The Morning Stream - TMS 2798: Donkey Hautay

Episode Date: March 24, 2025

Fat Fudd. Serverance. We're Ooga Chaka Free. Exposed elbows. Both the Rootin and the Tootin. Why don't you tell ME the specials! Swingers, put your golf-balls in the bowl. Used toes, taste tested. Tell me the ropes! Chips Momen. One Of Us, One Of Us. Used and gently vomited. I have a penis so I'm probably wrong. Mom's Dr. Zhivago, with Dunaway. All Roads lead to Einstein with Bobby and more on this episode of The Morning Stream. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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and a powerful legendary samurai as you explore a beautiful open world in a time of chaos or just listen to two american dork nerds named scott and brian they need your support at patreon.com slash tms coming up on the morning stream fat fud serverance we're ugachaka free Exposed elbows. Both the Rootin and the Tootin. Why don't you tell me the specials? Swingers, put your golf balls in the bowl. Use toes, taste tested. Tell me the ropes.

Chips Momin. One of us. One of us! Used and gently vomited. I have a penis, so I'm probably wrong. Mom's Dr. Javago with Dunaway. All roads lead to Einstein with Bobby and Moore on this episode of The Morning Stream. Space Invaders is a video game cartridge you have to buy separately to play on the Atari video computer system. Now do you want to try for the $32 question?

The Morning Stream. Don't eat that. It's Pluto. Hello, everybody. Welcome to TMS. It's the morning stream for Monday, March 24th, 2025. Oh, we almost got our 25, 25. That'll be tomorrow. That'll be tomorrow, yeah. Don't forget. Be prepared. Whatever did you do to prepare for a stupid number thing. I don't know what you do.

Start baking your cake to frost with a 25-325 if you're in Europe or 325 if you're here in the U.S. Yeah. However you celebrate, be ready. It's going to be a big deal tomorrow. It's nice to have you all here. We're going to get right to it. Scott and Brian, by the way. Hi, Brian.

Hello. I don't know if I said our names. I think I said our names twice. That's fine if we say them twice. It's all right. So totally okay. You know, it helps people really don't remember these things until the third time you do it. Or 2.5, Maslow's stage of learning, hearing things two and a half times before you actually take it in.

We keep getting hounded for that on core because we'll mention video games that are hard to keep track of and we'll only say it once or twice. And then people write in and go, say it a third time. I didn't get it. Shit out of luck.com. Yeah, you've got to end the story with it, too. By the way, we were just talking about Batman Arkham Shadows. That's right. Go get it.

Punch some bad guys and be the Batman. I got a quick server question. No, this is not for IT professionals. Okay. All right. There's more for you, Brian. I'm going to ask you this question. Oh, okay.

All right. Do you think it's appropriate for somebody who works at a place that brings you food, takes your order, brings you food, restaurant? You know, you know the deal, how that all works. I'm familiar with a good restaurant. And we, so we go to Slackwater again, love it there. It's always a kind of a go-to. And Kim and I just need a date night.

And it's always a fun place to go. And you always have to remember to bring your ID because sometimes they'll sit you in the tables near the bar. And to do that, you have to have ID first. But if you sit somewhere else, you don't have to have ID. This has zero to do with the story. But I thought I'd mention it because it's such an annoying thing. And bring your visa because Slackwater doesn't take American Express. That's right.

Oh, my gosh, such a pullback, that reference. Yeah, you were those commercials, yeah. Oh, my gosh. Those guys were each other's throats back in the day. They really were. It's like, we found another place that doesn't take American Express quick. Yeah, put it in the ad. Anyway, so we go to this place.

We love Slackwater. Great place. There's two of them. The one nearest us is now kind of our go-to. Lovely place, love it. And usually the service is awesome. And it wasn't bad this time at all. But the service is great.

The food is incredible. Their wings are insane. Like, the place is great, and they got sports going up on the board, you know, in case you're a sports fella, you know? This is the time, right, with all the March Madness stuff? Was it busy with all the March Madness going on? In fact, that whole area over there where the TVs basically were closest, just jam-packed with people. And they were all rooting and tooting, you know, like you do. Of course.

And I'm not that into, and if Utah or BYU was in there, I'd probably watch some games, but, and they are in there, I guess. But they're just, they're not going to go very far. I know how this works out. been around this planet a few times csu just got taken out made it to the second round but did not to the sweet 16 so well there you go then i don't even know we were out but for all i know we're already out i have no idea we didn't i haven't checked at all but uh anyway so those are our two chances really there's only two schools to compete and the rest of it is just us going out for for food so we're there and this this uh server comes to us she had these very cool tattoos first thing i noticed about her from her wrist

to her elbow which was exposed she just had the most intricate patterns of, I don't even know what they were, and I wasn't going to like stare, but they were really, like, jumped out as like a cool pattern, like cool contrast and complicated art. It was really neat. And I thought, oh, we're getting someone cool. They know what they're doing. She's, like, been around the block. She understands, like, what it means to have a cool tattoo, you know?

For whatever reason, I'm thinking that's going to help our, help our server issues. Sure. And she shows up. And the first thing out of her thing, out of her mouth was, well, she hands us the, she hands us menus. And then she says, or Kim goes, ooh, I wonder if this is any good. And she points at something. And the server lady goes, show me the ropes. I'm new. I don't know. Tell me what's good here. I don't know. That's how she says it. Okay. And I looked at it and I went, well, I mean, you know, and then so my brain, I'm like, well, I'm going to say something here. I said,

well, I've had the hot honey pepperoni pizzas very good. And I also really like that dip thing. And she goes, oh, I love the food here. I love it here. The food is so. good. I'd love the food. She acted like she'd never have the food there and needed you guys to tell her about the food. Yeah. That's my, that's the whole hang up is like, wait a minute. Wait a minute. I says to where I says. Uh-huh. So I said, well, are there, you guys have any specials? She goes, I think that's on that little menu there, she says. It's like a little strip. And I, why'd you tell me what the specials are? Yeah. I was having one of those Kramer moments with the movie phone thing. yeah right and um eventually we just ordered what we liked and she goes oh i love the art of choke tip

such a good choice i'm like but you said you didn't know any of this and she was you know what speed wise get the stuff back to us check on us we're giving me a fresh coke zero all that stuff no problem slickety order accuracy was good all that stuff all of it nailed it she was great customizations yeah earned a great tip like she was awesome i just don't understand the presentation it was an odd way to. I don't know what's here. Okay, well, I have that. Oh, I love those. But wait, you don't know. Exactly. It sounds like you're dealing with the bell jar or something. Like, you know, multiple personalities. Like, oh, no, Marie has never had the food here. But I'm Jennifer. I've had all the food. It's really good. Oh, the artichoke dip is so good. But I've

never had the food here. Yeah. Yeah. It was like, like she was playing, maybe I watched two movies this weekend that probably messed with my head a little and then made me question her motives. So I watched Sicario and then I watched Heretic. And both of those movies are full of brain effing. And I kept thinking, is this a, is she, she doing this on purpose? This is a way of, someone in the chat even referenced it. Is this a way of her validating our choices to really pump up what we like? And then she's like, oh, yeah, I don't know anything from my perspective.

as a server at this establishment, but clearly you are the best customer ever, the best idea. Like, maybe that was what her deal was? I don't know, man. It's funny. It's almost like you want to say, you know your experience as a patron here can be applied to your experience as a server as well. So if you like the food here and you like the artichoke dip, that's something that you

can actually use in your current position as server. Yeah. Yeah. And even later, even later she came around and said, how's everything going? Is everything good? And I said, man, these wings are awesome. She goes, I know, right? And I'm like, do you know?

Do you know? I don't believe you know. I don't think you actually know because you already said that you didn't know. And now I'm really confused. But anyway, it was fantastic. I still, despite this weird, freaking severance side episode that I had with the server there, serverance. I had a little episode of serverance over the weekend.

I'll be your serverance. It was that. Welcome to Slackwater. I'll be your Audi. Yeah. And your Audi doesn't like to have servers that are weird. It's a very, very good place to eat. So I'm just saying if you're in town and you're like, oh, yeah, we got to go somewhere.

There's nothing wrong with Slackwater. But just, you know, if you get tattoo arm lady and she goes a little off, just understand what you're in for. It's all fine. Nice. I'm about, we're three episodes into Severin. Since the finale came out, team and I have now approved it for binge. Nice. And we are currently binging him.

Are you, season two, I guess, because you're already done with season one, right? Season two, yeah, yeah. Boy, I needed that recap, though, of season one. I remember, I remembered, like, major plot points, but forgot so much of it. It's almost like I need to watch a screen crush, you know, 14 hours and 13 minutes screen crush recap kind of thing. Yeah, it is, it is thick that first season. It's deliciously heady. Yeah, and then season two is very heady, which means,

doubleheady double header i guess uh yeah i might i have one episode to go i didn't watch the finale yet but i'm i'm i'll have the finality probably done tonight and uh man that show it's so great dude like i know i know the the rumors are not that they can't afford this but apple loses about a billion dollars a year on their on their tv projects and um that's just that's a that's a that's a lost leader kind of thing where they're like well we got to We've got to brute force our content because how else you're going to compete with Netflix and everything else. So they're willing to lose that kind of money. And they have so much of it, a billion dollars is nothing to them.

That's like zero to them. But please, please at least finish this series. You have to finish this series. So no more products for now. Just work on that one because it's so good. Gosh dang. It's your best product right now. Unless you'd ask Randy.

Randy thinks it's gone off the rails, but I think he's wrong. I don't agree with Randy. So far, I'm, yeah, so far I'm really enjoying it, so I don't know. Well, I just found out there are a whopping two of me in the world who has a certain feeling about a certain song. We had a discussion about the Uga Chuck, a part of that hooked on a feeling song. And we got it, somebody wrote in, for hay, four, but I think he just meant hey. He put a four there. Four hay.

Four hay. This is Nick in New England. Let's see. First time texter here. I'm usually a show behind. So this goes back to episode 2793. I'm with as if that means anything to anyone. I love our numbers at this point because it's like,

oh, way back on episode 2794. I will say this. If they don't give us enough context, it does give us something to look back and say, oh, he's talking about the woolly mouse story or whatever. Oh, good point. You know what? I'm with you.

Go ahead and keep using those numbers, you guys. He says, I'm with Scott on hating the Uga Chukas in the blue minks hooked on a feeling. When I first heard them, I laughed. Blue mink. Is that right? Blue Sweet is the Blue Sweet is the hit

Jonathan King was the first one to add the Uga Chalk There was a band called Blue Mink But didn't know that they did a version of Hooked On a Feeling They probably did, I believe it. I think he's either mixing it up He probably means Blue Sweet Yeah I would assume the blue there

Yeah Anyway hooked on a feeling When I first heard them I laughed and thought Is this real? I disagreed with Brian though The song is boring without them Isn't boring, sorry That would be agreeing with Brian

What am I saying? Without them B.J. Thomas in 1969's original is far better. Not only was he a great singer, but it also produced, was produced by Chips Momen. You know who that is, Brian?

Chips Momen. I don't know who Chips Momen is now. We love that name, though. Isn't that great? Chips Momen. I'm Chips Momen. And I'll represent your thing. It's like, it sounds like a gambler.

Ah, yes. Over there by the roulette table, you'll find Chips Momen. It's like Fats Domino. It describes. He's currently in the zone. Don't cool his table. Anyway, he says he'd later work with Elvis.

Suspicious Minds was also written by Hooked on a Feeling songwriter Mark James. Plus, it has an electric sitar. That's kind of cool. Anyway, how did you just chime in? He says, oldies from the 60s and 70s are my thing. Love the show. Always a bright spot in my morning, Nick, from New England. I think it's just me and you, Nick, because everybody else who is written in,

all in support of keeping it in the song. Oh, and why don't you read any of those emails, Scott? Well, somewhere long and somewhere, basically. basically just confirming it, but basically, I just wanted to make a stance so that on this island of two, me and Nick. You're definitely not, you're definitely not alone. I know that there's, Rob L. in the chat room even said he doesn't like the Uga Chalk either. There's, there's quite a few people who don't. And I just think, I think it's a, I re-listened to the B.J. Thomas version this morning, because I was reminded that there was, like, Blue Swede changed the lyrics. I don't know if Jonathan King changed the lyrics or Blue Swede changed the lyrics. but they took out an addiction reference saying you know something about i have to call my addiction blah blah blah to be sure um wow and and blue sweet i think for radio airplay changed the lyrics um i did have to look by the way uh um bj thomas's version did make it to uh number five on the billboard uh singles chart hot 100 singles chart it's not bad blue swede made it to number one

for a while. Okay, well, the Uga Chukkah took it further, really. But, you know, that's, you know, but making it to number five does Lynn Creightens that there's, you know, quite a few people out there left. B.G. Thomas, I mean, you know him from raindrops. Keep falling on my head and, hey, won't you play another? Somebody run, somebody wrong song.

Which is every song, by the way. Every song is somebody done somebody wrong song. He's just, it's just, I don't know. I feel like it's, um, it was the first cover I remember hearing because since both of them were radio hits, I remember hearing the Uga Chaka thing and saying, oh my God, this isn't, this is that same song, but it's not the same way. And then my love of cover songs was born. There you go. See, this is got that day. These are deep roots, man. It's my origin story. Was the blue sweet, uh, hooked on a feeling. So, uh, Nick and, and you, Scott, you guys, please continue to prefer the Ucichaca free. version of hooked on a feeling

but I like to go into a record store and go excuse me is this Uga Chaka free exactly I don't know how many versions I have in my library but I'm guessing that

you know probably a third of them are probably Uga Chaka free like like gluten we try to keep Uga Chaka out of our version Is she Uchaka intolerant?

I am yes please give me a version Matuba says like Laurel or Yanni I guess No, that was people not knowing what was being said. This is people not liking or liking what is said. There's no question about what they're saying. Nobody's going, are they saying boogachaka or lugachaka? No one's doing that.

Right, right. Basically, it's more like the comparison of the fantastic original version of a new hope where Han shoots first and then this horrible new aberration of Star Wars with McClunky and Grito shooting first. And going, Uga Chaka. Someone needs to do an edit now with Uga Chaka. Get it in there. That'd be great.

Ocachaka. Yeah, we'll play it on the show. You have my guarantee. Yeah, excellent. TMS Vegas update, Brian, give it to us. Yeah. So we talked about this on Friday, but since it's a Patreon-only episode, there might be a couple people out there who have not heard this, but we have moved Catwoman. We have moved Catwoman mini-golf to Monday.

So Swingers' Minigolf will now be our welcome and icebreaker event. Video games are moving to Tuesday, so make sure you go check out TMS Vegas. And if you have not registered, gotten your team all signed up for Swingers, please do so. It looks like we've finally filled up the 6 p.m. slot, and we're working to fill up the 6.30, which is great. We're going to load the chorus with Tadpoolers. I know that there's somebody or at least one person when I looked the last time. who is not part of a team and there were no open slots. So please, if you have not gotten your team together or registered,

go to the spreadsheet, add your players and grab that person who's out there. If we don't find a place for them, what we'll do is we'll bring them into somebody else's team or we'll take one of the other teams and split them up or something and add them. But I don't want to see anybody get left behind in many. And if it's not clear to listeners who are going, swingers is a golf thing. It's a miniature golf thing. Swingers and the golf. It is.

We keep calling it swingers and I just worry a little bit. I know. It's such a cheeky little name that is funny when you know what it is. But when you don't, it's something you have to feel like you've got to explain. You have to explain it. Yeah. Oh, what are you doing in Vegas? Oh, I'm going to an event for one of my favorite podcasts.

It's a show called Timas. Oh, cool. What are you going to do? Well, we're going to do swingers on Monday. What? Yep. I mean, when you say, you know, arcade game, arcade bar competition, there's no question of what we're doing. No question.

But when you say we're going to swingers and you say, ooh, is the logo a pineapple, upside-down pineapple? Like, what are we doing? I wonder if our friends from the average swingers podcast are still listening. And if they, if the swingers community is actually upset by this. Oh, good point. They might be. Yeah. Yes.

It's flagrant misrepresent. As Otto said about the stoner's pot shop, it's flagrant misrepresentation. That's right. We're using your keyword in vain, that's what we're doing here. That's right, exactly. Also, speaking of video game tournament, there are still six spots available in the tournament. Guess what? It's free.

And, oh, share that photo I sent you if you can. Oh, the text. Oh, the lit up. Yeah. Yeah, the lit up. I reprinted it this time with a mount inside for the light. And I actually had to do some dremeling to make it work and fit and all that stuff. So rad.

So, um. check this out you guys put this up for Brian here we go this is from look at that thing look at that sexy now it's never had lighting before so if you win this year you're going to get a very unique version of the trophy this is without any art yet and he and I are currently experimenting with what will look best in terms of maybe capturing some of that light effect and have it look cool and all that but it's going to be this custom thing that will never be more than one of these ever made you'll be we'll have one do one every year no but I don't know but I I mean this year's with this. Oh, yes. Yeah, you're never going to see this again in this particular form. So if you want to win, brush up on your skills. Get out there. Get ready. Anyway. Yeah, it's exciting. Sign up. Sign up. It's any, it's really anybody's game. You really can, you know, unless you challenge Amy at Gallagher, you've got a really, you've got as much chance as anybody else of winning. That's true. Speaking of tournaments, we haven't really talked about this on the show, but there's also going to be a Marvel Snap tournament.

That's going to be going on concurrently with the board game of Palooza. Very easy to do the two simultaneously because all it takes is two minutes for you to pull out your phone, your iPad, your whatever, and play a game of Marvel Snap against somebody else. But yes, a Marvel Snap tournament that will be going on at the same time as board game of Palooza. I'm playing. I'll be knocked out in the first round. Don't worry because I like stupid decks that are fun but are useless against 90% of the meta out there. Outside of you, do we have ringers in the community that I don't know about? Who's like the big hot shot in our group?

I mean, Amy's really good. When Amy and I played in Savannah, I think she took the, we did a, what they call it. You play multiple games, multiple rounds against the same player, and it's once you lose 10 cubes, you're out. I can't remember what it's called. Anyway, we've played in that format. Conquest? We played conquest against each other. And she was really, really good.

Luke Seidwalker is a player, TV's Travis is a player. I wonder if we could, if people are on top of things, we could maybe potentially involve folks who aren't able to be at TMS Vegas as long as they are on top of things and are ready to play when we're doing board game of Paloosa. Oh, that'd be cool. Yeah. So if you want to do that, sign up. but you have to be available.

Like a fair number of Canadian fans, for example, who are not coming this year because of reasons. They might want to play. September's not going to make it, but she's great at Marvel Snap. Dino Spamoni is really good at Marvel Snap. So it's a way of maybe feeling like you're part of TMS Vegas without being here if you can't be here.

Also, I want to also address that. I'm going to say also many times in one sentence. Sure. I did want to address that because I talked to somebody over the weekend, Gene, in our listening audience. Hi, Gene. Hi, Gene. I'm not going to say hi, Gene. Hi, Gene. I'm not going to say hi, Gene. Okay, say hi, Gene is on the fence about coming because he might have to come alone.

His girlfriend may not want to come with him. And I want to stress how wonderful and welcoming and what an inclusive community the Tadpool is when people come to TN. M.S. Vegas solo. You are only solo from the time you get off the plane until you get to the first tadpuller you see. And all of a sudden, you are not solo anymore. This is the most welcoming group of distracting freaks you'll ever find, and they will wholeheartedly welcome you into their community. Oh, yeah. You are one of us. So do not fear that. You will not be left alone. You will not be the person at the dance who is sitting in the corner, sipping on a drink, staring at everybody else dancing.

Exactly. Not that we're dancing, but you know what I mean. Like that's the... Yes, you will be one of us in no time. And, yeah, you've got to... So definitely consider it if you're at all on the fence just because you would be coming alone, let that be the least worry in your mind

because you're never alone when you're in the tadpole. That's right. We've even had a couple people who, I remember one year, somebody was off on their own a lot, and I think Kim or somebody noticed and went, we can't have that. So ran right over, introduced a bunch of people. And by the end of this thing, they were as big a part of it as any.

So if you're worried about any of that, you shouldn't worry about us. You're in a safe and happy place. Everyone's welcome. You could have three noses. We'd take you. It's fine. Yeah. As a matter of fact, we'd probably take you sooner if you had three noses.

We would. So those people with three noses, please. Yeah, and you could detect problem areas before we could. Yes. You might have to change rooms several times at the plaza, right? Cheesy G? Yeah. Once you turn on the water, if you've got three noses, you might be more susceptible to...

She had a stinky water problem. Poor cheesy G had a swamp water issue, yeah. It was pretty bad. But they took care of her. It all worked out. They did, absolutely. The plaza is fantastic, and they'll take care of it. As a matter of fact, I'm actually going to see our contact, our new Bernadette.

We're going to see her tonight because she's coming to Denver, so she and there having dinner with her tonight. Very nice. Were you taking her anywhere special? Anywhere cool? Um, she's taking us to Ocean Prime, which is, uh, like $40, $50 a plate steak place. Fancy. Yeah. Ocean Prime.

That's the, that's the transformer in charge of the oceans on Earth. It is. Exactly. It's like, uh, swim out. Yeah. And then they realize they're not waterproof and they all. Exactly. Yeah.

Rust, oh, no. Well, that's great. You'll have to report. support back on the quality of the ocean prime food that'll be great we'll do and uh and i'm i'm you can't wait to uh to to to prep uh our contact uh about the fun that she's about to have with our group at the end of in about a month almost in exactly a month from now yep prep your calendars it's coming fast folks get ready yep and then uh last thing uh daily music headlines today is the first day the first episode the first real episode the pilot was up a couple weeks ago

but today is the first actual episode, and it's up. Hammond got it posted while I was prepping for TMS, so you can go listen to it as soon as you're done with this episode of TMS. Please do. Don't do it yet, then, later, wait. But you're going to get stories today about Kirk Hammett and Metallica, Eddie Vedder, they might be Giants, has some new stuff, and Howard Shore, not Howard Jones, be nice.

Howard Shore, also some news about him. on this first episode. Ooh, I like me some Howard Shore. He's great. Yeah. So if you're worried about it's going to be all the crap that Brian likes. No, it's everything. Like, you know, although I do like everybody that's listed here.

Yeah, it's the crap he likes plus a bunch more. Okay. That's right. A story about AI, a story about Stubhub. Yeah. Yeah. And the Howard Shore, I assume it's a movie related bit of it. You don't have to spoil it, but something like that.

No, he got an award. He actually got the Gunner's Award for really good glasses. No, the Gunner's Award for Musical Innovation and performed with the London Symphony Orchestra. And a bunch of other people got awards. And we'll talk about each of those. But some people whose music as nerds, we all love and appreciate it. That is the T's right there. There you go.

Big T's, get it. It's Daily Music Headlines, part of the 18th. Ness Network. Fantastic stuff. Super stoked for everybody involved. And you're involved, too, so, you know, as you listen, you'll be looking at Scott's amazing artwork. Yeah, stare it at the whole time. Never let your eyes leave the visage. That's right.

The magical look that you give the artwork. All right, we're going to call Dunaway. We're going to have some fun. We'll see, well, you know, we'll get to be to turn. TBD on the fun. Weh, wah, wah, wah, wah.

Hey, what do you there, Brian Dunaway. What are you doing? Scat and Brian, what's going on? Hey. Hey, do you remember this? Dunaway and I've been back and forth on a lot of retro stuff lately, and I wanted to share something that I found that I think he would like, which is this one. Let's see if I can find it. It's more G.I. Joe and Barbie crossplay that we talked about on the little character

show. No, unfortunately, no. But, uh, that's too bad. Here it is. You're loud and clear. You like, you like G.I. Joe better than Ken. I do like G-IGO better than Ken. I absolutely would rather pull his string than Ken's string any day. Here is a, just see if you can remember where this is from.

I'm going to play it for you, all right? Here you go. I want to be a dive bomber. Sound familiar? Do you remember this? Not really, but it sounds like every Bugs Bunny cartoon during World War II that I've ever heard. Well, you nailed it. You did it.

You got it. Right, right, right. Yeah, yeah. I don't think I'm specifically remember that. Was that fat Elmer Fudd? Do you remember really big fat Elmer Fudd? Oh, I love the fat Elmer Fudd years. They were like, very, very different those years, but they were also pretty good.

Yeah, big fud, fat fud. Before you were on Ozambic. Yeah, exactly. Well, let's get straight to it, folks. I think all the fat went to his head, though. What was that one from? Oh, that was one of those World War II. I wouldn't call them propaganda.

Is it the train films? Kind of, yeah, it was like, our tanks are made of molten, whatever. and it would just squeeze out of a machine and suddenly there'd be a tank. That was a bird. He wanted to be a dive bomber. It's a whole thing. I recorded it.

I'll send you a copy of it later because I actually capped it out. It's pretty good. I'd love to see that. Give me it. Before we get to the game, Tina and I have been working on the basement every weekend.

Came across a box that has about 20 to 25, 30 of these. Oh, I hope you're looking at the screen done away. Hold on. Hold on. I'll send you a camera. Here you go. You can use, you can see it in real time. There you go.

You can go. Go ahead, Brian. Okay. Atari games cartridges in boxes. Look at that. Like Yarra's Revenge. Holy moh. That's good looking.

Manual journey escape. Look at here's the funny thing. Yars Revenge actually even has the target sticker that I bought. Dude, that is. I bought the game for 2797 or somebody likely bought the game. That is meant in box. you need to put that in an exterior plastic box and put an outrageous price on it. That's awesome.

Are those, are they mint and box? They haven't been pulled out. Phoenix. No, they're, they've definitely been played. Phoenix from when Atari changed their logo, Othello, Cosmic Arc when Magic was making games for the 26th. The old was, magic was so good. All their games were great. If you people are listening and never seen an Atari 2600 game art box, dude, you need to go.

spend an afternoon of an imaginable adventure that's not in that cartridge. Yeah, one of my favorite gifts of all time came from Brian. He sent me Brian Abbott, one year for Christmas, sent me one of those Atari art compilation books. Oh, that's so good.

Yes, it probably included the artwork for this one right here, Star Raiders. Yeah, Star Raiders is awesome. That's what the box looks like. Here's what the actual game art looks like. Yeah, they were never right. They were always bad. They were always so... There's a couple large blocks. So poorly represented it on the outside and inside.

Just always... You couldn't sell what was inside the box Nintendo tried it. It worked for them, whatever. Yeah. Good point. Anyway. All right, well, let's get to this here. I've got to get some little plastic cases for those because I'm going to put those on eBay.

Hell yes. Oh, yeah. You should sell them. You should sell them. I don't want to store them, Brian. You should sell them. Before you put them in a plastic box, just let me know how much you're looking for them. Just just so that I hate...

You'd get a better price than eBay for. me of course i hate the idea of putting something in a there's so many already in plastic boxes that oh oh it just disgust me he hates it brian the little plastic box that protects the cardboard he wants to put he wants to have him play he wants to hook him up and capture him and play them and he's on and let people fondle them in their hands and go oh 100% rather you get these than um than me i just don't i'm not going to spend the money to find an rf something that changes RF, UHF

crap to HDI and all that and again, I don't want to store them so I'd rather sell them. I already have those things and I've just bought some strong storage boxes for when we travel to like the Southeast meetup this next time I've got some stuff that we'll be to bring with us and I'm hoping to make it out

to a Vegas event one day so all of our listeners can play around with this old crap, touch it and go, this was it, touch it there you go, yeah, all right, we'll talk it. You and I will talk offline and see what I'll send you a list of everything that's in here and we'll see what you want. Touching and you're touching Brian's Yards Revenge. I just saw my original 1978, 2,600 as well, but I'm not parting with that.

That I'm keeping because he's got plenty of those. Atari recently, they're selling machines you can put original carts in now. I know. They're just acime and everything. They're stupidly expensive. They're like three or 400 bucks. It's so nice. Let me, let me, let me, let me.

Oh, let me, let me, we'll talk. Okay, all right, we'll talk. He knows his shit about this stuff, unfortunately. Fair enough. He's an addict. These are basically cocaine things. I have problems. Yeah, he has problems. Brian, explain this, speaking of real games.

Games that are new, let's talk about it right now with this game. Who's going to win what? Talk about that. Welcome to the morning half-ass is a trivia game where I'm actually going to be giving the two of you the answers. I'm going to give Scott and Brian a category and six possible answers, three of which are correct and three that are incorrect, depending on how confident you feel the category, you can provide one, two, or three guesses. But if any of those guesses are wrong, you get zero points for that round.

One right gets you a point, two right gets you three points, three right gets you five points. We're going to add up all those points. And the player with the most, after three rounds, wins the prize for their contestant in absentia. Here are the people you're playing for. Scott, you're playing for Tate Zimba in Blaine. I don't know any of those words. I love every word you just said. Yes.

Zimba. Zimba. Brian, you're playing for Tom Mantec in Swayson City, California. Oh, my gosh. I love that name. Yeah, Sweson City. These are great names today. It's Swayson City.

Yeah, and we'll talk about the games after we play and tell you what people have won. Let's get to the first round. Question number one, title characters that survive their novels. So we've done title characters who survive their movies. Let's talk about the novels. Your choices are. Dr. Javago, Oliver Twist, Babbitt, Don Quixote, Emma, and Lolita.

I thought you were to do like Harry Potter and game, like, how much is going to do stuff like that, okay. Of course, yeah, no, that'd be too easy. These are classics, exactly. Which three of these survived the novels in which they are in? Let's see, I don't know how conservative to be here because I don't really know the answer to most of these. My favorite, my mom's favorite movie for, I swear, most of my childhood was Dr. Chavago.

It's all she talked about. Yeah, I know. That is a frequent mom's favorite movie, I think. Yeah, but I don't remember how it. She made us watch it and stuff, too, but I don't remember anything about it. I don't know. There's two good guesses. I'll just choose these guesses.

I don't freaking know, dude. Yeah, me either. Okay. Yep. I know some of these stories, but I'm like blanking on the ends of them. It just. Sure. Well, you both settled on Babbitt, like you both chose two each.

The one you guys agreed upon is Babbitt, and I have this backwards. Oops. And you both lose. Yeah, so hold on a second. How do I fix this? Hold on a second. I'm just realizing that the three that are supposed to be X's, three that are supposed to be check marks are X's.

Interesting. Let me give me one second. I think I can fix this really quickly. A brand new feature request from Al-Kabab as he's listening. Right, exactly. Al-Kabob, can you fix it so that if I'm dumb, I don't break the game? Yeah. Let's see here.

Probably got some way of doing it. Save. Let's see. Run and let's see what happens. Okay, re-select. So you had M. M. Abbott and Scott. Just choose who you had. Bolita and Babbitt, Brian.

So we're going to be honest here? All right, fine. I'm going to be honest, because I can see what you chose. Okay, you lock up. Shoot, you know, that wasn't so bad. Actually, it was pretty good. No, no. You guys both had Babbitt.

Babbitt is correct. Babbitt does survive their novel. I've, I cannot even think of the novel Babbitt, to be honest. All the other ones here, I totally recognize, but I don't know what bad is. I was like Dunaway. I was thinking of the bugs, or not Bugs Bunny, but the cartoon with the two guys. It felt right. It's actually, yeah.

Hey, Babbet. Yeah, Abbott. Yeah, Abbott. Yeah. Costello, he called them Babbitt, yeah. It was great. I used to love those. Like, if you were a contemporary of Abbott and Costello, that might have seemed silly because they were still popular in movies and junk.

But to see a cartoon version of it was probably like a little lame for us, though. That was amazing. I love that freaking cartoon. And that character looks so much like Stimpy for Renan Stimpy. I was like, man. Oh, yeah. That is, yeah. What a bean.

And let's see. Scott, you also chose Emma, the matchmaker, the matchmaker in her novel. And Brian, you chose Lolita from the book Lolita. I think she's famously died, too, but I recognize the name. I was like, Yuska. She, Lolita did die. Scott got it right. Emma is correct.

Yeah, Lolita dies in childbirth. Emma, you know, she does her little matchmaking thing. I don't think Mr. Dorsey's in that one. That's the same author, though. Don Quixote dies, killed by Windmill and Dr. Chivago, much to the lament of all of our moms, dies at the end of his book. The only two I knew, the only two I knew died for sure was Lolita and Childbirth and the Don Quixote one, but I couldn't remember what killed him. The rest of this was a total guess. Babbitt even.

I had no idea what that is. Yeah. I got lucky. Three points of luck. You absolutely got lucky, yeah. All right. um did i not get uh emma right monica's uh monica says yeah he hasn't read emma did i did she does emma die at the end of emma or maybe the rest of your description was bad makes matches i thought

is what she does she's like hooks people up it's what clueless would no you're thinking of you're thinking of will smiths hitch the novelization yeah yeah he also dies in into that book but emma has emma has got like one of those modern rewakes me remake it's got a winneth paltrow remake remake But then it's also got, I thought it was Clueless, was the, yeah, because Cher and Clueless was the Emma of her of the story. So it's correct then, because Emma didn't die. So you're correct, right? But maybe the rest of it, she's saying. Yes, yeah, she's just saying that I'm not, that I'm not correct about the thing.

I don't know what she's saying. All right. Well, I guess Brian's reading Emma now. Geez, guys. I'm not. Definitely not. Elizabeth Bovani question number two These are wives of Henry the 8th

You know, he had all these wives And some of them lost their heads and died And some of them just, you know, got divorced But which of these were actual wives of Henry the 8? Catherine of Aragon, Catherine DeBurr Catherine Gray, Catherine Parr, Catherine of Elwha, and Catherine Howard. So many Catharines.

So many Catharines. Which of these were actual? I wish he would have had eight wives. just to match the eighth thing that would have been great except they all died horribly or a lot of them did so maybe that's not good but um all right i should know this you've obviously left off some of the easy ones sure um so this is up to us to um you know how many wives do you have total i'll do these two i don't know how many total seven i believe yeah that must have sucked he died henry the eighth and he couldn't quite get an eighth wife i couldn't uh right all right

We'll give it a shot. All right. You guys are both locked in, and you've locked in on totally different ones. Oh, no, no pairings. Brian, you locked in on Catherine of Al-Wa and Catherine Gray. Catherine of Al-Wa is the queen consort to Henry V, was not a wife of Henry the 8th. The last one I was thinking. I got him confused.

Catherine Gray was the grandniece of Henry VIII. Scott, you locked in on Catherine DeBurr and Catherine. of Aragon, or Boar, maybe that's how it's pronounced, Catherine Boar. Catherine Abor was from, she was also from Jane Austen. Shit. Who did Emma.

Catherine of Aragon is the only correct one you guys got. Parr and Howard. Yeah, Parr and Howard were the two correct. See, I would have never thought par, I was thinking of like Jack Parr. It's too, new of a name. I know, it does say too modern sounding. Damn it.

Well, I'm not, I'm not spying on Henry H. Wives. Come on, man. I can't. You're not into it. You're not into that. You're not into looking at what other people's personal lives are all about. No. Look at you.

Why would you know any of these answers? All right. That's fine. Was it six wives or was it seven wives? I do like, thank you, Amy, for the reminder. Divorce beheaded died. Divorce beheaded survived is how you remember the six. Yeah.

Divorce beheaded died. Divorce beheaded survived. Six wives. Okay. All right. Let's get to question number three. You guys are walking into this one with zero points. But guess what?

It's a music question. I have faith in you. I think you guys are going to do great on this one. A lot of tiny text on this one. So I'm going to put my glasses on. Which of these are artists whose songs top the singles chart, the Billboard 100 singles chart, more than 20 years apart? Your choices are the Beach Boys, the Rolling Stones, Elvis Presley, Elton John, Stevie Wonder, and Diana Ross. Which of these artists had singles that.

top the charts more than 20 years apart. I'm picking two because I don't know my third one. Okay. And I don't even know if my two and not have to be right. Well, I could go, if he misses it, if he whips. You should go to a tiebreaker. That's true.

Well, if he whiffs, you could win with one. That's true. Oh, ooh, I'm taking the odds. Remember how these weird points work? Okay. Yeah, you're going to kill me here. You're both locked in. Let's look at Elton John.

You both selected Elton John. you locked in on Elton Between Crocodile Rock and Candle in the Wind to chart toppers was 24 years So that is more than 20 years

Very good Elton John is correct That second song is so I hate it so freaking much Which which version of Candle in the Wind Do you hate? I don't like any of them The one he re-did

For the death of What's her name? I don't like it either way I just think it's a Sappy I liked the Marilyn Monroe And I thought Damn dude you could have

written a brand new song for Princess Dahan. There was no reason to reuse it because you know, Tina's, one of Tina's favorite people in the underpass or what did she die in the tunnel? She died in the tunnel, yes. Underpass. Underpass. I mean, technically

there were roads that went over it, so it was technically underpass. Sure. Let's see. Scott, you also chose the Beach Boys. You probably can guess the second song, right? It was their last number one hit. Yeah, the one I really hate.

Yep. hold on how does it go uh oh it's not coming to me maybe that's a good thing because the mini oh the classical soundtrack i forgot about that sucks oh it sucks their first single was their first number one was i get around their last one was cocommo those songs were 24 years apart as well so beach boys that one beach boys is correct so scott you've got three points let's see how Brian did with his other choice, which was Elvis Presley. Okay. Now, Heartbreak Hotel was his first number one.

Right. I thought I would have gone with that as well because I thought I would go on with Elvis as well because I thought that a little less conversation was a number one. It never made it to number one on the U.S. on the Billboard charts. So his last number one was suspicious lines. Because I'm going to win, I think. you are scott suspicious minds and those were sadly only 13 years apart congratulations scott the other one was stevie wonder whose songs were um fingertips part two when he was like 14 years old or 13 years old he had his first number one and his last number one i would have thought it was i just called to say i love you but uh a little bit later than that he had part time lover which was an even worse song.

Yeah. Man, you don't get health insurance or anything. But they're all better than that Beach Boys song. All of these songs were way better than that Beach Boys song. They're all better than that Beach Boys song. Even the L.A. Ross was pretty close. Endless Love and

Where Did Our Love Go were the two songs for her with the Supremes? Where Did Our Love Go? 17 years apart and the Rolling Stones' satisfaction. Their last number one, according to my searching, because I had to reconfirm if anything came out since this question. was written, 13 years between satisfaction and their song, I Miss You, or just called Miss

You. When Stevie Wonder started his career, was he a lifelong blind person or did that happen later in his life? Do we know that? He was lifelong, yeah, he was blind as a kid. Okay. I don't know if he was, I don't know if he lost his sight while he was a kid, but he definitely was blind when fingertips came out.

Gotcha. I like some guy, I like a good Stevie Wonder playlist. I enjoy it. Dude, me too. As long as you stop before. I just called a say I love you. Everything before that is fantastic. Yeah, that song.

Sir Duke and I believe and, oh my God, he's just so many, so many great songs. I like the, what are the two Diana Ross songs again? Where did our love go and endless love? I love that it's endless love, which implies it'll never go away. And then later, you got to ask where it went. That's great. Where'd how they go? It was the other way around.

Where did I love go was the first one, and then endless love after that. Oh, they found it then. Oh, fantastic. She found it. She found it. It was endless. Yeah, finally a happy ending to the Diana Ross story.

Where did our endless love go? Well, there you go. We got a winner, Brian. Who won and what'd they win? Because you were playing for Tate Zimba in Blaine. They're going to win a copy of Hello, Good Boy, and Theria. Big thanks to Norm in our team who sent those games in. Congratulations.

Brian, your friend Tom Mantic in Swayson City, California, is not going to go away empty-handed, they're going to get a copy of Dust Fleet. So everybody gets something. Somebody, everybody, and all people win today. Congratulations. The first guy, the winner, sounds fake like he's a Game of Thrones character from some far-flung country. Or a George Lucas name or something. Yeah, a really odd name, but I love it. I wish I had an odder name. Mine's too normal. Anyway, congratulations to both of you. You get one of these from Scott Fletcher. Congratulations. Since he's not coming to Vegas, I'll play it twice. Congratulations.

We know we're going to miss him terribly. So much, yeah. You have no idea how much we're going to miss him. But he's got, you know, family commitments, and I get that. That's what you have. Brian Dunaway, this weekend, we'll talk again Wednesday. But this weekend, you and I getting together, play retro. What are we covering?

We're playing that crock game from the PlayStation or the Saturn. It was a 3D platformer that may or may not have inspired that Mario guy to do a 3D thing. Yeah, might have. I mean, there are rumors. There are rumors that perhaps Nintendo. We're going to dig deep. Or is it a crock of shit? Get it?

Crock. Oh, let's find out, Crock. Yeah, let's find out when we all get together and do this on Friday. But before that, we'll have Brian Wednesday. We'll do another little competition. Always fun to have him on Brian Dunaway Kiss. Our butts. See you later.

Bye. All right. We did it. We did. Guys, we have time for one news story. So here it is. Today's news. is brought to you by.

Is there still time to get tickets to TMS Vegas? There is, it turns out. Grab them today at TMS.orgas. Nice. They're still there. Yeah. Especially if you're coming solo. Come, join us.

Yep. You got to hurry up so I can figure out what the swag-only people are getting. So hurry up, hurry up. Shelter worker scoured a bin of dog vomit for human toes to sell for $400 on the black market. apparently human toes are worth a lot of money. My God, there's so much going on in this headline. A lot to unpack here.

It's like a Christmas present in March. So this dog ate toes, and then they've got to dig through the vomit to find the toes to sell them on the black market. Basically, yes. Basically, so here's the reason for it. The Melbourne mother who put dead men's toes in jars to sell them on the black market had a treasure trove of other oddities in her house. So somebody's got a lot of weird stuff. Oh, okay. Like, you know, what was that show?

The toes were already severed when they... There was like a discovery show or some channel that had... All they did was tour around of these weird shops that had, like, severed fingers and shrunken heads and... Right, a squirrel fetus in a jar. There's a place over by us that has that. It's like the golden oddities shop, and it is really bizarre and cool in there. I like those places. I realize that there's a lot of macabre going on, but there's something about...

them that's intriguing to me. A lot of freeze-dried bugs, giant bugs on display panels and things and jars. Big old freaking beetle like a... No, no. I don't want anything, I don't want anything that crunches like that if you accidentally set a book on top of it. I don't know why, but like Carter thinks the idea of having a rhino beetle as a pet is like a great idea. I can't think of, I can't, I'd rather have a spider. Exactly. Big old carapace with all the black shell on it and goo inside. Gross.

Anyway, Lilydale woman Joanna Catherine Kinman, age 48, appeared in Ringwood Magistrates Court on Monday. Man, you guys have some cool Australian court places. Pled guilty to a single charge of offensive conduct involving human remains. The court hurt Kimman worked as a ranger at an animal shelter where her job involved after hours collection of stray and seized animals. leading senior constable Melissa Sam Brooks said on Friday the 19th last year. Two dogs that had been partially consumed or had partially consumed the toes after the owner died from natural causes. So this is a guy died in his chair, dogs got hungry, ate his feet. The story we, you know, a story is the oldest time.

Right. Exactly. What happened then is at the facility where she worked, the dogs became ill on the toes and ralphed them up. then they had to go clean so she went digging through the remains of that found the toes and tried to sell them and then got busted god what do you have to put on the black market description now like obviously they were used before yeah uh gently used and gently vomited uh yeah what's your what's your freaking black eBay listing for this or what are you and actually where is this black market like I always wonder about that. Yeah, I know, exactly. Where do you, how do you find me? You guess you can't find, you have to be on the dark web to find the black market, I guess. Because in the old days, it was like, you knew a guy, knew a guy, and you'd meet in dark alleys, and it was that kind of thing. And now I assume it's all online, some kind of dark web, whatever the dark web even is anymore. Everyone acts like it's some very specific place that you go through a door that says, if you come through here, it's just a dark web, you better turn, it doesn't happen. I'll abandon hope, I'll abandon hope all you enter. Uh, well, you click this link. Yeah, sounds like Hocum to me. Yeah. That's it for the news.

We're going to take a break. When we come back, Bobby will be here, and he's going to defend a position that he made out loud in the chat room last week. Okay. All right, good. When we made the comment, it wasn't even us locking in on it. It was me talking about a guy who said time doesn't exist. Somebody sent in a thing. Yeah, exactly.

And I think it was a TikTok video or something. And he is going to come and prove to us that time does indeed exist. All right. No manby-pambi dancing around the bush on this one. He's ready to defend science, you know? It's about time. That's what I say. It is literally about time.

It's about time. We talked about time. We'll be back, though, after the song, because that's what we got to do now. Let's play one of those songs. Yeah, this is a solo release. So if you're familiar with the band Friendship Commanders, we have a solo release from Buick Audra of the band. She's got a brand new album called Adult Child. This one doesn't come out until June 13th, so plenty of time between now and when the album comes out.

But this is the new single from the album. There's a video that goes along with it called Questions for the Gods of Human Behavior. Wow. Love that. She's the vocalist and guitarist for the band, Friendship Commanders, the heavy rock band. But she's being joined on this album by an A-list of Nashville players so that she can kind of show off the more delicate side of her voice, which is really cool. Here is Buick Audra and questions for the gods of human behavior. Back then the rule of thumb was to rip yourself wide open and bleed shape.

That was how we meet friends. Oh, I'm not repeating these things that I didn't want to leave me. Am I back in my life? Is this the way you have? I can just pass, repeat, can slow it down, slow it down. I remember it clearly. I think I lost my silver away. Back then the word was love for every fucking feeling

in this world and what a must be all made Oh, I'm not repeating these things And I didn't want to do me Am I making my life hard Is that's the way it happens I can just press repeat And slow it down

Slow me down I'm the child of illusion I'm the earth to lie It's the way that it tells me That I better not try If it gave up the illusion It's a widely spread life And it's where it tells me

Could I let it not try But I'm repeating these things I didn't want to me And I'm making my life hard This is the way it happens I can just pass repeat Can I? Slow me down

Slow me down Slow it down Slow it down How can I? Slow it down Slow it down Slow it down Slow me down

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Sure. That's the brand new song from Buick Audra from Friendship Commanders. A brand new song is called Questions for the Gods of Human Behavior. Nice. I was supposed to read this earlier, and I forgot. I think you got one of these two. It says you did. Let's see.

Did you get a happy trails thing from a listener? Yes. I've even got the sticker on my water box. bottle right there. I'm going to read this because... Thank you for finally remember to bring that down. Mine is still sitting on the counter upstairs. I know.

I've been forgetting for probably more than a week. So I finally remembered it. I'm going to read this real quick. Hi, Slobber and Burp. My name is Brent. And I've been getting free content from you guys ever since I owned a Zoom in the ELR days. Now I would like to give a little free entertainment back in return.

He goes on to say, I'm not asking for a shout at our promotion. Tough poopie. We're giving you one. All right, when you guys do cool stuff, we will promote it because it's cool and you're part of the community. We don't care if you don't want it or not, but I'm doing it. He says, my wife, Mel and I have a very small YouTube channel called Boundless Wander, where we go out and try to promote outdoor activities like hiking, camping, and canoeing. This year we attempted to hike the Appalachian Trail. We will be vlogging the entire experience.

If you guys are interested in watching or know anyone who would want to be watching, a couple of goofballs trying not to fall off mountains, that would be awesome. Thanks for all the content guys. you have made many drives across Texas seem a little shorter. Or as they say in Mexico, Tejas. I love that about Texas. That's right. Happy trails, y'all. Test the ship's phasers, says Brent and Mel.

So you're going to want to go to Boundless Wanderer, W-A-N-D-E-R on YouTube and check it out. I'm going to go to their channel today and watch the whole thing. And he sent us these really nice little cards. It'll send you to the thing. The cards are really cool. The stickers are super cool and sparrically. here I'll give the everybody at home watching video go ahead and scan that QR code and you're off to the races and then a little cool sticker like Brian said it's on his bottle already I need to put it on mine

just the nicest thing to get in the mail so thanks you guys that was really cool and I'm stoked for your channel it's great I wish I was a little more adventurous in that regard but I'm not okay let's get Bobby in he's coming in yeah he's coming in hot and not just because a bunch of people on YouTube think he's the best looking one here but They do. We get this a lot. Bob, everyone thinks Bobby's a hubba, hubba. I think he's the best look into the three of us, so I can't argue with that. Oh, absolutely.

Like, there's no question. I can't defend that. No. Not at all. Science. Bob is hungry, and the soup looks good. Well, good, because Bobby's here to show us that soup in its entirety. Bobby Frankenberger, welcome back to the show.

How are you? I'm doing well. I'm a little under the weather, but I'm doing it. I'm sorry to hear that. I hope that's a good. Well, good. Get it all out of your system before April 26. That's right. I'm exposing myself to every virus and bacteria so I can I can gain all the immunity I need to be in Vegas. I like that. That's how science works.

Yeah. Take it from me, science, Bobby. Yeah. But that's what growing up with kids are at school all days like, you know? It's just the way it is. They came home. Well, that's what I think it is. Well, what happened, there is this, we, you know, being good neighbors, we have a Zoe goes to school. school with a neighbor kid that we know and so I'm already there and I pick up that kid from bring them home too right yeah yeah um and uh it was like Wednesday maybe Tuesday I don't know it doesn't matter one day he gets in the car and he's like hacking up a lung after school and to coffin in the van and all over the place and I'm like oh boy yeah and then uh and then

one of my daughters the next day was a little bit sick then the other one the next day got a little bit sick, and then I got a little bit sick. Oh, man, I'm sorry that went around, but I'm glad it happened now and not the day before you leave for Vegas. And whatever we catch there, it stays there, so we're good. That's all right. That's what the marketing says. Yeah, that's what they want us to believe.

So let's believe. Whatever you contract here stays here. That's right. That's what they changed it to during COVID. Oh, I see. Well, Bobby is here, of course, from his science layer. He does a science podcast go all around science. I know he's got a couple of really cool things brewing here soon, too.

You guys got to be listening to that show. It's fantastic stuff. Last week, I believe it was, I brought up that dude I saw on TikTok who claimed in front of an audience, mind you, and in front of some, I don't know, some school science, something weak at a college somewhere. I don't know the details. But he basically said, time doesn't exist. And the guy questioned him further. He says, what do you mean? He says, the only thing you ever experience is the very moment you're in, right?

this very micron of a second you don't really there is really no past and no future you're just where you are and you're moving forward in a in a thing that you can call it time if you want that you don't really exist anywhere but that moment even if you're looking back on a memory or looking at a history book that's you reading about a thing that happened during somebody else's moment or perhaps even your own moment but that was the only moment that mattered and now you're in a new moment and that's time and there is no past or future. So that was the essence of it. And in the chat room, I remember you immediately took a little bit of an issue and I thought, well, this would be good because he'll come back with something. And sure enough, I think what I said

in the chat room was this scientist, and I think I used quotes, this scientist is 100% wrong. Yeah. Yeah, it seemed like a pretty, you declared, you made a declarative and now you have to defend your thesis or your right or your not even your thesis what are we going to call this this is your phd candidacy today right yeah well let me start by saying i'm off i'm often much more much more uh saucy in the in the chat than i am in real life so i'm probably not going to be as angry as you might expect me to be because um because a lot of people say that because they're trying to make a philosophical point or an ethical point about how to live your life and whatever that's fine you can sure sure but uh but it seemed to

to me that this person was was the way you described it anyway having not seen the tick talk myself the way you described it was that this person being a scientist was trying to lean on on that weight right like that heft and so to to try to make some sort of more declarative statement and and that's where I get annoyed because you know that's not true there are there are a couple of reasons why we can say that time is an actual so time for sure is a physical property of the universe and saying that time is made up by people it would be kind of like saying

that length or width is made up and then trying to point to the fact that well you know man invented rulers and inches and centimeters so it's not real but it is real like we we can observe the physical property of length it just yes we made up

tools and units to quantify that property of the universe but and so time is the same way like yes seconds and hours and minutes whatever some of this might be more impressed with the length we're observing than others is all I'm saying I'm just saying

but no you make a good point this is the same philosophical take of like the water water isn't really wet we just call it that because we don't know what else to call it or whatever exactly it's because we're right identifying a feeling with a word, but it could be any word and it could be any feeling. Sure, sure, right, right.

So, one of the, first of all, if you say that time doesn't exist, you're ignoring, you're ignoring entropy, which is this, it's thermodynamics, right? So the, I think it's the second law of thermodynamics. I've actually, because I've been sick, didn't prepare as many notes as I probably could have, so I'm going to be winging it a little bit here. But the second law of thermodynamics, I think, basically says that as time, time as as as a as a what do you call it as a as a as a system the energy or the amount of order in a system will always decrease and it can you can never regain that order again it actually says

it about energy that the amount of energy always stays the same in a system and that the energy required the energy put into a system is the same you're not going to get more or less you can't increase or decrease the amount of energy in a system. So in order for something with order, like a stack of blocks has lots of entropy, or it's the other way around, the stack of blocks has less entropy because it's more ordered. Whenever you knock those blocks down,

it has more entropy. And then on a grand scale, the universe will always increase its entropy. It will always increase its amount of disorder, and you can never regain that order again. because of just it's just a prop it's just the way the universe works it will always be that way and so that's why you talk about how eventually will the universal experience a heat death right like eventually all the energy in the universe will get spread out evenly because that's what

it's trying to do is it's just spreading out evenly and eventually it'll all be spread out and and everything we will we will long humans will definitely not be around to experience that yeah it's not like we're there till the last second like it's not going to work that way like we're going to like a thought let's say let's just for fun say a thousand years from now are our our uh our progeny continues on multiple generations and one day on a saturday afternoon at 3 p.m. Wow it's getting it's pretty hot all the so you feel that blah and we're dead. Right right right. This must be that heat death we've heard of so much of ours. That ain't going to happen that way. So, all right. Continue on. So far you convinced me. But let's see what else are you going to. what that means is that

that property actually kind of stamps into the laws of the universe cause and effect. It means that things that happen now will always happen before the things that happen next. Cause always must precede an effect, right? And time

is inexorably part of that, right? Yeah, because it means that the arrow of causality always points in one direction and that implies time. Now that whole entribalably description is a little bit kind of weird and hard to wrap your brain

around but there's I think a more concrete way to think about how time is a physical property of the universe and it's based on well Einstein came up with this concept

you know always goes back to Einstein right very all roads lead back to Einstein yeah so Einstein was thinking about the speed of light and he was thinking about how the speed of light is always constant.

When scientists kind of figured that out, it was just one of those things that was really hard for scientists to get their brain around because there were just so many weird problems with it, right? Like, how can the speed of light always be constant no matter how you're looking at it? And Einstein

spent a lot of time thinking about this and trying to figure out how this was possible because it had been shown that it's true that it doesn't matter from what frame of reference you're looking at light. It will always be moving. From your perspective, it will always be moving at, you know, around 300,000 kilometers per second. Right, right.

And so, yeah, so his thought experiment that he came up, which is now famous, was this idea of, like, imagine two trains that are sitting next to each other. They're like, and just for the sake of talking about the numbers, Let's imagine these two train tracks are three meters apart, okay? The numbers aren't super important unless you're doing the math, but it'll make it easy for me to use accurate numbers in a second. If I say they're three meters apart.

Now, let's say you're just standing on those trains, and the trains aren't moving. And you have one person standing on one train and one person standing on the other train, and you're throwing a ball back and forth to each other. Okay? And let's say it just takes one second for when I throw the ball for you to catch it's So we know that we're throwing the ball back and forth to each other at three meters per second because it takes one second for it to go from me to you, right? Right.

Now, that's fine. That's easy. We understand how fast the ball's going. Three meters per second. Now, imagine that the train is moving instead. Both of the trains are moving. So we're still parallel to each other. We're still looking right at each other.

And we can still throw the ball back and forth to each other. And it still takes one second to go back. and forth to each other, but our trains are moving. Yeah. Let's say the trains, for the sake of this example, let's say the trains are moving at about four meters per second forward. All right. That's about 10 miles per hour.

So not very fast. Still easy for us to throw the ball back and forth. Now, from our perspective, again, that ball is going back and forth between us at three meters per second. The train is moving forward at four meters per second. But if somebody were on the ground or maybe hovering above the train just, in the air, looking down, they would actually see that the ball is not going

back and forth between the trains in a straight line. From their perspective, it's moving in a diagonal line. Right, right. It's going to where the person's going to be as opposed to where they are as you throw the ball. Right. Well, also, not just that, but because when I let go of the ball, the train is moving.

Right. Yeah, so the ball was moving already when I threw it. Right. It's also, well, the earth's moving too, so it's it was already moving then too, right? We got three Levels of moving, sure. But we'll just stick to the surface of the Earth and not include the Earth moving through space yet. Okay.

But so from that outside observer's perspective, that ball is not moving three meters per second. It actually moved five meters across the diagonal. And that's why I chose three and four, because the math works out. Hypotenuse of it. Yeah, exactly. Three squared plus four squared. Yeah, exactly. yeah um so so it moved five meters so from that person's perspective they observed the ball actually moving

so how do we explain that that in in the same one second it went it went a further distance well we understand that because the ball from the outside observer's perspective not on the trains they are observing the ball move five meters per second actually so it's and it all makes sense because the the train is actually giving velocity and energy to the ball and all that kind of stuff right So Einstein thought of all this And he's like, but this wouldn't Instead of using a ball, let's think of a photon of light. It wouldn't work

that way with a photon of light because if I throw a photon, if I shoot a photon of light from a flashlight at you, Scott, on the other train, from our perspective, the light goes from me to you at the speed of light. But we know that the speed of light is constant from

every frame of reference. So even that outside observer would see that beam of that photon ton of light move along that five meter diagonal still and it would still be going at the speed of light the same speed that we observed it at

so Einstein thought how is this possible right like this can't how is this possible because it's going further in the same amount of time but the speed of light's supposed to be constant that's why his hair is such a mess he just had no time to take care of the personal hygiene

he just was like damn it this is a real problem wringing his hair constantly trying to and so he said well the only way to resolve this is if we if is if time itself is actually moving slower for the people on the train all right um that means their clocks would be ticking each second on their clock would tick at a slightly slower rate than the clock of the person sitting on the ground covering above or yeah right there was the only way that it could work out. And so that seems crazy, right?

But guess what? It's 100% true and we've proven it experimentally. All right. This is actually what happens. In fact, GPS satellite technology would not work if this didn't, if this was not true. This has to be true for our GPS satellites to work because we account for it. So just giving you, well, the first time that one of the first times that they actually experimented, it was hard, it's hard to prove this experimentally, right? because you have to be able to

with man the distances that we are able to deal with light travels so fast how can you accurately you can't right you'd need some way to see the photon the beam of light and measure the speed it's going yeah to be able to really to be able to witness it

right because if we're talking about the distances and the speeds that we are able to achieve as human beings that would affect time so minutely that it would be nearly impossible to measure the difference. But then atomic clocks were invented which can measure time down

to incredibly small amounts. The atomic level in fact. Yes, exactly. Because they use the vibration of atoms in order to detect or maybe it's the decay of atoms or something like that. I don't remember exactly how atomic clocks work.

But they do allow you to measure time into like I don't know, something crazy like billionths of a second or smaller than that even so what they did what scientists did they were like oh great we can finally test this what they did was they took

three atomic clocks they put one on the ground like one on the surface of the earth and then they put one on one each on two different jet liners and they had one of these airplanes these jet liners

fly with the rotation of the earth flying east and they had one of them flying west against the rotation of the earth and they had these clocks synchronized and then they when after the flight was over and everything they got down and they checked the clocks to see if they were still in sync oh that's cool that is cool yeah and they found out that literally the one that was flying east with the earth's rotation

that clock had ticked faster its time was ahead and the one that went west was moving slower relative to space because it was moving against Earth's rotation it had slowed down it was behind the clock on Earth and that was one of the first experimental

verifications that this actually happens this is kind of like what Doc Brown sends Einstein into the future after synchronizing the watches and then puts them side by side and says see there this one's now one minute ahead yeah right and so yeah and so yeah and so

because that's the reason that happens is because the faster you're moving the slower your clock ticks and relative to a stationary observer and like I said GPS satellites wouldn't work if this wasn't the case because gravity is involved too by the way so the

the the stronger you're feeling gravity the slower your clock will tick also so that means the converse is true so if you go above the earth if you get high up

then your then your clock will start to tick faster the farther away you are from a you know a gravitational like a gravitational field so anyway because of that and because the GPS satellite itself is moving so fast going around the earth

it we have to literally in the math for how we calculate time because that's how in order to do GPS you have to figure out how it moved from here to here and it took this long to move that far so where is it

you know that's how you determine velocity and position and stuff like that so they have to in the math they have a time dilation correction that they have to factor in based on how fast the satellite is moving and how far

above the earth it is so does that mean the two asteroids astronauts that were stuck on the ISS for such a long time, 93 days or what? No, it was like nine months. Are they like fractions of a second younger than they would be? Yes, absolutely. That 100% that is, that is the case. Yes. That's so wild. Yeah, it is wild. Yeah. It's so small that you're not going to actually experience the difference, right? But technically, yes, time has moved slower for them. they have aged slightly less than relative to us here on Earth.

Any astronaut who's gone into space has experienced that. How accurately does, I know fiction messes with these concepts all the time and just tries to take him to different extents, but Interstellar tried to adhere to that bit pretty early in the movie. Later on, there's some stuff that's very, you know. Yeah, the concepts in the movie were accurate. Yeah, if you were, if you're getting closer and closer and closer to a black hole, then yeah your time

your time will move more slowly compared to people around you now you can't travel travel through time and then come back right like time still only moves in one direction so let's say you were able to travel at half the speed of light or even

close to the speed of light for some like a few years and then time passes really fast for us on earth but for you it's only been like you know a year and then you come back more to what'll happen is it's not like coming back

you'll get that back it'll take you another year to get back in that same amount of time that passed for it so we could be long dead but it's only been two years for the person who is traveling near the speed of light you know wild all right well I think you've officially

you know debunk that guy's thinking and he may have basically been trying to make the point of you know it would have been better framed if he said here's why time travel will never work or something like that where you could say you're always here and it's this constant and you know you could talk to all the way you talked about it and said all you have right now the only time you're really ever going to experience is the one you're in this very second enjoy it while you have it like that there's some value in that conversation but this guy there is yeah philosophically i agree with that

idea yeah sure but i think he was more at least it came off to me like he was pushing the idea that we don't know you know we don't really know what time is we've made it up and it was it was a little much so you know there are some weird things about time that happen as a result of this and scientists haven't been able to explain yet which is like if you take these equations to their natural conclusion so so the

the faster you go the slower time gets right that's actually why this whole idea that space and time are the same thing called space time that's what Einstein called it the fact that this the fact that they are the same thing and that

the equations that led to that also tell us that give us the explanation for why you hear that the speed of light is the like the speed limit of the universe right nothing can go faster than light in fact nothing can actually

nothing with mass can even go the speed of light only a massless object could go the speed of light so a galactic level Sammy Hagar would say I can't drive the speed of light is what he would say yeah yes okay because that would be the current limit they were aware of But like in that song, it doesn't really work today because now all the highways like between states and stuff, it's like 80.

So are you telling me there's a time where we're going to go, oh, the speed of light, that used to be the hot one. But now it's the speed of smell or something, although we already know what they're. Well, you know, there's like wormholes and stuff that people think would make us traverse long distances in an instant and whatnot. But that's all theoretical, right? But this idea that the speed of light is this universal speed limit The reason that that is Is because the faster you go

The slower your time gets Until eventually if you were to achieve the speed of light You would not experience time anymore And because time would stop moving And in fact And in fact This is a wild thing to think about Photons of light

Because they're massless If it were possible If photons were conscious then they would they would not experience time at all. The moment of emission of a photon of light is equivalent to its absorption.

It happens in the same instant. Oh yeah. I love that stuff. It's like the minute the light turned on somewhere you, it hit you at the exact moment. It's the point. The quantum computing stuff's all wrapped up in that, right? There's something there with all that. Yeah, there's a lot of things we don't understand about how that were. Like imagine when the sun emits a photon of light, we experience, like, from our perspective, it takes eight minutes to get to us.

Or when you look at the cosmic microwave background radiation, it takes what, like 13, 14 billion years that light has been traveling to get to our detectors, to our telescopes. But from the perspective of that photon, no time has passed. Nothing. Okay. That's great. It was instantaneously born and hit smacked into our telescope. That's such a crazy, crazy sense of difference between almost everything else that we have measures of, right? Yeah.

Everything else, like sound, which whatever, sounds its own bag of chips because when you talk about vacuum versus atmospheric sound, like it's all, you know, it changes. But we know we can measure that. And it's so infinitesimally slower than light. Like so slow. It's not even on the same spectrum. We kind of think of it that way because we're all, we're vision, we're primarily vision and auditory creatures.

You know, big, big senses going on there. But the idea that it's just like, blip, it happened there, and you got it here, and it didn't matter that it was 400 billion trillion light years away or whatever. It was just like, and you were done. And you mentioned quantum physics.

Yeah. um this idea of time being it's a big open question in quantum mechanics so because it kind of breaks down when you get down to that level everything at the on the quantum level is all kind of quantized right that's what quantum is it's like distinct packets of of space and length you've got like the plonk length and stuff like that that you know there's when if you zoomed in far enough the idea is that there's that there's there's a you and you divide space and and matter up into into smaller and smaller pieces there's eventually a size that you would get to that you couldn't get any smaller and the math shows us out some people say quantified is that what they mean well when you're quantifying you're you're counting it right and in order to count something you have to be able to put it into distinct packets to count it right okay and that's that's different yeah yeah exactly and so that idea is different than things moving smoothly

and there being an infinite number of ways to divide it up that would be how smooth and time according to Einstein time had smooth motion right like it flowed smoothly but we haven't like physicists haven't been able to figure out like is that is that also what happens to time at the quantum level is there a

is there a tiny quantized amount of time or not or does it And if it does, then what is it? And if it doesn't, then why? How do we explain that time still moves smoothly while everything else is quite? It's like, these are the big questions that they're trying to figure out right now. Yeah, and they're fun. I like them.

Yeah. Make your brain go. It's really interesting. You know, I mean, we can go back to playing World Warcraft later today and be all dumb and everything. But right now, we are just like, whoa, look at the knowledge. Our lines are expanded. That's right. And they're expanding at a rate of less than the speed of life.

That's right, which is quantifiable. You know? That's right. Exactly. Well, Bobby, always fun stuff. I'd love talking about this kind of stuff. And we get to do it every other week right here on the show with Bobby. Bobby, tell people about your show and anything else you got going on.

You'd like to mention. Well, my podcast, the science podcast I do is all around science. Me and my co-host, Morrow, we talk about science every week. And the episode comes out on Mondays, on today's. And this week, we talked about lab-grown meat. Oh, I love it. Excellent. Big fan.

I'm waiting for this. Yeah. Yeah. Bring it. I want to be able to walk into a place and they say. Joey Pence is going to say, I know that this steak was grown in a lab to taste like a perfectly delicious. I just want to walk in there and go, what do you want? And I'll say a rack of ribs.

And then they'll say that's a 20 minute process. And then a machine will schmoup out some perfectly good ribs. Oh, man. Yeah, exactly. I'm looking forward to this. But yeah, we talked about how does meat, how is it grown in a lab? And we talk about the question of, because a lot of people want to say, we need to grow meat because it would be more environmentally friendly. And we kind of like to dive into that a little bit.

And is it really or is it more complicated? Like electric cars. It's that electric car thing, right? Like it seems like, oh, we're talking about no emissions. So electric cars are going to be way better for the environment. Then you realize, way, wait, to power those batteries. Yeah, the electricity you got to power it with, the batteries and how you originate those. How you replace those, how you recycle any of that.

All of that is so much more complicated than just, I'm not pooping out air that's bad. Yeah, and the environmental impacts are a big open question. So I'll entice some of you anti-corporation people that are out there. One of the reasons we can't easily answer whether it will be better for the environment is because all the corporations, they have proprietary control over the processes for making lab-grown meat. and they're not telling any of us how they do it. Yeah. Regulations required, probably. And before we let you go, Bobby, let's promote the crap out of, this is going to be great.

You're going to be doing a live show with your co-host with Mora in Vegas, which is a brand new thing this year. So we'll talk about that for a second. Yeah, over time, over the past couple of years, past two years, it started with Tom doing a live podcast of DTNS. in Vegas two years ago and then last year TV's Travis jumped on and kind of shared that time with him and then I got a hold of Tom this year and said hey let's I would like to do that too and if Travis is doing it can we figure out a way to to get all three of us in there and so we are um so cool and uh we've got like a hole on the Monday before the first big event the first big official event we have like a whole all that morning starting at a 1030 is when mora and I are

going to be officially starting it. We're setting up at 10. So if you show up early, that's welcome and encouraged. Get a good seat. Yeah, get a seat right. Yeah, we're hoping for all of you going to be at TMAs Vegas. We're hoping, not hoping, we are going to do like a live audience participation sort of like demo of something. So we're going to, we want to get people involved in the show, but we're going to start officially at 1030, start setting up at 10. And then, yeah, it's going to be DTNS after us sometime around noon. And then the times are on TMS.Vegas. look there and you'll see it. Nice stuff.

I'm excited, man. Super stoked. And by the way, for a sick guy, you sure knew your shit today. You know, I think. I'm kidding. I think you did just fine. That's what I'm thinking. Those quantum particles hit me right in the face.

Bobby, have a fantastic week. Hope you feel better soon. And looking forward to, we'll have you at least one more time before the show down there. Yeah, I think so. On the calendar, we're... Well, we have you next week because Stephen's out. Oh, we haven't talked about that yet. yeah hey bob you want to sit in for step in for stephen next week well

yeah all right awesome we're gonna we'll have you however we can get you yeah bandaid pulled off that's right Stephen's doing some kind of giant school thing so we got a cover for him but anyway fantastic work we'll see you soon all righty don't go breathe on anybody is all I'm saying you know yeah get some rest you and Hammond man Hammond's sick also so don't know what's going around but glad you guys are all getting rid of it before Vegas. Yeah, get it in, get it out. If I'm trapped in a bar

car on the high roller with you all, whatever you have, I'm going to have. And I want that just to be a gin and tonic. Thank you very much. Yeah, we don't need to be sharing each other's. Although, you know what I've always found? Right around, we picked the perfect time of year for this event because, for whatever reason, all

those numbers go down that time of year. April's a wonderful time for everything to kind of go, brer. Yeah. And I don't know that we've ever had any, like, severe illnesses from Vegas except the year. Ducey got COVID on our year back after the two-year COVID hiatus. And he was breathing and barking all over me. And I didn't get it. No one else at that table got it. Like we were all just, we all did real good. I don't know what. So for whatever reason, it's a perfect time of year. It's good clean air. It's spring. There's something about all

those, you know, winter viruses kind of take a nap. And it's a good time to be there. So buy your tickets. That's right. And TV's Travis is right. The alcohol sterilizes us. So like, alcohol kills bacteria. So drink all the alcohol in Vegas. That'll at least kill some of the bacteria floating around. Yeah, it turns out there's tons of it there, plenty of it. Yeah. So you're never going to run out.

Both things, plenty of it. Yeah. That's going to do it for today. Real quick text, though, from an anonymous texter. This is about a comment I met about an old friend named Katie who could stand and pee. Oh, right, right. Yes, the woman who could write her name in the snow. Yeah.

She was, she was, I guess she's a woman now. What were we, though, about 50? Girl, you'll be a woman soon. She was probably, I don't know, she's probably 14, 15 when I knew her. But anyway, he says this, your friend Katie probably held her finger over the hole like you hold your finger at the end of a hose without a nozzle to aim the stream. I have a penis, so I'm probably wrong. I mean, I think you're, I don't know if you're right or if you're wrong, but I just love the way this text is written. and I love that it's anonymous.

So thank you for that. That's right. Just sign up for Katie's only fans and she'll explain it to you for $9.95 a month. Really great. Anyway, if I was still in contact with her, I would absolutely share this story. Anyway, if you want to send in your text,

your voicemails, any of that kind of stuff, this anything we love is working out great. Voicecast.com.com. It's all linked on the site as well. So use that at your leisure and send us more of your messages, both written and voicemails. We have a few backed up, but don't worry, they'll get played, and so will any new ones you send in.

If they're really long, sometimes they get put at the end of the show, because they're just too long for the show. So you people with your three-minute conversations, it's not a problem that you're doing them. Just know that you're probably going to hear them at the end instead of in the middle. Monday show today coming up at noon, so check that out. Me and Carter are doing it live at frogpans.tv, noon mountain time. So come on back for that. I think that's it. Brian, you got anything else before we go?

I got nothing else. go listen to first episode of daily music headlines as soon as we're done here and then you'll have time because it's five minutes long you can listen to it like

12 times before the Monday show that's how much you could listen to it yeah you'll be so knowledgeable about today's you'll have those headlines memorized yeah go for it all right well let's play a song and get the F out what do we got Shelley wrote in and said

happy 40th to my big brother Daniel. Like River Tam, I didn't get you anything, but I figured this would be a good way to thank you for introducing me to everything that makes my life happy, from Firefly to Wow to TMS, and so much more. I have a good feeling about this next decade, and if I'm wrong, it'll be nothing, a box of cookie dough bites and an absolutely terrible movie can't fix. I love you, sign Shelley. Oh, that's adorable. I'm going to play this. Happy birthday. Happy birthday. Nice. She requested for this date, but his birth, is actually April 5th, but just wants

to get it ahead of the game so that she has time to set this up and play the whole thing for him, which is really cool. She requested a song by They Might Be Giants or cover of a song by They Might Be Giants. This is fun. Listen, before

there was a Richard Cheese, there was a dude named Frank Bennett, who basically, from the name, combines like Frank Sinatra, Tony Bennett-style crooning with modern songs. And he does a bunch of great stuff. Look him up. He sounds a lot like Frank Sinatra, which really adds to the fun of it. This was from his 1998 album, Frank Bennett Crash Land. I'm sorry, cash landing. Just

spoiler alert, Frank Bennett kind of has the same attitude as Richard Cheese. But it's fake. Oh, he fakes the thing. I wish. He's the Frank Bennett. It's fake. You know what? I prefer the fake. Richard Cheese, take a note. Take a line. I do too. Yeah, I do too. This is a cover of They Might Be Giants, Kiss Me, Son of God. What a great song to cover. Here is Frank Bennett. I've built a little empire out of some crazy garbage called the blood of the exploited working class.

But they've overcome their shyness now They're calling me your highness And the world screams Kiss me, son of God I destroyed the bond of friendship And respect between the only people Left who'd even look me in the eye Now I laugh and make a fortune

From the same ones that I tortured And the world screams Kiss me, son of God I look like Jesus Or so they say But Mr. Jesus is very far away Now you're the only one here Who can tell me

If it's true That you love me And I love me I've built a little empire out of Some wacky garbage called The blood of the expletid working class But they've overcome their shyness now They're calling me your highness

And the world screams Kiss me, Son of God, That whole crazy world screams Kiss me, son of God Kiss me, you crazy, son of God Kiss me, son of God. Kiss me, son of God. Roses are red, and I love to dance.

When I'm looking for great shows, I go to frog pants. How was dinner last night, Harry?