The Doug Stanhope Podcast - Ep.#438: Sam Tallent's Audio Book Release

Episode Date: March 18, 2021

Sam Tallent and Andy Andrist join Stanhope in the Virtual FunHouse to discuss their new releases, "Running the Light" on Audible.com and "Last Shot" video, respectively.  Buy Sam's book, "Running The Light", at http://samtallent.com. Sam and his comedian buddy Nathan Lund have a podcast called Chubby Behemoth: https://apple.co/2YegRUH. Andy's new video release will be available soon. You can always check NatureJack.com for updates. Recorded March 10th, 2021 at the New FunHouse in Bisbee, AZ with Doug Stanhope (@dougstanhope), Sam Tallent (@TallentSam), Andy Andrist (@andandrist), Tracey (@egglester), and Ggreg Chaille (@gregchaille). Produced and Edited by Chaille. We have no idea what the future holds so get on the Mailing List at https://www.dougstanhope.com/. When we know, we'll let you know. LINKS - Thanks to our sponsor HelixSleep.com. HelixSleep is offering UP TO $200 OFF all mattress orders AND two free pillows for our listeners at HelixSleep.com/stanhope. Also, thanks to BetterHelp.com for sponsoring this podcast. As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at BetterHelp.com/stanhope. Listen to more of Andy Andrist on his podcast, Issues With Andy. New episodes every Friday at Patreon.com/issueswithandy  Doug's new book, "No Encore For The Donkey" available exclusively at Audible.com - https://amzn.to/31uwvO0 Mix Tape Time Machine Podcast with John Norris, Matt Collins and Ggreg Chaille - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mix-tape-time-machine-podcast/id1554596023 Visit the Stanhope Store - http://www.dougstanhope.com/store/ Closing song, “The Stanhope Rag”, written and performed by Scotty Conant for Doug Stanhope and used with permission – Available on Soundcloud - https://soundcloud.com/scottyconant Photo Credit - ChailleSupport the show: http://www.Patreon.com/stanhopepodcast

Okay, a big shout out today to Helix Sleep. Take their two-minute sleep quiz and they'll match you to a mattress that'll give you the best sleep of your life. Helix is offering up to $200 off all mattress orders and two free pillows to our listeners. Find your perfect mattress at helixsleep.com slash Stanhope. My last gig was March of 2020. So it's only not even six months apart. So, yeah, we haven't done gigs. Usually if I'm playing a fucking $50 ticket gig and Andy's stepping on my dick, I'm like, come on.

Or if Andy's like running off, getting fucked up. Well, if we do basically a triple run, and we love doing that fucking run, New Mexico, Colorado, Wyoming, Montana, Idaho, Salt Lake, Flagstaff, and back. Yeah. And I'm like, yeah, no, I would love Andy's energy

because he can't step on my dick if I have no material. Well, by the end of it, he will. Yeah, not the first night he won't. No. Like most most comics steal from somebody and then they leave.

Just fucking hang out. That's what we do, J. Lee. We co-headline and he has to close every night so I can sit on his dick. Yeah. Yeah, I'll host the whole thing. It'll be a nightmare. Good night. Good night.

Good night. You're listening to the Doug Stanhope Podcast. Good breaking news. Hey, Sam Talent. Hey, guys. How are you? I just got done legions of skanks podcast. I'm pretty drunk. That's all right.

I'll carry this thing. No, no. I thought I'd carry this thing. No, no. I thought Andy would carry this thing for you. No. No. But I have nothing. This is Sam Talent Hour. Andy, are you in the cockpit of a plane?

I am. I'm flying a plane right now. I may have to do a few announcements about the weather and temperature of where we're going. They like to know where we're going. This is one and a half hour from landing. Greg, where are you? I'm in Boise. Oh, wow.

He's in coach. He's in coach in the plane. I'm in coach. I'm in steerage. I'm in a cage with the dogs. Doug's obviously in the bar cart this morning. Yeah. Yeah.

I had to make a decision. Do I do legions of skanks drunk or do I do this way more drunk or yeah. Yeah. What I did is that I, I started drinking on my 1 p.m. And then I go, well, I got Sam Talent and Andy that will talk over each other. And I can just sit back drunk on this. But I didn't realize how drunk I was going to get.

Yeah, this is actually this is how fucking drunk you are. This is your intervention. We initiated this call. We all love you to death your intervention we initiated this call we all love you to death and we just want you to get help yeah but you have to understand i'm gonna black it out yeah so am i but i'm sober i'm gonna wake up and go no one cares about me forgetting you all intervened and told me you're gonna die yeah but i did get sam talent plugs out including on legion of skanks thank you a fucking book also ricky williams retweeted you talking about my book which is very crazy those are two worlds i didn't know would ever collide

you and ricky and Ricky Williams talking about my book. Well, I did. I did a very strong bit about Ricky Williams when he quit the Dolphins. And then he found out about it years later and thanked me for it. Well, he's on island time. But then he was going to write a blurb for my book and he never got back to me i think the intervention is more to keep you from doing legion of skanks you don't need to debase yourself that way doug hey you already run with some questionable characters yeah man you don't need a bunch of wallet chain hot topic employees the last thing you need is a scandal at this stage of your career i would love a doug stanhope scandal whatever you did that was actually a scandal must have been so fucked up it'd be disgusting and depraved first of all someone would have to pay attention

to me the the best thing that uh has ever happened to me is being ignored. Because, yeah, compared to a lot of the scandals, they're weak in comparison. You're no Woody Allen. Yeah, man, you were. Maybe it's because you didn't form a family around you. Oh, my goodness. He did the opposite. He started killing them off.

Yeah. That still didn't get it yeah that was woody's long game but he just never got around to it this is what we were talking about on skanks or they they i i think they enjoy the controversy and they they get this that fucking milo guy and they, like, you're just encouraging fucking trolling and there's no reason for it. Like, you're encouraging all these fucking assholes, zero talent assholes who are just stoking.

If I could make a living being a troll, I would do it better than anyone. Like, there's so many times i go to make a tweet that would be trolling if it wouldn't cost me fan base and the other day is gonna go hey listen to this podcast they have comedians and female comedians that are great but just do it in a very positive way and i go i can't do that my fucking actual sense of humor is brendan walsh yeah like just goofy fucking shit like that. But over the course of decades, I'm a social fucking commentator. That's not really – like what I laugh at is Brendan Walsh. I would be a complete Brendan Walsh.

But at this point, they think that I'm some social commentator. Yeah, it sucks that you have that very juvenile sense of humor and now people think you're smart. That was your biggest failure, dude, is letting people think you're smart. You totally should have been like me and Andy, dude. Yeah. You want to be Einstein but not have him catch on. Yeah.

Also, just like Einstein, you should be like Einstein and Woody Allen and just start banging kids. For a second there, I thought I said Epstein and then I was like, oh, fuck, no. Doug, what if you started dating Andyy's daughter my daughter's engaged so i don't know doug would have to be boots on the ground in colorado right now how many times andy if i i threatened you with that yeah yeah you offered my daughter you said uh if she leaves the guy she came to the show with, she could go hang out with you and Johnny Depp. And my daughter dumped the guy, but it was too late to make the play.

There had to be a second there where she thought, how much do I like this guy? Oh, and he was shorter than her, too, by quite a bit. He was already working that way. Yeah. Let's get this out of the way. Sam Talent, you're our, I like to say, our audible

version of your book. It is. It's our baby. March 16th? That's right. This is not the audio, but... That's the script for the audio. When I was on Legion of Skanks, that cover,

they loved the cover. I'm still kind of a fan of the old cover. I'm not against the new cover. Because you're not East Coast fucking controversial. Yeah. You're not manufacturing anger. Man, East Coast comics are so weird compared to us on the West Coast. Like, I don't think any of them like stand-up or comedians, but they do it.

Meanwhile, I'm having a blast. I've seen Doug do more real anger in the morning at, like, a mot then i see you know faked in a new york act doug just getting and then he's not as angry throughout the day but those it seems like those guys are happy yeah when they're angry and there's no caviar left over from the night before it's a bloodbath everybody literally leave leave the house. And Sam just said, as a West Coast comic, could you open up those blinds and show us the sea?

Yeah, sorry. Good point. Long Beach Harbor behind you? Yeah, as a high plains comedian. We'll be landing in Long Beach in just about 17 minutes. Also, in Andy's special, he says he's on a glacier and he's watching a storm come in over the great plains where the fuck was that andy where's their

glaciers in the great plains well this was a few years ago oh yeah climate change totally fucked up that joke uh fucking where was that that was in montana but i didn't i was on a a glacier yeah not a uh-huh montana might be the only continental divide i was right up there all right right in the middle point andy my bad there's the special is great by the way andy the oh and that said doug was going to announce that but i'm postp postponing releasing it because there's a late entity into the competition for my charms or whatever. Anyway, I'm

going to have a distribution situation and I'm delayed the release by a few fucking months. Months? Yeah. Four months. Well, I guess we can terminate the call. Thanks for tuning in, Andy. I did try to explain to Doug but he was too drunk And I tried to explain that I didn't have

Anything to plug and then he was like I hope you'll carry it I'm drunk I'm like okay Pretty drunk You seem alright man You blend into your background enough that I can't notice How red your face is probably from drinking

No no it's just two hours of drinking, but I had to start at 1 p.m. Oh, the pre-show. Yeah. You don't want to be unprofessional? Well, the problem is I'm almost out of vodka, which is

unheard of in this house. So I was drinking whiskey cokes, which, yeah, they hurt you a lot more. Oh, yeah, you're going to have a stomachache. You're going to sugar crash. No, I'm going to Seroquel crash. Who's taking care

of you if Greg's not there? Is Tracy still there? Dave Rader. He's on a conference call right now. Oh, handsome Dave. Hey, Trace. Handsome Dave, yeah. That Dave guy's dreamy. I hate it. I hate when there's a hot guy hanging out. Mishka's there. He's hot. Dave's there. And then it's just like me

sweating in basketball shorts. Yeah, I wouldn't do you any favors being there. Oh, I know, dude. You're a dreamboat compared to me. Sam Talent texted me the other day and he says hey my wife who's in the medical profession

has a hot tip in Amarillo which is about 15 hours from here they're giving away COVID shots to anyone who shows up I'll even come down and drive you there and I thought what a fucking to anyone who shows up. I'll even come down and drive you there.

And I thought, oh, what a fucking existential hell. That sounds like how you get COVID. Amarillo. Yeah, big Texas. In a carpool situation. They're injecting it into you. I'm vaxxed, man.

I'm unkillable now. We can eat the big steak while we're there. I just thought you might want to go on a car ride. I was thinking about you like an old dog. You're going to put him down? Yeah, afterward. One last ride? Come on, get in, boy. You can sit in the flatbed.

I'll throw boiled peanuts back there for you. I'm getting my vaccination delivered tomorrow. I think I don't have fucking connections. Jeez. I mean, I got it before you do. So how about that? Did you ever think, Doug, in any point in your life, you would trust a needle drug coming to you at your door in Bisbee?

Who's giving you the vax? Dave Rader? No, Kenny. Kenny's the only licensed. I only got to hang out with Kenny like once and it was when we went to the gas station. And man, that was quite the ride, dude.

That guy rules. That's two blocks. When I go back, if I ever make it back to Bisbee, if I get faxed, I'm going to take that fucking Kenny out to the nearest basketball court and beat his ass. I've developed an outside game. Oh, you're not just throwing down massive tomahawk slam dunks? No, fuck no.

That's what he would want. He would want me to get physical. I did see that video you posted, yeah that was a short but yeah i've gotten i mean you know covid covid has given me a legitimate chance to play some college ball and i think i got some eligibility yeah 25 year red shirt yeah i'd be the oldest community college guy and then i'll be like nobody said a dog can't play hockey or nobody said if a 60 year old dude can't hoop and i won't play defense no you'll lose cherry pick yeah yeah let the fucking scrappers do that shit you know and you're like a white Robert Parrish. This will be great.

I tried to sell some Robert Parrish cards when I was like 20-something, and I had Robert Parrish cards, and I was in Boston, and the corners were too saft, so they didn't buy them. Oh, they were rounded a little bit? Yeah. I didn't know what his insult was, but I left knowing I didn't make a deal. Took years to realize what he was saying. Man, corner the market on Robert Parrish cards. Sam Talent, let's say we might be coming your way. we might be coming your way now the vaccine is available to people like me oh so you're not hanging up your jersey for so long

you said you were never going to go back out no I have to go back out I have dates booked I just hoped COVID would never end and then when it was trending the other day, CDC says, if you've been vaccinated, you can be indoors without a mask. And I go, okay, that

means, and they say like 25% of the population's been vaccinated. By the time I go back out, that means it'll be full houses. I was not going to play fucking in a plexiglass box on a stage

with people wearing fucking... No, save that for the meet and greet. The boy in the bubble will meet you in a few minutes. So when are you going to be in Denver? Now, well, I'm thinking

to start back in comedy, we do one of those in my book, the fucking Mountain Time Zone run. No one can hear you bomb. Yeah. We'll go up and see Chaley and go to that glacier in Montana where the

Great Plains is so prominent. You can ski it. Yeah. You're not supposed to let that, you know, like that level of ear should never be applied to my music. There's all kinds of flaws. There's all kinds of flaws in that. The whole thing's flawed.

Yeah. And I said to Chaley and he he said why don't you rethink this i'm going out that way in uh june i think too just go see my kid why i said we should do this with andy because my problem working with andy is he'll fucking step pre-covid andy well you generally pre-COVID is the same Andy as now. That's why, did you notice I interrupted him? The only difference

is now Andy has a 12-foot jump shot. Yeah. Well, I think I got a little longer range than that, sir. Andy filmed his special in 2019 at the Funhaus, and he hasn't done a gig since.

Wow. I've been in a closet with a club owner doing blow. Actually, when I do the math, my last gig was march of 2020 so it's only you know not even six months apart so uh yeah we haven't done gigs usually if i'm playing a fucking you know 50 ticket gig and andy's stepping on my dick, I'm like, come on. Or if Andy's running off getting fucked up, well, if we do

basically a triple run, and we love doing that fucking run, New Mexico, Colorado, Wyoming, Montana, Idaho, Salt Lake, Flagstaff, and back. Yeah. And I'm like, yeah, no, I would love Andy's energy

because he can't step on my dick if I have no material. Well. By the end of it, he will. Yeah, not the first night he won't. No. Like most comics steal from somebody and then they leave that's what we do jaylee is we co-headline and he has to close every night so i can yeah yeah i'll host the whole thing it'll'll be a nightmare. We've talked about it.

Would you work for drinking? Sam, I noticed you've got a lot of dates on your website, samtalent.com, T-A-L-L-E-N-T. Yeah, good for you, man. You're right back out there. Yeah, dude, I got that vax, and I'm just out there. Man, if I could have done a book tour on top of all the love that I got from people, I would have bought that house next door to Doug. Yeah.

That's why I don't want to put my comedy special out when I can't get gratuities and hugs, high fives. Yeah, you can't get slipped old quaaludes. What's the point? You do some Zoom release party. Who's going to give me bumps at that? Yeah. How are you going to get some limp dick head? Well, that I could still manage, but the rest of it

I'd have to call out for. He's practicing that. That's what he meant by the long game. Yeah, I use rotten fruit for that. What? Not anymore. But as a younger man one time on a road trip I did

fuck a peach. It was on my way to Idaho and I stopped at a place and it sold a peach. It was a windfall and peach and it was on sale and it just looked like a drippy vagina so i bought it and then i you know you can only have that in your passenger seat for so long on a long drive so i did make love tiny well i ripped that big stone in it.

Punch the seat out the back. Yeah, you know what I like when I'm having sex with something is a thorny pit. Yeah, it was like last call. I kind of panicked. I microwaved a banana peel one time. You what? Microwaved a banana peel one time. He what? Microwaved a banana peel?

That was the depths of my masturbatory grossness. Because some guy was like, yeah, man, microwave a banana peel. It's fun. And I just remember putting a very hot banana peel on my ween. It sucked, man. I think it might have been a joke.

I do want for sure. my uh my mom i had poison oak and she goes she told me i was i had it in my feet and it was all fucked up and she goes like this lady told me to if you rub a banana peel on it it'll help and it did for about 30 seconds of relief and then it was fucked up you don't rub a banana peel on festering toes. No. Did you ever smoke banana peels trying to get high? No, not yet. Yeah.

Report back in a half hour. Bitch, give me a banana. You're way too young to have... That was a 1970s urban legend the smoking banana peels and you're only like unfortunately Sam Talent is only like 34 years old I think yeah in May I'll be 34 yeah but they also the dead milkman had a song that kind of brought it out too that was uh 90s right yeah we also had the Anarchist

Cookbook. I mean, you know, eat a bunch of nutmeg, all that bullshit. The nutmeg thing was the worst because you... Yeah, pretty much. You know, the same way you guys thought Rod Stewart took his rib out to suck his own

dick, we thought it was Marilyn Manson. Well, actually, the thing with stewart was he had to have his stomach pumped out and they found a tanker truck full of cum yeah and that was that was britney spears when i was a kid the amount of cum you know i just i took it you know as a young man in my it's like okay that sounds reasonable but then the amounts kept changing and it's like, you know, as a young man, it's like, okay, that sounds reasonable. But then the amounts kept changing, and it's like, shit, you know. Has anybody asked Rod how much it was? Yeah. We had two gallons of cum. How did that happen?

Mr. Stewart, Mr. Stewart. Hi, BBC. Big fan, big fan. Yeah. This is a long, long time festering question. How much cum was it? I'll take my answer off the air. I'm going to be up on my glacier waiting for an answer.

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at helixsleep.com slash Stan Hope. Oh, man. pillows for our listeners at helixsleep.com slash stanhope oh man so when are you going to start hitting the road doug when's that happening i don't know it was just when that two days ago when that like it was a wake-up call where oh fuck i really am gonna have to go back and do comedy i was hoping covid would last forever and now now i'm getting vaccinated and uh so yeah i i my my real dates start in august the ones postponed for a year and a half so yeah i'm probably gonna have to go back out and uh and and and and do some warm-up shows. Yeah. I have no idea what I said before COVID

that is still relevant, what I could change into being relevant, and what new shit. I've been writing in a notebook. I have some premises. What if you just did long-form improv? It's like,

Hey, it's me, Doug. And this is my group mission. Improbable. We need a suggestion. I could improv. I'd have a way more popular.

Podcast. That's the beauty of my act is I can't write a fucking joke to save my life, but there is always someone in the crowd wearing a stupid hat that I can do seven minutes on. So, well, I can't write a fucking joke to save my life, but there is always someone in the crowd wearing a stupid hat that I can do seven minutes on. So, well,

that's why we want to start in the mountain time zone. All the dumb hats. Where people can't remember what you said enough to quote it. Those rooms. They're pretty lax up there too with the gatherings as it is. Oh yeah. I'm in Fort Collins. There's no rulesx up there, too, with the gatherings as it is. Oh, yeah. I'm in Fort Collins. There's no rules here.

God is dead, man. People are doing body shots. It rips. Wait. Isn't that where the megachurches are? No, it's Colorado Springs. Oh, that's right. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Fort Collins. Much cooler. Thank you. Yeah. Hey, Sam, what are you going to do up at Yale? You got a gig up at Yale in, what is it? April 8th.

I'm talking to them about literature and writing. It's a Zoom thing. I'm talking to a bunch of their undergrads. Oh, man, are you going to start dating students like Mishka? And you guys always put me in such bad positions with Mishka. Mishka's my friend. He's been very good and he's helped me a lot.

And then you guys are, you guys are just characters. Well, you pointed out how handsome he was. So you started. Try renting from him. Oh yeah. Who's Andy. Did you live in his house or was that Levine? No. Oh, yeah. Andy, did you live in his house, or was that Levine?

No. No. No, Olivia, Grace, and Levine. Right. And he's... I don't want to even give him any... Yeah, let's move on. I live in Eugene. I'm like the character in your book,

only I haven't had the uncomfortable talk with the roommate. I had a kid that went to Boulder. I got in a head-on collision with a freightliner coming back from a gig years ago where I should have been dead. Yeah, man, your name's in my book. Andy Andrus' name dropped in the first chapter. Yeah, when I heard that, I was like, oh, I waited. I went out to a winery and read the first chapter, and, when I heard that, I was like, oh, I waited and I'll read, you know, I went out to a winery and read the first chapter

and I enjoyed it. Thank you. I, you know, I've been in that closet. Andy, how was the rest of the book? I haven't read the rest of the book. What happened? No, but I mean, you know, like I thought, you know, of course you get, you know, some of that, all that experience is as a comic,

you know, common of, you know, at least, I don't know. I've had shows that worked out though. It's funny, Andy, that the, the you part was going to be me, but I was too famous. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Well, I've done, I've done bumps that were meant for you oh i wanted to do some with doug well let me just hit it and see if it's worth bringing him down here for it's like when i opened for you at the oriental theater and that guy had dmt and i was

like yeah i'll make sure he gets it. Never. Not on me. Sam Talent, delivery man. The last time I had DMT was after one of the Death Valley parties. I threw it out the window. I was crying. Audibly crying.

I was like, get this out of my of my car now you just need to watch a commercial baby i miss people i'm so high was that that death valley party you threw that dmt out the window and it all blew directly into brendan walsh's face out the window and it all blew directly into Brendan Walsh's face. And then he was shattered for like six months. Yeah. We snorted the remains of one of our

fallen. We mixed mushrooms and cocaine, but I don't recall that ever happening. You snorted mushrooms? Yeah, didn't we? Was that mocaine? Mocaine was mushroom, right? Yeah, but that was not DMT. No, no, but it was mushrooms and cocaine we mixed.

Yeah, because Redman had made a joke about it, and I go, oh, we have to do it now. Yeah, it wasn't a funny joke. Wasn't that the night everybody was just laid out in a mess? The night I got waterboarded and almost died in the shower. I don't know what you're... I remember laughter coming out of a showerhead I was tripping so hard. I saw laughter.

Yeah. I didn't hear it. I saw it coming out of a fucking showerhead. But I think it was the first party where i had dmt and i'd already done it once and i like i had it and i'm glad we didn't do it and then i threw it out the fucking window on the drive back i remember you telling me about it gave you uh apocalyptic nightmares and then i was thinking, I think I might pass. I already have those going.

They're not really nightmares. I wake up happy. Oh, my God. We had the, what was the mescaline, Andy? Yeah. That fucked you up for hours. I became an ancient Indian. So you don't want to just discover I became an ancient Indian. You don't want to just discover you're

an ancient Indian. You kept thinking birds were after you. There was a fucking bird. There was a crow that matrixed and I was looking at it going, oh, fuck, man. It's not moving, but it was frozen in the air. Then I looked at the Indians and they knew what I was seeing. We were all sharing

the same vision quest. But I was like, man, how did I get here? You know, I started out a Caucasian. Now I'm a 75-year-old alcoholic Indian. Not that all Indians are alcoholics, but these particular ones were. You were, yeah. Yeah. Well, those were the guys who made their own moonshine in their trailer.

And we had James Inman in the trailer, and Inman was drinking it, and the Indians were like, oh, no. When two old Indians are telling you you're drinking too much or too fast, kind of listen. And he did not. They have DMT vaporizer pens now. Yeah, I've done that DMT that way Just on a vape it It shouldn't be easy to do You should have to smoke DMT out of like a hole

It shouldn't be convenient, easy and totally accessible Yeah and clandestine It should be like a bleached cow skull That you have to have lit with some kind of brulee torch I was at a hippie concert So I couldn't turn down anything They'd think I was a cop. Is DMT legal?

No. It probably falls into some bucket of therapy, maybe. It's also, you can synthesize it out of most living things. If you know a little thing about chemistry, it's really easy to make. Oh, yeah. I know...

Wait. I don't know anything about fucking chemistry. It sounds like something that Ed Gein would drop in the conversation. You know, you can make a belt out of that fucking chick over there. Everyone's just a belt

waiting to be made. He was the original MacGyver. I'm still not over apocalyptic nightmares. It's the worst Yelp review for a drug ever. Oh, boy. Read it in, Andy.

I was waiting for Andy to get high. I was waiting for Andy to get high. I was waiting for Doug. I was waiting for Andy to shut up. So we're not all talking over each other. Tracy, by the way, I'm sorry, but I was sending you the XL shirt.

I did. I had, I immediately felt bad about it. It's just that, you know, there's two people who are petite men, and then Chad Shank is huge, and, you know, you're a woman with curves to your upper body, so I didn't want to have

you... I can't make it any better. You have nothing to explain. You have nothing to explain. There's no t-shirt size exemption that say can size. Yeah. Two canned pumpkins will fit in this. to explain. There's no t-shirt size exemption that say can size. It's so true. Two canned pumpkins will fit in this.

Is this zoned for jugs? Wow, this is so legion of skanks with your fucking derogatory comments to women. Yeah. We wanted that transition to be smooth doug they probably throw the word cans around a lot that's old school cans on that dame there is a there is an opening for a cancelled tour I've been trying to

come up with the name for it like the pre-cancellables something like that I thought you were talking about like cancelled tour like it would be Woody Allen and people have been cancelled Shane like that was the one like people have been canceled. Shane,

that was the one I... People have been canceled, but not to an extent of... People have just been called out for oh, he said something naughty. Yeah.

I was saying this on Legions of Skanks. We can start branding. Not branding is not the right word, but it's about time that comedy had genres. Like, it's just comedy has always been the way it works. Well, no. How about... way it works well no how about what i've been a i've been a rom-com uh act for most of my presentation yeah my comedy's been described as an apocalyptic nightmare

melting glacier in the wrong state melting glacier was the name of that indian who got inman drunk right now the iron iron eagle or some shit right you remember shaley iron eyes cody no the indian brothers in uh in in no i don't know them i didn't it didn't hit me like it hit you no they come back well they came back till they couldn't i hung out with indian princesses in tama iowa and they were like after, they're like, you can sleep in our trailer. And I was like, cool. So I get there and I open up the trailer and it stinks real bad. And they're like, oh, yeah, I'm sorry.

We haven't really cleaned it since my son blew his head off in there. Many moons ago. Yeah, exactly. Let me see if my lady friend will name me a... There's a... Hang on, let me see if my lady friend will name me a... There's a... Hang on. Let me get the... That's an uplifting story, Sam. Hey, man. He's just trying to fill time.

Sam, where did you stay that night? Did you stay in the trailer? Yeah, of course. Oh, man. Yeah. Yeah. They gave me a couple perks. They were like, sorry, we can't really get the smell out of there. They lit some sage. They gave me some Percocet, and I slept in there. Oh, man! Yeah, they gave me a couple perks. They were like, sorry, we can't really get the smell out of it. They lit some sage, they gave me some Percocet, and I slept in there.

It was great, yeah. And then breakfast was terrible, because it was Indian. Nays! So it was all stolen from white men? No, it was given to them by the white men. Yeah. They were allowed to have it by the white man.

Be careful of the blankets. That's how this whole thing got started. You should do a tour where it's just Shane reading Dr. Seuss books. Some crazy shit that Dr. Seuss had to say. Who saw that one coming? He did not like the laundry service. That's a bit...

It's an idea that I don't know what medium to put it in, but about... My dad was killed in the Vietnam War, but then I found letters that he sent from the NAM in combat to my mother, love letters, but he used a racial slur about the enemy.

So now I am trying to get his name removed from the Vietnam Memorial Wall. Word with a K at the end. And a letter. And as much as. If you can see it written out. I love you so much. I don't know why I'm here. I don't know why I'm here. I don't know why we're fighting.

And these gooks that like, but just make at least a letter. But since he said, I am petitioning to get my dad's name removed and torn off the Vietnam. Just the idea of, okay, at what point do you stop? I am selling his Purple Heart and donating the proceeds to Panda Express. We're smashing his Purple Heart. Thank you, lover boy. That's my girlfriend, Dave Rader. And you're lucky.

Yeah. You're all about who's available. I could never hold your love because I had to come back here. Johnny Depp, he's a fly-by-night. It's because I wasn't there that you even checked up with him for a minute.

Oh, and also my island got confiscated. I can't even fucking go to... Oh, they took my boats? They took my fucking island? Shit. You know? Just when I need to court Doug, I got none of the props. I knew it wouldn't work out

with those huskier gentlemen, because I know what a fucking snob you are. Yeah, he's not a size queen. That's for sure. I always say that when people like, oh, you know Johnny Depp, you guys are friends, tell him this.

I go, I don't talk to him, we're friends, but I don't, and I go, Andy Andrews is my best friend, and I don't talk to him ever on the phone. We talked on the phone the other morning. Oh yeah. It was, I know. I, I was like, yeah, I didn't. It's like, you said, call me. And I was like, oh fuck.

He doesn't mean right now. Does he? When it's too much to text. Yeah. But yeah, I talk to whoever's next to me. I don't fucking call people unless I regret it in the morning. The only time I talk to people is drunk dials. Drunk dials. It's almost better to miss a call from you because your voicemails are fucking epic. It's just the diary miss a call from you because your voicemails are fucking epic.

It's just the diary of a madman. I remember that after I left the Funhouse that one time, you were like, hey, did you eat a fucking pizza and not microwave it? What the fuck is this? No, half a pizza. You're just swearing. Your accent comes out. You're like, what? Who eats half a fucking pizza? Did you even cook it, you fat freak?

Like, what? Who eats half a fucking pizza? Did you even cook it, you fat freak? I saw somebody posted a clip of one of Doug's earliest things, and I was thinking maybe when he gets drunk, he gets that accent again. Fucking wicked, fucking pizza, you fucking cunts. Yeah, what are you, furious? I hate to call it a scandal because it isn't, but fucking Alec Baldwin's wife, I guess, is the thing.

Hilaria? Yeah, when I hang out if I go back to Massachusetts I get that fucking accent back. And a lot of people do that. A lot of white sounding black people when they're black people, they start talking a little bit more fucking hood. If you watch Good Will Hunting.

If you watch The Departed, man. Oh, fuck yeah. Microprocessor. Yeah. First of all, that accent was never mine. i have no idea where it came from like i i had a stage voice when i started yeah it's this awkward fucking thing and it's not even a massachusetts accent it's fucking weird i don't know i't explain. As much as I loved it, I couldn't watch the whole clip because of that fucking voice.

Oh my God. Dude. Doug, didn't you tell me you were trying to not sound like Dice? Clay, yeah. You were affected some other kind of hybrid accent? Evidently.

Yeah, you started talking Boston Brahmin. I was just down in Key West with Tom Dustin, and that guy's got the fucking accent for sure. He's always having so much fun when he's talking. He'll talk to old women and be like, all right, mama. And you're like, I could never ever call an old woman mama.

But for some reason, since he sounds like he sleeps inside of a barrel in Boston Harbor, he gets to talk that way. I love Tom, Dustin. I worry for him. That's bad if you're worried about a human being.

Yeah. He's down there. He's leaving Key West, man. He's just Nicolas Cage in it, having a good time. Wait, does he still run a room down there?'s leaving key west man he's just nicholas cage in it having a good time wait is does he still run a room down there yeah comedy key west great club comedy key west yeah yeah we were so drunk chaley was with me when we went down there and i was so drunk the entire time and i think we were there for a while we were there i was there for like 10 days or something and i was so fucked oh that was was that the trip you wrote about with mother no no no this

was recently he was finishing his book down oh right oh really no yeah it was right before covid i went down for vacation and he let me stay at the comedy condo and then Chaley flew down. And I was like so ridiculously drunk the entire time. It was I just saw they had the same thing in Florida because I think I got there during a weird deep freeze, which is how vacations go for me. Oh, I'm going to get out of here. It's January. I got to go someplace warm. And they had, what do you call

those? Oh, fuck. The onesies. You unplug the... Glacier? What's a glacier? One that's not a lamp. Will you grab that for me? Doug, you're talking about the when i got there we had we got onesies oh yeah yeah but what do you call the iguanas not a onesie no no listen they had iguana uh it was so cold that iguanas would fall out of the tree.

Because it would freeze up and drop. So they had to warn people about falling iguanas. Don't get hit by a falling iguana. And I just saw that news story again during a recent fucking Florida freeze. And I'm like, that's what happened. That's playing God telling people to look out for that. That should be something you just get surprised with.

This is the weirdest coconut I've ever seen. And then you record it with a fucking wicked East Coast accent. Like a fucking iguana fell through the wicked fucking damage in the fucking kitchen. I can't do a Boston accent unless I go back there. I can't do one either.

And you know who else can't? Every actor who's not from Boston. There's nothing more embarrassing than listening to a fucking Boston accent. Fucking Ray Donovan. I don't know if you watched that. Yeah, wicked hat.

Like Fargo. You know, like, all right, come on. You're fucking over the top with this. That was a good season of Fargo, huh? It was really good, man. Yeah, I loved that season. I like how you did a costume change. Now you're Steve Bartman.

It's good. I used to have a baseball out here. Man, glory days, huh, pal? Used to have a baseball. That is the only place we see him, Sam, is on that. He's outside. That's a balcony that he's on. Oh, yeah?

He's got it plasticed in with some visqueen, some plastic sheeting up there to keep the squirrels out. Yeah. Squirrels don't understand Zoom time. Last time I was in Eugene, I did Luckies and I hit up... Is that the name of that dive ball? I hit up Andy and I was like, hey man, are you around? And then like 10 days later,

he's like, yeah man, what are you getting into? I'm not still in Eugene, dude. And then somewhere years before that, Sam sent me my headshot from somewhere. Yeah, from Looney's.

Oh, the underground club? Yeah, it was a fucking horrible headshot. And it was the first one I had. And then I did this gig in Klamath Falls. And I was hanging out and trying to, I think I did some blow, whatever, I was partying with this group of people, and everything was cool, till I knocked over a bunch of books, and then I went back, you know, but, uh, and then, so then, there was a sudden snowstorm, I was working with tree, Doug knows Hills Have Eyes tree, and, uh, and there's a snowstorm and uh and so the next morning i was just feeble

hung over and driving back to eugene from clement falls and i couldn't get the snow chains on so i said fuck it and i was doing okay till i lost control skidded in front of a freight liner truck and it slammed i slammed into it head on and then almost went underneath it and then kicked over to the side and I'm throwing out pipes and shit. And then the trucker gets out and he goes, starts yelling at me and I go, I wasn't aiming for your truck, you fucking cunt. But that was as close to dead as you can get coming back. And then a few years later, I went back into that bar of the gig and on my headshot it said thanks for making me your first which i almost for my almost my dying words left on a bar and then i pulled the picture off of the wall on left i won hey this podcast brought to you by betterhelp.com that's betterhelp.com what interferes with your

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Hope. There's a, there's a Ollie Joe Prater documentary on YouTube. I can't suggest it enough. Oh, there is? Yeah, he shot it in San Luis Obispo.

Some strange comedy club near LA. It's called Get Out of My Way. The things he says on stage, it's obscene. I never thought that we should limit free speech until I watched get out of my way and the things he says on stage like it's it's obscene his i've you know i never thought that we should limit free speech until i watched this thing it's fucking gnarly i'll send you a link right now please do yeah because i i just tweeted that in the last several months

i wish there was a fucking documentary about ollie joe prater because he's he's a legend before john fox he's the guy when john fox i worked with him once in reno and i go is that a true story about the legend is and it's ollie joe's ollie joe prater's story john Fox was the guy that was the biggest fuck up that would just keep doing the same bit over and over. He's so fucked up. The legend of Ollie Joe Prater, which I falsely put on John Fox, he'd done so much coke,

his nose started bleeding during a show, like pouring blood, and he didn't know it. And after the audience is aghast and recoiling from, and then he does this. Oh, oh, he goes, what, nobody parties anymore? I thought that was a John Fox legend. Ollie Joe Prater predates John Fox, who that story could very well. He goes, no, that's Ollie Joe Prater.

Ollie Joe Prater, I remember. And I think this is before I even started comedy, And I think this is before I even started comedy that I saw him on TV somewhere. He's like, yeah. He opens up a beer. He goes, yeah, this. I lost. This cost me my wife, my house, my car, my job.

Ah, fuck it. I still have my boat. Drink. That's in that special I just sent you the link to. Good. Have you heard the story about him being underneath a sheet and the sheet caught fire? Because Ollie Joe Prater was like 5'6 and like 340 pounds at the end of his career.

He stacks a tower. Yeah, exactly. He looks like Yosemite Sam if he was stung by a bunch of bees. And he's like, he couldn't get upstairs anymore, so they would just throw a sheet over him and he'd sit on stage the entire time. And then when it was time to headline, they'd be like, alright, here's your headliner.

I'll let you know Prater. And they'd yank the sheet off. Yeah. One time he was like all wasted and he was like he spilled some whiskey on the sheet or whatever and he lit a cigarette and the whole thing just went up in flames. Did he have to start his act early? Yeah, exactly.

Yeah. The feature was like, all right, well, we'll still get paid the same. Make sure you include this link in the podcast notes. I'll text it to you too yeah i can't wait to fucking watch i swear i just fucking tweeted that in the last five months like i i wish there was a documentary but this is a documentary when he was still alive no so it's like footage of his last

special he shot and then a bunch of his friends who i'd never heard of being like you know ollie joe just loves saying the n-word and it's like a fun story uh so yeah he's probably guys you've heard of and worked with it's all it's all interspliced with footage of ollie joe and he's doing every joke that i've heard everyone do, you know, like where he shotguns a beer and he's like, that's all I learned in college. Does all the hits, like literally every stock line Ollie Joe Prater does and laughs at,

like it's the funniest thing he's ever heard. I would love to see a documentary about, that I could fill in some blanks, but there was like, about that I could fill in some blanks. But there was like, who are some of those fucking weird? Who's the Frankie Bastille? Oh, yeah. Frankie Bastille is a legend. And he's actually in Mr. Saturday Night,

which I've always said, Kaylee and I should sit down and watch this together and then mr saturday night because i've never seen it do you see what i did there because it always reminds me of me and chaley's uh ongoing relationship over the years uh and then we started to watch it one night, and it started kind of boring fucking. It's the worst feeling in the world, where you're like, you've got to watch this movie, and then you start watching it, and it sucks,

and you're like, oh, God. Frankie Bastille, I'm sure that's the guy, is in Mr. Saturday Night, where he's the old man, and he's watching fucking evening at the improv or something and he's going, what? This is what they call comedy now? Frankie Bastille just

fucking railing about something. He used to not use his name. He would not have them publicize his name when he would go headline a weekend because he owed so much money for child support. So it would just be like, you know, wits and comedy club presents mystery headliner.

And it's Frankie Bastille every time. Otto and George. They, they booked me at uncle funnies in Davie, Florida. Who booked you? Otto or George? No,

no, no, no. Otto and George. You have to know Otto or George? No, no, no. The block, Otto and George, you have to know Otto and George. Yeah, it's a ventriloquist act, right? Yeah, but he's a fucking crackhead that he was known

for not showing up to gigs because he was on a fucking crack bender. So when they booked him as a triple X rated weekend, they booked me as a co-headliner in case he didn't show up, that I could carry the gig. And he did show up. Hello! I remember watching Otto and George.

I remember watching Otto and George. He had this one bit that, like, I left the room. Like, it was very funny, but, you know what, puppet? You know, the puppet's the bad guy. Yeah, a bit of a racist. Yeah. Colorful language, that puppet. Gorgeous, the puppet. Otto.

The puppet's going, you know what I hate? Black eyes with tattoos. Hey, hey, brother, look at my tattoo. Look at my tattoo. I can't see your tattoo. You should have done it in whiteout, you filthy circus ape. Oh, my God. Yeah.

And I remember being in the room with black people as patrons. And I'm like, oh, I can't even be in the fucking room. This is so awkward. You filthy circus hate. But it was the puppet that said it. Yeah. I saw him at that Chicago Comedy Festival, and Doug told me, yeah, you got to go. So I went and watched this, and it was just funny because it's a comedy festival.

And then he's like hey hey did you get your development deal did you get your development deal drink your bottle of water you pieces of like wow he's talking to me he's talking to all of us but it's just you know i loved it you know it's an abusive it's an abusive dummy i don't i don't remember that you were there fucking dummy. I don't remember that you were there. Not when you were. At the Chicago Comedy Festival, because there was only two.

Yeah, I went the year you weren't there. You told me relax, have fun, you're not going to be the next David Schwimmer. And I was like, god damn it, there goes my hopes and dreams. Good advice. That's good advice. I quote that as one of the

hardest i've ever laughed aside from brian holtzman all the time where he was on stage at a festival in front of industry and i was just in the audience that I've actually fallen literally out of my chair laughing was Otto and George was on stage and just the puppet starts trashing him going, what are you even fucking talking about? You're a fucking crackhead. You're a drunk. You don't show up for gigs. No one fucking cares about you're a fucking crackhead you're a drunk you don't show up for gigs no one

fucking cares about what you say every time your lips move the show sucks what are you here for like just an internal dialogue that he has via the puppet your lips lips move more than mine do. You'd like to think I'd like to think that's what Jeff Dunham has going on in his motel room. My first real road trip ever was

with a ventriloquist act that we were co-headlining for and this was this nebbishy terrified i've never done a comedy club before i usually just work state fairs and they put us up at what you've been to that hotel is it's on it's uh shaley uh yeah it's in it's uh in flagstaff on that main track right across from the green room san francisco is the street monta vista hotel monta vista yeah hotel monta vista and uh Monta Vista and this guy was so terrified that he we weren't making

much money but he was so afraid of this old school hotel. This is a vintage, what do you call it? Old fucking it was a fire hazard

in this guy's mind so he went and got himself a room out of his own pocket at the days in and I go why aren't you staying here in the free room and he said I've had bad experiences before

one time I played a cruise ship and they threw my dummy overboard. I couldn't go through that again if this hotel caught on fire. Yeah, it's hard to find a fucking, you know, legit dummy you can work with

and travel with. Yeah, if you don't have your dummy on the boat you have to like drug a 12-year-old to put him on your lap. Kyle Wayne. That's one of the good things about getting drunk is you remember fucking old Kyle Wayne.

I have a picture of him. That's the name of the guy? Yeah, I think it's actually the picture. That would be hard'd watch his documentary. I mean, Doug, to be fair, his concerns were valid. That hotel, it feels like a tinderbox. It's got like, all the doors are smaller because people were smaller back when they built it kind of thing.

But it seems like a different concern than having, because the cruise ship, the complaint is you keep running into the audience over and over. And one, one of the times he ran into the audience, they threw his fucking, his fucking prop into the water. Why did he bring it to breakfast? That's what I want to know.

It has nothing to do with you being burned to death later in your life. Yeah. Was he roasting marshmallows in there? What's this guy's deal? I'm sorry if the show is different from last night. Instead of Grumpet, my puppet, Grumpet!

Because someone threw Mr. Grumpet overboard. So tonight it's Mr. Dress Sock. I can't believe you're worried about having material for when you get out of copa doug yeah you got grumpet man doug and grumpet don't be like the doug and he moo he moo he moo and doug i swear to god and fucking after just seeing that trending on, I was going to say MySpace.

Yeah. On Twitter. Oh, yeah. MySpace is trending on it. On Imgur. Yeah, just seeing, oh, yeah, 25% of the population has been vaccinated and you can be in a room without a mask. Oh, fuck. We're going to have full rooms.

That was my last excuse. I'm not going to do fucking shows where people are separated. Oh, fuck. Now they're not going to have to be separated. I'm doing my show for seven white assholes. Also, Doug, you've been performing in rooms filled with people with a lot of communicable diseases.

I don't know what is new. Yeah, no, I'm not worried about me. I'm worried about fucking everything. COVID has destroyed specifically comedy. Like everything about it no comedy exists because people are crammed together in a tight room that's how comedy works that's why fucking zoom shows have you done a zoom show mr talent uh Talent? Not in 11 months, no. I did one at the beginning and was like,

well, this is the opposite of everything I've been devoting my life to. You know who's going to save comedy is Doug and Grumpet. Joe Rogan's going to give a platform for Doug and Grumpet. You know, Doug, we'd love to have you on, but we're just going to have a Grumpet-heavy episode. Grumpet's been used in a lot of white supremacy ads, Doug, we'd love to have you on, but we're just going to have a Grumpet-heavy episode. Grumpet's been used in a lot of white supremacy ads, Doug. How do you feel about working with Grumpet now? There is a guy who does stand-up who has a dummy that's a white supremacist.

It's a puppet. And he was opening for me in Davenport, Iowa. And it was so bad that I had to leave the room because I was having a panic attack. And I go outside and I thought my buddy Donnie Townsend's out there. I'm like, Donnie, will you go on and do a set after this guy? I can't handle it. And Donnie's like, sure. So Donnie walks on after the guy gets

not one laugh for 15 minutes. And Donnie gets up and says, hey, let's get that puppet back up here. Totally saved the show. And Donnie had already done 10 minutes on the show. I was like, Donnie, you got to go back up, man. I can't handle this right now. Donnie Townsend?

Yeah, you know Donnie. Yeah, I know Donnie. Yeah, he looks like the Native American Indian in Young Guns. For sure. I forget his name. He's a total grumpet. Yeah, definitely a nice change of pace. Lou Diamond Phillips?

Yeah, as you say, the Mexican. Yeah, Lou Diamond Phillips. Yep. He's Mexican, not Indian. I know. He's timeless. Donnie's opening for me. He's my go-to opener in the Midwest.

He's the most fun. Yeah, I like Don. Well, he'll go up no matter what. That's for sure. He'd never seen me so shook. He was like, what's the matter, big cat? And I'm like, Donnie, the guy's got a white supremacist puppet. He's eating his ass.

I don't know what to do. And he's like, I got you. Don't worry, big guy. Hey, let's get that puppet back up here. Give it up for the puppet. Drifting off in a fucking dreams of a documentary about all those guys

Captain Rowdy yeah you could do one I mean John Fox doesn't deserve his own but he definitely fit into a little side note Rodgerson what about Jay Medicine Hat? You guys ever work with Jay Medicine Hat?

I replaced him once. He was supposed to be in Boise, Idaho, and he didn't show up. And all the chairs, so I got the headline, and all the chairs were still up there. And my opener was, so your headliner couldn't get here. He started coming here tonight, and then they hit him with a flashing light, and he started to get very sleepy. Wait, Jay Medicine had, for the listener. Yeah, he was an R-rated hypnotist actor.

Yeah. Yeah, so we had to tell him. Danny, that part goes before you tell the second part. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, not everybody was aware of Jay Medicine had, or his drinking problem and his inability to make it to gigs sometimes. I like how you said everyone was a Medicine Hat head listening to this. And really, you know, that was my first chance to headline a club.

And I was there with an audience full of people that were waiting for a ventriloquist act. So it worked out pretty good. I had a good 15 minutes. Jay Medicine Hat used to be a comic named something else and then reinvented himself as a hypnotist act. Yeah, he was Jay Chinaman Hat for a while there.

Then he was Jay the Beret when he was doing one letter. Oh, he did that little stint where he was Jay Hard Hat. That's right, yeah. Don't worry. don't worry tracy is uh oh shit there's some comics like you meet and that maybe don't last long but there's a guy who when i first started his name jay webb nobody ever knew who he really was and he did really shitty fucking old school impressions uh so he was real forgettable but it was like nobody knew who he really was and then he disappeared from the scene but that that's the way to ease into comedy you know don't tell anybody create a fucking

weird identity and flame out somewhere nearby your place the the name sounds is. Is Tracy looking up Jay Medicine Hat? No. She's crocheting Listen, you have your computer at line and he's looking at

his phone, but is he still alive? I don't think so. I don't think he is. I don't think he's alive the first thing it comes yeah the situation that happened he was in a car crash is why i replaced him so then it was like lisa was like uh you know he was in a car crash i was like okay i won't bring that up again then because i said he was kind of he was asleep at the wheel basically i implied by you

know he hypnotized himself on the way to the gig. Are you talking about Lisa from Idle Fun of Them? Yeah, and the chairs not being on the stage, you know, so of course I'm not going to acknowledge it again. He was like the first guy I featured for. Yeah, he bounced back, but I don't think that far.

Boy, all in with that outfit. He brought a little bow and arrow on stage. Yeah, and I think he was Sicilian. Looking up J-Men. I love those guys who were with the over-the-top headshots back in the day, like the machine gun, a couple of babes, a couple of twin falls babes on their arm.

That club that, Doug, you and I were on tour, and I think it was in Greeley, and it was in the basement? Down Under. Down Under. That place had the most incredible headshots from, like, the late

70s to all of the 80s and i mean they the club was basically built in the 80s and it never got out of them but is that where you got andy's headshot you spoke of earlier no that's the first time i ever opened for dog where he didn't remember me and i was very nervous uh no uh andy's headshot was from looney's, I think, down in the Springs. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I did have a doll. I won at the carnival. And then I did do a puppet act, and then I acted like I was having Woody Allen love with it. I don't think Larry knew what I was about.

All those club headshots always have something very cryptic inside joke written on them. It's like, hey, to Larry, everything is all too much sometimes. Signed, Andy Andrus. What the fuck happened? What existential crisis did you go through? Andy. Yeah. you go through now?

Andy. Yeah. I remember when we worked at Looney's in Colorado. There was another time you... When I say Andy steps on my dick, he just first.

The Endeavor? Was it Endeavor? It was a fucking space shuttle crash on the way to the club and i'm like fucking andy's gonna get to all the fucking current events shit that's why the weather hang on there's there's comics depending on your act, where you go, okay, Junior Stopka, for instance, is just going to do Junior Stopka. He's not going to fucking have, oh, this just happened today. I get to step on the fucking elephant in the room. the fucking elephant in the room. And I remember some kind of space shuttle

crash on our way to the gig. It was breaking news. And I'm like, motherfucker. I want to make Andy headlines so I get to do all the current events shit. You remember what I said?

It was something about, there was a couple of inches of snow fell when they're expecting several more feet to drop. Something like that. Yeah, it was basically the game. Apparently, I have that problem. What was the Sam Talent? you're good with facts. The space shuttle... Not Endeavor.

No. Columbia? It was the one that blew up on launch, I think. I thought that was the Challenger explosion. That was Challenger that blew up. That was in the 80s. We'll never forget. We'll never forget. I remember

the punchline. All those brave heroes. The fucking ladies, space teacher lady. Yeah, that was the challenger. I remember the punchline before comedy was even in my fucking radar. Oh, they're vacationing

over parts of Florida. That was the point. Yeah, I get that. Tragedy just comes out right away. I don't do that waiting. And sometimes it's a bummer. Erickson pointed out one where we were working together. And it was in Montana.

And there was a Christian camp that had a collapse of some sort but a lot of Christian kids got rolled and some smashed and I was doing like I think it was a balcony that collapsed Andy yeah didn't a balcony collapse yeah something like that you know it wasn't the camp ended in a bummer and I was right there to talk about it and uh somebody went out and got Erickson said you, you better go get him. He's been doing 15 minutes on the balcony collapse. Man, trying to find the beats of the funny here.

I like how you described that as a bummer. That was recently, though. Andy, wasn't that, that was like the last tour you guys did? No, it was a few years ago. I've grown up some since then. I think COVID's made us all examine ourselves a little more closely. Yeah, and work on our crossover.

Yeah. Do some plugs. All right. Sam Talent, you can get in touch with him on Twitter at Talent, T-A-L-L-E-N-T, Sam. Running the Light is available on Audible. Congratulations. On March 16th. Get on there.

Everyone's got Audible. Just grab the book, man. Yeah. Pre-order is available right now, too. So you can get it. Oh, pre-order. That's great. Also, you can get the...

Really remind people that we have... There's 13 chapters. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I read a chapter and, you know, Kreischer. Who reads number one? That was Kreischer because it was the shortest chapter and he was doing the, and then I gave Doug the longest chapter.

Oh, yeah. You know, Doug, you've been so good. And I really appreciate all the help you've given. Also, hey, Fort Collins this weekend at the Comedy Fort, Three's Comedy Club. I've never forgotten where I was trying to read

Gallop. Oh, yeah. Ever since then, it's a running joke in our family where I say, go off. I'm going to go off. Yeah, you were furious. Actually, Tracy just pulled it up right here.

Tracy and I both... Oh, fuck, it's not showing up. Tracy and I both get credit on the narrated by... Yeah, and you guys got top billing. I don't know why you have top billing, but... I know. Obviously, alphabetic.

Definitely alphabetic. Also, I do want to mention, Shane, you're doing a thing. This is coming out on the 15th, so the gig you just promoted will already have been over. You're working with Shane Gillis and friends at the Helium in Philly on the 16th yeah that that's sold out already if i can plug colorado

springs three's comedy club next weekend uh need some help down there it's an urban room and it'll be very strange so come on out and see me figure it out uh you can get all of this at samtalent.com also sam has a wonderful podcast with his buddy nathan lund at chubby behemoth and it's available on uh itunes it's a real galop it's a fun time it's a real galop i hate nathan lund i loved it fucking uh all right i i have no joke there. I don't. I'm drunk. I'm going to go fall down while daylight is happening. Andy, you got any words? Issues with Andy. And I have a comedy special that's going to do another lap around, circling around the area.

It's going to be out eventually. But just we appreciate your patience. And thanks for flying with us. We know you have a lot of other options. I saw that it's produced by the legend Chris Castles. That's a pretty good hit. Well, it's more importantly, Doug Stanhope opened his house

up and Paul Preventa directed it. I used Chris Castles as an example of a thing. That's all I'll say. All right, then. Let's leave it nebulous. Let's just leave it hanging there.

Nice to see you, Sam. Oh, man. What a pleasure. Thanks, guys. Doug, do our sign-off. Crazy. No, no. Let's get Sam Talent's wife in the room. She's at work. She's a doctor.

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