The Livy Method Podcast - Maintenance & Mindfulness Weigh In Wednesday - November 27, 2024

Episode Date: November 27, 2024

Gina Livy's Facebook Live from the Maintenance & Mindfulness group hosted on Facebook. This is the live recording of Weigh In Wednesday from November 27th, 2024.You can find the full video hosted at:https://www.facebook.com/groups/ginalivymaintenanceandmindfulnessTopics covered:Introducing our guests Jody, Brennan & Sean and their experience with The Livy MethodIs there a stigma for men and talking about weight loss?Body image issues in menTalking about how you are feeling and your health To learn more about The Livy Method, and our Maintenance & Mindfulness group, visit www.ginalivy.com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I'm Gina Livy and welcome to the Livy Method podcast. This is where you'll have access to all of the live streams from my 91 day weight loss program. With a combination of daily lives, guest expert interviews and member stories, there is something new almost every day. Miss the morning live? Want to re-listen to one of our amazing guest experts? Well, this is the place. This podcast is hosted on Acast, but it's available on all podcast platforms, including the one you're listening to right now, Spotify, Apple,

and Amazon Music. Hi. Hello. How are you? Good. How are you? Good. I thought you were going to maybe show up today with a mustache. Missed opportunity. I should have. Well, welcome. Here we are, Wednesday, weigh-in Wednesday, my favorite day of the week. I'm sure it's Kim's favorite day of the week too. Obviously. Having a conversation always about maintenance and general health and wellness topics. Sometimes we just get into life and what is going on. And today we are talking men's health. So we've got, we are in the month of November and November is National Men's Health Month. So what an amazing time to just shine a spotlight on that. Not only men's physical health, but men's mental health. And you and I are not the experts here.

No, no, we are not. I would like to speak for the men men but i don't think they actually want me to so yes i try and speak for my husband all the time and it doesn't go over well so i thought that no never does at my house either let the men speak for themselves so we have an exciting panel here today so we have some um familiar faces i'm sure to our members who have watched before definitely some familiar voices for those that have listened before. So why don't you guys come on? I know you're in the background ready to come on. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hi, Kim. Hi, Odette. Hi. Hi. So let's just, I'll just quickly go through who you are. So Jodi, who is part of our production crew, we've seen Jodi pop in and out a few times before. We have Brennan, also part of our production team, who has also popped in, not quite as many times as Jodi, but has popped in a few times before to say a few words. And

today we have Sean. So Sean, I'm sure your name is very familiar. Maybe your face, not so much because you haven't joined us for a stream before but sean is a shift supervisor here at weight loss by gina so he is in the groups he has his finger on the pulse of both groups knows what's going on um and actually sean has been really successful at doing the doing the libby method right sean yeah thank you adet yeah i, I got started 2022 in the winter program and knocked off about 55 pounds, I believe, over the course of three groups. I've been able to maintain that off and continue to thrive. Awesome. And Jody, you too. I know we mentioned it just recently that you had gone through the program or were doing the program. Yeah, this is my second group. program yeah this is my second group this current group is my second

group uh and i'm i have it open so i have 23.2 pounds down um i'm almost two pounds below my initial goal so i've i've taken first group i was like pedal to the metal this group i've i've eased just for the fact that i've like reached my goal and I'm even going a bit below it. But, um, it's been, I joke all the time. I'm like this, I was here for almost a year working before I actually did the program. And I joke with Gina all the time. I'm like, this stuff actually works. And she's like, well, you know, it actually, we're not just smoking mirrors around here. We actually, it actually works. And, and Brennan,

I know you haven't physically gone through the program for weight loss, but I know you had said, like, you follow some of the basic principles because it just, you know, it makes you feel good and right. Yeah, absolutely. And, uh, I'm often, you know, kind of eating in, in, in tune with the plan and in tune with my body. Um, you know, I've learned, I've learned so much, uh, being on the production team and being with the company for the past couple of years. So, um, yeah, it's something that I say, you know, in a way, I just kept over to maintenance and here I am. Well, it's about looking good and trying to feel your best, right? So it doesn't have to always be about weight loss. It can just be about doing these foundational things that just help you feel

good. So question for Sean and Jodi. So doing the program and doing a weight loss program, did you were you comfortable talking about that? Were you talk were you comfortable about talking about, you know, weight issues or, you know, wanting to lose weight? Was this a conversation that you could bring up with those around you? Hmm. I brought it up right away with my husband because I felt that the two of us really needed to get digging into our health in a new and productive way. But it's an interesting question because I thought back to two years ago and where I'm at now and where I was then. And there was a lot of reluctance to actually tell people what I was doing until the results started to show.

Oh yeah. Then it, then it was like a, for me, it was a very physical change going from like 210 pounds down to one 60 ish. And, um,

just the way that my body let it go in layers. It, it was like a whole new Sean. And, um, it was, it was, was like a whole new Sean. And it was, there were a lot of questions of what I was doing, which changed the conversation. Yeah. I think that's really interesting that once, you know, maybe those physical changes started happening, that's when peaks the interest of those around you. You know,

I think that's the same for, for women going through the journey too. And, you know, I wonder like, there's this, if you felt like all three of you, actually, if you ever felt like there's like this stigma about talking about, you know, wanting to feel better or wanting to be healthier, or is this idea that, you know, men don't talk about that. They don't talk about their physical health or wanting to, you know, men don't talk about that. They don't talk about their physical health or wanting to, you know, get healthier, or they don't talk about their, even their emotional health and their mental health. You know, did you, do you find that that plays a part ever, or do you find that you feel that stigma or you maybe see it around you? You go first, Jodi. Oh, sorry. I could see when

there's three or four guest experts why they sit in silence for a while yeah just for a minute yeah um also before i go i just want to say robert and sid are both in the comments here and we uh brennan and i got a chance to meet robert at the national women's show so hello hello nice to see you and sid we've seen you a lot in there too so um yeah i think for me the i've personally like always kind of well i've done like a bit of yo-yo but like within about 20 to 30 pounds so like for me it wasn't like a major people didn't necessarily see me and go like whoa like you've like sean you're before and afters it's incredible like you yeah you look amazing um thank you and even now i've i'll mention to like my barber oh yeah i'm actually down like over 20 pounds in the last six months and he'll

be like oh i never like i never um i never really noticed you must carry it well or something like that but the thing is like i really noticed like i and just my wife is probably the one person who would be able to verify that as i would just say all the time, like, I just don't feel good about myself. Um, and, but maybe, and, and I didn't really say that to anyone except for my wife, you know, like, so it's, it's not really, I'm, it's funny because now that I've had success and I actually feel good about myself where I'm at, I'm happy to talk about it. Like I will bring it up, like, you know, I'll bring it up at physio. Like, Hey, you might, since you last saw me, I've lost some weight and I'm, I'm an open book. Um, but when I wasn't feeling good about it, it was like the last thing I wanted to talk about. So, and it's, it's definitely not something I think, like, I think guys are, I think a good thing is guys are happy to compliment each other. I don't, at least in my circles, I think that like guys aren't afraid to be like, you look great. Or like, what have you talk of like, I would like to better myself.

I think that just doesn't, in my experience, doesn't come up often. Even though I feel like in the groups of guys that I'm friends with, there would be nothing but support and like, it would be a really great thing to talk about. But it just, I think everyone respects that. Like if people are on their journey, you don't prod or you don't, you know. Yeah. I think what you said there about your barber and I'm going to, you know, just generalize this saying, you know, oh, I didn't notice. I wonder if that is also like, maybe he did notice and just didn't want to say, cause

that's not what guys do. You know, I don't know if that's the truth. I just, there's a thought that came to my mind that maybe, you know, it's something they did notice, but oh, we don't comment on things like that, where I wonder if it's maybe something that's a bit more normal for women to make a comment. Like, oh, I did notice.

Oh, you look great. I mean, I think it's amazing that you said, Jodi, in your circle, in your social circle, that you are surrounded by that, right? Of that positivity and that, you know, your social your social circle is saying oh i noticed you look amazing what are you doing you look healthy you know i wonder if it's maybe a generational thing or maybe it's just you know where that comes from i think it's also society right now right like it's not at this point it's like do you talk about someone's appearance at all so unless it's sort

of like unless i feel like they start the conversation it's not i feel like that's kind of not just with men and yeah is that something i'm no i think you're on the on the right track there i i i think it's um you know kind of in a tikt Instagram, socials world, I think there is a lot of value that's put on how we look. But where I noticed a big difference in my experience was in how I felt. And that translated into the energy shift of conversations in any circle, whether I was with men, women, family, acquaintances, people that hadn't seen me for a while, like my doctor, because I was coming out of COVID on that, like, in pandemic time, right? So I think it does depend. And I was thinking, too, as you were talking, Jodi, that, you know, maybe not intergenerational, but sometimes different groups like there's different pressures and stigmas for for a variety of different groups.

And I think that, like my experience as a gay man is that sometimes the standards that are put on looks and physique and how you take care of yourself and how you look are extremely high. So until I actually started to feel like I was energetically good, I didn't feel comfortable in a lot of, a lot of situations with other gay men or other men in general. It's like just my mind would trip into a little bit of a comparative talk. I was just going to say, I was going to say it's just about to bring up this comment myself did study it's a lot of hello skinnies but none of the guys ever asked like it is sort of you know

um one of those things is that you know what is the reasoning behind that them not asking but you also i think it's freaky and i think this goes across the board for men or women when you're sharing is that concern if i share what i'm doing in my experience, am I then, does it feel like I'm suggesting to someone that they should do it too? And then I'm suggesting that they're not healthy or they're, you know, when I say healthy, because I know like Brendan, your experience hasn't been losing weight, that whole physical and how you look isn't part of it, but notice and how you feel is. Yeah. Yeah. And I mean, I've, I've, you know, had the sort of the, a different experience and I,

and it's, I, I've, I'm careful what I, what I talk about in, in, in this regard, just because of, you know, I've, I've had a hard time gaining weight in the past. And so, um, you know, which a lot of people would just say that, you know, that's a great problem to have. And, you know, sure, but it is also something that I would, I would get a lot of comments on growing up that, oh, you're, you're so skinny, you need to eat more, that kind of thing. And it's like, I was, I just, you know, I couldn't keep the weight on, I'd be constantly eating, and it would just be gone, you know? Sure, great problem to have,

but it's still something you're commenting on somebody's body, right? Yeah. Circles of men, like that's not uncommon. Like guys don't want to be skinny. No. Because that's not like the, I don't know, the Hollywood guy. Not at all. Right? Yeah.

Like it's the... And bul at all right. Yeah, like it's, it's the, it's bulking. And, you know, yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I think that's such a valid point when we talk about body image issues, right? Body image issues can affect men too. You know, we think of women only having these body issues or only women are feel body shamed. But I think that also is very, very true, you know, for the other, for, for men as well, you know, like whether it's this, this, I, this ideal body shape for a man that you see on, you know, magazine covers and romance novel covers, and you see on TV that, you know,

you need to fit in this TV that, you know, you need to fit in this norm where, you know, I think it's more common for us to think that women need to fit into this norm, but I think men feel like they also need to fit in this norm. And if they don't, it, you know, they're, they can't talk about it or you shouldn't talk about it or, oh, it's a great problem to have that you can't gain weight, but still you're making me feel like I'm not part of this, you know, this picture that's being painted for me. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. So I think, yeah, those body image issues can affect, can affect men. Sean, did you feel like, I mean, you just said, you know, in your community, you felt that way being overweight and do you, or did you feel that more so?

No, I didn't. No, absolutely. It's, it's, it's not a funny ha ha kind of thing. But it's that internal experience of, of comparing what the standards are, that a lot of men, I think, will internalize that and not talk about it. You know? And I think that relates back to the stigma that we were talking about earlier. We might not, it might not be a explicit stigma that we're having conversations about. In fact, it could very well be the opposite. We're not talking about it. You know, we're not bringing those things forward. So I do think that like with various,

one of the things that's interesting about the the gay community too is that you can kind of end up in little pockets of based on your looks so if you're skinny then you're with a certain group of people if you're chubby you're with another group of people and you learn to celebrate there is this aspect of celebrating who you are and i think that culture really helped me pop out of, you know, feeling small internally. But I think the real changes really happened for me when I started to feel healthy, which came with weight loss, you know, and I think that that that for me was like, oh, I was going down a very different path, you know, and I was going down a path where the, you know, I know we'll talk about at some point, but where, you know, we just weren't really getting, I was not paying

attention enough to my health to set myself up for a brighter future. And until I addressed that with weight loss and did that with Gina and the work that we do here, I was definitely heading down a path of high cholesterol, diabetes, pre-diabetic, that sort of stuff. And I think that that path can be common. You know, if men are not allowed to, I don't want to say not allowed, but don't feel comfortable talking about it. You know, we make this joke about, you know, oh, my husband never goes to the doctor, or my husband never wants to go to the doctor, or he's afraid to go to the doctor, he won't make his own

doctor's appointment. And that in itself, like, haha, it's a funny, you know, they never want to go to the doctor. But there can be some real repercussions from that. You know, we're talking about, you know, a health issue not being addressed or not being taken seriously or, you know, wanting to, you know, sweep it under the rug because, you know, you want to feel tough and strong and I'm not sick. I'm not going to, you know, deal with these issues. I think it can become a real issue when you're not, you know, thinking about your, your health that way and down this wrong path. And we, I was just reading some stats about men's health and preventable diseases and preventable deaths. And, you know, there's been so many studies and so much research that is a lot of these health, health disorders are, are facing men because they just don't go get the help that they need or they don't want to talk about it or they don't feel comfortable going to their doctor.

And do you feel that that has changed for you now? Like, do you feel like you're more open to talking about your health or maybe you're more prompted to go see your health care practitioner that's made a difference I think short answer for me is yes I'm more inclined to seek out um direct care with my doctor as well as seeking out a naturopath and exploring some of the um avenues that I have ahead of me I'm much much more interested in longevity now than I ever was as well.

And those conversations have a lot to do with being proactive about the choices you're making. So I don't, I'm not against it. I think it's something that I, again, just go back in history for me, because being in the gay community, we always had to, it was always recommended to be tested and regularly for HIV and other things. And so that was instilled in me at a younger age to see my doctor regularly. And I think over time, that's just always been part of my makeup, whether I talk about it or not.

That's a different beast. my makeup, whether I talk about it or not. That's a different beast. Let me, go ahead, Kim. I was just going to say, I think too, thinking back, like I'm comparing to some situations, we talk often about how women are trying to be all of the things and in that they bump themselves down in a priority list because they're trying to be the caretaker. They're trying to be a provider. They're trying to be, you know, the mediator between discussions and stuff. But when I look at, you know, my

husband, for example, he does the same thing. He's got a lot of pressure on him. He's trying to do all the things he's, you know, in the same way that I think that if we look back historically, where they say women were the homemakers and men were the providers, instead of the men, like before, maybe that was the case. And there's still a lot of pressure on men to provide for the family now that men are expected to take on the homemaker, the child, you know, the child rearing and things like that in society, taking care of parents and things like that. There's been no pressure taken off in other areas too. So just like we talk about women all the time, men are also putting everything on their plates and everything that piles onto their plate takes them further and

further away from caring and having the capacity to care for themselves. So I think in that way, we highlight a lot of these things, I think, in general in society for women. But I don't think we always recognize that men are not experiencing anything different than women are. We're just more vocal about it. And I don't know if it's as easy sometimes for men to talk about it. Because when I think about my men's, my husband's men's peer group, is it as maybe what I'm asking is, is it as easy to be vulnerable about what your capacity is and where you're at in the conversations with people? Because I think that's a big part of women taking care of themselves is actually being able to talk about it and talk about how they feel. And I don't know

that men always feel that comfortable with it, depending on the types of relationships they have with their friends, with their spouses and everything. So I think that's a big part of it. And that can also carry on if you're talking openly about your health with your friends, as like I do. I'm very blunt when I'm at the doctor about my health and very open and honest. But if you don't say anything to anyone, why would you say something to this person who you see once every two years? Or why would you want to talk about it if you don't know if it's normal or not, and you're not having those conversations? So I'm wondering, do you guys feel like you're having those conversations

and comfortable having those conversations with a doctor when you do have them? Yeah. Um, I was, I think, um, first of all, I don't even have a doctor cause it's really hard to get one, but when I did have a doctor, I felt, um, I, I felt it was hard. Yeah. It was hard to communicate always because he felt kind of pushed out. Like there were so many people they had to see and you don't really have time to get through everything. And then they just kind of go, Oh, you're a young guy. You're probably fine. You're healthy enough. Like kind of go on, get out of here. And so when it, it would, you know,

it's a bit of a skill I would say too, to be able to talk about yourself and to put your foot down and say like, I actually like, no, no, no. I'm, I'm feeling not good in my body right now. There's something wrong. Like, I don't, I don't even know how to communicate, how to tell you that, you know, how, how I'm feeling. So I think it's something that, you know, I think going forward in future generations is something we can teach our young men is like how to communicate about, um, their feelings and everything, which I think is changing. I do, you know, I do see that in the younger,

younger generations as well. And even my sister works at a school and she says like, oh, it's so nice. I see like the boys all the time, they'll give each other hugs. Like, how are you doing? Good to see you. Like hugging each other, that kind of stuff,

which, you know, existed when I was in high school and younger. But I think it's gotten, I think it's gotten a little bit better in that way, but. Yeah, I would, I would agree with you, Brennan, that it's, I think that, you know, the more that we talk about it and the more that we offer this space for, for people to, to be honest and open with it, I think that's going to hopefully help this, you know, bloom and flourish. I mean, I feel like, you know, I've been part of Weight Loss by Gina now for just over three years. And the amount of men that we see vocal in the group now compared to what it was, you know, even just a couple of years ago, there is quite a shift.

There's still not, we still know there's a lot of them still in the background and that could just be their nature because they're quiet. But to see that, you know, they are starting to feel more comfortable in sharing and talking and, you know, being part of the community and being open, I really feel like that shift is starting to happen. I love that you said that about the younger generation that, you know, if they are seeing it now, hopefully that's going to create the space later on that more and more will be able to feel open to sharing.

And we won't have this, you know, this feeling that they can't talk about or they shouldn't talk about it or they need to tough it out or they, you know, boys, that boys don't cry kind of mentality because they do and they should and they should be able to. So I think that you're right with that. I think it also starts a little bit with not only just talking about yourself to friends, but asking a friend, like, how are you doing? How's, are things good with your health? Like, where are you at? And, you know, opening that conversation up so that they feel they can share with you. And then that just makes it, you know, that sets a new standard going forward. Like, Oh,

this is something we can talk about now. And that, that is just, that's just like a nice thing to be able to have with your, with your guy friends, you know? Yeah. I mean, you want your guy friends to be around and, you know, maybe you don't want, I don't know how open you are, but oftentimes you'll see women. Oh, you you're my best friend i want you around and maybe that doesn't feel normal or comfortable for you know some groups of of men and their friends you know but maybe it's to say yeah i'm happy you're taking care of your health because i want you around for a long

time you know i want to keep coming over and hanging out and doing these things that we guy things we do together whatever that is i try not to worry myself with what you guys do whatever you guys are doing yeah whatever you're watching and hanging out in the garage or whatever it might be but um yeah well normalize that conversation i i think and in my experience too, when guys get together, a lot of the times it's for a project or for a thing. It's not like, like rarely actually, I don't know, like ever, I've intentionally got together with a group of guys that we face each other and talk. It's usually a movie night or a gaming night or, or like, let's build something. I, well, who am I kidding? I don't build things. So that was just,

you didn't build that shelf behind you. It looks very sturdy. I might've put that if it's Ikea, I've put together a lot of that. I can build Ikea. Um, anyway, um, but I think, but it's, it's not the usual, like, it's not the, the, like I just started a monthly movie club with some guy friends, which is amazing by the way, it's like a book club, but just started a monthly movie club with some guy friends, which is amazing, by the way, it's like a book club, but you watch a movie. And again, but I'm like, well, this is great. I'm getting together with a group of like four to eight guys once a month. And and we'll catch up for an hour. But then we're there to watch a movie, right? So it doesn't usually get too deep. And, and, and that's just sort of, I think, what I'm used to. It really takes like a sitting

around the campfire situation, I think, with my experience to kind of get more below the surface with guy friends. And I know, I'm going to bring this up from Robert. He was just saying, he's often more comfortable talking to his women friends, um, than his man friends. So I find that interesting. I wonder if that just says something to about how stuff is received from a woman as opposed to a man when you're, uh, yeah. Anyway. Yeah.

Well, I think the vocabulary, uh, it's a skill, right? Like, and one of the things that I've things that I feel I've really benefited from is having a lot of women in my life and coming And so it has been more unnatural for me to be vulnerable in a all male dominant space than in a space like this that's created with this intention. So I do think that like all that we're talking about and how would we ever break the stigmas? It starts with creating a safe space, but part of that is also inviting. Maybe just an understanding and a care and compassion that the vocabulary a person might have. Let's talk about feelings for a second. Is it happy, sad, glad, mad? If you just got four emotions, that's the typical guy thing. How do you get to a place where you realize that actually it's more dynamic than that we have many many emotions and nuances and how do we talk about them and I take I think that I've benefited greatly from being in the company of women who do talk about those things but are also

willing to hold space like you both are tonight for us to talk about it. You know, like it's that two-way street that I think it's a caring intention that creates that. And, you know, with this conversation today and the intention behind this conversation is, you know, whether or not we are encouraging our men, our male members, or the men that are listening to have these conversations with each other, I hope that they feel like they can have the conversation, you know, in general, maybe not with their buddies, but maybe they can open up to somebody, whether it's a healthcare provider or a mental healthcare provider, you know, that they're able to start that conversation somewhere and know that they're, they don't have to tough it out. You know, they don't have to pretend that they're strong and fit and healthy. If they're not feeling that way mentally or physically, you know, that

they can really take that step and know that they're worth it and their health is worth it and their mental health is worth it. And there will always be somebody to listen. And if they can't find it in their group of friends, maybe they can find it somewhere. They will find it somewhere. They just have to ask. They can ask here in the community. We'll always listen. There's so many amazing resources and we have so many amazing experts. And I think that was really the intention of this conversation is to know that, you know, they, we all matter, they all matter and that, you know, they should be able to have those conversations. And if anybody's struggling physically or mentally, they don't have to do it alone. That's, you know, their health and their mental health matters too. I can see how people say the time goes by quick when you're actually on here.

Like, yeah. Has it gone by? It has. It's the number one thing Brendan and I hear from our guests is like that went by so fast. Yeah. Well, I just, yeah. I just want to thank you guys and for coming on and for rocking your mustaches and, um, you know, bringing light to, you know, just men's health in general and, you know, opening up this conversation and showing we have this space where people can talk about it and encouraging those around them that, around you, that they can talk

about it and they can come forward. The one thing I thought before we wrap it up, I just thought a quick little thing, and I'm sure that Sean and Brennan, guys like compliments from guys. And it's something that I think we can do for eachly i i love compliments from fellow men when whatever it is and i feel like that's just a very simple place to start with a conversation that goes maybe a bit further but i i with you man yeah yeah definitely yeah well i love it and thank you i mean we get to see you all the time i'm so happy our members got to see you and hear from you. And even those that are going to be downloading and listening by way of podcasts. I mean, they're not going to see your faces. We're going to hear your words. And I think your words are really going to resonate and, you know, hit some of our listeners deep. So thank you so, so much. So I can't believe we only have one more of these next week,

and then we're going to take a bit of a break, but we're going to talk about that next week. I don't want to get into it too, too much, but thank you again. And we will say goodbye for now. And we'll see everybody back here for weigh-in next week. So one more before we finish off the year. Thank you so much. And thank you to Kim.

I don't think we can rock her mustache today, but it's getting there. So should I hit the closing sequence now? Yeah, you should. I think everyone's heard enough from us. Is this awkward yet? Okay, I'll hit it now.