The Morning Stream - TMS 2176: The Crown's Gambit

Episode Date: September 20, 2021

A Dramedy? That's A Camel, Right? Up your nose with a glowy hose. National Air Bender Day. I Say Keep the Damn Ottoman. Does that letter give good lumbar support. Are Space Orks Sporks? Handsome, Bald, and Famous. The Michelin Man Made Us Dinner and Still Has Fat Rolly Arms. Hot Cockles. You can't see my fingers at home. Take The Turkey in the other Room. I Can Eat 11 Nails and Fart the Longest. Poor neglected Hamilton. It doth was not Jennifer. Just a Saber with Bill. Y The Last Stephen and more on this episode of The Morning Stream. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Coming up on TMS, Adromedy, that's a camel, right? Up your nose with a glowy hose. It's National Airbender Day. I say keep the damn ottoman. Does that later give good lumbar support? Our space orcs, sporks. Handsome, bald, and famous. The Michelin man made us dinner, and he still has fat, roly arms.

Hot cockles! No, hot cockles! He can't see my fingers at home. Take the turkey in the other room. I can eat 11 nails and fart the longest. Poor neglected Hamilton. It doth was not, Jennifer. Just a saber with Bill. Why the Last Stephen and more on this episode of The Morning Stream.

How'd you do that? I can't tell you. Why not? Magicians can't tell secrets. Why not? Anyway, I got to go practice some more. I wouldn't eat a box of cream discs. The Morning Stream.

Why did I take the blue pill? Why indeed. Hey, everybody. Welcome back to TMS. It's the morning stream for Monday, the 20th of September, 2021. Ooh, we got a 920, 20, 21. Ooh, 2021, 20, 20, 20 more hours to go. I want to be sedated.

Nice. Yeah, I guess every month we'll have a 28 in it, and it's dumb for me to be bringing it up. So I'll stop doing that now. Hey, look, next year, though, on February 22nd, we do get a 2222. Yeah, we should celebrate that. That should be good. That'll be good.

What do you want to do that day that's special? Anything? Let's have tacos because it'll be a Taco Tuesday. Oh, I see. Okay, I'm in. Oh, yeah, Dice Tomato tomorrow is Earth Wind and Fire Day. What? Do you remember?

Really? The 21st night of September. earth wind and fire yeah so it's so it's it's uh it's national uh airbender day is what you're saying earth wind and fire got it okay oh there you go yes exactly uh so wait is that true there's a day named after the band earth wind and fire is that true did you hear what i just sang no yeah you sing the oh because that's the but we don't call that earthwind and fire day do we or is that official or do we just we're just saying that because that's well i mean we're going to call it september i don't know that's the name of the song most covered

song of all time, Amber? No, no, it's definitely not. Yesterday is the most cover. According to the Guinness Book World Records, yesterday by the Beatles is the most covered song of all time. I question that. I think that's something that somebody made up

and I don't buy it. In my library, I fought the law and in your eyes are the most covered songs. I fought the law and the law won that one. That song? Why is that so heavily covered? What a It's been around for a long time.

It's a very, very easy chord progression and lyrics also pretty easy to remember. It's like you pick up a guitar, and if you're not trying to figure out the opening lick to stairway to heaven, you're like, and you just go right into breaking rocks in the hot sun. I fought the law and the law one. Okay, well, I take your word for it more than most because you know the, You know a lot of covers. Yeah. Yesterday, I'm sure, is no slouch.

I'm sure it's up there. It's up there. But I really don't have that many covers of it. I don't really have that many good covers of it. Oh, that reminds me. I meant to ask last week. While you were in Ireland, did you see anything to do with the Guinness Book of World Records, which is based on the beer people?

Oh, right. Yeah. Do you see any of that? Yeah, as a matter of fact, no. No, I didn't. We went to the Guinness Storehouse and took the Guinness Tour. Yeah. But no mention, even in the Guinness.

Guinness Storehouse, no mention of the Guinness Book of World Records. Really? Not even like, here in the gift shop, there's a copy of the latest. We're related, yeah, tangentially related to the Guinness Book of World Records. No, none of that. Weird. Because that is the source of it all. Maybe they're embarrassed by it now. And they have a huge gift shop, like big. Yeah. I wanted to bring back some glasses, because I really do like the shape of Guinness glasses that you get from directly from them. It's not just the narrow at the bottom, then It's wider at the top. Yeah.

They've got little indentations on the bottom, like little grippy indentations that are like, oh, that's kind of fun to hold. It's a fun glass to hold. It still does the bottom to the top, you know, getting wider. But it's kind of like a Coke glass, like the famous Coke style glasses. I do like a good, I like a good curvy bottle. I'm a fan, or glass rather. Okay, well, that's interesting.

Do you, okay, this brought up another thought. I was watching a cooking show with Kim, and she loves that stuff. One of these Stanley Tucci things or something. Was it a great night? No, what was the name of that Stanley Tucci movie? Well, no, it's an actual, he does a documentary on food on HBO Max now. Oh, okay. I forgot the name of it.

Oh, right. I saw that, yes. But he's sort of Anthony Bordaining around the world talking to Italian this and this. Wow, how did he get that gig? Yeah. Well, you've got to be a handsome, bald. Oh, we're almost there. What else?

So far so good Are you a famous, are you a famous, well-known actor I've been around and working for decades? Oh, no, I'm not. Ah, shit, well, then you're out. But anyway, can you speak Italian? Italian is the other thing, because that guy talks it. Oh, no, I can't speak any language.

I barely speak this one. Well, anyway, he's walking around, and they're talking about Michelin stars and, you know, the fanciest restaurants. And when I hear that now, now, ever since learning that the Michelin Star thing is from the Michelin Tire people, it seems less cool you know what I mean it's like it's like oh this fancy

this French restaurant it seems less cool though because think of it it's like here at la frante hooha we have only the finest five Michelin star of dining blah blah blah I'm like okay that sounds great but freaking Michelin the Michelin man did he show up with all his tires

on him his rolly fat white things and go here you go you're a Michelin star person Like, it just makes it seem cheaper. Welcome to the awards ceremony for excellence in podcasting. Brought to you by Popsockets. But you know what I mean? It's so revered. Yes.

No, I get it. No, I totally know what you mean. In my opinion, the Michelin Star name is the big entity and the Michelin Tires now is the sub. As opposed to it being the other way around. Yeah, I guess, I mean, that is what happened. that new restaurant or that restaurant, that chef that opened up a new restaurant, Denver, has two Michelin stars from other restaurants. Oh, we got to go there. Yeah.

Oh, yeah, by the way, they also make tires. Yeah, but imagine if it said, you've got three Chevy stars at your restaurant or you got, you know, it just sounds dumb. It just sounds dumb. Discount tire company sponsored that great restaurant or awarded that great restaurant? Yeah, it doesn't make any sense to me. I get you. I get you. But it's a long, I understand that it's also.

you know, a long-standing thing, and it was established at a time where no other sort of measuring stick existed, and it did have a high standard, and I get it, but... Claire brings up a very funny thing, I'm going to piggyback off of her joke and kind of, like, what if at the Guinness Storehouse

tour in Dublin, the only people who could serve you your stout at the end of the tour are people who are in the Guinness Book of World Records for something. That'd be great. So it's like, you know, the guy who can swallow 11 nails or

who can fart the longest or something like that. Yeah. Oh, you don't want that guy handing your beer, though. No, you probably don't. Maybe not that guy. What about the guy? Oh, this guy's had post-nasal drip for 14 years. You don't want that guy. That guy, right. Exactly. Yeah, none of them. It want to be the tall guy or the short guy or the... Sure, yes, exactly.

The guy with the most, I don't know. The woman who's birthed the most children. Just get her out of the house. for a little bit. Get her away from that husband and get her serving stouts. Oh, that. I wonder who holds the record for that.

And I wonder how they feel. Like, do their guts just fall out on them every day? Or like, how's that going? Let's see. She's probably one of those TV things, right? Like, uh, what was that family that, that had all the kids,

they were like a, it was like a sort of a reality show, a recent reality show. And they calculated that she's been pregnant for 90% of her life or something. Oh my gosh. Or 90% of her life since turning 18. The Duggers? Is that it?

The Duggers? I think that's it. Okay. Hadn't heard about that. Okay. Here I found her. Here it is on the Guinness Booker World Records site. Mrs. Valaveva.

I can't say her name right. She is a Russian. Valvazilla. Probably that. 69 kids. How is it possible? Hold on a second. Oh, no, no.

When she got to 60, I just say, that's enough. Okay, 27 births, 69 children, second wife, eight births, 18 children. What does that mean eight births, 18 children? Oh, oh, gotcha. So she had, she's had eight births,

but they were all multiples. Oh. Or maybe not all multiples, but like had quintuplets or quadruplets. Right. I think you're right. This was... Yeah, I didn't even think about that

being a way to kind of really buck the system. and work your way into the Guinness Book of World Records is having multiples. Yeah. No kidding. And she lived to... I got it. She lived to 76. That's pretty good for a lady who's been just shitting them out for her whole life.

Right. Well, you know, eight births, there are people who have way more births, but way fewer kids. So she did it right. She worked smarter, not harder. There you go. she had she had eight extremely unpleasant days yeah but uh she had the most of the most efficient uterus on the planet my gosh right exactly yes get more done with less time it's like uh the henry ford of uh of pregnancies that sounds about right um so i have uh we had emies yesterday

uh i don't know if you're familiar with the emies but they're a thing they go on every year they are They did, they were a thing. And the big winner of the night for me, Conan O'Brien. Oh, I keep hearing. He did something funny, but I didn't watch. So what do you do? He Conan bombed. I mean, I don't know if that's, if that's a new hashtag today.

It should be, though. He Conan bombed the Emmys for the entire night. And I don't mean he bombed. I mean, like, did the equivalent of photo bombing. when the president of the Academy of TV Arts and Sciences or something was announced, and everybody's like, oh, this is a good time to go to the bathroom. Conan stood up, cheered like it was like Jesus Christ was coming out on stage. Oh, man.

And saluted, and the whole, like it threw the gaffe. He had this whole speech about, yeah, the Academy of TV Arts and Scientists were blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. and Conan was clapping and cheering and cracking the whole audience up. And then he actually got up with, pretended to be part of Stephen Colbert's team when Stephen Colbert went up to accept his Emmy for a live show or something. Well, who hosted? Was it, did anyone host? Who hosted this thing?

Yes. Sorry, I dropped my pen. Cedric the Entertainer hosted. What? Really? Yes. Cedric the Entertainer. Hey, 19th, late 90s.

What's going on? He's currently on that new show with Schmidt from New Girl. Yeah? Okay. I don't know what I was like a weird pick to me. I don't know why. It was fine. It was kind of a weird pick, but he was all right.

Yeah, there was one, like they kept some of the skits to a minimum. There was one where they superimposed him in the water in Florida when Brady was Huckin the Heisman Trophy to Grunk or Beck or whoever it was and it dropped into the water and they superimposed him there. But then they also did a skit with never won an Emmy

like a support group for people who've never won an Emmy and you had Scott Bacula Jason Alexander Zoe Day Chanel Um Jason Alexander Amazing Jason Alexander

Listen I was nominated eight times For Castanza I can't remember who else was in that skit. But it was actually, that was, it was pretty funny. Hold on. Was Bacula nominated a bunch of times and never won? Is that the deal with that? I don't think Bacula, I don't know how many times he's been nominated.

Oh, Alison Hannigan, that's right. She was the other one. Yeah, I don't know how many times Bacula has been nominated, but. He must have been, right? He was nominated. I didn't, it wasn't like a, we've been nominated a bunch of times. It was like, we've been around in the business a long time. Oh.

Because Jordan, Jason Alexander was pushing the whole. like I've been nominated a bunch of times. Oh, gotcha, yeah. Because he was definitely nominated. He just never could seem to eco win. Right. Wow. All right.

Well, it sounds like I may have missed a little bit of fun there. I don't know. Hollywood fun. That part was fun. The two things that were the best were the, DeColon O'Brien, constant jumping around and getting attention. And what else? I mean, that skit was pretty good.

Yeah. Here, I'll rip through the winners. Yeah, let's rip through the winners we can talk about it. So the big winner of the night, really, is that Queen's Gambit, sorry, the Queen, the Queen, the Queen did real good. The Crown? The Crown? I meant the Crown. I meant the Crowns Gambit. That's what, the Crowns Gambit. That all went real well. Took away, what, eight? Hold on. I had it written down.

Yeah. Nope. Seven honors for that. TV's Apple TV Plus's Ted Lasso claimed four, while HBO Max is hacks and HBO's mayor of Easttown, both picked up three each. Also very, you know, it was a great, it was a great night for the Brits, right? Kate Winslet and the Crown and Queens Gambit. Yeah. No, I guess, Anya Taylor Joy, is she British? I think she is.

I don't know what she is. She's the Vivich. She's Alien is what she is. Yeah, she's the Vivich with the 2V. She's the Vavich, yes. Let's see, okay, so limited series of Queens Gambit one overall, and I think that's a real tight race. I think Mary of East Town was probably the best thing I was. all year so it's hard for me to

it's further emphasis that if you haven't watched hacks yet you need to watch it because it is so good Gene Smart is brilliant She's smart and good I like her life she's smart Gene Smart man look at all these I don't know if you've noticed all of these categories

where all these nominations happen 90% of these are streaming yeah 5% of them are cable and the paltry leftovers are regular television regular TV barely does shit anymore like what do we even have those networks for what are you doing I know it's like

this is us I think was the only thing I remember oh blackish got nominated as well but yeah so few things blackish so few things everything else is is either streaming and it's funny because they they have different categories

or different definitions for HBO versus HBO Max there's stuff you can see on HBO but not see or I'm sorry HBO Max that you can't see on HBO just if you have it yeah if you're just watching it's kind of funny to me that HBO like you can still get a cable pay for cable and you have to wait until your show is on on HBO to watch it yeah but you do get don't you get max as part of HBO if you have HBO so I think so yeah so but it's still weird right that's weird it is weird right because there's you know uh it's very weird let's just let's just you know well we can't right

because we need news. I was going to say, let's just get rid of terrestrial and make it all streaming, but I guess we do need our news and our sports. Yeah, but also there's no reason why network TV couldn't get back to making really great quality stuff. They just aren't. Yeah, it feels like they just have more restrictions. I think they gave up.

And a lot of them already own all this other shit anyway. I mean, FX is a Fox network, which is now a Disney network, which, you know, everybody owns everything now. But, like, you know, they're doing their best work in places that aren't. Like, even, I would even argue Peacock has cooler stuff upcoming than NBC puts out on the air. Without a doubt. We're living in a weird time, you guys.

We are. Let's see. The Crown won for drama series. So not the Queen, not the Queen's Gambit. The Crown is a different deal. They beat out the boys, Bridgetton, Handmaids, Lovecraft Country, the Mandalorian Pose, and this is us.

Let's see, comedy series, Ted Lasso from Apple TV Plus. That seemed like a, if that wasn't going to win, then we were all doing something wrong. Right. Deb Ted Lasson get nominated so many different areas. And how do you have on that list is Cobra Kai? How are they a comedy? Are they a comedy? Yeah. Well, yeah. That's weird. I don't like it.

They're not drama. Well. Dramity. They're dromedy. Yeah. Okay. I hate that term dramedy, but I'll say it. Yeah, I do too. I mean, you could argue that, you know, the boys is as comedic as cobra kai right yeah i mean it's more like a sardonic but yeah you're right in a in a sarcastic way or a sardonic is good yeah or or maybe even um what's the word there's another word for that parody or it's more edgy it's it's uh darker dark comedy got it there you go dark

dark um all right where are we now oh here we go so ted lasso beating out everybody there uh sorry pin 15 I like you, but you got beat. Lead actress in a drama, Olivia Coleman, who just wins everything every time she's in it, so that's just the rule. They only give her the prize so that they can hear her acceptance speech. It's funny because they had the London annex of the Emmys, right? Because with COVID and testing, or not testing, but quarantines and stuff like that, they really couldn't bring a lot of actors and actresses from London over here for the Emmys.

So they just had their own separate little area, like their own little bar in London that they were all hanging out in. And Tina's like, you know, it's like four in the morning there. Because they're having to do that live and do their acceptance speeches. And so how anybody can come up with a coherent thought for their acceptance speech at four in the morning. That shows what good actors they are seeing. It does, yes, exactly. Really taps into it.

A real quick thought on that. I guess this morning they lifted travel restrictions from the UK to the U.S. now. so they could have all made it here had it been a week later that's right uh it's kind of funny seeing uh jillian anderson except for the crown for supporting actress and i always forget that her real voice sounds way more like scully than it does you know her sex education or the crown or like she would she grew up in britain but i think was born in the u.s or canada or something she had her foot in both places so she just got a really good command over both things, but her natural speaking voice is more like, Mulder, you know that

there's no such things. Exactly. Yeah. Did she give a shout out to? Like cigarettes in here. She gave a shout out to DeCovny? Probably not. No.

Just want to say special thanks to my old pal. David Dukhne for years of whatever. All right. Well, good for her. She's amazing. She's really good. She's great. Yeah.

What else we got here? Let's see. We got Josh O'Connell. Connor for the crown there. You got lead actress Gene Smart from Hacks, a thing you told me to watch, which I will. Jason Sadecas for Ted Lassau. Well done

lead actor in a comedy. Lead actress, limited series, movie, anthology, went to Kate Winslet for Mayor of East Town. Highly very much deserved. She's amazing in that. Lead actor, limited series movie anthology. You and McGregor for Halston, which I've not watched. No, of all of these, like we've

seen Wanda Vision, the undoing, Hamilton. Boy, Poor Hamilton, just, you know, just hardly gets any sort of recognition, really. No one ever talks about Hamilton, just, you know. No one ever talks about Hamilton. It's just so sad to see this great play go under the radar so completely and totally. Yeah, that thing, for everyone's, for the record, they're nominated and everything here, so they just didn't win. He also teased the upcoming Obi-1 deal, and that's cool.

Oh, yeah. I'm excited about that. He seemed to think people are going to like it. He said, well, of course he would. He's in it. But, you know, you never know. Let's see. Who else we got here?

We got your, uh, your Hannah Wet Waddingham from Ted Lassow. She's your, um, she's the, she's the, she's, she's, any Lennox. She plays Annie Lennox on, uh, Ted Lassow. She's also on, she's also on sex education, I noticed. I've forgotten she was in that. Oh, yeah. Not this, not season three, though. No, season two.

She's a somebody's mom. Right. I think. Kim's when we were watching that. I saw her on there. Whoa. Does she have a box of cookies with her, biscuits, sorry, whatever you call him?

I don't know what you call him over there. Oh, the, um, the, right, the shortbreads. Shortbread, there you go. Uh, you got your Brett Goldstein for Ted Lassow. He's your, he's your, uh, what's his name? Your, uh, angry little, uh, soccer man. What's his name?

Roy. Yes, sir. That's Roy. Isn't that Roy? I think Brett Goldstein is Roy. Roy Kent? No, unfortunately. Only that's Brendan Hunt, I think.

Oh, I thought that was, no, the chat's saying it's Roy Kent. I don't know. Oh. I think it's, I saw him talk at a thing. Didn't he, or I saw a video of him standing up thanking people and stuff. It is Roy Kent, right? Right? That actor?

No, it's, does he play Roy Kent? I'm thinking of his, the Ted Lasso's sidekick. Oh, the coach. The coach is who I'm thinking of, yes. Oh, okay. That's who I wanted to win, yes. But no, he is the angry little soccer player. There is Brett Goldstein.

Yeah, he's great. Jeremy Swift is who you're thinking of. That's what I'm thinking of. Yeah, Coach Beard. Coach Beard is amazing. That's who I wanted to win out of that group. Yeah. He would have gotten, if he would have won,

that's winning with way less work than anyone else. You know what I mean? And I'd not be smirching him for that. He's awesome. Right. But he's not hardly doing anything, and that would have been amazing. No, he makes acting look effortless is what the thing is.

Writing When I May Destroy You, the Queen's Gambit for directing. Some of these were getting into the weeds here. Supporting actress Julianne, Nicholson for Mayor of Easttown. She's really good. She's the best friend that is kind of for a while, not the best friend. Yeah. She was also very good on the outsider. Very good on there.

Oh, yeah, I forget about that. She was, well, what's his name's wife? I can't think of his name. I can't think of his name. Justin Bateman. That's what I was going to say. that can be his character uh supporting actor evan peters from air east town the crowns quix silver yeah yeah yeah that's great he was as close as we got to anything winning from one division was uh evan peters getting the uh best

supporting actor he is good in that though he's very good in it in arveeastern he's fantastic yes well deserved the limited series supporting actor is riddled with hamilton people and then right yeah my gosh and Evan Peter uh you know uses his quick silver power to dash in there and and make it uh there's a ton of other stuff we mentioned gillian anderson uh let's see let me skip ahead here last week with john oliver won for the variety series that has been especially good this year i think it has now he's out of the uh the void the empty void he's back in front of an audience in your competition series you got ruPaul's drag race is the winner over amazing race nailed it top chef and the voice and for variety you got stephen cobert's election night

2020 coverage yep that's the one where uh Conan o'brien went up with them and helped accept it uh acting like he was a member of the crew like yeah good job oh yeah good job you were you were great yeah yeah oh and then outstanding variety special we got um Hamilton finally got at the big win finally uh whew poor hamilton you know finally got some finally got some recognition i will say that 846 Chappelle stand-up is really good. It's really funny. Did you watch the West Wing special? No, I did not.

Apparently, I didn't even know that thing existed until it was nominated until they went through the nominations. I'm like, oh, wow, that's cool. I didn't know it happened until I just saw it here and you talked about it. So this is news. I'm a huge West Wing fan, so I'll have to check that out. All right. Well, there you have it.

That's all she wrote for the Emmys. That means there's still time for us to have a little competition today. and to do that we have to bring in our old pal Brian Dunaway He lives in a far off land known as South Carolina Where the water runs freely The grass grows high The dogs lick their own junk

It's a beautiful place It's hot, it's muggy It's uh I can't think of anything that rhymes with muggy So I'll not try Anyway here it is Hey look who it is it's Brian Dunaway Hi, welcome back.

Oh, hi, Scott and Ryan. Oh, hi. Did they bring your chair? Oh, hello. How's your chair doing? Why are you so evil, Scott? You know the answer to that? You know, they didn't bring my chair?

They didn't even call me. I had to call them. And then they were all like, they were all like, we don't know where your chair's answer. Oh, no. Really? After all that, we're like, what, a week later after the first attempt or something? That's bad. Yes.

That is bad. Thank you. Thank you, J.B. Hunt. I like, like, okay, this is my rule. when we agree to meet someplace, we're both making an agreement. And when you don't come and the follow-up, I am making the concessions. If you have to do it a third time, you're making the concessions. But they don't because they're a shipping company and they can just stick it to me.

As a matter of fact, they just said, we're not even going to schedule it until it arrives at our location. And I'm like, so you don't even know where it's at then. Okay. Didn't you just say that? Exactly. Why'd you just admit it that you've lost my chair. We should Twitter bomb them and give them hell, man. I don't want to be that guy today.

I want to be that guy today. I want to be that guy. Look, I've already told them. I've already told on them. I've already went. I talked to corporate. They just gave me the sorries. And then I talked to the originating retailer who sent the product.

And they sent a little letter. So I feel okay. Well, as long as you've got a letter, that's good. Oh, yeah, that's well worth it if you got the letter. Can you sit on that letter? Yeah, can you adjust it? Brian, does that letter have good lumbar support? How are you going to get, what's going on with that letter?

The retailer who sold me the product is great. I love the retailer. And they took total ownership and said, yeah, that's our fault. We're getting touch with J.B. They took total ownership of it. And so they seem to take care of it. They gave me a complete refund. Now I have to ship an Ottoman back, which has been sitting in my living room.

and it's the matching ottoman to it. No, you have to send that back. I say keep the damn Ottoman. Screw them. But they pay for the shipping return and all that stuff. They even offer to have J.B. Hunt come out and pick up my ottoman. I was like, don't you put those. Don't you let those people. Yeah, don't let them in my house. Those liars. Those lying sacks.

All right, well, I've been following this from afar and just feeling your pain. And I guess I'm glad. Hey, man, it's the time of COVID. It's hard to get truck drivers. I get all that. All I ask for is clear communication, transparency, just be honest with me don't ask me to make a bunch of

concessions if you're not willing to at least make some concessions yourself that's all I ask for I get it that's an equitable request for life I don't think you're wrong in asking it it's fine all right well I'm glad you're here we're going to play a game we're going to try to win some prizes for some people who will have them delivered very

efficiently okay they're not going to be a problem we hope Brian you want to involving J.B. Hunt on the delivery of these prizes So, Brian, you should explain this and who might win and all that. I'll do all that stuff. Welcome to the morning squirm. It's a back-and-forth trivia game where our players will match wits on topics that Cliff Clavin would have offered up the cheers bar. Scott and, well, if he was a little bit dirtier.

Scott and Brian will take turns answering multiple-choice trivia questions, and if they get it wrong, the other player gets a point. The player with the most points after five questions wins the prize for their contestant, and we've pulled contestants from members of the Tadpool that aren't able to listen. Scott, you're going to be playing for Dan from McDonough, Georgia. Oh. Oh. He's a Georgia man. Yeah.

Yeah. Brian, you're playing for Jamie, aka TMS mashups. Yeah. Yeah. From Vancouver, Canada. Oh. Yeah. I'm proud to play for Jamie.

Yeah. I am too. Yeah. I'm proud to pay for Dan, but I would also play for Jamie if it came down to it. But Dan, I'm excited. I'm excited to play for Dan. And who you're playing for, Scott? It's Dan.

His name is Dan. Oh, well, Dan lives in Georgia. Maybe Dan knows where my chair's at. Yeah, maybe he does. Yeah. Listen, if he helps find your chair, then I'll just give him the prizes right now. Sure. Sure.

Well, look, we'll break rules to make things right. Justice is what matters. That's right. All right. So, last time around, I think Scott won. So we're going to give this first one to Brian Dunaway. Oh. Brian.

Hot cockle. Hot Cawcles was a popular kids game in the 1500s that involved beating a blindfolded player until what happened. How old do you think I am? That is a real throwback. It is. Don't you remember playing this, Brian? All right. They would beat a blindfolded player until one of the following happened, which is it?

A, he passed out. B, he went home crying. C, he correctly guessed who was punching. him, or D, he was able to dodge a punch. Oh, interesting. Oh, my God. All those are sound horrible. They do.

I would vote. I don't know how the game was supposed to be played, but I'm pretty sure it probably ended in kids crying and going home. So I'm going to go with that follow-up punch thing. That sounds rude. I think, yeah, so I guess you get a hit. It's kind of like spain your round. and it's disorienting you

and then they swing at you and you try to miss it. I think that sounds something dumb. So until D, he was able to dodge a punch is what you're saying. Correct. Correct. Okay. Is that the correct answer? No.

Scott gets the point. Scott, do you have a guess? Give me my remainers. Your choices are until he passed out, until he went home crying, or until he correctly guessed who was punching him.

I feel like Oh, hot cockles. Right, exactly. That's how they ended every game. By galube, it would say, at the end. All right, I'm going to say, it sounds like a, 1500 sounds like a brutal time. I'm going to say,

until you passed out. Until he passed out is incorrect. Damn it. Until he was able to correctly guess who was punching him is the correct answer. That's stupid. I think that was Jack. Ow! No, I think it was Billy.

Ow! It was Billy's too weak to swing like that. Ow, son of him. Exactly. Jennifer. Ah, I got it right. 1500s, I'm trying to think how they'd talk. Death was not Jennifer.

Dolph, Jenner, who is striking me. Up past the head. Stop it. Now, where is the Vovich? Well, I never want to play a game of hot cockles is what I learned here. No, we will not be playing that TMS Vegas. All right. Yeah.

It's an entire, I'm sorry, in its entire history, only one professional American football player has died on the field. Which sport has killed 34 participants in that same time span? Oh, my Lord. Is it? That's a lot. Is it horse racing, hockey, race car driving, or boxing? Where the participant dies. In the game or in the moment.

During the game. Right, exactly. Before your very eyes. I mean, did you say racing? You said racing? I didn't say golf. He said, yes, race car driving. Horse racing, hockey, race car driving, or boxing.

Did you say hot cockles? Hot cockles? Yes, I'm like hot cockles playing so darned. Why did you say golf? Professional hot cockles player. Did I say golf? I was joking. I was like, uh, it was just, all right.

Um, let's go. It sounds like you were about to say, did you say golf? But you didn't, didn't. Yeah. My gut tells me racing, because who else would have catastrophic? Like lots of boxers die, but it's like later after they fend, you know, oh, that gave him a tumor. He had a stroke later or whatever. But it never happens during the match.

So I'm just going to say car, I'll say car racing. Okay, race car driving. Is the answer race car driving? No, it is not. Damn it. Brian, you're remaining Yes, Brian, you get the point. Your remaining choices are horse racing, hockey, and

horse hockey, and boxing. Horse racing, hockey, and boxing. I just don't like it's hockey. I mean, it's such a violent sport, but I don't think death is used to the outcome. Boxing seems so much more likely. I'm just not sure how this question, I'm with Scott.

It feels like it's kind of phrase weird, but I'm going to go with boxing. Boxing. Is it boxing? No, it is not. It actually is horse racing. Horse racing is cold 30. 34 participants in the time.

What do you expect when you got a little short people out there riding around on horses with hooves flying around? I didn't realize that. That seems crazy to me, that number. But I guess, you know, that's a lot. It does seem crazy. Yeah, that's a lot. It gives me a different view on jockeys. Yeah.

Right. All right, Brian. Jockey, dead man walking. Jockey. In his book World Records earlier, a guy named Ryan Stock has set the world record. for shoving this object a total of 56 centimeters up his nose. 56 centimeters up his nose. Is it a glow stick, a knife, a pencil, or a tampon?

56 centimeters. Right. I'm looking at my, I'm looking at my ruler here. Hold on a second. I got to figure out how long 50s, because I don't know that. I'm not, oh my God, that doesn't even fit on here. There's not a timeline on this, like the when this happens. I was going to say the, yeah, I don't have the year.

Okay. And he stuck this 53 up his nose. 56 centimeters up his nose. He gave himself his own COVID test. Yeah. That's not even, that's outside the top of my head. No, 53 is only not like that. Yeah.

I don't know. Brian, you can't see my fingers at home. Brian, done away, I mean. I'm, uh, let's see. Here's centimeters right here. Oh, no, this is millimeters. Yeah, my centimeters is like, that would be like, it would be, it's like 22 inches. That is 22 inches.

I'm going to say that, oh, yeah, no, yeah, millimeters. I'm going to say that this information, this thing is, hold on a second. Let me, let me recheck my data. Maybe it's millimeters. Yeah, I think it might be, well, millimeters would work. That would totally work. Yeah. Hold on a second.

That's all I could picture was when you were saying is about millimeters, but yeah, centimeters is, well, it's 10 times that. Anyway, he stuck something up his nose. It was really long. I'm still seeing centimeters. Maybe it curled up and around. It curled up, you know, and maybe. Maybe that'll help you. Oh, why am I helping you?

Oh, that's interesting. Oh, okay. I know I fiddler around until I got the answer. Knife, tampon, Glow stick or pencil. Glow stick is the only thing that's flexible. I'm going to go with glow stick. All right.

Is it glow stick? Yes, it is. Yeah, you know, I was visualizing one of those siloon light sticks, you know, those ones that are short. This is one of those, like, you can use as a bracelet and wrap it around. I've put the video in our Discord chat. Oh, there's a video? It has to be because I'm sure he, like, take pictures of that glowing in the dark. Oh, my gosh.

This is real. It is real. Yeah. Oh, my hell. Okay. Chat, hold on. Yeah. Yeah, you got to show that.

my god i mean that that's it's it's going down his throat and probably i think it's a bit stressed to call him a man or even a human really i mean look at this how okay let me skip ahead some that's the close no so where is this going then down his throat down his throat it's got to be got to be oh that makes my nose hurt yeah it does i hate everything about this look how fast it is too why is he why is he why did he just Sharpie his nose? Oh, it was the dude to market, yeah. No one touch it now. Right, exactly.

Yes. Earn that Glowstick head next. That's why. That's quite that's quite the new COVID test. I don't think I care for that. Yeah, I don't like that new self-done COVID test. Not cool. And all you do is you just sit the glowstick on your nose.

Yeah. All right. When we did our, when we did our tests in Dublin, we actually they did the swab that was like the big back of your sinuses. Oh, yeah. Every other time I've had it done or done it to myself, they said, yeah, half an inch into your nose, five spins around, 15 seconds.

But man, when they did it in Dublin, it was like, gr-hmm. Wow. Right that, don't you? All right. So Brian gets the point on that one. It's now two to one. Scott, this one's going to you. All right.

over 25% of daily search engine requests are people looking for what is it dieting tips advice about committing murder porn or medical advice um well porn would be the easy go-to because everyone just thinks that but i'm going to say it's medical advice all right is it medical advice come on no it is right damn it gets the point when you said to murder one you said how to commit murder or how to do a murder was that what you said or yeah how to murder or medical porn no medical porn dieting tips advice about committing murder and porn are three remaining choices dieting porn got it all right see I just don't think I just don't who's searching for porn you know where is that that's a really good point yeah So, I don't know.

If you're some, I don't know, you're some lonely 60-year-old and you're just, you're not real computer savvy. I mean, what are you doing? I'm finally going to do it. I'm going to look at porn on the Internet. I'm doing it. Google, where is porn? Where is it show me porn? I'll show grandma.

I'm to porn near me. She won't give me any. I'll show her. Damn it, Grandma. I want to go with dieting tips I think about it every day go ahead

that's true is it dieting tips no it is not it's getting medical sometimes if it looks like a duck and walks like a duck it is porn wow that just seemed like the too easy answer but it was right it does

I think that's and it was it was in here to kind of throw you off with like the other ones like oh well what if it is his medical advice, you know? Yeah. Dang it. All right. All right.

Okay. Well, it's three to one. Brian's one, but you can still redeem yourself. It's kind of a related question. So, Scott, this one will go to you. All right. Speaking of searching for porn on the internet, what's the most popular holiday of the year for viewing porn? Is it?

Halloween, Christmas Day, New Year's Day, or Thanksgiving? What's the most popular holiday for people to search for porn? I have a visual image for all of those entries for some reason. And it's always a stepmom. Stepmom hands out candy. So stepmom serves turkey. Do you say Christmas Day, not Christmas Eve? Christmas Day and New Year's Day.

So Halloween, Christmas Day, New Year's Day, Thanksgiving. All right, here's my thinking, and here's why I'm answering this way. Okay. I think it's Christmas Day because Christmas Day has a malaise to it that's hard to describe. It's like, oh, it's over now. And we've got to throw all this tree out and clean up all this stuff. It's over now. I might as well masturbate.

I'm going to go, I'm going to go try to take my mind off this, and that's how they do it. So I'm going to say Christmas Day. All right. Is it Christmas Day? No, it is not. I would have thought the same, too, because that's the time people are. most likely they kill themselves. And I think people are trying to find some type of, you know, just some type of life,

some type of reason to, you know, to move forward. Look, it's either porn or suicide. I'm going out one way or the other. Let's do it. Plus, I mean, you just got that new computer and you got a really good point. Right. You just got a new device for searching for porn. Right.

So I'm just going to go. I'm going to go with my answer that makes me laugh the most. I think it's going to be Thanksgiving after all the people are fat and bloated and just got through greasy all greasy on Thanksgiving you just fall asleep halfway through because of the trip to fan you're just like I'm gross let's just go ahead and put a topper on this I'm going to look at some porn

oh that turkey sure looked good uh Brian you are absolutely correct it is Thanksgiving the most popular holiday you're nasty humans yeah take the turkey in the other room and leave it alone everybody's in the kitchen I'll just look up. Is that what the problem is? Is all the people, all the

women in the kitchen? Okay, that's wrong. But still, is that the theory? Yeah, maybe. Maybe everybody else leaves. You're sitting watching football in a couch. Yeah. Now's my chance. Yeah, this is your chance. Oh, man, my favorite aunt is coming over for things.

Oh, man. Oh, if you've got emails to write, write them to Brian, not to me. All right, well, there's, that is a horrifying, horrifying quiz that we've just done. Yeah. It is. And congratulations to Brian Dunaway and to TMS mashups.

We did, Jamie. A couple of great games, courtesy of Steam. It is super hot and war groove, both of those super hot and my favorite thing on the Oculus still. Oh, yeah, that's awesome. But don't worry, Dan, from McDonough, Georgia. You're also getting something cool. You're getting Rising Storm 2, Vietnam, plus two DLCs for that game. So you guys are both getting some great prizes.

You're both winners, really. Winner, winner, chicken dinner. I mean, I'm the loser today, but everyone else won. It's fine. Everybody wins but me is the point. Everybody but Scott. That's right. I would argue humanity is lost after that last question.

I think so. Yeah, you're not. Butterball has lost after that last question. That's still a brand I can go get a turkey, right? Yeah, you can still get a butterball. Okay. I used to think that that was fake. Butterball still has the hotline, I think you can call on Thanksgiving to say,

Oh, yeah. How long do I put this in the microwave? Are they still the, I mean, are they the brand? You don't, sir. Are they the brand you think of, though? Like, is it, that's what everyone does these days? That's what I think of it. Okay.

Yeah, that's the standard. They're like the, what? Yeah, who's the, who's the guy, the, it takes a tender man to handle a juicy turkey or something? that what's the um no wonder we're watching porn oh you know that you know the phrase i can't remember the phrase it is it's like a tender man it takes a it takes a it takes a butterball perdu yes peru peru wait there another turkey maker or turkey they're another turkey maker yeah they make the turkey maker they don't make no turkey nobody don't make no turkey all right uh done away well done sorry you're chairless um i hope that works itself out in the long run

Oh, it already has. Oh, it has. Money's coming back. Yeah, new chair. The deal is off. The deal is off. Go to some local mom and pop by a damn chair, the old-fashioned way. That's exactly what I'm going to do.

Good boy. Bye now. All right, there goes Brian. Oh, we're going to, I forgot to mention, we're doing the boop show tomorrow. Brian had a thing come up. And as schedules go, we had to bump that show one day. So Tuesday at 3.30 p.m. Mountain time, the boop show.

By the way, it wasn't far off. It takes a tough. man to handle a tender turkey. That's pretty good. I like tender man handling a tough turkey. A juicy turkey, yeah. It's pretty good. It takes a tough man to make a tender chicken.

There you go. Tender chickens all around, everyone, while we take a break. When we come back, it'll be Stephen Schlecker time and major spoilers as well as before him, Bill Duran, with a little bit of making things with Bill. So stick around. Brian's got a little song to stick in the middle here. What do you got? We'll do. By the way, that guy you're singing in our Discord chat is Frank Perdue. with a oh wow look at him

Frank Purdue Hey this indie in the middle by the way is brought to you by the TMS Tadpool feud it's time for another survey answer some questions and give us some content for Tadpool Feud which we play on Wednesdays here on the show

give your best answers to about 20 questions I think I've got in there and you know you you do the funny things right you throw other funny questions in there a little normal MacDonald. And they don't make it in the survey, so, you know, do that at your own risk.

But visit tiny.cc-tod-tadpool feud, all lowercase. And remember, a feud is F-E-U-D, not FU-D, or anything like that. Tadpool feud, tiny.cc-tad-pool feud, and you can submit your answers. All right. Let's get to today's India in the middle. I was stalling because I didn't have the information. I think you did great. Did I? Because I'm still looking, Scott. I don't know how well I did because...

If you're still looking, you failed miserably. I did, yes. Short of that, you went. All right. This is a band called Still Corners. They have a brand new single. It's called Heavy Days. It's out now on Wrecking Light Records.

They're going to be touring in the U.S. in 2020, and they've also rescheduled some European dates. This is a duo. So their last album was the last exit, I'm sorry, their last album was last exit, which came out, yeah, in January of 2021, this is their brand new track called Heavy Days. Again, it is a brand new single from the band Still Corners. I'm on my way You've got nothing to say But your eyes are telling me to stay

Your eyes Shimmer in silver ways your eyes telling me to stay The news is grim It's always a same Gotta turn it off to stay Same I'm on my way

You've got nothing to say But your eyes are telling me To stay shimmer in silver waves your eyes your eyes your eyes telling me to stay You know,

Ah, A A A A A A A

A Got to turn it off to stay enough to stay as well. You're going to turn it off to stay, you say. We're going to turn it off to stay, you say. You're going to turn it off to stay safe. Don't got to turn it off to stay, you say. Don't know to stay I'm going to be able to see.

Breathing is easy. Let me demonstrate. Inhale, exhale. Orange is the new black, but not in my apartment building. Kevin is the new black. This is the morning stream. All your base are belong to us. And we're back, everybody. That song one more time. That is Heavy Days by the band by the duo Still Corners. Nice.

Is that Norm MacDonald? That clip, it had to be, right? Yeah, it was one of my favorite jokes he ever told. It's one of those ones where it just feels a little dangerous. But not really, but kind of. Like, I don't know. I watched a clip, a YouTube clip of him on, was it Conan? It was where Courtney Thorn Smith from Melrose Place was a,

another guest. And she's talking about how excited she is about her brand new movie with, I call Chairman of the Board with Carrot Top. And Conan is saying, so what's the name of this film? And Nora McDowell did this. I've got a name for it. Box office poison. See, I miss.

I'm going to miss that. I'm going to miss it. For sure. He's one of the best. They did a nice little tribute to him. both the Academy and also Lauren Michaels, when started out Live One for one of their products, he gave a very teary speech.

Oh, even though they fired him. Even though they fired his ass. Oh, man. They fired him and then brought him back for... To host. To host. Which means either I've gotten funnier or their show is sucks. That's classic.

All right. Now this. Your bat caves open. I watched the episode of King of the Hill last night that had this line in it, and it throws me every time. I'll hear it, like, we're just in bed and working on something, and I hear, Mark Graves, well, I'm like, oh, what? Then I showed up. Yeah, then you showed up, and it was very awkward.

Anyway, hey, Bill DeRand, look who it is. He's calling us all the way from Punished Props.com's headquarters right there in the Seattle, Washington area. I'm going to dock you fully. We're getting down to the actual address here soon. Anyway, it's good to have you here, Bill. What's been going on in your week, Mr. Maker Man? We have a new video out over on our YouTube channel. What?

Been a couple months since we put it out, but we've been working hard on this one, and I'm super proud of it because I made a lightsaber, but it's not just a lightsaber from Star Wars. Oh, no. No, it's a Highlander lightsaber. Oh, really? Oh, wow. I made a lightsaber that looks like the katana from Highlander.

Will it take off the Kyrgyz's head? It would take this one a while to do that. It's the blade is plastic. It's all away for a while, but in theory, yes, it would definitely handle the Kyrgyn. I love this idea. Oh, also, I can tell how we're filming this, the move is over. You've moved. This is a new space.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, and that's back in the old basement, old basement new shop. Yeah. I was going to say it looks great. It looks really nice in there. Doesn't look as cavernous as the old shop used to look. Right. Yeah. We, I mean, we've had time to really think about how everything's going together, especially decorating so that the background of the videos have a lot of really fun stuff. Yeah, it looks awesome. Okay, well, very cool. Describe this thing. I'm curious mostly where the inspiration came from.

At what point were you sitting around going, you know what'd be cool, the Highlander's sword but as a lightsaber it's a weird combo actually I don't know why I didn't think of this before but a Kergan Darth Vader mashup costume would be awesome Oh yeah no kidding

There you go Anyway So it started with the handle The handle of the Lightaber I made is the handle from the katana from Highlander I made a Highlander video a few months ago And a fan reached out and said

Hey you like Highlander I have a mold you can borrow So he mailed me silicone mold that he had his hands on. I don't know how he got it. The mold was a production used silicone mold from the movie Highlander 2, which came out in 1991. The mold is a, it's a 30-year-old mold, and it still works so that the handle I ended up

casting for this thing is super legit. It's literally the same as the one from Highlander 2 from the movie. Wow. So that's wicked cool. And that's kind of where it started. So he sent me that. He sent me some guards, too. He cut out of brass.

And I do want to eventually make a katana, like a real metal blade that looks almost exactly like it's from the movie. However, I also had an inch to make a lightsaber at the time. So I thought before then, before I make the bladed metal katana, I want to make a lightsaber too. Yeah, combine your passions, man. Mush them together. Why not? absolutely total total mashup two of my favorite things i don't own i only have one lightsaber that's not enough light sabers it can be only one yeah my gosh so um so yeah

decided to make it into a lightsaber the the handle like i said i had that mold the handle was slush cast so you pour some resin in there and you sort of slushed around to coat the inside of the mold uh that can be a hollow casting on the handle so i could jam a bunch of electronics in there which are very necessary for a lightsaber sure i don't think you got much of a lightsaber if you don't have light coming out of it, you know? No, it's just a stick. It's just a saber. Yeah.

It's just a saber. The electronics that we did, speaking of the light portion, that was a kit that I purchased. And there are several companies out there that sell lightsaber parts. And I'm here to tell you, if you want a rabbit hole to jump down, there are so many cool kits you can get, parts, you can get custom pieces, metal parts. it's amazing. When I was at Silicon a couple of weeks ago, there were a handful of people who basically just make

lightsabers for a living. I got to talk with a lot of them, and they've sort of developed a lot of these systems, these like almost plug-and-play systems to build your own lightsaber. It's really cool. I'd love to chew on the ear, one of those people one time,

and just ask them in their world, if they're just making lightsabers for a living, and that's just kind of their realm, do they get heat from, like, Disney? Do lawyers ever call them? I don't know how that works these days. I don't, yeah, I don't think so. There are enough of them now.

They're enough of big company. So, for example, I ordered mine from Sabreforge. They've been around for a long time, and they're still around, and they have booths at conventions and stuff. I think Lucasfilm has been pretty lenient on the Star Wars costuming stuff. Yeah. They have kind of an unspoken agreement with the community. Yeah. Which could, of course, change tomorrow.

That's the problem with unspoken deals that could change in a heartbeat. But, yeah, I was just curious about that. Well, that's good to hear, though. I think that kind of creativity would get super stifled if they got real litigious about it. I'm glad it's not. And there are some incredibly creative lightsaber things that people are making now that are really cool. That only barely take any inspiration from Star Wars, they've got off to become kind of their own thing now. It's really amazing.

Yeah, that's cool. So I was able to buy the electronics. I didn't have to figure anything out. I just bought the parts I needed, a fully made kit. All I had to do is pick the blade color and the blade length, and they sent me everything. Now, I did end up swapping out some of the components because the handle I was working with

a lot smaller than I thought it would be. Oh, sure, a lot smaller than a typical big, big, beefy lightsaber. Yeah, and it wasn't a cylinder either. These kits are usually designed to put the electronics in a cylinder. My handle is this flattened sort of thing. Yeah, it's like an extreme oval the way that thing would be inside. Right. And it tapers to get thinner as well at the end.

So I found a smaller speaker. I found a much smaller battery. That was the main problem. The battery that's in there's very small. It doesn't last very long, but it fit and it does the job. And then there's also an activation button to fire the whole thing up. And I had to swap out a much smaller button. But what's cool is that when you look at the,

the handle, there's only a tiny little button to turn it on and a small quarter inch hole to charge it. But it's very sleek. I was able to keep it without having a bunch of giant buttons sticking off of it. And then the guard. So this is the part I'm the most proud of. The guard is all made out of brass. And I am very quickly falling in love with brass, just working with it. And the finished product is really cool. So there's a sleeve that holds the blade That was turned on the lathe. I think you guys had that up on the screen there a minute ago. Yeah, yeah.

I have this tiny little baby lathe that has worked fine for me so far, and it was perfect for this job. And then the guard portion, the sort of circle with the ornate looking thing on there, that one I cut on a CNC machine. That was really, really neat. Look at this little brass piece thing. That's cool. Mm-hmm.

So what is it about brass that you like? It's already got the metal texture, so you don't have to deal with that, but also it's kind of heavy, so you got some heft to it. Like, what's the love affair with brass currently? Yeah, the weight feels nice, the sound, like when it hits other stuff, it feels, it sounds great. Working with it is, it's just like on a lathe, for example, it just cuts really well on a lathe. Yeah. It's like it's made for machining, and it's like it's a lot softer than, say, steel. Yeah.

So it just cuts really well. Now, to use it, though, it costs a little more. They call that brass tax. That's right. Of course. Of course. All right. Sorry.

Continue. Don't let me stop you. Keep going. It is. I did learn that it is fairly pricey. Or at least right now, brass is. I don't know what it normally is. So I had a bar stock that was put on the lathe to make a couple of parts.

But I also had this flat stock that I chucked in the C&C machine to cut out. It took me a couple of tries. C&C is a complicated beast. Sure. And while brass is a softer metal, I have a very small CNC machine I was borrowing. And in it, it struggled a little bit. So I had to, you can slow the machine way, way down. So it took a long time to cut all the parts.

But on my second try, I got a really good. That's not bad. Yeah, two's better than the 20 or so would take me. Yeah, right, exactly. What's all that brass on the floor? Yeah. That's right. Yeah.

That's cool. So, like, I made, the first, I made one guard, and it kind of turned out okay, and now I just have that. I guess it's going to be a coaster or something. The second one turned out really well. I even had to, there was a chunk of brass there that needed to be a little wider, so I heated it up with a torch and just whacked it with a hammer, which was fun. I'd never really done that before to reshape a piece of metal. And you could do that. Like, if a piece of metal isn't wide enough, you could just heat it and whack it until it's flattened.

And then it's wide enough. Can't do that with a wood. wood or plastic. No, no. No, I'd love to see Mark try. Yeah. Yeah, this is a, you get that, you hear that challenge there? Spagnolo, get it on, buddy. Get it going. That's right. Well, wow, this is a really, really neat project and something I don't know that anyone would ever have thought of. Like, everyone wants to have a, the sword from Highlander and everybody wants to have a lightsaber, but no one ever talks about doing both in one. Yeah, and it was, it was just very, very satisfying to put together. It's all screwed together. Like,

Nothing's glued so I can unscrew all those metal parts that I custom made. The light looks so good. Like the blade looks so good. The blade looks so good. Yeah, it's just a nice, solid looking, sweet-looking blade. That looks really, really good, man. Congratulations. Now, you said you're going to eventually, at some point, you're going to make a proper, like,

super detailed sword from that film that is just a bladed sword, and that's the whole point. And that would be more like just a straight-up replica. cut. Although I would want it to be good enough to be able to cut things like what do people cut for demonstration. They rolled up mass against a tomato and then look how clearly it goes with this tin can. Yeah. Yeah. I have some friends who work more with metal. I have a friend who's a sword smith who I may see if he wants to help me make a blade. That'd be pretty cool. That's pretty cool. You have all the right friends in the right places for stuff like that. Right. Oh my gosh. Look at this thing. I'm looking at your final shots here at the end.

You're like, oh, that light even looked like it came out of nowhere. Uh-huh. Damn. That's cool. And look at the nerd holding it. Man. Well done, dude.

Very cool project. You can see this, of course, over on the Punish Props Academy YouTube site or punish props.com. We'll get you there. So do check that out and get your own creative juice flowing. You got a little bonus link for us today? Yeah, so ClickSpring, who's a machine is, he does a lot of stuff in brass. He put out a new video all about ancient technology and ancient workshops, and it's fascinating.

So again, he does a lot of like machining and brass. He makes clocks and stuff. And he's been building this antikythra mechanism for a long time now, and he keeps diving into it. Oh my gosh, I love little stuff like this. Yeah, and that's the other thing. Everything he makes is teeny tiny. You'll think it's normal size Until his thumbnail shows up

I was going to say This thing looks like a giant brass or metal block That you know a dude could stand next to And then this giant human thumb comes down And moves it around like oh okay Then we're talking like He's got a good micro camera Yeah micro lens on this camera is what I'm saying

Yeah wow that's beautiful Go check it out That's ClickSpring on YouTube Bill Having you here as always A giant pleasure and we look forward to seeing you next week. Bye, Bill. See you next week.

Pops.com, everybody. Chimbeard on Twitter. All right. How about some, oh, you know what I was going to share with them? I'll do it with you real quick. Sure. Finally broke out the clay.

Oh, look at you. Yeah, we had a clay date. We called it with the boy. Play date. Nice. Where we had Van over and we're like, you know what, let's do some clay,

and he just, of course, mashed it all together. But I made something that scared the poo out of him. I'm putting in a discord now. Oh, wow. Even with Carter. So Carter made the hat because by itself it was a little freaky. I just made a quick head.

A little demon head. Yeah. And I think it's the lack of eyelids that can really get you. Anyway, she put that little cute little flower hat on it. And that still didn't do any good. But he kept eye in it and he wouldn't like he got really distracted by it. And at one point he looked at me all worried and goes, scary. So we had to hide it.

and then I'm a little worried that maybe had some dreams last night. Anyway, the point is, we broke out some clay. Good, good deal. Yeah, some clay. Yeah, I was going to say the stuff I remember you holding up was just like a big brown brick of clay. So this must have been like some sculp-y or something you had.

This is some plastic scene that I think Kim picked up. So it's the oil-based stuff, which, you know, isn't really going to go anywhere. But I do have that big block of sculpy and those. new tools. I think after just digging around in there for a minute, made me go, oh, yeah, I do actually really enjoy this. Why am I not doing this more? Yeah. Yeah. So I'm going to do that more. It's kind of cathartic too, right? Yeah. I don't know why. If you don't like something, bang, you just mash it up and start all over again. That's right. But it's, it was a lot of fun when he had a good time. That's cool. Except he thought it was scary and I felt a little bad about it.

A little. No, the nightmares, grandpa. Yeah, and what's funny as Taylor came home, we were watching while they went out to dinner for their anniversary and they came home to get him and I said Taylor don't I showed her this thing I said yeah look at he hates this thing but I made his face and she goes no he doesn't she takes it out of my hand runs over to him and holds it right up to him and goes you don't like this you don't like this he's just like I'm like no he's gonna have nightmares oh you've made it worse yeah it's your fault now not mine that's funny uh all right bill or not bill uh Stephen incoming Stephen yeah we're gonna get that going on which uh

starts with this. Stephen Schlecker. Stephen Schlecker. Hey, look who it is. It's our own, we like to say we own him. It's our own Stephen Schleaker from major spoilers.com, joining us from Hayes, Kansas. Hello, hello, Stephen. How are you?

Good morning, Scott. Good morning, Brian. I don't know if you can hear me. We can hear you just fine. Yeah. Where are you at school? It's cool today. Are you?

I'm on my end, but that's okay. Oh, a little choppy, not choppy, but it's not terrible. It's not too bad. Yeah. We'll make it. We'll make this work. It sounds like we're in a secret meeting, though. I know. You're so, like, are you at the DMV or something? What are you doing? No, I'm at the office, but I thought this got set up correctly, but who knows?

Oh, okay. You never know. We'll make it work. I know that. Hey. It's sounding better and better, so Discord's figuring stuff out. Yeah. It does this thing where it likes to be dumb for about 30 seconds, and then everything sounds fine. But, hey, it's a major spoilers time. Let's talk about this. Did you, okay, so you saw why the last man, Stephen, you caught the first episode? I watched the first episode. And I was, I was not super impressed.

And I know a lot of people are very excited about this. I mean, the comic book series was very, you know, seminal back, was it like 15 years ago or whatever it was when it first got out. But I think times have changed a little bit and things have changed a little bit to where I watched the first episode. And I was like, you know, I don't believe the premise just because a bunch of men die or all the men die. I don't think the world would collapse because women are pretty self-sufficient and smart and can handle a lot of those same exact things. Yeah, I feel like that's true, but also there's still stuff to mind there. The question is, is it enough to make a TV show and have it sustain itself?

Like, for example, one of the things I loved about the comic was the shift in military power that happened overnight. So overnight, because we are such a man-based military in terms of leadership, engineering, and other stuff, our military completely collapses overnight because all of the men die. All of the pilots, all of the chiefs of staff, all of the generals, all of the, you know, these are all men. And they all just die. But in Israel, it's already mandatory, women get mandatory military training anyway.

And there's already, the military is just stacked with women. And that also in leadership roles. so what you have is a overnight succession that just lands on them but they're ready for it and now they are the world military power based on experience and positions already held and their planes didn't all go down because a lot of women were flying them and that sort of thing like that I haven't seen the first episodes I don't know if they addressed that but I loved that concept of not so much that they couldn't handle it across the board because they could I agree with you it's that the dynamics and power would shift in a way that's interesting to explore. And so that's one of the things I loved about the comic and I want the show to go that way. And if I'm honest, I am kind of

rubber, I want to be a little rubber necky about the first episode because the concept of everyone, all of the men suddenly just dying and then illustrating that is interesting to me. Like the president collapses, all these army guys collapse, all these planes fall out of the sky and kill a ton of people.

You know, it's awful. But the, but I want, I like to, that's an interesting thing to explore. And it would be just equally as interesting if all the women suddenly died for me. Like, it's not about which gender goes away. It's just what does that do to the dynamic of everything? It sounds like for when I've read and for what you just said, the show maybe leans too far into, it's all chaos because women don't know how to do it or something.

From what I saw in the first episode, it seemed like, oh, this is a fairly faithful adaptation of the comic book, except for the weird mysticism part, you know, where York, Except because he's got that ring around his neck that that's what's saving him or whatever the, whatever his thing was going on in the comic. But yeah, they seem like it's a fairly faithful adaptation of the comic book. But like I said, it's now 10 years later. And I think we as a society look at things differently. And we look at women's roles in society a lot differently today than we would have when the source material came out.

And so I think there's a lot of stuff that may be a little, I don't know, may have. feel like it's aged wrong. Well, that's interesting. Did you watch the first three or just the first episode? I just watched the episode and I was like, yeah, I'm not interested in anything else. Okay. Okay. Yeah, because they did drop three.

I'm going to probably go through the whole thing just because I'm going to, but I. Oh, for sure. I feel like, I feel like you're right. It is a thing of its time. What's funny is it feels like we've gotten, I think that just says we've, there, the whole point of that original comic wasn't just to say, oh, what if. I mean, that's part of it. No, no, no. But most of it was actual commentary on.

power dynamics and the patriarchy and it's too much and women don't have enough role in society like that's what it was commentating on and now what you've kind of said and I think I agree with this there have been there has been progress in those 10 years

like we've actually made a bunch of progress that makes this feel it comes it's just going to feel different it's going to hit differently and that's unfortunate because I when I read that run I was so I was so into that comic you guys Like, holy crap, I couldn't believe how much I loved it.

And Brian Kvon became my favorite comic book writer, and I couldn't wait for anything he ever does. Still true. Just love everything he writes. And, yeah, I'll admit, I was excited about this. But I know part of me is like, I can look at the mirror and go, Scott, what are you actually excited about? And what I'm excited about is disarray and end of times kind of stuff.

I love that. I like it. My fiction don't like it in real life. The grand reset, kind of is what it is. Yeah, exactly. Speaking of Grand Reef, are we getting close to resetting the clock here in about 30 seconds if Scott keeps talking about the apocalypse?

What do you mean if I mention Mad Max Fury Road? There it goes. All right. Restart the clock. But here's the thing, like there's another, the trailer for that Tom Hanks thing dropped today, which is very much post-apocalyptic, you know, whatever.

You could show me, you know how much I love Waterworld? All of this could be bad and I'm still into it. So I'll watch this, you know? I'm going to watch it. yeah i'm gonna give it a shot as well and i'm a i'm a three episode guy like i'll i'll do three episodes before i decide if uh it's for me or not i gave i gave golden girls three episodes i think i actually even gave it four or five but uh i did yeah but uh you know it's it's what

i do to decide if i like something or not just me as they would say thank you for being a friend I hate that song. That doesn't help things because I really... It doesn't actually help my argument. So freaking pedantic. It's like, oh, thank you for me. You'd give me the best present of all of all my friends. Well, maybe I'm just back in the mood or something.

I spent a decent portion of my weekend creating some new apocalyptic art. I've been thinking about this stuff a lot. I watched a chunk of Fury Road again. Like, I'm in the mood right now. so what about i i don't know if we talked about this what about the apocalypse gets you so excited i don't know uh i don't know what it is there's something about especially lone i mean honestly it's you know a lot of this has its roots and roots in westerns where it happens kind of in its own place uh it's the world building of like well what if everything we know

just goes away and i'm doing this safely behind a screen or behind a comic page or behind or or whatever. I'm not having to experience it. I don't want, I don't want this in real life by any stretch. I want good societal norms. It's cool to like imagine what would happen if all of a sudden the playing field just got leveled and everybody had to kind of start over and rebuild a society. I think some of it psychologically is, I've talked to Wendy about this, I think some of it is the big reset.

Oh, Miravina just said in the chat, like a big reset. The concept of a reset doesn't scare me because, If it's just you and it's your dog, you know, whatever stereotype you want about your apocalypse, but, you know, it's you and you've got to make your way across the desert to get to the thing that you know there's food or whatever. There's something just pure and basic about it. I also think it's why I like these like simulation games, like car simulator or car mechanic simulator and the new fantastic gas station simulator where you run an old gas station

on Route 66. I think the reason I like those is because they're just like. Like, here are my tasks. It is all I have to do. I don't have to worry about anybody else. I just got to do this. And let's just go do it and get it done. And there's something about an apocalypse where it's just like,

you know, I'm the mariner. I got to find paper and I got to trade it for some fish. And here's some dirt I found. And let's go to the floating place. And I'll exchange that for something. And now water world's better place because I'm just getting my shit done. Like there's something about it. I don't know what it is.

Like all Mad Mad Max had to worry about was this one thing. Get these women out of here and survive. And there's something pure about that. I don't know what it is. I can't really explain myself very well, but that's the best answer I can give you. You're saying I understand a lot of people just were like, I just wish we could wipe this thing down to the ground and just start over from scratch.

But I think people really underestimate what it means to start something over completely from scratch. Right. Yeah, there is something about that. And I think that's the theory part because, yes, Mad Max may be about, Let's go from A to B and then back to A again. But you've also got to think that, you know, there's people trying to kill you left and right. What are you doing for food and water and all of these other things?

And your daily survival is going to be a lot more about your basic needs than drawing a picture and trying to barter that for something else. Right, right. And yeah, there's just maybe it's that shakeup of the mundane. Or maybe it's just purely like, well, here it is on screen and it's happening. I'm not there, but I like to explore these concepts and do it in this creative way. And I don't know, I just find that cathartic. And we lost, we lost Stephen on that whole lot.

Oh, no. I think he's in a weird place for Internet. There he is. Hello. You're back. Oh, yeah. Hello, Steve. Oh, I got Discord shut down and reboot it.

Oh, everything sounds better. Oh, that's not. Oh, that's weird. You're saying, no, it sounds better? On my end, yeah. Oh, weird. Maybe Discord needed a minute to reset. You never know.

Maybe it did. Yeah, yeah. Well, all right. So why the last man? Jury's out. We'll see how that goes. Well, I think a jury actually liked it quite a bit. You should ask him tomorrow.

Our jury's in, but the rest of the jury's out. Yeah, our jury's super in. All right. Also, so I, somebody said, I didn't know that Marvel old man Peter Quill thing on audio, the podcast thing. I didn't know that existed until like a week ago. Yeah, the Marvel has done a lot. They did a Wolverine series, which was super popular. then I know they did an old man Logan one.

And I'm trying to think what else they've done. But now HBO, and I think as kind of a response to the popularity of the Marvel one, HBO Max has released Batman the Audio Adventures. Oh, yeah. So this is, tell me who's in this again. Somebody big is in this.

It's like everybody. It's got Dennis McNickleson from Saturday Night Live, who wrote and directed it. It's got Jeffrey Wright, you know, the Uatu and also from Robot World. Yeah. He plays Batman. He's the new Commissioner Gordon and the new film get made. Oh, wow.

Yeah. So he plays Batman. Rosario Dawson is Catwoman. John Likizamo shows up in the first episode as The Riddler. And then you've got a whole bunch of others just like celebrities left and right. Alan Tudik, Brooke Shields, Paul Shearer. You've even got Ted Lassow himself. Yeah, Jason Stake.

Not as Ted Lassow, but the actor. Yeah, he's got to believe. Batman, you know what I got? Ray Wise, so many more. It's just, you can listen to it right now. They've released like the first episode for free on YouTube for people to check out. But you can also listen to it on HBO Max. And it's fairly well done.

I assume it's on some podcast, RSS feed somewhere, right? Should be. Why wouldn't they do that? They got to do that, right? Yeah, it's probably on a podcast feed as well. But they just say, come listen to it now on HBO Max. Yeah. I'm all about this.

I think this is great. It's like a return to old, you know, old drama radio. radio yeah it is this is a crazy shadow nose look at this bobby moinehan keenan thompson jason jason sedak as you mentioned allan tudic uh brett spiner's in this got a little star trek connection there seth meyers crazy tim meadows uh and ray wise from uh from your uh wrapped in plastic teaks yeah that's cool i like him bad very good in season three of uh fargo as well he was in that uh very familiar looking bowling alley from another show where he was the devil too right yeah that was called oh it was great while

it lasted uh yeah Kevin Smith was involved somehow directed the pilot or something reaper yes so thank you for your rangers great or reaper was great until it wasn't it kind of fell right exactly yeah started out great yeah it was a bummer anyway uh all right well that's something i'll get into i guarantee that i like me some batman been reading uh there's a brand new black label that just dropped on Infinite from Zach's not Zach Snyder Scott Snyder writing and Greg Capulow drawing

again so they're back together and it's called shoot batman something it's good so far I wish I could tell you what it was I don't have in front of me but it's very good all right let's now talk about Warhammer 40K the ultimate

dystopic future again that's why I like Warhammer 40K by the way 40,000 years in the future big space marines everything shot to shit it's an amazing world and macfarlane toys is finally making some toys and now everyone's losing their mind so tell me more stephen yeah i think a lot of people get a kick out of these these are like $20 for you know their regular action figure costs kind of what they cost these days but in november you can start grabbing some of the monsters uh from that series uh the gen steeler figures is the one that's coming out and

macfarlane showed that off and of course i think if you're somebody that likes ultimate poseability with your figures. Yeah. Then McFarling Toys really does a really great job with that because they usually have all the points of articulation. It's all about the articulation. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, these are, this is cool.

Gene Steelers are, you're, if you're familiar with 40K at all, like in the video game sense, these things are all over the video games. But I would hope that we'll get some space marines and some orcs, space orcs, and all that stuff. Oh, my gosh. this might be the first time I'd actually be like into collecting a McFarland run of toys

I would love this and I don't even play a whole series of these yeah and I don't even play desktop 40K but I love the I love the world in the universe and the stories and stuff and the books Do you ever just get the urge to go and buy any 40K figures and build your own and paint them all that sometimes yeah but then

I think that I need a whole extra day of the week and it doesn't exist so I don't do it but yeah I wish I had time the space orcs are amazing they spelled with a k they're all about carrying having big rickety mecks it's such a great world freaking i love 40k

anyway so there you go those are coming and watch for those uh steven anything else going on in the major spoilers network that you'd like find folks at home to just like glom on to and consume at their most earliest convenience yeah i would tell people to go check out critical hit critical hit for the longest time for it's on what are we out 10 years now 10 plus years now yeah for the longest time we did uh dungeons and dragons we've been playing a bunch of other games on the show and for the last uh three or four weeks we've been releasing panic at the dojo so if you like crazy video game

battles where it's you know just kind of fighting uh your opponents go check out the panic at the dojo games that we have been playing on critical hit you can find a link to those shows over at major spoilers dot com and until next time remember everybody Stay hydrated. Stay hydrated. Very good. There we go. Into the mist goes one Steven Schlecker.

Ryan, I'd like to finish things out today with a mashup from Jamie. It is Monday. We have to do it. That's right. Contractually obligated. This is true. That's what she says, he says in his information, which we enjoy because often it's things we said we didn't know we're gross when we said them.

So enjoy. Sit back and relax. Here it is. you jam it down one hole and up the other hole and you're welcome jamie for that is his birthday today or what do we celebrate i know exactly this this one may have a bunch of stuff for you jamie so just enjoy it why don't you go around from the rear so i go around the rear of the dog and she's looking we'll get used by jamie by none of it it'll be fine yeah i'm sure there'll be zero innuendo coming out of this it'll be fine and

a meat up. That's where you want your meat. You want it up. Oh my gosh. Why is this so hard? Man, that's coming fast, isn't it? It really is, yeah. Oh, yeah. Do you feel the hit? I'm getting the contact high just by being on the other end here. This is great. Keep going. Keep going. Oh, yeah. Hold on. Why is that up?

It was like in her face. Just on blast. And I'm always like, what the for? Oh, geez. And I realize what's happening. And I whip it around and I'm spraying the garage. I don't know where to put it. Got on my wife's car I got so wet My phone stopped working for a while

Whenever we've got a big hole We like to fill it with this It was like 12 inches Or whatever it was back then My dad Right It was absolutely straight when it went in It's crooked now

Oh very forceful end I started off slow And then just pushed it through Yep pushed it through Just jammed it right through At the end there Yeah Better than Dick I guess

True Yeah Anything's better than that It looks a lot bigger Than I thought it would I like sausage And the head starts spinning and then Spider-Man, this is virginity.

Sorry to all the ladies in the audience who just watched me do that. Oh, my Lord, I don't want to think about why. All right, let's move on. There it is. Just threading that needle, just ease it in. Mm-hmm. Oh, my God, that looks amazing. Claire sent me a picture of her box.

Something that if you were to try to flush down the toilet, it might plug. Plug it? Up? Might plug it, but it would be hard to remove. I don't like this conversation. at all. Pull out your thing and shove it back in there, and then blow on it.

Pull it out, blow on it. I don't mind. I don't care. Because it was only half an inch last time. That's nothing. Let's see. Skin, hair, nails.

Trying to find head. Aren't we all? Yeah, I'm trying. And that's the cards, everybody. Enjoy. Oh, my gosh. That went places. Woo!

Jamie. Well done. Well done, sir. A round of applause for Jamie. well done uh the declares box really got me nice job yeah yeah that's your fault um okay we're we're doing with the show uh big thanks everybody for joining us and uh do it again tomorrow because we'll be back doing this again tomorrow in the meantime we're almost at the end of the month that means patreon dot com slash tms need your love head on over there and love it all right that just means

throw it a buck or whatever you want to do make it real easy give it some love that's right and uh help us grow because we got stuff to unlock still we have have other cool benefits. And things are happening right now that you'll get in the mail. I sent something real cool to the art printers. To the art printers. To the art printers, that's on its way. So lots of cool stuff. And can you imagine, I mean, a dollar a month? What did we do? And if you're already at a dollar, maybe consider bumping it up to two dollars. Maybe, maybe. And if you're at two, if you like what you're doing, what we're doing here. Yeah. Yeah, why not? Why not all these things? So get in there, get that done. That's Patreon.

patreon.com slash TMS. If anything else is eluding you and you're trying to track it down, you can find it all at frogpants.com slash TMS. We're done. We're out of here. We need a song. What do you got? Yeah, I got something sent in by somebody named Gaggaggagg, Gitch. That's how he wrote it. Gagoo, Gaggaggolitch. He says, I sent an email a while back showing the approval of playing this song on your podcast. Oh, he did. Yes, I confer or concur. And confirm. Confirm. Confirm. Confirm. Confirm. Confirm. Confirm that.

My wonderful wife's birthday is the 26th, but you can really play that any time this week. She won't hear it, but I want it well-known in the ether, how much I love her. And I'm glad our 20th anniversary will be next month with many more in the following years. Congratulations, Gaggagg-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-A. Anyway. So this is an indie band called The Gophsicles, and this is a cover of Prince's Delirious. Now, I want you to take this with the... Imagine if Weirdall-Yankovic didn't do parodies, but just did covers. I mean, he's done a few covers, but obviously more better known for his parodies.

This has kind of a Weardell-Yankovic feel to it, and I can't figure out if it's the vocals or what it is. But anyway, here are the gothsicles covering princes delirious. You can find it over at their band camp. Again, it's the gothsicles. See you guys tomorrow. Prince, don't sing. Oh, yeah. Stupid look on my face

It comes to making a mastery lover I just can't sit around Because I get delirious Delirious Delirious Delirious I get delirious I get delirious

When you hold my hand But it gets so weak I can hardly stand The temperature's running hot! Maybe you've got to stop! Because if you don't, I'd gotta explode and girl I got a lot! Because I get delirious! Delirious!

Delirious! Delirious! I get delirious! Now you gotta take control because I just can't see You're just too much to take I can't stop, I ain't got no brakes No, you're gonna take you for a little ride up and down You're out of round one, let's take you delirious

Yeah Delirious Yeah Delirious You gotta be going crazy This is amazing Delirious I'm just going insane

Delirious This show you're losing all my sandwiches. This show is part of the Frog Pants Network Frog Pants Network. Get more shows like this at frogpants.com. I can feel my butt getting sore already. Yeah.