The Ramsey Show - App - Don't Depend on Anyone Else to Fix Your Financial Mess (Hour 1)

Episode Date: July 19, 2024

Live from Nashville, Tennessee, this is The Ramsey Show. I'm John Deloney, joined by my good friend George Camel, and we are talking everything money and building wealth and doing work that you actually want to show up for. Talking about your marriage, your relationships, your mental and emotional health, whatever you got going on in your life, we're here for you. 888-825-5225. That's 888-825-5225. We're taking your calls live. There's no net. It's just you and me and George and millions of our closest friends. When you put it that way, John,

it is a little frightening. Nah. Nah. We have Kelly Daniel producing today, so I think we're in good hands. I know Grandpa is out of the building and Fun Ant is here. That's awesome. Very cool. Alright, let's go out to San Diego, California and talk to Alexander. Not the great, just regular Alexander. What's awesome. Very cool. Alright, let's go out to San Diego, California and talk to

Alexander. Not the great, just regular Alexander. What's up, dude? Hey, how's it going, gentlemen? Good. What's up, man? Yeah, so I'm currently on a military training exercise and I'm just going over my finances

and stuff like that. I came across the Baby Steps and it just really revamped my whole envisioning about my finances, trying to get my life back on track. I'm 30 years old, married to an amazing wife. And my question is just trying to handle unity and transparency in the household when it comes to finances and trying to get on the page. Yeah, that's basically my question. Do me a quick favor. Talk directly into that microphone. So you're telling me you found the baby steps,

you stumbled on us on one of the Internet's channels, and it's ringing a bell with you, and you want to know how you can be more transparent and united with your wife when it comes to money conversations. Is that right? Yes, sir. Okay. Where are you not transparent and where are you not feel united when it comes to your money?

So I feel like we're on the same page. We go over our finances. We talk about how we want to change and we're both on the same page. It's just the fact that when it comes to holding each other accountable and own over finances, if one of us expends too much money on certain things, my wife, for example, I would confront her about it. And then she would make the statement of she works and that she wants to be treated like a child, but I want us to just be on the same page and worry about the future rather than, you know, the now moment. And I'm trying to get us out of debt and I just feel like we're not on the same page I was wondering like yeah so their methods like kind of be like hey babe you know I'm thinking about the future

yeah there are here's a personal question do you treat her like a child? Only when it comes to things I'm passionate about. There you go. So her accusations to you are right. My guess is you come at her, you'll have a mission, you have a plan, you've got a military brain, and you know how to succeed in this operation. It's black and white. Do this, and if you don't, you didn't do this. You failed.

We failed the mission. There we go. And for her, she's like, let's just go ahead and get guacamole while we're out and you see that as mission failure and she's like dude what are you doing right so you're not gonna like my answer you i can make up something or i can just tell you the straight up truth which one you want you can tell me the straight up truth oh dang one you want? You can tell me the straight up truth. Oh, dang it. I was so excited for the alternative. You can make up something and then tell me the truth. How about that? I'll just go straight with the truth. All right. I'm going to over

gender this and that's not fair because it's not applicable to everybody. It just tends to be the way we hear this on the show. And you are this to a t and it's not a bad thing it just an is this money situation this getting out of debt this building wealth as a family it's got a plan it is an abcd or actually it's a steps one through seven that's a solvable problem it's about discipline and let's just knock this thing out for your wife there is emotion with the spending with the life i want to live the way i want this thing to feel this this ride you and i are taking on forever together um having to deal with loneliness while you're out on training or out on deployment the looking around and making sure our family feels okay, feels right.

And so I want you to sit down tonight, take her out somewhere nice in San Diego. And she's going to say, oh, I thought we were on a budget. And you said, I'm just pausing it for one meal. And I want you to take her out and I want you to put your spreadsheet, because I know you knucklehead, I've already put this in a spreadsheet and I want you to, however you've mapped it out, I want you to put it on the table and I want you to say, this was me trying to love you and I'm sorry because I was wrong. And then I want you to look at her and say, I am scared to death about our financial future. I'm nervous that I'm not providing enough. I'm nervous that we're going

to be 35 years old and we're not going to have enough money in the bank. I'm nervous about kids we have yet or don't have yet and them going to college. I'm scared to death about all of this. I don't know how to best walk alongside you and I feel like you don't hear me so how teach me some language where i can communicate because because when i come at you and i'm like you spent money and you did this and then she feels like i'm getting parented which makes her yeah it's been more money right here's here's the magic word that you're gonna hate you got to be vulnerable and tell her what you actually feel. Okay. And you have had that trained out of you,

appropriately so, but you have to do that in this situation because she's not responding to your charts and graphs. She will respond to your heart. That's beautiful. Is that fair? Yeah, I appreciate that a lot. Thank you.

So what does... Underneath the charts and the graphs and the money and the, I want to drive nicer cars and finally be able to buy a house in San Diego, California, underneath all that practice with me, what's your heart on this deal? What scares you? Honestly, like you had to do it too. I feel like I'm 27 and i'm just now educating myself on all this and five years from now i just want to be able to provide and be the man that you know

i didn't have growing up as a father figure just like now i'm going to house and take care of my wife now she hears those words it's going to change her entire attitude toward this plan and if you couple that with hey i, I want to make this fun. I don't want to make this feel like boot camp. What would make this fun for you? What are some things we can do to celebrate the wins? Maybe she's in charge of the visual graphs and things we can fill out and the color charts, and we celebrate every thousand bucks we pay off.

Remind yourselves of the why, why you both agreed that this was the right path. And think about where you're going to be five years from now and how grateful you'll be for the choices you made day to day. Do you get worked up? Yes, sir. Do you have like a, when you get fired up, do you get pretty worked up? I never stress out. Okay.

You mean by that? No, no, no. I mean, I'll just say it this way because we're getting up against the clock. Oh, like passionate? I don't yell and I don't scream. That's just not how I roll. But George will tell you, my wife will tell you, when I get fired up about something, you can feel the nuclear reactor in my chest. You can feel it.

Yeah. And the words in my house that changed everything was when I told my wife, I just want us to find peace in this home. I want this to be a place that both of us can't wait to get back to after a trip yeah after work after whatever what must be true for us to want to come back here and for me for my wife both of us thankfully it was not own anybody anything I'm not bringing the extra baggage through the front door every day when i get there and so it might be i want to get out of debt cool why dude because

i want to come home and laugh i want to come home and hug i want to come home and decide are we making out tonight are we going to the movies tonight like are we doing boat like we get to decide that not coming home with a as a a ball of stress, talk to your wife from your heart, not from your spreadsheet and say the magic words. I was wrong. I love you. Welcome back to the Ramsey show. I'm John Deloney joined by George Camel. And I want you to stop what you're doing. Cause I'm about to ruin the image and the style that you're used to. I remember that song. Hey, listen.

Don't miss your chance to join us on the Live Like No One Else cruise. The cruise. A seven-day cruise. There's going to be Kool-Aid everywhere because this is Ramsey people. Like, in the cult people it's going to be the greatest

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it's just going to be rad. We're going to be going all over the place. We're taking over the entire ship, the whole ship. We're going to Turks and Caicos, St. Thomas, Puerto Rico, the Bahamas.

Come on, pretty mama. Wow. There was a lot going on there. We're not going to Key Largo or Montego. That's the next cruise. Hopefully, hopefully.

When's it happening, John? It's going to happen March 22nd through the next cruise, hopefully. Hopefully. When's it happening, John? It's going to happen March 22nd through 29th, 2025. Which means you've got time to plan, time to budget. Well, here's what's awesome. Time to get your deposit in. This is for people who have paid their

debts off. Yes. They have their fully funded emergency fund. And all you have to do is put down a $600 deposit, so you don't have to put the whole cabin down and all that kind of stuff. $600 deposit. Just seriously do it right now. Tell your family, we've got spring break taken care of this upcoming year.

You never plan anything. You never do anything. You always make me plan everything. I got you, honey. 600 bucks. Put it down right now. Go to ramsaysolutions.com slash cruise. The cabins will sell out.

This whole thing will sell out. The last time we did this, it sold out, and then we had the cabins. And now we're bringing it back, so this thing's going to sell out. RamseySolutions.com slash cruise. Just put down your $600 deposit right now. Tell your whole family how much you love them.

You've already taken care of spring break. Let's get this thing sold out and off to... which one of these places are you most happy about um i think turks and cacos just sounds the fanciest to me i've been to zero of these places yeah anything's fancy to me because i've never been on a cruise i went to arby's the other night i just stopped for a minute took it all in i was like this is a nice place yeah i'm excited just to get to go on this cruise exactly and you're gonna have provide some entertainment i heard you're gonna be doing all the guitar solos from your favorite songs. Just the solos. No backing music.

I heard you're going to be in the corner doing stand-up jokes. I'm actually thinking about it. That might be one reason to go. You should say that off-air so that people will actually put down their deposit. That's fair. It's going to be tough. Maybe we'll do a comedic duo. We'll be like a Steve Martin, Martin Short thing.

That's probably not going to happen. Okay. That won't happen. But I think it could be duo. We'll be like a Steve Martin, Martin Short thing. It's probably not going to happen. Okay. That won't happen. But I think it could be great. It could be great. We'll do that in the Bahamas. Why there? Let's go out to Alberta, Canada and talk to Jessie.

What's up, Jessie? Hi there. Thanks for taking my call. Of course. What's going on? So me and my husband have paid off $200,000 in debt in the past two years. Yes. What'd you sell? Pardon? Did you sell something? Well, I sold one house, but so I'm still, we still have four mortgages, so we still have about $240,000 in debt with our four houses.

Okay. And I'm wondering what you would recommend how to go about this, like what plan of action should we take? So you've got your primary home. Does that have a mortgage on it? Yes. I owe $80,000 on our primary home. Okay, and then you've got some rental properties. What are these? Yeah, so we have three rental properties, one owing $26,000, one owing $55,000, and one owing $81,000. Okay, and you have no other debt? No other debt. Wonderful. Okay, well, your smallest one at 26. Now, you don't really follow a debt snowball per se when it comes to mortgages, unless it just works out that way.

So generally, we would say, hey, pay off your primary first. That's where you put your head down. I want to have less risk there. But since you have 26 on one of the rentals, you could knock that one out, freeing up a payment, and then tackle the next one, and then tackle the next one. Because my guess is you pay all this off in the next two years yeah how much money do you make um like how much money are we making on the properties or personally how much what is your take-home income like what's what's on your on your tax uh your tax tax return well i'm on maternity leave right now but when I was working prior to that, I made before taxes about $225,000 and my husband was about $150,000, I think. What will you make this time next year? Will you be back to $275,000?

I'm thinking probably about $150,000. You'll be at $150,000? For me. And then he'll probably be around yeah that 120 mark or more okay so let's say you're bringing in 300,000 could you still throw 100,000 a year toward your debts like you have been yeah there we go so either way this plan is done pay you shouldn't pay what? Yeah, so you think we shouldn't sell one of them to pay off? I would. Oh, I mean, if one of them gives you a headache, sure.

But because you could pay all this off in two and a half years, if you said, we love them all, we want to keep them, we're going to knock it out in two years, we'd say, all right, fine. But if one of them, you know, choose your least favorite and sell that one, and it speeds up this whole process. And that's what, Jesse, I have had the fortune over the last four years since i started working at ramsey to actually spend time around real estate people and they're nuts in all the best ways you don't sound like a real estate person i actually do sell real estate. Oh, you do? Yeah. So you sell it?

I sell it. And I bought my first property when I was 19, and I just started buying them. So we had five, and then I just sold one. You're the first real estate person I've ever talked to that it doesn't feel like we have to pry a property from their fingers. What John is saying is you're level-headed, Jesse. Well, thank you. Maybe you're a medicated real estate person. So is there one of these that like, it's been a real burden, it's not been fun, the tenants that we've had issues,

it's not cash flowing very well. Is there one of those you go, hey, we could sell this one, use the net proceeds and start to pay all these off? Okay. And then maybe invest in something bigger is what we're hoping because um we're thinking maybe if we sell one we'll get into more of the ramsey mindset well let's pause let's knock out all of the let's let's knock out all of the debt first and then from there on out we're going to attempt to pay cash yes because think about all of those properties cash flowing with zero debt attached to them how How quickly could you stack up, along with your amazing income,

how quickly could you stack up 300,000, 400,000? Yeah. In years. And so I think we pay all these off, and then we go slow. So let me ask you this. On the house that you owe 80 on, what's the equity in that home?

What's it worth? So on our personal home, we could sell it for probably $300,000. What about the other rental home that you owe 80 on? The other one, about probably $289,000, but I would want to sell the one that we owe 55 on if I was to sell any of them. Okay. What's the equity accrued on that one? We could probably sell that one for $150,000. Okay, so you'd probably net somewhere around

$80,000. $90,000 you're selling that one? And then you could use that to sell off, you know, to pay off your primary instantly, freeing up your mortgage payment. And then almost paying off the one that you owe $26,000 on. And with giving your take-home income, you would pay that $26,000 off that month too. So if you sell the house that you owe 26 on. And given your take-home income,

you would pay that 26 off that month too. So if you sell the house that you owe 55 on, that pays for essentially, that and a little bit more of your take-home income pays for your primary residence in the 26. And then you and your husband shake hands, y'all high-five each other, and y'all go scorched earth and pay this other one off. So pretty much in one year,

you will have three paid-for houses. Three paid-for properties. One of those one you live in. That's a great feeling and a lot of cash flow on top of your incomes going up in the future. So that's where I tell you, pay cash in the future, reduce your risk, increase your peace, go slow. You're doing amazing. Awesome. Well, thank you so much. Absolutely. You got it. You got it. You got it. All right, George. God bless Canada. I was doing amazing. Awesome. Well, thank you so much. Absolutely. You got it.

You got it. You got it. All right, George. God bless Canada. I was wrong on that one. Why were you wrong? She just didn't sound like a real estate person. That is fair.

Usually they're a little bit more, they're defensive and starry-eyed about why they should keep everything and get more. And get more. And she was saying, I want to reduce. She asked the question, should I sell one? I just have never heard a real estate person. Real estate people never want to let. She asked the question, should I sell one? I just have never heard a real estate people never want to let go. No. I've heard Dave talk about selling two or three of his children before he would sell his homes. He does love his real estate. Yeah, he does. Hey, 888-825-5225.

This is the Ramsey Show. Money, work, relationships, your mental and emotional health. We're taking calls. Give us a shout. We'll be right back. This is the Ramsey Show, 888-825-5225. I'm John Deloney, joined by George Campbell. Don't forget, go to ramsaysolutions.com slash cruise. Let's sell it out today. Let's sell out today. Put your $600 deposit down, ramsaysolutions.com slash cruise. Let's go out to Wilmington, Delaware and talk to Chloe. Hey, Chloe, what's going on? Hi, how are you today? I'm good. And you? I'm doing well. Awesome. What's up? So I am on baby step two. I have about $17,000 in federal student loans. This is the last of my debt that I have to pay off. And in October, I'll be. I would have to apply each year. Um, and in exchange, I'd have to agree to stay there for three additional years. Um, so my question is, do I just, um, stay at my job and go through this program and potentially have the loan paid off in maybe two years? Um, or do I attack this debt the same way I attacked my other debt?

What do you make? $85,000 a year before tax. So you could knock this out. Let's just play out two scenarios. One is you knock it out on your own and you're done with this within what? I'm going to give it eight months. You could pay this off, make an 85 with that being your only debt. Definitely, yeah. Now, here's the upside of that. You are free to move about the country. If you find a better job, if you've got a toxic boss, if things go down at work, you can just leave. Or here's the upside.

You basically get a $10,000 raise temporarily, but you're on the hook to basically stay there the next five years right that part scares me i don't know there's enough reward here for the risk involved to have the golden handcuffs that's one man's take george as george just said that i i puckered up like what's three years of your freedom worth? Right. So I'm not saying it's a terrible deal. That's not rhetorical. You tell me. Like what do you think? If you love this job and you never want to leave and it's all good and great and wonderful and grand, maybe that's a risk worth taking.

Honestly, yeah. I don't have a desire to leave right now. I could see myself here for a long time. I'm feeling pretty comfortable with everything. And what if you get a headhunter who goes, oh, my gosh, Chloe's amazing. We'll pay you $125,000 a year. And you go, I can't leave. Or your new boss goes, hey, a headhunter just called.

They're going to pay me $250,000. I'm out. Here's the new boss, Dan. And Dan eats a lot of cheetos and he has braces and he's 44 and he's gross and that's your new boss right right so who knows i i guess this this i've learned the hard way over the years that the one thing i won't sell is time. Okay. Well, that's what's in perspective. So like when I took this job,

if I quit today, I can't go start another show, right? For X number of years, right? I signed that. I signed a non-compete here. But that is to not do this particular thing. It doesn't lock me into staying here. See what I'm saying?

Right. Yeah, I see what you mean. That's a gamble you take. How much have you paid off? About $5,000 in credit card debt and then another $6,000 in private student loans. Great. How long did that take?

I own my car. How long did it take? That took about six months. I got really serious in January. Okay, so my math was right. Eight months, folks, intensity, probably closer to seven. Now that you're going to get aggressive, you could just knock this out and be free. Yeah, I think that makes sense.

Chloe, dude, it just feels gangster. It just feels baller, dude. I just don't think it counts. Eight months and it's mine. And you don't owe three years of my life. If it was like they're going to forgive a hundred grand and I need to stay there a year, I'd probably be like, all right, I can stick out with the rating. Yeah, no matter what, do that.

So I don't want to villainize this. It's a nice benefit, but I just don't think the juice is worth the squeeze on this one. Okay. Yeah, thank you. I appreciate that. That definitely gives me a different perspective on it. Excellent, excellent. That's what we're here for.

And George, I'm trying to play this out. So if I owed $50,000, nope, because that would be three years for every 10 grand. They're paying off 10K a year. Yeah, yeah. And each 10K owes you three years. That's a lot. I don't know if it accumulates. I'm guessing you just have to stay three years beyond whatever they forgave.

Yeah, it's a $3,300 raise a year. But I don't know. I just feel like I can go make 10K with a side hustle and not have to be tied down. I was just thinking I can make $33 a year, right, because that's what the payout is. It's a $3,300 a year raise over three years. That's basically what that is. And I would go, you can Uber that. It's not really a gift.

It's kind of like a loan with strings attached. And if you follow our thing, then you don't have to worry about it. Yeah. So I don't know. There's just too many. I don't like all the rules and restrictions here. No thank you. Rules and restrictions apply.

Let's go out to Philadelphia where I was born and raised on the playground. I spent most of my days. Let's talk to Tom. What's up, Tom? Hey, John and George. Thanks for taking my call. You got it. What's up, brother? So I'm looking for some guidance. I'm 33, married. We have two kids, and hopefully we'll have another in the springtime of next year.

We're currently in baby steps four, five, six, and seven. Now, the one thing is with the house we're in, we will be looking to upgrade sometime in the near future. So I'm just wondering, would it be best given our situation to kind of just start stacking cash right now in preparation of eventually selling this house and buying a new one? Or should I continue to just do the 15% investing, pay down the mortgage until that time comes. Well, Tom, the good news is paying off your mortgage is stacking up cash. It's a forced savings plan. And so here's what I did. We paid off our home and then we rolled all of that equity, 100% equity into that next home purchase. And so that's what you're going to be able to do while investing 15%. So you're not unplugging all the future growth that's going to build you a nice

sweet nest egg for those kids one day. And so I would keep with the baby steps. There's no reason to pause right now and stack up cash in your phase of life. Okay. Why don't you just buy the house now? Well, we've been trying. So it's crazy here, the housing market. We've found a few homes that we love. The one thing is we don't want to rush, right? Because the home we're in has everything we need, but we would want, you know, a little bit bigger of a yard, some more room for the kids and what have you. And the few that have checked all of our boxes, basically just, we got outbidded on. We weren't willing to go as high as others were and we're comfortable with that, but that's kind of why we're just in the waiting game, waiting for the perfect home to come along that, you know, we're willing to maybe

to just throw out all the stops for. Oh, it makes sense. That's wise. Are you working with a real estate agent right now? We are. Yeah. We have a great real estate agent up here. She's, she's been a saint, very patient with us as we, you know, look for dozens of homes at a time and just say, no, not quite right. Yeah. That's the game. But you guys are doing the right thing. Unless there's some crazy issue, an emergency where you have to pause and stack up cash, then I would just keep on. You got the emergency fund, you know your health insurance, you know you're out of pocket max, not your first rodeo with kids. And so just keep on the baby steps, man. Awesome. All right, guys. Well, I really appreciate the time. Thanks for everything you're doing. You got it, my brother. George, I have been guilty over time of planning for things

in the future that may or may not happen. Having another kid, getting another job, getting another raise, whatever. The Astros finally trading for somebody that they could win. it's not like i guess i start dreaming in the present i start looking in the present and in a strange way it robs me of just joy and it helps me it it encourages me not to sit in and be a part of the life that i'm living right now that makes sense absolutely i relate one of the challenges, I think, when he was talking about, I hear that we hear this all the time. It's about the money part.

I just feel like I can get one step closer to this imaginary future if I just have a bunch of cash versus let's just keep doing the next right thing and the next right thing. And if you need to buy a house, then we'll sell yours. That's fine.

But it feels like there's a sense of freedom. I'm just going to put that money in the account. And what has happened in my life is this dream I had doesn't work out. I haven't paid my house down, and I've spent this money on, well, then the car breaks or somebody's got a great idea. I got ripped off on a boat I bought off Craigslist, right? It just kind of goes away. And that's why I like to force the discipline. Get that money out of here.

I don't want to see it. Put it in the house. Put it in the 401k. Don't allow me to touch it because I'm human. Because even the best of us, it gets us. I will screw this up. 888-825-5225. That's George talking about his dating life.

He will screw this up. We'll be right back. Welcome back to the Ramsey Show. 888-825-5-2-2-5. We've got Will Rutter filling in on the, I don't know, he turns all the knobs over there. And he is the world's greatest Smashing Pumpkins fan. Obsessive. Can't stop listening to them um he thinks billy corgan is the greatest singer that's ever lived and so he isn't counseling he's working through it but that's his thing hey listen um if you're like me

you're like george you're like our families you look around and we're in an election season there's all these concerns about the future, all these concerns about politics, about policies, about the national debt, all these frustrating, scary things. And the temptation is to always point your finger and say, this guy will help us or this guy's going to ruin it or she's going to save us or this guy. And what we've said at

Ramsey for 30 years, what we'll continue to say is spend your energy on things you can control and spend your energy on things in your home. And it's frustrating when you are working really hard to pay off debt and you're looking around and you know your neighbors don't make enough money to pay cash for those cars they just pulled up in and the renovations that are happening. And you're worried about what happens to all of us when people default, when they get scared about their economy and all that. And you also don't want to go knock on their door and be like, hey, you ever hear of Dave Ramsey? You don't do that. You know, we get that. One way you can help out your neighbors, your community, you can help out this country is something as simple and as no cost as liking or subscribing the show. Just hit the

subscribe button, the like button, leave a five-star review. It kicks it up into the algorithms of your neighbors, of your friends, some of you have your families, and it just begins to populate their feeds with positive information, a new way to think about money, a new way to think about taking control of the family inside your home and stopping all of this finger pointing and yelling and screaming at people who live on the East Coast or the West Coast or wherever else. Taking back control of your home, your neighborhoods, that can be as simple as hitting the subscribe button. So it means the world to us, but more importantly, it means the world to your neighbors and to your friends.

So thank you for helping everyone out by hitting subscribe, like, five star reviews, the whole shebang. Wow, that was inspiring, John. I feel like it's my civic duty now to hit the subscribe button. That's where we are. It's an American right that I get to have.

It used to be, I'm going to put a sign in my yard or it used to be, I'm going to go knock on doors. Now it's as simple as, hey, will you hit subscribe and everyone in your in your geo location will begin to get this feed a little bit more and uh it will begin to encourage people to say hey you know you don't have you don't have to have that car you don't have to have that much uh angst in your home you don't have to have that kind of debt and that means you don't have to have that kind of ah going on all the time right and it can just lower the temperature in the whole country. That's what we need.

There you go. Let's go out to San Diego, California and talk to Sarah with an H. What's up, Sarah? Hi. I want to take a quick moment before I ask my question to just say thank you to the whole Ramsey team. My mom took Financial Peace University in the 90s, and I took it 17 years ago. We're both multimillionaires now, and you guys have truly changed our family tree.

So I just wanted to say thank you. That's amazing. Thank you for sharing, Sarah. Can I push back on one thing you said? Yes. We didn't do anything. Especially John and I. Yeah, yeah.

George wasn't born yet when Dave started. But we run our mouth on the radio. You and your mom are the ones that day in, day out, week in and week out, put money away, George wasn't born yet when Dave started, but we run our mouth on the radio. You and your mom are the ones that day in, day out, week in and week out, put money away, didn't borrow money, lived a different kind of life so that you can have this moment right now. So hear us say, we accept your gratitude, but we want you to hear us say we're proud of you. It's awesome. Thank you. So what's up?

So I have a 13-year-old daughter, and five years ago there was an accident and she got third degree burns. She received $185,000, which she'll be able to access when she's 18. I've never told her about the money and I'm wondering when I should. Do I wait till she's 18? Do I tell her now? How do I prepare her for this And what can I do to help her spend the money wisely? Yeah, that's a great question. 13 is pretty young. And I have a 14-year-old and I've got an eight-year-old and I've spent my career working with college kids. I would wait until we get much closer. And the conversation around that money, I would have it as directed as possible. Meaning I would really dig into the, where do we want to go to college? How are we going to pay for housing? What do we want to do when we get there?

And then we can begin to have that conversation with some direction, not just, hey, there's going to be a big pot of money that deposits in your account. But I think beginning to set up that conversation at 16, at 17, at 18, and I would get more specific around the 17, 18 years about how much money is actually there. Or maybe say things like, there's enough money to pay for your entire undergraduate education. There's enough money to get you a car that can go to and from college that can pay your college off and they can put a down payment on your first home when you get out or whatever the deal is. But $13,000 is too much. It's a big number.

And then you get into $16,000 and $17,000. You get the, that's mine. When do I get mine? I want this. And versus a very directed, here's what this money is probably going to be best used for. I like that. Do you see any sense where you're, I mean, 13, who knows? There's a fabulous, I think it's a Mark Twain quote that says,

when I was 14, my dad was the dumbest guy in the world. And when I came home at 21, I was stunned at how much my dad had learned in seven years, right? So entering into 14, 15, 16, that's, that's just the wild west. Right. But do you have any sense now that your child, you're raising a young daughter and I can't imagine you are, you're raising a daughter that's going to be bananas with money. Are you already teaching her the principles on how to live and how to give and how to save? So I've been teaching her the principles. We started with Dave Jr. many, many years ago, but of my three children, she's definitely my impulsive spender. Can't save a

penny of the three. So, yeah, I think, I think continue to instill those lessons, letting her practice along the way and letting her be a part of tips, letting her be a part of saving, letting her practice along the way and letting her be a part of tips, letting her be a part of saving, letting her be a part of him. I'm going to buy that. And you saying I'll buy half of it, but you're going to save for it and letting her feel what the frustration of holding off on a purchase and then the excitement about buying. And then also the frustration that money's gone now, let her practice maybe a little bit more. You would let another kid, cause she's going to get the keys to a giant truck when she turns 18. Yeah. Do you lose all custodianship of that money when she turns 18? Yes. I had the option to put it in some sort of like annuity type plan. And I didn't want to do that because

I was worried she would sell it for 40% or whatever kind of scam you can get roped into. So I went for the full sum, but I am terrified that she might make bad choices with it. Yeah. You're a good parent. We all are. You got five years and a lot of growth and maturity to do exactly what your mom did with you and go, here's a wise way to handle money. Here's the way that's caused us to build wealth and have more peace in our house. And here's what it's going to take for you to follow in those footsteps. And, you know, if she learns that money comes from work and she learned the dignity of earning as she gets her first job and saves up for that thing, you know, then money

will just make her more of whatever she is. And the goal for every parent, of course, is I want my kid to be generous and wise and diligent with the money and not wasteful and impulsive. And I think over time, every 13-year-old's impulsive. It's rare to meet the ones that are like, I've been saving since I was eight. Like, I even wasn't like that. And I'm the biggest nerd out there. Every 18-year-old is impulsive too. And 21-year-olds are impulsive.

My friends with full sleeve tattoos tell their kids, not until you're 25, because you're going to think something's really cool when you're 24 and that band is not that cool right so similar here um you know it'd be a fun exercise for you guys to do i think um something i started with my son a while ago and i know it's hard if you've got multiple kids because it can just spread you pretty thin but my son and i started going to breakfast every week, once a week. And my daughter's included in this now. So I sometimes have to alternate weeks, but I'm spending some one-on-one time with each kid. I think it would be fun for you to begin scenarios five years out. All right. So here's scenario for this breakfast this morning. What would you do if you got $500? And in a weird way, you're attaching connection to mom, love and compassion to mom, time alone with mom, which is the most precious currency a parent and

a child has with some actual learning lessons, right? And those lessons can get more vivid and more real. When your daughter turns 17, what would happen if money fell from the sky and said they're going to pay for your entire college? Wow. Like what would you do? How would you spend it? And then at some point, you're going to say, here's a whole bunch of money. John, here's a fun fact. From 18 to 60, if you just park that money, 185 grand turns into $12 million. You didn't add a penny. That's mind blowing. That might change your mind about what to do with this money. That's also Greek to an 18-year-old. We'll be you next time.