The Dogg Zzone by 1900HOTDOG - Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 99, Power Team with Erik Wolpaw

Episode Date: November 9, 2022

Seanbaby invites Brockway and guest Erik Wolpaw to talk about Power Team. He meant the knockoff Captain N cartoon, and not the strong Christian madmen, but Brockway wasn't paying attention... so we do both! Power Teams!

1-900 HOT DOG 1-900 HOT DOG Out of podcast slams with maximum hype Say HOT DOG Podcast Word Yeah When you taste that nitrate power You're in the dog zone for an hour Come on

You know the number 1-900 HOT DOG 1-900 HOT DOG 1-900 HOT DOG 1-900 HOT DOG 1-900 HOT DOG 1-900 HOT DOG Yeah, 9000

Welcome to the Dog Zone 9000 The official zone of 1-900HOTDOG.com The final comedy website Support us on Patreon Or watch Hilarity Die Forever I'm Sean Baby from the internet And I'm joined by the People's Choice Voted Largest Bobby Robert Brockway

Here's a Brockway fact I can tear a phone book in half Using no hands Oh shit I don't have any questions Yeah, don't have any anyway We are joined today by my dear friend An old writing partner

The game writing legend of Psychonauts And portal many others Eric Walpa Welcome to the show Hello boys, how's it going? It's good, it's good I'm not there right now, but I will be there About 10 hours from now

And it's warm, so I'll be getting the final Moe in of the season Cut the drill Awesome So you're fully country, you're like looking forward to nice Moes Yeah You're fighting night creatures Yeah, I'm going to

I'm going to hunt a squirrel And if I catch one, I'm going to eat I'm not joking, I'm going to eat squirrels Well, it was nice knowing you I'm glad these get to be your final words Do you get a lot of pests out there In West Virginia? I grew up on a farm and

Deer very quickly turned from adorable creatures Into like these menaces that would jump in front of the car And get into the garden, eat everything Yeah They're not menaces out there, I'll tell you where they are Menaces is in suburban Cleveland Where I spend the other half of my time They just roam

Around in packs here In the suburbs, because there's no predators There's literally nothing to kill them Except an occasional car And there's all this rich food, because they come And eat everybody's flowers and stuff So they're a much bigger problem When we were looking at the farm in West Virginia

We looked at a bunch of different places And the real estate agents would always be like Oh look, there's a deer, we're like We hate deer, we see them all We're from Cleveland, we hate deer Yes, one without deer Yeah But yeah, they don't make them

In West Virginia without deer But they're a lot more The deer aren't afraid of people in Cleveland They'll just wander around Because they know you're not going to do shit to them But they still have a healthy Respect for how dangerous people are In West Virginia, they will run from you

So I like I feel like if I was a homeless person I would kill and eat a deer I can hand to hand combat Yeah That's an opportunity they have All the time, it's just Goddamn homeless, I don't understand

Deer everywhere, what are you even doing What are you working on these days Uh, nothing I am I have no social media presence I'm not trying to sell anybody Anything, I don't really Have a job, I am

Above the law No, you can't touch me You all are homeless And you can't do shit about it You were at Valve a long time And one of the things I sort of envied About your job there is You had the steady paycheck

And it didn't seem like you had to finish a project For shit, you did a lot of great work there But every time I contracted there It just seemed like everyone had a thousand projects Going at any time And I think that's the best part That's the best part Before you abandon it or have to work really hard

Yeah Eventually stuff Did come out in many cases But yeah, there was a lot of starting And stopping things I do still contract for Valve But I don't have to They probably don't need me to promote them

Alongside my 17 minutes of Homeless material They probably don't want you to There's probably some sort of thing you've signed Without paying attention That's like, we'll not burn the homeless And then name drop, so follow my work on

With Valve Right, but having said that They also just I don't think They need me to promote their stuff Yeah, they're doing okay And it's not like I get a cut of it anyway So

Why would I waste this prime Advertising Guests we've had that isn't like Find me somewhere, so I'm gonna say it Try to find him Just give it a shot Anybody listening to this, see if you can find him It's a challenge

I mean, here's the thing If you like what you hear over the next hour You could send mail to Sean And maybe he'll give you my phone number And you could call me, and if I'm in a good mood I'll give you a whole show for free I'll just talk to you How many acres you got?

That's a lot of acres high then Nobody's ever gonna find you And I'm not giving them Your phone number I would suggest If you find me in Cleveland Because we're not in West Virginia a lot The neighbors are very protective

Of the land And they will shoot you Giving two hints right at the start of the game I think I already mentioned Both those places Yeah, come find me Nice to say or do I mean, don't come kill me

Hey, what's that Story we used to go to in Cleveland That sold all the fucking stickers And like Bee Gees posters and things? Oh, big fun, they went out of business Yeah, that was gonna be my next question I was like, that place has gotta be gone, right? Yeah, there's a similar store

That maybe bought some of their Inventory called I think it's called Applejack's Toys But it's not quite the same experience As big fun was Yeah, that place should go in and it was It was like early 2000s And we just have night writer trading cards

For like 40 cents, it was as if You just traveled through time into An old-timey candy store Yeah, it was awesome It was like an old-timey candy store But for toys, by the end they kind of Maybe just the way The world went, it was

They seemed to get more of a sense Of how much everything was worth Yeah, they had to have been frustrating Because it would have been a Actually good business model Just go in and buy a bunch of shit And then eBay it for four times more Yeah, it's possible that

That had to have happened No room for big fun in this economy Little to no fun It's all we got Yeah, we had good time Sean and I Well, actually he probably Isn't telling you stories all the time

But he's spending a lot of time together In the old days We went swimming in Lake Erie At Chats House, remember that one time And then one perfect turd went floating By as we were Swimming in Lake Erie Yeah, that was a pretty dumb idea

We're kayaking and I'm like, dude, I'm jumping in the water And you're like, this is Cleveland You can't swim in the water And I'm like, you fucking watch me And then it turd, yeah And that's why you have all of those health problems today It's true, I am dying And I can trace it back to that turd

You eat one Cleveland turd And your body's like, you know what, fuck you My god, this man has the worst case of Cleveland Turd disease I've ever seen And we spent the Y2K in Cleveland And That was the day we were walking The whole place was abandoned and we walked outside

And that cloud of birds Came out over the city That we all agreed And we're all like, I've never seen anything like this And their shit was falling like rain I might even have told this story on the podcast before It was so haunting Yeah, it was um, Cleveland downtown

Isn't quite like that anymore But around 2000 Nobody lived in Cleveland So if you went there on a Sunday, nobody was worth it I mean, it was a genuine abandoned city It's um, more people Live downtown now Anyway, yeah

We have some Sean stories That I don't want to hear We've only hung out Three times Yeah, it's not a lot of IRL Oh, are you serious? Yeah Oh, I didn't know that, I figured you guys

No, when Brockway was in Portland, I was in San Francisco And then I moved back to Portland And he left for Connecticut We've just been sort of moving out of each other's way Across America It's like a magnetic repulsion There can't be Two of us too close together

It's just nature doesn't want to allow it It was an explosion It makes sense It would sabotage the fertility rates I do love our romantic chemistry today But I wanted to talk about The power team Oh hell yeah, don't preach the strength for Christ

No, no, no, no, I'm talking about the power team That was like Captain and the Game Master Oh, right Oh, I have a lot of prep That doesn't make a lot of sense I'll work it in You know what, we could talk about them both

I knew going into this We were going to fuck this up So Did you watch episode 11 Of the power team called Deaf Ears Every single day of my life Okay, fantastic Eric, can you watch this too?

I also watched it, yeah High level notes My high level notes Gave me a lot to think about I watched it Literally, it was near Halloween I watched it the same night as this R.T. Farty

A24 horror movie Called Men What a combination This is going to sound like I'm Kidding, but I genuinely Have been thinking a lot more About the power team I think

Men was designed to have me Walk away like I'm thinking about them Not thinking about men at all Coming back to Deaf Ears With some questions And comments So yeah, and I also did

I looked at The Feats of Strength power team too How could you not Look at both immediately I liked the part The part in power team Where the Deaf girl

Starts giving birth to Increasingly Furious Deaf girls Yeah Yeah That was the best part That's the thing Increasingly Fierce giving birth You're just trying too hard

Deaf Ears Had just a lot of stuff going on Right under the surface In a way that wasn't Quite so It was subtext Real subtle Yeah, men I wouldn't call

Men subtle, but Deaf Ears Surprisingly subtle It gets under your skin It stays with you There's so much to think about And obviously talk about But first let me explain the power team to the listeners It's a show that came out in 1990

It was a show that used acclaimed video game characters By the producers of Street Sharks And these are two companies Mostly known for knockoffs and bad licensed games And in itself was both of those things It was a bad knockoff of Captain and the Game Master Which is obviously the perfect idea for a show Which is what if your Nintendo games came to life

And fought crime with you So unfortunately Acclaimed games didn't have the star power Of the Nintendo ones Their biggest get was Bigfoot the monster truck Which was kind of extra weird Because he wasn't anything else He didn't talk or turn into a boy when he got wet

He was just kind of there And could drive himself but also shoot lasers Now I think he could talk Like an old timey Vacuum salesman For some reason I think so The cartoon is made so poorly

That there's no way to tell which character is talking when But there was one that I don't think talked That nobody was talking Aside from Bigfoot So I had to infer A Bigfoot night writer thing Oh That was a question I had

Does Bigfoot talk I thought he didn't Is it Johnny Arcade's talking through a speaker It's impossible to know Because Johnny Arcade is like He can see through Bigfoot I think And he can talk to them directly But at one point I swear he said something

From the point of view perhaps Of the truck Perhaps not Or questions Suck it This is how you fucking make Interesting art By doing it

The other people It's open for debate We're going to get into this Did they do it with this on purpose How do you accidentally make something This good It's an interesting question Maybe

Maybe you do It feels to me Like such a great idea Like they copied Such a great idea that they're like They can't fail too hard They did their best I really think some of these decisions Were so bad

One of the other guys in the team Is a guy from NARC And that was a video game It was about Rocket Launched Drug Enforcement Agents And I looked up their names and they were named MaxForce And Hitman So that's the guy in the show

That must have been the games That they were able to like Because NARC I don't know if you remember NARC is about Two rogue cops Who literally kill everyone As quickly as possible

Also the villain At least in this episode Of Power Team Is also from NARC All three of these bad guys Are from NARC Very central is kids cartoon Is like the famously violent

Like drug game Murder everyone on drugs Kids I looked through and I was kind of rating How good these guys were to have on the team Obviously Bigfoot's crazy handy You want Bigfoot on your team But this guy had the full legal authority

To kill and make arrests So he's also pretty handy to have on a crime fighting team Now he did still have that Rocket Launcher He had everything Their spin on the character was He has just all these gadgets That can sort of do anything Like a rogue cop inspector gadget

Out to just murder everybody That might have committed a crime Yeah, theoretically Except it turns out Until late in the episode The only team member that does anything Is Bigfoot Bigfoot's doing all the heavy lifting

In this thing So there's the Tyrone Black guy from Archrivals Maybe Archrivals And he was the bald one in Archrivals Which was a basketball punching game And his only character trait in that game Was that he was bald so in the show they gave him hair

But he is good at punching and three pointers And I like both those qualities On my crime fighting team So I think he's a pretty good get The thing that stood out to me About the one black guy In this whole cartoon One of the things you learn about him

Is he can't swim His superpowers throwing basketball We have to dissect the can't swim scene Is that We'll get to it for sure I brought that to I think we're all on the same page there I have the actual dialogue

For that scene committed to memory I have it On the sound Okay And so The fact that The things that you know about him Where he can't swim

And he can throw basketball It's mildly problematic I mean like that work But having said that The more I thought about it I was like That's two more things than I know about any of the other characters So he's actually like the most fleshed out Character in the whole show

Just fleshed out with racism Accounts I mean I don't know I don't know who Who knows He was much less violent than he was In the video game Like that was a basketball game

That had a punch button Which was fantastic It was the whole game It was a two on two basketball Be a jam style But you could punch a dude in the face Take the basketball So yeah they took that power from him

I don't think The cartoons just never allowed punching Whether it was Super Friends or G.I. Joe Or any of these kids cartoons There was just no punching And I don't know if that was an agreement They all made independently Or if there was some sort of a cartoon council

That forbade it You are allowed to rocket launch though You could rocket launch all fucking day But when it came time to like Stopping at a bad guy You had to drop like stalactites around them Or you know throw them in a bag In this case it was throwing a basketball

At the Gang They gave up pretty much immediately At that point So are you going to go through the Yeah let's go through the team It's a very interesting team They had the guy from Wizards and Warriors

I guess his name was Kyros They changed him so he wasn't fully armored They gave him a little he-man pervert harness So he's a Mostly nude version of a nameless character Known only by a different outfit Which is fine he had a sword Crime hate stabbing I think this is a great guy

For your team I don't know You guys have any Kyros thoughts He just sort of seems like a generic Like fuck I guess Again he seems like he'd be a great guy For your crime fighting team But he maybe it's just this episode

Was an off episode for him He does nothing It's tough to have like a forgettable barbarian character To go to favorite character Is the barbarian But he was just kind of clocking in Just a barbarian Like at two o'clock on his nine to five

Just had a big lunch Didn't want to do it There is a part I didn't commit it to memory He does reminisce briefly About a water level in his game Yeah he really like established For me that was good world building

Because that sort of lets us know They're from video games They don't come from like other worlds They understand what the deal is Like yeah I'm a video game character So that's why they're so incompetent At solving the case because they don't want to go back And sacrifice all of their

Free will to the controller Essentially he's essentially dying I'm not a back end of this Matrix I don't know that they have free will That's one of my questions are they Johnny arcade slaves You know he might be controlling them somehow

Like he might have A joystick at home or Well they certainly do whatever he says It seems like It's almost worse that They have some amount of free will But they're still Being controlled by Johnny arcades

Even though They now exist in this world There's also the other one His name is Quirk He was a tomato 379th best selling game boy game So huge hit It's about shoving boxes

I actually had this game when I was a kid You shoved boxes, you were a tomato you shoved boxes So I don't know He seems alright If you're going to have a crime fighting team You kind of need a little mascot for him I mentally just remembered him as the sprite spot And I was astonished to learn

That he was not the sprite spot It's just a red spot with glasses And then they're like no no Tomato What the fuck are you even talking about I didn't get tomato even though Now that you mention it Tyrone actually

Buses balls a little bit about the Tomato at one point But the other thing is At one point the tomato guy Is like I'm amazing Because they're going into a sewer And so the idea is He's going to use his maze navigating skills

To help them but that just never comes up again True Plus his game wasn't exactly a maze game It would be like here's five boxes And you've got to sort of plot out how you're going to shove them To get across the room Was it maybe a vegetable joke No I think it had to do with

The way it was The way the line was delivered Made me think that he was They were setting him up to help them out of the maze Anyway none of them did really anything Except for Tyrone threw a basketball at the bad guys At one point And obviously fucking

Bigfoot did a lot of shit Yeah It's really hard to overshadow The monster truck superstar Bigfoot But in many ways congratulations to them To see this fucking sad list of options And still go through with the production of the show So I mean like that's an achievement in itself

Do we Oh shit we got this right spot No look closer No Did we get annoyed No we didn't get annoyed either Do you remember Wizards and Warriors? Kind of That guy but a little bit more naked

Okay I think the intro is funny to me Because it's like the laziest version Of what's just the obvious Clear choice which is like oh the characters Jump out of the TV So it shows Johnny Arcade The cocaine abusing team who hosted

The live parts of the show in his cartoon form And he's just playing video games Fucking arcade stick plugged into a VCR Like they don't want to pay anybody any royalties For anything Then lightning strikes and a character jumps out of the screen And then they just reset that same Same scene for each character

It's I can't imagine doing it in a lazier way It's like the dictionary version of this So it is I'm gonna grant you I'm gonna allow it that it's lazy But I also appreciate that they didn't come up With a 45 second

Backstory about the Wizard They don't even exploit it They jump out of the screen And he doesn't even react My time And isn't gonna tell me some bullshit Backstory about why they're in our world

They just are, they jump out They reuse that thing You'd think by the fifth time He would have been less surprised That one of them jumped out He was super surprised every single time He kind of just drew it so he leaned back Like I guess he'd react in a small way

Yeah, it wasn't over the top Also you just did something And so we can Litigate this now You keep saying Johnny Arcade And that makes sense, but I think his name is Johnny Arcade's plural Is that, I don't know

That's what I think I thought it was just the one But I don't think it matters There's no way that dude survived to 20 years old And they stuffed into that kid Yeah I don't know if you ever watched the live action part of that show But it was clear

They filled him with methamphetamines And just let him loose And he just has this energy that's like I've got to sit in a weird way I've got to say hello in a weird way And it's really uncomfortable to watch Because he's also clearly not very comfortable As a broadcaster

Yeah, he wasn't great They did have a cool move Playing like one With one controller on one machine on one TV And then he does like this This calm central thing Where he spins around in his chair And picks up another

Like he's going from one game to another Like he's some hacker Working on multiple computers It was super 90s I did get a little bit of Tinge and nostalgia from it Like it's unironically Of that era

Sad that it's gone I'm sorry I've been so quiet But you guys didn't think he was cool? Yeah, you just sitting there Pouting like, how am I going to tell these guys I'm cool, I think you already did All my notes, I have a lot of notes About how cool he was

Did you, I mean did, maybe you missed it When he, I mean he did skateboard in Did you see the He skateboarded in That was really cool He skateboarded in and then he also Skateboarded from his desk Over to the couch

So he could watch this This cartoon for six years old That's so cool Big bowl of popcorn Well he needs a cartoon about him I guess if fucking Power I forget what this thing's actually

He had a cartoon version Of himself in the cartoon That his uniform was wearing A leather jacket, but they couldn't He couldn't pull off a leather jacket in real life So he didn't He didn't pull it off in the cartoon It was much cooler in the cartoon

Or at least he tried to be Well there was um Yeah I think there's some, well we'll get to it eventually There's some stuff going on Well this episode is called Deaf Years Because it's about a little deaf girl Who is somehow best friends with Johnny Arcade A much more calm

Version in his animated self Than in his real life version They live in the suburbs together And they sort of have a back to the future thing going Where it's not quite clear how this Agent-appropriate relationship got started Or what's sustaining it Well yeah, so the first episode

Is called Deaf Death Years And I was like oh This can't possibly be It'll turn out Jenny is trying to tell the whole town Warn them about something And so they're metaphorically deaf But you know it turns out

That no it's just her ears are fucked up That's what the title means No I don't remember He has deaf ears I'm a child of this era And I don't remember Everyone hating deaf people Yeah it was a weird choice

And everybody Instantly hates her on site Just like attack They want to attack her on site Yeah it was a group of three bullies Brutally bullying her Just calling her a freak right outside her house For being deaf and nothing else

And I don't know if you guys notice this But one of them is pretty clearly a black albino boy Which is I think a pretty glaring weak spot If you're starting a war being fought Solely by rudely pointing out unusual things About the other person I feel like you're deaf

Well you're an african-american albino That's I think stranger than my thing I mean it's fine If you're starting a fight Where we're pointing out unusual things I just need to make it clear You're weirder than me Yeah

And also He genuinely was an albino I'm actually Not convinced that Jenny is deaf Yeah she's Real able Seems like she hears everything She says she's reading lips

I don't think they cast a deaf actor To play this Because There is no hint of deafness Yeah Beautiful Annunciation Yeah she sounds like She sounds like

She is some Went to finishing school somewhere And she just speaks perfectly So I don't know why they made that decision Maybe it would have been offensive But they could have got I don't know

That seems like a possible But they did call the episode deaf ears Like That seems insensitive Also they're like you're a freak You're deaf you're a freak I feel like without setting that up That's just sort of as the writer assumes

Like yeah people overlaid to this People know that deaf people are freaks She also says At the start I'm not allowed to be around kids at school With me And that's why she runs away from her home situation So it's established it's not just

The children Who think that she must be either destroyed Or contained for being deaf But the school and I guess her parents Well here's the thing though I got a Strong sense that there was no father

In the picture here I got that too I just want to stop for a minute To point out How smoke and hot Jenny's mother is She is A proactive woman And I figured

I mean Johnny Arcades This could be kind of what he's up to In this whole situation That's a good point he might be trying to get with the mom Yeah I mean it would be quite a catch There also might be like a home school situation She also might be really Christian Or something

Did you guys have any deaf friends Or kids or even just like somebody in your school Should we have been calling like a hotline To report this Were they like not allowed Well here's the thing Every disabled person in my school Like everyone kind of took extra care

To like make sure no one fucked with them Cause like we saw cartoons like this And we just sort of pictured this world Like there will come a time when we have to Defend our disabled friend From like these types of bullies And it just of course never happened I called her a freak

But it wasn't She did not stand up for herself at all So I put a little bit of this on Jenny It is kind of hurtful For being a bit of a freak I mean let's face it He got kind of a clever line off

He's like I forget exactly like Read my lips you're a freak Which is a deaf joke It's kind of funny It's a bit nuclear Yeah she could have just Why didn't she say anything back to him

Well she's apparently Spent her whole life In a cage underneath the stairs So she was perhaps ill prepared for a battle of wits It might be But Johnny does kind of resolve it By walking right up to the little kids And making it clear he's about to fuck them up

And then they're just like alright we're out of here Yeah cause he's like And Billy's like I'm sorry And you know it's not sincere But how would she know She doesn't she can't detect sarcasm By reading lips it's ridiculous come on She's capable but like let's

Let's not be silly Actually I didn't consider that That's actually a really good Point she thinks that she Sincerely apologized to her And it's clear to all of us That she did not I don't know if you caught this too Billy is

More insensitive Afterwards he comes back to her And he's like Jenny don't listen to Billy Which is a little horrible She can't listen to Billy He's fucking This is a very good point They're so

Indelicate with their words around But yeah the damage is done Deaf Jenny runs away She's like fuck this whole town Fuck my mom She just runs away The first thing she runs into Is the bad guys from NARC

Mr. Big and his two henchmen The famously violent video game About killing drug cartels So she reads their lips while they're talking about the criminal plan But here's the thing One of them is eating That's like his thing he's constantly eating The other one's constantly chomping on a cigar

It's night she's a block away So they're probably fine right I don't think she actually sees their lips In a clear, coherent way They of course have no way of knowing this So they're like hey that girl saw us Let's split up and hunter But the guy who eats too much smells tacos

And he leaves so that's how she gets away The eating thing will come up later It's more of a superpower than a weakness It didn't go well for him here But later it pays off a lot I thought that was pretty good Because you're like this guy's a useless idiot But it turns out he is not

But speaking of that Contemplating why Jenny has to stay inside all the time Let's face it the bullying she has to deal with Isn't really that bad Any of us could have fucking Yeah we both But here's the thing She leaves the house with her tiny little suitcase

By the way she's not a real good judge Of how much clothing you need to pack To run away for the rest of your life But within five minutes of leaving the house She's on the run from the mob And then she falls into a river So it's kind of an invisible Like maybe that's why she doesn't get to go out of the house

There's Everything falls apart very quickly There's a minute later She falls into a river and it's a weird moment Where you're like why would being deaf Make her fall in a river Like I don't understand You don't need to fall in a river being an idiot

And they cut to another kid later And they're like looking for it They cut to another kid and he's like Well she always goes to the river when she's upset The fucking river was there Yeah she knows how to Pea near the river So the whole

Part I was saying how much I liked this before But now we're talking about it And I'm getting angry about this Well the mom has figured out Jenny's gone So instead of calling the police She calls her older friend Johnny Arcade

And he calls the power team And then quietly removes himself from the cartoon for the most part I think he's not really part of The power team he basically sits at home And watches them do things Through two unknown means At first I thought it might have been a mistake

In the script like sometimes He would say something I'm like how the fuck did What he's back in his house So I thought The writer forgot he wasn't there and like Wrote a line for him in the screenplay and then the animators Just drew the mistake but Whatever I don't know

Maybe Bigfoot has a camera on it But they don't want to show him looking at A camera feed of What Bigfoot is seeing It has to be that Or some sort of a magic Connection telepathic connect Doesn't fucking matter it's a cartoon

They have a missile fight and a laser fight In the middle of the neighborhood They basically find the bad guys instantly And Mr. Big just pulls Rockets out of his jacket Like that's his thing His pockets Fantastic power

Bigfoot does a hydraulic stretch To dodge the missiles And Also fires laser From his headlights Which is another Bigfoot power I don't recall from watching The monster truck rallies

I guess I wasn't paying close attention To the deep lore Of the truck Yeah I don't remember exactly when it happens But Johnny Arcade slash Arcades Does seem like he's barking commands at At

Yeah he tells them to dodge the rockets as they're coming in Yeah I guess I don't know if that's If that makes it happen or that's just a suggestion Is he the player in the game? Yeah I also just want to point out

Because I forgot to mention it earlier Mr. Big Is way more deformed than He's wildly deformed He's horrifically Deformed But he's managed to get on with his life Like he's kind of

He's got two henchmen I would like to just introduce The idea here That all three of the villains Mr. Big and his two henchmen Are all wildly deformed One of them we've established Will run towards

The smell of tacos regardless of the scenario I don't think that's like A mafia goon thing Maybe some sort of Brain damage issue Right I think it's related Yeah That guy's got

A mental problem Probably something physically wrong I don't think that You've established These villains as a force That we need the power team to defeat A monster truck that shoots lasers And a brutal

Merciless cop Like A single black man doing his best And a tomato And a barbarian I think you need almost any one of those things To defeat these just I feel like if Jenny wasn't a total piece of shit

She could probably handle these guys Jenny Jenny is A passive So I thought Well I guess we'll eventually get to it I thought Jenny would do something Her deafness would somehow pay off

Somehow but it doesn't There's no arc for Jenny I do want to talk about this fight Because they drop a banana sign onto the bad guy It's like a giant wooden billboard And they're trapped They're like oh shit we're stuck in a banana And then Mr. Big remembers

That he has a henchman that eats everything Look Joe Bananas Don't you want to eat them Yeah thanks boss And then he eats it Bananas is my favorite Now let's get out of here

So he can't taste the food he's eating Or identify texture He just ate a wooden billboard He's brain damaged He's definitely has had some sort of tractor accident As a child Being exploited by this small Deformed man

Again this is way worse Than being deaf All the time and yet gets no pleasure Out of food because he can't taste it And he can't appreciate texture Can't identify it This might be the point of the episode For Jenny to go out in the world

And encounter all of these people That actually have it quite a bit worse than her And are still dealing with the world Like on its level That's no excuse to be Spending all of her time in the box under the stairs That's no bullshit If that was intentional that's really good art

So this is the type of thing I think about But it doesn't seem like She learns a lesson from it But maybe that's the point Is that That She is incapable

I don't know why maybe because she's deaf I guess that would be That lesson to take away too Yeah I think this I think this show Starts off Saying I think it starts off with the thesis That like

Deaf people must be contained or destroyed And they can't get out And everybody knows that And I was I guess I was on board with that Being something we must have thought in the 90s Even though I don't recall it But I think the show

Goes through and ends With the lesson being So you see Deaf people should be contained or destroyed Because she goes back She goes back in the box Yeah no she Happily

Walks back into the box Like all of this was to teach her You see you were safe in the box Yeah Deaf people Should not be out in the world Even though everybody else out in the world Is fucking

Disfigured or has some massive problem It pales in comparison To your handicap She's not a tomato for instance Right Literally every other person In this except for her mom Who we don't understand

What her problem is She's single I guess Raising a kid In 1990 they considered that a disability The other thing That we should consider is It sounds like Johnny Arcades is Canadian So it's possible this whole thing

Takes place in Canada Which is a very different scenario Deaf people wise I think Could have been a very different situation Because they had work camps for them In 1990 Canada Canada was a real fucking Shit hole for deaf people

So A thing that I really like In the show is the bad guys left in a car But all the good guys had already jumped At a big foot and they just make no effort To go after them and this happens So many more times in the show when the bad guys Just leave and the good guys are like

No reason to pursue them And so anyway This is frustrating As a viewer It felt very much like watching an evil Pro wrestler cheat over and over and over But anyway The little girls

We mentioned she falls into a drainage pipe And Then it cuts to the next day Where Johnny Arcade goes to the bullies That were being mean to her that made her run away And they know exactly where she likes to hang out And just through insane blind luck

It's the same watery grave she just fell into So now that's our first commercial break And if you guys watched the link I sent you it had some pretty great commercials And I actually took a clip from one of them That was it Red Wing Technical College is now Enrolling students in accordion

And concertina repair In only nine months You can learn the techniques of tuning Repairing, building, and playing Classes begin November 28 Financial aid is still available So many questions It's unbelievable

That in your 90s Accordion repair college was a thing And You don't think that's got to be a grift, right? It couldn't have been in high demand That has to have been salesmanship But they still bought the time Well, so this is my other question

So there's a bar There's also an ad for bartending college And then there's one for accordion repair college So clearly they're not trying to sell this To eight-year-olds So they bought airtime On the fucking power team Assuming that

Unemployed losers Were at home Too lazy to like change the channel To the prices right or something So that they could sell Accordion repair college To the people watching And only

Accordion and concertina repair This wasn't like so many of the commercials Back then which were like You're an unemployed piece of shit Come to our college learn air conditioning VCR repair Learn how to fucking juggle Business management or an account

There was a lot of like But they were like no Accordions We need the whole industry needs It's going to shit We need your fucking help There aren't enough people Like accordion salesmen and repair people

Are dying faster than we can train them You need to step into this This whole college is apparently just for that Red Wing technical college It was astounding It's like there's a market for it In just the one man I think in a second or a third way to Al Yankovic

It's all going to be worth it Maybe I got to think If there was one accordion repairman For the entire Midwest region Like Wisconsin, Minnesota Like he could handle everything That's enough Maybe two they could kind of like have a rivalry

That'd be fun I was kind of hoping that by the end It would turn out that power team Is just sponsored by accordion repair college And then You just smash cut the From fifth grade straight to accordion college And she's graduating valedictorian

This is why the deaf girl is portrayed As something to be feared and reviled She can't understand the sponsor She can't tune in accordion for shit Oh, right Oh, because she's deaf And it was like an affirmative action Higher

And so she graduates valedictorian By her first accordion where she can't hear the accordion It just sucks And she's homeless again Like in five minutes falls into a real I don't like this sketch comedy show I have some notes We come back

And she's found a patch of dry sewer To stand on And she's just wandering in random directions In this small town's enormous sewer system Like this fucking There's like a minotaur labyrinth Underneath the frozen yogurt strip mall Mr. Big and his henchmen

They find her scarf on a sewage grate And they're like, hey, we recognize that scarf That's from that little girl And then the power team drives right up And they also recognize the scarf So Jeff Jenny's red scarf Is the talk of the town, guys She drops that anywhere

And everyone just gathers around it This is Jenny's scarf I was telling her how fucking good She looks at this, my god Red, no less Jenny Yeah, so they What they find her, or don't wait

Sean, you tell me what happens Next, the power team Heads into the sewer Far on the tail of Mr. Big They get in their way before them And then here's where we get a lot of good character development I actually pulled the plug Oh, here we go

Just so we don't have to go swimming That's all I'm worried about I thought you couldn't swim Once in my game world I fought a great battle in the water level Against a six-headed serpent That skewed fire from its mouth Yeah, come on

Cure us The mighty warrior never loses his battles Aw, man Then he goes again Shhh, but look I hear voices Wow, I didn't... The first time around I didn't hear any of the rest of that exchange

Where he was talking about his battles I just heard him turn to the black character And go, I thought you couldn't swim And I thought, oh, fuck And then the one black character said I can't, and I was like, aww, shit Yeah, this is bad It's a suspicious

They dedicated full three lines of dialogue To make it clear, it was very important To this writer's understanding of the character And doesn't come up later Beyond that, though Okay, so let's put that aside For a minute The racism

Yeah, put it aside It's structured like that back and forth Is some sort of Oscar-wild level word play But it's literally the one guy saying I can't swim And the other guy says, I thought you couldn't swim And Tyrone says, that's why I hope we don't have to swim Right

It's just He really wanted to hammer it home At any cost Even at the cost of the pacing The dialogue, it doesn't fucking matter The only thing I know about this character Is that he's black Again, I'm the writer here

The racist 90s video game cartoon writer Sure The only thing I know about him is The black stereotypes they told me here in rural Canada Yeah He can't, yeah I can't swim I thought you couldn't swim, I can't swim

It's just, that's the dialogue It's got the tat-ta-ta The rhythm of it I punched it, I actually made it way better You don't Man, if there's like a wiki If there's like a wiki for these characters I bet that's the one fact

Underneath Tyrone Like it might be the only time They've given him Fucking world-class athlete They can't swim because he's You know, I don't want to say it But Although, again, I'm going to go

I'm going to reiterate I don't know about any of those other guys, really Other than the very obvious things Of one guy's a tomato I actually know some things that aren't immediately obvious About Tyrone He can't swim, and he's good At basketball

If it wasn't such a common racial stereotype It'd be like Mr. T how he really loves milk He hates to get on a plane These little things make the character come alive In your mind Anyway The guy from Narc has like a fish finder And he pulls out

They can track a human man through sewer walls Yeah So this is going to be a pretty easy hunt It's not like they're going to be like Oh, how are we going to find these guys It's like, well, it is a Canadian Suburbian sewer and you have This gadget that just tells you where everything is

So I think you'll be okay So there's not a lot of stakes No, are they looking for Mr. Big Or are they looking for Jenny Or are they looking for both of them Jenny, they walk past her And then she notices them and runs to them And that's how this episode is solved

Actually, no Brockway, I hate to Correct you They walk past her And she yells for them And they hear her yelling And then come back Think about it, if the roles were reversed

And it was deaf Jenny looking for the power team They would have died In the sewer Being deaf is a massive handicap The only reason That she was saved is because Of the power of hearing Another

I really think The ultimate lesson this was trying To teach us was that she was wrong For trying to leave her contained scenario I just There's no other way to take it She was safe In her house with her mother

And it was dangerous Dangerous outside for Jenny But I do like that That here she is in the shadows Of the sewer And she's just given up Someone find me That's literally the line

And she can't figure out how to exit I guess the sewer has no exits And here comes a tomato, a nude man Every black stereotype And a freelance drug murderer And she's like, hey, what's up guys I'm glad you're here This is one of those things in cartoons

Where you never are quite sure if Are these people okay with the tomato Walking among them? Like, do they know the power team exists? Are they on the news? I mean, she does have What appears to be a close relationship With Johnny, so possible

She's aware of this But yeah, it's a good larger question Because Mr. Big I'm assuming jumped out Of a video game too, maybe he didn't Clearly doesn't look human Yeah, I think he jumped out of Narc But speaking of, they jump out here

They're like, oh hi, we're here too And the Narc guy shoots them With light that summons bats Hold on, that's completely crazy In like four directions There are sewer bats Which, okay maybe And light summons them

I don't think so I think it does eventually Because the light will summon a bug When the bugs get there It's not something that happens And you have a sewer bat summoning rocket Is how you have immediately Solved this situation

And there are just no questions Asked by anybody on any side They're like, yep, that sucks I knew we had that, I shouldn't have done this Now the good guys run away But they do have to protect Jenny So they probably don't want her in the middle of a missile fight That's fair

The very next scene they run into each other With no real explanation It's just every time they need to arrive At a place they do They have a fight at a second location And Mr. Big throws some missiles The Narc guy has a retractable shield Like a missile proof shield

They can just pull out And they all kind of get a chance to use their powers here The big guy that eats stuff He picks up a cannon, he's going to squash him with it But Quirk, the box shoving tomato He jumps into the sky and turns into A seeking ball missile Hits him in the dick, drops the cannon on his own head

It's awesome, I love it Then the other henchman Who hasn't done anything, I don't even know what he can do Tyrone throws a basketball at him With a classic intentional miss fake out And the guy's like, aha, you missed Boom, bounces off the wall, hits him in the back of the head And Quirk goes

Great rebound, Tyrone And gives him a high five Kind of a rebound, it's close Okay, little buddy Teamwork, my man Which again, you're close You're kind of on the right track We're on the same team and we both did worse

Yes I didn't understand what the teamwork was either But I do like that it seems like the tomato And Tyrone have a bond That the other guys don't have Maybe It does seem like everyone else is getting to know each other constantly

The Narc guy hardly talks And Kyros is just like A super cool guy for my video game And they're like, dude, none of us have this vibe Like, you're the only one who seems to know That you're from a video game It's fucking weird, man You know what, I think I'm coming around

To Eric's point They're telling me he couldn't swim was a good idea So it's the, they came in the fucking tomato Are the only ones I care about They're like the only ones with any sort of personality And they did one thing each This episode just now, like at the end Maybe that was it

Maybe that was the right move Who do I want to see more of I want to see more of Tyrone in the tomato So again, you know They did a good job I'm done, I don't need any more Jenny I don't need any more Johnny Arcades Oh, that's good

That's good that you don't need any more because she goes back To her fucking house to disappear from society forever She says like, yeah, I shouldn't have done any of that I should never have left And appeared in society And let people see me This was all a mistake Goodbye forever

It is one of the rare Shows Or pieces of fiction ever written Where the bully gets no comeuppance Because he was right Yeah, he was right I mean, look, it's the It's the ugly truth

Of actual life Which is, yes, some people are bullied Because they're eccentric, gentle souls But a lot of kids are bullied Because they're aggressively annoying weirdos And maybe that with Jenny Yeah Billy was not completely wrong

With what he was trying to do Yeah, I definitely do not like Jenny I feel like She got what she deserved I feel like someone should have thrown her in the fucking wet trash I'm going to go out on a limb and be the guy That says maybe it's wrong To contain or destroy deaf children

Well, it all ended up okay They get back to her house And her mom Who just recovered a runaway daughter From 24 hours in the sewer Leaves her with the magic older boy Who knows a tomato And she's like, take all the time you need

You too, I'm going to go wait in the car And so Jenny promises To never run away again And they're kind of wrapping up the episode Unmentioned that she's still being hunted By the murderers They still think she knows about Some sort of a crime

I did take a clip here at the end Real quick No charge I just thought that was Really fucking weird Do they normally charge? And if so, for what? So that was like this crazy twist ending

I'm like does the power team Normally charge people? Is this a money making operation? Again, don't know It feels like that would be the ethics Of a claim Like a claim was very much They would sell a pile of shit

To a 10 year old and did many times To me at least Yeah, well okay So the one thing, one correction I think I'm going to make Is that maybe Mr. Big in his gang Are not after Jenny anymore Because their plan has already been foiled

Which was, remember they were going to steal Oh they were going to take over that From the armory I mean they could do it again I guess, but that Their plan has been blown Everybody knows that that's what they're going to do now One guy hitting the

Head of the basketball, the other one got hitting the dick with the tomato The whole plan fell apart And also good luck Finding her as she has just agreed To disappear from society forever Yeah, she's She's not going to leave the house She, so

Again, the thing I'll say Is if they make a men too I'm probably not going to watch it But I genuinely am probably Going to track down another power That's better art, yeah What it's like It's controversial, I don't agree with what it said

About the destruction of deaf children But it said something Yeah, it did say it It had a point of view for sure An interesting View Of what maybe people thought I mean, I was alive in the 90s

I just don't remember what we all thought About deaf people, but This could be an accurate representation of that It was a hateful time, a dangerous time I think Johnny Arcade sums it up best When he takes us out of the episode It cuts out to live action Johnny Arcade

And he goes, oh man, what can I say Except Time for a preview, he has nothing to say about it He has nothing to say It's like, that one's pretty fucked up Oh man, what can I say Let's get to the previews I turned it off, so

Shit, I missed that Yeah, I didn't watch all the live action stuff It rewards a rewatch Yeah I mean, I did, I watched it The second time I was scrubbing to my favorite parts But I did watch it twice And

Yeah, I'm glad I appreciate that you guys recommended it To me I'm happy that I watched it Nice Oftentimes we'll have people in the show And watch something and it's completely awful But not in a way they enjoy

And then everyone hates me Definitely so It's hard for me to imagine Somebody watching this And paying attention And coming away with It makes you think, it does make you think And maybe it makes you think because it's incompetent

But I don't know It makes you think the wrong thoughts, but those still count Yeah I like Yeah, it's challenging I don't want everything to just Reinforce my preconceived notions Of deaf people and their value to society

I would like to be challenged on that I don't know You know what? It wasn't going to a good place Let's talk about the other power team Oh, hell yeah I feel insane having to say this But if you don't know what power team

The alternate power team is They were bodybuilders And just, I want to say just rough and ready Madmen for Christ They went to God, it wasn't even just schools They would just show up in your town And ruin your town's week

And just, we're here now We're in the fucking town, we're in the Elks Lodge And I'm going to tear A bunch of license plates in half with my bare hands And I'm going to blow up a hot water bottle Until it explodes and I'm going to And men are going to try to rip my hands apart But I won't let them

And it's just General rough housing madness that I love And then at the end they'd stop and be like And this was all for Christ And then they would talk to you about how Jesus Gave them The ability to destroy Almost anything with their bodies

Which I don't recall those miracles From the Bible, I don't recall Jesus Ripping license plates in half With his hands and Distributing them to the masses Instead of food Sure, he did Here's how about license plates

Which is similar to blowing up a giant balloon Till it falls, I mean they're both Feets of strength It's all metaphors He did die on the cross Feeling if it was the power team They would have flexed and broken the cross And then ran around

Yeah, that cross, they would have picked up that cross And then they would have Broken it over their knee And then they would have taken the next one And broken it slightly slower over their knee That's kind of what I liked about the power team Is that they've been doing the same act For like 40 or 50 years

And so like they tear a phone book in half And I sort of remember When I was a child they would be like This phone book is so hard to tear in half And they'd like set it up and be like Dude, no one's ever fucking done this And they'd tear the phone book in half and you're like That's amazing, I just learned how hard those are

To tear in half and you did it But like they've been doing it for so long That everyone going there knows That they're gonna tear these phone books in half So they have to tear like 40 or 50 phone books in half They just rip, rip, rip, rip Yeah, at one point they turned it into a race between like two guys But it was like a decathlon to see who can rip

Phone books, bend bars, tear license plates And like jumping down, scaffolding Out of each other, it was just A wildly destructive, ill-advised time And I loved it I watched a bunch of these short videos And my favorite one ended With one of the power team like running in slow motion

Getting high fives from this crowd Like all the way around this Clearly just like I said Like an Elks Lodge or a community center Getting all these high fives around the perimeter And then at the very end Like it goes into even slower motion First through like eight icebox

I saw that one That was genuinely Inspiring Got me pumped up, I thought Here's the thing though, so we're like Oh, this is goofy, this is silly But I'm I read the comments of that video

And it's just person after person Being this was the greatest, they came to my town This was the greatest thing that happened to me when I was a kid So these guys were Or are on to something I'm going to go out on a limb here And say that of the three of us I'm the only one that attends church regularly

Because my wife is a Catholic And so for our son I show up I go to Mass, I'm not a Catholic But I've become very good A good critic of Homilies, which is the part where The priest kind of goes off book During the Mass and kind of does

And the thing is there's usually Two minutes of Here's some moral And then it's padded out with like 13 minutes Just I guess because you You just got to pad it out And some priests are good at it Some priests aren't that great at it

This is brilliant, like Get your two minutes, get your very simple But profound message Out and then do something That's fucking engaging Dive head first through eight ice blocks If you're going to preach a sermon at me You should destroy something

With your body or have your body Be destroyed immediately Exactly If the priest, next week's Mass Was like we're called to live our faith Even though the world often Is in opposition to it And it's hard, but you know what else is hard

Breaking a three foot pile of flaming bricks With your head and he did it It would be the greatest church going experience In my life, so I don't know if this guy still exists But Some of these videos are very recent So yeah, oh are they? Because the one, the thing I wouldn't

Want to go see It seems like the blowing up The balloon till it Bursts would be anxiety producing For everybody That's a fetish, right? We've agreed that that's We've all agreed as a society that this is now a fetish

But Feels like it could also do the most Physical trauma to the performer It feels like that would really be bad for your lungs And you probably get whipped in the face Rubber balloons a lot I'd much rather break a baseball bat over my leg Than blow up a hot water boat any day

It's such an old timey thing that I have no preconception Of how difficult that is to do So it just looks like you're blowing up a balloon So you're destroying yourself For the least spectacle Like it's the worst It's the worst thing to do The other stuff is like

You're just cheering, but that one you're just scared Because the thing's gonna burst And you don't know when and it's gonna be really loud And it just seems bad But like, so the other thing they do Is they bend rebar with their teeth Seems like that's pretty cool Sure

Everything they do seems pretty cool They do some cool shit, they do some red shit Nobody's debating that And what was best was this was all This wasn't like, God, now we're prepared for it You go watch a YouTube video, you can go watch Like what's power team you go on YouTube And watch the YouTube videos, it's a fine experience

But in their heyday Which was like mid-80s When they were doing this, nobody had any fucking clue They didn't have any like TV specials for a long time They would just show up in your town And you'd be like, oh I gotta go to church today And you go to your church and then they're like

What the fuck is going on These mad men are destroying the entire church For God, I didn't realize Religion was like this Yeah, this is um I mean, I think faith formation in kids Is tough and these guys cracked it They fully cracked it

Agreed Yeah, this is great for kids And you're saying there's still I genuinely had no idea these people existed Until you mailed me about it I feel like some of these videos I found Are at least in late 2010s Well, I have the backstory on that

But I just, real quick You're completely correct, Eric My wife had seen them like As one of these ambush shows not knowing who they were They showed up to like her town community center And her and her friends from like Her karate class went to see this And were just like

Wow, all of these strong men They kind of saved it, the religious Stuff for the end And so they did all these insane fucking moves Just bursting through things with their forearms And lighting shit on fire and cracking it with their heads And she was just like Yes, whatever this is

I want to run away from home and do this This is amazing And at the end they're like, now who wants to come up here And she was like, hell yeah Like I'm already like We believe in Christ, I want to go do that And then her friends had to be like, no no no Sit down, don't go up there

Because she didn't realize that like There are different kinds of people that believe in Christ So she was born Catholic And they were trying to convert her to Christianity And she was like, hell yeah So there was a very real danger that she could have come home And been like, I converted religions Thanks to the strong men at school

And told her parents that Definitely not I mean there's some form of Protestant But Exciting Catholics could learn something from this The power team came to my town When I was in middle school

And they came to my school And they changed their message from God To be like anti-drug They weren't allowed to talk about God in the school once Right And so they all had stories about how they Recovered drug addicts And here's why you don't do drugs

And one of the things I remember Is one of them did a feat of strength Where he put two girls on like a bench And lifted the bench And some guy went into the crowd And he picked two girls And I remember he picked two girls that like Worked very hard like

Dolling up their hair and putting on their makeup But when they He brought them on stage The other guy like went out and found his own two girls And put them on the bench And as they were asked to leave The second guy just didn't think The first set of girls were pretty enough

And like they had some sort of an on-stage rival Like I'm gonna go find some hot girls And the guy's like you didn't find hot girls I'm gonna go find some hot girls And like that played out silently in front of The entire middle school And so that's just some fun Drop that into the fucking power team

And those were middle school girls Yeah, so they were like 12 or 13 I guess Yeah, it's not alright at all Sure, but it was very clear like What had happened, you're like from a distance Or with bad eyesight, you'd look at these first two girls And say like those must be mega babes

You know whatever, like they're not Jenny, but they weren't tanks Well I was a little more on board With the power team before this I'm getting a little You never know They did, I have the whole like power team

Lore here Eventually make one special A VHS special That was One of the crazier things I've ever seen In the sense That it was kind of not the power team Like they somehow

Backgrounded all the feats of strength And would only show them in like Heavily filtered music videos So they'd show In like a guy would stand up there And preach to you about the trials That he's been through and everything And that's where we're going to do this awesome stunt

For Christ and then they'd show this heavily edited Like filtered, quick cut You can't really see what's going on Thing of like a guy maybe breaking some ice A guy like certainly a bad is being broken And they did that every time They did that like 15 times for the special And never once showed like

The actual feat of strength all the way through Which was such a crazy understanding Of like the value That they bring with this Show, like they did not Had no idea they thought all This strongman stuff they did was just like Completely incidental and nobody wanted to see that

So that makes me Yeah, that does make me re-evaluate That they kind of knew what they were doing And were geniuses I guess maybe they were Yeah, you clearly need a balance Of both of those things I mean for the, honestly you could just have the feats of strength

But it would be a different message Yeah, like in school they, like Sean was saying They weren't allowed to bring their religious stuff to school So they would pick something else They would pick their big ones They picked were drugs, anti-drugs Suicide and divorce Was another one they would come in

And like do all of these stunts to teach Middle school children Not to get divorces eventually This is how your parents' marriage was torn apart Yeah, I mean those are all Fine messages I guess, I mean divorce Well the guy that started it, John Jacobs The televangelist primarily

And kind of a strong guy second He eventually would get a very Public and brutal divorce From his wife And he was Surrounded by such Dumb, innocent God bless them Believers that this destroyed

The power team That he got a divorce like Almost everybody was just like, no You're done, we're out and it splintered The power team into two maybe three Power teams that Would like go to war Like wrestlers

And try to sabotage each other's shows And We're the pro-divorce power team Yeah basically We're the ones that are with John Jacobs Who thinks it's okay now to divorce And we're the ones that are gonna come to your school And tell your 13 year old

Do not get a divorce And don't let your parents, it's up to you To stop your parents from getting a divorce Dude those two girls had to Walk back to their seats after doing nothing On stage, they had to know Within seconds they're like, oh It's cause we're not pretty enough, I'm just

I just want to remind everyone that's who we're dealing with Yeah they were Because let's face it They're still just men, they're just men They're not divine Strong men Yeah, you're confusing how Strong they are Sean with the divine

They're moral strengths Men, mortal men And that's what they were going for So I mean that's kudos to them Their like messaging was insane all the way Through like the VHS that they do It starts out with a really ominous Narrator going, the kingdom of heaven

Suffered violence And the violent ticket by force And then the power team logo Comes up and it goes power team So like the, and that's it The power team Stole heaven, invaded heaven Like that's the implication

They don't say the devil stole it They said the kingdom of heaven suffered violence And the violent ticket by force Dot dot dot power team I genuinely don't follow it I don't know what that means Other than the power team Have destroyed heaven with violent force

Yeah, it sounds like They beat the shit out of heaven I gotta think that It was just bad writing It is just bad writing and throughout Like he opens, John Jacobs is the speaker And he opens it by saying like In no uncertain terms, we are here

In Tulsa to wage war on the devil And that's like great, great messaging Strong power team messaging And then he goes on to explain That Satan called an emergency Strategy meeting in hell And then a demon popped up and said Let's persuade the people to kill

Christ on a cross And so they put posters up in hell To win the devils over to kill in Christ On the cross and that's what happened to Christ That's too many details That's not right It's also in perfect detail That's an odd

Yeah, I don't know why they're rewriting The new test It's He tries to tie all of this Into like, in a way The times I've seen Power team videos, I've never seen them in person And talking to my wife

They come there and they do these feats of strength And then it seems like at the end They introduce religious stuff and are like We are strong Through the strength of God and all of that And we had a tough time In our lives and this got us through And here it's up to him to try to tie

Every stunt to Christianity And so at one point The devil's rule is up He has put a suicide Spirit, an occult spirit, a pervert Spirit inside this nation America needs to enlist

In a war to declare the devil is not Going to steal this generation And as I snap these bats, you've got to believe That God is going to touch your life Well That is, they didn't even try To tie that together I don't think you made that

Not doing drugs, that's a home run And then you snap a bat Fucking easy And as they snap the bats He stops to make the sign of the cross with it And he does it every single time And at the end He goes

I got good news people If you think our arms are big You should see God's arms I bet they're so huge They're big But God isn't going to do feats of strength for you So you can't

God just I think it depends on the era of God It seems like Old Testament Yeah, but That was an old Yeah, there was a time when God would come down And just be like, look at how fucking yoked I am Watch me lift this tire

Do you not Put three sets of handcuffs on me And step the fuck back So Wow, this has been The more we talked about Power team the cartoon The more I appreciated it

I went in with our team And Christian Feats of strength troop Really high on them But the more Brockway has told me about them I've gone the other direction On them I don't know that

I'm kind of sad about them now You do make a great first impression But like all Christians The more you scratch at it You're like, oh I do want to just a couple other things He How badly their leader misunderstands

What they are there to do Is that in this His pattern For his evangelizing is so bad That he manages to lose a church crowd Like he starts having people repeat after him But he starts making the sentences Longer and longer until nobody can remember all of them

And they lose energy So that by the time In this mega church that is packed just to see this He screams Jesus Christ is the Lord And only like a quarter of the crowd Talks along with them He lost a crowd to see this

Specifically so bad that they wouldn't say Jesus Christ is the Lord Along with them I can't imagine more than that They were the perfect Christian showmen But I just Had some selective YouTube videos That made me think that

Turns out not the UK's I think their satellite shows Were just go out there Just mall a town Go out there and just steamroll a whole town And be like Thank Christ for this As the place burns to the ground

And then everybody's so in awe that they're like Yeah hell yeah But then they got like an hour long special To really spread their message and then they found out They didn't really have a message Like John Jacobs comes out and one of his Very first things he says like the problems That they need to address with this

Is that when they do these shows in their high schools The kids will often come up to them And one girl came up and she showed him What looked like razor wounds all over her body And she said I hurt so much I tried to erase myself And what I found out was that she had taken

A school eraser and rubbed it all over her body And I've gotten five This is not a true story And I've gotten five letters this month alone From children who tried to erase themselves And so I don't think any of this is a true story So he dedicates a trick

To stopping children from Erasing themselves with school erasers Like I don't And what's the trick? It's a confusing music video I don't know It's a confusing music video Of a guy that like maybe explodes some ice

With a head or something It's wild And just Insistent and fucking crazy He keeps dropping Studies for things that absolutely have not happened Like he says over 90% Of pro athletes get divorced

After they retire Who can stop this pain? I don't know how to prevent that Are we here to prevent that? The divorce of professional athletes? Is that what this is? Let me just rip these handcuffs in half That ought to do it

You're welcome Tom Brady He tells two stories that are both So equally unhinged This is how the show ends He says Woodstock was not the biggest Rock concert I was disappointed with Woodstock Because in the bible there was a bigger rock concert

And they had real rock bands in those days Which I don't think so And then he tells a story about How a bunch of people wouldn't bow to a king So he threw them in a furnace And then when he looked in the furnace He saw people and the fourth man burning Was Jesus

What the fuck? I don't understand So the lesson is you don't burn a man Because That's how you summon Jesus Jesus will sometimes get summoned by people And if he gets summoned while they're in an oven Then is that

I don't know It's the footprints on the beach story But with burning Jesus And his into this Is that Woodstock isn't the biggest rock concert When there was four men in the oven That's when you were burning me That's how that

Calendars No, I think I have that wrong Yeah, just again None of this actually comes up on a typical week At church Oh it doesn't, they don't teach that story In church? Like I was saying though

I ripped a phone book in half I would welcome that I'm gonna rip this Bible in half with my bare hand Wait, no, no Put this Bible back together Put my bare hands Did your wife keep up with her training Brockway? Can she tear a phone book in half?

No, I think she went the other direction Like the last She's the girl in the last Story John Jacob sells Where he says He says he went to a high school And said, I know how to drain All the power out of you

And you think it's like Oh, this is getting sexy I'll drain all the power out of the power team And she says, if you sit in that chair And raise your arms I'm gonna pronounce a saying over you John Jacobs takes a minute and then he says Ladies and gentlemen, I immediately knew

She was a teenage witch The occult is in every high school In America I didn't want to do it myself So I volunteered one of the power teams So he's afraid of the teenage witch And he volunteers one of his boys To sit in the chair

And this witch Starts doing her spell breathing and drawing in His power But what she didn't know Was that John Jacobs was standing behind her whispering I bind this spirit in the name of Jesus And so when she went over To press down his huge arms

She couldn't press them down Because she had been Just magically cock blocked by Jesus Thanks to John Jacobs And what the power team guy did then Was he stood up And he did a standing press That witch right over his head

Just standing pressed a teenage witch Right over his head for Jesus That's a really Fucking insane story I wish that they could have just stuck To feats of strength And kind of like standard Bible parables

And why they had to do this extra It turns out I'm strong because I believed in God That's fine Fighting a witch By whispering a counter spell While your friend sits in a chair It's too much

And then lifting her Like a barbarian brother Snap her head off She's a witch It's your duty as a Christian To tear that witch's head off If you genuinely believe This girl is a witch

Yeah, I'm not really sure Why you're fucking around Why do you have this great strength Why have you been tearing license plates in half If not in training to destroy a Teenage witch Oh, Frogway has summed it up Perfectly

This is literally what they're in training for Is to fucking hook up your chin too Exactly This was your chance Wasted your whole fucking life Wasted God's time In retrospect We should have started with the disappointing power team

And moved on to the Power team It's a good point It did not work out that way A couple of the videos on YouTube Are actually inspiring They're awesome Stop at the one

It runs through the crowd in slow motion Collecting high fives and then uses the power Of the high fives to explode his head Through blocks of ice That's the peak That one is really good Peak of the art form I would say

Normally I'd say it's too long a run You want a good 20-30 feet To get up to maximum speed But those high fives It's the high fives that give him that power So you gotta go all the way around that whole convention Any kind of showman He would have told all those kids lined up

Beforehand I'm going to kill myself My skull is going to cave in The last time we did this He did not collect enough high fives And I lost my brother So I need you all to believe In these high fives with everything you got

Because that's what I'm gonna use That's what I'm gonna channel the energy to my skull And fire myself like a bullet for Christ 100 Frankfort And with maximum chow Say Frankfort podcast Correct

The power is not trapped It's not without Send it to the dog zoo 4 hours Come on You can do it 1,900 Frankfort

1,900 Frankfort 1,900 Frankfort 1,900 1,900 Let me tell you about the night The Supremes crashed

A little Halloween party called the monster mash The zombies were out Having fun, the party had just begun The guests included Wolfman, Dracula and his son And three finger Louis Erin Crosston Adrian H

Alpha scientist Javel An Andy Brata succubus has his plus one And everybody could tell Andres Larsen spiked the punch With holy water Armando Navar Benjamin Sairanen Bim Talzer locked Dracula out on the porch

And it really hurt his feelings Brandon Garlak Brian Saylor Brian Whitney Brockway loves the meat milly Burrito Mouth took a swing at the devil Sarah Rev

Chance McDermott was tripping balls so hard He thought everyone was normal Chris Brower Julius Glare Dan B Dracula politely asked the artist formerly known as Devin To leave after he puked in the blob Dean Costello

Donald Finney Dr. Awkward brought Dr. Awkward's monster And was very pedantic When people called the monster Awkward But that was not what they meant Eric Spalding Fancy Shark Jellaho just kept making Frankensteins

Until they drank all the beer Greg Cunningham just kept fighting drunk Frankensteins Hamboon Araca Javer Al Aiden James Boyd brought a Van Helsing as a date And not one of the chill ones

Jeff Orozky Neil John Dean John Hector McFarlane transformed into a bat Because it's way cheaper to get drunk as a bat John McCammond John Minkoff Josh Shpaby

Josh S Ken Paisley M. Jahi Chappelle broke the chandelier Trying to show off for the wolf men And he was not impressed Matt Riley Max Barois split into six parts Michael Laird

Michael Wells was a perfect gentleman But Mickey Lohman was the malignant monster On his back and a total embarrassment Mike Stiles Mojoo Neil Bailey Neil Schaefer ate every single one Of the mummy's hard boiled eggs

Those were work snacks Nick Ralston Patrick Herps made the monster From the black lagoon crying the coat glossy Rain Vargas Sarkovsky Sean Chase brought a pure mood CD And wouldn't stop playing it

Because it was, his words, so funny Spotty reception Superanarch summoned a demon And made it do a keg stand Ted H. Timi Lehi Dostigard Tom Sakura Tommy G. Whalen Russell spray painted

All the Hellhounds pink because he thought it would be cute Yossarian let all the Hellhounds out And it was not cute Aidan Mouet What dialed the cops? The monster cops, they did the bash They beat those monsters ass The monster bash

It was monster police brutality