The Johnny Salami Podcast - Sammy Caron

Episode Date: October 24, 2020

Sammy Caron is a legendary old friend of mine who I grew up with. We used to play football together, and party hard.

So, what's going on everyone? Welcome to a new episode of the Johnny Salami Podcast. Today's guest, Sammy Caron, man. Thanks for coming. Hey, no problem. Thank you, John. Thanks for having me, man. Like we said, I haven't seen you in probably like a decade. Yeah, pretty close to it, but it doesn't look like you've changed much, so, you know, that's good. Try not, you know. It's always scary, man, when you haven't seen someone in a while. You never know how it's going to be.

How weird it might be if you're not, like, vibing right away. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, we were vibing back to the day, so what the hell changed? Yeah, we were crushing it, man. Yeah. Yeah. But what's been going on? Has anything legendary happened, or are you just still a legend in the making?

I think I'm a legend in the making, maybe, I guess. When I think about you, I think a lot about those beach parties you used to have, man. Those were so much fun. Oh, shoot. Yeah. The beach parties. That's, yeah. Best night you don't remember right one of those things one of those things that was a hassle and a half though by the last one

oh shit yeah man that's like an example of like how people change drinking yeah every year you'd be like what happened man you couldn't take it just a little bit easier like it got fucking yeah the level just kept going higher it was insane yeah it started off with like fireworks and then people just started throwing like frags and there was a frag in there my buddy billy got hit with one i remember uh we were setting off those fireworks because i did the whole display yeah and i actually had uh matt laz we went up to new hampshire because i wasn't even 21 yet oh yeah and so we had matt laz and i shipped up there we had a day of it we were drinking and driving hey you know back in the day that was cool but yeah we bought

like i think it was like 300 worth of fireworks that year because i was ready it's like my grad party you know you gotta go off and uh so when i was setting them all off there was one that kind of like backfired didn't go off so i was like ah fuck it, ah, fuck it, whatever. Hey, throw light to the next one. Light to the next one. So he just kept setting them off. And in the morning, some douchebag, I don't even know who it was, started throwing all the empty boxes of the fireworks that were already shot off. And, yeah, one wasn't shot off.

So it's me, I think it was me, Mikey, and Billy sitting just smoking a bowl on the side of the fire. And they were just trying to keep the fire going because it was morning time and no more wood left. So you got to improvise, right? So they start throwing the fireworks. I'm like, see, I see the one that hasn't gone off yet. I was like, aiming right at us. I'm like, oh, boys, that's going off. Me and Mikey jump into the ditch on the side.

You know how there was water in the ditch on the side over there when we all camped out and really had no idea because he was hitting the bowl at the time so it goes right at him hits him in the leg it explodes he had a welt like this big on his leg what was his reaction his reaction he went down with us into the ditch after he got hit we were just like holy shit. Dude, I got hit with one. Luckily, I don't think it was that big. I remember you were lighting them off. And I don't think you were there at the time. Yep.

I think you left and everyone was like, all right, let's wait until he gets back to light some off. And somebody who was like wicked cocky was like, no, no, I got this. I know what I'm doing, right? One of those guys. So I went over to watch, you know.

Oh, boy. Somebody lit one off, and I could see it, like, tipping over as it was lighting. Oh, boy. Dude, took it right off the chest and didn't even feel a thing. Yeah. Like. Did not feel one thing. Went off the chest.

You didn't even feel that. Oh, dude, everyone was cheering me on. Yeah. They were like, fuck, yeah. Were you running around after that? Nobody cared about how I felt. They were just like, fuck yeah. Dude, everybody was lit.

Yeah, everybody was lit. They were like, light another one. Yeah, John, your turn. Go light this thing. Yeah, but dude, Evo actually threw sparklers into the fire when everyone was around it. And he thought that was funny. It was hilarious. It was.

Everybody like backed up 20 feet. I hit a few people in the eyes. I think a few people started crying. Get out of here. It was hilarious. Yeah, that was pretty funny. A huge hazard, man. From what I remember, yeah.

Oh, there was no rules. Those nights, no rules. Yeah, it could have been definitely a good commercial of like what not to do at the age. For fireworks? Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, man, some crazy things happened. How would that commercial go? Give me a little something on that.

I think it would be like, what is it, Above the Influence? Okay. With the arrow. All these kids are just blacked out running around with fireworks. Live above the influence. You know, my favorite, not my favorite party, but one of my favorite ones was, I think, like, Mitch had a grad party. Oh, yes. Yes, the grad party at Mitch's house.

Yeah, he always had the best parties. Yeah, Beer Olympics. It was so funny because Ted Baxter, his dad, like, recorded everything. Oh, yeah. He had the video camera going. At one point, Shoot shooter had it brennan garen had it he was going around interviewing everybody oh dude it was so funny like when we watched it the next morning because everyone thought i was like legitimately mute but then

they saw like the video and i was just like i thought you were mute yeah right yeah right i was trying to talk to fat chicks just like yelling vagina you were yeah you were definitely i was spitting game yeah at those parties yeah you had you had the game for sure no i didn't i fell asleep under the uh under the pool table after we were playing beer pong probably yeah yeah i woke up and i smashed my head on the bottom and i made some chick laugh so i was like i fucking killed it yeah that was the highlight reel i think you blacked out early then because you were all running around crazy bro yeah i didn't know how to control myself yeah i was just happy to be there yeah yeah man you were always there what about um steph's house yeah i remember being in the backyard i was like if the cops come dude i have a head start oh yeah you were ready to rock people would tell me stories

about how the cops used to go there and stuff. So I'd get it back in my head. The basement one, that one sucked. I remember literally everyone was inside raging. And I was in the backyard just chilling on Scott's turf crow. I'm like, dude, the second I see a cop, man, I'm hopping this fence. You're running. I was like, I'm running four miles. You and the goats. You're going to go sleep in the goat pen.

I'm running four miles home, dude. I'm going to be the only one. Oh, my God. Yeah. Well, luckily that didn't happen that year it was scary back then when the cops came though happened on a few occasions nevin's house for sure yeah i remember those days yeah i remember funny story it's uh i want to never i was the last one there like the cops are there everybody cut their parents call whatever come pick them up i'm clearly i'm the last one because my dad was drinking that whole time all night so he's like i'm not coming to fucking get you this cost and i don't blame him

i don't fucking blame him so uh he ended up waiting for my sister to come over and she she drove it because she didn't have a license at the time so she had a permit so she drove my dad over there yeah and uh by the time they got there the cops actually left which is me yeah just bullshit left yeah they left shit yeah that's how late it was yeah yeah it was like it was such a weird experience because like everyone was drunk but like i was in such a good mood you know yeah i just turned the corner in the kitchen i was like how we doing and the cops are just right in your face they're like yeah you better sit the And the cops were just right in your face. They're like,

yeah, you better sit the fuck down. You're just like, ah. Yeah, the worst part was they took all of our beer. Couldn't even hide any. They went and like

searched the whole house. Yeah. And the best part was I think Devin's parents are still there. Oh my God. Yeah, they were like hiding

in the closet or something. I don't know. Good times though, man. Good times. It's crazy how young we were, dude.

We were. That was back in the day where we were like, it's so weird, man, like drinking now, like, you know, I don't know. Good times though, man. Good times. It's crazy how young we were, dude. We were. That was back in the day. It's so weird, man. Drinking now, I don't know if you feel this way, I don't really feel the same I used to. You know what I mean?

Yeah. It was always cooler when I was underage. Yeah. Definitely. I don't know if that was, maybe that was it, man. Maybe it was just because

you were living life on the edge. You were younger and you were like, I did fake IDs. Yeah, fuck the law, man. You know what I'm saying? Literally. Fuck the popo.

The pigs couldn't even touch us. We were like freaking John's parties in the fire in the freaking middle of Schofield Farms. Yeah, there was so many, man. What were we thinking? Of course we're going to get caught. There's a giant fire. You can see it from Nate Whipple Highway.

Yeah, there weren't like a lot of logistics. Yeah. No, no, yeah. Never thought through. Never thought through. It wasn't really planned out, man. Good times, though, dude. Nate Whipple Highway Yeah Yeah there weren't like A lot of logistics Yeah No no yeah Never thought through Never thought through Wasn't really planned out man Good times though dude Yeah

So we actually did Think it through And then We had like Houses Some of this fly dude I don't know It's coming after us

I don't think I've ever seen A fucking fly in here dude It'll go away I got this Take out a machine you went to chopsticks huh I think you got it in you Johnny take out an AR dude

start shooting lights up his whole house you'd be like hey thanks for having me man yeah yeah like I hope the dogs are okay straight bullet you know good seeing you Johnny

it's a little too crazy for me No I'd probably ask for another one Like hey you got a hook Pow pow pow pow Just close it out with that Thanks for watching Oh shit That'd be a good way to go

Famous man Holy shit Famous Yeah You mean infamous Oh yeah That'd be a good sentence Have it all on video too Oh yeah You you got a good sentence?

Have it all on video too Oh yeah You got it on video Did you show you're not carrying Anything under there bro? Just like not guilty Judge You kidding me? Like a video

You fucking recorded it That'd be fucking funny man And then you put it on YouTube. Yeah, like some idiots. It is kind of, I mean, sometimes I think about that. I'm like, dude, if I could just do something. Fucking. That goes for you.

If I could just shoot something. If I could do something that I think about in real life, like in real time. Oh, my God. I could get a good amount of you they would go back to this now no planning right just right off the noggin if i was at like a low on a saturday dude and just got me on video just like shredding it through the uh the sheds outside nobody ever buys Gary Reedy would come on

You know What was that Like I know that fucking kid They're just sitting there man Somebody's gotta do Something about that dude Either buy them Or just drive through them

You know what I'm saying Gotta do something I mean that's That's a better use Than what they're probably Gonna be used for You know just storing shit Yeah

10 minutes of fun There's like human trafficking Going on in there Oh my god Never looked inside Of one of those You know next time I go into Lowe's

Yeah just jokes Just jokes people Somebody's gonna write us up There's a couple of Haitians in these sheds Right now These small Haitians This is gonna be

A huge raid tomorrow The North Outer Borough of Lowe's Hiding in small Haitians Be like an Asian Massage parlor right now. These small Asians. This is going to be a huge raid tomorrow. The North Alabama low is hiding small Asians. Be like an Asian massage parlor. Oh, man. Rob Crapper

already been there then, huh? Hey. Yeah, I wonder what he did there, man. You know what I'm saying? I wonder if he was under.

What do you think he did? He got a nice little handy dude. Of course. You think that's it? I would assume. Yeah. You think anybody else wants to hop on

those old balls? Come on. Just touch it with your hand. It'll be good. Yeah, I mean those old balls with like six hundreds. He's just got a roll of hundreds under his balls. In his gooch.

Just like the blood diamond Under his butt You can spend so much money What are you willing to do for it? Shake that ass girl Oh yeah man Who knows what he was doing in there dude I don't know

I feel like he was into Like some freaky shit dude I think I think it's just Florida things You know Fucking sweating balls You are sweating pretty bad, dude. Well, it's such a fucking nice day out.

You open a window. What are you going to do? Just fucking open it. The whole time I'm thinking like, dude, why'd I put the AC away, man? We had the AC going in here, man. Oh, it's probably beautiful. Middle of the night, dude. Rock hard.

Wake it up with the biggest dip you ever. Oh, boy. I didn't think I would have had to keep it out though like it was it was getting pretty cold yeah endless summer man this thing's fucking crazy

in the past few days dude I've just been fucking squirt just dripping huh yeah dude I'm also fucking I don't even have high blood pressure

or anything dude I'm fucking healthy yeah so something's wrong wait a minute you're like doc I'm fucking healthy. Yeah, so something's wrong. Wait a minute. You're like, doc, I'm sweating, man. I might have to take the shirts off in a couple minutes, dude. Before this thing gets soaked through.

I'm going to have to fucking change. A little midway change session. Hold on. Intermission, dude. Yeah. But yeah, what have you been up to, man? Like, you know, nothing really. Just working.

Nothing really. Golfing a lot. I'm actually trying to go play nine right after this. Oh, golf? Yeah. Wentworth. Didn't you play in high school? I did.

I did. And in Juco League. So, junior college. So, you were into it back then. But, I mean, everyone else kind of just made fun of golf back then. Oh, yeah, they did. Dude, our team was so rowdy, though. It was back then but i mean everyone else kind of made fun of golf yeah oh yeah they did that rt was so rowdy though it was best like everybody else we played yeah they were a bunch of queers like stick up their ass kind of golfers or they call you on some stupid ass penalties but whatever you know we were just we were just looking to be like you

guys are fucking losers we're out here drinking all day going to hit golf balls and then playing matches and winning the surprise because we were pretty good we were pretty good man really yeah bernie garen was freaking our ace he was nice yeah dude i fucking i remember dude i'm fucking sweating so much i can feel it rolling down my throat i try not to stare but, it's like, should I get you a towel? I'm sure there's a cum rag around here somewhere. About to jump in my neighbor's pool, man. Holy shit.

Oh, damn. I wouldn't mind a dip right now. Yeah. I'm just fucking laughing so hard, dude. Yeah. Yeah. So far, it's been 10 minutes. We haven't stopped laughing.

I haven't laughed this hard in a while, man. No, but, dude, I was telling Coach Salzy this, dude. Like, that age, I remember just screaming vagina and just fucking swinging as hard as I could. It was literally the funniest thing in the world. I thought you were talking about just in public. I remember you doing that in public a bunch of times. Yeah, that's regular. So, are you still doing that?

Yeah. Oh, yeah. You never change, right? Oh, yeah. Nothing's changed at all. Yeah, people expect that, though, when I walk in. I'm a regular. I'm like, Johnny!

Oh, there's Johnny. They know by now. Yeah, he didn't bring his helmet today. Yeah, dude, we were talking about, like, golf today versus back then. I think people kind of made fun of golf back then. You know, it wasn't as popular as it is now. Yeah, nobody really liked to play it that much. I mean, by our senior year, we had, like, all the randos came and joined it.

Because, like, it wasn't really serious anymore. Who was running the show? Brendan Garrett. So, like, you already know it's not going to be that serious. Nobody even knew there was a golf team. Yeah, nobody really did. Yeah. But we told our friends.

Freaking. How does that work? Like, did you just go to, like, what was your course? Kirkbray. Kirkbray was a course. Really? Dude, that's fucking sick. Yeah, it was awesome.

We shared it with Lincoln, though, but whatever. You know, shit happens. Yeah. But we used to first play at Chimawa. Okay. To, like, practice. Or, like, to weed the guys out who couldn't play. Yeah.

And then we'd go to Kirkbray when everybody made the team. Really? But, yeah. Kirkbray is a great track. Chimawa used to be really dangerous. They didn't have the nets. So yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah, it was definitely dangerous He's some of these guys Hacking it up This one kid. Oh, man. He tried out couldn't hit the ball They probably look like you with first time you play like like doffing it everywhere, right?

Oh, no, I would hit it but I'd hit it like What like probably like a 90 degree angle. Way right or way left? I would literally. Yeah. So you had a little bit on this guy. Yeah. Like there were scientists in the parking lot.

I think he was slow, though. It's like this kid was slow. Oh, really? And he was trying to go out for the golf team. Yeah. He was trying to chase his dreams. Yeah, exactly. He's like, oh, I'm going to be a golfer.

Yeah. Never played before. The first ever. Yeah. Probably. I've never seen it. Yeah. Never played before. The first ever. Yeah. Probably. I've never seen it until this day. So it's me, Brett, and Gian and this kid, right? And he's in our group because Coach sticks it with us.

No one really, a bunch of douchebags. Oh, so you did have a coach? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Big Dick, we used to call him. Coach Dickerson. Wow. He was like 7'2".

Is that why you called him Big Dick? Smash a ball. Why'd you call him Big Dick? Have you seen it? No, I haven't seen it, but I'd assume was like 7'2". Is that why he's called the Big Dick? Smash a ball. Why'd you call him Big Dick? Have you seen it? No, I haven't seen it, but I'd assume he's 7'2". What the hell? Yeah, that's a good assumption.

Yeah. And he always hated what we called him that, so what the fuck, why not? Oh, he got mad? Oh, yeah. Man, why would you get mad about that, dude?

It's better than calling him like Joe. I guess you want to be professional. Yeah, be professional. It's better than like a small dick nickname. Can you call him Small Dick? That would have been, you know what, that would have been even more comical. Yo, be professional. It's better than like a small dick nickname. If you called him small dick. That would have been even more comical.

You know what I'm small dick? He's fucking 7'6". It's been haunting my dreams. He's one of those guys. Oh, man. That would suck. So did he actually coach you guys up? Or was he kind of just like...

He was just kind of like a babysitter for a while. But he was good at golf. And he would coach us guys up, or was he kind of just – He was just kind of like a babysitter for a while, but he was good at golf. And he would coach us up on where to hit it because, like, in golf, it's all about where you place the ball basically. You want to have the best chance of your next shot. So he would coach us up doing that. But other than that, no, he just let us play, which was the best part. We all had our own games.

And my partner usually was Elliot Ray. Me and him were the three and the four guys. Yeah. We had fun because when we went to go play, even if we were batched up with these two douchebags, we would just talk shit the entire time we were playing. If he hits a bad shot, we're like, oh, that was terrible. Get him out of here.

Get him out of here. You're in the woods. Drop a ball, buddy. Something like that. And me and Elliot were pretty good and we'd end up winning most of the time but yeah man i feel like uh dude i don't even know why i didn't take it seriously back then yeah maybe it was just because it was so hard it was like this isn't even worth it yeah the worst was when i because i played baseball too for the town yeah i started

when i was like i think 11 11 and 12 yeah and i played town league ball and then i played golf all summer and fall really so like i'd have the meanest golf swing like going into the next year of baseball so like everyone's like this kid can't fucking hit shit i'm like yeah i gotta go i'm swinging under it popping up everywhere it was terrible but i love baseball that was my first i didn't even want to play golf to be be honest. My dad got me into that. Yeah, now you're like, fuck all y'all. Yeah, fuck all y'all. Dude, I wish I was good at golf, man.

Every time I play, I just fuck. Well, I'm not good. Oh, really? I'm just kidding. I actually lost a little bit of it since I stopped playing. Oh, you lost your touch? Yeah, a little bit. That's what I've noticed.

If you don't play at least a few times a week, it's just like, fuck. Yeah, exactly. I used to play in every day back in the junior college league. That was awesome. We were, like, regional champs three, two years in a row. For CCRI? For CCRI, yeah. Those were fun.

We used to go down to Florida for spring break. So do people, like, at the collegiate level, are they drinking, too? Not really. No, they're just kind of sneaking it in. Yeah. Everybody would sneak it in, especially Dip, because you're not allowed to have tobacco. But people would pack hogs as long as the coaches weren't around. I didn't give a shit.

I wasn't going to call anybody out. It was actually more laid back and juco than it was in high school. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I heard about you playing golf for CCRI, but I didn't know much about golf, so I didn't want to send you a message And be like

How you swinging it You know you could have said hey You could have just called me up Like yeah let's go golfing tomorrow I got a Kinect Back then I got Kinects To go to Cranston for free All the time

It was awesome Oh yeah there must be like A huge networking thing too Yeah Golf courses Oh yeah Yeah It's all the nice ones

It's just private right Yeah Cranston's public You can go play that. I've been into Kirkbray to take a shit, dude. And I saw some shiny balls, bro. Are you talking about inside the men's room? Men's asses, yeah.

Oh, my God. Probably. They were cleaning it up, dude. It was so clean in there, dude. Dude, those were multi-million dollar balls, I bet. Yeah, dude. Those guys were taking like machine like machine waxers no yeah just trade each other buff the buffing on a car they were buffing each other up oh my god i was like i've never seen anything like this yeah huh i guess it's a club thing yeah

it was so nice man just going down there i was like i want to take a shit forever stay in here forever yeah i think they have the bidets there too dude do they i've never been inside the bathrooms like that i didn't try to use it because i felt like i just like drink out of it or something like this in the dump but he was as a water fountain yeah you're kidding well these guys balls are getting buffed yeah man it was so i would have been over in that situation dude it might be so expensive just to go there in general yeah yeah it's pretty expensive just to even join. I don't even know what the going rate is.

My buddy would know more than that. Probably around like 10 grand. Brian still works there. He's worked there since high school. He sometimes gets me on still for free. Really? Yeah. Must be a lot of like-

Which is fucking funny because I got kicked off that place in high school. Oh, yeah. What'd you do? Took my shirt off. Oh, that's a no-go, yeah. Yeah. Somebody, Bowman saw me. He's like, you're done. Get out of here. Wow. Put your shirt on. Oh, that's a no-go, yeah. Yeah. Somebody, Bowman saw me. He's like, you're done.

Get out of here. Put your shirt on. What are you doing? I was like, it's hot out. It's fucking hot out, man. Dude, that's what I was thinking over the summer when I was golfing. I'm like, dude, you should be able to take your shirt out. It's fucking hot.

You get a solid tan. Yeah. Probably improve your swing mechanics just a little bit. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Instead of just dripping. Yeah. I was sunbathing on the practice green a little bit. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Well, this was dripping. Yeah. I was sunbathing on the practice green.

So, I mean, I kind of knew it was going down. I kind of knew I was like, fuck it, whatever. Yeah. That's crazy,

man. But yeah, I, uh, I remember going there for prom too and getting breathalyzed for wearing like a red suit and shit. And I've been there. We were all on the list of the breathalyzer.

Yeah. That was crazy, man. I was wondering how that works were all on the list with the breathalyzer. Yeah, dude. That was crazy, man. I always wondered how that works, though. Like, how you could get on just by talking to someone and just being like, oh, you go here? Can I just hop on?

Yeah. He brings you as a guest if you become friends with him. Wow, dude. We got to go camp out. Yeah. Yes, we do. The best part is the wives.

Oh, wow. Yeah. There you go. Yeah. They're all lady golfers. Oh, dude. That's the best,. Yeah. They're all lady golfers. Oh, dude. That's the best, man. Or if they don't golf, they go in the freaking bar over there.

Let's just go hang out at the bar and cougar it up. Yeah. It should be like your husband's cheating on you. But hey, you can't give them the harsh truth. They'll probably cheat on their husbands is the harsh truth. Yeah. I mean, nobody's ever made like a golf porno. It always like disturbing stuff you know what i mean that could be our opening line yeah stepbrother stepsister yeah why not hey do you want to make a golf porno yeah

balls and holes that's what it'd be called yeah yeah you just call it like the 18th hole oh okay i don't know where i'm going with this the 18th hole. Oh, okay. I don't know where I'm going with this. The 19th hole or something like that. Oh, yeah. Yeah. The 19th hole. Can you wax my flagstick?

Kind of one of those things. Yeah. You want me to take the flag out? No, leave it in. Dude, we're on to stuff. That could get dirty real quick. We're on to stuff, dude. Oh, yeah.

Driving through sheds, dude. Making golf. Let's hope Pornhub doesn't see this. Right? Yeah, I mean, Pornhub on to stuff, dude. Oh, yeah. Driving through sheds, dude, making golf. This whole Pornhub doesn't see this. Right? Yeah, I mean, Pornhub's slacking, dude. I think so. I'd watch one of those. I used to, I mean, I never really used to watch Pornhub.

I'd usually just watch, like, Pornhub. What are we getting into here? What's your favorite psychonaut? No, but I think they If they made one of those Yeah that'd be awesome They made a Nothing hotter than

A girl golfer though Pornhub premium dude So you have to pay for it Jesus It's like nobody's Paying for that man Yeah fuck that Yeah I'm not paying for that

No chance bro Well that's the world man Yeah They gotta make money On something They gotta pay off These porn stars Probably now more than ever

Now that freaking COVID's here No one's got Nothing shit to do Yeah It's like that 24 Jesus

Even performers man Performers have nothing to do Oh yeah Probably can't even do a scene Yeah Shit Yeah man Pandemic

Yeah It's a pandemic Where the porn stars can't work What the hell But dude I always saw you As like a Like a broadcaster Didn't you want to get

Into like broadcasting stuff Yeah I did I did I did Never really did, I did. Never really pursued it that much. I wanted to do radio. I feel like I'd be a good disc jockey. I like music.

Really? Yeah. Just being like the DJ at like Applebee's. Yes. Now you got to start somewhere, right? Oh, when I go to karaoke, you should come to karaoke with me next time. Oh, yeah. If that ever starts up again.

But, oh man, back in the day, I used to rip it up. All the songs. I'd be up like 10 times in karaoke just singing. I think I've only done karaoke once. I think it was at Garen's grad party. Oh. Yes, I remember that. Yeah.

I think it was Nick. That was legendary. You were singing with the man, the myth, the legend himself, Slick. Grandpa Slick. Was I? Yeah. No. Who did I sing with, dude?

It was somebody. I was singing really fucked up. Dude, you were. It was hilarious, dude. His whole family was there watching. Oh, yeah. Laughing hysterically. Yeah.

They were like, how'd this kid get out? Shush, Johnny. Yeah, I forgot who I was singing with. I think someone was trying really hard to sing. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I think someone was trying Really hard to sing Yeah Oh yeah I think they were trying really hard And I just walked over

We were We were like Negging you on Like come on Let's go Somebody had a video of it I forgot what I was Oh really

I think I was singing But like I would just fucking Say random stuff And then know the lyrics Yeah Definitely didn't know the lyrics I know that

I remember that It was like his family It was like trying to eat like Pasta salad Eat like steaks Yeah Just Just turn it over

Just What did he just say? This kid's fucked No I bet You went up like When it was later in the night In the night Yeah

I remember that Dude that was They had a show They had an exact That was hands down The funniest fucking party I've ever been to in my life. It's a group of guys.

We woke up in the morning, dude. Oh, yeah. And Garen's dad just blacked out on the front lawn in a lawn chair. And he just, like, looks at me and Ava.

He's like, yo, you guys aren't going anywhere. And we were like, oh, all right, man. Both had massive headaches, dude. Oh, yeah. He just goes in the middle of the road and just starts smashing the lawn chair because it was already broken.

No. Dude, where was I? What the fuck? I think everyone was sleeping, dude. It was like 6, 7 in the morning. Holy shit. So somebody broke a lawn chair and he was like, watch this shit. Just smashing?

Smashing in the middle of the road, dude. What? Yeah, we were dying laughing. And then he was like He looked at Ava I remember this vividly He was like yo Go get me Go get me some dip

Just packed a bomb Wow And just sat down That guy's a legend Oh yeah Dude it was Trying to get him On our softball team

Mr. Gary Really Oh my god Yeah So funny dude I used to work for the Cumberland School Department At college

Like over the summer Really What were you doing We would cut the grass and stuff And they had us help out The janitors a little bit Okay Dude, I used to work for the Cumberland School Department at college over the summer. Really? What were you doing? We would cut the grass and stuff, and they had us help out the janitors a little bit. Okay. And you remember Muchacho and stuff. Oh, Muchacho.

Yeah. What a legend. So their job was literally to organize the graduation ceremony in the wellness center. Okay. And they gave them specific instructions. She gave a Portuguese guy. They gave them specific instructions on. She gave a Portuguese guy. They gave him like specific instructions on how to set up the chairs.

Dude, so they set them up backwards. So Campanelli comes down and sees it and he's just like, what the fuck? It's almost like

he had to do half the shit himself and I kind of felt bad but I was also like, that is kind of fucking funny. Yeah, that's hilarious, dude. Especially if, like, no one found out until the ceremony started. Oh, my God. There's space in the room. They start walking in.

Imagine sitting on a chair backwards, just straddling a chair. They wouldn't turn around. They're just straddling. Oh, my God. Dude Dude it was so fucking funny man You can't trust me Chacha with that Come on I remember that guy

When we used to come back From winning a football game Or whatever Yeah he was drinking on the job Yeah dude Yeah he was hammered He'd have that horn blowing The whole time

The Venezuela Whatever you call it He'd have that blowing The whole time With an air horn. It went waiting for us to come back. Probably had cameras in the showers. I don't know, man. I felt like he was just kind of sad.

You think so? I think so. Deep down, I feel like he just had some demons in him. Nah, no way. I used to talk to that guy all the time. Yeah, me too. We were tight. Yeah.

He was a really nice guy, man. I just never understood what he was saying nobody knew what he was saying yeah so i'd just be like yeah man i feel the same way i'd uh yeah i'd try and understand him but we'd end up doing hand signals whatever he was saying yeah he was telling me a story or whatnot we'd be laughing half the time not knowing what each other was saying so he was just giving off like really positive vibes and i was like, yeah, man, I totally feel the same way. But he could have been like, oh, fuck your mother. Yeah, no idea. In Portuguese.

Funny story, though, dude. There was a hurricane back in the day. Okay. Wait a minute. Where you going? Side note. Hurricane back in the day? Which hurricane?

There was some hurricane that passed through North Carolina, South Carolina. Was it Irene, maybe? Okay. I think it was Irene. Then it hit us. Yeah. It kind of scooted right by us, and the power went out for a while. So back in the day, we used to throw acorns at houses and stuff.

So we go by this house. Just throwing acorns at houses. Yeah. We thought it was hilarious. So when the hurricane came and like all the power went out We were like This is prime time Oh my god

We're not getting caught Nobody's out here So we were like Walking around the neighborhood And we saw this house And there was like A bunch of apple trees In the back dude

So we just took Like a bunch of apples Oh no And just fucking Blind fired right at the house And later on Like about Five to seven years later

I found out That was Muchacho's house No You out that was Muchacho's house. No, you didn't. It's Muchacho's house. Yes. How many windows you guys break? Geez. None, surprisingly.

Oh, wow. Okay. But we definitely, like, it was so funny because, like, I put the pieces together. Like, I saw him pulling the driveway and stuff. Oh. Like, he would always talk about his apple tree and stuff. He was like, yeah. This is months later.

Yeah. This was years later. He was like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I grow, you know, I grow apples and fucking tomatoes and stuff. He was like, yeah. This was months later. Yeah. This was years later. He was like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I grow, you know, I grow apples and fucking tomatoes and stuff.

And we literally single-handedly all of them. I threw them all at his fucking house. Yeah, we were humming them at his house.

I'm pretty sure he came outside and he was yelling stuff. You guys! You guys! Yeah, I wasn't saying

you guys. Oh, he was probably, yeah. He was just like, fucking, ah! This is nothing. Fucking, ah wasn't saying you guys. Oh, he's probably, yeah. He was just like, fucking, ah. This is nothing.

Fucking, ah, man. I laughed so hard when I put the pieces together, though, dude. You must have been fucking funny.

I was like, dude, small world, man. Now I know why you say his house is sad or whatever. His life is sad.

He has a wicked nice house, too. He lives down the road. We should go egg his house, dude, seriously. Today? Yeah.

I'll go say hello. You can egg his house right behind me as he opens the door like you remember me oh fuck yeah i don't know if he still lives there man i haven't seen him in a while but uh yeah dude it was so funny just to put those pieces together and that was hilarious yeah i never knew what that guy was saying yeah me neither at the time all i know it was fucking hilarious because we were laughing every second every second we were talking. Yeah. I wonder if he even knew. Do you think he knew what sport we played?

Yeah. Do you think so? Come on. We had helmets and shoulder pads. Like, what the fuck? Imagine if he did that. He definitely wouldn't call it football, though. He definitely wouldn't call it football.

That's for sure. I forgot what the fuck he called it. I don't even know. Yeah, you can't remember stuff like that Yeah that was way too long ago Yeah Way too long ago But That's hilarious

Through the days now He threw crab apples At Muchacho's house Dude he honestly Dude nice house And like Tons of vegetables in the back Yeah

I was like This is the dream house Wow Like nowadays That's what I think Like back in the day I was like This is the perfect house to just throw apples at. But now you wish you lived there, right?

Yeah, now I wish I did. I'd love to grow some vegetables, man. Dude, imagine having an apple tree in your backyard. Yeah. It'd be crazy. It sounds awesome. You could just have, like, basic white bitches over just to take pictures, man. Literally, this time of year?

Yeah. Charge $30 a pop. Yeah. Literally. You can do whatever you want. My mom's tried uh because she's retired now she tried making a garden in the back during corona time i helped her out with that we built like a 20 by 20 uh 20 by 15 box oh really yeah to grow what like any type of vegetable. She really had all of it. But she put it all right on top of each other. So it didn't come out too well. Really?

I think that's if I was like cucumbers and lettuce. Dude, it's so hard to make a garden in general. Yeah. It was her first year, so what the hell. Oh, yeah. You'll definitely learn a lot. She definitely learned a lot. She was doing.

My mom tried to make a garden back in the day in the front. Just literally dug up half of our yard. Told me to go buy like 40 pounds of fucking not 40 pounds like 40 bags of mulch yeah oh you find like lowes or home depot yeah that's right back then i didn't even have a i didn't have a truck i got a regular like i had to take a car so i had to take like multiple trips riding shotgun yeah some in the back seat some in the trunk dude she had me like Lay down This mulch and stuff Wicked passionate dude

It looked good for like Literally a month And then after that It just washed over Oh no And like ever since She hasn't touched it She hasn't even tried again

Like today's her birthday Is it? But like yeah Wow What's she doing today? Is she celebrating? Working dude Working on her birthday

Yeah Gotta do it Gotta do it Like I was like I always wanted to be like Yo are you gonna fucking Like work on this but it's just there man there's nothing yeah but it looks so good for you john it's up to you

you started it didn't you you started it i would have to work on that every single week man is that bad yeah geez we need some help buddy you want me to come by stirring up the mulch man making sure the i don't know anything about flowers dude probably kids riding i've got a flower guy really kevin dowell wow yeah really he's starting he's trying to start his own business I don't know anything about flowers, dude. Probably kids riding their bikes. I've got a flower guy. Really? Kevin Dowd. Wow. Yeah. Really? He's trying to start his own business.

Just a flower business? You should see his house, dude. A flower shop or like a garden center? Garden center, I would assume. Wow, dude. That'd be the dream, man. Working on one of those, dude. Yeah. You should see his house, dude.

He's got flowers everywhere. Hummingbirds. Freaking crazy stuff. Yeah. You think he just gets Wicked Stoned? Oh, he is Wicked stoned 24-7. I don't know if you know Kevin Donald. He's always stoned.

That must be the dream, man. Yeah. I get a video from him at least once or twice a week of him just in his backyard. Snipping flowers? Yeah, like snipping the flowers, just taking videos of it. Wow. Crazy shit, yeah. I thought about it a few times when I was in corporate.

I was just like, dude, if I could just work at like a garden center, just rip the bong before every shit. Pull a Gary Reedy. Yeah. That's what he does. Really? He's about, I think he's only got

a couple years left before he retires. Damn, just selling flowers? Yeah, he works at the lowest flower department. Holy shit.

Garden center. I'd just be smelling the flowers the whole time, though. Yeah. Smelling daisies. Talk about moms, dude. Oh, I bet.

Yeah. We see galore at the flower place. Be like, yo, you want this flower? I'll drop it off later. Instantly, security. Who's this weirdo with the mustache? I'm just wicked high. My eyes are like half shut.

I'm like, I'll plant your seed and I'll come by later and plant another yeah man a lot of people don't have the balls though man to have that type

of profession where they're just like living the dreams you're just selling flowers I don't know how good he's doing with it but I haven't seen him in a while

during corona and what not but yeah I'm sure he's doing well. Dude, if I was just surrounded by moms all the time and flowers, like how can you be upset? No, beautiful. I actually redid my whole front yard this year. Really?

Yeah. Did you plant some like Scotts Turf Grow or Big Scotts Turf Grow guy? Big Scotts Turf Grow guy? I did not do Scotts, no. Dude, there's nothing better, man. Yeah. I did Miracle Grow. Oh, really?

Yeah. How would you rate it pretty good they came out great they're dying now i mean it's off season they did in the spring and summer i did spring and summer i feel like if you want to have solid grass you need like a sprinkler system any good grass yeah i'll tell you that right now we live on a well so i can't water my grass or i'll use all of our fucking water I'll try to do that you know I'm taking a shower one day And where the fuck the water go

Oh see there's water in the grass again Dude if you have a sprinkler system though dude Yeah Yeah Pretty serious stuff I mean don't get me wrong That's when you know you've made it If you got a sprinkler system

Oh dude One of those automatic ones That's one of those things. Talk about golf-knowing people. Oh, yeah. If I knew a guy who knew shit about sprinklers, dude,

I'd do some dirty things to him. Brendan Garron. Really? Yeah, he's been working for sprinklers for like five years now. Six years. Maybe seven.

I know. You think he can hook it up? Yeah. Well, you'd have to pay him. I mean, you'd have to pay him, but yeah. I know some people who try doing it themselves

and they save a bunch of money. Definitely do it yourself. Dude, it's easy as fuck. All you need is the box, and you're going to dig a trench all around your fucking house. That's about it. I heard some guy say that once. He was like, he was like, talk, because I used to do construction. Oh, yeah?

Okay. With Josh Pizzarelli. Oh, piss. How's he doing? I don't know. I haven't seen him in a while. But he was talking to us when we were working. He was like, yeah, man, sprinklers are just like the easiest thing in the world. Yeah. Nobody knows how to install them, piss. How's he doing? I don't know. I haven't seen him in a while. But he was talking to us when we were working. He was like, yeah, man, sprinklers are just like the easiest thing in the world.

Yeah. Nobody knows how to install them, though. And then he walked over to the fountain, turns on the water, and just gets fucking soaked. Easiest thing in the world, huh? I can't even stay fucking dry, buddy. He's like, Greg, turn off the fucking water. Yeah, man. Dude, that's hilarious.

Yeah, me and Shooter did a job together, like on the water. Yeah, man. Dude, that's hilarious. Yeah, me and Shooter did a job together like on the side for a buddy Johnny's house. We redid his lawn and yeah, we redid his lawn, we did everything

and we put a sprinkler system in. We put a sprinkler system in. I remember Shooter had, he was like the sprinkler guy, right? He had to go to the store about seven times because he forgot shit. Dude, you do this every fucking day

what's going on yeah man I felt bad because I worked for I worked with Josh but we worked for his dad and he would always give us like

specific instructions and I'd always just like do the dumbest yeah they trust you two together what the fuck is that that's not that's not Josh's dad

I'd be I'd be painting houses the wrong color and shit oh my god but uh everything's white and then this your corner is green it's just it's just prime it's just primer oh that's fucking great no but he was like uh it was so funny because like we were painting this like three-story house okay and he was like whatever you do like he was like oh don't dry paint the house so like make sure every stroke is like you know thick enough like there's actual paint on it don't just like fucking be lazy i dry painted the whole side like he told me after i was like i'm not going back you know what i mean yeah yeah it

was so funny though she was like he's like if you dry paint it like any time a storm comes the paint would just blow off let me guess the next day rainstorm came no he called me out on it like he was really good at his job so he could just be like yeah i know you like you dry painted it but me being me i was laughing my ass off i thought about like it raining and like these people coming outside like at like a family party or something. Half a house. It's like tie-dye. Oh my god, tie-dye your house.

That'd be fucking cool. Tie-dye house. He had me do this. We were doing a job inside once. And I was so bad with power tools. I barely knew how power tools worked. Jesus, Johnny. The scariest thing to me, dude.

What are you using then? Power lines are scary to me. Carrying ladders. He would tell us stories about dudes who carried ladders, hit a power line, and just fucking blew up. Yeah, they just died on this fucking spot.

Fuck, yeah. Yeah, I bet. It's a lot of power going through that shit. Yeah, so anytime ladders were involved, I was like, yeah, I'll just leave it

to somebody else. Don't live life on the edge, huh, Johnny? Fuck ladders, he said. Loud sounds when you can't hear anything. I was cutting a ceiling once, and I was so scared that I was going to hit a wire or something. And he was like, fucking shred it, Johnny. You're up there shaking.

I was like, fuck. The saw wasn't moving. I was just in the same spot No What are you doing? He was like Fucking shred it Johnny I was like fucking

And like dude There was like fucking sawdust Going into my eyes dude Yeah that's the worst I used to do Extraction too Really? Yeah

Such a risky job man Like Yeah I got injured a couple times I broke my ankle Really? Off of a roof yeah Holy shit did you fall off? I was coming off the ladder.

It was a rock. On the other side, just snapped my ankle. Got it stuck in a hole. So a rock in a hole. I'm coming off the ladder, like probably the fourth rung. Put my foot right on top of the rock, slid down to that hole. All my body weight went that way. It's a year later.

Holy shit. Oh, yeah. Dude, that was the worst, baby yeah i would always put up ladders the wrong way i'd put them on backwards dude did you go up them like that's crazy dude dude we uh we redid my like the the porch we did that oh did you it looks nice yeah it's nice so like when the summer we were we also did the siding so josh's dad was like yeah tomorrow man i'm gonna need you to go up and take down the siding you have right now and i was like wait you want me to go up on a ladder true story i'm not good on ladders he tells me to go up and take down the siding so i have to go all the way up to the top of my house so i go

outside the next day i just look at it i'm like no like, no. Dude, guess what? I called Chris Hayes to do it for me. I'm like, yeah, I'll pay you. I was like, yeah, I'll pay you. He was like, fuck yeah, man. I'll do it. He did it. There was no way I was going out there. Dude, I love heights, man.

I love it. You love it? Yeah, I go rock climbing and shit all the time. Do you get nervous? Never. Nope. Nope. Really?

I've been on top of two, three, four stories just doing jobs, standing on things this fucking skinny. Like planks? Yeah. Yep. I'd fucking shit myself. I'm pretty good at, like, balance. Yeah. So I was kind of, as long as you keep your footing right, you're good.

You won't fall off. That's like, what, like a... So I do a lot of rock climbing. So I've gone out to Arizona to go visit Matt Ewick. You remember Matt Ewick? Yeah. Jesus. Jesus. Jesus, yeah.

DeJesus. Yeah, so he lives out there now. And me and him did a lot of rock climbing. He got me into it really good. When did you start? When did I start? Probably, I always loved it. I did it when I was a kid.

But as you get older, where are you going to go find rock climbing gyms and shit like that? Until Ewick was like, hey, I go to a gym called The Rock Spot. Come join. This was probably a year after high school, maybe two. I was like, fuck yeah, I'll go join. Why not? Yeah. And we got really into it, I think for three or four years until he left.

And we were pretty good. And so when he went out there, he's like, Sam, you don't believe how big these fucking rocks are when you're out there. You're about to go climb this thing. It's like 200, 300 feet up in the air. I'm like, what? I'm coming. I'll be out there soon. So I went out there to visit him.

Yeah, we climbed some fucking crazy shit. The funniest part was we got so drunk the night before. And it's the desert in Arizona, right? Yeah. So he goes up. You have to lead climb it first, so barely any ropes. You have to rope yourself in as you go up, so half the time you're not even top roped in.

So he's climbing it, shaking. He was so scared. I'm like, you all right, buddy? Looking at him, he's like, yeah, yeah, I got this, I got this. He gets to the top. He ties it all in. He's like, get me down as fast as this He gets to the top He ties it all in He's like Get me down as fast as possible I'm like

What the Alright yeah So I fucking start taking him down He's puking He's on top Yeah He gets to the bottom He just starts yuking everywhere

Is that like Was that like typical form Or was he just like No it was just Cause from the booze From the night before And it was hot It was like 90 something out

Oh Yeah I was laughing hysterically I was like 90 something out. Oh, yeah. I was laughing hysterically. I was like, thanks for getting to the top, buddy. My turn. He just let me up there.

He did the hard part for me. I just had to follow him. And you climbed it afterwards? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It was great. Yeah. No fear though, dude.

Like when you go up there and you're not like, holy shit, like if I fucking step wrong. No, because you kind of, yeah, I guess you think about it like that, but you kind of like map it out as you're going. So if you fall, like you're obviously not going to, because you kind of, yeah, I guess you think about it like that, but you kind of like map it out

as you're going. So if you fall, like you're obviously not going to die because you're like latched in, right? Yeah, there's like a rope, yeah. But you still have a chance of like hurting yourself, right? Yeah, yep, definitely.

I fell on a couple times. I took one good whipper the last time I went out there. Yeah. We went to this place called Jack's Canyon. Fucking awesome. In the middle of nowhere, like we had to travel at least two hours

up northern arizona where like there's nothing but pines and shit yeah and then just top desert so like you see a bunch of trees and all of a sudden there's nothing like just a flat surface for miles and miles and miles like i don't even know how far it goes yeah but i guess there was a canyon there and he looked it up he's like yeah this just got recently found because somebody drove a plane over and saw it i think i was like what the fuck are we going He's like, yeah, this just got recently found because somebody drove a plane over and saw it. I was like, what the fuck are we going? He's like, yeah,

we're going out in the middle of nowhere so we better have enough stuff. But man, he was a fucking Eagle Scout guy. He had everything planned to a T. So I was like, I felt safe. Yeah, I felt safe.

Yeah, it's a lot who you're with, man. Exactly, yeah. You're with someone who's just like... Yeah, who doesn't know how to rough it. Yeah, like, I would not have thought to bring as much water as he did, but he fucking,

he hooked it up. He hooked it up. Yeah, man, you definitely must stay hydrated out there, man. Yeah, like, I would not have thought to bring as much water as he did, but he fucking, he hooked it up. He hooked it up. Yeah, man, you definitely must stay hydrated out there, man. Yeah, you gotta, yeah. So, like, we go to this jack skin, and I took a huge whipper. Like, I'm on this overhang, had bad footing. I couldn't even get the rope up to where I had to clip it in. Yeah.

So I was like, fuck it, I'm just letting go. Boom, let go. I think I dropped, like, 20, 30 feet. Caught, the rope caught me, and I go right back into I dropped like 20, 30 feet. The rope caught me, and I go right back into the wall. Oh, dude. Flip around, come back. I was like, that was awesome.

Let's do it again. So now you've got to climb your way back up and continue to climb. Yeah, you've just got to keep going. Dude, that's nuts, man. Yeah, it was fun. If I climbed 10 feet, I'd freak out, man. 10 feet? Yeah.

Come on, dude. Because it looks higher. It does when you're up there? Oh're up there yeah but realistically i could probably just land on my feet yeah from 10 feet yeah oh man what was that uh documentary dude there was a doc have you seen that oh um yeah the arnold thing whatever his name is the guy who did uh arnold yellow yellow stone yellow stone yeah big big climbing area. I don't think I'll ever make it to Yellowstone. I'm not that good. Yeah, but he free climbed it though.

Yeah, he's a psychopath. So in terms of like, what is it called when you just climb, like not free climbing, with the actual stakes you put up? With the rope? Yeah. It's called speed climbing.

Speed climbing? Yeah. So he must do that with like ease, man. He actually, he's been at Yosemite a lot. That used to just live there like camping his uh his van and just go up with ropes all the time he knew that route so good so that's why he said he could free climb it yeah and he did it in like the timing was crazy he broke records on doing it yeah but even watching that dude i would not want to watch it. Imagine, this guy could just fall and go on and see that. I was watching it on Nat Geo, and I was panicking.

Doc Veggie was pretty sick. They had the music coming in nice and low. He could die at any point. Yeah, it was crazy. He attempted it once, and he was like, I'm not doing this. Went back, and then one day he was randomly just like, I'm doing it today. That's nuts, man. It's all in your head. Definitely. It's all in your head.

Definitely it's all in your head. He didn't care at all about the publicity or anything like that. Yeah, right. There must have been so many journalists. How many people were watching him? I don't know. He had the camera crew. I saw the behind the scenes of that.

The camera crew were all roped in. They were rappelling down the wall just to catch a glimpse of him coming up. I'd be pissed. And he was going so fast, they said they couldn't rappel themselves back up fast enough while he was climbing. Yeah. So they missed, like, a whole huge part of his climb because they had to go all the way back to the top, rappel from a different side. I was like, what? How do you, like, that's how fast he was going.

Yeah, in his head he was probably like, fuck these people. Yeah, exactly. He's like, who the fuck's watching me right now? Yeah, like, anytime you're doing something like that, you definitely don't want like anyone in your way. And they were probably just. Yeah, like if you tell a journalist to get out of the way, they're just going to be like, all right, I will.

And then they're just like right in your face. Yeah, right. Camera right in your dome. Yeah, it was crazy, man. I know some people who rock climb now, like decent friends of mine, they say it's so hard. Yeah. Just like the gyms that they go to around here. Yeah.

Like the forearm strength that you go to around here yeah like the forearm strength that you need oh yeah definitely yeah i got that throughout all of uh construction doing all that stuff i would never be able to do my forearms were like massive and i can hold on to shit for a long time yeah yeah that's like uh people like that are like yeah man it's a good workout you kind of like laugh initially but then you're like whoa dude like you try it once yeah yeah like my forearms would be fucking cramping, dude. Definitely. The people I take first time is, yeah,

they only do, I think, like two or three climbs before they have to like stop because they can't even hold on to anything anymore. That's how crazy it is. Yeah. Are you planning on like doing something bigger or are you just kind of like doing it for fun? I do it for fun.

I mean, I want to go up to New Hampshire and do a couple of those ledges. There's some good ones in Franconia and Notch. We'll do some of those. How big are those are those i gotta say they're at least 150 yeah around there yeah not bad i mean there's bigger ones out west but i only go where matt ewick goes so he knows more about that than i do i actually want to go visit michigan out in colorado oh yeah how was that that was fun that was so much fun. I knew it was going to be a blast. As soon as I texted him, I was like,

hey, I'll be out west again. I'm making the trip. I ended up making a trip from Phoenix all the way to Vail in one day. It was like 15 hours. Yeah, what was it like?

It was crazy. I went, I didn't go the mountain route. So I went like Utah route. So I was like climbing, it's called the stairs. So like every so many miles, there'd be another step up and then a flat spot. So it was literally called the stairs.

You could see it in the distance. Just a stairway going all the way up to Colorado. It was crazy, dude. It was nuts. I actually see some of the pictures he put up and videos. I got a lot of new pictures of that. That was fun. Dude, his dad would come into my work all the time and talk to me.

Yeah, Teddy. Dude, the funniest guy in the world, man. Teddy is the best. I just got to go to their house one day and just see him. Dude, I would see them all the time. Wow. Because I worked at Citizens Bank down the road, and he would come in and just say the funniest shit.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Teddy's the man. Dude, I would be crying laughing, man. All my coworkers would be like, who's that guy? I'd be like, i have no idea man just a legend in disguise right he would say the funniest shit man just like teddy's the best such i miss i miss them all you know we used to hang out his house all the time just going there

and yeah just bullshitting with them but he would he would tell me about like uh colorado and stuff and i'd try to like paint a picture but i just never could. Yeah, it's definitely, you never know until you go up there. I mean, the reason why I even drove out there for the first night, I was going to go the night after. I was going to play golf in Scottsdale, which is like the mecca of golf. Talk about golf in the desert. Really? It's all desert except for the golf course.

It's green as hell. It's awesome. And that's like where you want to play. So you must be able to hit some ropes. Yeah, you do. You can hit it so far. I think I played one of the best rounds of my life over there. I had an eagle and a birdie.

It was great. But I was going to play again. And Mitch is like, no, you want to come up Friday night. You want to be here. I was like, what the hell is going on? He's like, I got a party for you. I was like, oh, shit, we got a party going on. So I fucking hightailed it out.

Before even morning, I was like up at 4.30 and just, I knew it was going to be a long ass drive, like 15 hours. I'm not going to see much daylight. I started in the dark, ended in the dark. It was crazy. Yeah. So I get up there.

He's got like this giant, I guess like, not like a mansion. It looked like a mansion kind of, but it was up in Vail on top of the fucking mountain. It was just a party. Yeah. I was mansion, kind of. But it was up in Vail. On top of the fucking mountain. It was just a party. Yeah. I was like, what the fuck is this, dude? He's like, yeah, I don't know.

I know these people. I work with them. We're going to go and hang out. I was like, oh, my God. We go in there. There's a DJ set up. They had games downstairs. The deck, huge as hell.

Overlooking the mountain. It was insane. It was an awesome time. Awesome time. Wow. And the best part was we went to awesome time awesome time wow and the best part was we went to dispensary first yeah what are the first time i've ever seen that so it's completely legalized like there's no oh my god dude they had like you walk in and like of course

they gotta take down your information i'm not even from colorado so they're like who the hell is this kid right like what the hell's going on he's like mclovin so yeah yeah so mitch yeah literally is this a fake idea i was like no we're good quickly mitch and his buddy's sitting down he goes hey sam look over here on the other side of the glass wall all the plants that they have and you can pick out which which one do you want it was insane dude that's nuts man yeah how was uh like what is the population like though is it pretty like uh scarce or is it kind of like so like so there's mountains on both sides clearly so the only place you can have people is like in the valley so like everybody's on top of each other kind of roads are like only going one way this way that's it there's no like this way it's crazy yeah yeah you think a lot of people are moving out there though

yeah oh there was a lot of houses being built while i was out there yeah from california probably everyone's leaving california probably cali get out of there i mean i hear the wildfires are even going out to colorado how close were you to like denver i i actually flew out of denver so i was two hours away from denver we were in the mountains mountains we were up at like 12 000 feet like way out there yeah 12 000 feet in the air that was crazy yeah i've always wondered what the population was like you know what i mean yeah the best part was mitch works was like the. Like, the company that he works for. Yeah. It's, like, some crazy, like, retail company that is just for, like, the luxurious people.

Like, luxury at its finest. I walked in there. I was like, what the hell is this store? I couldn't afford a single thing in there. It's crazy, man. Yeah, it was awesome. And his friends or the people he works with are great. They gave me, like, a free pass to go skiing and shit.

It was awesome. Oh, you went skiing too? Oh, you go to Colorado, you got to go skiing. I've never been skiing, man. No? Oh, I snowboard, but you never been? No. I suggest trying it out.

People say it's a lot of fun. I would try out skiing. It's a little bit easier. Because I didn't think it would be as hard when I did it. But I started late. I didn't start younger. I guess if you start young, it's easy to get into.

No fear. You can just bounce around the mountain. Pretty expensive though, right? Yeah. Lift tickets are like a hundred bucks around here. Yeah.

What I've noticed is everyone who goes skiing, they have their own lodge and stuff. Oh, that's also another thing. You need to find a spot to stay at. They'll live like a few weeks go skiing like unlimited so man number one i don't know anyone who does that who yeah right i i'm sure it'd be a good time but i usually do day trips they like have day trips around here really yeah i've also like i've heard a lot like two hours away dude new hampshire yeah you can do that Go up while it's dark, ski all day until like 4 o'clock.

You also have to learn how to ski, man. Yeah, you got to learn, though. Yeah, because I've heard about people like going. Hey, you're going to fall the first time. I'll tell you that. Oh, yeah. First time I went snowboarding. Great story.

Kyle Zemita, my best friend, we went up to North Conway. His cousin had, like you said, one of the few guys I met that has a place up there full time, stayed there all year round. He was a snowboard instructor for Attitash. I was like, oh, fuck yeah.

I'm going up there. I'm going to learn how to snowboard from a snowboard instructor. This is going to be easy. So we go to the biggest mountain in the east. I think it's Sunday River

or one of the biggest ones in Maine. We go to Sunday River about an hour out. I'm like, all right, fucking cool. He gave me a board.

He gave me boots. He gave me bindings, everything. I i was like dude this is gonna be easy huh but go it up the fucking first slope like all the way to the top the first chair all the way to the top yeah and i'm like all right cool i'm gonna learn from this guy we're gonna see what it's like he just takes off him and kyle take off it's just me. Me and his girlfriend. I'm like, how am I supposed to do this? I'm at the top of the mountain. He's like, well, you just go. I go down. I fell the entire way down the mountain. The entire yard sailing.

End over end. Just going the whole way down. At one point, they stopped for me. I guess it's like a small crossroads area with two trails coming. So they wait for me at the top. And it's a giant drop coming into this thing. And I'm going down like the bitchiest way ever, like backs. Just going down. And then I hear everybody cheering at the bottom.

Like, save, save me, whatever. I look up for a second. I put my hand up, and I just yard sale down the whole thing. And I just hear everybody laughing their ass off. The next day, my tailbone, my shoulders, everything was so sore. They decide to go again. We all go back. Do the same thing.

Do the same fucking thing, dude. I only lasted like two hours after that. Dude, so are there a lot of people around you when you're tailboning? No, dude. People are lasted like two hours after that. But dude, so like are there like a lot of people around you like when you're when you're like tailbone? People are flying by me. Flying by me. I'm hitting the deck. Everyone's flying by me like some good Samaritan

stop. Hey, are you alright, kid? I'm like, yeah. My head's a little banged up, but I'm good. Yeah, like what would happen if you were smashed and you just started leveling people? Oh, my God. I don't know.

I don't know. You're going to have to ask Brendan Garen that. Yeah, is there like a referee out there who's like, yeah. Yeah, there is like ski patrol, they call it. Ski patrol. Yeah, would that be like a technical foul if you did that? That's a technical foul. What about the slopes in general

is there like a level of difficulty oh yeah yep there's green circles blue squares and black diamonds

and then double black which is a lot of fun so you could like hit a fucking tree trust me that first day I didn't go down any blacks

I'll tell you that I couldn't even make it down the fucking trees to be honest I didn't even know what blacks, I'll tell you that. I couldn't even make it down the fucking greens, to be honest. I didn't even know what the hell I was doing. Like I said, the instructor just fucking went. I didn't see him until the end of the day. Yeah, so you could, like, if you go on the more difficult trails,

if you're going really fast, you'd definitely hit a tree, right? Oh, yeah, you're done for. I've seen people fucking break a lot of shit like that. Ah, yeah. When I was out in Colorado, I was hearing a bunch of stories. Because out there, that's all there is really is like black diamonds and just hard shit.

So like, they were telling me stories like these guys are good at skiing and they were telling me stories how they fucking hit trees and shit. I'm like, I'm about to go up on this mountain. I'm like,

fuck. Fuck, no. But it was fun. No, it was a blast. I saw Mitch shred it up. I mean, he's been out there since, I think it was three years,

since when I went to go visit him last year. So he's been up there already for three years, just shredding all day, all winter long. He got wicked good, yeah. Shred some nod, though. Yeah, bro. He was shredding it. I would go to, like, the easiest one possible.

Yeah, that's what I did to start. Yeah, I did that to start. I was like, we're at, like, 12,000 feet. I'm like, geez. I like geez i'd also probably laugh too like i'd be laughing all the way down oh yeah oh yeah yeah it's a dude it is a blast that's what i said you gotta get into it it's like a it's a rush it's adrenaline rush i don't know what the heights thing though you're pretty high up there dude yeah i'd probably start crying yeah as soon as you get off the chair you look down you're like what the fuck is that i could see me going down and just like lashing onto someone. Just hold their fucking leg.

You're already on the ground just getting dragged by their leg. Yeah, man. I'd either be laughing hysterically or just be like crying hysterically. I think you might be crying on that one. Yeah, man. I'm wicked scared of heights, dude. To start it, why choose it? But no, I should probably get into it, man.

I feel like it's something I'd probably enjoy, honestly, at this point in my life. You know what I mean? It's tough this time. Like I said, when you're younger, it's a lot easier to get into. Yeah. A lot of people I know, like I go to the gym with Andre and he does it, dude. Oh, do you? And he's like wicked into it.

Cool. He's wicked into it. So you still in the gym a lot? I thought Corona shut a bunch of them down. No, ours is still open. I guess we're just gangsters. I don't know. Nice.

All right. There you go. You like tell me though, like, dude, it's ski season. I got to get in shape. I'm like, what? Yeah. What does that mean? Dude, just go out.

So he's doing a lot of legs then, I'm guessing? I don't know, man. I don't know what he does. I think conditioning for like skiing. Oh, shit. Really? I'm just like, dude, what does that even mean, man? I'll get into it though.

Dude, your legs get wicked tired. Yeah. I'll have to plan it out though i'll have to be like the this is like what i want to buy you know what i mean like these are the trips that i want to take i wouldn't like uh what's that place called in up 146 ski shop plus okay they do a lot of uh a lot of ski trips with like a bus you get it you get to a bus point at 5 30 and they ship you up there with a ticket. They even give you a ticket for the mountain.

It's all, like, for $100. It's, like, cheapest way you can do it. Yeah, I should probably do that. Yeah, cheapest way, especially if you're going to learn. Yeah. You want to do it as cheap as possible. Oh, yeah. Like, fuck that.

I paid a shit ton for the two days I went up there, and I fell the whole way down the mountain. So, like, what the fuck? Yeah, that would be so depressing. It was depressing. I just dropped, like, two grand. The best part was we were at a house. So, like, we were at the guy's house the whole weekend, the mountain. I'm like, what the fuck? That would be so depressing. It was depressing. I just dropped like two grand. The best part was we were at a house. So like, we were at the guy's house

the whole weekend, which is dope. Yeah, that's dope, man. It was. It was a great time. We were like 19 just going up there. Me, Brennan,

Dan Stock, and Kyle Zameda. We took a road trip, convoyed it down. It was awesome. Smoking a bunch, drinking a bunch. It was a great time.

I'll have to get into it, man. Yeah. I will, actually. Yeah. I'll plan drinking a bunch. It was a great time. I'll have to get into it, man. Yeah. I will, actually. Yeah. I'll plan it out, dude. All right, man. Well, I got to get out of here, man. Nice.

Dude, I appreciate you coming, man. Yeah. Hey, John. Thanks for having me, brother. It was great to catch up, man. Yeah, it was. It was hilarious. I was literally sweating my ass off laughing, dude.

I haven't laughed like that in a while, man. Good. So it was good to catch up, man. Yeah, me too, man. I'm glad you said something to me, inviting me over here yeah man yeah yeah man we'll fucking hang out again yeah like that you're only down the road so yeah seriously man thanks for me dude it was fun