The Herd with Colin Cowherd - Jenkins and Jonez - Winter Weather, Weird Ice Cream, and White Vernacular

Episode Date: December 22, 2022

The guys discuss the extreme temperatures in Wyoming, the Phoenix Suns reportedly selling for $4 billion, the Chiefs superfan who got arrested, Lil Yachty’s interesting claim, The Horny Ice Cream Tweet, white vernacular, and more. #Volume #HerdSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Gambling problem, call 1-800 gambler or visit Fandul.com slash RG. Welcome to Jenkinson Jones on the Volume Podcast Network. It is Thursday, December 22nd. And as always, we're coming to you live at 7 a.m. West Coast, 10 a.m. East Coast on the Amazon AMP app. Hello, if you're listening on the Amazon AMP app. And as always, podcasts will be uploaded to all your other feeds once we're done with the live record. Christmas, right around the corner. You can get you some mooch. Mois. Some moich. Moich at the volume.com. Search Jenkins and Jones. They got a bunch of great shirts and hoodies and croonax you can get over there. and one housekeeping note this is our last podcast until January 2nd

we are taking Christmas week off some of us are going out of state some of us are merely going to relax which I'm very jealous of Tyler but yeah this is our last show so at the very end of the podcast I will be very delighted to get a

see you next year joke off but you're going to be be that guy. So fella, we better make it a good one. This gotta last everyone for a fucking week and a half. As always, Jenkins & Jones hosted by Legetro Jenkins, aka John. What's that?

Bubbaus. Dragonfly Jones, aka Tyler. Hey, everybody has a gun. I'm Garty B. A.k.a. Mike. Motherfucking Mike. And I do think we've got a good episode for people. Everyone should know that John is wearing a very high press rate hat today for the

recording, this special occasion. I hit Mike like, yo. I mean, this is like a pinwheel almost. It got like all different materials and shit. I'm like, yo, what of the chances I'm going to get pressed with this? He's like, let me ask gangland guard. You check it in for duty. Let me ask my gangland homies.

John's wearing the fucking, the most in-your-face fucking Philly's hat possible, which he's wearing only to record and not when he walks out the door in L.A. I'm not in the house in this Pow-Roo hat, nigger. I bought it because I've been one in the fifth. really the maroon would look crazy and I'd be like I saw this one and I was like damn this shit hard but I'm like I'm gonna get it we'll see what happened let me hit let me hit Mike first before I put it on my head I'm bro I thought I might have aged out nigga I'm 40 now man number one you don't look like you're 40 and number two you chose to live where you chose to

live is more suburban places in southern California uh that you could be in and that's not where you choose to be my brother's yeah I guess I can't wear a hat I get people of color around me. I get some niggas around me. You know what I'm saying? It's a tradeoff. You feel what I? It's just like,

it's just the funny thing about you sending the picture of the hat is that in Southern California, a Philly's hat is like you, it was like a parody of a hat. Like if we were 13 year old white kids making a, you can't leave the house in this hat in L.A. Like that's the hat we'd be talking about. You know what I mean?

Or maybe the Houston Astros shoe. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's right. Right, right. Down in my area, the, that's not, the, the H influence is not as strong. It's a little bit different. But for sure. All right. All right. Let's talk about, from John's bright red hat to the darkest blue weather. You haven't seen this hat how long, bro? You might, you only know one dude has probably put this hat on your entire life. And he put it off for a different reason that you would have. Right, right, right. I'm trying to be cute, man. He was trying to let niggas know what time. was, you feel me? I ain't on that type of time, you feel? From the brightest red. It is not worth getting your ass beat for a hat that Lenny Dykes wore, bro. Better reason to get your ass beat than that, though. It's a beautiful fucking hat. It's a classic, but nah. All right, from the brightest red to the

deepest blue. Let's talk about the weather in fucking Wyoming. I set you all this screenshot. I cannot believe this. Much of the northern half of America is currently embroiled in, uh, They call it a bomb cyclone? I had never heard of this. They make up new shit every year for these storms, bro. Every year I'd come up with something new. It's like Transformers when we were kids every year. It's like, we know you already got Optimus Prime, so now he's a dinosaur.

Right. Now he's a fucking, now he's a gorilla. This year we have the bomb cyclone. You know what I mean? I fuck with it, though. I can't wait for the new extreme weather rollouts every year. What kind of mood is this? Oh, this is the steel-toed moon.

The steel-toed blood moon. I know a nigga that lived in Minnesota. He said it would get so cold that he would get boiling water, boil it, throw it out the back of his house, and it would turn into, like, mist, like, by the other body. Like, it would freeze immediately. Boiling water, gee. That's how cold it gets up there, dog.

There was a nigga I knew, a white nigga I knew that I knew live in Montana. White nick, can I say that only cold? a white nigga I knew. I thought I left that in 2014. I said that in Hellas. But anyway, but yeah, he was Montana. He said he would drive down the street and there's so much snow over time

that you couldn't see the houses next to you. You know what I mean? So, like, because it would pile up, pile up. It didn't melt to the end of the season. So yeah, G, I guess, I mean, that's just how you living out there. If you decided live out there, gee. Well, and I know John and I in Southern California

to get a little bit nicer weather than Tyler gets in Richmond. But I don't think Tyler you've ever had what they're going through in Montana and Wyoming and shit where I say y'all in Missoula, Montana, which is not a big city, but it's a city people live in. It was negative 70 degrees overnight. Hell no, man. Come on, bro. Human should not live like that, bro.

Negative 70? You should not be asked to live like that. The high in Wyoming today is negative 40. Like for the whole state. That's the high. And there are parts where it's negative 70 and et cetera. I mean, like that, it sounds made up. Like, what's the difference between negative 40 and negative 70?

Like, how are we able to even measure that? I don't know. What is that in Celsius? Like four or something? How ridiculous is Celsius? That's probably like two or something, minus one or something. Right? It'd be negative, yeah, like negative eight or something.

Yeah. I would never understand Celsius. Canadians would be online like, It's so hot. I do not want any more 13 degree weather. Right. I'm like, what the type of world do you live in? Bro.

That's the metric system, right? That's the only thing the metric system fucked up, I think is Celsius. It's not actually the, it's just, it's the metric system by analogy in that it's also different from what we use. Okay, okay. The only thing they got right is zero degrees is freezing temperature. That's where ice freezes. I actually, you know, I'm going to speak up in defense of the Fahrenheit scale.

We are not water. And so freezing as the basis point of zero to me, like, 50 degrees is cold. That seems about right. Like 100 degrees is hot. 50 degrees is cold and zero degrees is really cold. I think Fahrenheit, I think fair and high, I think fair. I like Fahrenheit. I guess that.

You know what I mean? Fairhigh is right. Yeah. The standard high system is trash as fuck, but we got Fahrenheit system right. Right. Right. I'm not, I would never defend ounces. You know what I mean?

I would never do it. H ounces and gallons and quartz and. all that shit y'all keep all that but yeah feet are literally from feet bro like like how long someone's foot was but it was not 12 inches though people's feet are 12 inches hell yeah 12 inches I think 12 inches is like a size 10 pretty much that's like the average yeah yeah my feet are 14 15 inches long wow my feet are bigger than my foot is bigger than the foot that's crazy I don't know about your feet what size shoe do you are 11 I'm sorry I don't mean that to ask you what size shoot you were.

What's wrong? What's wrong? What's that? You want to do you want to know my dick size too? I can drop that off on here too. You know, rather might not be happy, but I might. Or you can go back to our podcast.

We was definitely talking about it in episode three. Daddy Dick per year over here. Big Magnum boy. You caught Tyler Daddy Dick for like fucking four months on the, on the old pod. And I think before we, yeah, the good old day. Before we knew each other, I think I, I tweeted it, John.

I was like, you really been looking for any excuse for two months to bring up time. Bro, we can say this now before, for a point, it was our password. Because we chased it. Facts. It was daddy dick. I was like, yeah, that's the password. That's what we go on. D.D.

here. Oh, shit. All right, let's talk a little sports. Spoits. Matt. Sports. Talk some sports.

Make sure to get your moor. When you listen to us talk sports. Eat a boiga why you're at it. Boyga. All right. Matt Ishbiyah has purchased the Phoenix Suns for $4 billion, becoming the NBA's youngest owner at 42 years old. I want to talk a little bit more about Matt Ishbia

because there's some interesting backstory there but before we do that I just wanted to get your guys' reaction to the $4 billion price tag and what you think about this move. I know we were hoping that it would be that the Sarver prophecy would come true on the identity of a new owner but

this nigger need these niggas need a nigger I'll go here and say it for you, Mike. I got you, man. But what did you think of four, but $4 billion for the Sons is definitely a like market mover in terms of what pro sports franchises are worth in this country. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I think that sounds about right because like, you know, the Clippers went for like what,

$4 billion back in 2014, 15. In L.A. That's L.A. That's L.A. Right. So, you know, adjusted for, you know, cost of living or whatever the fuck have you, you know, four million and four billion in Phoenix, you know, about. eight years later sounds about right but I mean I mean I don't know shit about the guy really I

just understand he's a basketball dude I think like Jason Richardson tweeted out that they played ball together in Michigan State or something if I'm not mistaken so I mean you got a basketball guy running a basketball team I think that's what Jason Richardson said I'm saying he was just on a team he didn't actually play I don't remember seeing him yeah okay yeah but um but yeah I mean you you got a basketball guy youngish guy you know I'm interested to see how this happens I mean because usually usually the people we see who get into this are 70 year old people who don't give a fuck about basketball, right? And we've got a young guy who is a basketball guy, so I'm interested to see how this plays out. I heard that he was like, people was dropping a bunch of shit talking about how

bad he was of an owner as far as like running companies and stuff like that. I'm thinking like, dog, who isn't trash when you get to that position? You know what I mean? Who that has $400 to, $4 billion to spend, $400? $4 billion to spend, you know what I'm saying, isn't a trash human? I don't know. But yeah. I mean, I don't, I don't know. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't know how to feel about them. I don't know shit about the dude. You know, I'm just glad Sarva's not running anymore. You know what I'm saying?

We'll see how we see if this dude is better at not being trash, I guess. Well, let me, let me give you some info from a tweet thread, tweeted out there by Joe Pompiliano. How much satisfaction did you get out of saying that? It's a Pompiliano. I got a lot of satisfaction. So NBA's youngest owner, but he also has a very intense, unfriendly rivalry with Dan Gilbert, the Cavs owner, which some people close to Matt Isbia think may have helped prompt his decision to acquire an NBA team, which is kind of wild. Both those guys did go to Michigan State. Matt Ishbia was indeed a walk-on on the basketball team, played 40 minutes in a four-year career.

but did win a national championship and go to three consecutive final fours. He took over his dad's company United Wholesale Mortgage, which is the company's biggest mortgage lender and the chief competitor to Dan Gilbert's Quicken Loans, right? Which is where their rivalry comes. But Matt Isbiyah, who styles himself and does seem to be, I'm not going to say that there's good billionaires, but when they went public, which they did recently, Recently, they did a very generous bonus package for all the employees and gave every single employee in the company equity ranging from $1,000 to $100,000.

They also spend $25 million on annual bonuses and $35 million on new stock compensation. But his rivalry with Dan Gilbert has been fairly contestuous a couple of years ago when Rocket Mortgage laid off 2,000 people right around the holidays. Matt Ishbia posted on Facebook. Disappointed is the nicest way to describe my thoughts around Rocket Mortgage laying off over 2,000 people, as this should not be necessary for a company that made over $5 billion last year in profits. I hate seeing this type of negative impact on families in Metro Detroit. These 2,000 people will struggle to find new jobs.

And I think it's disgusting that they're thinking short term and are solely focused on cutting a few million per month in costs. this is the wrong thing to do to people. Proud that we have not had a single layoff in 35 years at UWM and will never have a layoff because we're a family company focused on what's best for our people. That's big shit for a billionaire to talk to another billionaire, bro. Yeah. That's how you know he don't fuck with because it's usually, you know, the billionaire club where you don't speak badly about other billionaires publicly and he lit his ass up with that.

But yeah, good friend. He seems like, you know, he runs shit, you know, the right way. Do we have any insight on if his mortgage company is predatory, though? Do we have that info? I mean, I think everyone is. Every mortgage company is, right? Any mortgage company, yeah,

yes, I mean, I don't think, just don't think, especially you say they're the biggest mortgage company. Now, I don't think that they're Wells Fargo. I don't see him out here being cited as intentionally, you know, being as evil as possible. But yeah, I would not assume that a guy who runs a mortgage company that's the biggest

whole, like their name is wholesale mortgage lending, which if you've ever gone through the mortgage process, it's not a wholesale process. Shout out to big lots, nigga. But I haven't seen once I left St. Louis. I miss big lots. But did you see the tweet that went kind of viral that I'm talking about the actual work experience there?

Like they were talking about how it was like he was basically a slave driver. You feel me? How he's, you know, how he works the shit out of his employees. But I don't know. Yeah. That's the one I saw. I didn't see this one. Well, they went from when he got there, they had 12 employees and they now have however many tens of thousands of employees and are worth however many billion dollars.

And I'm guessing that that did not happen by everyone chilling. I'm guessing that happened by him being an asshole. But I am enjoying the rivalry between him and Dan Gilbert. And I am prepared to believe that a very bad person is still a better person than Dan Gilbert. Yes. It's a sliding scale here. It's like the Celsius Fahrenheit shit. Yeah, Maddish viz 10 degrees Celsius and fucking Dan Gilbert is Montana right now, you know?

Fucking neither of them are great. I sent you all a couple clips of the World Cup celebration in Argentina. Did you see any of that shit, man? That shit was amazing. Unreal. There is nothing like that. That's what I was going to say. There is nothing that this whole nation will agree.

Hey, this good thing happened and let's be happy about it. There is nothing. Not a single thing that our country will unite about the way that, you know, these soccer craze countries unite about soccer. Well, I've been scared to be in the middle of that motherfucker, man. That was so many people was frightening to look at. You know what I'm saying? Like, dog, it was beautiful to see. You know what I mean?

But damn, it's a lot of people, you know what I mean? Amped the fuck up. Did you see they had to shut it down? They had to shut the parade down because they could. I mean, there's just no way to have security for five million people on the streets of your city. People were jumping off of freeway overpasses to try and land on one of the team buses that had an open double-decker top. What the fuck? Did anybody die doing that?

And some of them missed the bus. Yeah. I don't know that they died, but there were people who were like very seriously injured and a couple people who successfully got on the bus, by the way. That's got to be awkward as fuck. I'm going to fucking just blast that like Batman on your shit. Like, bro. I think you just passed my beard, dog. Yeah, you got to open a message at that moment.

If they're willing to risk that, hey, here, here's a beer, man. Enjoy yourself. Shit. They also had a clip of Messi pulling up to his compound after the parade was over. I mean, there's probably 10,000 people on the street outside of Messi's house just singing the champion of the world over and over. It's just like, what the fuck, dog? I don't believe it. There's no one like on the planet, bro.

No one like them. Yeah. I can't imagine. Did you see the clips of Salt Bay at the celebration on the field? Yeah, looking dusty as fuck trying to take the trophies from them boys. Like, sit your weak ass day. Go back to sprinkling them Tomahawk steaks, bro.

God damn, you 2018 ass motherfucker. Take no ass back to Vegas, fuck, nigger. Hell no. Get your weak ass out of here, man. Get the fuck out of here. All right. We have one other sports adjacent story, which is the story that broke earlier.

this week. And I'm going to be as wrong as possible on this for the sake of comedy. But I tell you all the info about Chief Seaholic on Twitter, the chief super fan who got arrested for bank robbery, yes. Yeah. Was it confirmed it was a bank robbery? Because the shit just said like armed robbery. No, he was, he robbed a bank. And I believe He was the wolf man in that footage. He was not the wolf man.

I do, I will say, I don't think it was true. That's a different wolf, Bubba. Yeah. I don't think it was true that he He was robbing Banks in his Chiefsaholic wolf costume. But the way this unfolded, and this is why some of us choose to play our emotional cards pretty close to the vest on Twitter, this dude, Chief Seholic, well-known Chief Superfan, goes to all their big fundraisers, has pictures with Patrick Mahomes, all this shit, because he was donating big money to the Chief Foundation. So, you know, get a ticket to the VIP dinners and shit like that. So he said, okay, I'm going to drive to the game. I want to say it was a Bronc, whoever they played last week. Jackson will chime in on that, I'm sure, in a second.

But he didn't show up to the game. And so Chief's Twitter was like, oh, fuck, like what happened to Chiefsaholic? Like, he didn't check in from the game. You know, he didn't tell anyone, like, where he was going to be. They were, like, trying to figure out, okay, like, what's his real name so we can call the police to do a wellness check? And it turned out that the reason he did not get to the game is that he got her. The police had the wellness. They've got that under wraps.

I can assure you that he's well taken care of. And the police saw to that themselves. You do not have to worry about a wellness check on that one, Bobba. But apparently this was the routine was like, where are the chiefs going? And if a game was drivable, he would drive to the game and just knock off a bank on the way to or from the game. Road game at the Texans. Excuse me. Thank you, Jackson.

I mean, what an incredible, look, whatever your family traditions are, who am I mean to judge? But knocking off a bank as part of an NFL road trip, that's the thing you've done multiple times. It's truly extraordinary. This, knocking off the banks to be a sport fan. And yeah, and Nicholas Cage is the only one who could play this guy. Has to. It has to be Nicholas Cage, bro. Has to, bro.

Put his face back together to allow him to be in the fucking show. lift them jowls up let's make that shit work you feel him and lift them chowels up and in a true there's still more space dust on this book moment

people were in an attempt to be funny obviously someone had Googled bank robbery in a wolf mask and then tweeted that and was like oh he was robbing people in the wolf mask but the photo that that did come from was taken at a bank robbery in Indianapolis of course

A couple days before the Chiefs played the Colts in Indianapolis. So it could have been Chief Seaholic. It's not confirmed that it was not him. I just throw that up. That man. Go ahead. Go ahead. I was going to say, that man threw his life away to watch Kyle Allen quarterback, bro.

Like, dog, it's so many better things. You would catch a 20-year bid for him than this. I promise you, bro. Gotta take a picture with my homes. That's all he wanted. You know what I mean? Robin Banks to do that shit. That's crazy as hell.

He loved it. was a chiefs a hodlock like a motherfucker he's so loved that team risk his all his freedom off the strength of that that's crazy you know normally that's a good point bro and we have people in my family including my dad who passed away after long struggles with alcoholism so like the whole ahollic thing is always slightly annoyed me you know what i mean it's like you're not addicted to chocolate tiffany you know what i mean this motherfucker was addicted to the cheques to chief football bro whatever he took to get to the game he even he had to the rob a goddamn bank on the way to make it happen.

Sheesh. That's also one of my favorite Simpsons jokes. You know, like people put a hollick on the end of words, but a haul is just the second half of the word alcohol. It's the I see is what implies that you're addicted to something. You know what I mean? So when Homer Simpson said, I'm a chockaholic. I'm addicted to chaka-hawall.

He was addicted to chiefs a haul, though. He was, bro. You can't say. he wasn't. She's the hole. It's running to do his face. Oh, shit. Okay.

All right. Let's talk about John. Give us that little Yadi quote you just, you just came to us, bro. Little Yadi said he's had too much, much sex, so he stopped having sex. He stopped fucking because he's had too much sex in his life. And, gee, the man's probably has enough sex.

Like, on average. average, right? Like, being a young dude, popping as much money as he has, probably as much sex as an average, what, 60 year old? I imagine if I was 25 and had sex like a 60 year old, I'd be pretty tired of it, too. I get it, bro. I get it, man. Like, how many ways he's going to do this exact same thing? You know what I mean? And to me, I'm going to be honest with you. I mean, I still love it. You feel me? But the thing is, like, it's not the same as it was. when it was 18 or 16 when it was brand new, you feel me? So over time, it's just a thing you do. You know what I mean? It's not like bro, guess what I had sex last night, deed. You know what I mean? Like, that's gone. So, bro, dude. What'd you do last night, bro? No, I didn't see the new Avatar movie, dude. I was a little busy having

X-E-X. Having sex, bro. You ever heard of dude. You still a virgin deed? Bro. My fuckers was 18, 19. Ain't poke nothing yet, bro. Get your dick wet, dude. What are you doing?

That was so wild. We were really. You dried dick some bitch. Teenagers would really get clown for not having sex, bro. It was wild. It's cut in season, bro. Find somebody to lay up with, dude. Remember when it was a big deal?

Like, oh, shit, I might get out. You know what I mean? Now it's just happens. You know what I mean? It's breakfast. You know what I mean? Just burn your calories. You said, I had to them.

You know what I'm saying? Like I relate to, I understand the sentiment at the age that I am. It's difficult. I literally just can't put myself in the mindset at 25 of feeling that. way. And obviously he lived a very different life than I did. But I just cannot picture at 25 being like, I'm good. Like maybe, maybe for like a day, like, you know what I mean? For like a couple days. He was 15, 16. Was he 16? He might have been 16 when he blew up. So the man might not even be 25. It's a long 10 years. Long 10 years. He's 25. I looked at it. Yeah. Traveling, traveling the

world. You know what I mean? Poking everything moving. You feel me? He's seen a lot. He's seen a lot. Way more than I have in my 40 years. You know what I mean? Yeah, of course. I just feel like it's like the like the 25 year old is I'm never drinking again. You know what I mean? It's like you're tired of drinking this weekend. I don't know, man. Like I just, I just, I just imagine he's seen a lot way more than I'll ever see. I remember little bow while saying it like 22. He wished he didn't see so much so young. Because he's, he's seen everything. And I remember them asking him a question.

It was like, 106 to Park. So they just asked him regular questions. Like, it's just a chill-ass question. And I'm like, and he said, I think, you said, if I could change anything, I wouldn't have seen so much so early. You know what I'm saying? Like, he's like, what do I do next?

Like, I've done everything on this planet. And I was like, and it, and for me, it was like existential. Like, holy shit. You know what I mean? Like, that was a deep-ass answer. It's for 106 and Park in 4.30 p.m. You know what I mean? I'm like, nigga.

I ain't supposed to be thinking about all this shit. I felt bad for that rich-ass dude, you know what I'm saying, at that point. Maybe the most popular person on the planet. I mean, well, like, you know what I'm saying? One of the most popular people on the planet at that time. Wise words from Bowerd-Ward. This is before fresh. This is before fresh as I mean, his dropped.

This is before the downfall. You know what I mean? Fresh as I mean. Well, it's huge, though, bro. Like, he was huge. He's seen everything. And so I feel like, you know, man's just 25. you know what I mean

poking and pride and all over the place you know what I mean it's just it's time for something what is what else for me to do like you know what I mean

all right unless an extraterrestrial drop he's seen it all you know what I mean he's seen it all let's talk about I'm dreaming of a white vernacular

Christmas TikTok user comrade ebony warrior tweeted Comrade Ebony Warrior Jesus Christ tweeted the or excuse me

TikTok the video of him talking about classic white person vernacular ranging from that's rich coming from you to okay no more Mr. Nice guy I said this in the group chat

can you imagine the first nigga that said no more Mr. Nice guy I know shit got real. Bro. Can you, like, bro, this had to be what? 1880. You know what I'm saying?

He probably grabbed a musket when he did that motherfucker. Started stuffing gumpowder like no more Mr. Nice guy, nigga. You know what I'm saying? I mean, when I think about that, I get my skin, you know what I mean? My hair stand up on my arms. You know what I mean? That probably was crazy back then.

I think that was a, hey, bro, we need to bring that back, bro. We need to bring the fierceness of no more Mr. Nice guy back. we've also got uh you're barking up the wrong tree and now listen to here pal now listen to hear pal name name all of i want to hear all of them and so the purpose of his tic-tok is i don't know why white people appropriate uh how black people talk because there's so many underused white vernacular uh phrases so that's rich coming from you okay no more mr white no more mr white guy that's a bar

I'll fuck with it let's skedaddle let's skeddattle is great we need to run that back him skedaddle is a great word that is underused skeddattle

let me be frank that's what he now listen here, bow I love it this fun Cup of Joe nah

it's whatever mid it's weird no emotions there you're barking up the wrong tree that's hilarious though if you envision a dog

barking up a wrong tree like bro the squirrel you're looking for it isn't there right dumbass so bark up the wrong tree does that mean like you're wrong or is it mean you got me fucked up it means you got me fucked up

okay okay okay yeah I wouldn't say I wouldn't say it has the this could go to violence connotation that you got me fucking It's not as visceral. You know what I mean? Yeah.

But it is, you got me fucked up. How you like them apples? I never, I think that's just straight up from Goodwill Hunting. I don't think that was ever actually a white person. I think, I think, I think y'all said that. I don't know, obviously. But it feels, it feels like it was said. You know, you're Italian, you know what I mean?

So your ancestors probably didn't say that. It just seems like, I think it was like, if it was a regular, phrase, I don't think they would have used it in that way for Goodwill. Because it's from Goodwell hunting, right? You don't think Teddy Roosevelt said that shit? No. I think he probably hit them apples. I think he told someone they were barking up the wrong tree, but I don't see quote how you like them apples. That's not a... How you like them apples. I can see Nixon saying some shit like that. Okay. Nixon first for sure how you like the apples. I can see Clinton saying that shit like, you know what I'm saying? Sarcastic. I can see Clinton saying. I can see Clint's saying.

Clinton saying some shit like that. That's, I mean, that's a recent, you know, more recent. The last one is an absolute classic of the white vernacular. Newsflash, buddy. That's great. More of that, please. More of that. News flash, man.

Newsflash, Bubbas. I want, I need that. I have been advocating for white men to start saying she's got an ass that just won't quit. I want that back. We are in the golden age of ass right now. Asses are assing that have never asked before. We could get a lot of my. knowledge with that.

But the white man saying it. What, like, what? Yeah. Back then when it was saying, that might be a Celsius Fahrenheit discrepancy on the ass too.

But we need to start at the back. Like, where are we starting? You know, where does it in? Where does it begin? You know what I mean? Yeah, my suggestion actually here is that black people appropriate more of the white vernacular.

You know what I mean? Like John telling someone no more Mr. Nice guy? Come on. I will hit somebody with that shit. I went in somebody No more Mr. fucking nice guy

I gotta drop a fucking in there No more Mr. Nice guy motherfucker You know what I mean That ain't That got a little That got a little

Something in that got a little Tung in that thing You got a little You know what I'm saying You know what I'm saying? I know You can fill it in your jaw You know

You can fill it in your jaw A little bit Yeah I'm fucking with I might have to tap it Hell yeah That's a couple of Skidato is fun though Skiddle is extremely on these

I know I know bootleakers got so much run out of skedaddle bro Right Skaddle Like let's get The coppers

Hell yeah Or Or a nigga was trying You better Skidado Because no more Mr. Nice guy

motherfucker For real Brough Skiddle is great I say like I'm a shake You know I mean

You know what I'm saying Or beat it I told the nigga A beat it once That's my The best thing Ever did about You told so

I was on the Oh, man. And he was notoriously annoying. And I'm on the phone. I'm having some business. He keeps asking me questions. Yo, beat it. Beat it.

You know what I'm saying? Kick rocks, nigga. You know what I'm saying? Like, bro, he earned it, though. He just... Make like a banana and split. Need more of that. Need more of that, too.

Y'all got some bangers low-key, bro. If you would just say him sarcastically, they'd hit every time, bro. If you looked at Sean in the face hit, y'all ready to go let's skedaddle bro that ain't going to hit look her

dead in her eyes talk to her soul let's skeddattle bro I'm hitting around with that tomorrow dog I'll do that I'll try that tonight and report back

keep us posted bro um the three he did there is he's missing a big piece of the white

vernacular though which is the Delophosaurus frill that white people shake before they start spitting litigiousness is Buddy, uh, pal or my guy. If you hear any of those three things from a, from an annoyed white man,

turn around and walk away before you get served with a fucking summons. You know what I mean? The cops are already on the way, bro. I'm dialing nine and one and then I'm saying news flash buddy and then I'm dialing one again. My guy. That's not fun. No.

But I do like people to say buddy, though, when they're like, you know, referring to buddy over there. You know what I'm saying? All right, buddy. Listen. No, no. I'm talking about like, you know what I'm saying?

Oh, just generally. Buddy got crossed the fuck up. Yes. You know what I'm saying? Like, I fuck, yeah. And that's in that way. I fuck with that. Buddy, buddy's used in cool ways.

Niggas are. magical. Another, yeah, I was right. White people, white people don't use buddy in that way. Another one is, uh, okay, buddy, here's what's going to happen. Here's what's going to happen. Love it. Here's what's going to happen.

I, but he was not on the list. I actually think that's still in the white person vernacular. Do you believe here's what's going to happen though? I think if somebody said, here's what going to happen. I'm going to believe that's going to happen that way. Yeah. You know what I mean? I'm, I don't think that's, that ain't cat, nigga.

Yeah. Man, Dan's serious. that's what's going to happen. If you know what's telling you, this is what's going to happen. You know what I mean? You're going to get in your fucking car. You're going to skedaddle.

Yeah. You're going to fucking skedaddle, bro. Okay. He's no more Mr. Motherfucking nice guy, do you? I love that. Newsflash, buddy.

You're barking up the wrong tree. All right. Well, we've got some good phrases for my part in the And now my white whale Jenkins and Jones episode is an episode where you guys do your white guy voices for the entire episode. So we've got some stock phrases now for if that. So annoying.

So annoying. The worst hour. Oh, ever. The worst hour ever. You'd both be so tired. You'd both be so exhausted by me. You guys would be the Jimmy Butler meme after that episode. I was sleep for three days, bro.

The summoning. job so I didn't have to do the white guy voice. That's why I left St. Louis and came out to work differently so I didn't have to use that white man voice. Jesus Christ. I wanted to say nigger it works so bad. I changed my entire life. All right. Can we talk about the horny ice cream tweet? The horny ice cream tweet. Oh, that's yeah. Yeah. I sent you guys the tweet that Josh Gondelman posted. We don't do free ads.

I'm not going to say the name of the very hipstery ice cream brand. I heart is good. I heart is good. A heart is good ice cream, though. I'm sure it is. But there's not really such a thing as... It's a sidecar donuts of ice cream, though, right?

That's not really such a bad thing as ice cream. I am a, I am a, I am bougie for ice cream. I like the high cream content, like Hagenas and up for me. You know what I mean? So I would probably revive this ice cream. You don't fuck with Eadis? Double, double. I will eat any ice cream.

Okay. But it was like the dessert that I ate so much for so long that I definitely am a microbreu ice cream person. Dude. I just double whipped. I've never forgot that from their commercials. Bro. And it's definitely softened ice cream. I'm a hog and dyes motherfucker too, except when it comes to cookies and cream.

Briars has the best cookies and cream, bro. Oh, facts. Totally agree. I don't fuck with Tuttle tracks and all that shit. I don't usually go for the, like, super extra ingrediented up. You know what I mean? Just like a chocolate chip is good.

You know what I mean for me? Maybe some cookie dough chunks. I like turtles tracks. I like Moose Tracks. I'm a big fan. I believe that you're a Moose Tracks guy. No, Moose Tracks is fired. They got the Reese's in there, right?

That's Moose Tracks? Wait a minute. Hold up. Yeah, nigga. Yeah, Nickle. News Flash, buddy. News Flash, buddy. I'll give you look.

If you don't regularly get these, I'll give you three of my go-toes that are slightly off the beaten path because I will just fuck up some Hagenas chocolate chocolate or chocolate chip. Three slightly off the beaten path. The Baskin-Robbins peanut butter and chocolate is like a legitimate peanut butter fucking swirl through that thing. I've heard it's tremendous when you're fucking high. That's not my experience

of it obviously. But the Hagenas chocolate chip cookie dough is the best cookie dough in the pre-packaged ice creams for my money. Even better than Ben and Jerry's cookie dough. Yes. For me. Ben and Jerry took it, though. It's, who.

But Ben and Jerry's you'll sometimes get where it's a little over-frozen and it's a little bit hard. You know what I mean? That depends on what store you're going to, though. Like how, you know what I'm saying? Correct. And I'm talking about the prepackage. I'm not talking about Live Scoop.

All right. It's a different, totally different product. And I will fuck up the Ben and Jerry's mint chocolate chunk with the full-on, like chunks of chocolate they have in that shit. Oh, my God. You are chocolate-ass ice cream. I don't really fuck with chocolate ice cream like that. I'm be honest with you.

I'm a, have y'all been to salt straw? You're laying some very bougie ice cream places. Oh man, but that shit good, dog. That shit had me put that shit in my veins, bro. You know, they had like... Salt straw is good. Yeah, yeah.

The reason John brought up sidecar donuts is there's a place by buckets that was like, it's like a fancy L.A. Donut place. And I like donuts from the Cambodian homies. I do not like the gentrified donut. I go to Randi's. I go to Randys.

I go to Randys. I go to Randys. I don't go out of sidecar, sidecars, whatever, you know what I mean? But Salt and Straw, if that's boozy, goddammit, then I'm boozy. Gentrified ice cream works for me, bro. I'll take the gentrified ice cream for sure. I see it crazy, man. I mean, if that's considered live scoop, right, what you said?

What you referred to earlier? I've never heard that time before. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If someone, if someone was just my term for the science that I have made up of ice cream. It's not a real term. I'm going to use it, though. I'm going to use it, yeah, for sure. Yeah, I'm going to take that.

We'll blow that up. You feel me? Yeah, for sure. Do you guys have any other ones you get at the store? I'm just trying to give people. People need something to do, bro. Well, I guess it's 70 degrees. Negative 70.

They're not getting ice cream. But people need shit to do for the next. I mean, I'll eat ice cream in the winter, bro. I'll be, I'll eat ice cream. I don't, bro. I'm smacking that shit. I don't get a lot. Did you guys see?

I was so obnoxious on Twitter about this a couple years ago. You saw that Long Beach is the number one ice cream consuming city in the country by like double the per capital. Based on how much ice cream you eat? Because I remember there's a time. Per person. That makes sense because you always, you talk about ice cream all the time. I had gone years without eating ice cream.

I was not a big ice cream guy. I'll be honest with you. Like, I never thought to get ice cream on shit. And I would actually pass on it if it was like serve with like my, my dessert or whatever. I just would let whoever I was with eat that shit. You know what I mean? And I'd eat the dessert. But salt and straw kind of switched me up where like there's ice cream I can eat that don't blow my shit up.

You know what I mean? Because I had stopped reading. The high end stuff. It's the higher end stuff. No, but it's the higher end stuff. Yeah, because I remember like, so I was like 28 when I went to a coldstone. And by the time I dropped the container in the trash,

I mean, when it touched the trash, I was like, oh, like, I don't have time to make it home. I'm going to have to go to war in this toilet real quick. Yeah. I'll catch y'all at the metro. It's going to be a wild bubble. You know what I mean? So, yeah, so I'm a, I'm a demon at the day.

I'm a demon at cold. I'm a demon at Coldstone. You say what? A demon. You fuck with... Kohlson doesn't fuck your stomach up? Ice cream for whatever reason I'm kind of cool with, but let me give you... Y'all know I had those issues with the cholesterol and all that shit.

This was... When those results came back, this was a conversation with the doctor. So you don't drink at all. I was like, nope, I don't drink at all. She's like, you don't smoke? I was like, no. She was like, you smoke cigarettes? I was like, I don't smoke anything.

She's like, okay. What's your diet like? I was like, it's okay. Like, I eat sandwiches and stuff. And, like, then she literally just started naming foods because she's like, the cholesterol is coming from somewhere, bro. Right, right, right, right. And finally she got to ice cream and I just stopped.

I was like, oh. And she was like, how much ice cream do you eat? And I was like, I eat a fair amount of ice cream. How much ice cream did you eat? How much did you eat? She was like, how much? So you know the little pints that you buy? I don't remember if it's pints are quartz because the-

Yeah, yeah. It's probably a pint. I don't think you mind a quart. The regular one. A fourth of a gallon, right? According to college, I would eat. Like when we first started making a little bit of money, I would probably eat four or five of those a week. God damn.

Yeah. I would have one of those. I would have one of those. If we sat down to watch a football game together, Char and I on a Sunday night after we'd like had burgers or whatever, I would for sure eat one of those. Nigger, you're an ice creamaholic. Yeah. A cream a holic. You eat a whole pints in one sitting too.

Oh, consistently. Yeah. Four, five a week. Yeah. Bro, you kept places in business. That is crazy. When the thing came out about how much more ice cream long beach eats than anywhere else, I was like, I've got at least 5% of this. You're the reason.

Bro, so how much were they eating? What was it, what was the per person, um, uh, ice cream? I don't remember what the measurements were. but it was just the graph was hilarious because it was like, it was like ludicrous how much higher Long Beach was and everywhere else. But the more I thought about it,

the more it made sense because it's sunny in Long Beach like 345 days a year. And it's never really, like right now we're going through the coldest winter that we've had in quite some time and it's going to be 68 degrees today. You know what I mean? So you can really always go to a store

and get ice cream. And it would not be a ridiculous decision. Yeah. But I'm like you, like I'll eat ice cream in the rain or when it's cold, whatever. I've never lived in negative 70.

I don't think if it was negative 70 I would be eating ice cream. I would add, by the way, just for the people who might be because of, I don't eat ice cream like that anymore. You'd be eating, okay. And that mic would have been eating ice cream negative 70. Yeah, probably so. Yeah. Five pints a week? A week?

That is insane. Bro. Sure. Yeah. Absolutely. But that was my like, that was my, that was my, that was my like, oh, I could buy my own groceries now shit you know what I mean everyone has their like

their stretch when they're like okay they're out there I live with my mom through college so when I was like 22 23 I was like I could just go buy all the ice cream I'm like oh right I bought sneakers that I couldn't afford every so often you pay more in ice cream than I'd pay in them sneakers

every six weeks those points of ice cream over over six weeks definitely add it up there you come on no doubt I'm not here listen I'm not So, oh, the whole purpose of this was I was bringing up the fucking gondelman tweet. That's hilarious. Anyway, he had a picture of one of the gentrified ice cream brands.

He took the lid off and the plastic covering over the ice cream says, good job, hands. Now it's mouth's turn. Jesus. Oh, man. I would be taking a back if I saw that. You just get blinds out of motherfucker with some shit like that. You think you're about to dig it in some cookies and cream and you getting hit with sexual you into. Like, God, damn.

I also facts. Yeah, but also I'll keep going. Now it's mouth, sir. All right. Let's not play it. Bro. I want people on here. I want people to listen.

Hit us if you know anybody that's eating more ice cream to Mike. I couldn't imagine there's anybody that out there that's eating more ice cream. Five pints a week. That's crazy. Let me share a story that my friends will be very. happy I'm telling on this podcast. One of my best friends in the world is a guy named Connor. I officiated

his wedding. He was in our college newspaper everything, right? He and his girlfriend were living together in New York. Char and I would go stay with them for like a week every year. New York has great fucking gentrified ice cream places. We would for sure go get dessert. Basically every night. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Connor was hanging out with his girlfriend, now wife, they got a kid together and they're now back in Southern California and everything. but I came up somehow. She brought me up somehow. And Connor said his response was, and I quote,

fucking Mike, I bet he's eating ice cream right now. So he texted me and was like, when was the last time that you ate ice cream? And I took, I immediately sent him a selfie of myself in the drive-thru line at Wendy's to get a chocolate frosty.

now that's your last time I had ice cream now yeah he brings that up uh he brings that up he brings that up almost every time I see him um all right uh yeah anyway as previously mentioned I'm pretty horny for ice cream but that label is too horny for me you know what I mean that's it's it's a bridge too far bro not on the first link you know you got that that got to be like like would you see off after like the third or fourth pipe you off you know you see Take some time with me here. Get to know me a little bit. Right, right.

Yeah, make me work for it a little bit. Gentrified ice cream. You know? Yeah. Now it's mouse turn. Shee. All right. All right.

It is, this is our last episode before the holidays. So I want to know, and I know the answer to this question for John. So maybe he can go first. What are your favorite corny holiday tradition? whether it's with your family or yourself. John has a... Oh, yeah, just started it. First year.

Yes. So lay it on us, Papa Nichols. All right, man. I'm leaning all the way into this dad's shit. You know what I mean? And I really want to take the lame... I'm all the lame shit I want all of it. You feel me?

And so, you know, we're taking family picks every year and matching shit. You feel me? Like matching Christmas. Ugly sweat. Went to the photo studio. At J.C. Pennies, bro. Horrible. You were at Petty specifically? We went to Pennies, bro.

We thrown it back. I ain't been into JC Pennies in probably 15 years, you feel me? So, like, I pulled it up. Yeah, we pulled up. It was great experience. I mean, great experience as far as the photos. The store. Wow.

Wow. How the Mighty have fallen. Call it Mighty. Jesus. Clearance, clearance, everything. Every retail store. Every retail store looks like a big lot's now. Painful, painful to the eyes.

Internet shopping, killing that shit, bro. Yeah, the photographer, I think that was Latasha. She really helped us out. I appreciate you, Latasha, man. You know what I'm saying? All right, so that's yours? Yeah, that's my. Family pictures, yeah.

It was funny because somebody said, how hard was your wife, how hard was it for your wife to convince you to do this? I'm like, it was my idea. It was your idea, yeah. That person didn't know you. I bought them. I looked for the sweaters.

I took my dry ass, the old Navy and copped them up. That person didn't know you and they didn't know rabbi. At all. She's by far the cooler person in this group between the two of us. I lean all the way into the square shit. Mine would probably be every Christmas Eve, Char goes to church with her family. They go to like a late night service or whatever. And, you know, we got the kids down.

And so I wrap presents by myself while watching die hard. and it's the most stereotypical and enjoyable evening. That's fire. The house is completely quiet, except for Bruce Willis shooting people, and I'm wrapping up presents for my kids. And that's my favorite adult corny holiday tradition, for sure. For sure. I don't even really have any traditions except, like, for Christmas dinner, you know,

I cook shit. Like, I'm kind of like the grill guy in the family now. So, you know, that's something I look forward to. Like, I'll do shoulders or ribs or whatever have you. So, you know, that's a little something I like. I'm not really big into Christmas, though. I mean, I'm not like a, like a fucking grinch-ass motherfucker, but, you know, Christmas is like, eh, it's cool, you know? Yeah.

I get that. I get that. I get that. It's kind of like sex. You've had 40 of them. Fuck it. You know what I mean? Like, you know what I mean?

I think, I think so me has made me lean in more, you know, because like, you get to see, kind of see shit from like your, her through her eyes, you know, the excitement. So that's made me. You're going to shit yourself at how exactly. excited she is to open presence. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So you're going to shit yourself at the faces she makes opening presents. Everything that like, like everything she learns new.

It's like I transfer back into when I, you know what I'm saying? And it makes me feel things that I forgot. You know what I'm saying? Ever. I have ever felt. You know what I mean? And she's only one. So she's like, oh, oh shit, that is new.

You know what I mean? Like I remember like, so it's. I don't know, man. It's interesting. But yeah, that brought some more fun at Christmas form because I was definitely like Utah. I was like, man, all right, man. It is what it is. You know what I'm saying?

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Restrictions apply. See terms at sportsbook. Fandul.com. Gambling problem, call 1-800 gambler or visit fandul.com slash R.G. All right, this is our last episode before Christmas, and we have a heartwarming message that we want to to share. I don't know how much of this you want to read John, but our guy, Zach,

who's a long-time listener of the pod, has some good news. We thought would make sense to share with y'all right now. So this is from Zach. Should I say his actual Twitter name? He did put his Twitter name on there. Okay. So my name is Zach Trottwood Zeus on Twitter and IG.

I've been a fan from the jump and even had a couple reader emails on some early episodes. He was tapping in early. Remember we sent him? We need to do that again. Send those questions out. I think that's how I got on the pod was I would just, I responded to every time you had a fucking prompt, I was like, let me get something funny in there. Maybe you'll be the fourth member. Hit us with the email.

I'm tapping in with y'all because I just recently got engaged over the Thanksgiving weekend to my lady. A big part of our early relationship is due to the pod. I don't know if y'all remember, but my lady shouted me out on an episode. Don't judge a booty bite's cover. I used to love them episode days, man. I used to get real creative. You know what I'm saying? As a surprise Christmas gift since y'all are my favorite part to listen to, that was one of the first instances in which I felt like we could be serious in a relationship.

Prior to that, I didn't think it was possible since I was a single dad with two young daughters and I just didn't have time to manage anything else. Fast forward four years later, I'm a whole fiancé, bro. Crazy. Congratulations. Crazy. My five and six-year-old daughters helped plan the proposal and were right next to me when I popped the question, was she accepted? Man, congratulations to everybody involved. I couldn't ask for a better partner.

She loves me for me and accepts my babies like that were her own. A big part of that is due to the pod. I'm not sure if y'all still check y'all's email, but I wanted to give y'all y'all's flowers while I can keep doing great work. It's been amazing to watch y'all come up in real time, and I can't wait to see what y'all do moving forward. Man, appreciate y'all. Your wife is beautiful.

The ring is beautiful too. Balled out. You did your thing, homie. Congratulations to you and your beautiful young girls too, man. For sure. Trout Woods, Zoo, tap in with them, man. Appreciate you hitting this up, man.

I always feels great. Can't believe when people hit us with these matches. It always shocks the shit out of me when we get this type of love, man. So thank you, thank you, thank you, man. Merry Christmas, happy, New Year, all of that. You feel me? Yeah, for sure. Congrats to the homie, Zach, and your lovely fiancee and the new family that y'all are making.

Love to see it. Appreciate the support over the years. It's like, like you said, I just can't ever wrap my head around how this ridiculous-ass podcast has, like, played influential parts in certain people's lives. Like he was like, when my question got red on, don't judge a booty by its cover. I knew it was real. Don't judge a booty by its cover.

It's all ridiculous. It's all so absurd and ridiculous. And I'm so appreciative of it all, man. I really, really appreciate the listeners we have. I really fuck with y'all, man. Real shit. That's the best story. Zach, please make sure someone tells the story at the wedding.

It's got to be in a toast And the name of the episode title Also has to be in the toast Repeated to Yes I said Don't judge a booty by its cover That's a wisdom too Oh man

That's a fact though That is a gym Hell yeah We mean it when we say it Don't just a booty by its cover Exactly That's a great point Congrats to his fiance

Congrats to the beautiful baby girls Sounds like it's gonna be a wonderful family And you know A couple years Maybe they'll be able to listen to the pot on the car with the girls in there. I don't know. All booties be booty in a little while.

All booties be bootying. All right. That's it, man. Merry Christmas. Happy holidays. Happy New Year. We're not going to see y'all until January 2nd like we said at the top.

So let me be the first to say on December 22nd. No. Don't see you next year. No. See you next year. Skiddle. That's see you next year.

That's see you next year. A white vernacular that needs to die, bro. Newsflash, buddy. We'll see you next year. Can't wait to say that shit to you too, man. All right, y'all. Love y'all. Bye.

Bye.