The Morning Stream - TMS 3000: Trashnesia

Episode Date: April 28, 2026

Crystal Herpes. TMMMS. Absent Wife Disorder. Encyclopedia Briantannica. Mansplaining Deodorant. 3000 episodes. They Said We Shouldn't Do It. BUT WE DID! This Is The Pre-Orgy. All Friends, No Benefits. I dont like Herpeeeeeees. Alicia saves the day. And I'm Also Into Crystals! Chaos With Purpose. Fortnite Grandma. The Are Three Thousands. Dan and the Holy Grails and more on this episode of The Morning Stream. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Every once in a while, you get a bad cup of coffee or a crappy sandwich and you regret those purchases. That will never happen when you toss us your dollar. Support TMS today at patreon.com slash TMS. Very dramatic for a 3,000th show. Coming up on the morning stream, Crystal Herpes. T-M-M-M-S. Absent wife disorder. Encyclopedia Brian Tanica.

Mansplaining deodorant. 3,000 episodes. They said we shouldn't do it. But we did! This is the pre-referior. All friends, no benefits. I don't like her bees. Alicia saves the day.

And I'm also into crystals. Chaos with purpose. Fortnite grandma. There are three thousands. Dan and the Holy Grails and more on this episode of the Morning Stream. Later on nightlines, sex and violence on TV. We say we don't like it, but the ratings say we do. The morning stream, where we're going, we won't need eyes to see.

Hello everybody and welcome to TMS. This is the morning stream for April 28th, 2026 episode three. What crazy. Can you believe it, Brian? Look at that. Can you believe it? I couldn't find my TMS. I looked too. I couldn't find it either.

Yeah. I know I've got it. I just don't know. Somewhere in the Frogent Studios, the frog. The old frog. The old frog. The original frog. Yeah, that one served me well for a long, long time. Yeah. No, that's a great way to celebrate.

Guys, it's the episode you've all been waiting for since episode one. It's 3,000. They said it couldn't be done, but we did it. Yeah. We spend, we spend, how many years has been? I don't even know. 2011. 2011 January, right?

Yep. So what are we at? 20, no. I'm sorry. 15 years and three months. That's crazy. Yeah. Do you know how many kids?

Yeah. This is my brain immediately worked. Do you know how many kids have gone to gone to high school? They're almost learning how to drive. They've gone to high school and left high school. Yeah. Like more than five times?

No, more than, wait, how's it work? Depends on if it's a lot. four-year high school or a three-year high school. That's a good point. And some people do special academies and private schools. And so this is a terrible example. But welcome to 3,000. We're glad to be here.

Glad you're all here. I watched 3,000 miles to Graceland last night to celebrate. Did you it to celebrate? That was your way of celebrating? No, actually, honestly, I was going to try to like cram something that had 3,000 in it. It turns out, it's like the only movie I could find. And it's also not streaming anywhere easy. And I was like, oh, forget.

at as a dump. That's really funny. That's dedication. I can't, you know, I'll listen to a song that's got 3,000 in the title. I don't think I'll commit two hours to watch a movie just because it's got 3,000 in it. Mr. 3,000 with Bernie Mac and Angela Bassett. Oh, I miss that

one. I like Bernie Mac. Yeah, it was baseball, wasn't it? Oh. That was baseball thing? Yeah. Yeah, there it is. Aging baseball star who goes by the nickname Mr. 3,000, finds out many years after retirement that he didn't quite reach 3,000 hits.

Wow. Now at age 4070's back to try and reach that goal. I mean, I'm never heard of this. I'm guessing this was not well received. Let's see. Let's see. 5.6 out of 10 on IMDB. It's not great.

Not the worst, but also, you know, not the best. I like all those, I like the people you mentioned. I like Angela Bassett and Bernie Mac. I'm a big fan. Paul Sorvino's in there. He's a film. He's a film, he's a film sack fan. He is a film sack fan.

I've got a photo of him holding up the things. Well, if the photos to be believed he's a film sack fan. Yeah, he really held that, but I don't think he had any idea. No, the photographer who took that is a film sack fan. Was that Velvet Lip or was that somebody else? I think that is Velvet Lip. And I think his real name is, oh, he's going to, if I get this wrong, I think his name is Eric, not his full name. I just, I think his name is Eric.

And he did the most amazing shoots in 2014 was the year. He came and did all these black and white hit shots and all this stuff. It's amazing. If I wasn't like 30 pounds ago in that photo, I'd still use it for stuff. See, the problem with that one is that for Frog Pants All-Stars, I shaved my beard. So I had just the game show mustache. And so in that, yeah. I forgot about that.

Okay. Yeah. So the beard, because it was darker then. It was as dark as my mustache is now. Yeah. But I shaved it off to kind of do the whole like 70s game show hose. and so in the photo you find I'm doing this covering up where the beard was.

That's right. You would do you strike a pose. I did. Yes, I totally did. I've got those somewhere. I don't know where I was going to pull one up. Well, anyway, huge shout out to us for 3,000 of these bastards. Huge pat on the back to us. Yeah. Look what we've done. Yeah. We're happy. We're proud of it.

Also, we're just going to make you a show. Now, there is some special stuff. toward the end of the show. I've previewed none of it. I just know the order I'm meant to do it all in. Oh, good. Okay, because he gave me... He gave you instructions as well?

As Jamie is want to do. Yeah. He is, uh, yes. I think he's even told... I think he, well, Amy, because Amy told us too, a bunch of details about how we should do it. Yes, I think he's instilled a lot of backup protocols with this one.

Yeah. Yeah. Two things. Make sure you guys read the little message in the folder before you air the special. I named it so. Scott will remember, hopefully. After the special airs, there's a folder in Scott's a mashup folder, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Yeah, yeah. Which I have not, I've got it all like staged locally. You got it all downloaded. You've not opened. No. But apparently there's something pretty special in here. He says he's worked on it for like six months, like, or maybe longer. I don't know.

Wow. Yeah, so I don't know what to expect. I mean, we've worked on it for 11 years or 15 years, but okay. Yeah. Six months. That's fine. Whatever. Yeah.

Fancy time. you put in, just kidding. We kid, we joke. Anyway, that's all coming up. A little bit later in the show. Also, I think I have a particular disorder when my wife leaves town. In addition to the others I've expressed on the show, I have a new disorder I've discovered. Okay.

And that's this. When Kim is gone, which she is currently in Mississippi until next Monday or whatever it is, when she's here, somehow the way we work, we have a good team. kind of mentality where if one of us doesn't check to make sure we got trash out on trash day

like the night before the other one will almost always see it or remember or pick up the slack it's just the way it works so if she she's busy doing something I'll be going oh we didn't do trash yet and if for some reason I'm swamped she will always remember oh yes it's trash day tomorrow

and so the cans get put out there just automatically yeah which is super cool yeah yeah works out great today's trash day so yesterday, I says it to myself, I says, you got to remember to take the trash out and not only that, get the trash in the basement out, because I've, I've been compiling here for too long. I skipped last day, the last one, because I had only half a can full and now it's full. So it's like, well, I need to get this out there. You can't get away with that. Yeah, you've got to get it out. Yeah, you've got like a pizza box in here or something jammed in there. Or there was. So I go, so I was thinking about that during the day. But then I got bunged up doing some other stuff. And I, I, went to sleep, forgot all about it. Didn't check.

Just didn't, just didn't, just completely forgot. This morning at 6 a.m. or something. Which is between that and about 6.30s when I'm getting up anyway. Okay. I hear I hear the trucks.

I hear the trucks. And I wake up in a cold sweat going, I don't think I took out the try. You know, I'm like losing my shit. So I scramble out of bed. Yeah. Throw on a robe, which I'd never wear a robe.

No, but this is such the visual of like robe. Not sandals. What's the word? Slippers that don't have a heel. Yeah, kind of. Maybe one slipper. The other slipper you can't find. Yeah.

Honestly, I was just bumping and, you know, grinding my way through the thing. And I can hear it out there. And I'm like, is it two doors down? Is it been here? Like, I don't know where the, I'm trying to. like geolocate the truck in my head with the hearing and I'm panicking and I run out there and the dogs hear me and they're like I'm like shut up I'm just trying to check the trash and I open the garage and I run out the back and I'm standing there in my disheveled state and there

there are our cans placed there perfectly did you remember Alicia did it freaking Alicia did it she's not even my kid and she's that toward the end of the night went oh we really ought to get the trash out. See, I'm the worst. Like, it's Carter and Alicia really who are the saviors when Kim's out of town. So when they're gone too. Yeah. It's even worse. Oh, I'm hosed when they're gone. And they were gone over the weekend. They did like an adult friend sleepover thing with their friends. And it sounds dirty. It's not. It does. Just that it's called an adult friend's sleepover. It just feels like it's. It really does. I don't know why I call it that. Some sort of benefits. I should just say they stayed at their friends at overnight. And because that's,

That's all they do is sit. They'll watch anime. They'll draw and be nerds. Yeah. But when I describe it to people, where were they? Oh, they went overnight somewhere. It all sounds skeevy. It's not, though.

It's not at all. But anyway, yeah. I drove a guy the other day who, um, uh, talked about going to adult friend's sleepovers all the time. And he really did mean orgies. Oh my gosh. Yeah. So Sunday morning before TMS.

Like I would, I woke up at at four o'clock in the morning, three o'clock in the morning. I can remember what it was. but I know I know that I was, I maybe got four hours of sleep the night before. Not a lot. Not a lot. So I'm like, I'll just, you know, there's light, there's daylight out there. I'm going to go do some driving, go do some Ubering.

So we hop in the car. First ride I get is about two or three miles west of me in a town called Golden. That's where Coors beer is made. Oh, yeah. Or where it originated anyway. And pick up a guy and immediately the smell of like he's been rolling around

in a brewery hits me. And he is, he's clearly, he's drunk, but he's, he's able to, you know, speak clearly and not, not a little bit of slurring, but enough slurring that I can tell he's drunk,

but not so much that I'm like, dude, I think I don't want you in my car. So we've got about a 20 minute ride ahead of us and I'm just, you know, listening to any signs of the whole like, you know that sound so like get to the side of the road and open the window

but but you know he's telling me he's like yeah you know just all the different places my life is going and and I'm taking over my dad's company and he fights for people who can't get insurance or who you're fighting against

insurance companies that's really noble work you probably feel really good about doing that yeah and then I'm also into crystals oh okay cool that's good too. Don't tell your dad about and so he doesn't give you the keys to the business.

Holy shit. Exactly. Yeah. Well, he's taking over because his dad passed away. Oh, oh, gotcha.

All right. But I'm like, oh, well, crystals, that's cool. He's like, you know,

I've lived with, you know, I've done a lot of things in my life. Um, and he's a young kid. He's like, I would have said maybe mid-20s, you know,

and he's talking about all over now. Exactly. And he's like, you know, went to a lot of orgies. and there was and there was it was clear there was even a little bit of hitting on me at one point like I just I really like your energy you got such good energy and do you want to come to us to our next party exactly come to the next party and I'm like oh you know you know sometimes my wife tells me I've got too much energy

and it's like defleck right up there so He's like, yeah, I've been in a lot of orgies and got herpes. And so that's what I've got to tell people from now on when, you know, like, oh, okay. Got to tell people. Yeah. Because you can't, because clearly you can't alter your lifestyle a little bit and maybe not go to orgies. Maybe not go to orgies, I guess. And, you know, he continues on, like, but I don't know why I feel just really comfortable talking to you.

You've got some, you just got some real positive energy going, man. And I'm like, oh, thanks. He's like, I'm going to give you a crystal. I'm like, oh, well, poor, you don't have to do that. He's like, oh, no, I totally am. Have you heard of Auralite 23? I'm like, no, Rolite 23. I didn't see the first 22 Rolites.

Am I going to be able to understand what's going on in the 23rd one? Yeah. No, apparently it's this amethyst, this rare amethyst that he claims. Oh, here we go. if you if you hold the amethyst and you um you just think positive thoughts and you focus them into that amethyst yeah then uh it heats up oh okay and i'm thinking and i'm thinking yeah it's heating up because i'm holding the amethyst with both hands yeah that checks out that's that's what's making it heat up but sure enough we get you know i take him to uh to the drop off point he's like can you wait can you

wait like 30 seconds. Like, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, no worries. He can wait 30 seconds. He gets out of the car. Pugh! No, I'm just kidding. He just runs. No, I meant me.

Oh, oh, oh, oh. Got it. He runs into his house, comes back and he's got, you know, I was thinking like this little tiny, like, Khyber crystal size thing. No, it's like a big old purple clear rock. Really? And, yeah. Is it an actual amethyst?

An actual... I don't know. I mean, it could be or it could be a... I've got it upstairs. I should bring it down. Resin deal. Yeah, no, it's definitely a rock. People are like, do you have it within the show?

If you give me, can you give me? Absolutely, I can give you. 25 seconds. 100%. I'm going to give you the same time he gave, you gave him. So Brian's going to run. He's going to do a 30 second jog upstairs.

He's going to grab that thing, and we're going to witness this. In fact, if this whole, if the technology is, if the capability of this rock is to be believed, Brian should be able to hold that up to the screen, to the camera. And we all, as a unit here, as a group, as a live viewing audience. And maybe even if the home audience wishes hard enough, we're all going to see the effect of this together. And maybe it'll get really hot. That's right.

They'll be able to focus their positive energy into this rock. Yeah. All right. Here is the. Oh, yeah. That's like a real, that's a, like, in school when you get your geodes and whatever. Right. I mean, it is, you know, it's purple.

It's transparent in places. It's like the soulstone and Diablo where Diablo's soul is. I think I had to kill Black Widow to get this thing. It was her Hawkeye. I tried to hit Hawkeye with a snow plow. It didn't work. So I just, yeah. Yeah.

But, you know, so he ran in and brought this back out. And I'm like, dude, thank you very much. And then I got the hell out. Yeah, weird, man. No, but it was really nice of him. He was a super nice guy. Oh, he sounds great. Like, he's hippie-dippy, he's about to run a business.

He's drunk off his ass, and he can't stop going to orgies. I think he sounds like, he's probably a fun guy. Real fun guy. Unrelated question, can you get herpes from holding a crystal that somebody with herpes gave you? Yes, they explored this in the dark crystal, and that's what happened. That's what made the Skexas. Yeah. That's why they were going, hmm.

all day because they were effed. That's right. They're playing cream. That's great. I would keep that forever. I think that's awesome. I will. But it's, you know, it may not be an Auralite 23 or amethyst, but it is a very pretty rock. Yeah. How does one, okay, separate question. I do have a, I have a geologist next door, a rock hound who has his own rock hound's door. Oh, you should go, you should ask him just to evaluate it. I should ask him, but I've got to do it. I'm not going to say, hey, one of my passengers gave me this rock. Is it, is it any good? I think it would be funny

if he goes, I've done some testing and it turns out you've got a hippos gallstone or something like that. Right. This is this is a petrified penguin urine. Yep, the best kind. So I got to, here would be my follow-on question. How does this guy in like

his 20s? How does one, I know there's ways. I just don't know how you do this where you go. How does one go? to orgy. Yeah. How does one find out where they're happening? Is it a secret little society? Do you have to sign up somewhere? Like, what do you do you think? I would bet that if you are the type of person who wants to find an orgy, you can

probably find an orgy. All right. No, no, no. I like that. I think that you and I probably would not be able to do it. But I think that that somebody with the wherewithal that's like, you know, I think I want to find an orgy that you'd be able to, like, Without too much effort, imagine there's probably a subreddit. Oh, gotta be, right?

Like, you know, find one in your area and then you start there. I think Craigslist still the hot place to use your setups. Has they changed their interface or their design at all? It's just the most amazing, like, we're gonna plant our flag and never move. Yeah, never move. And I don't know, maybe that's benefited them somehow, but also, as far as I know, nobody's using Craigslist for like really cool, I have this, does anyone need it?

That's all gone to Facebook marketplace and eBay and things. I think all it is now is honestly just like, hey, we're going to have a midnight F party at the Hilton. Right, right. I mean, I know the, I know exactly where the Swingers Club is,

because I also took somebody there in the Uber. Sweet. The Skirl Ranch. And, uh, squirrel ranch. Squirrel Ranch. The Squirrel Ranch, yeah, is what it's called. Love it.

Love it. It seems, it just seems like it's not such a subtle name. No, not really. What's that one in, oh, Bunny Ranch is one I'm thinking. Bunny Ranch, yeah. And that's, uh, that's the legal one in Vegas. That's the legal brothel. Yeah, aren't too many of those anymore.

The one with Air Force Amy and one of my favorite clips ever on the soup was, uh, Air Force Amy testifying in court for something. and you know the judge says man how do you go from from because she was an actual air force oh soldier i figured it's because she got it on with a lot of air force guys a lot of airmen yeah no she's actually the air force and then but now she works in a brothel and the the judge says i don't get it how do you go from the air force to the bunny ranch and she says well there's a couple different ways you can start on i-95 and take that south and she's dead serious and it's like one of the best clips i ever saw on uh i missed that's not a show anymore right the super

no no internet kind of killed that right like it's it's uh you find those things on the internet now and it's a bummer because i like it like them all in one place yeah the only place it gets to really do that anymore and then they kind of keep it with politics is like john stewart a little bit of Oliver. Yeah. Yeah. It's that kind. It's less about talk shows and more about. Exactly. But you kind of get that in the interstitials on John Oliver. The, and now this. And then you kind of get some stuff that you'd normally see on the soup. Yeah. Speaking of which, if you haven't seen John Stewart's segment about the attempted, the guy running through the White House correspondence. And everything. If you haven't seen that yet, that is a John Stewart master class. Really? Okay. It reminded me I just went, once in a while you guys. to be reminded just how good he is at what he does.

And it's easy to take him for granted. And that is one of the most like, it's, it's perfect. It's actually perfect. Really? Okay. You all need to seek it up after the show today. I'm going to watch that. Seek it out. I was dying.

Happy 3,000, everybody. If you feel in generous, why don't you hop over to the website and pick up a new mug? That's right. We're commemorating 3,000 episodes plus. In fact, that's what it literally says on. the mug. 3,000 plus. 3,000 plus, because we knew we wouldn't stop.

There will be a show tomorrow. Oh, yeah, there'll be a show tomorrow. There'll be a 3,000. We'll be on Thursday. So we're going to stop at 3,001, but there will be a show tomorrow. Yeah, in the year 3,001. Anyway, go check it out. It is our commemorative mug.

If you've been collecting them all, well, you should get in there. Get that and get it reserved because once they're gone, they are gone. Frogpants.com. That's it. All right, we're going to do some quick news. And then a little bit later, we got to. Dan joining us, so gear up for that. But here's the news.

It's the news and it's brought to you by. Brought to you by Daily Music Headlines. Today we found out, Scott, on Daily Music Headlines, that William Shatner, 95 years old, is coming out with a new heavy metal album. With, uh, nobody loves him. Nobody, nobody helps him.

Really? Mr. Tamborine man. Is he covering or is he, what's, Do you know? That's the one thing we don't know. But Rob Halford is joining him on this one. There were a couple other names. That was the one that I remember.

Hold on. Let me pull it up. I think Alford's friends with Sulu, isn't he? Maybe they can mend that wound. John Moyer and Dave Lombardo are also joining him for this one. does not say whether or not it is going to be covers or originals, I have to believe that it's going to be covers

because that is... It's also what I want. I want covers. Yeah, yeah, exactly. I don't want original music from Alford and Shatner. No. But that's a great law firm. The law firm of Alford and Shatner. Alfred and Shatner.

Have you been injured in a space-related accident? Yeah. Oh, Jesus. It writes itself these commercials. It really does. Focus is a spoken word intensity over massive guitars and is expected to be released in 2026. The project featuring covers a Black Sabbath and Iron Maiden. So there we go.

Wow. There you go then. So we could hear war pigs. Zach Wilde. Richie Blackmore, Henry Rollins. Wow. Described as, quote, chaos with purpose. Yeah.

I mean, that's kind of our lives, right? It has no firm release date, but it's slated for 2026. So there you go. I'm in. I'm into it. Watch for it this year. The biggest album drop of the year. All that and more, DailyHipmusikheadlines.com.

Sub and get in there. Yeah. Quick news story for you here. Welfare check on an elderly resident leads Westlake Police to a big surprise. Uh-oh. They thought they were going to find her, you know, in the great beyond. They thought she had passed. Right, right.

I mean, that's the whole. like welfare check is like, oh no, we haven't heard from this person in a while. So, yeah, yeah. Uh, yes, this is Ohio, West Lake Ohio. There you go. My daughter, my daughters went to Westlake high school. And it's a big joke in the house because anytime, I used to make fun of it because it was a brand new school and it was in Utah County.

And I used to have a lot of stereotypes about how dumb people in Utah County are. And, uh, it's, it's not very nice because there's plenty of really nice people, great people in Utah County. But there's just a general vibe of like, Drup. And so when they were going to Westlake, I used to make fun of it because it was a brand new school. I'm like, these teachers are like barely teachers. Like, who are these people? So then all these years later, anytime the girls get something wrong factually or just a small math problem or anything in life, things I do all day.

Right? Just anything. Yeah. And I'll go Westlick. Yep. That's all you have to say is just Westlake. Yeah. I go Westlick.

And they get so annoyed with me. They just hate it. That's awesome. They always, they laugh, but, you know, I have to use it in moderation. Yeah. Anyway, this welfare check on a 91-year-old Westlake woman ended with a discovery you'd never expect. Everyone got a good laugh, says Westlake Police Captain Jerry Vogel. The woman is part of the, sorry, is part of the city's Are You Okay program?

Oh, named after the song by Was Not Was. Oh, see, I knew you were going to have one. You always have one. Yeah. Brian's like, why isn't there a Bryatanica? No. Encyclopedia Brian Tanica. Yeah.

The music encyclopedia Brian Tanica.com. Perfect. Why don't I have that domain? Because nobody would be able to pronounce it. No, it's too long anyway. Yeah. But anyway, the woman's part of this deal. The program allows residents to sign up for a daily phone call to check in and make sure everything's okay.

But on Thursday, the woman whose name was not released did not answer the call. So kick it into gear here. You got to go check on her. When dispatchers and the woman's daughter followed up, They couldn't reach her either. Everybody's a little alarm that she's missing these contacts. Anyway, they get to the house. There is so much set up in this thing before you actually get to the thing.

I didn't even read it until a second ago. Like I found the punchline. Yeah, the cops get there. The officer says, calls and says, we're here with her. And again, this article is making you think, well, what happened? Oh, is she alive? Is she dead? What's going on?

She's playing video games in her bedroom. Awesome. the whole time. Do we know? It doesn't say what game. That pisses me off because crucial detail. What is grandma into? Is she playing Fortnite? Is she just diabloing around?

Like, what is she up to? I would bet it's Animal Cross singers or Pocopia or something. Like something, you know, just I can't put it down. Oh, I need to do. Oh, I'd better create a windmill and have some water flowing down so I can power the windmill before I go tonight. It says the woman was fine, but missing the calls because she was trying to beat her. record in a video game. That narrows it down a little bit to something that's score-based.

A little bit. Something with a record, yeah. I have no idea, though. There's leaderboards for everything. Could be any game. That's true. Yeah. So I don't know, but that's your, you had one job, who is this, News 5, Cleveland. Right. Find out what game she's playing.

What game was it? Yeah. Really obnoxious. Anyway, she's okay, and that's the important thing. That's good. Final story, and then we'll bring Dan in here. a nature festival has urged attendees to dress appropriately after being mistaken for a nudist event. That's what I thought immediately when I saw the name Nature Festival. Like I thought, okay, here's, this is the pre-orgy.

Like this is, you know, this is where you go to find out where the actual orgy is going to be. Yeah, they pre-game at this event or whatever. Actually, is pre-gaming a terrible thing to say? I don't actually know when people say pre-game. No, because pre-gaming is when you drink. alcohol at your house before you go out because it's cheaper to have a drink at your house before you go out. Which is based on the idea of you you get to a parking lot at an action, like a football

game and then you tailgate and get drunk. That's where that comes from, right? Yeah. Yeah. Now, pre-gaming for an orgy would probably mean cleaning the pipes. Ah, or run into the, uh, run into the, uh, these pipes are clean. Get him. I don't know how that works.

I don't go to orgies. I have no idea. But anyway, this UK Wildlife Festival happened in the UK has clarified that it's not a nudist gathering after confusion led some people to believe that it was a nudist, or sorry, it was a naturalist event.

Cumbria Nat, Nature Festival. I'm just going to pause there and say that's a terrible name for your potential nude. Yeah, I just don't like that. Well, Cumbria is the name of the town. I just don't like the first three letters. Yeah, nature. Yeah, sure.

Cumbria. Sounds like a bunch of naked. I would think it's a I think it's, that also adds to the nudist festival. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. They got to, they got to tweak that shit. Anyway, inquiries suggested attendees had misunderstood the event's purpose, prompting organizers to step in before things got awkward.

In a Facebook post addressing the confusion, Cumbria Natural, sorry, nature festival made it clear that the event is focused on wildlife and conservation, not nudism. Well, who were we, but not natural naked people? Why can't I dress naturally for your name? nature event. My birthday suit.

Yeah. Man, that took me as a kid the longest time to understand what that meant. Your birthday suit. Years. It took me years. I know this is going to shock anybody, but. No, it doesn't have shock to me. There were people that were like, as a kid, you hear like, oh, and he was in his birthday

suit. And I'm like, I didn't get one of those. Yeah. What year? Which birthday do you get the suit on? Yeah, this is some bullshit. Your first one. Well, anyway, I guess.

I guess they saved the day because there were people lined up to show up in the buck. Fantastic. Yeah. I love it. I love that it's like, like, here's a better send an email out to everybody because somebody asked if, you know, if condoms will be supply. Yeah. Like it's, you just never know. So safety first.

Everybody. I've never been to anything even remotely like that. Like a. No. Come here naked. I don't know how people do it. Bondi beat, like Australia, Bondi Beach was the,

the only place I've been where there were just nude people walking around in public. Just, just walking around. Really chill about it. I take that back. There was a beach in Miami, when I went to the Miami Herald, I booked an entire weekend before it.

Tina and I went ahead of time. And we were on a clothing optional beach that was not like, marked as such and not fenced off. Yeah. Just, just come on out to the beach. Lay out your beach chair or your towel or whatever. Take everything off and there you go.

Yeah, no tan lines here. And I'll tell you this. The people at Bondi looked a lot better than the people in Miami. I'm shocked. Shocked to hear this news. Yeah, I mean, it's freaking like, you know, El McPherson's and Hugh Jackman's walking around over on Bondi Beach. And over in Miami, it's like Ethel's and, and Normans.

Yeah. Just, you know. Sorry, Tom Norm. Yeah, not to drag his name through the mud. There's already enough norm problems. Yeah. Although I miss Norm McDonald a lot. Oh, I miss Norm McDonald too.

Sure. It's a sad day. Wouldn't want to seem naked, though. No, no, no, no. Well, there was a time in his life, maybe. If you had to, I'm saying. Yeah. I wouldn't want it.

But the thing about Bondi, The thing about a nude beach like that is it's more stressful because, you know, regular beach, you can just kind of sit back and relax and wherever your, your, your eyes wander is fine. But at a nude beach, you're like, oh, a naked person. Oh, a naked person there. It's like you're trying not to be the guy who's like ogling. And it's more stressful.

Yeah. Than being at a regular beach. Yeah, totally agree. Yeah. I don't know why. even if you're not, I don't, I think even if you're just like, hey man, whatever, man, let it. Yeah. Whatever.

You still can't help it. You're still going to be like, nude, nude, nude, not nude, nude, nude. Right. Shorts. No shorts. There's a little patch right to the water that I can look at and not be looking at anybody. Not that I don't want to look, but I just don't feel like I should be looking, even though they're out there walking around naked.

Why can't I look? But I shouldn't look. So I'm going to focus on that little patch that I can see is just dead ahead of me. Yeah. So this is good advice, though, about your Miami thing. I'm going to avoid that. Avoid that beach. Yeah.

I'll give you a map. Thank you. Much appreciated. It's on South Beach, just south of the, oh, what is the, we stayed at one of the best hotels on South Beach, or one of the best, but the iconic art decoey looking hotels on South Beach. Kind of like you do birdcage style stuff like that. Yes. Yes. With the pink and the stucco and, and, and, I'm.

all that stuff. Gene Eon lights everywhere. Gene Hackman trying to sneak out. Pretty much. And a dress. Fantastic. I love that movie. All right.

Yeah. Guys, it's time for getting the table out, laying out some stuff, getting your chits in order. It's this. Here's a tangent for him. Be careful. May he cause drowsiness. Look who it is, everybody. It's Dan Patrice joining us on the phone.

Hello, Dan. Greetings programs. How's a going? I just sitting here, as always, nude after doing a pregame of. of a shot, a shot of Jack and of Niagara, so I hope I'm ready to go. Excellent. And playing video games, right? And playing video games.

Trying to be my high score at a minesweeper. Nice. Perfect. Excellent. And you have access to all, this is so funny. Do people assume because you are in the pharmaceutical industry that you just have access to, you got some giant thing at home full up whatever you need? Do you bring your work home with you?

Yeah. So there's two things that I get all the time. So the first thing everybody always says. And there's even t-shirts about this. So they find out that you're a gamer. They're like, oh, like Monopoly. That's the first thing you hear all the time. And then the second thing I hear all the time is, oh, your pharmacist, can I get some Viagra?

Exactly. Yeah, so I just sit around with my oxycontin and Viagra at home. But I haven't even touched a medication in probably about six years myself. Oh, nice. This is what I do now. So you're not pre-game. I mean, as far as work goes, you know, I had to take some of my appropriate the other day for headache. But yeah, I mean, I don't take, you know, I don't even like count to or dispense anything

anymore for a long time. Doing the hard stuff. I'd be driven. Exactly. Well, it's a good day of here, man. We're going to talk, of course, about some board games and stuff. Because why the heck not? I, um, last time you had this awesome list of stuff in one of those games, oh, now I forgot which one. Anyway, I had somebody reach out and tell me they played one of your, uh, one of those games on the list. It wasn't the Elder Scrolls game, but it was like one of your top five last year. And I can't remember what it was. But anyway, I wanted to pass on this person was like so, they were so happy with that game. They were like, I can't believe how well this fit us.

If I hadn't heard Dan say it, I'd have no idea this one even existed. Please pass on my thanks. So there you go. You know, there's different things in the world. Like you can download my show a million times, but it doesn't compare to one person saying how they appreciated something you told them to buy or you got into games. because of something you said, that that makes you feel so much better. I agree. I mean, you guys, I mean, this is a pretty new show you guys are doing here, right?

So, I mean, you'll feel that soon, I'm sure. Yeah, I mean, I need to experience something like that in the future. Yeah. I mean, this is just the first of what? Maybe, maybe we'll get to $3,000 one day. We don't know. Maybe. I mean, geez, we have to make it past the first 10 before we like pod faders.

Yeah, that's the, you know, that one spot that get past 10 and you're good. Yeah. Yeah. And we were looking at the stats. We were talking about the stats yesterday, and it was crazy. By doing just 50 of these, we had already secured our permanent spot in the top percentile of all podcasts. Because most shows, most don't get past that many.

They just never do. So you're in that boat, Dan. Half the people that listen to us who do shows and stuff, they're all in the top high percentile. Like, look at us. Carrying the banner. Planting that flag. Take that, Adam Curry.

F off. Congratulations. boys, it's really pretty awesome the achievement. I mean, obviously you guys have done millions of shows and Brian, you're one of the first podcasters ever. I mean, you and Scott, like, pioneers of the genre. Scott, too. Yeah, pretty early.

Oh, yeah, you both of you guys. This Doom thing, yeah. Yeah. Or, whatever. Unreal. Yeah. Well, it's funny because we started the Geek All-Stars back in 2011, around, you know, same time. And I'm only up to almost 300, but, you know, we only do

it every three weeks or so. But still, like, back then there were a single digit shows doing board game podcast. Now you can throw a rock in my neighborhood and probably hit three of them. That's how the wild stuff was. When we started the instance, we were like one of three, half the reason I started because I didn't like the other ones. And then now, or shortly after that, it was like, like he said, throw a rock hit 50 of them.

It's insane how that stuff worked. But here we are in the future, the far-flung future with 10,000 plus hours behind us, which means we're experts. and Dan is the expert on board gaming. What should I be playing this weekend, man? So I figured I would, it's not necessarily this weekend. I just wanted to bring up some of the hotnesses. So being such a monumental episode,

I was trying to think of one of the grail games of all time where people talk about grail games. Scott, do you know what a grail game is? Obviously, you probably know it. I assume like when you say that, you mean like, oh, you mean, are you talking about the actual like fall of Avalon, the tainted grail? No, no, I'm talking about.

talking about a game that you just, you know, board games, I mean, video games are different because, I mean, all you got to do is download something, but board games, you actually have to find them. The grail games are ones that you've been looking for a copy of this game. It's the holy grail of games. I get it. So less about something in the game being grail is your own quest.

Got it. Exactly. Yeah. So, I mean, to my defense, by the way, those tainted grill people do have a tabletop game, and it's really good. It is amazing. Actually, I don't know if I put it. I think it was an honorable mention. I probably didn't mention it because it's been a couple years. That tainted Grail, Kings of Ruin

is so damn good. I've heard amazing things, yeah. Anyway, so like a big grail game for just about everybody was a little known game, which is hugely popular now, but back then, they put out Star Wars to Queens Gambit. It did, it was

whoever freaking did it. Like Rob Davio is one of the creators. It was Avon Hill and Hasbro. So it's a Hasbro game that you could get pretty much anywhere like at mass market but didn't last very long but it was freaking amazing it was way way way before it's time you're actually fighting it's based on episode one which it was probably the game itself was probably better than episode one yeah but you had wouldn't be hard yeah exactly you had multi-use cards you're fighting on multiple you're only using a certain amount of actions per turn and you're you know the the light side versus the

dark side. You know, you're fighting like a Gungan war. You're fighting a war in space with Anakin. You're trying to get up to the Queen's throne room in a multi-layer kind of board. Yeah, it looks like a 3D chess looking forward. Yeah. It is. Oh, yeah. And you've got to go up the different levels to try and get into it. And then you actually had a, you know, Maul versus Obi-1 and Quigon in another arena. So you're fighting on all these different arenas. It was so far ahead of its time. I don't know why it didn't go just crazy. But a copy of this, you have this game now, it's about a thousand bucks if you can if you got a copy of this. Holy shit. Do people actually pay that? I mean, oh yeah. Jeez. It's crazy. Have you seen it and

played it? I own, well, I would say I own it, but I owned it. So when I moved out of my, when I got married and moved out of my buddy's house, he then shortly after got married and moved away and put some of the stuff in storage and it disappeared. I don't know. I don't know if he left that at his house when he rented it out. And then whoever, you know, rented the house, ended up taking it with them or what. But it's one of those things that it's like,

oh, and I actually, I loved it back then. That's why I bought it, and it was just such a cool game. But our good friends at Restoration Games are bringing like they do.

Restoration Games is known for bringing back. They did Dark Tower. Dark Tower, yeah. Yeah, right. They're known for bringing back older games and kind of giving the restoration treatment. They're bringing this back

as the Lord of the Rings, the King's Gambit. Oh, and it's going to be... Another IP. Interesting. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Well, and for whatever reason, now this doesn't take anything away from the game, but this IP is everywhere now. Like, it is, I don't know if somebody got the keys of the castle and was been like, and you get to the IP, and you have the Lord of the Rings, and you have the IP. Everybody has a piece of the IP now. But this is going to be really good because, I mean, between Rob Davio, Justin Jacobson and the rest of the restoration crew,

they will do this justice because you're going to be fighting all over between Miris Terent. You're going to get with the Harajoran at the Great Port, and joining a fight there. You're going to be Afrodo and Sam are navigating through Mordor to get to Mount Doom. You're going to have all these different places. It's going to be amazing.

Man, I can't wait to say, this will be out sometime when it's show. I don't have the exact date of when it'll be on Kickstarter. I think they might have, I didn't go to their main page. I know they probably get all the announcements. I'm going to have Justin on the show tomorrow night.

He's a good buddy of ours on the show. He's on the geek all stars all the time. So tomorrow night we'll be talking him extensively about it, so I'll get a lot more information. So it's Lord of the Rings, the King's Gambit. It's expected 2027. It says on Borgaine Geek, that could change, I suppose.

Yeah, well, I mean, when you're talking about, I mean, I'm sure since they know this is going to be printing money, they probably, they might already have it in production, like games like this and companies like this, they have things already in pre-production, just knowing that, I mean, this is going to be a million dollars. I mean, I would guess within the first day, maybe even a first three hours, they'll hit a million

dollars on Kickstarter. So you may, you press, you know, you press the print button pretty quick when you know that it's going to do stuff like that. And then depending on, you know, if they have to change the specs of anything, or just depending on what that is, the production will be going. You know, you don't know what kind of delays. And then you don't know what kind of port delays, you know, the boats coming back over here from China, you know, when that will happen. So you're really, I would say my, you know, this is just inside baseball educated guess would be, I don't know anything. I haven't talked to Justin

yet, but my guess would be 2027 would be a stretch by the end of 2027 just to get it fulfilled over, you know, made, product, produced, made on a boat over here, and then to everybody, if it gets everybody into 2027, I would think that would be a logistical miracle. Back when I printed dungeon murder, we were going to do it in China, and that was about the time a bunch of weird strikes and stuff. No, it was tariffs on cards, and it was specifically on card games and like entertainment-type manufacturing cards and board games. Do you know if some of that stuff still, like, gnarly?

Are prices up because of that for international production? It's not quite as gnarly as what it is. I have to ask a few of my publishers, because it was pretty gnarly for a while, and then it kind of went back down to what it had been in years past. Cards are for card games. That's one of the things that you can actually do in the U.S. and Canada fairly affordably. What we had to do, because it went from like super cheap in China to about the same. And I'm like, well, why don't we just, we'll just do it in the States then?

and that's what we did. Yeah. Yeah. And you avoid a lot of those prices. It's just the production scale and the price of goods is just not as easy to do. Now, I've seen, like I've talked to, I know a lot of the publishers or the people who produced the manufacturers from China. I've met with a lot of them over the years at Gen Con and stuff. And I've seen videos of their factory.

Now, this is, it's not like stereotypical what you would think of, you know, little kids doing this stuff in China. These are just some absolute top-notch, just how they have their production facilities is just an amazing marvel in what they can do and the price of goods that they can get from other places in Asia as far as get the wood, the resin, dice, everything else. Like there are things you can find here, but just the production scale and getting it all together, you just can't beat what they're able to do in China. It's amazing. Yeah, no, it's good to hear. It was kind of gnarly there for a minute. I know, so glad to hear that's a little better. What else you got on this list of Grails?

Another one of these things, you know, and kind of speaking of a newer, kind of the new hotness or a game coming from another game. Now, I don't know if you guys are huge readers or audiobooks or anything like that. One of the big hotness is this dungeon crawler Carl, which is kind of freaking everywhere. I don't, I mean, I don't read as much as I should

because if I'm going to spend time reading, I might as well play a video game. You may as well read, read the rules. Yeah, or PC, NBC chat or something like that. Yeah, and I feel it's hard lately. But I read the first book, Brian, you're into the second already? No, I'm still. I started over with the audiobook because I was about halfway through the printed or the Kindle book,

and I'm like, the audiobook is so great. I'm just going to start over. And I use that as my incentive to get on the bike. The only time I allow myself to listen to the audiobook is when I'm on the bike. Gotcha. That's a great idea. I ride more often and I ride for longer because I'm listening to and I don't want to stop. No, that's great.

Yeah, no, it's a legit phenomenon that thing. It really is. Massive. So John DeClair, who one of my favorite designers, we've had him on a show a bunch of times, he does a lot of the crafting system. He's the guy who did Mystic Vale, if you remember that, with the kind of the transparency. He's putting into cards and doing that. So he brings that to a lot of his games. He does a lot of other things, but that's what.

one of his main things. Now, he did a game called Unstoppable, which is a solo. It's a one or two player, but do yourself and your friend of favor. Don't play this two player. It's just a lot longer than it needs to be. It's still kind of fun, but it's really a solo game with card crafting and you're playing against the game. It is really cool. It's a cool puzzle. I love solo games. And what's cool about it is kind of as you're adding to your own cards, you're making kind of the challenges you face harder. So the game is naturally a really ramping up as you're increasing, you know, the strength of the other cards. Now, he's bringing that same system to... Oh, yeah. Even the, even the cards look like they're the same. Yeah,

that's interesting. So is that, that's probably common, right? You take a system and apply it to a new IP. Yeah, I mean, so a lot of times you'll have, you know, different systems and bringing them to that or other people will kind of borrow that system, you know, that, what is it, the best, some of flattery is stealing something. That's exactly it. The best form of flattery is stealing something. Yeah, right.

And with board games is like nothing, other than art, nothing is really, you can't trademark mechanics and things like that. Like art is like the only thing. So you'll see a lot of the same. Obviously, if you do the exact same game and just change words,

you're going to get called out on it quite a bit. Like there's been some of those thieverys that don't get very far in the industry. Yeah, it happens of video games too. people are they're pretty smart to that stuff you know like yeah yeah you can tell on something's inspired by borrowed from iterated on and you can tell when someone is just

straight up lifting you know sometimes literally code from somebody else's game but he's pretty much created like a whole new almost a genre and or mechanic and it's like when you're able to create a mechanic like remember when dominion first came out it was pretty much the first one with deck building

and then there was a lot of imitators and now deck buildings everywhere kind of making some of those original games a little bit Just because they've kind of, you know, you're changing on it or evolving the whole system. You know, when from Mystic Vale was great. Now, he even made a new Mystic Vale this past year that is really good. That hasn't delivered yet, but it's really, it's going to be, I mean, it looked great to me. I haven't even got a chance to play it, but I did back it on Kickstarter.

Mystic Lands is what it's called. But for him to take that system, evolve it a little bit, and then make it into this unstoppable system. which is just incredible, how much fun. Just think about how cool it is. Like every game's a little bit different. Now, the only thing that people complain about is, you know, when you start off these games, like when you get it out of the box, you're gonna have to sleeve a lot of cards,

or when you're done playing, obviously you have to take those things out of each one of the card and reset it, which takes a little bit of time, but that's kind of, you know, that's kind of the cost of playing games, if you will, you know, the timely cost. So with those new ones coming out. You build that into the gameplay time is putting things away and organizing them back, the little tiny trays they give you. Oh, yeah. Even the, so the Slade Aspire board game,

you had to do a lot of kind of sleeving a lot of things. And then when you're done playing that, since like there's upgrading cards and stuff like that, you know, a lot of people would be like, well, I'll just play the video game. Yeah, but it's a different experience. You kind of get a little bit different out of it. Playing across table, either solo or playing stuff like that.

So multiplayer just brings a different play to it. Even though now the new Slate Aspire that made multiplayer, It's just a little different. Yeah. It's, Bo's loving that, by the way. He says it's ridiculously easy with friends.

Like, you just kind of cream through stuff and it's not that hard, but he's having a blast playing with it. I feel like their multiplayer is undertuned and their solo might be a little over tuned right now. I agree. I agree.

Have you, have you, sorry to derail us a little bit. And we're even a little tight on time. These are plenty of dangers. Oh, here's a dungeon. Yeah, here's a dungeon for you.

Do, do, do, too. All right, here's your tangent. This new thing that's out, the vampire crawlers, based on vampire survivors, where it's basically a sort of a deck building game, dungeon crawler thing. Have you seen that or played that yet? So I'm trying to remember if you messaged me or if we were, or if we were talking about it, maybe on Discord or something. I still haven't played it yet.

It's unbelievable. It looks a little freaking crazy and phonetic. It's bizarre. I think you'd like it. It is very, it's so good. It's so good. I don't know. I don't even know what to describe it as though because it's not the methodic sort of, all right, let's play this card first and be careful with that card.

And let's play if I'm going to fight that boss next, I need to preserve this manna, boo, boo, you know, you're not thinking that way. There's some of that. But most of it is just like, how can I just create the most obnoxious lay waste to these monsters I possibly can with the hands I've been given? What kind of builds can I do? You have characters with certain stats, obviously. You can unlock new ones. And there's tons of those.

when you play it's super cheap too it's like nine bucks yeah that's gonna be the big thing it's so cheap that I might as well just try it out yeah it's one of my favorite things this year it's so much fun I think you just have a blast with it anyway there's that uh back to the thing sorry you were you were heading somewhere oh we were done talking about guy with the cool holes in his cards no that was pretty much about it there is a kick-starter now that I wanted to tell everybody about uh so one of the best games in the last few years was river valley glassworks It is probably the number one game I would tell people to get for introducing, you know, it's very much a holiday game or a let's just play. It's a grandma game where it's a let's just play.

Because you can just sit down, play around, and you know how to play it. It's one of the best games I've played in the last 10 years, River Valley Glassworks. So the next kind of the next step in the series, so to speak, is River Valley Jewelcraft, which is kind of that spiritual successor. It just went on Kickstarter. today it's well-funded over $130,000 these guys are good, good friends of mine

Matt Riddle, Ben Pinchback and Adam Hill, Riddle will be on our show tomorrow night. He's pretty much my main co-host on the Geek All-Stars, but they do amazing games. They did fleet, fleet dice and all the really heavy, loaded roll and right games, but this is just another gem in their series.

No pun intended. Perfectly reasonable pun, though. I liked it. Also, there's some cosplay in this. video. I like it. I'd like that they're going all in here. Oh, totally. Yeah, wearing bear suits. That's cool. Yeah, I mean, you can get this for, I think it's about 40 bucks for the regular standard edition. They always do a really good job with their kind of crazy edition. So I got to, like, the founders edition of River Valley Glassworks, which have really cool acrylic pieces and then

acrylic like tiles in it with how you're moving to tiles around instead of just punchboard. And then also the gems that you did were really nice glass pieces. So, I mean, this is going to, I'm sure this will be just as good when they, you know, produce this one as well. Well, that's awesome. Do check that out. That again is called, where is it here? Sorry, River Valley Glassworks, right? Yes, sir.

And the other one's Gemworks was the first one? No, this is River Valley Jewelcraft. Oh. And the other one is River Valley Glassworks. Gotcha. Okay. And then the rest of these will be up on TMS. They're sorry, quickt ms.

L.I later today. Yes. So watch for that. King's Gambit will be up there. Yep. All the first. And so as I get out of here, check out The Geek All-Stars tomorrow night. Well, we're going to record tomorrow night, but it'll be up shortly after where we talk to Justin Jacobson.

Chris Kirkman will be back. And Matt Riddle, we'll talk about all things, King's Gambit. Also releasing today our yearly, I go on Rolling Dice and taking names to do the yearly summer movie preview show where we do the movie draft every year. So this is going to be another interesting year for movies. So we'll see, you know, who the big winners are domestically. It's going to be a fun summer, I think. Every year, I think we should do a TMS movie draft, and we never do it. I know.

It's, it's. We should do it. We really should, yeah. I wonder if anybody, okay, any of our spreadsheet loving fans out there, regulars. What we need is the person who's able to manage it. Yeah, because we got no bandwidth for this. But if somebody out there wants to do it, we'll do a little mini version of this. We'll even have people like Dan throw in theirs.

We'll have our own little running, you know, tally at the end of the year, do some prizes, something fun like that. Well, you do it down nice and easy, especially if you're going to do like a producer draft. You have like four guys or four guys, you know, four people, if you will, four people do the draft. And then you just do domestic, you know, you do domestic and you end it. Like say, we drop dead date as October 1st and you just go from May 1st to October 1st, domestic only do a draft serpentine or one, you know, or regular 1 to 4, 1 to 4 and 4 to keep things even, you know, fair. And then just add it up. and that's it. That's pretty much how we do, that's pretty much how we do it on Rolling Dyson.

Well, you had me at Serpentine, so good job. Thank you, boys. It's your guy. Go check him out. Don't forget to listen to a show and also follow him on all the socials. And Dan, I hope between now and the next time we talk to you that ibuprofen is the strongest medication you ingest. Congrats again. And I can't wait to see you guys again. All right, man. All righty. All righty. Cool. That was great. these all i i kind of want to play this uh this new lord of the rings business i guess i know it looks great yeah i know you know the minis are going to be amazing for that too like the little mini orcs and fellowship and all that stuff so i guess it sounds like you know you can play unstoppable and get

the taste of what's coming or no is it sorry yeah yeah yeah no no no no it's the gambit yeah yeah i guess if i want the carl one early i can play the carl experience yeah yes which it sounds like like you do, but don't play with a person. Play alone. Play alone, everybody. Play with yourself. Play with yourself. Unstopably play with yourself.

All right, that is going to do it just about for the show. I'm going to play this mashup in a sec. But first, a message from a Patreon person. They sent this on Patreon, so it's a little unusual. We usually do emails and text, but because it's from there, I still think they get this. This is about the jugs of paint. This is somebody named Only Four, and they sent this. on Patreon. Hi Scott. It's on TMS

2997. Captain Padantic. You were talking, oh, pedantic, sorry. I have to say it wrong because that's how we spelled it. Pandatic is how... Pendatic. Oh, they wrote it right. He wrote it right. But Brian Dunaway, okay, thanks, Captain.

Pendantic. Pendantic. Yeah. Baby shark. Dood, do, do. Do, do. Anyway, it says you were talking about switch controllers and third party controllers, not being able to turn on the switch two. As I am a audio-only listener,

I'm not exactly sure which controller you recommend it to Brian and at what cost, but there are indeed third-party controllers that can turn on the switch two. Now, I should mention at this point of his message, there had been an update on that, and I send it to Brian later that day.

There's a firmware update to the one I got, and I think probably already on yours. One I got as well. Yep, exactly. It allows this to turn on the switch two. There was something to do with Nintendo saying you can't do it to third parties. Like it was like one of the downsides of buying a third party controller.

Something must have shaken loose either legally or otherwise to allow this to happen. Because this was a, my understanding is it was Nintendo putting their foot down going, your third party controller can't turn on the switch too. Yeah, that's how I understood it. So now that's changed and these firmwares are available. So that all changed since anyway. Anyway, he says it's currently cheaper on Amazon than direct on their site. It's a version of the controller.

I'm going to show this to everybody real quick. It's a pretty cool looking controller, and it's got, like, you can actually program macros. I love that style of D-pad, by the way. Oh, the little disc thing, yeah. The disc, yeah. I have that on a... And this does have Hall effect, so... Oh, very nice.

Yeah. The price isn't bad, 41 bucks. It's not bad, and I think there's even a coupon or no. Let's see. Limited time deal just says no coupon. Oh, wait. No, no coupon. It's just 10% cheap.

on Amazon than it is directly from them on their website. Look at this version. That is a weird look. Oops, go back. Kind of cool, the light blue. Yeah, kind of like that. You know what? Check that out.

I have enough of these, but sometimes I get tempted. I know. I have so many controllers soon. I don't know why I was showing it through that. It's supposed to be through that. Oh, there you go. Yeah, looking at it through Tad Pully Feud for some reason. Survey says.

DERP. Xbox. Anyway, thanks for the recommendation. If, oh, it went on to say, I only wish I knew about it before I bought myself the official switchdew controller as turning on the controller or console is important enough. I splurged slash wasted money. Cool. It's one way to look at it. For sure.

Totally worth it. If you're going to be using that function, then absolutely worth it. Frogpants.com slash TMS for all the ways to contact us. You can email us. You can text us, voicemail us, and, of course, Patreon people, if you're sending us messages, we'll read those too. All right. now we have a special moment to share together. Yes.

I have to read something before I play it, though. Okay. And he said, Scott, read this before you play this, but I don't know if that meant on the air or not. So I'm just going to read it on the air. Yeah, read on the air. Hopefully it doesn't say, don't read this on the air, but read it to yourself.

Yeah, if it says that, I will not. In fact, I'm going to copy it so we both can look at this here. Okay. All right, here we go. Scott and Brian. This is from Jamie, who does, you know, You guys know Jamie TMS. You know Jamie.

I think I speak for so many of us when I say this show is far more than a podcast. For people like me, it's a home, a family when we didn't have one of our own. A place to escape the realities of life, a place to belong in a world hell-bent on dividing us. You guys have carried me through some of the biggest moments of my life, getting married and having two beautiful children and eventually finding my true love of my life. What you're about to listen to is months in the making and my way of saying thank you on behalf of this incredible family. and for everything you guys have given us. Thank you for always being a safe, happy, vibrant place for every single listener. I think I speak for all of us when I say, I love you 3000.

Says Jamie. Oh, thanks, Jamie. Yeah, it's really sweet. Yeah. Now, it would be funny if this, whatever I'm about to play, just berates us the whole time. That'd be funny. You know, it will. Yeah, maybe it will.

Anyway, here is the file. The dumbest things we've ever said is what it's going to be. TMS episode 3,000 special, it's titled. And I don't know what it is. Brian doesn't know. We haven't heard this. It's about three, almost four minutes long. Enjoy. Oh, go ahead.

This is the short version of the long version. This is the short one. Okay, good. We'll play the long one. Yeah, the long one is video and we're going to watch it. Oh, gotcha. Okay. At the end there.

So, all right, here we go. Good morning, gentlemen. Gosh, golly. Can you believe you've done 3,000 of the use so far? Feels like yesterday I was stripping over my tongue talking about a strawberry pork torch. And Scott was being crotched. about some millennial word.

Really, dude, I can talk gymnasium over six, seven, any day. This podcast. Nope, scratch that. This network, this community of people, means so much not just to me, but to each and every person who makes up the tadpool.

And Jamie wanted me to kick off this little tribute to a certain morning show, definitely not named after your morning stream. Hey, it's Bobby Ann and Barry. This is doozy. It's Anthony in Adelaide's Stry. really here. Hey Scott and Brian, it's Bobby. Hey Scott and Brian, it is KT Data. This is Nicole Spag. Hello, friends. It's Amy. Hey, Scott and Brian. This is Syrinx. Hey Scott and Brian. It's BioCal. I've been listening to TMS

since 2015. I've been listening since episode one. Since I believe 2011. Back in the old rainy days of the instance. Three thousand episodes. Holy cow. Congratulations. That is not a small number. That is a very big number. That's a lot. You know, I didn't really want to listen. and dear podcast, but Amy made me. So what does TMS mean to you? The one-liners. I can definitely see why you like it. We'll always have Don Chito,

Mary Steenberger. You can eat rice is probably my favorite. And the first podcast involved boogers, and I hated that. Nerds. Nerds and wine. Growing up without a grandpa, you two old farts are the closest

thing Logan has. TMS has been with me through commutes, work days, road trips. There aren't the words to say how much I enjoy the morning stream. You've helped me smile and laugh through some really hard times.

I listened to you guys through years of chemotherapy. When my dad died, you were there for me. Midnight feedings for our kids. When I found out I was pregnant. Again, y'all were there for me. We've lost some good ones along the way. Ralph, Wabit Magic. J.J. Valentine.

Essential Trimmer. You will be missed. Through all of it, you've been there. And even the time I tried assembling a key of furniture without crying. You still cried. A little. Being an OG tadpuller is not only a privilege, but an honor. These shows really have changed my life.

Thanks for being there the whole time for the good times and the bad times. Through you, I have finally found my people. Thank you for being the pillars of a community that turned out to be somewhere I can belong. I can't tell you how important that is to me. I can't understate it. I simply can't say thank you enough for this incredible corner of the internet that you have built. Building that community, I think, is going to be the legacy of frog pants. I'm also thankful that I can call you guys friends.

Thanks for reading my friends. More than friends. We're family. Love you 3,000. I love you 3,000. I love you 3,000. I love you 3,000. Love you 3,000.

I love you 3,000. I love you 3,000. I love you 3,000. I love you 3,000. I love you 3,000. I love you 3,000. We love you 3,000. We love you 3,000.

I look forward to another 3,000 or 6,000. Sending you 3,000 cloacal kisses. And here's the 3,000 more. From me, Christine, and everybody in this fabulous community, I am honored to call a second family. Congrats on 3,000 episodes. Oh, yes, and I love you 3,000 also. Oh, I'm glad you did that at the end.

I'm getting all choked up over here. I know, exactly, yeah. Gosh, dang it, that was nice. I thought it was a mashup, like, here's all the goofy shit you said for the last 15 years. And I'm so glad it wasn't. Like hearing all of your voices and some of you who we hear every week and some of you who we don't get to hear, except for like at events and meetups and stuff like that. It's awesome.

Yeah, I picked up Dr. Nikki there at the end. Yeah. I heard Logan yell at one point. Logan yelling at one point. Yeah. That's great. All these voices we know, a few I didn't know. Yeah.

Yeah, that was awesome. Wow, Jamie. What are you trying to do to me, man? Freaking. And you got that music. Use it going the whole time for shit's sakes. I know. It's like a, like a memorial.

Yeah. Yeah. I'm in some very special episode of Blossom today is what's going on. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I know. TVZGon says, just wait for the video. I'm sure, exactly. Oh, yeah, I can't wait for this.

Holy shit. All right. I don't have to sit down for that. Yeah. We'll be doing that after the show. And also, for those that are like, oh, I really want to see that. We'll put it up somewhere. Yeah. Don't worry, but it'll be a purely video experience.

So those who are in the chat room live right now, we're going to roll right into that after the show before we even do titles and stuff, I guess. Or should we do titles and stuff first and then that? Let's do titles and stuff first and then that. Yeah, that we can get it out of the way. Otherwise, we're going to be like, and lady, grandma, playing video games,

and more on this episode. Yeah, we can't be having that. So we will do that here shortly, and you all can hang out and watch it with us if you're here live right now. Yeah. And for those again who want to see it later, we'll figure something out up on the YouTube channel and put it up there. Yep. Yes. Oh, yeah, perfect.

For now, we'll get out of here. Frogpants.com slash TMS is our website. Brian probably has a song dedicated to something. I see a number in it. It looks familiar. Yeah. This is, this did not come from somebody. This came from me.

I guess I'm somebody. this is a German performer who goes by the name of Schneider TM. He is a German musician from Berlin. And when you search for this guy, he's about the same age as us, actually, born 1970, August, 1970. When you do a search for Schneider, TM, the first thing that usually comes up is a song called the Light 3000. And thinking about this song,

basically it feels like at times there's lyrics that kind of talk about talk about us and talk about what we're doing here. There is a light that never goes out. It is a cover of the Smith song. There is a light that never goes out. But his version is called The Light 3000 and it's awesome. Here is Schneider T.M. Thanks for listening.

The Frogpants Network lives at Frogpants.com. Stop thinking with your glands. Ew.