The Morning Stream - TMS 2179: Mud Blood Hut

Episode Date: September 23, 2021

I saw it on The TicTak. We built this city on lots of blood. Zero to Jackie Chan Will get You Killed. Peep Power Hour. Gorge, Pivot, Puke, Repeat. Same Screw, Different Place. How Many Red Fraggles are There Anyway? Cocoa Powder, Just Add Blood. Therapy is Easier When They Are Dead. Screwtegrity. Coffee Goes In, Pee Comes Out. Upchuckin' a frankfurter. 60 Pounds of Peeps = DEATH. Who is Going to Milk the Spiders? Ben Folds Clothes. Shitting Bricks with Bobby. Therapy Thursday and more on this episode of The Morning Stream. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Coming up on TMS, I saw it on the Tick-Tac. We built this city on lots of blood. Zero to Jackie Chan. We'll get you killed. Peep, power hour. Gorge, pivot, puke, repeat. Same screw, different place. How many red fragles are there anyway?

Coco powder, just add blood. Therapy is easier when they're all. Buh! Therapy is easier when they are dead. Screwtegrity. Coffee goes in, pee comes out. Up check in a Frankfurter. Sixty pounds of peep.

equals death. Who's going to milk the spiders? Ben Folds Clothes. Shitting Brits with Bobby. Therapy Thursday and more on this episode of the morning stream. One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland. But instead, I drove him to an old burned out warehouse.

Oh, no, I said. Disneyland burned down. He cried and cried. But I think that deep down, he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late. Well, now that you're here, what do you want? morning. And welcome to TMS. It is the morning stream for Thursday, September 23rd, 2021. I'm Scott Johnson. He's Brian Ibbott. Good morning. Good morning. My microphone is crooked.

Let's see if we can't tweak that piece of garbage. This thing's just starting to lose some of its screw integrity, you know? Scruttegrity is the correct. Exactly. There you go. Not enough No, it's, yeah. I mean, mine does the side to side wiggle a little too much. Oh, yeah. See, same screw. Same screw. Yeah.

Different place, same screw. Yep. Well, now they need to fix that. All right. Hey, welcome to the show, everybody. We're glad to be here. Got a nice live audience, a couple of newbies in there today. I always happy to have new people come join us live.

You're always welcome to, by the way. Welcome. Yeah. We never say this, but every day, 9 a.m., that's mountain time, here at frogpants. tv or twitch dot tv slash it's the only times on it matters yeah it's the only times on it matters you can come in here and you can watch us live uh you don't have to bother with all that podcastery stuff that's still

how like 90% you get the show but you know there's room for you here if you want to come and hang out that's right and there's so much that you get from the live show that you may not get from the recorded show there's a little bit more that you get from the recorded show specifically music yeah but with the live show you get the pre and the post uh which you can get from patreon i'm not selling it very well am i No, but it's okay. Look, we haven't really workshopped this sales pitch. It's fine. We're going to work on it. We'll come back. And don't you guys work? It's the visuals, right? It's seeing us live. It's seeing us talk with our mouths moving. It's being shocked at how we look like in real life and being horrified by what you see. That's what they really got a face for podcasting, don't they? People are always really surprised. The show that gets people the most surprised, though, is I think core. No one ever thinks John or Bo look like. talk no one ever this everyone's always surprised by their faces yeah which you know i still am surprised by their faces so i understand i do i completely understand yeah that was something really

from the early days of podcasting for for me anyway was listening to folks like um uh lennonora yeah um uh the illinois's folks um yeah i mean all those early all those early podcasters visualizing what they look like as I was listening to their shows because no one had a live streamed element at the time of course. And then, and then finally seeing him going, huh, that's not what I thought they looked like, but all right, cool. I remember seeing Fletcher for the first time going, ooh, you're not what I thought I would see at all. I don't know what I picture with Scott Fletcher until I met him. But it wasn't that. It wasn't, you know, this slender blonde guy, you know, I didn't. Right. I mean, he's a handsome gentleman, but I really was expecting

somebody a little, like a giant, I was expecting, like... Tom Merritt's a great example, taxicap says. Yeah, he is not the face you expect. And what you see it, it's like you're used to it and it's whatever, but I don't know, people tell me that all the time. It's just the way of it. It's audio. That's what we do.

We paint an auditory picture that you have to fill in the blanks for, and then sometimes your blanks don't match. It's not our fault. It's your fault. Sometimes it's completely different blanks. That's right. That's right. Well, today we will not be shooting blanks.

Today, we will bring you a very potent show. I don't know why I'm using that down that road. We're going to dive in first by telling you about a cool thing that we are informed of by our pal, Amy. She's known as Red Fraggle in the chat. She's in there now, Red Fraggle 3. Was it because all the other red fragles were taken and you had to do a three, Amy? Is that what happened? Are there two others ahead of you that are totally?

jerks and took your name. Anyway, uh, Red Fraggle wrote in and said, Hey, Scott and Brian, my husband and I got inspired by watching the Tour de France this year, uh, to really get back into cycling. We thought, why not do something similar to Brian and do some good while we're at it? Our neighborhood, uh, cycling group is writing for the cystic fibrosis foundation on November 7th. Hubby beat me to the punch, posting this fundraiser stuff to our social media. So he is currently outstripping me in the fundraising. Uh, even my mom, or even my own mother, donated to him before I could get it out there. Oh, no.

Oh, no. What are you going to do now? Thanksgiving's going to be awkward this year. I definitely can't beat him in distance as he's a much more seasoned rider than I am, but I'm betting the tadpole can help me out and out fundraise him. Here's the fundraising page. Yeah, let's make this happen. Tiny.

You are, sorry, tiny URL.com slash red fraggle bike. And it's spelled just like you think. R-E-D, F-R-A-G-G-L-E, bike, B-I-K-E. Just like the famed rock. There you go, like the Friday rock. Exactly. All lowercase, all one word. Dirty little moments.

Yeah, no, this is great. It's funny to get inspired by the Tour de France to go back in the cycling because that is such, it's like saying, yeah, I was watching. Come on, let's work on one of your analogies here. It's like watching. Oh, let's see here. What's it like? It's like watching... I don't have a good one.

Nothing's coming. It's like watching somebody that does something really, really well, and then saying, oh, I want to get it in the... I don't mind. It's not working. It's like watching the most difficult aspect of something. Yeah. And then saying you want to get into it.

I know what it's like you're making a movie and you go, man, you know what I admire. Jackie Chan does all his own stunts. There we go. I'm going to do my own stunts and then you die. Then you're dead. So, yeah, this is already, you know, I'm already showing that I did not have enough coffee this morning. If I can't come up with a damn analogy attempt, geez. Well, you got it there.

You can always pee into your cup like you do, and it'll be fun. We've gotten multiple emails on this front. People are like, it literally does sound like Brian's peeing when he does that. And I'm like, well, I know it's coffee, and you know he's not peeing, so it's coffee. It's fine. The pee comes later. Coffee goes in, pee comes out. You can't explain that.

Explain that was science. Yeah. So anyway, no, Jackie Chan did not die. I'm saying you would die. Chat room is running with a rumor here. I'm saying if you tried to be like Jackie Chan, especially just going from nothing to zero to Jackie Chan will get you killed. All right?

He's a professional. He's really good. That's all I'm saying. Even he would break bones and hurt himself real bad on film sets. So maybe you shouldn't. All right, all right, all right. Ready? Here we go.

It's like watching Joey, a chestnut at the Nathan's hot dog eating championship and saying, you know, I could really go for a hot dog right now. There you go. That's what it is. There's a better analogy. I follow that guy on TikTok, by the way. Do you? Yeah. Does he like just eat? Is that what his thing

is? Sometimes. Like what he'll do is he'll go, here's what I eat for work. And you know, it'll be video of him cramming 400 hot dogs down his throat. And then the next scene will be, here's what I actually get every day when I'm just eating normally. And it's like a salad. and a nice little, you know, half glass of wine at the place he likes. And it's just a super chill, you know, regular dude when it comes to normal eating. But then when he's, you know, when he's working, he's jamming 400 pounds of pork in his guts.

I think you'd have to, that's how you'd have to live it, right? You couldn't, you couldn't be like, oh, what's for lunch? Oh, maybe 35 hot dogs today. I'm not, you know. Yeah. I mean, because one assumes, I don't know if this has ever been, I mean, I assume this has always been true of these eating contests. They just hork it all up when they're done, right? they just yak it.

You can't digest all that. It would kill you, I would think. Like just the nitrates alone? Yeah, I would assume so, but you'd think you'd hear about that if that were the case. You'd think it'd be like, all right. And there goes our winner, Joey Chestnut, yep, leaning over the ceremonial dumpster and puking his guts out for the next eight minutes. What a champion.

Greatest of all time. Always got more. I missed the dumpster with that shot. But I saw it somewhere. Where did I see? It was a Russian. eating contest documentary or something and they had like a they had no they had like a big tray troth thing behind them all that they would all oh right away so they're like just have to pivot basically

they don't even have to yeah and i know that there's a rule that they can't they got to keep it down for a bit uh you know to to have it count as their win but i think after that all bets are off they can go do whatever they want otherwise this guy joey chestnut looks like a fit normal guy like that's the thing about him right he doesn't He's not like, you know, 9,000 pounds. I'm guessing if he just, if he ate those hot dogs and left them there every time, he'd be, you know, grossly obese or something. I would think so, yeah, or have some complications.

If you, all right, let's say you're in the Nathan's Hot Dog Championship. Fourth of July, right? That's when they do that? Yeah, I think so. Yeah. And you, you know, you're eating, blah, bah, bar, or you're dipping your hot dogs into water like you do. Right. Yeah.

You got to lube it up, Brian. You got to lube it down is what you got to do. That's right. You got to get it mushy, so it goes down quick. Then you, like, the contest isn't over, but you turn around, you puke really quick, and then you go back. Yeah. Do they, are you just immediately disqualified, or do they subtract a certain amount from your total based on, based on you throwing up? Oh, interesting.

Do they say, oh, that's about five? your back down to 19. Oh, that's interesting because that's like, oh, four of those dogs are out. Yeah, I don't know. As far as I know, okay, I did see one, but I don't know if it was like any kind of like international binding rules or anything,

but I saw a pie eating contest where the dude who won was standing up, hands in the air, like, look what I just did. I've done it, I've done it. And then while he's standing there, involuntarily, a whole bunch of pie comes flying out of his face. You're sure you're just not thinking of stand by me? Oh, those really happen.

I actually saw this. And then he stops it. He grabs it mid-air. No. Yeah, because it was a, you know, it's all fresh pie at this point. Yeah. And he grabs it kind of mid-air and was able to pull it back and get it back down his gullet and still won because he didn't, nothing hit the ground. So he didn't get in trouble.

Oh, my God. Yeah, I wish I had that video handy. It's a trip. I just visualized it. thing in slow motion. Avatar the piebender, exactly. That's exactly. All right.

Well, if you find that video, do me a favor and don't send it to me. All right. I will not send it to you immediately on your text immediately. That's what I'll not do. Yes, I don't want to see that. That's one I don't want to click on and witness for myself. It's a fair desire to have that desire, I think. All right.

Anyway, I just want to say your daughter, who's in the chat room today, hello, Carter, When talking about the hot dogs and throwing up mid-competition, she was the first person to say, you got to re-eat it. And I just want to say, the apple does not fall far from the tree. I mean, she's her own person, but I'll take some blame for that. I think some of the things my kids say definitely feel like, hmm, they grew up around me, I think. Yeah.

But yeah, like I think that is, that might be the rule. You just got to eat it. No. Nope. I'm out. Sorry. You're not going to compete? Yeah, exactly. Give the prize to Joey Chestnut. I'm done. All right. Joey, you walk away with yet another ribbon in your pretty hair. All right. What are we doing now? Oh, I know. I know this. I think science. I'll make you go poo-poo. It's true. Science will if you abuse it or misuse it. Use too much of it. Yeah, don't use too much science or you'll go poop. Too much science, we'll make you go poop.

It's our old pal Bobby Frankenberger joining us for our science segment we do on Thursdays. Bobby, welcome to the show. Hi, how are you guys doing? We're pretty good. What did you just walk into, right? Is that what you're thinking to yourself? You know, it's all poop all the time on the science segment, I think. That's right.

Hey, let me ask you. Have you ever, are you ever done a eating contest? Like a, you know, like a pot eating or any of that? You ever done that? When I was in college, we used to do all these crazy. competitions with each other. One of them was a peeps eating contest. Oh, peeps. Okay.

So it was me and a friend of mine, Grant, and it was in the lobby of the dorm that we lived in. We had tons of peeps. All this was inspired by the fact that it was after Easter, and we went to, like, Toyser Us to buy something. And they had, like, some sort of, like, a giant pile of old peeps. And they were like, you know, 10 for a dollar, 10 packs for a dollar or something like that. You can't

go wrong with food you buy it. Toys R.S. No. Yeah, no kidding. So we like filled up a cart and paid like five bucks in front of a bunch of a mold. And so he said, let's see how many we can. So we had a competition and the rules were kind of similar to what you were just describing.

It was who can eat the most? And the first one to I think the way we ended it was actually someone had to throw up. So the first one to throw up lost. Oh, that was part of the rule? Oh, wow. That was the timer.

That was the, wow. Dude, that's like finding out which person in the horror movie is going to die first or something like that. You know what I mean? But we also, we also dressed up in like, like a self-styled, like professional wrestling costumes. Like I had like really short biker shorts on and I was shirtless and I like, I think I had like body glitter on or something. Wow. Wow. So right now I'm watching, I'm watching some video of the chat seeing it of an actual peeps eating contest they had in Maryland at some point.

And the job I wouldn't want is there's some people behind these people with plates full of peeps. And if they don't refill the peeps, the guy's peeps on time and now they're behind, whose fault is that? Right, exactly. That's the guy behind you. Like, how do you account for that? Oh, my gosh, these people are going to all hurl. See, their competitions are all sugar. too so it's all a speed they're doing it in speed right so the way we did it was different because it was

we didn't care who got x amount of peeps eaten first we could take our time it just you just i think we had like a minimum amount of time between peeps or a maximum amount of time rather and um so that you couldn't just be like well i'll just eat one every hour for the next 12 days oh gotcha so it's more like yeah like it was uh it's like the power hour where you do a shot every every 60 seconds kind of thing. So the first one to throw up loss. I won, by the way. Oh, well done.

Oh, very good. Congratulations. Congratulations. Yeah, congratulations, question mark. So the only other thing I would say about this is, do all of these people just automatically end up type two diabetic when they're done? Like, my gosh, that's so much sugar in your system, even if you jack it. A job hazard, yeah.

Oof. Yeah, it's one of those acceptable hazards of being a peep eater. Were you basically pooping Legos? for the next few days, like bright yellow or bright red or... I mean, it wasn't great. We also had a water drinking competition one time, and it was similar rules. But my wife now, a girlfriend at the time, she was in pharmacy school. She tried to warn us.

She said, do you know it's actually dangerous to drink too much water? And we were like, you're so funny. And we did it anyway. Yeah, yeah. We found out later we could have died. Yeah. Human 60% water is a good amount. Like it's a nice balance.

And you don't want to go more. You don't want to go less. Exactly. Yeah, it can literally kill you. So public service announcement here, don't drink. Don't keep with your friends to see how much, who can drink the most water. Yeah. And also, you know, 60 pounds of peeps are toxic.

Like literally, you're going to die if you, if you don't yak it up. So be the first to throw up is my advice. Anyway, hey, it's Bobby. We're here to talk about some science. He learned his lesson then, and science is now all about nodding peeps in rapid succession. And speaking of bodily fluids. Yeah, speaking of bodily fluids.

So this is interesting. He sends me this link, and I was sold by the headline because it said something about blood bricks. And I'm like, he goes, well, we have a choice. We can do this story about this or this other one. I'm like, we're doing blood bricks. I don't even know what this is yet. So will you tell me what a blood brick is?

and why this is a worthy discussion today? Well, a blood brick is a brick that's made using blood. So I'll see you next week. All right, thanks for that. Cheaper than blood diamonds, I hear. Yeah, yeah. It's significantly cheaper, yeah. So, no, the whole motivation behind this idea,

it was a bunch of scientists, researchers, who have figured out a way to use human blood to help make bricks out of Martian regalith. And Regolith, if you don't know, that's the name for the dust and dirt, like the really loose dirt that you see on, that it is on the surface of like the Rover videos. It's almost like chocolate milk mix powder. It does look like that, like Nesquick. Yeah, yeah. And it looks like the kind of thing that would be really unmanageable in any sort of, you know, if there's any water involved or like it would be a messy nightmare if you lived in in that dirt.

Yeah, yeah. It looks like cocoa powder for sure. But yeah, so they thought, well, it takes a lot of resources to get to Mars. And the more stuff you have to bring when you go to Mars, because everybody's talking about going to Mars, colonizing Mars, sending people to Mars, right? The more stuff you have to bring, the harder and more expensive it is to get there. Because every pound that you add adds more fuel. that you have to take, which in turn, the fuel weighs a certain amount, which then increases the fuel that you need more. So planning space missions is all about, is very largely about minimizing the

amount of stuff you have to carry or shoot up into space. Right. And it's 246 million miles away also, so you want to be careful about what you bring. So if you want to build a place to live or be or colonize on Mars, then being able to build the construction materials when you get there would be perfect. It would be great, right? It would be ideal instead of having to launch bricks into space. Does that mean everybody going is like, don't forget to bring your blood. We need your blood. It's funny, though, that we actually are, we have our own, every Every one of us has our own bag of blood inside of our body and a little blood-producing factory as well. And it's all called your body.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's called the body. Wow, the science coming out today. This is like insane. This is really intense stuff. This is the complicated, very difficult to explain science that you get me on for every week. Oh my gosh. Chat room at Claire, or what was that?

I'm sorry, Cole Cash says, get your A positive to Mars. That's really good. Oh, nicely done. Yeah. Anyway, sorry. Go ahead, Bobby. Continue. So, yeah, so this is, if you could figure out how to do this, how to make the bricks when you get there, that'd be ideal.

But as you so astutely observed, it looks like cocoa powder, the regolith on Mars. And the concern is that if you, the bricks that you would make, how would you do it? How would you make them structurally sound? how would you increase the compressive strength? When you're making bricks, it's not just about whether it crumbles or not easily or whether you can break it easily, but you have to be able to stack them,

and the weight has to be able to be withstood. The brick has to be able to support all the bricks above it. Exactly. That's exactly right. So that's all about compressive strength. How strong can it withstand being squeezed together? And so they decided to see what happens when you put blood in it. Why blood? Because of its coagulant properties. Is that why?

That's exactly right. So the reason that they, this is not the first time scientists have looked into bodily fluids to make bricks actually. But there's some like South African scientists that have used, used pee to make bricks. That's a whole other thing. Yeah. No, pee is definitely a different thing than blood. sure that won't hold anything together yeah yeah yeah I guess it depends but uh but the idea was if if we could somehow the the the proteins that are in the blood specifically the um the human serum albumin the hs a protein from the blood uh has the potential to it helps to coagulate blood

and so it kind of like tangles up and and gets gets pretty strong and and can bind things to together. So the thought was, could we exploit the properties of these proteins in your blood to strengthen the Martian regolith into bricks? Because, as we've already said, every person who's going to go to Mars has blood with them and is going to be continuing to make more blood. So you might as well exploit that natural resource. How quickly, like, so let's say you are, you're removing blood to help build some bricks. How long does it take you to recreate? Like, how often, or how, what's the rate that blood is produced in the body?

That's probably the question. Oh, yeah. Probably the same question for, like, when you donate blood and stuff like that, right? Yeah, right. How's that work? Yeah, the, yeah, well, the research. When I donate blood, I say, I'm going to get this back at some point, right? Right.

Right. it'll grow back um the researchers the researchers actually did that sort of morbid math um you kind of have to yeah creepy math um and they they estimate that if you had a crew of six people on mars they could produce about half a ton or specifically 1100 pounds of bricks in two years oh my gosh yeah wow that isn't i mean that's two years is a long time i guess but that's that's a higher number than i would have thought you were going to say That seems intense. That's a lot of blood. Well, they say that over the course of those two years, that would be enough bricks to double the amount of, like, space to house people every two years.

So after two years, 1100 bricks, I guess, would make it. So now you have enough space to house 12 people. And then you'd send six more people. And then they would, it's like exponential growth. doubling you know see this is really funny because i what this is making my brain do is realize that it's not the science fiction image is that everything's steel and and and and and rebar and amazing structural this and that because we took it up there and we built it with whatever but that none of that's very practical is it this certainly when you're just getting out there for the

first time and you don't really know the state of natural resources on that place uh you know below surface so exactly so this you have to basically mud hut it with your blood. That's how this is going to go. That is 100% right. That's what they realize is we can't know what kind of natural resources are really there and how easy they're going to be to get unless we go there and start surveying and mining and digging and who knows when or if that will be something that's possible. So we have to figure out how we can make it when we get there.

And yeah, I mean, it sounds weird, but the best way to say, study that is using the resources we absolutely know that we will have, which are things like blood and and pee. They are using, so apparently these bricks that you make with, with blood, are, they have a compressive strength similar to concrete. Oh, weird. Which is really amazing. That's intense, because concrete is no, you know, slouch. Oh, I mean, again, that's what we build things out of. Yeah, exactly. Right. It's not even that much weirder if you think about it. Like, it's only because we're used to what we use concrete for and how we figured out how to best formulate it and all that.

Like, if you're starting out and you're fresh, I'll have a mud hut blood, blood hut, blood, mud, mud, mud, blood, blood, blood, blood, mud, blood, blood, blood, it's not just a place that you keep wizards. You're not just a place where you keep your half-breeds or the mudlids. Yeah, it's not just a place where you keep your half-breed wizards. Your or a, I have to start there. So, I mean, a good kind of comparison on this is like when you're building the sand castle

and you think you've got the sand really nicely compressed and you put that first brick down, then you put another brick on top of it and the first brick just collapses. Yeah. So I'm going to try this next time I'm at the beach. Just bring a, you know, a little bag of blood. Sure. Or just do a little finger prick. Maybe I'll just use my own.

Yeah, a little finger prick. Just squeeze a little bit in there. Exactly. And no, don't worry, folks. I'm just making my sandcastle stronger. You can give tips to all the other kids who are trying to build their sandcastles Hey kids, watch this And then if you really want a pro tip on that

Apparently if you do add urea from urine They can increase the strength by 300% more than concrete Wow, but it'll smell like pee for the rest of your life on Mars Pea and blood so I don't know if that cancels itself out Like a copper penny in pee is what that'll smell it I'm surprised a certain Nicholas Cage clip isn't getting... Oh, yeah, yeah, I'm going to put it up. I'm going to play it.

Thanks for the prompt. But I'm going to say I was going to say this. Let's say you're up there. There's five of you. You've been giving your blood dutifully, building your two-year brick home, you know, doing your thing. And then one day, Bill walks in and says, I'm sorry to tell everybody. I had to kill Hank. He was stealing stuff and then also kind of crazy.

and we needed to end his life. So we've killed Hank. Yeah. The good news is... Yeah. Yeah. But the good news is you got all of Hank's blood. Now you can...

Right. You know, we'll shave six months off this project just with Hank. I can finally build my shed. That's really short-sighted, though. Bloodshed. It's really short-sighted because you could... How much more blood could you have gotten from Hank if you just kept him tied up... Right, exactly.

As a blood factory. In the mud-blood hut basement. Oh, you're right. It's a quick, it's a quick, for now, like a, like you're, you're getting it faster now, but the long term, you need to be thinking long term. And if you take that one season of true blood where they kept the guy, they kept, what's his face? They kept Bill Do Treve on, on, uh, what's his name? I can't think of his name. From office space and, uh, yeah, uh, I love him and everything. And I can't think of his freaking name. Yeah, I know. Yeah. I know you're talking. It's like, I can't think of his name. But you would call Brian. shed, a bloodshed. You'd have to call it that. That would be the real. They're not stopping at blood and pee

either. They think that they could make this even stronger or come up with other materials by incorporating other human byproducts like hair and nails because of the keratin that's in hair and nails.

Your hair and your nails are really strong because of the keratin that are in them. Yeah. They could probably use, they could probably use man ejaculate you know when they could do that that was not one on the list but feces was oh feces you're looking for a nice textured wall

so then you could yeah feces so then you could shit a brick yeah you can shit a brick I love uh I love your house uh Joe man it looks like you really put a lot of yourself into this thing yeah yeah you really do

all right here's that clip sorry Pissed blood all right thank you I felt like I was working really hard to get you to play that. Well, it took me long enough. All right. Well, for more riveting discussions in science like this one, but more, probably a lot

more serious, you can listen to Bobby's podcast, All Around Science, and you should tell us what you're doing this week so people can check it out. Oh, yes. Yes, all around science. We are recording an episode. If you couldn't get enough of these types of

images, then you can come on over to All Around Science. We do a weekly science podcast. The one we're recording tonight that'll come out on Monday is actually our feature is going to be about eel sex. Oh, great. Awesome.

How do they, give me the, I bet it looks a lot like that, the doctor symbol with the yeah, the cadasis or whatever it's called. The cross with a, is it a cross? It's a cross or a sword or

what is that? Serringe? What are they wrapping around? In the middle of it? Uh, yeah, what is it? Is it a snake health symbol? Like sometimes I think it's like a scale or a staff, just a staff. Okay, it's got wings at the top, though. This staff does. It's probably, it's some, it's an old image from like some Greek dude.

It's Caduceus. I was like, I had all the right letters. I just couldn't remember how to put them in the right order to say properly. Oh, yeah, here's a, okay, there's a, there's a great Wikipedia page on the origin of this thing. Before I leave you, I do want to leave you with one more image, which is that if it didn't creep you out enough that they're using blood from people to build things, they've also said that spider silk would be a good binder.

So I'm just imagining basements full of tied up people and giant spiders and all on the surface of Mars. How do you keep those spiders and little harnesses so that their abdomens are in the back And you can just keep weaving and pulling... Oh, the poor spiders. Carter, don't calm down up there. I know you're going to be upset about this one.

Yeah, the poor spiders. All right. Well, Bobby, I look forward to that episode and also to your return. Although I think next week's our trivial things day, but don't worry. I'm going to be driving to Ohio anyway. Oh, I wish me luck this weekend. I'm doing a 10K. Oh, right.

That's right. You've got to pull your hair back, though. You've got to get that up in a bun or something, kind of man bun. Yeah, I do that. Yeah. Make sure that happens. what do you think about an undercut? You heard of this? My son has your hair, basically. It's exactly the same hair.

So right now, what he did, it's been driving him crazy, and he's been, like, tempted to cut it. But then the solution was, somebody told him he could do this. You pull all the bunch of it up, but underneath it, underneath that giant slab, it's all shaved now. So really, it's just connected the time. It's like a really long mohawk that's flopping over the sides. So when it's down, it looks just like it always did. but he can now put it up when he works at the coffee shop he works at

he can pull it up and tie it and brush it over to one side for a cool cyberpunk look yeah yeah that's pretty cool you should try that Bobby come on man I actually think I might try that when I do decide to get it cut you sounded really like

like old man Johnson just now you're like you ever heard of this you heard of this undershaves some sort of deal he could do this I bet he found out about that on Tic Tac yeah Ticktac the tic-tac you got to put the in front of it it was perfect except for the the you need the tick-tac

the tick-tac uh well done uh we'll see you soon be safe and run like mad at your 10k all right by now that's cool that he's doing that that is super cool oh i found a man wiener look at this um i found i was looking for the the medical symbol what's that called the the the cacus, or whatever, the medical thing. Cadasis, and there's one

of this guy holding it and is just, his noodles out. Really? Yeah, like I put it in Discord. Check him out. Oh,

oh, okay, yes. Yeah, right there. Yeah, it's an old statue. Yeah, exactly. Something for. It really is a staff. Yeah.

There's this deal. Is it Hermes? Oh, it might be Hermes. Oh, yeah, because he's got the hat. Yeah, he's got that dumb hat. Yeah, once you get that,

you can get rid of it. I know. Hermes Simplex 2. is the worst. All right. We have time for a news story or two. So we're going to dive into that and do it now by pushing a button that will indicate news. The news is brought to you by.

Yeah, those great statues, never really that impressive down there. Really aren't. Hey, it's brought to you by Coverville. Today at 1 p.m. Mountain Time. Yes, Twitch.tv slash Coverville. Benfolds 55. Yeah, we've moved up from the Benfolds 5 to Benfold. 55 because he just turned 55 um boy a lot of people cover them but guess what it's a lot of

acapella bands so if you like the acapella and you like the benfolds then you're going to like today's coverville actually a lot of covers by benfolds and a set of music of like rock and jazz covers of benfolds that really surprised me with how deep some of these go uh benfolds celebrating 55 we're going to celebrate with them today coverville 1 p.m mountain time twitch dot TV slash covervoole. Now clear this up for me. Is it Ben, he, is it him folding five or are there five people in his band? He folded the five people in his band into three.

So it really is the Ben folds five, like it's his five. Okay. It's a verb. Yes. Okay. Got it now. Yes. Ben folds five people down into three people.

I'm looking at him, a recent photo of him, and that guy holds 55 pretty well. He really does. I mean, I think clean, live in when you're the bard of the suburbs. So, his songs, he doesn't, he'll forever sound like he's, I don't know, 18. That's what it'll just say. He will. And he's, I mean, obviously, he does a lot of

work with acapella bands, which is why acopal bands love covering the stuff. I could easily do the entire show using just acopal bands, but I want to, of course, mix things up. But I don't know why, and maybe he's done this, but I don't know why we haven't seen a full-fledged musical written by Benfold because so many of his songs are character studies and stories and feels like you know the next dear Evan Hansen should be coming from Benfolds yeah no I agree uh by the way I'm looking at some information about him on this

page called information cradle.com uh-huh and I love how he his name just is great in here because it usually will say let's say it was uh Hank his area was who we're looking at It would say Hank Azaria's age, Hank is area's height, Hankis area's families are the headers, right? Yeah. It just sounds great when it says Benfold's age, Benfold's height, Benfold's family, Benholds spouse, like it's great. I love it.

Right. What about his favorite newspaper? Do they say Benfold's paper? Well, Benfolded at home, that only... Ben folding at home. Yeah, Ben folding at home. Oh, love it. Too stupid.

All right, let's move on to this. story here, a 10-foot wide house in Boston. That's literally the entire width of his home. Oh, I love this story. It's pretty great. It's sold for $1.25 million. And you might say why?

Well, first of all, it's right in the smack middle of Boston. But secondly, look at that thing. That looks like somebody was like, we're not moving. We're staying here in our weird thing, our weird attached thing. It's funny because

in addition to being the skinny house, like what, you know, nicknamed the skinny house. It's also the spite house. It was built by one brother out of spite to block the view that his other brother had behind it. Oh, you're kidding. That's great. So he built it in front of it just to be a dick.

I love that. It's funny because when you see the interior pictures, it doesn't look that, it doesn't look that skinny. It doesn't look as skinny from the inside as it does from the outside. And, you know, give me all your Doctor Who jokes. But it looks wider. The photos that they're showing make it look wider than 10 feet wide.

The only bummer about it is this one shot here in particular. Brick wall is right outside that window. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. The view is the brick wall. Yeah. That's kind of an ugly view, but I don't know. It seems kind of, I would live in this if I was a bachelor.

Totally. Yeah, who cares, man? Right in the middle of downtown Boston, all that historic area down there. The other reason it's selling for so much is that it's a tourist destination. And I don't know if the people who bought it are going to live inside of it or if they're going to continue to use it as a tourist destination and let people pay to walk through it and check it out. Chat room just informed me that the Conjuring House is now up for sale as well.

Let's see if we can look at this one here. Oh yeah, that is the Conjuring House. That's a movie Brian's never seen or any of the Conjuring House. Never seen any of the Conjuring films. You'd like them, although they suffer from haunted house rules are all over the place. Yes, which are no rules whatsoever. Yeah, I hate that, but it's a good one of those anyway. You know, I put it up there with like haunting of Hillhouse-ish.

Oh, really? Okay, because I put that at the, that I think is my, that's the top of the list for me for haunted house in media. Because you can't really call it a movie. It's a series. right he's got a um uh sorry the guy who made haunting of hillhouse has something new coming that's uh not yeah what's that call do you know what that is uh um right because there's the there was the second one that had um that was just focused on the actress who was in the first one is a different character right um let's see but they're saying a new thing by him for

Halloween or yeah and it's oh midnight mass that's it midnight mass that's might be out now Mike Flanagan. Yeah, Mike Flanagan. And this is supposed to be another great slow burn relationship-y but scary as shit kind of you know, like what Hillhouse was.

I'm very excited. Bligh Manor was the second one, that's right. And there's a third season coming to that too, but this is a... Oh, okay, so that's what I was thinking it was. I was thinking it was the, it was another one in the same anthology series, but no, okay. No, this is separate.

Unless they share like a, maybe they do share something, I don't know, but... It doesn't sound like it from what I've read, and it looks great. Oh, yeah, I'm super into this. Cool. Yeah, my Clanagan does some great horror. Yeah, he's good. It's subtle and, oh, there it is right there.

The upcoming horror series Midnight Mass and the Midnight Club. Okay. Yeah, and he's the dude what did that really great Gerald's game adaptation for Netflix as well. Yeah, I never saw that. Oh, you should see that. Yeah, I do want to see that. You should see how... Did it not get good reviews initially or something?

There was some reason we stayed away from it. No, as far as I know, it reviewed well. Okay. Let's see, Gerald's game. I feel like it didn't get a lot of fanfare. Let's see, 2017 it was, I think. Yeah. 6.5 out of 10.

That's not bad. I really liked it. I thought it was awesome. I had Henry Thomas back in there and Bruce Greenwood in his skivies. Yeah, for the entirely, he's just dead the entire film. Well, when he's alive, he's ripped. I can't believe how that guy is so ripped. He looked great.

Great. I did, after I downloaded the two Matrix films to my iPad, so I can watch them on the plane without having to pay for Wi-Fi or anything like that. I also downloaded malignant because there's only 18 days left on it before it leaves HBO. And I know Randy says, oh, you could probably find something a lot better to watch than malignant. I still think I'm going to give it a shot. Just because I keep hearing that it's good, but the twist is great. Yeah. Like there's a great twist at the end of malignant.

I have heard similar. I would like to see it. I think I'm gun on before it goes away. Yeah. Here's what he said. Well, you got just under three weeks. This is exact quote from Randy. I've moved catwoman.

Yeah. That's exactly what he did. He moved it over malignant is what he did. It was a really strange thing to say about malignant, but whatever. Actually, a lot of people, Green Bay Spidey really liked it. BioCow said it's only okay, but the twist is good. Goldfinger 30. It says malignant is dumb.

I like, look, I like Sam Jane, for some reason, says Randy is so awesome, whatever. I really, bias, yeah. You got a Randy bias. What, I really liked, I like James Juan. I just think he's a cool director, so

I'll give him a shot. Okay, what's the other one I kind of that's gotten poor reviews, but I still feel like I should see. Oh, cry macho. I just feel like I need to see it. Oh, cry macho, yeah, even though it's getting bad reviews. kind of panned.

Not horrible, but not great. Like, kind of right down the middle. And, man, he looks 90. I'm a horse stepped on my foot, so I'm going to cry, macho. I hear that's where they fit the title of the film into the movie. Is that the entire premise is? It is, right, exactly. It's, uh, great.

Cleese would search for an ice pack. Great. That's what we want. Here's something about macho. This is especially good for macho cats. macho cats. Remember macho cat lady? I remember her. I do. Yes. I forgot how those two words never went together

ever before or after or since. Or in retrospect or at all ever. All right. We're going to take a break. When we come back, my sister Wendy will join us. And we're going to tackle an email from a listener. This will probably tick a lot of boxes for people. So we'll find out when we get there. Oh, great. Okay. Come back after this song presented by the organization known as Coverville Media and Brian Ibit. That's right. Well, we're going up to Montreal, up to Canada for this one.

For somebody who's described by the label as a triple threat, and I'm looking to see what the other threats are, because I know singer, oh, maybe singer-songwriter-producer. There we go. That's his triple threat. He's a singer-songwriter and producer. A guy named Reno McCarthy, and he is, he's got a forthcoming album,

and this is the first single from it. Here we go. Run Up River is the new album coming out at the end of October. You've got the entirety of October to wait for this thing. October 29th is when the album comes out. This will tie you over, though. It's a song called Sundown. Here's Reno McCarthy.

I hate it, but I don't care of it, but I don't care, I find a way to be there. Try it running away, but how long you'd escape was the thought in my mind. Thought you'd want to know now A song is all I know how It's a shot in the dark with a pen as a gun And it's thither and on All that I want All that I want

Lights up in you Everybody goes and I begin with someone new Dry in the rain Hopeful in vain Everything I hope now begins to break again Up is still a let down Oh, I'm due to come round The thought of a minds and our hearts and our souls and our bodies aligned

But on another sundown I thought is all I got now And I heard of a man who's waking again like a break of his mind Oh that you can Lots up in me Taken with a vision, I surrender all I see. Heart of a child, violent and wild, flashes of the future that I've made up into mine. All that I want

But's up with you Everybody goes And I'll pretend you need me to Fight it away Forget too late I just want to sleep tonight without you and mine Is the coffee all right? Harold, don't just shake your head.

You've got to tell me what's wrong with the coffee. Bad taste. Ricotta, not ricotta. The morning stream, is it just me, or does the jungle make you really, really horny? It's just him. The jungle does not make me really, really horny. That song, once again, Brian, was... You bet.

That is Rita McCarthy, and a song called Sundown. from his upcoming album, Run Up River. Nice. Look at some great indie in the middles, man. Yeah. I've been getting emails from people saying, oh, this is great. I looked up the band and got a bunch more of their stuff.

And I love hearing stuff like that. Love it when you guys like the Indian Middle stuff. It's real good. I was these days, because I have to put it in post, I have to just remind myself, oh yeah, go back and listen to make sure. And this year has been like banner stuff. Like new bands that I've bookmarked,

favoriteed, done some playlist for, or like a good year for Indies, for sure. Excellent. Oh, hello. It's a good year for Wendy's and Indies. Always a good year for Wendy. Oh, that's good stuff. Everyone knows Wendy.

My sister, long time sister. Really, since the beginning? You've been my sister since the day you were born. I was born. It's the beginning of one of you. Yeah. I guess so. She's here.

She's also a therapist, a licensed one, one that helps people all the time with their actual real world problem. problems. And for some reason, she's seen it in her wisdom to come here the last 10 years straight and do it on Thursdays as well for you guys. So pretty rad. Also, 10 years. Can you believe it? I have a clip that will commemorate this 10 years. Hold on. I got this yesterday because I was watching something. And they made this comment and made me think of decades. And now I'm going to play this. So here. You know what they call that? Call it a decade. A long time.

It's been a lot of change since then. Yeah, yeah, see? Old Robert Duvall, Robert Duval doing a little serious acting there, you know, giving us a little what for it, yeah. I was nervous. It was me saying something really stupid. No, I mean, I have all those, but it's, that wasn't it.

10 years ago, like that's the latest. It's, you know, you said something silly on the show. No, I think 10, 10, not even 10 minutes ago, I think, I wondered that. Here's a good, windy one, though. So if you want to get a little urine cherry. Yeah, urine cherry. All right. I don't remember the context of that at all.

It's the kids vaping in the high school bathroom. Oh, urine cherry in the bathroom, right? Because everything smells like cherry vape and urine. I got it. There you have it. All right. Well, anyway, Wendy is here. And we're going to do this email.

So this email is a little lengthy, but it's okay. We don't mind length. We just like to help. You know, that's what we try to do. So here's the email. I'll read it to you find folks at home and then we'll let Wendy pipe in. It starts like this. I'm a little stuck on where to go for information.

and I wanted to send this into Wendy for some time now. Thank you for any direction you may have as I try to mentally prepare for what may come in my future. So here's the big beef of it. My mom is a Jehovah's Witness who put J.W.J.W. in the middle there. And no one else in our family is. Over the years, I have attended a lot of events with just my pop because my mom's religion was a conflict. She does not celebrate anything normal outside of a wedding anniversary. My dad and I get asked all the J.W. questions because,

people don't want to get stuck in a conversation with a witness. I rarely to never tell people that my mom is a Jehovah's Witness because I don't have the energy for the questions they want to ask. It's never a short conversation. Big issues, I am cautious about what to bring up with the rest of my immediate family and feel like I don't discuss or can't discuss my concerns without a huge family fight centered around my mom. I respect that she has different beliefs, but it has not made things easy.

want to get the family in an outrage again. They used to get very mad. Having said this, I don't remember a lot of fighting when I was a child, but I also can't recall a lot of those years. I think there was an effort made not to fight in front of me, but I did notice something was off. Kids are smart that way. Anyway, there is a major part of me that is concerned about my parents' age.

My mom will become more and more devoted to the religion as she ages. I've seen it already with how she has responded to the pandemic. She put end times here Or he put end times here If my dad would happen to pass before her I would not be surprised if she dissolved Everything through her church I'm not sure what that means dissolved

But anyway Like given all of her possessions and money Oh I see I see So whatever your will or your whatever You would everything would happen over there That's the way I translate that I might be wrong Yeah I'm not sure about it dissolved anyway The organization and her brothers and sisters

all very much unite to help members when needed. I'm not too sure how invasive or aggressive this gets, but I'm aware that there is an enormous amount of energy behind it. One could argue that, quote, good community support, unquote, is why people get involved with religion in the first place, but it has its downsides, too. It is very hard for me to find an information about what I could be up against in the future or how to understand or manage my own reality with everything. Documentaries or internet content tends to be sensationalized or centered around child

abuse allegations, all the typical stuff associated with any religion. I'm just not too sure what to make of my individual situation or know where to go to find not crazy information if it even exists. All my mom's JW friends have been good people. They just believe what they believe and do things differently. At this point, no, I don't fully know what kind of relationship I want to have with her. I have some professional, or have had some professional therapy, but it deadened with me, I'm sorry, but it deadened with me not wanting to combine counseling with her. I'm not sure what that means. To do combined.

So in other words, they didn't want to do any co-counseling having her in the room as well. They wanted to do professional therapy, but solo, not with mom. Got it. So that kind of ruined it for him, is what are you saying? My mom is very honest and goodhearted person. She's not dramatic and very loyal. I love her and I can't have fun with her. But if I'm being completely honest, she can really trigger me.

there are a few people that can aggravate me like she can, probably typical parent-child-type irritations, but both of my parents have been supportive of me and I have never felt unloved. I trust them very much, and they are aware that the religion has created some unusual circumstances. Here's a little bit of additional background from this person, because that's the end of the main email. It says, we're a military family and my mom was raised overseas in a Persian country and schooled by Catholic nuns. Very close to my dad and have been concerned for him during the quarantine. he gets out of the house as much as he can. But spreading the word of Jehovah is all my mom's focused on right now.

And I just leave when I hear her talking to others about it. He does not talk about it or complain. And I have asked if he is under any pressure and he says no. This was a pre-pandemic conversation though. I try not to get mad. This is not an issue. But when there is a frustration, I do my best to remember that my mom is really a a very good person and we believe just when we just believe different things.

There's a whole thing about timeline here about her starting her studies when she was stationed in Germany, a few other things like that. It's none of this I think is too crucial to anything, but there was a separation at one point with the parents and I guess now look back together. So anyway, Wendy, based on all of that information and knowing, you know, sometimes the pivot point of conflict and a lot of family dynamics can often be religion. and either kids rebelling from it or whatever. Where do you want to go with this?

Okay. Well, the very last thing you didn't read, I just want to. Oh, do you want me to read all that extra stuff? I didn't know. No, no, don't. Don't read it. I'll just tell you the last part. It says when my mom moved back in, so they separated about sixth grade and then

high school parents got back together. So when my mom moved back into the house, she was less intense about a religion and stopped leaving propaganda in my room and bathroom. that was not involved and made it clear and so she laid off okay i wanted to note that part uh the very last sentence of the entire thing um because i think what's interesting about it is there is and this is this is all relationships this can apply to lots of different things but in this particular context there is a relationship here that is at the core of all of this right I mean, the emailer has said she's a very good person, you know, her friends are nice, you know, they seem normal enough.

I trust her, I love her. Like, there is a relationship. And when you set a boundary in high school and said, do not, you know, stop it with the propaganda, she stopped. And so there's there's enough to work with. And I know as we age and our parents get older and you get older and, you know, life is one big change or, you know, one and right after another. things start to shift and whatnot. And so I want to focus on the relationship part of this. So this person clearly cares about their parents,

is close to dad, wants to be close to mom. And I'm saying that because there's not a kid on earth who doesn't want to be close to a parent and have a good, healthy relationship. They just don't. The only reason a kid wouldn't is because it doesn't feel possible or it's too risky. And we can, you know, abuse makes sense to all of us.

Like, well, of course. But usually this happens in every family and lots of good people. This can happen where this safety sort of kind of gets lost in a relationship between a parent and a child. And it's often because the parent has very specific ideas of how things should be and the child is trying to figure out what they believe and what they want and need some space to grow, right? So it's very, very normal.

then we add this element of religion and religion has been maybe the the focal point for these differences or these frustrations and so it seems like it is in itself has created the problem right and maybe maybe we've we snap our fingers in religion doesn't exist these they would all be close and it would all be fine but i i suspect we'd find something else Right. And so what's hard is the smokescreen is the, is religious. Whether it is or not, I don't know if it's an actual smokescreen, but it can play as one. Someone else might, it might be how we vacation together or not. Or another one, it might be political beliefs. There's so many things we could just replace this topic with that where one is really into something and we could even say video games. I like to sometimes show video games. Sure. Yeah. But aren't they all kind of intertwine sometimes? Like the concept of religion and conflict there is often, you know, having that role into somebody's politics and then if society is in a particularly excitable mood, then all those things get wound up together. And now religion, politics and all of it are kind of in the same pot anyway, you know, or they can be. Right. Right. And it feels so, it feels different than I'm going to keep going with my video game analogy. Let's say you have a kid that. that hates video games. Okay. Right.

How strange would that be, first of all, because no kids hate video games. Right, yeah. We're already deep into the fiction now. Deep into fiction. Okay, so a kid hates video games. Their dad actually podcasts about video games and learn them. Yeah. And somehow we got to find common ground when dad's spending a lot of time playing

video games and the kid just wants to go out and throw a baseball around. So what happens? And I think there is a, you know, hilariously, oh, are you guys there? Yeah, we're here. Yeah, we're still here. You just got a buzz on your phone. TMS is calling on my other phone. Oh, well, that's weird.

Don't answer it. Yeah, ignore you. It's our competing podcast. Wait, you have multiple phones? How's that going? No, sorry, I don't have multiple. I'm on my laptop. Oh, yeah.

And the phone just rang from Discord. It said TMS. Oh, weird. Okay. Don't double call me. Yeah, ignore that. I'm not doing it. I don't know why that.

sorry about that so anyway okay so we so we take this like what what happens here what does the dad start to think and feel and what does the kid who just wants to um get some fresh air and cycle with their father yeah i love this switching around this is fun okay what what happens to each of them i want you guys to let's brainstorm here what happens to each of them as the entrenchment of the thing I like and is valuable to me. You don't like and you'd like to do differently. What happens to both? So sadly, in this scenario, my kids all love video games, so there's no, it's bad.

But there's this thing we have, me and Carter and Kim have a conflict that drives me nuts. I love movie trailers, and they hate them and avoid them with all haste. They hate them. Is it that they hate them or they're just avoiding spoilers? All of it. They don't want, they feel like they tell too much about the movie. my wife likes to go into let's say something like dune with zero idea or expectation or anything about it the way it used to be yeah the way it used to be you just show up and you watch the movie

and i love the the communal experience that can be people sitting down and watching something they're excited about it's not out yet and you're you just get all stoked about it and here's the new trailer for ghostbuster the new ghostbusters movie or something and i love sharing that with somebody more than i like doing it by myself And currently the only other two occupants in this house refused to ever watch trailers of any kind with me. And it actually got me into a pisser the other night. I was really irritated because I wanted somebody. I can't remember who it was to see something.

It was Carter, I guess. And I don't remember where the movie is, but Carter was like dead set on not watching it. And you're the drama dad. She says in the chat room. She's in here right now. But yeah, I was very, I admit, I was the one that was freaking out about it. but that was a weird thing. I could not get over it for like a day.

I had to sleep it off. I was so annoying. Wow, really. This is a great example because it's dumb. Yeah, it's super dumb, incredibly dumb. Yeah. You're not devoting every minute of your day knocking on doors and telling people about Jehovah and like, you know, only spending time with believers and then telling your kid like you will, you know, I mean, you intensified this by one million. and you had to take a day to sleep it off like so that you're you're giving us a perfect illustration

of what happens um with a pretty low stake situation um and then how it can grow and grow over time so so we're going to take the parent side first so thank you scott for this analogy so we're going to still use yours for a minute what is it that you started to name some of it but i want us to list it what is it you want out of this um that feeling of shared anticipation and excitement for stuff that we're all really into. See, that's the funny thing is the things that the trailers are for are totally up their alleys, stuff they would love to see. Shang-She and the Ten Rings thing, that would have been something that would, you know,

that trailer would have been something for a movie. They all stoked to see. Right. I just, I want that, like, moment of like, we're all doing this. together and a high five and after and we feel that joint feeling of excitement. I don't know why I want that. Well, I mean, it's for the same reason that you like it, that they don't want to see it, right? They're super into and they don't want to have any preconceptions going into it about what it's

going to be or what's going to happen for the same reasons that you want to see it. Right. Is you're excited and you want that, ooh, the taste, the taste of what's coming. Exactly. And I think part of it is I'm not really spoilers of any sort. even just hinty spoilers or overall, like, oh, an idea of what the plot might be spoilers. They don't bother me at all.

I have no problem with it. Because I still know that the journey of the actual watching is going to be what matters. And so I don't take it seriously at all. But on the other hand, I do know what they're, I understand what they're saying and why they would feel the way that they feel. But it just feels like this opportunity lost of like,

it's a small, tiny thing, but it just, I don't know, there's something really fun about the communal thing. and it's not that important. So let's focus on something, the communal thing. There is, that is the thing. You're not, well, you would just go watch trailers by yourself. Yeah, of course. Which you end up having to do.

But that's not actually what you're craving. You're craving the community, the rush that it gives you, the feeling of camaraderie. Like, you want a tribe to enjoy this with you. And I'm using the word tribe because in the end, that's really what this all boils down. to is not being alone in your thing sometimes. Yeah. Right? Yeah.

Okay. So we take a parent who has a kid and that kid is part of this parent's tribe and is this parent is responsible for that kid. Okay. So there is a power differential from day one. So Taylor or Carter, you can say no to your dad about the trailers. You have the power. But it's, it really is a power differential and you take the case of this emailer.

So mother converts to Jehovah Witness and, you know, there's a lot required to be part of that. And that is where a lot of her energy and heart and time and stuff goes, right? So what is she going to think about the kid? Well, I'm going to share this with somebody I love. This is so important to me. And that communal requirement that need to be with, this is why religion ultimately is successful when it is, is that it does provide. community, which is one of the points, right? And so that is a deep down desire of every human being. And then when you have offspring, they're actually part of that tribe. And what happens is,

now, Brian, you started to say from the kid's perspective, which I think is right on, the kid has its own opinion. The kid is not an extension. They do. It has. Darned kids in their opinions. Those kids. That's right. That's right. And if you could just go watch your trailer and they could not watch trailers and it was fine, then we wouldn't have this example. And it's because it does something for you. It means something to you. It's part of your culture and heritage is to watch a trailer, right? And so, so you take this sort of example is that mom comes back into the scene after a separation

and is able to respect that boundary of like quit trying to convert me all the time. let's keep these lines drawn. Now, it sounds like it never quite goes away. It's not like, mom's like, yeah, all right, well, I'll just keep this separate over here and you guys do your thing because there's fighting or there's disagreements or there's anger and all these other folks are just like not not loving it because they are, again, she's in the parent position and this child is in the child position. Now, as you become an adult suddenly you have more power, right?

you're still having this same conflict, right? I mean, Carter's an adult. Yeah. You can't make her watch trailers. No, that's true. It just doesn't work, right? So then what's the resolution? So, okay, I mean, have we covered the kid's perspective?

I'm trying to think, okay, so what does the kid need? We didn't talk about that. Sorry. So the adult needs the connection and the shared experience. Shared experience. And I'm, I am used to the power and I don't have power in this particular. way and this is the most important thing to me and I can't get my own child to listen to what I have to say is is very difficult and we can insert a million different things in here right

this this works for a lot of parent child dynamics okay so what's the kid you guys channel the kids now or maybe Carter wants to chime in what's the kid perspective and need and what's happening there yeah she may want to chime in I mean she's in the chat so she'll have to type us out. But I mean, I could guess what her thinking is. I mean, part of it, part of it is just me going, I can't believe I can't convince them that this is fun. Because it is. It's freaking fun. It's fun like it is in the movie theaters. But then again, I remember back when we were going to theaters on the regular, Kim, you know, pre-pandemic, Kim, Kim would put her head down and close her eyes because she didn't want to see the new Avengers trailer. Like she was even in the midst of a

theater where the sound has turned up to 11 and you can't avoid that there's this giant thing happening in the dark on the only screen of it available she would she'd still avoid it so so i know that uh i don't know i know this is genetic is what we're saying okay her answer is it's just not that it's just it's not that it's not fun it's just more fun for us to see to not see trailers she says so it's as insane as that sounds just have fun yeah but i hear that and i go whatever it can be both both of those things are fun they're both it's all fun everything's fun you can all be fun you know just yeah but do it my way my fun way yeah yeah yeah and now you add to this the the weighty um the weighty subject of salvation and now you're you're gonna burn in hell

if you don't do it my way yeah and then we have we have anteed this up to a billion right and so what is being okay so let's take the the emailers perspective it's a kid who grows up having there there is a chasm between them and their mother that is difficult difficult to navigate it's just not an automatic this is why so often children just do whatever their parents are doing right yeah whether they agree with it or not or have it their own thoughts about to keep the waters level and not yeah and to be accepted loved safe etc um and so if if carter was scared of you scott i'm pretty sure should be watching trailers yeah yeah no that's a good point they have no problem telling me where to go good to know your your children are not

afraid of you i'm not afraid of you dad they have no problem telling me where to go uh and what to do And I would argue it's because you have a solid relationship with Carter and you have a solid relationship with Kim that everyone can do what they want in this story. But it's running into your, oh, don't abandon me in my joy. I'm not buddies for this, right? And in this case, I don't know what the strength of this relationship is. But that is my advice. My advice is parents often take on the role. of parenting and the role, I think it's such a funny word to use because of course I think

of like an acting role. And sometimes parenting is just acting. Yeah, totally is. We're just faking this and we don't know. It's trying not to laugh to reward your children for doing something that they shouldn't be doing that's really funny. Yeah. Yeah. I know. I am so bad at it. My kids have zip respect for my opinion sometimes because I just think very dumb things are funny. Anyway, so you have this role, and I think sometimes, and especially maybe in religious context, I just spent an hour with a very religious mother talking about how she just can't not be disappointed in her kids at like every turn. Yeah. Because the role was to raise them a certain way in her religious tradition, and then they would just do it. And then they're not doing it, so she's disappointed.

and she can't seem to change her tune at all. Whereas the kids are so growing and maturing and changing. And, you know, nobody's baked and cooked yet, including her. But this perpetual disappointment from, I had a role and a job here and you are not fulfilling. I gave everything to you. That's a familiar guilt of people have heard. I've given everything for you to have this life that, you know, whatever.

And you're disappointing me. Um, there's a reason that's being said. It's maybe accurate, but it's also incredibly powerful and manipulative and gets kids to pretend that they're doing the things you want them to do. If I had one, uh, biggest secret revealed to me through therapy is how many hidden kind of ridiculous things kids have to do in order to try to be themselves. This is from the smallest thing to the most extreme, right? Um, and it's because the role is such a dominant, sort of mental structure for the parent in that power dynamic. But if we move role to the word relationship,

like it shifts everything, right? You still are a parent. You still make sure the kid gets what they need. You still draw boundaries. You still, they're mad at you. But that's what a real relationship is. And now from the time they're unsafe to be around a stove to the time that they are your age when you had them that you've got to change to.

And I think I'm lecturing to parents who, you know, this mom's probably not listening to this podcast. But what it does is it hits certain nerves. And what I have found to be really helpful is people can move from role and the sort of jobs they've always had in these, in these family systems and structures to really caring about the quality of the relationship. Amazing things happen. So, for example, this person said, hey, she triggers me like, no other. well of course she does and it's because they're she's still parenting and she's still throwing out like hopeful hook hooks like maybe if you just accepted Jesus you know like whatever they may be why are they triggers it's because she's continuing to do the same thing in just

maybe a different way right and so what would this so I want you to give give us your thoughts what would you suggest that this person does to increase the relationship quality with this mother? Oh, man. Yeah. My take from the whole email. This is why I make the big bucks. My take from the email is kind of a weird one because you've helped clarify some of it for me, but it still seems like it seems like things are going okay. Like he keeps going.

She's a really nice person. She's super nice. He's really kind. She's nice. She's nice. She's nice. And it's like, well, she sounds like she's all right. Like, maybe this, maybe this religion thing is just he can't do the religion thing.

Once that comes up, he just shuts down. Yeah. And I get that. I get it. Trying to figure out what the common ground is that the two of them can, especially if it's a common ground where religion can't even come up, right? Like doing a cooking class together. She's not going to say, oh, Jesus, these cookies are good or something like that. It's like, you know, do something that that is unrelated.

to the difficult point to kind of foster the relationship from a different perspective. Yeah, whatever that may be. So they're going to have some other shared thing. Every grown mother wants from her son. Yeah, maybe they like trailers. Maybe they could sit down and watch some trailers together.

I could be there once a week get together is trailer watching. Yeah, why not. You wouldn't believe how much closer you can get if you just watch some trailers together. Right. No, I don't know. So really, what does every grown mother want from her son?

Um, well, a call every day. Yeah. I mean, if you're going by our mom, it's that. I took mom to lunch last week. Being fed by her probably, like, you're not eating enough. You're not eating well. In our mom's case, all she needed last week for me to take her to P.F. Chang's, that's all she wanted in life. She loves P.F. Chang's food.

And I'll just put it into one word. It's attention. Attention. Okay. Yeah. And it doesn't have to be crazy amounts because she's already used to not getting it. I would assume. And so he poses this question. He goes, I'm not sure what kind of relationship I want with her. I don't know what kind of relationship I want with her. And that is, here's the thing.

Maybe I, maybe I've become a crappy therapist. This time has gone on with family dynamics. But I used to think, yes, let's bring that other person in. Let's talk through all the feelings and the pain. And now I'm the opposite. Like, are they dead? Preferable if they're dead because it's so much easier to work with someone when they're dead.

people are like what and it's because you are not going to get what you need out of that relationship unless you do some changing first and then we test a bunch of things we watch what happens and then usually nine times out of 10 the relationship improves because you stopped you figured out your garbage that you were bringing and they responded well sometimes the person's a sociopath and it's impossible so there we go but in this case what is it that individually that needs to happen. And so if we know that this is an assumption, of course, but we know mom could use some attention.

Mom probably also desperately wants a relationship. Mom also isn't clear how she's supposed to separate her religious fervor from how she interacts with you. I mean, we can make a bunch of different assumptions that if we start to work through and tackle, it's kind of interesting. So, call her and Bitten, she triggers you. Well, what do you do with that?

Do you guys know? I don't know. That's the problem. Like, could you just swallow it down and say, I'm not going to get triggered? Just, you know, brush it off. Yeah, like, it seems like you. Easier said than done.

Yeah, because what Brian's describing is compartmentalization. And that's hard if you're not good at it. You know, I know people who are natural compartmentalizers and I'm not. And so I know how hard it is to. go into a situation, go, I'm definitely not going to feel this way. I'm definitely not going to feel this way. But then you just immediately feel that way. I don't know how you do it. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I definitely do not recommend shoving anything down. That's never, never works that well. And it's actually the opposite of compartmentalizing. It is moving towards the difficult

topic. Like the thing that triggers you, you have to lean into that conversation. And it would look like a combo of things having to understand what your boundaries are about it because what's happening is there is she's stepping over a boundary and you sat one in high school and she responded well to that that's interesting right um and yet you're not it's a little bit of like you're going to give her something she needs because you're going to give her some attention and connection and i want a relationship there's not a mother on earth that doesn't want to hear i want to feel closer to you. I want this to work out. Who then can also hear, these are some of the things that push me away. Can we talk about how we can be closer and not have all the triggering happening?

And that's just a discussion. Now, I get why people want a therapist to help them have that discussion. That's a different discussion than, Mom, you need to hear why you bugged me so much and she is going to say how, well, you don't care about me. Well, true. Both of that happening. There's just rocket science to that. The rocket science, this is the hard part, is like, deciding I'm going to experiment here. I want to be closer to my mom. That's why I'm writing this email. Right.

Right. Already a big step. I want to be close without getting my hand slapped. That's every kid's need. Every abused kid, every neglected kid. It's because it's who we are as humans. And so this is why it's fraught is if you really go out and say it and she rejects you and chooses Jehovah over you again.

That's painful, right? So I say this with the caveat of you got to really think about what you want to do here. Because you can just keep up your walls and be protected from getting hurt again forever. But there is a consequence to having a wall is that there will be the distance in that relationship. So all I know is, you know, and maybe here's ideal. You find a Jehovah Witness therapist and you have them help you. understand where she's coming from and have that therapist help guide this relationship building if possible. I don't know if that's possible, but just this idea of that, you know, this is bigger than whatever her religion is and yours.

It is a mother-child bond that needs nurturing. And if we can get out of the roles and I'm not okay unless my kid is just like me or the kid is, I'm not okay unless my mom fully, you know, accepts everything about you know that's hard this is hard to do in any relationship marriage is anything right children and parents are particularly tough right um anyway there's a lot to be gained from from working hard on this most of us just go i'm tired i got stuff that they're busy and then mom just continues to be neglected to some extent and not get some of those needs met so she will just keep trying to connect through a venue she knows how right yeah and you know It's not, I think it's, I think it's right to, it's easy to say, well, it's the Jehovah

Witness part of this. That's the problem because she wouldn't be this way in some other situation. I get bad news for you, like every, every religion or, or let's just call up whatever personal devotions somebody might have, these sorts of conflicts can come from any of that stuff. And so. Or opposite. It's not, it's not having religion at all.

Right. Right. Right. Right. Anything. And politically, I mean, as we know, like there are family members not competing or communicating with each other at all now that two, four years ago were. And so, yeah, it could be anything. And again, it's humans, we have a tendency to protect ourselves when we're vulnerable, when something's threatened. But here's a kid who grew up sharing his mother with a religion. And that's hard. And I don't. know she could hear that and and sort of see that sort of a core relationship has been affected by her neglect I'm going to call it that that you know and that's tough that's tough for anyone to hear so when you attack her religion you're attacking you know just such a core part of her but what you're really attacking is that you mean maybe you weren't you're not fully present for me yeah and and then get to the real stuff that's why we argue about the outside stuff

because the real stuff is actually very hard to get to and talk about. Yeah. Well, I hope this not only helps, but this feels like one of those we can get a follow-up on because it's less esoteric. It's more just like, you know, how'd your meeting go over there? How did this, your attempt to, you know, push the J-dub stuff to the side and, you know, and how did that go and we can get a good, we can get a good follow-up. Funny side note, I don't know how funny this is, but Winnie and I grew up.

you know, in a predominantly Mormon area of the country. And we used to have this joke that Mormon missionaries would go around the side, or they would go around your yard to the sidewalk and then up the sidewalk and knock on your door. Jehovah Witnesses would just cross right across your grass. And I don't know why we used to say it, but we used to say if somebody ever crossed the grass in any other context, we go, ah, you're J. Dubbing it. You're over there, J. Dubbing it. side note totally nothing to do with this conversation i kind of see the same thing happened

with fedex and uPS actually see and it's it is there is your tribal right like who else goes door to door that we can rip on because they're not on our team right they're not in our team exactly i have a great podcast everyone go listen to group think on um hidden brain the hidden brain episode i think it's this week it's called group think and it's some of the studies that have been done are fascinating like you take someone donating blood or or helping someone else and then you put the opposite team jersey on them it's nuts it really does help you understand why humans suck so bad when it comes to uh some of our stuff anyway it's a good one oh that's uh what's his name um i love hidden brain uh yeah that's great can't they give his name i love that host

he's great it's a hard name to remember because it's it's indian And it's a long name, and it's hard for me to remember. But Hidden Brain's great. People should go check that out. Group thing. And then you think, oh, see, like, they tell a story about Yankees fans and Boston Red Sox fans, right? Because of mortal enemies. And here's just one.

If you're a huge fan, you think Boston and Fenway Park is closer to your house than it actually is. If you are not a fan, you are accurate at knowing the distance. between the two cities. Yeah. So it is a felt threat that is, I mean, that is fascinating, right? Like, you could create literally change distance in your mind. You can get accurate distant guesses for other things, but not your mortal enemy. They're around the corner.

Oh, yeah. It's so much more than just, it's so much more than Coke and Pepsi or Sega and Nintendo or, you know, any of these rivalry brandy Android iOS kind of things. But those sports guys, we're lucky there aren't more dead. deaths is what I'm saying. That's what I'm getting at. Actually, I really think it's why we have less war. That's because of sports. I think it's the answer.

Well, I mean, there's some credible studies. Are you kidding? Without rugby? There would be war everywhere. There's credible studies about, you know, kids playing first person shooters has lowered youth violence. Yeah. There's like direct correlations.

And maybe we need to just, we need to fake it more and then get it out of our system and then don't actually go to war. How about that? That'd be cool. How about that, Boston? Yeah, take that Boston. Go socks. All right, that's good stuff.

We will look forward to hopefully some follow up from this listener. And if you out there are listening and going, man, I got a problem that's either like this or got your own set of situations you want to deal with, you can be completely anonymous about it if you want to and just send us an email the morning stream at gmail.com. That's the morning stream at gmail.com. And make sure you check out real steps.org where Wendy's got cool stuff happening and sign-ups coming soon, right? October? Yes.

Yes, very soon. All right. Watch for that. Oh, next week. Holy crap. Wendy, have a fantastic day. Let me clarify. Next week, the email is coming.

Oh, God it's not starting next week. Got it. Okay. No, good clarification. It's coming. Fair enough. Wendy, have a great week. We'll see you next time by now.

She was going to see you too. She probably was going to say YouTube. She may have said, you go to hell. She may have said. Right. It's probably what she was going to say. I believe that. Well, here's also what I believe.

if the show is done. And how do I know? Because it's that time of day, we're done. We're going to go now. And before we go, I would like to encourage everybody within the sound of my voice to do, please consider supporting us at patreon.com slash TMS. Why? It's literally how the show gets made. If we don't have that, we don't have the show. It's just straight up the truth. You want the truth? Can you handle the truth? Here's the truth. Without you guys and your support of us on Patreon, we're screwed. So keep supporting us. Those who have, thank you very much, and those who might, please head on over there, throw us a buck, whatever you're feeling like, Patreon.com slash TMS. All right, Brian, let's get out of here. But before we do, we need a song. We do. And this is a good one. They're all good ones, but this is one I'm excited to play. No request for this one.

This one is one that came out last month, and I said, I'm putting this on a day. On the first day, I don't have a request. This is the song I'm using So this is the song I'm using This is from the soundtrack to a film called Flag Day That I think came out Last month It's a Sean Penn film

That stars his son Dylan Penn Oh yeah I'm sorry daughter Daughter that's what it is And it's it looked serious That movie Well it's Sean Penn

How can it not Yeah I'm so serious that I didn't even know That he had a daughter named Dylan Penn, not a son named Dylan Penn. I just looked at it and I saw Dylan Penn. It's going to be a guy. But now, yeah, we live in the time where there's Michaels and Dillens and all sorts of it. I should never assume. Never assume. Anyway, the soundtrack came out and it's

got original music by Eddie Vedder, Glenn Hansard, who was half of that fantastic movie once and is just an amazing Irish singer. And Cat Power. Great lineup right there. On the album, they do a cover of REM's Drive that is super cool. Here it, is, here's drive from the soundtrack to Flag Day, Eddie Vetter. Hey, kids, rock and roll, nobody tells you where to go, baby.

What if I ride, what if you walk, what if you rock around the clock? Tick, talk, tick talk. What if you deal? What if you walk? What if you try to get off, baby? Hey, kids, where are you? Nobody tells you what to do, baby. Hey, kids, shake a leg.

Maybe you're crazy. in the head, baby. Maybe you did, maybe you walked, maybe you rocked around the clock. Tick, to talk, tick, talk. Maybe I ride, maybe you walk, maybe I drive to get off, baby. baby Hey kids Shake a leg

Maybe you're crazy In the head Baby Allie Allie Allie And come Oh

Baby Hey kids where are you nobody tells you what to do baby smack crack shackleck tie back tie another one to your back tie another one to your back Baby Hey kids Rock and roll Nobody tells you where to go Baby

Maybe you did Maybe you walk You rock around the clock Tick Talk Maybe I ride Maybe you walk Maybe I drive to get off, baby

Hey kids, where are you Nobody tells you what to do Baby Hey, kids, rock and roll. Nobody tells you where to go, baby. Network. Frogpants Network. Get more shows like this at frogpants.com. Oh God, where am I?