The Dogg Zzone by 1900HOTDOG - Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 65, Expository Movie Theme Songs 3: The Beginning ... with Zak Koonce!

Episode Date: March 16, 2022

It's time for the third installment of our podcast series on movie theme songs that are about the movies they're in! It's time for Seanbaby! It's time for Brockway! Holy hell it's time for Zak Koonce! It is time for DOKKEN.

100 Hot Dog 100 Hot Dog Out of podcast slams with maximum hype Say Hot Dog Podcast Word Yeah When you taste that nitrate power You're in the dog zone for an hour Come on

Do nothing numbered 100 100 Hot Dog 100 Hot Dog 100 Hot Dog 100 Hot Dog 100 Hot Dog 100 Hot Dog

Yeah 9000 You're in the dog zone 9000 The posting dimension of fun I'm the internet Sean baby co-founder of the final comedy website 100 Hot Dog and I'm here with the vice co-founder

Robert plenty of follow-up questions Brockway I'm the man with Brockway's face Robert Brockway And Here's a Brockway fact I once instigated a small Very reasonable

Almost not even really an attempted coo No follow-up questions of course I heard about that on the news Yeah We're joined again by our By the renowned artist Responsible for three of our theme songs Counting one half

Of the oral knots Zach the Robert Strangler Coons That's an ominous nickname I hope that nickname goes wrong too I have follow-up questions Ah shit Hi Zach

What's happening It's great to have you back Great to be back here Correct me if I'm wrong but still the only Male person of color you've ever had On the show I hate to put you on Blast like that but I don't think that's true

I don't want to count our non-white friends That immediately Triggered the trap of do I start Counting I'm not a racist I feel like it's so deep It's definitely not true in several directions I said male

I remember several females that you guys But yes thank you for policing our diversity There have been several men as well Again I probably can't Count star count Count them Some even more handsome than you See now we got a problem

What are you working on We're working on We actually have some shit I'm excited because normally you ask me We got an archive of things that are years old Go check them out there's a lot of fun there But lately we've got some Activity

Lighten up the channel What's related are you That's always going to be What pays the bills One of them features U2 Which was the 7th Installment in our long running As long as channel

Has been around Redubbing of the entire Star Wars series We did number 7 Sean and Robert show up As the two headed radio DJ Rob Sean Rob Baby did a fantastic job

That is a huge character Throughout the entire thing Multiple parts If I remember in the movie He has that iconic Star Wars line That's got to hurt Maybe that's going to leave a mark One of the two cliches was actually

In the script In the original Star Wars The creature that they are Is the podcast color commentator From Phantom Menace To birds Beyond that This one is going to be a long walk

But I ask you to stay with me It's a matrix video Which is just fucking DOA We're going to make this video Because this movie sucks so bad No one is going to talk about it A week after it comes out Which is true

But in the movie They set up the premise that Keanu Reeves was The creator of the matrix Which was a video game in this world All three movies actually happened In these video games That the people in the matrix are well aware of

And they play So we take on the role of game reviewer Who has a YouTube channel Inside the matrix and he reviews These three games But it's also kind of a movie review Of the films themselves It works

It's very matrixy And now we got there I dropped you guys off We've been on longer walks than that So yeah, there's a few things going on over there Check out the channel It's a lot of fun And that's youtube

Slash oral knots Au Not the way I'm saying it Not the way you want Never the way you want it to be Second best kind of oral knot My notes say banter There's only nine songs to talk about

And three of mine are There's gotta be a morning after Are you playing Elden Ring, Zach? I'm playing the shit out of Elden Ring Are you in there? Oh hell yeah I'm a level 125 wizard What? How can you be that high already?

No but listen There's this place you can go It's a cliff overlooking Like this giant A blood pool? Yeah and you just take out your bow And you just launch an arrow down And it hits the bird for like

One damage out of his million hit points And he gets super pissed off at you And he charges and he falls off a cliff And gives you 11,000 experience points Or ruins, whatever they call them in the game And then you sit down at the fire right next to you And it takes 10 to 15 seconds if you hit him with your first arrow

And it is Everybody knows about the Ostrich blood pool Everybody knows War crimes in Elden Ring Yeah it's very much like Remember in Destiny when there's that cave And everyone found it and for a week Everyone just stood outside a cave

They just blasted the enemies Yeah they put like a little Easter egg in there And if you're listening They probably already patched it out by now Like there's no way they're going to leave this in the game In Elden Ring? No So that same spot to your right

There's a hill that goes down To the Lord Men And if you have like a I have a sword now that just sends a wave of fire All the way down that hill So I just get like 70,000 runes In a heartbeat

I'm like level 17 And I hide a lot I do a lot of hiding 150 or something It's gross I just beat the blood god I send my fire tsunami down the hill It's your fire tsunami game

Together You got to get like us I have a short sword Okay That's it Some naked fellow with a knife I have my starting armor A short sword and I shoot some rocks

This is how I'm making my way I just got to a monster hunter boss That's like the size of a building And he does these giant combos That's like a wave And to get to him You have to like run through his artillery And he just shoots this bow at you

And it is I tried it twice and I'm like this is fucking Nuts And I'm like I haven't like You know Yeah that sounds like Yeah that's a good fight Yeah he seems like a giant asshole

But that's my next big thing Did you summon all the guys? No way to do it Like that game In every situation it's like I have no idea If I'm playing it the way I'm supposed to Or if something went wrong, if something glitched I fell down a well

I fell down a well Right now what I just turned it off To come to this podcast I fell down a well And I'm hiding from ghost cavemen Is what I'm doing I don't have any shoes on We're not playing the same game You're like I have taken on the class

Panhandler I beg for change And beg people to spare my life No I made a One of the selections had A fancy little scepter That does sparkle so I made a magical anime girl Character

My goal is to Find a magical anime girl Transformation spell Some sort of armor spell or something If anybody knows that hit me up Looking for my magical anime girl transformation If there can be Like a preteen spinning in a rose

As like somebody screams gibberish That would be ideal I did get a spinning In a circle emote From a quest that was maybe the saddest thing I've ever seen because there's nothing happy Happens in these games I got it from a

Ghost jellyfish that was actually the spirit Of a dead girl looking for her sister And all she wanted to do was look at the stars And my reward was a spinning Happily under the stars emote That seems pretty anime though It's very anime Like when you describe it, that seems pretty anime

I'll maybe take that These games are always so I paid George R.R.R. Martin $28,000 For that idea Well the running joke There's a sword that you can get in the game I don't know if you found it, but it's a giant sword Made out of a bunch of tiny swords

Oh I do have that sword I found George R.R. Martin's Contribution to the game My buddy said you gotta kill this guy He's got the funniest weapon I dropped it and it bounced straight off my brain I'm like yeah that's just a video game sword Like it didn't strike me as absurd at all

We have crossed this threshold So long ago Did you guys not play Final Fantasy 7? This shit is like 11th most Ridiculous sword They had a guy in Final Fantasy 7 That was self-aware enough to make fun of this sword Right We're fully meta on that

It didn't even occur to me that was silly I think Elden Ring is a lot of people's first time Doing something this nerdy Picking up a sword and XP Going on to a podcast And talking about it Just like every single other podcast

I've listened to this week It's the only thing anyone's fucking doing all week Or Horizon Sure I think people stop talking about that Almost immediately and now all I see is Elden Ring It's for the better I know

Our good friend Jason tweets about Horizon a lot He really likes that game I'll play it eventually I'm glad it's got at least one player I switched to Xbox Ever since the game pass It's just too good not to do

I'm over there full time I have a game pass on my PC So if I jump on there If something free comes out That looks worthy Explains why I only ever see you on To play like Goat Simulator Me and my daughter really like Goat Simulator

You pretend to be a goat The other day she was playing it And there's this evil temple of goats And they all bow to you when you come in And then there's an evil altar And you get on the altar and then you light on fire With a gold throne And she did that like

400 times in a row In a healthy amount This is maybe legitimately strange No longer cute honey She completed some sort of dark ritual Right there in my office It's like the Halloween 3 Song that made kids like heads

Turn into a basket full of snakes Yes, so yes Her head is a basket full of snakes now She's on that road for sure Whatever I have a lot of weird parenting books I'm sure I have one on how to raise a child Whose head is a basket of goats

My Bill Cosby At least the foreword Today we're talking about Movie expositions And in the form of song Again this is our part 3 Of our 11 part series I don't know how many we're going to do

Who knows So One of you gentlemen explain what we're doing Why don't you tell everyone what we're doing here today We take what we think might be The hottest songs from the hottest movies Of the past 30 years Oh we're going deeper than that

This time Oh yeah, that's true You guys go back But any song that is about a movie That it also appears in Qualifies for this list We grab 3 each One is a mainstream cut

One is a wild card I'm still not totally clear on What makes it a wild card Maybe it's just a totally crazy movie And the song barely works I think it's a wild card Because it's just whatever the fuck we want Exactly

It's something that nobody else would ever pick But not because of lack of awareness of it It's a free swim Yeah and that's it We have some judging suggestions Are these your suggestions Rockway Yeah I meant for everybody to chip in But I guess I'm the only one doing the work around here

You did all the work on this I like criteria this time I was like he did it, he did our job for us I had that Paula Abdul idea last time Which I think was probably her best idea It was great I don't know that I beat it But the criteria this time around are

If you were hollering these lyrics on a street corner Would people think you're doing slam poetry Or raving about CIA mystic warfare And which one of those would be higher Points I don't know It's up to you These are just jumping off points for the discussion

Yeah sometimes raving about CIA mystic warfare That's going to get you a lot of points And other times maybe it's better that you're doing slam poetry I don't know how many people have ever said That sentence in the history of mankind But somebody Probably The next criteria is

This song just came on at a junior high dance How busy are the chaperones right now Alright Are they making room for Jesus Is this time to enforce that And finally It's 2009 and Sufjan Stevens Just did an ironic folk cover of this song

Is it a hit That's a I like all the context that brings to it Yeah like I'm not a big Sufjan Stevens guy Is he saying anything everyone would know Like if you're cool If you were cool in 2009

Not now I feel like he was at least aware That he is a thing that he does I know he's a thing He's just a real kind of way fish Real like folk rocky thing But he would do ironic covers A lot

Well I guess maybe he didn't think they were ironic But turned them into like Beautiful little haunting He's a bard He's like a midwestern bard I maybe Didn't give him a fair chance because While I do not resent

By whiteness some things are just Too white for me That skewed too far White yeah I was like I can't touch this Shit I'm saying it's 2009 specifically Sufjan Stevens Did this cover

All the girls love him Did he make this one a hit Can his Special Sufjan spin Which is his super move Can that make this a hit And those are our criteria Okay those are great criteria

Are we starting with mainstream Deep Cut or Wildcard Let's start with mainstream then go Deep Cut Wildcard Wildcards are like the best one So I like the same at the end of the podcast Well Zach you're our guest Why don't you go first sir

Let's get to the other side of whiteness I brought Adam's Family Groove By MC Hammer The other side of whiteness Now you gave me a clip of this So I'm ready to play that Whenever you declare it I'll give you the cue

Can you set up this clip for us I'll set up the clip I got the clip I'll set it up So The movie Adam's Family is fantastic It holds a very warm place At the Atoms Family's Atoms Family's

Atoms Family's Atoms Family's very clearly set up To be us We're like The rest of the world treats them Weird But the weirdness that is just lame Status quo

Shit that the Atoms Family is against We identify with them that way I would say in the movie though They're like People of this town The Atoms Family are so weird and outsider That they're treated as if they are MC Hammer moves in

Apparently he lives next door To the Atoms Family now So my theory is that MC Hammer's lyrics are all about You know He appreciates how the Atoms Family is themselves He likes their style He likes that they're unique

But in the video it tells a different story With what the Atoms Family is about Yeah, he's an asshole He's attacking the Atoms Family Hammer casts himself as the villain He tries to fuck Morticia He goes in deep

Gets in a sword fight with Gomez He's trying to thwart him at every point I'm just saying this is a bold move To tell him this beloved family Write a song about how much they rule And then cast yourself as the villain in the video So it all comes together At the end though

He's clearly Trying to out Gomez On his woman Gomez isn't cool with it Starts a sword fight with him It's a very classy By the book sword fight And then it's just over

I just feel like Maybe Hammer's a third now I feel like the Atoms swing that way He earned his spot in there Yeah, he's in there too I bet the thing gets in there The hand I think it's heavily suggested that the thing does get in there

The movie crosses that line Several times At least with Fester He gets it Didn't the old stranger Yeah Who knows how much of these lyrics came from Hammer moving into a new neighborhood

Is this weird white people shit? Are they spooky and magical Potentially like murderous psychopaths I can't tell the difference I'm from Oakland, I don't know I really identify with this movie Because it's how I feel about white people all the time He does mention Oakland in the song

In one of the main Parenthetical statements Oaktown was kicking it My favorite parenthetical though I don't know why he had to qualify it though But he After having his head almost chopped Or having his head actually chopped off reanimated

And put back onto his body He went over the next day Because he wanted to borrow some pepper For his chicken Why did he want to borrow pepper? For my chicken For my chicken For my chicken

Listen, I don't just borrow pepper all willy-nilly I got a reason I think that's the only thing I pulled out of this song Was that quote I love it because when the hand comes out The fingers were high steppin I'm with ya And then later

He has flavor after flavor Flavor In the parentheses I just like it I think it's a fun thing to put in your song Just a thousand extra words Just snuck in there too Speaking of words

Hammer does this thing in this song a lot That he was messing around with On other songs But he really stepped it up on this one His Rs Where there are no Rs Yeah, I noticed that You rolled the T?

Yeah, and I don't My only theory is that maybe MC Hammer thinks That rolling your tongue during words Is almost like the fancy footwork Of speaking Because he's all about that Is he wrong? I don't think he is

Or maybe he was wrong And that's why he doesn't have any money anymore It was all because of that It took it away I do love that Hammer Is judgmental of the Adams family Their style, what they're about

When Hammer himself rolls into town With a crew that Are mostly dressed like genies Some of them have hair that is in the shape Of objects He brings a full like 1800s circus with him Yeah

I think they're the Hammer Rangers Because they're all kind of The same shape for sure Kind of the same style But slightly different Yeah, he roll calls them at 1.2 I think Swoop, Goofy and Randy I don't know if you guys specifically

Naming those guys I don't think that's their names They don't have ridiculous fun names Swoop is pretty good Which one was the one That looks like the McDonald's head chef The abolition man You know what I mean

You know exactly what I mean Then there was the guy That had like the fifth element hair There was the guy that would like Put his legs on top of his shoulders Yeah, he had a contortionist move This is a heist crew is what this is He's gonna heist him

He's gonna stuff himself in the bucket This was the Adams family movie Where they had like a treasure or something This is his heist crew That's a heist crew You just have to stuff that weird tiara hair High top fade he had into that bucket Let's take a break from the movie

Exposition and just write the movie That's the podcast today now We're gonna write the heist movie Where MC Hammer and his dance troupe Heist the Adams family We'll call it Hammer's 308 That dude would like fill a stadium And just barely break even

At this height he would just completely pack stadium Charge like $20 a ticket Have 400 backup dancers And then go home Certainly making barely any money Yeah, and people talk about it Like he's like He's like a

Like the Jesus of Like high scale performance Yeah, because he went broke Supporting his friends and family He did whatever he could to make sure Everyone was taken care of The pick me up tale You think it is

The dude's hurting really bad A thing going around Twitter recently got viral Where it was like him and I think Shook Knight and Biggie and Tupac And everyone's like Look at Hammer, totally out of place with all these gangsters And everyone's reaction to that was like

No, no, no, he's the most gangster Of all of the gangsters And I'm like this seems like some retconning To me That's where the lyric came from That was actually Shook Knight that said that Please He's like

I'm the voice of reason in this situation Jamie, let's beep all the s*** He will murder us Yeah He's getting out at some point He's still alive, right? He's not one of the... I think he's still alive

Yeah, well I think it's a great song I think it's a fantastic song It's a little embarrassing I think maybe the origin of the song Because the Addams Family movie When it first came out was like a revival Was the original show like the 60s Maybe 70s

Yeah, maybe even the 50s Right, it's old And so they were like we need the kids to understand That the Addams Family is cool Let's bring in someone hot and fresh Who will always be cool and relevant Always be cool and relevant forever This will not age the movie

Like I kind of knew At the time even as a white kid Like MC Hammer was not like The real s*** And yet when Addams Family came out And MC Hammer did a song for it This seems like a sell out movie For someone I already associated with being

Just a spectacle of that See I was like this is the real s*** This is the real s*** For my s*** Well There it is Yo Cuts in it

I'm out of here Kick and the slapper friend Kick and the slapper friend I like that he keeps s*** He thought that line was so good He put it in the chorus Kick and the slapper friend I just assumed that was a black thing I've never heard

It's from the Addams Family Like him and Fester They slap each other Kick and the slapper friend It's the craziest way to say that I think they do the Gomez and Fester do like the Kid and Play, like toe tap thing

And then they slap each other across the face So I think that's Kick and the slapper friend I guess that's what you would call that dance But it just didn't seem like we all agreed on that I think it's a good thing to rhyme with the M'Mushka though So that's Sorry

M'Mushka There's got to be several foods From that region that rhyme with that I came over to buy a little bit of pepper For my Peroshka I like that you told us all in the prep for this Send me 5 to 10 seconds samples of songs

And then Zach sent you the video For This Addams Family song This is all gold I can't do this I specifically requested just For my chicken I wanted to

Because I really like kicking the slap a friend In case people don't remember It was impossible to choose All these clips are going to be too long I get it I don't understand Why he keeps throwing it to Fester though I think Fester is

DJ in this song Thanks Fester for his Whatever his contributions are Thank you Fester He must be the DJ because he's not much of a hype man And those are the only two roles Of a rap crew that I know This is Hammer Lore specifically for the Addams Family song

And he's not There's another guy in a rap crew I know The guy that takes his legs and puts them on top of his shoulders And walks on his hands I know every rap crew has one of those From that era at least I do also like in the middle of the song He just

Remember my other song This term that exists only In one song that I wrote We got time to do another song in this song It's legit So I'm just going to do this You guys can cut it if you want Going in

I'm saying it's the Addam Oak song in the middle I'm not Little f**king Comedina in the middle of my song You're telling me Brockway what did you bring for your mainstream Are we doing judging criteria Or are we skipping it Street corner

Holler and Addams Family lyrics I think you'd be insane I think people would think you're insane They would think you're doing slam poetry Or raving about conspiracy theories I think if you were dressed and styled Like MC Hammer I think people would assume it was slam poetry

I think we're all picturing a world Where Addams Family doesn't exist But if you did say these lyrics In this world we live in Where Addams Family is a real thing Then it would just sound like an advertisement For like an Addams Family kids menu Thing

Or Addams Family value There's nothing more sell out than this song We run into the horror movie problem When you introduce a monster Do you acknowledge That we live in a world where Vampire fiction exists And we discover what vampires are

I think the Addams Family Does exist in this world It would just sound like an advertisement This is an elaborate Sign spinner Junior high dance Are the kids getting down I can vouch for that

I fucked to this song How could you not It was tricky because you had to Do that crazy fancy footwork side to side dancing So it was tough to get your grind on Like you had to really target in We like, it's called the Chinese typewriter by the way Oh boy

That's real It's unfortunate The key is you got a lower one shoulder A lot of people forget to lower the shoulder I think Yeah I was too upset to focus on like Trying to get to the booty Which was just moving around wildly

It was so difficult to track Breaking heat lock left and right It was like trying to stop two dogs from fighting Coming out Gotta get in close to switch to guns Switching to guns I don't think Sufjan Stevens Is saving this one

He's not It falls apart big time without the You think he can do that Full my chicken line and fuck that Oh dude They're like come on Sufjan You don't season your shit It would be so exhausting because

I think in his version each of the parentheticals Would be like him stopping and like pointing at you Like stopping the song to say it And I think that would just get exhausting after the first verse It would And since this song is verse Chorus verse chorus chorus chorus chorus chorus It would just become exhausting

After a while And I don't think Sufjan is too legit I think he's the right amount of legit I think he's probably quit I think So I think by the judging Suggestions It's not a strong choice

But we still have two more to do Right We're going I'll do my mainstream pick I picked Venom by Eminem And it's just It's one of my favorites Not necessarily because of the song

It's not like the song is all that strong Super memorable But it was written in 2018 The movie It is not like a 2005 reboot that you missed Somehow It was in 2018 And it's such a like a middling forgettable movie

I watched it and I was like Yeah, that'll leave my brain like immediately And then the credits came on And it's Eminem Doing an expository rap And I fist pumped I ran around the couch I was just so happy

Little like a salad bowl That's Venom Right at the top They said, hey, we want a Venom theme song And he's like, well, I'm a freestyle rapper This will take me 40 seconds And then he just was like

Ta-da Yeah, let's speak because he came up with like Everything kind of like my name is Eminem Venom kind of sounds like that This is going to be This song is about ends and ends I would like to introduce you to my song Eminem

And that's it Yeah, the lyrics get... It's just It's obviously freestyle At least it was at one point with no rewrite Yeah, the section of lyrics I believe I brought For my clip There it is

It's coming out Elephant manure Hell, I meant cah-loo-up I get all high When I've smelled the scent of elephant Maneuver, hell, I meant cah-loo-up Yeah, so insane I think the only requirement

From the studio is like, listen Say Eddie Brock Say Venom Do whatever else the fuck you want Because that's the best we're going to get This is like 17 ideas tumbling down the stairs It is fucking madness Fucking madness

In a great way, obviously Marvel that Eddie Brock is you And I'm the suit, so call me Venom He tries to make it a metaphor That he is the parasite to you Well, specifically to the kids

Who grew up listening to him And now you are like Driven insane by me Eminem and I'm responsible for you That's how we kind of wrap up The song, I guess He's taking a lot of responsibility And in the video at that point

He does turn into Venom In case you missed the metaphor He does have a CGI face melt Which the video is The video is great too It's great It's The spirit of Eminem

Possessing the bodies of young People of color Let's not just Let's go over exactly what it is He records a track on a CD The CD becomes black because of I assume all of his Venom That he has spitted

Well, it's the Venom that he is spitting You see that turns the track black A person of color finds this CD By a white rapper and listens to it And becomes possessed By the parasite that is Eminem and I don't think he thought through All the implications

He actually listened to the CD though Because the kid was rocking an iPod So I think he just put the CD On his person He starts listening to it and like Yeah, this is pretty good So I think maybe they didn't do All of the world building

That you would expect from this video I know just even in 2018 I'd say even like 2010 If I found a CD on the street I don't know if I have anything to play it with Speaking of dated things He does call someone Retarded in this song

In 2018? Yeah, he's I feel like someone should have explained to him That we don't say that anymore In fact, he probably beeped that I already did the gay thing Now I gotta do this too You're gonna take all my lyrics away

It rhymes with so much Garden That's it, but I use it a lot I talk about gardens a lot Garden Anyway, in the video the parasite then starts jumping To a bunch of other people It infects a little kid

Gives it to his mom and infects a very old white man So you get the classic gag Of an old white guy rapping What? And then of course it infects a chihuahua And he raps I mean, we've got every comedic sensibility Of 1990s commercials

On display He accidentally wrote Big Mom It Has Three Yeah, I think he else It's like following the rules of that Remember that Denzel Washington movie Fallen Do you ever watch that? I don't remember it at all It was like a demon possessed people and it could pass through touch

Okay You should see Fallen I remember that It's entertaining It seems to be Fallen part two Except the part where the dog then Contact with the dog's pee Still has the same power as

Yeah, the dog pisses Black And that possesses like a white woman Because again, we are just We learned comedy in 1997 From Taco Bell commercials And here's what it is

Your cuto venom Does the movie Fallen have a rapping chihuahua? Yeah, but not the pee thing So it's a misstep I mean at one point Denzel's like Voice and personality does infect A rapping chihuahua And he does spread it to a white woman

But not with pee There's a little bit of pee So yeah, the video's weird It's uncomfortable when he infects Like young Black people He talks about how he's a parasite Like a parasite infecting black culture

Are you really Doing this on purpose? And then you get the awkward thing where He possesses like White guy and then that guy's got to do Fresh like have flavor With his hands So that's embarrassing in the opposite direction

Flavor in parentheses Little flavor, yeah, that's probably what the director said For that guy. He's like how do you want me to move? Do you want me to act like I mean it's like It's like those people Right? I mean I don't want to say I don't think I can say the word

M&M's here, I don't want to like Appropriate black culture It's appropriating like that's too much That's too many levels So does this hold up I think if This is prime Ranting about CIA mystic magic

Oh yeah, if you're A guy on the corner Spitting like this It's basically just spoken word already Just take the beat away And you're like this is Deep state like mystic warfare You would never think this was slain poetry

And to be clear Robert didn't Just take random words From different parts of the song That's one set of bars Yeah, those are all in a row Arranged in that order Definitely a tin foil maniac I think this

The globalists say that The globalists in a new world order I don't think that's what The globalists say The globalists in a new world order The globalists in a new world order The globalists in a new world order I don't think the kids are fucking to this

Yeah, this ends the dance They're taking this opportunity to get some punch I don't know how to dance to him mumbling Like he was like 90% of the song Here's what would happen is Some kid would know every word Because he carefully memorized it Just amazingly embarrassing for everyone

And he'd be head banging out there Yeah, he'd have no idea people were making fun of him He's the Joker kid right He's the kid that does Joker makeup whenever he gets the chance 2018, yeah, he'd still be rocking The Joker shirt Every Halloween

I studied the blade, that kid I think I would listen To a Sufjan Stevens of this I would absolutely would I need you to look at the lyrics I need you to look at the length Specifically of the lyrics There's not a lot of chorus in there

And it's eight pages long This would be a 40 minute album From Sufjan Stevens And I would listen to it in 2009 I wouldn't listen to it now I would try to get laid with it in 2009 Sure So I did a thing too

I just had a curiosity I always just kind of dipped down to the comments for a second And I just did my best To pull maybe like The most defining comment from each video And M&M's Is the weird kid At the dance, wrote this comment

M&M makes music that isn't just music But a story It never gets old because he has the reason to say it It's not just words piled up to rhyme What about the dog It's so specifically his word Words piled up to rhyme What about the dog?

I fucked that up, the what about the dog Was a response to that guy's comments What about the dog? Where's the dog in this story? Yeah, your reason to say it Amazing I brought For my mainstream

Iron Eagle From 1986 By the band King Cobra And fuck yes, that's spelled with a K The video has them In boot camp getting chewed out by Lou Gossett Jr. who did not Give this video shoot his best effort

It's obviously Inspirational It's about doing whatever you want And not knowing when to stop Iron Eagle It's also about never Iron Eagle Giving up Iron Eagle Iron Eagle Like

It starts with I can do anything When I choose, I got everything But I got nothing to lose Let's see what else does he say Against all odds, I'll come out on top Because I never learned the meaning of what meant stop I think it was a song Maybe about learning how to take off a bra

And then they went in and just added Iron Eagle 15 times later There's a bit in there that utterly mystified me Where he says Don't try and bring my soul to the ground My spirit remembers old mountain magic Sounds This is like my favorite type

Of music by so much I never learned the meaning of what meant stop This clip is a full minute long I couldn't decide what to cut This part though Iron Eagle I'm just banging my head Like a fucking idiot

Never say that What I like about this chorus Gotta get that guitar solo I'll let it ride Okay, Lucas the junior will not You're just gonna play the whole I've got the rest of the album here Let's just listen to that

I was head banging to the chorus Because I felt like the need to do it But this man, the lead singer of King Cobra Was not head banging during the chorus He looked like he was helping somebody off camera With an American flag behind him Uncomfortably I think he was supposed to be on a treadmill

He was walking He was lean walking on a treadmill And it made him look like he was just They only filled him from the neck up And when you lean walk on a treadmill With a flag it looks like you're fucking While you're singing He's having sex with the American spirit

In that shot There's one of the guys in the band Looks just like Murder Face from Death Clock I think he was fucking that guy Is he the only one that didn't look like A Nazi clone Yeah The one with the head of our mustache

Crimped Halloween wigs of like Lady punk rocker that you'd get at Walgreens They all had that wig on Makes them like shave their head But they didn't shave their head, they just like They got nice Yeah I was never in the military

But I'm pretty sure that that mustache isn't Regulation They wouldn't have let it crawl down I think they're Navy pilots in Iron Eagle They're not Air Force pilots So this would be Navy Boot Camp Where I don't know if they shave your head But they do give you a nice business haircut

Top Gunware Navy Pilots That's the movie they're ripping off I just assumed they were also Navy pilots Yeah, probably But The band was founded by I found some Wikipedia Sourcing so this is

Maybe not true But it was founded by Carmen Apis who toured with Ozzy Osbourne for a bit in the early 80s But his wife hated him And so Sharon Osbourne Fired him And of course, thank God for her because it gave us The best song you'll ever hear

On this second sequel to a movie theme song podcast Episode 35 years later So thank you, Sharon Osbourne for that Anyway, the video play rules Yeah And I don't think they have what it takes at the beginning of the video But then by the end of the video course

Iron Eagle, they have what it takes Yeah, they aren't it There are, I think The correct amount of jets flying across the screen To imply that they are, in fact The correct amount of jets I think there were the correct amount of jets in this video In general

Which was to say too many Too many I noticed that there's five guys in the band And then they take off in four F-16s They left most of them One of them is sitting on the other one's left Or two of them have co-pilots One of them is alone and the other jet is empty and flying out of control

I don't know how they distributed them One of them didn't make it And it's up to you to guess which But however they arranged themselves It's clearly Iron Eagle The winner today, that's my case for Iron Eagle Parentheses, never say die Parentheses, for my chicken

Street corner, this is totally slam poetry This is good slam poetry Good slam poetry This draws a crowd This is like more than just a psycho ranting This is like inspiring people that Are too close Can you imagine going up to some stranger space

And screaming never say die Iron Eagle Oh, fuck I wouldn't even have to know what Iron Eagle was I would just feel it Like an Iron Eagle is a symbol that speaks to us all Yeah With no bad connotations

Yeah I keep singing it though, you can't sing it If you're a psycho and you're slam poet Poeticing this on the streets You just gotta say, never say die Iron Eagle, like you gotta just speak it I think this is Not going to land in a middle school dance

Yeah You got a few dudes air guitar out there They're low on air guitars They're made-in-less as they would say in Elden Rain Yeah, they'd be made-in-less Fingerless and made-in-less No buttholes to put those in Only Elden Ring fans would get it

Which is everyone Which is everyone now, yes I think Steven rips this one up Oh yeah I'm going to send this to him This He's probably not busy, right? I don't know

So it bombed at the high school dance As a folk song, it rules And it also has a fantastic YouTube comment The 80s, when it was cool to love your country Alexis, great times Great times He's not wrong

Loving America was a good time It was a little more fun to love America in the 80s Yeah, absolutely So obviously I'm the winner I mean, there's just no question Yeah I'm not usually four people Declaring themselves the winner of anything

But in this case, I'll allow it It's spiritually appropriate It's the spirit of Iron Eagle You don't even know what it is to lose You remember the mountaintop magic Of the old man Whatever the fuck he's talking about So Brockway, why don't you start

With our What, what do we call it? Deep Cut? Deep Cut, yeah I don't know how Deep Cut this was But I'm doing it anyway Docking Dream Warriors, because I brought The Fat Boys doing the Freddie Rap

You've got Freddie on lockdown at this point Yeah, I've got to bring I think there's one more God, this song's fucking sweet You can picture what the logo For this song looks like Those are exactly what every band member Looks like

They look like Jim Yeah, they look like Jim We're not a gender swaps, Jim No, just Jim Full confession, I woke up this morning With this song in my head Straight up, just that part It's unrelated to the long past

No, no, no It was fully related to that But for some reason, this one buried itself In my brain more than anything else The Dream Warriors I'm like, yeah, snooze It was fully Taken over my brain

You were a warrior in your dreams I was dream warrior in, yeah You have fucking dominated whatever Nightmare child molester is I was shredding the skins in a furnace In hell Yeah, the video Clearly, the song is great

It's one of those songs where there aren't A lot of lyrics to call out Five lyrics over and over again But the video They fucking sell those lyrics though, yeah The video is, it does my favorite thing Which I feel like is lost today Where

They recut footage of the movie So it looks like they're in the movie The band is in the movie It's great and it should be every song From every soundtrack It's a master class In that technique because they start the Video

They're recutting footage of her Making Freddie's house out of popsicle sticks But it's a fucking docking house And it's like, of course That is so dope I was making The Docking House You guys know The Docking House where Dockin lives I had to stop for a second

Was she a Dockin fan in the movie Or am I forgetting And then it showed the actual house As it appeared in the movie She was trying to deal with her mental illness Through crafts and Dockin was like For the lore of this, we all live in the same house And she knows about it

And it's called The Dockin House And it's haunted by Dockin And then she travels Into The Dockin House Of course and that's where the rest of the video Is The endless halls of The Dockin House The maze like the labyrinth

The house of leaves style Never ending house Of Dockin So we could safely assume at this point That it's Freddy's contract That he has to be involved in every Expository song He's willing to

Are you going to say no If he's like I want to do a little bit I want to do a little bit for this I get the idea he goes from studio to studio And says hey guys are you doing like a freddy Wrap today Actually we are Today's your lucky day

I got my wardrobe in the car He doesn't understand why there are really only Two years where that always worked It worked once And that's all we needed He never stopped after that But yeah She travels to The Dockin House

And encountering Dockin Who I think much like MC Hammer cast themselves as sort of The villains of this They seem like kind of antagonistic At first She looks into the freddy Furnace where he hides all of his

Really evidence And the drummer appears Manifests there And that's like the first time we see Dockin And it's kind of terrifying They recut like the sandworm scene Where he's burrowing through the walls And then instead

Once it comes to the wall outbursts the guitarist From Dockin And he's just fucking shredding I think she's on board at that point As he like sandworms through the walls That's what was helping I think that is the turning point Where she's like oh alright

That's pretty fucking sweet Sandworms through the wall Yeah okay I'm on board with this And then at the end they all turn the power of rock On freddy And it is the power of rock and roll that defeats him And he wakes up like Zach said

He has to do a skit in every video He wakes up going oh what a nightmare Who were those guys Dockin Dockin I just hired a contractor to hang a whiteboard in my office And he fucked it up so bad He put like five extra holes in the drywall

And I'm like Jesus Christ he fucked that up Like the guitarist for Dockin He's like dude I know exactly what you're talking about You know what You didn't even have to say it I know I docked in this job I docked the shit out of this job That's what we call it It's whatever contractor calls it

I'll be docking my pay after this one Slam poetry Am I waving Slam poetry I think Jamie leave it in I'm trying to distract Why aren't you letting me Let me bathe in my mistakes

I think the slam poetry This This does pretty well This might be CIA mystic warfare territory though Yeah they would be dream warriors Maybe tonight you'll be gone Or you

This has that perfect sweet spot of Exposition song Where it's like it doesn't quite Explain the movie It's obviously from the film dream warriors But like he's not saying Freddie's in the house and we've got to run from Freddie It's like my eyes are heavy with the unknown

You know it's like It's very mystical and poetic Rather than you know directly about Freddie Krueger Yeah I think it lands in the middle I think it's slam poetry by a lunatic Like you wouldn't trust it But you definitely know he's doing a performance Like he did the MK ultra drugs

And this is the slam poetry That's a result of it If he had no knives on him You'd be fine standing near him But he would have knives on him Yeah I think junior high dance I actually think this has that tempo

That in the right era It has a chance I think this is like a slow dance You could slither all over somebody There's some writing There's like the girl in the leopard print miniskirt Is definitely getting down With the big hair

The hair that you could like throw a pencil through And it would stay And it's going to get caught in your cross-earing This is peak sexiness Yeah I'm feeling it This is probably a good folk song too Oh yeah, so if John Stevens could do it Probably the best one yet

It's about the right length Yeah And he would do it Yeah And if we're going by the criteria That I just wild carded in here With YouTube comments This one's probably one of the better ones

Here it is For those that don't know Don Docken has an absolutely hilarious story About filming this video that involves Robert Englund Dressed in his makeup for Freddie Cutting up lines of coke with his claws If that's not the most metal shit in existence There's no way that's true, but it rules

Yeah I think if I was at a party with Robert Englund I would make up that story too Or if I was just at a studio where he came in And said, hey guys, are you doing a funny Crooker song? I'm here Then I would also make up that story

We totally did nightmare coke Off his murder weapons Cause that's what everybody wants him to be But I feel like he's more of the guy that like Nurses of Fanta Like at a party I think that's his vibe But you're like, man, I wish we partied

I wish he used claws He's gotta stay ready, you never know when Someone's gonna call him and say, hey, hey, we need you over here In Studio City, we're recording A Freddie Crooker rap Bust a few lines, Ken, do you have anything That rhymes with My name is Freddie and I'm here to say

My I choose Ging Chat Mushy Som Which Of course was called Super Cop in America The theme song is also called Super Cop, and it's by DiVo

I'd never pieced together that it was DiVo that did this And listening to this, I was like, how can you Not piece together that it's DiVo? And the chorus of the song is Super Cop Super Cop I'm a Super Cop poses with just super cop, super cop.

They know, they don't like sports fans. They chant it like like a group of police wizards that are summoning super cop. Right. Like it's kind of menacing. I have my notes. It's something a Jean-Claude Van Damme would hear right before the mini boss emerges

from an abandoned donut shop. Like, like the crowd is super and Jean-Claude's like, oh, shit. Oh, it's happening. Super cop. I have to kick this guy onto his own stun gun here. Yeah, this is borderline, like crossing over to maniac cop territory.

Yeah. If it was maniac cop, I think you could play the same song, every lyric the same. So the, it doesn't stick to the movie much. I think they just said, hey, we want you to do a song called super cop. You have seven minutes, write it.

It's Jackie Chan. It's super cop, go. Okay. I think I know who that guy is. And I think I know what kind of martial arts he does. The song's about an unkillable policeman warrior throwing himself a dick first into his enemies and annihilating them with karate. I think the whole thing has about 70% too many syllables

and what's his name, Mark's mother's bar. He always seems out of breath and like a few words behind. Anyway, I have a clip. Let me, let me play the super cop clip. There's police sirens in the background too. You've been fading this clip in. Yeah. My body's a machine made to synchronize

Every time the call to action makes me rack goodnight When the fortune of the rockin' to the tearin' night Then I shift to overdrive It's time to swap the rides on my super cop When I, wow, wow, wow I'm a super cop I'm a standard turn cop And I can't be stopped

I'm a super cop I love it. Now there's a lyric in this song. I start to pulverize. There's a lyric in this song where he says, they locked me in a rocket made of flesh and bone. I'll meet you in the war zone with my fists of stone. And that's fucking sweet.

Fucking badass. That's my only note for this whole movie. I don't think that's about Jackie Chan because he will fight you with the fish. I think, I think that's, that's like a band dance. It's like a Bruce Lee. There's a lot of, a lot of martial arts star where that's like, they, they wait their whole lives

for somebody to say this about them. That's all they want. But Jackie Chan is like whipping out fucking tennis balls or something over here. I don't want to fight. I don't want to fight. I mean, that's 90% of his fights are him running away while asking not to fight

while he like strangled somebody with a brawl. If you introduced Jackie Chan as a man trapped in a rocket made of flesh and bone, he would just blush so hard. He would like do that coin like over his shoulder, like cheap pinch, you know, it's- He would ring a little T-Bow. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.

Cover his mouth with both hands. There it is, ladies and gentlemen, the flesh and bone rocket himself in the- Don't meet you in the war zone with his fists of stone. He will begin to pulverize. Supercop, maybe my most watched. There's another line in there that's kind of weird where he says, they say if you're a punk,

he'll aim straight for your belt. Yeah, what was that? Which is really weird and they rhymed it with butt. So I don't think there's a big rewrite process on this. I think it was very much like the Eminem venom rap where it's just like- Freestyle this? Fucking let's freestyle it.

And there's no, there's no fail condition when someone says, please write us a Supercop song four years after the Hong Kong release. So anyway, there's another one that says, what he sees just makes him wanna cry. I'm a cop now, a Supercop now. He works alone cause if he don't, he'll die. He'll die.

Yeah. So the song is insane and it's perfect and it's another clear winner for me. Yeah. There's another line where he goes out to find a girl and it's just a Supercop now, he goes out to find a girl. I'm a cop now. Street Profit and CIA Warfare.

Yeah, I think this is going CIA Magic Warfare. Going CIA, right? Yeah. He's out here prophesizing about the rumored Supercop that's being built in the lab. And then just that's really fits because at some point you're like, I'm the Supercop now.

It's definitely like the turn I mean, I could take where you're like, oh yeah. I was the one built in a lab. I was put in a rocket and flesh and bone. I saw him revise the manifesto in his head just now and it's going to take a turn. Give me your belt. Give me your belt, punk.

High school dance, this ends the night. I feel like you could maybe in some scenario, maybe you could thrust specifically to the chant. But it's like a slow thrust. It's super back and then cop forward. It's like super cop. It's not an elegant thrust. I could do that.

Yeah, I mean, try it. Give it a shot right now. Just super cop. But super. I mean, the rest of the song, you're doing a sarcastic robot. Like it's fucking insufferable. You can't.

Kills the dance. Yeah. You got maybe the Devo kids out there doing the sarcastic robots, but then they wouldn't be at the dance probably to begin with. I'm just saying. Get the limbo stick out.

Like it's fucking over. Zifton Stevens? Do you see it? I don't know if I see it. I think it would take too long to finish. I think you got the M&M problem where the sheer number of lyrics, he's going to be there all day.

Also without that chant, like without very specifically that chant, just him singing super cop over and over again for like 12 minutes. He'd have to really change it. Super cop, super cop. Yeah, that sucks. Yeah, hate it.

Okay, maybe I didn't win that one. Zach. The YouTube comment is great. It's a, this might be the worst song ever written with the follow-up, then why are you here? Yeah, but you heard it. You heard it. It's in your brain.

I brought it. He expect he went to the fucking official YouTube video. What was he searching for? If not just super cop soundtrack. Yeah. There's no way to get there on accident. The algorithm's not going to put that in front of you in any scenario.

So I brought 80s classic Thrashen. You guys did RAD recently, which was pretty great. This is in that zone of exploitative extreme sports cinema. Do we know which one came first? I didn't look it up. I would guess maybe Thrashen. It feels pretty old. We could probably look it up real quick,

but I'm just going to say Thrashen. RAD was like 1986, I think. RAD feels like it was ripping off a formula that was successful somewhere else. Thrashen was 1986, too. Oh, okay. It's probably the same production team. They just went out back to back.

Warfare. Are we doing the skateboard one of the day or the bike one? I fucking can't keep it straight. So Thrashen does have the honor, though, of having a fucking major celebrity attached to it. It's Josh Brolin is the star. The most superhero man ever.

Maybe of all time. Who's been in the most comic book movies, I think. Maybe. Can you name them all? Well, there was Thrashen. That was my favorite. There was Thrashen. Deadpool, Thaddle, Thrashen.

Fuck. Is there one more? There's several more. There's Cable and Thaddle, so that's all I know. Jonah Hex. Oh, Jonah Hex. If you want to count, Jonah Hex. Old Boy was the comic book, too.

Oh, right. I am a nerd. I am a nerd. I don't have that in my notes. That's just in my brain. That's just ready to go. Quick fire. I think Karen Chew asked me that on Twitter

like six months ago. Name all of that. Yeah. Josh Brolin's comic book movies. Over Twitter so you can look it up. I live a weird life, I guess. Playing Elden Ring and thinking about Josh Brolin. Thinking about Jonah Hex.

It filmed Jonah Hex. Man, this section is just like whatever happened in Jonah Hex, I did not see it. Didn't know. I don't know anybody who saw it. Did you see it, Sean? Did you actually watch Jonah Hex? I probably watched seven or eight minutes of Jonah Hex.

That's the most minute for me. I've read the comic a little. I like a nice Western comic. I dabbled in some Jonah, yeah. Well, Thrashen is the opposite of a Western. It's a California dreamin' skateboard good time. There's no stakes in this movie. There's no character arcs.

You wouldn't know that by the song. I guess the villain has probably the best arc, who is Robert Russell from Weird Science. Robert Downey Jr.'s fellow bully. Yeah. He's in charge of a gang called the Daggers and they settle their grievances with nunchucks with boxing gloves attached on one end of them.

It's fuckin' sweet. Well, that's nice of them. Yeah, that's the raddest shit of all time. It makes it three times deadlier. Yeah. You could really deliver a solid hit with a fuckin' spinning boxing glove. You don't break your nunchucks on every blow.

I think a Ninja Turtle actually came with, like there was a line of toys where they were like, this one's the Caribbean one, but I'm sure there was one that had a boxing glove at the end of his shit. Anyway, the song, I thought it was, I made this one of my picks right after Meatloaf died. I'm like, well, Meatloaf had some pretty stupid songs

for a man who died for stupid reasons. So let's go with Thrashen. And he, so this song doesn't exist in its entirety anywhere. There's no Thrashen soundtrack. There's no, this song didn't come out on a Meatloaf CD at any time. So the video that I linked you guys to, somebody took the first part of the song from the opening

and then glued it to the end from the end credits with the last half of it was, but the lyrics are pretty, I guess my favorite part of the lyrics is when he keeps saying there's nothing else left to say and then he proceeds to say many other things about Thrashen. There's Meatloaf. Yeah.

Meatloaf will start a song just in the middle of a song 11 different times. Yeah. I think he's ad-libbing too. I think we just went with an all ad-libbing. Yeah. Like all star masterclass here. Yes, no, they didn't even tell him what this was about.

Like he didn't really know that this was about skateboarding. He certainly didn't know the vibe of the movie because the song is just about him becoming like a fucking supernova in the sky and exploding out of his boundaries. And it's cut over footage of Josh Brolin, like just kind of goofing, just like street goofing, skating around, saying hi to folks.

Yeah. Well, Meatloaf is like, yeah, he's a supernova in the sky. He does kind of come alive though. Yeah, it's a weird movie. Josh Brolin starts out the movie with everything he needs to win. Girls love him at a glance. I mean, obviously he's Josh Brolin in like a ripped teenager's body.

He's got all the skate skills. He doesn't improve at any point. If anything, he just proves time and time again that he doesn't need even his whole body to win these skate competitions. So I guess he is sort of a supernova of the West Coast skate competitions, but other than that, I don't think this song is.

I don't think he was thrashing an overdrive like a fire brigade. I wouldn't I wouldn't describe. He also doesn't go to Frisco Bay. Seems like a cool guy, yeah. Frisco Bay. That's what they call it. Frisco. Yeah, that's the locals call it. That's the local Friskin term.

They also they call themselves Friskins. I don't know if you guys know that. Downtown Frisco. Yeah, everybody says it. Yeah, and then you and then you're just supposed to blurt out where you have like a fuck buddy. Oh, and I have a woman in East L.A. Look, OK, it sure.

Thanks, me love. That's his exotic booty call. Yeah, there's those women in East L.A. There's a special type of lady. There's a part of this movie that's pretty hilarious. Have you guys seen this movie anytime recently? Tiny child, not since I was probably a teenager. It's worth checking out.

It's it's definitely a good dose. Yeah, I'm going to watch it now. Me love commits me. I think he's I think it's on prime right now. It's now's the time. Sweet. He's on a date with this woman. This is his dream girl. They meet each other wordlessly at a skate demonstration.

They just run off together and go on a date that has zero dialogue. It's just more music. They're having a great time. Smiling a laugh and he's teaching her skateboard tricks. And then they go on another date where there is no music. They actually talk and the only thing they talk about, they sit down. He takes a big sign and goes, so if I get sponsored, this is my design.

You want to see this design I've been working on? Let me tell you about my design. And then he's like, fuck it, let's go back to my place. I'll show I drew it. I'll show you my design. It's the worst fucking date that any woman could ever, like, imagine finding her so far. A dude that won't shut up about his bad skateboard design.

I feel like a sexy meat head. I think a good excuse to go back and fuck is probably a good thing to offer your date. You're like, oh, we could sit here and I can try to talk or we could just bang one out. My design I could show you in my apartment. I don't think I don't think any woman in the 80s was was really unhappy when Josh Brolin was like, let's cut the whole dinner part short and just go back to my place.

I think they may have been unhappy, though, when they go back. And he actually does bust out the drawing of the woman and the black widow. She's like, oh, you meant the drawing thing. OK, I really meant drawing. Yeah, yeah, I'm not much of an art critic. I came here to get I came here to get plowed by a fucking champion. Yeah. By a supernova. I came here for some thrashing.

I came here to thrashing overdrive. Do you know what thrashing and overdrive means? I'm worried you don't. I think. Because me, Lofa, and I agree, it's about plowing. So let's get on the same page. Now, I actually pulled a YouTube comment from this one. I would like I would like you to.

Yeah, is it is it yours? I'll just I'll just say that it could be the best movie ever. Still thrashing soon, 30 years after a classic and never die. Eight exclamation points. Was that what you pulled? No, I pulled Meatloaf is a legend. This is his best song, and it isn't even on iTunes, Loll. Still thrashing 30 years after.

I wish I wish I god damn it. Now I wish I had planted a comment of my own on like a burner account. You've got to play that next level chess. That's Star Trek chess. I actually 2D right now. I really like Meatloaf. I have this funny Meatloaf memory. I was watching an NBA game and he came on for a halftime show and just full

Meatloaf like he sang 35 songs in 40 seconds. And he's just dripping sweat and it cuts back to Kenny Smith and Charles Barkley, who are openly laughing like what the fuck was this mystery meat? They just they did not get Meatloaf at all. Cracked me up. Going to be a very certain kind of white. It might be a really white thing. Yeah. What is this?

Oh, shit. Get out. Openly mocking this music legend. All right, let's run it through the criteria, because I think thrashing at the criteria. This is a fantastic slam punk. Oh, hell, yeah, you're winning that one. This is slam poetry, like by definition. I think it works better as slam poetry. Yeah, I think it's a weirdly awkward song.

Yeah, if you do this weird beat poet, like those those pauses and dramatic. Oh, you know what it is? You'd be stomping a lot. You stop it. Yeah, this is this is stomping. Yeah. This would have been about two years old at a junior high dance for me. So yeah, I might have actually danced to it. I don't know. Well, probably not because it's not any actual CD.

You can't get it anywhere. Yeah. You never really sure wish I did. I could have gotten laid for sure. Folks on the right at the right at the at the whitest dance at like a yeah, like a cattle town. You're definitely here in the whitest town. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I grew up in a meatloaf town for sure.

OK, yeah. Then this this slayed at the junior high. We did Bon Jo, if I recall, is 70 to 80 percent Bon Jovi songs at my middle school dances. Oh, so you needed meatloaf to like break it out really good. Yeah, really get the juices flowing juicy meatloaf. You needed meatloaf for like diversity. Yeah, well, we had MC Hammer. Oh, right. Yeah.

Maybe a little digital underground just for to get real wild. That's not impossible. Yeah. Yeah. Probably some of that. And you know, I think it's a good Sufyan Stevens song, too. Yeah, I don't know if I don't think I was qualified to say on this one. I'm still wrestling with the whole folk guy. I don't think it's the best one. Like it's it's again, it's just weird and awkward.

But he puts it in like towards the end. Yeah, takes you out. This did all right across all three of the standards here. Yeah, I'm going to say Dawkins wins. Well, the precedent is if you declare yourself the winner, you win. Just kidding, right? You're right. Yeah, it's funny. You should say that because you absolutely won.

Yeah, Dawkins rules. I think just by by the fact that I woke up this morning, like, yeah, I got singing docking in my head. If you tried to vote against it, I was ready to bring that up. Like you fucked up. You mean the song that you actually dreamed to while you were a warrior? The song I planted in your head that saved your life in your dreams. You from interdimensional nightmare demons.

All right, we're going wildcards now, right? We're moving right through this. This might be our most efficient expository music podcast yet. Well, we're well trained in it. This is our third one. Do you want to start a softsack? Yeah, I can go. I can go in on this one. I brought killer clowns from outer space.

I got a good friend in that movie. Oh, yeah. Who's your friend? Is it Chris Titus? No, he's a stuntman. I mean, one of the clowns, but hell, yeah. Which clown do you know? Which clown? I don't know which slappy.

I don't know. This will be what I know by bits. Yeah, the bits. There's like the the the the puppet show one. There's the pizza delivery one. All the puppet show one was the best. The flying motors, the invisible motorcycle one. He's the clown that puts his legs on his shoulders

and dances on his hands behind him with the tiara hair. Yeah. Yeah. You really had to branch out. Yeah. This song fucking shreds. I I like this movie a lot. I rewatch it very often. And one of those movies where if you if you try to explain it to anybody, maybe 10 years younger than us,

that, of course, hasn't seen it already, they don't believe you. They don't believe you that it don't. And even if they do believe you that it exists, they don't believe you that it's good or that it's. See, I've never gotten anybody to believe me that it exists. That no shit. No, because why would that and somebody funded? And it's like, yeah.

I'm like, yeah, actually, it seems like I had a pretty good budget. No. Yeah. No. What have you told them? It's the only film that these guys ever made. And they were so proud of what they'd done. They felt no reason to ever pursue. That was it. I had killer class matter of space in my head. And I sang I sang my song with my heart to the world.

This has been the world. Listen, my opus. I'm going to sell furniture again. I'm just done. Yeah. Done the show business. Done with the show. The song opens up with that killer ass, like guitar version of like the Ringling Brothers,

Barnum Bailey Circus riff. And you know that, you know, the song, I can't do it. I'll keep trying to do it. I can't do it. Do it. I'm not going to do it. I didn't bring that clip of the circus sounds. Right. Right. I brought this.

That's actually from the movie. Yeah, that's a killer clown trying to communicate with humans. Slide whistle expert. Yeah. Now, this song is so it's got it does some good music video stuff. It's got the actual clowns in makeup in the music video, which I feel like was a big, you know, probably a big pain in the ass to pull off, but they did it.

Huge get those guys were really busy. They were busy. They were all they were doing whatever your friend was doing after that. Does she get the clowns? We got the clowns. We got the fucking clowns. He works at a zoo like an animal preserve. OK, so he was probably doing zoo shit.

And the, you know, he's probably fighting an eagle. Dickies were like, listen, we're making a killer clowns video. Will you will you don this the suit again? Will you put on the polka dots one more time? These guys, they could do it all. They got they got like superhuman strength. They punch a fucking man's head off, you know, with one with one below. They could turn balloon animals into living creatures.

They got a shadow puppets can become monsters. But at one point in the movie, one of them gets arrested. And so, of course, that's what the whole music video is about. And they're like, yeah, we have an old jail. Yeah. So it's about that now. Do you have an old jail? I got one question. Do you have a lady cop that is in short shorts

that we can put in that jail? What year is this? What year is it? 1980s, of course. I'll even throw in a tatteredly dressed hot prisoner to go along with her. They're actually a pair. They do not work separately. And the Raquel Welch, you know. Caveman outfit. Yeah.

So yeah, this whole video is. The clowns are on trial. I guess they're they're due process is afforded to them, even though they are from another planet and they murder people with with a pair. I thought the band was on trial by the clowns. There was a role reversal that you missed halfway through. So it's confusing because the band starts out in jail. Yeah, the plot isn't super tight in this.

It's not. Yeah, killer clowns matter. They lose it pretty fast. Yeah. It's starting with their outfits. The lead singers got like a ringling brother's like ringleader thing going on. Another guy, the drummer thinks he's in a divo video. One guy's Amish straight up Amish. So like he was just disappointing his people and insulting their culture. This is one of those things where you have no excuse for this,

because even if they didn't tell you anything about what the movie is about, they told you the title. So like it's true, the ringmaster guy is. She's like, guys, I'm the only one that showed up in circus shit. What are you guys doing? You make me look like an asshole. Like at most, I expected maybe maybe a confused guy in an astronaut costume. And I would have been working with that.

Something silly, you know, one guy's a straight up deal. I think it might just be Dio. But you're fucking Amish. Where did you get Amish from? Yeah, tell me what Amish, what is Amish? She's like, I had the beard before I knew it. Somebody put this hat on me. They just said, like, you know, that's how you want to live now.

That's you. This movie also has another weird science person. It's got Suzanne Snyder, the blonde girl from. She was like one of the cute girls they were trying to win over. Anthony Michael Hall's girlfriend. Yeah, yeah. I think she's the only person in this film that went on to do something else. And it was weird science.

You just picked all weird science. I think we're in science. Yeah, yeah, I followed through with I see your game and fucking delivered. Yeah, you thought we were overcome with fondness for weird science. We do. Yeah, I feel like if you dive deep enough in Adam's family, you will find. Danny Elfman or somebody like there's a weird science connection in there somewhere as cousin.

That's cousin. It cousin it. Yeah. Nobody. Yeah. If so, you're saying people don't believe you that this movie exists. So we'll use this opportunity to get people to go watch this movie because it's it's required viewing. All right, we should probably tell them what it's about. It's about plans for outer space.

It's about killer clouds, matter of space. You know, all that cool shit we do at the circus. You know, we eat popcorn. We we we eat cotton candy. That's all we appropriated all of that from aliens who have been visiting our planet for hundreds of years to eat to drink our blood after they shroud us in cotton candy. That's where clowns came from, inspired by an ancient alien race.

Do you know the plot of aliens versus predator? It's the same plot as if it's clowns instead of predators. The clout, the clowns were a warning and we should have heated. Brightly colored polka dot, no matter who wins, we lose spaceships. So that I think that just because of the nature of the plot and what the song is about. This goes full into mystic CIA warrior. Oh, yeah. Conspiracy, the territory.

Oh, yeah. This is good street poetry. Yeah. I get I would say more CIA maniac. Just more CIA maniac. Yeah. I mean, you would be the killer clowns are coming. Like that's a genuine warning about the killer clowns that seems to get increasingly desperate. There's a lyric where he says, see a rubber nose on a painted face,

bringing genocide to the human race to the human race. Yeah, that's that's a maniac with like that's a maniac wearing pants wrong and just making a scene. There's there's a knife on him somewhere. You just haven't seen it yet, but you know, it's there. Yeah. Do you have in him from fights he lost earlier? I think it's a song came on in a junior high dance.

Anyone excited about it is a source of danger. They get expelled immediately. Yeah, this is like what changes their mind before they open the trench coat. They're like, this is the kid with the the kid with the Fangoria subscription, who's not a bad kid, but he's just you don't bring him to the dance. You know, it's yeah. Most of them go to the dance with his brother. He's the kids from summer school.

That this is the only change on Dave. Yeah, change on Dave, that's that's who gets down to this. I think that movie's so good. Speaking of good movies, fuck, summer school, another one. Mark Harmon and rewatch Central. Like I'll put that on any day. Yeah. That was one of my go to VHS when I was a kid. Yeah, more of that bitch out.

I think as a folk song, this probably does pretty well. I think it's just enough. He rhymes song. I think so. But the irony is real high. It's real high. He and he also rhymes the word Jacaranda. And I think that's just she enough. Yeah, I think that's he loves it for that.

He would include this just because he's so happy. Somebody else included the word Jacaranda. And so I had that. Yeah, like, oh, I did that too. Every song I do that. You mean the non-indigenous flower that is invaded South Africa? Yes, I love that flower. It's beautiful.

I had to look it up because I had no fucking clue what a Jacaranda was. It's like, what is this lyric? A stock of Jacaranda. That's a. It was almost like. You know, like Dick heads to try to use the word of the day, but it's a word that no one should ever like.

There's no there's a reason why it's not used every day. It would stop a conversation. He's like, oh, like a Jacaranda. It'd be like, Motherfucker, what? Did suck my stock of Jacaranda. I don't know what you just said, but it's pretty sure I'm mad. It is offensive to my people. Well, I'm going to go next.

I'll let Rockway finish us up. Yeah, I'm doing mine about the 1958 movie called The Blob, which was an early Steve McQueen movie. It's about a blob. It's a movie where 13 people die on screen about a mindless horror based animal terror given form. And so they hired Burt Baccarac to

a bouncy and adorable theme song. It's so good. So it's either sarcastic or someone did a terrible job explaining the blob to Burt Baccarac. And I'd argue there's no movie, maybe no thing easier to explain than the blob. I have a clip of the song. Oh, a splotch, a blotch, be careful of the blob.

I get this every song from that mouth pops. Yeah, just every song from that era have to have the lollipop thing. That's definitely going to have a little like just pulling out a single anal beat. This is a movie about people getting dissolved in killer like gelatin. Yeah, 13 people die in that movie.

Yeah, this this has one of the most entertaining YouTube comments that I found. It's just a person coming up with a fake scenario. Confirmed outbreak of level five biohazard aboard the station. All personas contain the outbreak. Cue music. So good.

It's something like a three year old Sunday School student would call soft ass shit. I'm not. Can you guys name? Shit. You already know. You're the rocket. I was going to see if you could name the movie.

Oh, dude, I watched it the other day. Are you fine? Who do you think I am? I say it because it's you. I say you're the rocket man. You're the rocket man. What are you talking about? Just stand in front of the rocket.

Just several more. Stand right there. I'll carefully explain what I'm talking about. That's it. Just a little bit more. Stand in front of the rocket full of bio weapon. A guy brandishing a knife threateningly who still has time to say to shit on.

Was it a rocket man? Elton John. Yeah, rocket, but to shit on Elton John. I don't listen to soft ass shit. I love Tony Todd. He's a legend anyway. Pleasure in cutting you, boy. So to record this song,

they formed a band of five studio musicians and called them the five blobs of this one course. They did this one, two and a half minute performance. And it got to number 33 on the top 100 charts, which is a pretty good hit. That's like a twisted by. It was a Bob. Well, it was a what was 32 that year.

Do you have the list? Let me let me look it up. The goo by the five. I see that. It's such a five. I just never think of like expository theme songs for movies, at least as predating like 70s, maybe. Yeah, it's hilarious to me when you remind me that, like,

oh, right, like every sitcom had a complete expository theme song. Why on earth wouldn't their movies, too? With the 30 number 32. This is for the year was the Book of Love, which is. Oh, shit. That's a famous song. Stands up. Yeah. It was up against some some hitters.

So that means somebody's in that year, somebody's favorite song was the Book of Love and their second favorite was the blob by the blob. Yeah. Well, I imagine it was just like for that week. So the Book of Love probably maintained longer than that was probably a number one hit for it. It could have been a number 10 hit, I don't know. But at some point in history, somebody was like, oh, fuck,

yeah, it's the blob song and turn it off. Yeah, this was that that's a placeholder that means somebody pulled out the record at a party. It was like, guys, get ready to dance. I got this new hit record. Yeah. Everybody start twisting. Maybe you won't get it, but your kids are going to love it.

Your kids are going to love it. So I don't know what happened. But I think we can all agree. What a great win for the blob. Bert Beckerrack and the Internet's me. Unless unless. Hold on. Criteria. Incredible. Criteria.

Is it CIA maniac or is it slam poetry? I think it's probably just by default, CIA maniac. This is a is the blob of aliens. Careful of the blob. That seems like a like it's biotech or something. Right, right. It's crazy word for biotech. Some umbrella corpse shit.

I don't know if you can get out of the nursery rhyme rhythm of it. It's just going to sound like someone doing a nursery rhyme of like an escaped bio weapon. Well, what? Which is lunatic territory. Triple the mania. Yeah. If it just came out in a junior high dance, I honestly think this in this era. Yeah, that's probably killed at that era.

But I think if you put it on today, you're going to get like a lot of like sarcastic Will Forte type dancing and people are going to have a good time. I think this gets the party pretty fun. And I think it also got those chaperones off the floor. I bet there was a dance called the blob that the kids specifically made up and just made it real lewd. And maybe the chaperones are old enough to remember when the blob was number thirty three in their lifetime.

They're like, no, no, no. Chaperones are dancing. I banged to this song and no one else was going to bang to this song on my watch. Like this, I know what happens when you put the blob on. And it's only two and a half minutes. It's the perfect length to bang to fucking fuck. Yeah. So if you on Stevens covers this, I think he actually has covered this. He loves those little pops, those little mouth pops.

Yeah, he does them. I can't even do that. The finger out of the corner of your mouth thing that just like I don't have the. I don't have the right to put a finger in your mouth and pop your I can't. Yeah, I don't have the right the dick suck and power. I don't have the sounds like somebody does. I don't have the volume for it.

Yeah, tear a few layers up that day. Peel great. Jamie, leave that one in. Yeah, put reverb on that one. Put a new tear on the Patreon page. Think about that at night. All right. Well, I brought Man with Bogart's Face by Armando Compian.

And this, you'll never believe it. It was about a movie called The Man with Bogart's Face. You just let me know when you want me to hit that sample. I want you to hit it right off because we're going to talk about it. Yeah, hit it. Yeah, come on. I see him. I see him.

It's like dark, man. Oh, yeah. Oh, it's so fucking good. This is it almost feels like anyone's beating it. Like when you sent this over, I was like, it's like someone went back in time and wrote a song just so you'd win this dumb. So I could win specifically the wildcard category wildcard category about a song specifically about a man that has Bogart's Face

and becomes a private detective. Let me walk you through the plot of the movie really quick. You would assume that they they found a guy who looks a lot like Humphrey Bogart and does, I would say, a C plus impression of Humphrey Bogart. And so they fell in love with this guy so much they wanted to give him a movie. And so you're like, oh, OK, you could make like a new Bogart movie, right?

Or you could put like a little like Bruce Lye element of comedy to it. That's not what they did. The plot to the movie is that a man gets plastic surgery to look like Humphrey Bogart and then figures the only thing he can do is become a private eye, even though he has no qualifications and change his name to Sam Marlowe. And this is his first day. That's the plot to this movie.

It's so deeply insane. It's completely insane. I have a question. Did they make this movie based off? Did they find this guy and say, we got to make a movie where you pretend to be Humphrey Bogart? Yes. Or or did they? OK. Yes. They didn't they didn't write this movie and then say, God, we got to find a guy that looks like no, Robert was a Humphrey Bogart impersonator.

I assume just working in LA and had some sort of right connection that's like, we got to make a movie about it. And then they just went crazy where like you would have to get maiming plastic surgery to look like him. And wait, what? No, we just make like a Humphrey Bogart movie. And you guys are familiar with Robert Bronson, right? No. Who is this? He's this Hungarian dude who looks exactly like Charles Bronson.

Oh, I heard of him. Yeah. So some guy found him. It's like, fucking, we're just going to make Charles Bronson movies with this guy. And then they did. And then they did that. Why didn't they do that here? Why does he have to have plastic surgery for so many? Why does he have to have the mental disability that causes him to become obsessed with plastic surgery to look like?

I do think that this directly inspired the Joker's transformation in the Jack Nicholson version. It's like the same scene with just different lighting. It's the same scene with a completely different take. Like instead of being unhappy, he goes, well, fuck, yeah, well. And I'll tell you, I'll tell you what's going to happen. I'm going to become a private eye and my rates are put it in the song. My rates are in the song for 200 and expenses.

He will take all kinds of chances. I'll take all kinds of chances. He, the craziest part of this entire set up is that this movie came out in the year 1980. It looks like it came out in 1942. It's insane. I couldn't believe it. Why would this movie come out so late? So much later.

Why is why are we revisiting this in 1980? And then in 1980, Humphrey Bogart was like Looney Tunes references. I didn't understand. Yeah, 1980 was not your cultural cachet for Humphrey Bogart references. It was just such a bonkers move in every. 1980, though, was like we talk about 80s movies. And I think we think about like John Hughes and that era. That shit, this this kind of stuff was coming out, though,

like right at the beginning of it. There was this and then it was like another is. I think it's not called Supercop, but it's a movie like that where it's like a cop that's essentially invincible bullets bounce. It's like another madcap comedy that like isn't funny. I don't know. The 80s were funny. 1980 was weird. And it's. Yeah, I guess apparently.

I'm not at all surprised where 1980 was 1950, which is when this movie should have happened. Yeah, makes sense. Like this is a 1950 premise. And yeah, this whole thing plays over the opening where a lot of wacky antics happen or like an old guy looks over and sees Humphrey Bogart driving an old timey car and he goes, what? And it crashes this car and then a cop comes up and it's like, well, you've been drinking.

You think you saw Humphrey Bogart and then he drives by behind him and he's like, he's like ruining lives and in his wake. I'd love meeting this guy and being like, wow, you look a lot like Humphrey Bogart. And then he starts like, I'll try. No, I'm like, oh, my God, you're doing like a whole fucking bit. Oh, Jesus Christ. No, no, you you can't base your life around this. Friend, friend, please. Am I at a party with like celebrity lookalikes?

God damn it. It feels like a I've only been to LA a couple of times, but every time I go there, it seems like that's what you do. If you don't land the gig, you just go be an impersonator on the street and get known for that. This guy got a movie. Maybe he's the reason why people keep trying it. That's that's a legitimate avenue.

Right. He does look like Humphrey Bogart. So to undertake this venture, he surely had no other dreams. Like your only dream has to be like based off of I look kind of like that guy. Right. Like you don't want to you don't want to write a killer play. If you look exactly like Humphrey Bogart. Right. You you want to be the man with Bogart's face,

which, again, is the title of a real movie and a song. Man, the song is the man with Bogart's face. Have you ever been to a party with celebrity impersonators? Dig dig. It's no, I would. You're the only one that's not a celebrity impersonator. I've been to like probably 2000, like video game industry parties. And so they just sort of fill them with weird stuff. And yeah, oftentimes there's just regular celebrities,

like a reality star or something. But often they'll just be impersonators just kind of walking around to kind of bring energy to the party. Otherwise, it's just like little circles of friends fucking getting tore up. And and so it'll be like an Ace Ventura or, you know, an Albert Einstein, whatever the fuck. I don't know. No Humphrey Bogart's that I've ever run into. But they're really strange because they're they're very engaging,

like by the that that's what they're supposed to do. But what do you talk to them about? You're like, oh, hi, I loved you in this movie. But like what we're pretending you're this fucking guy. We're supposed to pretend you're really Ace Ventura. You have to ask him like pet case questions that like to to humor him. Is it your job to humor him? Is that like, what did you do? Yeah, he like a bucking in Palace Garden.

Am I trying to break you? Am I trying to say? Get you to not talk like Ace Ventura? These are the questions that would utterly paralyze me and cause me to leave the party the very second I saw. Like the very second all of these questions would spin in my head and I would be like, I cannot be in this situation. Can I get out of here? Because you know, there'd be a guy for every one of us

where we're like, we're actually thinking about these questions. There's the guy that's just like, it's fucking Ace Ventura. Do the butthole talk. I know you could do it. I see the movie. That's you. I'd like to ask you some questions. He said he fucking said. Go over to show my wife.

I haven't been to a party with but I've worked with, you know, because of what we do. We've hired some people that can do impersonations and. We'll have a session much like I had with you guys, you know, or I'll just like feed you lines and ask you to do it again. But there's this weird. Well, we nailed it on the first take. Let's. Right. Right.

Let's for example, if you did have to do another take, I would. Yeah, it did not. It did not take a solid hour and it did not hurt my feelings a lot. I definitely didn't ask you to redo the entire thing and then have to delicately word how to say that. It was totally clean, one and done. But yeah, when I work with these guys, you'll you'll get that.

Sometimes they feel like they have to perform, so they'll start doing bits like with you when you're just trying to have casual conversation. And I'm just like, no, man, we don't need that. Like we're we're just trying to do the lines. Like, let's just learn from the background. Well, that was me. So that was just like, we were done after that. I was like, can I stop being Bane now?

All right, cool. I can tell you were telling a story about yourself from the other people's point of view. That wasn't me. All right, let's get through the criteria for this song. OK, this is complete CIA maniac. This is warning you about a man with Bogart's face. Oh, yeah. And what he's going to do.

This is an APG place. That's a weird curveball, too, to say that he's the man that will take your place. It's like so he can change his face to be other people. Right. He's like, no. But there's a body is a skin walker. But if you resemble Bogart at all, he will murder you and become you. Yeah, he's currently wearing Bogart's face. We don't know what it's going to be tomorrow.

And you know what? This is weirdly fucking funky. It kind of rules. I think in 1980, you would. At a high school dance, junior high school dance, hormones are running. You would be way too confused to fuck to this. You would be everybody would look around like, did he say he's the man

with Bogart's face? I kind of know who that is. I think I think I think I think he loves. Junior high school kids. The whole genre about having various celebrities, body parts. I was going to try to meet love's dick. Hey, Betty Davis, there's one. Betty Davis, there you go.

We didn't have this was a genre. Holy shit, what a crazy genre. Celebrity parts, celebrity parts. I haven't have stolen Jeff Fahey. Dibs on Hulk Hogan's arms. Dibs on Hulk Hogan's hair. Yeah, definitely called it already. Yeah, you lose.

Well, there's plenty to go around, my friend. Right, right. Which part in skateboard for my feet. And a barbarian twins fashion check now. Yeah, that's true. Barbarian twins, monstrous body. A boner. I want Barbarian twins bandana collection.

Frankenstein 2022, this is the reboot. And Sufjan Stevens. Yeah, sure. This would be a really confusing one, but he would look confused while performing it, too. He would be like, I don't know who's making me do this. Like this is this is a forced performance, for sure. I don't know if he could hit the irony that.

But the song itself, I think it's got the beat for it. Right. And there's no way I don't win this one. Yeah, there's no question. I mean, I'm even feel I'm even putting it to you as a question. I win this almost. You should be disqualified maybe just for bringing it because there's no way it's losing.

So I was so impressed by it because you fed this to me pretty early on. Like we we started talking about this episode a while ago, I was like, here's my picks. And you were like, here's mine. And I was like, well, holy shit. I'm going to bother you gave me. Yeah, you gave me the chance to to to do better.

And I set a bar, set a bar for you to be there. It's their show. I don't want to, you know, I'm happy to be there and play my part. I don't need to just destroy them by topping whatever could top this song would have just ended the show. Someday we're going to have to like take all of the winners from these categories and each podcast and do a super tournament bracket. Right.

We're all the winners fight. And I I still think man with Boebert's face is going to take faces. Yeah, so the rules be that like you can only win by virtue of like what your lyrics are about. Like. Does he have face stealing powers and he's the man with Boebert's face combat aspect. I have super cop. You have super cop. Yeah, super cop just pulverizes everything.

What else want today? Docking fucking no iron eagle. Docking is just docking. Everybody one except Zach. Yeah. I'm a stranger. Right. I'm a stranger.

I'm a stranger. Right. I'm a stranger. Yeah. Yeah. No, I tell us. Welcome to Hot Dog Warriors. Supreme edition.

Choose your fighter. Three Finger Lui. Aaron Crosston, Adrian H. With powerful charge specials. Squat-style Adrian Aidan Mouette Alpha Scientist Javo

Armando Navar Benjamin Sironin Vim Talzer Brandon Garlock Brian Saylor Brian Whitney Brockway loves the meat-billing This character is unavailable in countries with human decency laws

Zeryl Rev Chase McPherson Chris Brown Curious Blair Dan B Dean Costello, the secret fighter Just hit up-up

Dean Down-down Costello Donald Finney Dr. Awkward Eric Spaulding Phantyshark Jell-O-Ho

Ham Mone From the Savage Realm, Haraka Blades on his hands and feet And one other part Hot part Jaber Al Aidan John Dean John McCammon

John Minkoff From North Dakota, Josh S Not everywhere is the Savage Realm Ken Paisley Ken Em Laziest man on Mars Matt Cortez Matt Riley

Muck Styles Mojoo, the dance fighter Feel the rhythm Or just mash buttons, both work Andy Neil Bailey Neil Shaper Neil Funt

Nick Ralston Nick H Ozzy Olid Patrick Herbst Breannan, who crouches in a corner And sweeps, don't hate Rich Shaslin Timi Lehi

Kostiga Tom Sakula Dommagee Yossarian, or Hold X to select Dark Yossarian And Sarkovsky, the unlockable boss fighter To play Sarkovsky, you must defeat

Every other hot dog warrior using the hot dog trombone peripheral Hot dog trombone, not included, or for sale anyway