The Ramsey Show - App - Create a System of Checks and Balances for Your Mental Health (Hour 1)

Episode Date: April 17, 2020

Dr. John Delony, Debt, Career Tools to get you started:  Debt Calculator: http://bit.ly/2QIoSPV Insurance Coverage Checkup: http://bit.ly/2BrqEuo Complete Guide to Budgeting: http://bit.ly/2QEyonc Interview Guide: http://bit.ly/2BuGnZE Check out other podcasts in the Ramsey Network: http://bit.ly/2JgzaQR 

Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studios, it's the Dave Ramsey Show, where debt is dumb, cash is king, and the paid-off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW as the status symbol of choice. I'm Dave Ramsey, your host. Joining me today on the show, answering your questions as well, Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey personality, and Dr. Deloney works on areas of your relational IQ. So if you have questions about relationships, and John, what is it that we're getting a lot of emails asking you about what types of stuff? We need his mic on, guys. Okay. Okay.

Well, all right. Anyway, so we're getting a lot of questions. We're trying to get his mic working, folks. That's what happens when you're on coronavirus. Skeleton crew, one of the skeleton's bones got crosswired. Say something. No? Okay. bones got cross-wired say something no okay and um anyway so uh dr deloney's here answering

questions the phone number here is 888-825-5225 and uh we'll talk about your life and your money all right are you on now you're not on he's still bad okay uh you might as well just leave if you can't talk. That's so good. Okay. How funny. Oh, well, anyway, you can ask him questions about relational IQ. There's a lot of questions coming in about in-laws and about kids and grown kids and parents and grown parents and parents of grown people and marriage and fear and anxiety around the economy and fear and anxiety around all kinds of different things. And so, you know, certainly the coronavirus episode that we're square in the middle of. So you got questions of anything around anything else, then, you know, we can do that.

Did you hear that, John? If you jump around on this other side over here,, we can do that. Did you hear that, John? If you jump around on this other side over here, maybe we can get that mic working. All right. Again, open phones at 888-825-5225. While we get him wired in, let's talk to Samantha in Utah. Hi, Samantha. Welcome to The Dave Ramsey Show. Hi, Dave.

How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up? I have been working to aggressively pay down my student loans and actually just paid off my first one yesterday. Good. How much was that? So I have worked.

It was $10,000 total. Good for you. Thank you. Well done. Unfortunately, I still have about $,000 left. I have looked into refinancing in the past through Splash and have been getting emails the last couple of weeks about how low the rates are right now, which is very, very appealing compared to my normal 7% interest rate, which I don't currently pay since the interest has been frozen. So my question is how to anticipate and weigh the benefit of refinancing sooner than the interest is unfrozen in anticipation of those rates going back up. Well, you're getting a quote from Splash at what rate?

The last email I got, which was just a general rate, was 2%. Okay, and your current rate is 7%. It's an average of 7%. Okay, and so you're going to save about 5% on that. In the meantime, between now and september you will have zero interest correct correct okay and so let's see we've got um may june july august you have four months of free interest at seven what i would ask the folks at splash is can you do the refinance starting september one lock it in now lock it in now get it all set up and make it effective september one

and in the meantime uh you pay zero or if you refinance with them now is it zero until september and two percent after that i don't know how splashes do handling this that's a really cool question but it's worth it to find out yeah because they're going to be making a a government insured student loan with the refinance it's not going to be a outside of that and my guess is it might be interest free even if you refinance until september and then the new rate would just start that that would make sense because I would guess that even new loans that are from a refinance are there, are zero. But if they're not, then see if you can start at September 1. If not, I'm certainly going to ride the free until September

1 and then sometime in August pull the trigger on the refinance but uh but i guess the easiest would be if you refinance now and the and you don't pay interest until september splash may have that set up as a part of this part of the care program i don't know i don't know how that's working there's so many nuances to this stuff but be sure and check with them and uh ask them that and see what you can get from there open phones at 888-825-5225. You jump in. We'll talk about your life and your money. Patrick is with us in Ohio.

Hi, Patrick. Welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show. Hey, Dave. Nice to talk to you, long-time listener. They told me to be brief. They were looking at an option to get me into an annuity at, say, about, well, I'm 58, and so I'd have to go about six years to get a constant $3,000 a month coming in. No. Yes, but I probably would have to sell off about 500 grand worth of my stocks.

Yeah, no thanks. Or maybe more. No thanks. Okay. Now, are you in stocks or are you in mutual funds? No, I got stocks, mutual funds, bonds, CDs. Okay. And what's your total pile, what's all of that piled up worth?

Well, as before the corona, maybe I was about 2.8. Okay. Now, so what is it you're looking for the annuity to do for you? Well, I didn't know, you know, here's the thing. At my age, hell, I might not make it to 65. You know, I mean, anything can happen. Sure. How old are you but

uh 58 okay are you ill but i uh not yet not yet all right so so what are you wanting the annuity to do? Well, I didn't know, you know, in times of doubt, like now, so let's just say you go through a period of like, okay, let's say you had 2.8 and maybe we go through some bad times where you're down to 2 or, you know, you lose 400 or 500 grand. So at the time, I'm not working right now. I'm not real big on going back. I don't like being under the thumb right now.

Too much micromanagement. So I'm kind of enjoying being off. Good. But I don't want to try doing some things like that. Listen, let me just stop you. Here's the thing. What you're trying to do is you're trying to get protection for your principal, and what you're going to give up and in return for that is not worth it so i would just stay

in good mutual funds that have long track records now if you've got some super volatile stocks or something you do need to move out of those but you needed to anyway um and this this crazy time has just revealed the risk that you were taking. So, but basically, you know, you're 58 when you're 65. That's seven years from now. Where will this 2.8 that became 2.4 be? It'll be at 3.8. And so it'll continue to grow.

The market will recover. And I would just continue to do what you're doing, but maybe dial back what you're invested in to something a little more conservative like mutual funds. Hey thanks Patrick. Folks I love telling you about well-made well-thought-out products. Today I'm talking about Grip6 belts. I don't know about you, but I'm not a fan of traditional belts. They never fit right, and they're uncomfortable. Grip6 belts are unique. Owner BJ designed a truly modern minimalist belt made of high quality materials with no holes, no flap, and no bulk. And the buckles come in really cool designs and are interchangeable. I personally own these belts in different styles. And talk about affordability, Grip 6 belts come with a lifetime guarantee.

And that means if you no longer like or fit the style of your belt, you can replace them for free. Plus, I like the way these guys do business. Grip 6 is determined to help build and modernize american manufacturing to learn more and get this month's dave ramsey special visit grip6.com that's grip6.com Well, I think we got Dr. D's wiring working again here. Well, not his wiring. I was going to say. The wiring of the studio where he sits anyway and something like that. His wiring will always be in question.

I've been working on my wiring for years. That's how you became a doctor of psychiatry. I tell you what. It's always messed up. There's always of psychiatry. I tell you what. It's always messed up. There's always something. Okay, so we were trying to say before the break what it is you've been getting emails about, the types of subjects. People are asking Dr. Deloney what? They're asking about relationships and marriages and dating and mental health challenges and fear and stress.

Everything outside of, you know, the tangible things they can see every day. I'm getting some great emails from all over the country. Cool. Okay. If you want to ask questions of him around that kinds of subject, open phones at 888-825-5225. That's 888-825-5225. Ariel is on the line.

Ariel's in Georgia. Hi, Ariel. Welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show. Hey, guys. Thank you so much for taking my call. Hey, Ariel. How are you? I'm good.

Thank you. Hey, so I've been struggling with getting my meds right for my bipolar II disorder for about a year now. I'm working with a psychiatrist. I have addictive behaviors and one of those that I can't seem to quite curb is my spending. I'm not putting us into more debt, but I'm definitely not helping us. We're in baby step number two. We're currently hoarding money during the coronavirus. So we're trying to save as much as we can. But my question is how long or how do I help curb that need to spend so I'm not hindering us from

getting out of debt as fast as we possibly can? So what does this compulsion feel like? What does it look like for you? I get real anxious. I feel like I need to buy something to fill a void to avoid sort of something along those lines. So what I would, bipolar obviously has got a lot of history to it. It's probably one of the most diagnosed mental health issues in the country, and it's probably one of the most over-diagnosed mental health issues too.

And bipolar too is notoriously challenging to regulate and to diagnose. How long have you been working with a psychiatrist? Around a year now. Okay. So what I would do out, short of saying something that I would tell you that you may feel is unhelpful, which would be just stop, I would put some prohibitory behaviors in your world, right? I would put some blocks that are going to make it challenging for you. And that may mean having some rules about not getting on the computer, not purchasing things, giving over your debit card to your husband, putting people in your life that are going to prohibit you from that behavior,

and more importantly, finding some alternative behaviors that are going to fill that anxiety gap for you. I love that you've already framed it that way, that you feel it rise up in you as this compulsion that you have to go do a thing. That means that you can come up with other behaviors that are more positive for you. And it may be like taking a walk. It may be going to exercise. It may be doing something nice for somebody, but it's finding a behavior that's going to give you that same dopamine hit that buying something is

but isn't going to hurt your family in this time of trying to save your money, right? Ariel, we've worked. I don't know anything near as much about this as John does, but I've ended up, as you might guess, over the 30 years of doing the financial crisis, I've ended up working with a bunch of bipolar folks over the years. And the good news that I've seen is the ones, and I can hear the way you're framing your sentences and the way your thought patterns are about this, that you're really making dramatic progress. And, you know, you're getting, you know, you're happening to the situation more than it's happening to you now.

And that's the beginning of healing. So congratulations. That's a hard fight you're in. And the way I would treat it if I were in your shoes or your husband's shoes is just say, you know, this person, you, when you're in that manic state or whatever state it is that's causing you to spin saying that um uh you you are permanently disabled or something like that it's okay to turn all the money over to him for a little while until you get the other side of this i'll take give you another example i i've worked with couples where one of them is addicted to cocaine and there's 100 of cocaine addicts eventually are bankrupt unless they get healed of the cocaine right and so i just take the money away from that person while they're healing and any controls and treat them uh and don't take this wrong but i for to protect you from you uh and and your family for a short period of time i just treat them like they're a four-year-old.

And I just say, I'm going to take care of you, and that's your husband who's going to do that, and you're going to turn the stuff over to him. You're doing that right now while you're rational, and then progressively and incrementally as you get control over these things, and I think you're close to that just listening to you. I'm not a doc okay so that's not worth anything when i said that but but um incrementally as you sense healing and

sense control over these behaviors then you return he starts returning elements a debit card a discussion about the budget something that doesn't bring anxiety to you and you participate gradually and incrementally more and more as you heal and get your maybe some pharmacology that you get under control and you get balanced, and it takes a little while to do that. But, you know, in other words, it's not forever. It's until. It's like you've been in a car wreck, and until you heal, you can't do this.

That kind of a thing. That's the way I look at it from a practical standpoint i don't know how that frames up with doc stuff though what do you think john i i think the fact that you're asking this question tells me yeah i think dave you're right you're down the road do you take your meds when you're up and down or do you have seasons where you every day oh good for you i'm high-fiving you from you're wearing georgia high five to you here from from nashville that's usually one of the bigger challenges. Folks quit taking their medication. So one thing that's going to be a gift to you is what I'll call a series of

little wins. And so writing a letter to your husband or having a small note that says, I'm turning this over for this season is going to, that you not something he's taken from you, but something that you are giving to him is going to be a moment where you're going to have a little win here that you're taking control of this. And then the next thing is going to be an moment where you're going to have a little win here, that you're taking control of this. And then the next thing is going to be, and in place of this behavior, I'm going to do the following. I'm going to go for a walk when I feel that anxiety.

I know that feeling you're talking about, man. It just started wadding up in your chest there. Good for you, Ariel. Proud of you. You're doing good stuff. Oh, that's good. I predict a year from now you've got a completely different life. I think you're on that stuff and oh that's good i predict a year from now you've got a completely different life i think you're on that track i really do and so anything we're doing is just you know again it's like somebody's been in a car wreck we give them time to heal in a year from now

you know i got a friend of mine that was in a horrible car wreck and um she's at christmas and she's just now you know down here close May, is able to move and is ambulatory and all that. It takes a while to heal from an injury. And mental health is no different than physical health in that regard. Right. And I would even say you don't have to have bipolar or a bad car wreck to say in this season I need to turn my computer off. Right. Because I get extra stressed.

And so then I watch too much Netflix and then I stay up too late and then I don't sleep well and then I start looping, right? So I think all of us, whether you have a bipolar diagnosis or a car wreck or just a regular person walking on the street, all of us need to know, I need to get out of this behavior right now. I need to have an accountability partner. I need to turn this particular, I need to have someone ask me, do you really want that other bowl of ice cream, i need to have that those those checks and balances good for you ariel that's very good you know and it just because um i mean i looked up and you know and i'm working i'm at work every day and i still looked up and i have gained five pounds oh man and i already was overweight it's just not cool dave and i told sharon and because my wife's a health nut

and so she's got like zero body fat which is simultaneously wonderful since she's my wife but also shaming right and so so you know so about a week and a half ago i've done two miles every morning i just had to go do something good for you you know it's well just waddle my little fat butt down the street but yeah but i but i'm doing it you know i was walking up the stairs yesterday in my house i went downstairs did all my morning routine hug the kids hug you know. I was walking up the stairs yesterday in my house. I went downstairs, did all my morning routine, hugged the kids, hugged my wife. And I was walking up the stairs mindlessly. This is like 830 in the morning with a bag of chips and some Easter candy. And I do this for a living.

Peeps! Peeps! Oh, my gosh. Peeps are CVS's cocaine, man. But I thought, what are you doing and so yeah i asked my wife i need you to step in and help me in this while i transition to sharon doesn't sharon doesn't hesitate to help in that regard but uh uh because she just loves health food anyway but oh my gosh so yeah i mean but you you know what's it where it is instantly within two days of starting to do a two-mile walk every morning feel better feel. Feel better. Your brain clears up, and you're not this screen, because there's nothing on this screen that's helping me.

Nope. There's little wins. Little wins. 200 emails that are helping, probably, running the business here. But looking at this, jeez, this world on the screen all day long. Just going for a walk, right? Go for a walk. Beautiful.

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uh we this is now the third week we have offered this for the first time in 30 years um warning we're not going to offer it a lot longer we're doing this as a gift to you guys to get you going in Financial Peace University while you're stuck at home and while some of you have lost your jobs. We're trying to help you. So there's nine Financial Peace University lessons. There is Every Dollar, the world's best budgeting app. There are other classes in the Financial Peace membership. There is community in the Financial Peace membership, and there is a new app called the Baby Steps Tracker, where you can track your progress through your financial plan. Are you winning? Are you getting traction? And again, you can now get a free trial at this moment still for 14 days to Financial Peace University,

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which you don't have to quit at 14 days. Just the free part stops after 14 days. So, again, DaveRamsey.com slash hope. And you can get all kinds of goodies there. And this whole digital engagement thing is a new thing for me. Rita is in Colorado. Rita, your question for Dr. D and I. Me. Hi and I. Me.

Hi. Hi. My question is, is it sane to stay in a marriage that is not fulfilling? It's not a good marriage, but it's not a bad situation for me? You're going to have to be a little more clear. What is fulfilling? What is good? What is bad?

Okay. We have no relationship. We sit together to eat and we'll sit in the living room with him watching the boob tube but um we have not much in common and i have basically i have my own life and he has his ah so you're just living in the same house so your roommates how long you've been married yes uh 14 years. So when's the last time you sat down and looked him in the eye and said, here's how I'm feeling?

Last weekend. How'd that conversation go? Play it back for me. This is, I had written him a note because I'm real good with expressing myself in writing. Good for you. And, and so he never responded at all. So I finally asked him about it and he said, this is how I am and this is how I'll always be. So you asked me, your original question is, are you sane to stay? What I would, and so I don't want to frame this and Dave, you feel free to pop in. I don't want to frame this as a, are you crazy or are you not crazy? Um, I'm a high marriage guy. I put a lot

of value in it and I've got a wife that's been awfully forgiving over the years as I've kind of muddled my way through trying to grow up and learn what a husband's supposed to look like so I'm a high marriage guy I'm never gonna it's gonna be a very rare situation that I tell somebody you know you should you should bail on something the other side of it is you've got to ask yourself the question the what I call the or what question like what's the line you're going to draw on the sand and what's going to be the other side of that? And so I know a lot of grandiose folks, they generally end up being men. I found myself being one of them, um, are really reluctant to change. Dave and I were talking about how everyone's reluctant to change off the air just now. Um, and you're going to have to put a line

in the sand and say, here's what I need this to be. And here's what this is going to look like. But this vague picture of it's pretty good, except we don't have a relationship, and I'm here all by myself and I have my own life. You're going to have to be a lot more articulate, so I'm going to recommend you get a professional counselor or a pastor that you trust and someone you can sit down and help you walk through it. I'd almost guarantee you that a response from a husband sitting in front of a TV, this is the way I am, this is how this is going to be, that's not a true statement. That's a statement of a hurting guy. That's a statement of a lost

guy who has no relational skills, doesn't know what he's doing, and doesn't have the ability, much less the courage, to come out and say, I need to change and I need some help. Yeah. And, you know, when we went broke, we've been married seven years and uh we you know we should have killed each other in the seventh year during the time we went bankrupt we had a little babies and we were bankrupt and we didn't have enough energy to deal with the relational wounds that came from that and so they they popped up three years later uh as my friend henry cloud says he said when you bury feelings like that they have a high rate of resurrection and um so they came up and we end up in marriage counseling about to kill each other once we were healed enough to not

you know we we were in survival mode so we didn't deal with our feelings and uh and so we you know at the 10-year point d Dave and Sharon just about called it. And a marriage counselor that's a good friend of ours to this day saved our marriage and our lives probably. But we just did not have the tools on our own to deal with it. And, you know, she gave Sharon things to do and to say and to think and me things to do and to say and to think and books to read. And, you know, we spent the next three years on a journey learning how to be married and learning how to connect and how to do that. And so I'm with John, I think, plugging in with a good pastor, a whole series of marriage classes and books and investing in that, even if you're doing it by yourself.

It'll give you phrases to say, words to bring, and it'll give you a lot more clarity. Because my experience just as an old guy, and I'm not a doc, I keep saying this over and over, but my experience is that if you don't lay out a series of things like John's talking about and say, at this point, after I've tried these six things, I am done. If you don't give some clarity of what your expectations are and if we're not moving towards those expectations, I am done. What will happen is just this vague buildup. And what I've observed with our friends and stuff over the years is you will finally just lose it the switch will flip and there'll be no talking you into it no matter what he does

no matter how sorry he is no matter how much he wants to participate because you know and it'll be quite a surprise to him because it just it built to a boil and then the thing just explodes and there's no no reeling you back in then. You'll be gone. You'll be off the planet. And if you're like a lot of folks that I've observed, I don't know what that's called, but I've just – the switch flips. Yeah, you just get done. You get to the point that there's no return here.

And I think this is a good moment. I want to call out the husbands across the country, the wives across the country that are paralyzed by this, who now have retreated to Tiger King for a second round, right, who are just unplugging from these relationships as a survival mechanism. I get it and I understand, but your partner deserves more, your kids deserve more, and your family unit deserves more. And you have to lean into however uncomfortable this is right now and however uncomfortable it's going to continue to be in the weeks to come. But you've got a responsibility. Yeah, the adults in the house do.

You've got to be the adult here. The husbands and the wives, both. And if your wife comes to you with the courage to say, hey, I need more from you, don't say this is just how I am. Don't do that. That's immature. That's what a child does. Yeah.

Really? Everybody in my family is that way. That's because your family is stupid. Today you stop. Today you stop. Today you stop. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. show. Business leaders hiring right now may be the furthest thing from your mind, but the fact of the matter is we will recover.

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Terms and conditions apply. Sasha's with us in Ohio. Hey, Sasha, welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show. Hi, Dave. It is great to talk to you guys today. You too. What's up? Okay. So since we're going through this new type of change now and with the coronavirus and everything, I'm still working, working from home,

but I was thinking of going ahead and starting a side business. But I honestly feel a little fearful about doing it. So I wanted to talk to you guys about how to overcome that fear. So what kind of fear are you feeling, Sasha? Failure. Okay. What I figured out is that no one is ever successful, that all the people I've met that are successful are colossal failures. They just don't engage in things that create fatal failure.

They have lots of little minor failures. When you're driving down the road to stay in your lane you correct continuously and so that you know the the uh the the tendency to drift towards another lane is a failure it's just not a fatal failure and you correct two percent rather than uh rather than a 90 degree turn and so we all have failures the trick is to stage your business and to grow your business and to launch your business in such a way that at any time the failure is not that you're the thing the new thing you're attempting is not fatal i'll give you an example inside of our company we have a standard thing that we say all the time around here internally in our leadership team we are not going to launch something that if it completely crashes

crashes the whole place in poker in a poker parlance that means i'm putting all my chips on one hand i'm not going to slide all the chips only james bond does that right i'm not sliding all my chips to the middle of the table on one hand where if this thing doesn't work we're screwed the whole place is coming down 30 years of work's coming down around my ears based on one stupid butt decision and so our one thing that we really believed in but turned out to be a stupid butt decision and so what we find is is that we're going to fail and we want to fail continuously a friend of mine wrote a book john maxwell called failing forward you want to just you know look confused and stumble forward right so you want to do that and it helps me if my fears then are

uh if i was afraid i was going to lose everything i built for 30 years I'd be terrified and anybody that wasn't wouldn't be wise so and if you so if you're starting a new business and it's going to you know you're going to borrow a hundred thousand dollars and we'll take a second mortgage against your house with the SBA to start this new business and if ice cream parlor doesn't work you're going to lose your home well that would terrify, and I wouldn't suggest that. And so I've got to find another way to open the business without as much risk, meaning I keep my fears small because I'm keeping my failures small. John, from an emotional standpoint, how do you deal with it? I think I go back to that statement they used to talk about,

or the old wives' tale about the astronauts and their heart rate never getting up because they planned, planned, planned. They had a roadmap and they had a plan. And so when the launch actually happened, they were ready for everything that was coming. And obviously you can't know every up and down in a business world. But Sasha, what business do you want to get into? What do you want to do? I am a recruiter.

So I would be recruiting. I'd be doing it independently versus for another organization. I think my biggest fear is because I'm a single mom, you know, everything depends on just my income. So if something goes wrong, you know, that's my biggest fear. So have you signed some pretty clear non-compete clauses with that? I've got a recruiter in my family who's just world-class at it, but I know the non-competes are pretty hefty. And I'm asking that to ask you, could you create a side business and grow something while you're keeping your day job? I believe so, yes. Okay. That'd be my recommendation is to, one, I think, let's get you a copy of Christy Wright's Business Boutique Plan book. My wife has followed that. It's remarkable.

It's just a step-by-step guide for how someone in your situation can start a business that she can grow. And then obviously don't quit your job until you've got something that you feel confident that you're ready to rock and roll that can withhold your family. Yeah, if you can launch the business as a side hustle, the way John's talking about, and let's say you get 50% to 70% of your income working on the side, then you can drop the other one without as much fear. That's right. And we just say, the way we say that is don't try to jump into the boat until the boat's close enough to the dock.

Get your income up enough, that's the boat getting close to the dock, with a side hustle that you can make the leap to full time without so much risk. Annie is in Utah. Hi, Annie. Welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show. Hi, Dave. Hi, Dr. D. So I am a military wife.

My husband is separating in August of this year, and I was just wondering how much money should we save until we can start baby step two again? Okay. Well, tell him thanks for his service, and you too. How long has he been in? We both are actually in for about six years. I got out last September. Okay.

So what's he going to do, and when will he know if he's doing it? So it's kind of up in the – he knows for sure he's going to use his GI Bill going to school, but it's kind of hard right now with everything going on. We don't know, you know, how long it will take for his GI Bill to kick in or if they'll require him to do a certain amount of semesters before they pay up for that. No, they don't. They just start paying you when you do it. That's how the GI Bill works.

It's got a stipend with it as well. So that's all great. So he's going to school. He's not going to work. No, he's going to separate, and then he wants to start probably in the fall semester. To do what? He wants to go for IT, for computers.

A four-year? A four-year, yes. Okay, so he's getting a four-year in information systems. It's going to take him four years. He's not going to work for four years. Yeah. Okay, what do you make? Right now I'm a stay-at-home mom,

but I'm the one that's going to go back to work because we just had a newborn. Okay. Well, you know, and maybe he's working while he's in school too. Okay. Yeah, that's probably going to be true. So I think when you guys get your incomes stabilized after this transition is when you would start your baby steps,

and in the meantime you pile up cash to make sure you can do the transition. But I think he's enrolled in school, got his GI money flowing, he's got his good side hustle going, and you've got your new job, and that's your life for the next four years. Once that's stabilized, then we plug that into your budget system. All right. Does that make sense? Yeah. I just wondered if there was like

you know a magic number we could save up and then start step two again well because you know it doesn't matter if you're going to drain the magic number if you saved a hundred thousand but you're burning ten thousand a month you're done in ten months i'm not saying that would happen but i was being extreme but you can build up at what feels like a big pile of cash but it'll burn up if you don't have a plan to support your household and start hitting some of your goals during this four years i don't want you to put your life on hold for four years i do want him to go to school and get an information systems degree though that's wonderful and i'm glad i'm glad that we the taxpayers are paying for this one of the few things that we the taxpayers are paying for. It's one of the few things that we get to pay for that we're glad we pay for to give him a fresh start after the military.

But, yeah, and I think that's a good thing to remember for all of you out there that fits with this. And, John, this is what we've been saying since the shutdown became nationwide and became everybody's reality is if your income is unstable, and by the way, this is what we've said for 30 years. This isn't new to the coronavirus. If your income is unstable, meaning that you're about to be laid off or you just got laid off or you're furloughed or in their case it has nothing to do with corona but they're going through a transition,

yeah, you just push pause on your baby steps and pile up cash to cover the transition. But then as soon as you get stabilized again, meaning you get your job back, you're on the other side of the furlough, you start a new career. In their case, they're the other side of that transition. You get stabilized in their four-year plan. Then you push play again. And that just gives you a sense of peace to have that transition cash. Absolutely. Dr. John Deloney with me this day on the Dave Ramsey Show.

We appreciate you guys joining us. Open phones at 888-825-5225. Anytime you've got questions for John, you can email him directly, askjohn at ramsesolutions.com. Askjohn at ramsSolutions.com. Ask John at RamseySolutions.com. That puts this hour of the Dave Ramsey Show in the books. In the middle of these uncertain times, Ramsey Solutions wants to give you some hope. For the very first time ever, we're giving you Financial Peace University free for 14 days.

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