The One You Feed - Johnette Napolitano

Episode Date: August 4, 2015

[powerpress] This week we talk to Johnette Napolitano of Concrete BlondeJohnette Napolitano is an American singer, songwriter and bassist best known as the lead vocalist/songwriter and bassist for the alternative rock group Concrete Blonde.Johnette is currently a resident of Joshua Tree, California. She composes music for films and works as a gallery artist, specializing in working with discarded and reclaimed materials. She also takes care of rescue horses.Her latest record is called Naked and her book is called Rough Mix.Chris and I have been huge fans of her work for over 25 years.Our Sponsor this Week is Spirituality and Health Magazine. Click here for your free trial issue and special offer.  In This Interview Johnette and I Discuss...The One You Feed parable.Channeling negative emotions into art.The role of our environment on our moods.Finding the right balance between repressing and indulging our moods.Flamenco dancing.The danger of denying the spiritual side of ourselves.How relevant "God is a Bullet" is today.Willing her property to The Desert Land Trust.Being rejected early in their career.The song "True"Paradox and Contradiction.How cliches are cliches for a reason.Fear of missing out.Working with Harold Budd.Using social media in a positive way.The mystery of life.Her new three song EP.Moving out of Hollywood.Her new song "Here"The things she does to comfort herself.Who "Joey" is about.The lesson that has taken her the longest to learn.How life can end at any minute and learning to appreciate it while we are here.How every moment is precious.That sleep is the sex of the new millennium: you'll be lucky if you get any.Songs featured in this episode:God is a BulletTrueHereJoey Johnette Napolitano LinksJohnette Napolitano HomepageJohnette Napolitano- FacebookJohnette Napolitano- TwitterSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

If somebody's kicking a dog, I'm sorry. I'm not going to feel love and peace and feed that. I'm going to kick your ass. Welcome to The One You Feed. Throughout time, great thinkers have recognized the importance of the thoughts we have. Quotes like, garbage in, garbage out, or you are what you think, ring true. And yet, for many of us, our thoughts don't strengthen or empower us. We tend toward negativity, self-pity, jealousy, or fear. We see what we don't have instead of what we do. We think things that hold us back and dampen our spirit.

But it's not just about thinking. Our actions matter. It takes conscious, consistent, and creative effort to make a life worth living. This podcast is about how other people keep themselves moving in the right direction, how they feed their good wolf. I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together, our mission on the Really Know Really podcast is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like

why the bathroom door doesn't go all the way to the floor, what's in the museum of failure, and does your dog truly love you? We have the answer. Go to reallyknoworeally.com and register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. The Really No Really podcast.

Follow us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Thanks for joining us. Our guest this week is Johnette Napolitano, an American musician best known as the lead vocalist and songwriter and bassist for the band Concrete Blonde. Jonette is currently a resident of Joshua Tree, California. She composes music for films and works as a gallery artist, specializing in discarded and reclaimed materials.

She also takes care of rescue horses. Her latest record is called Naked, and her book is called Rough Mix. And here's the interview. Hi, Jeanette. Welcome to the show. Thank you for having me. I appreciate it. Yeah, I'm really excited to have you on. Every once in a while, we get a guest that has figured prominently in my mental landscape for a long time. And you are one of those.

You flatter me, sir. You flatter me. Your music has been a source of consolation and comfort to me for, well, longer than I'd like to admit, back since your first records came out. So it's exciting for me to get to talk with you. Well, then I've done my job. Thank you. So our podcast is called The One You Feed, and it's based on the parable of two wolves where there's a grandfather who's talking with his grandson. He says, in life, there are two wolves inside of us that are always at battle.

One is a good wolf, which represents things like kindness and bravery and love. And the other is a bad wolf, which represents things like greed and hatred and fear. And the grandson stops and he thinks about it for a second. And he looks up at his grandfather and he says, well, grandfather, which one wins? And the grandfather says, the one you feed. So I'd like to start off by asking you what that parable means to you in your life and in the work that you do. Well, that's a good one. I understand that. And I do agree with it to a point. But I don't think as a human being you can be consistent all the time. And I also would say that while you have... Let's say somebody doesn't speak the same language you do,

and you have to speak their language to make your point. and you have to speak their language to make your point. And that language is not necessarily kindness and love and poetry all the time. Some things need to be fought for, and you have to fight sometimes. I mean, this country wouldn't be here if it hadn't been fought for. On the other hand, as a human being, I want to be, and we all should want to be, kind and generous and all that, and feel love all the time. It just doesn't happen. It's not going to happen. And so it's really like surfing. I have a friend whose wife is a psychiatrist, and we've discussed this, and we call them wobbles. I call them wobbles. It's like you are not going to be consistent all the time. There are a lot of factors behind that, life factors, even astrology, which I do believe in, you know, and if it's strong enough to pull the tides and your body is mostly water, then it's strong enough to pull you. So I do keep tabs on that

stuff, but not in order to rule me. I find it consistent with the way I feel. But I've learned as a mature human being or trying to get there that I'm in control of that. And if I'm not feeling all the love today, I'm fortunate enough that I can pull back and not socialize, not be around people. I can control that. And that, I think, is the ultimate. It's all about balance. Balance is basically what it's all about. And if I feel like I'm not in the most loving mood, I've learned how to control that, or I'm very close to it. You know, I do have a lot of Italian blood in me. So, you know, I have learned that and not all people deserve my love. I'm sorry. If, you know, if somebody's kicking a dog, I'm sorry, I'm not

going to feel love and peace and feed that. I'm going to kick your ass, you know? So I really think that it's not that simple. You know, I wish it were, but it's not. Yeah, I mean, I think that what I like about that parable, I mean, there's a lot of things. I think the main thing I like is it just becomes, I think it just speaks to the fact that we have a choice in any moment to think about how we want to act and how we want to react. What you were just saying made me think of something, and I thought I'd be interested in getting your take on. So one of the things on the show that comes up a lot is there seems to be a couple of responses

to emotions that people have. I mean, on one side, there's the indulgence of the emotion, whether that be lashing out in anger or, you know, drinking ourselves into despair or, you know, watching TV. Or channeling it into art. Right. And so then there's the other end, which is repressing it, which is, oh, I don't feel that or all those different things. I think there's a middle ground. And it sounds like to you, that middle ground is channeling it into art. What are other ways that you try and find that balance between repression and indulgence in emotion? Well, a lot of it depends on what is the root of that. A lot of it is chemical.

And I'm not talking about alcohol or drugs. I'm talking about what you eat, hate, the world we live in, the excess stimulation. And now when you see what all these kids are going crazy because they're over-medicated, they're shooting up places. And that, you know, I just had an email from somebody in Australia the other day who was really hypercritical about the gun control thing and everything else, which of course is a mess. But there's always a root to that, a root to dysfunctional behavior, whether it be alcoholism, whether it be shooting up a school, whether it be anything. What is the root of it? And you have to look at that.

And it's a difficult question. And a kid doesn't know how to process these emotions or channel them in any way. That's why I think they draft 18-year-olds, because 18-year-olds are full of angst. You either want to fuck or fight, basically. And when you get them at that age, you're going to get them at that age. So it's really a very complicated question. But to me also, I've been studying dance for many, many years, flamenco, and that seems to tap into something in me, which is, you know, whatever

anger there is or rage or upset, dance is very important. But we've taken all that out. I think especially kids need to be physically active to work out that adrenaline. I learned a lot about adrenaline from a friend of mine who was a neurologist, and that can build up for years and explode when you least expect it. And as human beings, in a physiological sense, the changes that you go through, especially women, you know your body for the first trimester of your life. The second trimester is different. And then you have a whole different thing that happens, you know, after a certain period. So it's no pun intended, but it's a good one. So there's so many factors. It's just not that simple. You know, it's not that simple. And you have to have some kind of awareness. And that's difficult because if you have no guidance, you don't have that awareness. And we don't have that awareness because as long as we're processed into machines and taking our drugs and walking in line and staying in line, that's all that's expected of us, and it's not humanly possible.

It's not who we are. And if you try to deny the spiritual part of us and not feed that, getting back to the parable, what are we feeding? Are we going to feed the art side of us, the spiritual side of us, the creative side of us? Nobody's feeding that. We're cutting that back all the time. And what is left? A whole side of our brain that we're discouraged from using, that is natural, and that's just creating a monster. And it is creating monsters.

Yeah, you mentioned a little bit about shooting. And as I was going back through your catalog, I listened to God is a Bullet, which is a song. That's painfully relevant right now. I know. I was really just, this is almost more relevant now than it was when you wrote it. The green plaid jacket on the back of the chair. It's like a moment frozen forever there. Mom and dad had a lot of big plans for their little man. So proud. Mama's gone crazy cause her baby's cut down by some teenage cop. Chased war out of bounds.

It was the wrong place, wrong time, wrong end of a gun. Son, shoot straight from the hip yard. I'm all forever in a trigger slip. Well, it could have been it. Could have been your brother. Shoot straight. Shoot to kill you. brother I actually had thought of that the other day in my exchange with someone in Australia. I was just like, you know what? It's not that simple. You know, it's not that simple.

It's not just a matter of taking guns away. I know many gun owners. Hell, if you come onto my property, I'll blow you away myself. But that doesn't mean that's not the reason. I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together on the Really Know Really podcast, our mission is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like

why they refuse to make the bathroom door go all the way to the floor. We got the answer. Will space junk block your cell signal? The astronaut who almost drowned during a spacewalk gives us the answer. We talk with the scientist who figured out if your dog truly loves you. And the one bringing back the woolly mammoth. Plus, does Tom Cruise really do his own stunts? His stuntman reveals the answer.

And you never know who's going to drop by. Mr. Bryan Cranston is with us today. How are you, too? Hello, my friend. Wayne Knight about Jurassic Park. Wayne Knight, welcome to Really, Not Really, sir. Bless you all. Hello, Newman.

And you never know when Howie Mandel might just stop by to talk about judging. Really? That's the opening? Really No Really. Yeah, really. No really. Go to reallynoreally.com and register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. It's called Really No Really, and you can find it on the

iHeartRadio app, on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. You know what I mean? It's not the reason. Once again, get back to the root of it. Why is someone going on and shooting up a school as a kid? I know people out here with guns that have never had to use them, you know? Right.

But I live in a rural area, you know, and that's very, very different. And it's just not a blanket. It's not an easy solution. But taking away everybody's guns, I have to say, and having written that song, it surprises me to hear myself say that. But since I've lived out here, I know many people with guns, carry guns, always have guns, and have never shot them right so you know what is that and in the Swiss Army by the way never mind the knife they they are they have to meet weekly I think once a year they keep their guns in their homes after they're out of the army and which is mandatory service. The Swiss don't go shooting up each other, you know?

Right. With guns, anyway. But why? Why? Why not? Yeah, I think it's definitely a very nuanced debate. It's not as simple. There's no easy answers to any of these things. No, there aren't. Speaking of where you live,

I saw you in your Twitter feed sometime over the last week mentioned something about the Desert Land Trust. Could you tell me a little bit about what that is and what role you're playing there? Well, I've willed my property to the Mojave Desert Land Trust because I've lived here a while. The desert is a delicate ecosystem. It's not the wasteland people think it is. It's always alive. I've pulled four tortoises off the road since I've lived here. Never mind.

But anyway, the trend out here, because it's Joshua Tree's trendy now, is to do Airbnbs. And I was out here all by myself for a long time, and now I have people on either side of me. Everybody thought it was cool to come out and flip property. Well, it's not that simple either. But people don't know how to be in the desert, and it's ruining, ruining the ecology of the desert. And never mind the carnage that I've seen on the road, human and animal, of people that don't know how to be, how to drive. They come out here and get their party on. I just got on somebody's case about them not living here and coming up and

selling LSD at the music festival. That's not cool at all. People die from that. Those kids are young. You're not going to blow into my neighborhood and sell LSD at the music festival and then blow out. It's not going to happen. And boy, I got ripped a new one for that, but I don't care. I'll stand up for that. That's not right. These kids are too young. You shouldn't be taking stuff like that at that age anyway, or any age for that matter. I've seen it do the damage that it does. And the desert at its best is a very volatile environment. It's a harsh environment. If you don't know how to be here, whether you're on drugs or not, it's easy to get lost within five feet of your car, you know? And I know people

that have done it who know the desert. You know, you get a dust storm in here, you're screwed. You know, you can't find it. And it's just really a harsh environment. It doesn't take long to get sunstroke and die and wander off because it all looks the same. If you're not from here, you don't know where you are. And I know search and rescue. I know what they go through. I know people who train the Black Rock Rangers, you know, who go to Burning Man to look after people and the emergency stuff there. You just got to be careful.

And people don't know how to do that. And it's a very – so anyway, I thought the best thing to do, and I've been talking about it a long time, but since I'm not 21 anymore, and when my dad passed, God bless him, and he's never far from me, didn't leave a will, and it was a bit of a mess. And I decided nobody likes to think about making a will because none of us want to think about dying. But you know what? I've seen enough out here in a split second. You know, people go down, people die. It happens all the time. And I want my stuff straight. And I'm

probably, I think I'm the first one in my family to really ever have done that. And the Mojave Desert Land Trust has acquired great tracts of land, a lot of land, and the single reason is for preservation. And I thought, what better could I do with my five acres? I only have one acre fenced off, but the four acres that I have need to be left alone. And that is what I want. That was my intention when I bought my place. That is my intention when I leave, and that's what's going to happen. And I was just proud to do that. I was really nervous because, like I said, nobody wants to make a will. This is me.

I'm going to die. And no, but I do go on tour. I do get on planes. I do have less and less confidence about that whole thing. Am I going to land? Am I going to make it? You know, I mean, I kiss the ground whenever I come home, even just going to the store because I've seen, uh, I've seen such horrible shit on the highway, you know? So I really was proud to do that. And I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm pleased that they were glad about it, you know, and I'll probably be, I'll probably be playing, um, a show in the

building, uh, before the end of the year. So I'm, I'm really, I was really, it really made me feel good to do that. I felt like I was doing something definitely worthwhile. Well, that's, that's wonderful. One of the songs, if I had to say, it was one of your very early songs, and yet I think it, it speaks for you, kind of who you've been and who you've remained for so long is true. That's my horse's name. Oh, okay. Well, so clearly it's... I have it tattooed on my left hand, T-R-U-W,

so when I play guitar, you get to see that. Yeah, yeah, and you've written, you know, there's the original True, which is one of my favorite songs of all time. Thank you. Then there's, you've got the instrumental version, and then you did True 3. The reason that, I need to interject,

that the music was written by Jim Mankey. Okay. And he gave me a cassette of music that included Bad as a Bullet, which he wrote the music for, and included True. And he hated it. He hated it. He didn't like it. And I said, this is so good. I'm not only going to put it on the record once, I'm putting it on twice. He hated that. put it on the record once. I'm putting it on twice. He hated that. So it was a good check and balance system. But the credit for that song definitely goes to him. But you put the lyrics to it. Yes. Sometimes the reason seems so very far away.

But I'll stop breathing today. But if I can't walk right around the walk away. I do what I have and it's all I can do. I'm through And I actually had one record executive who is, well, the record business isn't what it used to be. And this is why. Because the dude was, I mean, hugely important VP who actually told me that I couldn't write songs and Jim Mankey couldn't play guitar and he couldn't write songs either. And, you know, there's not much I know in the world, but I just looked at him and went, what the hell are you doing in this job? And turned around and slapped him in. And I away from a major major record deal and at the time i was i think i was 32 or 33 and then what went around town was that i was getting old and that's uh yeah i think

about that now it cracks me up but it wasn't funny then but i stuck up for it and i'm glad that you appreciate that song as much as I do. And that was the reason for the lyrics of that song is because we had been rejected by everybody. And I had, you know, it was a lot of soul searching. And I just said, if I can't, if I can't make the music that is in my heart that comes to me, then I just don't want to do it at all. I'd rather, you know, work, you know, anywhere else. I'd rather go back to waitressing, you know? Yep. So a lot of times on the show, we talk a lot about, you know, life is paradoxical. What paradox or contradiction in your life

have you had to learn to accept or embrace? Hmm, let's see. Which ones? All of it? You know, a recent paradox is, you know, I've wondered, living out here for as long as I have and taking myself out of Hollywood, the city I was born in, am I missing out on anything? The answer is no, I'm not missing out on anything. But a very strange thing happened recently. I was listening to Brian Eno radio, and I heard this beautiful piece of piano music. And for the first time in my life that I can remember, I went, who is this? And went over and wrote it down, and it was Harold Budd. And I said, wow. And I posted something on my Facebook and said, I'm listening to Harold Budd music. Well, I got an email two days later from his son,

Terrence, that said, you know, we're doing a retrospective on my dad's work. And they're one of the first names that came up. And I was amazed because not only has Harold Budd worked with Eno, Fripp, all kinds of people, but he's had a house up near the National Park for the last 10 years. He lived here forever. And I'm like, how did I not know you were here? And Harold and I are working on a beautiful book, and he came out and recorded at my house, and we have gorgeous music. And I'm just thinking, now that's one of the strangest things that's ever happened. So I don't think it matters, especially in this day and age where a lot of people can get really, especially my age, can get really down on the internet and on the Facebook and

all that sort of stuff. But the role that social media has played, I mean, politically, socially, just, I mean, just on every, it's a tool and you can use it the way you want, you know, but that was the strangest thing to happen to me for a long time because Harold and I should have known each other for years. And he's just like, oh my God, we're just soulmates. And he's just wonderful. So that is one of the paradoxes. It's like the further you get away, the closer you are. I found that amazing. I found that absolutely amazing. And I think that's an example. Life is, like you say, life is full of them. And there's just that mystery.

You know, the mystery is what makes life worth living, really. You know, we're not going to know it, you know. But that was a great example of, like, am I missing something? Not only was I not missing anything, but here is a man who was a professor at CalArts. And I always felt bad that I never got to go to college because my parents divorced. He's not only a professor, he's a professor at one of the best art schools in the world. And he's my best friend. And here we are collaborating. And I just can't get over that. I still can't get over that. I was going to ask you about that. There's some really lovely pictures of the two of you guys

out there at your place recording. Looks like it's so much fun. Will the rest of us get to hear that music at any point? this because, you know, I went to Pasadena where Harrop spends most of his time. He had a fall, so his son isn't that crazy about him driving around by himself like a madman, although he does anyway. I can't keep up with him and he's going to be 80 years old. I love that. So, yeah. Oh, no, it's just amazing. But yes, we will. But we'll figure out how to do it, how to do it right. We want to do a live performance out here in the desert. And I would love to do it at the Mojave Desert Land Trust. And I talked to the parents about that.

And so we're talking about quite a few things to do this fall. Absolutely. Excellent. Well, you've got a new three-song EP out. And one of the songs on it is called Here. Yes. I know I'm complicated. And I'm sorry for all that All the love I try to make

Comes out half-baked It just falls flat I'm a little bit of mess But a lot of love at heart Sometimes I just can't stop Sometimes I just can't stop Well, I never had a map. I never had a plan. All I have is facts of who and why I think I am. And I am a little less. And you are a little more and I've never really seen my life in quite this light before.

But if you ever call me, no, I will be here. And if you ever want me, no, I will be here. And if you ever need me, no know I will be here. I know what you need. And all you need from me is for me to be here. In quite a safer place. Can you tell me about that song? I really like it.

Yes. Can you tell me about that song? I really like it. Yes, that's a paradox. There was a relationship I would have really loved to maintain, but I couldn't live in L.A. anymore for many, many reasons. And creatively, financially, my father passed away and he helped build a lot of Hollywood. I mean, he put neon signs on the top of the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel and several landmarks. And it's kind of I've got to get over really being there, but I don't want to live there anymore. It looks more like New York than Hollywood now. And moving out of the city was a drag because I had to forfeit some time with somebody I really wanted to spend time with. And the only message that I can say is that, you know, whenever you want, I'll be here. That's all.

I'll just be here. And I've never felt like that about a relationship in my life. It's a very unconditional thing. And I guess that means that maybe finally I'm maybe maturing, although I never... Maturing and growing up are two different things. Yeah. But that was, that was what I meant. And I mean, it's like, you know, if you ever want me, I'll be here and I'm no conditions, no rules, no nothing. But if you ever need me, I will never

be away from you. And I've, that's more than, uh, most married people say to each other, you know, or even do. So, uh, do. So I was pretty happy making that statement. You know, I'm not happy, but I mean, just satisfied, you know, fulfilled making that statement. Just being able to say that no matter what you do on your own time, I just don't care. But if ever you need me, I will be here. Yep. That's a beautiful sentiment. So what do you do? You know, we were

talking earlier about emotions, you know, we all get down or, or feel sad. What are the things that you do to find comfort when, when you're feeling that way? Pick up my guitar. Yep. Yep. That's what I do. And, and, uh, and that's it. Everybody perceives me as this sad, tragic person and I'm not, but if, because if the weather's good, I'm going to be out playing with my horse. I'm going to be out painting. I'm going to be out, you know, pounding tin or, you know, sculpting or something. And it's a drag, too, because the weather's almost always great here. But it's not.

But it's the first thing. I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together on the Really No Really podcast, our mission is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like why they refuse to make the bathroom door go all the way to the floor. We got the answer.

Will space junk block your cell signal? The astronaut who almost drowned during a spacewalk gives us the answer. We talk with the scientist who figured out if your dog truly loves you and the one bringing back the woolly mammoth. Plus, does Tom Cruise really do his own stunts? His stuntman reveals the answer. And you never know who's going to drop by.

Mr. Bryan Cranston is with us today. How are you, too? Hello, my friend. Wayne Knight about Jurassic Park. Wayne Knight, welcome to Really, No Really, sir. Bless you all. Hello, Newman. And you never know when Howie Mandel might just stop by

to talk about judging. Really? That's the opening? Really No Really. Yeah, really. No really. Go to reallynoreally.com and register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. It's called Really No Really, and you can find it on the iHeartRadio app, on Apple Podcasts,

or wherever you get your podcasts. If I'm sad about anything, and that is a very human thing, it's normal, I pick up my guitar and I write a song, because that's soothing. And it's channeling in a productive way. You know, I've been talking about it for years, but I finally wrote a Christmas song. And I posted it for my dad. And I was really happy to do that, you know, because I've never done it. I've always wanted to do it. Always wanted to do a Christmas song.

And finally did that. So it's just therapy. That's why music therapy is so essential. Music and dance therapy is absolutely essential. And it's therapeutic for. That's why music therapy is so essential. Music and dance therapy is absolutely essential. And it's therapeutic for me. It really is. But I'm not sad all the time. It's just that's when I need to make music. That's when I need to play. And it's been difficult because in the Concrete Blonde days, especially when we did the Bloodletting album, oh my God, to go out and play that every night, I'm a bit of a method actor when it comes to performance.

I don't believe in faking it. And I can't just sit there and strum away. It's tough for me. Touring is tough for me. It's always been tough. But to go out and play that record for a year, Jesus, I was suicidal. I mean, it was just tough, you know, to relive all that stuff every night was really difficult. It was just, I was just crying all the time, you know, but I can't fake

it. I just can't. I either have to feel it all, and people know the difference, you know, they know the difference. You know, if I go out and clock it in, I'll be called on it. And rightfully so. You know, if I can't get out there and give 150 percent, everything. You know, it's not you know, they said something about Marlon Brando that when he wasn't acting, he should have been kept in a cage. And that's probably that probably applies to me as well. A desert cage at this point. Yeah, but it's all right. So you were just talking about bloodletting and there's a, you know, the song that you're probably best known for is Joey on that, on that record. And I've always related with that song. I've related to it as a recovering drug addict and

alcoholic as, as I related to it as the Joey in that song. I've related to it as a recovering drug addict and alcoholic as, as I used to wonder why I used to cry till I was dry Still sometimes I get a strange pain inside Oh, tell me if you heart is so alive. There's been a lot of speculation about who that song was about, and you can feel free to defer this question. It's in my book. It's in my book, Left Mix. Go get it. I read it. Mark Moreland. And then I went along to read that he passed.

When you wrote Joey, was it before or after he passed? Before. Okay. So that song is even more tragic. What a great time we had, or something like that was the final line, something to that extent, looking back on your time together. We had a good time. Yeah. Yeah. So does that song, has that song gotten harder for you to play after he passed?

Nope. Much easier. Okay. What is the lesson in your life that you think is taking you the longest to learn? That it could end any minute. I just lost a very dear friend, Octavio Hernandez Diaz, who is a major, major, major journalist in Mexico, music journalist, but more than that, he was a very dear friend and passionate about life and a brilliant writer. friend and passionate about life and a brilliant writer. And his wife was also a very dear friend of mine and how this came very strange. What happened is Rafa, she's a brilliant jeweler, just doesn't have a bad bone in her body. The woman is a saint. And she was struck by paralysis and nobody knows why. And so Octavio was putting on all these amazing gigs in Tijuana with all these major, major bands. And he had written me saying, can you send this? Can you help out? And I said, of course, of course. And I drove around and finally found a Western And, you know, Octavio just stopped breathing and died out of nowhere one day. And it just ripped all of us apart. And Rosalba is a typical thing, apologized that he didn't pick the money up. My God, you know, that's so typical of her, you know.

But, you know, that's so typical of her, you know. But that came out of nowhere. And the carnage I've seen on this highway, Highway 62, has got to be one of the most dangerous highways in the world. And what I've seen on this highway is that somebody went to work one day, got slammed off his motorcycle. I just don't want to get too deep into that because that's where the control comes in. I don't want to upset myself. I've seen it. I was there. It's cool. It just happens all the time,

every day, all the time out here. And, you know, gone through people's stuff when they've passed away, when there were no provisions made. I mean, you know, I've done it two or three times with different people and that every minute is your last minute. And if you don't appreciate it and treat it right, you don't deserve it. Yeah, that's such a powerful statement and so hard for so many. Or it's so hard to know that intellectually. Or it's easy to know that intellectually. And it's a lot harder to really take that in and learn to appreciate every moment. I know that I wrestle with that.

Yes. Well, it's easy to, you know, you've got to let the past be the past. The only thing is the present. I mean, even on a physics level, you know, the only thing is the present. You know, there is no future. There is no past. There's only now. And all these little moments make our lives. And every little moment is important. And it is difficult to digest. And I think that calls for a certain amount of experience or a certain amount of, there are people who know that, you know, people who send their sons and husbands away and wives away to war know that. And the things that you remember are always the little things. You know, if you're laying there dying,

you can remember the little things, not the big things that they call accomplishments in, in, in this time that we live in and what we're encouraged to do. I was talking to somebody who really got sick, um, the other day and he's going in, you know, just got a promotion and has a huge job and, and just a huge responsibility and certain all of a sudden you're sick. And, you know, I was joking around and we were joking around. I'm like, who's racing faster to death, you or me? Let's go, let's go, let's accomplish, let's accomplish, let's make more money, let's make more money, let's go, let's go, let's go.

Who's going to die first? It's a race. And that's pretty much what it is, you know. And to slow down literally means to slow down time, you know, and, and, and to slow down literally means to slow down time. You know, um, the thing that, the thing that has struck me because I like to be out for a week out of the month, but you have to work when you're touring, you have to work three months in advance. I mean, I think I'm, I know what I'm doing in February and I used to get tremendous anxiety over that. Like, Oh my God, February. Oh, geez, February. What am I going to do? Who am I going to get to watch the horse? What am I going to do? And then I'm just like, whatever, you know, I'm not going to worry about February if I don't know if I'm going to make it through today. And it's up to

God whether I make it through today, not me. So I've learned to manage that anxiety. But I see that whether people are planning weddings, whether they're planning vacations, but they're planning, planning, planning. And I think John Lennon ripped off the Dalai Lama when he said life is what happens when you're making other plans. Well, it is, you know, and and I've learned to just kick back and just go today. We'll take care of itself. And I'm just going to enjoy. I have an hour. I mean, I can wake up in a hotel and, and checkout time is 11. And if I have 20 minutes to sit there by myself, I'm like, this is going to be the best 20 minutes ever. My favorite piece of time. And it is, you know, I can, I can get more in five

minutes. I can get more out of it than a lot of people can. And that's one of the reasons I did move out. As a matter of fact, the reason I did move out of LA was because I found most of my quality time sitting in traffic. And I realized that God did not invent me to sit in traffic all day. And this is just not right. This isn't good. This isn't real life. If I'm going to point A and point B, I want to get from point A to point B. If I'm going to point A and point B, I want to get from point A to point B. I don't want to have to sit there in the twilight zone of whatever. And it just wasn't normal to me. It wasn't right. It wasn't holistic. And I had to leave. And to leave one's hometown, it depends on where you're from, but I do love

Hollywood very much. And so it's not that far away, but it's not the same and it's still too much traffic. You know, I just can't deal with it. I just feel like I'm sitting here wasting my time. I mean, you're supposed to spend a third of your life sleeping anyway, you know, and I'm grateful if I can do that because sleeping is pretty much, a friend of mine said back in the 90s, sleep will be the new sex of the new millennium. You'll be lucky if you get any. That's awesome. Yeah, I know.

And he was right. And I got to say, that's just a priority. You know, I'm up at five and I try to be in bed by 10. If I wake up at three, that's cool, which I usually do. And if I want to go back to sleep for an hour, that's cool. But I feel like I'm fortunate enough to pay attention to my body's rhythms. And I don't think that we have that luxury anymore in the culture that we're in. A lot of people do not, that is for sure. I don't, certainly at points.

Yeah, yeah. Well, Jeanette, thanks so much for taking the time. I've really enjoyed this conversation. Like I said, I've been a big fan of your music, so thank you for all that. Thank you. I really appreciate it. Thank you very much, and good luck with everything. Thanks. Take care. Bye-bye. You too. Bye. you can learn more about Johnette Napolitano

and this podcast and find links to the songs that are featured in this episode at oneufeed.net slash Johnette