The Herd with Colin Cowherd - Jenkins and Jonez - Serena, the GOAT

Episode Date: September 2, 2022

The guys talk about Serena's last US Open and how she is showing why she is the best at her sport, Jay-Z going off in a Twitter Spaces, and a breakdown of the latest "House of Dragons". #HerdSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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or text next step to 533442 or call 1-800 gambler. Welcome to Jenkinson Jones on the Volcker. Volume Podcast Network. It is Friday, September 2nd. And we have got an absolute cavalcade of nonsense and bullshit. Is it dropping today? Is it dropping today? It might be dropping a day later today.

It's dropping tomorrow. It is. That's what I said? Oh, okay. My bad. Sorry. I thought we were dropping today. Leave all this in.

Get with the fucking programs. Sorry, guys. Sorry. What the fuck. Yo, are we dropping a day? Change the date, Mike. Who gives a fuck anyway? Wow.

My bad. Someone didn't read the shit he was C-Ced on. Shaw did. Fuck an email. Text the nigger. Go ahead. As always, Jenkins & Jones is hosted by my good,

if not super attentive, close friends, Legetro Jenkins, aka John. Wasam Bubba's. And always completely on top of everything, Dragonfly Jones, aka Tyler. Hey, everybody.

How's again? I'm Garty B. a.k.a. Mike. And hey, before we get to the rest of the pod, got some stuff to talk about as you gear up for fall, you need the right people on your team to help your small business fire on all cylinders. LinkedIn Jobs is here to make it easier to find the people you want to talk to faster and for free. This is Tyler's world. Tyler is the hiring expert. And I know he has lots of positive things to say about LinkedIn jobs.

Yes, I'm a recruiter as many of you will know. And LinkedIn jobs. is the backbone of what I do. It's what I utilize the most. It is super helpful, super easy to find people on there. Highly recommend it. And I'm not just being a company man on that. I'm speaking from true experience. When I moved to LA, you know, LinkedIn made it much easier for me to look for gigs.

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slash J-A-N-D-J to post your job for free. Terms and conditions apply. All right, we got a bunch of, a bunch of other shit to talk about today as well. We'll rev it up. We're going to get firing on all cylinders

here into the rest of the pod. Jingies and gentlemen, it's a place to be. If y'all had any idea how long it took to record that ad, my God. If you wonder why the episode's only nine minutes long today. It's because it took us

40 minutes to record the LinkedIn. And 39 and a half of those minutes were just pure laughter, dog. Oh, man. All right. Let's start with, let's start with Serena. The goat pulled off yet another incredible performance last night, beat the number two seed in the world at the U.S.

Open. Interviewer asked her afterwards if she was surprised that, you know, because she's about to retire. She's, you know, at the end of her career, she was surprised at the level she played with and she just laughed and said, I'm just Serena, you know? Do we have to say anything?

Do we need to add anything to what she said? I just thought that was like one of the greatest moments. Because postgame interviews are such a waste of everyone's time. Like our time, the athletes time, the interviewer's time. And that is like one of the great quotes ever to me. Yes. Yes. I mean, I think it's so interesting because it's like,

Like, you know, especially when when we've got, you know, athletes in the later stages of their career like Serena. And we're still in all of them. And they're just like, bro, this is what I do. You know what I'm saying? Like, this is what I do. This is what I've been doing for 25 years. This is what I wake up every morning and devote my life to. Like, I'm not amazed by it, but y'all might be.

Like, that's what I took from it. I mean, I thought like, dude, do you not know who she is? I'm not surprised by anything that woman does on a tennis court. Damn, there's anything she does on the planet. She's one of the greatest athletes. It's not the greatest athlete ever. So her beating somebody? You know what I'm saying?

Like, I don't think she would be surprised. I'm not surprised. Yes, it's a great feat. But this is what Serena has done her entire career. This is her life. You know what I'm saying? Like what she made it through just to get to where she's at. Of course Serena's not surprised.

She's been doing this their entire life. It's just an odd question for, I mean, I know they have to ask these questions. These are like the standard questions that need to be asked for them to write the, you know, whatever they're trying to write. But I just, it's to me is like, of course she's not surprised. Are you, but the fun, the great part is that she said, I'm just Serena. You know what I'm saying? So she basically said, I'm me, nigger, like, of course. This is what I do.

You know what I mean? And I love her standing on that. You know what I'm saying? That was beautiful. But yeah, she, she, I mean, were y'all surprised that she won? Surprised? I mean. I mean, I would say, I wouldn't say surprise.

I think it's incredible watching her. And it was the same thing. I think we've talked about this with Kobe's last game. Maybe Tigers playing the same way. I don't watch golf, so I don't know. But she talked about, she said, you know, since she came on the scene in 98, she was sort of getting to play free at that time. But she said later in the interview, she said, I've had a target on my back since 1999.

This is the first time in my professional career. I've been able to play with no expectations. with no like, I have to win this. She's like, I have nothing to prove to anyone, not even myself. There's no expectations. I can just go have fun. And that to me was the cool part because I think you could see too, especially in that third set.

You saw the fire kick in a little bit. She said she lost that second set and she was like, oh shit, this might be it. I better just cut it loose, you know. That to me, that's the most fun. That's the most fun part of it, you know, is just getting to see that. And then I love that Tiger Woods was there supporting her. I had no idea, but she said in the press conference afterwards, Tiger was like a big part of why she kept going. That the two of them had talked to each other and were like, fuck it.

Like, let's just go. Like, let's just run it back. Let's just go out there. And, you know, but if you think about like, we're all. Hey, Serena, it's me, Tiger. I know we're not firing on all cylinders. But, uh, let's know. The three of us grew up in that Tiger and the Williams sisters generation, right?

That was like they were the, like they were the comet that killed the dinosaurs. Right. And so the media that killed the dinosaurs. So like I just love seeing that I wasn't previously aware of any kind of a connection between them other than the one that I would have drawn in my head. So to know that they're like, they talked to each other like that was the, that made me so happy for some reason that was just like, this is great, dude. you know that they're supporting each other in that way. And they were both like, fuck it, we got all the money we could ever want. We want all the shit we could ever want.

Like, let's just go and be us, you know, and just enjoy that for a year or two. Did you all see Gladys Knight, formerly known as Dionne Warwick out there too? Gladys Knight. I love how it wasn't just one person who was wrong. It was like the whole fucking panel. They were like, wow, that is Gladys. No, it's not, motherfucker. Confidently said it.

And Gladys Knight. Confidently as fuck. Oh, shit. It's a, it's a very tough. I was going to say, I'm not surprised at Serena still being, you know, this excellent soul later in her career. I'm still in awe of it, though. You know what I mean? Like, you know, you can make the case she is the greatest athlete our country has ever produced.

Like, you know, I think it's an exact science to compare athletes across teen sports, you know, like, like you can't really compare Jordan and Gretzky and Brady. But we're talking like single athlete sports, it's Serena, bro. And I don't even think it's really a discussion. I mean, she's, yeah, she's on a peak. Nobody else has been on. All right. Can we make fun of, can we, can we enjoy how much, you got, did you guys see that, I hope I'm getting to read this to you.

Did you see the tweet of what Dwayne Wade said about Ron? No. Okay. This, if you ever needed proof that they're actually incredibly close friends, D. Wade said, quote, I know guys who rolled their ankle and are out four weeks. I've seen this guy roll his ankle and come back and give you 20 in the fourth. When God made him, he said, all right, I'm going to give you all of this, but I ain't going to give you a headline joke's coming. I knew a headline joke was coming. That's exactly what a friend would do.

I knew a headline joke was coming. Yeah, they friends for real, for sure. That's great. I love that. I hope one day any of us are successful enough that the others of us can be quoted talking shit about John does deserve to be the president of the United States but his fucking beard doesn't connect though The y'all remember when he had that piece

and he had like the headband cover in the front of it and at one point like the piece got pushed back like the unit I think he called it a unit A unit That's the technical term And like AD was like, yo, you know

You know, You'll fix your shit, bro fix that unit, bro You might need to go to the bathroom real quick Right No, I'm good, no, no, you're not good You need to go to the bathroom. I'm telling you you need to go to the bathroom

Right, right, right. Oh shit. All right, I need the background info on Tyler coming within a razor-thin slice of garlic away from tricking a politician into publicly endorsing

selling crack cocaine as a business enterprise. What the fuck? I haven't really tapped in on the J.C. JZ shit generally. I know everyone's been, everyone's yelling about something. I don't really know what's going on. I almost had that motherfucker dog.

I almost had them. All right, but it all kind of stems from, you know, Jay Z hopping in in a Twitter spaces last night. There's like a clip circulating that Rob Marksman posted shouts to the homie Rob. That's my dog for real. where J.C. just, you know, says a bunch of shit. It's just rich guy whining about like people not liking me, right? Like he basically said, you know, it's quote unquote trendy now to hate capitalism when I'm like, bro, all of us have hated capitalism. My whole lives, like none of us have ever enjoyed working. You know what I'm saying? But one of the things he said, you know, in this clip that was true is something that he's always said. And that is that, you know, the notion of pulling yourself up by the bootstraps, you know, all that bootstrap rhetoric bullshit, all that shit about how.

everyone in this country has the same opportunities regardless of where you come from and all that. Like, you know, he said that shit is a lie. He said it's a fallacy. And it's something that Jay has always said that. Right. Always said that. And, and, you know, that's not his first time sharing that with us. You know, he's never been on some bullshit bootstrap rhetoric. You know, like, like anyone who works just as hard as me can make it. Jay was always on some, I grew up black and poor and Marcy. I'm not supposed to be here. Right. Like, that's Jay's whole shit. The system was designed to, right, to kill me before I reached, maturely, yes.

Exactly. So, you know, being at that, you know, that's the shit that Jay has always said in his music. We had this politician, and I use the term loosely. By the name of Barrington Martin. Barrington. Barrington Martin. Barrington Martin. Who replied to that clip saying something like, oh, now the notion of pulling yourself up by your bootstraps is a lie when you wrapped about that all the time.

And I just had to comment on that because, for one, he was using a lie, you know, lying on Jay-Z's music to defend another lie, which is, you know, the bootstrap rhetoric. So too much lies. So it was too much lie. It was too much lies. Right, right. Bro doubled down on lies. He made like a lie double cheeseburger. And that shit just grinding my ears.

And I could not let that shit slide. And the thing is, I really only hopped on this because a politician said it. Right. Like if anyone besides a politician said that, I. wouldn't have cared, but this coming from a politician, I had to, you know what I'm saying? I had to dig into that a bit because my whole shit was, you know, Jay-Z made it out by selling drugs. So if you say that Jay-Z is spouting bootstrap rhetoric when he's talking about how he made it out by selling drugs and you believe in the validity of bootstrap rhetoric, then you believe

selling drugs is a viable means to pull yourself up by your bootstraps then, right? I just wanted this man to endorse crap as a part of this platform. He did it in a roundabout leeway, but that man just never flat out came and said, yes, I endorse drug dealing. I am Barrington Martin and this is my message. Sell crack. I approve. Never got to that point.

But yeah, it was close. It was close. I think, like, the thing, the thing that's funny about him is you hit him with a, like, philosophy 170 intro to logic, like, the construction of a logical argument. Like, if you believe that Jay-Z pulled himself up by his bootstrabs and you know, that Jay Z sold crack and you think that pulling yourself like you just hit him with that

and it was like he just turned into a tornado he was just like he didn't know what he was in he didn't know what he was in for it seemed it seemed like at first he just thought somebody was trying to prove him wrong then he did then he realized oh shit this motherfucker is just proven

that I said crack was a viable way to make it out and he's like holy shit you lure him into the deep water and he didn't really realize that shit. You know what I mean? That was, oh, perfect, bro.

That was hilarious. It was some of my best work. He might have lost one of the 1,200 people who voted for him in the last crime. You are one step away from screenshoting ballot peter results at that man. That would have been fucking ugly as fuck. This is you with your fucking... I would have loved.

I love to see his face when he realized it, though. When you said, wait, so you're saying that crack is a way to make it, is a viable way to make it out. How did we get here? Hell no, there's probably some lony tune shit, dog. But that was great. That's a wild misinterpretation of Jay-Z's entire body of work also. I mean, like that. And I know that it's like we met the stereotype is a.

like white dudes who are like working in an office and who think that Benny the butcher is like talking about like crushing your meeting. You know what I mean? But it's not only white people who make that mistake, you know what I mean? Where this like nipsy hustle was talking about I need to like really ask my boss aggressively to become the assistant regional manager. You know, like people really do. And like that's part of why rap music is successful is people are people project themselves into the music. but like the only thing j z and my my pop-op ever agreed on was that the only people in the rat race are rats you know right right right right that's the only thing they ever agreed on and that's for sure j z it's like the whole point of the way he came up was understanding that the

bootstraps thing was a lie when he was like 15 like that's that's the whole that's the whole message the entire fucking time and even when he's like even as his stuff's become you know know I know a lot of people find his recent stuff to be like overly pro-capitalism or commercial or whatever. I still see that as being like, look at how I beat the system by not buying into how fallacious it was. You know what I mean? Exactly. Exactly. Because the whole premise of bootstrap rhetoric, it is rooted in every manism. It is rooted in everyone can do this. Jay is, his whole shit is exceptionalism. I'm better than you. That's the closest thing he's got to bootstrap. You know what I'm saying? Right. Jay's whole shit is is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is,

I am a miracle, bro. I am not every man. That's Jay's whole shit. It is a complete answer. This is a bootshed rhetoric. And like I said, I didn't understand if it was just a misunderstanding of Jay's music or if he was just,

you know, fucking trying to, you know, go up for the bootstrap crowd, but not on my watch, sir. It was just a lie. He was just foolish. Like a lot of politicians. Yeah, but I think it's like when I was 13,

there was a lot of music that I thought was about your parents getting divorced that wasn't really about your parents getting divorced, you know what I mean? It's just people listen to music and because we have such an emotional connection to it, you like make it about you in a way that if you step back and aren't 13, should be, you know, very obvious or whatever. I don't know. To me, I would, I wouldn't, I wouldn't be surprised if a dude has hardly ever listened to any Jay-Z music. You know what I'm saying? Like, he's just saying some shit because there's no way you could

go from him saying, I'm an anomaly. You know what I'm saying? Like, I'm the LeBron of fucking rappers. You feel me? To him saying every man. Like, you haven't even, I don't care how many mental gymnastics you try to make, you try to use in order to make that, you know, pull yourself up by the bootstrap shit. Bro, you can't.

So I think he was just saying some shit. And Tyler was like, okay, you're just going to be talking. Well, I'm going to tie a knot with your ass. I know I have talked to. Yeah, for sure. Right. I'm in dangle this crack. talking too.

Exactly. I'm going to put this crack rock on a stick and a rope and dangling over your ass. The most recent theme of Jay-Z's music is that you could never marry Beyonce. You know what I mean? Oh. Crazy. Anyway, we need to visit a campaign stop and bring some of those hairloom tomatoes that that comedian got hit with. Shout out to like a half dozen of y'all

tweeted us underneath the video of that shit, which I appreciate. That motherfucker guy hit that. So someone said, that shit was loud as hell. That shit wasn't nowhere near ripe. God damn. Wait, so I didn't, I didn't listen to it on volume. I just saw the video. Oh, you need to hear it.

You need to hear it. Oh, it's a, it sounds like you. It's a doozy. It's a dinger. It's a dinger. It's a dinger Tuesday. A hum dinger, Bubba. It sounds like someone hit a fucking watermelon with a baseball bat.

He got fucking, I'm surprised he was still on his feet, honestly. Okay, is this a stick or like that they stick to it? He's wearing a garbage bag, so it had to have been. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Because then someone else threw, Tyler pointed out, someone else threw one. As soon as he started staggering, someone threw another one. Someone went for the kill shot. Almost connected to.

Got to make sure he did, man. baby, you feel me? All right. I want to introduce a new segment because the three of us have a shared hobby that we don't, we talk about quite a bit in the group chat, but we don't talk all that much about on the podcast. Does this involve Megastalian? I did not need to make you nervous when I said that, but.

Okay. What did you say it was? Does this involve Megynastallion because we shall not be talking about that in depth? No. I'm a married man. Goddeme. It involves the fact that all three of us. us greatly enjoy annoying our wives.

Yes. One of my favorite pastimes. Oh, my God. And I think all three of us probably do it enough and are good at it enough that we could probably do a midweek check-in on. What did you do to annoy your wife this week? But Tyler wins the first wife annoyer of the week award with this fucking... That motherfucker, dog, that clip with that motherfucking mouse singing of Kate Bush

running up the hill about selling avocados to God. Yes. That is the funniest shit, man. I was thinking that shit all yesterday, annoying the fuck out of summer. She was bad as hell. Congrats. Sulu.

Why is it so fun? I don't understand. Why is it so fun to annoy our wives? Where does that come from? It's a love language, I feel like. I feel like if there's dedication in it. You are dedicating some time. You're dedicating, you know, some effort.

You're dedicating some, some thought. It's, you know what I'm saying? You're putting thought and effort and time into all of this shit. You know, just to get, you know, on her nerves just a little bit. That's love, bro. I feel like rather so much better at me in a lot of things that this is the one thing I can claim. You know what I mean? I'm way more annoying than you.

Same. You can't compete when it comes to just me being annoying. And it's natural to me. I was born this way. You feel me? So, I don't know, it's just, it's just fun. I love, like, and, like, it's, it's, there's so much love shown in the times that I annoy her that. Y'all, do y'all peep that?

We're like, I'm annoying to shit out of me. And she's like, God, stop that shit. But she's also has a little eye where she's like, I hate you, but I love you. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, this is cute, you know? Like, it's, I don't know, man. It's, it's cool to people to appreciate, you know, even like the, the, the most annoying parts of you so for sure into that my uh my most annoying thing i did this week was i was calling everything

crudite which is a word that i learned recently because of the fuck does that you mean i feel like i've heard it before crudite is like a vegetable platter and the the way that i heard about it was that um the republican candidate for senate in pennsylvania which is dr oz was trying to make a video that was like about how bad inflation was oh yeah so he's trying to make like an everyman video so he goes to like he goes to like the fanciest grocery store in his city or whatever and he's like you know i'm here uh i'm trying to buy some vegetables because my wife wants to make a crudeate this motherfucker i've been calling everything because sharp made chili and rice a couple nights ago and i was talking about some crudite hey i've been seeing kelly price all week and it's been

annoying the fuck out of rother What's on? He's going to rain. That first part where she's like, you know what I mean? Like, I got something to tell you. I've been singing that shit. She's like, do you know any other other words? Please just say that.

I just been annoyed her doing that shit. And it just was natural to me. I just couldn't get out of my head. Right. I couldn't get out of my head. It's just such a good song. You feel me? You can left-handed, right?

You need, you know who me? Extremely left-handed. You and I are both left-handed. I heard that's a left-handed. thing because the same thing happens to me I'll get like one sentence from a song or like four notes from a melody stuck in my head for like a week. Bro, I was on a walk with Somi and heard like this, there's this particular house where like they always, there's always an argument or yelling coming out of the house. So that I walk by, if I walk by during times where people

are awake, there's just always something going on. So it makes sense that, you know, she pulls out the house, you know, playing, it's going to rain. You know what I mean? Because it's raining every day in that motherfucker. It's a dark cloud in that bitch. You know what I'm saying? But it's a great song. I was like, yo, what Kelly Price song was that?

I looked it up. And I've been singing that shit for two weeks, bro. This week it just kind of peaked a little bit. She was like, my gee, bro. Can we please learn some other words or something? But anyway. Speaking of songs that get stuck in your head, my kids started school this week

and Maya came home and really fucked me up with some information. Are you aware the song Patty Cake? Are you aware that it is not, the actual lyrics of the song is not patty cake? It's pat a cake. That's stupid.

I don't want it to be that. Y'all strip the shit out of my... It's like we learn these things it strips the shit out of my, like, you know, my youth. I didn't know anything, you know what I mean? Everybody was saying patty cake. Did they change that? Is that one of those weird things that, you know, like seemed a particular way but wasn't?

Like the Mandela effect or whatever? The Mandela effect? Yeah. The Berenstine Bears thing. You feel me? Because that, I swear that shit was fake too, bro. It was never, you know what I mean? Some of that shit they planned with us.

I feel like this might be the same situation. You feel me? Yeah, I mean, everyone says it's like everyone now, so, but apparently the song is from like the fucking 16. hundreds in England or something when it was like actually how they would make food and it was pat a cake because that's what they did to keep it

whatever supple. I don't know. It's not about like the bubonic plague or something. Yeah, that's what's the grim part? Were they making humans or so? Were they making babies? Were they baking? Vernon people at the steak. Pate cake. Patic cake baker's mad. That's how they were getting

a witch as fast as you can. You feel what I? Like. Yeah, because like like the ring around the Rosie's nursing round. That's about the bubonic plate. Right, right, right, right. They would have like black welts with red outlines and ashes, ashes, we all fall down. And they all died. And they had a whole last song about that shit. Didn't they have to burn the bodies though or something? They had to burn. They burn, did they not burn the bodies or something? Yeah, yeah. They were burned bodies.

Yeah. Cut to us in 1991 on the grass. I'm in Long Beach, holding hands with my fourth grade girlfriend and my best friend. And every time we got to, we all fall down. We'd throw ourselves on the ground, giggling, writhing around, having the best time ever, singing a song about a third of the world. Dying. Dying. Running around the Rosie. Jesus Christ.

Do y'all remember four square? Do y'all remember that? Did you all play that? They still play four square. And handball. I was wondering. I was on a, I was on a little playground. I'm like, I wonder if they still play four square.

I honestly think I'd probably be top five percent. I would be on a. Cedar Bluff, I'm cooking, not Cedar Bluff, it was Bluegrass. Blue, blue, bluegrass elementary. Fifth grade, bro. Once I got to that four square, bro, it's over with. You're going to see me all recess, nigga.

Ten toes, motherfucker. Feel me? I think by sixth grade, we were just playing basketball. Elementary school, we play handball. And they still play handball. Yeah, and Vinny's still, Vinnie's fucking great at handball.

He would come home last year and be like, I won seven times a handball. handball today. Jesus. Ben is a cheeko, lo, keto. Godly, man. That boy, an athlete.

All right. I'm built different. That's what he's literally. He's built different. Literally. He'd come home in a bad mood and I'd be like, you know, real emotional with the kids.

Like, what happened? Fucking lost two games of handball today. All right. That never happens. It never happens of any, not cool guy. All right, buddy. Okay.

That's fine, right? That's not really that big of a deal. Never again. I'm going to go practice handball. I don't have time to play video games with your dad. Pick myself by my bootstrettes. Pick myself up. We listen to Jay-Z.

That's what he told me to do. He wasn't firing on all cylinders that day. He needed to get the right trainer. He needed to search for the right trainer. Who writes that? What's up? Where does firing an all cylinder? That's a car thing?

Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's a car. When would you use that? When would you use that? In life? Yes. Corny, corny work talk maybe. Never in real life personal shit. I think firing all cylinders is going further,

where I might think like this ain't corny to you, you really use this shit. Yeah, because you don't have to use firing of all cylinders for me to think you're a company man. I think you're actually a company man if you're saying that. You know what I mean? Yeah, that's in you for real. Right, right, right. If you said, like, we'll circle back, I'll be like, but I'll think, like, maybe he's doing that because that's what

you do. This is work speak. Firing on all cylinders, bro, you've drank the Kool-A, my nigga. You might have made it. You feel what I'm saying? You are deep into makes-just, God. You're a robot. You're the work Illuminati, nigga. You feel me? For real. You accepted the offer from Instagram. Oh, fuck Jimmy Jimmy Oh, we go Oh, we go on, move on, move on.

They got another boat stuck in the Suez Canal. Did y'all see this shit? No. This is the most embarrassing shit, bro. Come on. Just steer it straight. That can't have as fuck, though, bro. Like, what the fuck?

That canal little as hell. How to fuck a boat? One boat. Fuck up a whole canal. That little. ask it now, man. Is you going to have the same effect? How long has it been stuck?

Is it the same situation? I think they might have already got it unstuck. I just remember I looked down and I definitely had that deja vu moment where you, you know, they talk about the simulation or whatever. And I had a good five seconds where I was like, this happened, right? Like I'm pretty sure I remember making fun of this. This happened before. I swear to simulation be just getting like bored and losing creativity and just doing

things again. You feel me? Also, one of my home girls. made a great point. Sometimes she thinks like if you lose your keys and they're like you looking for too long and you find it in a place you've already look God's just like here man.

Like we'll find out. All right you look long enough here, man. Here are the keys dog like we'll help you out a little bit. The simulation I don't know God, whatever but since I think it'd be repeating itself on some like ah fuck it shit you know what I mean? Right. Our first sale from the new Jenkins and Jones

consulting firm. Make the canal a little bit wider. You know? Just make it a little bit wider. Change it. Yeah. They had the technology to make it however many decades ago. I'm sure we have the technology to just make it a little bit wider.

Not the widest. I mean, the boats have gotten bigger. Right. Make the canal a little bigger. Those boats, because they come into the port in Lombie, those boats are city size, bro. They're fucking huge. Like, it's crazy.

Unsettling when you're close to them. You know what I'm saying? man like for sure that's why I saw OGs at work at the fucking port bro. Although that's what the longshoreman is like that's the that's a 1920s. That's a bad ass. Hey, that's a that's a that's a 1920s union. Talk about the unions left in America that would like, you know, do whatever they needed to do to maintain their position or whatever.

You know what I mean? That's the mob bubble. The people that's the mob bubble. The people who work unloading those ships. All right. I had a revelation when I was a... That's where Jay got his crack from. A viable way to work your way out of poverty.

I'm Barrington Martin. And I endorse crack. Right. And I support crack. Legalized crack. Oh, shit. It. Jenkins and Jones

a place to be. The porters of the crack trade. You know, Twitter's been around long enough for us to all know that when you first sort of, you pull the glove off and you're thinking about slapping someone, just do a little follower count check, bro. You know what I mean?

This dude thinks I'm wrong about Jay-Z. I got this many followers. He has this many followers. Maybe I have something better to do with my night. You know what I mean? Right, right, right. And even if you're right, if that person has like 17 times amount of followers you do, you're wrong.

You're going to lose argument. You're going to lose. Okay. And in Tyler's case, when that person has more followers than you and is right, it's really going to be an unenjoyable evening free. And is Tyler and has that brain. Good luck, Bubba's. And it's about crack.

Who is on crap. and Stephen A said All time Stephen All time Stephen A clip All time Stephen A quit Jesus Um Woo

I was grocery shopping Oh here we go And I was looking at the cookie dough And I was thinking to myself I like what this is going I wish I could just sit down with this cookie dough right now And then I had a moment of sadness

Where I was like Someone's gonna buy this cookie dough And fucking turn it into cookie dough and fucking turn it into cookies. And that's wrong. No. And I had the thought I really strongly believe that cookie dough is better than cookies and that ovens basically exist to ruin cookie dough.

Oh, wow. That is a high take indeed. That is a take. I don't know. Bro, I think cookies are like one of the best inventions like that humans have come, like I think like if everybody talks about if the aliens come. You know what I mean? Like, what would you bring them?

Like, I think cookies would be like eighth, ninth on the list. You know what I'm saying? Like, of things to show like, this is our, like, we are, we are, we are, you should value us as humans. We created this. You feel me? So I don't know. Like, cookie dough is good.

I'm not anti-cookie dough here. Yeah. Cookie dough ice cream held me down in hard times, you know, back when I was selling crack to make it out of poverty. But, you know, I think cookies. are a better product. I agree. I agree.

Cookie dough ice cream is the shit, though. Oh my God. It's the shit. That Ben and Jerry's, ooh. Turtle tracks, too. People don't talk about turtle tracks enough, highly slept on. Very good ice cream. We talk about moose tracks, but not turtle tracks.

Different. Yeah, different. They are different. Facts. The cookie dough ice cream is actually what started my thought process on this cookie dough shit because I had, and look, bro, sometimes, you know, we all work long hours, whatever, sometimes just that little ice cream or your nectarine or whatever the fuck

you can have at the end of the day, sometimes that's your shit, right? Right, right, right. I opened up a brand new pint of fucking Hagenas chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. It's the cookie doughiest fucking ice cream out there. So good. It had like melted in transport and re-frozen or something because that's your shit? Yeah. But the ice cream was all like chalky and the fucking cookie dough was not more.

moist. It was like a little fucking rock, bro. And it literally, I looked at Sharr and I was like almost on the verge of tears. And I was like my ice cream is fucked up. And it's like, you know, it's like 10.30 is like I can't. I'm not, I'm not going to the store. You know what I mean? Like I'm about to go to bed. I was like, but the whole day I'm like, I'm about to fucking crush some cookie. You know what's great about this? You're brilliant. You're a brilliant man. Fucking Shar is maybe the smartest. Like top. 100 smartest motherfuckers in California. And you are looking at each other. Char. Bam. My cookie dough is fucked up. Like, that is great to me. It's, I love that.

I love that. But anyway, I still think cookies are better. I want to ask you question. Fair. Are y'all a fan of Edie's ice cream? Are y'all fan of Edie's? The double-wipped ice cream? I haven't had it.

tapped into 80s? It's really good. It's really soft. If you're in ice cream, you might want to tap it at. I think you should. I don't like it too soft, though. I do like a very frozen hard ice cream. It's not, wow, you like hard ice cream? Do you like salt and straw? Do you like it to melt in my mouth? You like salt and straw? Yeah, uh, yeah, I've only been there like once. It was good. Okay, okay. Because that's, that's my shit right now, honestly. Salt and straw. So, salt and straw. Yeah, we go like once a week. I am a gentrified ice cream guy. I will say that. You and I talked about, We both prefer the original donuts. You know what I mean?

Yeah, yeah. Your history, when it comes ice cream. But ice cream, I will, you know, I don't like all the weird flavors. Shar will eat like lavender ice cream and shit. You know what I mean? I'm not into that. Just give me a really unique, delicious mint chocolate chip or cookie dough or whatever. I like a nice, I like a little caramel in my shit.

Caramel little salt. You know what I mean? Like, that's my whole shit, you feel me? They got a nice carrot cake one that they're doing for this month. I want to tap into it. All right. Anyway. Before we get out of here, John,

big ice cream guys here at G's and Jones. Dude, we are. You know, that was my whole shit with my cholesterol and all that. It was just that they were like, they're like, and I was like, dude, I don't do. They're like, do you do this and this? And I was like, no, man, I don't do shit. I don't drink.

I'm like, I'm the most boring motherfucker ever. And they were like, do you, what about desserts? And I was like, oh, yeah. They're like, how much ice cream you eat? Yeah, I know, bro. Exactly. is the meal. But I was like, you know, like late 20s or whatever.

They're like, how much ice cream you eat? I was like, I don't know. I just, I never eat more than like a, you know, one of the little pints. And they're like, how often do you do that? And I was like, I don't know, like three to five times a week. Every day, maybe. That's much ice cream. Oh, shit.

All right. John, did you watch House of Dragons yet? I did watch it. I did watch it. I love that fucking shit, bro. Fuck Otto. I'm, I'm, I'm, first 15 minutes. Okay.

So, spoiler alert. I forgot to do the spoiler alert on the fucking on the last one. Look, you obviously understand if you're listening to the show. We're going to talk about it in the middle of the week and everyone's going to tweet about it. I still see people on Twitter complaining Sunday nights about people tweeting spoilers.

Like, that's what's going to happen. Watch a shit Sunday night. Self control. Turn off the, turn off, put the phone down. So you're on, all right. So anyway, this is what we're ending on. So if you haven't watched it, then, you know, maybe don't listen to it. John's on Team Fuck Auto.

how do y'all feel? Otto's the hand? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I haven't learned all the names either, honestly. So, yeah. How do y'all feel about?

I am with you on that. And I, the, a big reason I am team fuck Otto is because I put some thought into it. And I do not think that Damon made that air for a day toast. We never saw him say it. Otto was the one who told. the motherfucking king that he said it. Damon never denied it, all right? You know, but I say, I think Dame is the type

to not explain himself regardless, right? I think he looks at himself like, I don't need to answer to anybody, even if it's cleaning up a lie, right? And he said that, that shit, you know, we all grieve in our own ways when, when, you know, he was asked if he said it because he's the black sheep of the family and I think he knows his brother blaming him, you know, I think he was fine with, with, with children that grief, right?

I think he knows that that his brother's, used to, you know, picking on him, coming down on him when shit goes bad. So I think he was fine with that. I don't think Damon said it. I think Otto setting up because Otto kept pushing his daughter on the motherfucking king. Nasty work. Nasty work. Nasty, right?

So, yeah. So I don't trust that motherfucker either. I'm with you, dog. Fake-ass little finger. Fuck that nigga, dog. Fuck that nigga. I think, I think Damon, I think he accepted it because he knew he was going to be the air and he fucks with his niece heavy.

And he thinks his niece would be a great air. And so I feel like he's solid. in that way where like that's why he didn't explain himself because he fucks with his niece in a particular way and his niece really wants you know you see their conversations they seem like there's a lot of respect and love between them for sure he's he's really pro his niece so that's what it seems like to me i just think otto's a muff he's shady he's shady he's he's selfish to the point like you said when he puts his daughter on the king you know what i'm saying and and even like the corliss like with him like i was i was wanting to rule for him you know what i'm saying but like

him pushing his what 12 year old daughter on the king queen 12 year old daughter on the on the on the king for like you know for for for for so to show the power of the realm and all that like I don't bro man it's it's it's the mom say you won't have to have you don't have to sleep with it until you're 14 right and so like and so that's that's that's gross you know and just anyway but um so like i don't even for that time period it just seems like But I just feel like I feel like it's shaping up similar to how the last one like

you kind of like hate everybody a little bit I don't know who's gonna be the John Snow where I just really fuck with that person yet but I think I think in the end I'm gonna like Damon and one reason I like him too is because McCorless came to him even though him and his brother

was where at odds he said I will say things about my brother like that but you won't my nigga you know what I'm saying like that's still my motherfucking brother and even if we at odds and he don't banish me and even threaten my life with this weak-ass hand Otto, I don't give a fuck about that. You know what I'm saying? That's my fucking brother and I will off your ass right here. You know what I'm saying? I'm saying off the

strength of that shit. And I think that's solid as fuck. And so I feel like I kind of fuck with Damon. He's a fuck up and he's a little asshole, but I think he's solid. You know what I'm saying? So we'll see. We'll see. I definitely more solid than Otto. My other thing about Otto is they made a point to show that his daughter has that nervous habit with her fingernails. She's like ripped her fingers up to where they're bloody. And I had a friend who had that issue and that friend had a single parent and that single parent was like wild fucking abusive.

You know what I mean? And that was just because of that personal story, that was the first thing I thought of was like, I wonder if this dude is like the worst dude in the fucking world. And that's what's causing her like nervousness and anxiety. You know what I mean? Isn't she, isn't she gay? I thought she was. I thought his daughter.

I thought they said something like liking girls. Maybe I misheard that. But. Yeah, Tyler, I didn't hear it. I mean, it definitely seemed like she and Renehranis might be, you know. Yeah, when she was talking to the neat, to the neat, like Renearest, it sounded like they had a conversation where she was insinuating that she liked women to. Something.

Maybe I trip. Maybe I trip. Yeah, yeah. Okay. But, but I mean, during that time period also, I guess, you know, that's just not, you know, it. You feel me? You know what I'm saying?

So I imagine that could be one reason she. you know that she's nervous like that too but yeah I don't know man I don't know but yeah I wouldn't put it past I don't being just horrible because I think that's how he seems Tyler what do you think of Damon's dragon that motherfucker looks stupid that bitch neck long as fuck

I'm like god damn and of course all the fucking nerdy like well actually he's known as the uh the bloodworm he's very vicious I don't give a fuck he looks stupid I'm a motherfucker I'm a fucking Gary I was like bro that motherfucker looks like a Gary

he screeched I was like dog this motherfucker need to drink some WD40 that shit was rusty as fuck long ass and throat right God damn vocal cords rusty as hell

oh shit oh shit man bro you have to really look stupid to look stupid as a dragon you know what I mean like you gotta be exceptionally fucking foolish looking for somebody to be like

damn you are a dragon, but you like, extra ugly. Like, you're different. Dragon's just, they're ugly. Every piece of them, the parts that put them together are ugly. And he is exceptionally ugly for the ugliest beings on the planet. You know what I'm saying?

Or mythical beings. It's crazy. But yeah, fuck Gary. Fucking Barrington the Magic Dragon. Right. Right. Right. Damon deserved better than that for so. Long neck ass dragon. You look like a tremor. That's what it looked like.

Remember remember the trimmers? That's what it looked like a fucking tremor. You don't even look like a dragon, dog. A trimmer with wings, bro. Fuck out of here. A tremor. A chicken body. I don't need a bloodworm.

I need a dragon. Okay. I need a worm with wings. It's very, actually very vicious. Be fuck out of here, man. It looks stupid, like you said, Tyler. I do. John, you mentioned that you end up with this show.

You end up hating everyone a little bit. And I also just appreciate, like, only Game of Thrones or House of Dragons or whatever has you, like, Shah and I are sitting there on the couch, like, obviously you've got to marry the 12 year old. And then, you know what I mean? And he makes the other decision. You're like, this stupid motherfucker didn't marry the 12 year old. Everything that comes now is on your head, you fucking dumb ass.

That's what I was thinking too, bro. That's the only, just the only show that ever have you saying some shit like that and not immediately turning the television off. Jesus Christ. Bro, like, like, like I dead ass think we're probably going to wind up rooting for Damon and Ranari to get together, bro. We probably are. Watch.

What the fuck? Uncle and a niece. Oh, God. Tough. They gonna do us like that? That's a tough thing. Yeah, you might be right. That's a tough scene.

Jesus Christ. I don't know. It's coming. I promise you, but what's funny is, remember when it was a season eight, the last episode, last it was season eight of a, uh, we, we were like,

we'll never a plan. appointment watch TV ever again. Appointment watching this motherfucker like a motherfucker. They got us. They got us again. They got us again. I'm back to sarcastically calling Summer, your grace and all types of shit,

bro. I am back in. Bro, they got us again. So quick. They didn't even have to work for it. You know what I'm saying? Just gave it to them. Damn, bro.

Sheesh. Tyler, I read a little bit more. I put in the group chat that the showrunner said that he's leaving the show also. I read a little bit more about it and actually it made me really sympathized with the dude. He worked on Game of Thrones and was so like hurt and distraught

by what happened in the last season that he told HBO, I know you're working on a prequel, don't ever fucking call me to do anything with this shit ever again because this has been so hard and hurtful. And HBO apparently went to him. Yeah.

And was like, we need you to set it right. Like we need someone who really who was there who helped make it great. We need you to help set it right. and so he agreed to come back for the one season which is done and then at the end of the season he was like all right

I gave you all a great fucking season bringing this other person who was like working on all this shit with me and you know they could do it but I respect that they literally called her back and was like even though no one except the nerdiest of TV people have ever heard of you this is your legacy all right

all right that's all the time we got a programming note we are going to enjoy the holiday weekend we're not recording on Sunday. I really hope no one listened to this is working on Monday. If you're working on Monday, tell your boss that Jenkins and Jones says that you should

be on LinkedIn jobs. Try to get the fuck out of your place. Or selling crack. Start selling crack. We advise one of two courses if you're working on Labor Day. Number one, search on the internet for another job. Number two, start selling crack. You're just an

entrepreneur, you make your own schedule. It just happens to be cracked. That's all. All right. That's all the time we got. We'll see y'all Thursday next week. I hope everyone has a great holiday weekend and bye. Bye.