The Flycast - OpTic INTERNAL STRUGGLES MID TOURNAMENT | The Flycast Ep. 95

Episode Date: November 28, 2023

CENTR - Use Code OPTIC25 for 25% off first order Link: https://optic.link/CENTR Flycast Podcast presented by CordaRoy's https://cordaroys.com/products/optic-gaming-bean-bag-by-cordaroys Load the OpTic APP now here! https://optic.link/NationYT Rate the App 5-Stars! Check out the OpTic SCUF collection and use code “OpTic” for a discount: https://scuf.co/OpTic Check out the OpTic Podcast here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/optic-podcast/id1542810047 https://open.spotify.com/show/25iPKftrl0akOZKqS0wHQG MB01VRXLRVBBYYQ OpTic INTERNAL STRUGGLES MID TOURNAMENT | The Flycast Ep. 95

And I'm just like, bro, like every year we get one month. We get one month where people play our game that usually don't play our game. We get the courage is, the doctor disrespects, the nickmurxes, the fucking Dr. Lupos. We get those people that play our game for one month and then they leave. Welcome back to another episode of the podcast. Episode 95. We got a special guest today. Roger.

Roger's on the pod this morning. He's on the bean bag. He's on the bean bag. He just shook his head. I got a lot to say today. Let's hear it, man. What's going on? You're canceled?

Yeah, I woke up this morning to TST being canceled. Wait, why are you guys canceled? Yesterday we played GBs and we played a team of like hackers. one one if not two were 100% walling and so we were playing fives actually with uh with nick falco and um or nick envy and yingling and at the end we were just all just like shit talking you know like we were going to game chat and be like you guys are fucking losers and shit and then they would take they would say shit back what one of their guys said how does it feel to know that all of optic is jerking it to your mom's only fans And I was like, that was pretty good.

Your mom's only thing? Yeah, that's pretty good. And two of them were girls on the team. So Blake said something like, you know, like it's... Your tits are small. No, he didn't say that. That'd be mean. That would be mean.

He said, he said something like, well, you know, it's a couple walling guys carrying some women. And so, like... Oh. Yeah, so... Did he just practice? say men are better than women in video games and women need us. That's the stretch that they're going for.

No one said anything about my mom having an only fan. Because the girls aren't good enough. The girls aren't good enough to compete against you without playing with male cheaters. Is that what Blake was insinuated? That's what they're saying Blake was insinuating. Yeah, I see it. I definitely see it. And at one point, Blake said, at one point Blake said that Snapchat story is going to go crazy, though,

talking about like them screenshoting them beating us and putting it on the Snapchat story and they like tried to stretch that too like saying that they have they're putting themselves on Snapchat stories because they're women and I was just like dude is it actually like going somewhere uh just got just got a text from Activision about it so from Activision what the fuck apparently it's going to like like your street the people the streamers and shit or not the streamers the people watching the stream like someone tried to make it a big deal no the girl the the girl we played apparently in who was it i don't know i don't know her i've never heard of her before but apparently she plays like in the in the women's league and stuff um so

yeah it it's it's it's frustrating comes with this like celeb lifestyle you know yeah sths TST. I feel bad because we were playing Nick, Nick and, have you ever heard of the yard? Like Ludwicks podcast? So one of the guys we were playing with is on that podcast. And he was like, bro, like, I haven't played Cod in like 10 years. And so we played GPs with them. And that's what happens.

I'm literally screaming in the mic, dude. I'm literally screaming in the mic like, have a happy Thanksgiving. I hope you go home and none of your family looks you in the eyes because they all hate you. Like I'm like really going to him But I mean that's just I was also doing it to be like just try to be entertaining Because he also said Because it's just fucking boring sometimes Dude it's GBs like it's GBs and they're for sure

When I go in pubs I'm like you guys are fucking bad They're for sure walling Right exactly let's make this fun It's just cod And these guys were for sure walling Like for sure walling Imagine playing with a cheater But you can you complain to

Activision about what... I mean, I don't know if they complain to Activision. I don't know. But I think it's just like kind of picked up a little bit. But like... But like to say that... The Jake Sucky. No.

But to say that like TST out of all fucking people is like degrading to women is great. I think it's just crazy. You guys are actually all... Like I fucking... I rock with the fuck. I rock with the female competitive side. I have...

For a long time. Like in my first ever tournament, I had, like, women playing in the tournament. I just like, I think it's fucking sick. Because there are some girls, especially over the past, like, three years that have just really turned up. Like, they're super, super, super good. We saw something in the pro sim. Dude, T is insane. Yeah.

T is insane. I didn't even know that was a girl. I literally said she had like 14 or 15 kills. I was like, who the fuck is T? T's insane. They're like, it's a, uh, some challenger girl. I'm like, what the fuck? Selly is insane.

Smixie is insane. Ken, Ken's Rosie is insane. Dude, there's so many fucking girls that are so good. Now Hitch is back pedaling.

Yeah, that's what I'm doing. Back pedaling. I actually hate. And it's funny because, like, like, they'll go,

like, the girl who tweeted this was just like, you know, degrading towards women. And now there's people in her comments that are like,

well, the reason they say that is because men are just so much better than women. And I'm like, dude I don't like no like you're not defending me that's not how I feel at all

and I don't fuck wouldn't and then they'll be like see see what you causing and I'm like I didn't do anything all I did I mean I said some wild shit but also I didn't say anything remotely close to fuck it one of the guys on the team literally said how does it feel that all of Optic jerks it to your mom's only fans I was like how are

how are you getting mad at what Blake says whenever your teammate said that. You go to your mom's Facebook. You just see a link tree. You're like, what the mom? Come on. Come on, mom. Come on, mom.

But yeah, anyway, that's what was happening. Shout out Roger for bringing that up. Yeah. Start off on a fucking positive note. Yeah, well, I'm mad. Oh, what are you mad about? I was actually really mad like this morning. Like, I was in a bad mood.

It's slowly fading away. But I wanted to bring this like mad energy to the podcast. Okay, okay. From yesterday or from our match last night. Like going into it, I was like, I don't know, just the whole thing. I was like, this is like a fun tournament. Like some creators, some pros, some random people from here and there. It's like a fun tourney.

And then we get six in one. We get to the finals. I'm like, damn, we can actually win this thing. And then we get there. who's this thing fucking play scumps team last night and the gcc s for 50 or for 20k and we lost

three to one and I was so fucking mad like I felt so bad for you guys I haven't been that mad in so long not only did I feel like I just feel like I know I'm not good and like I've pretty much I've performed better the more we've played

but I still like I felt bad I just felt like I let down my team like I just know Mike P would be on top of the world I know Pam would like love this shit like Sky's probably I mean Skies is just fun Yeah this guy's just fun I genuinely feel like it's on me to win Because I feel like I have a

Not that they've hit their peak But I feel like I have a ceiling that I'm like Not even close to reach yet with this game And it's just like, like, I think I could be pretty good if I, if I grinded this game. But I just haven't been grinding. But I still felt like, all right, finals, like, I'm going to lock the fuck in. Yeah. Like, and I've always, what's the word?

I've always, um, just felt like I was that type of player to when like scrimms, yeah, you beat me online. Matchmaking, sure, yeah, whatever. Ranked play. congrats. But then when it comes the fucking tourney time, like, I'm trying to lock in and I'm like trying to get in like a fucking flow state. I'm trying to make plays. I'm trying to not throw my life away.

I'm trying to stay alive. I'm trying to, like, I'm trying to make good play. And yesterday it was just like, like, I can't say I played bad. Like I had, I killed scump a few times off rip, which is just like, we win the round at that point. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then so I can't say I played bad,

but it was just like, dude, I could none like there was a few times i just like threw my life away and i would like die to scum i would like challenge scump instead of just knowing it is scump and like live and fucking just i'm just after there was plays where it's like i didn't even know i had bomb and suddenly it's 12 seconds left i got a plan i get sniped we lose the round in a 1v3 because i didn't know i had bomb like just a little shit like that to where like after the tourney and after we lose i just like it all happens losing happens so fast

that I was just like dude like we didn't have like a like we were just sitting there watching them play their whole fucking their first series and they go to game five and then they play us and it's like oh shit okay time to play it's just like shooting some bots and just didn't really feel warmed up

and then we go into the match we go down did we go down oh two I think we might have went down oh two I think you guys went down oh two yeah and I was just like fuck man like it goes game and you guys won the next I was just like what yeah and then we won game three six oh and I was like all right here we fucking go yeah yeah yeah like we're gonna fucking win this shit but there's just so many little plays and so many like randoms I mean

you could say that for any S&D tourney of like dude if I would have just dude that's S&D so you can literally say that about every single S&D tourney but just the whole fucking night, man. Like, I drank my, I drank, uh, an energy drink at like 7 p.m. or 8 p.m. Like, like, getting ready for it. And played it. I feel like it all. I wish it was like a best of seven or something. Yeah. Because it just happened. We got three one. I was just like, man. Like, that's it. Yeah. Yeah. And it was just, I don't know. I fucking. I was like, God, I didn't even feel like I, like, got into it. Like, a bunch of fucking weird place happened. We threw a few rounds. Yeah. And then.

it hit me and I was just like god fucking dude like I was so mad like I was really thinking about like making like I'm glad I didn't but like a bad tweet I'm just like damn I wish I had two call a duty pros who have been playing for 10 years alongside an apex pro in the

and just people involved in the pro scene for like I don't know what I was gonna but I was just like no I'm not fucking like that's just beyond petty and pathetic but i was just i haven't been that mad and forever like i was mad my girl was like what's wrong i was just like i literally just went like this just like he's like you mad dude like okay i leave you alone i was like i literally wasn't like even smile like i was dude i haven't been that fucking mad and like you'll you'll heal you're you'll heal you're you'll me, you'll hear me rage on

Valoran or something, but it's just like for a spawn or whatever, and I'm kind of mad, but it's like, I get off the game, I go home and it's like whatever. But after that, like, it fucked with me. And I don't, I don't know why, but I think it was

more so just, like, disappointed in myself of like, dude, come on. We're in the fucking finals. Like, made some average fucking plays, died average like if skies would die i would try to like force some play and just throw my life away because i was like skies is that i got to make something fucking happen yeah yeah it's just like dude play the i don't know it's just like and it's not even like i played bad like skies did his thing and then the rest of us sort of just did what we do yeah so it's not like i cost it but i was just like i was just

like fuck man like dude it's i'm tired of like not just winning it's a crazy thing like playing a tournament like having not played because I haven't played tournament like a real tournament in a long long time and then I played the pro sem and we make it to finals and I did not think your team

was making it to finals me neither I was like they're gonna be one of the shittier teams yeah that's what I mean dude fucking I mean I didn't think we're gonna make it to finals

but because I played a lot better than I thought it was gonna do and Smixie was fucking frying so like and then obviously we had like legends besides the two of us but it was really down to me and smixie and i played a lot better with a sniper than i thought i was going to do and she like really turned up with the with the

okay so we make it to finals i play george in finals it goes to game seven game to two yeah two two two wait yeah two two two two six whatever a bracket reset game Oh, yeah. Or game three, round, because it's to eight, so it was round 15. 1V1, Abizi versus George, and George wins it? Dude, it was the weirdest feeling. I was so sad. I was so sad.

But also it's George. I was so sad. And then I look on Twitter, and dude, that clip is everywhere of George Gunning Abizi. I felt bad for Abe. Just like, dude, can't I get that feeling? I want that fucking feeling. I mean, dude, it's just, it's funny because like after that, I'm just like, man, this is why I don't play in tournaments. Because it's just like, if I don't win, I am devastated.

But also, like, it's fun to play in. I don't know. It's a weird feeling. I was saying that before a match yesterday. I was like, dude, I just don't. I know the only way for me to, like, get better is going to be playing, I guess, pubs, eights and wagers or whatever. but it's just like I just don't want to but when it comes to attorney like

I'm actually like excited to play it's like it's something about that bracket that's just so fun so much fun I don't know I'm but regardless like I know this has been like kind of a depressing pod so far but like GGCS has been a lot of fun

yeah it's been fun as fuck to like run I was nervous about it I mean it's 64 players keeping track of 64 players is so hard 64 plus cod ego inflated dog dude not necessarily

I don't want to say ego inflated but it's like pro gamers don't respect TOs at all what's TOs mean tournament organizers yeah yeah like they kind of just

they'll be like I'll get there like the matches the matches are supposed to start at seven like even POMage isn't in our party until he joined it like 708. I'm just like, dude, like, where are, where is? I'm looking at the Discord. No one's like, only half the teams are now.

I'm like, dude, it starts at seven. Like, people should be joining lobbies at fucking seven. Dude, you would think that like pros are screaming till 725. And it's just like, dude. It's, I mean, it's tough. Because, like, you have to have pro players in there and you have to have big creators and you have to fill in the gaps from there. So, like, every team mostly has.

a creator or someone who's outside of Cod, like a Mike P or a Chandler or a myth or a snipe down. But like, and then you have a pro player and then you fill in the gaps like from there. But dude, it's impossible to get everybody there on time. And like it not being, it being matches instead of the tournament. If you guys don't know what we're talking about. We're talking about a kickoff style event. that optic is throwing that, you know, I've put a lot of hours into organizing and it's 16 teams,

heavily content creator focused. There were five days of matches. And then whoever comes out on top of the standings plays for a $20,000 match. Nick was one of the top two players, top two teams, plays against Scumps team. And then on the other side of the bracket, Dr. Lupo's team played shifties team and um so those were the two 20,000 dollar matches and now we're going to have a 16 team tournament on the 27th. So that's the finals. Um, and it's been, dude, it's been a fucking black. It's, it's cool to see like how what how much people are like locking in and like figuring it all out. Because like if, if you would have told me like that you would be playing cod, what is it like three weeks after cod came or two weeks after cod came out, I'd be like

Nick's not going to play cod, but like, now you're playing because of this, you know, tournament. I don't know. It's been a lot of fun. It's definitely, I wanted to, I wanted to simulate that, like, Sunday night softball league feeling. And that's kind of what you kind of get from it. Yeah. People are playing with the teams. It's, um, and I tell myself it's for fun.

But the old, I feel like this, like, the young, like, kid. me fucking last night it came out like I was I just I I know I've said it but I'll say it again I haven't been that fucking mad in so long it was like this internal fucking rage that it just like it all happens so quick I was like fuck like a Mike P was in like a 1v3 and I was like fuck we we fucking lost I was just like oh my god man and then it ends and people start leaving discord I'm just like, geez, good try. And everyone leaves Discord and I'm sitting there in my chair

and I'm just thinking someone has to fucking die now. Are you good? I'm telling you, I was fucking enraged. I was like, I need to fight someone immediately. Someone must die. I'm about to lose my fucking mind. Like I was, it was like,

it reminded me of when I was like 14 losing in Halo 2 and just grabbing my controller and fucking slamming it and I was just like but I'm in a house or I'm at my place with my girl and she's all relaxed upstairs in the bed and two dogs and I got to take them

out and I'm just like I just was so fucking mad and then like I just drank an energy drink so I was up till four like four in the morning this morning slept like shit I woke up still fucking mad and I don't know what it was like

the like inner child of me came out because usually I won't let I mean I get mad I fucking rage all the time on stream but like I don't know this was like some deep internal I mean it's because it's well not only was it for money it was because you played with this team for five days

up to this point so at all come in my head I'm like dude we just serve this scump and made you don't need your fucking $5,000 like the other wait scump made Daltuzge you don't fucking need this

the other guy I'm sure he does does well from fucking Apex. I'm just like, you fuckers don't fucking... Not that we desperately fucking need this, but I'm like, we're the fucking team that like

people should root for. It's like the average Joe's fucking take down scump and aid shot. And it's just like, yay, scump wins again. Gunt wins another tourney, yay. And I was just like so fucking mad. I was like,

how did I just let this happen and it just it all happened so quick like I was mad we didn't get like a we didn't have a series to play beforehand so it's like we started off and we were just like cold and fucking just not I don't know

yeah it just felt off and like obviously no excuses they played better than us but we were just fucking up so many rounds and yeah it's just so many regrets and it's like people look like are hearing this

and they're like, dude, it's not that big of a deal. No one gives a buck. But in my head, I was just like, dude, I like, I don't know.

Like, I wanted to like, it's that competitiveness. It's that competitiveness. Yeah. It was just like we lost and now none of them get anything. Like,

and I just felt so, I don't know. It was just, I was so mad. Well, to be fair. It really, it fucked with me more than I ever thought. Thought it would.

Yeah. Ever. That's how I felt from the pro sim too. I was like, because I just put me, Blake and George in that tournament is that we don't play any other tournaments. We just host other tournaments, but we always play the pro sem because it's just, it meets

our, it's like kind of our style. And so I just put the three of us in there, not expecting, I mean, Blake won it last year, but his team was ridiculous. Not expecting myself or George or Blake to ever, like, make the finals, but then we both made the finals. And I was like, holy shit, like, I can fucking win. I haven't thrown tournaments for 10 years. And I've never won a single turn.

I've never won one. of my tournaments ever. I was like, I could fucking win my own tournament. And they have to beat you twice. Yeah. Fucking symphony is just cracked out of his fucking gullet. Dude. I just freep. Wasn't he the captain for one of them?

Yeah. That just pisses me all. Well, sit. Okay. I'm like, dude, the captain should be like shitters. And I just see like me, other shitter, other shitter, other shitter. Symphony. Some new.

And then symphony who's been playing eights, playing a turnies. Well, I had to, I had to invite. I had to invite the captain. before the game came out. Yeah. So when I invited Symphony, every year, I've been watching Sim for four years now.

Every year when the game comes out, Symphony grinds to get his camo, and that's it. He grinds to get his camo, and then waits for Warzone to come out. This year, he's been grinding eights. He's a part of the fucking eights and wagers. He's been playing with scomp and nade and Bose and Zen every day.

And I was like, like, shit, I just screwed everyone. And that team mate. When that team was formed, I was like, they were going to win. Same. I mean, I thought the same thing. I was like, if I play good, I think our team has a chance.

I mean, at that point, you just got to hope that, like, whatever pro just goes the fuck off, which is what Abizi did for us. Like, dude, Abe is so fucking good. And he was going off. Wait, who was my team? Me, Bose. Kenny. Kenny, Mutex. Lunchtime?

Lunchtime. That's an insane team. That was a good team. Dude, that was a sweat. did not like it was the sweatiest pro seb ever made we literally the sweatiest prosum ever like kenny definitely made some plays and lunchtime made some plays but besides that i felt like like i thought mutex was going to go the fuck off when he joined he was like bro i'm about a shit on these kids but that's mutex like he lives for this shit he loves this shit and he was like dude

i'm about a shit on these kids i'm gonna show you all some like credit spots like it's gonna be the easiest fucking free kills i'm gonna tell you go somewhere you sit there free kill and i was just like holy i was like this is what i'm talking about we're fucking winning this charles let's fucking go i was i was like symphony's team is probably the best team but i was like we could definitely beat them though like yeah but then we just i don't know we were starts off we win i don't really remember oh bo's wanted snipe i was like i guess i'm sniping then and boz was like nah let me sniping and i in my head, I was like, dude, I don't know. Like, you,

like, it's not like I'm horrible, but like, Bose, you know the game. Like, in the, once the beginning push happens and shit settles down and people were here, people were there, like, I need Bose's knowledge to, like, be in the middle and get in the mix and fucking, like, no timings and shit like that. In my head, I was just like, I will let you do whatever you think will help us win. And so the first, like, few series, Bose was running snipe. But I was doing pretty good. I was like, I was actually playing pretty well and, like, getting kills.

And I was like, okay, finally. I'm fucking, like, getting a little better at this fucking game. And then I think we had a really close series and Bose was sniping. And he was just like at the bottom of the scoreboard. And he was just like, dude, I'm getting into like no action. It's like, maybe I get a cross-map snipe. And he was like, dude, he was like, I might need that AR. I'm like, dude, take whatever you fucking want.

Right. This is why I said in the beginning, I will take snipe because like once the beginning, once you don't hit the beginning snipe or don't see anyone, it's like, then what? And then in the middle is when I'm like, I sort of maybe know a beginning break, but if no action happens, then I'm like, I don't know what to do. Do I try to make a play? Do I keep sitting in this spot? So I'm like, Bose, if you want, you just like, yeah, but you're doing pretty good with it.

I'm like, yeah, but you're Bose. What do you want to fucking use? It's like, all right, I'll take the AR. And then I took snipe and I was kind of fucking piecing with snipe as well. That's how I felt. I was playing pretty good. And then I don't know. We were just like, I don't know what was happening.

It would kind of be like I go somewhere and snipe and then they sort of try to make a play here. But they were like not making plays. And I don't know what was happened. Mutex said he was playing bad. And just what, I don't know. I thought we had a fucking squad because like I'll hear Kenny on stream and he's like super good at comms. Like it seems like he like kind of leads and like sort of IGLs and he just seems super smart. So I thought like they would just make some shit happen.

But I don't know. It seemed like we sort of were just like fucking winging it. Yeah. And like round would start and we would just go. No one need. Not even like a y'all, I'm going to go here. Right. That's the thing with those tournaments.

It was just like we would start like. You need someone to coach you like. Because like Aiden, Aiden was really good at like being like, yo, you should do this. and then an abe would just fry and then Octane would basically like tell me where to go so like you kind of need that

Yeah and we did not have that's why I love the pro sem so much is because it's just like it's such a blend of people that usually don't play together that I think it's kind of cool to like see them play together there's a big thing going on or is a

it's not that big there's I mean it's mostly just like a few people just chatting shit but the like the people on the cod competitive Reddit are like pissed that like I'm throwing tournaments that aren't just like CDL tournaments that aren't just like 4V4 hard point S&D and I'm just like bro like every year we get one month we get one month where people play our game that usually don't play our game we get the courage is the doctor disrespects the nick is the the fucking Dr. Lupos. We get those people that play our game for one month and then they leave.

Why not capitalize on that viewership so that maybe there's a little bit of fucking crossover? We got Snipe Down and Myth playing with Kenny. You don't think that maybe some of Snipdown and Myths community is like, damn, this Kenny guy is fucking good. Like, who does he play for? Oh, he plays for Optic? What's Optic? oh they play in the CDL like you don't think that happens like like I mean there's a clip of

Natechot being like what who is Mike P he's a fucking battle are we sure this guy's a battle rapper he shoots straight a shit and then you don't think that some of Natechot's like community is like who is wait Mike P the battle rapper and then they go watch it's just like there's such a blend of like of of audiences that like why why why why would you want a fucking hard point where Skies is shooting Sib Across the map in spawns that no one really knows about yet because the game has been out for two months two months two weeks and we're gonna get Seven months of CDL Like

I mean I'm not gonna lie I when you told me the attorney was S&D only I was like fuck because I've always I from a spectator point of view I Like S&D better What when I'm watching Nate shot and them play AIDS I'm like to just play S&D that like no one gets Like, I am getting nothing out of watching you all play respawn. Like, S&D can get a little, like, fun. But I, when you told me the, uh, the GGCS or whatever was going to be just S&D, I was like, fuck. Because I do like playing respawn.

Respond is so fun. And it, like, gives me momentum. It, like, teaches me the map. Like, I just feel like I'm getting my only practice has been, like, playing pubs before our matches. Yeah. See, I think that that clutch. That, like, feeling of clutching up in S&E is nothing compared to that feeling of, like, pop in a four-piece or, like, breaking a hill by yourself or something like that. Or, like, pulling the flag and getting a kill and then running the flag, getting a kill and capping it.

Like, dude, respawn is such a difference. You're like, you get for, there's forgiveness. Yeah. I'm like, fuck. I knew he's going to come there. Now I'm dead. Oh, wait. It's respawn.

I, I'm responding. I'm back in. I'm back in it. Yeah. it's just like you die and you're just like, fuck. No, I got to, damn it I put George in a 1v3 fuck. I should have just

yeah. God damn it fucking Pomage is still back my fucking base. We were all bit. Yeah, I fucking, I came into the office this morning. Go to come up the elevator, I turn around, someone's walking right behind me.

And it's just fucking Pomage. I'm like, what the, what are you doing here? He's like, oh, you got to do the podcast for hex is hip I'm like I'm like okay like who they'll be doing the podcast with me scump

and pomage I was like Jesus Christ I was like we'll see how this goes but luckily we just talked about our fucking match the whole time Pam was Pam was saying how Pistie was like when I first saw him

today I was like dude I'm so mad like I was talking in our group chat and I was just saying the typical match like these guys are so fucking bad too like we could have like we should have beat them literally gave them the win And like, I'm so pissed. And then I see Pam this morning.

I was, like, saying the same shit to him. I was like, dude, I barely got any sleep. I'm still so mad. He was like, dude, so am I. He was like, I didn't fall asleep until like seven. I was like, what the fuck? You slept for like an hour? He's like, yeah.

I was just like, dude. And then we were talking to Seth about it this morning and we're just like saying how mad we were. And Seth was like, Jesus Christ. He was like, I would have gave you all the win if I knew this was going to fucking happen. Like, first off, no, you fun. No, you fucking won it.

Second off, I know you enjoy the fact that we're mad. I don't know if he enjoys it. That piss me off that you're trying to be nonchalant about the fucking win, as if you're not on top of the fucking world of that stupid trophy. So I don't know, just a lot. So you've done the podcast, you did the podcast this morning and the fly? Yeah. Oh, shit.

And played pubs in between trying to get three daily challenges. So I'm going to unlock fucking gloves or something. Because when I play pubs, I'm just. what a beautiful podcast so far with two very intelligent men i know you guys are watching this podcast to learn more about yourself and to learn more about self-help um topics but also just general intelligence uh because we have high IQ and we're here to help you learn um so we'll get right back to that but before we do let's talk about center Flycast podcast is brought to you by Center.

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Corderoy's. Now let's get back to this self-help self-help self. Let's get back to this self-help podcast. The pro-sim, when I lost, I lost the Seth and the pro sim as well. And trying to think of who his team was. It was him. They were... Joe Woe.

Huskers. Yeah. And... Losing them pissed me off, too. But it was like, I was playing pretty good. So I was just like, there's nothing.

I feel like I really... I feel like... I was like, I think I played better than what I should have and we still were not going to win that. So it's like, I don't

really know what I could have done. Yeah. GGs. Right. I'm kind of mad that we lost. I wish we would have won, but it was just like, whatever, I could go to sleep. Yeah. But not this other one, this past one.

Yeah. And I think it's just like my old competitiveness of like, I used to pride myself of just like, okay, this is like, we're at the fucking tournament. Let's focus the fuck up. Let's make some plays. Let's play smart. And it was just, it was. So do you, does it make you like, average? I was so, like, disappointed in myself.

Does it make you miss competing, or are you like, this is why I fucking stopped? Like, it made me be like, realistically, I was so mad that I was like, I don't want to be a part of this. Like, I, you're going to drop out of the finals? Sort of. But obviously, I'm not. But in my head, I was like, I don't want to, I don't want to do this gaming shit. Like, I don't want to be a part of this. Like, it just makes me so, it made me so mad.

And I think it was more so of, like, I was. disappointed in myself like like I was just like you're just an average fucking L gamer than these days like you're not unless you get some God squad you're not going to win like you don't be making no plays no more like you're just average

as fuck then it was like that's how I was like looking at it and like that's what was getting me the mad the most mad it was like turny time it was my time to show up it was my time to make some plays and I did decent like I didn't shit the fucking sheets yeah

but I was just like, dude, like I just played so, like, I got it done so much more. Like, Seth came in here, he was like, you were playing pretty good. And I was like, no, I fucking wasn't. Like, I was, like, it wasn't completely failing. But, like, there's so much shit. And Seth was killing me every single time. That's the worst. I always run into him.

You go up against the pro. Like, I pop, if I go left and I pop out left, he's there. Right. Like, at the beginning, it was high rise, first round. I go bottom or I go our bottom B like I'm not thinking Seth's gonna be around

I go about to be a peak left don't see anything peak right don't see any peak left don't see anything and then I like just jump out right

and Seth was there just like ready for me I was just like I had a feeling someone was there but I jump out look right and I just get beamed I'm like dude

I didn't even like Seth's their bottom B yeah and it's just like that's how it's and just a few kills like that that and I'm like too why can't I like just like peek it but stay alive and it's just that happened for so many kills where Seth kills me I'm like I'm giving this dude freebies he's so

bad that's what I'm saying but I'm like he's fucking good as shit yeah I've been watching his POV and he's like he kind of he's kind of nasty at this fucking game Seth yeah dude he's but I'm like I'm giving this fucking new freebies like it's maniac calling dying to scump and I'm mad I'm giving this new free kills but like i don't know that's just how my brain goes like when i'm in the tourney and i just i'm not making like the right perfect play and it's i'm through my life away sometimes and then i don't know it just really got to me but we still got next week which will be the is it just a one day thing two day two day two day tournament yeah so it'll be a hundred grand it'll be like three rounds or four rounds first day and then the rest will be

the second day. What if I tee up for it? Don't tee up. Don't. No, I'm not. Fucking hell. It's hard. I mean, I've literally had zero thoughts about like taking Adderall again. It's just not even worth. Or would it be? I don't know. Oh, my God.

It just wouldn't fucking help. I think I'd take it and I would just fucking freak out. Oh, dude. If I told you. I can't believe I just did this. I broke. I broke it. Why? Why did I do that? And then you're really focused on how much of a loser you are you can't yeah i would not be good yeah that i think that's i'm more scared of it now than anything yeah i kind of had that like i don't know what it's been the last like few weeks but i just i felt so depressed like fell off running fell off working out i've lost 10 pounds my stomach hurts from vaping i felt so depressed my girl went out of town for like six days with her parents to like go buy horses and shit so it's just like it was like it was

literally me alone. Like Cod, here's how it started. Cold Duty came out and like people were, if you're in New Zealand, you can play now. And I was, I don't know,

I got one somehow. I played pubs for like two hours. And then I was like, um, and then like everyone started getting on. Scumms getting on. I was, and there goes my viewers.

And I was just like, I'm gonna get off here. And I was just like, that was fucking boring. And I don't give a shit about playing this game. I mean, I don't think I said that, but I was just like, all right, guys, I'm gonna get off here.

Game comes out tonight. I'm gonna be grinding. And yeah, I'll see you all tomorrow. And I just didn't stream again. It's been like two weeks. And I don't know, I just, the game came out. And I was like, I wasn't excited, but I was like, all right, this is going to give me something to do. Yeah.

And then I think when it came out and I saw everyone come back to Cod, And then saw like a little bit of a, and I don't even, I really didn't even give it a fair shot, but just like a little bit of viewer, viewers decreasing. And I was just like, dude, pubs? Am I gonna have to grind pubs?

I don't care about camos. I don't care about fucking pubs. Like, fuck, is this what I'm gonna have to grind the next like two months? Like this is not gonna go well. But it's like, all right, I'll be on tomorrow. Then like,

just later that night I just like felt like shit I was like fuck what am I going to stream like I know everyone's going to be streaming this and like this is going to hurt like my numbers which it's like I've gotten over to the point of like whether I have 100 viewers or like 500 viewers like if I'm going to stream I'm going to make it try to be entertaining and have a good time and if people are willing to tune in like I need to make it a good stream like I'm sort of over the numbers aspect but I'm like dude everyone's just going to be watching everyone else. Like, I'll play pubs, but it's like, I'm really not grinding.

Like, I'm not going to be like symphony and play for four. I think when the game came out, he was doing 16 hour days and then sleeping eight and then doing 16 hour. I was like, I'm not doing that. So no one's going to watch me play pubs for camos and shit. I was like, I'm not going to be getting into like the eight's lobbies. Everyone's going to be watching like the scumps, the nade shots, the who, symphony, whoever. I was just like, dude, I don't know if there's, like, dude.

I don't know if there's like, there's just nothing attracting me to this right now. It's just like, fuck, man, I'm going to be, I don't know what I am going to do. And then I just didn't stream for a few days. My girl was gone. Literally, I think I laid in bed for like five days. Just didn't feel good.

It was like not eating. It just like felt, I felt like I was withdrawing. And I don't know, the withdrawing from what? I mean, it wasn't withdrawing from anything, but like that feeling of like taking a bunch of Addy and then not and then just feeling like super sad like shit and like you don't want to leave your bed like I got that feeling again so much to the point where it's like nostalgic I was like wow this is a bad feeling to feel and it was just I literally just didn't move for like five days my fucking house turned into a mess I was just depressed

fucking I don't know some other shit and I was just like discused disappointed in myself in a lot of ways and I just fell into a fucking then that tourney the GGCS started and I was like all right I'm a guess I'll just start streaming this and get back into the daily streaming and then like woke up that morning sat down like that evening to like play some pubs and just I was so I just felt so depressed and I was just like dude I'm not in a mood to like turn on my stream play average or get shit on and to look over in my chat and it's just like oh my god or just like i was in such scum skump shit on you yeah and like usually i'm like fine with that like i'll minimize my chat if i'm playing or it's just like whatever like i get shit on fuck it i don't give a fuck but like i was just not in the mood i was just so down and it's been like that for like fucking two weeks now and i'm just like doing i've done nothing about it as far as like i know I know if I leave here, go work out, run, eat a healthy meal.

Tonight I'll be sitting there like, okay, tomorrow morning I'm waking up. I'm going to do the same shit. And then maybe I'll stream some like pubs or like play wagers with Pam or Bose. I know if I did that. Like that's how to regain positive fucking momentum in my life. But like it's just been at such a low fucking thing. And then I was like, at least we might win this. attorney and then if I can get to the finals or whatever and then lose that and I'm just like

my stomach hurt like couldn't sleep I was just like everything sucks just the most negative fucking thoughts and I know it's like all the rational things people are thinking right now of like maniac you oh no you lose attorney your life so I know but that still doesn't negate the fact that like I feel these things and like trust me I fucking know like I'm laying there I'm like this is fucking pathetic like no one actually gives a fuck like people who were tuned into the GGCS or like scum stream yesterday they don't give a shit about like they're not thinking of like damn BTH almost like have that or I wonder how maniac's feeling I'm on no one's mind like I am in I am so in my head about like just

this made up world of like sadness that we lost that fucking thing and just my past like two weeks of how I haven't worked out or gone to the gym and eating like shit and it's like dude no one cares but it's just another

I fell into it um need to snap out of it I have been feeling better lately finally got groceries clean the apartment and then we're trying to trying to get back

track because I was doing really well for a long time and this is why I don't this is why I I used to like tweet almost like ACV with like I have the answers and anxiety is this if you just do this your depression and anxiety but now it's like I don't have the fucking I I think I sort of have the answer but I like haven't I don't have the fucking answer because look at what? what I go through. Like just, it was literally like two weeks of me laying in fucking bed. And it's like, how do I have the nerve to like, like, I don't even tweet anymore. Because it's like, why, why should I even say fucking anything if like I haven't even

figured this shit out for myself? And yeah, that's where I've been at mentally the past few weeks. And it's- Dude, we did a 24-hour stream and I don't think I've recovered from it. I literally think that's the last time I'll ever do one. I haven't recovered. It's been like a week and a half. It's been like two weeks, actually.

How does that fuck you up that much? Dude, it's so bad. I don't know. I don't know if it's because I was dehydrated. Like, I didn't drink enough water. But, like, my throat is killing me. I've been, like, fatigued every day since. And, like, I'm leaving tomorrow to go to North Carolina for the holidays.

I'm like, dude, I got to put, like, I got to bring Mesa who's water. watching him and then and then go home and fucking drive from the airport to my mom's place. I'm like, dude, I'm, and I feel like trash. Like, I've been downing like emergency every day. Just really? Yeah. But, I mean, like, I just, I just feel sick like physically? Yeah, like super physically sick.

Which then turns into, and like I spent a month of the Lexus and now this month, I'm like alone at my house with Mace and the game came out so I'll spend like eight hours on Mono for 3 and then like walk Mace and then chill and then I'm just like dude what if what is and then like

I've thrown uh to six six days of tournaments in in eight days over the past eight days six of them have been tournament days. It's been fucking insane like it's been the

craziest kickoff ever um but i've like really enjoyed it obviously i'm super excited that i was able to do it um but uh it's a lot of work it's a lot of effort that's why when somebody comes into my chat and they're just like why did this happen why did you are you serious nat shot and skump on the same team you know just to use that example and i'm just like dude like i would I wish I could just put my brain. How does Hitch get these people to play? I wish I could just put... Where's Hitch getting the money from, L-O-L-O-L?

Dude, I saw a guy on Reddit saying Hitch is going to bleed optic dry with using the optic budget. There are so many things that could be changed money-wise. It's like when people say like, why is maniac even in optic? Is he actually getting a salary? What a fucking waste of money? I'm like, dude, there's a lot of things that could change. First of all, the money for GGCS and for these kickoff tournaments doesn't come from Optic. It might be a shock to many people, but it comes from Activision.

Activision has entrusted Optic for GGCS, and they've entrusted TST for, you know, the cutthroat and the pro sem. It's marketing budget from Activision. So I'm not going to Hector and saying, hey, man, can I borrow 300 grand? Like, that's not, anyway, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter because, like, Blake and George will be like, you got to stop, like, when people come in and they are complaining about something about the tournament, you got to stop, like, thinking about it or talking about it. You like doing it, though.

I don't like doing it. I don't, not when it comes to events. It depends. Not when it comes to events. If it comes, if it's content or if it's like, or if it's podcast or stream,

and they're like, damn, Hitch's laugh is so annoying. I'm just like, ha ha ha. Like, fuck you. You know what I mean?

Like, I'll just be funny about it. But like, dude, the amount of effort that goes into these fucking tournaments. And then like, hey,

I happen to watch Symfany's stream. So I'm Symfini's viewer. Symphony said he doesn't like the fact that he has to use this pistol. You know what I'm going to do? I'm going to go over to Hitch's stream. I can't believe you're making Symphony use this pistol. And that's just like a, that didn't actually happen.

It's just like an example of, of the kind of things that does happen. But I have to put myself in their shoes and be like, they don't know who I am. They don't know what has gone into this. They're just watching Symphony and Stephanie said, damn, this pistol sucks. And then they took it upon themselves to come into my chat. Yeah. And so I have to understand that. They're keyboard warriors.

I have to understand that. And I have to be zen. They think Symphony would have. appreciate that relaying that message but anyway that being said i know i know we've been like fucking bitching this whole pod but i'm i'm sick that's the fly cast i'm sick and you're angry my girl's grandpa or michel's grandpa got covid and like michel was with him like all week and i was like i hope i just get covid that's like that's where i was at i was like i hope i get covid so i can sit here another like week or two and just not fucking new.

Jesus. Here I am. Oh my God. Healthy. I need a dude. I was fucking killing it with the runs and shit. I got fast as fuck. I should show you my Strava.

Like I've been on my run shit, but these past let's say past two weeks I haven't, past two weeks I haven't done shit. Past three weeks. Dude, I started slowing down, but I was on my fucking shit. Dude, I have to get back to it so bad, like, so bad. I think I ran like seven miles in like a 850 pace. I ran three miles at like a 720 pace. Yeah, you showed me that.

Like, I was on, I've been on my shit kind of. Dude, I was like, I was watching one of the around the bars I did with Castro that's about to come out. I was looking at myself and I was like, fuck, dude, I lost it all. What are you like chubby? So ugly now. You're skinny fat now. I'm so fucking... And uglier.

I feel like I'm getting uglier. I'm getting just flappier. Older and... Older. More d'ogyn. More... Not entertaining. Not fun to watch.

Fucking a piece of shit. A loser. Bad dog dad. Bad dog dad. Horrible son. That was one of them. My mom called me like twice and I just looked at it. Oh.

And it doesn't make sense. Like it's not like my mom's gonna even kill my vibe It's not like me and my mom ever had beef I think my mom is my number one person So I get so depressed And like anxious That's what it is for me Yeah kind of text me sometimes

I just don't want to talk to anyone My mom will text me sometimes And I'm in such a bad like mood Or I'm like so all over the place That I know if I talk to her I would either worry her or I would bring her down I've been hitting my vape so much my like stomach hurts and shit like

I remember I was in my bed ripping my vape this was we're just ranting now this was like this was like day five of day four or five of like laying in bed doing fucking nothing I ripped the shit out of my vape I'm like oh my god I hit that too hard I'm like

and then my mom calls I'm like I was like there's no way I could pick up this fucking call and like literally my mom is my favorite person in the world and like my number one and love her and I just don't know what it is I've just

My mom will text me and ask me a question and I like read it and then I'm like okay I'm gonna respond to that when I have the answer and then I forget to respond and then she'll just her second bump is just like hey I love you and I'm like oh god my mom will send me these like I love you too

like Facebook like poems like you are my son my two to my children just crying just to my children my the most important things of my life I couldn't imagine life without my son my stars my

just like some shit like that I'm like you're just fucking like I'm just sitting there in like dirty underwear pizza box chewy as shit on the steps Milo hasn't pissed since two days go. Junior's bowl hasn't been fed.

Oh my God. No, I'm just kidding. I don't do. If there's one thing that gets done, and I'm not, I get depressed, but the animals get fed and they get taken out. Yeah, same.

It actually keeps me going, like, keeps me going now. Because before Mace, I would have just stayed in bed. Oh, this morning, my alarm went off at, like, nine.

Because I had the podcast at 10. I was like, fuck. I was like, I'm going to sleep till, like 9.30, then just take a quick shower and then head over. And then Michelle at like 920, he was like, hey, you got to go. I'm late for a meeting.

She was like, take the dogs out whenever you get up, please. I was like, fuck. I was like, I don't have, I have time, but that means I have to get up now. And I want to lay here for another 10 minutes because it like, it's kind of like, it's like a 5, 10 minute trip with them fucking outside. I was like, now I have to get up now. and she leaves and I just get to get up

take them out cold bring it back in shower and then it's the day started but they are like just unconditional I love just laying there

in like the evening or even like last night when I was so pissed and like chewy who's like bigger now but he's just like the softest like most friendly dog

and he's just laying on the bed beside me like kind of smiling. You're just like, he's just so happy to fucking, just the most unconditional love.

It doesn't matter if I, if I, if I whipped his butt earlier for chewing the fuck out of my shoe. Like, he's just laying there smiling and it's kind of taking a nap. And I just grab him.

And I'm like, this is reality. This is real. Like, losing in the finals, kind of doesn't exist. I was like, this is actually.

reality. I'm just like whole chewy I try to and I feel him softened in my arm I'm just like this is what life's about and then I pick up my phone and I go on Twitter and I see Nate shot

saying $20,000 champions with the trophy I go on Twitch I scroll down recommended streams I see dropped Apex ranked after dominating GGCS he's rewatching

Pomages rebroadcasts and then I get fucking pissed again. Oh man. But it's all good. I'm gonna get my lick back. It's all good. No, we'll see next week, man. I try to have

I do have fun with these and I'm like I'm excited when it comes up and it's game day or whatever. Yeah. That's just how it goes, man. At my somewhere deep, deep down, there's a little kid inside of me who loves the competitive.

and has a lot of passion. It comes out rarely. But maybe I should just, maybe I should embrace it when it does. All good. Next week got. Happy Thanksgiving. Happy Thanksgiving.

Next week we're locking in. Thank you guys for watching the Flycast. I know I just been giggling, but it was just, I feel like that was therapeutic for me. Because I feel like I've had such a fucking crazy two weeks. Bro, I did a fucking... Just sitting here and...

I did an ad read for better help for the podcast. And I, like, started babbling. I was like... I literally stopped myself after, like, four sentences. I was like, let me just read this fucking ad. And Matt Craig started laughing. Holy shit. All right.

That's gonna do... All right, guys. Album of the week. Hold you. Album of the week is... Andre 3,000. thousand's flute album is it good it's just like it's just like flutes and naturey music no words dude that's the album of the week i don't know what no offense 130 000's one of the top five rappers

ever like and then i pick up my phone jukin sends me the call sheet for next week and i'm just he just thumbs it down dude he made a flute album his debut album album is a flute album. Anybody else? I know he's upset. I know that he thinks he can't rap about things now that he's 40 or 50, however old he is.

I would listen to, I would listen to that man rap about fucking replacing drywall. If he would, he would be like dry wall, high ball to high balls. I'm not,

I would listen to him rap about, taking his kids to school. I would listen to him rap about doing his taxes. I would listen to him rap about anything that a 50 year old man

would do or rap about like wise things. Nas is still rapping and he's being wise. Andre 3000 can rap. I don't know why he doesn't want to rap, man.

He's so... I fuck with it, Andre. I understand. Dude, he's so good. He's the best. He's the best. Some new interviews

came out. with him. I haven't seen him yet, but he said he knows that people are going to be upset because it's not rap. And I'm not upset. I mean, if he likes to play the fucking flute, play the flute. But like, he has said multiple times now that he's older, he doesn't know what

to rap about. And I'm like, dude, listen to that fucking, that special track on blonde is insane. Now I'm solo that I can see. I know this kind of but aunt. I'm solo that I don't get a high no more when I get run on. I just go, that is in. But like, I hope he's good at the flute, you know. I hope he's good at the flute.

Well, new blue sun is out now by Andre 3000. I can't wait to listen to it. Album of the week. It is kind of chill, though. I'm not mad at it. I'm going to listen to it. I'm going to love it. All right, y'all. Appreciate you all tuning in. Until next time, Matt, Craig. Play that outro music.