The Menstruality Podcast - 127: Wild Power #7: How to Enter the ‘Temple’ of Menstruation (Alexandra & Sjanie)

Episode Date: January 16, 2024

Welcome to our penultimate Wild Power conversation series. These ‘round-the-kitchen-table’ chats with Alexandra and Sjanie were first released when we published Wild Power: Discover the Magic of the Menstrual Cycle and Awaken the Feminine Path to Power. They unpack the book’s teachings through powerful, practical and funny real-life stories and examples. Episode seven is about how to enter what we call the ‘Temple’ of Menstruation. Inside each of us lies a hidden ‘temple’, a place of bliss, love and deep belonging and today we reveal how your menstrual cycle prepares you to enter this ‘temple’ each month at menstruation.In this episode you’ll:Discover how you’re wired for bliss, love and ecstasy when you bleedLearn how your menstrual cycle prepares you enter your inner temple at menstruationWhat you can do to get a full blast of this blessing---Registration is now open for our 2024 Menstruality Leadership Programme. You can explore the curriculum here: https://www.menstrualityleadership.com---The Menstruality Podcast is hosted by Red School. We love hearing from you. To contact us, email [e-mail]---Social media:Red School: @redschool - https://www.instagram.com/red.schoolSophie Jane Hardy: @sophie.jane.hardy - https://www.instagram.com/sophie.jane.hardy

Welcome to the Menstruality Podcast, where we share inspiring conversations about the power of menstrual cycle awareness and conscious menopause. This podcast is brought to you by Red School, where we're training the menstruality leaders of the future. I'm your host, Sophie Jane Hardy, and I'll be joined often by Red School's founders, Alexandra and Sharni, as well as an inspiring group of pioneers, activists, changemakers and creatives to explore how you can unashamedly claim the power of the menstrual cycle to activate your unique form of leadership for yourself, your community and the world. Hey, thank you for joining me today. Thank you for listening to the Menstruality Podcast. It's wonderful to be here with you. This is going to be the penultimate episode of the Wild Power Bonus Series, which was actually a series of eight conversations that Alexandra and Sharni had

back in the day when they first published their first book wild power and they've been sitting in an old folder and we realize that they're full of gold and we really want to share them with you and episode seven is about how to enter what alexandra and sharni call the temple of menstruation the thinking is that inside each of us not the thinking actually the lived experience of thousands and thousands of women and people who menstruate in our community is that inside each of us lies a hidden temple this place of love belonging even bliss and today alexandra and sharni explore how to enter this temple each month at menstruation. If this is a topic that you love, it's a real passion for me, then there are a couple of other

episodes that you can listen to. One is episode 124, the five chambers of menstruation and the second is episode 116, how menstruation holds Holds the Secrets for Successful Leadership. Just a little note, bear with the sound quality, it isn't as good as usual and also when these conversations were recorded it was before we embraced more inclusive language around the menstrual cycle so when Alexandra and Sharni say women, know that they're referring to women and everyone who menstruates. So let's get started with how to enter the temple of menstruation. Well, here we are again, Shani. Yeah. Talking about our favourite topic. topic and welcome all of you who have been listening with us thus far we absolutely love talking on this as you probably guessed by now and and thank

you also for all your wonderful comments it's just very heartening to read them isn't it Shani so it's so lovely, the emails we're being sent and the feedback we're getting about what your experiences are when you're listening to this and how it's impacting your relationship to your cycle and what that means for you. It's really lovely to hear, so thank you. Well, we've got a beauty of a conversation today, haven't we, Shani? Because we're going to be talking about the inner temple of menstruation. Yeah. The inner temple.

Yes, the inner temple. That is menstruation. Now, in last week's session, we were exploring the inner seasons of the cycle. And we're going to go into the inner winter today in great depth. And it's the inner winter that we're calling the inner temple of winning. And, you know, if we think about temples, what temples are about, they're the place where we honor the sacred, where we encounter the sacred. It's like this amplified energy field that allows us to have a more profound access to the sacred. And the most stunning thing for us as women is that we have this inner temple built into our beings. And not only that, we actually also have a call to the temple, and we'll talk about that later on.

There's a very distinct moment where you go, oh, it's time to down tools and head to the temple. So we're going to just flesh that out for you today. Now, of course, you can't enter the inner temple with your everyday consciousness. In fact, that real doing energy that we talk about, the via positive energy that we've talked about with you, that energy, if you turn up with that energy at the doorway to the temple, you're going to find the temple door is locked to you. But the cycle is magnificent in its wisdom. It prepares you to enter that temple.

It's like a breadcrumb trail that it lays down for you, clues alerting you that you're getting closer and closer to that door and if you're able to follow those clues you will be able to open the door to the temple in a graceful we hope way I mean of course it's always combined with the medicine of day-to-day living but you are prepared and that's what we're going to unpack first aren't we Shani I'm going to actually say to you now to pick up the breath of travel I was just listening to you with my eyes closed and as you were speaking about the inner temple I had this image in my mind of this safe zone right at the core of our being, this sacred safe zone that allows us to be held in and with our divinity. And I was imagining

our menstrual cycle like a spiral that was leading us, guiding us down, down, down into this temple. And that's exactly what's happening in our ordinary everyday life if we're paying attention to our cycle. Day by day, it's bringing us closer and closer to ourselves, and it's drawing us more and more deeply into our own being and inviting us to come into this inner temple. So I love this idea of a breadcrumb trail. I often think of Hansel and Gretel trying to find their way home and really having to track back through the dark through the mystery you know in the in in this kind of wild place to find their way back home and

yeah that's just what our menstrual cycle is doing for us. So this breadcrumb trail, there's there, I mean in a way the whole time your menstrual cycle is a breadcrumb trail to this safe zone, this core of your own being. But there's a very particular moment in the monthly round of the cycle where you will get a clear wake-up call that it's time to prepare, time to begin preparations for entering the inner temple. And it's that crossover moment from the high of summer into the territory of your inner autumn and you know the energy of the inner summer of our cycle is such that we are really out there and our attention is absorbed in what's going on around us, and we're not necessarily that deeply connected to our own needs, our own inner world, and it often comes with busyness and flurry and go, go, go, go, go, not always, but it can have that quality. And then there's this moment when the gears shift,

and it's a very distinct moment. If you're paying attention, even if you're not paying attention, you will get some tap on the shoulder telling you, hey, listen here, we ain't in summer anymore. Yes. You're mortal. Because I think of us, you know, as superwoman in the summer, and invincible, and then there's this, and you really do feel it, like, man, I could just do anything. And then there's that sudden moment, isn't it, where suddenly you go, ah, no, maybe I'm not invincible. There's a vulnerability that it's like suddenly the ground wobbles under you,

it's so distinctive. Suddenly the ground wobbles and you get this call to yourself, this call back to yourself, how am I, how am I doing? It's a little wake-up call to come back to your own needs and to start to feed yourself with attention and this this little tweak the cycle gives you, a little tweak of like, oh, are you still there? Are you still connected to yourself, to your needs? Are you still paying attention? And at one workshop we ran earlier this year, we joked about the cycle giving you a wake-up call at these very key crossover moments. And this is one of them, moving from summer into autumn. It's a really key crossover moment where your cycle is just tapping you on the shoulder and saying,

wait, are you paying attention? Are you awake? Or have you kind of lost yourself in unconsciousness? And sometimes that little wake-up call is not so small. It's more like I had a picture when you're talking about Superwoman Alexandra of Superwoman, you know, flying around, being really incredible, and then suddenly slipping on a banana peel and realizing that the ground wasn't quite as solid as she thought it had

been. That's a little whacking from your cycle. Yes, a little whack at that moment. And then, yes, it's the first kind of breadcrumb moment in our journey to the inner temple. And it's also just really announcing, it's announcing the arrival of the inner autumn and the fact is you can't afford to be unconscious as you come into those autumn powers because the autumn powers are so um strong they're they're of a kind of shamanic nature really there's deep forces that you start to feel into and so it's also kind of waking you up to be present to the energies that you now have to channel,

the powers you now have to channel in the autumn phase, and the tasks you have to meet, which are all, of course, connected to preparing you for the temple. So the kind of underlying theme of the inner autumn is increasing permeability. We are, in the first half of the cycle, we're sort of built up, and in the second half of the cycle we are just very gently undone, or sometimes not so gently, but the armoring starts to fall away, because we do accumulate, we can become a little bit armored in that summer season, and we need to be made more permeable, a little more tender to be able to cross that threshold into the temple.

So that's the underlying theme, isn't it, Tani, of the inner autumn, it's this increasing permeability and it's crucial to be practicing cycle awareness so you can feel how your being is just changing gear and you're dropping down into different kinds of powers. So increasing vulnerability. And then there's this kind of next break-run moment, Shani. Would you like to pick up the next thing where we have to sort of encounter

ourselves, don't we? We have to really face ourselves. Yeah, this process as you move through the inner autumn and this need to slow down is because, as you say, you're shedding layers and it's a bit like the veils are beginning to fall from your eyes and you're beginning to see the world and yourself more clearly. You have sight. Your intuitive, instinctual knowing wakes up and your capacity to really see things clearly starts to awaken. And with that, you begin to see your own shadow. You begin to see the places in yourself which are sticky or stuck or undigested. So this is the inner work of the premenstruum. And again, this is preparation. This is preparation for the temple.

This is opportunity to bring more of yourself to the temple. This is opportunity to bring more of yourself to the temple. And so you're beginning to have to take more responsibility, have to be accountable, have to speak up, speak your truth. You're really being called into your own authority again. I'd love to come in there, Shani, because the other thing that's happening there is you're building really strong psychological muscle to be present. You know, because if you're not present, you get thwacked. The critic will give you a really hard time. But if you can learn to face yourself, to meet that inner critical voice, you build this real sturdiness. You use that word, your authority.

It is that, isn't it? And you really grow a psychological muscle. You really develop an inner strength. And it's that inner strength that allows you to be a kind of channel, really, prepares you to receive the spiritual powers that are present in the inner temple. So it's really crucial, this stage, isn't it? Mm-hmm. And the other part of this psychological muscle that you're building is the muscle of discernment, which is in part about creating boundaries really for yourself and boundaries that are allowing more and more space for who you are to come through.

And it's the beginning of building that protection or that sacred space. Those boundaries are the first step in really carving out the space that you need to be able to enter your a temple. Hey, I'm going to pause the conversation for a moment to share another story from one of the graduates of our menstruality leadership program. The menstruality leadership program is a beautiful, immersive apprenticeship into the wisdom that lives within you, the menstruality wisdom that lives within you, the wisdom that you know in your blood and bones. And the graduate that we're hearing from today, Yasha, speaks really beautifully to this, that it's time for each of us to unashamedly claim the power of the menstrual cycle, the power of our cyclical nature, the power of menopause and use it to serve and stand for life itself to claim our own way of leading in the world.

So if you're interested in the course you can find out more at menstrualityleadership.com. We would absolutely love to have you with us. We're starting in March and I'll hand over now to Yasha to share some of her experience and then we'll be back with Alexander and Sharni to carry on the conversation. Hello, I am Jascha. I decided to join the MLP program based upon a pull within my being. I didn't have a clear end goal, but I simply allowed this pull within myself to take me on this initiatory journey. Through this program, I've redefined the word leadership as not something in how you lead others, but leadership now is how I lead myself. So the way they teach is something I'm very, very attracted to,

and I would say that it's two core foundations in the teaching. One is that we're equals, and the other is that it's experiential and I am trusted with and empowered with the knowing that I know this within myself. It's just a matter of being shown where and how it is. So if you're still deciding, I can only say that there's only win in this process. You will be empowered. You will be handed your own power to yourself. And there's a saying that you don't choose your master. your master chooses you and I feel this way about menstruality that you don't choose menstruality, menstruality chooses you. So if you feel this calling from your womb and from menstruality it's because you're ready

that's really beautiful what you're saying shani there and that's just so crucial this this is just pure gold really in preparation for the temple um and that discernment also is getting you to sort of which sort of moves us into the next point, which is about preparing the nest. You know, discernment, that discernment energy is all about what's in and what's out in your life. Yeah. Because again, you can't turn up at the door of the temple with clutter, whether that's psychological clutter or just all the stuff of one's life.

And so there is both a kind of inner sorting, isn't there? Like what's in and what's out, where your boundaries really are. You really discover your boundaries. But there's also all that outer preparation, you know, that whole cleaning thing that happens for us. I mean, it's a well-known phenomena with women who are going to give birth, that they go into this nesting thing and, you know, really get the space ready, but it happens premenstrually too, there's this flurry of activity, which, I mean, for me, it's just, I want things ordered, prepared,

packed away, in a way it's like stockpiling for the winter I want to make sure I've got all the food in that I need and that I'm not going to have to be dealing with all the washing that's still lying in a pile on my bed I want it packed away so I can have the physical space I need to be able to actually I mean I save all my cleaning for this time of the cycle once a month. Once a month, the great purge. You do get the surge. It is like a last-minute surge of energy to tie up loose ends and to, you know, finish off business and get things set up and ready. But Alexandra, as we're talking about this,

we're explaining this autumnal phase in quite a positive light, which of course it can be, but there is a whole other side to it, which I experience and many women experience, which is the real disturbance of this time, you know, feeling really out of control and reactive and full of, I mean, all kinds of things, full of rage and depression and anxiety. You know, a lot of women find this time really, really difficult. So how does that fit into this breadcrumb trail that we're describing? This is such a powerful question, Charlie. And we haven't got the time to go into it in huge depth,

but I'm going to just kind of really dream into the essence of what's going on. The first thing I want to say is that because we are not supported, because culturally this is not known what's going on. The first thing I want to say is that because we are not supported, because culturally this is not known what's going on, women aren't properly supported and women don't understand and they're not properly supported in this phase. And we're just having to handle so much and the real powers of this phase are not being respected. So there's that kind of tension of it not being respected,

and therefore often we're not knowing what's going on, so we're not able to pace ourselves, we're not able to follow the inner shifting energies of our body. Yeah. And it's that kind of tension between what our body is wanting, our inner world is wanting to do, and what our outer world is demanding of us, that is fundamentally, I feel, at the root of it.

And then sort of beneath all that, I mean, I think of some of that rage that comes out for women. Now, that rage is connected to all sorts of things. There's all our personal history that comes up here, our personal stuff, if you want to to say that needs to be addressed and that's our own personal work we're also more sensitive to everything around us so we're feeling the field consciousness around us and my goodness the world is in a difficult place at the moment and there'll be tensions within our own families as well so we're feeling all that so we're kind of on overload with what we're having to handle.

But right at the heart of all this, and I feel this very, very passionately, there is a profound indignation in our souls that this sacredness that is built, this inner temple that's built into our being is not named and recognized and supported and that our beings are insulted and that's fundamentally i think what's happening there's this profound indignation coming out that this holy territory is not recognized oh and man do i want to change that i so want to change that totally well number one the thing that's going to change that? I so want to change that. Totally. Well, number one, the thing that's going to change that is us practicing cycle awareness. Because when we practice cycle

awareness, we're able to get into gear with the season and really listen and respond to it and be able to honor and respect these energies that are coming up. So that's really, really crucial, and it's the starting place for this. And, in fact, the next breadcrumb trail, which is so vital in this process, requires attention to yourself and cycle so that you can catch this, so that you can start to get to know it and really be able to respond to it without hesitation. So in other words, to give yourself permission, whether the world recognizes it or not, once you know what this next breadcrumb trail is, you can start to give yourself permission to respond and listen to it.

So Alexandra, let's talk about this little crumb of betrayal. The call, the call, the call to your inner temple. There is a distinct moment that you are going to have where you know that you are being called to the temple. And let's just riff on some of the things that can happen. You'll suddenly, for me, for example, I'm like a driven creature. I used to be in the premenstrual. I was just in gear, just in myself, in my groove. I just delivered.

I was great. And then suddenly it stopped and I find myself drifting just completely in awe and wonder at the wonder of life like 360 I shouldn't drive a car at this point I am dangerous driving a car I have to go very slowly because I'm just like wow I was just in this bliss stage if I was out with people socializing I would become incredibly distracted to the point of rudeness actually I just want to get away I just want to get away and then I get away this is before I understood it as the call before I understood about you know the void before bleeding

and everything I used to get away and go what was that about? You know, like I'd be kicking my heels going, what's going on? And then, of course, I would bleed. Yeah, the one thing that reminds me of is, and I remember this, you know, this often happens for me with work is I suddenly have this feeling of complete saturation with what I'm doing. It's like a nausea that fills my body. I just, I feel sick and tired of everything, like almost repulsed by it. Like I've eaten, you know, a really huge, rich meal and, and, you know, life is offering me another, another, another course. And I'm just like,

oh, I just can't take any more of this. That of one of my signs for sure you had you had a very graph your dreams are very powerful as your call actually you had this last bleed of yours you had a very graphic dream it was just textbook stuff do you want to share that it was textbook actually as i'm paying closer and closer attentions to my dream and my cycle at the same time, really looking at that. I'm noticing I'm having dreams that are cueing the crossover from one season to the other for all the crossovers. And in this last cycle, it was, I think I was day 25. So it was kind of early. But I got the clear signal in my dream that I was crossing over

into menstruation. So I dreamt during the night that, so this was the night before I started bleeding, I dreamt that I was crossing a canyon on this incredibly thin thread, and I remember the feeling of stepping onto it was like a tightrope and as I walked very precariously over this vast cavern where there was no ground beneath me at all there was nothing I remember looking back over my shoulder and the land that I'd come from had also disappeared so I remember turning around and looking towards where I was going and there was there was I could not see the you know the land that I was moving towards and I remember walking walking on this tightrope and eventually the the cliff edge coming into view so that was the one part of

the dream so it's just a you know, crossing the void dream. Couldn't be more clear, could it? That you are leaving one world and you're about to enter another. And so let's just say a little bit about this world that we are entering here, Shani, and that is this inner temple. In the inner temple of menstruation, there are some beautiful states of being that are awaiting us. There's a very distinct process that we go through. There's a whole series of steps, if you like, that you experience. The first thing is, of course, you get the call and then you enter into an empty

space for a while. And then as you start bleeding, you get this amazing feeling of surrender. So you get this extraordinary state of surrender. And with that, this real sense of release and cleansing of the month that's just been, it's just what a gift that is to be able to just drop your bundle gosh and walk off into the sunset nothing more blissful than that and and and this complete sort of hitting rock bottom in a way complete emptiness like you're back to zero you know completely zero and then the beginnings of the new life of this and then you get these amazing feelings of bliss and love I mean this amazing oxytocin wash that can happen get all your endings are soon that's right that return of life is such

a it's such a rising affirmation and can feel really you can feel so right in your own being there's a love your own perfection it's beautiful it's just feel the utter perfection of yourself this is I mean we're anointed by love every month just completely loved up you're cleansed out and then you're loved up you know Wow and this is all for free by the way you don't have to do anything you just have to give in to menstruation so you know in a temple we're being loved up we're being affirmed there's like the rising in a yes and then an ecstasy let's throw ecstasy in you know bliss ecstasy and then this is amazing thing of visioning we get suddenly get the gestalt of our lives we get the meaning of our lives we

get we get visions you know literal visions or just knowingness of what we're supposed to be doing of what our calling is that's our our wild power, isn't it, Tammy? Our wild power, our unique template in us, the unique signature tune of who we are, kind of blasts out at this point, doesn't it? And you get this amazing knowingness of yourself. So we call that the visioning, don't we? And then comes this marvellous, just to cap it off,

as if that wasn't pretty amazing, all that. Then you get this, you know, lovely clarity about your next steps, a lovely sort of tenderness and sweet sort of intimacy with yourself and a clarity about where to go next with your life. And that moment of clarity is very much the signal that you're exiting from your temple. So not only do you have a little signal that you are entering the temple, you've got a lovely signal that you are now just moving towards the exit chamber, if you like, of the temple and moving out and starting to negotiate going back into the world again.

And once again, just like there was a breadcrumb trail to the inner temple leading you in, your body is also going to step you back out again, your cycle process. If you can stay true to your inner state, you're going to feel yourself gently, gradually returned back to the world again. It's the most marvelous system, process, isn't it? This is really at the heart of the spiritual practice that is our menstrual cycle. It's bringing us here to this inner temple to be cleansed, to be renewed, to receive the love so that we can go back out into the world and, you know, be our, be the best version of ourselves. And it's incredibly beautiful to experience just the grace and how much we can receive when we allow ourselves to go with our body and go at the pace of our body.

And to allow ourselves to be worked by the menstrual cycle. Yeah. We're really imagining a world in the not-too-distant future where this need to retreat at menstruation is really respected and honored in our culture in a way that, you know, the need for, in other spiritual traditions, the need to go off to prayer or off to temple, just like in the Jewish tradition, the down toolings at sundown, preparing for the Sabbath, the, you know, the call to prayer, that for us women, this time is fully respected and honored so that when we receive our call to

go to the inter-temple, yeah, there's just this knowing nod. It's like, it's completely supported and respected and acknowledged. And we, you know, all we have to do is just go, oh, it's like, it's completely supported and respected and acknowledged, and we, you know, all we have to do is just go, oh, got the call, got to go, and everyone's like, uh-huh, okay, everybody kind of clear the decks, you know, pick up the pieces, hold the fort, you know, this woman's going in for herself and for us all, because that's the thing is we do this on behalf of all life. This visitation of the sacred temple in ourselves is for us, but it's for all of life. It really matters for, you know, for our communities. We're dreaming for ourselves and for our communities and for the world. So imagine, just imagine when this is just normal and completely the done thing.

As you were saying all that, Shani, I was just leaping up and down in my chair quietly, of course. Yes, yes, absolutely. So to finish, Shani, we just have a little practice we want everyone to share, something we want everyone to share on Facebook. We'd love you to think about what is your call to the temple? You know what? And some of you may actually really know that and do come over and share it right away on our Red School Facebook page. But some of you might need a cycle to track it and to really see that moment. But you are going to have a moment where you suddenly know, I've got to get out of here. I've got to go.

This is it. It will be so marvelous. So if you don't know what your call to the temple is, and it might change from month to month. I mean, I have to say it really depends on your life circumstances. I mean, there are times when, you know, I experience it as extreme irritability or rage, and there are other times when I experience it as this shift into bliss, you know. So that

really is very influenced by what's going on in my life at the time and how much time and space I have for myself and how much I'm able to be responding to my cycle. So pay attention, if you don't know what your call to the temple is, follow the breadcrumb tale, especially from that crossover from summer into autumn, chart your cycle, notice the cues that are leading you, preparing you to enter your temple, see your cycle experience through that lens of, ah, this is a breadcrumb trail taking me deep inside, taking me in to my temple. And then watch and listen and wait to see how you experience the call. And then, you know, your blood will come and you'll be like, aha, that was it. That was it. Sometimes, you know,

I don't know that it's my call until after the fact. And I'm like, oh, that was the call, you know. On one occasion, for example, it was just a huge outburst of grief. And then I started bleeding the next morning. And in retrospect, I was clearing my pipes so to speak I was this grief was just opening the channels of my heart so that I could feel the love that was awaiting me at menstruation and and I didn't clock it at the time but I sort of did but not fully but it was the next day my blood came that I was like wow that was that was really, that was the final call, you know, all boarding now, final call, please.

Everyone take your seats, strap in. We're about to, we're about to go. Yes. Thank you so much for listening and please share your call. We'd love to hear and love to know more. Thank you. Thank you for listening all the way through to the end today. Thank you for being part of the community that's gathered around this work, this movement and this podcast.

We'll be back on Thursday with another of our regular episodes and then the final wild power installment is coming out next Tuesday so until Thursday keep living life according to your own brilliant rhythm Thank you.