The Ramsey Show - App - DAVE RANT: When You're Broke, You're Not Entitled to ANYTHING! (Hour 2)

Episode Date: October 14, 2020

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Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studios, it's the Dave Ramsey Show, where debt is dumb, cash is king, and the paid-off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW as the status symbol of choice. I'm Dave Ramsey, your host. Thank you for joining us. My co-host today here on the air is Rachel Cruz, Ramsey personality, number one best-selling author a couple times over, and my daughter. We're here to answer your questions, help you along the path on your money journey. Open phones at 888-825-5225. That's 888-825-5225.

James is with us in San Diego. Hi, James. Welcome to The Dave Ramsey Show. Hey, guys. How are you guys doing? Great. How can we help? Thank you for taking the call.

Yeah, I'm relatively new to the family. I started binge-watching all of your shows since COVID happened. So I'm trying to identify kind of where I would stand in everything. We have a baby coming in March. Yay! Yeah. Welcome to the family, by the way. Thank you. Thank you. We got married January last year, and recently, in the middle of COVID,

moved from New York City to California, started a new job as a children's pastor here. And pretty much, I'm just trying to identify what priorities should be. Obviously, I know we need to save for the baby. We're on baby step one currently. Actually, baby step two, because we have 1,000. But we do have a loan, a car loan. We bought a second-hand car when we got here. So it wasn't new, but it was definitely,

I still took out an $18,000 loan for it. And I guess I'm just trying to figure out, okay, what priority should I be focusing on between now and, I guess, next year, really? Yeah, and the baby. Well, our rule of thumb, thumb James is the fact that you guys are expecting a baby things shift a little bit here so we usually always say you're gazelle intense you're paying off your debt that's where you guys would be but because the baby is coming

we're actually going to pause baby step two and just pile up money because you guys just have that thousand dollar in savings and so just anything you would be paying at the at the debt you want to stay current on all of your debt, but not paying extra on it and pile up some savings. And then once baby comes and mom and baby are safe and good to go, then you can apply all that money besides the $1,000 onto your debt. So how much debt do you guys have? You have the $18,000 car loan? Just the $18,000. Oh, that's it? Okay.

Yeah, we do have a little bit on some cards from this month but it will be paid off um tomorrow when i get paid okay so we're going to tell you then um tonight tonight we're going to teach you to have a thing called plastic surgery where you chop up the cards and get on a debit card system where you quit you quit spending money you don't have and jump on to uh every dollar or jump into ramsey plus and start the free trial and get the every dollar budgeting app and it'll help you put together your budget where you can make your money behave monthly that way and so what is your household income right now uh we're on 70 000 okay so if you were to just guess because you haven't done your budget i can tell which is fine you're just just joining the family but uh if you were to guess how much money a month

can you pile up if you don't pay any extra on debt and your only goal was to build your savings um well actually i've done a brief budget i think think currently we have about $1,000 excess a month from paying off all of the bills, the necessary bills, and then the loan. And when's the baby come, James? March. In March. March, okay. And I had one more thing. My mom, I also came into an inheritance this year.

My late uncle passed, and I was in his will. So we got $19,000 from that. I obviously tied the tides off of that. But my mom's been giving me money two times, like $5,000 every couple months to go towards that down payment. But she said specifically she wanted that for that. Do I just leave that there until we're at a place to use that? Yeah, that's fine. Just set it over we're at a place to use that or that's fine just set it over a separate savings account and just pretend like it's not there because she's you know she stipulated how that gifts to be used so we have to honor that um not what i normally would

do don't care for that idea but it's okay you're there now so so you have 19 000 and i'm going to tell you that when you really start leaning in on your budget and you and your wife are working on it really, really tight, and you get more intense and more focused, you're going to do more than $1,000. Let's pretend, for example purposes, for five months between now and March you did $2,000. Well, that would be $10,000. You already have $19,000, so that would put you at $29,000 in savings when baby comes. I actually have 26 currently in the housing one. No, I'm talking about the housing.

The housing's separate. Yeah. Wait, is the inheritance for the house? The inheritance I put into the housing one. No. No, your inheritance is getting ready to pay your car off after baby comes. Okay. Okay. At the moment, it's all in the same one.

I would have only your mom's money in the house fund. Gotcha. Because that's the money that she has dictated what the gift is for. The inheritance money is yours to do with as you please. And so what we're going to have is we're going to have your inheritance money, house money separate from mom, your inheritance money plus whatever you can save between now and baby. So you're going to have $25,000 to $30,000 in that account when the baby comes.

That's going to feel pretty good, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. A lot of comfort with a new baby, a new job in a new land called California, and a new marriage and all this stuff. So there's a lot of money here to give you comfort for a short period of time anyway. Now, baby comes home, mama comes home, we write a check and pay off the car. That's going to leave you somewhere in the neighborhood of $10,000. Yes, sir. For your baby step three emergency fund. And so then you can start to save in addition to that towards your home if you want to. We call that baby step 3b and that's how

we would execute the baby step plans in your situation so but rachel's exactly right excuse me what we've got to do is you push pause on your baby steps you do not do the baby steps when the baby's on the way or when you've got some other thing that's on the horizon that's a big deal like you know you're going to lose your on the horizon that's a big deal like you know you're going to lose your job in two months they've announced it yeah you know you push pause and you pile up cash to get ready for that then when you get the other side of the situation like baby comes or you get the new job or whatever then you clean out the account all the way down to a thousand in your case you're not going to need to clean it all the way out because you're going

to have more and you're probably going to have almost have your baby step three completed. It's very cool. You're in a really good position. Yeah. And I think some people who are new to the program, because I know, like he said, I feel like during quarantine, a lot of people just binge watch YouTube and stuff. But even though the money is in the account, even just from the inheritance, and he has enough money to pay off the car today, you still press pause because of the big life event. So even though it's there, still press pause. It'll be fine. Stay current on the car. And then again, in a few months, in March, they can pay it off. Yeah. And just because

the last thing you want to do is have $8,000 in your account and baby comes and you have a $9,000 issue. Yeah. And you got to worry about money and baby. That's right. That's right. Or money and mommy. So we just don't need that. This is supposed to be a blessed time, an exciting time, a fun time. And when you take money stress off the table, it allows that to occur that way.

The joy can flow. Not worrying about anything else. So fun. First babies are so fun. Oh, this is the Dave Ramsey show. Families all over the country are discovering a faith-based and budget-friendly way of meeting health care costs, whether they're anticipated or completely unexpected. For example, take the Olcheski family from LaGrange, Texas. Jeff and Carice had just celebrated the birth of a new baby boy. Shortly after, they had another expensive medical issue come up. They could have faced a huge financial

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They have a 100% satisfaction guarantee. It means even if you mismeasure, you pick the wrong color, they'll remake your blinds for free. You get free samples, free shipping, and with the new promos they run every month, you'll save even more. Use the promo code RAMSY to get the best deal. Today's question comes from Jordan in California. She visits DaveRamsey.com to ask, I am wondering what the better option is when on baby step two or three, buying something cheap and that's going to need to be replaced quickly

or making room in the budget for a higher quality item that will last a long time. In baby step two? Two or three. You wouldn't be buying anything. That's what I was thinking. But if you're like... None of the above. If your car, though, has to be replaced, like it dies on you and you're like, okay, I need

a new car. You go cheap, cheap, cheap, making sure it's reliable and you're not having to go to the mechanic every other day. Yeah, that's like $3,000 cheap. Yeah, you are. sure it's reliable and you're not having to go to the mechanic every other day. Yeah, that's like $3,000 cheap. Yeah, you are. Not like $30,000 cheap. Right. Well, some people get confused about what that means.

That's fair. All relative. All relative. Yeah. You get a freaking hoopty when you're in baby step two or three, and you don't upgrade anything. You only do emergency spending. It's the only spending you do because it's an emergency to get out of debt. You are in gazelle intensity mode. That's exactly right. So

here's the thing. You can wander into debt. Most people do. It's normal in our culture to be in debt. Everyone teaches you to be in debt. All the people that want you to buy crap from them tell you to be in debt. Everybody is talking about being in debt, and everybody's broke. The only people that talk about getting out of debt are those people that are wealthy, and that's how they got wealthy. I mean, you talk to wealthy people, this is what you're going to find out. And so what is required here, you are going against the entire set of cultural influences, not only in your life, but in all of our lives. And so the idea to get out of debt and stay out of debt requires tremendous emotional energy you gotta and you can't just kind of go well i can't think and do i buy something cheaper no you have to get

fired up and wired up i mean because you're going against everybody everybody's gonna think you're crazy except wealthy people I mean you and so you have to exert this extreme amount of energy to break through all these barriers in your psyche that's right well you said earlier you you can wander your way in like most people do but you can't wander your way out like there has to be a level of intensity there has to be a level of like you're going against the grain and it's going to feel uncomfortable. Change is hard. It's not always fun. But as you start making that progress and you start saying things like, oh yeah, yeah, I got, no, we're not buying anything. Like nothing, all our extra money is going towards this debt. Not only do you get out of debt faster and you advance in so many ways, financially and emotionally, spiritually, all of that, because you just have no payments.

You don't owe anyone anything. But on top of that, something changes within you. That level of sacrifice really does. It's this iron sharpening iron and the process of it all refines you. And I think what ends up happening is you start to realize, okay, all this stuff that probably put me in debt in the first place. Wow. It really doesn't matter.

Like when I sacrifice stuff and I start selling things off, like suddenly even your value system starts to change in our culture, in your life that goes against the culture. The point of gazelle intensity is gazelle's running from a cheetah for his life. You have to run for your life you cannot just act like this is an academic intellectual exercise you're carving new grooves in your brain and the only way you do that is with when people look at you and go you're so extreme then you're right on track because those are stupid broke people that are saying that i think i don't think i could do what you're doing that's your dad gum right you couldn't because i'm a winner and you're a loser

i mean these things have to go through your head if broke people are making fun of your financial plan you're right on track but if they're not making fun of you you plan, you're right on track. But if they're not making fun of you, you're not doing it right because you need to go to scorched earth because you're setting your whole psyche, your relationships to stuff, your relationship with your spouse. Everything's in a whole new zone. And you're basically taking an emotional bulldozer and digging a new ditch in your life. And this is not like, I just think i'll have a little ditch here no you're digging a hole you're getting out of this mess you're changing and you you cannot half but do this stuff and so you can't go on vacation

when you're in baby step two that's freaking lame-o you can't be going out to eat when you're in baby step two. That's freaking lame-o. You can't be going out to eat when you're in baby step two. That's freaking lame-o. You're getting out of debt like your hair's on fire, like your children's lives depend on it because they do. You're changing your family tree and you don't do that without this thing happening inside of you. And that's when people change their lives when they finally say i've had it the level of intensity is so so crucial in the process yeah and it's going to lead you to deeper sacrifice and that frees up the math goofing around with the intensity will lead you to watered down wussifiedussified levels of sacrifice, which screws up the math, and you stay in debt longer,

and you have a higher probability of never making it out because you run out of steam before you get to there. And possibly going back in. Yeah, and you just give up, and you go, I'm going to go be normal. Screw it. Screw it. I'm going to be broke like everybody else and look like I'm not. And I'm just going to go buy crap I can't afford, money that I don't have to impress people I don't even like.

And I'm going to go back to those old ways. And you just got to, you know, you have to reach a point that you go, no, no. And so picking on Jordan a little bit, the point is when you're in that mindset, you don't even ask the question that you asked Jordan. It wouldn't have even come up unless it's an emergency expenditure, like a car went kaput like you talked about rachel yep yep you don't ask a question of what level of vacation can i go on you don't deserve a vacation you're freaking broken in debt don't tell me you're entitled

to squat you're not when i was broke and rachel's a baby and the electricity gets cut off, I can't come in and go, you know, I work so hard, I think we need to go on a vacation. No, we need to turn the dadgum lights back on. We have a baby in the house. You can't, you know, your whining is unbelievable. And it happens inside of all of our heads. It happened with us. I mean, you know, we've been fighting against bankruptcy for two and a half years.

We hit bottom. We're bankrupt. We got zero. It would have been real easy to justify, well, we've been through this horrible time, and we just really need to rest. And, you know, you can't do that. What an option. Because we've freaking been on the street.

And I wonder what the level of, even from 30 years ago to now 35 years ago to now the amount of comfort we have in our lives today from the accessibility of just information getting what we want when we want it you know amazon anything to be at your doorstep even that day like there's a level of comfort we live oh we're spoiled rotten yep you can pick up a little square thing and touch buttons and stuff shows up on your doorstep. To be uncomfortable right now in life is very scary and uncomfortable. But you have to be uncomfortable in this process. If you continue to just be comfortable, you're not going to get the progress.

But that comfortability sweeps all of us. It's in all of us. We're spoiled rotten. We really are. I mean, when you can pick up that little square thing and touch three buttons, this stuff shows up on your front porch. And you can touch three buttons and get the answer to any one button and get the answer to almost any question.

You can't even have a good argument anymore, you know, because the answer is right there, you know. And so, you know, when's early voting in? Well, it's right there. You just Google it. I mean, we were laughing the other day, Anthony and I, like all the questions people ask us here on the radio, they don't need to ask there. You just Google it. We were laughing the other day, Anthony and I, all the questions people ask us here on the radio, they don't need to ask. They can just Google it.

You know, and so, if it's the dirty little secret of the Dave Ramsey show, there's nothing here that you didn't already know. Or you could just watch one of our nine million hours of YouTube, right, for free. So, you know, that kind of stuff. And the dirty little secret is that it's all right there.

We're spoiled rotten, though. Yeah. And it makes us feel like we're entitled to pleasure. We're entitled to luxury. Yep, that's it. And we are not. When you're broke, you're not entitled. Your brain may say it's entitled, but your brain's being a baby child.

This is The Dave Ramsey personality best-selling author is my co-host today here on the Dave Ramsey Show. Lauren is with us in Davenport, Iowa. Says on my screen, Lauren, you're debt-free. Congratulations. I am. Thank you, Dave. Hi, Rachel. Hi, Lauren. Congratulations. Hey, well done. How much have you paid off? I paid off $32,000 in 24 months. Good for you. And your range of income during that time?

I started making $33,000, and now I'm up to a little over $37,000. Good for you. What do you do for a living? I am an assistant branch manager for a small local bank here in town. Oh, good for you. Very cool. Very cool. So what happened 24 months ago that put you on this journey? Well, my boyfriend, now my husband at the time, kept listening to this guy called Dave and he kept bugging me to listen to these podcasts with him and he'd play them over and over and over again. He did the class in college, and he really wanted me to get on board.

When I was in college, you know, I worked at a bank as a teller, and I always spent everything that I made, never had any money left over, and didn't save a dime. But we were at my sister-in-law's wedding, and Rob came up to me, and he said, I want to introduce you to somebody. And I met my financial peace coordinators at our local church and got signed up and started doing the class and it was the you know all up from there. Oh wow okay so when did you get married? We got married three weeks ago. Oh wow newlyweds and the pandemic you did it. Yeah we did it it. Wow, good for you. So you knocked out the debt completely by yourself then? Yeah, before the wedding, actually, really funny story.

You know, when I started doing the class and, you know, learning all about the baby steps, Rob said, you know, I'll propose if you pay off your debt. So it was like, really? So I just went and I started going at it and going at it. And all my pay paychecks went towards it I lived with my parents for two years while I did it but he surprised me a year early and proposed before I paid it off yeah I paid it off before the wedding come on Rob come on Rob hold the ring hostage to the debt yeah you deserve that Laura no you get engaged I'm so glad and get married married before you go for this. Awesome. How great.

Good, good, good. I guess it gave you some motivation. Oh, it definitely did. That's awesome. Mr. Romantic, here's Dave Ramsey, and let me introduce you at a wedding to a Financial Peace University coordinator. And oh, by the way, I'm holding a ring hostage. This guy's hardcore.

I love him. Oh, you guys are fun well congratulations for you so you shifted obviously the whole way you thought about money the way you handle money because you said you were just kind of like spending whatever you had in your paycheck to sacrificing putting money towards debt the whole thing so what was the hardest part for you uh changing that mindset and going through these motions? I think changing out of that spend, spend, spend, you know, I want to have fun college mentality to being an adult and having a goal and a purpose and knowing what you want to do with your money and make your money work for you in a positive way. I think that was the hardest part about, you know, saying no to people, saying no to friends, saying no to buying that next big thing that comes out.

Just blocking out the noise and just focusing on the goal that you set out for yourself. And I think in the end, once you actually do it and stick to that budget, it is so worth it. It's so interesting that all these people that are not paying any of your bills have an opinion. I like the phrase, blocking out the noise. That's good. That's really good. So the $32,000 was student loans? Student loans and my car. Okay, very cool. Will you ever go back in debt? Not long as Rob's around. Nope. We live together now, so he's watching. That's amazing. Well, it's so fun. You guys are starting a whole new journey.

I mean, marriage, obviously, huge, number one. But number two, no financial stress with bills and payments. I mean, so many people probably wish they were you that are listening, saying, wow, if we just started off our marriage in that stage of life, so young with no payments, you guys are going to kill it. Yeah, absolutely. Congratulations. So you had a Financial Peace University class cheering you on. You had a fiance cheering you on. Who else was cheering you on? My family, my now in-laws cheered me on. The class was actually by their church at their house, so I went every Monday for nine weeks and spent time

with them. We had dinner after class, so they cheered me on. My co-workers at my old job back home cheered me on, and even the customers at the banquet cheer me on. They would come in and sit at my desk and say, how are you doing on your debt-free journey? How's it going? That's neat. Everybody cheered me on. It was great. Very, very cool.

I love it. I love it. Well, very well done, you guys. Very, very proud of you, Lauren. You are a hero. You took control of your life. Well done. Got a copy of Chris Hogan's book for you,

Everyday Millionaires, How Ordinary People Built Extraordinary Wealth and How You Can Too. And that's the next chapter in your story. You are on your way. Well done, well done, well done. All right, it's Lauren in Davenport, Iowa. She paid off $32,000. Listen to these numbers.

In 24 months, making $33,000 to $37,000 a year. That's real. Well done. Count it down. Let's hear a debt-free scream. Three, two, one. I'm debt-free! Yeah!

Well done. Well done. Well done. Janiel is in Springfield, Missouri. Hi, Janiel. How can we help? Hey, Dave. How are you? Great.

What's up? Well, I have a question for you. My husband and I are in baby step four, five, and six, and we are just trying to figure out what amount we should allocate to each of those steps. Particularly with a retirement, we are both in pensions and he pays into his pension 15% each month. And I pay in six and a half to my pension each month. And then I also contribute to a 403B and a Roth to get that up to the 15%. But my question is, should we be doing more because of the fact that it is a pension and not money that we are actually controlling?

Yes, I would like for you to. That's a good way of phrasing that because it's exactly the reasoning. Because you don't control what it's invested in, you don't control how stable it is, you don't control anything there. It's completely out of your control. Now, I'm not suggesting that all pensions are going broke. They're not, but some do. And most of them underperform

because they have so many restrictions and regulations on them on how they're able to invest the money, so they underperform what you could do in mutual funds for yourself in an IRA. So you get an underperforming thing that you don't have control of. So that's the problem. Now, I might keep doing exactly what you're doing though if we can knock the house out real fast what do you owe on the house okay so that so that's my question so and that's the mortgage is like my thing like i want it gone because we actually came to your show

last year because we had paid off our previous home and so we just recently in march bought a new house and um it's going to be our forever house it's exactly what we want it's on land and it was exactly what we wanted so we purchased it and um we owe a hundred thousand on the house what's your household i think that we make around 200 with all of our extra money i would just keep doing what you're doing yeah you know i would not worry about the pension make-up thing. Just keep the 15% going like you got. Throw everything at the house.

Knock that house out as fast as you can, because you're going to knock that out in a year and some change, probably. Okay, yeah. I was kind of figuring maybe like two to three. Maybe not three. Not three. Fifty a year out of 200? You said your household income is $200,000, right?

Yeah, we owe an extra income. I know you only owe $100,000, so $50,000 a year is two years. $50,000 out of $200,000 does it in two years. You should do it in two years or less. But yeah, if you're going to do it in two years or less just hold what you got and then you got then you're a baby step seven and you max out everything on retirement so the question that you're asking about do we do something different because the pension is goes away you don't have that question anymore because it's done you're in baby step seven you're maxing

out everything this is the dave ramsey show MC show. Thanks for joining us, America. Ramsey Personality, Rachel Cruz is my co-host today here on the air. Paying off debt, saving and investing is smart. That is the offense side. The defense side is protecting your family from emergencies. Now, sometimes we get insurance poor because there's nine bazillion kinds of insurance, and most of it's crap, and we know this. But there are ten kinds of insurance that most people need. And depending on what life stage you're in, you might all need them, right?

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you're always glad. When you spend a bunch of money on insurance that you didn't need and it was gimmicky and crappy stuff, you're never glad. You always feel ripped off and you always wonder why. We're going to clarify every bit of that for you free with this five-minute checkup tool. Be sure and check it out. Jamie is with us in Orlando. Hi, Jamie.

Welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show. Hi, Dave. Thanks for taking my call. Sure. What's up in your world? Well, as many others, we've had a pretty crappy year this year. The year of the dumpster fire. Yes.

I got furloughed from my job in March, and I just found out last week that I am getting laid off. Okay. You've been furloughed since March. Have you not gotten another job? Why didn't you quit? Well, because I was under the impression for the large company that I went through that I would be getting my job back because I worked for a large company. Yeah, but for six months you got no pay. Well, no, I was getting unemployment plus the $600 a week in the CARES Act. Yeah, but that wasn't coming because, oh, okay, anyway, whatever. All right, so how can I help today?

Well, a couple of things. We had some unfortunate things happen. I ended up in the hospital after I gave birth in July at 23 weeks, and I lost my twins. Oh, Jamie, I'm sorry. No, yes. It's been a hard year. Now I'm stuck with all the hospital girls, which are still coming in. My husband luckily never got through it. He stayed unemployed the entire time, and he's still working.

Right now it looks like he's going to be able to keep his job. Because I was pregnant, that's also another reason why I didn't get a job because I was pregnant. That makes sense yeah um so now that i'm you know 100 not going back to my job i you know i'm just a little unsure what to do as far as um one you know like the hospital bills and two we were toying with the idea of refinancing our house and, like, you know, like getting a lower interest rate because of that. No. You don't need to refinance anything right now. You guys are just hurting.

Okay. Stop a second because you said hospital bills twice. So did you not have insurance that covered the – I did. I have insurance um i i mean as i should say this as far as like the hospital bills it's a lot it's a lot lower than you know like i know some people do but it's still you know like like four or five thousand dollars okay so you're part of the co-pay and the deductibles is five grand around there okay all right what does your husband make um he's right now i think he's between 65 and 70 what did you use to make what did you use

to make um last year i was around 34 35 um like we were we were pretty smart at the beginning of this whole thing. When I was getting all that extra money, I put everything directly into savings. So how much do you have in savings? And we were able to save up. We have about $18,000. Great. Are the medical bills come in yet? Yes.

Stop, stop, stop, stop. Pay them today. I have not paid them yet. No, I said pay them to stop stop stop pay them today i have not paid them no i said pay them today oh pay them today you and your husband sit down tonight write the checks and pay them because it's only five thousand dollars you it was just a minute just a minute it's only five thousand dollars you have 18 that leaves you 13 he 65, and you guys have been living on his 65, plus or minus your cares and unemployment, which ran out in August anyway, and so you've been living on that since August, right? Yes. The bad news is you lost your job. The good news is it was only a $35,000 job, so it's not that big a deal. You'll get another one. Exactly. Yeah. And so let me stop you just a second, okay?

Okay. How old are you? I'm 31. Okay. My daughter's sitting beside me, same age group. Okay. And what I hear is you have had the worst possible year of your life. Your heart is broken. Just a minute.

Just a minute, baby girl. Your heart is broken, and you're hurting. Okay? And that is the things that you've been through with the miscarriage and with the loss of your job are clouding your ability to see that where you are financially is really not that big a deal. Where you are emotionally makes you a human being, because if you weren't hurting, you wouldn't be human. Anyone who's been through what you've been through this year would be crying right now on the phone. Anyone would be. You should be. You should be hurting, okay?

This is why I'm telling you to write the check, because I don't want these medical bills laying around as a reminder. I want them gone. I want this over. I want to put this chapter behind you. And now you start looking at this job and this loss in the rearview mirror. By the way, they're real and they hurt. But the rearview mirror is smaller than the windshield. Right now, they're right up in front of your face. If you hold your hand right in front of your face, you can't see anything. And that's where you are right this second talking to you.

That's what I'm hearing. Am I wrong? No, you're right. I just, you know, like I'm trying to not freak out. You know, like I'm trying to do what I can to do better. You're allowed to hurt. Yeah. You're allowed to hurt. You're allowed to hurt. You're allowed to hurt a little bit, okay? But we're going to put these things in the rearview mirror,

and the further the distance is in the rearview mirror of the lost job and any losses that any of us have, the less they hurt. That's how grieving works. And you grieve the loss of the job, you grieve the loss of the children. And, Jamie, I think you and your husband, especially you, I mean loss of the job. You grieve the loss of the children. And Jamie, I think you and your husband, especially you, I mean, I really would,

I would sit down with someone. I think a good counselor, someone to walk you through these. Yeah, we, we've been in counseling. That's great. That's so good.

I think that that's, yep. I think there's a lot. Cause that's the best thing for me right now. But you know, I think having someone professionally, I also want to be smart with my money because that's you know where my brain goes and you're okay yeah you know somebody told

me that i should negotiate with the hospital and all that no you should just you should just pay them i don't really know how to you should just pay them tonight just pay them put it in your rearview mirror close that chapter you'll always have that part of your heart that hurts. That'll hurt less and less and less over the years. And the money stuff is separate. I mean, like, it's secondary, Jamie. Like, what you guys went through, losing those

babies, healing from that. I mean, the money, you're good. You're fine. You're fine on the money. You're good. You're good. You're going to be okay. And you're going to get another job. But heal on that side for sure. You're going to get another job, and your money's going to be just fine. This time next year, you're not going to have any issue at all with finances. Yep. Dave Ramsey said you're okay, kiddo.

Okay? You're okay. You're all right. Let's get this behind us. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. This is James Childs, producer of The Dave Ramsey Show. You can listen to Dave,

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