The Dogg Zzone by 1900HOTDOG - Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 54, The Ultimate Zombie Thing, with David Bell!
Episode Date: December 22, 2021Seanbaby tasks Brockway and special guest David Bell with an impossible task: Make the ultimate zombie movie on the fly, in about an hour, and by committee. God damn. God damn it. God damn it all... t...hey succeeded!
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9000
Welcome to the dog zone
9000, the official weekly podcast
For the 1-900 HOT DOG daily website
I'm the internet's Sean Baby
And I'm happy to introduce my co-host
Bobby the Brain Brockway
I'm Robert Brockway, here's a Brockway fact
I named a part of the moon
And I bet you could guess which one
If I allowed follow up questions
Which I don't
I'm just gonna say butthole
It's not even a question, I know it's a butthole
Dammit
We're joined by film expert and funny man
From Gamefully Unemployed
David Bell
Hello, hi
Hey, welcome
It's fantastic to have you
I know that you're in the middle of a
Hardcore writing crunch
So thanks for taking time to
Come talk about this stupid shit with us
I do some word writing
Spoken word writing
Is what this is
That's what we're gonna do
Yeah, that's what we call it
I've been writing all day
So I'm a little
Out of it
Which should be fun
I didn't have you guys
Prep anything
It's
God, how do I explain this? Zombies
But zombies
So the three of us
We've been appointed as Council of Zombie
And we're in charge of making difficult
High concept decisions for the genre
We're basically gonna redesign the genre
The best way by committee
It always works great
It always works great
I didn't invent the idea, of course
Other famous examples of art by committee
Are Mack and me
Ready Player One, which was a human idea
Designed by committee
Both perfect films
No notes on any of those films
I think we all agreed that was great art
So we're gonna kill it today
We're gonna kill it. You guys have been training your whole life for this
Even though
We all come here today mostly unprepared
Entirely unprepared, sir
Entirely, entirely
Is there anything you'd like to plug at the top of the show here, David?
Oh
We might just fucking cut out in the middle of
Something's ainty
Oh, right. That's your jam. You love doing that
Um
I guess I'll plug Gamefully Unemployed
You already mentioned it
That's Patreon.com
Gamefully Unemployed
That's a podcast network myself and Tom
Ryman do
And that's it
Now a 1900 Hot Dog columnist
Of 1900 Hot Dog fame
Yeah, 1900 Hot Dog fame
Yeah, he's great
He's always been on the show
We're great on the show
We're all great
We're all great
Good job everybody
Yeah, and now I know that I obviously make jokes
About the dangers of designing by committee
But this is, um, I want to tell a real story
About a time I was involved
In something like that
It's gonna be real short
I promise it will not take 35 minutes
Like most of my stories, but it was my first job out of college
And I was in an ad agency
And I was one half of the creative department
So the company commissioned a thing
They called Z-Thing
Which was a great name for it because it was just meant to be a thing
Like a way to sneak ads through the back door
Of shareable content
This was early in this
But as Z-Thing
Z-Thing was what they called it
It ended up being a software program
That could move an animated gif across a small area
While it played a MIDI song
I swear Christ, I'm not making it up
The technology
I was like, this is bad
This is not great
So we were tasked to make something viral
In quotes
And that was, um
Like what we had to work with
Oh my god
This was so important
I miss those days when people were just like
When a marketing guy would show up
And say like, I have a great idea
Something viral
Yes, that was the idea
So we had an important creative meeting
And again, that was just me and one other guy
But we had to meet with everyone in the company
So with tech and sales and all hands on deck
You get it
So everyone was there for this important brainstorming meeting
And within minutes or maybe seconds
They locked in on Star Wars
They're like locked the fuck in on Star Wars
So they're like, people like Star Wars
But they need something else, right?
Something maybe
It means one other thing
And then it'll be perfect
They decided on MP3s
Because this was like the year 2000
They were hot at the time
So the top dozen minds
In Bleeding Edge, Portland, Oregon
Digital advertisement
Through the full weight of their creativity
At something about Star Wars and MP3s
And viral
30 minutes later MP3PO
Was born
Not what he did
Or why someone would share him
Simply that, just the name MP3PO
And like obviously
To my core offensive
Like this fucking punny bullshit
But I also think I might have specifically had
On my website at the time like jokes
About the kind of person
Who might come up with MP3PO
Like I might have had those exact words
How could you not?
And so
The whole meeting I was fighting against
And I'm like, no, this is terrible
You've got to stop this
And not just because it sucked
But because I knew it would be my job to fucking make it
And I was just helpless against
The tidal wave of committee
There was maybe 10 or 11 other people
I could not steer them away from MP3PO
And that is us today
We are definitely in the process
Of making MP3PO
So that's our team name
We're going to make a team name, of course
And then our team name is MP3PO
I love it, I love it
So with that
With full certainty
That this
Zombie Court
Or as they say in regular court
Zombie Court is now in begin start
Good one
Good job, Zombies
To explain again
Basically I'm going to give AB testing
To a lot of zombie tropes
And we're going to decide to three of us
Which one we're picking
Has to be a hard binary decision
There's going to be some tough decisions
There might be some easy decisions
Okay, I have a question
Are we making a physical zombie
Like a character
Are we making a movie
What are we making
What is our banner
Are we making an apocalypse
Are we just going to try to end this
End it all
I think that's what's going to happen
We're trying to make the perfect zombie movie
Using the best individual decisions
Whenever there's like
Two paths to take
We're going to pick a path
Those branching paths designed by committee
Are going to lead us to
What theoretically should be the greatest zombie movie ever
That's what we're doing
Okay
With full caveat that it's not going to work
Zombie PO
So we're going to end up with
First prompt
The most obvious one
Are we doing fast zombies or slow zombies
Mmm
So start with you David
What are your thoughts on fast vs slow zombies
Any reference to our rich zombie culture
Right
This is tough
Because
Not knowing what the
Like later decisions are going to be
It feels like this decision
Is going to affect the next and so on
And so forth
I always liked the rule
And this is
Not, okay
So you're giving me this
This very binary choice
But I always liked the rule
That zombies maintain
The speed and strength
Of the people that they've
Infected
Meaning
What about the disabilities
Of the person they affected
Everything across the board
So my zombie
Yeah, my zombie is not going to do much
My zombie is mostly just going to sit in a corner
And be like oh
Oh yeah, my zombie is just going to
Lie down mostly
But
You're asking faster slow
I think we should go
With the classic
And start with slow
I love it
I was hoping to disagree with you
I'm sorry
My reasoning is that
I don't know, I just like it better
Like a fast zombie is cool
But
The original
I feel like the original idea of zombies
Was
Sort of like a slow creeping terror
Like the idea
It's like human tide
Yeah, exactly
It's a slow wave that like
Yes, you can board up your house
But eventually they're going to get in
It's all about the fact that you do have time
To get away
And then
You know, contemplate your next action
So I'm going with slow
Slow zombie
I obviously agree
I'm going to reinforce my decision though
I'm going with slow zombie
Like you said, because it's the tide
Coming in sort of thing
That you can't do anything about it
Is like the scary part
Is that you see it coming
You see the horde shambling towards you
And you know that there's too many
And that they will never stop coming
And that's something about it
Whereas fast zombies so often just
Feel like really mad people
Right
And that works a lot of times
Like depending on the movie for sure
But it works in a different way
Than your traditional zombie movie
So I think before building the perfect zombie movie
I think zombies are slow
I think fast zombies are a different genre
I agree completely
And the thing I want to add is that
Looking at it from a game design
Perspective, if you're fast
And unlimited and you have to get headshot
That's just bad game design
It's bad game balance, overpowered
That's true, also
If we're going back to the idea that zombies
Take on the characteristics of the bodies
They infect
Well, those are corpses
So I think that's part of the reason
Why they're so slow, right?
They're literally like falling apart
Like they can't move fast
Maybe if someone was freshly bit
Maybe faster, I guess
I was going to say, there's also that third option
Yeah, also
A lot of modern zombie movies
Tend to do fast zombies now
And if we're making an ideal zombie movie
We're going to have to sort of
Think about what audiences
Might find appealing now
Right? So people are
Kind of sick of the fast zombie
Maybe not sick, but they've seen it a lot
So if we can get the slow zombie
Like a resurgence
Bring that back
We've got to shake it up
20 days later
Really shook it up with the fast zombies
You've got to find that next shake-up
If you're going to do it
Either go with the classics
Which are the slow zombies
Do whatever is the next thing that zombies don't do
Like a disinterested zombie
Zombies that are not interested in you
A-loof zombies
A-loof zombies
Like a sad bullfight
And instigate them
They get them to come over and fight you
Right, where you at some point realize
That you're the bad guy
I'll just leave you alone
Sorry
I like a little hustle
There's a series of books called The Morning Star Strain
That you might have heard of
Where the zombies start off and they're kind of pissed off
Like they're full of adrenaline
But then they basically wreck themselves
Like sprinting after the nearest target
So they sort of break their legs
I sort of like that
Yeah, there's a lot of like that
Freshly-bitten rule has been out there for a little bit
Where the more recently dead you are
The more powerful and faster you are
But as you like decompose
You just get slower and slower
Until the ultimate zombie movie would be
Skeletons
In my opinion
I'm saying if it all goes back around
And then skeletons are fast again
Bring back the genre of skeleton movies
Because they have to be stop motion
Yeah
I think the other thing I like about slow movies
Is that it sort of leads to
Unintentionally funny moments
And even in Romero Walking Dead
Where they're trying to set this tone of
It's just scary and really bad
But then it's just kind of silly
This horde of guys that are just
Taking all day to get across the room at you
And I sort of like that
That's one of my things that I like about the zombie genres
It's kind of fun even when it's terrifying
I have a final
Argument to make
Which is that
I've been in a zombie
Sketch series
For correct
And I was allowed to do that
Because they were slow zombies
Had they used fast zombies
I sure as shit wouldn't have been involved
So like it's
For like a big slow guy
Like myself
That's great
Slow zombies are great
You got fast zombies and then there's a couple
Zombies at the back just doing their best
Just like way behind
Huffin' and puffin' zombies, yeah
I gotta walk a little bit and then I'll run for a little
I gotta work out to it
Well
It seems like we're all in agreement
Slow zombies locked in
Now we're gonna zero in on
Sort of the overall theme
Is this about finding your own strength
Or are humans the real monsters
Basically is this an adventure story
For like
The dangers of society or whatever
Like capitalism and stuff
For picking hot button topics for me
Feel strongly about them so far
Oh good
What was the first option
Is it about like finding your own strength
Are we getting like a character arc
Is this guy like learning who he is
In the face of this terrible world size calamity
Or are we learning that
Maybe he's the real monster
Because he's
Anyway
Let's start with Robert this round
Seems like you've got
I am sick to death
Of humans are the real monster trope
Like it was
Okay the first few times we deployed it
But then that becomes every
Not just zombie movie but every
Like worldwide monster threat movie
Is the monsters
Get you in an isolated place
Or in a bad position and then you realize
Humans are the real monsters
And like first of all it's just overused
To death but it also makes for
A much less interesting movie
I mean
A really good story is about character arcs
And so often those movies end
With a character arc being like okay
And now you die because you underestimated
Something or whatever
It's great for hardcore survival run dudes
But
It's terrible for
Story telling
Not always there's no hard and fast rule
But it's bad for storytelling these days
Because every interesting story
That is humans are the real monsters
In my opinion has been done
And then also every uninteresting
Story about that has been done too
It's kind of entry level cleverness
To see a horde of baby eating undead
And be like actually it's our
Self centeredness that makes us the bad guys
Yeah
It's the monsters that are the real monsters
I do want to bring up some good examples
I don't know if you've seen Black Summer
It's on Netflix
It wasn't really received that well
It makes a lot of bold and sometimes
Probably bad artistic choices
Like a lot of pointless nonlinear
Story telling and long long silences
But every time you meet a new person
In that show your skin crawls
And it's like the zombies are fast
Unkillable nightmares but if some stranger
Comes running up and begs to get in the car
You're like oh fuck oh fuck this is bad
And so like
To build tension in a
Troubling way
You've also zeroed in
On the last zombie show that I totally
Checked out of
I don't automatically check them out
But yeah I did check that one out a few weeks ago
And I got halfway through the first episode
And I was like okay yeah I see it
I think
Because I also agree here
I agree that humans are the real
Monsters has been played out
However
If
Like if we can come up
With a new allegory
For a societal problem
To put in here
I'd be into it
Like I enjoyed uh
Romero's land of the dead
And like the class struggle
That was in there
There's been good versions
But I think we have to like really
Really reinvent
That concept
To use it
You know like we need to do a
Like a zombie allegory
That's secretly about how we need to like
Fund NASA
Like something really like random
I don't know how to fit that in
Obviously
The solution is leaving the planet
Gotta fund NASA
Just like if we can
If we do an allegory
It's gotta be fresh
Otherwise I'm throwing it out
This is not about
Humans are the real monster
Maybe it's about allegory
But that will be secondary to the primary
Adventure story
Yes
That sounds great to me
I'm interested
I'm into it yeah
Okay so slow zombies
And no bullshit
Like
Hidden meaning about our problems as a society
Unless we find something really cool
If no ultimate message that humans
Are the real monsters because yes
We all expect that now
Also I think the zombies are the monsters
Yeah
Here's our third prompt
Are these just regular zombies
Or is there some kind of hook
And what I mean is like
Is there like moments where the dead
Are kind of learning
Or holding guns or the unfrozen Nazis
Basically is this a zombie movie
Or some other word then zombie movie
And I don't think setting counts
So if you did zombies on a cruise ship for example
That's a regular zombie movie on a boat
But of course if you did it on a space station
Fuck you those are space zombies
That's a space zombie movie
See you get it
Wait spaceship does count
That boat does
That setting because yes
I think a boat is within the realm of like
A normal thing that zombies would do
Whereas if you're in space and there's zombies
That's a space zombie movie
Right
You don't say oh yeah I'm watching a boat zombie movie
You'd be like what the fuck
You know what it is but you're like that's not a genre
But a space zombie movie that sounds like a genre
Just like if it's a Nazi
Zombie movie
Yeah a great genre I guess
So you want to hook to your story
Is what you're saying Brockway
Yeah you know what I do
I'm gonna say that
Damn it I have to agree
I have to agree
I know I know
This is going quick
I know we need an argument here
I'm sorry
I just agree with you both
I like a straight zombie story
I feel like I grew up
In my age
I had like three Romero movies
And I would sit through like
Boring ass Luchio Fulci movies
Just to have like a normal zombie moment
Like when they fight a shark
Because every zombie was like
Zombies but they're a maniac cop
Or these are zombies but they're unfrozen
Nazis
And I just wanted straight zombie shit
Like there's only like two straight zombie movies
When I was a kid
And I wanted more of that
And now I feel like there's tons of that
And I'm happy
Yeah I'm going from
You know now perspective
From a modern perspective
There's a lot of that
Which is why I think there are room for hooks
I don't actually condemn the basic zombie movie
And still do
Some interesting stuff with that
Largely in place of setting
And stuff but
Yeah I think there's so much more room for a hook
Now that we've established
This baseline of
Everybody has this cultural knowledge now
Everybody knows
All about zombie movies
Not just the rules of them or how they work
But like the variations of them
And plans on them and theoreticals about them
So there's room for you to play with that hook now
Which I think is interesting
Okay but I do have a question
Which is
What zombie movies with hooks
Have been good
That's a very good point
And that's why I'm on the side of regular zombie movie
Um well
This still puts
I still kind of want a hook for that reason
For the reason that I can't
Yeah we're the ones that are going to deal with it
We could be the first good one
Yeah we can be the first good one
Like somebody's going to come out with like 50
I'll tell you the closest thing to
A hook that I enjoyed
Um I don't know if
This counts as a hook because the zombies themselves
Are regular zombies
Uh the movie Maggie
With Arnold Schwarzenegger
Did you guys see that?
Of course not
I don't know if that was
I could call that a good movie
But I really liked the idea
Of a zombie movie that takes place
Like right at the end
Where there's like not that many zombies
There's still sort of around
But society's getting back on its feet
I thought that was a really interesting idea
In a movie that was somewhat boring
And maybe it's boring
Because there weren't that many goddamn zombies in it
But I thought that was a really cool idea
Uh does that count
As a hook?
Of course absolutely
Okay
Oh you think that counts as I was going to argue that for being setting
Like setting to me
I feel it has a
It's because it happened after like a whole thing
Like uh
Like the zombie apocalypse has happened
And so that's a different world completely
So it's not like being on a boat
It's like being on a completely other planet to me
Right
Kingdom would be a hook to you
To these rules
I guess so
Yeah a realm or a kingdom
Is there a movie called Kingdom?
No the actual show called Kingdom
Right as in like getting that name wrong
The Korean show where it's like uh
Medieval times in Korea
Okay I didn't watch that
But you are bringing up this question
And zombies yeah
Yeah does an era count
As a hook?
Because I think caveman zombies would be fun
Yeah
Only because like what are they gonna fucking do
Against those zombies
They'll sell a bunch of boulders in front of a cave
You know?
Like that's a pain in the ass
You lure them over to the dinosaurs
And the dinosaurs bite their heads off
That's true
Yeah we actually wrote an awesome movie
And uh so I guess that's my pitch for a hook
Dinosaurs
Dinosaurs are great
I do think that a few dinosaurs
Should become zombies
I guess maybe all of them would very quickly
So yes that's the hook
This is now a dinosaur movie
The dinosaurs eats the zombie
And you're like sweet the dinosaurs
Is taking care of the zombie for us
And then the dinosaurs like starts retching
And then like looks over at you with zombie eyes
And then it just ends and you're like oh these guys are so fucked
That's the movie
That's the ending of Deep Rising basically
So that's your hook pitch?
Are we pitching hooks?
I think we should pitch some hooks
We're going with hooks I think we shouldn't go
Empty handed out of this meeting
Like here's an idea
An idea
I was originally thinking like animal zombies
Like a horse zombie
That would be fun a bunch of horse zombies
Running around
But one that I genuinely
Think would be really gnarly
Is a
I guess it would be summed up with cyborg zombies
Now let me explain
Which is that
It's the future
And a company has created
Basically what
You're writing Robocop
Hold on
Robot
Robot cops
So a company has created
Like an iPhone for your brain
Basically like google glass
What google glass wanted to be
Like this device that we all put in our brain
And we're all connected to the internet
And it's like our new smart phone
And everybody gets it
And then we find out that when we die
The device is malfunctioned
And continue to
Communicate with our brains
And begin to zombify people
So they're actually
It's not a disease
It's the
I believe night of the living dead rules
In night of the living dead
It was if you die, you're a zombie
Right? Doesn't matter how you died
Yeah, first one
Oh I thought because they come out of the graves
I think the very first one
Was if you die
There's something wrong
That is bringing the dead back to life
Yeah there was no more room in hell
That was like the log line
Right, so that's my pitch
It's not bite driven
It's simply if you're murdered
The device just starts
Puppeting your body around
Okay, it's a great hook
I'll be thinking about that
Okay because I am
But it's a strong maybe
I am realizing that
There's nothing
That's a cool idea
But there's nothing inherently visually awesome
About what I'm pitching
Unless they get like laser eyes or something
I'd still rather see
A dinosaur eat a zombie at this point
I hate to put down my own idea
Those are really different movies
Yeah I think
There's no reason you can't make both
Yeah sure, we can make both
Well I already
Wrote a thousand page
Book with my hook
Of zombies
So I guess I already went
But I'll go twice
I like to do
I've been getting weird in meta for a long time
I'd like to do
Like a Saturday morning block of cartoons
That gets invaded
By zombies
Like you're watching a Saturday morning block of cartoons
And then
It's sort of slowly revealed that they're all kind of in the same world
And this world is
Just starting to face a zombie apocalypse
Over the course of how many years
Like how many years does this just go on
As a normal cartoon program block
I would say you kind of
Would watch at least the first
Good chunk of it live as they
Realize that this is happening
But then yeah you could do
It would be cool for a third act certainly to do like a time jump
Like this is
I guess this is more a TV show
I guess 2021 you put these cartoons on TV
Introduce the zombies in 2025
Uh
No you're introducing the zombies
Pretty well at least the hints of them
Right from the start because you really want that zombie action
I don't want you to just
I feel like that's got to be an episode one deal right
Yeah you got to start to get there
But you can slow roll it
I want them to be like
Have the plush toys
So you would have to have the ingenious plan
To keep this show
On the air
Slow long con
And then just
Have them all murdered
Yeah that's great
I like a
Scooby-Doo moment where they try to find out
Who the ghoul really is
And they pull off his face and it's just
Flesh and bone under words
Because it's a zombie
Because they're too close
Way too close
There's my killer scene
To recap
We've got
A hook for our movie
And it's either
Saturday morning cartoon block
Gets invaded by zombies, dinosaurs
Or iPhone zombies
iPhone brain zombies
I want to get rid of my
Pitch
Because the way you described it just now
iPhone zombies means
That we might end up making an accident to allegory
For like all the kids on their phones
There's no way we're getting out of that movie
I don't want to tell that shit
It's our phones that are the real
It's still the zombies
People are getting that from the commercial
We can't escape that
I'm dropping that immediately
That's a great point
For my part
I'd just like to make this one small argument
Obviously there will be dinosaurs
In my cartoon block
So in a way we just do Brockways
And everybody's happy
Well, here's the thing
So
I do really like the cartoon idea
However
I think dinosaurs are more fun
As CGI
Because that's more
Gory, that's more visceral
I'd rather see that
One of the very few things
Yeah
There are better as CGI
That said
The Saturday morning cartoon idea
Is fantastic
And it can, yes, have dinosaurs
But that is the one thing
The other idea is bringing to the table
So I guess we have to ask ourselves
Do we want that
Or do we want
Or are we happy going with
The cartoon version
I think Brockways idea
Gives me way more joy than my own idea
But again, it's apples and oranges
Sweet
Let's go with the cartoon
Yeah, let's go with the cartoon
I don't care what David says
You know what, if we can get it
If we can get away with it
They're gonna be Dino Riders
Oh, now we're talking
Will the zombies be riding the dinosaurs?
Oh, shit
At some point, yeah, that's gotta be the turn
I took it as writers with a T
In the writers room we will have dinosaur writers
Oh, I meant like the show
Dino Riders
I like them both
I'm down for both
But we gotta keep moving
The next prompt
We sort of touched on this a little already
Did the people in this movie know
What zombies were going into this or not
Now, it should be an easy one
But they both sort of suck
I personally, I sort of hate when characters
In the movie are all cute and they like
Know they're in a movie, but I really hate
The lazy world building of saying to me
Oh, this world's just like yours
You have a very specific percent of your pop culture
Except for when we accidentally reference it
Like walking dead
They don't know what zombies are
But like somebody mentioned Resident Evil
And the pilot and I'm like, how the fuck
Do you have that and not know what those things are
It's a romcom here
It's a dating sim
I think it's a fun bit
If they know about zombies
And the zombies turn out to function
Nothing like they were told
You can shoot them in the chest and they die
And it's like, what the fuck
I thought only the brain
That said, for the Saturday morning cartoon premise
Like you're picturing like kids shows
Right? And like kind of cheery
Yeah, they should probably not know about it
Yeah, I think it's funnier
You would have to explain the concept
Of mortality to them
Right, I want to see
You wouldn't be allowed to see actual violence
But you'd have to start using it
Yeah, I want to see the shock
I want to see a fucking planetier
That just caved someone's head in
Yeah, and like the first
One of the first GI Joes
Like they're sitting there shooting lasers
And he gets torn apart and just
Eating in front of all the rest
And they have to deal with what real violence looks like
In their world now
I can't even picture that
That's incredible
You know who do really well against
Zombies?
Shredder
Now think about it
Would just be really happy
To be in their element all of a sudden
This is why I've been doing this
I told you it would pay off one day
Yeah
See an asshole now
You know who would be totally fucked
From the same show? Krang
Yeah
Krang is a delicacy to them
Yeah, Krang is just one giant talking brain
And also he has a
Totally open brain window in his stomach
Yeah, that thing is a weirdly designed robot
Yeah, that's basically just to
Serve zombies quickly and easily
Yeah, he's at zombie level
Star waiter
So
Are we in agreement though?
I think that
See it's tough
This is one where I sort of want to thread the needle
But we have to make a binary choice
Do these people come from a world where
Zombie fiction exists
I say a hard no
I think it's way better
If they have to discover what zombies are
I like that
Yeah, I think from the top level it can be okay
To acknowledge that zombies are a thing
Just like a lot of vampire movies
Vampire movies don't need to be shy
About that shit, they don't
They don't ever be like, what the fuck is a vampire
No, it's fine
You don't need to cover for yourself
Zombie movies
Here is the argument for why it's actually
Silly that they wouldn't know
About zombies
That zombies is
Even if the movies didn't exist
It's a very basic cultural thing
Like the dead coming alive
That's a basic fear
Like maybe they don't have the word zombie
For it, but they would have a word
For it
That said, I still think
We should go with no zombie movies
They don't know the rules
They don't know like the biting thing
They have to discover that
Cause it's way more fun if they have to discover it
I agree
I also agree
What a pleasant journey this has been
I know
We're becoming good friends, everyone
So fifth question
Is our protagonist
Ready for this badass
Or a struggling everyman
I
Am gonna vote with an
Everyman
Because of the nature of the show
Or movie we're making
The Saturday morning cartoon idea
I do like
The Dino Riders and the G.I.J.Os
But I don't think it should start with that
I think it should start
With more of like
I don't know
Like a Scooby-Doo type
Or like
Some other cartoon
That is way less prepared
Okay
So you don't think Scooby-Doo is prepared
For zombies, that's all they do all day
As fight zombies
They are pretty sure old men
Right, I guess I disagree
Because if I'm allowed to pick between John Rambo
And a second thing, I always pick John Rambo
So I
Want a survivalist or a super cop
I don't want to Jesse Eisenberg
Maybe he can show up and slip on a banana peel
But I want our main guy to be like
Just like
He knows how to open doors
And kill zombies and find food
And hunt, you know, that type of thing
I definitely don't want a Jesse Eisenberg
For the specific premise
I think it would be both
I mean it would naturally be both
You'd have the cartoons that are utterly unprepared
For any degree of this
But you would also have the sort of
Double play
Which is the super bad asses that don't
Get to ever see the real consequences
That, you know, it's a consequence of this game
Suddenly discover they're
Actually the everyman in this world
Yeah, I guess
What it is, I would want
A bad ass that's in proximity
To a lot of everyman
Cartoons
Who can get smoked
I want a lot of bad asses too
That realize that maybe they're not so bad ass
In front of this
Right, that's true, yeah
Everyman get to step up
To grab some of the G.I. Joe weapons
Right, that Care Bears would wreck zombies
Just blast them with
Tummy magic
Tummy magic and now guns
Yeah, I really like the idea of a Care Bear
Just picking up a G.I. Joe weapon
I think a lot of the
Fucking nut up hard wire
Yeah, I think what we'd want to front load it with
Is a lot of
Of the other kind
Like I want to see Garfield and friends get torn apart
You know? Yeah
And like I do
I want to see the less prepared
The more innocent ones
Just get steamrolled
And then I like the idea of
Like you take someone from that world
Like a Care Bear
And you reveal that they have a dark past
Right, that they are actually
You don't think they're prepared
And then they turn out to be the most prepared
Right
Trauma Bears got some shit to work through
The idea of adding another level to
Like those over complicated stories already
Like they would take Frogger
And they'd say what if Frogger was a bebop
Journalist from the 50s
And then he got time travel to the old west
Which is how they made cartoons in the 80s
Yeah, they would just keep throwing shit on
And I really like the idea of
Also having to add zombies to
A fourth or fifth idea
Absolutely, yeah
So who's our protagonist?
I feel like
I'm okay with the struggling Everyman
If he gets to a
Tough place quickly
I just think we could have
Secret Badass, like it's the best of both worlds
Where it is actually a badass
Right
But we present them like in Everyman
In like the first act, you know
Like in the first like 10 pages
Of this thing
And then they spring into action
And like the other
The other ones are like how did you learn this
Kind of thing
Now that you put it in my head
I would love for it to be John from Garfield
Ooh, wow
That's really strong, yeah
Just this pathetic weenie
But you know nothing about him
Because you just see everything about him
From the perspective of his cat
Who doesn't know all the shit he did in Vietnam
Right, I also like the idea of
John secretly going to gun ranges
Like maybe he was going to take
A really dark turn in his life
And then the zombies happened
And gave him a purpose
And he's got a
Got an on weenie, all the weeniness he learned
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm
I also think that he'd probably want to hunt
Specifically Garfield, I think when Garfield gets
Bit by a zombie, something terrible happens
And it becomes like some sort of a smart brain zombie
Okay
And I know I didn't really want this in our
Program, but I feel like it's evolving into that
That
There will be some sort of a king zombie
Who is it and John is hunting him
Just the emotional core
Like maybe Garfield made him promise to kill him
If he ever turns
But he didn't get to, Garfield took off
And so now he's just looking to fulfill
His promise to kill his own cat
And it's all he has left
Civilizations collapsed, all he has left is this promise
He made to this fat cat
Right, I could see the idea that Garfield
Like is taken away by the zombies at first
Like Bit kind of taken away
And the reveal in the third act
Is now like the ruler
Like of the zombies
I do like that twist
Something that troopers it
He's the brain
Right, he can be like big and grotesque
If you want
Like all fucked up
I don't know
Part of me is like there's a lot of Garfield
Memes out there
And I feel like
We're going down a path
We're not healing
But we're not
What about Sonic the Hedgehog
But like a little erotic
If anyone has done that
The problem with that is
Fast zombie, you don't want a fast zombie
No, he's pregnant
So he can't get around real well
So he's like sloshing around
Yeah, pregnant zombie
You have a good point
I think all these would be
We wouldn't specifically do Garfield
It doesn't have to be a cat
It can change the characters
But it would be running alongside
Every other show, of course
An ensemble thing with
Maybe him emerging as your main character
Yeah, what you could do
We don't want to spend too much time
In act one establishing these cartoons
We want to be able to point to something
And have the viewer know this is their Garfield one
What we could do
What we could maybe play with is
Remember that anti-drug PSA
Characters
Garfields there
Alphas there, he keeps trying to eat Garfield
It could be like that
It could be like an anti-drug
Or that's a way to merge
These worlds
This is a fictional universe
Of those cartoons altogether
For a special
For a very special episode
And then zombies show up
That's great
That's perfect
Characters in there too
Henry Winkler maybe
Gary Busey
Just throwing out some ideas
Yes to all
Mr. Belvedere
I feel like
Whoever are
Protagonists is they become a badass
Very quickly
We're not going to be falling around someone who's like
Squeamishly, oh I don't want to kill the zombies
They're going to get there
I honestly think they're already there
When it starts
My argument was that
People didn't know
Like they were just secretly
Ready for this
Right
They just the rules of their universe didn't allow it
Or the
Take a Care Bear for example
That is a bear
Right and like
A bear can fuck you up so maybe it's just
A Care Bear
Just because I care doesn't mean I'm not a bear
Exactly
It can be like a gentle giant
That turns out to just
Have a really dark past
Like a film like
What was that nobody
With Bob Odenkirk
Where it's like a retired badass
Or something that nobody knows about
So now what is
The tone
Crushing terror of a world against you
Or zany video game with unlimited
Dumb easy targets
I feel like we're going towards zany video game
But I guess
Let's discuss that
I sort of like them both
I think the zombie land movies are a little dumb
But it's also no question how I would spend the apocalypse
So I guess like
My dream movie would be following the video game
Lunatics around while they're fucking around doing
Awesome zombie kills while everyone else is
You know rebuilding civilization
Or whatever I want to I want to show them
Just so it's more fun
When you see the people like making an army
A darkness car and just enjoying
The murder right somebody else is like
Trying to get ice cream stand
Back on the ground like don't you guys miss ice cream
I honestly
I want to get I think it's funny
To do dark and grounded with the cartoon
Characters yeah like I think it's
It's funnier to see
Like you know a cartoon
Character mercy kill
Another cartoon character who's been bit
And like crying
You know them like starving
In a bunker they're starting wacky and zany already
Yeah
I think this is like a dose of reality for
Them
So I think I personally think the
Darker the better the more tragic
The better however there still
Have to be elements of somebody building
Their army of darkness car
Yeah we yeah I think we can have
Both
I think we can like my
My issue with like zombie
Zombie land is that
It like
It's sort of just
Pushed too far for that
Like it's so like you take that movie
Compared to like Sean the dead
And Sean the dead actually has emotional
Scenes in it
And like feels like they're real people
Even though they're obviously comedic characters
And I just I
My eyes glaze over whenever I watch zombie land
Because it's just so
Incredibly
Gimicky I guess
Yeah it's a cake made out of frosting like someone said
Hey my favorite part of zombie movies is when they're
Fucking around having a good time killing zombies
And then they said what if the whole movie was that
And there's a reason
Why you're not supposed to do that
Right
So I like I like the frog
On a hot plate idea like army of darkness
Is a great example because like
If you watch that from evil dead
And slowly watch that series
You're never gonna assume
That by the end he has a
Helicopter car thing
Chopping up armies of the dead
Like they slowly bring you into that
Where you're like wait how the hell did we get here
Sort of slowly
I mean they made three movies
The first movie was absolutely like
Cabin in the woods movie the second movie
Was basically the first movie again
And then the third movie was like
Yeah but funny and then the third movie was like
Okay helicopter fucking car
Versus medieval army of the dead
Yeah
And it's a perfect movie
And yes
They're all perfect movies yes
But I do think we can
In the span of two hours
Get us to that place where shit is
Just completely out of control
Right
If we play our cards right
So we're in agreement
The zombies are a real threat
The overall theme is
The overall tone is horror
But we're still having moments of fun
I think so yeah
Okay now
This might seem like a simple one
But do victims need to get bitten
Or like we said earlier
There's just no more room in hell
Now I think it works both ways
Because I expect you to die if a zombie bites you
In a movie
Even if it's not a contagious bioweapon zombie
So this is more of a tone thing
Because in this mission there's a hope to it
Like if you can kill all the zombies
You're done
But if the dead keep coming back
That's like crushing existential terror
Because life is just fucking over
As you know it
So how do you feel about that
Say G.I. Joe breaks his leg
Dies from trauma
Is he a zombie
Or is he fine because he didn't get bitten
I want to see
I want to see the scenes where the cartoon characters
Have to deal
With somebody deal with their own mortality
As they have these zombie bites
And turn and beg for death
Of course and our
Garfield subplot depends on it
We can't lose the Garfield subplot
That's the emotional core of this movie
Yeah I think
I agree any other movie
I like the no more room in hell
I like that better fundamentally
But in this case
I think dealing with zombie bites
Is going to be very important
That's exactly what I was going to say
But I like the no more room in hell
Or the just
Some external force outside of the bite
Makes it
I did that in my own book because I want to see more of that
Seems like we've gotten away from that
And very into it as
As kind of a viral thing
Yeah
Like I do
Our movies need to have that
For sure
I don't think this movie can though
Yeah this one works
I agree
Just because there's the no more room in hell
To me is more depressing
And that's what we need to push against
Like our cute little colorful Saturday morning guys
The first one to kill himself
And then you
You see slowly like the people
His friends mourn him and realize that he just comes back
That's a good moment
So
This is another big important thing
Do we slowly suggest the origin and rules
Or do we somehow explain everything
Do we sneak it into the exposition
In most cases
I prefer to be a mystery
I don't really like a comet or a wizard
If they're fast rage zombies I don't mind a chemical spill
Or a bio weapon but
As for the rules
I go a little crazy if they don't get explained
But I don't want
Like the source of the zombies explained
Like that makes sense
Right
I think the only way to
Actually explain the source of the zombies
Is to do something clever with the Saturday morning cartoon characters
You know
Like if one of them used like care bear magic
To accidentally make zombies
That said
It's just a fucked up fantasia
Yeah it's just like a fantasia spell
That went wrong
I think that's a fun way to do it
Either to throw away the origin
Like a quick explanation
Or like some dark reveal
But generally speaking
If we can't think of
What that is
I would rather leave it ambiguous
Could just be a new like gritty show
Added to their block
It just doesn't
It doesn't mix well with the others
I do like that
I was about to say unless we can come up with a vital reason for it to be there
But that's like a really good reason
I like that
Like the programmer for the network said
Like hey I got this great new show
And they're like I don't think it's gonna work
He's like fuck you and he puts it in and then everything goes wrong
Right it was supposed to play it like
Saturday at 9pm
And they put it in at 9am
Well when I was a kid
They used to play pro wrestling
Right after the cartoons
And so maybe
They made too dark a wrestler
They made some sort of advanced
Maybe they just went for too dark of a show
They put WWE in Raw
Yeah
Cause that was pretty messed up
I mean when they put wrestling on right after
I guess we didn't really know it at the time
But so many of those
Like everybody just dies to tragedy
So you're just guaranteed
Watching soap opera deaths
In slow motion
Yeah you gotta teach kids about life
And you know who should do it
The ultimate wars
Hexah Jim Deagon
Everybody on my favorite show
After cartoons started dying
To murders
I don't think wrestling is the right choice
I guess that's the example of how
That didn't quite mix with the tone of like
Laugh Olympics you know
If you remember that one
Yeah yeah no it doesn't have to be wrestling
Just I get what you're saying
Right I do
I do want to establish the rules
As clearly as possible and keep them consistent
I think this is maybe
I mentioned this on the podcast before
That zombies are really inconsistent
And frustrating for me
Like walking dead is really bad about that
They're hugely inconsistent
In terms of their skull density especially
Like normally in that show if you have a color crown
At brain height you're untouchable
Like you're just wiping zombies out
Taking skulls home with your color crown
And then sometimes a zombie will be on a crafty stealth mission
And you'll have to get him stabbed off you
By seven other people
And I think it's bad because
Obviously but it's also made
By the most hardcore zombie nerds
Keeping track of all this shit and you're never gonna have
A more vanilla zombie story with more effort, thought
And money put into it than walking dead
And it's still just all over the fucking place
So if we could do our part
To establish the rules and keep them established
I'd feel good
We're dealing with a meta universe right
And so
In the rules of that meta universe
How
Well written is
If we're going with the zombie show
That's in the wrong time slot
How well written was that
Zombie show
There's a version where the characters are frustrated
Exactly because of
What you're saying
That the zombies are inconsistent
And maybe there's some consistency to it
Yeah that is a consistency
It's a rule which is that
There doesn't appear to be a rule
Or maybe part of it is that they're trying
To figure out those rules
The idea that they're just
Criticizing the walking dead
As they realize the nature of their apocalypse
It's fucking not even written well
We just established this
I like that
I guess with super friends they were
Always inconsistent but
The governing rule of that was because
They farmed it out to really disinterested
And underpaid Korean animators
And so
Generally when something terrible and stupid happened
You're like oh that they didn't know
How to fly or something like that
Right
That could be your
Necessary twist on the zombies towards the end
Animation glitches
Just due to like outsourcing
Right if we want to go extremely meta
The characters could slowly realize
That they need plot armor
So they start like
Fighting over who's the most interesting
One of them
And like the most compelling story lines
That they're creating
We're writing the Game of Thrones finale now
See how bad this got
Yeah this is getting terrible
So
How did you guys land on this one
Do we slowly suggest the rules
Or is there a character that comes in and is like
I figured it out everyone
I counted how long blah blah blah
Personally I'm not a fan of the meta stuff
Just because there's so much of it
Even with zombie
So I'd rather
I think we play it
Straight
And have rules
Okay I agree
Yeah
Okay so
One of these characters is gonna
We'll have a little professor turtle
And he'll be like gentlemen
He'll have a zombie like strapped to the chair
Beside of me like I've studied the zombies blah blah
He'll explain to everyone how it works
Not exactly that but you'd be on board with something
Better than that
I think we need to lock down professor turtle
I think that's
He's locked in okay
Professor turtles
I guess we've already answered this
Because we're building something
This is actually not even close to the format of how I thought this was gonna work
But I love this show
The prompt was
Is the shit currently hitting the fan
Or are we navigating the ashes of civilization
So in our current pitch
The shit is hitting the fan
Yes
In general though let's just discuss this like in general
Do you like zombie movies
That do one of these things more than the other
I think the ones I like the most
Are the shit hitting the fans
ones
For the most part I mean
Honestly it kind of will just depend
On the movie
In the case of this
Like I could see us
Skipping ahead in time if we need to
You know I think it would be
Really surprising
For the audience if at some point
We just cut to five years later
And everybody's hardened and grizzled
You know what else I like about that
If I want to add on to that is
What an amazing art design project
It would be to take all these other cartoons
And mix them together five years later
To have like Smurf's architecture
With G.I. Joe architecture
Yeah
That would be fantastic
Yes like I
Again it's no surprise I did it
Already myself so
But I'm a fan of the time jumps
I definitely like to do
A huge chunk of it
As shit hits the fan and then
Right
Maybe midpoint act two probably act three
Jump forward in time to like
I think what I like about
The later stories is that
It sort of determines like the scarcity of things
Like the number of bullets and the food drama
And especially I like the mad maxiness
Of survivor groups like
If you get far enough away from the shit hitting the fan
Like people can like fully go crazy
And find a community of like minded crazy people
And really build something weird
I like that
Hey do you guys
Have you read crossed the Garthenis comic
No
It was like a really indulgent Garthenis comic
And that it was sort of him seeing how horrible
He could be so the zombies were
Like kind of lucid and functional sadists
Who giggled through murder orgies
And it was I'm not going to say it's good
But it's better than making it sound
And then Alan Moore wrote one called
Crossed plus 100
That was set that far into the future
And it was also
It was indulging in an Alan Moore way
And that it was like as boring as he could fucking make it
But it was also written entirely in
Hundred years from now dialect
So I can't tell if it was good because it's
Like in a foreign language
But it's definitely less
Tell them if this is good because I don't
Understand
So
I guess the case I'm making there
Is it's more thrilling to have the shit hitting
The fan but it's
Maybe more evocative to have it
Like far later because now you have to imagine
What life is like in this whole other
Time jump it's going to be a time jump
I think what we do
Alright so first act
Is the build up
Or the inciting incident hits the fan
Right the first act
Is we have our core group
That find each other
They're all navigating this
Sudden apocalypse
They decide to try to stop
The zombies maybe they have some
Sort of
Maybe they think they know the origin
Or some way to stop it
Right and so the first half
Of act two is
Is that struggle maybe a couple
Of them die
They start you know we start
Establishing their relationships
And then we hit the halfway point
And we make that
Since it's like the point of no return
We make that the realization that
They can't stop this
And then we do hard cut
To five years later
And we
Have them like in their
New you know situation
And
They're you know now we've seen these
Relationships maybe Sonic's there
And Sonic is you know pregnant now
Very pregnant yeah
Extremely pregnant and so all these
New complications and stuff
And then we almost it's almost like
Resetting the movie you have another inciting incident
Where
Someone is like guys I figured it out
Maybe one character has never
Stopped thinking about
Solving the problem
Right somebody's got a show back up
Like somebody has disappeared from this society
With the information
I figure out what's actually going on
Right and so there's a new push to
Like
Stop what's happening
I have two gag ideas I want to pitch here
One I want to pull out
Just once just one time only
To like a single child watching it
After the time jump so this show's been
On for five years and he's just like
Grimly watching these terrible
Terrible things happen on Saturday morning cartoons
Now my other pitch
Is not that but
It's all this is taking place on a VHS tape
Someone taped
And so it's not actually going out on the air
It's all taking place on the VHS tape
And so this is
They made a mix of all their favorite cartoons
That they just recorded
Right and so like it's not
The world doesn't know about this it's just like one person
Discovering this after they get like
Some old box of shit out of their attic
Is the time jump
Then
The fact that they're missing episodes
In the tape
I like that yeah like they didn't tape
A show for you know
Five six episodes and that in cartoon time
This is what they left to deal with
Just an idea like
It's sort of a whole other like
Time travel element to it
Could be somebody recorded over
Part of it with a zombie movie
That could be the origin story too
I don't know if it's better
It's maybe less clever
But like it makes more sense
I don't know how to explain it
Alright if it's like a
Thank you
If it's like a last action hero situation
Where it's like a magic tape
Or like something like lightning hit the house
No it needs to be a last action hero
Centaurio
That's it
More movies need to be last action hero
I'm just out right
I worry we're gonna suck that kid into the tape
And I don't want to go there
I feel like we're right there
We're about to suck that kid into the tape
I just mean like
Yeah no sucking kids
I just mean like some sort of magic happens
That affects the tape
Right yeah it's the golden ticket
You use the wrong tape to do this
Yeah
Yeah he gets the tape
At like a mysterious fair
By a man that's a video clerk
That's clearly a wizard
Played by Christopher Walken
I like it
Don't play this tape
I can't do it Christopher Walken
You just did
This next one is good
Because if we do this is a plot question
It's the main sequence of our movie
Are we doing a siege thing
Or a second thing
So I think zombies greatest strengths
Are throwing themselves against your defenses
Or being between you and a thing
So we need to pick one
I vote siege because I think a zombie's strength
Is numbers and your strength
Is foresight and a siege is the perfect battle
Around between those two things
A siege as in the zombies all kind of flooding
Yes
Flooding your main fortress
Thing in the movie that we built to is
Oh god we're trapped here and here comes the zombies
We have 8 hours to prepare 2 weeks to prepare
I don't care but some prep time
Like I say
Our main darkness is the perfect movie
Maybe that's why I'm pitching siege
I think it would be
Like
First act they
Get away from the apocalypse
They're able to get away from them
Maybe the zombies all congregate
Around one main area
And then I think
What it would culminate to
Is whatever efforts they make
To stop the apocalypse
Will draw the zombies to them
Or like they have to infiltrate
The zombie area themselves
But whatever the case
That would be them dealing
With a siege of some sort
What if they're
All their animation block is getting cut
Except for one show
And so there's just this tiny little section
Of land left or real estate
Or however you want to look at it
And so all the zombies are coming
And then they just have this tiny little area left to protect
And it's all or nothing this is their Alamo
The 930am slot
Everything else is Christian programming
I think we're
Kind of by our nature doing a second thing
With the time jump
There's certainly going to be sieges
In there with whatever
Whatever life
Or society they build after the time jump
Will be based around
Like a permanent siege of course
It would have to be
I think with the time jump
Kind of getting out of the way
That's what this is doing
I think it would be the second thing
On a mission to do whatever
It was to stop this
I think it's
Really going to bring up starship troopers
For the second time but yeah I think it's the end of starship troopers
Where they have to
Go in
Get the brain
It starts with a siege that kind of calms down
The time jump happens
And they've been living
Sort of behind this barrier
And they have to cross it
And go into the zombies
To stop it
So they have to like sneak into
It'd be like
That new
The Zack Snyder zombie movie
Where they go into Vegas
Right
But yeah but good
Better than that would be
I prefer it to be better
Did you see the prequel to that?
No never
Stunning it's about safe cracking
And so the dude is always sticking his ear up
To the safes and turning them
And then it'll cut inside the safe
And show like five minutes of
Like clockwork CGI
Well he like carefully turns a knob
Like someone said
How are we going to make this exciting?
It's a dude listening to his safe
And they're like I've got it
CGI clockwork and they never came up with a second idea
He does that inside of a bouncing truck
Like
Like you're listening for a click right
That's the fucking idea
He is just getting bashed around this
Noisy truck and I'm like okay so he can't do it
Right but no he's just that good
Right
Definitely what I need in a zombie movie
Which is long safe cracking sequence
Yes well there are no zombies in this one
Yes there's a news cast
About zombies so like
It's taking place in the entry
Entry level of the zombie apocalypse
So it's happening but it hasn't like taken over the world yet
Why?
Do they fight zombies at all dude
In the movie
There's like a zombie dream sequence
That's it
Why do you suppose someone would make a movie like that
It had to have been a bit right
Because they let them
My theory was that that actor
When they were shooting the zombie one
Was like you know what's weird
I'm doing a totally different movie
That I'm kind of like this character
I don't know if you want to loop it into this or something
Because it just that sounds like
The most boring prequel
You could possibly do
You know what I bet it was
I bet that dude's just awesome
I bet he like drank with everybody all day
And he became their best friends
Like dude we gotta do a fucking movie together
Yeah I think that's what happened
Yeah he seems pretty likeable
Yeah I think that's what he was
You lovable bastard
This character you're doing is so funny
What if this was the movie
You mean the safe crackings
This sounds very silly for
So whole movie
Like listen to this guy talk
We're doing it
That is a good point
I've watched most of the latest season of
Great British Bake Off just for Jurgen
Yes he's fantastic
What's now going to bake of that tiny cupcake
Listen that shit all day
Then there's a dude named
The Italian's name is Giuseppe
It's almost racist
They both
They radiated
Divorced energy
Like they just felt
Divorced I don't even think they were
And I was rooting for them the whole time
Yeah
So we have one last prompt
Are we wrapping this up in two hours
Or is this an ongoing saga
Two hours six hours whatever
Is there a beginning middle and end to our story
Or are we setting up a maxi series
I always
Prefer
Stuff to end
Like
Even if it's after five seasons
I want to know how
It'll end ahead of time
And aim for that
And then take as long
As we need to tell the story
I think tops this is like maybe
Two seasons
Of fairly short
I do think maybe it's not
A movie maybe it's a
TV series but I think that's a short run
TV series
I think you could probably do it in one
Yeah a mini series
I think you could do like six to ten episodes
I feel like an idea
Is a great gimmick
That if we had to get it done in one movie
Like that's fine
But I think we're going to have so many ideas
And so many characters that we need a lot more space to breathe
I think we do
There's a lot of space to play in that world
We need a series for this
If we're going to be at home
We are going to need a series order
Right we'll get Mike Flanagan to direct
You know a lot of monologues
About like the after life
Yeah he will
And I will love it for him
No absolutely not
I want him to bring anything he wants to bring into this
It's going to be about Catholicism
Yeah
I totally agree with you guys
I want to wrap this up
But I do sort of like
When something just overstays its welcome
Like Walking Dead
Just ran their shit in the ground
They completely ran out of ideas
But it kind of let everyone
Make up their own mind when it was time for them to leave
And I think that's a luxury
Most movies don't give you
Like a lot of zombie stuff
I really wish there was more of that
You do not wish there was more Walking Dead
I don't
Nobody does
I still watch it and still like it
I understand that
But I think if it went off the air everybody would be like
Oh okay
That was planning you're right
I think there's a charm to both
Because I do think that
Our cartoon premise would be fun
To run into the ground
Or at least overstare our welcome
And do like a lost thing
Like if we mystery boxed this
And then like gave everybody a wedgie in the last season
I think that would be really funny
Let's insert this real quick
What if we beast ward it
So like you know when a cartoon show
Has been on the air for a few years
They come back in and like cyber update it
For today's kids
I feel like that
That would be your last season
It's the reboot of this cartoon
It doesn't understand anything that's good
About the source material
Where it's like bad CGI
In the air
Yeah perfect
Yeah
I think there's a room for this
To be like there's a world where this is a movie
But I do really like the idea
Of like
Just like stretching out
A series as far as
It can go
Until everybody is just so exhausted
With it
Because I really like
The idea of people taking this premise
For granted you know
And getting like sick of it
A very limited silly thing
For people like oh god
They're doing another season of that
So that would be delightful
Definitely better for the goof
But I like the limited series thing
And this is coming from somebody
And I can't believe I'm going to say it
Who has watched every episode of Supernatural
I do think
Yeah I do think
The stuff can go on too long
Yeah I mean this feels like a serial
Right it feels like
We stand alone episodes as much as like
We're continuing a story
Couple seasons
So it's going to be hard
To like spin our wheels
I just think there's value to both
One is more like playing a practical
Joke on everybody and the other is like
Trying to make something of quality
Oh I absolutely think we should do the reboot
It's the last season though
I feel like it's not so much a practical joke
As like a bit
Like a big bit
Yeah we could also
Perfectly plan out
Every season and just plan
A complete arc
That lasts 25 seasons
Yeah
Like where we keep saying like no we do know how it's going to end
And then when the last season finally
Happens 25 years later
Everybody's like wow they actually did
I think that
Yeah that would be a huge surprise
All it takes is for you to do well many years
Of hard work and to be a genius
Everybody to believe in you
We can do that
You know I mentioned Game of Thrones ending earlier
But like we might be making a case for
How they should have run that show into the ground
Cause when they tried to wrap it up
Oh yeah that show didn't need less time
That show needed like three more seasons
I think people would still like that show
If they just sort of let everyone give up on it
People would just sort of have the fond memories
Of the first five or six seasons they enjoyed
Just like I think
Walking Dead's a good show for the most part
Yeah I really enjoyed it
Yeah but then there was like a season
Where Negan would come out and he would give
Like alpha dog
Speeches for what seemed like
Eight hours and
And that went on for more than an entire season
And
That was awful
And
They're doing a thing where they're kind of
Rebuilding like the
Class system so they like found a town where they're like
Oh you were a rich person
Before then we're gonna make you a rich person here
And you're like fucking why
I do like the soap opera model
The model of like this infinity train
Where it's like just hop off
And hop on whenever you feel like it
We'll be here
You guys hopped off so much later
You guys rode that train into the next state
I got off on the next stop
I liked Walking Dead 2
But I think it was season 2
Maybe season 3 then I was just like nope
Oh yeah I lasted
Very long
So I have no idea what the fuck you're talking about
I think what's appealing also
Create the cast system
Just can't even imagine how it got there
What's appealing also with
Stuff like the Walking Dead is getting to see these characters
Like progress
So like you can have these cartoon characters
Get like the
You know the coral treatment
Where they're like more and more grizzled
And
You know they start falling apart
Or murdering and
Over like the span of 10 seasons
So I think that would also be kind of fun
I agree
Just how far Cuddle Bear has gone
On this journey
Yeah exactly
And I don't know if you guys read X-Men of the 90s
But like comparable characters would go through these arcs
Where they would rebuild their bodies
And get like extra brains mashed into them
And then like we could do that
Because they're cartoons
Bored with two characters boom
They just merged into one unit mind
And now they're, you know, that's the kind of thing you can do
Now they're a Centaur, who fucking cares
I'm pregnant
Pregnant Centaur
Everybody's, there's gonna be a season
Where everybody gets pregnant
Everybody gets pregnant
God this is hot already
Oh yeah
It's gonna be erotic, right?
I think that went without saying
I think certain seasons will be more erotic
Than others, for sure
Like I think the reboot
As is usually the tradition with reboots
There's gonna be a lot of fucking in that reboot
I mean it's gonna be
I know what you did last summer
It's just straight fucking all the time
If Crank sees a pregnant Centaur
He's gonna fuck it
Yeah if we get on HBO
We can be really explicit too
Yeah
So we'll send this to HBO
I think we wrote a pretty good thing
This is not at all what I thought we were gonna do
I really thought we were going to
Just sort of decide on what
The best theoretical zombie film would be
Using Tropes
But I think what we accidentally did is write
Like two seasons of the greatest
Show ever
Yeah now let's just submit this around
Get paid for it
Sweet, you know if we did this podcast
Every week by the end of the year
We would have seven awesome shows
Yeah we would have
A lot of shows and no listeners
Tune in next week when we like
Pitch a romantic comedy
About sorcerers
The Cosmoverse is in trouble once again
Evil Count's Spatula
And his Star Boys
And their Star Boys
And their Wukong
The Cosmoverse
The Cosmoverse is in trouble once again
Evil Count's Spacula
Spacula and his Star Boys have captured Princess Aether, and it's up to the Supremes to save
her now.
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