The Nick Bare Podcast - 082: Reflections on Legacy and Building a Life of Impact

Episode Date: September 2, 2024

For this conversation, I wanted to share personal updates about my expanded family and the challenges and joys of welcoming my newborn son, Niko. I dive into the significant changes that come with having a second child, drawing parallels from a conversation with our COO and his running analogy. This episode explores the importance of patience, endurance, and growth during life's stressful seasons. I reflect on what legacy means, moving beyond material wealth to focus on impact, character, and teaching future generations. Through my experiences, I emphasize the importance of purpose and direction, the difference between making and finding time, and transforming perceived enemies into allies to build a lasting legacy. CHAPTERS 00:00 The Importance of Legacy 00:53 Life Update: Becoming a Father of Two 01:50 Challenges of Parenting Two Kids 05:28 Emotional Moments and Reflections 09:52 Defining Legacy 20:18 Making Time for What Matters 38:40 Purpose and Direction in Life 45:52 Building a Legacy Without Enemies 52:07 Final Thoughts on Legacy Strength, endurance, and wellness supplements to fuel your performance. SAVE 10% at BPN Supps: https://bit.ly/nickbare10audio FOLLOW: IG: https://www.instagram.com/thenickbarepodcast YT: youtube.com/@nickbarefitness

You can spend your entire life choosing the hard right over the easy wrong, doing the right things, being a person of character, treating people the right way. And then with one bad or wrong decision, you can lose all of that legacy, all that trust, all that compassion, all that loyalty in a matter of seconds. Like that fast. That's how important these compounding decisions are. the sum of our life's decisions, the small and the large, the sum of those decisions all equate to the person we are on our deathbed and the impact we create and leave on other people,

ultimately the legacy that we create and leave. Hello, everyone, and welcome back to another episode of the podcast. Some changes in my life. I am now officially a dad of two. So my daughter, Charlie, she was born a little over two years ago. And a few weeks ago, my son, Nico, was born. Nico Austin Bear was born August 10th, 2004, 7 pounds, 2 ounces. Just nine days after my birthday.

So now my birthday is sandwiched between my children. My daughter, Charlie's, hers is July 15th. Mine is August 1st. And then my son is August 10th. So we are now officially a family of four with two dogs. So I guess a family of six in the very household. And it's changed a lot. I mean, going from one kid to two kids is very different.

Going from zero to one was a massive life transition. But now having a second, knowing what to expect after having a first, the transition is different, but it's still challenging. It's still hard. It's still difficult. And one of the ways that our COO, CFO, Josh Holly described it to me, because he has two kids himself, was in comparison to running. So, you know, when you first start running, say you trained for and complete a half marathon, 13.1 miles. And then you say, oh, I want to be more ambitious, I want a bigger goal.

I'm going to go run a full marathon, 26.2 miles. And 13.1 miles didn't feel that bad. So 26.2 should just feel like twice of what the 13.1 felt. Twice a distance, twice the effort, twice the hurt, twice the pain. And it's not necessarily the way it works. You know, that additional 13.1 miles in top of the first 13.1 miles does more cumulative damage mentally, emotionally, and physically. Now, that's not necessarily what I'm correlating to having a second kid is like, but the way

Josh explained it to me was you would think that just by having a second child or bringing an additional person into your family, into your life, that it's just twice the amount of work. But the reality is it's much more than that. And me and Seth are in it right now. Nico was born a little bit more than two weeks ago and just trying to navigate new schedules and routines and the lack of sleep. I think right now we're averaging around four to five hours of sleep at night. and then dedicating just as much time and energy to Charlie as we were previously before

Nico was born. It's a season in which we are learning or exploring or teaching, we're trying. It's a season where you have to endure the process. You have to be patient in your weakness. And sometimes that weakness, for me at least, is patience. in itself. And there's a lot of learning right now. There's a lot of growing in the bare household, not just in numbers of people there, but we're being tested, we're being challenged and that stress, that stimulus is facilitating an adaptation. That adaptation is growth.

I will be honest in saying that of all the things I've done in my life, joining the military, going to Ranger's school, running ultramarathons, building a building, business, working on my fitness, staying disciplined with my health. Of all the things I've done, being a parent is the hardest. But it's the most rewarding. It's the most fulfilling. My daughter now being two years old and her personality just exploding and thriving, I mean, it's a love that I have never experienced ever before my life. It's, it's truly unique. And this past weekend, we were sitting in the living room, it was Sunday morning, and it was right after watching church. So we didn't go to church

because Niko's, you know, two weeks old, and we're still just not venturing out too much and taking a two-year-old and two-year-old to church just, it'd, felt like a much bigger challenge than we needed in our life right now. So we watched church online. And after church was over, we were watching country music videos. And the Cody Johnson music video for, is it dirt cheap? I believe it's dirt cheap came on. And in this music video, it's this old gentleman who owns this big property. And these businessmen come to his property and they try to buy his land from him. And they offer him an insane amount of money. And they tell him it's more money than he would have ever experienced or had in his life if he didn't have this opportunity on his doorstep in this

moment. And he said, no money can buy this property because of the memories that I have on this land. And it's showing these images and these video clips from years prior where his daughter is really young on the property, on the farm, running through the fields. And he doesn't want to sell the land because he doesn't want to lose these memories. There's no money that can buy these memories or take that away because that time was and is so valuable. And as I was watching this music video and listening to the song and looking at my daughter who was looking at me as my wife was next to her holding Nico, I started crying.

And I'm not a very emotional guy. I don't say that with a great amount of pride. It's just, it just is what it is. Like, I don't cry often. And my wife, Steph, she's only seen me cry a handful of times. On our wedding day was one as she was walking down the aisle. When my mom passed away from cancer, it was the second. And a third, there were probably only three times.

The third time was when we were in Nashville. and I made the decision to come back as the CEO of BPN, move my family and a small creative team from Nashville back to Texas after realizing I made a big mistake from leaving the business in Texas in the first place. And the guilt I felt around leaving the team in the business and moving to Nashville made me very emotional. I was crying one of those nights, cried myself to sleep. But we're watching this music video and I could feel

a lump in my throat and I could feel my eyes start to swell up. As I'm just thinking about the memories I'm creating with my daughter and how I want my children to view me and love me and remember the time that I spent with them, the quality time, the real time with them. And then I started walking to the kitchen just to, I need some space. I need I need to step away for a little bit, let this clear out. maybe you'll grab a little snack or something. And Seth turned around and looked at me.

She said, what's wrong? What's going on? She thought I was like choking. And then it just all came out. It started tears flowing down my face. Just started crying. Thinking about the memories that I will create with my family, with my children,

and the legacy that I'm creating for my, myself and generations to come that will set them up for success and that they will remember forever and ever and ever and they will pass down to their children and their grandchildren and their great grandchildren and maybe it was a lack of sleep after having a newborn in the house or just the transition of going from one kid to two kids but it was like a really emotional experience for me. That happened this past weekend. And that's what I want to really hone in on in this episode is legacy. The legacy that we're creating, the legacy that we're leaving. Like, what is legacy? What is not legacy? When I was younger, I used to think that legacy,

I would look up to these super successful athletes or, entrepreneurs, business owners that were extremely wealthy, that had these massive mansions, all the cars, all the attention. There were movies and newspaper articles all about them. I thought that's what legacy was. I thought legacy was materialistic objects and money that was passed down for generations to come. You know, the legacy of this, this man. who built and sold a business for a billion dollars, he took care of his family for generations to come financially. When I was younger, I thought that's what legacy was.

That was the only way to create legacy. And that was a very naive and ignorant way to look at what legacy can and should be. And now realizing that legacy is not financial. It is not materialistic. It's not a thing. It's not something you can hold or even physically share or pass down.

But legacy is its impact, its change, its influence and the ability to inspire others to choose the hard right over the easy wrong. Legacy is is character. Passing down a legacy is teaching the generations what is right versus what is wrong.

How to be courageous and go after the goals that you want to achieve and accomplish. It is inspiring others to have the confidence to pursue a life that is meaningful to them. and the ability to reject conformity based off of what society is telling us to do and what social norms say is acceptable in pursuing a life that you know is right and honorable. That is legacy. The legacy that I want to create and leave and pass down is foundational in the way that I want my family or hope my family lives by the people that watch and consume my content, it is foundational in their life, the way they show up as a spouse or a parent or a leader or a manager or whatever it is

they do in their work, their professional and personal life, legacy is that impact. It's that change. It is that character building trait. and legacy is built in drops, but it's lost in buckets. And I've used this quote before in regards to a building a brand. I'm talking about building a business, building a brand, and building a community and a strong culture around that brand. You build that brand in drops.

And these drops are just like the daily deposits that you create and leave, that build this brand and to be something that has the ability to resonate with other people. It's shared beliefs and values that other people resonate with and want to join and believe in. And you build it in drops, but you can lose it in buckets. I mean, you can lose it overnight. You can ruin your brand. You can destroy your brand with one bad decision. Literally, seconds.

You can lose it in buckets. Same with legacy. You can spend your entire life choosing the hard right over the easy wrong, doing the right things, being a person of character, treating people the right way. And then with one bad or wrong decision, you can lose all of that legacy, all that trust, all that compassion, all that loyalty in a matter of seconds.

like that fast. That's how important these compounding decisions are. The sum of our life's decisions, the small and the large, the sum of those decisions all equate to the person we are on our deathbed and the impact we create and leave on other people, ultimately the legacy that we create and leave. Makes you think of this one movie. So right now, I'm working on my book.

It's called Go On More. And it's set to be published June of 2025. I've been working on this book for about 18 months now. It's been a process. It's 10 chapters. One of those chapters is on legacy. And I actually just finished my final manuscript and turned it in yesterday. So we finished the manuscript a few weeks ago, and then it got sent to an editor.

That editor pushed back the book to me to make changes. There were 5,500 recommended changes. Now, some of these were grammatical, you know, changing the spelling of certain words, adding commas, just cleaning up the sentences because I was just typing away and typing in the way that I speak. but some of these edits were also recommendations to make the stories flow better, make the chapters flow better, just bring the whole thing together. But I addressed all those 5,500 recommended changes in edits.

It took me a few weeks, and then yesterday I turned it back in, final manuscript to the editor. It'll go through one last round of proofreading, and then it's locked in. and then we'll be ready to publish because I have a publishing deal for this book June of 2025 and in the book, I share this story about this movie.

So the movie is called The Butterfly Effect with Ashen Coucher. You might be familiar. But in the butterfly effect, Ashen Coucher plays this character name Evan and Evan has this disorder or he gets seizures

and in these seizures as he has, he can go back in time and change the past, which then changes the future. So he's found a way to time travel to manipulate his life to achieve the things that he wants to achieve, the outcomes that he would have hoped for

that he didn't end up happening. And when he has these seizures and he goes back in time and makes certain, changes to certain things that happened, events, relationships, people, decisions. Then he goes back into the future and realizes that these small or large changes that he made had consequences that he never even factored in that he now has to go back and refix. And he realizes over the course of this movie that these small decisions that he makes,

small or large, by going back in time traveling, they don't just affect one part of his life. They affect many parts of his life and not just his life, but other people's lives as well. Friends, peers, family, people he doesn't even know what affects their lives. The smallest things that he changes, the smallest. Friendships, decisions, being nice to one person, or not nice to another. And in this movie, you realize that where we end up in life is literally the sum of these small, large, even micro decisions that we're making on a daily basis. And they all add up. They're all cumulative to where we end up right before we die, for better or for worse.

So we can't talk about legacy without thinking of or talking about how, important decision making it is. Where we spend our time, the decisions we make, the intention we put behind those decisions, the way we weigh the pros and cons, the wins and losses, the consequences, the benefits, all of those decisions add up to create legacy. So these decisions we make on a daily basis, as small as they may seem or feel, could actually have pretty big impact today, tomorrow, years to come, decades down the road. Sometimes we don't know until it actually happens. Something that I've been saying for years now is that if it matters to you, you will make time.

And now having a second child, having a newborn in the house again, this saying means a whole lot right now. It is resurfaced for me. If it matters to you, you will make time. And all of the content I've been promoting around this or using as an example is around fitness, training, health. If your diet matters to you, you will make time for it. If fitness and staying in shape matters to you, you will make time for it. If spending time with your family matters to you, you will make time for it. If your work matters to you, you will make time for it. It can be applied to all these different things.

The question we have to ask ourselves is what actually matters to us. Everything can't matter. If everything matters, nothing matters. And we don't have time, we don't have enough time for everything to matter. So as life responsibilities get crazier and they increase, like right now my life responsibilities have just increased over the last two weeks because there's a newborn in the house. There's new ways I have to support my wife. There's new ways I have to support my daughter, Charlie. There's new ways that I have to support this new baby in the house.

what matters to me? Where am I spending my time? And if it matters to me, I will make time for it. So when life gets crazy and there's a transition and you get thrown into this new season or this new chapter and your responsibilities increase, the demand for your time increases, your obligations are more demanding,

you have to take audit and accountability of what actually matters. And this is what I do personally. Nika was born, which disrupted our life in the best way possible. But it's up to us to really be intentional of where we spend our time and energy. So it's literally making a list. All right, what actually matters to me? Well, my family matters and spending time with my, my family, spending time with my wife, my daughter, and now my son.

My work matters to me, building BPN, showing up for and as the leader in this business at the capacity that I want and need to be. And my health and fitness matters to me. Those three things matter to me. So I'm going to make time for those three things. Now, there are certain things that I would like to make time for, but they're not going to fit into those three things. So they actually don't matter to me anymore. I love going downtown Austin and running town lake loop on a Saturday morning.

But it doesn't matter that much to me because it's a 30-minute drive to and from. And I just don't have that time to take away. from my family, my wife, my kids. So running downtown on a Saturday morning doesn't really matter to me anymore. It used to, but it doesn't anymore. There's things that you can spend your time, your money, your energy on that might used to matter to you, but as your responsibilities evolve and change and increase, the things that used to matter might not matter anymore. And that's completely okay. But you have to be

honest with yourself, what actually matters to me? And then commit to, that's where I'm going to spend time. If it matters to you, you will make time. And something that I was thinking about right after Niko was born is that you have to make the time instead of trying to find the time. I can't reinforce that enough. That might just sound like words, but let me break down and explain it. If it matters to you, you will make the time. But there's a difference between making time and finding time. Making time requires forward thinking and backwards planning.

So, okay, here's what matters to me. Here's what the next week looks like. I need to make time for the things that matter. me. So that means I'm going to look into that seven-day forecast. I'm going to write down all the things I have on each day. I'm going to create a timeline. And that's going to tell me by backwards planning where I can make time to fit in my work. Where can I make time to fit in my meal prep? Where can I make time to fit in my training? Where can I make time to be with my family and not thinking about anything else other than being with my family.

We're forward thinking and being proactive and backwards planning to allocate time for these certain things. Now, it doesn't have to be so rigid where your calendar says from 6 a.m. to 7 a.m. I am, blah, blah, blah, blah. From 7 a.m. to 8 a.m. I am blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. From 9 to 10, so on and so forth. It doesn't have to be like that. But you can time block certain things and you can plan appropriately to make sure that you

or getting done the things that actually matter to you. That's making time. Forward thinking, backwards planning, having a strategy, and then executing. Finding time is being reactive. Finding time is laying in bed the night before, thinking of all the things you have to get done the next day, not making a plan, not being proactive, not setting an alarm, waking up whenever and then you start blocking and tackling certain tasks and responsibilities that have to get done. And before you know it, it's 10.30 p.m. You didn't prep any of your food.

You did a half-ass job at work. You didn't work out and you kind of spent some time with the family. But it is what it is. You just couldn't find the time. Well, you couldn't find the time because you didn't make the time. There's a difference between making time and finding time. And it's being proactive. That's how we continue to create and leave legacy. People are going to remember, and when I say people, the people that really do matter to us, are closest friends and family, maybe coworkers, maybe partners, spouses. Those people who are really important to us in our life, they're going to remember not necessarily what we bought them, what we gifted them, where we sent them.

They're going to remember the time we spent with them. And they're going to remember if we prioritized that time. My kids are going to know over the next couple of years and decades, they're going to know what mattered to me. I might not even have to tell them what mattered to me, but they're going to know based off of my schedule and where I was at, when I was present, what I was doing with them, how I showed up in the home, the values that I instilled, the purpose that I had behind my work and in my family, they're going to know what mattered to me. me, even if I don't tell them.

And that's how they're going to remember me. That's the legacy that I'm leaving. I was thinking about this on a run. A few bullet points that I'm going through for this episode. I think a lot about this stuff. I think a lot about podcast episodes when I'm running. Because for me, running is clarity. A lot of people will say this and my running coach, Jeff Cunningham, has reinforced this.

a lot of people will say that they run to clear their head and that is often inaccurate. People don't run to clear their head because clearing is empty. People run to gain clarity. Clarity is organized thoughts. It's an organized mind. People want clarity from running. They don't want a clear head. So I think about all of these topics.

when I'm running. And I run with my phone because I run early. I typically take off at 5 a.m. I'm done by 6 a.m. And I have my phone with me in the event that my wife needs something, especially with two young kids at the house right now. So I carry my phone with me all the time. So one, it's a method of communication,

but also as I'm running and something pops in my head and I don't want to forget it, I will be actively running, swiping up, opening my notes app on my phone and typing things down that I want to talk about in a podcast because my mind is so organized

and there's so much clarity in that moment that I'm thinking with such great purpose. My thoughts are just so significant to what matters to me in that moment. Half the time when I get home from the run, I open on my notes app and you can't read anything because I was trying to type as I was running. And, you know, it's end of August right now in central Texas. When I'm running at 5 a.m., it's still 90 degrees humid, dripping in sweat. So I'm trying to type in my notes app with sweat beads all over the phone and trying to use a touch screen with a sweaty glass.

It's just not effective. It does not work. but I try to write down as many notes as I can and while I'm running. And one of the things I was thinking about on my run the other day was how grateful I am that I started BPN when I did. You know, bringing a new child home, it just completely changes your perspective on life

and how meaningful life is and how short life is how great life is, how hard life can be. And that first week, that first couple of days you bring a newborn home, you're trying to just navigate sleep and structure and routine. And you're losing your mind because you're not sleeping. There's crying all the time. There's just a lot going on. So when I go on my morning run,

because that morning run still matters to me because I need that morning run. and I will run no matter what time I have to, whether it's 1.30 a.m., 2.30, 4, whatever it is, I'll find some gaps in time when everyone's asleep. And I was thinking how grateful I am that I started BPN when I did. Started BPN in 2012. I was 22 years old. Little responsibility in life.

It was between my junior and senior year of college. It was right before joining the military. I had no money to my name, little responsibility, not many obligations, very little to lose, but a lot to gain. And I went all in on this dream, this passion of mine to start this business with this mission, hoping that it would turn into something great at some point. and I had all the time in the world to work on it and build it. I didn't know it at the time. I didn't know how valuable time was back then before having kids.

I took a lot of it for granted. I think a lot of younger people do. But when I started BPN, like I said, my responsibilities were very limited. And I'm so glad that I started it then because I could spend, if I wanted or needed to every waking moment to building the business. I could truly lay the foundation of building a legacy that I would be proud of. And it wasn't taking away from the time of my family or my kids and my wife or my job necessarily at the time.

I'm very grateful for the fact that I did that back then. And I realize that some people who are listening to this podcast might have that opportunity to right now. You might be at a point in your life where you have limited responsibility. You don't have a family yet. You don't have kids. You're young. You have very little money. You have very little to lose, but a lot to gain. This is the perfect time for you to get started. Start building something. But also on the flip side of that, you may be listening to this thinking, well, I have a full-time job that I need to work because I need to support my wife or my husband and my family, our kids,

I have all of these responsibilities, and I don't have a lot to lose. I can't afford to lose anything. And I would still encourage that person, maybe that's you listening, the perfect time to start is right now. The perfect time to start doing whatever it is you want to do, whatever is you're curious about, are you curious about getting healthier and maybe running a marathon

or making better food choices and decisions in your household for your family, for yourself? Is it a business you want to start? It is a passion you want to pursue. Is it a job promotion that you want to achieve at some point? But you're not willing to make time for it because it doesn't actually matter enough to you right now. So you're going to try to find time to fit those things in later. Well, that's not going to work. Already talked about that.

You have to make time instead of trying to find time. And if it truly does matter to you, you will make time. You will eliminate other things that you're doing that truly don't matter. There are so many people I talk to that say, oh, man, like I want to get in shape or I want to start this business. But I just don't have the time. Well, let me see your calendar. Where are you spending your time? Oh, it looks like Saturday's pretty free.

Oh, no, I don't got Saturday. Saturday is fantasy football day in college football games. I got to watch those for eight hours. Well, if that's what matters to you, you're not willing to make time for the other things. And the reality is also that our responsibilities rarely decrease over time. So that's why right now is the perfect time to get started. Because life might seem crazy right now and chaotic and stressful, but I can guarantee

you a year from now, it's probably going to be even crazier and more stressful and you're going to have more responsibilities. Life will probably naturally just get more complicated and more difficult, potentially a lot more fulfilling with that stress and that complication and those challenges. But if there's something you want to do, do it now. I'm glad that I started BPN when I did. I'm very grateful that I did that. But the next best time to do it if I didn't start it then would be today.

It'd be right now. It wouldn't be a year from now. It wouldn't be two years from now. It wouldn't be three years from now because my kids then will be two, and four, three and five, it's probably going to be more hectic then. That's why the perfect time to start doing what you want to do, create a legacy, lay the foundation is right now, find out what truly matters to you, make that list, and then eliminate or minimize the other things.

You know, a few years ago, I had Bejurus Kulian on the podcast for the first time. he's now been on the podcast twice. And he told me a story, which I also shared my book, Gil and More, that I'll always remember. And it was about purpose and direction and the importance of having purpose and direction in our life.

And Bejors was telling this story about this dog that he had named Cookie. And they got this dog, and they hired a trainer to train their dog. And the trainer told them with Cookie, and the type of dog that it was, that this dog needs purpose and direction in its life.

And Bejurus goes, well, what happens if you don't provide this dog purpose and direction? And the trainer says, if you don't provide this dog purpose and direction, it will dig holes all over your yard. If this animal, if this dog doesn't have clear purpose and direction, it's going to self-destruct and just dig holes everywhere. And Bezos instantly said, oh, it's just like us as human beings.

If we don't have purpose and direction in our life, we will dig holes everywhere. We will self-destruct. We will erode our full potential. We will destroy our legacy before we can build it. So Cookie, his dog, was provided purpose in direction. in the home so that it didn't self-destruct. And this dog didn't dig holes all over the yard. That's just like us as people,

like to truly build and create a legacy that we're proud of, that our family will be proud of that's passed on from generation to generation. We need purpose and direction in our life. There's a few different ways to look at purpose. I know purpose is like this big, lofty word. People used to ask me all the time, what is your purpose?

Find your purpose. It's like, what's my purpose? My purpose is to change the world. You know, it's something like you just throw out this, hell Mary, I'm going to change the world. I'm going to save planet Earth. And I didn't know how to answer that for the longest time. And I view purpose in a few different ways now.

Like my life purpose, why am I here on Earth? Why are we here on Earth? If you're a Christian, if you have a foundation of faith like me, my purpose is to be more Christ-like. It is to follow the word and the message of Jesus. That is the big purpose. It is to be more Christ-like so that when we're done living this worldly life, we can live eternal life in heaven.

That's like the overarching purpose of my life. But then there's purpose in your work. There's purpose in missions, meaningful missions that you pursue and sit down to achieve. There's purpose behind me going after certain physical fitness goals. There's purpose behind why I want to build BPN. There's purpose behind the way that I show up as a father, as a husband, as a family member as a leader in my business. There's a life purpose and there's work and mission and project purpose.

But we need purpose. We need direction because if we don't have those things, one, you're going to dig holes in your own yard like Badrus' dog cookie, but also you have no North Star of what you're working towards or working on. you're just aimlessly setting out to achieve something that lacks intention, that lacks clarity, that lacks purpose. And it's really hard to build a strong foundational legacy without purpose and direction. That's actually one of the reasons I got this tattoo in my forearm.

So this tattoo that I've wanted to get for a long time now, I got in Nashville. and it's a lighthouse. And this lighthouse has these waves coming off of my hand into my wrist, into my forearm that are crashing up against the lighthouse. And then there is this octopus, these tentacles that are wrapping around the lighthouse, pulling it down, and all these things are coming at it from the bottom.

But the light of the lighthouse still shines. And a lighthouse for me provides direction. It has very clear purpose. Its purpose onshore is to guide these ships out at sea into where they need to come back to. It is foundational. It is strong. It is embedded into the earth. And it's most useful when the storms are the greatest.

When waves are crashing and it's raining and there's lightning and thunder and the skies aren't clear, the lighthouses is one thing that when it is in the moment of the darkest times, it is this shining light that guides the ships lost at sea back to where they need to be. It has a very clear purpose and direction. And all of these other things are going to try and tear it down, like the water. and the creatures of the sea and just natural erosion but when built properly

they last hundreds of years with very clear purpose and direction there's so much meaning behind that where even when times get dark and the world becomes evil and everyone is against you and people become

they become conform to what is accepted which may be good or bad, it is really important when focusing on building a legacy that you want to be proud of and it's foundational for you and your family and generations to come.

Be the light, be the lighthouse in moments of complete darkness when it is just pure evil in dark and destructive. Be the lighthouse. And the last thing I want to talk about in regards to legacy is something that I more so recently grew with and learned, learned the hard way. You know, when I think about legacy and what I want to teach my family, I want to teach my

kids, I want people to learn from me through these different platforms that we create content for the podcast, YouTube, social media platforms, the book that I'm writing. My mission with those projects that I'm working for or working on is to create impact and help people choose the hard right over the easy wrong. And this last thing I want to talk about is all about the difference between enemies and allies. I used to view everyone who was a competitor to me, everyone pretty much outside of my direct friends and my direct business, I viewed as an enemy. I didn't think that there was enough room in the world for everyone to win. And that if I wasn't winning, that I was losing.

and if someone else was winning, I was losing. And if someone else was winning more than my wins, I was still losing. And I started to view everyone as a competitor. I started to view a lot of people as enemies. Just because they were doing better than me, they were maybe in my same space, maybe they weren't in my same space. And it was a really immature and horrible place to be operating from. And I eventually realized that these people were only enemies to me because I was making them my enemies.

If you view someone as your enemy, they will become your enemy. If you view someone as an unhealthy competitor, they will be an unhealthy competitor. The reality is there's room in this world for everyone to win. And just because someone is winning in your same space, an adjacent space or a completely different space, doesn't mean that you are losing. by any means. There is room for everyone to have some wins here. And I was listening to this podcast. It was one of the founders' episodes with David Senra.

And he was talking about this dinner that he had with John Mackey. And John Mackey is the founder of Whole Foods. Whole Foods is based out of here in Austin, Texas. It's where they started and their H-Q was still here in Austin. And John Mackey talked about, this story of creating secret allies. And when he first got started with his natural grocery store, Whole Foods, it was just one store.

Just one store in this three-story house in Austin, Texas. And when you just have one store and you're buying food from a wholesaler, a distributor, if you're not buying these massive volumes, you don't get great pricing. the more volume you purchase, the better pricing you get. So if you have 10 stores, you get better pricing. If you have 100 stores, you get even better pricing. If you have 1,000 stores, you might get the best pricing possible. So it's priced by volume.

When you have one store, you're not getting a really good discounted pricing. And John recognizes early on. And yet all these competitors in the space, all these other people, people who had grocery stores and natural grocery stores. So what he ended up doing is actually turning these competitors or turning these enemies into allies. And he created this secret alliance where he went to all these other natural grocery store chains that were small.

And they created a group so they could all go in together to buy food from these wholesalers and distributors. And because they were buying greater volume together, they were getting better discounted pricing. And he realized in that exercise through that experiment that everyone can win. And just because your competitor is winning doesn't mean that you are necessarily losing. My whole message behind that story is that part of me building my legacy and the way that I think about it is I want to teach my kids. I want to teach people how to live a life that I believe is filled with integrity and in character, in transparency,

and being empathetic and kind, but also really ambitious and very hardworking. And I don't want my kids to make the same mistake that I made. I don't want you to make the same mistakes that I made where I viewed everyone as an enemy. And because I viewed them as an enemy, they actually became an enemy from both sides. We were enemies from each opposing side.

But if you don't view everyone as an enemy and you actually view them as an ally and you approach it with healthy competition and kindness and warmth, but also still ambition and a hardworking mentality, they don't necessarily have to be an enemy. And we don't need all these enemies in the world. We really don't. And if you want to make everyone an enemy and view everyone that way, we'll just know that that's the legacy you're creating. That's part of your character.

That's part of your identity. That's what you're teaching to the generations that come after you. And does that help them or does that actually hurt them? So those are some of the things that I've been thinking about recently in regards to legacy building, especially in the two weeks that my son, Nico Austin Bear, has been born, which has been a crazy two weeks. And I'm really excited for the future of my family. watching my kids grow, cry over some more Cody Johnson music videos with them, and really

teaching them how to choose the hard right over the easy wrong and build a legacy that they're proud of.