The One You Feed - Are You Too Easy or Too Hard on Yourself

Episode Date: February 4, 2018

When you are feeling down is it better to push yourself to do the things you know are good for you or should you allow yourself to take it easy and do less? Depends....If you like these mini episodes donate to our Patreon campaign and get an extra mini episode per month.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together, our mission on the Really Know Really podcast is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like why the bathroom door doesn't go all the way to the floor, what's in the museum of failure, and does your dog truly love you? We have the answer. Go to reallyknowreally.com

and register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. The Really Know Really podcast. Follow us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi friends, time for another mini episode. The topic this week is something that came up in our Facebook group this week, and it went something like this.

I'm dealing with depression. And some people say the way to do that is to get up and exercise and eat right and try and connect with other people. And then other people say, hey, just go easy on yourself, take it slow. You know, just be good to yourself and relax. And so which should I do? And I think this is a great question. And the person in the group who said that also said, look, I know I should be doing some of these more positive things, but I just, it's very difficult for me. All I want to do is lay on the couch, watch Netflix and eat junk food, which I think we can all relate with to some degree. I think this is a very good question.

It's also a very difficult question to answer because the answer is it depends. And I think it depends on a lot of factors. The most important one being you and what works for you. You've often heard me use the analogy of depression as the emotional flu. And I think it's an analogy that is useful in this circumstance. So exercise, eating well, connecting with other people, all those things to me are like washing my hands a lot as far as preventing the flu and going and getting the flu vaccine. I can do a lot of that stuff as a preventative step. And when I'm doing more of that, I am less likely to get the emotional flu or a bout of depression. So those things are really important to me as preventative. As I slide into depression, depending on its severity,

those things become much harder to do and it depends. So I think that I try and keep doing those things because I know they're good for me, but I also give myself a lot more slack. And I think this is the way to kind of do both these things, which is if you're feeling lousy like that, try and do something that you know is in the self-care regimen. Try and do something that you know helps, even if that help is insignificant in the moment. You know, a quick walk around the block or three minutes of exercise or three minutes of meditation or one phone call to a friend. See if you can do something small and then you've got the rest of the time to kind of take it slow and work with yourself and be easy on yourself. I also think it depends on what our natural tendency is.

Some of us have a natural tendency to try and do too much. We're always doing something, and if we're not doing something or accomplishing something, we feel bad about it. And in those cases, right, taking it easier, taking it slower at certain points is really good for us. is really good for us. Others of us have the opposite tendency, which is that, left to our own devices, we will lay around and watch Netflix and eat junk food all of the time. And so, in those cases, for people like that, the prompt or the encouragement to push a little bit harder can often be helpful. It depends on where you're coming from. The other thing is circling back to the flu idea or analogy. Another concept comes up for me, which is how to deal with the flu or cold while I have it. And while I have it, right, I just try and take really good care of myself,

drink a lot of fluids, rest, rest, rest, right? And then when I come out of it, I'm able to engage in those preventative activities again. But the reason that that analogy of the flu or, you know, the emotional flu has been so helpful to me is that it doesn't cause me to fall into an existential crisis every time my depression rears its head. Now, I believe that we need to be spending time looking at our lives. And I do believe that depression has a lot of causes that relate spending time looking at our lives. And I do believe that depression has a lot of causes that relate to how we live our lives. Are we living with purpose and integrity?

Are we doing a lot of those things? So those things are important to deal with. My experience has been in the midst of an acute bout of depression is not the time to re-examine my life. It's the time to take care of myself and get better. So by knowing that I've kind of got something like the flu, that in my case is going to, there's going to be some, at least, lightening of symptoms at some point. That's the time for me that I think looking at the deeper underlying things can be helpful. And then the last thing I'll say is, you know, if depression is incapacitating to a great degree for a very long amount of time, I strongly recommend getting help and not listening to a podcast host for all your advice. Because obviously, depression can be a medical condition.

And in a lot of cases, certain medications are very useful in treating depression. I don't think they're the whole story. I don't think that just taking a pill and going about living in whatever way you have been works, right? I think it's a more holistic answer. But medical help can be part of the solution, particularly if you're in such a place that you're unable to do the other things that we know will help with depression. Exercise, eating right, living a life of purpose, doing things that matter. If you're to the point that you can't do any of those things, then seeing a medical professional is probably a good idea because you have been unsuccessful in working your way out of it. So those are some thoughts on depression that came up from a post in the Facebook group.

We'll have a new episode out on Tuesday as always. Thank you so much for listening. If you love what we're doing here, go over to patreon.com. If you like these mini episodes, go over to oneufeed.net slash support and you'll get access to a bonus mini episode every month that no one else gets if you subscribe at the $10 level. So oneufeed.net slash support if you like what you're hearing. And we'll talk Tuesday. Thanks. Bye. Thank you.