The Ramsey Show - App - Dealing With Messy Family Money Situations (Hour 1)

Episode Date: July 6, 2023

Ken Coleman & Dr. John Delony answer your questions and discuss:  The current jobs report and inflation numbers, "Can I keep charging my sister rent?" "My husband hates his job..." "Can I skip in...vesting to pay off the house?" from the blog: The 7 Baby Steps, "Should we sell our investment property?" "Paying off debt with the debt snowball" from the blog: How the Debt Snowball Method Works Have a question for the show? Call 888-825-5225 Weekdays from 2-5pm ET Here's an EveryDollar deal just for our listeners: get a 14-day free trial PLUS $15 off your first year of premium. Click the link below and start budgeting today! www.everydollar.com/TRS Want a plan for your money? Find out where to start: https://bit.ly/3cEP4n6 Listen to all The Ramsey Network podcasts: https://bit.ly/3GxiXm6 Interested in advertising on The Ramsey Show? https://ter.li/s64ye3 Ramsey Solutions Privacy Policy

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Девочка-пай Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Pods Moving and Storage Studio, this is The Ramsey Show, where we help you win in your life, specifically your money, your relationships, and your work. The phone number to jump in is 888-825-5225. That's 888-825-5225. I'm Ken Coleman, joined by Dr. John Deloney. We're here for you this hour, taking your money questions, of course, and then those relationship questions, mental health stuff. And then John and I love when we're together. We like to take on those nasty work situations that
Starting point is 00:01:03 involve a whole lot of mental health. And then the money comes in there too, John, because people don't want to leave necessarily a nasty situation, but it's killing them. Yeah, and I was waiting for today to talk to you about this stat I saw the other day. Do you mind digging into the work question? I don't. I saw that they doubled the expectation in jobs. Is that right? What do you that they doubled the expectation in jobs. Is that right? What do you mean by doubled the expectation? That there was an expected,
Starting point is 00:01:33 here's how many jobs we think are going to, new jobs are going to be on the market. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it came out, it was doubled? Yeah, over 300,000 jobs. They thought it was going to be in the 150,000 jobs. So again, we're in a weird job economy because unemployment's low, 3.7%. But people are laying, big companies are laying people off because there's this threat of a recession some economists think we're already in a mild recession uh and so anyway needless to say uh you can still get a good gig right now uh and inflation seems to be dipping but the fed says they're going to raise interest rates maybe two more times before the year is out we We are seeing now the Supreme Court ruled just last week that the student loan forgiveness from Biden is not legal. So now student loan payments coming on
Starting point is 00:02:16 in late August. It's about ready to get into a really crazy financial time. And all that to say, people who have control of their finances have more margin which means they have more freedom to pivot when the economy gets weird so who knows where we're going economically john but it's a weird moment these principles work no matter what kind of economy you're in they work especially when things get sideways exactly so we're here for you let's get to the phones triple eight eight-825-5225. Brian starts us off in Cleveland, Ohio. Brian, how can we help? Hey, what's up?
Starting point is 00:02:50 Nice. Thank you guys for taking my call. I was wondering, so I'm 21 years old, and I just bought my first rental property. And I just fixed it up, and it's pretty much all we fixed. But my only question is, my sister wants to move in here, and I want her to move in because, you know, how rent's so high, she pays so much in rent. But how do I keep that business and the family different and separate? So I'm getting a mixed message. You said you want her to move in, you want to be able to help her out, but you're worried that it's going to alter your relationship?
Starting point is 00:03:20 Or do you know her well enough to know it's going to be drama? Well, it's not like it's, it's more of an issue with how I don't want, you know, because our family is so close and I don't like, I would like to keep it separate from the business and family, but I also really want to help her out. Do you think I should, or do you think I shouldn't? Whenever I enter into an agreement like this and I don't have a rental property, but when I enter into agreement with something like with a family member or especially with a close friend, I think the only way through this is extreme, extreme clarity on the front end and making sure you have a separate, this is business. This is when rent is due. You got to pay rent, all that, or this is what's going to happen on the back end
Starting point is 00:04:06 and letting your sister know, I'm going to have to run this as a business. But yes, the chances of you running this into a mess. Yeah. That's a, that's a very real possibility when you do business with family. What do you think, Ken? Okay. Well, I actually, I'm curious to know why you keep saying the business of family. And I think I know what you mean, but I'm just wondering if there's something else there. Well, it's not really business of family. And I think I know what you mean, but I'm just wondering if there's something else there. Well, it's not really business of family. Like, you know, this is like one of my first family members actually bought a house, one of their kids.
Starting point is 00:04:36 And so I just, you know, there's a lot of, like, renters. A lot of my family members rent, and I was just, you know, I thought it was a good opportunity, you know, if I start buying houses, I can rent to them. Okay, I see. I didn you know if i start buying houses i can rent to them but okay i see no that's it yeah that makes sense okay so john dug in i thought on the right thing here i don't know sure we got a good answer are you worried that you and your sister uh in this relationship now it changes when she becomes a renter from you and you are her landlord. Are you worried about that in general because of the nature of how the relationship changes? Or are you worried, meaning it could be any family member and you'd have the same question,
Starting point is 00:05:11 or are you worried specifically about this situation with her? That's what I'm curious about. I'm more worried about the situation here, if that makes sense. Well, I think John saw, I think you heard that. And so when John asked you that, and now that we get some clarity on that, I think you need to listen to that red flag. What specifically, if it were another family member, you wouldn't have pause. What about this particular relationship causes pause?
Starting point is 00:05:38 It's more like, you know, I bought this house, and I was talking about it. She said she was going to save a lot of money and that was going to be really good. It'd be really good for both of us. But I thought maybe since she might be my sister, she could help me out a little bit. I've asked her a couple of times and she's always turned me down and said, no, I'm not going to help you. But to me, that's like the red flags about it because it's like, oh, well, are you going to keep the property up then since you're not really helping? I'm just very worried about that, if that makes sense. I would come out of the gate and just do what Ken said.
Starting point is 00:06:08 You're 21 years old. This is not the time of your life to start divorcing yourself from your innate wisdom. This is the time to lean into it. And as a 21-year-old, you're going to have to practice it. And these lessons are going to pay dividends when you're 30, 40, and 50. But if your gut says no, dude, don't. Don't. Make a rule that says, hey guys, I just don't rent to family. I love y'all too much. And I want to make sure that business doesn't mix with family. And by the way, can I give you
Starting point is 00:06:35 some unsolicited advice? Yeah, of course. If you're running around as a 21-year-old leveraging rental properties in Ohio, you're going to be up for a world of hurt. If you're buying these places with cash, cool. But if you've watched a lot of social media and you are trying to put 7% down or no money down or 2% down and you're buying a rental house and you're going to immediately roll it into somebody else, I'm just telling you right now, none of my job would exist if my boss hadn't done that exact same thing and gone stone broke when the economy turned. If I knew... Go ahead.
Starting point is 00:07:16 Oh, sorry. I put 20% down on the foreclosure. I bought about $70,000 and I've been fixing it up and it's probably... Is this your only home? Yeah. Okay, great. So this is your primary home. Can you move into it and just have it be your house? Well, I was going to live in an apartment with my buddy so I can live for free because when I'm charging, my buddy split the rent for the apartment and basically I'd live for free in the apartment, if that makes sense. So I can save up more money and pay off this house as quickly as I can and buy
Starting point is 00:07:47 my second, second house. I get the sentiment. And I'll just tell you personally, as a guy who's owned a bunch of houses, the house I'm living in right now, I told this yesterday, um,
Starting point is 00:07:57 was thoroughly inspected. And I got a second inspection on, on a couple of other issues. And in the last 36 months, I've replaced a roof, an air conditioner. I've got thousands and thousands of dollars in electrical repairs I got to do. So I'm telling you right now,
Starting point is 00:08:14 your living for free scam is not going to be free. I promise you. That's just from a guy that's owned a bunch of houses. We want you to live in that. Get the roommate over there. Pay this sucker off. And now you've got your first property. And that's the way to do this. I agree. We want you to live in that. Get the roommate over there. Pay this sucker off, and now you've got your first property, and that's the way to do this. I like that. Roommate can
Starting point is 00:08:29 help you live for free. I'd bring the roommate over to the house. There you go. And pay off the house early. I like that. That would be a great play for you long-term, my friend. Again, you're 21. So anyway, red flag. Listen to it on the sister. Move forward. Without that, I think you're going to be better off. Thank you, Brian, for the call. For the rest of you, don't move. More of your calls coming up he's john deloney i'm ken
Starting point is 00:08:48 coleman this is the ramsey show welcome back to the ramsey show i'm ken coleman joined by don dr john deloney i can't talk there's too, the J, the whole thing threw me off there. Whatever they hired me, the medication's kicking in. They put me on the board as Don Deloney. Oh, did they? That's how they did it, man. I like that. That's very good. Anyway, he is Dr. John Deloney. I'm Ken Coleman. Welcome to the show. We're here to talk to you about your life, your money, your work, your relationships. By the
Starting point is 00:09:21 way, all three of those issues are inextricably connected. If you're not winning in one of them, there's a good chance you might be losing in the other. We want to help you today. 888-825-5225 is the number. 888-825-5225. Carla is joining us now in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Carla, how can we help? Hey guys, thank you so much. I'm grateful to be able to speak to you guys. So my husband, he took a promotion. I think he regrets taking it. This coming early next year, he will be there 20 years and he has a pension. So I know he's sticking through it until then.
Starting point is 00:10:00 He's super high anxiety. I'm kind of very worried about him and his health as we're overall healthy people with how much stress. And so I'm just wondering how I can be as supportive as possible. How do I be a supportive wife while I watch him go through such negativity? I'm trying to be light and positivity. Sometimes it feels draining. So I'm just curious the best way I can go about being as supportive. Tell us a little bit more about this recent promotion. How long ago was the
Starting point is 00:10:33 promotion? He's been there 20 years. How long has he been in the new role? About two years. He did work with his predecessor for a while. and so with that person being gone, he's really taken on a lot of responsibility. All right, that's my next question is, in that 20 years, when did it start to get as bad as it is now? Has it been this way a while, or is it connected to this promotion? It's connected to the promotion. So he did not have all this anxiety and all this junk and all this negativity prior to this?
Starting point is 00:11:11 He did. emotion so he did not have all this anxiety and all this junk and all this negativity prior to this he did it's just he's very high anxiety person and very perfectionist okay so he had the anxiety making it worse okay that's what i'm trying to figure out for john here because i know you're ready to dive in but so you're telling me the high anxiety was already there uh but this has made it way worse yes but he wasn't miserable prior to this is what I'm trying to get at. Was he? Was he miserable? Not miserable. Okay. I'm just trying to get the levels of how this particular promotion has changed things because this plays into this.
Starting point is 00:11:38 Yes. All right, John. I know you're ready to dig in on this. Well, so is he planning on being done in less than a year when his pension becomes vested? Well, that's kind of another question I had is he's been doing this for so long, he doesn't know what else he would want to do after. And so I'm trying to do my best to kind of guide and give him, you know, resources to figure out what that could be. We can help him with that. Yes, we can help him, but this is a bigger issue. Yeah. You're, you're now rolling over, you're becoming his mom. You're not being
Starting point is 00:12:17 his wife. Um, let me just tell you what happened in my house. That's the best I can give you. There came a moment when my wife sat down with me and it wasn't a finger in my face and it wasn't a yelling fight. It was not on the back heels of another fight. It was us just having some connection time, just talking. And she said, I'm watching my husband die right in front of my eyes. And she said, I'm watching my husband die right in front of my eyes. And she said, I don't like it. I don't know what to do about it, but it's hurting me and it's hurting you and it's hurting the kid. And it was not her just trying to, like you said, be positive and be like, Hey, it's going to be okay. It was her acknowledging. I see what this is doing to you. And, um, that for me was an impetus to, I've got to do some different things.
Starting point is 00:13:13 And for me, I stayed in the job. I, but I had to have some boundaries here at work. I had to take care of my physical body outside of work. I started exercising. I had to go see a counselor and deal with some crap I hadn't dealt with in a long time. I had to go do a bunch of stuff. I had to get some different training on some things. And so you can't be the person who is shoveling all this stuff at your husband because you're going to turn into his mom and you're going to make sure his socks are put in the right drawer at the end of the day. But he does need you as somebody he trusts and loves to also be a person who can tell him the hard truth, not about what's wrong with him, but about how this is affecting you. So the conversation is about you. And you might feel like he doesn't need one more thing.
Starting point is 00:13:56 He might finally be at peace because somebody he loves sees him for who he really is. And that's a guy who loves his family and a guy who's out of gas. So that's what I was wondering. So it's not a selfish thing for me to tell him that, how I feel about it. It's a gift to him. It will be very hard to hear, and he might not have the tools to deal with it on the back end. Okay. But you are, here's the deal. You're keeping secrets from him, and he feels that disconnection, and he's trying to solve it in the only way he knows how, which is to go do more work. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:33 Our communication's really taken a toll from all of this. Yes. But we both have recognized that it is something we're working on, but that's exactly how it feels like a big secret. There is a biological consequence to keeping secrets at a marriage. It'll bury your marriage. And please don't use a fight as the moment to dump a wheelbarrow full of secrets on somebody. Set up a Saturday morning. We're all going to go to breakfast and just have an open. We're a year out from you retiring.
Starting point is 00:15:04 I need to tell you how I'm experiencing the last couple of years. Okay. And I love you too much to not say the truth. And this is about how you feel, not about what he's doing. You see the difference? Yes. And Carla, let me add to that really quickly. When you're saying this, this is for him.
Starting point is 00:15:21 You understand what I mean? You're concerned what John said is so powerful the way you're positioning this. But here's the thing he has to understand. And since we're not keeping secrets anymore, you can tell him that you called, and I'd actually let him watch this on YouTube. That's the power of YouTube, because I want to speak to him for a second. There are two issues going on here. There is his anxiety, John, and the perfectionism that she pointed out. That's coming from somewhere deeper, and that's in your lane. But that's him. And then there's his job. And the common denominator in both of those is him.
Starting point is 00:15:55 He has the choice. He has the power to get healing on the one issue, the perfectionism, the anxiety, all that stuff. But he also has the power to go, you know what? This is not the best seat on the bus issue, the perfectionism, the anxiety, all that stuff. But he also has the power to go, you know what? This is not the best seat on the bus for me. And it's not worth gritting and bearing it for one more year while he's trying to get healthy. In this case, what I'm saying is, whatever's going on with this particular seat on the bus, it has gotten worse. And the seat isn't helping whatever else is going on. And I just want you to somehow articulate that, Carla, to go to give him some permission and some freedom to go, I can make these changes. I should make these changes. And my wife is supportive of it. That's kind of what I want
Starting point is 00:16:38 to make that point, John, because then he's going to feel less, I hope, defensive and feel empowered to go, oh, I can actually make some choices. We'll get to the point of deciding what's next. And I'd love to give him the assessment, the Get Clear assessment, and my book, From Paycheck to Purpose. We'll give you those as gifts, Carla, in just a moment. But, John, I wanted to bring it back to you on that because that's what I'm hearing. He needs to see that he's the common denominator which means he can change he's got to hear that he can change and Carla can't say you have to do all of this stuff that's right and so Carla a great gift my wife gave me was she started going to a counselor and she said I'd love for you
Starting point is 00:17:19 to join me and I because I'm a genius was well, I already know all the answers to what they're going to say. That's what I do for a living. And so I put it off, but she kept going and she kept going and then she'd come home. And then I started noticing a different wife in an amazing way. And then I finally reached out to her counselor and said, Hey, would you see me too? And I will tell you after the last six months, my whole life trajectory is different. But it wasn't my wife saying, you got to go, you got to go, you got to go. She was saying, I love you so much. I wish you would. And then she went and made an appointment for herself. And I got to watch her walk that path with a light out into
Starting point is 00:17:59 the distance. And I got to see it safe out there. And then I headed on myself. You're a good lady, Carla. Thank you so much for trusting us and we're hoping you and your husband, I'd re-watch this and talk through it together. No secrets here and there's no reason for anyone to have any shame. Both of you are good people that are navigating an uncertain situation and you're going to come out on the other side. Thank you again. Hey, don't move folks. More of your calls coming up here on The Ramsey Show. I'm Ken Coleman, joined by my colleague, Dr. John Deloney. And we are here for you, America, taking your calls about your money,
Starting point is 00:19:01 your relationships, and your work. Already had some really interesting calls calls combining all three of those. So if you're just feeling stuck today, you're maybe new to the program, you're going, I don't know if I trust these guys. We would love to earn your trust. We want to help you because there's a very clear path forward despite what you feel right now. And we are here for you. 888-825-5225. 888-825-5225. As I speak, a brand new listener, Sam, joins us from the great city of Austin, Texas. Sam, how can we help? Hey, John and Kane, how are you?
Starting point is 00:19:35 We're having a blast. What's going on? Hey, I have a question for you. I recently was able to pay off all my debt, and I'm already at step three. I have the three to six months. I'm getting ready to move on to step four. Nice. Invest at 15% in retirement.
Starting point is 00:19:53 The only question I have would be, would it make sense to defer that and pay off the home early, or if the 15% is a must? I'm kind of addicted to paying it off. Yeah, man, you're talking my language. I get it. How close are you to paying the house off? Like if you went full bore, how quickly could you pay it off? About two and a half years,
Starting point is 00:20:17 and it would be about four if I did the 15%, give or take. Oh, man, you are right. Do you have one job right now yes i have one job and i also have a pension how old are you 41 what's your income uh so combined it's uh about 260. whoo here's the deal man I know there's can you come with the more correct answer, the more global answer? I can't in good conscience tell you
Starting point is 00:20:52 not to do this. If you were going to be any more than two and a half years, I would tell you exhale and take a break. But if you tell me that at 43 you're going to have your house paid off and it's're going to have your house paid off and it's not going to kill, it's not like your wife's in on this. Y'all are all in on this
Starting point is 00:21:12 together. Um, and y'all are going to sprint for just another 24 months, another 30 months. I, that's what I would do. Let me be more clear. That's exactly what I did. I just paused it and ran. If it's going to be beyond that though, what you don't want to do is look up and be three, five, seven, 10 years, and you don't have any retirement. But I did get so allergic to that debt. It made me insane. What do you think, Ken? Well, you put me in a very interesting situation here as you've decided to tell someone to pause maybe step four to go into six. I'll tell you what. I know, it's not smart. I'll tell you what we believe and what we teach. We teach the steps in order and we're in four, five, and six many times at the same time. Do
Starting point is 00:21:55 both of them. What I would do is I would continue investing the 15%, but what I would do is I would take that number. So in your head, if you pause the 15%, what was that amount of money that would allow you to change it from four years to two? What's the amount of money that you would pull out of the 15%? So it would be about $36,000 a year. Okay. So if we keep investing at 15%, then I would say if I want to knock this out in two years, I've got to come up with an
Starting point is 00:22:25 additional $36,000 on top of you guys. You guys have a great joint income. So I'm going to say, I'm going to keep paying the 15%, but I've got in my mind two and a half years or whatever it is, and I would say, how do I come up with $36,000 more? That's a minimum to reach that goal. You might go, well, wait a second. What if I could come up with an additional $56,000 more, that's a minimum to reach that goal. You might go, well, wait a second. What if I could come up with an additional $56,000 through a second job, selling some stuff, going crazy, and now I pay it off in a year and a half. So we would prefer that you pay the 15% off and then find that if you're really wanting to knock it out in two years, come up with $36,000 in additional money. Somebody of your ability and your discipline, I think you could do that. So I would ask you to consider that.
Starting point is 00:23:06 But I understand what John is saying. Ken is right. Just make no bones about it. Well, I'm following the Dave plan. That's right. Ken is right. But I also understand what you're saying, and I don't think that you're wrong. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:17 That's why I said, what do you want me to say? You make a lot of sense, my friend. You gave the right thing. I reached a point where the debt made me insane. Well, you were already insane. That just gave you point where the debt made me insane and when my wife well you are already insane they just gave you magnified the insanity that's right um but yeah the the you don't want to look up and have it been three four five or you're almost there and then something happens or you need a new boat there in austin because it's so beautiful um and then all of a sudden it turns into three, four, and five years, and you look up and you're 46 years old and you're not investing. Makes sense.
Starting point is 00:23:49 Is that about as clear as mud? Yeah. It makes the most sense long-term for rational people to do exactly what Ken just said. And, Sam, run the numbers. Okay, we gave you some common sense advice. We gave you an opinion in the middle of our baby steps, but run the numbers.
Starting point is 00:24:12 Run the numbers with your financial pro, you know? And run the numbers. Okay, if I keep investing at 15% over the next four years, run those numbers so that you can see why we would want you to continue to invest in that time. And the difference between two years of paying off the house, I think if you run those alternate numbers of not investing, I think that's a good exercise for you.
Starting point is 00:24:31 Because I do think, and John, I think has nailed this here, this is an emotional question, and you're a dude who's very disciplined and you're crushing it, but you're just so mad at the debt. And so we want you to pull back from that while it's a good emotion towards that debt. Long term, I think you come out better investing for four years and having a paid off house. The numbers won't lie, but I want you to see that on your own. Does that make sense?
Starting point is 00:24:55 Yeah, I don't want to miss out on that opportunity cost of that 15%. Well said. You said it better than I said. You give yourself good advice. So appreciate the call, my friend. That's awesome. Let's go to Jenny in Salt Lake City. Jenny, how can we help? Hey, thanks for taking my call. I have a question kind of similar to the one before. My husband and I were trying to decide if we should sell our rental property.
Starting point is 00:25:21 We don't have any debt besides our first mortgage. And then we bought this rental property in April, 2020. So right after COVID, we bought it for a hundred thousand. We put it on a 15 year at three and a half percent. And it's, it's two hours away. So it's not convenient to like, if my husband has to do something on it, but we bought it because it was cheap, like for, for where we live. Um, and so we're looking at it now and I had this whole plan that we could pay it off in the next year and a half. But then my husband started thinking that maybe we should just sell it. Um, and then we can put that towards our mortgage so that our first mortgage, so that we
Starting point is 00:26:05 can get that paid off a lot sooner. So why does he want to sell it? You had this good plan. It's very doable, but he came at it and went, nah, I think I'm done with it. I want to know why he's done with it. So like I said, it's two hours away. And the reason why it was cheaper, because here in Salt Lake, it's quite expensive for any type of house. So it's not in the best city. And so we've had a big turnaround in tenants. And we've always had a duplex ourselves that we had lived in. So we've been landlords for over 15 years, but this is a turnaround of every six months. This is a pain in the you know what? That's what this is. He's done with it.
Starting point is 00:26:47 So if we sell it today, how much do you walk away with? So we could walk away between $225,000 and $250,000. Good God, sell it. Of what it's asking for. Sell it right now. We only owe under $80,000. Okay. Okay, so you're going to get $250,000, you owe $80,000 on it, and then how much do you owe on your primary home?
Starting point is 00:27:03 So we owe $260,000 260 i'd sell this tonight no brain i'd have a sign in the yard now no brainer because number one it's already a pain neither one of you you're trying to justify keeping it it's a pain and it changes your life in two ways it removes the pain and then it makes the profit on having a cash house. You're going to pay that house off quickly. My goodness, this is a no-brainer, Jenny. It feels like you're the one trying to talk yourself into this. Well, it's just like going through the cash flow
Starting point is 00:27:35 and realizing to buy a property in the future, it's going to be $400,000 to $500,000. It doesn't matter. Your cash flow is going to be massive when you don't have a mortgage on your primary home. Talk about that cash flow. And your husband maybe doesn't want to do real estate anymore. You'll need to have that conversation because it sounds like he doesn't want to be a landlord anymore. The turnover, you can hear it. The turnover every six months. It's two hours away.
Starting point is 00:27:59 It's not a dream property. Gone. Done. Bye. Bye, Felicia. I love that. Don't move. More of your calls. They're stacked up. They're lined up like planes awaiting to land. We're going to get to all of them. Don't move. This is The Ramsey Show. I'm Ken Coleman. Dr. John Deloney joins me this hour as we take your calls, 888-825-5225. Hey, are you struggling big time in a relationship situation? How about a work situation, maybe some toxicity? John and I love to do those calls together.
Starting point is 00:29:02 He's got a unique vantage point from our areas, especially he's in the relationship and mental health area. I'm in the workspace. We talk about your money as well. So that is the opportunity today, 888-825-5225. Let's go back to the phones. Alex is joining us in Erie, Pennsylvania. Alex, how can we help? Hello.
Starting point is 00:29:24 How's everyone afternoon doing? We're having a blast. How are you doing? I'm doing okay. All right. My question is, I've been on the Baby Step 1, just got it done, and I've been kind of on Baby Step 2 for a while, paying off my credit cards. And I'm stuck with the decision between paying off my student loans or a car that I had to purchase. Okay. Student loans are about $20,000 in different. All right, Alex. Hey, Alex, are you moving around? Alex, you're cutting out on us. Yeah. Can you hold still,
Starting point is 00:30:01 hold that phone still, see if we can get you a little bit better? All right, so say it again. Between your house and student loans in your car. Yeah, my student loans is about $20,000, and my car is also about $20,000. And what did you say? You have credit card as well? Well, that's all paid off. I just got it paid off last month. Okay, so the only debts you have are the $20,000 student loan and a $20,000 car? Correct.
Starting point is 00:30:28 And what's your question? Well, the question is, I'm just able to start paying them off, but the interest rates on them are just crazy on my car. It's 7%. Okay. But my student loans are $2,000, $ 4,000, well, 2% and 4%. And in the baby steps, they always want you to start with the lowest amount, which is stuck with, which would technically be the student loans by like a thousand dollars. But if I don't, if I keep paying off my student loans, I'll in the
Starting point is 00:31:09 long run pay more off of my car. I'll have to pay more for the car due to that like 7% interest rate. Are your student loans consolidated or are they in six or seven different smaller loans all lumped together? They're in separate smaller loans. A few of them are like 3% and a few are 4%. Yeah, I know it weighs on you. I personally, whenever I was going through this process, don't care about the interest rates. What we have found time and time again for decades now
Starting point is 00:31:43 is the psychology of little wins is what keeps people running. And so if you're taking multiple loans, five or six or seven different loans, and you are, one's $2,000, one's $4,000, one's $6,000, and they all add up to $20,000. And then you look over and you have a car loan for $21,000. I would line up those loans, smallest to largest, and knock each one of them out over and over and over and over again. You're going to be surprised at how much the $150 here, the $300 here, the $250 here, when you're ready to start paying off your car and that's the last debt you have and all those payments are rolling towards that one thing, it will go quicker than you think it will. And let's take a look at the car. Let's take a look at this car. How
Starting point is 00:32:28 much is it worth? The car is worth about $23,000. All right. And you feel like you can get $23,000 on the open market with it? Have you done the Kelly Blue Book and you got that number pretty correct? Yeah. All right. The car is relatively new. I had to get a car pretty quickly, and because my parents had to co-sign regardless of practically anywhere I would have looked, they would not let me get a used car. First of all, is it your money or mom and dad's money? It was my money that I saved, those under their account so well i get it but we need to clean up this car so i changed my mind i would sell that car private market this afternoon too and then how much cash do you have on hand not that much okay but here's the deal
Starting point is 00:33:18 you need to sell this car and you get a you get a three thousand dollar car and trust me you can get a three thousand dollar car that'll get from a to b and mom and dad don't get a $3,000 car, and trust me, you can get a $3,000 car that'll get from A to B, and mom and dad don't get a say in it because you need to pay your mom and dad back or get them off this thing, either this loan out of your life. And how much is your car payment a month? I'm going to give you some real numbers here. What's your car payment? My car payment is $450.
Starting point is 00:33:38 Dude, you just got a $450 raise. Now that $450 right there goes into these student loans. You're knocking out those student loans pretty quickly. If you work a second job or third job, you're a young guy, you're able, you can go make $15, $20, $25 an hour in some labor positions. And you're knocking this out just like John said. And then we can upgrade on the car. But right now we're going to get rid of this stuff and get rid of it quick. How old are you, brother? I'm 22. All right. So I'm going to tell you something. It took me a long time to learn. I have some of the best parents on planet Earth. I love my mom and my dad. They're both still alive. They're both still married. They're both very, very wise,
Starting point is 00:34:19 and they are a gift. And they do not get a vote into how I spend my money, how I raise my kids, what I do with my career. The earlier you can adopt the understanding that your mom and dad do not get a vote into your adult life, they can give you wisdom, they can walk alongside you. It's their job to give you opinions on everything. That's what mom and dads are supposed to do. It's your job as an adult to internalize. You don't get a vote unless I specifically ask, hey dad, how would you handle this situation? Or hey mom, how would you handle the situation? And I do do that. But bro, your mom and dad don't get a vote on what kind of car you have to drive. And that's a recipe for being broke. You bought a car that you cannot afford,
Starting point is 00:35:09 and they put you in that position. Don't do that. Sell the car, man. And you're going to get a car that nobody's going to date you over. So what, man? So what? We just hit you with a lot.
Starting point is 00:35:22 Where's your head at on this? So I did have a pretty beat-up car before that, but my reason for getting the new car was it was reliable, and for my job, I have to at least have a presentable car because I'm in something that's reliable. What's your job? I need a lot of maintenance. I work at a company in my apartment that is really strict on cars. What?
Starting point is 00:36:01 You work for a company in your apartment? Yeah. I don't even understand what that means. So they have, like, policies on, hey, if you have a beat-up car, it's a term for, you know. I would dare a company to fire you. I don't even understand what you're saying. Because you have a used car. Can you park around the corner? They don't want a beat-up old car in the I don't even understand what you're saying. Can you park around the corner?
Starting point is 00:36:26 They don't want to beat up old car in the parking lot? Is that what you're saying? Yeah. Dude. Yeah, nonsense. I'd park it in the front row. I would park it in the front row, and I'd take a chain to the hood. But even that, even if that's the issue.
Starting point is 00:36:40 Quit your job. Good gosh, dude. Pull around the corner. Yeah. I mean, bro, listen listen we just laid it out for you you don't want to sell your car and that's fine you can be in debt for another couple years you can knock your lights out um we'll send you here's what i'm gonna do i'm gonna send you fpu for free financial peace university i want you to go through it but you gotta promise dude you're gonna have to watch all the lessons and actually sit down and internalize this stuff because you clearly didn't get this from home but you're gonna have to learn this stuff we're not telling you to sell your car because we don't like your
Starting point is 00:37:11 car we're not telling you to not sell your car we don't want you to have fun we're telling you to sell your car because we want you to be free yeah yeah and we want you to stop having to go to mommy and daddy to coastline alone as an adult and i don't want you working at a place that doesn't want you there because of the status of your car. That's insanity. I choose to believe Alex. Someone has told him that, but there's all kinds of violations on that. I've got to believe there's some HR red flags if a company were to say, you can't drive that car in the parking lot.
Starting point is 00:37:40 I'm assuming in a right-to-work state they can tell you whatever they want to. They can fire you for whatever they want. I'm assuming in a right-to-work state, they can tell you whatever they want to. They can fire you for whatever they want. I don't know. But if that was me and that was really the case, I'm pulling the car around the corner and I'll walk a half a mile. I'm not going to take out a $20,000 loan to keep an entry-level job. $450
Starting point is 00:37:57 a month, my friend. That's what we're telling you to get rid of. And think about how the $450 a month pays off the rest of those loans. That's what we want you to consider. But you do you think about how the $450 a month pays off the rest of those loans. That's what we want you to consider. But you do you, man. Appreciate the call. I want to thank Dr. John Deloney for hanging out with me this hour,
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