The Ramsey Show - App - How Do I Advise a Friend To Not Get Engaged to Her Boyfriend? (Hour 2)

Episode Date: February 8, 2021

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studios, it's the Ramsey Show, where debt is dumb, cash is king, and the paid off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW as the status symbol of choice. Anthony O'Neill, Ramsey personality, is my co-host today. Open phones at 888-825-5225. That's 888-825-5225. As we talk about your life, and we talk about your money, and we talk about your life, and we talk about your money, and it's all here. Starting off this hour is going to be Cedar Falls, Iowa. Elise is with us. Hi, Elise. How are you?
Starting point is 00:01:04 Good. How are you? Good. How are you all? Better than we deserve. What's up? So I just want to say thank you for everything that you and Ayo do, especially I am loving that black panel conversations on his YouTube channel. My question today is not so much financial but just personal. So I am just wanting to know like the boundaries and guidelines of when it's appropriate to talk to a friend about a big life decision
Starting point is 00:01:32 and the fine line of wanting to help them but may not be close enough to the right to say anything on the subject. So my friend is in a relationship with this, a very, very nice man, but she is a believer and he is not. And she is adamant that she doesn't want to marry any guy who is a non-believer. And during this process, their relationship, he's been very close to becoming a believer, but they have had discussions of potentially becoming engaged, maybe in like the next month or two. And my big concern is that she's just going to get lost, and it's going to be really difficult for their marriage. And he knows that she won't marry him unless he's a believer. And so I'm just worried that the pressure of engagement is going to make him decide a decision that isn't actually what he decides. And he's actually going to want to become a believer, not because of the faith,
Starting point is 00:02:44 but or his relationship with Christ, but more so to be with the girl. And I just don't know if I am the right person to have that conversation. I'm close with her, and I've kind of been in a similar situation. What if the shoes were reversed? Yeah. And she came to you. Could you hear her? I think so.
Starting point is 00:03:08 Is she close enough to you to tell you some kind of a hard, have a hard conversation with you and you hear it? Yeah. Well, then you're close enough to her. And here's the thing. Say it. Say it with love. Say it one time and move on. Yeah. Amen. You know, this is not your this is not your crusade. Right. This is a concern. Yeah. Don't lose any sleep over it. Pray about it. Talk to her if she she receives it. Great.
Starting point is 00:03:37 If she doesn't, you did your part as a friend. But do not allow this and her decision for her life to impact you and how you're moving forward. And also on the flip side, and I could be wrong here, so correct me if I'm wrong, Dave, this could potentially hurt the relationship depending on how she receives it. And you have to be okay with that as well. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:00 That's the risk. Yeah. Real friends will risk pissing somebody off. Absolutely. Otherwise, you're not a real friend. Yeah. Right. Now, we're not setting out to make them mad.
Starting point is 00:04:11 We're not setting out to hurt them. Yeah. But you know that that's a risk. So if I were in your shoes, what I would do is I wouldn't make statements. I would ask questions. That's so good, Dave. Write down ask questions. That's so good, Dave. Write down five questions. And it might say, okay, you told me long before you met so-and-so
Starting point is 00:04:32 that you did not want to marry someone who did not share your faith in Christ. Is that still true? That's a question. Are you going to, and now that he's in the picture, it appears you guys are getting really serious. And the reason I'm talking to you about this is I'm worried for you. And I want you to have a good life because I love you. You're my friend. And so if he does not share your your faith are you going to go forward
Starting point is 00:05:07 and marry him anyway that's the second question you might ask um third question is how you think that's going to work out yeah yeah i mean and these are questions and a part of that and a part of that third question is to even go deeper. That question is, if y'all do get married, how is that going to work out for your family? How are you going to teach your kids? You know, if y'all have two doctrines that you don't believe on, you know, and then ask her a soft one. Ask her one that doesn't really come off so hard. Like, hey, so how is the relationship going going that may be something to start off with and the only other one i would throw in
Starting point is 00:05:49 is are you concerned this is passive aggressive but it's still a question are you concerned he might pretend to convert to a person of faith in order to put a ring on your finger yeah and if she says yes to that i might then say how can you guard against that but you know what dave i'm the answer to that question is time slow down and us young men we are known for saying yes to something or doing something that we already know we really don't want to do just to get the hand in marriage, you know? And so that's a real good question. Yeah. And just slow down anything. And listen,
Starting point is 00:06:30 if she's just all bubbly and over the top and is not listening and shuts you down on a series of five, six questions that sound like that, then you've done your job, right? Because you really cannot, you know, it is not illegal to be stupid.
Starting point is 00:06:46 If it was, I'd have been in jail a long time ago. Yeah, I mean, you're going to watch, part of being a grown-up is you're going to watch people that you love in your family and outside your family, people that you love do things that are harmful to themselves, and you really can't do squat about it. It's just hard yeah it's hard watching your friends drive their car right towards the wall it is it's hard watching your uh friends hit the wall it is or family members you know and you go there's a wall i know but it's fun yeah i think apart from me davis it's hard up front but after i've said my piece is not hard you got to walk then that you got to be a you cannot be it's not a crusade it's five questions
Starting point is 00:07:31 and it's short and it's very clear don't sugarcoat it and don't turn it into a preaching session that's good you're not there to preach yeah you're there to ask questions and that she should be asking herself yeah and you're just clarifying and you're saying okay it sounds to me like you're going to go forward with this and i'll just tell you i'm going to pray for you because i'm really concerned yeah and then you just walk away from the subject and you can stay in her life but she's not that translation those my grandmother should say those convinced against their will are of the same opinion still yeah yeah and i would definitely on this show people call in and and after the third time that they want to argue with the same advice that i've given for 30 years you
Starting point is 00:08:15 hang up on them i just i'll put them on hold and move on because i'm talk to somebody that actually wants the advice because otherwise i'm just arguing with a wall. Yeah. Just, you know, what was it my dad used to say? You'd argue with a fence post. Y'all ever heard that one? Argue with a fence post. But you know what, Dave? That's a country thing right there. I want to encourage you to listen to John Deloney's show.
Starting point is 00:08:34 He did a video on how to have the hard conversation with the loved one. Ah. Lots of questions. Yes. Lots of questions. Yeah. This is the Daveave ramsey show imagine the day you submit the last payment on your debt and you finally have extra money to spend and save how you want for some of you that day feels like it will never come. I get it.
Starting point is 00:09:05 I've been there. But it doesn't have to be that way. It's a new year, and it's time for a new way of thinking. You have to believe you can get rid of debt and take control of your money because you can. And it won't take nearly as long as you think. With Ramsey Plus, you'll learn practical ways to get small, quick wins that add up to big results fast.
Starting point is 00:09:27 We'll help you put more money back in your bank account so you can get where you want to be faster, debt-free and spending your money without worry. This year, you can make more progress on your debt and savings than you ever thought possible, and you can start today. Get Ramsey Plus so you can start living the life you want faster. To start your free trial of Ramsey Plus, a question is Scott from Los Angeles. Hey, Scott, how are you? I'm good. Thanks, guys.
Starting point is 00:10:12 Good. How can we help? I just, well, my wife and I have been listening for a long time. Just paid everything off except for the house. Way to go. Thank you. And we've decided we'd like to leave California. We're kind of tired of it. Amen. Yep. So we're heading out here to... You're the only one. I wish that was true. Maybe two years ago would have been better. But we're here on
Starting point is 00:10:36 our way. And we're kind of surprised in a way because a couple years ago, home values were a little bit lower. And we've realized that things are more expensive, and now it seems like it's going to be more of a lateral move as far as the mortgage is concerned. We will save money, but not as much as I thought, and so that's of concern. I thought it would be, you know, we'd have more money left over, if that makes sense. Sure. What part of California are you in? We're down in Los Angeles.
Starting point is 00:11:01 Okay. And what part of L.A.? Marina Del Rey. Okay. And you're comparing that to Williamson County here Los Angeles. Okay. And what part of L.A.? Marina Del Rey. Okay. And you're comparing that to Williamson County here. Exactly. Okay. In Tennessee, outside of Nashville.
Starting point is 00:11:10 Yep. Okay. Well, home prices have gone up here, but they've not doubled or anything like that. And they're still considerably lower than Marina Del Rey per square foot and so forth. Now, you are – It's more square feet. Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:28 You can get a bigger house for sure, yeah. But, yeah, it's easier. So the homes that you're liking over here are going to use up the money from over there. Okay. And, well, it's not a move down in that regard then because you're going to move up in lifestyle. Better schools. We don't have to worry about the homeless out with our children. But I mean, and you're talking about more square feet.
Starting point is 00:11:52 Huge. 1,400 versus 4,700? Yeah. It's shocking. Yeah, okay. So that's, yeah. How much of a home are you looking to buy? The homes here that I'm looking at are anywhere between a million and, I'd say, 1 to 1.5.
Starting point is 00:12:07 Yeah. That's the average. I thought it would be 770, but that was a couple years ago. That's the average around here. Yeah. Well, the difference is that the prices didn't go up so much as the square footages went up in the area. Right. The size of the McMansion in Williamson County is larger because Williamson County is the 11th wealthiest county in the nation right now uh it has attracted so much wealth into this area it started with
Starting point is 00:12:30 health care and country music people and then it's gone from there um and I moved in and brought the neighborhood down but um but the uh uh but yeah that's that's so yeah it's just a you know you're gonna get 4700 instead of 1400 you, it's just, you know, you're going to get $4,700 instead of $1,400. You're going to get a different environment that you're going to live in. We'll just call it that to be nice. And so. I penciled the numbers out, and it's going to save me a couple grand a year. And that's not including state income tax.
Starting point is 00:13:00 Not including taxes. Not including everything else. Just, you know, just move over. The mortgage is about the same. Yeah. I'd love to pay the mortgage off someday, but it's going to take some time. Yeah. I mean, as long as you're doing it on a 15-year fixed or less, and you're still young, you've
Starting point is 00:13:16 got plenty of time to knock that thing out. You've still got a game plan to knock it out. Put it on a 15 plan and knock it out in 7 to 10, which is what I would tell anybody anywhere, then that doesn't really change in this situation but more than anything you're just this trip over you're just getting you got a little sticker shock this time yeah i expected just to kind of take a look at the area understand where everything was and then there happened to be a house that kind of fell out of yeah and that it's hard to find these places you probably can do what you're talking
Starting point is 00:13:44 about doing it won't be down all the way to from a million and a half down to 700 but you probably could take a step back like where you were in the other trip but you're going to go out one more county right uh into a much more rural setting um and you're going to get a different vibe in that county you're going to be in rural t rural Tennessee rather than in suburbia Tennessee if you do that. Again, there's lots of wonderful counties around here. This isn't the only one, but
Starting point is 00:14:13 this is just the most expensive one where you're standing. I wouldn't say you're making a bad financial move. You're not being irresponsible or something by doing this. It sounds like you're just experiencing a little bit more of the sticker shock. And seeing the houses are just so massive, it does kind of shock you for a moment. I'm in a 30-year fixed loan over there.
Starting point is 00:14:37 So switching over to a 15, if I tried it, that would probably change things. I'd probably be stuck with another 30, I would think. You probably could buy less than 4,700 if you look around, too. Yeah. That's possible. I mean, there's other things in the market in the 3,000 range and that kind of thing, footage-wise. You can still double your square footage. Sure.
Starting point is 00:14:55 But, you know, again, it may just be. One of the things I do when I'm looking at property in an area that I don't know is I just enjoy the whole process of gathering every stinking piece of information in other words I want to know every neighborhood I want to know this one over here and Anthony's had you know he had a lot tied up out in an area that's just out south of here he's going to build a house and he decided not to and you know and then he ended up in downtown Nashville and in a re-gentrified area and so forth and so uh i just enjoy the gathering of information and i think you might need to do a little bit more of that too that might give you some more options it may lead you right back to where you were but you might be more comfortable with the option that you're
Starting point is 00:15:40 looking at today after you've used the others to swing you back over to it if that makes sense does that make any sense yeah yeah it's it's um it's hard to go back though yeah i don't think i can go back and i just finished paying off me and my wife 400k so we're way to go yeah we're uh well welcome to tennessee brother thanks man good to have you thanks guys open phones this hour this is the ramsey show anthony o'Neill is my co-host today. Ramsey personality answering your questions. Julie is with us in Washington, D.C. Hey, Julie, how are you?
Starting point is 00:16:12 I'm good. How are you, Dave? Good. How can we help? I'm calling today with a question about using an inheritance that I received to either invest or pay off my mortgage. And I'm a longtime listener of the show. And I know that you always say that, you know, if I'm already investing 15%, then I should go ahead and throw extra money on the mortgage.
Starting point is 00:16:35 And I guess two parts of this is, you know, I still have about $430,000 on the mortgage, but I think we're probably going to move in the next two to three years. And so thinking about it, you know, the inheritance is $150,000. So I can't completely pay off the mortgage. And I'm concerned I would earn more, you know, investing that for two years and getting a good return rather than, you know, what the house might appreciate in the two years before we move. And so I was hoping you could better explain why you recommend the mortgage route in this situation. The house is going to appreciate exactly the same amount whether it has debt on it or not. Sure.
Starting point is 00:17:15 So you putting the $150,000 on it doesn't cause more appreciation. The only savings you would have would be the interest rate on that amount of debt, whatever your mortgage interest rate is. And as compared to what you might make on a mutual fund, that might be small, to your point, to your concern. I would put it on the mortgage anyway. And the reason is that I am going to have a paid-off mortgage, whether it's selling this property and moving the equity to another property, but I'm going to have a paid-off home as a part of your financial plan as soon as I possibly can
Starting point is 00:17:48 because all of the data with all the millionaires that we work with, from the millionaire study that Hogan did, says that there's two primary things that cause people to have their first million-dollar net worth, first $1 to $5 million net worth, and that is their 401k retirement savings. Yes. And you're not going to put it in that because it's payroll deduct. And a paid-off home mortgage. We did not find a single millionaire out of 10,000 of them that we studied that said,
Starting point is 00:18:19 I became wealthy because I never paid off my home, and I used all of that money to invest. Right. All of them either had their homes paid off or were heading towards having their homes paid off. They never once said, oh, I would never pay off my home because I always want to invest. And one key thing she said there today was she thinks. So, yeah, so still, put it on the mortgage because things may change, too. If you do stay, you can pay off the mortgage. If you don't stay, they're going to give you that money at the closing when you sell the house.
Starting point is 00:18:53 Exactly. It's going to come in the form of equity and come back to you. So you don't lose the money. What you are going to lose, potentially, in the short term, is what you would have made in a mutual fund versus your mortgage interest rate, which might be $15,000 a year, might be $2,000 a year, something like that. But I'm going with the data, and the data says paid off home, one step to being a millionaire. And I'm always going to move that direction.
Starting point is 00:19:24 So that keeps me right on those baby steps. You can certainly do what you want to do. That's what I would do. This is The Dave Ramsey Show. Over the years, I've heard countless horror stories from listeners about being harassed by debt collectors, receiving calls at work on their cell phones, and some even getting yelled at and threatened. That is not okay. There are laws against this, and there are people, attorneys, that can help make this stop if they are in fact breaking the law. Go to CollectionBully.com to learn more.
Starting point is 00:20:08 Fill out a quick questionnaire that will identify if you are a victim of this type of illegal harassment. That's CollectionBully.com. In the lobby of Ramsey Solutions on the debt-free stage, Aaron and Whitney are with us. Whitney are with us. Hi, guys. How are you? Good. How are you? Welcome.
Starting point is 00:20:43 Where do you guys live? Franklin Furnace, Ohio. Oh, fun. Welcome to Nashville. What brings you all the way here? A debt-free scream, I assume. Yes, sir. Awesome. How much have you guys paid off? We paid off $30,000 in six months. All right. Way to go. And your range of income during that time? Started out about 54 and ended up about 80. Okay, cool. Okay. What do you guys do for a living? I'm a service technician for a telephone internet provider.
Starting point is 00:21:13 Mm-hmm. And a stay-at-home mom. Oh, very cool. She's got the hard jobs. Yeah, for real. So you kicked in some overtime or picked up some extra jobs, huh? Yeah, a lot of overtime. Probably about 1,000 hours overtime. You've been kicking it man oh yeah way to go dude set your family free huh
Starting point is 00:21:29 oh yeah thirty thousand dollars in six freaking months tell us about this what got you so fired up uh well we've been just fighting it forever and ever man it's just like no matter what we did nothing worked um she actually went to financial peace probably about six months before we got real heavy into it. I didn't have anything to do with it. And then I was working out of town, and then it became my idea. Oh. Okay. How come you weren't into it at first?
Starting point is 00:22:04 I wasn't, like, she was going to church at the time, and I was just led way far astray. She brought me back, and here we are. Okay. So tell us a story, Whitney. What happened from your perspective? They just had a class at church, and our pastor led it. And then I just kept pushing, you need, and our pastor let it. And then I just kept pushing, you know, you need to listen to Dave Ramsey.
Starting point is 00:22:28 You need to listen. And he was hesitant. But then finally, when it was his idea, he was on board. Okay. All right. So you just started listening to the podcast while you were out of town, or what? Yeah. We picked up a lot of overtime. So I was driving to Lexington, Kentucky.
Starting point is 00:22:42 It's probably about two hours. And, I mean, you can't do nothing while you're driving i just ended up finding you and then i started downloading the podcast and i mean i just it just ate it all up man boom just like that so you guys decide to okay we're going to do the financial peace university the dave ramsey stuff wide open we're going to get on a budget we're going to get out of debt what happened uh we put disney world on a credit card and that's really what set it off yeah oh wow the famous last trip huh yeah i had this harebrained idea that you know if you don't you get these credit cards and you well we'll just put all our bills on this and we'll get you know the 50 points or whatever.
Starting point is 00:23:27 It doesn't work, so don't do that. So, Whitney, he comes home and says, now it's my idea, and you went finally? Yes, yeah. Okay. All right. So what was the hardest part of getting out of debt? All the extra hours, I guess. Getting on the same page, I would say. for me, I'm the free spender.
Starting point is 00:23:50 Didn't want to give up anything. But then once we got a budget, we didn't really give up as much as I thought. How'd y'all do a budget with Aaron working so many hours? My brother, my oldest brother, he is a super nerd. So he loves spreadsheets and stuff. And I just asked him one day to help us with this. And we downloaded it on our phones, Google Sheets. And we punched everything in.
Starting point is 00:24:18 And once a week or once every two weeks, we'd have a budget meeting. And at first it was hard. But now it's like the most exciting day of the week for me. Oh, man, that's so cool. What would you say is the secret that you want to tell everyone, young people listening to you right now? What should they be doing right now? Oh, here's one thing.
Starting point is 00:24:37 Why should they get out of debt? Because, like, even right now, I feel like we're kind of ahead of the game, but we're really not. I mean, I'm 33, she's 31. And I just think back all the dumb stuff we did decades ago, how much money we would have right now. And it's fun being weird, I'll just say that. How does it feel to be completely done? Amazing. Free, right?
Starting point is 00:25:04 Yes. Yeah. So we started back, what was it, January last year? Mm-hmm. So we was out of debt in July, and here we are February this year, and we're on step five. Wow. I mean, we cash flowed a down payment for our new old house. It's awesome.
Starting point is 00:25:28 Wow. Way to go, you guys. Congratulations. Feels good, huh? What do you tell people the key to getting out of debt is? For me, it's just patience. One of the verses that really helped me is Romans 5.3. It says we glory in tribulations because tribulations
Starting point is 00:25:45 bring forth patience, brings forth experience, character, and hope. If you just stay that course you can get through anything. Wait, wait, wait. You see what just happened there? He just quoted scripture. I heard that. And six months ago he wasn't
Starting point is 00:26:02 in the church. I heard that. This is what I'm talking about. I'm more excited about this than you paying off your debt. I ain't gonna, he wasn't in the church. I heard that. This is what I'm talking about. There you go. I'm more excited about this than you paying off your debt. I ain't going to lie. That's good, man. And that's one of my favorite scriptures. I love Romans 5.3. Okay, then.
Starting point is 00:26:14 Rejoice in your suffering. I don't think so. Well, suffering produces perseverance, and perseverance character, and character hope, and hope is a gift of the Holy Spirit. Yeah, well done, guy. That's awesome, man. Very cool. I love it. Good for you guys. So fun. or hope and hope is a gift of the holy spirit yeah well done guy that's awesome man very cool i love it good for you guys so fun and the kiddos uh what are their names and ages bring them into
Starting point is 00:26:32 the shot uh brayden is 14 and amelia is four so have they been tracking with you on this or you've been dragging them yeah we dragged uh brayden We actually read through the Smart Money, Smart Kids. Oh, wow. And it must be sinking in because his iPad that he had for like, I don't know, seven, eight years crapped out. And he bought his own new iPad. Whoa. Way to go, man. Yes.
Starting point is 00:27:00 Well done. I told him if he gets any scholarship, too, we have a 5% cash back. He's been hitting that pretty hard, too. Nice. Very nice. Well, you guys, you've changed your family tree. You've not only changed the way you had a little bit of debt you cleaned up, but on top of that, you changed your life, your marriage, your parenting, everything.
Starting point is 00:27:21 I'm so proud of you. Well done, guys. Very, very well done. Excellent job. Good stuff. All right, Aaron and Whitney, Braden and Amelia. Yes. Lexington, KY area.
Starting point is 00:27:34 $30,000 paid off in six months, making 54 to 80. Lots of hard work and OT. Count it down. Let's hear a debt-free scream. Three, two, one. We a debt-free scream three two one that's how it's done right there man that is fun oh you know these stories almost always contain the part where is it for a married couple anyway, where the other one had to get on board.
Starting point is 00:28:07 Yep. And when that happens, it's like, ding, ding, here we go. And it clicked. Game on. And it clicked. Game on. Here we go. Sounds like it even helped their marriage, Dave. Yeah, absolutely.
Starting point is 00:28:16 No question about it. Open phones at 888-825-5225. Sam is with us in Hawaii. Hi, Sam. How are you? Hi, Mr. Ramsey. Good to talk to you. You too.
Starting point is 00:28:29 I'm short on time. Give me your question right quick. Okay, so we just got a newborn baby, and the girlfriend is at home with the kids, so we got a single income. I'm a full-time Uber driver, and I've accumulated some traffic tickets that I think might be affecting my background check, and I'm thinking if the background check doesn't go through, I'll be out of a job. In the meantime, I also just found out I have $8,000 in taxes I have to owe this coming year in April.
Starting point is 00:29:04 What are you making driving Uber? That would be about $4,000 in taxes I have to owe this coming year in April. What are you making driving over? That would be about $4,000 a month. And what are the traffic tickets cost? The traffic tickets are about $1,200. Well, take them out first. Yeah. And then you've got to get on this taxes and you've got to get on it hard. You're probably going to need to file
Starting point is 00:29:25 your income tax return on time, even if you don't pay. And then you contact the IRS about what's called an installment plan and put that on payments until you can clear it. And, dude, you want to clear it as fast as possible because the penalties and the interest are ridiculous dealing with the IRS, plus they have almost unlimited power. So you're probably not going to quite clear it all by April 15th, but you get the tickets cleared first and then get after the IRS fast,
Starting point is 00:29:55 but by midsummer it all needs to be gone. And, oh, you've got to start setting back your quarterly estimates so you don't owe taxes next year. Anthony O'Neill Ramsey personality is my co-host today. If you're wondering if you should be buying or selling a home or if you should put it on hold, well, this is a big financial decision, and big financial decisions should happen on your timeline. Well, Dave, I'm panicking because of the pandemic. Dave, I'm panicking because of interest rates. And, Dave, listen, every time you're panicking, if you start your sentence with I'm panicking or I'm afraid,
Starting point is 00:30:48 everything after the sentence is something you shouldn't do. Don't do stuff because you're afraid. I mean, unless it's get out of the way of a car or dodge a snake. But other than that, you don't need to make decisions when you're afraid. There are always bad decisions. Fear does not induce clarity. Quite the opposite. So don't wait around for the stars to align to buy a home or sell a home.
Starting point is 00:31:14 Truth is, you can win in any market in any season if you put the right people on your team. If you want to find a top real estate agent in your area, like one of our endorsed local providers, our ELPs, they use years of experience and success in changing markets to serve you. They know what things look like. They know what's happening out there. And that's the only agent in your area I trust. If you want to make a move that's right for your family, text HOUSE to 33789. 33789, text the word HOUSE, and you'll get somebody in your corner to help you,
Starting point is 00:31:53 and you'll make much better decisions. Not time to make decisions when you're scared, right? Right, absolutely, Dave. Anthony O'Neill, Ramsey Personality, is my co-host today. Claire is in Idaho Falls, Idaho. Hi, Claire, how are you? Hi, Dave, good O'Neill, Ramsey Personality, is my co-host today. Claire is in Idaho Falls, Idaho. Hi, Claire. How are you? Hi, Dave.
Starting point is 00:32:09 Good. How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up? Hi. Me and my husband, we're graduating college. We've made it out debt-free. Yay!
Starting point is 00:32:19 Yeah. So he's doing software engineering, so we're going to move just wherever he gets a job because he's going to make more than I do. I've been working, putting him through school, just working at the courthouse. And there I have about $2,000 that I've put away in a retirement fund through my work. I'm not going to continue working there. So I'm wondering if I should pull you know, pull the 2000 from my retirement and then what I should do with it. No, you should never pull from your retirement. I don't care if it's only a thousand dollars. Uh, what I want you to do is transfer that over Claire to a traditional
Starting point is 00:32:55 IRA. Um, we get on the phone with a smart investor pro, um, or you could possibly do that yourself with $2,000. Uh, but I would suggest a smart investor pro and just let it sit there and start investing into the ira moving forward until you both land a job and then go back into your matches then your roth the intraditionals those are the three main things i teach and we actually teach when it comes to investing but do not pull it out don't spend it go ahead and transfer it into your retirement account direct transfer rollover into an ir into an IRA is what he's talking about with a SmartVestor Pro, and they can help you pick a mutual fund to do that. It's not the end of the world if you cash out a $2,000 account. It's just kind of silly to give the government half your money.
Starting point is 00:33:34 Right. And that's what you're going to do, so I wouldn't do it. We don't cash out retirement accounts unless it's to avoid bankruptcy or foreclosure. You're certainly, you know, not going to have either one of those in this situation. Tracy's in Lexington, Kentucky. Hi, Tracy. Welcome to the Ramsey Show. How can we help?
Starting point is 00:33:52 Hi, Dave. I have a quick question. I think it's pretty cut and dried. I'm 53 years old. My husband's a retired school teacher. I started late. I stayed home with the kids. So I'm seven to nine years before I can hit four or multiple for a full teacher pension.
Starting point is 00:34:10 My question is, we have 14 years left on our home mortgage at a rate of 2.75. Do we continue to hit outside of our pension? We both have a pension. We have 401K and Roth. Which should I be hitting the hardest? With the market returns, it looks like the 401K returns much better than 2.75, which is on our home mortgage. Are you debt-free except your home?
Starting point is 00:34:40 No, we have $17,000 on one vehicle. Before we even have this discussion, that has to go. Okay. So your number one thing is clearing that up. Do you have an emergency fund of three to six months of expenses? Yes. How much? Right at $20,000.
Starting point is 00:35:00 Oh, good. Pay your car off today. Yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah, car off today. Yeah. Oh. Oh. Okay. Yeah, that's all I got. Then your next number one goal, and I want you to do a written, detailed budget with your husband. Your number one goal is to build your emergency fund back up.
Starting point is 00:35:19 Yeah. What's y'all's annual income? Okay. Right at $100. Good. So you're going to do this very quickly. Very quickly. It's going to be very quickly.
Starting point is 00:35:30 If you're not willing to pay the car off today, you should sell it. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Because you've already owned the car. The only question is, are you going to own the debt? So we're going to clear the debt. Now you don't have a car payment anymore.
Starting point is 00:35:44 We're going to build your emergency fund of three to six months of expenses. That's going to take you about four months is all. And then we're going to start baby step four, which is 15% of your income going into retirement, and everything else we can find we're going to throw at that house. Okay. Okay. And I think I'm at 8% into my retirement already. I forgot to mention that.
Starting point is 00:36:08 Yeah. That's already. You may want to stop that temporarily until you get that emergency fund rebuilt and then start it again at 15%. And that's household incomes. Your husband work? He is currently starting a second business. He's a retired teacher, and he's currently starting,
Starting point is 00:36:25 but that's not income, anything, expense or income at the moment. Okay. If it starts creating an income, 15% of your household income goes into retirement. That's what we call baby step four. That's when you're debt-free with an emergency fund. That's the first three steps. Then four is 15% of your income going into retirement. Everything above 15%.
Starting point is 00:36:45 And by the way, without this big stinking car payment and by living on a budget, you're going to have money above the 15% to go ahead and clear that mortgage off. Because in seven years, I want this house gone, our house debt gone. And when you move into retirement, you're going to have a healthy 401K, a healthy pension. He's going to have a business going, and you're going to have a paid-for house. That's where you want to be at retirement. Right. Yeah, he's going to have a business going, and you're going to have a paid-for house, that's where you want to be at retirement. Yep.
Starting point is 00:37:08 Right. Yeah, that's my goal. I have a money fear. I'm one of those people whose parents didn't do. They did everything I shouldn't do, so I have almost an irrational fear of not having money when I'm older. Well, the step that we gave you gives you both wealth and stability. Yes. Wealth is in the 401k.
Starting point is 00:37:27 Stability is in the paid-for house. Right. And the process I just gave you is the shortest distance between where you are and there. Okay. 15% into retirement after the truck's paid. Pay off the truck for sale. After the emergency fund's in place. After the emergency fund's back in place, okay.
Starting point is 00:37:48 Then 15% into retirement, and everything else we can squeeze out of the budget, we chunk on the house. How much do you owe on your home? $184,000. Yeah, it's probably going to be seven to nine years before you're done. You may not have it done in seven years, but you're going to be seven to nine years before you're done. Yeah. You may not have it done in seven years, but you're going to be close. Depending on if your husband starts adding some income to the equation or not. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:12 If he starts adding income to the equation, you start throwing it at that. And don't allow your fear, Tracy, to prevent you from getting to your purpose. As far as not your purpose, but your future. Pay off the car today. All right? Pay it off today today and you'll get closer and closer and closer to your dream i think you can do it within seven to eight years but the numbers do show seven to nine but i think if you and your husband really sit down get on a
Starting point is 00:38:34 clear budget i think you can be there within seven years twenty five thousand dollars is eight years out of a hundred so you can do it faster than that, probably. You probably can do it in... Because the income should go up with the business. Yeah. I think you're going to be done in seven years if you stay concentrating on it. Right. I mean, you don't have to live on beans and rice to do it, but I think you're just going to pay attention.
Starting point is 00:38:57 Just be very intentional with your money. Hang on. I'm going to send you a copy of the book, The Total Money Makeover, which outlines those baby steps that we were using in detail. It's like the baby steps on steroids. That's what the book is, and it's the best-selling book we've ever done because of that, because it gives everybody a clear path of exactly what to do here, what to do there, what to do there, and what to do there. That's simple.
Starting point is 00:39:18 And so very, very cool. Good stuff. We appreciate you calling in. All right, Anthony, that about puts another hour down. Well done. Another hour. It's been fun, Dave. I like rocking with you, man.
Starting point is 00:39:29 Well done. James Childs is our producer. Kelly Daniel is our associate producer. I'm Dave Ramsey, your host. This is The Ramsey Show. Did you know that over 16 million people listen to The Ramsey Show every week? And a lot of those people listen on one of our 600 plus radio stations across the country. To find a station near you, head to DaveRamsey.com slash show.

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