The Livy Method Podcast - Getting From Where You Are to Where You Want to Be with Dr. Beverley David - Spring 2025

Episode Date: July 10, 2025

In this powerful episode, Gina sits down with Dr. Beverley David to explore the emotional terrain between where you are and where you want to be. Together, they unpack what real growth looks like, how it demands reflection, resilience, and the willingness to embrace both discomfort and joy. From the fear of success to the importance of journaling, this conversation offers practical insight and heartfelt encouragement for anyone navigating change. Whether you're feeling stuck or simply seeking momentum, this is an invitation to slow down, check in, and keep going.Dr. Beverley is a Clinical Psychologist registered with the College of Psychologists of Ontario. She also holds a Ph.D. in Sleep Research (Insomnia) and a Master's in Health Psychology.Find Dr. Beverley:https://www.yourpsychologycentre.ca/@drdrbeverleyYou can find the full video hosted at:https://www.facebook.com/groups/livymethodspring2025To learn more about The Livy Method, visit www.livymethod.com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I'm Gina Livi and welcome to the Livi Method Podcast. This is where you'll have access to all of the live streams from my 91 Day Weight Loss program. With a combination of daily lives, guest expert interviews, and member stories, there is something new almost every day. Miss the Morning Live? Want to relisten to one of our amazing guest experts? Well, this is the place.

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How do we help you feel less overwhelmed so you can continue on your journey? Keep believing in yourself and keep trusting the process. Just be patient. So you worked really hard to lose your weight or maybe you didn't work hard and you have feels about it either way. You know what you want to achieve. You know where you want to go. So here to have that conversation with us is Dr. Beverly David. Hello, hi. Hello, happy July. Summer's here. How did that happen in a blink of an eye? You know, let's talk about that because

I always say at the beginning of every program, show up day by day because it does go by so fast, but that middle park can seem like it's gonna go by so slow. So we have people who feel like they crushed it, they're so excited with themselves and proud, and then people who feel like they just dropped the ball and they're maybe disappointed or they got bigger feels, people tend to sabotage themselves because of fear of failure and some people because of fear of success. So the conversation today is like, how do we make sure no matter how we feel

right now today at the end of the program, that we are able to move forward and reach our goals? And that's a big loaded question, I know, but go. Wow. Did I find the question when you just asked that? How do we make sure that people can keep moving towards their goals? This is a hard one because this, if I'm bringing it to psychology,

you'll always know I'm gonna be thinking about how would we look at a goal? How would we look at progress? How would we look at where do we want to be and go and where have we been? And if we break it into those components that we always talk about, I would be thinking behaviors. I'd be thinking, OK, how did I used to behave? How do I behave now? Have I learned anything differently? Am I doing anything that I didn't used to be doing? Have I stopped doing things that I used to be doing? So we'd snapshot that here and now.

We'd be thinking about a little bit of a journal exercise to be thinking behaviorally, have I changed? What was I like at the beginning of the 91 days? Where did I want to be now? Am I there? And how do I want to keep this up or tweak it? Because behavior is also owning up or it's not even owning up. Moving the spotlight onto maybe what was hard, maybe like you encourage people to do, look at what might they not have tried yet, what, what, how could they super, you know, supercharge this and do the extra bits. And so you'd set yourself that behavioural exercise to think, okay, what am I doing? What am I not doing? What was hard for me to do? And have I changed?

And then you might imagine in one month, in six months, in one year, how do I want to be behaving? What do I want to be doing or not doing then? Then I would go cognitive. I think, okay, what am I thinking? How am I thinking? What was I thinking before I signed up for the program? What did I think once it was week one or even the prep week?

Has my thinking changed? Have I learned about my thinking? Because we know that it's more than just food. It's about our thoughts, our feelings, our behaviour and our body. So have we learned anything, whether or not that's a thinking style and all or nothing thinking, a catastrophizing thinking and minimizing our successes and maximizing our failures thinking. So let's make sure that we're thinking about our thinking, metacognition. And again, tap into the here and now and think, am I thinking differently than I was? How am I thinking about the next step? Am I worrying about the gap?

Am I satisfied? Am I excited for the next chapter? How am I thinking about the next step of the staircase? And then imagine, go do a bit of future tripping again, imagine how you want to think in a few months or a few years. Okay, then we might think physically. Now physically can be all sorts of things, whether you've had a blood panel done, whether you're feeling it physically that you

have more energy, more vitality, more flexibility, more mobility? How flexibly and how physically are you different? And think back, try it. It's why those photographs and that sort of capturing it at the beginning of the program is so powerful because when we then see that, we're like okay physically have I changed? Has my body started to adjust? Am I feeling like I'm free of something that I used to carry? Whatever that might be. And then again, we know the technique. Now, how do I want to carry that forward? How do we feel? Feel, when I use that word, is about the emotions. Do we feel any different? Are we, if we go back to the beginning, are we less anxious?

Are we less hopeless? Are we less helpless? Are we more confident? What did I write? Have we got confidence? Have we got improved mood? Have we got a vitality and autonomy and agency? Do you feel like you are a little bit different?

And then have you started, and this would be part of all of it, but definitely the cognition and the behaviour, have you started to care about yourself differently? Do you now care? Are you more compassionate? Are you more curious? Are you more gentle? Because that's also change and we know that if that's started to change that's going to help you carry on and set your goals or set your visions so that you are stepping forward into whatever you want for success and whatever that means to you. So I don't really know if I answered the question,

but it's how- Drop the mic, the conversation's done. We're done. I mean, did you answer it brilliantly? I think for everyone, cause I see people joining in and asking questions. Here's Martha looking for some inspiration to check back in as I feel checked out, not only in the program, but in life in general.

I'm going through the motions properly for this program and for life, but the joy is gone. How can I get it back? I'm going to come back to this joy thing, but go back and listen to that. There was so much. You're going to want to grab a pen and a piece of paper and you're going to write down all the things that Dr. Beverly just said there. I mean, I think this is a brilliant exercise for everyone, whether you feel like you crushed it or you feel

like you failed, go back and listen like quietly internally and make some notes and headers. I think that's when you said journal, I was going to ask you why, but I think it's like just sitting down and intentionally and actively spending some time on this. Journaling is very powerful. It's evidence-based. It moves what often we hold in our head, whether it's our worries, our thoughts, we have so many thousands of thoughts a day, most of them unfortunately are tainted with negativities

and looking out for threat because we're hardwired that way. But when we invite that opportunity, and you're very right to say, first of all, it's an intention to spend some time with yourself, which often we don't. We often spend, unfortunately, more and more time with the world via Instagram or Facebook or Twitter, and we're in other people's lives instead of asking ourselves, how am I feeling? How am I doing? How am I turning up? And so we want to first intentionally do that, set a particular

time aside every day for yourself. How am I doing? And the very act of journaling, even if you speak it to somebody, you have to move it into our left, more of our left dominant part of our brain, our language. So then we start processing it better. It becomes more tangible. So then bring in the pen or bring in that opportunity to either draw it or color it or write it more traditionally, mind map it because I'm very visual. I'll mind map things so that I can see,

okay, how's my behavior? How's my thinking? How's my thinking? How's my body? How am I feeling about this? And I get to see it. That then moves it into the left. We then see it with our eyes. We've thought it with our thoughts.

We've had to decode it by writing it. And it starts to become less daunting daunting and then we get to see and monitor it because if we do this regularly we'll see what comes up often or what might start to move that we might think oh my goodness it is budging or we might identify thought traps or thought habits or thought styles we might even notice a pattern and think, wow, every sort of four weeks, I am really negative. Where I'm really down on myself, isn't this an interesting pattern?

And then we might be able to think, ah, what could it be of the reason for this? Whether it's hormones, whether it's a change of life, whether it's that's the week we've got the kids versus not the week we could, whether it's hormones, whether it's a change of life, whether it's that's the week we've got the kids versus not the week we could, whatever that is, we're on the lookout for understanding ourselves a little better. So journaling is very important and look, I journal to myself before I speak to Gina every time. I think what do I want to say, and Gina every time, I think, what do I want to say? How would I want to unpack this?

And so it's important. It's not like, oh, this is really, you know, a cheat or a silly thing to do. It's really important. It's the work. And I think if you think back everyone to the diets you've done before, it's just math, right? You're counting your weighing,

you're measuring just like haphazardly foods, trying to exercise here, trying to not eat there. And it's all out there. That's the problem with it. It works. And then the reason why you get it back is because you haven't actually made any change. You go back to old habits that facilitated the weight you gain in the first place. And you have to be intentional. And you have to do the work. And the work is usually not what people think. And right now, I think the work is reflection. Even if you were really successful,

I think the work is reflection. You gave us so many good stuff there. I want to, oh, here's, oh gosh, so many ways, so many ways, so many ways I'm gonna go with this. Because here's Cathy, minimize our success, maximize our failures. Well, I need to think about that.

Heidi was like, I was raised to not brag or be arrogant. So sometimes a difficult mindset shift to actually celebrate any successes. But of course, failures all seem to be under the microscope. And this is why I want to spend time today. There are so many people, and I think what we do beautifully in this group is be able to celebrate successes and support people who feel like they need support. And I don't want to dwell like 93% of people who do the program are hugely successful.

And then there's a subset of smaller people and they struggle for various reasons. And that doesn't mean that they failed either. So I do want to get into this concept of failure because someone else wrote, I failed again. I'm hoping my third round will be different. And I'm just like, sometimes we always feel like we failed even though we were hugely successful. So what does failure mean? Failure means you didn't reach the goal that you were probably never going to reach anyway because you couldn't lose that much weight in

the timeframe. Failure is you didn't do this, you didn't do that, but we fail to look at all the amazing things that we do. Let's talk about successful or people who view themselves as successful. What are they doing differently than people who might be viewing themselves as failing even though they were successful? Does that make sense? Yes. First of all, we always have to think about temperament, our personality, because it probably turns up in more areas than just this. So it probably leaks into other bits of our lives where we may not see our successes. Was it Cathy? I can't remember. She said she's not to brag. We're supposed to just dim our light,

can't we? We're not supposed to be all of that. And that can be real. So first of all, we've got our predisposing factors, our temperament as a person. Some of us are shyer, some of us are quieter about the things that we do and the things that we have succeeded with or failed with. And some of us announce it more. That can be part of who we were as nature. Then we've got our nurturing, okay, then we've got the environment we grew up in. So whether that was for parents or a different style of parenting or family of origin, how did they celebrate or not celebrate our successes, you know, whether or not they, you know, you come home, you've got a 98%. We've all heard the stories of the parents that say, well, what happened to the last two? Is that sort of style of narrative or there's the,

I got 51%, oh my goodness, let's celebrate this because that's it, you did it, you passed, this is wonderful. So we've got to tap into what do we like already. We also have to be on the lookout if we are generally attributing success outward. And you you even said that a moment ago, you said previous diets and culture used to be out there. That's often what we used to call like external locus of a control. What you know, they, they're responsible

for helping me. That little meal thing or the shake thing that's going to help me reach my goals. And then you said actually the work is in here and that's why it's hard because once that's not there how do we learn how to eat and how do we learn how to enjoy and how do we learn to be okay with our hunger cues and our full cues and things like that? So the same with our successes. Do we leave it out there and say, well, I only was successful because I had a really great teacher or it was my partner, do we give away that? Or are we able to say, I did really well, I turned up and probably the teacher was great or the partner was supportive, but are we able to also feel our own agency? And that will build up our self-esteem, our confidence, our autonomy, our self-worth. And so it is important to be thinking, how do we measure that? Because if we always think we're a failure, why? Because again, some people will say I'm a failure, and then they'll

internalise it because I am this, I am that, I'm not this, I'm not that. Some people will externalize their failure. I failed because they didn't do this, they didn't do that and they will externalize it. Now which is the right one? It's probably somewhere in the middle, okay, because we don't want to just blame others for our maybe what do I want to describe this as not meeting our goals we want to look at the full picture life could be happening things could be difficult but also do we withdraw do we avoid do we feel fear failure or fear success? What does that mean? Have you, through this program, noticed anything yet? And if not, it might come with the next one.

It might come with the gap where you're like, I want to ask myself, do I fear success? And again, journal it. What does that do? Do you immediately go, no, no, I don't, I really am excited for success. What did your intuition say? If I say, do you fear failure? What's your first answer? You know, is it yes, I absolutely fail at fear failure. And then talk to yourself about that. And imagine what you would talk, what would you say and how would you reframe it if you

were talking to a little person or your favourite person or a loved one, because you'd be very gentle and you'd hold space for that conversation. Why would we fear success? You know, why would we fear failure? Failure is very important. We learn most from when things haven't gone well. That's where we learn a lot. Well, and that's the, like that's a key part of the program.

And we say progress over perfection is that if you don't, like say you indulge in something and you realize that one, it didn't bring you the joy you thought it would. Two, you rag on yourself afterwards. Three, you had it and it didn't bring you the joy you thought it would. Two, you rag on yourself afterwards. Three, you had it and it didn't stop you from reaching your goal. There's so much to be learned by not being perfect. There's so much to be learned by failure that setback is set up for success.

And I think people don't factor that part into their journey, especially if they feel like they need to be perfect. I think it's so important to be proud of what you have done because then you're more likely to continue that behavior when you feel good. Okay, I'm really proud that I did this. But then some people I feel like think that it's more motivating if they are hard on themselves. So which one is it? Are we more likely to continue the behavior if we spend time on the even if it's a few things that we are proud of versus the one thing like maybe the scale we didn't we you know we had some bites of bits and whatever and we relate that to the scale we didn't reach the goal that we wanted to but we feel more

calm and we're more confident and we work through issues and maybe we work through a really hard time through this 91 days we had a lot going on in our lives. Is it, what's more motivating to people to be focused on the things they're proud of or to be hard on ourselves, to kick ourselves in the ass? Why do we feel like we need to kick ourselves in the ass? Or do we? Oh my gosh, I got so many questions. Oh, both.

What a terrible answer that I'm gonna say both. And Dina would be proud of me because it's all she says. There was somewhere in the middle, isn't it? Again, personal preferences will show, do we rise to an occasion when somebody is hard on us? Or do we withdraw and become little and small? Because different people are different, you know, it's like, what kind of coach matches you? What kind of boss brings out the best in you? What kind of interview style makes you shine? Like, it's very individual, makes you shine. Like it's very individual,

but I think probably it's important to do both, to be able to think I'm really proud of these bits. I've really nailed this. I've got, I've really engaged with the water. It's becoming quite a habit. It's becoming quite, I don't have to think about it. It's very automatic. It's just part of my day. When I don't have it think about it. It's very automatic. It's just part of my day.

When I don't have it, I miss it. So which bits have you started to stick like Velcro? And then without too much criticism, because this is just constructive, like to be thinking, but which bit haven't I managed? Which is the difficult bit? With kindness and think, can I identify the barrier? What made it difficult? Is it that I just want to be doing that with my family or is it that's impossible to do it because of this? Un unpack the what's getting in the way

and then see if there's some solutions because in our more gentle mind, in our more compassionate focused mind, in our wise mind, we're more likely to see a solution to think, okay, I can see now that this bit is interfering with my progress or this bit that I would love to add on, what can I do to make this a solution? Instead of just having a problem, can we now make it a solution-based exercise? So that might be, can I prepare something earlier? Can I make sure I take

something to the soccer game? Like, what does that look like? Make it tangible. But then decide, you know, some people honestly love to have a push. They will like it that they feel inspired, they feel like they're being pushed and you know what it's all about also how you frame it. You know when I'm swimming our coach is phenomenal and I see how different we all are and how we receive the coaching okay and I overheard somebody who's she's like oh this is really tough and a said, that's because she believes in you. She sees so much potential that she believes you can do this.

So if you're able to also tap into that, instead of it's critical, it means I'm worthless, it means I'm not doing it, and change it to it's because they think I can do it. I can do this. And with psychology psychology there's this zone of proximal development that often we would talk about with children. It's about not going so far that we're expecting too much where we might then feel like we have failed but getting it just enough ahead of the person's ability that then they're able to achieve it and feel the success.

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Again, that's bombus.ca slash Libby, and don't forget to use the Libby discount. Okay, and again, you can't just writing it noticing it, because it's very hard to be proud of ourselves if we didn't notice it in the first place. And most people will not notice it. They'll come in and they'll tell me things and I'll be like, wowee. And they'll have listed a lot of actions and a lot of thought change and a lot of physical change, but they won't have

noticed it. So it's like, let's take the things you've done. This is totally random and offside. And I want to get to the are we actually high? I think you just answered Helen's question here. Are we hardwired to awfulize? I love that word awfulize. Can we change our thoughts? But it feels like we automatically go to the worst case scenario. I want to get to that in a second. And I feel like you can change your brain, but it takes work, so you have to be intentional. Are you concerned about the fact that people are no longer

putting pen to paper? Is it that helpful of a practice for people that people are no longer writing, they're no longer spending that time, it's just are no longer writing, they're no longer like spending that time, it's just like quick fix, whatever. They're so distracted. Is that, like, do you think about that? I don't know why I just felt the need to ask that. I do. I really do because it is so reflective.

And in different cultures, in different places, it's probably done differently. It might have done, been done at a sharing circle where we speak it. You know, when we speak it, that's also coding it into language. Okay, so we're sharing it. And so that's just like putting it onto paper. Some people will have gone to walk about and had time by themselves to think. They would have watched a fire. They would have gone, you know,

in nature allows us to daydream and ponder and reflect while often moving. And so that is a really nice space for our brain to process and to start to categorize and to let go and to prune. And we often don't give ourselves the chance now. Being mindful is now a taught exercise. Whereas we probably did that a lot more when we might've been in the fields harvesting

or with the cat, whatever. We used to do more with our body. We used to do more with our body. We used to do more with our movement. We used to do less of this basically, less of being in a busy world that actually is probably just sucking the life out of us. So we have to try and think, how can we get back to basics? Make sure, you know, we don't even often if you think about it,

how many of us sit and chat at dinner time or sit and have breakfast together. Everybody is so fast paced. How many of us are multitasking or eating in our car or eating on the move, things like that. Hopefully from your program they're starting to revisit, to recalibrate the compass to think, okay, I really, really want to sit down and enjoy this. I want to actually smell my food, taste my food, digest my food, notice it, notice the colour, the crunch, the texture, because lots of us, you know, will be definitely victims of, oh gosh, I can't even remember eating that thing because I was thinking about something else and I was doing something else with my left hand. So journaling is that as well. It's giving yourself time to sit and lots of people

don't like it. Lots of people, but they that if I'm giving that as a homework, often people don't, they don't want to do it. Well, whether it's fear of seeing their thoughts, whether it's well, what can I do about them anyway? Whether it's I'm feeling good, why would I want to visit my thinking and my feelings? But it's very powerful. Well, yeah, Karen's here. She's like, I hate journaling.

And I think it's not, I think if you go back and listen to what Dr. Beverly said, it's not the journaling. We don't take the time to be intentional, take the time to understand where we're coming from. Like this morning I got up and I have a million things to do and I was supposed to wake up early and work out and all that. I just woke up and I'm like, ah, fuck, I already fucked my day up. And I just grabbed my coffee and I went outside and Tony was on a rage clean of the fridge because

today's recycling day and he's hammering ice. I said, I'm just like, okay, yeah, no, that's not the vibe for me. I can't start my day doing that. So then let me go outside and just listen to the birds and it was hard. And I was like, okay, let's just be calm. And I think that's where whether you're going and I, as you were talking, I remember last year, I was really struggling with stress and menopause and just all of that. And I was trying to get a handle and I started walking, but it wasn't the exercise. It was the time

like outside and what it did for my brain that was really calming on my body. And I think whether you're doing a share circle or a walkabout or sitting in your backyard or doing some yoga, it doesn't have to be journaling. But you need to be intentional about taking the time, I think, to understand where you're at. I want to circle back to joy. I heard somewhere that joy is one of the hardest emotions. Joy is one of the hardest things that humans

that we struggle with. Is there truth in that? It's lots of talk about the differences between, it's an emotion. What is happiness versus what is pleasure? What is joy? And it's it's really it's semantics because everybody has a different or slight different definition for all words.

Some words are really offensive to me. I think, oh, I don't want you to talk about yourself like that. Okay, one of my clients said to me the other day, I think my wife thinks I'm disgusting, it's disgust. But when I unpack, what does that mean? That just means annoyed to him. He just thinks she's annoyed at him. But to me, I was like, oh, disgust! It landed

so deep for me. So that means I knew that word differently. So words are different. But when we look at maybe the ingredients of joy, often it's deep, it's lasting, okay? It's connected to some sort of meaning or creativity or connection like you might and beyond the look at, first of all, think if you know joy, think, do I know it? When have I felt it? Okay, was it when I was watching the children play? Was it when I finished my

embroidery? Was it hearing the hustle bustle of a busy house? What does joy mean to you? Because often it's about something that's going on about that. And then you might think, is that word also content? Is that word also feeling calm? Is that feeling also grateful? Because grateful and joy seem very synonymous for me. And yet joy can often be spontaneous. If somebody turns up at your house and creates a wonderful experience, could it be that? Pleasure on the other hand, might be more sensory. You might feel pleasure having a massage. You might feel pleasure being with

your intimate person. You might feel the pleasure with your intimate person. You might feel pleasure being intimate with yourself. Okay, but joy seems to be more lingering maybe. Pleasure also we know is very part of our parasympathetic nervous system because we can feel pleasure when we're not in threat and when we're not stressed you know the fight flight or faint is not a very conducive place to feel pleasure okay we need to be almost open and inviting ourselves for that moment and maybe pleasure then will lead to joy. But it's, it's, you know I love words, so anytime you bring me a word I think invite everybody, all of your members, to think what does it mean to them?

Would it be a collective experience? Would it be the feeling at the end of, end of the day when you're thinking back to things? It's when I invite people to think about their magic moments, whether it's three fantastic, five fantastic, some people call them glitter moments, whatever that is we want. And because one of your members rightly said, why have we got this brain that's wired for, what was it? Awful. What? I can't, I couldn't say it. Um, but it is, it is hard.

Orphanizing. It is hardwired to look for threat and look for, am I safe? Am I sound? And so we need to be very intentional in building up that wiring, hardwiring the happiness to be thinking, I'm going gonna notice that cardinal in the tree. I'm gonna notice that the cat is just relaxed in the back garden. I'm gonna notice that movement in that brook

that I'm sitting next to. And if that makes you feel good, soak it in, whether it's, you know, somebody holding a little person's hand crossing the road or somebody paying it forward at the supermarket. It's very important for us to try and open our eyes so that we've got a better chance of receiving this really beautiful information. Yeah, your brain is designed to change. It's wired to change, not hardwired to stay stuck. I mean, there is some, maybe that sort of like, you know, where it's wired to how we were back in the day.

Right, there's a reason why we have fear and the reason why we have those things to protect us and all that, but you absolutely can change your brain. I'm thinking about all of the work that... because you have to be intentional about wanting to change and people, whether they like it or not, what's so great about the program is it forces you to change. Just by going through the steps week to week to week, it brings up the issues and associations

and things. That's what really essentially makes it different because we're going to make real sustainable change so that you have a chance at being able to create, I don't want to say a new life, but a life that sustains your weights and your habits and all of that. You're designing the life that you want to live for lack of a better statement. In doing that, in getting so in tune with ourselves, and I don't want to let me take a minute to see how I want to frame this, because it's like, how we unlocked or

open Pandora's box, right? Like we're, we think it's about the food, we think it's about weight loss, but oh, my gosh, I know it's about so much more than that. It helps you get into with when to eat what to eat, how much to eat. Also helps you get in tune with what works for you, what doesn't work for you, which will cause you to see things differently. Is that, could that be what's happening with people who are unlocking Pandora's box?

And that's why we have these big emotions about where we're at. It's funny, because you're the second person to say Pandora's box to me this week. That's uncanny. I haven't heard it in such a long time. It's definitely going to bring things up, isn't it? And why your program is lovely is because it does, you know, because we're not,

we're not, you're not asking us to be passive. You're not asking us to leave, leave it to you to do it for us. You're inviting people to learn and to do it in sight themselves, because that's more likely going to work when we start noticing what helps me do that, what gets in the way of me doing that. When people come to see me for psychology, I often tell them you're going to be exhausted. And they often don't believe me. Like on the first session, especially, I say you will feel really exhausted this evening. So be

kind to yourself, be compassionate to yourself, try and take it easy. And then the second time I see them, they're like, you were right. You were totally right. And some of them will have had to go to bed early, or they just don't want to talk very much that evening, because emotions are exhausting. And they're in there. Okay, they're in there. So if we want to change, we have to change what we're doing. If we want to stay the same, don't change anything. But if you do see potential and you want something else,

it's gonna, like you said, the very beginning take the work. And that takes effort, that takes dredging up anything. If you're planting a beautiful garden, you will have put muscle work into it. If you've paid somebody else to do it, you've paid financially. Like it's gonna cost you some way,

but if what you reap is wonderful, then it's worth it. So you will be tired. You probably will think, oh my goodness, what if I unearthed? And some people won't like it. Some people that aren't on the journey with you won't want you to change because often then we start noticing other people. Then we all become psychologists. Okay. Then we're like, oh, I see what you're doing. I see it. Because it's easier to tell other people what they're doing than ourselves, you know, you're definitely emotionally eating. Oh, yes, you're definitely just. So we start becoming a bit, you know, know it all. And then we've got to try

and think, okay, so I am learning, how can I also bring that up to myself so that I'm noticing how can I also bring that up to myself so that I'm noticing when this happens and if that happens. But some people will not like it because our partners and our people that have relied on us staying the same, whether that's drinking with them at night, not going to bed at a proper time, you know, having that bag of crisps together, like it's going to be a little bit jarring for them. So you've also got to be mindful of that. You might lose friends, you might gain friends, you might lose little bits of the relationship, but you might gain somewhere else. So it is it's it's costly, isn't it? Because you've got to, it's not just you, we don't live in a vacuum.

Yeah. Someone, one of our members, and I've said it so many times since, so blatantly pointed out, you are in the pursuit of change. You are going to notice the change and some of it comfortable, some of it uncomfortable, some of it you expected and wanted, and some of it you didn't even factor in at the end of the day. I love Sandy's comment here, such a powerful conversation. I feel like I've unpacked so many layers during this program. And that's what I wanted this conversation to be. It ended up being so much more an opportunity to really reflect,

kind of just reset for some of you, knowing that we're going to be rolling into the summer. What's your expectation for the fall? How do you unpack and deal with the feelings, whether you feel amazing or you feel maybe not so amazing? Before we go, Dr. Beverly, people are feeling ways about the summer, the end of the program, as they always do. Just like any diet, you're going to keep continuing until you reach your goal. The living method is no different, although this 91 day session has ended. We do have the summer club if you're looking for support and motivation over the summer. And then the fall, I love the opportunity for people to kind of see what they've got. I think

it's, there's so much in that. What's your advice for people who are maybe feeling a little apprehensive about the big gap in between groups or the summer or just feeling like they're left on their own for a little bit? What's the upside and the benefit of that? Or what do you want to say there in like 30 seconds? Yeah, I think you even said it a little bit in the introduction. This is an opportunity to see, to see what stuck, to see what has felt grown quite well.

And even even in psychology, we say a phased phased approach is really great. Staying in it forever doesn't give you the chance to go, okay, let me go alone for a bit, let me try six months, let me try a couple of years, because you can always re-engage with it. I know waiting times are ridiculous, but you want to know, can I ride the bike myself? If our parent holds the saddle for the rest of our lives, we don't know how far are we going to go on that bike. So use it as a time to think, okay, I want to see how this is. Notice the feelings exactly like you asked us to do, to think, are we thinking, oh my goodness, she's deserting us. I'm by alone. I

can't do this without her. And then be really kind to yourself. Is that true? Have you learned something? Can you do some things without Gina until you may reconnect in a new group? Or let's see. Because this is quite a nice time in, you know, Canadian schools have already finished, British schools will be finishing soon. We take a break, you know, and we don't say to our children, oh yeah, you're going to forget everything by September. You are just going to basically go back to JK because you have to be, you know, it doesn't happen. So at the end of school and when we graduate, we do what you've invited us to do today. Think about and reflect. You said reflection. I love that. Be proud of ourselves. It's not all about the grades. It's about the

teacher relationships, the friendships, the sports we might have tried, the books we might have read. Whatever it is, it's the same sort of opportunity. Think of this as you're just graduating this year, you're graduating this season or this chapter or this program. What have you learned? What do you hope stays? And then through the summer, be really kind to yourself and be wild to think, wow, that really has become a habit. And then notice, oh, those bits are really hard. I realized that summer brings this bit for me.

So use it as a canvas to collect data. Yeah, what I always love when the summer comes to an end and we start up in the fall, people are like, oh, I'm so proud of myself. I an end and we start up in the fall, people are like, I'm so proud of myself. I did better than I thought. Oh my goodness, I still was able to enjoy the summer and maintain my weight. Or oh my goodness, I was able to lose a few more pounds on my own.

And you would never know that if the summer didn't come, that break didn't come. And that doesn't mean you can't still join our summer club. And if you got questions or a team of people there to help answer you it can help keep you motivated it's just people perceive that the structure isn't there but you do have a plan you're gonna personalize the plan continue what you're doing all that we've introduced this week and we're gonna do next week into and throughout the summer or you can you know there are other options that we posted yesterday but you got this and this is your opportunity to see

what you got right this this is your opportunity to see what you got, right? This is, that's what that is. That's what that is. Because we want this to be where you can ride the bike forever. We want that, that's what your program is. You're giving us the tools, you're supporting us in the learning of them.

And eventually we want to fly the nest and test our wings. Knowing that if it's tricky, we know how to go back and think, okay, I'm gonna revisit that chapter. I'm gonna revisit those questions that Gina encourages me to ask myself. That's why we want to think of this as prospectively good. It stands the test of time,

because when we wobble a bit, we don't need to panic. We just need to go back to the program and do it again. Yeah. And even if you perceive that you have failed, there is so much to learn in that because summer is going to come around again and again and again and again. And even if you in the fall, you look back at the summer like, oh my gosh, I failed. You I failed you're gonna sit down you're gonna do the work that we just talked about here you're gonna understand why and then you're gonna know what you need to work on moving forward right because that's the thing it's not just losing your weight it's not just putting time into maintenance it's that you know when you're just living your life there are gonna be all sorts of

things smacking you in the face all sorts sorts of triggers that are going to keep coming up, all sorts of habits that are going to continue that you need to be able to adjust and adapt and understand what you need so that you don't gain that weight back. So oh my goodness, Dr. Beverly David, you are absolutely brilliant. That is the word of the day, brilliant and Pandora's box. I guess the two go together. You're going to be back and joining us next week with the ladies. We're gonna do a little panel to kind of put an end to this spring summer program.

Thank you so much. As always, you can reach out to Dr. Beverly at DrDrBeverly over on Instagram. You can also find her at yourpsychologycenter.ca. I know her and the ladies have got some fun things that their workshops are going to be offering throughout the summer. Dr. Beverly doesn't know when those are right now, so we're going to give that information to you. Did you get it? I think first week is August the 6th. I'll put it on my Instagram afterwards. I meant to do that. I'll put it on my Instagram afterwards. I meant to do that. That's bad homework. All right.

And then my groups will start again in September. So anybody that wants to join the Calming Your Anxious Brain or the Sleep Group, we'll have a break and we'll start again in September. So reach out if you want to get on the waiting list for those groups. Yeah, we love our guests around here. And so we're going to make sure that we are highlighting everything that they have to offer over on our social media accounts.

If you're not following us over at GinaLivy, make sure you do. And then that way you can keep up with what our guests are doing. Have a great rest of your day, everyone. Remember there's no live tomorrow. So have a great weekend. Thank you, Dr. Beverly.

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