The Doug Stanhope Podcast - Ep.#501: "Mt. Saint Stanhope"

Episode Date: September 7, 2022

Recording from the road, Stanhope catches up with Kathryn Bertine (Athlete, Author, Activist, Filmmaker, Former Pro Cyclist & ESPN Columnist) about her 50 State #Highpoint journey with her father. Recorded Sep. 1st, 2022 on the road in Albany, NY with Doug Stanhope (@dougstanhope), Kathryn Bertine (@KathrynBertine), Adrian, Tracey (@egglester), and Ggreg Chaille (@gregchaille). Produced and Edited by Chaille. Doug's new book, "No Encore For The Donkey" available exclusively at Audible.com - https://amzn.to/31uwvO0 We have no idea what the future holds so get on the Mailing List at https://www.dougstanhope.com/. When we know, we'll let you know. LINKS - Helix Sleep - Find your perfect mattress at HelixSleep.com/stanhope - Helix is offering UP TO $200 off all mattress orders AND two free pillows for our listeners. Find your perfect mattress at HelixSleep.com/stanhope. BetterHelp.com - Get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at BetterHELP.com/stanhope. DraftKings.com - Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app NOW and use promo code STANHOPE to get TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS in FREE bets INSTANTLY when you place a five-dollar bet this Sunday! That’s code STANHOPE—only at DraftKings Sportsbook—an Official Sports Betting Partner of the NFL. Minimum age and eligibility restrictions apply.  If you or someone you know has a gambling problem, crisis counseling and referral services can be accessed by calling 1-800-GAMBLER (1-800-426-2537) (IL/IN/LA/MI/NJ/PA/WV/WY), 1-800-NEXT STEP (AZ), 1-800-522-4700 (CO/NH), 888-789-7777/visit http://ccpg.org/chat (CT), 1-800-BETS OFF (IA), 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY), visit OPGR.org (OR), call/text TN REDLINE 1-800-889-9789 (TN), or 1-888-532-3500 (VA). 21+ (18+ NH/WY). Physically present in AZ/CO/CT/IL/IN/IA/LA(select parishes)/MI/NH/NJ/ NY/OR/PA/TN/VA/WV/WY only. New customer offer void in NH/OR/ONT-CA. $200 in Free bets: New customers only. Valid 1 per new customer. Min. $5 deposit. Min $5 wager. $200 issued as eight (8) $25 free bets. Ends 9/19/22 @ 8pm. Early Win: 1 Early Win Token issued per eligible game. Opt in req. Token expires at start of eligible game. Min moneyline bet $1. Wagering limits apply. Wagers placed on both sides of moneyline will void bet. Ends 1/8/23 @ 8pm ET. See terms at sportsbook dot draftkings dot com slash football terms. Visit the Stanhope Store - http://www.dougstanhope.com/store/ Closing song, “The Stanhope Rag”, written and performed by Scotty Conant for Doug Stanhope and used with permission – Available on Soundcloud - https://soundcloud.com/scottyconant Photo Credit - EgglesterSupport the show: http://www.Patreon.com/stanhopepodcast

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You're listening to the Doug Stanhope Podcast. You can start. Go. Oh. Hey, it's the Doug Stanano podcast. We're in a giant cavernous hotel lobby. I can't shit on the hotel because it's a club hookup. But we're in Albany.

And we have Adrian LeBlanc. Have we actually had Adrian on a podcast or just talked about her behind her back? Adrian, you've been on at least one. No. She wrote an article in Harper's about us in 2014. 2014, she was embedded on the road with me and Junior Stopka and Carlos Valencia and assorted other members of the crew. Back when we used to rent a roadside construction van, those vans that people on work release work out of in orange vest and picking up litter off the side of the road. With bench seats. Yeah, before we just decided

let's just buy our own fucking van. So you can find that. And Catherine Bertine who you remember from that one time I tried to get healthy it's so good to be back and we have health coming our way tomorrow oh yeah we're gonna do a uh a hike we could get into that chaley and tracy are here we just did

a show in albany we're in albany, New York in a mall. Yeah, but this, it's a lobby but it's an extended giant stupid lobby that had the fucking worst children. Yeah, I'll just go ahead. We were

here early and I've been working out material, writing down my bits in lobbies because I want to be close to smoking. When I write, I smoke, and I want to be right close to the door to go out and smoke. So this is a giant lobby. It's great. And they had the fucking children of the corn in here. From the minute we checked in for hours and one of them is

going to be a school shooter. And I had no idea. I've never been that bothered by one child. He was the children of the corn. Malachi. He was the Malachi of children of the corn. Malachi. He was the Malachi of children of the corn. Malachi was the...

The big redhead guy. He wasn't the leader. I love that movie. Jacky Earl Haley. He scared the shit out of me. Jacky Earl Haley. This kid. Jacky Earl Haley? Jacky Earl Haley. Wasn't he on Bad News Bears?

Yes. That isn't Malachi. Wait, is he the one that was riding the dirt bike? The bad kid? Yeah, that's not Malachi. No. Oh, it's not Malachi? She's fact-checking.

But that kid, hang on, the kid from Bad News Bears was also in Tropic, not Tropic Thunder. was also in Tropic, not Tropic Thunder, what's the basketball movie with Will Ferrell? Where the Flint Tropics

has an ABA team and they give away a giant check for $1,000 to this fucking meth head. Basically is what he's playing. And he keeps going, I can't cash this at the bank.

And you go, what is that actor? Where did they find him? He's the dirt bike guy. Jackie Earl. Jackie Earl Haley. Courtney Gaines is Malachi. Yes. But isn't Jackie Earl Haley. Courtney Gaines is Malachi. Yes. But isn't Jackie

Earle Haley in Children of the Corn? She's told me as a child of the corn. Anyway. It just went from comedy night to trivia night. That's what they usually do on Thursdays here in Albany.

It's trivia. Linda Hamilton. Oh, Linda Hamilton. She played opposite Michael Bean in The Terminator. Have you ever seen The Terminator or The Abyss or Aliens 2 or The Rock?

Michael Bean, from all of those, is our friend. Now he lives in Bisbee. And he's our good friend. We hang out. She's never seen any one of those fucking movies. What? She actually demurred tonight

at dinner when you go, oh, you don't know Emo Phillips or Judy Tanuta and someone who's been working on a book about stand-up comedy. You don't know who those people are, for real? She changed the subject.

She changed the subject immediately. I watched you. I know you heard Dirty Liar. I have no shame about admitting what I don't know, which is pretty much everything. We walked down the hallway of all those pictures of the comics, and I'm like, I don't know who most

people are. Got a couple? You know four and that's all that matters. But you didn't know who Judy Tenet is? No, I knew the name, but I associated with her. She thought it was the Karate Kid, which she's never

seen. Wow. She was up for that part. Wow. I love that. I'm joking. She was up for that part. They went with the male. I just so confidently gave you the wrong person in the film. And I'm here to ruin any confidence or fun. I hate the fact that Chaley doesn't have headphones on.

Can they... Is the audio working? Yeah. Because you've never used these microphones. I reported you today. And I did a lot of testing in the room. Yeah, you don't have to. Well, check her when she talks.

Adrian's staying far away from us because Adrian, I keep wondering, because Adrian's even asking me, what's the country like now? And I've been thinking, I bet there's probably still people that are in their own quarantine isolation because of, and Adrian's had her COVID. She lost a lot of people to it. She has not really left until today. She ventured out from states away, wearing a mask occasionally.

I haven't really left my tiny little shire in the New England parts of the country till today. I'm like, wow, I've been thinking for a year, are there still people that are... Yeah, she has been. And she's nervous.

Like the Japanese soldier on the island. Okay, like Doug wishes he'd been doing that. Actually, one of my first bits, when I started a year ago, after 18 months of quarantine in Flagstaff, I had just

a million ideas, but and one of them was about, because I had just read a book about one of these last soldiers, Japanese soldiers, that didn't believe the war had ended. That in the Philippines for, what, 20 years or something? Almost 30 years.

30 years? Ichi, goddammit, I can't remember his name. The point of the bit was I would be that guy with quarantine. Like, I loved quarantine so much. I would not believe that it was over. Just, they were dropping pamphlets over there. He was in the Philippines for decades. And they knew he was there.

And the Japanese government would fly planes they brought his wife out and his brother out and just doing loudspeaker the war is over please come home and he's like he wrote the book and he's like i thought how clever of them to have someone who can do an impression of my brother so well. It was one of the most brilliant books you asked about. But he wasn't, he was totally like of sound mind. He just didn't know the war was over. He was not going to surrender. He believed the mainstream media is what he did.

You know, he believed that, well, because Japanese soldiers were trained that to the last citizen we will die before we surrender. So, well, Japan would never surrender when they're saying Japan surrendered. Oh, this is propaganda. This is bullshit. Yeah. Don't follow the mob. And he liked being alone. He actually had some buddies for a couple years.

Two other guys. And I don't know what happened to them. Oh, wow. You remember? Yeah. And I remember there were farmers that would spot him every once in a while. And I think he got a couple cows every once in a while. Yeah.

Yeah, but mostly he's living off the job. It's one of the most brilliant books I've ever read, and I can't remember the title. You were asking Tracy earlier. What's the book? Paradise Lost. That's it. That's it.

Keeper. That book. Which I thought was the documentary about the West Memphis Three, Paradise Lost. I didn't watch the Terminator. Oh, I'm so sorry. Were you ever a child? I don't even understand Paradise Lost. I'm not pretending I do, but...

No, but I'm saying... What did you watch when you were a teenager? Movies. Sixteen Candles, Breakfast Club, Terminator. Not the Terminator. Sixteen Candles, The Breakfast Club. More Don Hughes than Cameron.

Cameron. Yeah, I can't remember his real name. I snuck in to see Saturday Night Fever. That was a big... Oh boy. I think you're three or four years older than me. No way. Are you older than me? Yeah, I am older.

Yeah, really? You're older than him? Yeah. She goes, how old are you? Because she takes notes. And at 55, now Chaley and I can get senior discounts at Goodwill and IHOP Senior Breakfast. Senior Sampler.

After 55? At 55. You could probably do it at 50. Chaley did it, or no could probably do it at 50 Shaley did it or no Doug did it at 54 no at 54 like a month or so point being I know that you're

older than me I remember didn't I just say 57 yeah forget my point all day we've been Didn't I just say 57%? Yeah. Forget my point. You're talking about the children of the corn kid. All day we've been talking about references that she doesn't get

any references. Yes, this is how it goes. Yeah, it's just talking. It's just us talking. Do you want closure at the end? It's fly on the wall. Tracy takes pictures once in a while. Thank you.

What's the movie that you never saw that people say, wait, you never saw that? Mine's E.T. Mine too. Is that right? That was one of my favorite.

Star Wars. That's right? I thought E.T. That was one of my favorites. I'm Star Wars. Star Wars. That's a Hennegan. I knew you were going to be one of those. Hennegan has seen Star Wars. And he's proud of it. So what about you two? They didn't have...

You're E.T. also? Why are you thinking... Because I have an interest in this. I never saw The Sound of Music, but I spent three months in Austria. Take your time. We'll talk about it later. Is that why you didn't see it? No, I just didn't think to watch it

before I went. There's a tell-all book called Sound of Music based on a person whose whatever family was based on. Yeah. It was like the real story. I know that from Crossroads.

Okay, so I have the movie, but the thing is, I just watched it this past year, but it had been the movie that I hadn't seen forever, and it was The Matrix. Oh, I just re-watched that and still didn't... No, I didn't like it when I saw

it the first time. It didn't grab my soul, but I get why people love it. I get the point, but I didn't get the point. I want to know Tracy's movie. Have you ever seen it? While she thinks, I'll tell you. Every movie before Midnight Cowboy is the earliest movie that I remember liking.

But everything that Chaley watches on TMC or AMC or whatever that fucking... TCM, Turner Classic. I don't like old movies. They're fucking awful to me. So everything, oh, you've never seen Gone with the Wind or whatever? No. Why would you?

Were you at Vaudeville? No, I never went to Vaudeville either. Why would you watch black and white movies? They suck. They're great. No, they fucking suck. Yeah. I'll make a, as you think.

I will make an analogy. Soccer. Soccer is fucking boring as shit. When you listen to soccer on radio, when we did that seven-week UK tour, the driver would listen to it.

The announcers make it sound like hockey. Oh, and he kicks it off the hip, and he kicks it back the hip. And you go, oh, this must be exciting. But if you are watching what he's talking about, it's a guy just kicking a ball, a guy kicking a ball. This is the difference because Chaley, the only time he puts on something I enjoy in the car on the radio

is radio classics. So, an old movie sucks, but old radio doing, and this must be you, you're a sister. The Whistler. That's funny. It's almost cartooning old movies that I would never watch.

It's the golden age of radio. That's a whole different category than sports. Like, that's an actual program. I'm saying the difference between watching and listening. Baseball is boring as fuck. Listening to baseball is soothing. I value your

opinions. I'm glad you have opinions. They're wrong, but I like them. That you have opinions. Yeah. They're wrong, but I like them. That you have them. Yeah, exactly. Go ahead, make it about ladies. No, I wasn't even going to do that.

I was going to keep it too sports specific. Like if you're not a fan of soccer, you're not a fan of soccer. But for those who are, I think it's interesting to listen to. I'm saying the UK announcers for World Cup is when it started. When we listened to World Cup 2014, I became a soccer fan to the point where I can now watch it and appreciate it. But it's because the radio announcers make it seem so electrifying. Their commentary is what captivates Doug, whereas watching it on TV, he just tunes out.

I did tune out, but because they brought me into it. Radio classics where it wore the world's shit. Back when people were tuning in to an AM transistor radio as a family. Did you do that tonight? What are you doing?

School closers. I remember. I always What are you doing? School closures. Oh, yeah. School closures. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I remember. I always love when you go, burn, coach. I always love that name. That's where my dad taught. Oh, really?

He was a science teacher, biology teacher. That's where he raped my mother. Oh. Well. It's in the book, but you don't remember any part of it. I do remember that. Statue of Limitations. Yeah.

I don't remember that being a burn. When I did the research for my book. Exactly. It was not. When my dad was my mother's teacher, she was his student at Burncoat Senior High School, biology class, and he was 36 and she was 18 when they hooked up but then when I was writing my first book digging up mother I found letters from my mother to my grandmother back and forth where oh no she was 17 and he was 35 so yes he was a rapist as he was a child rapist and the nicest guy anyone's ever met and i said that i think he only had sex twice

me and my brother uh and everyone listening right now if you do a little bit of your lineage, you're going to find what would now be considered a pedophile. Oh, he came back from World War I, and he was 23, and he married his second cousin who was 14. And that's where you came from. And that's what I stumbled on because I wanted to riff on tonight. And I think I did that on an old special. I hinted at it. You're an adult when you can have children. Every animal is an adult once you're able to breed

if you want your fucking kid teach your kid don't fuck I'm saying you don't teach your kids about fucking until they're way past the age they should know about fucking because they want to fuck

instead of warning them before it happens. I never wanted to fuck more than before it was legal for me to fuck things. Oh no, you do that when you're married and you're an adult. But I'm going to

fuck a sushi roll right now. I'm 13. Yeah. You can't roll over in bed. Not fast. Which is completely just having any kind of point of view about that. Oh, what are you, like some pedophile? No, you're kids.

That's why fucking you have all these kids that you can't afford because you're having them before you can afford to see where I'm going I think you didn't do that tonight though right I started to I had to catch myself I can't even remember the material

I'm supposed to be doing why the fuck yeah that was yeah that was interesting because it kind of goes with some of the other stuff. But when you say, do you see where I'm going? Do you see where he's going? Because I don't see where he's going.

I'm listening for things that connect with some of the other things. Casey pays way more close attention to me because I'm usually running around doing things. But it is one of those things where, like I was telling you, we'll find things that are different a little bit. And then if it stands out, we'll write it down and then tell him. And then this is the thing where he's working on something that he shouldn't probably be working on at that point. He's still trying to stitch together other things.

But it really stood out. I mean, I do it anyway. of stitch together other things but it really stood out that it was really cool i mean i do it like the way that it goes in i i do it anyway generally i do like unstoppable director's commentary when i'm on stage right okay you know you're just fucking pleasing yourself stanhope go to the thing that you wrote today i say that out loud generally, but now specifically because I am trying to make this shit work for two different things. Let me get back to this. We get a break for it.

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Bertine, I remember, if you guys don't remember Catherine Bertine, I was in 2019. I house sat and did some yogas and bike rides and shit. But I just remembered, right here where we are in Albany. That is not how you say it. I say it like that. That's out of spite. Wait, is it the tone or the way he's pronouncing it? It's Albany, not Albany.

I know, but I'm saying it out of spite. I just want to make sure. At least I don't have whiskey. The fucking crowd. The crowd was fine. The staff tonight was fantastic. And I'm not going to talk shit about specific staffs, but there's been a few nights.

This tour started so gangbusters, and I don't know why that's what queered me, was the Summit Comedy Club, Fort Wayne. Summit City. They just were so outstanding. And everyone, at fucking Hilarities in Cleveland, it was so outstanding. I don't know if I'm being

paranoid. There was a few places we played. Do you just hate me for making you work? And we're over the top take care of the waitstaff.

The same way I do the Griffin scale. Like, what do you expect? Burt Kreischer every time? Burt Kreischer's a comic that does, like, all, like, his big thing is doing, like, lotteries for the staff. Or he used to. I don't know if he still does it. The point is, like, I don't know if I'm let down because

of the contrast between the first week and the second week or do you just fucking hate me? I'm walking out saying, hey, thank you guys very much and you look up and then look back at your fucking paperwork and don't nod. And then I think I suck.

Tonight was fucking great. They were great. Back to fucking great in Albany. I don't know why I'm saying like. Now I'm doing it to annoy you. Oh, you were always. Never, never let him see you sweat. If he figures it out, then that's the way it's going to go.

So, so Catherine, if you remember from 2019, 12-mile bike ride, doing yoga. I house sat for her when she was up here. You put on bike shorts for the first time? In the summer, she goes to camp up in the fucking Adirondacks. Oh, my God. I remember a picture. She put me in a... She got me a...

Your sponsor, a cycling suit. Yep. What do they call that? It's a cycling kit. Kit, kit, kit. The chamois shorts and the jersey from Trek Bicycles. Yep, that's right. Yep.

Yep. And took a picture of me with my giant bloated head and my tiny body. Like fucking E.T. which I've never seen. I disagree. You looked fabulous. I remember seeing, I can picture the picture in my head that I tweeted

or no, you tweeted. You had to tweet everything back then. I can't, we just have a fucking nice time. I did tweet a lot, but you know what? You also retweeted. Yeah, I know. You went to the trouble. You kind of leaned on me.

Oh. Kazmin Bertine is what, what. I'll send it a little. Hang on. A little? Because right now, Hannigan is leaning on me. Oh, but this will help promote, because the physical copy of No Encore is just going out,

and it's getting some heat. In ways I go, I don't want to be fucking people thinking this book is about, oh, Johnny Depp and me. Johnny Depp was integral to that year that the book is about. It's a year in your life. But now it just got some fucking heat today from the daily mail. That'll blow over. And he's like,

Oh, we should capitalize on this, which is his job. But, Oh, and then he just like name drops things that are in the book. Cause that will sell tickets, but I don't want to fucking sell tickets that way.

It sounds, you know, but that's why we don't have a publicist. And I don't know how... It's based into Hennigan. It's not going to change. Yeah, I know. I thought it was fun that your followers loved seeing you

in a different light, being exercise. They seem to enjoy that. And, you know, most... But I knew it was going to be short-lived. You didn't. You thought you were Dick Gregory getting the fat guy out of the house. Nobody that listens to podcasts would get that reference. You get the reference.

Adrienne gets the reference, but she doesn't listen to podcasts. I listen to Dick Gregory. I read all the stuff he did. I just watched a documentary. It kills me that I didn't talk to him. Yeah. It kills me that I didn't talk to him when he was alive.

Wait, you had a chance to talk to Dick Gregory and didn't? 20 years, right? I mean, he died a few years ago. Yeah, it hasn't been a long, long time. But he was around and doing stand-up at the end again. He was going back out after. I didn't know a lot about his life, but I knew about him. Anyway, that's another story. I know the reference.

I don't know the reference. Anyway, so... Actually, there's an interesting parallel here. I think one of the things, Dick Gregory was a comedian, and was one of the first

African-American comics to break the color barrier in a club. He played with a club in Chicago, and that was a huge thing. And he was really on a... Like, very famous. And he

walked away from his fame. And he became an act... He became very involved in the civil rights movement. He was a very spiritually... Like, you know... He was a very spiritual person, but he really was on, it's like

the equivalent of, you know, he really walked away from a massive career with a lot of money and fame and really became deeply involved in the civil rights movement. And then he went on and had all these other iterations. I found it, because I knew about deeply involved in the civil rights movement. And then he went on and had all these other iterations. I

found it, because I knew about Dick Gregory at a point where I'm like trying to the historians, like Norton, Jim Norton, like knows all the history of comedy. And I was never a guy I don't know shit.

I knew Andrew Desclay is the history of my comedy so I found a Dick Gregory CD that had come out obviously a reissue

it wasn't an original that's why I thought it would be an album from whenever it was, had to be after he went through the civil rights. And then he was doing this phone-in set where he just like, yeah, you just say, it was like an open mic. I'm lazy. Never really get to a point CD where he goes,

well, now I'm Dick Gregory, I can just say whatever. Is that the parallel? No, she had a parallel. I just interrupted her because she stopped talking and put her mask back on. But as I started to talk, I realized I can't bring the two things into alignment right now. That's why it takes me so long. You've been drinking Niagara spring water. I know.

Which is the best water. Just drink the nice water. They have the best water up here, Dee. That's right. Oh, my gosh. My mom lives not far from here now. This is a call. Weren't you there in that conversation? I'm setting up something here. I'm not

catching it. We were talking about when I took care of her mother with dementia during 2019. We smoked ferociously with her. Oh, it's one of my favorite photos. If you remember, I had to bring her

food. I was trying to go through the list of all the things because tomorrow in the morning, I bet I can come up with more shit when my head's not clogged. The biggest thing was Dr. Pepper.

Her mother with dementia. I was taking care of that summer. And she would drink a six-pack of Dr. Pepper. I would bring cases every time I had to bring her supplies with her dementia. So did Mike Ness from The Social Distortion when he was kicking heroin. Is that right? Dr. Pepper specifically?

Dr. Pepper. A lot in common. Yeah, that was her go-to beverage. Was she kicking heroin? It's possible. She chain smoked. I forget what's her cigarette. True Blue.

Wait, no, they didn't have those anymore. It was Marlboro 100s. Reds 100s. 100s though. And because of the dementia, the chain smoking, she'd forget that she just had one. So she was north of two packs a day. That was the only

benefit, because I'd go over every couple of days and check her fridge. What do you need? And then I'd check her fridge because she would have maybe stacks of rotten ones of those. Right. It was fun. You were amazing. I mean, it was incredible what you did for two reasons. One, my mom thought throughout the whole summer that you were her handyman

because you kept wearing the shirt that says Doug. Actually, if anyone listens to the podcast, religiously at least, when I'm not working and I'm not wearing a suit, religiously, at least, when I'm not working, and I'm not wearing a suit, generally I have that blue worker's shirt on at home that says Doug on it.

It's like a workman's shirt. And I was wearing that, and she's like, Doug, what are you, the handyman? And from the minute I met her, she thought I was the handyman. Because I always wear that shirt. It's summer in Arizona. I wear the same fucking

shorts or pajamas. And I wear the same... Yeah, and you'd walk in and she would say things like, can you take down the fan? Can you fix the window? She was so angry about the fan. She didn't like ceiling fans. No, I don't like it.

Oh, I forgot about that. Yeah. Her mother would, every day, this is the whole summer, she would take me through and show me pictures of her daughter. This is my daughter, Catherine. She used to be a skater. Yeah. Catherine. She used to be a skater.

And then one time early on, I go, yeah, that's how I know you. You know Catherine? And then I realized, just shut the fuck up. Just be Doug the Workman. Yeah. She's got dementia. Let her, every time I

come over, show me the tour of pictures. But she was, oh, like Dave Rader from Yonkers. Make connections. But not Yonkers, right next door that it should have been called something. Oh, yes, Bronxville is where we live. Something snotty. Right.

Oh, she was very upset that we had moved to an area in Bronxville that had shared the post office code with Yonkers. And that was not acceptable to her. She needed it to always be just Bronxville. And she had this spectacular house. And she'd show me pictures of the house. Oh my God, that's so embarrassing. And the spiral staircase. Like every day you get this tour.

Oh, every day. One version or another. No wonder the fan never got changed she'd change up material occasionally but the structure was still there so the Dr. Pepper part which is fascinating

now so now my mom is in my brother's chair Dr. Pepper and cigarettes and after my dad passed my brother stepped up to the plate. Because we had two options, basically. Either we would have to put my mom... Way to bury the lead.

Your dad dies at the end of this podcast. Oh, man. I know. We have no idea where we're going. No. Well, he shall be resurrected shortly. We'll get to that. But, yeah.

So what were your two options? The two options were that either my mom would go into a home or, actually we thought at the time that was the only option, and then my brother kind of stepped up to the plate and said, listen, I just bought... The third option was

because you come up here to upstate New York to go to camp up in the Adirondacks with your dad every summer. And then I agreed to house it for you and watch your mother. So the third option was, Dad, let's just not go back. Leave Stanhope and ditch him. Okay, so that's the most important part though, before we even get to where my mom is

now, the fact that you took care of my mom for that summer, which would end up being my dad's last summer, you gave him the most incredible gift, which was for two months to not have to constantly every day, take care of my mom and to really have a summer to himself because he had been, you know, taking care of her basically for what, at that point, 55 years. She was not an easy person. And she was not. For me, it was funny, but like my mother, yeah, she's funny to other people, but to me, oh, this is a fucking problem.

Oh, very difficult. Exactly. And you gave my dad the most incredible gift. I loved your dad. Oh. You gave my dad the most incredible gift. I loved your dad. I said that about my dad and everyone says,

oh, they were the best person. My dad really was the best person. And my mother was kind of a cunt. Your dad was as good as my dad. Thank you. Thank you. Did you see that while you were doing it? Oh, yeah, from this minute.

Yeah. We were at Sushi right when they were about to leave. No, it was the Mexican place. Okay. Oh, gosh, yeah. We were about to leave to go, and they're having a really, who's going to take care of D, her mother? who's going to take care of D, her mother?

And he's saying, well, that nice girl at the pharmacy, it wasn't St. Louis. Walgreens. Walgreens is across the street. I know. I think I could ask her, like anyone else, you'd think, are you passive aggressively asking if I she lives across the street

to bring her groceries a couple days a week and check in I'm like I can do that and I remember him very fragile and physically active but still fragile and old he wasn't like a Joe Biden.

He could still move around at that age. And he's like, would you really do that? I'm bringing the gift of fucking Christmas, which I'm really happy to. I'm just going to be sitting here

anyway, working on a book. Oh my God. From that moment on, my father referred to you as St. Stanhope. Boy. For the rest of his life. Because of the S-T part. Yeah. S-T-A-N-H-O-P.

Yeah, that's right. No, I love that. That's so true. And I do have to tell you that it was a pretty incredible story, too. You know, my dad insisted, too. He's like, I'm going to give you money to buy my mom the cigarettes and Dr. Pepper. And you being your generous self, you were like, no, no, no. I got this.

I got this. And so my dad put in an envelope, which he marked St. Stanhope. He put, you know, $100 bills, probably like, I don't know, $700 or something. You would not accept that, right? You wouldn't accept it. So here's the thing. So that envelope was tucked away. And as we're, you know, cleaning up, you know, after he passed,

my brother finds this and he comes into the room. He's like, who is? Well, first he says, did dad find religion? And I was like, oh, this is great. And I was like, well, he's always gone to church occasionally, down the street. Christmas, Easter. Yeah, and I said, no. And he says, well, I just found this

in a drawer. And he pulls out this envelope of like $700. He's like, well, who's St. Stanhope? And that just opened. Patron saint of whiskey. Right. Pretty much. Just the patron saint of everything. It was pretty amazing.

But he came to it like, yeah. Hang on, hang on. You have to remember we were having dinner and he was a lawyer up until probably he died. He never quit law. There was a few cases, I guess,

to take care of. How old was he? Oh, gosh. He was 83 and a half when he passed. And he was still working in consulting. You can't... You can't put a half-age on a dead person. I do. I always will. A child is trying

to get older. I'm five and three quarters. I will always put that on for him because I wanted him around as long as possible. So, yeah. But I'm very conscious of how that sounds when I'm like, he was 83 and a half. I know that sounds ridiculous, but it was

one of those things. Hang on. Editors break the creepy girl that we, Jaylee said, we gotta get out of here. She just showed up. Anyway. So, we'll ignore get out of here. She just showed up. Anyway. I know. So we'll ignore that.

But I remember we had dinner down in that basement of the Homestretch Foundation, where I was house-sitting before you left. And I wrote out, like, jokingly, I wrote out a will for him to sign. I remember that. And he did sign it. He did sign it. Did you have it? No, I thought you had it. Okay, one of us had, like, that would never get tossed.

No, I would have given it to you. Yeah. Because it was jokingly signed. Because I was talking down to him jokingly as an elderly person. Okay. Like loudly? Yeah. Like this?

Listen, I just want you to sign this piece of paper. I don't know what the joke was. And I gave it to him, and he laughed. And he willingly signed it. Oh, my gosh. Of course he did. He just made a production about it. Oh, I don't care him, and he laughed. And he willingly signed it. Oh, my gosh. Of course he did. He just made a production about, oh, I don't care. You can have everything.

And then I think that's when you told me he died. That's the first thing I brought up. Was the will. You get it, yeah. It was one of the other things that I mentioned to you earlier tonight, which is so meaningful, is that I have gone back and looked at the text message thread that the two of you would text each other through the whole summer. And it's fucking hilarious.

I do. Remember, because I was stuck in this basement. He's down the road a block away in Tucson, improper. Come on. I wasn't stuck in a basement. You had a really nice place that you were staying in. But I'm saying there's like... You paint a picture, though, when you say stuck in a basement.

Okay. Well, if you were stuck in the funhouse... With five TVs, a stocked fridge, internet. It was beautiful. But the point is, I'm not going out places. I'm just sitting in this weird estate, taking care of business, trying to write and not writing nearly enough, which writers do not write nearly enough. Is that true, Adrienne? It is absolutely true.

It can go on for decades. It can go on for decades. And it can continue to go on even past the death of the subjects of the book. But I remember sitting out in the back, and I remember there was like a lightning storm, and the power went out for a minute, and texting him. He was like age 79, whatever, at the time. No, he died at 83. I didn't text him when he was dead because I have respect.

I was texting him when he was whatever. But I know. He was vibrant. He's like Fred at home. Fred's 80 or 81 now and you go, I wouldn't fuck with him.

And I couldn't keep up with him at yoga. He was that kind of he was very sharp um mentally yeah he was no joe biden he was like sharp mentally this is not partisan joe biden is fucking completely not he's feeble i don't care about left or right politics. That guy, you go, ooh, your dad you could have a conversation with without wincing. He was great.

This is true. How strange, too, that since we're in upstate New York, my dad and Joe Biden were at law school together. At the same time. Well, yeah, I guess they would be. Their dad was older. But my dad was older because he went to the Navy first before going to law school.

So there was that. Let's get to the end of the story. After this happened in the car. Let's take a break. Okay. While we take a break, I asked this question in the car because they are one year apart. Who's going gonna live longer

joe biden or keith richards you make your choices after this we'll be right back helix sleep we have helix everywhere in both the Chaley's house, my bedroom, the guest house. You know how your grandma would put a plastic cover over the nice furniture so no one would sit on it? I put it over my Helix in the guest room in case people think they're going to fuck on it. You're not fucking on it. Barely look at it. you're not fucking on barely look at it helix sleep is a premium mattress brand that provides tailored mattresses based on your unique sleep preferences the helix lineup includes 14 unique

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That's BetterHelp.com slash Stanhope. Hey, we're back. Crazy person still in the building. I got warned while I was smoking. Probably. Anyway, but back to dementia people, crazy people, D. Bertine,

God bless her soul. Aww. And you didn't have a great relationship growing up. And if you read Catherine Bertine's books, I've read two. I don't, I think I loaned out the new one because I did buy it as soon as it came out.

Yeah, Stan. Stan. Stan. I don't think I read it. You did. You read it. Oh, I did? You did, and then you gave it away in Europe.

Where were you? Tivoli? Oh, no. Gibraltar. Gibraltar. The Rock of Gibraltar. Gibraltar. You did. I read like six books there. I read, I don't retain,

I don't know. You did talk about it on a podcast. I know at least momentarily it stayed with you for a day, maybe. Listen. But I love it. No, thank you. My brain is a spaghetti strainer. So we were talking about Dr. Pepper.

Dr. Pepper, which was my mom's favorite beverage. And smoking was her favorite activity. And Doug, you smoked a lot with her, right? A lot. You guys sat around and changed boats. The only thing we had in common was smoking and it was weird because it wasn't like like my friends dave raider i think i have that in common with people i can actually hang out with is smokers but she was a very specific smoker where when you put a cigarette out, you had to whatever, grind out all the tobacco from the butt.

And then she would put it in an ashtray that was behind the flower pot in the window. And she was very, like, if you didn't put it out the right way, she was angry at Duke. Oh, boy. She was a particular woman. Yeah. For sure. But at least I could smoke in her kitchen. Oh, she loved that.

Yeah. She loved that. Yes. Wow. And then the other thing was Dr. Pepper on ice. Oh. Yes, Dee. I would love a Dr. Pepper.

She drank that, like we were saying, not exaggerating, a six-pack a day, right? This is great. So when we made the decision to move her back east near Albany, where my brother lives. Albany? Albany. I guess I'll jump in the party here. Albany. My brother lives close by, and he has a duplex.

He's like, look, mom's at the stage where I can put her on one side. I live on the other. I can look after her and take care of her. Like a semi-assisted living. I could be a Doug Stanton if I want to be. Exactly. Partial assisted living. Just kidding.

But this was also, so this was during COVID, right? And one of the things that happened during COVID in real life was that a Dr. Pepper plant closed down. Yeah, I remember that. And People Magazine covered this. And so my brother's at the grocery store and he sees

People Magazine and it's got this picture of the closed Dr. Pepper facility. And he's like, oh, I know what I can do here. So he brings that back to my mom and says, I'm sorry, but Dr. Pepper is gone. There's no more. It's been closed, and we can't get Dr. Pepper anymore. And my mom, who first I will say that she's a very intelligent woman,

but dementia has stepped in to dilute the picture. Dementia only worked if you gave it a day. Like she, again, the ceiling fan and stuff, she thought I was a handyman. And she goes, well, you need to move this. And I want to build the back patio with the thing. And you've got to get rid of that ceiling fan. And I go, okay, I i'm gonna work on that and by the next time i came there she forgot no she didn't forget that i didn't do it she forgot she told me so she'd tell me again so but i brought her dr pepper that's right that was like

the salve of yeah it was but then he shows her the magazine and it was like it was like proof like dr i mean back in her day she read a lot but she wasn't reading us she just saw the picture of the closed down factory and that was it so he was able to successfully wean her off of the doctor yeah into what yeah Wow. Which is amazing. So that's what we were joking about by saying, like, you have to try this. This is amazing. It's the greatest water that exists on the planet. Up here in the Adirondacks. Up here in upstate New York.

Exactly. And she, you know, under that pretense of like, oh, this is the most incredible thing ever, she has water. And now she actually will be like, this is the greatest drink I've ever had. And she fully believes in water, which is, you know, it's probably like, finally, you're drinking something that's not solid sugar and it does taste good. Yeah. So not only is she completely off of soda, but my brother then seeing how well the Dr. Pepper experiment worked, he did the same thing with cigarettes and was like, look, I'm sorry, but it's COVID. Everything's shut down. They no longer make cigarettes anywhere at all, any brand.

Oh, well done. And he did it. He did it. So she went cold turkey. Wow. She had to. She had to. They don't make them anymore.

They don't make them anymore. They don't make them anymore. And I asked Pete, my brother, saying, like, what was that like? Was she just awful? Was she in this physical withdrawal? And he said, I think the dementia actually helped with that aspect. She just didn't think she smoked anymore? I think it was like she would actually ask him, like, are you a smoker?

Do you have cigarettes? And he'd say, no, Mom, I don't. Was he wearing, like, a uniform? He didn't have to have his name on his shirt. Someone reported cigarette smoke from this balcony. Right? I don't know exactly how he did it on the day-to-day, but it went quicker because, again,

she just would forget that she was craving something. again she just would forget that she was craving something how has her dementia like levels of how has that held up since three years ago yeah we're coming on three years now since since you were her caretaker slash handyman and she um she's actually doing great i mean we all know that dementia is only going to go downhill. But Pete says, and I also fully believe, that she's really kind of stayed in this middle ground, this homeostasis place. And a lot

of that has to do with that she's eating better. She's not taking in the sugar. Oh my god, her fucking diet was the worst. It was so bad. It was like chocolate donuts and, you know, we're chocolate donuts. I remember the first time I had to bring her food. I tried to make

this filet mignon or something. And she's like, man, what is this? She wants chocolate donuts. Oh, she was so rude. It was so bad. Like a hostess chocolate donut

with that waxy... Oh my god. Well, she liked the Entenmann's brand first. But you made her this wonderful dinner, and she really was just like, you know, where's my chocolate donut?

Fucking garlic mashed potatoes. Like the mini... You know when I would make bingo, like mini meals on a small, tiny plate. So I'd make a little bit of this and like two tiny, like mini forks full of this. You could eat like in one, swipe it with your finger and suck it off. But just tiny, just to be cute. I made something like that, but bigger, but small.

She's like, I don't know. Who is this man? Who is this man? Is he the handyman? No, she knew over that summer. She looked for it. No, but the first time I brought her food, I went out of my way to make a meal. I know you did. I watched you, because I was still in Tucson at that point, and you made

her this beautiful meal, but she just Did you have a chef's coat that said donut? That would have been better. No, she wanted chocolate donuts. She wanted her shit. I would do the same thing when I have dementia. You do. I make food all the time. You're like, I don't want that. I'm having beef stroganoff

or something you put in a crock pot for two days or something. Yeah. a crock pot for two days. Yeah. Yeah, because that's what you'll make. It goes to Christmas future. We were watching Naked and Afraid because I eat so little anyway. Chaley always, like, no matter what we order at Sushi, it's always too much. And I just want one bite, so I'll get a roll because

I want one bite and no matter what Shaylee will eat the rest of it I don't have to order in fact I figured that out after the last time we're sushi I go Tracy why do I even order first I should always be the last person to order based on what Doug orders I can figure out in my head if I'll be hungry after I finish what you don't eat. Like, I hate sushi where the order is two pieces of nigiri, because I only want one. Yeah.

I want one of each. That's why hey, Hana Tokyo and Sierra Vista is my favorite, because you can get one unagi. You can get one yellowtail. You can get one yellowtail. You can get one. And I just want, like, three pieces.

Anyway, I know he'll eat the rest. And we were watching Naked and Afraid the other night. And I go, this is me and Shaylee on Naked and Afraid. Do you want half my salamander? I can't finish my salamander. I know I've been here for three weeks. Well, maybe. Anyway, I don't know.

So, tomorrow, with this hike that we're doing, I'm just picturing the whole naked and afraid scenario and the half-salamander portion. We don't know what's going to happen. It's a long hike. How long are we supposed to walk? You were right. 2.3 miles total round trip.

When I said you told me it's an hour, Chaley did the math. So it's three miles? No, no. No, he did the math. He knew immediately that if it's an hour, it can't be more than three miles. She only knows fucking everything. Oh, yeah. I mean, if you walk like a straight line at a reasonably pace, it's like 14 minutes.

It is. Well, here's what I mean. It's 20 minutes. Oh, and Junior Stocka officially is not going. He's sitting in the car, or we can let him take the car and drive around for an hour. Just an hour. What I do know about the hike is that the first half mile is quite flat, and then it's the second half mile that has some rock scrambling in it.

Nice. It's about how fast. You see people when they write reviews that some people are like, oh, I did this in less than an hour. Other people are like, it took me five hours. It depends on what you do. I'm going to leave you and Adrian

to chat at each other because I'm not a good conversationalist in the morning. We're going to have to have a fucking caravan of three cars to get to Dad's Diner and then get to the trailhead and then leave Junior

behind. We'll leave Junior at Dad's Diner. We'll leave him with the car and the keys. He can go wherever the fuck he wants for an hour. The problem is, if this is the highest peak, I have a, I know we're about to end, but we haven't got to your book.

So do we make this a part two? Do you have to go to bed? Because I want to get to you too and get you involved. Are you happy to not be involved? I'm happy to not be involved. It's my favorite place. Yeah, there's so much shit that... There's a lot.

In the next year, 2023, we will have Adrienne where we're talking about her, but she can't talk about shit yet because of statute of limitations. I can tell you. Hang on. We're going on a hike tomorrow, and that's going to be. No, no, that'll be part two. But when your dad passed, Tracy has a story that I didn't...

No, she should tell the story. I'll be the backup. Yeah, you told me outside when we were smoking. We were at Shady Dell. Yeah. You and I and Shaley and Chad Shank and Jenny, we were at Shady Dell and you got a phone call.

Alright. You can continue. Oh, Tracy, I want to hear your side of this. Oh, no, just try. She just told me outside. Someone tell it so we can wrap up. Okay, so

well, then I know that this would have been very late at night on May 18th. And my dad is in the hospital and it was, we were not expecting him to pass until this whirlwind chain of events happened about within 36

hours where at first he thought he was Yeah, tell them how he, like what happened with his, oh he's dying. Yeah, yeah so the short story with this was that my dad thought um he had eaten something funny and he was having like a stomach bug and um and then the next morning he called me over and said i think this is more serious than a stomach bug and i went over and saw evidence of

what was going on and got him to the hospital. And what was really happening was that his heart was shutting down in rapid failure and was taking along like his GI tract and his kidneys all in one fell swoop. And what's amazing about what was such a tragic story is that this was also happening during COVID and everyone was was doing window visits at hospitals. I was very fortunate that my dad's cardiologist is also a cycling friend of mine. And I had him in my phone, right? So he calls me up and he says, come to the hospital. Your dad's in the non-COVID ICU.

I'm going to sneak you in the back door. He's got about 12 hours of conscious living left before he'll fall asleep. Oh, they know that precise. They knew at that point. They said... Just the attrition. The attrition. He said,

we're going to try to stabilize him, but there are four levels of stabilization. If nothing takes, then that'll be the end. He'll go to sleep. And so I had 12 hours of conscious talking with him where we got to just have real heart-to-hearts about what was happening.

And then as he was slowly fading, um, right. Tracy is bawling. We've been waiting for this. I don't want to interrupt. You're interrupting. You're not,

you're not like this. It's actually, it's crazy cries, but it's so meaningful to me because I, you know, I, I mean, now I'm going to start to,

but it's out of love. It's out of love. Um, and I was able to call the people that were closest to my dad, you know, and of course I'm falling apart. So I know I wasn't able to call everybody, but I knew that he would want to hear your voice. And so I, I held the phone, you know, my daughter was kind of in and out of sleep. So I held the phone. My daughter's kind of in and out of sleep. Oh, now I'm going to cry. It's okay.

I know that you might not remember this. No, but because that's what we did with Bingo in the coma. We had people talk to her. Talking. Even though she wasn't conscious. Everyone that we knew. We did. You passed the phone around. You passed the phone.

Fuck, I forgot this. Well, I definitely didn't forget. Because you were there, I forgot this. Well, I definitely didn't forget. Because you were there, you guys answered. I was able to hold the phone up and I said, if you want to say anything, this would be the time. He's partially asleep, but I'm sure he can hear you because we could see his

vital signs move. He was recognizing if people were talking. Sure. And we just weirdly happened to be at the Shady Dell. You were all there and you told him you loved him, and that made the world to me. Because I know that you might not be able to see it the way that I see it,

but you gave him the greatest gift that year, taking care of my mom and giving him peace of mind. It was the most beautiful thing, St. Stano. And it was beautiful, and I St. Stanhope and it was beautiful and I know that we have to go soon too so I want to just mention quickly that yeah you're getting the light honey

right I'm glad we're all coming my dad loved you and I love you and you're just amazing all of you you know to be on the phone during that moment and the other thing too being COVID you know I love you and you're just amazing all of you you know to be on the phone during that moment and the other thing too being COVID you know I wasn't able to really see anybody or hug anybody or touch anybody so just voice like that hearing you you know say goodbye and say that you

love me you love my dad was was such love you know that I was able to feel, too. And it was pretty amazing. I'm okay. But long story short from that, one of the ways that I was able to mourn my dad over these past couple years. We're going to have to save this. Are we saving this? That's a whole other story in itself. Okay. I'd love to share that story.

No, that's a part, too. Okay. Is how the hike comes into play. No, that's a part two. Okay. How the hike comes into play. What we're doing tomorrow. We'll save that. We'll save it. We're going on a hike. We're going on a hike that has more meaning than a hike.

How about that? I remember... I'm getting donuts in the morning. For sure. Listen, this is a serious podcast. The things, I mean, I already talked about writing, signed the will to me and all that, and there was a book.

Oh, yes. What was the book? Oh, it was great. My dad loved Bill Bryson. He was one of his favorite authors. And so Bill Bryson wrote a book called At Home. And you found that at a thrift store and you gave it to my dad. He didn't have that one.

And you wrote in there. I have it. I took a photo of it, but it was a really hilarious comment of like, you know, dear Peter, I suggest you start at the end because we don't know how much time you have left. It was so funny. Preciate. It was so funny. And my dad got such a kick out of that.

You know, and I still have this book, and I love that you've written in it. The three things that I remember the most about your dad, like when we talked man-to-man, he loved Helix Mattresses, BetterHelp.com, and DraftKings. And we're wrapping it up. He would have found that so funny. Take us out of here, Big O. Okay, bye-bye now. សូវាប់ពីបានប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់� Thank you. you