The Morning Stream - TMS 2980: Jackson Polyp

Episode Date: March 19, 2026

The Call is Coming from INSIDE the Colon! Hi Brian! How's Your Arsehole? We Only Want Her Laying There For HALF A Day!! Mom's got a fresh batch of runnin' butter! Spider crotch phone. With great polyp comes great responsibility. Schmidt Crateefter. Must Hang Sally. Pinchers vs fangs. You sleep. I watch. Nekkid Phone. Stoned and funny. They Named the Cat Winston. I've moved the yogurt. I do like SLEEEEEEEEP with Wendy and more on this episode of The Morning Stream. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Did you know that Snoopy would be 76 years old in 2026? That's like 532 in dog years. Anyway, sign up and support our Patreon at patreon.com slash TMS. Coming up on the morning stream, the call is coming from inside the colon. Hey, Brian, how's your arsehole? We only want her laying there for half a day. Mom's got a fresh batch of running butter. Spider-cotch phone.

With great polyp comes great responsibility. Schmidt-Kratifter. Must hang Sally Pinschers versus fangs You sleep I watch Naked phones Stoned and funny They named the cat Winston

I've moved the Oh I've moved the yogurt I do like sleep With Wendy and more On this episode of the morning stream I blew out my knee jazz resizing So I don't want a guy that's too active Judas priest man

The morning stream. Good. Real good. Hello everybody and welcome to TMS. This is the morning stream for March 19th, 2026. I am Scott Johnson. That is Brian Ibbett. Hello, I'm back and better than ever.

Yeah, whistling a new tune today. Oh, three. of both ends I am, yes. I'm whistling in harmony today. Sure. In stereo, you might say. That's right, exactly. Would they be a swing that's left and right? What's up and down?

I don't know what that would be. Yeah, you turn your head and it's stereo. Okay, it's still stereo. It's fine. It's like your car's tipped over and you're just hearing the radio that way. Exactly. Brian is fresh off a trip to the endoscopy unit and got a colonoscopy yesterday. Like you all should be doing at a certain age.

Yes. You should be doing it at a regular, regular. basis let your doctor tell you how frequent for me that frequency uh i had one done during the pandemic this is the five year because back in the pandemic days uh when i had that first one done they did find a polyp and they said you probably should it's it's nothing but uh you should probably go have another one done in five years they put you on the five year plan they put me on the five year plan then i made it the six year plan by going one year later sure no i understand But I'm happy to say that, well, I still found a polyp.

Yeah. Yeah. But here's the deal. Like, they wheeled me out. Or, well, let's, you know, let's not jump ahead too far here. Yeah. Yeah, I'll say this. They, it's a well-oiled machine at the old endoscopy center, right?

It's like, all right, you be here at 6.15 a.m. We're going to check you in procedures at 7, bang, bang, boom. And I'm like, all right, well, that's a long. time. But at like 630, another person comes in, 645. Like, there was a, you know, I'm in this, in this prep area where it's a bunch of little curtain rooms. And they pull the curtain so you can do your deal. And that, you know, had three people come in, one person doing the vitals, another person explaining what they're going to do. Another person, the doctor comes in and says, all right, you know, there's a one thousand chance that there's some bleeding,

because we, you know, if we were a polyp, we take it out and there's some bleeding, blah, blah, blah, or we tear the lining, and you just need to come back for another colonoscopy, if that's the case. I'm like, great. Wonderful. I almost said, how long has it been since that's happened? Has it been more than 99? Yeah, what does the board say that says the number since last bleeding? This many colonoscopies since a...

Oh, gosh. I remember them telling me the same thing, but I feel like I blocked out. the, yeah, that potential. Because all of a sudden, as soon as like,

he's handing you an iPad to sign, and all of a sudden I can think is, geez, just one in a thousand, huh? I've beat those odds.

Yeah, yeah. And I don't want to do this again that quick. Exactly. Exactly. So, of course,

I still signed it. And all that stuff. Like, it was 45 minutes, and I didn't realize how quickly, because they will me in. And the first thing you see

is a nice clock, little red digital clock that you're facing on the wall that, that says 7 o'clock and 28 seconds like wow you guys are on the ball like when was the last time you went to a doctor thing and the time they told you was exactly the time they did something extremely rare like even major surgeries get delayed or pushed or changed or whatever all the time and these guys man it's like an assembly plant in there they got a quota they got to get yeah exactly so um so uh they've got me hooked up with the IV and they start putting the the prophenol in my system and so talking to the doctor I said so about how many of these do you do a day these like typically you know 15 16 a day and I start saying so it's kind of like that thing where you know you see an asshole and you're like oh that's an asshole and then you I was going to ask

how far into this joke did you get because I love those videos where people try to talk or sing you know yeah yeah and they sing like in fact they should have sent it to you I saw one recently where they were doing a spice girl's song. Oh, really? Yeah. And the girl was like, as soon as they saw it. Oh, they did it themselves too. They pushed the plunger and then went,

Okay. Tell you what I want. You know, and they're doing the song. And they don't get, but like 10 seconds in. And then they look really strange. And then I have to flip past it because it weirds me out.

I don't like it. It's got to be, yeah, that's freaky. But, uh, no, um,

um, you didn't get all the way done with this story. I didn't really tell the joke. I was going to, you know, it was getting the whole, uh, justified, you know, to be the all of the family.

You see an asshole. If you see 15 assholes a day, maybe you're the asshole. Yeah, maybe you're the asshole, doctor. But I didn't get so far. Or he didn't even start the joke. But, um, wait, did this help? This helped us. So you didn't get it early.

You didn't get like I did, but the guy starting too early because you were talking. No. No, I was. That's a great idea. No. But I don't think, I don't think it was that I was stalling him. I think it just, they, they knocked me out quick. Because it wasn't even like he was still putting on his gloves was the last thing I remember.

Okay. All right. He didn't even have the camera in his hand. And I don't remember anything. Like I remember them saying, okay, lay on your side. All right. I'm pushing the plunger, and I watch her push the plunger in. And that's really it.

Like, I remember thinking, oh, there's one of the leads on my chest is kind of pinchy, but that's it. Like, gazongia. And you get that weird taste. your throat right before? I didn't. I was waiting for that. Like the, I was waiting for the, um, kind of the cold feeling in your, your veins that you get. And then that metallic, um, yeah, metallic, like rust or something. Yes. I hate that. Uh. Yeah. So, um, no, neither of those things happened. Um, next thing I know, I'm back in the curtained off area and Tina's walking in. She's saying, oh, hey, how long have you been here? I'm like, I don't know. You're the first thing I've

scene. It's so weird how it's like that. Like a lot of sleep sometimes. It's just like, did I even go to sleep? It's so weird. Exactly. And there's no, there's no guy on Twitter live. Like there was no, you know, at least not that I'm aware of.

Where they're, who knows, maybe they have some fun and they talk to you while they're wheeling you and say, right. Who do you think is the president of the United States? It's a Cheeto, I think. I think it's a human. snack. Exactly. So hold on a second.

Like, so, yeah, so my understanding, we have Tolbert or whoever can weigh in on this, but my understanding is it used to be a more fentanyl-based thing, not like the street shit,

but, you know, the actual medical grade. Medical grade fentanyl, yeah. And that had like a way slower comeback. Yeah. You know,

and so you were stoned and funny for a while. But I think now the way this stuff works is when it lets off, it just kind of goes, and you just feel like you woke up for maybe a short nap or something. Totally. Yeah. My, phone automatically has an alarm that goes off at 735 because I check in.

My mom has asked me and I'm a good boy, so I do it, to check in with her every day at 7.30, but I was getting out of Orange Theory at 730, and so I changed it at 735. And I haven't changed it back in the year that I haven't been going to Orange Theory. So I left at 735. But it's, you know, check on her because she lives alone. If she falls and she doesn't respond, then at least it's, at least she's not. laying there for a day. Yeah, no, good point.

She's laying there for half a day. Yeah, we don't want her to be in like that lady in the commercial saying, I've fallen and I can't do. I've fallen. Yeah, that lady. Yeah. So, uh, my alarm went off. Like, basically, I was awake and putting clothes on when my alarm went off at 735. So 35 minutes from, hey, doc, how many of these do you do a day to, all right, done with the whole thing, putting clothes on.

Yeah. And it made it a lot easier to, you know, eat and like, go. get out to the car. They still made sure that I got in a wheelchair. They had to wheel me out to the car. It's like, fine. I'll do this. Yeah, I'll do that. That's always a nice little ride. Plus, you know, and they won't let you drive. But I'll be honest, when I got out to the car, I felt like I could drive. Like, it didn't feel impaired. Whereas the one back in 2015, I was really impaired. It was jazz. No, same. Like, I felt, didn't feel woozy at all. I honestly, you know, they said, just get some rest today. I said, you know what? I will. and that's what I did. Even though I easily, well, all right, I did come down and do about an hour's worth of freelance for somebody that had to have something that went out yesterday. But. Sir, sure.

That's not bad. But I spent the rest of the day on the couch watching almost the entirety of season five of Fargo. I finished it, but I had started before. Five's great. Jeez. Five is great. I forgot about freaking kids in the hall, Dave, um, Dave. Dave

Danish Graves Dave Foley Yeah Danish Graves Such a crazy character Sounds like a serious donut Oh my gosh Yeah he

It's one of the great things about this show Is the weird casting for side characters they do Yeah totally Oh got to go watch all that again And that dude A man comes to a man And tells him to get a woman He's right up there, dude.

He's a tiger. I'd put him with some of the greatest like Cohen Brothers invention characters of all time. I'd put him up there with Anton Sugar. Oh, yeah. Like, he's up there with that. You figure this guy knows Anton Sugar. Yeah, they feel like they're from the same,

they're cut from the same cheese. And isn't this the movie? This is the one where he's got the little receiver that's from No Country for Old Men where he's trying to track him, right? This is the season. Oh, yeah, the little, um, right. That's a, that's a thing they did on purpose.

It's an actual replica. of the one sugar's using to find to find Thanos that time he tried to find him. Oh, I didn't know that. That's super cool. Yeah. So the idea or the thinking is these these kind of dudes at least

run in the same circles or whatever. Cinematic universe. Yeah, this is how these guys roll. They're just always, you know, doing that shit. I love that show. The only thing only complained, and it's not a complaint, because it's still, it's still an important bit, is

the council of lindas the um you know where uh where dorothy uh when she wants to find um uh sheriff tillman's first I'm sheriff not tillman sheriff uh Roy

oh I just freaking watched it is it Tillman okay it is Tillman I think that I think you have it yeah okay uh it goes to find uh Roy Tillman's first wife Linda and she she finds like the um

the compound with all the lindas where she has to make a puppet show explaining how she got there oh that is a weird excursion yeah it is when what it turns out i won't spoil it for people haven't seen it but then what that a whole thing turns out to be is like okay well yeah that was a side trip that maybe we didn't necessarily need to go on yeah i'll give you that yeah but that's like it's i'd still call it an a plus season it's like people when they don't like the fly episode of Breaking Bad. Right, exactly. It's such a, it's such a minor part of it.

And, oh, and, uh, uh, you know, I had his name in my head earlier and I can't remember it was, um, but he was, uh, on the new guy.

Oh, I'm sorry, the new girl. Yeah, plays, um, the deputy guy. Um, yes,

he is so freaking good too. Yeah. He can do, he can, he can, he's a broad range dude. He can do funny. He can do serious.

He can freaking do bank commercials, which is what he's been doing. no. His name almost came to me. Something with him Morris. Or no. Morris. Lamorne Morris. Is that it?

Lamorn. Lamorn. Lamorne Morris? Lemorn Morris. Well, that sounds fun. I hope that's right. That is it. Lamorne Morris.

Okay, yeah. He's great. Yeah. What was this character on New Girl? I can't remember where they called him. He replaced the other guy. They named the cat the same thing. He was...

I forgot about that. Yeah. Winston. Oh, Winston. That's it. It's Winston. It's Winston. Yes, Winston. Yes, Winston. Because there's Winston. There's the guy with the last name, first name. The weird one.

Yes. Every time I see him, I yell the name. Schmidt. Oh, that's it. Schmidt. I was about to say shit. And then you said Schmidt. And I went, oh, no, wait. My brain wouldn't let the two live together for a minute. Yeah, anyway, yeah, if you guys haven't seen the entirety of the Fargo series, do yourselves a favor, man, so good. And really, you can jump into any season and watch an incredible season of the show.

God, just the stuff between Jason Schwartzman and Chris Rock in season four. Oh, so good. Speaking of Timothy Allifant, way too short of a role, but an awesome little role. And Oscar winner, Jesse Buckley, playing the most Fargo woman you've ever seen. scene. Yeah, if you want to hear an Irish girl do the most amazing Minnesota South Dakota accent. Yeah. Holy shit. Just a regular Florence Nightingale. Oh, she's good. She's really good. Anyway, she gave Schwartzman a handy in the car. Yes, she did. Yeah. And then because I finished that up, I started watching the new season of

Last One Laughing, which is the British competition where they put what, like eight, I think eight comedians in a room for five and a half hours and any time someone laughs they're kicked out. Oh, you've told me, I've never saw it, but you told us about this. The new season so far is great and it's got like all these people from Taskmaster them like, oh my God,

I love these people. They ought to put like, if they put Matt Barry in there, just everyone would lose. Oh, Matt Barry, yeah, he would destroy everybody. Because he didn't have to hardly work at it. No, all he has to do is talk is, I'm going to go get myself an Oolong tea.

I know I've turned him into a southern gentleman. I don't know how that happened. Yeah, but he could say, he'd almost say anything. Like, my stomach hurts. Exactly. Bastards or whatever, and they'll all go, and the show's over, one episode. Totally.

Everybody's out all of a sudden, yes. That's wild. Well, that's, I'm glad it went well. I'm glad, you know, you're still on the five-year plan, but I'm glad to. Still the five-year plan. So, yeah, that's right. I was going to tell you, um, 30-6-year-pol. Do you get to name this poll up?

Do you get to give it a name? Oh, I can. Let's do it. We'll leave it up to the Tadpool. Tadpool gets to name the Pallup. All right. I like it. Along came Pallup is what it's called.

Oh, man. Polly the Pallup. That's gnarly. That's right. Paul. If we're going to assign gender to it and it's a male, we'll call him Paul. That's right. He's Jake Pallup.

Oh, man. I'm sorry. That Pallup already exists. It does. Yes. I can't think of any better way to honor him than to name something. they pulled out of my ass after him. But the doctor even said, yeah, it's nothing at all to be worried about.

But because there was one, we're going to keep you on the five-year plan. Yeah, I was bracing for it. I thought for sure they'd tell me that just because, I don't know, it seems like everybody gets a little or something. Yeah, yeah. And I'm on the tenure, but I don't know, it's still, part of it makes me go, well, should I just voluntarily be on the five-year? Because I don't want to, nobody wants to go through that, man.

Like, colon cancer is the freaking worst thing in the world. It's the worst, yeah. And one day of starving yourself, just to be sure, is worth it. But, you know, every five years. If your doctor says you don't need to come in for 10 years, then I think you're safe, not going in for 10 years. Yeah. I can't wait until I'm like, I don't know, 70.

Yeah, I know, because they don't do it after certain. Exactly. I think I've got, you know, maybe two more in me. Yeah, so to speak. A couple more in you. And then after that, it's like, there may be something going down. I don't know. It doesn't matter because if they'd find it, what am I going to do?

Right, exactly. Yeah, just let it slip by like a mortal coil. Who knows what the technology for colonoscopies might be in five years. Maybe they'll, you know. That's true. They already get that weird robot capsule thing that'll go through you. Exactly. I don't know if that's in wide use yet, but it's, you know, something.

Nanobots. Yeah, something like that'll come up. Put some nanobots in me. AI assisted butt plunging. That's right. Exactly. Well, we've got a big day ahead of you guys. We've got Wendy coming up later and a good topic for her.

And we've also got some news lined up, but we have to talk about who it's brought to us by. This news is brought to us by. Brought to you by Coverville. Yes, Coverville today right after TMS. The music of Wilson Pickett. No, not Wilson Phillips. Wilson Pickett, who has passed away a while ago. Let's see, when did Wilson Pickett die?

He died years ago, but he, 2006, but he would have been, as of yesterday, would have been 85. So it's a good time to celebrate the music. You know him probably from his cover of Land of a Thousand Dances. The, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. The version you know of that song is probably his version. Same with Mustang Sally. In the Midnight Hour, who's, you know, which has been covered a million times. lots of covers of and by Wilson Pickett including

what was the pulled one weird one that was like oh my god can't believe he covered that Mama told me not to come by Randy New or well written by Randy Newman but Three Dog Night is the is the version that people know I'm saying that's one I know but yeah anyway so that'll be coming up right after

TMS today at Twitch.tv slash coverville Very, very nice. Our first story today is about the Chinese National who was arrested over attempting to smuggle 2,000 queen ants into the country from Kenya. Yep. Apparently Kenya's got, you know, ants to spare, meaning the bugs, not your relations, you know. Not as in and uncles. Yeah, and uncles. These are ants and other bugs, I guess.

Yeah. Chinese National has been arrested in Kenya, Maine airport there. of attempting to smuggle in these 2,000 queen garden ants out of the country. Wow. Zhang Kuan, I think is how you say it, was intercepted during a security check at Jomo Kanata, Kenyatta, rather, international airport or J-K-I-A. That sounds like just kidding, AI. J-Kai.

J-Kai. I guess it would be J-Kia. Jay-Kia. Oh, I love their hot dogs. Anyway, in the capital of Nairobi, after authorities, discovered a large consignment, they call it, of live ants in his luggage bound for China. He has yet to respond to the accusation of an investigator saying in court he was linked to an ant trafficking network. Yeah, that exists. An ant trafficking network. Do they have a, is there

subreddit? Oh, man. I'd read that subreddit. Totally. I have a, I have a vial full of 13 black ants. Who wants it? Yeah, you got to the top better. Let's go. Start debating. The ants are protected by international biodiversity treaties, and their trade is highly regulated. Last year, Kenya's Wildlife Service of the KWS, warned of a growing demand for garden ants, scientifically known as Messer Cephalotus.

Or cephalotes? Cephalots. Cephalots. Yeah, I don't know. Sounds like a Dr. Seuss character. The cephalots. Flotes. In a witch?

I know. We were just talking about Fargo. Speaking of another all-time villain man That guy Oh my God So good In Varga Can't even watch Harry Potter now

After that Anyway This is all in Europe and Asia Where collectors keep them as pets So this isn't even like a You know Yeah And I'm gonna guess

That the ants that we're familiar With that we see all the time here You know In the mountain west Are nothing compared to the ants That they're talking about From Kenya That are probably like

As big as your thing thumb, right? Like those big fat ants? Yeah, it's like going to Mississippi and finding out what a real roach looks like. That's right. The ends that Scott Lang used to ride. There you go. Or Pim. Oh, these are bastards. Let me show you a picture. Oh, really? Okay. I'm not like this. Oh, good Lord. All right, hold on. Okay. Oh, I'm excited. It's really nasty. I'm excited to see your aunt. Oh, yeah. Now, how big these are? Are you to see some comparison? That just looks like it. That just looks like a typical ant. Yeah, hold on.

I just don't like ants up close. Yeah. Freakish. Yeah. I can't find anything where it's like, here's a, because if you're going to have an ant as a pet, it's got to be bigger than normal, right? Yeah, yeah.

Digging here, I don't see. There's nobody's holding one up with a hand or anything. It's just all close-ups to these things. This is the, here you go. This is the size that I worry about right. Here, I'm giving it to you in Discord. All right. Pull that up.

Here we go. Oh, yeah, dude. Oh, that just gives me it. That gives me feelings that I don't like. Yeah, I don't know if that's the one from Kenya, but. He's got big old pinchers. It does. Like, nasty.

Yeah, that's like, that's hamsterized. I don't want an ant that's hamsterized. No, no. No, no. Oh, you know what? Did we find it? No, we didn't. No, no, we did.

Let's see. Okay, this is a picture. We're freaking people out with these photos. Oh, they don't like the ant photos, everybody. For some reason, this won't open because it's some weird. Sent in a letter to Therapy Thursday then. Oh, geez. This is interesting.

They're capsules. They're kept in capsules, which you can see them going through here. That's not very big. So those ants aren't huge. Okay. But these little capsules are what you smuggle them in. There's another one for you. Another picture here.

It will just disturb the hell out of it. Oh, look at them in their little capsules. Yeah, their little self-contained little cryo units or whatever. Well, that can't be fun. Oh, my gosh. Where is this one from? You know. I know.

I saw that photo. I'm like, okay. Yeah. Yeah. Rather not. Nope. You know, it's funny. My wife can see that and not bother her at all, but if it was a spider, she'd leave the room.

She'd leave the country. She can't do spiders. But for me, for me, the ants, that's scarier than a spider to me. It kind of is because the, I don't know, pinchers versus fangs, there's something about... Yeah. Because, you know, we've heard that the pinchers, if an ant was human size, those pinchers would be like industrial-grade, caterpillar farm equipment kind of... Yeah, jaws of life, opening your car or whatever. Exactly, yeah.

I don't want that in my life ever. Look, I don't want either. I don't want a spider that big on my hand either. just saying of the two, if I had two hands, big ant, big spider, I would be more inclined to freak out about the ant for some reason. My wife would be the opposite. You know what?

And I think Crazy James might have nailed why it is. You see a spider? It's just one spider. You see an ant? There's a thousand, 10,000 other ants you're not saying. Oh, that's true. I think that's what makes ants worse.

That's, you know what? Good point. Although sometimes the spider's got a big sack. And if you break that, all the babies will come out. And that's freaky in its own way. But, God. But yeah, if it's not a pregnant spider, I'll take the spider.

Yeah, there was a story that I think Dan Klass told on the bitterest pill in California where he, you know, he's out in his driveway, it's nighttime, California nighttime, nice in summertime weather. And he sees a spider coming up the driveway and he's like, nope, none of this. And so he goes and he gets a shovel, like a flat-edged shovel and wax it. and it was a mother spider carrying all these babies on her back on her abdomen and they're all like running around the driveway. Horrifying. I can't think like that's, yeah, that that's all I think about now when I see a spider outside.

Yeah. And now you've killed their, they're, you've given them all a reason to seek revenge against the human. Exactly. Those kids are going to avenge their mother. They're all. Exactly. Nasty. him. He killed mom. He can't get all of us.

That's so true. Yeah. Another story for you here. Okay. People are churning butter on their runs. Like when they go running. I heard churning butter and runs, but it wasn't the sentence that I was expecting. Okay. It reads a little weird. I agree with you.

It says we're sorry to be the ones to tell you this, says this headline. You may ask you yourself why. Libby Cope in Oregon. based outdoor and running content creator. So she's like an influencer that runs. Yeah. Says in her viral TikTok video that more than 2.3 million views that jumpstarted the trend. The real question is why not she added

while pouring a carton of heavy cream into a Ziploc bag and sprinkling a little sea salt in there. And the article goes on to say, and that dear reader may be in fact the entire crux of the butter run. Because who amongst us who take part in the sport of running hasn't at some point wondered what exactly is the point of this? Sure, maybe we're getting some P.Bs and Strava likes and making sizable dents in our audiobooks. But at the end of the day,

aren't we all just running nowhere? Wow, CBC. I expected better from the CBC. I know. What's going on in Canada. So is she just putting in her pocket, the Ziploc bag, or is she holding it while she runs and it's just like turning? That, what you just described. Really? Yep. And then So if you get the little bag, you put it on your thing. And then as you run, it sloshes and basically is like churning butter. How much does she have to run to like turn a Ziploc bag full of heavy cream into? Oh, they don't get into that? Let's see.

Doesn't it? Somebody made ice cream? Shut up, dude. That's stupid. Oh, really? Interesting. Yeah. Huh.

This article's the way it's written sucks. Yeah, it really does. So they don't really give me good details on like... The Raith 86 says, Brian will be churning butter on his bike run too. I will, but not the kind you want. Nope. No sea salt in that. No chode butter for you.

That's right. Anyway, that's a weird thing. I don't know. I mean, I mostly are doing it for the clicks. I mean, let's be honest. Of course they are, yeah, but still like... There's no practicality of this. And what are you going to do?

Show up at home. Hey, kids, get the bread out. Mom's got a fresh batch or running. butter. Exactly. That's nice and warm from being outside for last hour. Gross. Gross. That's actually disgusting. It is. Yeah. All right. Well, on that note, that note of all notes. That's newt. Let us. We're going to take a detour and we're going to learn how to help each other right here on Therapy Thursday. Something wrong, Batman. Has anybody seen Wendy? Well, I don't know. Have we seen her? Yes, we have. She's right here. Hi, Wendy. How are you? Hi. Hi. How the heck? How that you're so calm, man.

I was going to say, did you know that that's an answer like, oh, I didn't know I did therapy Thursday today. Oh, hey. Hey, what's going on? Nice to see you there. Hi. How are you, okay, it's, it was 76 degrees here yesterday. Yeah, what is happening? I don't know. What is happening? I don't get it. Like March? 81. 81 here. And that's why I switched to the, it's, you know, first. at least the next few days. It's, it's Hawaiian shirt time for me. Yeah, nice short sleeve in it. Holy cow.

We're having a bit of a not quite like you, but it was one degree on Tuesday. Oh. And it'll be 68 on Saturday. Obviously that's not like back to back, but that's a that's far. Yeah.

Yeah, you might I'd call it a dozy of weather change. Yeah. That's summer. 80. What? Are you just lost? And we might hit 90 on Saturday as the current time. Oh my gosh. That's insane.

Yeah. For March 23rd or whatever it is. Yeah. L.A. I know was like in the upper 90s this week too. I was getting hot there. All my non-air conditioner friends are pissed. Because most of the year they don't have to worry about it. It's like, oh, it's 78 all the time.

But then when it hits 90, you're like, yeah, maybe we should get a central air unit here. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. Yeah. I-Corps says it's almost like the climate is changing. Weird. Weird. 104 in Phoenix today, so at least we're not there.

Can I share something cool about climate change? Because no one ever gets good news. I have an informant on the inside of the UN who likes to make my days better by giving me cool things that are happening. And fascinating. The like people-led initiatives in Pakistan. have essentially almost eliminated their reliance on oil. They do so much solar energy because they were so sick of their grid going out and so sick of it not working. And so they're pretty much like almost energy independent.

Think about that. That's crazy. Wow. That's amazing. Yeah. Right? So how translatable is it to other markets? It's any place that has the sun.

Yeah. Who has the sun? This will work for you. I know you guys now have 80 degrees in March. She might want to be getting your son out. Yeah. Do you remember when we're kids, the stereotype of this is the month you would fly your kites in? That seemed like that was still a thing for a long time.

And now I don't think that's a thing anymore. It was like 10 minutes of spring. Yeah. Yeah. I don't like it. No, I don't. Well, anyway, let's get to it today. Wendy is, of course, a actual mental health professional.

She comes here on Thursdays and slums it with us to help you and everyone around you with your problems. That's a bold statement. Maybe I should track that back. but. But anyway, we're going to get right to it. Every problem you have. That's right. Today's email comes to us from someone we're going to call awake at 3am.

Which sounds like Brian sometimes, right? You're up at a weird hour. Freed with a 30. Usually, yeah. Yeah. So I'm looking, I'm excited to learn. Like on purpose, Brian? No.

Oh, gosh, no. Okay. No, my Brian might be in the blast here today. I'm going to be in the blast. I'm going to be excitedly listening to what you have to say here. Excellent. Here's how it starts. Hey, Scooch, Wendy, and B. Just the letter B.

It's fine. I'll take it. It says after another night of staring at the ceiling at 3 o'clock in the morning, I figured it was time to ride in. I've always been a decent sleeper, but over the past year, something shifted. Falling asleep isn't the problem. It's waking up in the middle of the night with my brain fully activated. Every worry to do and worst-case scenario suddenly feels urgent and unsolvable in the dark. The next day, I'm more irritable, anxious, unless.

patient. Small things feel overwhelming. I can't concentrate. And I'm just dragging myself through life instead of actually living it. I've tried the usual fixes, limiting screens, cutting caffeine, meditation apps with very mixed results. And I've noticed the obvious trap. The worse I sleep, the more I worry about not sleeping. Oh man, this, this I can relate to because I do this all the time. Hate it. Yeah. What's really getting me or getting to me is that this isn't just about being tired. Every time my sleep falls apart, my mental health goes with it. I feel. more reactive, more emotional, and honestly less like myself. I can't be the

only one. What I'd love to understand is why sleep disruption hits us so hard mentally and what actually works when your brain won't shut off at 3 o'clock in the morning. Thanks for everything you do. Awake at 3 a.m. I'd like to think he wrote this at 3 a.m. from his bed as well. It sounds like you did. Yeah.

The first part of it just sounds like he did. Yeah. Well, one way or the other, we're going to try to help you out here, Wendy. How do you want to go on this? Yeah. So if we're assuming it's abdued, then I would have actually different answers. I don't know why I gendered this. Oh, this is interesting.

The fact that it would be different answers depending on. It would. Yeah. Okay. I think it's because this person wrote scooch and you're like, that's either a Midwest mom. Yeah. Scooch.

Or a dude. Okay. All right. One of the two. Anyway, okay, because the answer is going to be a little different. And unfortunately, they didn't give their age. That also is what's going to matter. Yeah.

Okay. So let's just start with the very last paragraph. I can't be the only one. Yeah, true. You are definitely not the only one. And we're going to make sure we have a general sense of why sleep disruption hits us mentally so hard. And then what actually works to shut your brain off. Okay, we're going to make sure we cover those two things.

But I like that this person's already like, I've tried some things, limited screens, cut caffeine, meditation apps. And the meditation app, let me just say, there's some science to back up. We've got a couple ways to treat chronic insomnia or what this is called. This has an acronym. It's WASO, which is wake after sleep onset. I'm very exciting. Oh, wow. And that means you can follow asleep because there's different forms of insomnia.

Insomnia is essentially not being able to sleep. Somnia means you could sleep in. Somnia means you can't. Oh, I never heard anyone use it, though. It would be funny to hear somebody go, I have pretty good somnia. Yeah, they know. That's not actually the real word. But that's like flammable versus inflammable.

Yeah. Right. Exactly. And so the being able to fall asleep initially to initiate sleep, a lot of people will struggle with that. That's a certain kind of insomnia. And then you have this waking too early, you know, sometime in the night. I think it feels like the most common one.

I'm not sure stats wise if it is. But and that has to do with what the emailer actually was referring to a little bit like stress and various things and, you know, certain things we do in the, in the day. like caffeine intake or other things will, you know, add to the, this effect of waking up at 3 a.m. And really what most of us are finding trouble with is falling back asleep. So say we wake up, we've just kind of come to the top of our, our biarrhythms are usually an hour and a half and we go through the whole, you know, REM cycle and out. And when we come back out, we're kind of at a lighter, you know, it's like a wakeful stage almost, right? But then we cycle back down. If we have a full,

nights good rest, sleep. We are doing that cycle, but we're never coming out of it to full consciousness. But 3 a.m. seems like a classic time where you're at the top of that cycle and then you wake up. And that's usually because there's some stress going on. There's other factors that have played a role. And then here's the gender difference. You can be an awesome sleeper your entire life, but when you are in your late 30s, early 40s, heading towards your 50s as a woman, you are starting to hit paramenopause heading towards menopause and the the hormone disruption will 100% ruin your sleep. Is that what the paramease? Paramease pre?

Is that what that essentially is? Yeah. Basically, yeah. Like, yeah. I'm curious. Like, um, and then full menopause is when you've stopped menstruating, but this is all of the symptoms and crap before then when you, when you're, you're out of whack hormonally. And sleep has everything to do with hormones, right?

And so suddenly it's all up and down and all over the place and you're waking up and not sleeping and stress. So let's all be kind to our 40-plus-year-old female friends because they have not slept and they might want to murder you. So I just want to warn you about that. We could do a whole episode on paramedipause. If anyone wants to write an email in, I would love to tackle that. I definitely, I see some chatter in the chat about it already. Kim's going through a lot of that right now.

The hot flash is a real, man. They're real. I got the hobbies. Tina was forced into it by the like the chemo and radiation. everything kind of triggered it early for her. Oh, I didn't know that was a thing. She's had it for years now. Wild.

Yeah. Yeah. When they have the heat flashes, just from a recent experience, I was at a movie theater with Kim. Movie theater is generally kind of cool. We have a blanket, you know. Yeah. And I'm sitting there and I suddenly feel like the sun's next to me.

And we're in cushy seats with some distance and I still feel it coming off of her. And she also helped because she kicked her blanket off. and she's like, oh, this is another one. But I could feel it coming off. It was crazy weird, weird experience. But anyway. Yeah. Yeah.

We'd love to tackle that. I just need, I need someone to give me a little jumping off point. But absolutely connected to those, you know, hormonal changes in women. Yeah. And then, and so really, you could just, like, live your whole life doing one thing and then suddenly this comes on in your life. Other people have kind of struggled off and on with. sleep. It sounds like Brian, you've had some history with this. How long do you feel like your your sleep, your wasso has been happening? It's probably been about a year now that I either

wake up at like, if I wake up at three, I'm usually awake for maybe an hour and then I'm able to get back to sleep. If I wake up at 4, 430, because there's that last, that last REM cycle, I just, I pretty much stay up. Yeah. And that's more the common thing. That's probably 80% of the time. Okay. Okay. And would you say it's every night? I'd say it's 80%. It's like, you know, four out of five nights. It's, it's the 4.30 a.m. But, but it's waking up early 95% of the time. Like, it's very, very rare that I sleep the whole night. Do you ever, is it the same days or is it different? Okay. No, no, different days. And it doesn't matter what I eat or drink or, yeah, most nights. And they've prescribed me trazadone. But I always feel like I'm groggy. If I, even if I take it before bed.

it's I wake up groggy. Yeah. And I don't always sleep the whole night with that either. Yeah. That's a thing, man. Yeah. Tell me about it. If you're waking up on Trasadone.

I know. Yes, exactly. Okay. All right. So very relatable for you to have, you know, some of like the feeling. And they also described this in the email of being almost, it's almost afraid of night. I'm like, oh, here we go. Yeah.

Right? Yeah. Yeah. So, Brian, do you mind talking about that? Just like what has happened when you think about sleep? You know, there's when I, like, no problem falling asleep. I can fall asleep, you know, within 10, 15 minutes at the beginning of the night. But yeah, when I wake up, even if I've got everything written down that I need to do the next day,

all I sit there and I think about, okay, well, I need to do this and oh, there's that. And I need to, got to start prepping for this thing. And now we got this in a few months. So I need to have that done. Um, even though all that stuff is, is perfectly documented on my to do list, I can't not think about that. And I've tried meditation. Meditation kind of works. It's more that I listen to a meditation thing and it just distracts me from thinking about that stuff.

And so, um, so that helps me fall asleep. But, uh, that's, that's even hit and miss. Yeah. And so you're, you're describing one of the treatments for this. Um, so we'll get into. let's do treatments first, then I'll get into it. Well, actually, let me back that up. Let's do Wyatt rex your mental health, and then we'll get into the treatments.

But mindfulness has a lot of good research on it, and sometimes, you know, half-hearted and mindfulness doesn't work. Sometimes it does for some people, right? So we'll get into that in a second. But let's just first talk about this idea of why it wrecks us so much. So we are looking at just one night of sleep deprivation, you know, you know, being up all night, right? We'll have our reflexes and our general functioning at about double the blood alcohol level of most states for driving.

So 205%. Wow. Okay. So and this is what's wild when you think of like the medical industry of, you know, training doctors like hazing them. So basically they're all operating drunk is what we're saying. Good thing I don't Uber or anything. Yeah, exactly, exactly. So we really do not do well, and everyone's going to vary a little bit.

Recently, I was looking at some stats about like super high performing the best athletes in the world, what their sleep schedules are. And it's wild. Like Usain Bolt, you know, fastest man, probably ever to run a 10-meter race, whatever. He sleeps, I think, 12 hours a day, some significant amount of time. And one of his gold-winning, like, world record-breaking situations, he was just getting up from a nap. And then he went and ran it. LeBron James, he's like 10, 11 hours. Like people who are really like at the forefront of physical ability are sleeping like toddler lengths amount of time, like just a lot, a lot of sleep.

And so we're going to vary based on what our needs are, what, you know, there's some genetic components. My family is split right down the middle. Three of us, they have Adams gene and they don't need sleep very much. And then the other three are mine or the other two are mine. And we could just sleep all day and all night if we want to. We are sleepers. So some of it might just be that, right? So if you think about your parents or kind of, you know,

where there's sleepwalkers in your family, you know, you tend to have some genetic components with sleep. And if everyone can remember, like I remembers a teenager, I could sleep a ton. And that's partly developmental and hormonal, right? We have various stages of our lives where it's different. Now, think about old people, you know, in their 80s, 90s, they're not sleeping 10 hours at night. They are winging up with the birds. They are. Yeah.

Or they're staying up really late. Tina's mom, like, stays up until 1, 2 o'clock in the morning and text Tina at 1 or 2 o'clock in the morning. I love people to do that that sort of forget that everybody else is on a different schedule. Yeah, they're like, what are you doing? You're like, oh, well, it's 10 a.m. And I'm calling you and you're like asleep. Yeah. So your rhythms get really, they change with age and time and hormones.

And there's a lot of factors happening here. So one thing I would recommend anyone who is struggling with sleep issues and especially this onset. So Brian, you said it's also been about a year? Yeah. Yeah, it's been about a year. You didn't have this before? If I did, it was really occasionally.

It was far less frequent than it is now. Okay. Okay. So, and similar to the emailer, that, you know, if there's a change, like it used to be fine and suddenly it's not, it might be worth doing a little investigating, you know. Do we have anything going on with your thyroid or some other sort of functioning endocrine system situation where it's just impacting you, right? The other piece would be like, what's happened in the last year? year, Brian, that's difficult in life globally or personally. I mean, that's been going on a lot longer than that.

I know, but yeah, no, there's probably some of that. Like, I stopped going to, it's funny, we brought up orange theory earlier today, but I stopped going orange theory about a year ago. And so, you know, keeping the weight down and failing or succeeding at that or lack of succeeding is probably, you know, one of the factors that I think about. And could easily be even part of it too, right? The extra weight for some reason is making me fall asleep different. Yeah.

It has an impact on breathing, which is another thing I wanted to mention. People are walking around living their lives thinking, I just had nine hours to sleep, why am I exhausted? Or I got seven hours of sleep, I'm exhausted. And so much when you sort of really look at it could be. that you are having breathing events in the night. You've stopped breathing. The snoring means you're not getting, you know, great oxygen.

It could be like, and this is when you gain weight. You tend to have more fatty tissue pressing down on your larynx and some other things. So it can be caused just by weight. It can also be, doesn't matter your size or shape. You've got, you know, you stop breathing and this is part of the challenge. So I would recommend anyone who is finding themselves exhausted, even though they should theoretically have rested to consider. They have sleep tests now that are just so much easier to do.

You don't have to go lay in a lab all night and try to sleep there. They can have you send you home with a kit and you can do it at home. And so there are lots of options there's to find out just to make sure you are breathing. And if you have a partner go, yeah, sometimes you wake up gasping. I'm like, okay, well, think about it. You're almost dying every night. Exactly. go get that dealt with.

Oh, my gosh. Scary as hell. And most of you don't know. That's the other part. You don't know what's happening. Your only symptom is that you feel pretty groggy also. Let me ask you. It would be great if you could hire somebody to just sleep in a bed with you, not sexually,

but just sleep in bed with you to let you know if you're waking up gasping or you're not breathing the middle of the night. Like a, you know, like a sleepstitute or something like that. Like one of those dogwarks. Walker services where the person's job is to just temporarily do a thing, have them do that. Exactly. And ironically, you'd have to hire an insomniac who could stay awake. Oh, right. That's true.

Yeah. You'd be able to not get sleep either. That's funny. I feel like this is a job for the robot. Is what it would be. Maybe, uh, well, they just do the night. They have a swing shift. They just do the night shift.

Right. Yeah. Just staring at you sleeping. Yeah, that's not weird at all. Let me, can I ask you it? So I'm going to do a little experiment here to just give people an idea of something. that happens to me. Now, most nights, I sleep pretty well, meaning solid for when I do finally fall asleep or when I fall asleep to when I wake up. But anytime I wake up in the night of any reason, let's say I got a pee or whatever it is. This is literally what I hear in my head. I'm not kidding when I say this. I'm going to play this. And you guys are going to hear what my brain sounds like when I wake up at like this 3 a.m. example. If that happens to me, and it's getting back to sleep because of what I hear that's hard.

And I literally hear this. And I hear that for as long as I'm awake. And it's all Scott voices though, right? No, it's like a million voices, maybe 100 voices. But they're all talking nonsense, all at the same time, like I'm in a crowded place. And they're all, I, it's obviously I'm not actually hearing. you know, physically hearing it. But the sensation is the same. Like it's indistinguishable. And I'll get up. I'm just frustrated with it now. I'll get up and go, oh, freaking shut up,

brain. And I'm, I'll go, you know, pee, wash my hands, go back home, go back to bed, lay there for a minute, listen to that for the next 30 minutes, 45 minutes. And then finally, maybe I'll go back to sleep and that'll be okay. And then I'm okay when I get up in the morning. But I, real quick. Is it so bad. Are you hearing individual voices or is it really like you're hearing so many over here. I'm hearing so many over all of them that I'm not actually able to make out anything anyone says. Wow. I hate it, dude. I hate it. Like it's just nonsense. Did I have a rate of hands? Does anyone have this before? I mean, maybe it's unique and I'm the only one. I don't know. I can tell you that this never was a thing until what we talked about last week when I, when I hard, cold turkeyed those

stupid benzos back in the day. Oh, yeah. So may have something to do with it. I have one voice in my head when I wake up at 4.30, but it's just saying, all right, you need to do this. Oh, don't forget you got to do this. Oh, I would love that. See, my problem is, it's just such nonsense and it's nobody taught. And then so I'll go. You don't want my voice in your head at 430 in the morning, Scott. But it's like going, so imagine me laying there and you hear this. And I'm going, okay, okay, okay. I just got to think of one thing. Okay, okay. I got to think. I got to think or whatever. Like, I can't. It's that bad. Wow. And it's not every night. It's not all the time, but it's often enough where I dread that it might be happening. Okay.

I got an idea. I got an idea to try. So we talked last week or whenever it was about the subtle differences between a panic attack and a heart attack. Remember that? And you guys know Victor Frankel, the famous psychologist who was in the concentration camp guy, right? Yeah. So one piece of his research that was pretty early on for this type of thing. And I love stuff like this because it's like reverse psychological.

which is my favorite thing, is that he worked with panic attack patients and had them lean into the panic, meaning try to sweat as much as possible, you know, when it occurs, try to breathe crazy, try to make this the worst panic attack you've ever had.

And what happens is essentially by attempting to make it something or try to control it in the, the wrong direction. We're always trying to control it in the other direction, right, which is make it stop. But this was to like lean into it and force it to be worse. They found that panic attacks would be, would subside in 90 seconds. Typically takes longer than that.

Usually. With other techniques. Yeah. And so I read that after we talked about that last week. And I thought one more cool example of how like when you do the opposite of what you want to do. it has this effect. So I'm wondering, Scott, are you creating the, you know, you're fighting against the crowd noise? I wonder what happens if you lean into the crowd noise.

Well, I actually so, I mean, and for years you've been, you've always encouraged this idea of face your fears, do your work, you know, if you're afraid of crowds being more crowds, you know, things like that. In this particular case, like it doesn't create new anxiety. or there's nothing scary about it to me. It's just annoying because it's literally like everyone won't shut up so I can go to sleep. And I've never really thought about how to lean into that. So how would you, what would that look like? Like, is it, would it just be, all right, it's a party? Yeah.

Exactly. Yeah. You may not be able to quiet the voices, but maybe you can start enjoying the voices. Yeah, you're like, all right. Can we sing up and maybe sing a group song? That's right. Sing together. And it always frustrates me because during normal waking hours during the day, I don't really have the no energy thing.

Some, you know, some the testosterone levels are so low that they, I now supplement for that. And so that's been way better since then. That was a huge part of it. But during the day, I've got plenty of energy. It's fine. I don't crash it too. And like all those things are fine. So I feel like I'm getting the sleep when I need it.

It's just that this one thing happens. And yes, it happens more when there's. more going on or there's more stress and there's definitely been a lot of that lately. So there's, I can tell that's help that's, that's triggering it. The question is, you know, what does what does facing that down look like? Is there a way to isolate any of it and make sense of it? Because right now it's just nonsense. See if you can narrow down to one voice.

Yeah. Because it's so, it's just nonsense. Scott, there's some leftover Chinese food in the fridge. I know. You have some peltz that you need to deliver. and World War I cast. That's right. Always pelt.

There's always some peltz. But, you know, like if I went to, even if I got a craving in the middle of the night, they would only make it worse because these, that's the other trigger I'm aware of. If I eat too late, this happens. Oh, totally ruins you. Yeah.

So, yeah, I don't know. I just don't know how to lean into it. At this age, none of us should be eating after 7 p.m. Right. Like, it, we are no longer operating as normal machines. We are broken machines that need tons. See, maybe that's the problem is that I'm, the problem is that I.

I do, you know, we don't eat dessert right after dinner. Not really dessert, but I'll, like, have a little thing of yogurt at 8 o'clock. Maybe I need to move that up to seven. Yes. All right. That's what you're going to do, Brian. Scott, you're going to try to feel like this is a party and they're just there to, you know, mingle.

You walk through the airport and you're going to get, you're going to one of those massage booths. And you're going to have a relaxing day. But anything that makes it a little more playful, just try it because what what ultimately we're doing I mean you're either having auditory hallucinations which is possible or you are literally just having a strange response that is how your stress sort of shows up and you're having particular you know and everyone can maybe describe different weird sleep issues that are you know kind of a little bit strange or the way they dream or etc right so we're all a little bit different but there are some just really

core things. And that is that we know is that you really need to eat not late and you need to not exercise too late. That's the other thing that keeps you wakeful. You need not have caffeine or coffee late. Sometimes people just any kind of soda or even carbonation will cause this. If you're having heartburn or you're having, you know, all sorts of other things are going to be messing with this. If you have any kind of pain, right, that keeps you up. So to be, to get your sleep hygiene and order. There's lots of great lists. We could, you know, start following them. I think, Brian, let's try for you. We're going to bump your yogurt up to seven. Moving it up. Yep. Moving it to seven. Scott, you're going to play with the noises, just like when

you were a kid. Remember, you had a nightmare and you make it into something lovely. Kind of see what happens there. It's good. You're not having. See if you can move all those people to the bridge of the enterprise. You've got, in addition to the, like, the talking kind of gets drowned out by the Yeah, the engine noise. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 100%. So, yeah, like you, here's the thing.

Our brains are crazy and they need a lot of rest. They take up so much energy. That's it. Unfortunately, it's probably going to be more like the cargo hold when it was full of Irish people. Yeah. Oh, that terrible episode. So bad. This actually, when I can't sleep, this sound actually helps me.

I'll put it on. 100%. You could just. You could automatically do that one night. You have all the noise. Just imagine it's the enterprise, make the bass sound behind it. People fall asleep in those settings because there is always the hum. It turns into a hum, right?

So that's all. You're just helping it transfer into a hum that you're going to sleep to. But I do want to say for other folks, the reason we feel so off when we don't get enough sleep is because what happens while we're sleeping to our brains. It's like they're taking a crucial bath, a nice, chemical regenerating bath. And we are not okay if we do not sleep, right? And humans can last a long time with chronically bad sleep, but not optimally. And we die younger. Like you are, there are effects on our hearts, on our health that have absolute long-term problems, especially if we

stop breathing. So please get checked for acne if you are wondering if that is you. But there's a couple other things I just want to throw in if with this middle of the night waking is the gold standard treatment is cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia. It's called CBTI. And we've got lots of randomized controlled trials where they have worked on this and can help people improve their sleep and the timing and all sorts of things by getting you, you know, there's a whole strategy to it. So something you could look into if you're interested. Medication is. When I, Not always. The CBT, I think, like so many things came up for that.

So wow. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. So medication tends to not be our best option, but that's the American way. And so, and partly because it just keeps things, it's sort of like, well, I drink alcohol so that helps me sleep. And we absolutely know that does not give you good sleep or, you know, and it adds up and is a

problem. And most people can get that. Medication can do a lot to just sort of, you know, we need to get you sleeping. and there's value to that. But to really treat it at its source, CBTIs is our best bet. Mindfulness, we have a lot of good studies on that as well for sleep quality and basically getting that brain arousal, the cognitive arousal, the racing thoughts. It helps with that.

You're actually training your brain in the day. So at night it doesn't do the racing. And so it can be really helpful because your brain just won't disengage in the night as easily. but when you are practicing having a disengage, it can do a much better job. So that's powerful. Bobby says partner assisted CBTI has the best results for insomnia. Would you agree with that?

There we know. You got to work with your partner. Oh, 100%. Yeah. And also, and this is where like the puzzle pieces, right, if you're waking up gas giving for error and your partner can't stand you anymore because you're snoring. You know, there's a lot of factors going on, right?

But sleep hygiene, if anyone's just like, oh, I'd like to improve this a little bit. Just look up sleep hygiene steps and, you know, maybe your bedroom is too hot. Maybe your pillow sucks, you know? I saw a funny meme where I was like, man, do I relate? It's like you spend your 20s and 30s trying to make money and then your 40s and 50s trying to buy the perfect pillow. Yeah, yeah. Because your neck hurts and, you know, all this stupid things. I hate that that's a true thing, by the way, hate it.

Like once in a while, I'll be like, oh, look what I bought at the freaking thing for my feet. Like what am I? A hundred? Right. Yeah. And then here's the final one. And Brian, I'm going to give you this one. So you're going to move your yogurt up.

And then you're going to do... Move up your yogurt, right? We're going to do some stimulus and control treatment for insomnia. And what that is is basically, you know, when we are awakened in the night, we stay in our beds, right? Okay. And then we associate that awake time with stress and to-do-lis. Like we're training our brain to think this place is for going through my to do-lets, as opposed to what it should be.

Two things, remember everyone? Say it with me now. Sex and sex and sleep. Yeah. Sorry, put them in the order for now. But nothing else. And so the idea would be that, and it's one of our most difficult to do, because it's not what our brain wants us to do. It's not like, you should get up now. It doesn't do that.

It's like, let's keep thinking. Let's just keep going over some stuff. Right. So instead of lying there frustrated and watching the clock and feeling that spiral thing, what you're going to do is get out of bed at most 15 to 20 minutes after you've awakened. And then you're going to do something quiet and low light and then return when you're sleepy. So you cannot get up and go look at your phone. It needs to be you get up. to for some more Pokemon. No, no. I'm saying no to that.

Not it. Not to that. So boring, sleepy, low lit. And when you are sleepy again, like, okay, time to go to bed. Then you go back to bed. Because it's truly training your brain to think of it as a place where you think and worry and stay alert. Sure. Sure.

And then now we want to, you know, the retraining of that stimulus is that this is a place where we sleep. So maybe give that a shot and see how that goes. goes. Yeah. And if anyone needs my, my hot takes on this, go to my website actually, Know Better You.com. And Therapy 101 up at the top is a thing you can, a PDF you can pull up on how to sleep. Sort of this wakefulness thing, some tricks and techniques that have been really helpful. One is that breathing technique we all love. The square. Yeah. Well, the one there's two in your nose. Oh, the nose and then a heart cry out of your mouth and all that.

And then just how to get your brain to sort of, you know, do some different things. And anyway, there's some ideas there. That's right. Well, go check it out. You should be over there anyway. Know better you.com and keep an eye out. Sign up for all the stuff that's coming your way. So get in there.

I got a free webinar coming up in the next couple weeks that will be really fun. I hope people enjoy. It's the only time we allow the term webinar to be set on the show. I know. Is there a better word? I don't know if there is a better word. term. Because I don't like it either, but I don't know what other word.

Web-based seminar is a webinar. I mean, it's exactly a Zoom meeting. Yeah. How about a fireside chat? A fireside chat. Oh, do that. Do a fireside chat on Zoom. I love it.

I love it. Zoomified or Zoomifier. Anyway, well, Wendy, it's always a pleasure, as dad would say. And let's talk again real soon. Stay out of trouble. Bye now. Thanks. All right. Good stuff today.

stuff. That's good stuff, yeah. Hope everybody sleeps better, including our listener. Yes. A quick email from a listener, Dave and Madison says, after listening to Wednesday's, sorry, Wendy last week, oh, I forgot to play the deal. This is about the jugs of pain. He says, I wanted to remind people

that you can, quote, read the paper, unquote, without having to foot a subscription. Check out your local library. A lot of times, simple library card can give you access to a paper. Mine gives access to the New York Times. The college I work for gets me additional access to the Wall Street Journal and archived articles on all the local newspapers,

plus games, books, CDs, e-books, and a bunch of other cool stuff. Never underestimate the power of a simple library card, says Dave. That's kind of brilliant, actually. Yeah, that's smart to use it. I don't know if I've even gotten an up-to-date card. I don't know what I have. I might have some, I don't know. Kim gets books there all the time.

She does it all the time. Do they still do physical library cards, or is it all like a phone? You hold up your phone with a thing and they scan it. Good point. Maybe I haven't had one since it was an actual card. I don't know. They probably still have to offer a card, I would guess, but there's probably an app for that. Probably. Yeah. There's an app for that. There's an app for everything, Scott.

Yeah. The kids love going there. The littles when we have them. Kim goes all the time, gets her stupid fantasy lady books. It's terrible. Whatever. She has her genres and she likes them, and I'm not here to... Stuff with Fabio on the cover. Sure. Some of those. Although they're usually like, in an apocalyptic wasteland. Yeah, of course. one woman's chance to turn a guy around and you know it's all nonsense but whatever i love it she likes going there um anyway other stuff to mention real quick uh if you want to send us your own messages you can send us emails text and all that stuff uh the way to find out which one's best for you is to go to the website frogpans

dot com slash tms you'll find anything of note linked there uh core is an hour earlier today at noon today oh okay mostly because john's out of town and we don't have the restriction of his schedule and it's later for Bo, so we want to give him more time. But I'd be lying if I said it wasn't because Bo wanted more playtime with Crimson Desert today. It's coming out today. We've got to give him a wide berth. Myself, too, I want to play it too. Yeah, good news is I'll be done with Coverville before then.

So if it times up, then I can even raid back at you. Oh, yeah, very cool. That's right. A reminder if you're in the chat, we'll raid right after this. So be prepared for more content coming your way on Coverville, short time. That's right. Be ready to raid. Yes. I think that's it.

Let's get a song out the door. Sure. Fabian wrote in. Oh. Love the name Fabian. You don't need too many Fabians. I know, yeah. Which is the Spanish Fabian.

Good morning, Brian. I'm turning the not so ripe old age of 40. Oh, okay. Oh, man. Would you please play any cover of a 1986 song for me? Thank you very much. And greetings from northern Germany. Libid di Sindung denoch.

Fabian. I'm sure I said that perfectly. Great name too. So yeah, so born in 1986, wanted a cover of a 1986 song. You know, let's look at the year 1986. The biggest songs were, that's what Friends are for by Dionne Warwickan friends

with the Stevie Wonder and, yeah, I think it was horrible. Say You Say Me by Lionel Richie from White Knights. Oh, the one he just talked about on the Oscars when he got up and gave away the song. Yes, he totally did.

I miss you by Climax. I miss you. I miss you. On my own by Patty LaBelle and Michael McDonald. Oh, wow. But the fifth biggest song. The fifth, topping the Billboard year and Hot 100 singles of 1986 was a song by a band called Mr. Mr.

And that's the one I focused on because those first four, those first four, just crap. But this one is Broken Wings. And it's a great cover by. I, um, Flaw, band is called Fla, heavy rock version of Broken Wings. Did you know, Olivia Newton, John also did a cover of Broken Wings by Mr. Mr. No, I had no idea.

Yeah, yeah, I almost chose that one, but no, I figured we needed some rock. Sure. From their album revival from 2022, here is Flaw and Broken Wings. Thanks for listening. The Frog Pants Network lives at FrogPants.com. You sure there's nothing else you want to tell me? No.