The Herd with Colin Cowherd - Jenkins and Jonez - Kyrie Irving Trade Reaction

Episode Date: February 6, 2023

The guys discuss all elements of the Kyrie Irving trade, what the Lakers do now, LeBron getting close to breaking the scoring record, John entering his sparkling water era, and more. #Volume #HerdSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Thanks for joining us. Wherever you're listening, as always, Jenkins and Jones, hosted by Tyler, aka Dragonfly Jones. Hey, everybody. Of again. John, aka Legetro Jenkins. Was that, Bubbus. And I'm Mike, aka Gardie B.

And we have got an exciting. Mother fucking Mike. We got to get that all. Mother fucking Mike. Mother fucking Mike. Mother fucking Mike. Moyke. My boy, moik.

My boy, moik. Hands off the Moichichshund dites. Bring that back. Bring that in the Wool's worst back, bro. We need that back, man. For real. All right. We got a real baskety hoops-ass episode of Jenkins and Jones today.

Lots of fucking shootingy hoops news to talk about Big news breaking on Sunday I thought it was going to be a really nice Sunday too Kyrie Irving is a maverick now in the city of Dallas he is not a Los Angeles Laker he is a Dallas Maverick there's a bunch of different angles of this

we'll get to all of them but first off just your reaction to that tweet from Shams John I think you texted that to us within 30 seconds of the tweet going up You beat every other person I know, and they all texted me that shit at some point. He's our shams. How you feeling, Tyler? Um, I feel like it's a letdown for me as a basketball fan.

I am curious to see what what Luca and Kyrie look like together, right? But I feel like, you know, the Mavs, I mean, of course I wanted him to go to the Lakers, right? Like, that had been the big splash. I think that that makes them a championship favorite possibly. I think that, you know, him with Luca, I think that makes the math scary. I don't think it makes him a legit contender. I think they can fuck up a legit contenders postseason and get somebody out here. But, yeah, I mean, I think it's going to be interesting.

Everything with Kyrie is always interesting. But for the on-the-court shit, Luca and Kyrie together, I'm very much looking forward to see what that looks like. I mean, they're going to fuck some people up. They're going to embarrass a lot of people. You know what I'm saying? There's just not, you know, like, you don't have too good enough defenders to not get cooked by one of them.

You know what I'm saying? But yeah, I just, I don't, bro, like, it's, are we, are we talking about Brian's response? Are we going to do that later? I'll bring all of it up for sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. My response to it, I'm just, I'm just unmoved. I didn't get too caught up.

I saw everybody putting Kyrie in a Lakers jersey and shit. I've learned to, like, you know, not count my eggs before they hatch or whatever the fuck. I was not getting caught up in that shit and getting my heartbroken. I'm like, y'all motherfuckers seem real sure about it. But yeah, so I mean, I didn't, I didn't know when it would happen. I definitely think it was a Dallas Mavericks trade. You know what I'm saying?

That was going to happen. But I'm surprised that he, I'm really surprised that, you know, knowing that Kyrie is just, is not afraid to, you know, create a hubbub and start some shit, you know what I'm saying? I'm surprised that, you know, they made the trade knowing he wanted to be in L.A. And I'm wondering if he's going to start some shit. That's what I'm wondering. Like, bro, like, I don't know if this is going to be a smooth move either. So we'll see.

I had pre-separated the art from the artists. So I'm very upset that that process went to waste, you know. The artists and the art are back the same again. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I texted you guys. The art was falling off the bone, you know?

It was. Bro, you were real horn. And I'm not group chat dog. 40, bro. I was like, I'm not getting caught up. I'm not, I will not do this to myself, gee. And all right. I was fully ready if he went to start filling up my head with some bullshit for sure.

But not before he went. You know what I'm saying? I wasn't quite wet yet. You know what I mean? But it was out. You were going to leave the credit card. with the gas station attendant and then just fucking put the nozzle

right in your ear and just to full fill up. Oh my God, bro. Give me all of it. You feel me? To the card is maxed out. Fuck you mean. Tyler, you brought up the fit with the Mavs. I think that's definitely an angle I'm interested in.

You said you felt like a little letdown as a basketball fan, which I agree with. This just is not like, there's so many exciting things that could have happened right and this to me is not one of the exciting things I think you guys both hit on the head like I'm sure we're going to get some great highlights and some wow they both got 35 points after three quarters type shit but I don't really see this being a landscape shifter for the NBA but you guys both seem real confident in the fit which I had concerns about they're both very bald dominant Tyler, you think they just slide in on the court together and it fits pretty quickly? Yeah, I do. I do.

I think, you know, from those seven quarters that we saw when he played with Hardin at the one, you know, Kyrie was cooking at the two. I think that, of course, you're not taking the ball out of Lucas' hands. He's still going to, you know, be the ball dominant one there. I think that Kyrie is going to adjust at the two. But, yeah, you know, like you said, it was a bit of a letdown, bro, because this shit had been cooking since last summer and, you know, no shots to Spencer, didn't whitty.

but like that's how this shit is. You know what I'm saying? A Spencer Dinwiddie during Finney-Smithswap. Not with the bang, but with the Dinwiddie. Yeah. I mean, it's. TSA is shit right there. But yeah.

But yeah. Yeah, I do think that Kyrie of the two can work with Luke Ethan one. I do. As far as fit, the closest, you know, the comparison you would have to Luca, you know, and how his ball nominous is a Hardin. But Hardin changed his game when he went to the Nets. You know what I mean?

like he I mean he he just numbers kind of dropped his assist rose I don't see lucca changing the way he plays for karee so there we we shall see but I think there's a one there's one basketball there's enough for them to you know Tim hardaway junior you're not going to get the the shots up that he once did you know what I'm saying like so I mean I like but I just I don't I don't know if it equates to winning I think they'll get their shots up but I mean I don't see himself changing him way, himself in the same way that Hardin changed himself. So as a team, I don't think they'll be that much better of a squad. You know what I mean? You don't think this, you don't think this trade makes the mad as well? I think it makes them better. Yes, I think it makes some better. But I'm saying,

like, with as far as fit, I don't, I don't see how it makes some, I don't, I don't see them fucking up a really good team. Because I don't, like the way that Hardin changed this game, he was not shooting as much, you know what I mean? And he was, he was, he was, he was, he leaned more into the point card. You know what I'm saying? Than the point, the scoring dominant guard. He wasn't a scoring dominant.

You know, Luca ain't going to do that, and he shouldn't do that. You know what I mean? But that's what allowed Kyrie to have is 50, 40, 90 season, you know, that year with KD,

you know, and Hardin is because Harding stepped back. So why didn't... So the question to me is, you know, I don't know anyone who looked at this and said the Mavis are winning a title this year, which is, you know,

a lot of teams, that's what the Lakers said. We're not doing a show. shit unless it's going to make us front runners. So the question is, why did Dallas do this? Is this literally just Mark Cuban sending a Valentine's note to Luca that says, look, I'm trying to get you help. Stick around.

I mean, is that literally what this is, you guys think? I think there's that. I think that this is by far the best teammate that Luca has had in his business career. I also think that, you know, it's been a lot of Lakers fans who have just been like, oh, we've got to wait until next season, Afri. and I would not think on that. And the reason being is Mark Cuban, he knows how to work the people angle of this shit.

Right? Like, I would not be surprised if Cuban can put some shit in Kyrie's ear to get him to buy in, to get him, you know, to sign to an extension. You know, and he's a man for the next four or five years. I would not be surprised at all about that. Like, you know, he is on the other end of the spectrum in regards to, you know, the people management side of this as Joe Sykes

because that motherfucker has no idea, you know, how to handle that factor of this thing of, you know, this scenario. But, but yeah, I would not be surprised if Cuban can get some buy-in from Kyrie, not only to, you know, be committed to step his shit up to, you know, be consistent to be reliable, but maybe even to get him

to lock in on the max. We'll see. I just don't see him locking in on the mask, bro. I just don't see it happening. He has to buy into the city. You know what I'm saying? Maybe he can get him to buy into the organization a little bit and keep him there. I just don't see it. I just, I just don't see it.

I think you want to go to Legger's for a reason. You know what I mean? It's in L.A. They could potentially win a chip. I don't see him like, you know, hey, I want to sign up for this for this Luca. You know what I'm saying? Right. I'm being a sidekick.

I just don't see it happening. Tyler mentioned the, you know, Joe Si being the exact opposite of Mark Cuban, which, boy, howdy. This whole podcast was going to be, if we'd recorded it a certain time on Sunday, it was just going to be me screaming obscenities at Rob Polenka. And we'll still get to that at some point. But it became very clear through reporting. I think Stein reported it and then other people have kind of confirmed it. Joe Seid said that motherfucker wants to go to the Lakers.

Fuck him. We are not trading him to the Lakers. The Lakers put the picks up. They put the fucking first round picks up, the 27 and the 29. And they say, give us Spencer Dinwiddie and whoever else you got. We're not sending him to the fucking Lakers. Look. Lottery picks.

probably lottery picks. I understand, yeah. Like, right. Like, I understand Josai. I mean, unless Braun is dragging the Lakers to into a top four or five spot in 20- A million years old. Come on, gee. You know, so look, I get Josie hates Kyrie and wants to fuck him over.

I understand that. But what did Lakers fans do to you, Josie? What did I do to you, bro? I mean, come on, man. This is fucking bullshit. I prefer Tom Brady's spiked. move to Josai's spite move. I hate this shit. I was so pissed off when I read

that shit. Do us do your job. Do what's best for your fucking team, bro. Do what's best for your team. You can lose your family. That's okay. But do what's best for the team. Hell no. I mean, it all goes back to last summer where we knew that Josai was grandstanding

to let us know that Kyrie doesn't run shit around there. And in his final moment, in his send off with him, he wanted to remind us that too. So But he's so stupid. He's so big partner shit, man. Because he's saying like, Kyrie doesn't run shit.

Bro, you fucked yourself over to fuck him up. You look stupid, bro. And it almost makes me understand why Kyrie didn't want to fuck with your ass. Because in them damn, when you were trying to come up to come with a deal, you probably had some weird shit going on. Get the fuck out of here. Bro, that's an insane thing.

That's an insane thing to put on the table. When's the last time you said, well, I get it, Kari. What's the last time you said that did? Garry was right, nigga. We was the weirdos. That nigga is crazy, though. You know what I mean?

And he didn't want to fuck. Like, okay, this nigga. And I think that was the final start. Like, this nigga really crazy, bro. He's the pettiest fucking billionaire on the fucking planet. How do he get his money? I really wonder, because you can't get your money making decisions like he just made. And you know what I'm saying?

And running a company how he's been running it. Alibaba? Yeah, China's Amazon. He's the Chinese Jeff. Basically. Fuck, niggas get lucky ever so often. He got lucky and got him a billionaire.

Bitch ass, nigga. Shit. Golly. Not my, not my favorite person at the moment. It's just, it's just so,

it's so petty and like, bro, you're running a company. Because of Kar, now you're the point where it's just blow it up. It's over. This trade ended

whatever the fuck you was trying to do for the last, officially. Officially. Kady ain't staying? The fuck! You got rid of Karee to bring Spencer Dinwiddie back.

You had Spencer Dinwiddie. You had Spencer Dinwiddie at home, bro. To spike Karii, you run, right, right. And you went out and off the fuck. Despite Kari, you also, you know what I'm saying? Like, you know, like fucked up your shit with Katie. Come on, bro. Like, dog, now you back to the, it might be a fun team to watch how they,

how they were when they had you don't even got Jared Allen no more it's not even going to be fun how it was in those days you know what I'm saying it's just going to be feeling kind of bad for KD honestly you know what I mean Katie is bro Katie if he he dropping his nuts for real bro I don't think that's going to go in back at this point dog come on you know what I mean Jackson says isn't this trade more likely to keep KD than the Lakers No, I don't think so.

I doubt it. I don't think so. This is a, bro, you're blowing this shit up. That's what, that's what you, you, and you, and you, do you, if you're KD at what, 33, 32, 33, and you're like, you have, you probably have, you know, how many years you have playing at this level, who, who's to say? But if I'm his age, I'm like, I'm not signed, I'm not trusting this fuck, man. Well, yeah, there's a couple other components to that, Jackson. of which being that this also completely ends KD's ability to or willingness to attempt to recruit anyone else to the Nets. If they're owned by a team that is going to, I mean, it's now been reported

publicly that he directly said, fuck you to Kyrie. We are not taking the best deal on the table because I want you to be pissed off about this shit. You know, so to me, that is a, and we've seen KD kind of tie himself to Kyrie in that way in this process. I wouldn't be surprised if KD is out here on Twitter.com at some point this week. You know, making some statements. Get me out. Let me out. He's too sad right now, though.

He's too sad right now, though. Bro, he had to put the phone down. He's not sadder than LeBron James, who absolutely broke my fucking heart on Sunday with the tweet. Maybe it's me. You know, Robert, Todd, Polinkis, Junior, Jeannie Bus. You're the fucking Lakers.

You have this man tweeting out here like he plays for one of the regular teams. You're the fucking Lakers. He's not supposed to be doing that. He's supposed to be laughing at everybody else right now, like lighting fucking cigars with trillion dollar bills that don't even exist as shit. And he's tweeting on Sunday afternoon a couple days before he becomes the NBA's all-time leading score. While he's doing shit at 38,

no one's ever done in history. Maybe it's me. Come on, man. What stage of grief is this? Is this acceptance or depression? I'm trying to figure that out. Maybe it's me is bargaining. Okay, that's bargaining.

So he's only a stage, what, three? That's stage two, three? This had to hurt you guys, though, to see him publicly express feeling hurt. Hurt, not just frustrated. We've seen him publicly express being frustrated. This is publicly expressing being hurt by the way that the end of his career is being managed.

Yeah. I mean, shit hasn't gone on Bronswayfall since since motherfucking July 4th, 2016, basically, when KD went to the Warriors, right? Like, I mean, you kind of get used to the shit now, so. Pray is up for the home, man. You'll get through this, bro. Right. He needs somebody to give him a good pal on the back, you know what me?

Lift the spirits, dog. I didn't necessarily feel hurt. Like, I mean, it's just, it's just, to me, I'm like, wow, like this is the, we have, like you said, a player that is at his level, you know what I mean, like doing what he's doing at this age, something we've never seen before. And we're seeing him be as human as possible. Bro, this is great cinema. This is incredible cinema. Whatever, whoever wrote this motherfucking script, bro. Nigger, they earn and they keep behind this motherfucker.

earned every dollar in all the attention. I'm giving this shit. Because that was like, bro, LeBron James, maybe it's me. That is the most relatable thing that Brian's ever done. That or his kids not giving a fuck that he's LeBron James.

The two things, you know what I'm saying? Like, bro, we've all been there. Maybe it's me. You know what I mean? I don't think it's him in this case. But Jesus Christ. Mike, how you feel it, man? You look hurt over there, dog.

I'm honestly, I'm so angry. I can't even tell you. But the Lakers did what they were supposed to do. Correct. You were just dealing with a motherfucker who had his, dude, a billionaire that had his heart set on fucking ruining whatever plans Kyrie had going on.

He wasn't reasonable at that point. Right. Joe Sy had me giving biblical lessons to Vincent earlier today about spite. You know, It's like you cut your nose off, you know, to spite your face. Yeah, it's just like, you're heard about the Sphinx, young, you're right. It is a little easier to take knowing that the Lakers did what they were supposed to do and maybe signals that they're still have something coming before the trade deadline. But, no, it's just a sliding door moment.

John, you said, you know, you don't put your, you don't want to put yourself out there and be hurt. Like, I'm a Lakers fan. And I irrationally believe that we're going to get everybody. And then most of the time it's true. At least a good percentage of the time is true. It hasn't been true in the last couple years, though. But I believed it about Braun. And that was one of my favorite days ever on social media.

Yeah, yeah. It was mine too, bro. You know, oh, it was great. LA was, you know, I mean, it was, we were ready to go. But, yeah, I just. Bron believed it too, though. I think Bronn believed it too. He was in his room, jerking his dick to,

fucking to these memes. You know what I'm saying? And, you know, he was let down. He was heartbroken. Dick in his hand alone. Maybe it's me. Maybe it's me.

Maybe it's me. Yeah, so I don't know. So what do you guys think the Lakers do now? Is there another move out there? I mean, obviously we're seeing, you know, as we get closer to the deadline, more teams sort of pop that yard sale sign out. the front yard.

You know, part of the reporting that Stein had is that the sons were willing to move Chris Paul, among others to the nets. I mean, so that for sales start, I'm not talking about Chris Paul to the Lakers. I'm just saying that's not a name I had seen out there as the sons are trying to ship Chris Paul out. So the market will get a little bigger and they do still have assets. And I think they have now sent the message. If you give us something that we think gets us to a championship, we will put those

picks on the table. So do you think there's another move coming? or is Braun just going to be sitting here? Maybe it's meing for the fucking rest of his 20th season in the league. Get real thirsty and go after KD, dog. Get real, real, real thirsty. If you really want to stick it to Kyrie, that's the thing to, Josiah. Right.

We're back. Tyler, you should be doing, if you really want to stick it to Kyrie, Josai, I got something for you. You know what I mean? Jackson, this is a social clip. You don't really want Katie. I know the one thing that Kyrie would hate to see the most would be Kevin Duran and that purple and gold, baby. You feel me? You feel me?

You know, you know, all that Cary's camp told me that he would be apoplectic if the Lakers were ever to acquire Kevin Durant. Sheesh. That's what he need to do. That's what it's time for, man. Katie to the Lakers. Fuck it. Go all the way, Patty. Fuck it.

Right, right. If I'm going to go crazy, I'm going to get crazy, bro. I'll go crazy. crazy for that. I'll join y'all with that shit, bro. All right. I feel better now. Thanks, guys. I appreciate it. We do have the news. We do have approaching this week. Lakers play on Tuesday and on Thursday. Braun is closing in on that scoring record. It is just, NBA is such a soap opera. It was already exciting that he's closing in on this record. You throw all this Kyrie trade deadline. Like he's literally going to break this record at home against the

bucks on the day of the trade deadline on Thursday a week before he and Janice are picking their all-star teams on live television against each other, right? You know what I mean? You talk about scripted. That's fucking crazy. But what do you think this week is going to be like, Tyler, are you tapped in for those record games, like, you know, on the countdown? Are you just ready for the shit to be over? Like, you know, where are you at right now? No, no, I'm for sure tapped in. Like, you know, like I told you the only thing I'm really going to hate is the fucking discourse and I'm probably going to try to tune out of that. But I'm definitely going to enjoy the actual moment.

You know what I'm saying? So looking forward to that. We need something this season. God damn. The fuck. That is the only thing that I've got myself excited for. I haven't lied to myself. I've been really good about lying to myself the last two years.

I had like a, it was like the last playoff, like playoff before last. I think I had like, and I've been good, good since. So that's the only thing I got myself excited for. I'm definitely tapping in it for that first. Sure's key. They need to put that like when you like sign up for therapy. They need to put that like, this will ruin your ability to be a sports fan. Like I honestly think too, working in sports has allowed me to be more reasonable because it showed me myself.

You know what I mean? I'm dealing with me's. I was for a year for a while. I was dealing with a lot of meats. And I'm like, wow. I was out here, you know, crazy. in this way. I wasn't as disrespectful as shit. You know what I'm saying?

But like I had some wild, you know, some wild shit going on. But yeah, man. So, yeah, not lying to myself no more, bro. I'm not signing up for that depression. Did y'all see the athletic story about John Morant? Yeah.

John, did you see it? Yeah, I saw it. I read it. Okay. It's time for more Republican roundball on chickens and Jones. That's how y'all feel? I feel very old when I read that. I was like, bro, get away from those knuckleheads.

Like, you know what I'm saying? So the story for the people who didn't see it was that, you know, there had been some kind of an altercation between some of Jaws people. And I think they said Pacers personnel. So I don't, you know, we don't know who it is with the Pacers. They got the Wolf and Whip players and shit. I think they were waiting on James Johnson or some shit. Okay. But allegedly, according to.

said Pacea, but what didn't seem reasonable to me was that the, that it would be players who said they didn't want to have the, you know, they don't want to talk about it because they were fearful for their safety or whatever. But whoever they interviewed said that, um, an SUV, which members of the Pacer security personnel believed had John Morant in it, um, was going by the Pacer's team bus and that a red laser, uh, was pointing on to different members of the Pacers, uh, team and, uh, personnel. Um, and that, you know, the belief in the Pacers security team was that that laser was attached to a gun. So that's a backstory for people who haven't read the story. Obviously, these Grammys, all kinds of other shit going on on Sunday night.

That might be one of those things that ends up only traveling in basketball circles. We'll see what Monday looks like. We'll see what the rest of the day looks like newswise. So, Tyler, you say your reaction to that was trim the fat on the fucking on the traveling group, basically. Yeah, bro. I felt like a grandpa. I just was like, Jaws,

stop hanging with these knuckleheads, bro. Like, you got so much going for you. Don't fuck this up by running with the wrong crowd, dude. Like, that simple.

If it's true, for sure. But the NBA did an investigation already. None of it was corroborated and they still dropped the story. And that's what's weird to me. You know what I mean?

Like, the NBA already did the investigation, said there was none of the gun shit. There was an argument. And I think that happens. That's not what made it abnormal. So you think he was right. in the SUV with some goons who had a laser pointer

that were just like fucking with the basers. No, no, I just don't. I mean, the gun shit just, like, like, if they can't, if they, if none of the gun shit could be, I mean, there's cameras every fucking wear, bro. If there's a camera in Jama ranch fucking truck, you know what I'm saying, it's, it's, you know, I mean, you can't hide from shit in this fucking, you know what I'm saying, this fucking Orwellian fucking existence we have, you know what I mean? So like, dog, I just, I just, I, I don't know if it's how.

true that part is if nothing none of the gun shit that is the reporting was corroborated by the NBA you know what I mean I don't think the NBA would necessarily be like publicly confirming a story like that about a bright young star though you know I don't know um yeah I kind of have the same reaction to you Tyler it's just like whether it I mean honestly even if it's not true even if it's just that this is how the NBA feels that you know they're moving or whatever. He definitely needs to be careful because it's not just a what could it cost you in terms of, you know, money and whatever else, man, but it's too, it's too much playing with guns

and goofy shit. It ain't safe. It ain't safe out here, bro. Yeah, like nothing, nothing about the world the last couple years should suggest to someone that it's, uh, I don't know, part of a game or whatever to be doing that kind of shit. So I, I hope that that's a, honestly, I hope the story coming out is a wake up call of some kind or something. I love John of death, bro. I mean, I just, I would hate to see anything happened to his career or to, you know, him as a person. So hopefully, I don't know. I was,

you think that man was really riding around? I mean, that's just insanity to me. That's just so insane for this man riding around with a gun with a, with like a call of duty gun. You know what I'm saying? And pointing it at, like, that's like, like, the same. shit cool. I pointed it at a motherfucker bro, that's like, that is just absolute stupidity. I don't see T. Moran, you know what I'm saying? Fucking with that type. I see him like

telejotic leave that motherfucker alone too. You know what I mean? I don't think he's going to let that let somebody like that be around the son as well. I would say this and I think you know, the pro athletes who come out of Long Beach, most of them don't come out of the suburban parts of Long Beach, right? For sure. I can see clear as day

a true version of what you're both saying. 100%. I can 100% see what John is saying. And I can 100% because I have known dudes who similarly, you'd be like, oh, you got everything going for you, like who just had the wrong people around him like Tyler's talking about. And it's like there are people he's been friends with this whole life. It's people who he believes are looking out for him.

You know what I mean? And so I just hope for the best. Obviously, we sort of only know the tip of the. iceberg, I'm sure, on this story. But I would say stories like that don't come out about bright young stars lightly. You know what I mean? So I'm just, I don't know. Hopefully it's a wake-up call to somebody.

It was a laser pointer. He was like, pass me the laser pointer. Pass me the laser pointer. I'm going to play with some cats right now. Right, right. Crazy, crazy. Have you, what's the last time you saw a laser pointer? Do they still sell those at Spencer's and shit?

We have one for the kids to play with the cat. Oh, okay, okay. Actually, someone just got arrested in Long Beach, I think by like the FBI because they had like an industrial laser pointer and they were flashing it at airplanes, at pilots as they were taking planes off at the airport here. Oh, wow, wow, wow. That's crazy. Yeah, I haven't seen a laser pointer like since I started having sex. You know what I mean? I thought like I lost my virginity and then laser pointers just are invisible to me now.

Like, that is the nerdyest shit on the planet If they just pass me the laser pointer That's the lamest shit ever I would be more embarrassed by the laser pointer I'll be like, nigga, just, yo, it was a gun, nigga, it wasn't I wouldn't want people to know that I was attached to a laser pointer You know what I'm saying? No, we had that call of duty shit, man, arrest me, nigga, fuck that.

The Jose fucking with a nigger with a laser pointer. I'll tell you that shit. All right. Before you have sex, there's laser pointers. Then there's a period where you're having sex. And then after you're done having sex, there's a period in which men are drinking sparkling water. John is entering that phase of his life.

I do want to talk about this briefly. How long have you been here, Mike? How long have you been here? What's that? The sparkling, you've been in the sparkling water phase already? Oh, no, I don't drink sparkling water. Okay, I thought you were saying it because you, because it's, okay, okay. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I'm just, I'm interested. I actually don't really like carbonation generally. So I, yeah, yeah, uh, I sees because I'm fucking nine years old. So explain the, explain it, but I'm not, but here's what I would say. I feel like everyone I know who likes sparkling water has liked it for like their entire life. You came on the pod today and we're like, I just tried sparkling water. Last week. This week.

No, last week. How did this happen? And what is the role of sparkling water is going to have in your life from now on, bro? I'd already eat lunch and rather wanted to go to lunch. So I said I'd pull up. And I was like, I'm not going to eat lunch, but let me eat my dessert for the week.

You feel me? So I'm going to eat this motherfucking chocolate cake. You feel me? The shit was delicious. I actually got it from a different restaurant and then came and ate it at her where she was at. You feel me? But anyway, I'm like, I want something to drink to wash this down,

but I'm not a milk drinking ass nigga. I love water. but water ain't going to really do it. Water and chocolate cake is a odd combo. Yeah. Bro, like, yeah, yeah. So I'm like, yo, maybe something

with a little bite. So you have sparkling water? I just thought that shit, you feel me? And I drank it, I'm like, wow, this has a little, I'm like, this ain't bad. This is not bad.

I've always been anti-sparkling water. Like, I'm a nigga that will mock you. Like we said, and they ask you sparkling, you know, sparkling or, give me, give me the, sparkling, nigga, come on. What the fuck I look like?

You disrespected me, asking me this shit. You know what I'm saying? Like I look like a sparkling water-ass nigga to you? You know what I mean? You calling me a fuck nigga? Bro, I challenge you to a duel.

But anyway. But no, man, like, dog, I just didn't. I tried it and I fucked with it. So today I'm like, let me try it again. Had it again. Somebody said I was weak because I was drinking, what was it? Pellegrino or whatever the fuck it was.

And so I got the little Mountain Valley shit. And that apparently is good. I fucked with it. I've been fucking with it, bro. It's been solid. All right. I mean, what? Is this what?

No, I'm just, like I said, I'm just curious. Tyler, are you anti-Sparkling Water? Am I bitch-ass nigga now, dog? Am I kicked off the pot? Oh, you like it? Oh, wow. How long have you liked it? I'm not a sparkling water connoisseur.

I'll copy it every now and then. You know, like I'm saying, when we were kids, like that motherfucking Canadian Miss, dog, that shit was delicious. And that was flavor sparkling water, man. I thought sparkling water and soda water were the same thing. Maybe that's why I was just so, you know what I mean? And then I would, for a while I thought it was that. And then I would like, you know, people would order sparkling water.

I'd taste them. I'm like, what the fuck is this? You know what I mean? And then what is that, what is that sparkling water shit that people be drinking? Like the LaCroix shit? De LaCroix, that shit nasty. That shit tastes like TV static. Bro, it tastes like peeve.

You know what I mean? Like, I'm like, nigger, y'all drinking, y'all pain. to drink pee, nigga, you know what I'm saying? Like, they'll make no damn sense. I told Mero, there was a point like two years ago at some point during the pandemic or right before it when all white people in America got a shipment from Amazon that had LaCroix and Hokas. And just one day, LaCroix and Hokas were on every single white person that I see every day. And I'd never heard of either company before ever.

And all of a sudden, they were everywhere. There was no ramp up to the products. You know what I mean? it just was like send all to white America fucking everyone open their boxes up together what the hell are hokas it's a it's a beefy ass running shoe bro and I was telling my homie but Tyler it's like have you worn ultra boost you know it's like the extra foam and ultra boost it's like twice as much fucking foam

it doesn't look like an ultra boost it's wide and it's fat as fuck bro it is it is basically somebody taking a dad's shoe like the monarch and making it look like it's made for actual running. Like monarchs don't look like they're made for running. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Right. But it's-

They look like they're made for standing there. Right, right. They look like it's made for daddy. You know what I mean? Monarch is just made for doing dad stuff. Right. But like, Hoccas are like the actual fitness version of that, it seems like. Are they comfortable?

Yeah, I mean, apparently they are. I ain't going to lie to you. I've reached the point where I will wear some weak-ass comfortable shoes when I like doing errands and shit. No, I have a lot of friends. I have a lot of friends and I have black friends who wear hokas

specifically because and I'll stay to the ultra booth Adrian is, Adrian is swears by them. Yeah. I told you we have my friends. Andrew be doing that shit on with him

or he just bum around with him or one, nigger. No, he just, he's just, this is weird. He's purely running. Adrian ain't putting

on this fancy ass shit, bro, and then fucking with the hokas, nag. No, but, but, but,

but, yeah, like he swears by them like, Tyler. You'll see exactly what John's, H-O-K-A. Yeah, yeah.

And I just, bro, I'm not at the face. I'm not that far to the point where I'm like, I'm going to put these hokas on and go, I can't even wear them to the gym, bro. I think Nikes aren't uncomfortable enough. That's why I like Ultra Boost are the perfect middle ground. They're comfortable with my doctor who I went to see from my feet hurting told me that they were cushioned enough.

You know what I mean? But the hokas are what they'll tell you. Like if your feet are fucked up, every doctor is like, go spend the extra money and get hokas and fucking walk around on clouds. They make you, they practically lifts. There's so much fucking foam in the shit. I was, I was, bro, yeah, you're at least, I'm at least six foot and a half inch.

Right. With some focus on, bro. And you know what I'm saying? Like 200, 250 your pop. Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah, they, yeah. Shit's probably, bro.

I'm, I'm curious. As far. Nigger, I don't, I'm, I'm, I'm, the reason I won't put them on. Locking around on tractor tires. Remember, well, when we were in a podcast, I brought up like, we were joking about prostate and shit, right? Like, you know what I'm saying? I'm like, Nick, we've officially, oh, we hear cracking jokes about prostate,

nigga, I didn't even know what one was to about 33, nigga. You know what I'm saying? But, like, dog, like, I think Hokas are them, like, you put, I'm going to put them on, and I'm like, you'll be on the podcast. I'm wearing George tuck it in my t-shirt. It's about comfort to me. Right. George T-shirts, I'm, it's going to, they're going to ruin me.

That's why I never put on crocs, bro, when you were trying to get us to wear crocks. I was like, everyone I know said they used to make fun of crocs. and they started wearing them and now they wear them all the time. And I didn't want to be the person who wears crocs all the time. So crocs, crocs got me to Birx. And Burks, for whatever reason, right now are cool. But I think I'm staying past.

They're not past the time when they're cool. Burks, bro, they got me. They're too comfortable, bro. I'm here forever, nigger. You feel me? You know what I mean? But yeah, hocus, bro. I just, that's a step too far from EG.

You did pass on some wisdom in the group chat. You mentioned that, that you're not old until you have heard of a prostate. Right? Nigger, you're not old to you heard of a prostate. You can be 40s and 20s. It's like a rumor. You maybe it's like, what's that mean?

Right, right. That's interesting. I never, you know what I'm saying? And then when you, like, when you actually hear somebody say the word out loud, that's when you're officially old. Because you don't hear, I never heard it in my 20s. I never heard of my 20s. Jackson is not hearing any of this part of the podcast.

I think, bro, bro, bro, just like, what I say wasn't, just like laser pointers are invisible after you start having sex, like, I can't see them anymore. Like, bro, you can't read prostate. He probably isn't hearing us right now. He doesn't even hear the word. You know what I'm saying? You can't read it. It's nowhere to be found until you're 34, 35, digger.

You know what I'm saying? Not a joke. I was pretty tuned into the Hoka conversation and I did sort of zone out there for a second. Bro, I'm telling you. Your body naturally is like, no, uh-uh. This year, the only app you need at your Super Bowl party is Fandul, America's number one sportsbook.

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call 1-800 gambler or visit fendool.com slash RG. All right, Jackson, wake up. I need your assistance. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. Okay. Do you have that? that clip I asked you to play? Yeah, I do. Okay, hold on. So I shouldn't have sent this to, I should not have sent this to you guys.

I should have just had Jackson queue it up. So John has seen this. Okay, Tyler hasn't watched it. This is, I think, maybe the funniest thing that's ever happened. Jackson, okay. I've been having a lot of sexual escapades, you know, like having a little adventures with some freaky Chicago girls. And I've come to the realization.

I've been talking to one that I don't think pegging is necessarily that gay. How quiet it is. Why was it so quiet at a comedy show? It sounded like space, nigga. He was telling jokes on the moon, motherfucker. He fell off the stage and nothing happened. All you heard was his fucking mic, nigga. We didn't even get any ooze of concern.

Like, I need to see the whole routine. They might have been sick of that motherfucker. He might have been bombing the whole time. bro. They might have been like, oh, thank God. This motherfucker's gone. And the thing is, though, he was the bit he was, bro, you are not getting pussy. I see you, nigger. You were lying and the universe kicked you in your ass for lying on your dick, nigger. We're going to throw you off the stage because it's not like, bro, Nick, come on, man. How did you fall off that fucking stage?

You know what I mean? It's not like it's small. You know what I mean? He's at the laugh factory. There was no laugh to be found. There was, there wasn't even sound, nigger. There wasn't even sound at the factory. He fell off the stage and you see a man in the front row right next to him.

Not even a breath. It was so quiet. I would not say, I legit need to see that whole set. I need to know what degree of terrible was he that he detached all viewers of any type, any type of human emotion, any type of concern, any type of joy in his downfall. There was nothing there, dog. Completely indifferent.

He had to be horrible. Freaky stories with his freaking Chicago girls. You know what? I've been having some little adventures. I've been right. That was some freaky Chicago girls. Sure. dog.

Peggit isn't that. G. Bidda, but a bit of a... All right. I don't have a larger point there. We don't do Booker Boy of the Week anymore, but that's the Booker Boy of the Week.

Oh, man. Congrats to you for doing the funniest thing ever and not getting a laugh. Bro. Sheesh. You fell off the stage while telling a terrible joke. How do you get on that stage? They do like borderline They do like borderline

Like we have a laugh factory in Long Beach They have like borderline Open mic nights and shit like that there I don't think you could just walk up to it But it's you know what I mean It's people like I could get on stage You know what I mean And I've never done stand up comedy

And I'm really Yeah yeah but there's like nights Where it's like you could like sign up for it It's not quite open mic You don't think you'd be terrible Dude I'd be fucking horrible No that's what I would be terrible Okay God

I'm good at speaking in public and stuff, but I would be bad at people who think that they'd be good at stand-up comedy are psychopaths. Bro, what's wildest, I've had friends that got up on stage who'd like try to like, you know, and I'm like, bro, and it's usually not the funniest people I know either, you know what I mean? And it's like, nicket, how? You, you're, that seems torturous. You know what I mean?

That seems masochistic. Do you like yourself? You want to get up there and try to make people like. that are expecting for you to make them laugh with the written material written material nigger that just seems impossible it's like an impossible feat

yeah all right speaking of impossible to enjoy something did you see the trailer for the new white man can't jump with Jack Harlow in it how are we becoming worse in making movies as we get more technologically advanced

everything is better But movies, it seems like, like remakes are horror. Like the dice, dog, there's nothing this. Did you just fart, Mike? No, no, no. This is a chair. But, that was great. Bro, bro.

Bro, the chair was making so much noise that it actually picked up in the mic. That is, But dog, it's like, I just, I mean, there's been, I just don't understand how this remake could be this bad. You know what I mean? It's just, it's such a phenomenal movie, like classic to get to this point. Like, you know, I saw the House Party remake and I was like, okay, that's not for me. That's for the Youngings. House Party, the original House Party was geared for teenagers and, you know, high school kids too.

Maybe this is, this isn't for me, you know, because you know, that shit. not look appealing to me at all because I felt like the appeal of the original house party was this is everyday shit that happens in your neighborhood right and they had like fucking you're at LeBron's house with all these Alishes and I was like the bro that the spirit of the original house party isn't even in this shit

and for the white man can't jump I feel like that shit too like like bro it's not the same spirit like the magic of white man can't jump is that fucking Wesley and Ann fucking Woody they were such big personalities bro they were so fucking over the top

They nailed that shit. And then you're trying to bring in this little quirky white guy with his little subtle humor. And it's not working, dog. It's not working. And if I sound like a Jack Harlow hater, yeah, I am. Okay. I wish him all the best. He seems like a good kid, but I do not like his music.

And I do not like him getting the fucking keys to a classic like this. It's embarrassing, bro. It's just embarrassing. It's embarrassing. If I sound like a Jack Harlow hater. Correct. What else you got for you. You're right.

Yeah, but you said it like I just, I didn't like the sense of humor, just the like, oh, he's like him. Like, it's just not. And also, we've seen Jack Carlo Hoop. Like, at least the movie, I don't know how good old, what's that, what's the white boy's name? Woody Harrowson. Woody Harrison.

Woody Harrison. He looked like he could actually hoop in real life. You know what I'm saying? I think he was a college athlete basketball. Bro, we've seen Jack Harlow Hoop and he's fucking horrible, okay? So like this is just, I mean like, like, nigger, like, bro, if he shot a hundred shots, he might make seven of them.

You know what I mean? Like, in an empty gym. Nigra, what the fuck? This ain't for him. You just put a white boy in the place of Woody Errolson. You know what I'm saying? Like, nigga, it's just ain't it, dog. But it's kind of like what Tyler said about House Party,

dude, you can just feel the, like, you can feel the strategy meeting, like, in the trailer. You know what I mean? And, like, for these movies that just sprung up out of a sense of, like, fun and experimentationist of stuff, it just sucks to see them slapped back up there like this. I don't know. It, I'll be honest with you, it bummed me out. Right, right. As a Hulu special.

If it's a Hulu special, don't even make it. Don't make a fucking sequel to a classic like that to be, you know, it's not even moving. movie worthy. You know what I'm saying? It's a fake movie. It's on Hulu. The fuck. And we just did, we did not need Jack Harlow.

I hope this is like the sonic. Who's watching movies on Hulu too? The last movie I watched on Hulu was the, um, the, uh, Predator's sequel. The one about the, the, yeah, I heard that was great. That was like a year ago, I think. I've only watched, only watched TV for Hulu. Like, you know what I'm saying? I don't even think about, get going on.

Hulu for movies. Maybe I'm tripping, but just, uh, yeah. I don't know. Rema cast has been good. Like, that's the thing like, how do you get, we get to this point and we're remake a shit of this always, but are the kids fucking with the new house party? I haven't heard any of that. I haven't heard any of that. I haven't heard

anything. I've not heard any teenagers talking about, we're going to go see a house party. Kids don't really go to the movies like that anymore either, bro. That might be true as well. And you would know more than I would know about that. But like, you know what I'm saying? As far as like, bro, our parents at least knew how big of a deal house party was, right? Right.

You know what I'm saying? And, you know, you know, our, you know, they at least understood that. This don't, who are these niggas? I just remember thinking, like, big deal back in the day, bro. You know what I'm saying? And I'm not trying to disparage them. I'm glad they got their bag and shit. You know what I'm saying? Get them

niggas more money. Hope they get more jobs out here. You feel me? But like, bro, like, I just, it's, it ain't. I just, I just, I remember being a kid and the fact that like, anytime we'd go to the Woolworths, they'd be playing like music that my mom grew up listening to, right? They'd be playing oldies. And I remember thinking, wow, it's going to be so cool when I'm older and like everything

about culture is a shit that I like, like that I grew up with. And we're here now and it fucking sucks. Make some shit for the fucking kids or like bring the oldies back. I don't get like, but you know, put gasms on Hulu instead or like whatever. Gas, Wisconsin. And that's the problem. bro. It's not just bad. Like, like, it's

like, I'm not, we made, there was a bunch of bad movies in the 80s, bro. You know what I mean? Right, right, right, right. A ton of them. You know what I mean? But like, if you're going to remake a classic like that, make it a good bad movie, where at least it's fun. You know what I'm saying? It doesn't seem like it's even that. Like you said, Mike, you can hear the strategy meeting.

I can hear the white women saying, say, Hey, the kids. We should get, um, uh, we should get, um, uh, we should Get a Jack Harlow to be in this movie. You know? You know what I'm saying? Hey, this and this and this makes it. You know what I'm saying?

You hear like all these things that they put together to try to build the puzzle that is this. And it just isn't it, bro. You know what I mean? It's like it's just out of stone. I hope it's like the Sonic the Hedgehog thing. Leave the classic alone, bro. Where they release the trailer and, you know, it has Sonic with the teeth in it and everyone was so horrified by it that they like bullied them into making a better movie.

Yeah. So just like, yeah. Let's bully him into editing Jack Harlow out of the movie. White man can't jump with no white guy in it. Honestly, if you want a white rapper who can give you some over the top, Woody Harrison White Man Can't Jump shit, riffraff was right there, bro. If riff rap was in that shit, I'd be like, hold on, I might want to feed this.

Because that motherfucker is a character, dog. Riff is 100 years old, though. Riff is like older than us, I think. But also the snappy, but also the snappy marketing guy is not pulling riffraff. You know what I mean? He's pulling, who is that with the Little Nazex, Jack Harlow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I used to like Jack a little bit before he blew up.

He had some, when he blew up like this, when shit got. He left off. He got him lost himself. All right. That's all the time we got for Jenkins and Jones. We'll be back on Thursday. Live on Amazon Amp, as always 7 a.m. West Coast, 10 a.m. East Coast.

And we'll be everywhere else right after that. Actually, hold on, scratch that. We might be at a different time on Thursday. because of the trade deadline. We're going to figure that out later. So we'll mention on Twitter when it's going to be, and we'll see y'all then. Bye.

Bye.