The Ramsey Show - App - Don’t Fall Into the American Nightmare of Debt (Hour 2)

Episode Date: December 14, 2023

Девочка-пай Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, this is The Ramsey Show. It's where we help you, America, win in your life, specifically your money, your work, and your relationships. All three of those are tied so closely together. If you're not winning in one, you're probably losing in a few, if not all. And so we want to help you. I'm Ken Coleman. Jade Warshaw joins me.

She's our money expert. I am your expert in work today. So we'll take any and all of those questions. 888-825-5225 is the number. 888-825-5225. We start this hour with Jason in Salt Lake City, Utah. Jason, how can we help? Hey, Ken. My question is mostly for you. It's what you would do in my shoes. I currently am renting, and I can afford a house and or a condo in cash, or a condo in cash, but I am enjoying my rent where I live. I love the place

I live, and I don't necessarily want to buy a house or condo yet. I'm wondering what you would do if you were in my shoes. I would do exactly what you're doing. With the evidence you've given me so far, if you enjoy where you're living and financially you sound like you're in really good shape, how much cash do you have? I have about 550. Are you single? I am. Yeah. How old?

27. And what do you love so much about renting this particular place? Like, give me more on that yeah I got a great view and it's nice that I don't really have to worry about anything you know it's all after after payment rent no maintenance or anything like that and I'm concerned though you know I don't obviously I want to get married and have kids and whatever but I know once if and when I buy a house that may change when I'm married. So I was thinking the condo route, and you get the HOA fees and all of that.

No, you don't want a condo. When you get the wife and the kiddos, the condo, that's not the ideal situation, especially where you are. How much do you make, and how much are you saving, and then how much are you investing? Give me the answer to those three questions. Yes, I make 120. Um, I max out all my other, uh, my 401k and HSA and all those, uh, I think I can put in 30% and then I, uh, and then I invest the rest into my brokerage account. So the 550 that you have, is that in the brokerage or is that across everything?

Yeah, that's, that's in the brokerage or is that across everything? Yeah, that's in the brokerage. Very good. How did you save that up so fast? How long did it take you? Some of that is from my parents. And then I would say hit the DNA lottery. So I've definitely, you know, they paid for my school. And I've definitely worked hard as well, but I haven't had any debt or anything like that. Good.

You know what? Because he's investing so much. I mean, he's solid. Yeah, listen, don't feel the itch. I would not feel the itch if I were you to buy at this stage of your life. You're going to buy. And I think that when your family situation changes and all that, I'd keep stacking cash because you're going to be able to pay for whatever you want cash. I may feel contrary to that, Ken.

Well, of course you do. I may feel a little contrary. If I say ying, you say yang, but I'm fine with that. I just don't know why he has to. He likes where he lives. He likes the view. He's in great financial shape. He's not married yet. Why should he buy a house? Well, I don't think you should feel rushed. Don't get me wrong. I don't think you should feel rushed, but my questions would be, okay, like how long have you been renting for the last seven years? For the last, how long have you been renting and living on your own? Yeah, on my own about four, I guess four or five years. And I've been renting. Yeah, but I had roommates. This is the first almost coming up on a year where I've been on my own and I have not had roommates. Okay. So you've rented for five, six years.

What's your rent? I'm sorry? How much do you pay in rent? $1,400. I'm going to give it back to Jay. Jay disagrees with me here. I want to hear this. Well, then my next question, so I'm just gathering more facts before I really form. My next question to you is is there a significant, is there a lovely

lady in the picture is all I'm asking? There is not. No, I am single. Look it my... Look it, look it, if you know anyone. Hold on, single ladies in Salt Lake, there's your invitation. Well, here's where my mind goes to. I don't want you waiting to buy a home because I might meet a lady and we might get married. And that's probable. You probably will, but you don't know when that's going to happen. So I don't want that to be the reason that you wait to we might get married. And that's probable. You probably will, but you don't know when that's going to happen. So I don't want that to be the reason that you wait to get into home ownership.

And I also don't want the reason that you wait to get into home ownership to be because of, oh, these rates, they're so high. I'm just going to wait till rates to go down. I just want to make sure that those aren't the driving factors. Are they the driving factors? Not necessarily, no, but like, like you said, at some point I need to buy, you know, it's like, you don't want to rent forever. Yes, I agree, but that's not the scenario. I'm going to tell you, I respectfully disagree with you. He's single. He's got a great view. He's single. He's got a view, but I, I just am thinking about over time. Here's what I know about you, Jason. You are a great saver. You're great at getting after a task. And my thought is

like, listen, you buy a house, you own it in cash. You have the ability to build wealth so quickly. He's going to have this equity working for him. He's going to pick a place that he loves. He's going to pay for it in cash. It's going to build build up he's going to save more money he's the kind of guy that's going to have a giant real estate portfolio but i'm regardless whether you start in three and don't get me wrong i'm not saying he has to be rushed and buy a house tomorrow but i'm saying listen if i were you in the next two years i'd be thinking about owning a home is all i'm saying okay then all right if i'm going to meet you in the middle on this one, I'd say it better be a smaller one so that we just call it a real investment, not the home.

Because we don't know what his situation is going to be when he gets a woman. She doesn't like his house. Well, no home is the home. Anybody who thinks this is the one, I'm going to live here forever. No, you're not. What do you recommend? I think, listen. A $300,000 house?

I would spend his money. $550,000? He's in Salt Lake City, Kim. I wouldn't money. $550,000? He's in Salt Lake City, Ken. I wouldn't spend all $550,000 on a single guy. Jason, what's it cost to get what you need in Salt Lake City, in the area that you like? To get a nicer home, I would say around $550,000, but I could get one around $300,000 to $400,000 as well. But what's a nicer home? What is that?

How many bedrooms? Oh, I would say, like, a minimum of three beds, two baths, homes. Yeah, but you're a single guy. But my point is— Exactly. That's why I don't need that. That's why— You don't need that.

And I'm not saying that he has to buy a house for his future family. I'm not saying that at all. You want him to buy a $550,000 house cash as an investment property. No, I'm saying I just want him to buy something that he can live in. I'm not saying he has to spend all his money. All I'm saying is that we know the correlation between homeownership and wealth building over time. 100%.

That's all I'm saying. I think he's going to get there. I just think in his single situation. But I thought you said spend it all. And his hair's not on fire. His hair's not on fire. But my thing is like, listen, all these markets are different. So in Salt Lake City, if you're trying to get a two-bedroom, two-bathroom condo or townhouse and it's $400, that's a reality in a lot of places.

Do you have the option to buy the apartment you're in with the great view? Unfortunately, no. I wouldn't. Listen, I've been to Salt Lake. There's a lot of views. I bet you you could get a house with a nice view, too, or buy a condo or buy a townhouse. Listen, I love ownership. And I don't disagree.

I just, because he's single and he's sitting on all that cash, I just would preach a little bit of patience right now. He's been patient for seven long years, Ken. That was my Titanic voice, by the way. I like that. I like that. I feel like I see Rose and what was the guy? Jack? Rose and Jack.

Bobbing in the cold, icy waters. Very interesting. Yeah, you're not wrong to buy a house. It would be a great move for you. But I also like the freedom. Go get the lady. Then we figure out the house. And you're stacking cash on the way.

Get after it, young man. What are you waiting on? There's a lot of fish in the sea. What are these guys waiting on these days? This is the Ramsey Show. All right, you're listening to the Ramsey Show. Ken, I had to hijack the mic from you just for a moment. It's okay.

It's in good hands. What's going on? Listen, a lot of you probably remember a couple months back, really back in the summertime, Ken, I kind of went nuts on the mic because as a country, our spending had gotten completely under control, out of control. We were looking at a trillion in credit card debt for the first time and inflation. We were still dealing with that. And I just had to let folks know, listen, inflation, we were still dealing with that. And I just had to let folks know, listen, guys, we've got to get in control of our money and quit going on this roller coaster. And it's interesting because really, I mean, over the past, I'm going

to go with three years, has been crazy. Everything from COVID and then we saw the housing market just change abruptly. I mean, it's really been a roller coaster. You're looking at inflation, you're looking at mortgage rates, just so much change. And now here we are into the holiday season yet again, and people are still spending as though nothing's wrong. They're spending like nothing's wrong. But when you really look at the stats, it's crazy. I mean, again, here we are over the summer. It was like, oh man, we hit a trillion of credit card debt. And now we're at 1.08 trillion. It's just climbing up 1.54 billion year over year. That's unheard of, unbelievable. And so now we're seeing interest rates. Obviously,

it's more and more expensive to borrow money. So interest rates on credit cards upwards of 20 percent right wow these numbers are going just they're going mad and now we're starting to see uh the results of our spending choices right we all got into houses in 2021 that we couldn't afford right everybody bought cars because there's a shortage and it's too expensive to buy used. And everybody bought cars they couldn't afford with car payments, $700 a month, $664 a month, $882 a month. Maybe I called your number there. And we're finally starting to see,

okay, the dust is settling a little bit. The dust is settling. And we're hearing it with how could I possibly afford to buy a house? It's the interest rates. And we're blaming the interest rates as though it it's 1984 right and it's not it's 2023 if it was really bad we'd be seeing 18 and 16 and 17 percent but we're we're losing we're losing our marbles over you know this three percent increase or four percent increase and I'm like is that

really the problem our mortgage rates really the issue? Or is it the pattern that we've created with how we're borrowing money and living on more than we make? That's a great question. And it comes top down. If you look at what Congress is doing, both sides of the aisle, both parties are equally guilty. That's right. The American debt, our country's debt. It's kind of the entire attitude about debt from our leadership down is just, well, we'll figure it out. We'll figure it out. Look at this. Look what they threw on the screen right here. That'll make you break out in hives. Yeah, that is making me break out in hives. If you're watching, you can see this if you're in our

listening audience, James and the team has thrown up literally a, this is a ticker board. I don't know what else to call it, but it is a running total of our national debt. Oh, that's painful. And that's 33 trillion, $915 billion. And it's going up. We're just watching it rise. It's crazy. Oh, wow. That look, some of us need to do that same exercise with our bank account and look at it. Look at, is your savings going down or is it going up? Is your investment going down? Do you even have anything? Or you do what I'm saying? You need to take a look at how you're spending your money. Because like I said, we're seeing these numbers coming in. More and more people are defaulting on their car payments. More and more people are taking 401k loans,

whether it be for hardship or for other things. And the average that they're taking out is $5,000. $5,000 that they're robbing from their future self to pay for what? We don't know. Have we begun to see any pain points in the data? Have you seen anything on the reemergence of student loans? They just started back in October. So we're still relatively, we're inside of three months right here. Listen, that's another part to this. And, you know, we knew that it was an issue because after student loans came back on the scene, it's like, listen, people are already drowning, right? They're already underwater as it is. And so, of course, Biden administration rolls out that 12 month on-ramp period where they said, listen, if you're not ready to pay your student loan, you don't have to right now. We'll give you 12 months. We're going

to continue to add interest, but you won't be penalized if you won't pay it. And I'm like, listen, you are being penalized. That's interest rising. Okay. But the point here is something has got to give. Something has got to change in your life because the numbers don't lie. The math is mathing, whether you like it or not. We're looking at this and we're going, OK, you're deeply in debt. You're piling it up and you haven't changed your ways. And just recently, Ken, the other day I did a media response and they said, Jade, what do you think about doomsday spending? And I said, well, what is that?

And they said, it's people looking at the current economic situation and going, that really sucks. I'm tired of dealing with it. I'm tired of looking at it. I'm just going to live my life. So it's basically another version of like YOLO spending or revenge spending. Oh, okay. I thought this was the preppers. This is different. No, this is different. This is people looking and going, I'm just tired of the roller coaster. I'm tired of having to cut back because of inflation. I'm tired of having. So I'm just going to forget it.

You know, double make hair. I'm just to spend my money. And I'm like, really? That's the response. Like you run in that you you're going to keep running into the fire. It's consuming you. It's consuming your future. It's consuming your bank account.

You can't even pay for your kids college and you're just going to keep spending. That is not the solution. No, it's not. Here's what I think. I think it's the beginning. We're about to come into a new year, 2024. And I think that you have a decision to make. And that decision is you can either continue to bury your head in the sand and go, this sucks. I don't like it, but I'm going to keep doing my thing. I'm going to keep spending for Christmas. I'm going to keep getting new car loans. I'm going to keep living my life because, quote, I deserve it. Or you're going to go, you know what? I don't have any money. I argue with my spouse about money every single day. Yesterday, I yelled at my daughter for asking for lunch money. Gas is a struggle. Groceries are a struggle. I never go on vacation without putting it on my credit in your life, you're going to make a plan and you're going to stick to it. Luckily, we're here to help you with that. And in the new year, we're going to have so much.

Listen, I talk about every dollar all the time. I talk about Financial Peace University. In the new year, this is your chance because I know who I'm talking about. I'm talking to the people who circle around the Ramsey network, right? Y'all circle around, you watch the show, you come to events here and there, but you've never actually done the thing. You've never actually gotten on the plan, stuck to it, gotten on a budget, stuck to your budget. This is your chance. Are you going to keep taking out credit card debt? This is your chance to cut the credit card up once and for all and be done with it. This is your choice. This is your wake-up call. What we're looking at, it's a nightmare. It's not a dream. Being in debt, not living paycheck to paycheck, 67% of Americans

are living paycheck to paycheck, but they're not ready to do anything about it yet. You can make that choice. That's all I'm saying, Ken. People have a choice to make. Well, and I think you make a very compelling case that this is an issue, whether it be money, your weight, substance issues, relationship issues, in a job you can't stand. We as humans would rather be miserable than uncomfortable. Yeah, that's right. And what you've presented here

is an unbelievably overwhelming case that people would rather be miserable financially than uncomfortable, meaning making the sacrifices, living on a budget, not buying a brand new car. That's uncomfortable to do things differently than you're doing now, but you're miserable. And if you can understand that, I think the case that Jade is making here is you're okay being miserable. And until you get to the point where you go, I don't want to be miserable with money anymore. I'd rather do some things that are very uncomfortable to not be miserable. And you and Sam did that. You embraced the amount of money you paid off, almost half a million dollars. You were uncomfortable. You have to hit that moment. The stuff's got to hit the fan in your life to where you go, this is embarrassing.

This is embarrassing. I remember my sister went into the hospital and I couldn't go see her because we didn't have the gas money. And she was just three hours up the road, Ken. That's miserable. That was embarrassing. And some of you guys need to get embarrassed about what's going on with your situation and go, I am a grown woman. I am a grown man.

I need to stop living like this. Think about the last thing that you needed to do and you couldn't do it because you couldn't scrounge up $26. That'll move you to change. Wow. All right. We're here to help you change. Quick break.

Don't move. More of your calls coming up. This is The Ramsey Show. Welcome back to The Ramsey Show. I'm Ken Coleman. Jade Warshaw joins me in studio. The number to jump in on the conversation, it's about your life. We'd love to hear from you. 888-825-5225. 888-825-5225. All right, let's go to Emma, who joins us in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Emma, how can we help? Hi, thank you both for the work that you guys do and taking my call. I really appreciate it. You bet. What's going on? Yeah, my question today is about my career. I recently have been promoted into a new role. I love it. My last roles within my organization have both been brand new roles. This last role, I actually helped promote and I helped facilitate the job description and what I'm actually doing for the company today.

My question is, is how do I know what I'm worth in the market outside from this niche environment and this specific organization? You mean what your salary range is outside? Correct. Yep. Well, this is not a perfect science, but you can have some good science around it. So what you have to do is, to the best of your ability, you've got to match up your job description, even though you created it custom for your current organization, which, by the way, I want to give you mad props for that. That's really awesome that you did that. That is not done very often, and I admire you. But if you could take your job description, even the language that you use, but begin to look out in the marketplace and match that up. And I think you could probably match that up. I'll try to help you a little bit. So describe, how would

you describe your current role? Yeah. So my current role is development and training in a sales department on a very basic level. That is what I do. And I know there are those roles out there. So I do believe that I could find something somewhat similar to that. Yeah. So that's what we're doing. So we're going to look at sales leadership roles, sales training roles, and you just begin to look at those job descriptions out there. And as those companies are describing their roles, how much do they match up with what you're doing? And now you're looking at your area of Milwaukee, Wisconsin. You're looking at your years of experience. You've got it. It's not apples to apples. Companies are going to look at experience and they're going to look at specific skill sets.

So if you just take the matching up of the job description, plus your experience, plus your skill set, and you can see what the marketplace looks like. And then if you wanted to go a step further, you could always reach out to a recruiting company because recruiting firms are looking for people all the time. It doesn't mean you're signing up with them, doesn't mean you're looking for a job, but you go, look, what's the market out there for me? And that's how you can get a much closer idea. Awesome. Thank you very much.

Yeah, appreciate the call. All right, let's go to Lily in Indianapolis. Lily, you're on the Ramsey Show. What's going on? Hi, Kent. Hi, thank you for answering the call. You bet. I appreciate all the advice you give to the listeners. My question is whether it's a smart decision to use cash to buy a new car, to upgrade, I guess, from my current car. So what's your current car worth and how much are you trying to upgrade? Right. Currently, my car is worth about $20,000. The new car we're looking at is close to $64,000. Oh, wow. $64,000. Okay.

What's the car? It's a Lexus SUV. Okay. Well, let's see if it makes sense. Do you guys have any debt? We don't have any debt besides a mortgage. Okay. No debt besides a mortgage.

Do you guys have three to six months of expenses saved up? Yes. We have a rainy day fund close to $70,000. Okay, excellent. We have a sort of a set aside bucket of money to work with around $48,000. Okay, so the $48,000 is separate from the $70,000? Correct. Okay, and then what do you guys earn?

What's your annual income combined? Household-wise, $300,000 a year. Okay. So we always say, you know, you don't want your vehicles to be any more than half of your annual income. So, and for all intents and purposes, you have $150,000 to work with here. So if you've got a vehicle that's $65,000 and your husband's got one that's $65,000 or $70,000, you're good. The question here is, is this a used vehicle or is it brand new? It's a brand new one. Interesting. So then my next question is, if we're talking about doing a brand new vehicle, we always talk about, we suggest not buying a brand new vehicle until you have a million dollar net worth,

because at that point you can take the hit, right? Because we know that brand new vehicles lose 60% of their value in the first three to four years, right? What's the model? I'm sorry, what's the question? What's the model of the Lexus SUV? Is it a GX? It's the MX Hybrid. MX Hybrid. All right, keep going, Jade.

I love doing research. I know you do. Because Jade's right. I want to show you the real numbers. By the way, is this a 2023 you want to get? The 65? 2024. Oh.

Yeah, they're going into 2024. And it's a Lexus MX. Yes. Okay. So, I mean, Lily, do you have a million-dollar net worth? I think so. We ran some numbers. I think we do.

My husband would say 100%. Yes, I'm always on the cautious side. What's making you feel cautious? Unpack that. Just my nature. What is it? Like he's counting money that you don't want to count? Like, what is it?

Like, I have a business which is doing well. Okay. And then I just don't know how the business will how the business will grow, uh, five, 10 years from now, right? There's the unknown. Okay. But I mean, net worth, meaning when you subtract what you owe, which is nothing, what you own minus what you owe, right? So if you look, you said, I have no debt. So you're looking at the value of your, your home, whatever your home is worth. And then you're looking at what you have invested in various investments accounts and you're looking at what cash you have now you could you could include your business if you at some point plan to sell it and

you have a valuation on that you could include that but yeah i mean that's the question because if you have a million dollar net worth i'm like and you have cash to buy a brand new car i'm not going to be the one to stop you i'm going to congratulate you and clap you up but if you don't i did some homework miss jade all right ken ken is going to tell us the i'm a teacher's aide for this segment yes ken coleman go for it so uh jade is absolutely right lily i just went this is nashville but i would guess that that indianapolis maybe even a little bit cheaper uh but but but. All right, here's what I've got. I've got a used 2022, the NX, 19,000 miles for $41,900. Whoa!

I got a – That's $23,000 difference. Yeah, I'm going to do better. I got a used 2022, same model uh 21 000 miles only 2 000 miles difference 37 9 oh i'm just saying 19 000 miles is is new that's a new car and here's what we're saying lily we just want your money to go further like this isn't gonna break you but paying 65 000 for this model for a 2024 you realize you're getting ripped off because these cars, this is a two-year-old car, not even two-year-old car I'm giving you right here. That's right. And you're

saving a lot of money. So I like the $41,000 price point. But I don't want her to feel bad if she has, of course, if she's got the million dollar net worth, I want her to inhale that new car smell until her eyeballs roll in the back of her head. know what i'm saying like i want her to enjoy that moment if you've got that million dollar net worth because then you can take the hit and you know it is what it is me i feel like i'm getting ripped off i'm getting gamed well you are you you're agreeing to take the hit you're right yeah you're gonna pay like someone else to take the hit yeah i see and here's here's the thing. With these two cars here, Lily, someone else has paid the stupid tax. I'm just trying to make my case here. And listen, it doesn't matter if I'm right.

I'm just saving you money. You can't hate me, Lily. So, Lily, let's go back to the core. I'm a man of the people. Let's go back to the core question because my screen says, is it smart for me to buy a $65,000 car or should I invest some of that money? As long as you are investing 15% of your income every single month, as long as you have a million dollar net worth, and as long as you can pay cash for that brand new car. For me, the answer is yes.

For that reason, I'm in. You can do it. You're a big girl, Lily. We believe in you. But if one of those things doesn't check the box, then we have to adjust. And if you don't want to pay a stupid tax, go Ken's route. I like it, Ken. That's good.

Got to get the last word in there. I can't help myself. Really good stuff. Hey, Lily, you're awesome. You're doing great. Enjoy whatever car you're going to get. This is The Ramsey Show. The Ramsey Show continues.

Thrilled to have you with us. We're here to help you win with your money and your work. Today, I'm Ken Coleman. Jade Warshaw joins me at, oh, it is the season. Tis the season, Jade. And, you know, Christmas around here is always really fun as we get to do some great things for you fine folks, part of our audience. So we've got two things.

One, it's not too late to get involved in the Ramsey Christmas Cash Giveaway. If you don't know what this is, one of our weekly prizes each week is $500, and then you're entered to win the grand prize of $5,000. So you can enter every day for your chance of winning at ramsaysolutions.com slash giveaway. And while you're on the website, over in the store, we've got our $12 sale, the Christmas special, all of our best-selling books, just $12 each. And there's a meaningful gift for just about anybody on your list. So that's ramsaysolutions.com slash store, ramsaysolutions.com slash store, ramsaysolutions.com slash giveaway. Make sure that you are signing up for a chance to win 500 bucks and maybe even

$5,000. So get to the website. I don't know what you're waiting on. All right, let's go to Fayetteville, Arkansas next. Elizabeth joins us there. Elizabeth, how can we help? Hey, thank you for having me on. You bet. What's up? So I'm not sure what I should do. There's kind of two sides to what's going on, I guess. So do you want to hear the marital side part or the financial side part first? Let's hear the marital side part first. Okay. Okay. So I'm going to start kind of back to a year ago. So I left my ex-husband, which was financially abusive, and I got out. And since then, it's been kind of the—I've been—keep getting thrown back down, I guess, is what it would be.

Do you mind telling us briefly what financially abusive means? Yeah, I had a budget of $50 a week for groceries for my family, and that's the only access of money I had. Wow. So it totally controlled you. Totally controlling. Wow. What was you guys' income?

He made about $70,000 a year. Wow. I read Dave Ramsey's books about four years ago and I got so pumped and I brought it up to him and he just despised Dave and it kind of shut me down a lot and he wouldn't let me in on anything like I even wrote out like a strategy for him like hey like if we do this and this this is what we're going to be projecting right getting out of debt. Because at the moment, we had, I think, a car debt and a couple other things, credit cards probably. Eventually, we did get out of it, luckily. But now I'm back in debt.

Tell us what's happening. You said you keep going down. So give us a picture of what's going on with you right now, the finances. So I scored a job right after I left him in December. And I started in January of last year. And I was there until about April. And between then and like April, my idea was I have six months. I'm going to save up enough for a retainer for a lawyer and I guess um do it myself like file and everything on my own for cash but he beat me to it about 30 days

later I got served and I had to take out a credit card for a retainer because I had zero money and I had I got a an apartment within like I don't know January 10th is when I got my apartment okay and I pretty much got everything set up on my own by myself and I don't know how I did it but I did it and it's just been back and forth I got let go I was pregnant at the time when I did leave so I was about yeah I was about 13 weeks pregnant, I think, if I can remember correctly. Uh-huh. And I got let go in April for budget cuts, I guess. So how are you living now?

How are you making ends meet? You've got the baby now. You've got your place. How are you covering the bills? Yeah. I have child support, but it's really like iffy. It's not set amount. And I have that.

And then. How much is that? I was able, it was supposed to be 700 a month. But it's not, you can't count on it yet is what you're saying. Not quite. Because I look back and some months I had like 400 and some months I had 600. Okay, so he's not consistent with that. What are you bringing in every month? Well, after I had the baby, I got on a contract gig for about 200 a week.

And I paired that and the 200. And then at the time... So $800 for you? Yes. At the time, I had a boyfriend, and when I got let go, I told him, I was like, I don't know what to do. I can't. I can't. Like, I'm not going to be able to... So you were needing him to help you support. You were needing the boyfriend to help support, obviously, because you were bringing in $800. Okay. What kind of work do you do? job after I got let go of that one, the contract ran out and I found another one at an agency, but it's only for 60 days and it's going up at the end of this month. Okay. And I have an option to become an employee depending on how I do. Okay. That makes sense. I'm going to let Ken

get to you with the, with the career stuff, because I, I, I need you to be doing more. That's earning you five times more money. And I know that you can do that. He's going to help you get there. Before I set him up, do you, what I want you to see is you can't, two people can't live off of $800 a month. And even if you're, even if the child support becomes consistent, you can't live off of $1,300 a or fifteen hundred dollars a month okay so the income actually getting about twelve hundred with this new job okay but you still need

more because that's two thousand dollars a month and two thousand dollars a month is twenty four thousand dollars a year yes so do we see so a, I have to drop the bomb on this one. Okay. After the, everything got finalized, I kind of, my ex came up to me and I don't know what his intention was, but essentially he knew that my boyfriend was living with me and he told me I'm basically in contempt and I have to figure out what to do or he'll file for contempt and so what's the contempt um I'm basically cohabitating with another male while you have the baby and my six-year-old yes well yeah okay yes he can do that because if the if the tables look i'm not trying to be harsh but if the tables were turned you'd be feeling the same way so what i want for let me let me paint

a picture of what i want for you and i'm just going to be blunt i want a situation where you're not dependent on a man period because right now do you understand because they can come and go and you're bringing these guys you don't want to be bringing these guys into your kids life in and out right and you have you're fresh off of a divorce and it's almost like i'm just telling you what it sounds like from my seat it almost sounds like you just rushed into another relationship because you needed stability you your stability doesn't come from them okay You need to go out and create the stability in your own life and you need to get your community rallied around you, good friends, family. If you're not connected in a local church, I don't care what you believe in. Get connected in a local

church because those people are not going to care what you believe. They're going to rally around you. They're going to love you. You're going to be a good friend to them. They're going to be a good friend to you. You need people, not just boyfriends. Does that make sense? Yeah, but my lawyer told me to, so the judge is known for revoking children for reasons. My lawyer told me to either move him out or marry him yes we had to do that so did you get married yeah we did but we were planning on it um anyways and i talked to my therapist about it too okay so now you're married i voted out for him yes okay so now you're married so the contempt thing okay doesn't matter you told it to me like it matters it don't matter

anymore all right come on ken it doesn't know yeah doesn't now. Okay. We got a lot going on here, James. And we're running out of time. I rarely do this. We usually don't hold over for the hour, but we want to get her a financial coach. So hang on the line. You need a financial coach, but listen to me. Now that you're married to this guy, which would have been nice to know five minutes ago. Okay. He has got to be working 50, 60 hours a week. You have got to get some help with the babies and you're working 40 hours a week. This is an income issue and you've got to get more of it and you've got to keep more of it. We're going to get you a financial coach. It's our gift to you to help you get a budget and get set up.

You better go get some work. Fast. Both of you. This is the Ramsey Show.