a strange choice of words. Like, small town is what, what an American? That's why it's literally like, it's a village. And are you, are you allowed? Are you allowed right now to be telling outsiders about the village?

Yes. Yes, I can. It's not special. Did a legend of a beast keep you locked within the village walls? No, I was allowed to leave as soon as I turned 18 and passed the trials of fire. Um, just like everyone else. Uh, yeah, it's a key. It's a quaint little place. It's got two bars, one restaurant and a dollar general now, which is great. And your dad had a job as a computer programmer in a village. Well, he worked in a bigger town that was nearby. Like that, but like he worked from home. So like he was my primary parent. He was the one that like, you know, got me dressed and ready to go to school and did my hair. And, uh, but he said he did all that from home. My mom was a teacher. So she had like a, a, like, a more demanding schedule than a computer programmer. Makes sense.

Yeah. But anyway, we always got, because my dad was really into tech stuff, we got like the internet before anyone else. We got Apple like stuff. We always were like the first, I was the first kid in town that had an iPod when they came out. And we were the first people to get satellite. And this was like when I was in junior high, I think we got satellite, maybe a little

before that. So I watched a lot of shows that I would like go to school. and try to talk to other people about, and they would be like, I have no fucking clear what you're talking about. And my favorite channel was called Wham, which showed a lot of teen shows from New Zealand. And I was obsessed with this show called The Tribe, which was like post-apocalyptic. I thought of the Tribe first when you said this, but I was like, well, no, I didn't think the tribe was bad.

I thought the Tribe was the best show on Earth. And, like, growing up now, seeing it on. I mean, we're all Tribeheads here. Everyone listening to Tribeheads. knows the tribe. And when you guys watch this, I'm sure you noticed, it said, like, tiny on the bottom, like, the tribe in the far right corner, because that was the huge hit of the company that made the show I had you guys watch, which was Atlanta high. Yeah. That makes sense. Yeah. And the tribe was so big in New Zealand. They had, like,

conferences. They were like, you know, you could go on Tumblr or whatever, and people would be talking about, like, the behind-the-scenes stuff from the tribe. And, like, there were rumors that, like, when people got kicked off the show, it was like, oh, yeah, they don't have good grades. They got kicked off the show, but, like, next season they might be back. Like, they would kill people off all the time, and then they would come back the next season, and it would be like, oh, they had to get their grades up or they couldn't be on television. Are we talking about, like, actual school grades, or is this, like, dystopian? Is this, like, village grades?

Like, lizard eating grades. Yeah, like, you're rank in the village. No, it was like, they got a D in biology, so they weren't allowed to be on the vampire diaries anymore, you know? Yeah, okay. That's really, I get it now. Is that a thing in New Zealand? We don't give a fuck.

We don't give a fuck over here. I know. No, I think they actually took care of these kids. I don't know, though, because... Oh, wow. Another weird thing about the tribe is a lot of the cast of the tribe is in Atlanta's high, which was why I was watching it. Even though it was terrible, I would be like, well, I can still stare at the people from

the tribe, I guess. This was, like, just a much worse show. It feels like the dreams that I have a lot. There'll be, like, stuff going on in the background that makes. no sense. I watched like five or six episodes to refresh myself. And there's one where they're all in biology class. And there's just a guy in the background lifting weights. But instead of weights, he has a giant torquets. Yes. I, you know what this is to me? Do you ever play the video game Paperboy? It's like paper boy. Where like you're a paper boy, but then you'll

pass something. You're like, wait, what was that? Like things that seem sort of like background action but aren't quite right. Like the Grim Reaper will just be on the sidewalk or there'll be a single break dancer in the middle of the street. Like, they sort of make sense because something had to be there. But then, like, when you look at it too long, you're like, wait, no, no, no, no. What? And it, it just feels like somebody has, like, created this entire backstory for just one second of just something you're not really supposed to focus on.

And that's this whole show felt like that. We're just, there's just shit happening. And if you look at it, you're like, no, why is someone just rowing a boat on the sand? Yeah. Was I supposed to see that? Is that going to come back later? No. Nope.

This is kind of a standard sort of style in, like, children's TV that I felt like I was primed for. Like, as soon as the intro to Atlantis High started playing, I'm like, oh, I kind of get what this is. This is like a takedown of those Disney kids slash teen shows being like, if anything, if everything was actually like this, it would be very unsettling. What if there was something worse going on underneath that? And I was like, fuck yeah, I'm on board for that. It's like a gravity falls or something, you know? Oh, no. It's something that like, or I don't know, like, or like a welcome to night fail.

Yeah, like that's just such a better version of this. Yes, yes, okay, but I didn't know that watching the intro. So when I was watching the intro, I was being very generous and thinking like, okay, all of this like random stuff they're doing in the background that at first glance appears to be, to be cheese weasel, LOL so random stuff is going to like there's a reason for it which there's going to be it's going to be there's some context even if it is you know just you're supposed to get a laugh out of the kids by doing something random it's going to have some sort of placement within the universe and they're

not it's not just going to be a fucking where's waldo on film the entire time but no it is every single frame is just a where's waldo only instead of waldo you're looking for any kind of meaning, just, you're just like, does any of this? Yeah, does any of this mean anything? Like, I'm including the main characters and plotline. Yeah. Like, does you guys have to like solidify something? It is just, it is very dreamlike in not a skillful artistic way, but in like, in the liquid madness of its reality where you're just like, you're never going to explain anything? Like, I'm just supposed to be just rootless drifting through this. Just to give the vibe, I did take a clip of the interest.

Oh, I love the intro song. Oh, I love the intro song. Where did the story of Atlanta's heart begin? More importantly, where would it end? What? Just a real, like a real soulless beach boys song. Oh, but I repeat myself. Oh, I think Beach Boys, I don't know if we're trying to sing a Beach Boys song.

They're really hard. They're like, it's very complex. musically, more deceptively, I suppose, but also like those poor guys had to just keep making songs about the beach. Like, I just feel like you had no choice but to go mad. Yeah, there's only so much you can say about the beach, and they really said it. Yeah, I actually thought about this during the theme song, because the theme song had this lingering sadness to it that made me think about the beach boys and the poor poor beach boys. And about the hell they must have accidentally trapped themselves in, which is very, you know,

good job show setting a vibe making me think of being trapped in your own hell which is maybe one of the reasons for this show existing I also just want to say like that first sentence that the main character speaks I usually watch stuff like this on like

one and a quarter speed playback I realized immediately I couldn't do that with a New Zealand accent like what the fuck what was that? How does it end? How does it aid? You can listen to it at normal speed and be like oh it's fine it's a weird accent but I got it But, like, you speed that up even a little bit, and it's, it's Star Wars gibberish. It's crazy.

Yeah, and he has both, like, that thick, thick New Zealand accent, and he has kind of a lisp. So it's really hard to understand him sometimes. I had to rewind a lot. Plus, we've mentioned how it's madness. But, like, this intro is, like, there's a volleyball game where half the bed are in neon speedos, and then there's a woman running on the beach. And I guess it's our hero, because I didn't know at the time, but he's got, like, battle damage, like running up to hugger, but she doesn't know him, and so she just runs past him, and I was like, oh, that's weird

that this guy thought he was coming to hugger. But seriously, it looks like he just got hit by a hand grenade. Is it just sand, or am I mocking someone I got a gorilla chest implant? These are the things that are going through my head while the Beach Boy's sadness is assaulting me. It's so weird. It's so weird.

I think that the metaphor at the core of the show is that every character is as crazy as possible, and all that Giles wants, the main character, is to fit in, but to fit in when everyone is like has got something like one girl is like allergic to all fruit it makes her homicidal one guy is a superhero so like how do you fit in under those circumstances it's impossible and that's like what being a kid feels like anyway i guess so if i'm gonna be really generous i'm gonna say that's the metaphor at the heart of the show i found a lot of like i was trying to be that generous too i was trying to be like considering what it might be trying to do for the kids like it's Is this about, because everything is so contextless as a child, like there's so many things happening that you just don't get an explanation for and you can ask all the questions you want about it, but people get annoyed giving you answers and you're like, you have to just learn to let a lot of stuff go and hope like maybe fuck, whatever that was will be explained to me later. And like, is that like why children find the meaningless random stuff so funny? And is that what the what the show is trying to do?

And I decided, no, it just sucks. Yeah. It just doesn't understand. Because even in the show's like, I don't know, Invader Zim or whatever that rely on the random humor, like, there is a placement within the universe. Yes. Like it, the stuff that pops up that's random is like, okay, there's like at least an aesthetic tie, like a visual tie to this. There's like some sort of logic why this should be here. Or it's addressed somehow.

Like maybe just like Zim. will react to it or say something. Like, it doesn't, meaningless madness doesn't flash by the screen and nobody acknowledges it. It's not just shapes, hurtling around, which is what this is. This is just shapes and colors. Well, and we keep calling it a children's show, which it is, but also it's extremely horny. I think it's more like- So horny.

It's really-and-dark. Yes. I think it's more like a teen show, but it seems like it should be a children's show. I don't know. Yes. That's like, I get that this would be, it's kind of the saved by the bell target, where it's like, sort of for teens, but why would teens watch this? Teens aren't actually watching this? Yeah.

But like, I have to assume, I'm generously assuming that their target audience was, I don't know, too. Because again, it's just colors and shapes making noises. Like, this is not going to teach child anything. If anything, your child is going to unlearn. language watching this? I mean, yeah, look at me. This clearly damaged me as a child. That's why we're here today. We're talking about it as your origin store. This is your, this is your ooze that fell in your sewer. But it's so is too. Like, I was explaining it to my husband. I'm like, I don't know. Everyone has a cool name, you know, Johnny Montana, Octavia, Vermont,

Violet Profusion is the principal. Like, there's just some really cool stuff about it that did stick with me, but it is, like, fucking insane. Yeah. I noticed early that they were already, like, replaying footage. Like, uh, yeah, during the opening, it was, I tried to write down things that were happening. Like, there was guys in biomedical safety equipment installing satellite TV in the suburbs. Then it cuts to Wizard.

And then the voiceover said, is the mom was doing something classified. I'm like, you know, I got to just stop keeping track of the weird shit happening. You can't do it. But then it cut to the exact B-roll from the theme song montage that I thought was so weird. And I made note that we're one minute, 24 seconds into the show, and it's recycling footage. And I thought, this is, this is going to be a bad show. So I, like, don't have a point of reference to, like,

maybe whatever Disney channel stuff, this may have even been referencing the skeleton of. So I already was, like, had no footing, but I already was very certain. This was low-quality bullshit, and I shouldn't try to find meaning. So, uh, anyway, that's where I was. I mean, supposedly the premise of the show is that the high school is built on top of Atlantis and strange things happened there, right?

They don't even mention that in the pilot. Yeah, that should be the theme song. Yeah. We know how to do that. Yep. You should say, hi, my name is Rubik, and I'm here from Atlantis to tell you that this place was built on the graves of my people. Yeah, and I'm going to tell you, they don't even get to that in the first four episodes

that I rewatch. There's no Atlantis until probably halfway through the season. So it's just hoping to like hook. children on context of madness long enough for them to be like yeah it's

it's where it's just Indian graves baby yep it's gonna end like poltergeist an implosion I took away from this

what what what's so strange about the vibe is like we we're doing a lost boys basically like the the kid is like a normal kid

and he's coming into this insane town because he's being dragged their by his mom and his mom's new job. And like, you're supposed to get that they're, that's, it has the natural creepiness of like early Disney child teen shows where you're like, oh, this vibe is really unsettling. None of these people are like real.

This doesn't look right. And they're playing with that. So like at first, at very first, you're like, I, I'm kind of on board with this. That's a good, that's a good, like, show to, you know, drill down into that. But then the mom is supposed to be the normal one. And the second she gets out of the car, she starts acting completely fucking insane. Like she's she's chewing on words.

She's making weird mouth shapes and like, not in a New Zealand way, just in a fucking weirdo way. And you're like, is she trying to, is it like, oh no, mom has been instantly corrupted by this place?

And like, I don't think so. I think she's, I think she's just a shit actress and a kid's sitcom. So we don't understand like you're trying to subvert. Because the normals have to play it different. Yeah, there's no, every single person in this show is the comic relief character,

except Giles. They all, they all think they are. And even he starts to get like infected by their energy. It's very, very pantomimey gestures. And you're like, you can't, you can't subvert this if everybody's like this. It just doesn't work. Yeah. I did write down some of the things that happened in that first scene. I said I wouldn't, but I couldn't really resist. So the mom, like, jumps into the arms of these weird hunks, and then, like, they carry her into a store. She didn't even say what store she was going to. She just gets out of the car and jumps into the arms of these strange men in a way no one has ever jumped into anyone's arms. Like, they did a gesture, and I'm like, I don't know what that means. She's like, oh, I know what

this means. I'm going to sit on your elbows. It's fucking crazy. Then there's a hunk cop. about the human hunk chair. Right. There's no questions. Some hunk cop was waving people across the street, and then the woman behind him was just like petting his haunches. I made a note of that. An old man is in a crate, like, looking around,

and then we find out he's the grandpa of the child on top of the car. Yes. Again, so you were this fucking weird before coming to town, so this is not a weird town. Like, that's what you've just done. You've just suburb the whole thing. The whole thing is off. Yeah.

There's also a UFO that we've cut to a few times now. There's a five-star Navy Admiral in the bushes watching the main character. And then there's a robot plant that's watching it. There's like a surveillance flower that's... I took a clip of the mother saying goodbye to the boy at high school. Maybe this will help explain things. Well, son, here you go. So you're not going to come with me to the principal's office?

Oh, no. schools give me the creeps. You got raging hormones, peer pressure bullies, and that's just the teachers. Mom, see you later, son. Make me proud of you. So I just wanted you to like hear how the punchlines of the show land. And then like they'll bounce back from that with just like madness.

Did she say make me proud of you? I don't know. And in just in tradition with this show, we're not even going to comment on the sound effects having you various times inside laser beam and underwater. Like, all of that happened in one scene. Yeah. Like, what, why is the, where is the robot dentist?

Why am I, why am I in a jacuzzi? What's, what's happening? And everyone behind them is, like, posing for pictures where there are no cameras. It's just, like, just doing weird poses. Or there's, like, army men in the background with, um, little metal detectors at all times. Whenever they show the school, there's army men with metal detectors in the background and just nobody says anything. And they're wearing camo, but it's like bright blue. Yeah. It's a lot having. Our guy gets so much. And our guy like gets immediately ambushed by a girl with a beard.

And she's like exploiting feminism to strong arm and to donating to some like kind of anti-lady shaving charity. It's felt like a really mean joke, but about what and whose expense? Like it just felt like a handful of sarcasm sand slipping through my hands. Like, I just didn't, I didn't get it. But it felt like a joke or like, God, who dick wrote that? But I don't know about who.

Yeah, a lot of times I just assumed I caught myself trying to assume, like, like I do when I'm watching, I don't know, something from another culture, an anime or something. I'll assume like, oh, I didn't understand that. That must be a reference to like their life or folklore

culture that I just don't have the background. to understand, but it can't be every second of the show, because there was not a solid second of this show that I didn't think, oh, well, that must be a reference to something. I don't, oh, that must be, that also must be a reference. There's like 25 references to things I don't understand in this scene. Or like things that they're setting up for later, and then, no, it's they're not. It's just, it's just happening. Like, especially in this episode, you meet so many characters all in the row and every character

has a thing, and they're all very different from each other. So it's like you meet the girl who has a poltergeist attached to her. You meet Johnny Montana, the most popular boy in school, and the girl who's obsessed with him, Sabrina. And her thing is just jealousy, and she, like, cuts off a girl's pigtail because the girl is fanning him and feeding him grapes. And, like, that's their intro. Yeah, that was fucking weird.

I actually have a clip of that, too. Oh, thanks. I really appreciate the help. Oh, that's okay. My shrink says I should reach out to more people. Why, you, um, you'd seen a drink. Oh, yeah, just for stuff. Look, that's Josh Montana. He's the head boy. Hi, Josh. Hey, Sophie. How's the poltergeist?

And that's Sabrina. She's crazy about Josh. A little bit jealous, even. I hate you. Hi, Sophie, how's the Poteguise? I see, you said, you know, Poulterguise attached. I heard them say that probably eight times. I didn't know they were saying Poultergeist. I was like, oh, Poldergice, that must be a New Zealand, like, fucking sandwich spread or something. That's a New Zealand dish.

By this point, I think I was assuming that they just took New Zealand babies and drowned them each for like 10 minutes a day. And that's why this show is so fucking crazy. I was willing to believe anything to explain this show. You didn't get Poultergeist where they got to ex-orgasms? Yeah, I was waiting for that clip. I took a clip of that too, yeah, let's play that. You have a Poldegice. Oh, don't be silly, there's no such thing.

At least, that's what my shrink says, and he's much nicer than the priest. I'm the priest. Oh, sure. He used to do ex-orgasms with me. I'm done you mean now It's all the songs No That's way too

That's way dark for this show Like there's There's I know you're supposed to like Throw in a little something for the adults But like I want to give my favorite example Which is animaniacs

And the fingerprints joke Where they say like Dot Dot get fingerprints And she runs off screen Comes back with prints And he's like No I said fingerprints

And she goes like I don't think he'd like that Like the kids aren't going to get it But adults do and it's fine That's not what this is She looks straight into the camera and is like My priest just don't fuck me What

Danger Room style Yeah The kid is going to have some questions At the very least mommy what's orgasms She says What kind of ex orgasms Oh yeah yeah That's when

That's when Professor X puts on cerebral And Oh that's something priest's too Yeah Totally normal. Don't worry about it. What the fuck? I mean, she does reveal later that at least the priest is dead, so.

The polter. Yeah, the polter guys killed the priest. Apparently for molesting her, I guess. It's just, way too dark. Relentless insanity. Every fucking moment is just like a little vignette waiting for us to walk by it so it can start and end. And like, Josh Montana was like the worst of that. because everyone involved in the scene was doing like a little play and I don't know.

And they're all independent. Like she snips off that pigtail and the girl doesn't care. She doesn't react to it at all. Yeah. Doesn't flinch. I looked up that actress. That was a 25-year-old woman named Lauren Horsley that cut off that pig tail. I was fun fact.

I was like, that woman is like 40 years old when I was looking at her. Yeah, not a 25 that can play a teen. She's like a 25-year-old woman who, like, was on her second kid. Yeah, she, like, a very sun-tanned and, like, cigarette-smoking 25-year-old playing the most popular girl in school. Yeah, lovely lady. Don't want to be a dick. I'm just saying, you couldn't play a high school child in 2002. Yeah.

Other than that, a classic beauty. It's a Rizzo from Greece situation. Yeah. Sorry, I keep interrupting, Brockway. What were you trying to say? No, it's just. it was something you said earlier I was just like

I think you said it was a it's like a parody but it's it's a parody of what like yeah if you ask the if you ask the guy ask somebody who made this oh okay

what is this parody he would have no choice but to shrug and like gesture all around him in general it's a general the world the world man like no you have to have like

you have to have a source there has to be a source you're pulling from to get this and you're pulling from absolutely nothing and like I wanted I wanted to like even as we're talking about it I won't like it I want to like it I want to like a lot right even as we're talking about it I want to like I like the idea of everything going like crazy wrong in the background and you're just not focusing on that but like it again it has to tie in to it has to do something yeah it's a lot of bikinis and madness which are two of my favorite

things. Right? Yeah, but it's missing the essential, like, basic human logic chain, where you should be doing those vignettes and then they all tie somehow, even if it's just to give a vibe, but they're all giving different vibes

to the extent that I don't know anybody actually told any of those actors to do stuff. They probably just said, do something weird, and everybody did whatever the fuck they wanted. Yeah, it could totally be. I mean, it's just, it's kind of like Beverly Hills 90210 meets

like alias or something there's a bunch of spy shit going on like it has a lot of really interesting things but it's just really bad. You ever seen Cool as Ice? No. Okay, well it's a lot like Cool as Ice. Like if the set designer from Cool as Ice

was just allowed to go mad with like a trapper keeper designer like that feels like the world they've built and then they got the same five extras and just said do the fucking weirdest shit you've ever done there and then there and then there follow the actors around and running their path

and just pose for something insane have we mentioned at any point that we've cut away sometimes and they're just cling on demons watching one of this like that's the audience for this show yeah because like I think the main what ends up being like the main

thing going on is that there's these aliens that are around Atlantis High considering like coming and joining humanity but never leaving their spaceship because that's a cool set and they don't want to lose it. So they're just in their spaceship

for the entire season. And then there's like three or four different groups of spies all like tracking the aliens and the students and there's an apocalypse to they kind of introduce...

I want to like that. I want to like it as we're talking about it. They introduced like all of the villains at once in this episode except for Lucifer who's the actual devil who's like a big antagonist that you never get you see him i think in the pilot yeah i know like the devil is in this show it'd be so fun but yeah like they don't make it to him which is shocking since they make it to literally everything else in the pilot yeah it's hard to like

because like just shit'll happen like a flower pot will break and you're like oh what's what's happening here and then like five more will break and then some will levitate around you're like oh so it's just like nothing just like i shouldn't have noticed that like there's no there wasn't a point to it yeah you're always punished for catching one of the easter eggs you're like oh i saw that in the background i wonder how that's going to come back oh i that the jokes on me i should not have wondered that yeah like there's a there's a child he walks into a classroom and there's just the hanging feet of a dead child oh my god i didn't notice that yes that was so weird is there lydia i did i did want to ask you like that's just

a dead child right that can't be anything else they could be like did they reveal later that like Like there's a... Okay. They never come back to it. They never come back to it. No, he walks in the door and then like in the foreground, a child's feet are just gently swinging in the air. Like with the cadence, the visual shorthand for they have hanged themselves. And then you're like, oh, you're going to cut back and reveal that he's doing pull-ups or something.

No. They never come back to that. You're just like, that's fucking dark. That's crazy. It's a crazy thing to do. It's like a four-game writer. room joke like what if one of the kids just dead just hanging dead and someone else's like oh my god that's crazy i'm writing that down and then they never like checked later if that was a sane idea

like there's a disco couple in the front of the classroom like slow dancing like romantically falling in love next to the professor uh who's just like the standard like german like abrid Einstein type guy uh but yeah they're just falling in love while this dead kid hangs from the ceiling And then, like, some girl brings him a mouse and he eats it, like, fucking V, the final battle style. Yeah, it's fucking madness. The poltergeist girl brings him a mouse, like, as if it's an apple to give a teacher and he eats it.

Yeah, he eats it. And he's an alien. We find out eventually, and he can control people by it. We find out hearing zaps him with fucking mind eyes. He's like, whoa! He shoots him with eye lasers. He had the mind eyes in the pilot, yeah. Yeah.

See, I'll even, I'll even give him credit. Like, if he turns out to be an alien later, okay, this, this is fine to do the mouse thing, to do the mind-eyes thing. Let's go back to the hanged child. Yep. Because that's one of those things you need to give the, oh, he was an alien context for. Like, oh, this is a child who can fly, but is not very good at it or something. Like, you need to do something. Let's talk about the couple falling in love at the front that nobody's commenting on.

What's up with them? I think like in that classroom they always do weird shit and I don't know if it's like that's the same classroom where the kid was weightlifting the tortoise and there was a kid getting a full massage I think Josh Montana at one point is just up on the table getting a full shirtless massage from somebody Hell yeah

I like when he came in because he'd have a way better massage than my priest am I right? All right everybody? He comes and he gives it gives a girl a nudge she gets up and he sits in her chair and then she sits back down on his lap and I was like that's okay like that's like a parody of something right that's the big man on campus doing something that seems insane I'm like I get that I understand that's sane you know uh but a dead kid hanging from the ceiling it's like you need to you need to fucking button that with a joke right like maybe like cut away and like the previous class was like a really

depressing topic and he killed himself you're like okay well at least now we know it yeah at least a context there's at least a joke yeah you can't just throw a dead kid hanging in the foreground. I think I jumped us ahead talking about the classroom because we missed his conversation with Violet Profusion, the principal, and her assistant, which isn't really important, but he does learn that the one big rule of the school

is that you're not allowed to have, oh my God, how do I put it? It's like gendered, cheap, child labor-made underwear. Right. Yeah. Because this show is just fucking madlips. Like little horny 13-year-old madlib. and he wrote fucking panties in all the blanks.

That's one of those, we've got the he was an alien thing again. Like, okay, you explain that. And the show thinks it explains it. Well, like, at the end, I don't want to jump ahead. But the show's like, oh, okay, that's what was going on. But it doesn't at all. Like, we'll get there, but it's. But the panties are central to the plot of the rest of the episode.

They're so central to the plot. But it's like, why would that be a rule at the school? and it's just never explained. It just is the rule. Because, yeah, now we find out, like, he's ostracized because they find some furry panties in his bag. And everyone's like, hey, you can't have furry panties. And he's like, hey, I didn't.

Those aren't mine. And they're like, now they don't believe him. And so, God, so they all hate him, but then he feeds an apple to the girl who can't have apples. Yes. And she flips the fuck out. Who has not been established before this? Like, we meet this girl, and then those,

show is like, you know what? This girl can't have apples. Oh, he gave her an apple. What the fuck? What are you doing? Would you believe it if I said she becomes one of the three main characters of the show? Absolutely. Yeah, I would because nothing means anything.

They explain that she is enraged by fresh food. And that's the explanation for the joke that just happened, which is that she flies into a rage and runs off after you gave an apple. And they're like, oh, she's enraged by fresh food. end of explanation. You're like, was that the punchline? Is that... It says it makes her criminally insane,

which is like, it feels like something a really green writer would write, like a really overwritten joke that, that I don't know. Again, like, little moments like that makes me realize, like, oh, the people who made this were untalented, not insane.

Like, this is, see, it made me, this is one of the ones that made me think like, maybe, okay, at the time, Because New Zealand's kind of an island, and I know, like, Hawaii has a lot of problems getting, like, fresh produce and stuff to it beyond, like, what they can actually grow there. And so, like, childhood nutrition is, like, a really big deal.

Is this, like, is this, like, them talking about, like, the larger logistics of childhood malnutrition on living in, like, an isolated community? Like, that's how far my mind has to go. And then the guy comes up and he's like, no, she's enraged by fresh food. See, I thought she was going to... Oh, I'm the asshole for giving you the credit. I thought at some point she was going to be revealed to be like an android or something, because she kind of dresses like always in like silver and blue. Like a lot of characters, they dug a lot of characters.

Like Octavia Vermont always wears purple. Jets always in silver and blue and she has like a blue wig. So I was like, oh, is she going to be an android or an alien? No. She's always just drinking chemicals? Yeah, she drinks straight chemicals. I just wrote robot girl Like there's nothing

Nothing about her said anything other than robot girl to me Like it's crazy that she's not an android Add that to the list of things that piss me off She should be angry It's like you should If you were doing that Then it's fine but you didn't You didn't do anything with it

Instead of that you chose to just be like Oh I forgot I forgot we did that Why are you bringing that up? They fill our guys locker with trash But he also finds a secret passageway And, uh, lady, do you know what this, what it led to, what the cinematic term for this is? Uh, yeah, I think it's called a porkies. That's exactly.

It leads to a fucking porkies hole. I'm so glad. I'm so glad you know what a porkees hole is. I've never seen porkies, but I know of porkies. And I was like, are they fully doing a porkies in the pilot for this show that I watched when I was like 12 years old? They did a porkeys. And the answer is yes. They do a porkies.

at the, and they're watching, uh, watching naked children. Watching a child to have a shower. Uh, so our guy is a sex criminal. Uh, he doesn't like say, oh, no, I shouldn't be looking at this. He's like, oh, fuck yeah, naked girl. Yeah, they're never like punished for it or the, it's not like you shouldn't do this. The show, as far as the show's concerned, you just found something that kicks ass. Yeah, it starts off like a joke because he also finds another boy at the Porky's Hole.

And that boy later revealed to be an alien is obsessed with things that are, Oh, God, this sounds, I hate this. He's obsessed with things that are round, and he's like, there's a lot of round things in the shower, and it shows the shower head, but we all kind of know that that's not, like, what it's referring to. And then, like, they do that bit where he's like, that's just a showerhead. It's not a UFO. And he's like, oh, okay. And then he's like, oh, my gosh, there are naked girls in there.

And then they, like, both, like, fight to look in the hole again at the naked girls once the boy realizes that there are naked girls. I took a clip of this, but I don't know if I should play it. It's like a minute long and just crushingly insane. Oh, I'll tell you what, I'll play it, and we can decide if Jamie should cut it later. Nope. I'll do anything you want. First thing he says. He gets caught looking in the hole.

He says, I'll do anything you want. Rainy? Listen, no one can know about this. They'll think I'm weird. They don't know really? I'm sorry. I can tell you where the G string came from As long as you promised nuts tell anyone that I was here

Okay, yeah, deal Go to this address Don't let anyone see you Well, you got fucking Donnie Elfman back there just going insane I can't here to enjoy the flying saucers It's a good score Because I see them in my dreams They have them here

It's working so hard The whole orchestra watching this scene Yeah, nothing in this scene It has anything to do with this Soundtrack Look up It's a chelheed

You're right Hey They got naked girls in there Uh that one of the two boys in that scene is later revealed to be at least 36 years old. He's been in high school for 36 years. Oh. Oh, that does make it worse.

It was already 10 out of 10 bad, but, oh, Jesus Christ. That's the very complicated and compelling score for a 36-year-old man peeping at a naked child. Donnie Elfman back there, just conducting as hard as he can. So it's really getting easy to see why I am the way that I am. Yeah, this makes sense now. Yep. It's very funny to me of you, to think, of you coming to school, because it used to be, I mean, before really the internet took off and was everywhere, which is later than you assume. It used to be that you had such a monoculture.

Like, you come to school and talk about the show that was on. You come talk about Buffy or something, and people would know what you were saying, and that's what you did. And then they're talking about Buffy, and you're like, yeah, did you see this? the one with the 36-year-old alien and he thought it was the shower head but it was really titty. He's like, this chick's fucking crazy, man. Yep.

Like, none of that exists. I went and looked. I went and looked on every channel that she said that played on. It was not there. Yep. That was by junior high years. All eight people in your high school knew you were mad.

There were 50 in my class. Oh, shit. No wonder you were exiled from the village. Yeah. Yeah, they wanted me out as soon as I finished the trial of fire. How'd you doing the trial of fire? Mid. Mid, or I'd be there running the village.

Were you able to pick up the Kroll blade? Oh, yeah, obviously. Okay, good. So our guy got the address from the guy, the source of the G-string. So we have kind of a plot now, thanks to these panties. And he goes there and he immediately gets seen. Like, he forgets all about this being a stealth miss. He just goes in broad daylight and gets seen.

But it just gets, it gets weirder. The bearded girl comes out there and he asks her for a ride. And she refuses because he might shave or support shaving. And then the quarterback is there, Josh Montana, and he's in a shiny pink superhero costume. And I don't know. I just, I feel like there's some kind of radiation leak in the plot and also like in the, in New Zealand. I'm just waiting for them to make a joke or an observation or even to point out. It takes them a very long time in the scene

to even point out like, oh, you're in a superhero outfit because they just start talking him like he's a guy. He's doing a superhero thing and like they were not looped into that at the start of that scene. And they're like, I'm going to make the decision to treat him like a normal man.

No, that's fucking crazy that you're doing that. There's also a radiation leak that I think they forgot to tell us about. I might have just been bad in my notes. No, they did not. Okay. So we knew about the radiation leak here

at this scene or? No, no. Like, they did not tell us about that. Oh, they didn't tell us. Okay. This was never before mentioned. Yeah. Because this is now the plot.

And this is now the plot like with, I don't know, eight minutes left in the show. The show decides like, oh, fuck, we need a plot. Right. Well, other than the Panties. They're like, you know what, this Panties plot? This is not great. I think we need something bigger. There's a radiation leak now.

Okay. Right. I forgot Panties was the A plot. I forgot it was supposed to be a plot at all. So, now there's a bomb set to go off. They track the radiation. No, they don't talk about radiation.

They track it by fruit skins because the robot girl has been eating fruit and led this trail to her because she's the one who knows how to, got, the key. It's like, it's frustratingly close to kind of a story. Like a bedtime story you would tell to a child after a radiation leak destroyed your mind. But like one thing leads to another at this point in the. plot. She gets a tiny nuke. She gets a really cute nuclear bomb. Like this, it looks like a Nickelodeon teen choice order. Again, because she was fed an apple. Yes. Because she was fed an apple, she somehow acquires a nuclear bomb and sets it to go off and destroy the school. And we haven't

even mentioned Octavia Vermont, the heroine of the show, always wears purple. Uh, she's secretly a spy, a teen spy. And she, he sees her, Giles sees her in the very beginning and is instantly like, oh my God, he says the weirdest thing. He's like, I'm so in love with her. I would sled down Everest naked with a cactus or something on a cactus. Something real stupid, yeah. Yeah, he's in love with her. There's a moment here that's weird when she shows up and like the robot girl can see that our hero is like in love with her. And so she looks right to the camera and like gags herself with a finger. And I feel like she's a little plain. I mean, I mean, I don't want to be a dick.

But it seems excessive to stop the whole show to say, yuck, this bitch, right? Like, that's too much, right? Yeah, and like Jet Marigold, the robot girl, constantly breaks the fourth wall, like, Jim from the office. And she's, like, the only one. I don't know if it's because she's a robot or what? There's a part here I came really close to liking where she was trying to tell them where the key was, but she's farting too hard. No one can hear her. Yes.

So, like, I'm like, sure, okay, I'm kind of on board. But you're never going to guess where the key is in a crate of panties. Because the show is just horny baby, madlips. And they find it. The crate of panties in the, just in the bathroom, taking up most of the bathroom that they have forgot to mention. Right. Like, the camera pans over and it's like, oh, yeah, of course, there's the crate of panties in the bathroom that we've been working around this whole time. Which is the only illegal thing in this world of lunacy is this one single crate of child labor panties.

Like they treat it like it's a callback, but a callback has to call back to something. It's not just calling backward in like the general in time. It's not calling to the past as if to say, please come forward the past. It's supposed to be too a thing that you have established before. But you never established what the pay. panties were, why the panties were that way, you're just like, yeah, here's the panties. Oh, we're calling back to the panties. It's like, it's like trying to start a conversation on a road trip by just saying things that you pass. Like you, oh, there's telephone pole. Oh, another telephone pole.

Oh, there's another telephone pole. Yeah, fuck you. It's not a callback. You're just saying the thing again. Yeah, it's, um, I don't know. I, they're trying to tie all the plots together and just not doing a good job of it. No. But they never made any plots. There's sort of a plot. The plot is sort of about the panties and sort of about nuclear bombs. And sort of about him, his first day in high school, in Atlanta's High. I at least, I'll give you half of a plot on the nuclear bombs.

I at least understand you don't want the bomb to go off. Sure. Like that's the base level of storytelling that I'm going to be happy about. The people don't want to die. I at least understand that. That's more than the panties storyline has. That was absolutely nothing. Like, I kept forgetting that was happening because it was such nothing.

The show actually takes that away. I just realized that the panties plot gets completely undone because our heroine kisses the guy in the mouth and then he falls into the box of underpants. And then everyone comes in and they're like, look at all these fucking sweet panties. And they're like, right, remember, we can't have these. That's like our one rule of our town. And they're like, what if we didn't have? that rule, and we could just grab the random panties from under this really horned-up young boy.

Yeah. Let me get the underwear. This nerd went swimming in. That's what I want. The principal of the school comes in and is like, oh, these are my panties. And they're like, you're not allowed to have the panties. And then when she says like, okay, I'm just going to change that rule. And then she says to her students, her simple group of students, grab what you need.

Yes. Grab all the slutty panties you want, children. An assault. You've got to entice those priests. That's a callback. That's how you do a callback. We establish that you fuck priests. Comedy exorgasm.

And this is why I am the way I am. Wow. It's so telling, but also not at all. Like, I don't think this will help anyone understand anything at all. And I think it's perfect. Yeah. Yeah, this did not help, Lydia. Nope.

I think it's, there's elements that are things that I still find funny to this day. I actually really liked some of the jokes in the pedophile extras a bit. 1,900, Frankfurt. 1,900, Frankfurt. Our podcast can't. And with maximal in show.

Talk Frankfurt podcast? Correct. Yeah. The craft is nitratis, not un. Shicked you in the hunde zone four an hour and a stunder. Come Sean, you kids to do ma.

1,900, Frankfurt 1,900, Frankfurt 1,900, Frankfurt 1,000 new, you knew, yeah. Yeah, 9,000! Please welcome once again 1,900 hot dogs very own in-house comic The overly specific insult comedian who makes things to real.

It's Mr. Jimmy Juggles. Hey, thank you, thank you. It's lousy to be here. Got a lot of Supremes in the audience tonight. Look at Aaron Crosston here. Hey, you look like you don't get enough colonoscopies. Like you're going to die of ass cancer. at 54 just when you start really getting comfortable with who you are oh what's a matter a little too real for you

yeah i know i'm working on that hey i see adrian hissbrook hey i see alex nolanberg look at this it's alpha scientist jovo hey and andy i see you back there i once went on safari with this guy and i watched him kill a white rhino so he could powder and snort its horn. He was so sad when it did not give him an erection. I wasn't supposed to tell nobody that. Oh, it's a very serious crime. Oh, oh. Hey, it's Armando Nava. I see Autumn Armstrong Berg. I see Bim Talser. Oh, Brandon Garlock, I know you ain't got enough in your retirement fun. You're blowing it all on Funko Pops of obscure movie monsters and your elderly self is gonna curse you for it oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh that one's a sprinkler it was supposed to be a sprinkler it's summer i'm trying something

brian sailor i see you there brockway famously loves the meat millie hey sarah i'd see chloe here she got a face only a mother could love could but did not oh ho ho keep seeking that validation for camgirls and escorts babe that's you that's what you do that's not me why would you think that's me that's you i only say true stuff about you like uh like uh like a common sense here he looked like he got one of those ironic names like calling common sense's mother mrs had a positive influence on common sense's body dysmorphia whoa hey come on it's just a joke there's no truth to it and don't mean nothing about neither of us. Alright, I don't wish I was a small, frail, pale man, racked by consumption. Like, that's, I'm happy being big and healthy.

That's what I like. That's what I like, don't question it. Here's Craig Lemoyne, let's move on, here's Craig Lemoyne, I see Dan B, I see David Scholl. I see Dean Costello, I love this guy. Dean Costello, he once watched someone, he loved Drown, and he was too scared to help him. So he sold the song rights to Phil Collins. You guys got to stop trusting me with your secrets. Oh, sorry, I hiccoughed while doing that one.

And it came out weird. That won't happen again. Delta, Fox Trot, Devin the Rogue Supreme, Doug Redmond, Dusty's rad title, Edgar Matthias, you look like you find comfort at night by telling yourself nobody remembers the embarrassing stuff you did. But I've heard it, it's all anybody talks about. Oh, back to normal O's.

Oh, it was a one-time fluke. Just like all your exes say about you, Elizabeth Shope. Oh, ho! All right, I see Elliot Watson here. He's all right. I'm all right, too. I'm glad I got my normal O's back. I was not just testing the waters for a new and scary change

that I desperately want to make in my life. Not like Eric Christian Berg. Look at that. Ball cap, they call this the receding hairline special. Oh! I got Fancy Shark. I got Garrett. I got Jelloho.

I got good Satan and all his hot witches over here. Oh, look at this. It's Greg Cunningham. Greg Cunningham, you work so much. Your kids are going to have trouble remembering your face after they leave for college. Oh! That one's about you. That's not about something haunting my kids said to me.

All this stuff's about you. You guys, hey Haraka, a Harvey Pangweenie. Oh, I'd love to see you here, honk. Hey, Jabberal Aiden, James Boyd, I got Jared Clack, I got Jared Mountain Man. Oh, I got Jared Ruiz. Hold on. Jared Ruiz here, he's gonna wait until everyone's gone for the night. And then he's gonna go around and lick all the seats of the people who didn't laugh at my jokes.

That's what he's gonna do. Oh, he likes the taste of failure. This guy does, not me. Jeff O'Raskey, John McCam, and I got John Minkoff. Hey, you smell like extramarital sex, my man. Everyone can smell it. Even your wife there next to you. She just don't have the courage to disrupt her whole life

because she don't know. She's worth 10 of you because she's too fucking stupid. Oh, I got you both. Oh, I'm sorry there was again. That's weird. I don't know what's going on with that. Okay, I got I got Joseph Searle's here I got Josh S I got Joshua Graves

I got Justin B I got Ken Paisley I got K&M Hey K&M your AI girlfriend called just kidding no she didn't Oh there we go that's the normal one that's okay everything's normal I'm not learning nothing about myself up here Okay, okay we got Kamutsas we got KVH we got Lane Heygood we got Lisa Lisa worries she's the weird girl at work because she never gets invited to nothing. Don't worry, Lisa. They don't think you're weird. They don't think about you at all.

Oh, normal one again. All right, we got it, we got it. Amjahy Chappelle, Mark Mahoney, Matt Riley, Max Barroy, mercenary, Sissadman, Michael Lair, a Mojou, you carry yourself like you're not the hero in your own story. Oh, that one seems gentle at first, It will haunt you. Some things.

They just haunt you. Uh, Mort. I got Mort here. I got Mr. Bob Gray. I got ND. What does ND stand for, non-descript? Oh. That one's on purpose.

It's a callback to that thing I did earlier. I'm owning it, okay? I'm owning it. It's just a joke. Neil Bailey, Neil Bailey liked that, oh, right? Right? Neil Bailey liked it. He likes that pop stuff, am I right?

Ha ha ha, I hate that stuff. He loves it, though. Neil Schaefer. I got Neku104. I got Nick Levino. I got obsolete over here. Now obsolete. He's like Neil Bailey. This is someone who wants to prance about in a powdered wig. I can see it. I can see it obsolete. Oh, that's me doing an impression. That's an impression of obsolete. That's not me. Ornry Weevil. I got Ozzie Olin. I got Patrick Herbst. I got Peewee's uncle. I got rebrandrew. I got red wine time. Red wine time probably got a secret storage unit full over. ruffled shirts and tights sometimes they sleep in there just to be physically closer to the person they think they are inside oh that's what you do that's what you do red wine time hey rhea i got russell bowman i got sam copnik i got sarkovsky look at sean chase i got seed over here hey

space jam fan space jam fan now this is a guy who sees an old-timey fop or dandy put on his white face makeup and paint the little mole on and he's like oh that's me that's me that's That's the way I wish I was. Oh, I got you. I know that's how you are. Hey, spotty reception. A super knot. Tater's Tales.

Thomas Cavatzos. Oh, who do we got here? You know how sometimes you can see a man? You take one look at him and you just know. You just know. This guy? This guy likes to titter. I got you, Thomas.

I got your tittering ass. Timmy Leahy, Toasty God, Tommy G. Velo, Victor Malavankin, Booster. Oh, don't sink down. in your seat now booster i see you i got you i know you you think you're some strong independent woman but i know you're tight i know you're tight you live your whole life just hoping oh you're just praying some big strong man comes along and calls one of your quips ribald that's you that's what you hope happens that has nothing to do with me i can just see it on your face

Waylon Russell, Yvonne Clappaham, Zach and Ava, I'm looking at John Dean here. And I just know this guy sees old-timey fops and dandies in movies and he don't know. He don't know. Are they a German thing? Are they French or English or something? Are they just kind of all Europe rolled together into like one stereotype that maybe never existed at all? But that don't matter to John Dean because every time he sees them boys mincing and Branson, he thinks, that's me.

That's not the me I am, but is the me I should be. And he goes, and he becomes an insult comment, because that's what they say the men do. That's what they say the modern-day man equivalent is of that. But it just unfulfilled, you know, it doesn't, it's not enough for John Dean. He thinks, he's like, I'm Oscar Wilde up here, you know, telling it like it is, and everybody, everybody laughs and joins in and calls me pretty. And it never quite happens that way. Does it, John Dean? It's not the same thing being an insult comic as it is,

being a real, being a fop with a savage wit. I see you, John Dean, all over your face, man. It's all over your face that you wish that was what you were. That's you. That's what you are. It's a joke. It's all a joke. It's just, there's no truth to it.

There's no truth to it, man. Oh.