The One You Feed - Lewis Howes

Episode Date: June 25, 2014

This week on The One You Feed we have Lewis Howes.I first talked with Lewis when he reached out to us shortly after our launch of the show to introduce himself. He noticed we were from Columbus, Ohio where he used to live. It was a truly kind gesture and it was awesome for us to talk with someone so successful in the podcasting world. He invited us to join his excellent podcasting network, The Integrity Network.We were lucky enough to make this another in person interview. We visited Lewis in his West Hollywood apartment. Lewis is one of those people who seem to have it all together and have the perfect life. But it wasn't always that way for him. He grew up feeling alone and like he didn't belong. He suffered awful childhood sexual abuse. He had a great deal of trouble learning to read, he thought he was stupid.  An injury ended his athletic career at.Like all people, he has faced adversity. In our conversation he discusses how he has overcome that adversity. He also names the ability to overcome adversity as the trait that most stands out from all the amazing people he has talked with on his podcast, School of Greatness.We had a lot of great discussion before and after the podcast. Lewis pressed me on some decisions I make in my life and gave me a lot to think about. He was generous, kind and extremely helpful and suppotive.In This Interview Lewis and I Discuss...The One You Feed parable.The importance of the environments we place ourselves in.Feeding the bad wolf.Learning to come from a place of kindness versus defensiveness.Growth mindset vs the fixed mindset.The importance of perspective.Avoiding the victim mindset.Using inner and outer feedback.How to be a better communicator.Not taking things personally.His definition of greatness.The poison of comparison.Growing more resilient and courageous.Turning things into a game.The goal of life.Falling in love with pain.Using pain to get stronger.Not resisting.His adventure with the US National Handball team.His upcoming book.His dream of being an Olympian.The key to success=consistency.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Every day I try to do a couple of things that are extremely painful for me, either emotionally, mentally, or physically. Welcome to The One You Feed. Throughout time, great thinkers have recognized the importance of the thoughts we have. Quotes like, garbage in, garbage out, or you are what you think, ring true. And yet, for many of us, or you are what you think ring true. And yet, for many of us, our thoughts don't strengthen or empower us. We tend toward negativity, self-pity, jealousy, or fear. We see what we don't have instead of what we do.

We think things that hold us back and dampen our spirit. But it's not just about thinking. Our actions matter. It takes conscious, consistent, and creative effort to make a life worth living. This podcast is about how other people keep themselves moving in the right direction, how they feed their good wolf. I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together, our mission on the Really Know Really podcast is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like...

Why the bathroom door doesn't go all the way to the floor? What's in the museum of failure? And does your dog truly love you? We have the answer. Go to reallynoreally.com. And register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. The Really No Really podcast. Follow us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Thanks for joining us. Our guest today is Lewis Howes, a former professional football player, two-sport All-American world record-holding athlete, and current USA men's national team athlete for the Olympic sport team handball. and is also the host of the hugely popular podcast called The School of Greatness. We got to visit Lewis in his Los Angeles apartment shortly before he left to play for the United States handball team in Brazil. Hey, Lewis, welcome to the show. Thanks so much, man. How are you? I'm great. I don't get the pleasure of sitting right across from somebody that often, so this is pretty cool. And sitting here in your Hollywood studio looking out over the beautiful view. Thanks. Thanks.

Thanks for coming out. Yep. Not just for me, but. Yeah. So our show is called The One You Feed, and it's based on the parable of two wolves where there's a grandfather who's talking with his grandson, and he says, in life, there are two wolves inside of us. One is a good wolf, which represents things like kindness and love and joy. And the other is a bad wolf, which represents things like kindness and love and joy. And the other is a bad wolf, which represents things like hatred and greed and fear.

And the grandson stops and he thinks, he says, well, grandfather, which one wins? And the grandfather says, the one you feed. So I'd like to start off by asking you what that parable means to you in your life and in the work that you do. I feed my good wolf in a number of different ways. One, it's my environment. And I've had a number of different environments I've lived in my entire life from, you know, sleeping on couches for many, many months and years to now living in a nice place. But the environment to me is extremely important. Sometimes it doesn't necessarily matter where

the environment is, but who's in that environment with me and that type of energy. So I really like to, even when I'm sleeping on couches or not sure where I'm going to live or whatever it may be, as long as I'm surrounding myself with the right ideas and the right people, I my opinion, is a big benefit to the good wolf, I guess, and making sure that he is fed well. So I've tried to, each year, figure out ways to improve my environment with the people, thoughts, and physical surroundings that I'm in so that I can be on the track of achieving what I want. Excellent. One of the things I heard you say recently was that in the past you used to come from a place of, and this really gets, I think, to intention, you used to come from a place of anger or trying to prove people wrong. Or I've heard you tell stories about, you know, being a little kid and not picked to be on the particular dodgeball team or this thing and how that sort of drove you to a higher level. And yet that you found later as you went on that you might achieve certain things and

yet there'd be a sense of emptiness. And I'm curious about how you have sort of come to a different place and what informs your intentions these days. Yeah. So I think as a kid growing up, I wanted to feed the good wolf all the time, but the bad wolf would come out. And coming from this place of anger or resentment or needing to prove someone wrong, that I was right and they were wrong, that would definitely come out a lot. And it drove me to achieving certain things, but it always left me feeling unfulfilled and left me feeling unsatisfied or empty. And so I started to recognize when I became aware of what was

happening over just my childhood and growing up, I realized that when I would feed the bad wolf and think that way, it would never leave me feeling good. So I started to shift out of it and recognize, and there was an experience about a year ago where I started talking about getting raped as a child and how that affected the bad wolf and affected me being really resistant towards people, really standoffish, guarded, protecting myself, defensive. And I think that's what held me back in a lot of ways emotionally and feeling connected to myself and other people. So once I started to become aware of what I was doing and why I was doing it based on these occurrences when I was a kid, I started to have this freedom. And it was

like, I didn't need to feed the bad wolf anymore. I could just be happy with the good wolf and be like satisfied and feed him to drive me wherever I want to go. And since then, in the last year, it's been the most incredible experiences of just feeling free, feeling like there's no such thing as a mistake or something that's bad or wrong. It's all a lesson. And so I've really shifted my mindset towards anything that seems like it's going wrong is more of an amazing experience and opportunity for growth for how I can move forward.

Yeah, as we were right before we came in and we were sitting here, we talked briefly about a book you've got sitting here. And you were talking about the growth mindset versus the fixed mindset. That ties in a little bit to, I think what you were saying. Yeah. Yeah. And I think, uh, again, coming from a place of perspective, like, okay. Um, you know, I've got to move out of my place for six months. Like I could be upset or I could be frustrated or I could be, you know, confused and mad, or I can look at it as an opportunity look at all the cool places maybe i can go live in the hollywood hills maybe i can go travel europe maybe i can go do this so looking at as an opportunity to uncover new things to connect with people in different places

to experience a new journey and see new possibilities as opposed to being upset that i get to move out or that i have to and becoming, coming from place of a victim where the fixed mindset is. I've also read something that you talked about feedback. You talk about inner and outer feedback and how important that is in leading a better life. What, what do you mean by that? So I, again, I used to be fed by the bad wolf and, uh, I used to be fed by the bad wolf. And I used to take feedback extremely personally. I used to be so insecure about feedback as opposed to welcoming it constantly. And it's shifted a lot in the last few years where I welcome feedback. I think still sometimes my ego might flare up and I might be like, try to get defensive.

And if someone gives me feedback, I might try to be like, well, this is the reason I was doing it and be, you know, justify myself. But really I look at it as like, okay, feedback is telling me what's working for me and what's not working for me and what works for other people and what doesn't work for them. So for an example, I'll just talk about content on my site. There might be an article that I put out there that some people, it hits a trigger with them. And sometimes I'll get like a lot of emails from people saying, you know, I didn't like how you wrote about this. I didn't like what you said about this. Just to let you know, your grammar is off on your blog post or whatever.

I get feedback all the time from people about whatever bothers them. And I can look at it as screw you. Like I didn't ask for your feedback in the first place. This is my stuff. Like I don't care what you think. Or I can welcome it and say, thank you for the feedback. Thank you for acknowledging what it is that was upsetting you or that you liked. So that I'm aware of what's working for you or what's not working for you, as opposed to what's right or wrong, good or bad. I look at it as what's working or what's not working for someone. And I look at that in every instance in my life now with relationships specifically. So if someone is reacting in a certain way with something I say or with something I do or something I don't do,

you know, specifically with women, right? If they react in a certain way or whatever, they're upset or they're not upset. I get to look at it as, okay, am I communicating effectively so that what I'm trying to get across is working or am I not communicating effectively? And based on people's reactions, I get to see if I'm an effective communicator or not. And if what I'm trying to land is landing. And since I've removed my ego a lot, and I take it out of myself and just kind of put it here and just hold it in my hand. So when someone reacts or says something, or if I feel like they're responding to whatever I'm doing,

instead of me thinking that you're reacting to me personally, to myself, where my ego used to be inside of me, I now take my ego out of myself. I just kind of put it in my hand and I have them directing it towards this. And I say, okay, they're giving me feedback towards this. And it doesn't bother me anymore because I've removed it from myself. And I look at it differently and I don't react really that much anymore to feedback. I look at it and say, okay, it's not working for this. So how can I switch it around so that it works for that person and it works for me? And I look at feedback in a lot of ways, you know, the inner feedback, my feelings, but also the physical feedback. So where's my body at right now? Every moment is it's, am I tired? Am I exhausted? Am I

gaining weight? Am I losing weight? How is that affecting my business, my relationships? I look at everything as feedback now. That's really interesting about the dealing with feedback, particularly in relationships, because my habitual pattern is to immediately start defending myself and not even realizing that they're trying to communicate a message to me. And I'm not hearing the message at all, right? I'm hearing, how does this affect me? How am I threatened by this? I didn't do anything wrong. And what you're saying is a really, really powerful thing to be more. And a lot of what you just talked about is, I think, mindfulness in general, right? Paying attention to what's actually happening in the moment.

And, you know, I'm only 31. And although I feel like I've had a lot of life experience and many different relationships, I'm still just scratching the surface on being mindful. And every time I think I've got it figured out, that's when I'm like, okay, I need to dive even deeper and humble myself and continue to dive deeper into gratitude for where I'm at and the lessons I get to continue to learn

and realize that I'm still just like figuring it all out and I don't have all the answers. So for me, it's more of like appreciating the journey don't have all the answers. So for me, it's more of like appreciating the journey and every step along the way. I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together on the Really No Really podcast, our mission is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like why they refuse to make the bathroom door go all the way to the floor.

We got the answer. Will space junk block your cell signal? The astronaut who almost drowned during a spacewalk gives us the answer. We talk with the scientist who figured out if your dog truly loves you and the one bringing back the woolly mammoth. Plus, does Tom Cruise really do his own stunts? His stuntman reveals the answer. And you never know who's going to drop by. Mr. Brian Cranston is with us today. How are you,

too? Hello, my friend. Wayne Knight about Jurassic Park. Wayne Knight, welcome to Really No Really, sir. Bless you all. Hello, Newman. And you never know when Howie Mandel might just stop by to talk about judging. Really? That's the opening? Really, no really. Yeah, really. No really. Go to reallynoreally.com. And register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. It's called Really, No Really, and you can find it on the iHeartRadio app, on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. There's another phrase that I've heard you use somewhere and it basically said realize that failure does not equal you being a loser and i think that ties to what what you're

saying here a lot right that being able to what can i learn from that failure but also and you talked about things not being personal the idea that a failure that happens is not an indictment of i think what you're saying of me as a person, it's an indictment of the methods I'm taking to go about achieving something. Yeah. And I used to take everything really personally when I would fail, quote unquote, I would feel like a loser instantly. And that was one of the things that drove me to being, I wanted to be great at everything. So I would throw my entire being into mastering every skill that I wanted to learn. And that was like the bad wolf that was being fed to be successful, to learn things quickly so that I wouldn't fail at them and so that other people wouldn't give me negative feedback or

whatever. Now I don't take things personally as much anymore. And I think when I would take things personally, it was just like so unfulfilling I just felt so lonely constantly I just remember feeling so alone as a child and growing up very frustrated and wondering why I didn't feel accepted or why I didn't have friends and yeah I just let go of that taking things personally it just didn't serve me anymore how do you go from that because I think what you're describing is is insecurity is fear, and this idea that if I just do enough things, if I accomplish enough things, if I'm good enough, then I will feel good inside. And I think you have said, well, that didn't really work. How do you make that shift to, because it's confidence, but it's also not confidence. I don't know what the right word

is. Because I'm getting the sense that what you're saying is that take accomplishments aside, you don't have to accomplish all these things to feel okay about who you are. How do you, how have you gotten there? It's interesting because I don't think I would have known how to get there unless I had some support from other people and guiding me along the way. I think I'd, you know, I'm 31 and I think I would have been still frustrated for another five, 10 years unless I had support from other people who are aware that I was frustrated and I was spending all, you know, I achieved everything I ever wanted pretty much and it was unhappy. So I was just like, why is there a disconnect of me wanting to do these things? Why do I want to do these things? So I just started to become

more aware of it and mindful. And really for me, it was having the support of friends and family who were always stood by me and challenged me in a loving way and would ask me a lot of questions and ask me why, you know, I'm frustrated or why am I sad and, um, doing a lot of the, the growth work myself, like diving in and trying to understand myself. I spend a lot of money and time going to workshops, conferences, hiring coaches, and, uh, diving in for, to learn more about myself. That's how I figured it out. On your show, you ask all your guests what their definition of greatness is. So I'll turn it back on you. What is your definition of greatness? I think it's involving for me all the time,

but my definition of greatness right now is always giving my best in every moment possible and coming from a place of service and a place of unconditional love. And if I feel like if I do that every single day and I'm making a difference in someone's life, then that's greatness to me. What I like about that, I think, is that anybody can do it. Yeah. At any place you are in your life, wherever you are, because I think that's one of the things that I've been thinking a lot about lately is how poisonous comparison is to us. Oh my gosh. Because we could be sitting here and looking out your window and you've got this beautiful place and you're thinking, God, Lewis has got it all right. Because we could be sitting here and looking out your window and you've got this beautiful place and you're thinking,

God, Lewis has got it all, right? But you could turn your head to the left and look up on that hill, right? And they've got something twice as much. And those people could turn and that chain goes up and down endlessly. And I've just spent a lot of time thinking about how poisonous that is. Because even if I'm looking up, I'm jealous. And if I'm looking down i'm i don't know what i am but i'm not i'm not connected either way i'm i'm comparing i'm not

connecting with anybody yeah i mean i think i've been really blessed and grateful to want to come from a small town in ohio so you guys can relate to me on this and just uh not really having like luxury as a kid, just growing up very humble and grateful. And then being humbled by having an injury after I was like, you know, the biggest ego in the world playing professional football and thought I had it all figured out and losing that all. And then living on my sister's couch for about a year and a half, not having, not being able to afford anything. I didn't have any money. I didn't know how to make money and feeling helpless. I think that really humbled me to just be grateful for anything and grateful for the couch and grateful for the macaroni and cheese that my sister gives me as scraps. Right. And, uh, not be ungrateful.

So, uh, I think it's again, creating perspective in myself is which allowed me to not compare. Because I could be like, yeah, I'm doing, you know, I like where I'm at right now. But to someone like a Mark Cuban, they might laugh at what I'm making or creating, right? It's like, oh, I can do that. And it's not my fingers. So letting go of trying to like, you know, compare myself to other people, it doesn't work for me. So I just let it go it go right i think that gets back to the theme we've sort of been talking about about being internally focused on how i feel inside because external focus like like we just said you can there's always a positive and negative external comparison yeah always always and and uh i know when i'm in that space i am profoundly profoundly unhappy. Yeah. It's not fun to compare.

When I used to come to LA, I used to have a lot of that. Really? Yeah, I would come to LA and I would see there's so much money here, right? I mean, it's crazy. And once I learned to sort of do less of that, I began to really appreciate LA as a wonderful place. Yeah. Yeah. You've interviewed a lot of really fabulous people.

interviewed a lot of really fabulous people. If you had to try, and this is not an easy question, but boil that down to what is the one characteristic that seems to define those people, what do you think it would be? I would say overcoming adversity is probably the main thing. Some of the people that come to mind is Kyle Maynard, born without arms and legs and grew up in a society where everyone around him was able-bodied and he had to crawl everywhere. And he climbed Mount Kilimanjaro on his elbows for 12 days to the top. And he fought in a UFC fight against someone with arms and legs and just got pummeled on his back and has done some incredible things. He does CrossFit. He lives with no excuse mindset. Everything, he figures out a way to do it. I think about just people with all the extreme

adversity that they've had to face that I've interviewed and what it took for them to overcome those adversities to get to where they are. I really think that's kind of been the key for a lot of people I've interviewed and their success. What powers that in people? Because that's not a common skill, right? It is not something, but I think it's one that everybody would like to have. I mean, your show, my show, there's a lot of people out there listening

who feel they're in a place of adversity of some sort and may not feel that they have that courage. So what are some things you would throw out there as ways to build that? Because I don't think it's, I don't think it's, you're born with it. I hope not anyway, right? I think it's a internal game that a lot of people play and they feed a couple, you know, they feed each of the wolves at different times. And, uh, you know, I wouldn't be able to speak for them necessarily, but I can speak for myself that the, the bad wolf, when I would feed, it had a lot of drive and a lot of passion to, to get what I wanted. And it was like unstoppable feeling. It was like another being when I would feed that wolf. Um, but then it would leave me with a, an empty

feeling. But the, now when I feed the good wolf, it's like, I feel this drive and passion in a whole different way. It's unstoppable in like a loving way as opposed to, uh, I don't know, a fearful way. And, uh, I think a lot of people that I've interviewed have fed both of those wolves and they started to shift from the bad one to the good one. And then that just overtakes like this momentum for them. Once they start to do that shift and come from a better place of abundance, a place of love, a place of inspiration, this momentum takes over and everyone starts to see that and it just starts to blow up for them.

Yeah. Momentum is such a, such a big thing. It's funny, like a good example, Chris, my co-host here, he's been, he's been working out six days a week for quite a while now when it used to be so hard to do it at all. But once you get going, it just rolls. He's out lifting cinder blocks by the pool this morning, right? Just to keep it going. Whereas when you're at a dead stop, is it hard to get moving? It's really tough. You've said elsewhere that the goal is not to make life easy, but to keep growing. We've talked a lot on the show about the idea of comfort, that comfort is not the same thing

as happiness. And I think you're saying the same thing there. Can you share a little bit more about how you put that to work? success. And what I, what I talked about was falling in love with pain. And every day I try to do a couple of things that are extremely painful for me, either emotionally, mentally, or physically. And I usually do this in the gym because that's the easiest place to do it. I try to push myself so to the edge of exhaustion or, uh, muscle fatigue or where I'm about to throw up or something where I feel so uncomfortable. I do this in relationships. I'm like, shoot, I really don't want to have this conversation with this person right now.

I really do not want to talk about this. And then like, that's when I need to do it. Okay. It's, it feels painful. My heart is pounding. I need to call this person. I've talked to this person right now and confront this conversation, whatever it is. I really don't want to talk to my family member and tell them about getting raped as a kid. I was feeling that when it was coming up for me. I was like, this is a painful thought. So let me do it. And what I've learned personally is the more pain I experience, my body, my mind, my emotions expand to take on so much more that doesn't affect me that it used to when I was a teenager or something. That little things, now I can just take on so many little or big things and absorb them or just let them bounce off me without it affecting me. Whereas I see other people, any little thing,

they react or they get frustrated. They're like, oh, the world is over. And I'm just like, that's because you haven't built up enough pain endurance. So I really try to get out of my comfort zone as much as possible and experience as much pain. As weird as that sounds, but the more pain I experience, the more I can endure and create in the world without anything affecting me. It's the mindset of you're thinking of pain as a positive in that case, right? You're not. And another thing I've been thinking a lot about lately is resistance. Like, it's a Buddhist concept, right, that says it's not the thing that happens,

it's how I react to it. But that is... I've just been trying to play with that lately of noticing like, okay, I am resisting whatever this thing is. And if I just don't resist it, if I sort of notice it or think about it, but don't fight it, it's like so much of the pain just leaves. The emotional pain that I'm stacking on top of it, right?

Yeah. The pain, the emotional pain, the guilt, whatever it may be. I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together on the Really No Really podcast, our mission is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like why they refuse to make the bathroom door go all the way to the floor. We got the answer.

Will space junk block your cell signal? The astronaut who almost drowned during a spacewalk gives us the answer. We talk with the scientist who figured out if your dog truly loves you and the one bringing back the woolly mammoth. Plus, does Tom Cruise really do his own stunts? His stuntman reveals the answer. And you never know who's going to drop by. Mr. Bryan Cranston is with us tonight.

How are you, too? Hello, my friend. Wayne Knight about Jurassic Park. Wayne Knight, welcome to Really, No Really, sir. Bless you all. Hello, Newman. And you never know when Howie Mandel might just stop by to talk about judging. Really? That's the opening? Really, No Really. Yeah, Newman. And you never know when Howie Mandel might just stop by to talk about judging.

Really? That's the opening? Really? No, really. Yeah, really. No, really. Go to reallynoreally.com. And register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason

Bobblehead. It's called Really? No, Really? And you can find it on the iHeartRadio app, on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. So you are playing handball at a pretty high level now. What else is in your, you got some other goals in the future? You got businesses going well, you're playing handball.

Yeah. Is there anything else out there that you're, your big goal? Yeah, I'm working on a book right now. You know, I've always been attracted to books. I think one, because I could never read as a kid, and it was always a struggle for me to read, and still is sometimes today. But I always was inspired by the idea of books

and that you could learn so much from just reading 100 pages on a book, and you could really expand your mind from these ideas. And you could get them in the hands of everyone who could read that language. And I've written a couple books, but mostly through Kindle. And I've never had a book like in the airport or at Barnes & Noble.

So I just thought, you know what? It'd be cool to be able to get my message out there to more people and to inspire people to experience their own greatness, whatever it looks like for them. It doesn't need to look in a certain way. So I'm working on a book right now that I'm very excited about. It's about greatness and achieving greatness in your own life. And the goals that have that out in bookstores in the

next year, year and a half. My dream has always been to be an Olympian. And I want to inspire people to follow their dreams, no matter how big or small they are, no matter what it looks like. follow their dreams no matter how big or small they are, no matter what it looks like. And for me being a 31 year old still trying to go to the Olympics, a lot of people think I'm a little crazy because I'm too old and I'm starting a sport later in my life. And these guys are 23, 24 in the best shape of their life. They've been playing since they're seven. And I just want to continue to show myself and other people that anything's possible. And even if I don't make the Olympics, I'm going to try as hard as I can. I'm going to give my best and that's all I can do.

One of the four agreements is to always give your best. I believe that's one of the four agreements. And, um, so I'm just going to give my best and go for my dreams because why am I alive if I'm not going to go for my dreams? Yeah. And I think we talked about Rich Roll recently, right as we were coming on the show, and he talks a little bit about, because I like what you said there about

even if I don't make it. Because you talked about becoming an All-American, and that was a big goal, and you talk about sitting at the ceremony feeling empty. So it's not about achieving the goal. No. So it doesn't sound like the Olympian is a place to shoot for, but it sounds like it's the process. It's the journey.

What in that process do you love? Oh, man. I started this journey in 2010. I moved to New York City. I made enough. Originally, I wanted to get off my sister's couch. I wanted to just feel like I could be a grown ass man and pay for my own place. I was able to do that. And I got a $495 a month apartment off first and high in the short North.

And I was like, okay, I've got my, you know, I can at least pay for my own rent and buy my own food in the short North. And I loved that experience. And then I was like, but I really want to learn this sport. And there was no team in Ohio. So I was doing research and I knew that the best team was in New York. I said, that's where I want to learn from the best. So I said, when I make enough money here, I'm going to pack up and move to New York city and start playing the sport. A year and a half later, my business was just taking off. I was like going beyond what I ever thought I would make in my life. And I said, okay, now's the time to leave Columbus. Moved to New York City with a suitcase and found a sublet.

Went right to practice and showed up the first day, the only American out of 25 people from all over the world who play this sport, who live there now, and said, hey, my name is Lewis Howes. My goal is to make the USA national team go to the Olympics for team handball. And everyone laughed at me. And it was funny. Yes, three days ago, four days ago, I was with the same team four years later at the national championships. And one guy, one of the guys who's a good friend of mine, he goes up to me. He goes, I remember that first day you showed up to practice. And you said, hey, my name is Lewis Howes And I want to be, you know, an Olympian.

And we all laughed at you. And now look where you're at. Now you're with us. We just won the national championships and you're on the USA national team. He's like, what a journey it's been on for you to watch you grow over the last four years. And for me, the ups and downs, I've had a number of injuries in the sports. I've had to not be able to play for a couple months. I've learned a lot. It's been extremely frustrating for me because I like to be great at something right away. And it's taken time for me to develop my skills in the sport. So the journey of learning new things, connecting with a community of people who are so passionate about something. I mean, this team is so passionate

about each other and they all came together because of one sport. So learning so much about cultures and language and just like their lives, it's been an incredible journey. You've been doing athletics for a long time. I think you've probably learned a lot through that, you've learned a lot of the discipline and the things that, let's pretend somebody's not going to be playing high school sports because they're 40. Sure. What are ways that people in their day-to-day life can build that discipline that you're talking about?

Because it sounds like, I watch my son, right? He plays lacrosse and he goes every day and he does it. And there's a building of that that I think a lot of people really wrestle with. I think it starts with parents and like creating, setting good habits for your kids. You know, I mean, I'm not a parent, so I don't know, but my, you know, the school system also helps you because it's like, okay, every day there's practice. If you're in a instrument, you're going to practice every day in class. And I think if parents can really support their kids, and at least like being consistent with practice to mastering one specific thing, then once you learn how to master something, you can repeat it with anything. So it's just staying consistent.

So if you're older, something small every day, right? Keep moving in the right direction. The biggest thing that I've seen from a lot of people that I've interviewed are just people in the online marketing world who are successful. The ones who are successful, they're not the smartest. They are so consistent. And I'm just like, man, if they're smart as well, that's great because then they can accelerate that growth. But I look at myself, I would not say that I'm the smartest by any means for a lot of people that I hang out with. In fact, I like to hang out with people who are so intelligent that I just feel dumb, right? But a lot of them, I'm doing better than. And it's because I'm just consistent.

You know, a podcast every week. I was doing a blog post every week. I was creating a new product every couple months. I was just being consistent, doing a webinar every single week, promoting a product. I wasn't trying to do new things. I wasn't trying to act like I knew something I didn't know. I was just consistent with what I knew. And while other people were

way smarter than me, they weren't consistent. And some of my good friends that I was like, these guys are killing it in the online business world. When I first met them, I was like, man, these guys are just doing everything right. Within a year and a half, I just saw myself accelerating past them. And I was like, I don't really know much, but I'm being really consistent with what I do know. Right, right, what you do. And I think there's a lot to be said for what we focus on, think about, create, because there's so much. I mean, there's always another blog to read. There's always another book to read. There's always another program to try.

There's so many of that things, and that not flitting from one to the other so much, about picking something, and that's what I like about, you talked about the idea of a book. I mean, a book is a really cool thing. I grew up with books. But there's also something about 200, 300 pages of an idea versus 10 paragraphs of 10 different ideas, which you get from the internet world. Of course, yeah. Well, I think that's all I've got, Lewis. Thanks very much for having us over to your place. It's really been enjoyable to be here. And thanks for your help in sort of reaching out to us early as we were a new podcast and introducing yourself. And it's been a pleasure to get to know you.

Yeah, I appreciate it. Thanks so much for having me on. All right. Thanks. you can learn more about Lewis Howes and this podcast in our show notes at one you feed.net slash Lewis