The Livy Method Podcast - Why You Sabotage Yourself Right Before the Finish Line

Episode Date: June 15, 2026

You were doing everything right. Then you started getting close to your goal and something in you hit the brakes. Sound familiar? In this episode, Gina Livy gets into the real reason so many women sabotage their progress right when it matters most. It's not weakness. It's fear of what reaching your goal actually means, of who you'll have to become, of what you'll run out of excuses for. She also gets into what to do when the people around you aren't cheering you on and sometimes aren't even trying to hide it.This episode aligns with day 57 of our Spring 2026 weight loss program. You can find the full video hosted at: www.facebook.com/groups/livymethodspring2026To learn more about The Livy Method, visit livymethod.com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I'm going to be honest with you, this podcast is unapologetically a hot mess because that is what midlife feels like sometimes. Why, though? And how do we make it better? Do we all just need facelifts and gLP ones? I mean, let's talk about it. No bullshit, no wellness wankery here because we're trying to make real change and change is hard. But we're in this together. Welcome to the Livy Method podcast.

Hello, it is Monday. How are you doing? How are you doing? How are you feeling? What's going through your mom? mind. Where are you at? I mean, these are the kinds of questions, right? Like, I have goals, things I want to accomplish. And some days I feel like I'm doing a lot and I'm like, okay, I got this. And other days, I'm like, oh, my God, what am I doing? Sometimes I'm sabotaging myself.

Right. Like, I'm trying to get healthy. I'm trying to get fit. I'm trying to like look and feel my best. And, you know, some days I make choices that are the quite opposite of that. But I keep showing up and I keep going. Why? Because I know that I can do this. I know that I can do this. What makes it hard is life. Life makes it hard. The things we have to do, work on, work through, the things that are happening to us, to our friends, to our loved ones.

What's going on in the world? It all makes it very complicated. Like life is short, but at the same time can be really long and we do not want to spend any of that time focusing on our weight any more than we need to. This is about getting it done. Let's get it done. What do you need to do in order to get this done? Now, it's also complicated to get summers here, right?

Like summer's here. I was at a cottage this weekend. We want to eat the chakouturie board. We want to drink the wine. We want to have fun. All of that, right? Like hashtag so worth it. Had the best weekend.

Feel like absolute fucking garbage. But here I am today. And then you just have to keep going. The problem is if you spend any time in the diet industry, you have this very punishing, restrictive mindset where you indulge. And so now you have to starve yourself all day, every day for like the next week. In fact, it has the exact opposite reaction on us, right? So it's all about how do you just continue to show up?

How do you just continue to show up? So this is where you might be, what's my plan for this summer with this program? Am I going to be hardcore for the next, you know, five weeks that we have left? Am I going to show up every day and do something that's going to get me one step closer to my goals? am I just going to be really happy to maintain? Am I expecting the weight to move, but I'm showing up in a way that I'm maintaining my weight, right? Like wanting to see the scale move every day and so disappointed that it's not,

but at the same time not doing anything to get it to move. And that's okay if your plan and your mindset is, I'm really happy if I can just maintain at this point, right? If you would normally gain weight during the stressful time of your life, if you would normally gain weight throughout the summer, perhaps it's a value to just be able to maintain and sustain your weight. But you cannot expect the scale to move every day, but not be doing the things that you need to do to get it to move, right? So it's all about that mindset matching your actions. So I, and I'm getting into this, maybe it's a little intense for Monday,

but I'm getting into it because I love a good start on a Monday. I love a good start of Monday. But what was going through your mind this Monday? Was it like, oh, I'm just going to start myself today to catch up for what I did on the weekend? The fuck is that going to work for you? Never did. Never will. So, okay, that's not the right mindset. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.

I have a lot more work to do on my mindset. You still have a diet mentality mindset. You're going to continue to sabotage yourself because it's really about not just losing weight, understanding why you're making the choices that you are making, but also, making changes that you're going to be able to maintain and sustain. Like really owning this new version of yourself, right? This new version of yourself who wants to go away, make the choices to drink and eat and all of those things, have the best time.

You want the mindset that goes along with it. Yep, I did that. That was fun. Hashtag worth it. Today's a new day. Let me help my body recover from the weekend. And that's what you were doing. Get back to drinking my water.

get back to taking my supplements, get back to eating good nutrient rich foods, tell my body, hey, we got all this good food coming in. So no need to, you know, store that fat. No need to store that fat. So that's what we're doing. We're helping the body focus on fat loss. Okay, just something to think about this week. We are back to feeding the metabolism. So bringing it back to satisfaction. What did you learn this week? And then splitting up the meals and snacks for the end of the week. And then next week, next week I'm excited. for our week. It's going to make it so much easier for you to navigate the summer because there's so much flexibility in the tweak that we have coming down the pipeline next week. You might be saying,

well, Gina, why can't we do that this week? Because there's a rhyme and a reason and science behind everything that we are doing. Let me get into where you guys are at today. Hello, hello, hello. I like when you kick my ass on a Monday. I'm here for it. I'm here, right? Like, let's get in the, I love that you're here. You are either here or you're not here. And the reality is so many people are not here. They drop off. They go into that, oh, you know what, it's summer. I'll just start again later. I'll just whatever. This is hard. I'm bored. I'm whatever. In order to reach your goals, you have to keep following through. You have to keep showing up. And at this point, what's so brilliant about it, whether this is your first program or 21st program, this is where your, your body wants

this fat conscious as much as you do. It's just trying to, with everything you got going on, stay focused on it, right? Stay focused on it. Good morning. Hi, Ruth. Back from two weeks vacation, I only went up two pounds. That's great. So getting back to my routine and have confidence the scale will go down. That's exactly it. That's exactly it. And normally your weight, especially if you fly, I don't know if you flew anywhere, but your weight would be up two pounds just from flying, change of routine bowel movements. I know about you whenever I go away and my bowel movements are always off, right? And then is that routine. Sometimes it's a stress, lack of sleep, all those things, you can actually gain two pounds of fat. It's just like what your weight is

registering. And then, yeah, it'll calm back down again. Non-scale victory. I did a lot of stales the other day and was okay, not sore and outer breath. Yeah. Yeah. Don't forget to enter our giveaway. So we have partnered with Revolution Her, which is really cool. This is a company that highlights and sells women's products. They have a couple stores. I don't know if you've been to one of our pop-ups. We're actually gone. and I did a whole night where we hung out, we did a little bit of talk. I absolutely adore them, and they're all about women in business for such a good cost. We're partnering with Revolution Her, and we're going to be giving away tons of free products,

obviously, that are from women businesses. So all you have to do to win one of three prize packs, or $250, is tell us your favorite non-scale victory. I don't think non-scale victories are something that we've talked enough about, each round, each live session, which is interesting because each live session kind of has its own theme and kind of like, I don't know, like recurring things we talk about. We have not talked a lot about non-scale victories in this session. And non-scale victories, of course, all the other things besides what's going on on the scale, right? So I love that. Hi, MJ, I'm doing great,

but then every time I hit a new low, I sabotage a little. Yes, right? That's what we have the post for you today. At least I keep hitting my lowest low this round. I think it's the heavier weights I've been lifting. Who am I? Yeah. Who exactly? Exactly. Who are you? You should be changing and evolving. The way you lived your life, you were a byproduct of that. Right. So this is why we cannot go back to the way you were living your life before. You have to actually make change in your life that not only helps you lose weight, but it's going to help you be able to maintain and sustain your weight. You have to own it. This is one of the things we talk a lot about in maintenance, is really learning to trust that you can keep your weight off, learning to trust when to eat, what to eat,

how much to eat, and owning who you are now. And it's called automatic. This is one of the, one of the weeks that we focus on in maintenance is called automatic. And this is where it's becoming so automatic. You ask the four questions so often that you don't really have to. to ask them anymore because it's just you automatically in your mind without going one, two, three, four, you just kind of are in tune with it. It happens within seconds, right? And this is, this is kind of owning that. Who are you? So what is the sabotage about? What is this set? What's under the sabotage? So if you could think about, so one of the things, one of the ways people sabotage them is rewarding themselves by food. Well, I did so great. The scale is down this week. So I'm going to have

this treat. But then you really. the treat didn't really make you feel better. If the treat made you feel worse, then that's not really rewarding yourself. So what can you do to reward yourself? Indulgent. What can you indulge in? If it's the indulgence of the food, you want to indulge in something, celebrate yourself, in what other ways can you do that? In what other ways can you do that, right? Food gives us that dopamine hit we're excited yay ass we're celebrating what's your relationship with food i yay me i'm going to have this right so yay me what can what can you have that isn't going to work against you reaching your goals but i i would go deeper than that i would go deeper than that i would be like okay what's this what is this

sabotage about like what is it why do you keep doing that to yourself like what is going on there is it a feeling you're trying to mask is it a thought you're trying to mask is it a fear Is it a, like, are you, are you, what is, are you like, you've worked really hard at reaching this goal, really fucking hard. Really hard. Okay. So you reach it and then what? In, in, in, in, in, in, in, in what way are you afraid your life is going to change?

And, and I say this because people have this goal of losing weight, reaching their goal. And this is like, I'm going to reach my goal. And, but they also have, when I reach my goal, I'm going to start dating. I'm going to quit my job. I'm going to start. business, I'm going to whatever, I'm going to think, I'm going to think. Right? So they don't know they do this, but over the years you've been doing this. When I lose my weight, I'm going to. And the problem is that when you get close to reaching your weight, you also have the weight of all those other things

that you said you were going to do. And sometimes that can really weigh on people. Like, maybe you're just not ready to date. Maybe you know what I mean? It's not your weight. Maybe you're not ready for this. Maybe you're not ready or maybe you're scared to do this or scared to do that. So a lot of times it's what reaching your goal represents because we've added so much more weight to losing our weights. So that's where you've got to figure out because the chances are if you're sabotaging yourself in this, you're also sabotaging yourself in your life in other ways. And a lot of it is just fear. Mine is like fear of like not being able to do it. I have fears of of like not actually I make a decision and then it doesn't work right um I'm so confident in my choices

but like what happens if I'm actually wrong oh my god will I be able to trust that um fear of it being taken away that's my thing because I've been in a relationship or situation where every time things went really well something I I lived with a sabotageur and so the minute things went well, they didn't feel worthy. My ex-husband was abused when he was a child. And so whenever he felt safe or whenever he felt like things were good, he would like sabotage them. And it took me a long time to get rid of that feeling of the shoe dropping, but I still functioned from that place. Right? I'm still struggling with being worthy myself. You know, I was raised by a dad that unless you were first, you were a loser. You know?

never praised me for anything to this day. And yeah, so all of that collectively is constantly in my mind when I'm making choices and decisions to do the things. But I want you to grab the feeling of like, God, you know you can do this. Of course you can do this. You can do this. You just to keep showing up. You have to fight for it. You have to do it long enough. You have to not give up. And so the thing about weight loss that I see is probably many of you listening now, but trying to lose your weight for like 10, 20, 30 years. You've been trying to lose your weight for 10, 20, 30 years. The only reason you haven't reached your goal yet is the fucking diet industry screwed you over

with its calories and versus calories out crap. Yes, it helps you lose weight. Tanks your metabolism every single time and makes it harder for you to lose weight each time and is impossible to maintain just by the way you're losing the weight. Right? This is like the big debate out there. Calories and versus calories. No one is debating their dynamics.

No one is debating that it doesn't work. It doesn't work for maintaining the state in your weight. It's this hardship. It's continuing to show up every day and work through your thoughts and your feels. That's it. That's the stuff you got to work on, you know? Good morning. For once in my life, I'm happy with this three-week plateau.

Love that. This program is incredible. I'm at three pounds to my goal and I'm okay with a plateau. I'm adjusting, enjoying, and not beating myself up while sailing this plateau. Yes, I love this. Every minute on a plateau is your body adjusting to your new weight, making your new weight, your new norm, creating your new set point. Your set point can go up.

Your set point can go right back down. Set point is a learned behavior. Your body is learning to adjust to this weight, that this is safe to release this fat, and it's going to adjust all of your hormones around this new weight. Your hormones are always in flux. Your hormones are never balanced, but your hormones do adjust to how you are living, right? Larger portions, insulin resistance, leptin resistance, your body adjust, right? And so now what's happening is as you release the fat, your body adjust to create a new set point around your new weight. So this is why you do. You want and you need plateaus. But we're taught that plateaus are like just means that what

you're doing isn't working when it's so, it's so not even true. Love that for you. I love that for you. That's a whole lot. That's when you know your brain is changing. People's comments seem to be the catalyst to self-sabotage for me. Hi, Don. This weekend, I was asked by a friend who has never struggled with weight while how much smaller are you planning to get people suck like what the fuck it's so fucked up how much smell are you planning on getting i don't know how much more of a fucking bitch are you planning on being fuck off what a weird question you know my new thing is just like wow that's a weird fucked up thing to say it's so fucked up it's so fucked up I just, you know what I've just had it? I just, honestly, I'm so done.

There's this thing happening right now on the internet where everybody's like, nah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, just, God, shut up. Shut up, right? This weekend I had to, I was asked by a friend who has never struggled with weight. Well, I can't even read it, Don. It's so absurd. What a weird thing to say. Well, how much, she's just jealous. What's her problem? How much smaller are you going to get? How much healthier are you going to be?

Oh my God. How much happier are you going to be? You're going to get happier? Sorry. Oh my God. What a fucking bitch. It was a bit. I also, you know, I have this thing where I always take someone else's side. Like, I try to see it from both sides. Like, what's her problem? She's obviously just, because she's never had a weight issue doesn't mean she's not insecure, right? You know what I mean? Also, just because she doesn't have a weight issue doesn't mean she has her own issues. It was a bit snotty. Like I was threatening her domain. Yes. Yes. Maybe if you're friends, you've always been her fat friend and that's her measure of success, right? And you're threatening her because you are no longer that friend. Well, at least. I'm not her. Oh, well, she does this. Or do you know what I mean? In comparison, people just naturally

compare. And so probably being around you made her feel better. And you're threatening that. You're threatening who she is in her existence. Because you know what? Your personality is probably a million times better than hers. It was a bit snooty. Like I was threatening her domain. Well, I plan to keep going into my belly. Fat is acceptable to me. Stay in your lane, friend. Yeah. Yes. Here's Paula. I have the friend who is small and always comments on how big she is when clearly she isn't. I am. It's frustrating. I agree. Stay in your own line. Yeah. And this is just kind of like, wow, you need some serious self-awareness. Like, yeah, you know, I was with some friends on the weekend. And one of them is like, she just, she's like, you know, I just don't let people get away with that. She just says whatever she wants. And like, doesn't, like, I'm, I'm like, do you, girl? And I was like, I love her for that. Like, if someone says something offside for her, she's like, no, no, no, that you, that's not, it's so inappropriate. You can't say that. Like, what do you mean? And she's like so calm about it. And then she'll actually, like,

sit there and have a conversation with them. And like, she goes the extra mile to, like, I don't know, try to reform them from their bad behavior. And I'm God, she does God's work. I swear, she does God's work. I'm not interested in that. But yeah, I'm just like, no. No, you know what's happening to is that you cannot do this kind of work and not have it change the energy you are putting out. Like, it might not have been, Don, how much smaller you're going to get. How much more confident are you going to get? You know? How much more fun are you going to be? Like, you feel confident in your body, you are bringing different energy to the table. What you are putting out there is different. You're not the same person you were. The work that you are doing to be self-aware, to be in tune,

continuing to show up, to fight yourself, to feel worthy, all of those things is changing who you are. So it is not just changing the size of your body. It is changing the energy you're showing up in the world with. That is probably more what's making her uncomfortable. than your actual size of your body. She just cannot articulate that, right? A yoga instructor is here. Got to go. Bye, Sue.

Have a great day. Lost 14 pounds on the program. Jennifer, I love this for you. I love this for you. Five weeks. Five weeks we have for a push, right? You want to finish just as strong as you started.

That's the plan here. Literally, I had two chips and dip them in a hell of good dip and was up from, was up with heartburn. Yeah. Yeah, that is a good feeling knowing a tiny bit of the plan makes me feel sick. Fit in my smallest pants. I had a hard time fitting into last summer. It's a win. Yeah. So before what happened is your body gets in this kind of, like, and you're so out of tune and disconnected that your body is not even telling you how bad you feel when you have these foods. And I've had people say this forward, your diet ruined me. I can no longer eat this. I can no longer eat that. No, my diet didn't ruin you. What happened is you got in tune, your body started communicating with you and letting you know that shit makes you feel like shit. It always did. But you were probably feeling

just ugh all the time and so disconnected that your body wasn't being clear about letting you know how those foods were affecting you. And this is your body working for you. And this is what I mean by this is why being being able to trust. When we have to trust, when do you eat what to eat? People feel like, oh, if I just let my body make all the decisions, it's just going to eat chips and dip and brownies and ice cream and whatever. It's really not. Your body doesn't actually want any of those things. Now, the next layer of that is alter processed foods, which are created to be addicting, right? This is why it's hard to eat just one chip because these foods literally are meant for you to just not be able to stop eating. They're addictive foods. They are addictive foods. So it's out.

when you can minimize your addictive foods and you're just giving your body to all this good nutrient rich foods, your body's quite happy and content with that. And then it starts to feel really good. Like, look how great you felt in the first couple of days of the program and you made change. And you just got to keep that going. It's got to be like, you're just building and building and building and building and building on that. And that's how you're in tune. And what you're going to be able to do is look at those chips in that dip and no. Before you even eat it, you're going to be like, all right, I can feel the heartburn all right. already. Sometimes we still choose to have it, right? That's the consequence of it. I can look at a ball of wine and I already feel how crappy I feel, you know, but sometimes I still have it. So that's,

that's being in tune. And this is where your body is working for you, not against you. And that's where the process gets easier in a sense as you go because you become more in tune. And it's, it helps you. So you as you continue to rewire your brain and understand food noise and like, for example, constantly be thinking out food noise in a way that you have to eat. So food noise generally is around not eating. Oh my God, what am I going to eat? Whatever, knowing that I can't eat. Right. But now you're constantly thinking about good, nutrient rich foods, how to fuel your body, and you have to eat that next piece, like almost calms your mind and almost makes you anti like, ah, I got to eat again. Which is the complete opposite. So you're rewiring your brain. You're rewiring

your body, you're rewiring your relationship and your connections with food, right? So, love that. Love that. Love that. Love that. The living method teaches you to no longer accept being comfortable in the uncomfortable. Yeah, it's no longer working for you. Once your body gets a taste of feeling really good or once you have that aha moment mentally, you realize this is not working for me. The way I was living is not working for me. And so this will have happen. You will dip back into coping mechanisms and be like, oh, that's not working for me. Right? You'll recognize, this is why we want to talk about self-sabotage. When you recognize the behavior, you're like, oh, shit. You know, that's what that's what the self-awareness piece is.

The hardest issue is cutting back on my wine. Other than water, what can I enjoy in the evening while taking a break from caregiving stressors? Something I can enjoy in a wine glass so I can feel relax. So this was me. This is me. This is me. Right, Trudy. So one of the things, I find drinking anything in a wine glass. Like, I drink my water in a wine glass. Like, believe it or not, it's just the holding of the wine glass for me. You could do soda water, put some soda water in there. There are some non-alcoholic drinks. They tend to be really high in sugar. But I find just kind of like putting something in a wine glass. So when I wasn't drinking for that like long period of time that I went, let's say I went to an event and they were serving wine. I would actually just say, can you put my wine? Can you put water in my

wine glass? Sometimes they'd be like, well, that's a wine glass. I'm like, I know. I'm not drinking, but I would like a wine glass. And I just found like it, I'm not really, when I'm drinking, what I realized is like I'm not sitting there just pounding it back, like dinner with a nice glass of wine, a way it complements the food. usually if I'm drinking at a event or a party or something like that, I'm just, you know, kind of like holding it and then sipping it. It's not really, it's like sipping, talking, sipping, talking. And it wasn't really ever about the wine, you know. I was out this weekend. And I was like, I had like a spritzer or something. We know those vodka cottage drinks or something. Someone's like, you want to drink? And I'm like, sure. And they're like, what do you want?

I'm like something cold. Like I just, I didn't even want. And I was just like, oh, I'm cold because I've been carrying it for an hour and it's warm. Yeah. So, or pot water with some lemon and lime in it. But soda water is always really great because it's kind of like bubbly or whatever. But that was kind of like, it wasn't, a lot of times would I realize it wasn't actually the drinking of the wine. It was the holding the wine, what the wine glass represented for me.

time for myself sitting quietly socializing kind of whatever that is um it gets or when i if it's if it's like the the should i have wine should i not have wine what really worked for me was like taking a minute to feel how like sitting myself i can have wine if i want how am i going to feel tomorrow how am i going to feel tomorrow. And I can immediately feel I get slightly depressed, super dehydrated. I just feel tired. I'm just like, it's a certain feeling when I drink wine and bloated. Oh my God, I get bloated for a week. So I focus on that and that makes it a lot easier for me. I see I see you guys are giving all sorts of suggestions for that. Cambocha is great too. Just watch kombucha is great because it's got a little busy thing. Just watch the sugar in kombucha. Watch the sugar in that.

You guys are all talking about that. The other day I bumped into a former colleague coming out of the grocery store. She gave me a not so genuine smile and gave my body a quick eye scan. You know that quick once over body scan? Yeah. I absolutely hate it when women do that. It is like she was on automatic pilot. When will none of us care about that anymore?

What a world the diet industry created. It really did. it really did create this kind of like measuring people up by and you can't win you can't win you can't win right people look you up and down if you gained weight people look up and down if you lose weight um yeah it's a little it's you know what that is that's lack of evolution in your mind that's that's her lack of evolution in her mind that's also not keeping her energy at herself she's She's judging. Here's what I can guarantee.

She is so hard on herself. She is constantly judging herself all the time. And that's why she's putting her energy out there trying to judge other people because that is what she's doing to herself. Right? Like, you know, I don't judge it. I don't got time for anybody else. I don't judge other people.

I'm just, because I don't want to judge myself. Might you want to be easier on yourself, be easier on other people. I make all, there's a difference between observations, right? I observe other people, but I'm more like a, yeah, you do you. So somebody said something the other night and it was so like fucked up that I just was like, I just looked at them and I was like, okay, I'm going to go. I just, yeah, I think you just, when you just don't have time, like, don't make time for it. Because like whatever you put out there is what, you know, that's the thing.

And I think when you do this kind of work, you start to see other people's, you start to see. You're observing other people's behaviors in a sense of what works for me and what doesn't work for me. And that kind of behavior does not work for me. And so also this is where I think your tolerance. You just, when you're confident in yourself, you just don't have tolerance for that for other people. And this is where you might find yourself all of a sudden maybe saying something. Hey, Susan. The fuck you're staring at.

What fuck it's up with you? You okay. You're all right. I just, I'm the same. I've had it. I just am so done. I'm so done. Life is way too short to be worrying about other people's bullshit.

it. I just want to be calm and confident myself. Go for the things that I want to go for, do what I want to do, you know, and just like, just not have fucking time for any of it. But that's that work. That's why being in tune, self-aware, what's going on your mind? What is this feeling about? How'd that make you feel? So what was the message that she was trying to send to you? Right. Because if someone does something, said something, shouldn't bother you at all unless there's something resonating about that with you. So that's where I always go like, God, she's a fucking bitch. But wait a sec. What was it that they said that, like, bothered me? Is there, is there truth in that? And sometimes it's not the obvious thing. Sometimes it's just like, I just, you know what,

why didn't I say something? Not that it wasn't true. That not like, oh, is it true? Am I this? No, that's not actually it. What bothers me about this is I didn't fucking say anything. Why didn't I say anything. Why didn't I say anything? Oh, because I was afraid if I didn't, if I did say something, then what? Like, that's sort of my process for that, especially if it's something that I continue to think about over and over a situation that happened. I'm like, okay, I can't let this go. I keep thinking about it. And so what is the, what is the message in there? What's, what's the lesson learned there for me, right? I think people like to see me, heavy.

I was always tiny. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Or they like, or they like how you are when you're tiny, when you're heavy. They like how you are. Maybe, right? Um, I was always tiny. Then my partner of 13 years cheated on me and I hid to save his reputation. Hit it to save his reputation. Then he did it again with a married woman and he hung out with her and her husband. I, left him thinking he would come to his senses, but he was with her already. She just played with her husband, and now those assholes are engaged to each other. Sounds like they deserve each other. And then guess what?

They're both going to cheat on each other. That's how it goes. That's how it goes. Binge eating is a result of the trauma of it all, and I think I need a heavy bag to hit it. Yeah. You need to go to like one of those, you know those places where you just grab a bat and you beat shit out? You need to let it out. I was just with girlfriends on the weekend and we were on the lake and we screamed and shouted

and danced and laughed till we literally fell on the ground because we could not hold ourselves up anymore. We looked fucking ridiculous, but it was so therapeutic to be like, just like, ugh. I don't want it anymore. Fuck this shit. Like you're holding all of that. You're holding his her stuff, you are letting their life interfere with your like, fuck the both of them. You don't want either one of them in your lives. You got to let them go so you can turn the page and open up to a whole new world where you let you, this is you. You got to find you and your energy so that you're putting that out. That's the energy that you are putting out there. Talk about the energy, your vibe attracts your tribe. And your vibe is still attract to those losers.

You know what I mean? Let them have each other. Let them have each other. Oh, it's so gross. It is so gross. Let them have each other. You know, like let it go. Let it glow. They did that to you because you fucking deserve better. That's why that was done to you. This is the universe having your back. This is the universe working for you, not against you. The universe is like, girl, I am going to save your ass. This is not. You know, wrong direction, wrong direction. Turn around. Let's go. Right. Like, this is your detour. This is your big sign. I think some, you're like me. Right? Like, I hold on. I make it work. I make it work. I make it work. I make it work. I make it work. I make it work. I make it work. Until something. really big fucking happens that it gives me no choice. The universe is like, girl, you're not going to fucking do this, are you? So let me create something really fucking huge to get you,

to get your head under your fucking ass and make a different decision. And always when I do it, and my mom's always like, what, Gina? It took you so long. Tony's like, Gina, what took you so long? My friend, Sonia, what took you so long? Well, what took me so long is I had this thing where I try to put myself in other people's shoes. I try to make things work. I try to be a good person and, you know, at my expense. It sounds like you're trying to do the same, like staying with him, saving his ass, not saying anything. I did this also with my kids to try to protect my kids. My, you know, my kid's dad was like, you know, he did some stuff. But also I knew he was sick. I knew their time was limited and I didn't want them to, I sheltered them from the truth and reality

of who he was and the things that he's done. and why our relationship fell apart. And then I remember there was a time where they were like, why can't you be more like dad and blah, blah, blah. And I was like, for fuck's sake, let me tell you about your dad. And I just unleashed it all. And then they were all like, oh, well, we didn't know that.

We didn't know that. And that changed my relationship with them. And like me trying to shelter, you trying to shelter his friends, his family, the kids, whatever from his reality. No, because you got to let him go. You can't uphold him anymore. You can't uphold him anymore. Because at some point, his true colors are going to show. And that's his thing. It's not yours anymore. You almost need to like do a literal disconnection. Right. What's mine is mine. What's yours is yours.

You guys can have that or. And now I'm going to. So what are you going to do about the fact that you are binge eating to handle your feels? Okay, so let's go into your feels. Like, fucking tell people. Tell people how fucking pissed off you are, how shitty you are. If you don't want to tell them, write a fucking letter. Get it out. Be like, this is shit. It sucks.

You're mad at it. You're upset at it. You wasted your life with this guy. Right? Like, whatever that is. And then you've got to be like, time to turn the page. And there might not, there might be still time. so you're like, oh, you know what I mean? You're grieving what you thought your life was going to be.

You're grieving what you thought not telling anyone would do. You're grieving, you know what I mean? So grieve that, but come on. What do you want out of your life? What do you want out of your life? Right? Right now you're putting that in a binge sack, right? Like let's, what can we, rather than do that, what can we do to pull you up and move you forward? word. Like, what's one thing you can do today? Call a friend. Be like, hey, can I share something with you? You know? Um, go to a, go for a walk. Put on your, put on a like, ragey, I don't know, um, playlist. Dance it out. Shake it out. Right. Make a list of the things that you want to do in your life, how you want to feel in your life, right? Like that, this is like, and you know what? This is part of your

weight journey because you are carrying that weight. You were carrying that weight. This is everything to do with your weight loss journey. Everything to do with your fucking weight loss journey because this is about creating a new life for yourself, right? Creating a new life for yourself. New routines, new habits, new way of thinking, new choices. Because you were a product of that. Now you need to be like, okay, who do I want to be? You get to start open. Who do you want to? Who do you want? to be? Right? Like, what does that look like? In your mind, when you feel it, who do you want to be? And then what are the behaviors that you need to adopt in order to be that person? Right. It's so easy to want to hold on to and you are so hurt, you physically want to feel the hurt or you don't

want to feel the hurt because you're trying not to feel the hurt. Feel the fucking hurt. Feel it. go into it, fucking feel that shit, and then be like, okay, what's my plan now to move forward? Reclaim my life. Make my life mind. Because right now you're living a life that's about theirs. And you deserve so much more. This is very much about your weight loss journey. This is feeding your soul. This is making choices that work for you. This is like, that's like dig your heels into this, right? Physically making choices and make you feel good. mentally making choices that make you feel good, right? That's what it's about. It's the weight, all the extra weight that you are carrying on top of the weight that you

are carrying is usually the work. It's usually the work, you know? I can give you a big hug. You are loved and you are safe and you are fucking amazing. That's it. Anyone who's here listening today, you have not given up on yourself. You're showing up for another day. You are intentional about let's get this shit done.

You're intentional about having a good day. You're intentional about reaching your goals. I can fucking love that shit. Let's go. Let's go. Tomorrow I have Amanda Thib. Someone's talking about menopause. That's post menopause.

Zero fucks to give anymore. Yeah. There's something that happens in your brain. You know, I was just talking to girlfriends. I'm like, I wish this would happen when I was younger. It would have made me a completely different person. But I digress. Here it is now.

And I think something happens to you in your brain where you're just like, yeah. Okay. Or maybe it's the fact that we, yeah, 50 fucking years of our lives have gone by. And I'm not going to do another 50 years worried about this or worried about that. Like, let's go. It's go time. Speaking of menopause, Amanda Theeb's going to join us tomorrow. She's like an advocate for women's health. She has written the book, Menopoclic. She's just, I love her. Talk about talent like it is. She's going to be joining us. Tomorrow at 9.m. So make sure you join us for that. Make sure you enter the giveaway. Tell us what's your favorite non-scale victory. You got to have one. What is it? Just add it to the post for your chance to win. Read that post on sabotage. It's a good one. I'm going to be back tonight at 7 p.m. We're going to do a little Ask Me Anything. So if you want to come hang out, have some fun and chat. I'm going to be there for that. Have a fantastic rest of your day and I'll see you later. Bye.