The Herd with Colin Cowherd - Jenkins and Jonez - All-Star Weekend Reactions and a Mush vs. Slap Debate

Episode Date: February 21, 2022

The guys discuss the show that Steph Curry put on in the All-Star game before LeBron James’s game-winner. Then they discuss Mike Tirico. Then they discuss Juwan Howard’s mush after the Michigan-Wisconsin game, why Mike is owed an apology, the sham of a dunk contest, and much more.  Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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to hang out with the Jenkins and Jones boys. You are the youngest by like 10 years talking about, I want to do this in a timely manner, guys. Do you know what hour it is right now? No, okay, I'll get you. I'll get you. I just think it's hilarious that the dynamic of the show is there's three dudes in their fucking late 40s

and then a like school mom guy in his mid-20s who's like responsible for trying to corral us into a job. It's so funny. It's supposed to be the other way around, Jackson. This is not tenable, bro. Untenable. It's untenable. It's untenable.

Untenable. It's an all-star weekend. We just finished watching the game. We're very excited to talk about all the different shits from the game. As always, Jenkins & Jones, hosted by Dragonfly Jones, aka Tyler. Everybody, have a good. LeJethro Jenkins, aka John. What's up, Bubbas?

And I am smacked right now and dead set on ruining this fucking podcast tonight. I am settled. Not if I beat you to him. I am. Tyler smack too. We double smack. You know what I mean?

Before the episode started, I had to negotiate with John's wife what he's going to do in return for waking up their baby tonight by being an asshole on the podcast. I said I'm not going to be loud and they looked at me like. I said, I literally said, put her on the, I said, put her on the, put her on the mic right now so we could talk about it. So he's doing two weeks of baby laundry in exchange for this hour of enjoyment you're about to get. Bro, y'all owe me, gee. Baby laundering will be whooping my ass, dog.

Them fucking baby socks. I'm supposed to be responsible enough to handle that shit. Baby laundry is like trying to sweep sand off of something, bro. It's like you do one load of laundry and it's 7,000 items in the-baving after the beach. It's like three days later you're finding sand and crevices. How is there more sand in my ass crack a week after we came home from the beach? Right. Golly.

Okay, that was... I'll say this, beach overrated experience. Am I lying? You have to clean up afterwards. And at least in LA. If you're going to Florida, the beaches are so nice. You get in the water.

That helps with the cleanup. The Atlantic Ocean is fucking disgusting compared to the Pacific Ocean. I'm talking about the Gulf, the Gulf, Florida. I'm talking about the golf, baby. I think any shared aquatic space It's overrated. Like, you know,

fucking beaches, pools, hot tubs or whatever, because you're all just stewing in each other's crotches juices in ammo. You know what I'm saying? Pools are damn to be illegal.

Yeah. The fact that they let us swim in the same juices as other humans. Well, they have to put acid in there. They're like, you guys can all get in here together, but we have to pour a certain amount of acid in.

Right. Corrine. We shouldn't be able to swim in Corrine to keep a fucking, because everybody's sweating. nasty jumping in that bitch. That shit should be illegal. Right.

Right. I used to pee in that motherfucker. I'm going to get on here and tell the truth tonight because I'm I. The lifeguard told me when I was eight. If you pee in the pool, the water is going to turn green. I looked him dead in his eyes and I said, no, it didn't. Okay. Did it.

Tyler. No, not no it won't. Goddy. Not no it won't. Gotty. Got him. Tyler, you ain't ever pee in the pool. Oh, of course.

Okay. Yeah. Right. Right. It's not the same as peeing in the shower. You know what I mean? Very different. Even though I've done that a couple times too.

All right. Let's talk about the All-Star game. We just finished watching. Great game from Steph Curry, but LeBron hit the game winner. It was so fun, man. Steph made 16-3s. That's fucking preposterous, bro.

Ball of the fuck out. And I love Steph winning All-Star Games. Because it's like, when you saw him, him come out during the introductions and he was just soaking in the booth. He was like, yes, I love this. Thank you. Thank you.

And then during the game, he was hitting those threes and just like, look, and set a crowd after it. Looking through the crowd before that shit even dropped. Like, you know what I'm saying? I just love it. It was just a reminder of how fun sports hate can be if we're just not fucking be ridiculous and stupid and, you know, if it's not real hate. Right.

You know what I mean? Yes. I know as soon as they boot him, you knew he was going to have a game. Right, right, right. Go nuclear. I think they should make, like, a museum exhibit of Steph looking away from the basket as the ball goes in the basket. I would pay top dollar to go to one. I think that's, it's beautiful.

But, like, when he goes nuclear, Gene, there's nobody funner. Has there ever been anybody funnier that you watch when they've gone nuclear? Like, even LeBron. LeBron was just, like, amazed. right but you see like even the players are having fun like they're there in like they look like us watching them when they're watching step do step shit you know what I'm saying yeah it's does that make any sense it makes a complete sense because it's more fun because you couldn't imagine yourself in that moment in a way you couldn't with with brawn right like like bronze moments

consists of him fucking driving to the cup and dunking on three fucking six nine dudes and we can't do that right that's superhero shit we see that on television right Right. And Stesimo was consists of him just fucking putting up a ridiculous shot, fading away on like two defenders. And we can see ourselves doing that. You know what I'm saying? So we could see ourselves trying.

Trying that. We could even see ourselves trying what Braun did. So there's a difference. That makes sense. Yeah, I think that's a big part of it. Definitely. I just think it's so fun. Like the All-Star game is just one of my favorite events in sports,

even if you, like, factoring it everything that happens in sports. because those dudes have so much fucking fun playing basketball together. And it's so, like, watching Janice realize, okay, I came here and I was kind of thinking maybe this will be a statement game where I win MVP. And watching him realize, oh, Steph's going crazy. And there was one point where he had a dunk and he turned around and gave it back to Steph. Like, that's so fun to see dudes of that caliber, just having fucking fun together like that. And you see how excited Janus gets when he's around stuff. Like he's not in the NBA.

You know what I mean? There was something someone like, Janus is always around Stepp as an entire weekend. And there's like 78 pictures of Janus right behind Steph. Before Janus signed that extension, I was shook that Janus would have wanted to go to Golden State. Because she would, bro, lock up the next five seasons if that would have happened.

Oh, my God. Gee. I wish, I also think the All-Star game, everyone can remember what it was like to be a kid, loving basketball watching when you see just the fucking freaks of nature on that floor and i got to enjoy vincent realizing that brawn and step and yannis were on the same team and it was like it was like it was like he played NBA jam for the first team you know what i mean he just he was like he was like brawn and step and yonis when does this happen like there's just no way it's

going to happen right it never occurred to him you know what i mean in that way that it was like They're all in the same team. He really realized what the All-Star game was. He feels like, you know what I mean? It's cool, man. It's just fucking fun. And then Braun calling for the ball. He was like, Steph got a chance to win it.

And he bricked it. He got to the elbow. He called for the ball. He licked his fucking fingers. COVID violation. COVID violation. Jesus Christ, Brian. He already beat it twice.

He's had every strain, gee. That would have been cool as fucking 2017. But, no. Right, right, right. You had to beat COVID three times already. You relax, you know what I mean? Look at your fingers? What the fuck?

You think this is 2019? What, wait? Shit. That is not cool. It was a relic of a bygone era. The finger lick. Right before the game winner the whole, everybody, like the whole crowd gasped, like, oh my God.

What did you guys think of the halftime presentation, getting all the dues on the stage and shit. I thought it was as perfect as that ceremony could have gone. I think the NBA does a really good job of giving flowers to their guys where they can smell them. I think that no matter how you feel about NBA coverage, whatever the way, whatever the fuck. The way that the NBA kind of, you know, exhaust their legs. Tyler is so smacked.

I can't get off. The way. Tyler is fucking cooked right now. The motherfuckers sound like he underwater, gee. Like, God damn. He's talking through water bubbles. Come on, man. We got it.

But yes. I was saying the way that the NBA like exhausts their living legends is commendable. I was going to leave it at that. I felt like that shit was long, gee. I was high as fuck. I'm like, man, this is a lot of half.

I felt like the halftime show was as long as I I have. It shouldn't be that long. I love giving people flowers and all that shit too. Also, one other thing, Shaq, stop it, baby. You gotta stop it.

You're nasty. You look real nasty with that little tongue wag. God, you see the way? That's cute dog shit, though, man. That ain't no Q dog shit. I see my dad, they stick their tongue out.

This motherfucker looked like he. You ain't, you ain't see this? That shit, bro. That shit, bro. I can smell that. Stop it, Shaq. We also got the moment of Ray Allen walking up the steps,

dapping up Braun with Tyler mentioned it. They took that, they took that dap out of the fucking safe deposit box, the fucking bank. And then just goes right past KG. KG sucked his lips into the back of his throat to stop himself from slapping the fuck out of that dude. That wily coyote shit. Bro,

Kijie. It's time to grow up though, right? Like, you're really still this mad over that? That's not a good look at this point. You know what I mean? It doesn't matter if it's a good look if that's how you really feel. If you're like, fuck this motherfucker forever, doesn't really matter how other people feel.

So it got to be fuck this motherfucker forever. Why not? You don't feel that way about a handful of people? Because I do. I do. I don't hate a single person, but there's like 3,000 motherfuckers where I'm like, fuck them forever.

for multiple reasons. But yes, I do have those people. There's some dudes that if it's my wedding, if it's there putting me in the Hall of Fame, whatever, you see that person and you just, you're not here. Right, right, right, right. Yeah.

I actually, that's one of the things I love about it because what Tyler said is exactly right. Like, it's a family thing. It's a reunion when they get all those dudes together. And at least in my family, you have more than three people in a room. at least two of the people in there hate each other. So that's like, really?

That's what Christmas Eve and Thanksgiving is supposed to be. One part of the table doesn't talk to the other part of the table, whatever the fuck it is. I love that shit. That was so funny to me. Y'all be hating each other, y'all family. We got a couple people who. I mean, I guess we got the same shit.

It's the same shit when I really think about it. You know what I'm saying? There's some cousins that you like, I fuck with them, but they don't fuck with each other. You know what I mean? You know what's on site every time we see you. The difference is you want to have a TNT producer putting those two people next to each other for the photo. Right, right, right.

Trying to get that engagement up, you know what I mean? Let's talk about Cleveland. John, you were in Cleveland, and you had the hot take of all hot takes from frozen Cleveland. I am coming here. Less than 24 hours from Cleveland, okay? Yes, it was cold, but I'm standing on this. I was talking shit about Cleveland. I apologize.

It's a nice little city. You know what I mean? Very friendly. Tyler, Mm-hmm. Very friendly. Very friendly. Very friendly.

Let me finish my statement. Actually, fuck what I'm saying, really. I just want to play you back. Everything you said to me after I said, I like the skills challenge, starting with, that's the white shit you ever said. I want to play all that back at you right now. Look, dude, I think it's a very inviting, what's that skyline? Very inviting skyline.

They have soldiers like engraved on their bridges. This is a positive? You're listening positives right now. It's interesting. It's interesting, right? You know, they got to go. And then we get to real shit. They got a little popping bar scene.

You know what I'm saying? Really friendly people, you know, and the food is really good. So like, honestly, most, like I said this on Twitter. cities aren't vacation cities. Like, what, what cities do you really want to leave LA to go to? You know what I'm saying? Do we want to, you know what I mean? Not very many. So like, what do you look at when you go to most cities? What do you think? Are the people good? Is it food good? They got, you know, it's a drinking cool. You feel me? And that's what they got. It's a cool little Midwest city. The architect is cool. It's growing. I saw a lot of construction. I like it. I'm not

mad at it, bro. It reminded me of the career. Maybe that's why, too. Remind me in St. Louis a little bit. You're just homesick is what it was. That's funny. You were at a middle, you were at a little dinky-ass Midwest town. Well, if I had to go work at Cleveland again, I wouldn't be sad. Well, Indianapolis, bro. Like I said, I, I hit the gas leaving Indy, G. I was like, put this dumpster fire behind me, ashy-ass city.

Shelby-Bill-ass-City. Right, right. K.D. Ankle-ass-ass city, G. You feel what I'm saying? Bro, not a bottle of lotion in the tires place. Dicca, fuck that shit, gee. Bro, I'm asking about lunch. Where can I go from lunch?

They're talking about some subway. Subway, I'm new to your city, and that's what you tell me to go get lunch at. Where can I get some good lunch? Well, we got a subway just built around a quarter. Bitch. Bro, you don't get that. I don't even like the way subway smell. You know?

Shit, I got PTSD from Subway. out of here. There's a subway around the corner. $5.00 footloat. I should have left this. Eat a meatball son, nigga. I'm an adult. I'm sorry.

I don't eat those. The fuck. Tyler's not going to ever physically recover. He's not going to physically recover from someone welcoming John by recommending a subway. What happened? Tell us Jackson. I got two. I have an almost identical story to that.

But, but, like, mine, I wasn't in Indianapolis. I was in a place where there should be good food. I was in North Carolina, and I was, like, really excited to, like, get barbecue. My first time ever in North Carolina with my buddy, and we're staying at his, like, family friend's house. And they're like, oh, we'll take you to our favorite spot for dinner tonight. I'm thinking it's going to be some fucking amazing local spot, right? We pull up to Red Robin, bro.

They took you to software. That goddamn onion ring tower and shit That's fine dining out there Like I'm like 18 years old I'm like I'm like okay like like It's probably free dinner for me Red Robin's not that bad But I was really expecting us to go to some like

Real North Carolina like spot Right right right They got beef ribs you know what I'm saying They they pour They have like the what do they have like the what they call like a beef sandwich a rib sandwich and it's just ribs and fucking bread That's what part of North Carolina news and this sounds like some Asheville shit bro It was like Durham. It was like outside it was like Chapel Hill Durham time Durham is so black bro

The white they got hella barbecue spot still The widest thing in Durham is Duke University Durham is super black That's the home of North Carolina Central like Durham is black That's wow Oh man The fact that you said Dorm is that black

Makes me feel that much worse For being a Duke fan I found the one white thinking Dorman rooted for it For damn their 20 years That's some bullshit You didn't know any better man I'm gonna go back and slap the shit out of 10 year old me

Who fell in love with fucking Bobby early Let me explain to you what segregation is You little shit Right You know how much shit She's going to give for this in 25, dig it? Did you guys watch the TNT or the TBS broadcasts? TBS.

That was the one with Shaq and the, yeah. I watched. I was too high to know. I'm trying to think. I had to watch it with Shaq and them. I had to side one. I had to side one. Yeah.

So that was a TV. Okay, that's what I was. They gave us a fucking Greek mythology conundrum with that shit. It was like Kevin Harlan was on the TNT shit. Best play by play guy. And then they gave us like the color crew was Wade and Reggie, which is like, fuck no.

You know what I'm saying? And then, and then on TBS, they gave us the best color crew guy with fucking, with Chuck and Shaq and fucking Kenny, right? And I was like, wow. They gave us Reggie.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, let me put it. It's like this. You know, for whatever reason, and this is one of the stupidest things that happens on Twitter when they do the what table would you sit at?

Like, what a weird? thing. What a weird thing to ask about everything. It's like that. And I would say for me, there's good people in both parties, right? But Reggie on TV to me is the guy that it's like, oh, he's going over there. I would just go to the other one no matter. Regardless of who's in the other one. It can't be worse. That's some wild shit to say about Reggie. You got to give me a finals or an Eastern or conference game seven. And Kevin Harlan and Reggie for me to be like, okay, I might need to go over there.

Because Kevin Harlan is that good. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right? But for an also game, hell, no. Give me the furthest away from the game seven. The bass, the ball goes through the bottom of the net and I'm hitting mute. You know what I mean?

I want Kevin Harlan, but without the Donovan Mitchell, this is your code act moment. Fuck out of here. There's pictures with a camera since 2007, dog. Right. You know what the fuck? This is your Kodak moment. They probably don't even use that anymore, Kodak. You feel me?

Fuck out. He's the only one still saying Kodak moment. Kodak, like, what the fuck did you talk about? Weird-ass, d'nig? I really hope. I got a good suit or bad suit, Drey Monde. Bad suit. Bad suit.

Chuck, bro. Was it Chuck or Shackle in his ass? Someone was like, hey, I just wanted to let you know that, um, you got like the flag of the Trinidad and Tobago. I think it was Chuck. He said he had a Trinidad. He said he, was it Trinidad and Tobago?

Was it fucking Turks and whatever the fuck? I don't know. He looked at his head and said he had that. He said he got a Caribbean flag. He said that man had a two nation one, one island. One island flag suit, which was true as fuck. That's exactly what it looked like. Yeah, that's not my, I mean, I just, you know, well, okay, we do.

So the only thing I was going to say, what are we talking about? Hold on, hold on. Where are we at? I hope, hold on. I'm going to go home. I'm trying to land the plane. Mommy. I'm high.

I'm tired. Please come get me. I want more alternate broadcasts with fun people talking. about sports. I want more of it. I want it for every fucking sport. You might turn me into a major league baseball fan with that shit. Get the right people talking shit watching a baseball game together and not this stuffy fucking shit. Like it doesn't work anymore. Kids are grown up on Twitch. Everyone's used to funny commentary on fucking everything. Make it fun. And if you want to, if you want to put those three dudes with Kevin Harlan and just have it

change the ratio of good play-by-play to fun shit, that's cool. But you got to stop. acting like people are tuning in for fucking Mike Tarrico, bro. It's not happening. Bro. Put some funny fucking people on there, bro. Can you believe he thought he was Italian? That nigger looked at that nigger face and said, I'm just one of the boys. Bitch, if you don't shut your weird ass up, ball head ass, nigger, horseshoe head ass,

nigga. You are a nigger, okay? Fuck you me, dog. This motherfucker will really sad. Just what the fuck said? He was Italian. Bitch, only thing Saucs about you was that nose, motherfucker. The biggest lie.

The biggest I gave was, I didn't know I wasn't Italian. He told me I wasn't. Motherfucking, you got called a nigga in fucking first grade, dog. At the latest. He looked around like, who we call him a nigga? Point the nigger out. Jumping. Let's get that.

You got a jackson. You got to cut all this shit, right? This Bronx tail ass motherfucking Italian. Get him out of this. Why is he in our neighborhood? Bro, don't cut this. Do not cut this.

We're keeping this. We're keeping this shit. Jackson. That brown-ass fucking almond cashew of a human that said that he didn't know he was black growing up. He said everyone treated it.

Everyone treated him. He said Italian treated him. Like he was. That brown singer thought he was a motherfucking gold singer. Muley wasn't his brown-ass-catshoe-ass life. But he wasn't to believe. I'm telling you, he was looking around like who they called that. I'm telling you.

Where's the Mooli at? Morris a Mouliette. It's foot to face for that motherfucker. You brown bitch, we're going to get you. Where's that fucking cash? face-ass motherfucker. Where's that brown motherfucker with like a flexion that people are saying? Looks like mine.

Oh, shit. That motherfucker. He is the only big liar or the most oblivious person who ever was playing. He's one of those, one of the two. Bro, I read that shit and I just, I'm like, damn, bro, you a movie character, G. You know what I'm saying? Fuck you mean. It's like the 90s.

motherfucker really thought. Jackson, are we cutting this? No. We're going to do this right. If you're not

cutting it, I won't make the, okay, I'm not going to make the joke I was going to make. Okay.

Yeah. Please. And Mike's Italian. He know what time it is. Oh, that's, let's talk about. That brown ass man

said he moved to the Italian world and never experienced. And never got caught. called a moolie or a gambazzuni or whatever the fuck. Did you never see niggas? He didn't know what black people were.

He's like, who? He was like, black? What is that? Your brown ass, man. And look, bro, we've seen them little, we've seen them little peas on your goddamn weekend. Shit you got going on your head. That is not a guy in a fucking way.

That shit is some nigger not. It's some nigger not on that motherfucker. That dude. That dude had a fro. He had a pro that it trimmed down. Right, right. I'm just a little different. Nicker really thought he had a bit of LIGO.

Fuck me. That motherfucker didn't know he was a nigger, looking at his face to hold his old life. He's a liar, man. He's a liar. He's a liar. He grew up in the biggest family of liars ever. Ever, ever.

Ever. And I'm more glad to believe he's the biggest. lie because that's one person was like 40 people who had to lie to him. He didn't know he was black. Bro, that's not even a race, bro. It's your color of your skin literally,

dog. Bro, you cannot see that you're black. What the fuck? Oh, shit. Yeah, yeah, we've been goddamn going in on Mike Tiroko week ahead for like 15 minutes. Black is definitely race.

I don't know what the fuck I was saying. It's not even a race. It's exactly what it is. Bro was like 46 years old saying, this is the first time I've heard of being called. An Italian. What was he putting on his teacaps and shit? This standardized test.

What? White? Was he put other? I'm Italian. That motherfucker look like Nate McMillan. But honestly, y'all can keep that motherfucker. We don't want them, okay? Yeah, for sure.

That's the thing. We do not. I got news for you. The Italians probably know. He just didn't know it. He thought Muley was his nickname. Mike the Muley Tiroko. My name's Mike, but my friends call me Muley.

Okay, all right. Okay. Oh shit. Oh, shit. Mike the movie. Oh, shit. Mike the movie's reed.

Oh, shit. Bro, we got to keep this, bro. This is an old throwback Jigs and Jones pod. Bro. This before we got that color money. We ain't never going on. Jackson,

clip this out and let us upload it with no context to the Patreon, bro. No, we got Mike. All right. Okay. All right.

Okay. You can't put this shit on the podcast. Bro, Josh calling him the N word with the R. Bro, I've said that 17 times. I say the hard hard 17 times. You can't a fucking podcast. This one ain't no different. This one is different because you're talking about a white man.

Oh, man, I think he's a white man. I'm talking about a nigger. That's what I'm talking about. It's a racial slur when you say it about an Italian man, bro. It's a racial slur. I guess. I guess. Lord have mercy.

We wild nose for sure. We do. They want. All right. Let's see. Come on. Come on. Let's.

Y'all getting 45 minutes out and be sold. Okay. Hold on. Better keep this. We better keep that shit. Oh, shit. That nigga brown as fuck. And he's,

bro. God damn. Bro. He thought, he saw his. face every day. How do you ignore that? He lied so good.

He lied to himself and forgot he lied and told the lie to us and was like, oh yeah, I lied to myself when I was seven, nigga. I forgot. I am black. What the fuck? That man looks like Sherman Hemsley. And he

viewed himself as Rocky Marciano. In 76, Rocky one. That's who we viewed himself ass when he was 1987 fucking Sherman Hemsley Digger

dog fuck you me bad motherfucker bro your hair long receded in the way that only black men's hairline receded Right men do not have the fucking peninsula like You got the Carl Winslow

hairline G you feel me You know what I mean The fucking golfing your motherfucking top of your head That's how we do that Gee we the only ones to keep the horseshoe you feel me

bro what's crazy is I can't even say this alright I was gonna do that I'm talking about family I'm talking about family we got it let's move on

oh shit that's a family joke let's talk about Jared Allen's fashion hold up one last thing one last thing one last Tirico was such an outrageous

human being that he's sidetracked this entire podcast for like 20 minutes where we just couldn't believe that he was what we said he was that was what we talking about for 20 minutes right here we cannot believe you are who you say you are you want us to believe that you are who you say you are like we don't know which is more audacious and we cannot reach a conclusion in 20 minutes or what was the most outrageous part of all of this Right, bro. Oh, shit.

And we talk about so many outrageous things. We argued over rats and squirrels. And this is the most outrageous shit that we talked about in the podcast, an actual man's life. We didn't know if a whole family lied to this man or if this man just lied to a whole world. Bro, drop the Netflix, Doc. We need 10 episodes. The ESPN Swindler, bro. We need all this shit, man.

God damn. No one. called you a moly in your whole ass Italian black ass you brown as fuck too dog what if I told you this brown Italian never got called him

right right I told you we going to ruin it Tyler Tyler we said we're going to ruin this pod then we said he's going to ruin this episode the episode is ruined we did it congratulations

High five, my boy. We did it. We ruined it. Let this bitch ride. Men of our words, men of honor. No, but seriously. Lions over sheet. Let this whole,

lion's over shit. Let this whole shit ride because this is a fucking, this is fan service of the motherfuckers who are with us. This is 2015. Right, right. This is who they subscribe to. You feel me? Okay.

All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. Let's progress. Now we're here.

Was that, Bubba's. Really just did that. Okay. Okay, a question. I'll do the next topic in the form of a question. Do you think that Tony Morrison's the bluest eye was written about Mike Tariko? I love that. All right, okay, all right.

Let's talk about Jared Allen's outfit and whether it was the trashest outfit ever or whether it's better to be comfortable than to be fashionable. John, you have opinions about clothes. Mr. McFashion himself. Mr. Fire shirt I still stand on that thing Right Right

Fuck what everybody says Anyway What I think is Bro I don't give a fuck With Jared Adler hat on Also at the same time though Like bro He looked like a substitute teacher

It's okay if we clown him Ain't nobody say he Ain't anybody come in him personally You just look goofy out there With the motherfucking IT shoes you got on gee You feel what I'm saying? Here's my whole thing.

Did he look goofy or did he look like he was too rich to be dressed in the way he was dressing? He looked. I mean, to me, if I looked at that motherfucker dressed like that, I'm like, who this nigga in this thin-ass hoodie? You know what I mean? That's a T-shirt, bro. That is an April hoodie. I can see your insides through that hoodie, bro.

That is not a favorite-rave-sleeve-hook, bro. That is an April-ass thing. In Cleveland hoodie, you fucking? Yeah. But, I mean, like, I mean, it wasn't it wasn't the worst. first I've ever seen, but also I don't, I think them dudes that be dressing up like, like gunning them, that should be tacky.

You know what I mean? Them big ass balenciagas you shit, them big ass shoes do not look good. You know what I mean? So not, I mean, I don't want them to do that, but at the same time, like, don't look like you work the, you know, the line of Trader Joe's, you feel what I'm saying?

Like, if you want to look like that, I should be able to clown you. It's a dude is the Lombie Trader Joe's who wears that exact fit every Friday. Whoa, don't they give them shoes out When you, when you, like, that's the first thing they give you, a Trader Joe's T-shirts. A fucking, right.

A thin-ass Trader Joe's fucking hoodie. Bro, I'm telling you. I mean, I think it was weird when people were, like, getting, taking it so serious, right? Like, when you're, like, talking, be coming from, like, a moral standpoint to us clown in his clothes, dude, relax. It's, it's an H&M fucking fit.

You know, like, let's not argue over $24, G. You know what I mean? Like, I don't know, but, boom. What you got to do, like, Jared Allen who doesn't fuck with anybody? Like, can we not protect some fucking sense of purity on the internet? You know what I'm saying? Can we not fuck with people who don't fuck with other people? Can we not do that?

Yeah, but yeah, yeah. But it's when it's like, y'all don't be paying y'all rent. Yeah, yeah. That's stupid. Okay, that's stupid, yes. Come on, man. It ain't that big of a deal. You know what I'm saying?

Right. Guys is clapping back. Right. And sometimes, nigga, you want them, you still want them George. Even though you broke, you just got to, you know, push it off to him. I've done it when I was a boy, too. I was still in George's in college and shit. But yeah, so that was weird.

I hear what you're saying, though. Like, nobody bothers them. I didn't get no jokes off with them. You know what I mean? So I can, but I'm not mad at the jokes. I laughed at them. You know what I mean? Let the 16-year-olds talk they shit.

I, yeah, and I, you know, some of them was 16-year-olds. Some of it was people doing the, you know, I don't know. You're right. The most tiresome shit is the, this is how, you know, rich people dress. You know, Mark Zucker for $20. Like, no, Mark Zuckerberg wears $400 shirts that look like $20 shirts. Bro, they wear common projects like they're fucking slippers. They have abs sewn onto the inside of them.

Bro, rich people live richly. Fuck what you mean. You know what I mean? I am in favor of people dressing as comfortably as possible at all times. And I appreciated him being like, I don't give a fuck. But I was on his side until he said, though, what do they want me to do? Wear a $5,000 chain. He still, he don't know he rich yet, dude.

He don't know what he's. rich means like bro you're soon to be worth a hundred mill you know what I mean you're gonna get a bag you are good a basketball you know what I mean five thousand you should you should be wearing a four hundred thousand dollar chain that looks like some fucking ten dollar shit out of clairs that us broke motherfuckers wouldn't know it's a four hundred thousand dollars shit like that's how you should really flex on us it's gold that's been passed through the intestines of a billionaire like some you know like it's a regular looking gold chain but it actually was mined on jupiter or whatever the fuck

Ocho Sinko got it right. Ocho Sinko got it right. He said, I buy my shit from Clare's. What are you going to say, I ain't got it? You know what I mean? Are you going to know if they're the real ones or not? I do got some real ones, but I got some from Clarets. Who would say, you know, you got a diamond checker on you, you feel me?

Like, so I would play it that way, you know what I mean? But I don't, it's not a big deal. As well, we're in general, we're in chiefs so can't in the time in the time. Now, we have to ensure them more safe our best

our time we're doing the most important is the child to get rid of COVID-19 the

vaccine. The vaccine to be determined to the child's and see your health and visit your

doctor to visit to you future to the California Department of Public

Health back by the adoption of teens from foster care is a topic not enough

people know about and we're here to change that. I'm April Dinnwity host of the new podcast, Navigating Adoption, presented by Adopt U.S. Kids. Each episode brings you compelling real-life adoption stories told by the families that live them with commentary from experts. Visit Adoptuskids.org slash podcast or subscribe to navigating adoption presented by Adopt U.S. Kids. Brought to you by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services Administration for Children and Families and the Ad Council. And we're live here outside the Perez family home just waiting for the And there they go. Almost on time this morning. Mom is coming out the front door strong with a double-arm

kid carry. Looks like Dad has the bags. Daughter is bringing up the rear. Oh, but the diaper bag wasn't closed. Diapers and toys are everywhere. Ooh, but Mom has just nailed the perfect car seat buckle for the toddler. And now the eldest daughter, who looks to be about nine or ten, has secured herself in a booster seat. Dad zips the bag closed and they're off. Ah, but looks like mom doesn't realize her coffee cup is still on the roof of the car, and there it goes. Oh, that's a shame. That mug was a fam favorite. Don't sweat the small stuff. Just nail the big stuff. Like making sure your kids are buckled correctly in the right seat for their age and size.

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Let's talk about, I'm very excited to talk about. Let's talk about Juan Howard. Yes. Mike, first off, when I'm asking white people shit, don't respond, bro. I'm not asking you. I'm asking white people, okay?

First off. But, dog, what was weird to me? I had a friend in high school, and I hope that this will not make sense related to any previous segments on the podcast, I had a black friend in high school who if people called me white would get very angry and would be like, Mike is Italian.

He's not there's a difference. Don't call him white. We don't hang out with white kids. He was mad. He wasn't mad about you. He was mad about him. I don't got no white friends. I got an Italian friend.

What was he talking about? I'm hot. I'm still hot, y'all. I really forgot what we was talking about. DeWine Howard. I brought up DeWan Howard. You mentioned that I responded to it. I should not have responded to it.

I straight up for God, bro. It would have taken me forever to come back to that. Thank God for you, Mike. But anyway, but anyway, what was weird to me was what a homie called it a punch. And, like, I was like, do white people have a word for this? Because maybe he's confined to punch because there's no word in white people's dictionary for mush. Because that was definitely a mush. If it's open phasing, there's a push to end.

It's a mush. There's not enough room for a slap. You know what I mean? It wasn't a punch because it wasn't closed fish. It was just closed fish. If you're handing out suspensions, if you're handing out suspensions, is a mush above or below a slap in terms of seriousness?

I think it's below because a slap that pow, that makes you, that looks and the visuals and the way it sounds is kind of different. A must, see, here's the whole thing. It's like a, a cultural kind of misunderstanding here with this shit. Because if you smack a motherfucker,

you are low-key hoping you catch that motherfucker off guard, right? Your local looking, hoping that you put them at a disadvantage to where some shit pops off. They're like, oh, shit. Because you want to fight. You definitely want to fight if you smacks somebody.

A mush is, I've been so fucking sick of you. I am going to mush your face. And if you swing up me, we can fight. But if not, Either way, you are a bitch, and I don't want to fight you. I just want to let you know I'm sick of your shit, right?

Like, that's what a mush is. You know what I'm saying? Like, you're not trying to fucking put someone at a disadvantage because you're ready to fight when you mush someone. You're just sick of them at that moment. With him, yeah, a mussel that you are really disgusted. That's a get away from me. Get the fuck away from you.

You know what I'm mean? Get the fuck. But I think like a mush, I think a mush is more disrespectful because I'm not scared of you at all. Right. I can literally push you in your face. I don't even want, because a mush, a mush, you don't want to fight. You're just trying to let somebody know what Tom it is. It's not permissible.

It's dismissive. It's dismissive. It's dismissive. A slap is like, a slap is disrespectful because the punch would be like the most respectful. A slap is like, I was whatever you want to make this. Well, you would have. Hey, I'm on whatever right. And I'm on what I'm going to.

Let's take it there, but I'm down. You know what I'm saying? Right, right, right, right. And I think the dude, I think he did it to the, it was because it was assistant coach. It's like, bitch. You shouldn't even be talking to me, bro, bitch. You know what I mean? Who were you?

I'm Juan Howard. Get away from me. He was like the pastor. It's also a fucking hit that nigga with that. He was faith healing him. He was trying to get the goiter out of it. Get the goir. But I think like there's something to

There's there's there's I just got the craziest crap in my hamstrade of all. I'm too old to be wilded out like this. I miss. My body just told me what time to work. My body just mushed me. Jackson's going to mush me for saying.

this, but I do miss nighttime Jenkins and Jones recording, I will say. We used to be wild. It's a little bit of a different, it's a little bit of a different energy when we're recording at one o'clock in the morning Tyler's time. But there's something textbook about what Joanne Howard did though that I think the mush

when people are trying to break it up and you just see the opening and you reach through and go all I can do is push you in the fucking cheekbones and that's what I'm taking what I have. You know what I mean? Because you could, if you punched them, you couldn't got your issue off, but you would have got suspended

further. The mush was the best decision and you see he started with the punch and then opened the hand and just pushed. He really wanted to bank that motherfucker. He caught himself. Tyler said he kind of grabbed it his face too. Right, right, right. After he saw the much was happening, he was just grasping.

Hoping, hoping he got some of that motherfucker's face meat. He did the face-off move. He did the face-off move from face-off. He tried to take his face off. What I love, though, is he got face and a little bit of the top of the head too. Like that made it funnier.

Like this niggas head is bigger. He could palm your shit, bro. Sit your ass down trying to be tough. It ain't worth it. Right. Right. Right. Bro.

Come on, G. That'll make you rethink some things. He saw how he was. He was mad, but he also was more easily being pushed away out of the circle after that too. Well, and then they do it. People have been tweeting all.

One of the players from Wisconsin tweeted, you know, like, I'll go to war with my boys any day. And he ain't throw a single leg. That motherfucker might as well had his hands tie behind his back the whole time. He was clearing niggas out with his head. My fuck. I'll go to war. War. War?

Bro, you didn't even push a knick. You ain't even push a nigga. You were scared. shitless. Are you fucking kidding me? That motherfucker had never been more scared in his life. Getting thrown around in a mosh pit talking about he going to ward.

He wasn't getting bullied in there. He's a teenager. He's a teenage. He might be in his early 20s. Maybe. Let's look up the age. We got to keep him goddamn fucking seventh year dudes. That motherfucker is right, right, right, right.

He came back from his Mormon mission. You know what I mean? He's fucking 36. Well, it's like any time a BYU team comes to Long Beach State and these dudes walk in there with a fucking wife and three kids and you're like, he's trying to feed his family on this volleyball court. This is different. Knocking the air out to fucking volleyball, gee. Bro, he out there scrapping, gee. Fuck you mean.

He likes playing volleyball because it's his alone time. You know what I mean? He gets to lead out to play volleyball. He gets to go to school. Oh, shit. Well, we would clown the fuck out of everyone tonight, man. Shout out to Salt Lake, gee. Um, okay, let's, hold on.

I got to, what I got. Shout out to Utah. I got two more. Oh, yeah, you're going to Salt Lake City for All-Star next year, Bubba. Fuck, bro. I heard they can't even drink out there. We probably still a violent act. You know what I mean?

Criminal act. They pull my dad over in Salt Lake City for smoking a cigarette, bro. Cigarettes? Cigarette. Cigarette. God, damn. Bro. That state is a big-ass footloose movie, bro.

Can you even curse in Utah? He said it's footloose estate. What the fuck? You can't do shit out there, huh? You can't do anything that breaks you joy that you can keep to yourself out there, motherfucker. Hey, Jackson, did you catch that fly? You just grabbed it?

I know this motherfucker. You really thought you was going to catch a fly with your bare hands. This, oh, okay. I'm like, this dick and thing. What's it? How is it a, it's a, you guys have stupid flies at the house? No, they ain't as fast, man.

They do, they do, they're, okay. It's not the ones that, yeah. The ones that look like their ass is too big. Right, right. They live like a day and a half. It ain't the week long ones. It's the ones that live like 36 hours. We're going to fast die young flies.

Bro, bro, look it. You know the week long ones are ready to die? Because they'll do some shit like land on your nose. And look at you. Where you can't ignore them. They're like, please kill me. Please. I'm a fucking fly, nigga.

Please get me out of here. Can you believe this bullshit? Bro, they got me landing on doodle. I'm landing on doodle. I'm either finding out if there's a heaven or I'm finding some poop to eat. Right. Please. Please.

I'm talking about laying on your nose. You fucking cross-eyed staring at the fly. I'm like, you really don't want to be here, do you? You just committed suicide? side. Jesus Christ. If I was a fly, I would too, though. Fuck that.

I wouldn't want that life. All right. I want to talk about the apology that I'm owed for being a skills challenge fucking Stan. Was the skills challenge? Was it not? Was it not? Was it not?

It was a new format. You were a fan of the old format. And you said it's the best part of All-Star Weekend. It said your favorite part. You said it's your favorite part. I said, quote, I actually like the skills challenge. Run the fucking tape. And then you wrote your favorite part.

Your favorite city Cleveland in back. I rolled my eyes because you said that you thought you liked it. And then in the middle of me rolling my eyes, you said it's actually my favorite part. And that's when I said, that's the white as shit you've ever said in your fucking life. You know what I mean? Did the dumb contest not suck ass? Bro, they had a, they had a, I don't know if you saw the stats. The shooting percentage in the dunk contest was lower than the three point

contest. It was like 28% in the fucking, in the, in the dunk contest. We ain't seen one and done after that in my whole motherfucker night. God damn. Jalen Green just upset me, bro. Dunking NFTs. But God damn, what the fuck were you doing out there? I had to say that.

I have to say that. That hair is not ignore that. Let's be honest. Beautiful. I was envied. of that. Of those of that main. Bro, I ain't going to lie to you.

When I see these boys with these two strands and shit, I'd be like, man, I wish I still had the hair line for it. I'd be like, back in my day. But yeah, good head of hair. But Duncan, NFT, just ain't it. But maybe the hair of hair is good enough for you. You know what I mean?

It's a beautiful mate. All right. I'm going to look in the camera. I'm going to, hold on. Let me adjust my ring light. I'm going to look in the camera. camera. Wait, Jackson, is this good? Tell me when it's good. You're so

blown out. I'm just playing. Go ahead. Yeah, what the fuck we're about to do? We see. I'm going to look in the camera. You probably to clean your screen a little bit. Here's our social. This is the social clip for the at the volume sports. It is inexcusable that the dunk contest is

such a steaming pile of shit every year. It's one of the two most exciting things in sports. I have covered 5,000 basketball games in my life. and never in history, from high school to college to the NBA. When someone dunks a basketball, does the whole crowd fail to get excited, except for the NBA dunk contest, which we all sit around and go,

how is this so bad? You have a collection of the greatest physical freaks of nature in the history of our species. This man just punched his desk. In the history of our species. And you cannot get four dudes to go dunk a basketball that's exciting to people. It's totally nuts. I don't understand it.

They have to find a way to fix it or don't do it. Like, have people... Is that point? Is that point where is that bad? Don't do it? Have people sign up to do it and then let the fans vote. Is someone in here exciting enough

for us to actually tune in and watch this? We're passing on the dunk contest this year. No, thank you. But I love Tyler's idea. Let Rudy Gobert stand there and let people power dunk on it like it's a carnival run. Okay, let it be

YouTubers versus NBA or dudes so that there's some kind of pride on the line But it has to be something Better than this To where people aren't watching the actual All-Star game saying Jauman just won the dunk contest The night after it ended

Hey, you saw what happened when they asked me When they said he should do it He said The 10 feet's too low They got to do an 11 feet To get John Moran That's a great answer Such a stunt

To dodging some shit that you know you can't Push it away Right, right. Some shit that will never help you that you know you're going to be playing a fucking uphill battle on. I think the thing is like because the allure is gone, like, you know what I'm saying? As far as like, like, we don't really trip off it as much. I think it died with what, uh, was it Nate? Honestly, you know what I'm saying?

Like, I think it died when he would like, that that shit was weak. I mean, you know, the Levine Gordon won to me. That was the last. I think that's the best one, but I think it was gone at that point. It's been trashed more than good. We only seen two good ones in the last 10 years since May. I mean, keeping it a buck, Vince's 2000 dunk contest,

that was the last time we saw a major star. Depending on how you view Dwight, but, eh, a major star, you know, in the dump contest, you know what I mean?

Yeah. But I'm just saying, in the last 10 years, he's only seen two good ones. You feel, they used to be, like somebody said, we used to buy pizza.

Like, you know what I'm saying? Fucking get sodas, treats. It was a fucking, And, like, if you didn't watch the dunk contest, like, bro, who the fuck? What type of nigger are you when you go to school the next day? You know what I mean?

Be completely honest. If next year, the dunk contest lineup came out and it was Bron, Janus. Not brown, bro. No, but listen, but seriously, you wouldn't, but you wouldn't go nuts. But you wouldn't go nuts. If it was, if it was, if it was, like, four big names, you wouldn't be going fucking ape shit for the dunk contest again? I think if it's, like, a healthy Zion. There's this,

Bliss those, I hate the healthy Zion, maybe Levine jump back in there. Ja. Ja. And Gordon. Like, yeah,

you know what I'm saying? That, that will go crazy. I wouldn't see. I don't, the big guys, Duncan, like,

like, you know, I don't win. But put some names in it. Some names. Some names. Some names. Dwight Howard was the,

I mean, Dwight Howard was the, like, that's the last superstar. Bro, Br. Vince Carter's the last superstar. Nick's out here,

Duncan and Tims. Bro, put some Tim's on. Like, we were supposed to, 2004, dick. Get to fuck out of here, talk. I'm selfish.

I have a kid who's falling in love with basketball. It's an all-star weekend. I want a dunk contest that's fucking exciting that has big names doing cool shit. Their names are more important than the cool shit. I don't know if you're going to get one of those except like every other 10 years after. Because fucking Levine and Gordon felt like a leap in evolution.

You know what I mean? Yeah. And I don't think. wouldn't get that every year. We might get that 10 years from now. You know what I mean? So but that's the thing to me is like that's what I've come to realize. Because we talked about this like a month before the, before the All-Star game, talking about like people dunk up from the free throw line. It's not that big of a deal anymore. That's fair. But a top name dude going against another top name dude. I think that hits the reset button on, oh, wow. Like let's see what

these two dudes that we actually are invested in that have fan bases of their own. Like, let's see what they can do. And bring the competitiveness and the stakes back to it in that way. I'd rather them replace the dunk contest with that rocking jock-ass shit when like, like, you know what I'm saying, Dion Sanders. No, no, no, no, no, no. When Dion Sanders was competing against fucking, you know what I'm saying, you know, like Carter's, you know what I mean?

Like, you know what I'm saying? I think that would, I think that would be better seeing like other athletes compete. Like that one long, like the long jump dude, he was, he was going, that shit was crazy. Like, let's do that because that seemed fun. But all was there is for fun. And it just,

it just hasn't been fun. You know what I mean? You know what Magic said about the difference between, I would say this though. 2020 was fun. 2020 was fun. Wade might have ruined it.

It might be on Wade. Some people said it was on, something said it was on Wade. Aaron Gordon, because Aaron Gordon would never go jumping in again after this. Some people said it's on Braun

because he was like the first superstar that was like, no. I'll be honest with you. I love LeBron James. I put a lot of it. I put a lot of it. I get it. Because he was,

for 10 years, he would have been one of the best dunkers ever. And for whatever reason it was, I mean, I'm not going to put one of the conspiracy theories on his head or whatever. For whatever reason it was, he didn't do it.

He's an in-game dunker, honestly, though. He's an in-game dunker. Like, you know what I'm saying? He's just saying, I mean, I'm not acting like he wasn't staring into the fucking rim.

Let me stop lying. He should have did it. Bro. Come on. Come on. Like, 2009. 2010. That dude was a freak. Bron is masterful at risk analysis

and knowing what battles he should fight. You know what I mean? And he knew that there was nothing to gain from the dunk out. Which is why the Warriors coming out of... But something to lose, though. There's something to gain was for basketball. Yeah. And for the NBA. And it was not for...

And it was not for Braun. And in every other regard, I respect that he's about what's best for Braun will be good for basketball. But in this regard, it's been a major disservice in my opinion. Because John's exactly right. That was the only shit. I didn't watch the fucking,

I didn't care about the All-Star game as a kid. I care about the fucking dunk contest, bro. You know what was actually better than the All-Star game as a kid? The Rookie Soccer Game. The Rookie Soccer Game, because they was really going, this nigga here will never. But, uh, the rookie sophomore game was fun as hell back in the day.

Do you remember, like, the young cast doing, like, they was going way more crazy. Like, they weren't, they were, they were, they were more, like, caught up in the fact that it was All-Star than, like, like, you know, Grant Hill who'd been in it for fucking 100 years straight since his rookie year. You know what I'm saying? I mean, if we want to take it further back, like, the motherfucking mascot dunk contest was the best shit of the 90s. We got Hugo the Hornet versus fucking, first fucking, first the fucking Sun's Gorilla with Willow Bay from Inside Stuff on the call.

That was the best shit of the fucking, you know, All-Star weekend in 94, you know what I'm saying? But I'm being old as fuck here, so don't mind me. I love that. But you're right. I love that. I love that. You know, just bring something back. Just bring the fun back. Something's got to be done to make it fun. All right.

It just ain't that. It's a bad product. It's a bad product. Last thing on the list, because I know you guys are both ready to not be podcasting. I'm going to get higher and just go to sleep. I need, I need Tyler's just straight to the mic rant about the viral video clip of the guy who only only grills steaks with molten lava. This is my fucking look, bro. Look, look.

I'm going to be, I'm going to be completely honest with the island and tell you that, you know, y'all know where I'm coming from because I'm a, y'all know I'm a grill master. I believe that low and slow, indirect heat, smoke is the best way to cook cut of meat, right? But I also, I know, I know that you do believe that. Low and slow. Yeah, we've tasted the low and slow. The periated method. Yes.

Sorry, Jackson. Maybe next year. Yeah, but throw you on the list in 365 days, bro, you just missed it. He owes us a sourdough. He owes everyone a sourdough.

But, you know, I, and so with that said, you can imagine how, how me seeing, you know, some fucking direct heat cooking this shit for forever

on a high temperature, like that was some shit. I was like, no, motherfucker. Like, we are not doing this today. Not.

here, not now. You know what I'm saying? This motherfucker child. Why I'm a Yada? I'm a Yada motherfucker right now. About this. But see, but look, my whole thing here is this. Like, I'm not against the whole cooking meat, you know, on a high temperature.

Because there's some merit to that. Like, I'm someone who loves a fucking, like, a flash fried steak every now and then where you just throw that bitch on a high skillet and, you know, on like three minutes each side and you get that crispy, crunchy car char and shit like I fuck with that every now and then but this shit is like high temperature extended period of time and there is no merit

of cooking meat from that shit that shit is going to be disgusting like they cut that steak open that bitch is like a pork chop bro like there was no juice in that bitch at all that shit was gray as fuck no fucking juice like no you can do it yeah you can flash

jerky did yes you can either do you know slow and low for a long time or or or hot and and high for a very short time and they did hot and high for a long time and that's the worst fucking combination you can do for cooking me so i do not fuck with that guy at all and for one where to fuck that they'd be sure they shouldn't really look like molten lava like you cannot just have lava on hand because you're depending on volcano or ruffness for that that that was like some fucking molten steel shit he was pouring on that shit you feel he's like yeah yeah i was like where's the volcano it nigga like you were seers

Yeah. So that's super. This motherfucker putting fucking a fucking melted down fucking thunderbird engine on your fucking steak. Right. So why are we even doing that to begin with, bro? No, none of that shit was cool, man. Right. All right.

You guess our hot booger boy of the week. Thank you so much to everyone for listening to show. Jackson, thanks for staying up past your bedtime with us. We appreciate it. We was talking shit to Jackson like two hours before we even started recording. I know he's sick of our shit right now, but. You saw I just quoted what he said, timely manners. I just knew.

Let's just highlight this and move on. We got another one. That's good. Jackson's like, please don't do this, John. Sure. What a sweetie. What a sweetie pie. What is the absolute sweetie pie.

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