The Doug Stanhope Podcast - 10 Minute Podcast in Daytona Beach, Florida - pt.02

Episode Date: March 25, 2016

Pre Order Doug's book "Digging Up Mother: A Memoir" on Amazon and Barnes & Noble.Mini Bingo Update and asking you to send things to her in Phoenix.   Doug is in Daytona Beach, Florida during Spring Break 2016. Doug decided to keep drinking and do 10 minute podcasts throughout the day.   Recorded March 24, 2016 in Daytona Beach, FL with Doug Stanhope (@dougstanhope), and Ggreg Chaille (@gregchaille). Produced & Edited by Ggreg Chaille.LINKS: YOUTUBE.COM - Castle Rock Kenny Video - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RooyxNj1tDY   kenny4mayor.com Websitehttp://www.kenny4mayor.com/   Doug Stanhope's Celebrity Death Pool - https://www.dougstanhopescelebritydeathpool.com/ Pre Order Doug's book "Diggin Up Mother: A Love Story" on Amazon and Barnes & NobleBrian Hennigan's book, "Patrick Robertson: A Tale Of Adventure" Available now -http://ataleofadventure.com/Closing song, "Castle Rock Kenny 4 Mayor", by Kalle Mathiesen (@8Kalle). Watch the video on Youtube.com here -  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RooyxNj1tDYDoug's DVD/CDs are all available at DougStanhope.comSupport the show: http://www.Patreon.com/stanhopepodcast

if you can just feed these out, it's fucking great. Every 10 minutes. I'll put them out. It won't matter. Do you want to... No, no, no. Keep this in.

Keep this in. No, I know. We have one more Squarespace, but I... Squarespace! It needs to be a full podcast. We have a podcast and we put it on Squarespace.

Do we? Yeah, we're on Squarespace. Brett Erickson's on Squarespace. Do we? Yeah, we're on Squarespace. Brett Erickson's on Squarespace. Kennyformayor.com is on Squarespace. Kennyformayor. I made that podcast in 10 minutes. Seriously, way late at night, drunk. At least 11 people have moved to Bisbee because they want to support Kennyformayor.

Because they want to support Kenny for mayor. And if you have not heard, just go to YouTube and Google Kenny Mayor Bisbee and listen to Matthiasen or I don't know his fucking name. He's a fucking sweet or I can play it at the end of the podcast. No, no, you're not fucking editing any of the 10 minute podcasts. No, I can play it while we're listening to it. It'll play through the whole thing. No, no, don't. Don't. Let people Google search Kenny Mayor Bisbee on YouTube,

and they can hear it, because the song will get stuck in your fucking head the same way Kenny will be the goddamn mayor of Bisbee. What started this? Bingo mail gag bingo bingo's in this fucking mental hospital and i don't i don't want to say uh too much negative until she gets out unless they straighten their shit out but please send mail to bingo no matter if you hear this a year from now still make the legend of bingo continue valley hospital care of amy bingaman patient, very important. Patient number 30019. And the address is 3550 East Pinchot.

P-I-N-C-H-O-T. Pinchot Avenue. Bisbee. I mean, Phoenix. What? Phoenix. It's not Phoenix. What? Phoenix. It's not busy. It's Phoenix.

I know. All right. They're playing along. It's a 10-minute podcast. Phoenix 85018. Phoenix, Arizona. For those of you in Estonia or the European regions, the EU, the Nigeria. Belgium.

Tanzambique. Tanzambique. I like that one. It's a new one. I just renamed it. I just overthrew a government. I just toppled a dictator with that one. Hey, it's catchy.

We like that one better. All right. So bingo. Here's what happens when you guys mail her shit. She's in this fucking nuthatch. She's crazy pouch. She's been moved to a facility since she went in in Bisbee. I want to make sure everyone gets the updates because this is coming up

after the last one. She's been in a week and she got a preliminary visit with her doctor what's that two days ago what's a preliminary well that means tomorrow i'm a doctor you're the patient she said literally three minutes so yeah introduction i just i just want to know who you are and tomorrow we're gonna so today is tomorrow where she had another preliminary meeting and two days from now she'll get her real meeting really this time no really i know we've had two days of really, really, but really yes. This is the way the system works?

Yeah. It's like if you you're driving around drunk on spring break and you get into a huge car wreck smashes your head flat and your femurs busted and compound fracture.

And they go, okay, we have to admit you right away because this is a dire situation. This is serious. We cannot wait. This has to happen now. Urgent. Danger, Will Robinson. And a week from now, you get to see a doctor for a second. A handshake. Who goes, oh, I'll get

back to you. Oh, that looks really desperate. I'll get back to you. So, yeah, don't put that in the mail. We're going to deal with this. Killer termites be on high alert. No, this DEFCON

3. We're at DEFCON 3. Yeah, don't pull the trigger. All it takes is one itchy... Why, fuck. I was trying to sing a goddamn Elvis Costello. All it takes is one itchy finger. One more widow, one less white nigger. All of us are me.

I'm just saying nigger as much as I can. I know. I don't know what's going on. I don't know. Don't pull the triggerigger as much as I can. I know. I don't know what's going on. I don't know. Don't pull the trigger yet. We'll get there. All right. This is, uh, that's, is that 10 minutes?

That's not 10 minutes. No, not even close. Anyway. That's five minutes. Okay. Well, the, that's how long you've been off stage. Here's the point is when bingo opens mail and we put out that first call to arms send bingo any kind of letter postcards are best because the staff can read them yeah and then just hand them to her and they

so if you send a postcard make sure you write that you're a huge fan or you love her songs or a book or what make it look like she's a celebrity artist related yeah yeah so the people because she's gotten boatloads two days now boatloads of mail but it's been a week so you have to keep it up yeah just keep sending shit to bingo flood Flood. Flood the inbox. You changed my life. You're my whatever. Because these low-watt fucking gurglers who run the front desk. You know what?

If you work at Burger King or Arby's, I understand that you're a fucking asshole because you hate your job. But when people's mental lives are in the balance and you're a fucking asshole and I am taking names. You've definitely run into some of the extreme individuals. Awful. Which is too bad for them. I got to say. You remember punching the table last night? You were super drunk. You got to a point to where we had to clear things out of your way

because I thought you were going to throw everything off the table. You punched the desk where I thought, I think he hurt his hand. Why? Because someone named B****. I am taking names, and I remember them in a blackout, evidently. Yeah. Oh, dude, I've never seen you that angry. Like, you were at a point to where Tracy was grabbing, like, the food that we had,

like, the nuts and the bottle caps, that wonderful meal we played at. She quickly moved them out of the way, and I'm just like, I'm stymied. I don't know what to do because you were so pissed off. I'm like, is this some kind of a, like he's working into something? You were like hitting the table and like smashing, you were smashing your own head. Telling me how you were going to treat this. And I thought, who is this? How come I've never heard of this?

Let's not go too far on this podcast. But yeah, that woman, if she's not fired from everything in life, if she can get a job at Burger King, I will fire her. I will buy the Burger King and fire her. So I won't say anything more until bingo is released. When bingo is released, the floodgates will open. All right. That is a 10 minute podcast.

And we'll do another one. And we'll do these for five days, three times, five times a day. I don't know. Keep going. Don't know. You're not at 10 yet. You're not at 10 yet. You're not at 10 yet. 10 minutes roughly.

Oh, bingo. I want bingo to tell this on the phone because bingo can call us. It's harder for us to call her. when she checked into this fucking nuthouse in Phoenix, she said she has to share a cell. Let's call it a cell, because that's what it is. It's fucking prison. It's incarceration.

Where she is, she's in fucking jail. She wears scrubs, oversized fucking scrubs, blue, goes with her hair nice. Very comfortable. Scrubs are comfortable. Yeah. No shoes. I'm not wearing shoes. First of all, did that other podcast, is that going out? Which one?

Did you find that one? Yeah, I just got it today when you handed me the SD card. No, it's not out. I just got it. By the time they hear this, it's out. I thought you wanted this out today. Well, yeah, put the other one out and just hammer, hammer. All right.

The longest podcast ever because we're here for five days. Sean Rouse, Junior Stopka, Andy Andrist, Chad Shank, Tracy. I was... I was axing this a lot. Is it Wernit or Wernet? Wernet. It's Shaley.

Yeah, you're not properly married. We should do that. We get tattoos and you get married. My mom finally died, so I got a married. We should do that. We get tattoos and you get married. My mom finally died, so I got a ring. Oh, yeah. Your dead mother trying to overshadow this whole thing. Well, I said, Mom, step up. I got to get Doug to stop talking about bingo.

It's driving me nuts. Here's what happened with bingo gets into this Phoenix mental hospital. She has a roommate. gets into this phoenix mental hospital she has a roommate is she had to wait for 24 hours just to have in the emergency room in bisbee waiting for any bed to open up in any mental hospital from tucson sista, Phoenix, Yuma. Yuma? Yuma. Yuma was there.

She's not going to fucking Yuma. You got to Yuma to die. Well, I've never seen it happen, but it is on the list. Could happen. No, she's not going to fucking Yuma. But she has been to Sierra Vista. She wanted to go to a place that had an actual doctor. Like someplace she hasn't been before already. She's had experience in these other places, right?

Benson. Which is... They got a Walmart. She wanted a real doctor, and she's still maintaining. She's so fucking beautiful in her optimism. This Dr.

Raby is her name. She goes, oh, she wears high heels, and she has fake tits, and I love her name. She goes, oh, she wears high heels and she has fake tits and I love her. She's like my Dr. Bazell. Yeah. I'll plug fake tits and

high heels. She's not going to complain. And she loves this doctor even though it's been eight days to see a doctor and preliminary and in two days we're actually gonna have an actual doctor meeting she checks into this phoenix mental hospital i'm people. I'm fucking hammered. We've been drinking mimosas all day. It's 24 hours after she left Bisbee.

Her roommate, when she gets to this place, goes, I asked people, I don't want no fucking roommate. And she quotes Bible scripture out loud at night, overnight, all night. That's soothing. And then tells Bingo how much she fucking hates her. And Bingo's been going, I can't even go to my room because she hates me so much. And then after a week, Bingo called me today and she goes, I finally snapped on her.

She fucking dressed down this black, fat black angry girl she goes listen shut the fuck up you've made me feel like nothing but a piece of shit this whole time it's hard enough being in here but to be with you and fuck and you're like oh rudy rudy rudy rudy and finally shirted up she dressed her down so badly that she actually sheepishly walked in and apologized afterwards oh nice she took it all into account fucking bingos made me fucking cry so many times. What a champion she is in this place. So please send mail to, again, Valley Hospital, Amy Bingaman, patient number 30019. Make sure you have that and send her anything. Send her anything goofy

they have to watch her open envelope so if it's a bunch of dick pics it doesn't matter bingo won't care but it will be funnier if the other people do care no drugs nothing to get her in trouble let me finish

Phoenix Valley Hospital Amy Bingaman patient number three zero zero one nine fuck three five five zero or five three three zero all right what's this no the address now i know i'm drunk enough i can't remember is it five i can cut this out give it to tracy you're not cutting anything out they're going to listen to this while she fucking looks it up you're going to talk about something else please hold for that address

the thing is for bingo to actually dress down someone we've seen her through an entire tour she never pops off she deals here just write the whole is it 3-5 or whole thing. Just say it. Is it 35 or 53?

She does have a mic. 3550. All right. It's 3550 East Pinchot, P-I-N-C-H-O-T Avenue, Phoenix, 85018. All right. Got it. For bingo to dress down anyone ever. Raise her voice to not agree.

They're like, hey, we're all going paragliding tomorrow. And she goes, oh, that sounds great. You want to go? Yeah, yeah, we'll figure something out. And then she walks away. Rather than saying, I'm scared of heights, she will just politely bow out forever. It will always be that for her to actually say no or to actually dress someone down.

And not only is it like prison, it's exactly like jail where she is. It's no different than jail. It's actually worse on some levels than jail. You have more freedom in jail on some levels. in jail on some levels and for her to have this stereotypical cliched angry black cellmate oh you're gonna get fucked in jail by a guy named bubba well she's got that angry fucking black cellmate, and then for her to fucking man up and bow up her wide shoulders and go, hey, listen, you know what?

How about a little bit of fuck you and making that girl apologize? Bam! Bam! Doctor! Science! Joey Diaz! Motherfucker!

We'll be back with a 10-minute podcast, plus or minus, with fucking with Daniel Swanson after this. Click.