The Morning Stream - TMS 2308: Mouth To Hose

Episode Date: June 23, 2022

A Rose by any other name would be a strawberry. Noooooooooooobi Wan. Yawnsplaining. DeezNuts Chode Butter. Shanter 64. Guy in a Hut Who's Good with a Rock. Loki Is Just A Side Quest. It puts the lotion on the skin or it drinks from the hose again! Turtles all the way down...to the butt. The Cone of Shame and the Diaper of Poop. Checking out a some dude's hose. Flushing the Detritus. Semi Serious, Grandfather of Yahoo. Wongvengers. Long Live J Fred Mugs! The Largest, Gayest Person with Amy and more on this episode of The Morning Stream. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Coming up on TMS, Rose by any other name would be a strawberry. No. Yon splating. Dees Nuts chode butter. Shanter 64. Guy in a hut who's good with a rock. Loki is just a side quest. It puts the lotion on its skin or else it drinks from the hose again.

Turtles all the way down to the butt. I'm sorry, I stepped on that one. The cone of shame and the diaper of poop. Checking out some dude's hose. Flushing the detritus. Semi-serious, grandfather of Yahoo. LongVengers, long-lived J. Fred Mugs, the largest, gayest person with Amy, and more on this episode of The Morning Stream. I am Japanese. My country manufactures the finest information computers in the world.

You know what I think of Nintendo, and he dropped his pants and mooned Nintendo. The Morning Stream. It's a thing with stuff Good morning, everybody. Welcome back to TMS. This is the morning stream for Thursday, January, January, June 23rd. You really want to put us into January. I don't know why, but you really want to put us in a series.

I don't either. Look, if I could do the last six months over, would I? No, probably. It's been an okay six months. It's been fine. We had a great time in Vegas. Why would I want to change that? I don't want to change that.

I had people with COVID around me and I didn't catch it. Why would I change that? Anyway, June 23rd, 2022. It's good to be here, everybody. I'm Scott Johnson. That's Brian. I mean, Brian. Hello.

All right. So a couple things to get out of the way here early in the show. Let's get him out of the way. Let's just knock him out of the way. That's right. Walking the dog this morning and had a thought. All right. She's taking her couple of poops.

I'm so glad yours does it outside the house. Yeah, I do love that. Problems lately? Problems lately. Daisy is developing canine cognitive disorder, which is like the doggie version of Alzheimer's, basically. She'll sit and stare in corners and get confused easily,

and you can just kind of tell, and one of the other side effects is just pooping in the house. I didn't know that. I thought she was a little younger. She's 14. She is up there. Actually, she's going to be 15 next month. She's an old pooch. Well, May she live long and prosper and also poop less in the house. Yeah, I know. I think it's diaper time. Well, they love those, too. They love to have that on. We had a dog that was sold. We had to put a diaper on it.

And then it would try to chew the diaper off. So we had to put a cone on it. And by the time we were done with that dog, it's just a nightmare. I felt bad for it. suit of arbor on this, like a diaper, cone. Yeah, it was no good. But anyway, we're out walking the dogs. Anyway, yes. Rainer did her thing, and we're enjoying it. It's beautiful out.

Great morning for this. Birds are chirping. Flowers smell. You can smell the flowers everywhere. They're just great. Anyway, having a great time. And then I just thought of something because we were talking. Kim and I were talking about secondary water sources, and now they use that to water lawns

and stuff. And we got in this whole conversation about, well, this whole strip of grass is such a waste. That should be zero. that over there like there's so many little spots of like a strip or a little bulb of grass that people put in these neighborhoods that are just it's pointless to have them there now you're got to have water there right so we're like oh yeah and the drought and this and that it'd be cool if they could figure out a way to spend less you know you spend more or less water than we need to

and blah blah blah and then it occurred to me because I was looking at some guy's yard and I saw his hose the question popped into my mind when When was the last time I drank from a hose, like drink water out of a hose? Right directly from, he turned on the hose. Yes, and took water right from it. And I think there's a generational thing here, and that's why I wanted to ask you about it. Because since you and I come from the same exact era, the 70s and the late 70s, early 80s, mid-80s, whatever, our kind of formative years, our growing up years, it was not unusual to drink out of a hose. In fact, at least for me, it was like, it's hot, it's the summer, you're with your friends.

Playing outside with your friends. Right. Go get the hose, turn it on, drink right from the hose. Who cares if there's an earwig in there? You know, you just drink it. And then I thought, well, I haven't done that since then. Like, since the 80s and 90, maybe the 90s, I have not put mouth to hose in that amount of time. And I wondered if you have done the same or if you have recently, like,

like taking a big swig of hose water. No, not in a long time. Certainly not, like the Arvada tap water, at least in our area, there is a very tinny taste to it. It's not good. Like we have to do, if we're drinking any water, we give water the dogs or the cats, then we use this filtered water that comes out of the front of the fridge. Same.

Can't drink the tap water. And because of that, I mean, I'm even trying to think of like when the last time I would have done it prior to that. And it had to have just been, you know, the 80s. Yeah, when we were kids. So here's my thinking. I think there's a whole generation of people who wouldn't dare do this. Like I'm trying to think now, if I put myself in the position of some 12-year-old, hey, drink out of the hose, he'd probably go, ew, no, I'll go in the house. I'll get a, I'm not going to do it.

And like he wouldn't, I don't think they would do it. But what's the reason? You know, let's say the water tasted just fine out of the tap. You're basically, it's the same source. You know, it's, it goes through either a faucet outside your house into the hose or it goes into a faucet inside your house over the sink. It's the same, same source. You're absolutely right. The only difference is from source to mouth is this long, twisty tube of potential spiders and ants.

You know what I mean? so like bugs in there. You don't just put the empty hose in front of your mouth and then go turn the water on. Yeah, but I assume there's like an earwig or something in there that's just hanging on for dear life and then finally let's go by the time I'm actually doing it. That's what I would always think. But like I guess what I'm saying is I feel like it would be frowned upon today in a way. I'm not saying it's like a cultural thing, but I think if I was a parent today and one of my kids went, nah, I'm going to drink out of the hose. like, oh, don't drink out of the hose.

Like, I would be against it, in principle. Whereas when we were kids, let's go. Freaking hose, whatever. Yeah, yeah. I think, for me, it would be less about the spiders and the bugs and stuff, but also, like, the bacteria from, like, standing water in the hose as it's coiled up on the side. So that, you know, turning it on for a while, yeah, it'll flush some big detritus. Is that a detritus?

Detritus, that's right. Detritus, I did say it right. It'll flush the big, you know, little critters out of there first. But if you've got standing water with bacteria, anything like that, then it's going to kind of swirl around and mix in there before it comes out. And so even letting it run for a while might not get that business out of there right away. Yeah, see, that's gross. And I never thought of that as a kid, but I wonder, so now I'm going to go all Alex Jones on us

and say that the reason you and I have not gotten COVID is because we drank out of the hose when we were kids. And it made us strong. Made us stronger. You know, there's probably something to that. I mean, there's a lot to be said for the, you know, the kids who are exposed to everything in kindergarten and grade school and all that sort of thing versus the kids who maybe get homeschooled, who get some advantages in other ways, but then disadvantages and like only getting the diseases that their parents are nice enough to bring home from work. Exactly.

Very well could be. So in commemoration of our discussion about hoses and hose water, I play this. No sloppy hose. No sloppy hose. No sloppy hose. All right. So there's that. I also brought a fun list.

You like lists, right? Yeah, I like lists. Well, good. Depends on what it's a list of. If it's a list of things you don't like about me, then I don't want to hear it again. No, I only have a list of one things I don't like about Brian. And here it is that he's not here all the time every minute of the day. that Scott lives too far away.

That's the only thing I don't like about Scott. Oh, that'd be great, wouldn't it? Like, in studio hanging out? Oh, my gosh. I would love that. Kim would bring us to. Hey, you know, the Justin and Brian did it. Yeah.

You got to see, who has gummies and weed? Oh, wait. I'm going to Colorado, everybody. I'll see you. All right. Come on, down. I'm going there. All right.

Wait, who's closer to Vegas? Oh, I'll be right there, Scott. Just move us both to Vegas. They're salt. There we go. Right. Let's inconvenience both of us. I think that's fair. There's some really nice areas in North Vegas that I wouldn't mind living in, but not right now because it's all going for way too much money. But, you know, in a normal market, you know, I could think about it. That's all I'm saying. Here are some weird facts. I just wanted to share with you.

Okay. All right. Last time you went to the dentist, you had, you know. Typical cleaning, always watching out for that nerve, all that stuff we always talk about. Sure. Yep. well, did you know that humans have been performing dentistry? Let me have you guess first. How long do you think a human has performed dentistry of some sort? If you had to give it an era. So like we're saying when were the first like dental tools created or, you know,

basically somebody going in and looking at your teeth and saying, oh, this looks bad. I'm going to have to pull this out kind of thing. Yes, that earliest of that, you know, obviously without some of the innovations we have in painkillers and things today. but i would say god i'd go way back i would say uh like 14th century like uh that's a good long time ago right yeah yeah i would have said that exact era if it were me but i found out today that we have been performing dentistry since 7000 bc bc holy cow okay i guess now in hindsight i did i do feel

like that was a really bad guess because, you know, you think of like 10th century and 9th century and the, you know, stuff like the hunts and some of this. Some of this might be a guy in a hut who's good with a rock, you know, like. Sure. Well, a lot of it probably would have been. But holy cow, 7,000 BC. Okay, that's, that's a lot. That's a lot. That makes it officially one of the oldest professions. So you got the dentistry, you got the hookah. Okay. Because that they've been going for a long time. The hook is the oldest world's oldest profession is they call it. They do. So it's right up there with that. And the two don't really intertwine. All right, moving on. All right. Hopefully not anyway.

Did you know the very first documented feature film was made? Not here. Not in the UK. Not anywhere. Yeah. I wasn't assigning myself to the UK. You said, not here. Not in the UK. Oh, I guess you're saying, come on. Not here. Also, not in the UK. Yeah. I wasn't assigning myself to the UK right then. here, not in the U.S. Australia, 1906. What were you guys doing down there? The first documentary in Australia. Yeah, they don't say, well, they say documented feature film. So, meaning it's the only one they can document is accurate, but it's not a documentary. It's a full film. Gotcha, not a documentary. Okay, the first feature film. Really, Australia. Yeah, would have been on it. And did it feature Yahoo Sirius's grandpa? It did, with all the hair.

Semi-Semi-serious. Yeah. And then they would have him mouth, something, and then they would show a text screen that said, that's not a knife, this is a knife, and then they'd, you know, keep going. Shrimps on the Barbie and all that. All right, here's this. Ancient Roman surgeons, I love this one.

Okay. We're trained to block out the screams of human pain. They were trained, not only to be a surgeon to go in and like, you know, take your kidney out, but they were like, trained to, like, ignore the horrible time you're having. Well, that's good, right? Because you don't want, I mean, obviously, you want them to be aware of you being in pain, but you don't want them to be distracted and say, oh, God, he just screamed.

Oh, I just cut a major artery. Yeah, yeah. So, like, you know, that's good. I'd rather, I'd rather my doctor be able to tune that out and maybe the nurse be able to say, oh, I think he's in pain. Doctor, let's, you know, let's give him a little bit more anesthetic there or whatever. Sure. Let's have him be in control.

I get it. Yeah, yeah. Okay, now here's one that blew my mind. Okay. I heard once that bananas are berries, okay? Which blew my mind and I was like, are you kidding me? Well, I found out today. Because technically their seeds are on the inside, right?

Even though you can't tell bananas seeds, but. Oh, right. Yeah, well, because technically the banana part is the seed. The peel, you mean? I don't know, is it? Oh, no, right, right. The meat of the banana is the seed. Is the actual seed, right?

Yeah. So we're eating the seed is what we're going to do. That's right. Yes. And the old ones. were gnarly. The ones we have today are all like calm down and easy. But back in the day, freaking ancient bananas, dude, those things were a nightmare. It's like you're eating a shoe. All right. Here's, uh, this one blew my mind. Apples, peaches and raspberries are all members of

the Rose family. And I don't mean, you know, Johnny Rose and his family in Schitt's Creek. I mean like, you know, the flower, a rose. Yeah, this was, uh, this was a, um, uh, a trivial pursuit question at one point and I got it wrong and I had no idea but that's isn't that crazy it's totally weird totally nuts here this one also was weird Canada not the US Canada wait I gotta play the thing

because that's what we do here Canada Canada or conida they eat more macaroni and cheese than any other nation in the world including us really? Yeah yeah think of that that's a big deal

that is a big deal like not France Yeah, or I figure it be us because we're such pigs, but... Well, yeah, right. I'll take it. If you guys want to have that one, that's fine. Tally points out, it's probably the poutine. It's that they have to put the mozzarella cheese or the cheese curds and the gravy on everything.

Is the, is the, is the mac and, can you have mac and cheese kind of poutine combo kind of deal? Is that a thing you can do? I suppose, right? Like cheese curds and macaroni pasta? You could put anything in there you want, right? You could, yeah, you absolutely could. I mean, you're basically going to melt it anyway, melt it down, so it's just going to be cheese, but... Very nice.

All right, here's one that I love. I love this one. Okay. There is a geocash on the International Space Station that was placed there in 2008, and it has since been visited four times by other astronauts looking for it. I love that. Do they have to pop out their little GPS thing and follow the path to get to it? That's crazy. They've got to, like, figure out where on the station it is.

is. I don't know how many of them know about it, but I freaking love that stuff. Does GPS work in space, or how does it, ICOR asks? I don't know, man. It totally wouldn't work in it. I assume it not. This is going to be like written instructions. It's a global positioning system and if you're not on the globe, then it wouldn't work. So, uh, I bet the crap they put in there is so boring. It's like, oh, another screwdriver. Some boring space stuff. Another golf ball. Thanks a lot, Buzz. Yeah, thanks, Buzz Lightyear over there. Buzz. I guess it would be Buzz Aldrin. I was thinking more Aldra than that year.

I hear that movie is not doing too well. I heard, well, it took second place to, what's the one that's killing right now? Jurassic Park is still, even weeks later is still leading, but Lightyear is better review than Jurassic Park, though. For sure. Jurassic Park getting tanked on the reviews, but the, I don't know, people seem to generally like Lightyear. People are like basically thinking, oh, I'll just wait, this will be on Disney Plus before too long. That's what I'm doing. So, yeah, I'm part of the problem.

Yeah, have you watched Dr. Strange now that it's on Disney Plus? No, but I did, I'm so lame and out of it on this. I just heard yesterday that it was there, so we're going to watch it this week sometime, I think. Somebody complained to me. Jeff Delgado, an artist friend of mine online, said that he was bugged how clean everyone is in it. And he misses in multiverse. Yeah. He says he prefers how gritty and grimy and dirty and muddy everybody got in an end game.

because he felt like the stakes were higher when everyone gets a little messed up and Dr. Strange, nobody sweats or gets dirty, he says. I don't know. Oh, I disagree. I think there is a battle in a dusty attic that absolutely are a dusty, like a dusty room.

I guess it's not an attic, but I don't know. That's a weird. It's a weird take, right? It's a weird take. It's a weird take. It is a weird take, but I don't think it's... Superheroes dirty. I mean, that's...

I don't think it's that different, though, than saying you want your Star Wars ships to be banged up and scuffed and not... I think it's a different thing, right? Because those are flying through space. And it's like, you know, there's going to be space dust and rocks and little meteors and flying crap and stuff out there all over the place. But, you know, superheroes have the ability to clean themselves and wash their uniforms and stuff like that. Sure. There's always somebody standing off to the side to give Dr. Strange a nice hot towel that you can just towel off his face. Exactly. That's what you give in here. Oh, my God. Are you going to be able to understand Dr. Strange without seeing Loki?

Ooh, I don't know. Am I? I? I don't know. I assume so because they're not going to make a giant movie that's very expensive that you can only see if you've seen Loki. It's got to be. No, yeah, you'll have no problem. Or should I just watch Loki first? Well, you should watch Loki anyway. way. Okay. I mean, I get, yeah. I don't know why I haven't done it. I just need to sit down and freaking do it. You know what it is? Somebody the other day said something that kind of stuck with me and this is a problem. Yeah. Because now I can't get it out of my head. And Brian, okay. I have a theory too, but let me hear your theory first. Talk me down from this tree. Here we go. They said, oh no, it was one of those memes and I retweeted it. One of those memes of the guy sitting at the table

with a big sign out front. He's holding this coffee smiling. And it's one of those. those prove me prove me wrong or whatever. Oh yes, right, that guy, yes. And it said all MCU movies

since end game are like finishing the main story in a big open world video game and now just doing side quests you never got around to. And that resonated with me a little bit

because you've had, you've had that big thing. Yes, they're going to build up to something new, you know, whatever the next big wave is. But it's, It's just a lot of side quests right now.

It is, right. It's, you know, it's a Black Widow. Let's do a little flashback quest. And, uh, yeah. Shang Chi, which I still say, you know, I mean, so damn good. I love that movie. It was great. Yeah.

Uh, but it doesn't, you know, we just don't know how everything's going to, going to tie together. Kevin Feigey did an interview with the Hollywood reporter last week and said, oh, yeah, we've got, we've got a plan of what the end of phase four looks like that takes us into phase five so sure i'm uh you know i'm i'm i'm waiting before i pass any any judgment but um you're excited i'm excited i'm always excited exor sure you should be your giant marvel fan you should be i'm a giant marvel fan and uh you know and and maybe it's it's because i you know know enough about the eternals that i enjoyed that movie more than the the the audience coming in completely blind or the the um you know the black widow thing or uh i like black widow a lot that was good yeah too i was mostly you know yelena stealing

the movie but it was it really was yeah for sure and then stole uh the the hockey tv show again yeah came in there made that better uh i don't know there's just so much of it i think part of it is not fatigue but kind of just like oh man all these side quests probably is a little bit of fatigue too though yeah i kind of look forward to when we get a proper avengers follow up you know right right right right exactly who are new are we going to get new Avengers? Is Captain Falcon going to be leading a team with Ant Man and folks like that? Or are they setting up a new Avengers led by Wong, which is going to be the Quicksilver kid, or the speedster son of Wanda, the Wiccan son of Wanda? Yeah, you're going to get Ms. Marvel in there. You've got the little Ms. Marvel doing real good so far, which will be in there. Yeah.

Yep. Yeah. I mean, that stuff's super interesting to me, and so it's good to try to keep up. There's just so much of it. And the Star Wars stuff is like, hey, did you watch Obi-1? Yeah, I saw the first two episodes, and then I got behind. Oh, it's over now. Oh, well, shit.

Okay, well, I'll get around to it, I guess. Oh, just a lot. Watch the finale yesterday. It's so good. I really liked the finale a lot, yeah. Was it Vader going, no? The whole, the whole episodes, 30 minutes, or 45 minutes. minutes and what they do is you know he says that at the beginning no and then they

catch to another scene and come back he's like oh oh don't make it better that sounds great no i've heard really good things about the finale so we're gonna we got a punch through that because we really like the first two episodes it was fine and and i'm excited to hear not just what you think of miss marvel when you start watching it but what carter thinks because it feels like this is just so right up carter's alley yeah i've heard this you're not the the first to say that. It seems like it might fit her vibe perfectly. And people are just seem like they're just, all I hear is it's delightful and wonderful and you should watch it and it's great. So we'll get to that one.

Yeah. Okay. Okay. Back to our cool list. Check this out. Oh, let's see. Where did it go? Here it is. This is nuts. Because we brought up just yesterday like the longest running shows, a conversation that we had. Well, check this out. From 1953 to 1957, NBC's Today's, show had a chimpanzee co-host. He didn't know this?

His name was J. Fred Mugs. Jay Fred Mugs. Yep, absolutely. And it says he earned the network around $100 million during his run, however that works. Yeah. I didn't know this. Yeah, I don't know how he was incorporated in the show. I mean, I guess he's kind of like Kathy Lee Gifford and just sat there and drank wine for an hour.

But, uh, yeah. Two days show. I want to see if I can get a picture of this guy. Oh, yeah. It just looks like a chimpanzee. Make sure you're able to tell him from Willard Scott, though. It's impossible. You talk in action, by the way.

He was born in Ogden. Yeah. Well, I don't see. Oh, these are just the monkeys on the Today Show, a band. Hold on. Ah. Let's see. What was his name?

Jay Fred Mugs, two G's. Jay Fred Mugs. Oh. Wow. What was the point of this? Just to be goofy? Just to say, hey. That's to be goofy. Yeah. Okay.

Oh, and occasionally they'd have a second monkey. Here, chat. Look. See? There's J. Fred Mugs, and then they had a little baby girl monkey there, too. And then they had all clocks on the wall. And this must be after the big news drops, right? They're like, all right, well, we just talked about the horrible war in Korea. Now let's just talk about monkey shit.

By the way, J. Fred Mugs still alive. What? He's 70 years old. What? And J. Fred Mugs is still alive. he has outlived two of the co-hosts, two of the hosts that he was on the TV show with. That's crazy.

Yeah. Oh my gosh, J. Fred Muggs. This is news to me. Just never heard this. But I kind of also love it. Yeah. All right.

One more. Let's see if I can find the one I liked. Let's see here it is right here. Oh. This is, I don't have any way to compare this to anything. So listen. Bobby, you in the chat?

Some other science-minded folks, if y'all want to, like, you know, confirm or deny this, we'll give this a little scrutiny. Here's some scrutiny. An animal yawn, so when they yawn, you know. Yeah, yeah. Why did I explain that? Hey, Brian, you know, yawning.

He's for yon-splaining to me, yes. Sorry. All right, an animal's yawn is based on how large their brain is. The bigger the brain, the longer they will yawn. Really? Is that true? And if it is, citation needed. I just don't have a citation here.

Yeah, for sure, exactly. Oh, and then one you'll like. There are more Lego mini figures on this planet right now than there are people on this planet. Really? Oh, no. So they've made over 8 billion of the mini figs, I guess, is what that is. That is insane.

Like, that feels like, wow, okay. That seems bad. I mean, there are many, too, they're way more in this house. I think there are even more versions of, of Thor in this house than, uh, there are people living in this house. Yeah. There's more Thor per capita in Brian's house. Yeah. In my house.

In the other house. All right. Tell me, tell me, tell me what happened on your lift yesterday. I'm glad you liked my little addition there. You didn't really pinch anyone's nipple. Yes. I was expecting, but anyway, um, so, uh, decided to do some lifting yesterday, driving. lift for lift. I should call it that

as opposed to like power lifting or weightlifting or something like that. And start out, nice little short ride took me into Golden and then the little noise. A ride has been added to your cue. It's like, oh, cool, which means as soon as you drop person A off, there's already

a ride waiting for you, a person B. You don't have to sit there and say, okay, when am we getting another ride. That location thing, they tell you that it's near where you're dropping off? Yes. Yeah, they definitely think somebody that is. That makes sense. You're not to have you go cross down for another pickup. Totally. Yeah. They've done that before, and it drives me crazy,

especially going from Boulder up to Longmont, which I had to do again yesterday. Oh, my God. I took somebody from a shopping mall, or, sorry, took somebody from Longmont down to the shopping mall on the far south end of town, a 90-minute drive. It cost them like, I don't know how much it cost them, but I ended up with like 50 bucks out of it. and they just sat and typed on their iPad the entire time. I know if they were responding to email or doing what, but they were quiet. I just had my, I'll say this too.

I had my music on. I figured out that I put on Sirius XM's Chill Station, which is down tempo and house music, right? Yeah, I like it. Because I find that it's, it's, not that it's preferred, by everybody, but it's the least offensive to everybody, or the least, you'll find less people complain about that than, oh, man, 80s music, uh, or, or, uh, or, uh, or, uh, or, uh, whatever. Have you had people complain about music before?

I've never had anybody complain about music, but I know that people would, right? Like, I feel like, like, like, that stuff is just so oral landscape, you're hearing it in a Frickin grocery store, dress barn, uh, those Starbucks, whatever. Yeah, nothing to complain about when you hear that stuff.

Nothing to complain about it. Anyway, so, uh, do my little short ride takes me in the golden. Get my writer added to Q, go pick him up at the school of minds, the, you know,

the engineering school in Colorado. Hmm. Hold up and it's a guy who looks like he's been living in his clothes, his current clothes. Like there's, he's wearing blue jeans and they've kind of got that, that worn brown, gray kind of look to it.

Yeah, I know the type. He gets in the car and I'm immediately hit with odor. Some serious bow. Some B-O. Yes, and all he could do is think about Jerry the whole time. And he needs a ride all the way up to Boulder, 40-minute ride up to frigging Boulder, Colorado. And I'm like, oh, geez, you know, it's like, it's within my rights as a lift driver to say, I'm sorry, man, I'm going to drop you off here.

You can get another ride. They probably won't charge you for this ride, whatever. But I can't be that guy. And I'm even like, I can't be the guy who says, hey, I'm going to roll down the window a little bit. You are I with that? Yeah. It'll be obvious that I'm doing it because you rank. Yeah.

You have to be like Kramer. You stink, you'd have to say. Exactly. You know, I just don't want to be, I don't want to be rude. So we get up to his location and thankfully I keep a bottle of Febreze, like a little spritzer of Febreze in the car just for this sort of situation. It's like, and then the Lyft app says, you know, for every ride at the very end of it, they get their thing that says, was your driver a good driver? Did they do things right and blah, blah, blah. And so they rate, I still have a perfect five-star rating everybody.

Well done. It's because of my EDM. But they asked me, they asked the drivers now the same thing. They said, how was this person as a writer? Would you drive them again? And for the first time ever, I clicked, no. No. And then it comes to a follow-up screen and says, were they rude?

Were they inappropriate? Did they leave a mess? And there's like, no, really wasn't any of those. No. Other. It's a big other. All I can do is put other. And let's admit it, all it'll do is basically just, you know, give him a three-star rating as a rider.

And then it'll never match him up with me again. That's good, though. That's good. Because you don't need that in your car. You'll leave a stain after a while if you sit there. And then I'm like, oh, man, is he going to look down at his lift score? And now all of a sudden see that his lift score went down and be able to connect it to me? I don't know.

How does that work? I assume they don't. I assume they keep that stuff. enough anonymous right they do but i mean you know if he only takes one lift ride yesterday that he's gonna pretty much know which one did it to him some people can't some people can't distinguish between a napkin and their own pants and that's and i know people like this where it's food it's dirt it's i don't ever wash these oh yeah i think it was a matter of he had not showered or bathed i mean you know it's possible he was homeless he spent 30 dollars on a ride up to boulder um so he's

more than likely carless did it all through his phone i guess yeah right so he's got a phone i don't know it's just wild he's got a phone he's got a payment plan and yeah i just felt i felt really bad and yeah i would have now so you asked the question what would you do um yeah i think would you stop and just say sorry man you've got to get out no i wouldn't do that i would do exactly in fact what you've done done all the way to the thing you submitted is 100% what i would have done because I think it's fair in the moment you were you were a gracious host and did the thing I think is the right thing so I would have totally done that I think the follow-up thing with the rating is totally fine too but I think they should give you some granularity as to why and that's not a you problem that's a them problem they should let you say if you're going to say other then let me just put in a quick word you know hasn't bathed in a long time or something right or right exactly there's got what is the right way like like, because smelly or, you know, give me, like, what's the right way to put it, unhygienic, poor hygiene, maybe. And maybe chat room suggests, and I don't know, it could be true that this guy was like, he's at some really physical labor job.

And this is how he looks every day when he's done. And who knows the reason he needed to lift and couldn't commute because his car is in the shop. I mean, it could be a million things. But I don't know. If I were him, I feel. like I would be cognizant of how grody I am and that I'm going to be in someone else's car for a while. I don't know. Yeah. I don't know. I'd have to have, I'd have to have a, if I'm going to do a Lyft or an Uber, if I'm in that condition, it's got to be some desperate thing going on,

because otherwise, why would I be like that? I would think so. And you know what? Then this is a better way of handling it than making him feel bad and that sort of thing. What, what Lyft should do is wait until he's taken three or four more rides and then do like the scores for his last five rides, right? And say, okay, now we're going to average these out and attach him to what you got. And then if they told you, you'd find out, oh, he was a billionaire the whole time and he was testing to see who would treat him like crap or not because of how gross he was. Maybe that's what happened. And whoever did, whoever treated him the best gets $2.4 billion. $1 million.

Yep. And you and Brian ain't going to get it. it now because he hit other oh man yeah i hit other exactly i said i would not drive him again oh well i missed out on that million oh well plenty more millions to make you'll be fine yes exactly all right uh well well done that was great and uh so what we've learned today is don't drink out of a hose in 22 shower uh at least shower before you get in a lift yeah you don't i'm not going to tell you have to shower every day but if you're going to be around other people maybe shower yeah and also know that if you give, listen, men out there, or ladies, when you give your significant other

an apple, you're really giving them a rose. Oh, right. There you go. See? We got you a dozen rose things. Uh-huh. It's cheaper, cheaper, but it's still in the rose family. Right, exactly. I'm sure she'll be just fine with it. I'm sure it'll be no problem. All right, red fraggle, incoming. Yeah. Yeah. We're going to get her in here. We're going to have us, have us a segment here, folks. So stick with us while I push a button that I can't find. Here it is. Right here.

Ah, that music cues the inevitable moment where we talk to Amy, aka Red Fraggle, about what to read this week. Yeah, that's right. This is Read This with Amy. Amy, welcome back to the show. Good morning, friends. How's everybody doing? Doing good.

How are you? Super. I am doing well. I want to take. a couple moments. I promise I won't spend too much time on that. But I, so as people who are on the Facebook and the Discord and whatnot saw, I had a very tragic thing that happened last week that, of course, echoed back to previous tragic things that had happened in my life. And so that was really, really hard. And so I wanted to say thank you to everyone who reached out

to me or even, you know, just commented and support this community. is amazing, and I just wanted to thank everybody for being really kind and when I really needed it. So that was really cool. I'm very glad to hear that everybody did that. It's a, you know, it is a good community in that way. When people, when it matters most, people tend to belly up and do nice things, say nice things, help out where they can. I don't know. Kind of a rare thing. It's a good community for that. It's a great community for that. Yeah. So I'm glad also that you could have the time you needed to sort through some of that. stuff and we don't have to get into details but um yeah no i really can't talk about details but

i will share i will share a brief thing if i if i may of course always one thing that that kind of helped me through it because you know when stuff like that happens you know somebody dies suddenly especially if they die suddenly violently whatever uh there's survivors guilt and you know i know a lot of people who i know it's not just me but this is my experience with it is oh if i had just done X, Y, Z, this person would still be with us, right? And so there's a lot of that. And so I started thinking about there's an old story that my mom told me years and years and years ago. A lot of people have probably heard this story where there's a village that's flooding. And this old man is there and the boat drives up to him and says, come on, man, we got to get out of here. And he says,

oh, no, no, I'm okay. God will save me. And then, you know, the water rises and now he's on the second floor of his house and another boat comes by and they say come on man we got to get out of here and he says no no i'm okay god'll save me and then the water rises up to the roof and then a helicopter comes by and you know tries to tries to rescue him and he waves them off and says no no god will save me and of course he drowns and he's standing there and he looks at god and says why didn't you save me. And God looks at him and says, are you kidding me? I sent you two boats and a helicopter. What else did you want? I heard that. I heard that once when I was a kid, that entire thing. That's stuck with me pretty hardcore. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And but the thing is, and this is what

occurred to me this past week. And it was, I found it really helpful. So I thought I would share in case anyone else has experienced feelings of kind of survivor guilt or I should have done more to help or save this person. No one hears that story and thinks badly of the boat drivers. Yeah. Right. Yeah. Right. No one, no one hears that story and thinks, well, that boat driver should have gotten out and drowned along with him. You know, nobody thinks that. No, they're just props in the story. They just don't, they don't consider that point of view very often. It's a good point. Right. Exactly. And so, you know, and it's so it shouldn't, be expected that, you know, we will suck ourselves down into an abyss to try and save someone.

And we don't think that of anyone else. And so Wendy, Wendy says this all the time in real steps, you know, being kind to yourself is one of the hardest things to do. So, yeah. So that was, that was a thing that helped me get through this week. That and I have an awesome therapist. Yeah, that's good. Anyway.

I'm glad to hear all of that. I'm glad you had some of that stuff to fall back on. I'm glad Wendy's around for this stuff. I'm glad our community's here for you. This all makes me happy despite the horrible circumstances that require it. Yes. All right. So on to happier things in today's book.

Books. Yeah. Books. So this is, I know I'm late to the party because it's the freaking 23rd, but it's Pride Month. Oh, yeah. Right. So today's book is in that theme. And feel free to go ahead and play that clip whenever you would like.

Here it is, enjoy. When I was little, my dad used to tell me, Will, you can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose. But you can't pick your friend's nose. This seemed like a reasonably astute observation to me when I was eight, but it turns out to be incorrect on a few levels. To begin with, you cannot possibly pick your friends, or else I never would have ended up with Tiny Cooper.

Tiny Cooper is not the world's gayest person, and he's not the world's largest person. But I believe he may be the world's largest person who is really, really gay, and also the world's gayest person who is really, really large. Tiny has been my best friend since fifth grade, except for all last semester when he was busy discovering the sheer scope of his own gayness, and I was busy having an actual, honest-to-god group of friends for the first time in my life, who ended up never talking to me again due to two slight transgressions.

Interesting. thing. I want to know more about Tiny, the giant gay person. It sounds great. So this book is called Will Grayson, Will Grayson. And it's written as a collaboration between John Green. I know, nobody's surprised. I'm recommending a John Green book. But also David Levittan, who is an openly gay author. And he writes, he writes lots of YA stuff, but also lots of very LGBTQ-friendly gay stuff. I think it's his first major book that got traction was Boy Meets Boy. And his stuff is really good. And it's a really interesting, fun book.

There are two separate characters in the book, both of whom are named Will Grayson. And John Green writes for one Will Grayson and David Levittan writes for the other. Oh, that's wild. That's a clever way to do it. Yeah. And they all sort of come to. together around this guy Tiny Cooper and so it's really honestly like Will Grayson is kind of as you say like the prop they're kind of the props in the

story and the real story is about Tiny Cooper so yeah it's it's it's great and it's as funny the rest of it is as irreverent and funny but there's some there's some more interesting a little little more emotion heavy things going on in there and it's a it's a it's a it's a way a story so there's some teen romance there's some love triangles there's all that kind of fun things in there but are the uh the styles of the two writers different enough that you can kind of tell as they're writing when it shifts or yes even down to even down to like david levitan at least in will grace and will grason his writing is almost teenage text speak it's you know there's very little capitalization and and things like

that. So absolutely is, it's a dramatic shift. Yes. You can definitely tell, oh, this is where John Green is writing and this is David Levittan over here. So, yeah, it's not, it's not good omens where you're kind of, it's kind of iffy, which, which pieces are Neil Gaiman and which pieces are Terry Pratchett. No, no, you can, you can tell. Okay. That's interesting. That's a great question, too. So this is, for those who don't know, John Green's your fault in our stars guy, right? Yes, that is correct. A bunch of other stuff, too. But if If you're trying to make a, you know, a target of where you've heard that name or what you've seen before, that was the fault in our stars guy who made everybody cry with the fault in our stars. Is this, is this thing make you cry a bunch or is it, is it good, you know, good times as well, like fun, you know.

Oh, yeah. This is, this is mostly good times. I mean, like I say, there's, there's a little bit of heavy emotional stuff going on in there, but it's typical teenage emotional stuff. It's not. It's nothing. There's nobody, you know, none of the kids die of cancer. anything like that. Whenever this comes up, I always think of that girl in eighth grade, not my eighth grade, but the movie eighth grade.

Oh, okay. Directed by Bo Burnham, that movie. And she's totally unrelated, but I just, just figured out why she looks so familiar in Barry, this season of Barry, the girl who's like the young actress working with Sally on her show, that's the girl from eighth grade. Oh, interesting. So not the, not the woman from. the good place. No. No, no, no. But, like, I see her and go, oh, oh, oh, okay.

Like, she's awesome. She was also in that Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake that came out last year or this year, whatever was. Yeah. Anyway, sorry. Side, side note there. So you say this is a YA novel, a young adult novel. Would you say, you know, old farts like us would enjoy it or, or what? I mean, I did.

And, you know, I mean, you guys were kind of giggling at the front there. And so, yeah, that's most of the book. It's kind of funny. And it's, I think so. I mean, you know, I enjoy teen stuff. But yeah. And I mean, David Levitan has written many things that we all know. We just didn't know they were his.

Like, for example, the, Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist was first a book by David Levittan and then was adapted into the movie with, oh, what's her name? Darcy from the Thor movies. I know who you mean the new girl what broke girl yeah yeah a broke girl yeah yeah cat dennings yeah that's her she's the nick and norah's infinite playlist cat dennings that's her yes and and and he also wrote this is actually really funny and when I was researching for this spot I learned this he wrote a book called uh dash and lilies book of dares, which was then made into a little mini-series that came out on, I think, Netflix over last Christmas. And my daughter made me watch it because it was really, it's very cute and fun.

So, yeah, but he's written, he's written a lot of stuff. And he's done a lot of editing on stuff that, you know, people, people know. And he wrote a couple of, you know, novelizations, which I don't tend to enjoy those as much. I like the other way around when the book is so good. They have to make it a movie. I'm like, I don't really need to read a book about a movie, you know, like I ever saw the movie. But I don't know. That's just me. Do you watch, um, did you see the, the Christmas movie he made? So I guess he wrote a short story that got turned into a Netflix Christmas movie called Let It Snow, which also appears to be a young adult thing because it's full of teen kids playing these roles. But, uh, that did, that reviewed really well, but I didn't

even heard of it. Yeah. Yeah. I have not read that, but it's on my list because I think that John Green can you know contributed to that one as well yeah and that was the collections of short stories he seems to be doing just fine this John Green fella oh yeah doing okay doing all right he's doing all right for himself for sure yeah well I still mad at him for making me cry during the fault in our stars because I remember I remember going into that going ah teenage thing this is no big deal this is going to be easy and then I walked out going yeah yeah anyway did you guys Did I ever tell you guys that I was in a little short film once? No.

No. Yeah. So I'm going to, I'll post the link in the chat. So a friend of mine named Vandy Beth Glenn, who she was one of the first trans people who was fired for being trans and took it to court and won her job back. And so she made a little fun little short. film about that and I have a teeny teeny little part in it but of where are you in this what like what minute I'm about so go forward a little bit more yeah I'm the receptionist or yeah minute 19 I'm the receptionist yeah okay let's take a look here there's me yep all right so we're

walking through a hall and get these two nice ladies talking okay the hallway we're coming to the end sorry I must not be the right thing we skip ahead oh there we go so that's Amy That's awesome. Look at you being all secretarial. I love it. Oh, man, you're like Pam from the office now. I freaking love it. Totally, yeah.

That's great. I'll probably get a take care for shows. The best part of that part was like when the little guy was up there talking to me, he's being smarmy and trying to be funny at me. And I just kind of stare at him. Like, yeah, I don't want to talk to you or be funny with you. I want you to go away from my desk now. You know, what's throwing me is your hair was so long back then.

Yeah. I know, I know. Weird. It was. I'm growing it back out, but it's still pretty short right now. So, yeah. But yeah, so, you know, go, feel free. Go, go check that out.

It's a, it's a hilarious fun little video about kind of people's perceptions about trans people. And there's a little funny commentary there about how, you know, cis people always. think they can tell and they're really often wrong and you know the stuff that that people say when they don't think anybody is is listening and yeah so it's it's fun it's cute it's a 10 minute little watch I learned some years ago not to do that anymore maybe 10 years ago I remember seeing somebody and saying I think that's I think that's a trans person and the camera whoever said why I said why just isn't there like if they have a big Adams apple isn't that a thing where you can just tell.

Like, I had this moment of, like, I thought I knew the little secret trick to tell. I was wrong. That was totally wrong. And what's dumb about that is that my sister, Wendy, who's beautiful and lovely, has a sizable Adams apple. Has some other chode sat on the street somewhere and went,

I'll bet that's a trans person looking at my sister? I don't know. There's a lesson. I had to learn. You have to learn these things. There's a great Twitter account, And I can't remember her name right now, and I feel bad. But it's a trans woman who really often just goes on the conservative side of Twitter and says, oh, really?

You think you can tell? And then she posts pictures of like, Gina Davis. Sure. Yeah. And they're always like, oh, yeah, I can totally tell that you're trans. Like, look at your jawline. We're like, oh, my God, that's Gina Davis. That's freaking Gene.

Yeah. Not only you stupid, you don't watch movies. What's your problem? She drove off a cliff with what's her name and Susan Saran. Yeah, we didn't get to see how it ended. Right. And she does it, she does it frequently and they keep falling for it. I think most recently she had pictures.

And it was pictures of Kelly LeBrock from weird science. What? What? Oh, they just assume because she's got such a strong jaw line that she has to be a dude. Right. Yeah. And it's, it is really funny to just watch her kind of troll these people. It's, you know, I'm normally.

not for trolling, but that, that is really funny. That's some fun trolling. My favorite trolling is a scammer, that scammer YouTuber guy that, uh, oh, he's great. He plays an old, yeah, plays an old lady and, and these scammers freak out because he just, he ends up getting money from them somehow. Yeah. And they get all mad. I'm actually worried about him.

I hope he has, like, security or something. I'm worried about the dude. He's going to get targeted or something by some psychopath who's had it. I don't know. Anyway, uh, well, there you go. This is a fine recommendation. foundation everybody so if you want to go check it out will grason will grason is what it's called it's both audio and book forum wherever you get those things uh amy anything else you want

to mention before we go um yeah um so yeah the southeast meetup in september still happening so yeah i haven't we haven't really moved forward on any other plans yet but we've got the place booked and we've got we've got plans all cooking september and uh my husband chuck are really kind of running that. I'm just sort of the person who keeps talking about it. So I don't really, you know, it's best that I don't plan things because I would make a mess of it. But they're good at planning things. So they're planning. This is, you sounds basically, Chuck is Kim and you're me, you're me basically in this relationship. Yeah. Yes. That is exactly. Nothing wrong with that. We're all a team, everybody. It's all good. That's why you marry people that are perfect for you.

All right. Well, well done. And it's always good to hear from you. I'm glad. things are a little less insane than they were last week for you, but continued good luck in that regard. And we'll talk to you next time. Thanks, guys. Good luck on your ride, Brian. Thanks. Appreciate it. Do you have enough chode butter or do you need some help with that?

I bought an extra tube that I'm actually going to keep with me. Oh. Oh, yeah. I'll have chode butter for miles. Miles of chode butter. He really can spread that chode butter out. Yeah, oh yeah. It's like what's the brand I'm getting? It's funny.

It's something like DZ nuts or something like that. I mean, it is like, there is no hiding what it is. I like that. Just own it. Go for it, right? Like, who cares? Sounds fine. If they called it Chode Butter, I'd be thrilled.

Yeah. Nothing wrong with that. Let's see if I can find the stuff I bought. Just get it on Amazon. DZ nuts. DZ nuts. DZ nuts. Great.

Taking an old vine meme and turning it into a business. I love it. Right. They're smart. They do what they're doing. They do. We're smart too, but we can't be smart until we take a break. And when we come back, we're going to do a little call now with listeners. Actually, you know what we may do? We may just do the news. I might do that. You know what? That's what I'm going to do? Because we didn't get to any of it. So let's take a break. We'll do a song. And then we'll come back and we'll have more.

Brian, what song will be playing? I'm playing a song by, you know, how I always like to say where the people are from. like, oh, we're going to Melbourne, Australia, or we're going to Nashville or whatever. This person is smart enough to just put it right there in their name. Leon of Athens is the artist today. They've got a brand

new single, and they just appeared up over at Bonaroo shows supporting Arley. They're going to be at Summerfest in Wisconsin. They just finished a tour, he just finished a tour with Yoke Lour, shaky knees, and primavera Sound.

this song is great this is just some some great pop fit right perfectly right in with what we usually play here the song is called ripped up t-shirts features hip-hop artist west period joining him on this here is leon of athens hit me with electric thunder i just want to feel alive i'm running like there's no way back and I don't want to go because every time I feel dragged under you make a little spark ignite

exploding in the deepest dark and I don't want to go high in every way riding every minute on a runway watching all the birds fly out of the cage with every beat my heart gets stronger dancing in a red top t-shirt dancing like

freak of nature i'm gonna let you rip my heart out losing control i don't need no nobody else i don't need no nobody else ripped up t-shirts everybody's losing control make me feel like i'm on fire underneath it's blood red light i'm running like there's no way back and nowhere else And then you say my name like it's never been said It's like a chemical running out through my head And I need the rush cause I want you the most Don't tell me you can know where to go Dancing in a rip-top t-shirt

Dancing like a freak of nature I'm gonna let you rip my heart out Losing control I don't need no nobody else I don't need no nobody else else ripped our t-shirts everybody's losing control that they want to know why my shirt got holes in it pull up in the whip with a whole bunch of girls in it hello little mama been a minute since i doves in it hella de-stress denham but you know

them things are souls because if i don't kill the vibe yeah i know you want to love me but it hurt me when you like i told you um i used to want to see us but now i'm dancing on my own again t-shirt ripped up Dancing in a ripped-top t-shirt Dancing like a freak of nature I'm gonna let you rip my heart out Losing control I don't need no nobody else I don't need no nobody else

Ripped-top t-shirts Everybody's losing control Rift-top t-shirts everybody's losing control Are you keeping up with the Commodore Because the Commodore is keeping up with you The algorithm felt it wasn't hitting the right taste clusters Hey, Purdom

This is the morning stream Bye-bye all right we're back please tell me once again who that was we'll do that's the artist leon of athens and a brand new single called ripped up t-shirts nice now real quick this thing i played that commodore commercial yes yeah was that i don't remember it playing in the states and the commercial that followed it because i just captured that little jingle part they were all Australian. I need Australian listeners. Is that, is that, was that your thing and we didn't never get it or did I just miss it somehow? Because I feel like I was pretty tuned into every

commercial that ever came on in the 80s. Don't remember this one. And consoles and stuff like that. Because it's for the Commodore 64, right? Yeah, it's a 60, the Commodore 64, which, you know, as far as where it played, it played everywhere, or it played, where it sold, it sold everywhere, including the U.S., but I just don't, I don't know if we ever got that ad. It felt like our ads were like Alan Alda or something weird, you know, wasn't he doing that where Alan Alda's like, yeah, computers, it was it, hey, yeah, but what was it, was it for the Commodore? I do remember it. It was Atari. Yeah, I remember George Plimpton for the Intellivision. Yep. And oh, you know who did Commodore commercials here? Was, uh, Captain Kirk

freaking, um, oh, Shatner? Shatner, really? Yeah, okay. That's what I'm thinking of those. Shatner 64. Well, then. That's a console I want to buy, the Shatner 64. I played that on my Nintendo. Here it is. I'll play one just for funsies. If it'll work. When it comes to video games, nobody compares to Atari. I find Intellivision more sophisticated and lifelike.

Gentlemen, move over for my friend Vic. The Commodore, Vic 20. That's what it was. Vic 20. I think of the, that, you know, I find the television to be superior. That's totally got to be a play. I didn't see the guy, but it's got to be a play on George Plimpton. Oh, totally, right?

It's got to be, I mean, it reminds me of him. The way he talks and says, I find the television. Hello. If you don't know who George Plimpton is, a lot of you do because you've watched Aladdin as kids. And in the Aladdin movie, there's a scene where the genie, played by Robin Williams, does an impression of George Plimpton. Oh, really? Okay, I forgot about that.

And I think a lot of kids love that impression, but don't actually know who he's doing. Where it comes from. I think that happened a lot with his improv because people are like, what? It's like, Tony, here's my senior, I don't know. All right, let's get to some news here. By the way, the news is brought to you by what, Brian? One last push for donations for my bike ride coming up the day after tomorrow. Basically, 48 hours from now, I will be three and a half hours into a five and a half hour, hopefully, ride.

So, oh, my God. thinking about that time frame. Geez, Louise. Anyway, that if you want to donate, even five bucks, ten bucks, whatever, we've blown away every goal that I've had, so you guys are freaking awesome. Go to tiny.cc.c.

comaville 2022. That's all lowercase, bike coverville, 2022. How was your aunt these days? She's good. She has been working so much. that she hasn't had time to ride. So she's going to do the, the 40-mile, quote-unquote, quote-unquote short ride,

a 40-mile ride that takes place up in Fort Collins. So she's not going to do the full 150, but she's going to do what a lot of people would consider to be a pretty dang massive ride. That's a massive ride. By any, I mean, certainly by my measurement, 10 is a lot for me. You kidding? That's amazing. Yeah, exactly. So she's great.

Saw her this last weekend. I rode from my house to their house to Uncle George and Aunt Barb's house, which is 35 miles south of me. And she met us about a quarter of the way, or three quarters of the way there. George met me about halfway, and then she met us about a quarter of the way. Nice. And you said, hello, Barb, please turn your head while I reapply chode butter. Thank you very much. That's exactly right.

I said, I'm reinserting some chode butter into my. my shammy. Oh, it uses a shammy? I don't know why that makes it worse. It's called, like, the, I don't know why it's called a sham, like, C-H-M, I'm sorry, C-H-A-M-O-I-S. Yeah. Because the actual term is shammie butter.

Oh, that's, that's, that's, or shamy cream. Yeah. But it's, uh, but it doesn't use a shammie. I think that, that, that, maybe that chunk of padded stuff in your crotch and on bike shorts. is considered a shammy. Oh, okay. So if you wanted, you could spread eagle on top of a car

and shine that thing up real good if you wanted to. Certainly could. Yes, geez, Louise. All right, moving on. Check out this story. Hong Kong. I've been there. It's a cool town.

Uh-huh. I like it a lot. Recommend it. Uh, it's a very cool place. Very clean. I liked it a lot. Anyway, Hong Kong's iconic jumbo floating restaurant capsizes at sea.

Oh, no. Who knew? Uh, Hong Kong's iconic jumbo floating restaurant has capsized in the South Sea of China, less than a week after it was towed away from the city, says its parent company. The restaurant encountered adverse conditions, a perfect storm, if you will. On Saturday, as it was passing the Xishi Islands, also known as the Paracel Islands in the South China Sea, the water entered the vessel and began to tip, according to Aberdeen Restaurant Enterprises LTD.

The company said no one was injured, but the efforts to say the vessel failed as it capsized on Sunday as the water depth at the seam is over 1,000 meters. It makes it extremely difficult to carry out salvage works. It said in a statement, it said, the company is very saddened by the accident. Let's see, almost 80, the ship, by the

way, or this restaurant's 80 meters, 250 meters, or 250 feet, 260 feet, can't read in length, have been a landmark in Hong Kong for over four decades. I remember hearing about it when I was there. Never saw it. Serving Cantonese cuisine to over three

guests, including Queen Elizabeth the 2nd and Tom Cruise. Not at the same time, though. This thing is amazing. Like, how huge. I was thinking, all right, well, it's going to be a vessel that maybe holds, what, 12 or 20 people and let's the meet. This thing is the size of like a small Vegas hotel. Yeah, it's monstrous.

So to have that all go under, this, none of this is good. This is bad. And it's funny. I didn't realize the actual name of it was the jumbo. I thought that the headline was just describing it as a, jumbo floating restaurant no it is it is the rest floating restaurant called jumbo jumbo yeah i remember we were there we we discussed doing it but it was really expensive and this is like mid-auts or whatever so it was really expensive at the time and i'm sure it's more now but uh boom there you go

underwater fish is uh this is so totally going to set back the uh introduction of the flying uh restaurants like we see in the fifth element back several several years yeah before they Yeah, that guy pulling up to, is that James Hong? That wasn't James Hong, wasn't James Hong, wasn't? No, it wasn't James Hong. That was a missed opportunity. They should have made a James Hong. Right.

Ah? Ah? Ah. I said Lilu Dallas. I yell, Dallas. No one answer? I hang up. I love him.

National Treasure at James Hong. 97 years old, finally got his star, his walk of fame. He deserves some kind of lifetime achievement award. I mean, you know. Yeah, he's stuff. to buy it here, right? But give him an Oscar Lifetime Achievement thing. You know, I was thinking the other day, there's some

many amazing character actors that never get that recognition. Yeah. We should do that more. Character actors that have just worked the hell out of Hollywood. You know who, like Stephen Root? Give that guy a Lifetime Achievement Award. Stephen, it's a great example. Look at his IMDB. It's insane. Not usually

going to be, you know, not, you know, not, not ever likely to be a leading character, you know, in the lead actor in something, romantic comedy or something. For all I know, he's never been, I don't think. It's always been ancillary. But he's perfect. He makes everything he's in better. I saw him again and justified.

Of course, he's on Barry this season. Last two seasons, he was amazing in. Incredible in Barry. So good on Barry. Freaking, what's his name not true? Yeah, so let's do this. Let's get rid of the Irving Forbush Lifetime Achievement Award 20-minute patent people all petting themselves on the back thing out of the Oscars and replace that with

five character actors of the year award or recognition. Love that idea. More than just, because all you do is you wait for him to die and put him, and then maybe remember to put him in the ad memoriam thing. The memoriam. Yeah, exactly. Freaking bastards. Hollywood, man.

All right. Next story. In a pinch, you might be able to breathe through your butt hole. Okay. All right. Boy, pinch. yeah it's not a great term i don't like pinch being involved no says this we generally don't like oh this is an article on yahoo dot com so take it for whatever yahoo dot com news articles are worth but

we generally don't like to think about the fact that there is a large worm-like organ inside of our abdomens that sort of thing would usually only have to make peace with when watching horror comedies like slither i don't know why they brought that up that's weird but it doesn't stop I never saw Sleather. That's a sneak horror movie. Yeah, but it's what's his name? Guardians guy. Guardians director, right?

Oh, really? I think so? Like an early thing for him? Paul Feet. Not Figue. No, no, no. Yeah, I know. James Gunn, that's it.

James Gunn. Yep. Yeah, I never saw that. He wrote it and directed it. I didn't know that. Yeah. Why don't we have this on our, look at that.

Nathan Phileon, Elizabeth Banks, Michael Rooker. Why have we not seen this? I don't know. This is before he went huge with anything MCU related, but why would that see this for film sec? Let me clarify, yeah. Yeah, we should watch it for film sec. Duh.

Yeah. We totally should. Um, anyway, despite being among the creepiest of your internal organs, your intestines play a crucial role in your everyday life, blah, blah, blah, we know all this, uh, getting all the oxygen you need, uh, uh, let's see, um, sheaves, blah, blah, okay, so here's the deal. In the winter, turtles slow their metabolism and get most of the, their oxygen through their cloca cloaca i think so i say it in a process i love the pause right

before you're gonna have a use of euphemism for anus yep yeah i got us you know we got them we got emphasize the the emphasis uh it's called cloacal respiration other reptiles and amphibians use similar respiration techniques to breathe out breathe without using their lungs so if you happen to be a mammal. However, it's like hard to, hard to believe this would work. But recently, some breakthroughs, Brian. So if you're in a pinch, let's say your pinch is trapped in a hole or a guy's got me in his trunk or... I'm down headfirst in some quicksand. Yeah, yes, there you go. Your body's down, your head. I mean, I think you're probably still not going to survive, but... No, no, probably not. Let's see. That's the way you get by

by arms of, how do you relax yourself enough to be able to breathe out of your, your butthole? I don't even get it. Like, what do you? I could tell a story that I think will mark me and I don't want to say, I don't want to do it. Oh, no, now you have, you set it up. Do I have to say it now? Gosh, dang it. You can.

I'm not going to let you pull this, Johnson. This is the era when I was putting screwdriver bits in my nostril to see how far it would go. Okay. So keep that in mind. We're talking like seventh grade. I'm bored on a Saturday afternoon. So far from that now. So yes, we have a hard time imagining that was ever a time that you would do that.

So here's what happened. I, for some reason, wanted to know, okay, gosh, dang it. I can't believe I'm saying this. It's, you know, that zone down there, it's an exit only zone. Sure. For old Johnson here. It's not interested in any. other activity there you know it's for it is what it's for but i remember once in seventh grade

uh laying on the floor once again bored and there's no screwdriver bits to put in my nostrils so what else am i going to do i decided to to sit in kind of like downward facing dog yoga position i wouldn't have known that at the time but that's kind of what it is and i learned how to I learned how to suck in air and then blow it out again through your butt through my butt and my sisters

my sisters who were horrified can confirm this because as soon as I figured it out I was like Misha Wendy get in here you guys got to see this and I would like did you

I figured out how to do it and I could you know I could like really did you have to you didn't have to do any sort of manual manipulation cheek manipulation No. Nothing. Really. Yeah. It was a weird. And honestly, I think it may have been the only time I attempted it. Because I don't think I ever, like, it wasn't like after that. I was like, I can't wait at school to show everybody this. Three o'clock, there's the bell. Time to go home and breathe in. And suck in farts.

There's my very intimate seventh grade horror story. Hope you all enjoyed it. That's hilarious. Somebody said, Matuba said that back when we were kids, we called those farter starters. I've never heard that before fart or starter so I wasn't the only one apparently not yeah a lot of people that's always true right you're never the only one doing a dumb thing someone who said that they've done this yeah

yeah but it wasn't like you know it just was like oh no way I can make my own fart it was just like this moment of discovery recycling is basically what you're doing kind of what I was doing exactly I was helping the environment Brian don't let anyone tell you different very good excellent

uh French's has unveiled Canada. Canada. There it is. Next favorite summer treat, the ketchup flavored ice pop. Ooh, oh, I don't know about that. Well, I know I would probably try it, but I ain't buying these. No way.

No. Let me put them up on screen. I mean, I try, you know what? Let me phrase that. I would try it for the show. And you've had V8 tomato juice. I love the 8. You like that cold.

Yeah, I love it. Had one this morning. Had a spicy V8 this morning. There you go. I don't think this. be that far away from that. I know it's ketchup versus V8. Yeah, I tend to agree. I think it would be okay. We try it and then if we hated it, we'd never have to do it again. That Lewin's ice cream or whatever the name is, the unusual name, they've got a gray Poupon flavored ice cream.

So you could have your mustard ice cream and your ketchup popsicle. Yep, let them melt together and then dip your corn dog in it. Mm-hmm. Well, it says here, the French is known for its iconic tomato ketchup have unveiled a very questionable summer treat they call it unless maybe you're Canadian the French sickle a ketchup flavored uh ice pop created by Frenches the condom maker was released as a summer snack for limited time only so Canadians get in there I never get it done do you connect Frenches with ketchup I only connect them with mustard so Frenches makes ketchup too they do but I only think of mustard you're right we have been we have either either we're less exposed to them as a brand like we all have hines or whatever yeah maybe

in Canada, French's, does both. And you guys do ketchup, everything up there. They put on, like, potato chips and, you know, they flavor stuff with ketchup all the time. And ketchup has a big sugar content. So maybe that's what makes this tolerable. I don't know. Anyway, here's the catch.

You have to trek to the Great White North to get them. So if you want them, that's the best you can do. It's currently available in Vancouver, British Columbia, Toronto, Ontario, and Leamington, Ontario. It will be there until June 24th. only got a day. Your condiment just got a lot cooler, says French's on a social media post. I love creating treats that appeal to Canada's diverse tastes, says happy pops founder

Lila Keshevi. I started happy pops to bring all natural, excuse me, natural handcrafted flavor to Canadians. So French's locally grown ketchup is a perfect pairing. Hold on. Locally grown ketchup. I guess tomatoes. Tomatoes. Okay.

It seems like you'd say they're, I don't know, it makes it sound like there's... Catchup made from locally grown tomatoes, right? Yeah, I think I'm supposed to assume it, and that's probably right. Sure. Anyway, if a Canadian has these and then we'd like to freezer box them to us, we'll eat them, but that sounds really expensive, so don't do it. That's a very expensive proposition, but we would totally do it. We would totally do it, but I don't want you to spend that money, so unless you're, like, loaded, you know.

You're like Mike Myers living in, you know, Canada or wherever, whatever, whatever. Some famous Canadian has all the money in the world. Justin Timberlake is getting ready to send these to us. I always forget he's Canadian. He is, isn't he? Yeah, but I'm sure he lives in California. Did he really bring sexy back, though? I think he did.

Did he? I think he did it in a big way. Okay. I mean, not just Janet Jackson's nipple, I mean. More than that. You know, I'm sorry. Not Justin Timberlake was born in Tennessee. Justin Bieber was the Canadian Justin.

Okay. Yeah, I knew that. but I bet it's easy to mix you know whatever they're all heart throbs and it's got to be may and all that's right exactly uh thousands of fine the chat room did not nobody corrected me thank goodness on that one on i'm thinking just in timber lake we all think yeah justin tiberlake is nice he could be canadian sure he seems nice enough he seems all right and there's probably some story i don't know about keep your emails to yourselves all right thousands of penis fish i love today's news washed up on a californian beach I don't know why it's just a California beach, not Californian beach. Why California? It's a Californian beach that belongs to California. It's a Californian beach. California.

Oh, my God. Look at these things. It's like I'm watching, uh, what's that TV show, Big Mouth. It is like that. You know what else it's like? It's like, uh, those, those muckbang eater, ASMR people, just they eat these things. This is a delicacy in some parts of the... Holy cow.

Wow. some of these 10-inchers they can grow up to be 30 centimeters in length and that's how big they can get apparently have been disturbed picked up from their quiet life and strewn across the beach as far as the eye can see

and people are stoked about it they're all running around taking pictures this thing's also called the fat innkeeper worm I don't know why yeah but only by the people who just don't want to say penis fish yeah that's a good point

why wouldn't you let's see I had no idea what they might be I went on for two miles, says David Ford, a local resident, who was out there checking these things out. Just to make you feel a little more sick, he says, I walked for another half an hour and they were scattered everywhere. There were seagulls lined up on the beach the whole way, having eaten so much they could barely stand. Oh, there's a great joke in there somewhere, right? Yeah.

Would you eat one of these? Like, it's a bit, they eat them in Asia. They eat, they, they, they, it's a delicacy in some Asian countries. I imagine, right? I imagine, you know, if it was served as a sushi, like, you know, in a roll or something, probably. Yeah, why not? Little penis fish never hurt anybody. I just, I don't think I'd want it to look like this when it's on my plate.

Like, basically, you know, fillet it, deep fry it something, but, uh... Yeah, don't have it in that shape. I don't want that. Not in that shape, yeah. Cut it up in little circles. Nope, I don't want the D, the D fish. I don't want the D fish. That fish is a real D-fish.

All right, moving on. We're done with email. That's going to do it for the show, everybody. My sister should be back in a couple of weeks. I'm not sure if it's next week of the week after, but she is enjoying some time out with her family in parts of Europe. So, Scandinavia, if you will. It's probably a little weird over there because, like, Finland's right next door to, well, both Russia and, you know,

how does it work over there? they're next to something. I mean, it's close to Russia and Ukraine. Yeah, Ukraine's butted up against them, I guess. And Russia was all pissed at them because they just signed the NATO. They got into NATO against Putin's wishes.

So I was like, oh, do you really want to go there right now? It just seems like they're a little targety. Aren't they separated by the? They have a border with Russia. I know that. They do northern border, right? Yeah. Border.

Let's see here. But, you know, like, I'm sure it's fine. and they haven't done anything. They haven't followed through. Oh, yeah, here it is. Russia sends nuclear-capable missiles to the border with Finland. See, they're...

Oh, yeah, they do a long... I did not realize that, that their whole eastern border is Russia. Things could get nukey, you know? Yeah, yeah. I don't want things to get nukey. We can help it. All right.

World problems aside, we wanted to thank all our patrons for supporting the show. Patreon.com slash TMS. Big thanks to everybody for doing it. The show doesn't exist without. you. So your continued support means everything for us and the morning stream. Gigantic thanks to all of you. It's still time to get in for the month ends.

Next month. Brand new stuff, of course. And there's plenty of reasons why you should join. Just go read about them at patreon.com.com slash TMS. For all other inquiries of any kind or sort, you can find them at the morning or sorry, frogpans.com slash TMS. That's what I meant to say. And if you'd like to email us, you got a problem, you got a happy thing to tell us. You're mad. whatever the morning stream at gmail.com okay brian uh before we go any um programming notes uh no coverville today because you're riding right no coverville today no guess the connection tomorrow yeah i'm going on a long ride today 25 miles plus today just to be the last big ride before the or really the last ride before the big ride um and so uh yeah oh i'm also going to be a guest on

the Pokemon go podcast tonight for their special 300 first episode. Why? 301. Because I was 301 because I was, you know, a regular on there for a long time and celebrating 301. Really, they celebrated 300, but I was at the concert last week. Oh, okay. It's still an iconic number.

It's cool. It's still an iconic number, yeah. You should have waited until 311 and then worn something with amber in it. Oh, it would be the color of my energy. Yeah, the color of your energy would have been the amber color, yeah. Anyway, well, that'll be good. Watch for that. Film Sack this weekend.

It's in the form of a watch. along we watched bay watch and uh we've been putting that out why well because brian will be gone so not a not a normal film sack this week but we do have content for you and there will be dungeons this weekend and i'm oh core tonight big core coming up check it out core tonight we got core core's great we love core so be there for core all right that's at five o'clock tonight uh for if you want to be their live all right that's it let's get out of here we need to play a song what you know uh annette moss wrote in and said, happy birthday to my wonderful husband, Devin. Maybe I'll buy you a tender crisp bacon, cheddar ranch.

Oh, I think that's a cue. Two clips. Let's see, hold on here. Trumboliker. That's not it. Here it is. A tender crisp bacon cheddar ranch. What was the other one?

Birthday. Oh, birthday is just the birthday. Okay, here's that. Happy birthday, do you? Well done. I love that one. She says anything by, any covers of or by the band Rush. Well, no problem. Rush several years ago, back, wow, almost 20 years ago, released an album called Feedback, where they covered a lot of the artists that influenced them growing up.

Speaking of Canada, one of those bands was The Yardbirds and a song called Heartful of Soul. Here is Rush from Feedback covering Heart Full of Soul. Sick, get on and lonely, deep in dark despair, thinking one thought only, where is she tell me where, I'm there, she says to you don't love me, she don't love me, just Give her my message Tell her of my plea And I know That if she had me back again Then I would never make her sign

I've got a heart For a soul And I know that if she'd have me back again, that I would never make her sad. I've got a heart for a soul. She's been gone such a long time Longer than I can dare But if she says she wants me Tell her I'll be there

And if she says to you She don't love me Just give her my message Tell her a mile be and I know that if she had me back again then I would never make her sad I've got a heart full of soul This show is part of the Frog Pants Network. Get more shows like this at frogpants.com.

I have a good excuse. I'm part gay. Oh, happy Pride Month, everybody.