The Livy Method Podcast - Midpoint Mindset with Dr. Beverley and Dr. Deena - Winter 2025

Episode Date: February 25, 2025

In this powerful episode, Gina sits down with Clinical Psychologist Dr. Beverley David and Learning Strategist Dr. Deena Kara Shaffer to unpack the mindset shifts that can transform your weight loss journey. We are not problems that need fixing—we’re humans deserving of compassion and self-acceptance. From understanding the deeper why behind our dieting history to recognizing non-scale victories, we explore how to take ownership of our success while anticipating life’s inevitable stressors. It’s all about the long game, embracing progress over perfection, and learning how to get back to our stride when we wobble. Plus, they discuss the most generous interpretation of our struggles and how giving ourselves permission to change is the ultimate act of self-love. Don’t miss this conversation—it might just be the perspective shift you need.Find Dr. Beverley:@drdrbeverleyyourpsychologycentre.caFind Dr. Deena:Dr Deena Kara [e-mail]/TheEssentialsW25You can find the full video hosted at:https://www.facebook.com/groups/livymethodwinter2025To learn more about the Livy Method, or to sign up for the Spring 2025 Program, visit www.ginalivy.com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I'm Gina Livi and welcome to the Livi Method Podcast. This is where you'll have access to all of the live streams from my 91 Day Weight Loss program. With a combination of daily lives, guest expert interviews, and member stories, there is something new almost every day. Miss the Morning Live? Want to relisten to one of our amazing guest experts? Well, this is the place.

This podcast is hosted on Acast, but it's available on all podcast platforms, including the one you're listening to right now, Spotify, Apple, and Amazon music. This is an opportunity to become curious. To learn some things. How do we help you feel less overwhelmed so you can continue on your journey? Keep believing in yourself and keep trusting the process. Just be patient.

I don't know about you, but I feel like a hot mess. Like every day of my life, I'm waiting to get my shit together. I don't know if that's ever going to happen. And I find whenever I run these programs, the first month, we're all excited. I feel like I got it together. And then midway through everything falls apart. I don't know if this is where we're at in the program. I don't know if it's where I'm at in my life, the middle part of my life turning 52. I don't know if it's we're in the middle of winter, and we can't walk anywhere because there's snow banks six feet high where we are.

I don't know what's going on but we're going to talk about it. We're going to talk about the middle part of this program and how we make it to the end and feel like we have our shit together somewhat. I don't know if that's the conversation or what today it's probably gonna be way better than that because my amazing guest joining me today Dr. Beverly David coming all the way from Wales, a clinical psychologist and Dr. Dina Kara Schaefer coming all the way from Ontario, Canada. Learning strategists are here to chat this out with me today. Hi ladies, is it just me? Is it just me? Am I just the hot mess? No, you are not alone. You are in good community, Tina. We're in it together. You can count on us. Yes, it's so true, isn't it? That eagerness when something is beginning and something is starting,

there's high energy, there's anticipation, there's hopefulness, there's the adrenaline, the dopamine, the let's get ready to go. And then we get a little bit tired, don't we, as we hit the half point in the marathon? And there's all sorts of analogies for it. We might hit the wall and we want to be able to anticipate that because we do have ebbs and flows, we have seasons, we have energy, we have night and day, we have our busy time, our resting time, our restoring time, so it makes sense that it's going to happen forever through our life, we're going to have these energetic pushes and then we want to feel the brakes applied. And here we are, we're on that halfway point

of 91 wonderful days with you. And we're all watching you and thinking, my goodness, you're turning up every day. How have you got the stamina to do that? And it, hopefully it motivates people to think, okay, Gina's turning up, I'm gonna turn up. And yes, I might be a little bit more tired today or I might be a little bit more fatigued,

but what can we learn about this part of the journey turn up and yes, I might be a little bit more tired today or I might be a little bit more fatigued, but what can we learn about this part of the journey when we so often get there in life, whether it's halfway through planning for Christmas or baking or a move or trying to learn new habits and new healthy ways of living. Well, can we just keep listening to Dr. Beverly? Yeah.

And then what? And then what? Well, it's just, it's interesting, isn't it? Cause we all think, when do we get to be, and then they live happily ever after. But there's always going to be something else. And this is such a wonderful time to take stock, take a pause, look where we've been,

look where we're going, because remember, that mountain that we climb, there's beautiful views, every part of it, if we take a moment to turn around and look, okay? Instead of just looking at that ever seemingly moving away mountain top, where we're nearly there, we're nearly there, turn around and think, OK, what do I get to see from here, this midpoint?

Where have I been? What have I learned? Where am I going? What have I gained already? Because every part of it is important. And if we miss that, we're gonna miss some really beautiful nuggets and ingredients.

I love that you use the mountain because we're all like, okay, I'm gonna climb this mountain. I'm so excited and I got my gear and I'm ready to go. And now we're like, what the fuck? What have I done? I don't know if I'm ready to go. And now we're like, what the fuck? What have I done? I don't know if I wanna, I don't know. This is hard.

I don't know if I wanna keep going. It feels like it's just gonna get harder the higher I go. Dina, you must experience this all the time because you obviously take people through courses, right? Like you're helping people achieve things in their life and they sign up more excited and then the middle part hits and this is where also people are thinking, okay, this isn't working for me. Like I can't do this. I'm never going to reach the top. It's

never going to end. What do we do with that feeling? Well, I think step one is perhaps settling in to that the project isn't about becoming less of a hot mess. We're never going to become less of a hot mess. Like that, I don't think that's the project. I don't think that we are problems that need to be solved. I think that we're inherently flawed and need fixing. I know that we do turn to lots and lots of systems and apps and trackers and this that and the other like how many productivity apps do people have? How many new habit trackers? How many different kinds of schemas do we impose? And they're really exciting for a minute but then we're left with

ourselves. We're left yes yes and they so I don't think that it's just about getting to the top of that mountain. Because then what? Like, then there's the challenge of getting back down, then there's the challenge of going through the thousand digital photos, then there's the, I want to plan the next thing. Then there's the dip right after the big adventure. Like, boy, are we ever fantastic at finding or making or seeing one problem after another. I don't say that with any distance. I do that too. We're wired that way. So I just I wonder if it is not a project of becoming less of a hot mess, but how to be with ourselves as hot messes, how to understand ourselves

a little bit better so that it's not a final destination of ease, but like increasing ease with who we are, increasing ease in our relationships to use our voice, to make healthy choices. It doesn't mean that there's nothing futile about it. It's just beginning to shift like, I can't actually control the end point. I can't. There's there's way too many things that get in the way and that's the reality of life. But I can make like this really nice choice about what I'm having for breakfast. I can make this really lovely choice about how much flipping water I drink every day. how much flippin' water I drink every day.

I can, to the best of my ability within a family, within a family, try to go to bed on time and get enough good hours of sleep. Like, it's shifting what the destination is. It's like, it's within this day. It's not so far off. It's within this day. Well, I find that where people are at in the program, what's really exciting is all you have to do now is just continue to show up every day. Just that. In the beginning of

the program, there's so much information and there's so much going on. And you think that that's like, that's an, it's easier. But in a sense, I think when things calm down and quiet down, this is actually when it gets harder for people. And I used to say, the living method, unlike other diets gets easier as you go because you become more in tune, you're addressing your body's needs, your body doesn't want this fat any more than you do, as opposed to other diets where you are, you are eating even less and exercising even more, and it feels like a

fight. But then I remember someone once said to me, I don't think that's a fair assessment because it gets in many ways it gets harder as you go because as it becomes more routine and everything quiets down and there's actually less to do, there is more to feel and there is more to think. When it comes to dieting, there's a lot of people here with a history of dieting. And also I want to say, the majority of people will do this program, be like, that was so easy peasy.

You know, that was wonderful. But we have these conversations for people who may be struggling a little bit more. They have a pretty torrid history with dieting. And yes, they may be new to the Libby method, but they have a history with dieting that goes, you know, way back. And they feel like they should have already done it by now. They just fucking want it done. And although they may have spent

only a few months doing the Libby method, it's like they feel like they, they should have it already. Like I just want, I just want this like yesterday. How do we, what do we do with that feeling? Like I deserve to have this. I spent enough time on it and I'm doing all these things and it's not happening in the way that I want or as quick as I want.

And so I think that's the verge where people are about to give up, like fuck this shit.. Can I just say, like, I think there are so many beautiful things about your program. And one of them is how much it illuminates the way that we've all been duped up until now. So we were all set up to fail with all the diets and restriction and ways of like containment and like you know boot camp philosophy of weight loss. That's not what you're doing even a little bit. It's like an opportunity to look under the onion layers, the rock, the hidden pockets, the ouchy places, which is why, no doubt, that person said to you, actually,

the program gets harder because it is an honesty project. It is a wide awake project. Think that that's what we're doing. And so, when I, I'm part of that, by the way, like there is no distance here for me. I'm part of that, Gina, of, like there is no distance here for me. I'm part of that, Gina, of the, I'm torrid is quite a word, like of the,

of the really painful, long, enduring complicated history with food, with movement, with body, with taking up space, with beauty, with all of the things. And actually none of that was my fault. None of it. I was set up like so many of us were to fail. And so if people are coming, absolutely, you deserve to feel luminous and free in your body. You are worthy of peace of mind. And I think that that's maybe what we're here to do and experience. And the stuff that came before, there's rich information to be mined, but also compassionately tended to,

because all those programs were like powerful in their selling of a kind of dream. Like if you do this, then this happens quickly, immediately. And you don't have to face anything. You just have to like drink this, do less of this, do more of this. And somehow it's like about grit. Like you just have to try harder. Just have to try.

Like what does that even mean to try harder? So learning strategist, I'm always working with students who are like, but I have all these things going on and everyone just says to me try harder. I'm like it's it's meaningless. It's in it's in the kind of conversations that you're having that are helping us wake up. Oh oh look at the ways that I cope. I'm I'm nervous, I'm stressed, I'm tired. What are my tendencies? What are the ways that I talk to myself? What are the ways that I do relationship with people? Set boundaries, don't set boundaries. Where am I in the foregrounding of the healthy habits in my life? Do I take a walk when I need to? Or is that to-do list always kind of trumping whatever I need for my own body and

well-being. So I don't know, I have a lot of compassion for that like what came before and that it's not wasted time. We were just all sold a bill of goods that you're helping us wake up from. I want to hear from you Dr. Beverly in a sec, but Christy just said, working through the feelings is harder than following the script of weight loss that was previously written for us. Oh my God, how many cardio, like how much cardio have we all done collectively?

Like we could power the world if we set it up. How much cardio? Fuck that Stairmaster. What classes have we all done? And what did we do? Like we just got more tired. A lot of cardio. I feel you about the feels whoever just wrote it. Yeah. Dr. B. the feels whoever just wrote it. Yeah. Dr. B? Oh, it's lovely listening. It is lovely because because we are all human. I hope that as we were all listening, we all do connect with different parts of of what we hear what we have felt the promises we believed. Because it really does, it's very provocative and it is very triggering

to think, yes, I was part of that, I believe that. And what was I looking for in the first place? Was it acceptance? Was it approval? Did I believe that if I was this, then I was that, and I'm only worthy if I'm this size or look like this? And it's very painful to remember that. But it's really important if we can that honesty bit that you talked about is to

think did it work and that's that can be very helpful in keeping us on our track because if we really notice it when it didn't work it, maybe it worked in the short term for a month and then it didn't and then we felt terrible and then we missed out on fun or occasions or that those bits of our life, that's going to help us sort of ground ourselves into what's working about this, this idea and this methodology, this way of being is hopefully it's integrative, it's integrated in our life and our family, and we can have fun and we can enjoy things and we can nourish and nurture our body that was always worthy, or worthy regardless, I

want just always to remember that. And then when those internal critics in our voice, the bully in the brain comes out, I want us to notice it. I think, of course, of course, I'm still hearing you because we have got many years of learning this. You know, I think I'm 45 now, might be 46, I can't remember. But that's a long time. And so for me to think in a promise, all of this is going to be gone in two weeks, or when I do that thing, it's just, it's built on false hope, it's built on a sandy foundation, we've got to be thinking how it's going to take time. look at evidence that what is working? Do I feel like I have more energy? Do I feel I have more vitality? Have I started noticing that the habit towards the water, the hot water, you know,

I'm always going to my kettle for my hot water. Is that just a habit now that just is there? Do I move around the kitchen in a different way? And have I spent some time noticing that? Is this a more calmness around food? Am I noticing that I am eating more slowly and enjoying it and tasting it? And noticing, am I full?

Am I satisfied? Because these little bits that Jean is so beautifully or often more called to as the non-scale victories are so important. Again, that's that turning around and looking at the view instead of just did I get to the top of the mountain. We want to be noticing all of that so that it helps us stay in the journey because this is a journey. And the more we enjoy these bits, the more likely we're going to stay on that train and think this is somewhere I want to keep going. I love that you talked about all of that, because my next question for you was that,

how do you fight that this isn't working? And, you know, it is still normal to not see much movement on the scale, although we are starting to get concerned at this point. We've had the conversations about reasons why your weight might be slower to move, including sleep and stress. And people are, they are empowered with the information, but when you are just judging what's going on on the scale, it's very hard when you get up every day

and the scale isn't saying what you want it to say to think that this is working. And so it is really important to focus on those non-scale victories. I love the honesty project. I mean, I think there's something there, right? Like beyond just weight loss. I love the concept of the honesty project. I want to, before we go, I want to ask you about getting back on track and why it's so hard when people feel like they get off track to get back on track.

Before we go one step further, what is the conversation for people who are doing really well? Like the people who are like, is there a conversation for them? People are like, this is great. I'm doing the things the scale is moving and grooving. Is there something for them still to do? Or is there something for us to talk about for them? Because I feel like, so rarely are they part of the conversation, because we're always focused on the people who are struggling. What is the conversation for the people who are doing really well? What can they do to reinforce that? What is the, is there anything I'm missing there or the conversation we're not having?

Mindfulness. You go, Dina. Well, just, you know, so one I think most obviously is like, keep going. So there's something that's working and you are a big proponent of consistency. And that's a really helpful word because it helps us move away from like, I'm going to try this thing that's a little bit more extreme for two days. Oh, it didn't work. Like you're moving us away from that. But the body loves its rhythms. dream for two days, oh, it didn't work, like, you're moving us away from that, that the body loves its, its rhythms. So keep going. But I also would want to add to that, what

can the person who is feeling successful, flourishing, thriving, what can they take ownership of? Because sometimes we give it away. And we say, well, you know, it's because I had a lot of weight to lose. You know, it's because, you know, I was able to take a couple months off, I'm retired. I'm just, I'm focusing on this. My students will often do well and then say things like, ah, the teacher marked easy. Or like, this was a pretty easy quiz.

And I am desperate actually for them to stand radiantly in the things that they did well. And so for a student that's like, did you actually pay attention device and distraction free for longer periods, longer windows? Did you actually do your reading before the lecture? So for here, it's like, what is it like when you actively, on purpose,

prioritize sleep? And that is like the clearest, lovingest boundary of family. I adore you. It's 9.45, I'm cutting a runner. I can't, like social jet lag means I can't chill with you because I need to lie down. That's also a script from my, that's my life everyone. So I would just say that don't like keep going and don't give away your successes. And lastly, I know I've mentioned whoop goals before

cause I love them. You will encounter obstacle. You will. And maybe the people who are successful have and they've already planned for it. But if it has been smooth sailing, if the wind has been at your back, if you have been easefully able to like

just create these stacked habits of a number of really helpful things in a row, take a minute and go. What happens when my kid gets sick? How am I going to ensure that I'm still doing my snacks? I'm still prioritizing my rest. I'm still getting my water and I'm still doing most of the things that are working. So what are the obstacles I can't not in a panic anxiety way, I've got to worry hyper vigilantly about everything. No, no, no, just what are five kind of likely things that might happen on the back half of this program, the nature of life, uh, flu, something might happen with my house, something might happen with my car, something might happen with my car, something might happen with my sweet loved one who's an oldie.

Okay, and how can I anticipate the stresses of that? Okay, that might mean that my schedule is a bit shifted, I can't join a live. That means if that happens, I will catch the podcast that night. If I can't do this morning fitness class that I love, I'm just gonna know that in the back of my mind, there's a really lovely walking route,

I got a playlist ready to go, and there's this other gym class that I love, or this YouTube, I gotta take a trip to support a family member. I love this YouTuber who does this. It's just having your plan be ready, not in a train of panic, it's about to happen, but to help you keep with that consistency.

So I would say that keep going. Take ownership of what's working at your don't give it away. Have a couple of pre planned obstacles and your workarounds. Love it. Dr. B. That was brilliant. Maybe I don't have anything to add to that. It was the mindfulness of exactly what Dina was talking about, knowing what you're doing,

what you have noticed, the things that you think, wow, that's really become a habit. And it's really easy that bit. Because if we start noticing that we want to acknowledge, we want to say, well done, well done, because you're reinforcing something that's there for you to think, I'm doing this. Definitely, I would reiterate that don't give don't give it away. You know, we do often do that. And people will do that to me one on one, they'll say, you know, well, well, my daughter helped me out. And I'm like, but did you phone your daughter?

Did you think to phone her? Because that was a toolkit that you just did. You picked up the phone and you said, I'm having a bad day. So we definitely want to think, hang on, what am I managing and negotiating and navigating myself? Because that gives us that sense of autonomy and confidence and self-esteem, especially when we have had hurdles to think, oh, actually I managed quite a few things there. You know, it's important to reflect and think, wow, that day was a little

bit chaotic, but I managed to get my water and I found some berries at the shop and I had, you know, whatever that is, acknowledge it. Those moments that you did think, I want to nourish my body. So yes, lovely. Yeah, I love that. I want to get to, I don't know if we even should use the concept on track, off track. So I want to get to, I don't know if we even should use the concept on track, off track. I want to ask you about that in a second. And when we do get quote unquote off track, why is it so hard to get back on track? But I want to read this comment from Helen first, who obviously has done a post in the group.

I love that she felt like she could share. My post today was lengthy, stalled scale, blood work results, struggles, et cetera. Still here because of the guests, the community, friends, healthy lifestyle, but gotta shed this fat. Hubby said, I should just accept this weight. And we get this a lot from people because I think so many people will start a diet, stop a diet, start a diet, stop a diet.

People are used to that, but when someone follows something consistently for such a long period of time, that can be a nerving for people. Oh, you're still on that diet, or oh, you're still doing this. How do we, do we shut out what's happening on the outside world?

Like, what do we do with that when people tell us, well, we love you just the way that you are, or you don't need to lose this weight, or rather than being like, come on, like, let's go, this is important to you, let's get back at it. I find people are very supportive and other people's I don't want to say failures, but sometimes the people around us are not so motivating. How do we deal with that? I think we even when we're planning something our goal, goals are often long term. You know you mentioned grit earlier on the word grit, Dina, and that's trying to keep our long

goal in mind. If we want to run that 5k or if we want to plan to do a you know a mile sponsored walk or a swim or a degree or a course. It's often keeping that long game in mind. And that's then how we make the decisions in the here and now is being mindful of the longer journey. Now we could change things up to have different similes that would make us go, wow, we wouldn't do that to somebody, we wouldn't say, oh, you're still not smoking, are you? You know, we wouldn't say that to somebody. And yet, why should we be saying, oh, you're still not, you know, eating all the

chocolate? Like, we have to be aware of what's going on inside as well as out, because often we're externalizing our value, our worth, what do I look like, what do I weigh? But if somebody's weighing scale isn't moving and that's why they think, because one of the thoughts is that this isn't working, we want to also dig deep because if somebody's stopping smoking, they might not see that their lungs are recovering, but they are. Okay. And do you want to keep smoking and just think, well, I can't see it. So it's not hurting me because that was what we used to think. Smoking is good for you apparently. And so eating healthy and trying to, to learn more about what we're putting in

our body and the real foods and the energy in that we need and we'd be depriving ourselves of it, heaven forbid, eat that and don't eat that and all the other stuff, the processed food that now is so freely available and often cheaper, we want to think, hang on, if I could give myself a post-mortem when the time comes, what do I want to have done to my insides?

And if we can visualise that, that might help us think, hang on, I want to eat the fruit and the nuts and the leafy greens and the protein and the fibre. I want to look after my body because it's your body, we only have one of them and we don't know how long it's going to last. But a lot of us will put the most expensive fuel in our car and then not put the good stuff into our body. So it's about sometimes thinking, hang on a minute. Some people are saying, oh, you look great the way you are, just accept it.

You don't have to, I want you to think, what do you want to feel like? What do you want your body to move like and if the weighing scale isn't moving yet, because that's also a word yet, other stuff might be starting to repair and be thankful that you're giving it hydration and nutrients that it has been probably missing and that consistency and regularity is key to our body to know what to do. You know, how do we function in the day? We've got to let it know we're looking after you.

We're not going to put you into famine. We're going to try and remove our needed stresses because we know we have enough stresses in our life. Let's look after our body and fuel it. Let's take a minute to hear from our podcast sponsor today because this new year, why not let Audible expand your life by listening? Kind of like what you're doing right now.

So you can explore audio books, podcasts, even exclusive Audible originals that are no doubt going to inspire you but more so motivate you. All you have to do is open up the app, tap into your well-being and you can hear advice and get insight from leading influencers, experts and professionals. Whatever your focus really or interest there's a listen for you. You can find titles on better health, like personal fitness, or maybe some relaxation. You can hear ways to improve your relationships both in your work and personal life.

Or what if you're looking to embark on a new career strategy? Or maybe you want to overhaul your financial life. You can hear smart talk about investing for your future, because you'll find that too. Ultimately, it's all about starting good habits. And that is where audible can help. They can help you reach the goals that you set for yourself. And you can start listening today when you sign up for a free 30 day trial at audible.ca. Yeah, sorry. Not that like me. Yeah, well, I mean, this is because like what we're saying to other people we're hearing we're listening Yeah, right and it's nobody knows what it's like to live in and be in our bodies

No one can tell us what we should do or shouldn't do It's all about you figuring out what you need. I Dina about you figuring out what you need. Dina? I love listening to Dr. Wibrill. Okay, so the first thing I would say is I very much try to take a stance in my life of most generous interpretation. So most generous interpretation of that comment from a husband is one of love, is one of unconditional acceptance. So your exterior can change. That doesn't, that isn't the reason that we're together, that isn't going to change our relationship. So most generous interpretation is not give up. But it is like, I'm here. I'm here for it. The size thing is maybe important for you, but not for me. So I want to really hold the spirit of comments. Like, we could really, we could contort anything,

especially if it's a text, especially if it's an email, especially if it's one line in a day of other interactions. It's easy to contort it. And I'm not saying that this is what this lovely human Helen is doing, but it is easy especially to make it fit with our schema of like, well, obviously I'm just never gonna get to where I wanna get to. We can make anything fit to prove

what we're scared about, the deep grooves that we have left. The second thing I would say is, you are totally allowed to want what you want. Like, go ahead and want all of the things that you want. Yeah. But it's an invitation that you give us, Gina, is to go, where's that want from? So if we're using language like shed the fat, is that yours? Like, did you make that sentence up? I've said that sentence before. I can guarantee you that's like a grandparent,

probably Jillian Michaels video circa 23 years ago. Like I just feel like maybe that's not the deepest, deepest, deepest like spark or want or impulse. What's underneath shed the fat. I want to feel like I could go into my closet and wear any single thing that's there. Like, is that the thing? Like I just, I want to wear some of the beautiful clothes that I spent money on and that I like. I just want to go out and and not and not be self conscious and my skin. I want to not worry about what food is going to be at the party on Sunday. I just want to know that it's going to be okay that I feel safe and okay. And I

can trust myself and I can enjoy. So you're allowed to want what you want, and we just get to investigate a little bit like, where'd that want come from? Is that want from you or is that an inherited, is that an inherited tough one? Okay, I mean, you know, God, I'm so, I just could go on forever,

but we're only in control of so much. So, you know, for all the lovely humans who came to the women's show, 99% of them said, holy shit, you're tall, Dina. So yes, just gonna break the news if we ever see each other in public again. I am six feet tall.

I could want to be as beautiful, petite and live as Dr. Beverly, Dr. Alinka. I am never going to be anything other than like Lithuanian stock, six foot something like the just is so how about I love what is or in obvious too strong a word I get to know what is I'm in a kind relationship with what is so I don't at all think you give up but it's, how do we hold the want, the big, beautiful, juicy want with like, oh, and also like I have ancestry. I have, I mean, I am in a body that came from other people.

Okay, lastly is, you know, if this were just a fat loss program, if you were talking about shedding fat, there's no way like I wouldn't say yes. Yeah, that's not what you do. You entirely encourage us to have if you like honesty project is to be honest about when we take a portion, our pace of eating, do we stop when we're full? Do we know, can we feel when it's enough? You ask us to pay attention to when we're tired and heed that feedback. You ask us to think about how kind of attuned we are

in a day to our feelings, you ask us to pay deep and caring attention to the tone of the voice in our head and the words that they use, which makes weight loss, little by little, an end result of very awake and honest choices. Yeah. So this person gets to say, Well, I can't control the number on the scale. Yes. Maybe there are these like five, oh, feel good non negotiables. I. I can do that and then see what ripples. Yeah, it's so much more than weight loss. And it's hard to explain that to other people too, who they just try and express. They love that they don't need you to lose weight, but you want to lose weight. I'm a big believer in words too, when like you talk about,

so first of all, if someone does say something to you and it irritates you, there's probably a message in that for you somewhere. I always internalize that. But you know, you talk about shed the fat. Maybe it's shedding the weight of what other people think. Maybe it's shedding the old new and embracing the new you, right? Like I always-

It's the burden. Like the burden. Yeah, yeah. I'm always aware of the words that I'm using and a lot of times I'll continue to use the same words and I'm like, okay, wait, let me stop and be like, I keep saying this, what is this about? I do wanna get into when people feel like they get off track.

Now we're talking about a 91 day program. There's a start, there's an end. We're all trying to work together and show up together and finish at the same time. Some people for whatever reason are working at their own pace. But what is the concept? What do you guys think about on track, off track? Like I don't, like there's, to me, it's just like, here are the guidelines. They're not a set of rules. There are guidelines. And your goal is to make as many choices each day that are going to help you move you one step closer to your goal. And I don't really like to focus on the choices that are

maybe setting us back or slowing us down. But there is sort of like, what do you guys think? Straight up, let me know. Like, do we use the wording on track, off track? Is there a better, I know we have back on track, which is our technique that we'll introduce later on in the program. So when people feel like they've been off, not following a way on vacation, it's something that they can implement

that helps their body kind of get back to feeling your best. But let's start with that. So I wanna know how do people get back on track after they like get off or whatever reason and should we even be using that terminology? I know. I'll have to rewrite the book. I'll have to rewrite the book. It is really hard. A lot of people do say that to me. They're like, oh, I'm off track. And I will ask them that question. What does that mean?

Because a shift does often happen by virtue of saying I'm off track. It means you know some information, which is really nice because if we know that there's Pilates every Wednesday night and we haven't been for a while, you might say, well, I'm out of the habit at the moment, or maybe with university we're off track because we haven't been to some of the seminars. So it's like we now know more information, which is lovely, because now we're aware of this thing. So if it helps us think, oh I've realized I haven't been drinking as much water.

Is that what you meant was on track? You know, or I haven't been to the Pilates. Is it because when you were doing it, you felt like you were on track? Now on track is it's like a nice idea, isn't it? It's a it's a image of you're going somewhere, you're in a groove, you're walking in the direction that presumably you want to be going in. So I guess it's what does that mean for somebody? Because as soon as we notice it, that's an opportunity to think, ah, I've learned that that, did it feel better when you were back, when you were on that so-called track? Was it? Did it feel good?

Did you think it was taking you somewhere? But I don't want people to think that just because I don't want it to be all or nothing, thinking by accident, I'm off track, which means what? I'm failing. No. What if we're learning about ourselves? What if we're noticing that, oh, it's harder to consider my body and my needs when it's a busy time or, you know, a holiday or an event or we're going through a life change or something like that. So it is, it is an interesting term, because it again depends on what does that mean to somebody.

Do they take that as failure or do they take it as an opportunity to think, ah I noticed something different about when I was, whatever they are, you're going to use the words as on track or on the plan or you know drinking water. You could just be more specific. You could even think well which bit is it? Is it that, oh, shish kebabs, I haven't been drinking as much water this week and quite blocked up or whatever, you would be measuring it.

And then it's more gentle. You can think, okay, I'll start doing that again because that made me feel good. And that can even be in the stages of change, you know, the pre contemplative is we don't even know there's something over here that's possible, then we become contemplative, we think, Okay, I think I want to try that or do that, then we move into action. So we're doing the action. And we want to move into maintenance

where it becomes more easy. But it doesn't mean we might be doing it every single day. I don't have to be swimming every single day to be a swimmer. It's also an identity. I know that when I can, I will. And when I can't, it's okay. And if I can find another time to do it, I will. So I become more gentle with myself in that maintenance phase. But if we move back and life happens and we're like, Oh, it's been a few months and I'm feeling like something's missing. It's quicker to go back

into the action. Once we've already learned it already. It's quicker to think, you know what, my skin was so much nicer when I was drinking water, I'm going to find that water bottle, because I know that was really effective in helping me drink the water. So it's seeing that as an opportunity to review what did it mean and what do you want instead of that's it I'm done I failed. So unsurprisingly I want to say like between between four interesting things about this. So sorry. So one is, if anybody had any doubt about Gina's awesomeness, I think this is it. How many other people would say, tell me straight, what do you think about this word?

The answer is nobody. Nobody would say, oh my God, live on air. I want to know what you think about the language that I'm using. It matters to me. So that's not false flattery. I'm not interested in that. I think that is such a badass move, Gina. Number two, I'm really interested in when we get hung up and judgmental on language. Language is super important. I am devoted. I am devoted. It is entirely my life's work to make a language, oh my goodness, more inclusive, kind, awake. But I'm also interested in when we get upset at shorthand. So back on track, we know what it means. So why do people, why would it ruffle someone? So I'm really interested in when we get irritated

and judgmental. Cause if someone is like, Gina, I really don't like the way you use back on track. I'd be like, oh, there's some alive stuff there for you that I think has nothing to do with Gina, Gina's language. So as I noticed, I've been around this enough times with you that people sometimes get upset with you

out of impatience, out of the purity of what they wanna have happen. It's not happening quickly enough. So I'm gonna get upset. So I'm really okay with short hands, not offensive ones. There's nothing hateful about back on track because it just means something that is like easy and quick we can talk about.

Now, if we're gonna bring the critical eye you're asking about, what's a track? Well, we do need to honor that there's nothing linear about this. There isn't one person who ever tracked on your app that's like, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, bo Like there is nothing linear ever anywhere except in the bullshit world of Instagram and Facebook, which makes things look like they're linear. So it's a shorthand, but if we're honest,

nothing is un-messy. Nothing just gets plotted and follows a track. Okay. Oh my God, I'm so annoying. I don't know why you have me back. So I would just say that what what like could maybe help if people are like, I get what you mean. But like the track is when when do you feel like you've hit your stride? And when do you feel like, oh, I'm a bit wobbly.

And then Beverly has already given you the solutions to it. Like it's so great. Oh, well, if I feel wobbly, if I feel bloated, if I feel stiff, if I feel, oh, right. Well, when do I not feel bloated? When do I feel like rested? When do I feel, you know, like not quite so tight in my joints? Oh, right, that's helpful.

So when I get the wobbles, what gets me back to hitting my stride? Aren't you glad you asked me? I'm so sorry, Dina. Well, I'm coming back to the mountain, right? Like we're halfway up the mountain. We're like, fuck this shit. I don't know, this is gonna be hard.

How bad do I want this? It would be so much easier just to go back down. But this is kind of like, this is like us trying to drive straight up the mountain. Oh my God, and nobody can keep the same pace going up a mountain. Like you can't just, the starting pace is not gonna be the final pace.

Your breathing rhythm, your heart rate. Like it's just that itself isn't linear either. Yeah. Yeah. And it could be that it's the kind of like, I'm thinking like, it's a windy road. It's up the mountain is not straight up the mountain. And you taking a minute to rest, you talking minute to talk to people is not necessarily off track. And it's just a matter of continuing on your journey. Well, let's drive home this metaphor. And now we're like,

what's in the backpack, right? Like what what? Yeah. I have. Let's look about like that, that really like lovely plush hoodie thing. I mean, what are the tools you're teaching us about what we need? Yeah, to hit our stride? And the baggage, and the baggage. We can take something that's been a long way. Yeah. And I really like your point that we change on the journey.

We're not the same person at the start of the mountain as halfway up and at the top. We get stronger as we do that. We think we are mindful, we have time with ourselves. We are a different us. And so journeys are how that happens. You know, in 91 days, we will all be different. I'm different today than I was yesterday.

I've experienced a whole day of thoughts, emotions, behaviors, memories that make me a different person. Every moment adds to us. So don't assume just because you might feel like this today and you think, oh, I'm only this way, this part way, that's okay, because you're going to be different along the way. Like when I talked to Leo about one day when he's going to be maybe a daddy, I'm like, Leo, you'll be, you're not going to have your 13 year old brain then. You will have developed things. You will know things and have seen things and experienced things. And that makes us a lovely human once we've explored and we can become more empathic,

because we know what it's like to be a human. I really thought in the picture of you being a granny. I know that was not at all the point. Can't wait. Like, can you just even imagine, like the deliciousness of Dr. Beverly amplified even further. I realized that wasn't the ticket. Yes.

Dr. Beverly. Rina. But it is really fascinating where we are, where we're going. I went up today to see my granny and sat by her graveyard, her headstone, and there's the plot right there where I will be. So I get to sit where I will lay next to her. And I'm thinking, I'm so different granny and but she's in me you know I'm in Leo the legacy is strong and we think about what where we've come from what we've learned what we've seen and then oh it's just we we have to just span out, span out into the big picture.

Yeah, I don't know where that came from. I think it's the permission to change. We are meant to change, we are meant to evolve, and we are in the pursuit of change. Now, obviously motivated to change the number on the scale, but it's so much more than that. I think sometimes people need permission to change. And, you know, I was thinking in prep for today,

the one thing that was so loud in me was Dr. Beverly, exactly as you just said, that's spanning out, that we can get so fixated on the number or on like this day or this meal or this tweak. But like there is a beautiful world, my god it doesn't feel like that right now, but you take four steps into whatever the nearest natural area is to you. If you live anywhere where it's been winter and there's like a touch of melting, it's not minus 15 billion anymore,

or like a hot minute, the flash of a red cardinal, or whatever the kind of local, you know, migratory bird is where you are, like it's coming, it's coming, there's a really beautiful bigness. And if we get super stuck in the small moment, we can help ourselves remember I love that the bigness of ancestry. I love that. And the bigness of actually existence. I know that we're really spanning mortality, we're getting into some existential territory here.

So again, whoa. But I mean, really like you brought up the autop, like what our insides are. This is gone deep. They're gonna find so many chiases. They went inside. But it can help if we are to get us out of the stuckness in the minutiae to remember, I love it, span out.

Span out. So, and we provide that in many ways, community. Like if you think about it in an ecosystem way, okay, who can I reach out to? How can I get in touch with my local neighborhood? How can I, I mean, people, you know, join meditation groups around the world. Like I get a bit bigger. I'm gonna get in touch with my, you know, join meditation groups around the world, like, I get a bit bigger. I'm going to get in

touch with my, you know, I'm going to take a look at family tree. There are lots of ways that we can access those bigger circles than this really hard day, or this really hard moment in a program that's asking us to really look inward. Yeah, well, as you are, you know, as your body is getting smaller, you're expanding and taking up more space in the world. Right?

I heard the birds chirping this morning. There's this one fucking bird. It's just like, it makes this, I can't even describe it. And it's so fucking annoying. And I heard it today. And at first I was like, oh, there's that fucking bird. But then I reminded myself, I haven't heard that bird for a while. And first I was like, Oh, there's that fucking bird. But then I reminded myself, I haven't heard

that bird for a while. And that bird is like, Okay, spring is coming. And I was like, All right, bird. Okay, I hear you like, changes come in spring is coming. Ladies, thank you so much. I you know, I could sit here and talk to you all day. But I'm sure you know, what? Got it. Oh, down. It's over? Gina, what? I've got to go. How do you do it? It's too fun. Dr. Brode, what time is it where you are? 3 p.m. Oh, 3 p.m.

3 p.m. And the horses are just walking around. I'll show you out the window. You can't see it, but the horses just came to say hello and then off they went. Oh my gosh. Are we looking at a Welsh ultra? Like it's so beautiful. It's green. We haven't seen green here for like six to eight months. Look at that. My mum asked, said, are the snowdrops out in Canada? I was like, Mom, nope, they are not. It will be a few months. So I always bugging Gina, like, you know, this pool party from three years ago that we're still waiting for an invitation for, scrap it. We're going to Wales party. We're going to Wales. I love it. And I love you ladies. Thank you so much for taking the time for me today. What have we got going on? I know you always have something

going on. You got any courses that people can look into? Any things they can sign up for? And so they can get more of you? What you got going on? My sleep course, my CBTI and spore insomnia is halfway through, so I will have to let you know when the next session will begin, probably in about a month's time. Calming your anxious brain, lots of interest, which is so lovely, so I think I am going to do a Saturday morning. So go ahead and go over to the website or Instagram Dr. Beverly and let me know if you're interested and then once the date is set I will write to you and I'll see you there. So that would be lovely. Amazing. That's Dr. Beverly on Instagram or yourpsychologycenter.ca

if you want to reach out to her. Dr. Dina, what you got going on? I'm going to take all of Dr. Beverly's offerings. That's so rad. Yeah, I mean, it's so great. So many, so many like Team Gina come to my learning stuff because they've all got, they've all got kids who aren't doing their homework. Like that's my jam. And educators, there's so many teachers. So there's two things you can do. One is I run this five week learning strategy series called the Essentials. I am so into this because it, you know, learning strategies are never taught in teachers education programs.

They're not showing up in the classroom. And that's my like, but I want if you show a learner how to manage their time, prioritize, take notes, study efficiently, they can sleep better, they feel better, they do better. So we're midway through, but I am committed to accessibility. So it doesn't matter to like join, and I'll send you the recording in the deck, like there is no beginning or end. And the next time I run this is in October. So come. So helpful across the learner. So if you've got a kid in grade seven,

if you got a, if you're like first year college or university, anywhere you're trying to learn anything, come and then I've got some March offerings, trying to think about what students are worried about. And there are three things I really want to get in there. So one is note taking, what do I write down when someone is talking? The answer is not everything. So one is note taking. What do I write down when someone is talking? The answer is not everything. The answer is not everything. Stop trying to type when everything that a teacher is not helpful. Number two is I'm nervous that I'm not a good writer. I'm

worried about writing. So writers block writing anxiety. One of my strategists is going to do a great session on learning strategies for writing. And then the third one is math anxiety. I'm worried about my math test. I don't want to study math. I'm not doing. So we're doing a learning strategy trio to try to like get in there and ease some worries. So those are two offerings. And all the beautiful Gina humans can have a discount. Yeah, look at that. Jodi and Brennan.

Gina 25. Gina 25. I love that. I love to save money. Everyone is probably furiously writing down every word that you ladies have said today. You can rewatch this segment. We will post it in the guides. You can also download and listen by way of the Living Method podcast as well. Thanks for everyone who joined us live today, listening after the fact. And of course ladies I know you're going to be back in the program again because we are far from done. Lise I hope you are. You are. Yeah yeah you'll be back. We got to continue this conversation. So much more to talk about like all of our conversations it's just about bringing

awareness. Hopefully I know you've had some aha moments. Have an amazing rest of your day everyone and we'll see you next time. Thanks ladies, I love you. Bye. Let's take a minute to hear from our podcast sponsor today because this new year, why not let Audible expand your life by listening? Kind of like what you're doing right now. So you can explore audiobooks, podcasts, even exclusive audible originals that are no doubt going to inspire you but more so motivate you. All you have to do is open up the app, tap into your well-being

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