The Misery Machine - Maine Urban Legends

Episode Date: March 9, 2020

This week, Yergy and Drewby take a break from the macabre and discuss a few of the many tales and urban legends surrounding their home state of Maine. Stories we cover are: -The Sabattus Well (which we take a journey to try to find) -Colonel Buck’s Tomb in Bucksport  -The Robie-Andrews Dorm which is an allegedly haunted dorm at The University of Southern Maine's (USM) Gorham campus  -The Wood Island Lighthouse -The Seguin Island Lighthouse Hauntings  -Pamola (not the beer)  -The Hermit of North Pond Christopher Knight  -Paul Bunyan -The Monster Of Pocomoonshine Lake -The Ghost Bride Of Haynesville Woods -The Fort William Henry Haunting -Maiden's Cliff Haunting in Camden  -The Legend of Wessie -Bigfoot -Andre the Seal -The Royal Tar Circus Ship That Sank Off Vinalhaven -Portland's Whorehouse Riots -The Turner Beast Join Our Facebook Group to Request a Topic: https://t.co/DeSZIIMgXs?amp=1 Support Our Patreon For More Unreleased Content: https://www.patreon.com/themiserymachine Instagram: miserymachinepodcast Twitter: misery_podcast #truecrime #documentary #mystery

Hi, we're the misery machine. Oh, hey. I'm Drew B. I'm Yergy. And we are bringing you superstitious tales from our home state today. We are. However, since I have not been able to read the Apple podcast reviews in a few weeks for a number of reasons, I really owe that to you guys. So I'm going to start with that and read a few of them.

So this one is from Dumpster Jedi. Love the shorter format and quick but concise storytelling. Thank you very much. And this one is from Ali Nazari. These two are awesome and produced as an amazing podcast. True Crime plus Comedy equals awesome. Well, thank you so much for saying that. And this one is from the folks at Capable Podcast.

This show is great. The hosts know what they're talking about. There's great variety that goes outside of your normal true crime genre shows. I found I am learning something new every time I listen to an episode. Keep up the great work, guys. This one is the winner. So shout out to the folks at Capable Podcast. Yes.

Please check them out. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, it's a very great review, especially since I know that a lot of true crime podcasts put the same information as every other podcast that did an episode, in this case, serial killers. So I always try to dig deep and ask myself questions that haven't been asked or answered in other places and try to think of that. That's why I really like that second Ed Kemper episode a lot because that's exactly what I was trying to do.

So thank you for that. And this last one. So this is from the Spook Cat podcast. Real Talk, Real Entertainment. I love listening each week. Yergy and Drewby do a wonderful job of keeping on point with their topics and being informative in their episodes, while also peppering in Real Talk, which I am all about. Thank you.

One of my favorite listens was the body positivity is toxic episode. It was such a down-to-earth conversation that I resonated with. and on a topic that affects a great many people. That's my favorite. That's my favorite episode. Yeah, it's like the favorite episode I ever did. I know it was totally not a traditional one. And one of five podcasts we did.

That wasn't true crime. Yeah, that wasn't true crime. But that is definitely my favorite. And it's definitely one I want to do again. We have so many things line up we need to get done. So that's probably going to be a while because we did that one. It was during the summertime we did that. It was like July or August.

I think. It was one of our, it was like our fifth episode. I would love to revisit almost a year later and see where we're at with that. It wasn't really our fifth. Episode five, we were still just riffing on random shit. Oh, right. Okay, it was like eight or nine. Yeah, it was pretty early.

Yeah, but it was still summertime. I definitely want to do that one again. Let me continue. This podcast is always a great listen, and I'm always looking forward to the next episode. Love Laura from the Spook Cat podcast. I hope I said it that right. It's not Spook It or Spook. But thank you so much.

Please listen to the Spook Cat podcast. They're very good. And I love reviews like these. So I will continue more next week. Little Housekeeping Notes. If you'd like to support us on Patreon, you can make a small donation and get postcards from us. So please go to our Patreon.

So the link is in the description. And you can get postcards and snaps and all of our secret episodes. We just put a new one in there. And you can only hear it there. A lot of these were probably never going to post up on YouTube or anywhere else. That's the place to go as my phone goes off. I'm so sorry. Geez.

How rude, Drew B. How rude. I bet it's not even going to cut through the mix, but we'll find out. And if you're listening on YouTube, please like and subscribe. It really helps and it goes a long way. We've gotten quite a few new subscribers lately. I finally was able to make a custom URL. I still can't add channel art.

It will not let me. It keeps saying I need to add the art from my Google account. So I click it and it just says this service is not available this time or something like that. If anyone knows what that is, hit me up. Because it's being ridiculous. We don't want some gray screen there. Yeah, seriously, hit me up. Like we have art.

I'll be humble about stuff. I mean, I don't know everything about this sort of thing. Just somebody tell me what to do. So, yes, please do that. And please, and please hit that like. and subscribe button or as as the YouTubers say, smash that like button for the YouTube algorithm.

And if you're listening on iTunes, you can leave us a five-star review and a written review and we will shout you out. Which I will do more regularly. You will get shouted out at the beginning and what is better than that? So with that out of the way, do you have any housekeeping notes, Yerge?

Yeah, join the Facebook group. Oh yeah, join the Facebook group. Keep forgetting about our little Facebook group. We will let you know ahead of time what the episodes are and you get to talk to us. Yes. You can suggest episodes, which we have a lot of episodes that are on the docket, but we will still take suggestions and we'll probably listen to you, especially on a week where we could maybe do two, especially if one's quick.

Is that everything? Yeah, with that out of the way, let's get to our main urban legends. Okay, yes, so these are main urban legends. So this first one, I think I might have heard about it, but I feel like I should have known this. I should have known this too growing up right next to Sabatis and everything. I literally grew up town over. I should have known something like this, but Sabatis well. Apparently that's a thing. One of the creepier stories come out of Maine. Is this someplace where you can see or is it? So I have no idea. I have searched all over the internet trying to figure out which cemetery and Sabatis this Sabatis well is in. There's only like three. It won't say which. So we're going to have to go on a little road trip. time soon when there's less snow. And look for this goddamn well at all the Sabata cemeteries. Well, there's one cemetery I know that's pretty big that when you drive by at night,

there's a flashing light in there. Really? It's the one that goes by the ball field. You know what I'm talking about? Oh, yes, yes, yes. Yeah. You check it out tomorrow if you wanted. We can do that.

Yeah, we can take some pictures. No, it really isn't. I've never been in that one. And there's not much snow right now. I'd like to think you could walk through there, maybe. But we'll see. Let's go check it out. We'll make a little list of all the cemeteries and sabbatus and see if you can find this well.

That sounds good. So this is one of the creepier stories coming out of me. It involves something that is said to have happened not too long ago. This is possibly in the 1990s. So this wasn't confirmed anyone died? I don't know. You'd think that we'd know about this in the 90s. Yeah.

Anyway. Internet. The story goes, a group of young teen boys. They might have been preteens. Dared a friend of theirs to allow himself to be lowered into an old well behind a cemetery in the town of Sabatis. The boy agreed to the dare, and the other boys lowered their friend into a well on a tire attached to the rope, and kept letting him go farther down until they couldn't see him anymore, and the ropes stopped moving.

Okay, already the thing that kind of screams bullshit to me is a tire. They're just walking around with a big-ass car tire when they're like that young. I just don't see it. How are you going to carry a car tire while you're riding your goddamn bike? I mean... Unless they lived on a side. side street near the, I don't know, let's just pretend it's that one over by the ball fields. Yeah.

There's houses around there. I guess if you're all living in the area, chances are kids are riding bikes. And I've tried to transport some things on bikes. It's not easy. No. One of those, you ever fire a potato cannon before? I've seen it done. I have never done it myself.

Yeah, I've done it a few times. And riding with one of those on a bike is not fun. Plus people think you have like a fucking weapon or something, which you kind of do. So the rope stopped moving and they thought maybe he'd fallen off the tire so the boys pulled it back up and their friend was still on it. But not the same friend who went down to the well. His hair had turned white. He appeared much older than when he went down and he could only speak incomprehensible sentences. Legend has it that he is still babbling nonsense at the county mental institution today where he has lived ever since that well incident.

The county mental institution? The county. Do we have an Andruscoggin county mental institution? Where did you find this? So I was checking out online all sorts of main urban legends. Were you on an angel fire page? It was not an angel fire page. This sabbatus well shit popped up on every single one of the ones that I searched.

I am not kidding. We don't even really have like an full-on institution in Andrascogging County. Well, no, no, we don't. There's like the old Amhai up in Augusta. That's it. If that's Stephen County is Andrew. Skoggin, I don't think it is. No, it's kind of back. Yeah. I think this one is bullshit,

especially with the fact that it was in the 1990s. Hey, we're millennials. There's no such things. Urban Legends anymore. I'm not a millennial, but okay. You're a millennial. I am an elder millennial. Yeah, it's still a millennial. So the next one here, I'll read this one because I've actually been there and seen all this. Gen Y adjacent.

Gen Y adjacent. I'm not, no. No. Okay. So it's Colonel Buck's, tomb. So the founder of Buck's port, Colonel Jonathan Buck, fell in love with a woman and she became pregnant with his son. Upon learning us, he forced her to leave and she spent the next few years raising her son alone. What an asshole. Damn, it's, I'm so in love with this woman that I'm going to knock her up and send her away. Right. Eventually, the woman came back to Colonel Buck requesting assistance in caring for his son, which he refused. To ensure she would not bother him again, he pronounced her a witch and had her burns.

During the fire, her leg was fetched by her son who ran away to bury it on his own as a memorial to his mother. After Colonel Buck's death, his own tomb showed signs of a stain in the form of a leg. Despite attempts to remove it, including changing the stone for a new one, the leg image remained and is still there today. This is true. So you saw that. This is true. There is a leg stain image there. Yes.

I will have to go and find some pictures of it. for you. We can talk about this a little bit more. You can maybe get into the next one. I could pull some images up to show you exactly what that looks like. Okay. But it looks like moss or a stain and it looks like a leg from the knee down with a pointy foot. But the legend has it that they've cleaned this with acid. They have tried to put a new stone and this has been going on for year after year after year and it's still there. And this is like a big stone in the middle of downtown Bucksport. Oh really? Yeah. Every time I think a Bucksport, I think of where the cave is, which is in the middle of nowhere. Right. It's not near the cave. So like downtown Bucksport, if you're going to drive through Brewer to get there, there's

the fort of there, Fort Knox, and the big... Fort Knox. Yeah, it's called Fort Knox. And there's a big, big bridge that has the observatory at the top of it. I went up there a couple of summers ago, but across the river is the gravestone. So I found the pictures on my phone just now and gave my phone to Drewie, so what do you think? At first glance, I thought it was some weirdo lightning bolt but yeah that's a lower calf with a foot the foot looks kind of pointy looks like a sock so they've even switched the tomb and the stain keeps coming back that's crazy yeah i didn't know we had any witch burnings the next time i'm in the bangor area or we go to the bangor area or whatever go see a show up there or something we will have to make a pit stop here yeah absolutely because it's pretty cool it's behind a

fence like this so you have to get your camera in there but yeah okay so the right so the right so the Roby Andrews dorm is something that I stayed plenty of night in there and it was a dry dorm, but that didn't stop anybody, not a one. Are you sure that's a dry dorm? It is a dry dorm. What was the one door that wasn't? I forget. I stayed in the one not dry dorm.

How long ago? Oh, God, I was like 18. Well, there's Dickie Wood, the towers. I don't think that's a dry dorm, but it might be. You probably weren't around for New Hall. and then there's Upton Haystains is not a dry dorm. Maybe that's where I was visiting some friends who were staying at.

We're talking about the University of Southern Maine at the Gorm campus. Yes. It is a really old building. I played Outlast in Roby Andrews. I never knew there was some sort of like haunting thing here. Supposedly it's haunted. No one ever told me this.

Built in the 1800s, the Roby Andrews dorm is the oldest building in the Gorm campus. Within that time, there have been numerous stories of suicide and murder, many of which include spirits that have stopped. around for future generations of students. In one story, a girl hung herself in the tower after learning she was pregnant. In another, a young woman falls to her death in front of a throng of people.

Was she pushed or did she jump herself? It's unclear, but one thing is for sure she hasn't quite found peace as she can still be seen and heard around the dorm. Dorm residents have reported hearing noises and feeling cold areas. Some people have reportedly seen a woman in the tower. Sounds fairly normal to learn that the tower had been closed off in excesses. inaccessible for many, many years. Right? I didn't know that about the tower. I didn't know that about any of this.

No one never told me this. I've stayed there a million times and gone to a million parties. I don't know. You're just thinking a haunted place more people would be dying. I mean, you would think a place that's haunted, just things would happen that would just take you. I've only been haunted by booze there. Playing Outlast was super fucking fun there. It was scary as shit.

No, I didn't play Outlast there. I played Amnesia, the Dark Descent. Yeah, it was scary as fuck. I miss USM. Miss USM, but those were, those days were behind. So next one here is the Wood Island Lighthouse. The lighthouse on Wood Island has a few scary theories related to its haunting. In one, the lighthouse is haunted by ghosts of fishermen Howard Hobbs, who shot and killed his landlord Fred Milliken in 1896. The story goes that Hobbs

and his roommate, William Moses, had been drinking heavily when Milliken was asked to speak to them about their overdue rents. Hobbs went to shoot Milliken in the chest before he turned the gun on himself inside the Wood Island lighthouse. Following the suicide, reports of moaning and unexplained shadows began to be told by the keepers living in the lighthouse. In 1972, the light was removed negating the need for any keepers to live within the haunted light. If you take a visit now, you'll see that an automated light now exists and perhaps you'll

hear Hobbs moaning on his own without a keeper to keep him company. So that seems like a weird story. Why would you just do a murder suicide over overdue rent? And what happened to William Moses? Yeah, what's up? Where's William? Yeah, this isn't make any sense to me. Sounds like bullshit. Yeah.

Okay, the Seguin Island Lighthouse Haunings. In the mid-1800s, the lighthouse was inhabited by a caretaker and his wife. To combat the lonely isolation of the island, the caretaker had a piano ship to keep his wife occupied. He probably should have found out her level of expertise before providing this gift, though. Unfortunately, she only knew one song and played it incessantly. Eventually the caretaker could take no more, went a bit insane, and destroyed the piano with an axe. Next, he killed his wife, and finally himself. Or the axe?

I mean, damn, is that like some, where the red fern grows shit? Yeah, kind of. You know what I'm talking about? Well, I know it's about those doggies. Yeah, but you know how, like, the final antagonist dies? I don't remember. I just remember the dog gets like rabies, dies, and then the other one gets sad and dies, and the red fern grows between their graves.

The bully boy that always kept harassing the main character, he tried to take an axe to the boy. He tripped in, Bell, like, onto the axe blade. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I was just thinking, how do you kill yourself with an axe? I don't know.

You fall on it. I don't know. Today, local folks claim to hear the lone song coming from the lighthouse. Yeah, but I wonder what that song was. I don't know. I don't know. What a weird thing. So the next one is Pomola.

This is a bit of folklore from the Pinnopscot Native American nation. Pomola is supposed to be a half man, half eagle, but with a head of a moose. The creature lives in a cave on top of the tallest mountain in the state, which is Mount Katahdin. Because Pomola does not like people coming to visit it. He lets them know his displeasure by creating crazy weather on top of the mountain, like unpredictable storms of wind, rain, and snow. These storms are frequently seen to concentrate at the peak of Pomola's mountain. This is just weird. I didn't know what Pomola was.

There was a band in Portland. They were like this noise rock band called Pomola. They were pretty cool. And I never knew where that came from. But you said there's a beer called Pomola too. Yeah. So Baxter Brewing here in Lewiston, Maine. Well, we're in Auburn, Maine, but it's just the next town across the river.

It's basically Lewis. We're all just one big thing. Auburn is Lewiston. Let's be real here. Yeah. So they have their own beer called Pomola. And a lot of people, when they go and climb Mount Katata and go up to the Pomola peak, we'll go and take selfies drinking that up there.

Not finding no Pomola. up there. I mean, I want to talk to Brandon about living in New Mexico because there's apparently mountains that nobody goes to and the local Native Americans believe that they're still, like, they believe they're skin walkers about and you just don't go there or you die or some shit. I don't know. I should, I should have him on and have him talk about that. He should. He should definitely talk about skin walkers with us. Because he knows a lot about that stuff because, well, he lived in a reservation. Through the magic of podcasting, we were able to pause this, wait until the next day,

and we went to go find the sabbatus well. Let me tell you, as far as I know, that shit doesn't exist. We only went to one cemetery. There's only one real cemetery in sabatist. There might be one more, but that was the most, it's the one right in the center of town, so I don't know. Do you know any others off top of your head? Because I sure is held out.

No, I'll have to, like, go through a map and try to plot them out. But we went all through this cemetery with my car, and there was no well in the back of it. There was a bunch of random bouquets just scattered around, not even near any graves. Yeah, people stop bringing those bouquets to your relatives. They're ugly. Just... Yeah, seriously. Plant some real flowers or just don't.

Just like go hang out. Those fake bouquets are ugly and wasteful. Yeah, so my great-great-grandmother who was buried in Farmington. One of my aunts went there and planted a spider plant next to her grave, because she loved spider plants when she was alive. Because of this, it was hard for me to find her grave when I finally went looking for it because it's now obscured by this giant spider plant. But I think that's much more meaningful than leaving some flowers you got at Haniford,

which are overpriced, by the way. Fuck that shit. In Europe and stuff like that grave marker I showed you of my uncle. Yeah. They plant full on little gardens in front of them. See, that seems wonderful. Yeah. It seems wonderful.

I would be all for that. Yeah, and I don't think that's everywhere. Like, I know we talked about this in an episode much way previously about different burial practices, different places. And I couldn't find any examples of these wood gravestones until I found the one of my uncles. So it must be just a regional thing. If I get absolutely aced in a car accident or somebody just wants to come up and punch my ticket for whatever reason, plant me a garden. That's pretty cool. That sounds cool.

Plant me a garden. I'll make you a garden, Kirby. Oh, I thank you. And if you die, I'll do something. not so gardeny because I suck at it. No, I'll learn. You'll learn. Thank you. I'll plant something for you. You can make some herbs, so bits and pieces of me go into the herbs and you can eat them and

have a Yergy within you. Oh my God. This is some family guy shit. This cake has my hair in it. Now I'm inside of you, Brian. Do you feel me, Brian? Do you feel me inside of you? I thought what Richard Khrushchevah from Romstein, his idea is that when he dies, he is money

set aside for a gravestone that if somebody walks near it, it will play a piece of music that he composed. That's pretty cool. Which I think is pretty cool. It's probably expensive as hell and probably really easy to break the mechanism. But in theory, it sounds really wonderful. I don't know. I like weird, weirdo graves. Me too. Which we have, I wouldn't say a ton, but we have some very interesting graves in Maine and in Providence. In Providence. They have good ones. Yeah, New England. New England in general. New England. But we talked about this in the whole Marie LaVe Oh shit, which nobody watched. Anyway.

Anyway. The Hermit of North Pond. So this was pretty recently and is a true story. Is it really? Yes. Oh, I, okay. Yeah, I noticed. Because it's right by my mother's house.

Yeah, so they thought it was like animals stealing food for a long period of time. But really it was this guy. And I think he was cited a couple times and people, people thought it was like Sasquatch or some shit. Yeah. Yeah. So in the town of Rome, Maine, people keep lake houses as they live in during the summer because, you know, boomers. For years, these.

summer dwellers would notice things missing from their homes when they went there. Usually the missing items were food or clothing or sometimes batteries or similar survival items. The residents began talking of a hermit possibly living in the woods nearby, but it was just a rumor though until 2013 when a resident saw the hermit who left the scene in a canoe. The local police investigated and discovered a man named Christopher Knight who had been living in the nearby woods for nearly three decades. Knight never said why he became a hermit and the reason is still a mystery.

So he was arrested, right? Yeah, he did get in trouble, so it was for all the thefts. And technically, I think they cited him for littering, too. Yeah. Because his encampment was kind of gross. Yeah, and I can't believe nobody had found it prior, but nobody did. It wasn't that hidden, I don't think. No, and I'm surprised he made it that long because it gets really cold there.

Yeah. You're in the middle. That whole region of Maine is a bunch of ponds and lakes, because my mom lives in what would be known is the greater Belgrade Lakes area. She lives in Mount Vernon, and so does my sister. but it gets pretty chilly. So having done a little more research, it looks like he had a camp that was obscured within a cluster of glacial boulders. So that's why he wasn't found. And he spent, again, almost 30 years there, only seen one person at the time where he just said hi.

And then he was discovered by a group of fishermen. But they agreed to not tell anyone because he just wanted to be left alone. He apparently entered the woods at age 20 and said goodbye to nobody. and his parents never reported him missing. And yeah. It's kind of sad. It is pretty sad. I mean, he doesn't like to talk about his motives for doing this,

but he just said that solitude bestows an increase in something valuable in my perception. But when I applied my increased perception to myself, I lost my identity. There was no audience, no one to perform for. To put it romantically, I was completely free. And, yeah, he did seven months in jail with all but one week served, because he was awaiting sentencing and he had like three years probation, had to pay two grand in restitution. I don't even know where he would have gotten the money for that as he was a hermit.

And yeah, and he now has a job with his brother and doesn't plan to go live in the woods again. But like what a weird thing like 30 years later. Yeah, so probably what they had him do is when he secured that job. That was probably part of his probation. They probably just had him pay a little at a time. Yeah, because they didn't say that he was an alcoholic, but he had to go to substance abuse counseling. Like it's a co-occurring disorders court program.

And it says it's also designed for people with mental health disorders. So I wondered if they used it for him as a way to react or me because there's obviously some level of culture shock there. Imagine what's changed within 30 years. A lot. A ton. So, yeah, I just, it's such a crazy thing to think of. But yeah, he did really well. He survived temperatures as low as negative 25.

I imagine the shelter he would have built around those rocks might have helped to look thinking about it now. He said what he would do is waking up during the coldest part of the night and pacing his camp until he was warm. He regularly took cold sponge bath, shaved and cut his hair, and avoided building smoky fires, but relied upon a propane camp stove to cook and melt snow for drinking and bathing. Just crazy to me. So he mostly probably stole a bunch of propane. Yeah, that's what I would say that he did. Probably stole food. It doesn't say that he hunted.

Yeah, he's like 54 now. It's just so nuts to me that somebody was able to do that. Especially it didn't seem like before entering the woods that he was at all and experienced woodsman. So I don't know if this was a dude that maybe he was a scout or something or maybe he didn't know much at all and just kind of made it work. There's so many people that thought it was easy, tried to make it work and died like the dude from Into the Wild.

You know what I'm talking about? No. Oh, so that was a guy who, he was this really free-spirited hippie. kid and he said he was going to live in the woods in Alaska, and he just basically starved to death or froze to death, one of the two. And yeah, a lot of people like to discuss that case because they think of was this kid trying to commit suicide in some way, shape, or form. He is often discussed. But yeah, it's a very interesting case. But yeah, I didn't know Paul Bunyan is a legend native to Maine. I believe so. Basically, it is legend native to Maine. The story goes that the

famous lumberjack was born here. He is supposedly responsible for many of the features of the natural landscape of Maine. As an example, his boot prints are said to have been so big that they became the lakes of Maine. And the fields and meadows of the state are supposedly created as Paul rolled around in his sleep, clearing the land of the trees that were near him. Probably didn't work that well because we have so many trees, so many areas. We just had a giant with a big blue ox. Ox in are not. And native to Maine. No. Much less blue ones.

I thought that was a legend from out west, like Montana. That's where I thought Paul Bunyan was from. No, but Idaho. That the big statue of any of you have seen the second version of it or the second installment of the new it, the big Paul Bunyan statue that Pennywise takes over is actually in Bangor. Is it really? Yes, it is.

It's right in front of the Hollywood casino. Is it really? I didn't even notice that. I mean, I've been to the Hollywood casino, but... It's across the street from the casino. Is it? And in back of it is like the cross insurance center. So it's in that little area right there.

I'll have to look for it. I did not know that. There was some sort of punk band that sang a song about how poor Paul Bunyan used to stare at the river. And now he has to get a little bigger because the friggin casinos in his way. And he can't see it. What punk band is this? I don't remember. It was a band that played at that big festival I went to up there where the dropkick

Marfis were playing. So it was a local band. Oh, it was a local band. Yeah. They had like a huge second stage of just all local bands. Okay. The monster of Poco Moonshine Lake. This is a lake in Washington County where no one lives.

And it's held stories of lake monsters for as long as any mainer in the area can remember. Some have even reported seeing the snake-like beings along with the trails they leave behind when they come to and leave the lake. While there are no photos of the creature, locals estimate them to be anywhere from 30 to 60 feet long, could date back as far as 1873. This just sounds like a Loch Ness Monster ripoff. So I've never heard of this one, but I have one further down that we can touch on that's related. That's a little bit more recent if you want to scroll down. Right here, the legend of Wessie. Do you remember Wessie? No. He had his own Twitter page and everything. So it was back in June of, I believe it was 2018. A Westbrook woman claimed she saw a snake as large as a truck eat a small mammal.

near the banks of the presumption river. Precum shot river. In August, a man walking along the river found a molten skin of a 12-foot-long snake belonging to an anaconda. Oh yeah, I do remember that now. It caused a huge, ridiculous fucking panic. I think that's the same area

where last winter, they had the... The discs. Yeah, they had the floating ice disk, the revolving ice disc, or the island of ice. And somebody went out there and stuck a flag in it. And it broke. Yeah.

So no one really knows. knows if Wesi exists, but she made national news. But someone made a Twitter page for Wesie. I got retweeted. It was really interesting. Wesie retweeted me and was really excited that he or she had the coolest follower ever. Oh my God. And wrote something like, when do I meet your parents? Damn, Wesie want to fuck. Yeah, Wesley want to fuck. So the ghost bride of Haynesville Woods. Okay, so this is what I know about. And it's not just native to hear. There's other states that have a similar... And there's different areas of Maine that have a similar type legends.

Yeah, so on a wooded road in the outskirts of Hainesville, which do you know where that is? I have no idea. I'm sure it's like either down east or up north. There's a stretch between Wilton and Jay that people say. There's a ghost bride there, too. I don't know. But on the wooded roads on the outskirts of Hainesville, a newlywed couple traveled on a dark winter night. The story tells us that the groom was drunk and lost control of car hitting a telephone pole which killed him after the young bride crawled from the wreckage and made her way back to the snowy road she waited for hours for someone to drive by to help her however the conditions of the night meant that nobody was traveling the woman never received help because in

Maine sometimes some major roads don't even have a single car drive through them overnight they have no lights yeah and no lights whatsoever don't be driving to callus at night from bangor I mean that that's probably a little more well-traveled, but still when I went through there, the few times I've gone through there, there's like no cars whatsoever. It is reported that she has remained in the same place in her wedding gown where she eventually froze to death. Travelers on the road have reported seeing the woman in the white gown outside the Haynesville woods. She can still be wandering along the side of the road searching for help that never came. Some even claim to have spoken to the woman. In these situations, she tells the driver of her situation, but as the vehicle approaches close,

the woman suddenly disappears. Yeah, there's a million stories like this. There's like versions of it where it's a bunch of kids coming back from prom. Yeah. And it's in different places in Maine. But yeah, it's a very similar story about a woman in the road. Yeah. Is what it boils down to.

So the Fort Williams Henry Haunting. This fort at Pemiquit Beach is in Bristol. Is a Bristol, Maine? Is there? I didn't think there was. Apparently there is. I know of Pemiquid Beach, but I, I didn't know there was a Bristol name.

I didn't know there was a Bristol Maine either. There's a lot of places I don't know about. It's said to be haunted by the spirit of Native American chief talk Alexis. He was killed by hanging near the fort in 1696 and is said to live in the same tree where he was hung. You may be able to see him in the form of a white orb near the entrance of the front of the fort. I don't even know where this fort is. Yeah, I don't either. I know Pemiquid Beach.

I've heard that. Like I know where Lake Pemiquid is. Maybe that's, I don't know. Some of these places are clearly in the middle of nowhere because in places where not a lot of people live and there's no internet, I was actually talking to somebody the other day who grew up in the down east area, midcoast area, excuse me, like Wiscasset. Like I believe this is midcoast. Is it? Yeah. Yeah.

So I talked to somebody who my age, Wiscat grew up around the like the Wiscasset area, but more outskirts said that that area didn't get DSA. until like 2005, maybe 2006, which is nuts to me. Because I was the last kid to get DSL, and that was in like 2003, 2004. But all my friends have had DSL since like the year 2000. That was just like nutty to me. But yeah, all these places seem to be in the middle of fucking nowhere. I'm looking this up right now. So just give me a second.

So I was right. Bristol is down east. It's like right past booth bag. You know how the little harbors look like little fingers coming off of me? Yeah, I do. It's like right after Booth Bay. Okay. Okay, then we have the Maiden's Cliff haunting in Camden, which I've never been to. I have. So in this tale, a young woman falls to her death off the rocks of Maiden Cliff. During a blustery day, her hat blew off her head and sailed through the air. In an attempt to retrieve it, the young girl was killed. She either died at the site or was carried home where she later passed away. Her spirit still haunts the area, which is marked by a white cross. This is it right here. I'll show you. I don't see the white cross. Oh, that's huge.

This looks recent though No it's a recent picture No I mean the the cross looks like it was put there recently It doesn't look very archaic Yeah but it's it's a really pretty area I used to camp down in that area I went to this 4-H Yeah I went to this like hippie camp called Camp Tanglewood

It was a 4-H camp And what's a 4-H camp It's basically ecology and wildlife And 4-H really has to do with farm stuff as well Okay horse girls Yeah, but this didn't have horses. It was like literally just a summer camp in the woods and you had a whole bunch of hippie counselors and it was actually really expensive to go. I had no idea about this at the time. The first time I got to go, Nicole and I went on a scholarship and then in years previous my mom's rich boss at the time would send us. But I looked into how expensive it was these days. To go for a week, it's over grand. What the fuck?

And I never understood any of why a lot of the campers there were from out of state. There was one year I had a whole bunch of girls in the cabin with me that all met at summer camp one year. And then every year their parents sent them the same week. I'm like, why are these kids from all over the country coming here? There was ones from Michigan. There were ones from Miami. There were ones from Georgia. One girl was from Cambridge.

Why are they all going to this camp? It's fucking rich kids. Hippy camp is where I was going. I guess so. But we had different electives we got to do during the day. And I'd always go on the hiking ones because we got to like leave the camp to go. So when we did Maiden's Cliff, we all got stung by yellow jackets because the trail up was like infested with ground wasp nests. And everyone got stung.

I didn't get stung, but everyone else did. When I was younger, I really wanted to be sent to a summer camp because it just like so much fun. And my summers were very boring because I couldn't go out and do anything or go anywhere. And that's something I really wanted to do. But as I got older, I obviously wouldn't want to do that. And in retrospect, I might have hate it. Well, maybe not when I was younger, but. So the thing that really annoyed me about this camp was it was so expensive to go, but they never let a shower.

What? So there were a big set of bathrooms that had showers and we were only allowed to take one shower a week the entire time we were there, which I guess was fine because we could go swimming in the swimming hole every day. It was the camp was on the Dut-Srap River, which goes to the ocean. And it was kind of a cleaner part of the river. so we got to swim in it. But we got pretty nasty. So that was really kind of annoying. And then they never fed us.

They never seemed to have enough food. How did you eat? So basically they would, it was cereal generally for breakfast, always was skimelt. And then it was usually tofu pups or veggie burgers or regular burgers for lunch. And then at dinner, they would make different things, but they never would make enough. So they would make a little round thing of raviolis, baked raviolies. It looked like they made it in a pie plate. and that was supposed to fit a whole table of kids.

And there would be like 10 people at a table. So by the time it would get around, there wasn't any left and they'd have to like go make more spaghetti. And you were only allowed to drink a milk and like skim milk and water the whole time you were there. So they just basically made you calorie deficient. I don't know. That sounds like starvation rations. Yeah. Like we didn't have snacks.

If we pack snacks, they would take them away from us and lock them up. Oh my God. This is barbaric sounding. Yeah. We didn't really eat very well. the whole time we were there. That's insane. And for like little kids running around,

we definitely needed some calories. Yeah. And for parents to pay that much for that kind of treatment, Jesus Christ. Yeah. And I mean, it just wasn't like we were being, we always were like doing activities,

whether it was like some soccer game or ultimate frisbee up at the little sports field they had or going hiking because I always went on all the hiking and all the swimming ones that we could go on. Yeah, I would have too. There was one time we, oh God, I did this group challenge thing.

And it was really fun until the group challenge. where we walked down the entirety of the duck trap river until we hit the ocean. Oh my God. That must have been a while. It took all day. And then we ended up walking back. We took the road back. And it got so crazy that there was another group coming back from a hike that saw us. And they went and just dropped everyone off and then came and picked us up in the van because it was getting ridiculous. And we had just packed some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. And it was my job to carry it in my backpack. And I kept falling in the river, like on the rocks and stuff. because it was more of a rocky type of, like,

and our sandwiches were demolished. It was terrible. It's the thing. When you're a kid, you could walk from one end of the country to the other and not have your joints hurt, but you get older and then obviously that changes, right? So I don't know.

This is always crazy to me because I remember making very long, there was times in my life where I went to a friend's house or I was sleeping over at a cousin's house where we were allowed to go places and do things. And I just felt like I could just walk forever. And yeah, I'd get tired. And yeah, maybe my feet might hurt a little, but it wasn't like, oh, my knee hurts, my hip hurts or anything like that. My feet definitely hurt from this because this was the time in the 90s when Tevas were really popular.

What are Tevas? Tevas, they are a pair of sandals that are like very strappy. They had like Velcro straps and they were all different colors. They sold them at LL beans and some people wore Tevas with crazy socks. No arch support. Some of them had better arch support than others. Like if they were the real name brand ones, you could do whatever. whatever. But after walking in wet tivas everywhere and then having to walk all the way back and it was

it was a long way back. My feet were all blistered and cut up. It was terrible. Like that point I should just start walking barefoot because it was awful. Yeah, I can't. I have had baby feet ever since a young kid and I could never walk outside barefoot. Oh, it always hurt so fucking bad. Yeah, I don't know. I need my shoes. I need my arch support. I need those things. I found it was flat footed when I was like 19 or something. A chiropractor just happened to check. She's like, nobody's ever told you you're flat-footed. And I'm like, no.

She's like, well, you're flat-footed. I'm like, oh. But then I got like arch support and all that. I had inserts. And then six years later, another doctor tells me you're not flat-footed. You never seen anyone with, hey, these are tivas. Those just look like regular sandals. No, they became popular in the 90s and people were multi-colored polar flee socks with them.

I don't know, man. Sandals look like sandals to me, except for Birkenstocks or whatever they're called. All right, big foot. I don't want to do this one to death because it's just so trite, but Bigfoot sightings have happened allegedly in Maine. In September 2015, a 12-year-old boy in Turner claimed he saw Bigfoot in the woods, but that's not the first time people in Maine have claimed seeing Bigfoot. Early stories of this Bigfoot date back to Native American tales told by the Pinabscot and past Macquarie tribes. And we've also had sightings of the New Jersey Devil up here and just stuff like that.

So it's just, I don't, I'm just going to skim over that, but. Yeah. So Bigfoot's do happen here, even if they're the main hermit. Yeah. Oh, yeah, true. Right. So Andre the seal, he was real. Was he real?

He was real. So Andre was born in Rockland in 1961, but was promptly abandoned by his mom. Luckily for him, Rockport Harbor master Harry Goodridge found him and took the two-day-old pop in. Andre grew splashing up in Rockport Harbor, where Harry taught him tricks. The Harbour seal took to it and perils. took to it and performed for summer crowds. Harry built him a large cage in the harbor where he'd spent his summer nights. In his early days, Andre was allowed to roam free in the harbor in the winter,

but after he capsized a few boats and bothered enough fishermen, Harry had to bring him to Boston and Connecticut aquariums for the winter. Each spring, Andre was released into the ocean and he made his swim back up to Rockport. This befuddled scientists and captivated locals who would track Andre. Every year, his journey caused a small media frenzy. He became one of the most famous manors, The town of Rockport erected a statue in his honor, which he helped unveil. And yeah, and named Andre the honorary harbor master. So when Andre was 25, he had cataracts and Harry had to drive him from Massachusetts up to Rockport. That summer in 1986, Andre got in a fight mid-mating season with another male seal in Rocklands.

After that, when a crowd spotted the performer, he refused to put on a show. Newspapers at the time insinuated he was too ashamed and he died shortly after. I don't know what the average lifespan is for a seat. So I don't know if 25 is old or not. Yeah. You know? I'm not sure. I mean, I could look it up for you.

I imagine it's pretty, probably pretty old. So what I'm confused about is when they said he capsized a few boats. A seal? A seal capsizing boats? They're probably just like little dingies and stuff. Okay. Just splashing around. Yeah.

Or trying to get on them. I mean, it's just a seal, you know? There's seals in Maine. It's not a giant deal. You go to a pop them and you'll see little seals in the water. Yes, you can. They're very cute. I remember I saw them the first time? I was like, there's seals in Maine? Oh, my God. And they just float in the water and stare at you. And they're really cute. Yeah, I didn't know about that. Too bad Rockport is a million miles away. Yeah, so females outlive males 30 to 35 years versus 20 to 25 years. I mean, Rockport's not that far. Let's just say we head up to Bangor to see all the crazy stuff in Bangor. We could take Route 1 and see all this. Yeah, but from Bangor, it's like, what, another hour? So if you take Route 1, do the whole coastal route up? You can,

hit rock port you will hit bucksport so we can see the foot and then it's maybe 20 minutes into Bangor and just take the interstate home okay yeah I've done it a few ways like that way here's a place I need to see at one point in my life but it's just it's just tough to get to it's two hours off the coast on a ferry vinyl haven the circus ship that sank off vinyl haven it was October in 1836 when royal tar a big steamboat was chugging down to portland from new brunswick the royal Tar was bringing 93 people, including crew, along with a traveling circus with an elephant, two camels, and lots of exotic birds. The one-year-old boat was also carrying a traveling wax show. Quote, save for the greater portion of human beings must have appeared like a modern Noah's Ark,

one newspaper reported. The weather was terrible that October, and the boat was having a hard time getting down the main coast with all the wind. The captain kept trying to push it forward, but was forced to stop in Eastport, then Cutler, then tried to, again to leave, but returned to Machias Bay. When they finally got the tar steaming toward Portland on October 25th, the lead engineer noticed the boiler's water was way too low, so the boat again had to put its anchor down, this time by North Haven and Vinyl Haven. About 30 minutes later, somebody saw the boiler room was on fire. The crew tried to hose down the flames to no avail, and the ship was a burning mess in no time. The St. John Daily Sun wrote,

The steamer was a blaze in the middle while the crew and passengers were madly rushing to and fro at the bow and stern. The shouts of excited men, the shrieks of helpless women, and the whales of little children were mingled with the rows of terror from the imprisoned wild of beast. So good thing the Royal Tar had lifeboats, well, too. That could hold maybe 30 people of the 93 that were on there. And according to the news reports of the time, 16 able-bodied men found one of the two escape boats, lowered it, hopped in, and rode away, leaving their fellows with women and children to escape as best as they could. Meanwhile, someone was nice enough to unpen the six horses and two camels and pushed them into the ocean. Two of the horses made it to shore.

Unlike the push camels and horses, the elephant saw what was going down, ran for the side of the steamboat and jumped into the ocean. Oh my God. It landed on several of the makeshift rafts people were buoyed to. The elephant broke the rafts and drowned several people, then drowned itself. A cutter shooter, based in Castine, saw the wreck and came in 30 minutes saving 40 lives. In all, 32 people died. Four men, eight women, ten children, and ten crew. As did every animal except those two horses.

I'm surprised the birds didn't get away. Yeah, I know. What the hell? So no one unpinned the birds? Maybe they were caged, yeah. Legend has it the survivors in St. John New Brunswick, where the boat left from, used to dine together every October 25th. The other legend I heard is, that's why there's so many snakes on North Haven.

So if there were snakes in the circus, maybe they survived too. So I've known people that have lived in North Haven and I know somebody that lives in Vinyl Haven currently. And I hear it's pretty wacky. I hear it's pretty, especially North Haven. I hear living as island folk can be weird. Vial Haven, though I hear is very nice. However, there is no cops up there. Maybe one will come around every few days or so.

So people drive drunk there constantly and it's fine, I guess. I also heard if you pass somebody on the road and you don't wave high to them, they will follow you and chew you out for not doing so. I don't know. I don't know if that's true. That might be a legend. Island people. Well, this was according to somebody who had been there multiple times told me this. I don't know, though, and was traveling with a local.

So I went when I was 20 with one of my friends. His family owns a large summer cabins, but they were all like in a line. So it was just kind of like a weird rental if you were a tourist. Okay. And they also owned a little store with a restaurant and a bowling alley. Jesus Christ. On the island. On the island.

The uncle was a lobsterman, but he also did some fishing too. And the aunt kind of managed all of that. So we ended up spending two nights there. And it was really, really fun. And I had the most delicious fried fish I've ever had in my life for breakfast, one of those mornings. I mean, it's fresh off the dock. So you would think so. Yeah, well, the uncle had brought it in. It was like six in the morning. He had already come in with all of his traps and brought in some cod. So his aunt went and like battered it up and fried it. And that was breakfast, which is like these little fish squares. Hands down literally the best fish I've ever had in my life. Man, I just can't believe that there's a bowling alley in Vinyl Haven. That's what surprises me the most. Yeah, things could have changed. I was probably about 20 years old. Okay. So, yeah. It was pretty fun though. Like I would definitely go again. Yeah, I want to. It's definitely on the bucket list. I've taken the mail book.

tour out of Portland to all those little islands around there and those are pretty cool, but I've wanted to explore some of the islands more. I feel like being a mainer for most of my life, I owe it to the state to at least see some of what this place has to offer for better or for worse. And there was a really yummy donut shop. Not that I eat donuts that often, but they kind of made the kind of cake-like ones that I enjoy that they have as well. I don't know if they have any gluten-free ones, I hope so. I mean, it is Camden. They probably do. Oh, it's a Camden. Oh, I thought you meant in vinyl hit. So Camden Rock Lens wherever the ferry is that you hop on.

There's like a donut shop across the street that's yummy. I mean, I could always go to Holy Donut in Portland. They make gluten-free donuts. Yeah. So, yeah. Make potato ones. They do. They make potato ones.

I've never been. They're very, very good, though I haven't gone in a very long time. So you'll have to take me. Yes, for sure. Okay, I didn't know about this one. Portland's whorehouse riots. Yes, I didn't know about this one either until I found it. I didn't know Portland had a ton of whorehouses.

Apparently. Okay, well, so in 1825, a mob of prostitute hating men rioted. It sounds like an MRA, like fantasy made up. An MRA adjacent group. And the Amazon's will come in and kill us all and cut off our dicks. But nope, I guess, you know, that came true. This is why we can't allow feminism, folks, or stuff like this happens. even though I don't think there was feminism in 1825.

So these prostitute hating men rioted tore down three brothels and killed a man. In the book The Wild Wild East by William Lenka, he wrote, prostitution dens in downtown Portland aroused. Aroused. Ah, criticism from neighbors. And reportedly, even the building's owners wished to have them torn down. Understanding the feelings of the owners and the wishes of the neighbors, a company of laboring.

Oh, people. truckmen, ah boys, assembled in the evening, turned out the tenants and tore the buildings to the ground, a police crowd of hundreds watches. Now obviously the prostitutes just moved. You can burn down the house, but you can't tear down the jobs. And actually when the mob of idle roaring boys and raw Irishmen tried to tear down the whorehouse at Crab Trees Wharf, it wouldn't fall, so they burned it with people inside. By that time, a few brothels had been demolished and the city had allowed it. But burning a wharf apparently was too much for Portland. I mean, yeah, that's I mean, that's many people's livelihoods. So city officials arrested a few people and then let them

go. Well, they shouldn't be burning shit in Portland. That's how the whole fucking city went up. Portland's caught on fire like three or four times since its inception. Those prostitutes kept prostituting this time on 4th Street, which is kind of a fancy street. This place was owned by a barber who was about to go to prison for running a whorehouse. But, But the mob chose to render more speedy justice. They brought guns this time. So did the barber. There was a shootout where one man died and about seven more were shot and hurt.

Thus ended the Portland Horehouse riots and the whores set up business again. That's fabulous. Ah, my. I'm just thinking about like a big shootout on 4th Street. Between one barber and a bunch of mobsters? No, I'm trying to think about it in modern day. This doesn't seem real. But the fact that it happened in 1800s, there should be.

enough documentation for that to be real, you would think. Someone's hiding in gritties or something, shooting out somebody over at five guys. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know. So weird. There was like this burrito place I really liked over on 4th Street. It was at 424th Street. It was granny's.

It was delicious. Oh, I don't remember that at all. It must have been a long time ago. It was when I came back from Bangor, so I would have been in my very early 20s. They had like a vegan special that was really yummy. They had different flavor tofu or tempe every single. day that you could get inside of it. It was really good.

And then we have the Turner Beast. This is probably the most recent one. Turner being about 15 minutes east of here, west of here. Out into the country, out your way? Yeah, not my way. I live in Turner. I fuck Turner. The Turner Beast is a creature that has been described as a husky-looking wolf with

bulky shoulders, big eyes, a flat snout, short-mangled ears, and a bushy tail. Before it was proven to be a hybrid, some researchers claimed that it could possibly be a dire wolf. It was spotted in Turner, Maine, which estimated to weigh about 120 pounds. It has been known to kill pets and livestock, mostly dogs, most likely for territorial reasons. Later DNA testing of the animal in the pictures revealed it to be a wolf hybrid dog. Like, I never understood the big to do about this. It clearly looked like a dog. Yeah.

There wasn't anything weird about it. It was some sort of dog who had been killed. However that might have happened Who had died in the woods Thought they found it on the side of the road I don't know Yeah I thought they found it on the side of the road It looked like it was in a grass area

Maybe on the side of the road But I mean there's grass everywhere So clearly then it got hit by a car Yeah maybe big old dog I mean there's bigger real dogs bigger than that thing So this lady said that was her dog That the Turner Beast was her dog Yeah so I've attached a Sun Journal article about it

He was a wolf hybrid chow mix A hybrid chow mix. Name Wolfie. Of course it's named Wolfie. But scientists said this dog was a male that they found in. She said Wolfie was female. I don't know how somebody would make confusion about that. Either her being confused about her dog sex or the biologist,

but this just seems kind of weird. Also, it doesn't look like a chow at all. No, I mean, a little bit does. Most chows are that kind of brownish color, but I could kind of see it. Yeah, I mean, the picture looks like it's jet, black and it looks like some type of, I don't know, standard poodle mix or some shit. I don't know, but they said it was a charcoal gray color and she's like, oh, the picture's misleading.

I don't know. It's weird. But it'd also be weird for somebody to claim that that's their dog, produce photos of a similar looking dog and be wrong. So I don't know. Yeah, it got killed. I don't know what they did with the body because they said they had no DNA samples of it because she wanted to test DNA samples that she had of her dog with the body that was

found. but I guess they didn't have the body anymore. I don't know. They probably buried it or cremated or something. Yeah, probably. I would just think that they would have taken some sort of... Sample for posterity? Yeah, exactly, especially since this was starting to think it was a cryptozoology creature.

I don't know, maybe it got sold to like some sort of cryptozoologist and it's in a freezer somewhere. Maybe it's possible. Yes. Those are our main tails. Those are main tales. Not to be confused with veggie tails. Oh, no. I didn't expect this to go this long.

I didn't either. I thought we were really going to have to elaborate on. a lot of this, but apparently not. I guess not. So thanks for everyone who stuck around. If you're listening on YouTube, like and subscribe. If you're listening on iTunes, please leave us a five-star review and a written review and subscribe. And if you want to receive postcards or more from us and hear all of our secret episodes, you should consider donating to our Patreon where you will get all this stuff. Yeah, we have a whole bunch of really cool postcards. Uh-huh. And Yergi might make some more herself. Yeah, we got some

on Amazon. We got some really cool sea creature ones. We got some local ones from Quiet City books. Yep, we got some Edward Gorey ones and then all the local ones from Quiet City books are main based. Yeah, so there are places from around here. Yeah. You get a little piece of Maine from where Drewby and Yergy

are. But we'll probably drop in there again soon to see what other postcards she has because I generally like the stuff there. And if you're local, you should go see Courtney there. It is awesome. Yes, it's on Lisbon Street. The nice part. It's Stop. Jesus. Elizabeth Street people get stabbed.

No, they don't. No, they don't. I don't know. But it's located right underneath Boba, which you should also visit, which is a Vietnamese place. Yes, except every time I ask them to make something gluten-free, 50% of the time, they don't make it gluten-free. I don't know. You can order on DoorDash now, and an option is gluten-free. So if we door-dashed it, perhaps, they'll get it because it's written down that it's gluten-free.

I mean, I've called it in every time, every time, and half of the time. It's gluten-free, half of the time, it's not. Because they'll put deep-fried onions on it. And I'm just like, okay, these clearly aren't gluten-free because you don't have a gluten-free dedicated friar. Regardless. I really like your stuff. Just please, when I make orders, make the gluten-free.

Stop poisoning, Jervy. Yeah, because I keep, as soon as I see those onions, I'm just like, oh, all right, and I have to give it away. Please, I like your fah. We should go in there and eat some time and then go down to Quiet City. Maybe. So we can make a stink if there's onions on top. Yeah.

Well, the problem is, is I don't know if they use cinnamon in their, in their fah, too. All fa has cinnamon in it. Okay, well, I shouldn't eat it anyways. I'm allergic to cinnamon, too. But it doesn't get me sick all the time if I have in small amounts, but still, I just would rather eat clean. Why am I coming up so quiet? This is weird. For the first time, Drewby's got to choke up on his mic.

But it's all the way up. It's right up against my mouth. I don't know. We're going on. Anyways. Anyways. All right, we love you. Bye.

Love you, bye