The Ramsey Show - App - How Do I Fix My Relationship With Money? (Hour 1)

Episode Date: May 27, 2024

Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, it's the Ramsey Show, where debt is done, cash is king, and the paid-off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW as the status symbol of choice. We help people actually build wealth, actually do work that they love, and actually create amazing relationships. Rachel Cruz, number one best-selling author and Ramsey personality, and my daughter is with me today as a co-host. We'll be taking your questions about your life

and your money. The phone number is free. Some say the advice is worth what you pay for it. 888-825-5225. That's 888-825-5225. Looks like Mario's going to start us off this hour, and he is in Atlanta. Hey, Mario, how are you? I'm doing better than I deserve, as you would say, Dave. I'm doing great. Glad to be on the show. We're honored to have you, sir. How can we help? So the big point is I'm fairly new. I'm not new to you, but fairly new to the show, and I'm really on fire and on board about just becoming financially free, debt free. The teachings that you and your team teach are phenomenal. And my big question is, I want to know the best way to get my wife on board with implementing some of the drastic changes that we would need to make in order to get to that point. I make a pretty good, I have a strong income.

I know all of our debt areas. I know the areas where I feel like we're spending too much or overindulging, but I know that I'm going to get some resistance with the changes that we're going to need to make in order to get to where I know that we can get to. Give me an example of one of the changes that you think you need to make that you think you're going to get resistance on. Some areas of convenience, like going out to eat a lot or ordering food. How much debt have you got?

A lot of, including house. No, not including house. Okay. Credit card debt, I'm at about $15,000 credit card debt. Uh, student loans total, um, around 75,000. Um, and I have one car that's not, I have one car that's not completely paid off. And I think we owe 12,000 on that car. And what's your household income?

$175,000. Okay, that's a great income. So Mario, what's causing you to believe that she's going to have a hard time with all of this? Is it comments she's made? Is it something that in your head you just know her and

you know what's going to be coming? Has she given you clues on it? Oh, I have proof. Oh, yeah. I have proof. Yeah, absolutely. Comments she's made. There's other things that I've implemented.

So why? So then for her in these conversations, what are her hesitations? A lot of it has to do with our kids. Okay. a lot of it has to do with our kids okay okay um so like for instance um i'll say okay hey we've completely paid off this particular credit card we're not going to use it we're going to put it up interest rate is high on this thing it doesn't make sense i'm paying somebody to borrow from my future self you know i do all of that and she's like great sounds good uh but then time will go on and how she charges

on the credit card and then when i say hey what happened here why did this take place and it was like oh i had to do this i had to make this decision and do this and you know yeah and so it's just kind of like you know these things you know a lot of times it's with the girls yes you know my kids sure and and it's life right because. Yes. You know, my kids. Sure. And it's life, right? Because you guys have not put systems in place for life to look different. So you're still keeping the credit card. We're going to put this credit card over here. We shouldn't touch it, but it's still there.

Get rid of it. Get rid of it. Do you guys have a written budget that you have together sharing an account saying, Hey, here's the line item for the kids. This is what we're going to spend saying hey here's here's the line item for the kids this is what we're going to spend on the kids here's the line item for you me food out to eat clothes here's where every single dollar this month is going i've done all of that no have you guys together no mario have you guys together done that we have we done that or have you done that? So I have done it and I've shared it and it's communicated. This looks good.

I'm on board. Let's do it. Let's run this plan and we'll start running the plan. And OK, totally. So, Mario, I also think I'm sure Ramsey has become a cuss word in your house because a little bit of me, I'm fearful that you're using this against her. I don't believe your wife is malicious. I think she's a great mom, probably a great wife. And so so these things, life is just happening to her.

And she's reacting, obviously not in the way that you prefer or that even what we would teach. Right. She's going charging the credit card. But it's not malicious. And so I think that there needs to be a higher level conversation to say, okay, you and I together as a couple, where do we want to be? What do we want life to look like in five years?

What do we want? What is our why? Like, does she have any level of pain or stress around money? Is she worried in any way like i want you guys to yeah i me me for the most part i am just because the weights i don't want to have to work until i retire 100 and right now i'm the i'm the listen listen she's a homemaker you're treating her like she's your teenage daughter she's not a partner and she's not a partner in

any of this you're just bringing the budget and laying it down giving some instructions about a credit card and then you're shocked that she didn't do what you told her to do uh she's not a partner right that's right you need to get above this and the two of you need to sit down with the kids away or the kids in bed and say we have a hundred and two thousand dollars in debt we make 175,000 dollars that makes us stupid people we need to change some stuff here we're broke and we make 175,000 a year we have got to as a couple aim at something bigger than kids clothes lord jesus really yeah okay and so we've got to have a big plan that we're going at now honey he feel it and i know i know i know but this is him and his wife talking okay yes we have

to get on the same page i do not want to be your daddy i don't want to be your daddy i i i want to be your husband i need i need like a grown woman beside me helping me make decisions about our future. And she needs an input in all of that, too. And then she gets input. That she gets to say. And then, by God, when she gives input, it's a contract. Yes. Yes.

But she has no reason. She has no contract with you now because you dictated it to her and walked away. And then we're shocked that she went and bought kids clothes on a credit card. Because she had no buy-in. She had no buy-in she had no buy-in none whatsoever she didn't have a voice in this and she has no belief in the overall vision she was just going along with you yes and i would say this too just as an encouragement mario that the conversations that i feel like winston and i the best conversations we have around money is not really even about money it's more like hey let's just dream and in five years what do we want our lives is not really even about money. It's more like, hey, let's just dream. And in five years,

what do we want our lives to look like? How old are the girls going to be? What kind of car do we want to drive? What vacations do we take? What do we want to be giving to? Allow your numbers then to motivate you to your goals together as a couple, where you guys both want to go. And then the day-to-day plays into that.

But kind of, there's a... I'm looking at her and I'm going, I make $175,000 a year. I'm really not okay with us being broke. I think that's fair. It's just crazy. But also, there's a level... Yes, I know. But there's also a level marriage-wise to get above it to have a conversation.

I think it's all of that. I think it's every bit of that. But I think you've got to say, look, we're sloppy. We're disorganized. We're fat.ized yes yes we're fat and we need to what can we do to help you what can we do together to fix this retro cruise ramsey personality is my co-host today parents if you've got school-aged kids the last thing you want is for them to be normal adults, broke.

You want them to be weird, not broke, like you. And that's why you've already got them listening to the Ramsey Show in the backseat of your car, all that kind of stuff. We're 100% on board with that. We've got tons of stuff to help you and your kids' teachers packed into our back-to-school sale. One of the biggest challenges teachers face is getting students to actually engage in classroom conversations. Dr. John Deloney created classroom editions of his Questions for Human cards. They're made for elementary, middle, and high school kids. Help them build lifelong friendships and re-heal conversations.

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We're all there to help you at RamseySolutions.com. Evan's with us in Winston-Salem. Hi, Evan. Welcome to the Ramsey Show. Hi, Dave. How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up?

Well, me and my wife, we're on baby step 3B trying to save for a house, and we've got a chance to buy a house from a family member. She's my wife's cousin, and not really like a close family member, but they're offering it to us at 3.5% interest on a 15-year fixed rate owner financing. And I've called around to the bank. The best that I can do is probably around four or a little over four.

And so me and my wife, we're longtime listeners, and we just wasn't sure about owner finance center, if that was a safe thing to do. Owner financing is as safe as anything else. If you have a good attorney, draft the documents. It's not a land contract. It's an actual mortgage, and the deed of the house goes into your name. Yes.

Okay. No land contracts at all. We don't do those okay now the downside of the whole scenario you're giving the the other upside is you're going to have a lot less costs involved closing costs other things that you're going to not have with owner financing so that part's all wonderful uh how often do you have dinner with this cousin? This is the first time that we've spoken to them, and probably at their wedding about 10 years ago, maybe. Okay, so you never see them. You're not mad at them, but it's not a relationship you have. No, it's just not one that we have.

Okay, because here's the thing. It's going to affect whatever relationship you have. The borrower is slave to the lender. When you borrow money from someone, you change your relationship from cousin to master. Yep. Okay? And so if your father-in-law loans you this money,

I would tell you no, because Thanksgiving dinner tastes different when you eat with your master. It will change the tone the relationship of your between you and your wife your her dad all that kind of stuff never do that one but this one is really there's not much of a relationship here this is almost like a stranger yes and so i'm probably doing it. Okay. I agree. It's another one, Evan, in most of the calls, though, when it comes to borrowing money from family, it's just an absolute no.

But there's these exceptions like this. This is so distant. Yeah, where it's so distant and it's like you're not going to be with them. You're not seeing them every day. You guys aren't chatting and talking. And there's not really much of a relationship to hinder because there's not much of a relationship. So, so in that makes. Nobody's mad. We're not saying that.

No, no, no. But it's just a, you know, the thing is, if it absolutely completely went bad and went sideways and everybody was mad, it really wouldn't change your life. Right. Yeah. And we're not calling that. We're not saying it's going to happen but the the point being that you know if you borrow from your father-in-law that that you lose that relationship now you've lost a sibling or an in-law i mean somebody

spending time with yeah but um like rachel's got cousins that she actually has really tight relationships with right that you would not do this you would not do this deal with them not a chance i'm not changing because i'm telling you man the old joke is if you loan your brother in law a hundred dollars and he never speaks to you again was it worth it right i mean you know so because it does change the relationship when you loan or borrow money it just does so but the point being here is there's not much of a relationship to change so that that's i'm doing it because it's a cheaper interest rate, saves money. Make sure you have an attorney close the deal like you would any other professional transaction.

Get title insurance. Get an inspection on the house. Get an appraisal on the house. All of those kinds of things you would do if you were doing a normal transaction to where no one's getting screwed here. No one's. It's all very business like and button up all the documents are done they're properly filed at the courthouse a title company does the closing you do everything right here if you do all that right you're going to

have lowered cost and lowered interest rate and it's a good deal go get it there you go matthew's with us in tulsa oklahoma hi, Matthew. How are you? Great. How are you guys doing? Better than we deserve. What's up? I've just got kind of a career question, but I was going to give you a rundown of myself and my wife's financials first. We're both self-employed, no debt other than our home.

I make about $120. She makes about $60. We owe $160 on our home. It's worth about three, 305. Um, and I actually sell real estate, really looking forward to the reality check. Um, and I'm just curious, should I take the chance because I have an opportunity to start my own brokerage, but should I take that chance with a baby on the way with all the risks that we know come with starting your own company so you're a real estate broker now making 120 000 a year i'm an agent yes i'm getting my license shortly yes okay how long you've been selling real estate a little over a year okay'm 22. My wife's 22 also.

Okay. I was doing the same thing you're doing when I was your age, and I got my real estate license when I was 18. Okay. So I know what you're facing. One of the things you're facing is it's tough to have credibility with people to sell them houses when you're only 22, right? Mm-hmm.

Yeah. You've got an uphill battle there. And having your own brokerage would probably help with that a little, or it might scare them even more. Well, see, I feel like I don't have as much of a problem with customers as I would with people working under me who have been doing it 20 years and think. For how young you are. Right.

From like a leadership perspective, respected right yeah and just with a kid doing october it's like do we take this chance when we're sitting pretty good right now yeah and we've got a real estate market that is um twisting and turning in the wind it's very unpredictable right now uh i i i think the market's going to slow down i don't think house prices are going to go down we've already said that out loud but i think it's going to slow down so my yeah my only concern would be matthew you got into the real estate business in the best time ever so like what you made then not saying you can't make that again by any means but it was probably easier to make what you made then then it's going to be easier to make that same amount in the next coming years

because of the slowing and softening of the market. What's your wife say? She says do it because it's a pretty good option. I mean, it's a pretty good opportunity with a business partner who has a very good in. I'm sorry, a business partner? That's new information. Yeah, I would be opening it with a partner. No, don't do that.

Oh, really? No. You're already married. Yeah. All right. Listen, the only ship on sale is a partnership. The number of small business partnerships that survive one decade is very close to zero. Almost none of them do.

We work with entree leadership businesses tens of thousands of them and have for decades all across america and one of the biggest problems they have is a stinking partnership it's gone sideways now the exception is medical partnerships and law partnerships but they're structured differently anyway it's a whole different set up but two guys opening a real estate company two guys opening up a uh heat and air company two women open up a nail salon this is just a it's just an it didn't know no no no no you don't you don't need a partner uh okay so what i what i'm going to tell you is is scary for me to tell you because i believe in getting after it when you're young and you're an

ambitious and smart young guy and i hate to tell you not to do something but while you get another 18 months is going to give you a lot of information about life a lot of perspective especially if it's your first baby too there's just a lot of change let the baby get born let's get past some of this rough patch in the real estate let's see what's going on you save up you open up with your money doesn't cost that much to open up a brokerage firm if you open it up on your 25 instead of your 22 you're going to be just fine and um little patience yeah i think it's gonna be good for you rachel cruz ramsey personalities my co-host today emma is in pittsburgh hi emma welcome to the ramsey Show. Hi, Dave.

Thanks for taking my call. Sure. What's up? Okay. So my husband and I used to own a bunch of rental properties, and we ended up going bankrupt because we listened. We had your book and somebody else's book, and the other person's book said it was okay to have debt whenever you're renting.

We ended up being over $100,000 worth of credit card debt, you know, just because things were breaking in all of the houses. Yeah. And you had no margin because you put nothing down. Yeah. Right. And we have a family of six. So there was a lot of mouths to feed and I had some health issues and I was homeschooling those four kids. So there was a lot of mouths to feed, and I had some health issues, and I was homeschooling those four kids, so there was only one income. And y'all lost all that. We did lose all of it, yes. When was that, Emma? That was 2017. Yeah, me too. It was 1988. Yeah. Okay. Well, we got out of that, got to the point where we could buy another house. And now as I speak, we've got $16,500 worth of credit card debt, which I'm trying to pay that down. I've got a spreadsheet where we're down $3,538 in the last six months.

Okay. But still, the total debt is, with a $5,000 balance on a car, is $223,480. That counts your house? Yes. How much is that your house? I mean, that's all your house except for you've got the little credit card debt. You've got $20,000 plus your house, right? Yeah, that's about it.

And what's your household income? It's right now sitting at $95,000. So what's your question? So my question is I'm finding my emotional relationship with money is bad. You know, the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil. I hate money. I get it. You are avoiding evil.

It's a spiritual stance on Emma's part. Honestly, my, I have, I have some family issues where my one family member has a lot of money and he is not a really nice person he uses it to manipulate people and yeah so i don't want to be like him well money doesn't money didn't make him that way money exposed the fact that he is that way all money does is all money does is magnify okay if you're a jerk and you get money you're big jerk if you're crazy and you get money big lots of crazy okay if you're if you're kind of compassionate and generous and you get money you're what we call a philanthropist

like you change whole worlds because you give so much so you know it's not money it's just you just got a jerk in the family well welcome to being in a family okay so you but you've had so you have a negative relationship with money is what you're trying to say i'm not making fun of that i'm just laughing with you because you're funny i like you okay so and so it's caused a lot of pain em with you because you're funny. I like you. Okay. And so it's caused a lot of pain, Emma, is what you're saying. Money is a place. And you don't feel like you have a good handle on it because you guys have this credit card debt.

And you just think, oh, my gosh, I just feel like I have no control over this part of my life. It doesn't feel safe. I've already proved that by going bankrupt once. Yeah. I did, too. And so, yeah, then you've got got to decide am I going to happen to this money subject or is it going to happen to me and what's what's going on is it's been happening to you yeah and I think understanding Emma it's not just the money part I mean I think the money exposes some things but I think I wrote a book called know yourself know your money and I'll

give you a copy of that yeah that book is perfect this. But it's to understand why do I handle money the way I do? And I think for you, Emma, I think it's some good kind of questions to ask yourself, everything from how you were raised, what kind of, you know, tension was money in the household, what kind of value did your parents place on it, and kind of walking through that, understanding your tendencies, you know, are you more of a spender or a saver? Are you more scarcity mindset or abundance? What's your biggest fear? A lot of people are driven by fear. They don't want to end up how they grew up. A lot of people have that fear. So they'll swing the pendulum so far where they save so much because they don't want to be poor like they were growing up and they saw the hardship or whatever it is right so everyone has their own their own stuff so that plus emma being married you haven't you have a spouse that has the all different factors of

everything we just listed and so working together and all of that can create yeah just a lot of a lot of tension a lot of stuff that combined with the failure on the other part yeah and with a house full of kids a homeschool all of those things combine to uh take away your confidence and your power yeah your emotional power over money does that sound does that sound right yeah that sounds yeah perfectly are you guys emma um you and your husband do you guys do a monthly budget we look at money we look at the debt together yeah and we're trying to get that number down i'm going to pile you on with some stuff i'm going to give you every dollar a premium okay as well in this call because i think one of the things that can feel so out of control

and people do this a lot emma so i'm not picking on you but they're like oh yeah i just have kind of all the expenses in my head and it's's just like, it's this imaginary thing that can suddenly become very isolating. It can be very scary when you don't see the facts. And Dr. John Deloney talks about this all the time, that facts are your friends. And I think a budget, honestly, working in that and seeing, okay, here's our income that's coming in, because you guys make a great income, 95 grand, you're doing great. But to be able to say, here's the plan for that and then for you over the course of time and i bet you if you guys start that this month i bet by january february

there's going to be a level of confidence over this emma because because you're going to learn how to live within boundaries and make different decisions and you're going to be at the grocery store and be like okay we got 200 bucks this week and i can spend that and i don't have to worry yeah and what what do i have to what do i have to spend to stay within that and it's this practice of discipline and being in control of what the that's what the budget does and i think that really will give you guys a sense of a sense of confidence too i think the 3500 in debt that you paid off is absolutely amazing because you've been beating it with a hammer not slicing it with a sharp knife and rachel just gave you a sharp knife it's going to go a lot easier you just beat the heck out of it yeah you just beat the snot out of it this 3500 was heavy lifting you gutted that

out girl because you didn't have it you didn't have a sharp knife you're just wailing on it with a club you guys should also know that most of my children are six foot tall and our food budget is $1,600 a month. So, that's okay. That doesn't mean you can't get control of money.

Okay. I know there's places, I know there's other places I can cut spending. You don't even know where your spending is because you don't have it all written out. Right. Every stinking detail. You will be amazed. You and your husband sit down and look at where every single dollar is going before the month begins

and give every dollar an assignment. That's why we call the app EveryDollar because you're giving every dollar a mission, okay? And when you do that, you're both going to go, where the crap have we been doing? And try this, you know, $1,600, that's before a budget. Try $1,400 for the month, right? Like you start practicing this like ebb and flow and see, okay, where can we get an extra hundred, few hundred dollars here or there?

I mean, like it's amazing the power that that really does give you and to be able to cut stuff. But honestly, I think for you guys getting some quick wins, cause I think it's, I think you said him confident that it took six months to pay off 3,500 that. So I want you to do that even faster. Oh,

you're going to do it a lot faster cause you're going to have a sharp knife instead of a club. You're going to have that. So I think that's going to start to give you guys confidence. Um, but I think it's just rewiring these habits and it takes time, but you're not a failure, Emma.

And that's the other thing is that this people equate their net worth or their money mistakes to who they are and that's when they talk about shame that shame is your identity so so take those apart that you are not the past mistakes that you've made you are not your net worth that is not who you are emma and so there's a a level there that i want want you to release that because that stuff will follow you and those lies will just play a tape in your head that you don't need. Yeah, you're doing better than you think you are, especially considering how blunt the instrument is you're using. Yeah, but stay on the line, Emma, because Austin, I want to give her Know Yourself, Know Your Money and Every Dollar Premium. You're going to love that book, Emma, because it's exactly talking about you. It's the number one bestseller, and you don't want to miss it.

It's Know Yourself, Know Your Money by Rachel Cruz. And it's not only family history, but your tendency, scarcity, abundance, all that stuff. It's brilliantly done. You will love it, and we'll put you in the Every Dollar budgeting app, and that will change everything. You and your husband do that together, and turn off the stupid TV and tell the six-footers to go in the other room. We're working on the budget. This is The Ramsey Show. Rachel Cruz, Ramsey personality, is my co-host today.

Open phones here at 888-825-5225. Hey, if you're brand new to this show, and a whole bunch of you are, based on our ratings increases and our ranking increases and so forth, we appreciate all of you being here. And, of course, if you're hearing stuff like baby steps and debt snowballs and you don't know what all that means, you want to get plugged in, go to RamseySolutions.com for free and click on the Get Started button. When you click the Get Started button, it'll help you figure out where you are and what your next steps are, and you'll start to learn the lingo of the stuff

we're talking about and figure out how you can best apply some of this and start to change your life. So, hey, that's what we're here for. The phone number here, 888-825-5225. Brian's in New York City. Hey, Brian, how are you? Hey, Dave, Rachel. Pleasure to speak with you.

Thanks for taking the call. Sure. What's up? So my wife and I are out of debt. We built up our fully funded emergency fund, and we're in baby step 3B. We are currently renting. We're about an hour away from the city so um and we commute into the city to work and we're trying to save up for a down payment and we're doing we're trying to cut corners and take every step we can to um increase the amount that we can save each month. And I'm just wondering if I should

change my retirement down to zero and what my wife should do with her percentage at work. Currently, I'm working part-time and I'm also staying at home with the kids. So we're cutting out childcare there. And she works as a nurse manager and full time. And her job has a 4% match at 50%. I mean, I'm sorry, 50% match. And she currently has it at 4%. So I'm just not sure what we should be doing to try to get the most amount possible and just try and figure out ways to... Yeah, have you guys kind of done a timeline, Brian, to say, hey, if she does pause, because I would encourage you guys to pause

for a period of time while you're saving just to increase the cash flow, like what you mentioned. Do you know how long it would take you guys to save up a down payment if you guys paused all retirement and threw all the extra money you guys have per month? It's probably going to be a couple years. Currently, we have $6,000 down payment and we have $5,000 in a car fund. And I guess if need be, we can

combine them. But yeah, to get a good down payment, especially in this area, it's going to take a couple years at least. How old are you? I am 31, and my wife's birthday is actually today, and she is not going to say. So if you started saving for retirement at 15% of your household income, beginning at age 33, you would retire a multimillionaire. Okay. And so if you take two years off and save up a down payment and then you start, the trick is don't take two years off and then keep spending like you're in Congress. You don't need to be going out to eat. We're saving for a house. We don't need two years off and then keep spending like you're in Congress.

You don't need to be going out to eat. We're saving for a house. We don't need to be going on vacation. We're saving for a house. We're saving for a house. We're sacrificing the match. We're sacrificing the compound interest. We're sacrificing our investments to get a house.

So, by God, let's get the house. Don't screw around the edges of this. You see what I'm saying? Mm-hmm. You've got to play through for this to make sense. If you just stop retirement and then you lollygag along for five years, this is not good. Okay, so you're thinking somewhere in the range of one to three years?

Yes. Yeah, three years would be the max I would be unplugged. And so you've got to set yourself a goal and say, how much have we got to save a month to be there, and what have we got to do to make that happen? And that may be working extra, that may be cutting other things, there may be other things involved, but you've got to set this as a detailed thing. Because the danger of some of the stuff that we teach is if you don't do it all it'll leave you hanging because we tell you to stop retirement and you

know get out of debt but if you don't go get out of debt then you and you never start retirement again in your case you've got your emergency fund I'm trying to I'm gonna I'm gonna really enhance this 3b because this is an expensive area. I need some down payment money. Yeah. And Brian too, we, for first-time homebuyers, because you said you're renting, you know, we say anywhere from five to 10% for a down payment. So be, you know, looking on that side so that you guys can press play back into retirement. And then you're on baby steps four, five, and six, and then you're throwing extra money that you guys have at the house. But yeah. We love 20% down because you avoid PMI, but for a first-time homebuyer getting out, Rachel's right.

Let's get the deal done. And 5%, 10% down, something like that, you're going to have some PMI, but get her done and then get that retirement going and then get that mortgage paid down and get rid of that PMI. That would be your next thing. Arthur's in Richmond, Virginia. Hey, Arthur, how are you? I'm good. How are you guys doing? Better than we deserve. What's up?

So I had a question. I've seen you guys give some career advice. I want to ask you, I am in a job right now, and I don't think my boss is very good at doing his boss job. And so I'm wondering, I really have some, one main question is how do I, when do I know how bad it has to get before I leave? And then also maybe doing things that I know aren't, aren't useful to his, to the people under him, including myself, when do, and things that I just think are wrong. When do I, when would I go to his boss and, um, kind of report things? I don't want to obviously stir the pot and, um, kind of report things? I don't want to obviously stir the pot and just like start fights at work with, with

his boss about it or, or, um, cause problems at work. But, um, I just don't know, like, when is, when is the right time to go to his boss about things that he's doing or lack of, or not doing? And, um, when would I know it's just time to move on and go to a different company? Arthur, is it, is it, is it any of it moral issues or is it more just leadership style? Like he's not engaged where he should be and he's not communicating. Is it more of those kind of attributes or is there stuff going on that you're like, that's flat out wrong, borderline immoral?

So leadership style, I can get over. But like one is competency in leadership. Like I'm a salesperson. I've been number one in my company for the past five months. And, um, some of the advice he gives me, I'm just like, yeah, I would never do that. Like, I don't, I don't understand where you're getting this advice. And I don't believe he has the experience to back up his, like, his role as also a teaching manager, um, in sales. And then how long have you been there five months i've been there about six months how old are you i'm 26 how old is he oh gosh like 50 something okay so what do you think

the probability that you talking to his boss is going to fix all this? I don't know. I don't know because his boss does ask me questions about him, and I'll give him honest feedback. I don't know what it's going to change, honestly. I really don't. Well, I mean, there's two possibilities. One is realistic. One is not.

One possibility is they move him on. They fire him because he can't do his his job and their number one sales guy is talking to leadership about that okay um that that's a possibility that's reasonable the possibility that this 55 year old guy who is not competent suddenly becomes competent because you talk to his boss is precisely zero okay think about it they can't train him up on the things he's doing in a short period of time these are long pattern things that have to be fixed so you're either going to endure him while he's growing uh which is really doubtful or he's going to be removed um or you're going to be labeled and

you'll be gone right that's something i'm worried about well i wouldn't be worried about it you're going to quit anyway so what's it matter so that's i guess the other question then in terms of quitting um like so i don't know like it's good money and i'm making good money and i'm happy in that sense but it's just it's a mess all the time with like you know management so i don't know i don't know what point i should leave because i'm not growing personally except things i learned on my own uh but i'm not learning from the company anymore so okay i don't know when oh i i would i would have i would have something else in place arthur before you go in and just quit though right because there's sales jobs everywhere if you're a great salesperson

you can find a lot of things to sell and find good culture in other companies it doesn't sound like it's a great culture i think you've lost faith in the entire organization not just this one guy and it's probably time for you to go get something else which thankfully your your skill set is very broad right arthur so i think you could kill it a lot for you to go get something else. Which thankfully, your skill set is very broad, right, Arthur? So I think you could kill it a lot of places. Go get something else. And then be aware that you might be 26 and after six months you don't know it all. That's possible too.

Yes, I thought about that too, Arthur. A little humility. Just remember that. This is The Ramsey Show. Hey, it's Rachel Cruz. If you love the show and want a deeper dive on your money journey, Just remember that. This is The Ramsey Show. Hey, it's Rachel Cruz. If you love the show and want a deeper dive on your money journey, we have a weekly newsletter that gives you trending and helpful articles and tips on following the Ramsey way. Just go to ramseysolutions.com today to sign up for our newsletter.

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