The Ramsey Show - App - Handling Messy Money Situations (Hour 1)

Episode Date: May 16, 2023

Dave Ramsey & Rachel Cruze answer your questions and discuss: "We called off our engagement. How do I handle the bills?"  Working the Baby Steps after getting laid off, from the blog: What to Do if You’re Laid Off, "What should my fiancé and I do with our homes when we get married?" Pausing investing while saving or a house, How long to stay at a company with bad leadership. Have a question for the show? Call 888-825-5225 Weekdays from 2-5pm ET Join a Personality-led FPU class. Click here! Enter The Ramsey Cash Giveaway for a chance at $3,000! https://bit.ly/TRSgvwy Shop our bestsellers during the $10 Sale! https://bit.ly/TRS10Sale Want a plan for your money? Find out where to start: https://bit.ly/3cEP4n6 Listen to all The Ramsey Network podcasts: https://bit.ly/3GxiXm6 Interested in advertising on The Ramsey Show? https://ter.li/s64ye3 Learn more about your ad choices. https://www.megaphone.fm/adchoices Ramsey Solutions Privacy Policy

Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the pods moving and storage studios, it's the Ramsey Show, where we help people build wealth, do work that they love, and create actual amazing relationships. Rachel Cruz, number one best-selling author, Ramsey Personality, host of the Rachel Cruz Show, co-host of the Smart Money Happy Hour. My daughter is my co-host today. Open phones at 888-825-5225.

That's 888-825-5225. Chase starts this hour in Seattle. Hi, Chase. Welcome to the ramsey show hey dave thank you for taking my call sure what's up uh just a quick question for you today uh i recently got out of an engagement and i'm trying to figure out how to handle the budget after the fact wow i'm sorry that's a that's a big decision. Yeah, it's been really hard. I think it's one of the hardest things I've ever done, but will be one of the best things that I've ever done at the same time.

What happened? Before we get into money, my biggest thing is I just want to make sure I do the right thing. I was just having doubts, Dave, and I shouldn't have doubts about the woman that I want to marry. And so I don't think that was fair to her, and I don't think it was fair to me either. And things ended great. You know, it was a very mature decision on both our parts.

Wow. And now, you know, now we're trying to handle the budget. And so I'm trying to figure out how to do that and how to do this the right way and find that closure and, you know, just do the right thing. Give us the details. What are the bills outstanding that need to be covered, and who thinks they ought to cover what? Yeah, so that's where it gets interesting.

So the bills paid just for the wedding so far, it totals $5,360. And when I reached out to them to try to figure out, hey, how do we handle this, they said, okay, well, the dress that we purchased is nonrefundable, and we're going to keep that. So we'll subtract that from the total of $5,360. Who is they? That would be her and her parents. Oh, okay.

Yep. Okay, so the bills already paid are $5,300. Yes, that's correct. Who paid those? Who paid those? Her,300. Yes. Who paid those? Who paid those? Okay. All right. And the dress she said is non-refundable, so she's going to just keep it.

So how much was that? The dress was $2,000. Okay. So you have $3,300 left. Yep, exactly. And they think that it is more than reasonable that I cover the remaining $3,300 on my own. So, yeah, do I... Because you were the one that broke up.

Exactly. What do you make? I make $78,000. How much money do you have? Enough to cover it. How much money do you have? Maybe $5,000. Okay. do you have enough to cover it how much money do you have maybe five thousand bucks okay how old are you 23 years old wow what's your gut say chase what would make you feel right yeah Right. Yeah. Let's see.

I think there's two truths to this. A lot of me just wants to... No, there's only one truth, but there's two viewpoints. Yeah. Right. A lot of me just wants to pay it and be done with it, and that way they don't have anything negative that they could say about me in this situation. I don't think it's, you know, it would,

I don't think it's about the money at this point. And I think it's more of just kind of a jab at me. And, um, you know, I'm trying to pay for a master's degree right now too. So that would be tough, but at the same time, it's just money. And so, you know, if 3,300 bucks is what it takes for this to be over with and for both of us to find that closure, I think so be it. But, you know, I don't know if it's worth the time to try to negotiate and like, hey, maybe we should just split this in half, you know? Yeah. Here's the thing. I would not make the decision based on what they think or what they're going to say about you in the future.

Yes, yes. Okay. I would make the decision about what is the ethical, correct thing to do from your position. And whatever their opinion is, is just going to be their opinion. Like it or not. Okay. But you can't buy their, let me just tell you, you break up with my daughter while you're engaged. You're probably not going to give it.

You ever give me enough money to make me really love you. Think about it. Right. So, I mean, think that you're just not going to buy that right so that's okay i'm not saying you did the wrong thing but i mean just having trying to get trying to have level of controlling what they think about you through this is not is not why you would do that should not be your motivation to your point because you can't control like you could pay this and then you could hear a year later oh yeah some family friend was

like golly he chase really screwed over and i'm not you know they're all mad like they could still do that and you have paid it do you know i'm saying so like you can't control what they think or feel about you in the future sometimes also a thing that helps me with ethics is to go way out in the future and say like okay you're 23 when you're 73 and you're thinking back on this, what's going to make you feel right? I can tell you. I can tell you, by the way. Pay it.

I have no idea. I'd pay it. I'd pay it. And I would pay it, Chase, because I think there's a level of, again, it's not a right or wrong thing. And I feel like you, in your case, you made the right call for you which I think is extremely courageous to break off an engagement I'm like that's that's really hard purchase yeah I mean like you're in the middle of plan I'm like oh my gosh you even have the wherewithal to be like I'm gonna I gotta end this so it's not a knock on you chase I think you did a very courageous

decision but I also think because of that, there are these dominoes that have played out that have in a tune of $3,300. And I think there's a level of just owning it. Do you know what I mean? I'm like, yep, this was my call to do this and to end it, even though it was the right call for me. But because of that, I'm going to take care of what I need to for myself to resolve and take ownership of that decision and move forward with my life. And I think this $3,300 is a representation of you taking ownership and moving forward. And if I was in your shoes, I would write the check. And I do it for all of those reasons that Rachel said. And you will never look back and regret it. Yeah. Right. You're not doing it

out of weakness. You're not doing it out of weakness you're not doing her cheating on you or like you know there was some other big dynamic to this formula then i would be like girlfriend like you got it you know what i'm saying but but she's cheating on you her parents pay the bill you get she get they get nothing but that's different you're the guy broke the contract here not by cheating but i mean, you had a deal. We had a deal. There's a ring on the finger, and you decided I'm not doing that deal. And the cost of getting out of the deal is pay the bills.

So that's one reason. The other reason is I can promise you from having done stuff like this in the past, it relieves at the moment you're doing it, it's like, this sucks. I don't want to do this. But you will never look back and go, 20 years now i wish i had negotiated with those people you'll never go back and say that the 40 year old you the 60 year old you will never go back and go oh i really did i really messed that up i should have screwed them over would your uh would your viewpoint change at all if it was fifty thousand dollars that these parents have put down and all this stuff and they want him to pay?

Like, you know what I mean? Does the amount change the weight of life? It makes it harder to make the decision. And I would have to weigh in at that point. The length of time we would be in? I mean, let me just tell you, if you sign up for $50,000 worth of stuff, it wasn't him signing up for all that. That would have been like her and her mom signing up for all that. So I probably would have put some weight on that.

This is a very reasonable amount. And they're deducting the dress from it. They're trying. Yes, yes. And so you'll just have no regrets. Live a life where you have to sleep with your head on a pillow. It's that simple. This is The Ramsey Show. doctor are longer, and it's harder than ever to get anything approved through the bureaucracy.

So, if you feel like the system is working against you, try a biblically-based alternative to health insurance—Christian healthcare ministries. CHM is a health cost-sharing ministry that's helped hundreds of thousands of families like yours take care of over $11 billion in medical bills since 1981. And CHM has also helped them stay true to their values and avoid miles of red tape. And CHM support goes far beyond meeting financial needs. They'll also help meet spiritual needs. Members become part of a family who will pray with them

and for them when they experience a medical event. So listen, y'all, there's no better way to take care of health care costs. CHM programs start as low as $98 a month. So learn more today and join at chministries.org slash budget. That's chministries.org slash budget. budgets. Rachel Cruz, Ramsey personality, number one bestselling author and a co-host. If you haven't checked it out with George Campbell, smart money, happy hour is, um, one of the biggest hits on Ramsey network right now. So on the Ramsey networks, it's great podcast, a lot of fun in the afternoon. These two cut up and carry on.

George is the king of snark, and you'll like hanging out with the two of them. Smart Money Happy Hour, be sure and do that. When it comes to this show, we need your help. Would you subscribe, please? Would you follow? Push the follow button. Click it, click it, click it. And leave us a five-star review.

One-star reviews are not helpful. If you don't like the show, quit listening. But, hey, it's pretty simple. Move on. But otherwise, leave us a five-star review. One-star reviews are not helpful. If you don't like the show, quit listening. But, hey, it's pretty simple. Move on. But otherwise, leave us a five-star review. We'd love to have that. Thank you. It's a big help on the old algorithms on the Internet.

Pushes the show forward. Other people get to learn about it and all of that kind of stuff. And, of course, you can share the show. Share the link. Click the share button on however it is you're consuming it, whether it's Spotify or Apple, whatever it is. Oh, and by the way, you could share which talk radio station you're listening to. That would work, too. Or maybe you're a YouTuber.

I don't care. No, maybe I'm the YouTuber. You're the watcher on YouTube. I'm just a YouTuber now, Rachel. That's kind of like Deloney. I'm down to that now. Open phones here, 888-825-5225. Jonathan's in Washington, D.C. Hey, Jonathan,

how are you? Hi, sir. Thank you so much for taking my call. Rachel, it's a pleasure to speak with you. Thank you, Jonathan. How can we help? Yeah, so I'm in a bit of a predicament. In January, I moved my family up from central Virginia to the southern Maryland outside of DC for a fantastic job that God just kind of seemed to fall into my laps. And then two weeks ago, I was laid off. So we went from, yes, so we have now gone from making more money than I thought I would make in my life to literally only getting the disability I claimed from the Air Force. And so we are on baby step two, trying to work down our debt. As soon as I lost my job, we started contacting all our creditors and explaining the situation and everything's been great. Everyone's been very accommodating, which was, thank God, because I

was not expecting that. With the exception of today my wife's credit card company basically said we're not going to lower your monthly payment unless you go through a consolidation loan um and so they connected her with an organization called navicorp not familiar with them don't know anything about them you don't need to do that okay tell them to bite your ankle okay yeah no they're not in charge they're a stupid credit card company you're in charge so what were you making i was making 88 000 a year at the at the dream job that you just got laid off yes sir doing? I am a public relations specialist. Okay. What happened?

How did they screw up so bad they move a family from out of state only to lay them off? That's pretty freaking ridiculous. I'm not entirely sure. What was told to me is that I was not meeting their expectations for quality of work. Okay. Wow. Ouch. And I can only vouch for quality of work. Okay. Wow. Ouch. And I can only vouch for myself so much.

You know, I have a degree to go with it and seven and a half years of experience doing public relations for the Air Force. And that's all I know. You know, I have my opinion, but I don't think it's worth. Doesn't matter now. Their opinion counts because they own the place. They can do what they want okay so you're looking how long have you been looking literally since the day i got laid off no when was that uh that was on may 3rd okay just a couple weeks ago okay yes sir

all right so how's the hunt how's the hunt for me um it. You know, there have been a couple things that have kind of drawn out, but one was in Dallas, Texas, and they would want me there day one, and I don't know if I can move my family halfway across the country having just moved them upwards. Oh, you can. If you're choosing Dallas over D.C., in about 13 seconds I'll make that decision. And I believe you, and I agree there. I just, neither my wife and I through prayer have felt comfortable with it,

and so we're just trying to seek God's will as much as we can there. And then been applying for as many things as I possibly can. Had an interview this morning, but unfortunately it's sort of a different sort of communication, more of like a dispatcher communicator than telling people what's going on in the world communicator. But, yeah, if you know anyone who's hiring for a public relations person with 12 years of experience and a college degree. Jonathan in Washington, Dhington dc is looking okay so that was a bit selfish i apologize that's okay it's all good um how much money you got in the bank we have about sixteen hundred dollars in our credit in our yeah in our um does your wife work she does not no she um has

gone off work to you got a side hustle going yet i am actually i was about to throw on a tie and go out to our local warehouse store and uh apply for an in-person interview yep yep take all you can get right now just get some money coming in for food. Yeah, I was going to say the side hustle. And then, Jonathan, honestly, it's not a long-term thing, but the remote workplace is still booming. People are still doing so much remote. If you can find a company that maybe you're not there long-term, but it at least gets you into a career that you don't have to move your family

because you guys aren't comfortable with that right now, and then kind of settle into something and then and then maybe in a year you look for something else you know but finding something quickly i think is going to be the key and it may not be your passion it may not be everything that you love it may not be a company you love but you guys got 1600 bucks and i'm like you know what can you plug into very quickly uh the side hustle will be that bridge. But I'm thinking about health insurance. I mean, there's just a lot. There's a lot there.

And so you want to be able to have something fast. And I think because of the urgency, it may not be a thing that you absolutely are passionate about and love. But it's getting what you need for your family for the time. And then maybe that other opportunity comes, and you have the bandwidth to be able to do that. How old are you? I will be 34 in June. Okay.

Thank you for your service, by the way. Let me give you something to pray over and think about. It would be normal in your situation, because you felt like God led you to this and obviously didn't. And so sometimes in my life, in my spiritual walk, I have confused last night's pizza with the Holy Spirit. Or he did and he's teaching and there's a lesson for Jonathan to learn. I mean, it could be, but it didn't.

Short term, it doesn't look good, right? So sometimes I thought something was God and it wasn't is all I'm saying. And so what happens with that and getting fired for something you know you're good at, it shakes your confidence if you're a normal human being. At least it did mine when those kinds of things have happened to me. And so I would just pray about the Dallas move as to whether, ask God for real clear guidance as to whether that's his spirit that's troubling you or just you're not feeling confident right now, and so nothing that looks risky feels okay.

Nothing that has a high rate of change feels okay because you're at a low point emotionally. I'm not saying one way or another i'm not just declaring that that's god i don't know what god's will is for this in you for you but um but i am seeking peace and i want that peace to come from him and from strength not from um avoiding anything that looks like risk after I just got my lights punched out. Yeah. So just kind of lean into that, and you guys make sure that's what it is,

because with everything that's going on, I liked the sound of the Dallas thing, just looking in from the outside. Now, I've met you a whole three minutes ago, so I'm not an expert on Jonathan's life or what's good for you. Don't misunderstand. But out of everything you put in the mix here that sounded the most fun of anything you brought up um and obviously i'm i mean i like that city for a lot of different reasons but uh for opportunity for you and all kinds of things as far as PR goes. D.C., the PR stuff is much darker.

It's much more oriented around politics and social issues and those kinds of things rather than doing PR in a business setting or a ministry setting. Not as much of that in D.C. as there is in Dallas. So just something to think about. And no income tax in Texas. So there you go. Yeah, there you go. Helpful.

Yeah. That's fun. Yeah, there you go. Helpful. Yeah. That's fun. Yeah. I could just go on and on, but I'm going to leave it right there. I think Dave. We're going to go into the commercial break on time. This is The Ramsey Show. 20 plus years ago, I started teaching Financial Peace University with a bad suit and an overhead projector in a hotel ballroom. We would break up and have small group discussions after I would teach a lesson.

In those days, the lessons, there were 13 of them, and we taught them every other week. So you were with me for 26 weeks. It was $579 to go through. The first four people that went through cried a lot because I'm mean, because I love you so much, I'm going to make you do this stuff. All four of them are millionaires now. That's a lot of years ago, and it works.

Now, 10 million people have gone through this class sitting with coordinators that are a lot nicer than me who have a discussion with you after you go through one of the only nine lessons now. It's much sweeter now it's much easier now but it is still a proven system well dave i can find everything you teach in that on youtube yeah there's 400 youtube clips that you could go through that have fpu stuff in them if you want to wander around in that for three or four years and try to figure that out you can

oh by the way none of this i invented. It's all common sense. You could have just done that. Live on less than you make. You don't need us at all. But if you really want to do the right thing and do this stuff right down the line and do the system that is proven and has an average of an $8,000 turnaround in the first 90 days, if you go through the lessons at least one a week and you sit with your coordinator online or in person and are held accountable and encouraged if you're struggling

and scared we're all been there and if you do all of that that is an eight thousand dollar turnaround an average of fifty three hundred dollars in debt paid off in the first 90 days and a twenty seven hundred dollar savings in the first 90 days that's the average across 10 million People and some of those people did nothing And some of them were extremely Successful so all of that's going on And you could join Rachel's class Rachel is a coordinator Is it closed they're not letting people in

No but you can Deloney's starts next week I think Dr. John Deloney, Ken Coleman, Eddie Cullen Mine is closed And Jade's is closed then too yes yep because y'all are two weeks in yeah two weeks in too far yeah okay so um Rachel's got a very popular class Jade had a very has a very popular class but Coleman Deloney you can still get it on and George Campbell you can still get it on and Eddie Cullen our host yes so go to fpu.com if

you want to do that or just ramsaysolutions.com. I mean, you don't have to go to the celebrity coordinator Ramsey personality one if you don't want to. You want to go to a regular class at your church. That's cool. Or you want to just join a virtual class and one of our other people are your coordinator. That's fine. But you need the people in your life to make sure you're doing this system. Because if you'll submit yourself to this proven system, you're going to the results it works doesn't it oh yeah uh we had week we're on week

two with my class and so on monday we went through uh the debts or no no i guess it was on third no it was on wednesday it was last wednesday gosh it's been almost a week and uh three people there live got on the audio on the zoom and cut up one girl cut up five credit cards right there oh plastic surgery yep right right there it was great it said the classes are so fun you guys they really are whether you do it virtually or in person it's a it's a great community there's always good discussion people can ask questions uh you walk through the lesson together and i mean it's uh it really is it's worth it and if you do one of the personality ones, we're cramming all nine lessons in about three and a half weeks.

So there's two lessons per week. It's a mini term. Yes. So it's quick. So if you want to kind of get through it versus doing the lessons, you know, once a week and kind of keeping that rhythm, it's another option. So come join. There's a magic when people do things together versus just trying to do them on their own.

So this is a community experience, not a digital experience. It has digital elements to it. But you're going to change your life if you lean into this. We'll show you how. RamseySolutions.com. Check it out. All right. Millie's with us in Chattanooga.

Hi, Millie. Welcome to the Ramsey Show. Good afternoon, Dave. What's up? I have lessons to your show from the first time that you hit the airwave. And your plan has worked for me over the years. I'm now 72 years old. I'm happily retired in a beautiful mountain home.

Lived debt-free for years and years. My kind of folks. It's just a great retirement life when you are debt-free and you have all the money you need at retirement. Amen, Millie. Have at it. And there's some beautiful mountains around chattanooga to have a house on cool how can we help today well i ran into one dilemma and i guess that's because my

emotions are in this one i always thought that i did excellent making the accounting decisions over my lifetime and never stumbled anywhere. But I'm widowed, and so I'm engaged. And the thing is that I love my beautiful home, retirement home that I have built. And my fiance, he don't have the financial means that I have, and he lives in a small little home on a farm and i'm sitting here in 4 000 square feet home with sun rooms green porches you name it i got it all and he's in 1100 square foot little small farmhouse uh he does not want to leave the farm to live in my mountain home. Wait a minute. Why wouldn't

he? He gets you in the pick. He gets you with the deal. Yes, he gets me in the deal. Maybe I'm just going to have to kick him in the butt. I don't know. Millie, how far of a distance is the farmhouse and the mountain house? 15 minutes. Okay, Millie, he needs of a distance is the farmhouse and the mountain house?

15 minutes. Okay, Millie, he needs to move in with you and then keep his farmhouse. And he can go there when he wants to hang out and everything. Y'all can keep both? You can do weekends at the farm. Keep both. But he has suggested that we live at his house. And so, anyway, he wants me to or has suggested,

now he's never asked me for any money, even though he has a small Social Security income. He's never asked me for money, and I've known him since childhood. He has suggested that I invest about $150,000 to $200,000 in his home to make it the home that I would be comfortable in. No, I wouldn't do that. And so I can't see it because I keep telling myself, that's an awful costly marriage license.

Well, I don't think that's necessary to get married. I think he's going to marry you anyway because he's a smart man. We've been engaged over a year, and the family keeps it. Now, I have no children, but his family is wonderful to me. So here's what I would do. His house is paid for, right? Yes. Your house is paid for, right?

Yes, paid for. And how much of Your house is paid for, right? Yes. And how much of a nest egg do you have, kiddo? I have over a million. All right. I would just leave his house as your weekend property. Y'all both hang some clothes. Now, this is after you're married. Hang some clothes in both houses.

I got a lake house about an hour and 15 minutes south of my house, and I love it, but I ain't going to live down there. It's too far away. But I'm down there most weekends in the summer and a couple of them in the winter, and I keep a set of clothes down there. I just throw a backpack in the car, and I go down there. Sharon and I, that's our second home. And you've got a wonderful farm, beautiful little farm with a nice little house on it that's your wonderful second home and y'all go spend weekends on the farm and weekdays up at the other place or vice versa and keep them both but i would not i would not improve that property it's not what you want to do that's why i wouldn't do it because you don't want to do it well that and what is does he have a quick reasoning to why he wants

to stay in the farmhouse is he just like being like, being by the farm? Like, I wonder what his reason is. Well, the house was built in 1905, and it was his grandfather's and his father's home. I would not get rid of it. Yeah, don't sell it. Don't sell it, but I wouldn't improve it. I would just use it as my weekend farm home. Well, I think the conclusion that I'm thinking of right now, Dave,

since you mentioned that, is I think I'll that I'm thinking of right now, Dave, since you mentioned that, is I think I'll just take one extra bedroom in it and build me a large walk-in closet. So when Millie's going to hang some clothes up, she's taking a bedroom. I'm just saying. A hundred percent. Millie, you are the most fun I've had in a long time. Well done. I love it.

Yeah, you need to tell this guy to paint or get off the ladder. Y'all get married and use the farm as a weekend home. And just turn that bedroom into a walk-in closet. You got a plan. This is The Ramsey personality, is my co-host today. Open phones here at 888-825-5225. Hey, if you're brand new to this show, and a whole bunch of you are, based on our ratings increases and our ranking increases and so forth,

we appreciate all of you being here. And, of course, if you're hearing stuff like baby steps and debt snowballs and you don't know what all that means, you want to get plugged in, go to RamseySolutions.com for free and click on the Get Started button, it'll help you figure out where you are and what your next steps are, and you'll start to learn the lingo of the stuff we're talking about and figure out how you can best apply some of this and start to change your life. So, hey, that's what we're here for. The phone number here, 888-825-5225. Brian's in New York City. Hey, Brian, how are you?

Hey, Dave, Rachel. Pleasure to speak with you. Thanks for taking the call. Sure. What's up? So my wife and I are out of debt. We built up our fully funded emergency fund and we're in baby step 3B. We are currently renting. We're about an hour away from the city. So and we commute into the city to work and we're trying to save up for a down payment and we're doing, we're trying to cut corners and take every step we can to increase the amount that we can save each month. And I'm just wondering if I should change my retirement down to zero and what my wife should do with her percentage at work.

Currently, I'm working part-time, and I'm also staying at home with the kids, so we're cutting out child care there. And she works as a nurse manager full-time, and her job has a 50% match at 50 i mean i'm sorry a 50 match and she currently has it at four percent so i'm just not sure what we should be doing to try to get the most amount possible and uh just trying to figure out ways to yeah have you guys um kind of done a timeline brian to say hey if she does pause because i would i would encourage you guys to pause for a period of time while you're saving just to increase the cash flow like what you're what you're what you mentioned do you know how long it would take you guys to save up a down payment if you guys paused all retirement and through all the extra money you guys have per month? It's probably going to be a couple years.

Currently, we have $6,000 down payment, and we have $5,000 in a car fund. And I guess if need be, we can combine them. But yeah, to get a good down payment, especially in this area, it's going to take a couple years at least. How old are you? payment, especially in this area, it's going to take a couple of years at least. How old are you? I am 31 and my wife's birthday is actually today and she is not going to say. So if you started saving for retirement at 15% of your household income, beginning at age 33, you would retire a multimillionaire.

Okay. And so if you take two years off and save up a down payment and then you start, the trick is don't take two years off and then keep spending like you're in Congress. You don't need to be going out to eat. We're saving for a house. We don't need to be going on vacation. We're saving for a house. We're saving for a house we don't need to be going on vacation we're saving for a house we're saving for a house we're said we're sacrificing the match we're sacrificing the

compound interest we're sacrificing our investments to get a house so by god let's get the house don't screw around the edges of this you see what i'm saying You got to play through for this to make sense. If you just stop retirement and then you lollygag along for five years, this is not good. Okay, so you're thinking somewhere in the range of one to three years? Yes. Yeah, three years would be the max I would be unplugged. And so you got to set yourself a goal and say, how much have we got to save a month to be there? And what have we got to do to make that happen? And that may be working extra.

That may be cutting other things or maybe other things involved. But you've got to set this as a detailed thing because the danger of some of the stuff that we teach is if you don't do it all, it'll leave you hanging. Because we tell you to stop retirement and, you know, get out of debt. But if you don't go get out of debt, then you never start retirement again. In your case, you've got your emergency fund. I'm going to really enhance this 3B because this is an expensive area. I need some down payment money. Yeah. And Brian, too, we, for first-time home buyers, because you said you're renting, you know, we say anywhere from five to 10 percent for a down payment. So be looking on that side so that you guys can press play back into retirement.

And then you're on baby steps four, five and six. And then you're throwing extra money that you guys have at the house. But I love 20 percent down because you avoid PMI. But for first time homebuyer getting out, Rachel's right. Let's get the deal done. Yeah. And, you know, 5%, 10% down, something like that. You're going to have some PMI, but get her done and then get that retirement going and then get that mortgage paid down and get rid of that PMI. That would be your next thing. Arthur's in Richmond, Virginia.

Hey, Arthur, how are you? I'm good. How are you guys doing? Better than we deserve. What's up? So I had a question. i've seen you guys give some career advice i want to ask you um i i am in a job right now and i don't think my boss is very good at doing his boss job and um so i'm wondering i really have some one main question is how do i

when do i know how bad it has to get before i leave and then also maybe doing things that i know aren't aren't useful to his to the people under him including myself when do and things that i just think are wrong when do i when would i go to his boss and um kind of report things i don't want to obviously stir the pot and just like start fights at work with with his boss about it or, or, um, cause problems at work. But, um, I just don't know, like when is, when is the right time to go to his boss about things that he's doing or lack of or not doing. And, um, when would I know it's just time to move on and go to a different company?

Arthur, is it, is it, is it any of it moral issues or is it more just leadership style? Like he's not engaged where he should be and he's not communicating. Is it more of those kinds of attributes or is there stuff going on that you're more just leadership style? Like he's not engaged where he should be and he's not communicating. Is it more of those kinds of attributes or is there stuff going on that you're like, that's flat out wrong, borderline immoral? Um, so leadership style, I can get over, but like one is competency and leadership. Like, um, I'm a salesperson. I've been number one in my company for the past five months. And, um, some of the advice he gives me,'m just like yeah i would never do that like i don't i don't understand where you're getting this advice

and i don't believe he has the experience to back up his like his role as also a teaching manager um in sales and then how long have you been there five months i've been there about six months how How old are you? I'm 26. How old is he? Oh, gosh, like 50-something. So what do you think the probability that you talking to his boss is going to fix all this? I don't know. I don't know because his boss does ask me questions about him, and I'll give him honest feedback. I don't know what it's going to change, honestly. I really don't know because his boss does ask me questions about him, and I'll give him honest feedback. I don't know what it's going to change, honestly. I really don't.

Well, I mean, there's two possibilities. One is realistic. One is not. One possibility is they move him on. They fire him because he can't do his job, and their number one sales guy is talking to leadership about that. Okay? That's a possibility that's reasonable the possibility that this 55 year old guy who is not competent suddenly becomes competent because you talk to his boss is precisely zero okay think about it

they can't train him up on the things he's doing in a short period of time. These are long pattern things that have to be fixed. So you're either going to endure him while he's growing, which is really doubtful, or he's going to be removed, or you're going to be labeled and you'll be gone. Right. That's something I'm worried about. I wouldn't be worried about it you're gonna quit anyway so what's it matter so that's i guess the other question then in terms of quitting um like so i don't know like it's good money and i'm making good money and i'm happy in

that sense but it's just it's a mess all the time with like, you know, management. So I don't know. I don't know what point I should leave because I'm not growing personally except things I learned on my own, but I'm not learning from the company anymore. So I don't know when. I would have something else in place, Arthur, before you go in and just quit though, right? Because there's sales jobs everywhere.

If you're a great salesperson, you can find a lot of things to sell and find good culture in other companies. It doesn't sound like it's a great culture. I think you've lost faith in the entire organization, not just this one guy. And it's probably time for you to go get something else. Which, thankfully, your skill set is very broad, right, Arthur? So I think you could kill it a lot of places. Go get something else. And then be aware that you might be 26

and after six months, you don't know it all. That's possible too. Yes, I thought about that too, Arthur. A little humility. Just remember that. This is The Ramsey Show. Hey, it's Rachel Cruz. If you love the show and want a deeper dive

on your money journey, we have a weekly newsletter that gives you trending and helpful articles and tips on following the Ramsey way. want a deeper dive on your money journey, we have a weekly newsletter that gives you trending and helpful articles and tips on following the Ramsey way. Just go to ramsesolutions.com today to sign up for our newsletter. Again, that's ramsesolutions.com to sign up for our weekly newsletter.