The Doug Stanhope Podcast - Pt. 06 - 10 Minute Podcast in Daytona Beach, Florida

Episode Date: March 28, 2016

Pre Order Doug's book "Digging Up Mother: A Memoir" on Amazon and Barnes & Noble Doug, Andy Andrist, Chad Shank and Chaille review go over highlights of the Comedy Killers show in Daytona Beach, Florida. Doug is in Daytona Beach, Florida during Spring Break 2016. Doug decided to keep drinking and do 10 minute podcasts throughout the day.   Recorded March 26, 2016 in Daytona Beach, FL with Doug Stanhope (@dougstanhope), Chad Shank (@hdfatty), Andy Andrist (@andyandrist), and Ggreg Chaille (@gregchaille). Produced and Edited by Ggreg Chaille.   LINKS: Doug Stanhope's Celebrity Death Pool - https://www.dougstanhopescelebritydeathpool.com/ Pre Order Doug's book "Diggin Up Mother: A Love Story" on Amazon and Barnes & NobleDoug's DVD/CDs are all available at DougStanhope.comSupport the show: http://www.Patreon.com/stanhopepodcast

All right, 10 minutes. Let's go. All right, this is another 10-minute podcast, and it's Saturday now, and we'll play a little roundtable of, all right, who remembers what happened when last night with Chad Shank, Andy Andrist, and Greg Chaley? Junior's downstairs somewhere. Sean Rouse, I don't know if he could actually... Sean Rouse is resting his brutal bones.

We're a block away from him, so I doubt we'll ever see him Yeah, that's like a three-day walk. That's a three-day walk for Sean. It might as well be a different country. He's not going to make it over here. Sean Rouse, to me, was last night, watching him get up all

crooked and bent. Hilarious, by the way. But it's like the John Merrick of comedy. He just gets more... That's Elephant Man for you. Look it up, kids. Google it. So good, though.

I ended up missing a little bit of Rouse's set dealing with the guy who hated Andy. Yeah, I had another Christian death threat. And Andy went up first. I didn't realize that until you mentioned it. He fucking hated Andy and then waited until Rouse to walk out and fucking. Yeah, sat through. Yeah, yeah.

They come and then they go. She said, you were awful. And she said, we were having a good evening till you came on. And then it was like an hour later they were leaving. You were the start of the show, really. I know, yeah. It's a Sean Rouse walkout. Yeah, they held their outrage.

Walking at the same pace. He gets the credit for that. Sean Rouse gets the credit for that. You don't get that. Does Andy get an assist on that at least? Yeah, yeah, yeah. The guy told Andy, I was standing there, and the guy told, I'll see you outside. And then he didn't stop there.

He goes, and bring this guy with you. And Damien Figgler. Oh, yeah, and Damien Figgler. Who's bigger than Chad. Yeah. And more fucking hair-triggered to fucking hit somebody than me, I found out. Yeah, yeah, that was obvious. Yeah, someone walked up on stage.

I'm very blurry with a lot of it. Yeah, that was late. Yeah, there were like three or four incidents. But the one, yeah, the Christian guy, him and his wife, they were berating me as I ruined Easter because of the Jesus stuff or whatever. I don't even know what you said about Jesus. I can't remember the three jokes from the whole night.

Yeah, I don't remember either. I just remember laughing my balls off. I got the best joke of the night. What do you got? It was when we were in the green room when we just got there. We're sitting around. It's kind of sparse in there. It's like set up for a banquet.

Oh, it's a terrible room. They had another venue initially that got canceled. So at the last minute, they got this banquet hall conference room. Scramble. It's a scramble. And a hotel next door. So we're in the green room going Scramble. It's a scramble. And a hotel next door. So we're in the green room going, wow, and there's no booze.

We're just kind of looking around. I mean, it's only a half hour to show time. You'd think it would all get taken care of. And then Junior walks in and goes, well, we just set up the refunds table. I do remember that. It's doing good. Yeah, yeah. Well, it's good they put the queue lines, the stanchions. That really helped the flow.

Yeah, that was a rowdy night, though. It was, yeah, for 60 people. Yeah. It was all at these big eight tops. Some makeshift stage meant for Shriners and Girl Scout auctions. Like addressing the corporate awards. Yeah, corporate awards for the insurance company. Hey, best in sales. Come on up.

I remember someone rushed the stage, and that's when Damien Fickler came in like a linebacker, and I thought it was Chad because he had long hair. That was the second one. That was the chick that Rouse had on stage, which I missed part of because I was dealing with the other guy still. Her boyfriend was pissed off because she was outside crying they called me a whore

and all of a sudden he bolted through the doors and I was outside and he was up and I ran up to the doors and told Figgler and I'm like get that guy get that guy I like that part because he didn't go which guy or what's happening he just turned around and fucking bolted

I'm grabbing someone threw that fucker right off the stage Doug had called her a cunt and then then Shawn goes I disagree with Doug you're not a cunt you're a whore that's right and then she had something to say and Rouse totally playing into it was so yeah you want to come up and so she came to the stage and then he kind of i don't know what you call how he walks but he kind of moved towards the edge of the stage and she's it's like somebody slowly spilling a drink it's like a snail that makes creaking noises so he gets to he, he walks to where she is. It's a

foot and a half up, okay? And he goes, oh no, don't get up here. You just stand right there. And he starts undoing his belt, which was fucking hilarious. And then she was clearly going to get on stage, at which time that's when I went up there to make sure she didn't get on stage, because

that's really not what this was about. Hey, she was gonna to suck my dick. Yeah. Now I have to go and try to jerk off with this. He holds up a little claw hand. That was fucking hilarious. Oh, God.

What a fucking fun night. He has the one that's more claw-like than the other. He goes, this is the one I had fixed. Now they're going to fix this one. Holding a glass. Yeah. The one that could work, they're going to fix.

Oh, Jesus. Oh, man. What a night. Yeah. I remember, go back to the Christian guy. I remember a line he says, because he was, I don't mind the vulgarity, but when you start breaking down Jesus. He goes, who are you to me? He goes, who are you?

And I go, I'm your motherfucking redeemer. Oh, yeah, Andy was stirring the shit pot, too. Well, he asked who I was. Your mother? shit pot too. Well, he asked who I was. Your mother? Chad,

he says, I'll meet Andy and I'll meet you outside and you can bring Chad and Damien. He points them out. Bring those two. And Chad says, you don't have to wait for Andy. We can deal with this ourselves. I get it if you want to stretch. I told him, I go, let's just head out now and skip all that. And then he's like, all right.

And we were walking out like amicably side by side, like we were going to go out and have a pugilistic match. He had no idea we were four. Queensbury rules. Clint Eastwood in any which way you can. We were four feet from the stairs, at which point I was going to kick him down the stairs from the back. But that's when the manager came out and I decided to get a dip in the stairs from the back. But that's when

the manager came out and I decided to get a dip in the mat. The funny part was the manager was an obvious homosexual and the Christians had to complain to the gay guy about the anti-Christian. I never thought about that angle.

Oh yeah, the Bible's been good to me. Lesser of two evils. I know you're going to burn in hell, but could you help me with this situation? I need your help. You think you could have sold that guy a stolen Bible on his way out? A little souvenir from the night? Your Easter weekend? They didn't want to buy merch.

That wasn't why she was trying to get in the green room with you? Yeah, she came in the green room and she goes, you don't have anybody in here. I'm like, well, yeah, I could fucking kill you. Yeah, there's nobody and no security cameras. What's up? One thing that you did have me write down, Doug, was it's only funny if you actually do it. Oh, that was, yeah, that's something else. It's not podcast related. All right. That was that guy, yeah, that's something else. It's not podcast related.

All right. That was that guy. I forget that guy's name. He was really funny. Panzer? Panzer. Yeah, Mike Panzer. Yeah, he was fucking killing me.

Yeah. Had me cracking up. Yeah. He's got the greatest hair. Yeah. Completely bald on top and the sides are all frizzy. Larry Fine style. He's got Larry's, Larry was a little bit more of a pig.

Like a little bit of an eater. That's a compliment. This is a hairstyle that'll guarantee you don't have to pick up your buddy's kid at school. You don't have to be doing somebody's bits, but it was fucking... It was good. Yeah.

So there's one more show tonight. Yeah. And our tourney was good. Yeah. So there's one more show tonight. Yeah. And our attorney's here. Yes. Junior's here. We'll do another 10-minute podcast in another 10 minutes. Is that about 10 minutes? I think that's perfect.

I like doing it like this. All right. Another podcast right around the corner.