The Ramsey Show - App - How Do I Pay Off My Debt More Quickly? (Hour 1)

Episode Date: November 27, 2023

🎵 What up, what up? Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, it's the Ramsey Show, where we help people build wealth, get out of debt, do work that they actually care about, and learn to have great relationships. I'm John Deloney, joined here by about-to-be best-selling author George Campbell. And we're taking your calls on money, life, relationships, work, all of it. 888-825-5225.

It's 888-825-5225. Hopefully, it's lunch after the Monday after Thanksgiving. So hopefully your blood sugar has restabilized. Your head isn't just asleep on your desk and you are with us. George, you're talking to yourself, John. Let's be honest. I am talking to myself. Let's go out to Lonnie in Athens, Georgia.

What's up, Lonnie? Hi, how are y'all? Could not be better. What's up, Lonnie? Hi, how are y'all? Could not be better. What's up? So our situation, I have a 23-year-old stepson that's on his second senior year, two more senior years left to go to get a general business degree. And my husband pays tuition, rent, utilities, truck, everything for him. So

when he does graduate, he has stated that he doesn't want to get a job. He doesn't want to be an adult, you know, doesn't want to do anything except for basically live off my husband. Lonnie, Lonnie, Lonnie, why in the world would he want to get a job? He has it made. He's got the perfect life. Exactly. Well, that's what I tell my husband. I'm like, why would he?

If you're going to pay for everything, I mean. Well, it's not the paying for everything. Some people are able to bless their kids. That's fine. It's the way in which that blessing is becoming a curse. That's what I'm thinking. There's no accountability with it. It's an ATM machine with an endless donor.

Yes. And I'm on board with paying for tuition for his school. I feel like after five years, we should stop. And if he needs two more years because he messed around and lived his best life for a few years, I feel like that should be on him, that we shouldn't be on the hook, you know, seven years for a general business bachelor's degree. Hey, Lonnie, your conversation is not with your stepson. Your conversation is with your husband. Yes, and he is not on board.

But here's what, hold on, don't miss what I'm trying to say. Your anger and frustration should be with your husband, and you are not, you're refusing to have that interaction and so you're deflecting it on this 23-year-old kid. It's not the 23-year-old kid's fault. He's just been doing exactly what life has presented him. As my friend Henry Cloud says, he needs some problems like rent and truck payments and insurance,

but he's never had those because of your husband, not because of something that's wrong with your 23 year old. Right. So how do I try to get my husband on board? Because, you know, I've had the discussion many times and his response is, you know, it's my money. I can do whatever I want. You know, if we want to pay for his school. That's one problem, this idea that it's all my money, and so you don't get a vote in what I do with my money. The other problem is it sounds like he's been trying to buy his son's love

for a long time now. And if he doesn't have this anymore, the relationship will need some actual repair. Yes, that is true. So that's what's lying underneath all of this that I can smell a mile away, but the conversation he needs to have with his son is, hey, I've been doing a really terrible job raising you into the man that I want you to be and that you need to be, and so this looks like new boundaries, new rules as for how this is going to happen.

You're going to finish school in two years or else I'm not paying for it. You're going to now take over the truck payment and get a part-time job. And guess what? The son's not going to like that, is he? No. But that's between them at that point, isn't it? Yes. You need to put the ball back in his court and he needs to be a man and be a husband

and it needs to be our money, which means you get a vote. That's what he signed up for when he married you, isn't it? Yes, that is correct. So here's the conversation. It is not, I can't believe you're giving this kid money. I can't believe you're doing that. You know, you're doing this, you know, you're doing this. Because when you come at him with a bunch of accusations, he has to defend himself. That's just human nature. He doesn't have to. He could curl up in a ball, but he's got to defend himself. And if you can look back at your series of actions, they haven't worked, have they? It's just nagging him about this working. No, it's not. So let's do something different. Let's take him out. How long have y'all been married?

Two years. Okay, let's take them out and say two years ago, we both said, I do. And my money and my heart and my life became yours. And your money and your life and your heart became mine. And when you say things like, it's my money, I can do whatever I want, it scares me to death and I can't breathe because I feel like I'm hanging out here all by myself, like you're renting me. And it either has to be all of us or we have to have a much harder conversation because two years into marriage, this isn't a marriage. This is just a really sophisticated roommate situation.

You see how one is you telling him how you feel, how scared you are, how his actions affect you, and the other is you just nagging him and throwing things at him. One is an invitation to a conversation, a hard one. The other is I'm throwing stuff at you. Now I'm going to throw stuff at you. Now I'm going to throw stuff at you.

And then you get mad and walk away. Third or fourth down the list, we'll get to talking about how he's funding his son's immaturity with no end in sight. But that's not the first conversation. The first conversation is your marriage is not as strong as you think it is. And let's be super honest. There's other things going on besides this, isn't it?

Isn't there? No, actually, we have a wonderful marriage. It's just this is the only thing that we argue about. You just described a way in which it's not wonderful. And that is he has his stuff and you've got yours, which means you'll have a wonderful living arrangement. You don't have a wonderful marriage because wonderful marriage says, who are we going to be together?

And how are we going to move forward? Completely united, getting closer with every step we take into the future? Not, this is my crap, and that's your crap. See what I'm saying? Yes. That's the hard conversation to have. Do you have a good relationship with him, with the stepson?

Not really, because we really don't see him. You're trying to ruin his life, make him stepson? Not really. You're trying to ruin his life. Make him pay for his own truck. No. We only see him when he wants money or needs something from my husband. No, really? Right?

I think you try to invest in this relationship and you try to help him set some goals and dig in and make it more than just a transaction. I like that idea, George. Maybe you call him and take him to coffee. There's an option. Maybe you call him and say, hey, I just wanted to get to know you better. What if we started going to lunch together? I'll cover lunch. There you go. Yeah, I'll pay for lunch. Hey, marriage is not you do yours and I'll do mine. It's we will do ours, however complicated that is. 888-825-5225.

This is The Ramsey Show. 888-825-5225. This is The Ramsey Show. What do we got here? You know what day it is, John. What day is it? It's actually one of my favorite days of the year. As a guy who loves a deal, Cyber Monday is my Super Bowl.

I don't know anything about sports, but I know a lot about Cyber Monday. And, you know, I know you want to make a joke, John. Make it. Nope, I'm keeping it. Shopping is considered a sport in my household. That's the state of America. There it is. That's where we're at.

No, literally, on Thursday, my wife, she doesn't listen to this show. So she wanted a Roomba for Christmas. And so I ordered it on Thursday. And then I thought, I wonder if they'll have like a special thing on Monday. Why didn't you just text me, John? I could get you the best deal on a Roomba. I have my ways. Yeah, see, I just, you know what?

It wasn't worth, my time is valuable. Oh, I see. And it said like a Cyber Monday deal on Thursday or something like that. It always does. But here's the good news. Ramsey has an actual, we've got an actual one day Cyber Monday sale on our site, ramsaysolutions.com slash store. And it is our lowest prices of the year today only.

This isn't like Amazon where they just mark up the MSRP and it's like 70% off and it's the same price it always is. This is actually the best deal of the year is our Cyber Monday sale. So you can get great gifts for family and friends for as low as five bucks, including audio books. And for the first time, Building a Non-Anxious Life, John's new audio book is 10 bucks for the first time ever.

Yeah, what are they doing there? 10 bucks, it's amazing. Supposed to sit for a year before they knew that. Yeah. Here we go. In Financial Peace University, our flagship money course is at the lowest price of the year

at just $59.99. We've got the 2024 Ramsey Gold Planner, just $40 on sale. And we've got Dr. John Deloney's in there, Rachel Cruz, Jade Warshaw. They're going to help you work on faith relationships and finances through their monthly teachings.

Rachel Cruz's new Navy wallet is on there. So you can go shop the one-day Cyber Monday sale, ramsaysolutions.com slash store. This is the time, John. This is the time. Don't miss it. You're not buying anything today, are you? I hadn't thought to.

You already bought the Roomba. I'm going to buy some stuff today in honor of George Campbell. You should go to the ramsaysolutions.com slash store and pre-order my new book, John. That would mean the world mean the world i've already i already have that tattooed on my arm like like honestly you have worse tattoos so i they wouldn't shock me let's go to steve in las vegas and see what's up steve what's up steve hey how you guys doing we're partying man what's up i'm not just uh i'm just calling in um just because back in june a month before my son was born my mom passed away i'm sorry man yeah she left me a life insurance benefit

you know a lot more than what i expected it was 143 000 like 40 000 but um i do have some debt and i was just i was kind of afraid to spend the money because of debt. It's something, I don't know, psychologically it's so hard to do because I want to buy a house in the near future. And my credit's not up to par and I want to get it back up to where it was. But I'm just afraid of using that money to pay it off. For me, money is like, it feels like water. It just goes away so fast, more than what I make. What's your full financial picture?

What are you making right now? What's your income? Well, I just got back to my job in March. This is my third time being at the same job. But I would say about $3,100 per month, but it depends on if the month's good, the month before. The best month I had this year was like $6,000 for the month. Is this commissions, bonuses? Why'd you say you're

back for the third time? Well, because in 2020, at the end of 2020, we got all let go because the company was in bankruptcy due to COVID. And then four months later, came back when they reopened the store, got me hired. But then I stayed almost a year, and then four months later, came back when they reopened the store, got me hired. But then I stayed almost a year and then I quit in December for another job because I was just tired of it and it was inconsistent.

What do you do? Car sales, but it's kind of a rental company that sells cars. Oh, okay. Yeah. So hourly and commission. Yeah, I think when you did, if you're in that business,

you could be making way more money than that with more stability. And I encourage you to do that as part of this game plan. But how much debt do you have? About $52,000, including just a credit card for my wife. Okay, does your wife work outside the home? She does not because she takes care of our child. Okay. And we have another daughter also.

All right. What other debt do you have outside of the credit card? So I have, so my credit card, I had three credit cards. They all got closed back in 2022. And because I got, when I switched to my other job, I just, you know, I wasn't able to pay them. Got behind. And then I have my car loan, which I owe about 17.3. And then my personal loan for 12 grand and another one for 5,000. But they're all pretty much closed. The only thing that's

open is my car loan. And what's in collections right now? I believe it's the, I have two Chase credit cards and then a Wells Fargo credit card. I got a subpoena actually for that like a month after my baby was born. So I settled with them recently. I'm just trying to wait for them to send me paperwork to do that. That's pretty much all of it there.

Hey Steve, are you sick of this? Yes. Not sick of debtors calling you. Are you sick of being a man who keeps defaulting on his word yeah you know what I'm saying

yeah I guess have you ever dated somebody dated a woman who just kept cheating on you and you'd break up and then go back with her and then she'd cheat on you and you'd break up with her and go back with her no I've never been in that situation but you are with your professional life you and you'd break up with her and go back with her? No, never in that situation. But you are with your professional life. Why do you keep doing that with your job? All this is painting a picture of a guy who kind of walks around life with his head down.

And I would love to see a Steve who had his head held high. And was a guy who honored his word, a guy who worked hard and expected an employer to be equally as integrous and loyal and that they went and made a whole bunch of money together and helped a whole

bunch of people at the same time. But I can't want that more than you want. Do you want that? Does that even sound right? Yeah, of course. I mean, I would like that, obviously. I mean, I've had a rough couple of years after COVID, especially my mom dying. Yeah.

You've been hitting the mouth a bunch. And then all of a sudden, you got this gift. Yes. And so I don't want you to think of this as money. I want you to think of your mom's parting gift to you was freedom. Maybe for the first man in your family's generation, history, you're free. You can owe nobody anything.

And you can quit this crap and quit working for a crappy place that treats you bad. You can go get a job as a salesman, which hopefully you're good at and you can provide for your family, a life of integrity. Yes. You ready for that, Steve? We'll lay out the game plan if you're ready. I am. I know it's scary, but here's what this would look like. Let's say you have the $143,000, right, sitting in the bank. You paid off all $52,000 today. That leaves you with $91,000,

correct? Yes. Now we're going to sock away three to six months of expenses. Let's go six months because your job is volatile and you're a single income family. So what's six months of expenses for your house, ballpark? Six months, I would say about... $20,000? Yeah, I would say that. Okay. So let's say we put 20 grand aside in a high yield savings account and we don't touch that money unless there's a true emergency now you're your own credit card okay see what we're doing think about where you're at right now you have no debt payments and you've become your own bank you have 20 grand sitting there ready to protect you and you still have 71 000 left over to become a homeowner and do it the right way and start that down payment fund. Or we could let this money run like water through our hands,

like you mentioned, and we can go buy some toys and emotionally spend and put our family behind instead of ahead. Yeah. And that's what John's saying. This a gift this is a life raft this is a get out of jail free card but i want you to use it wisely and think about the legacy that your mom left and go what's the man i want to become what kind of family do we want to have what are what kind of where do we want to be five years from now 10 years from now i want you to have a paid for house and be investing for the future that's what want. And I want you to be working at a place that treats you with dignity and respect. That's what we want.

So go settle these debts. Pay it all off this week, man. Be done with it. And stay on the line. We're going to hook you up with Financial Peace University. All nine lessons and a year of EveryDollar app. The premium one. We're going to hook you up, okay? Thank you so much. If you don't use this,

phooey on you, dude. We will come find you in Las Vegas. That's me using my nice language. Okay? Honor your mother, pay off your debts, become a free man, and go make your legacy right.

This is The Ramsey Show. Welcome back. This is The Ramsey Show, 888-825-5225. 888-825-5225. 888-825-5225. We're taking your calls on money and life and work and relationships. I'm John Deloney, joined by George Campbell. Listen, if you are as frustrated as I am about the economic picture of the United States, it's a madhouse.

And every time they keep releasing more and more statistics about, we're, oh, trillions of dollars in student loan debt, and we're over a trillion dollars in credit card debt. And you just keep thinking to yourself, how do people keep living like this? Honestly, we find a lot. Either A, people don't care, but more than that, people don't know. They don't know any different. They've just been taught this over and over and over and over again. You got to care about your credit score. You got to get a car payment. You're always going to have a mortgage. All these things it's just the air we breathe. And instead of sitting at home and screaming and yelling at the computer screen or clenching your fist so tight when you drive, you're going to snap your

steering wheel in half. There is something you can do for your neighbors that costs you no dollars, nothing. It costs you about 10 seconds of your time. And you might roll your eyes and think this is cheesy, but if you like, or subscribe to the show, if you follow us on Instagram or on Tik TOK or on all the social media platforms, God help us all. If you subscribe to the show on YouTube, here's what it does. It puts the show up in the algorithm. So then when somebody types, how do I improve my credit score? A video of Dave Ramsey or George Campbell or Jade Warshaw talking about how ridiculous the credit score scam is. Or should I take out loans for my kid to go to college and Jade Warshaw or George Campbell or Rachel Cruz or Dave will pop up? How do I save my marriage? How do I talk to my spouse about money? A video from me and George might pop up. It's free. You don't have to do anything.

And it begins to circulate this information into the social media world. And it gets this information in front of people. We're bombarded by millions of people reaching out saying, we saw you on YouTube. We saw you on some social media platform. It's because folks like you who like and subscribe to the show. It's a simple way to dump this stuff into the public sphere and it costs you nothing. You don't have to buy anything. So help us out and help out more importantly, your neighbor by sharing the show, leaving a review, subscribing, all the things. All right, let's run out to Tulsa, Oklahoma and talk to Sky. What's up, Sky? I see what I did there. That was kind of funny. What's up, Skye? Hey, how are we doing, Skye?

I'm good. How are you? Good. What's happening? Yeah, so I just wanted to call in. I'm wanting help with my plan to pay off my debt faster and I was also wondering if I should put less in my 401k while doing so. That's a brilliant idea,

Skye. Are you new to our gang? Yeah. Awesome. Welcome. Welcome to the cult. George has the Kool-Aid for you. Let's do it. I got it.

So, yeah, what's causing you to go, hmm, maybe I should pause investing for a little while? Well, I've been listening to y'all for a little bit now, and I've heard one episode where you're telling them to stop putting in so much in their 401k while trying to pay off your debt. And I thought it might have been a good idea for me. I'm putting in 5% right now. What does that amount to, dollars-wise? Probably a month, like 160. So if I told you, hey, what if I gave you an extra $2,000 to get rid of debt this year? Would that help you? Yeah, yeah. And you'd get out of debt faster,

which gets you back to investing faster. And guess what? When you're back to investing, you're not going to be doing 5%. You're going to triple that up to 15% because you freed up something called margin in your budget by getting out of debt and freeing up those payments. So that's the tactical piece of it. But there's also a psychological, emotional piece, which is, oh my gosh, I'm missing out on the match. That's the one, right? I'm missing out on investing. I've been told you got to invest early. Why would you stop investing? Everyone's going to tell me I'm crazy. Everyone's broke. Everyone's in debt up to their eyeballs, wondering why they can't get ahead. And one of the reasons is they're doing too many things at once.

They're not making traction in any of the areas. Gotcha. And so pausing for a short time, how soon will you be out of debt? If you pause. Probably way sooner. A few months at least? I have 43 right now, 43,000. And few months at least? Right now I have like, I have 43 right now,

43,000. And what do you make? I make, my salary is like 51, but I probably take home, I waitress as well, so altogether I probably take home

45,000 a month. So the goal for you is to go, hey, I want to pay this off in two years. Is that a good goal? Yeah. So basic math says that's about 21,000 a year you have to go, hey, I want to pay this off in two years. Is that a good goal? Yeah.

So basic math says that's about $21,000 a year you have to pay down? Mm-hmm. So now we go, all right, how do I find a little under $2,000 a month in margin? That might mean cutting expenses, cutting subscriptions, increasing income, more waitressing. All of that will help you find that margin. And as you pay off debt, you're going to free up payments, which increases the margin. You're going to throw out the next smallest debt using the debt snowball. And that really helps, that helped me pay off my 40,000 years ago. Skies, when I made that goal and I went, all right, I need 2000. That's the magic number. How do I create $2,000 in margin every month? And then that was my next goal was side

hustles, Ubering, lifting, consulting, freelancing, eating lean cuisines when they were on sale, five for $10 so that I wouldn't be tempted to go out to eat because I had food at home. It's those kinds of micro decisions that add up to that big margin. Gotcha. So I've been like paying off my lowest account debt first because it's the highest interest. Do you think that's the best plan to do? Is that the snowball, basically? The debt snowball ignores interest rates. And it says, hey, just attack the smallest balance with a vengeance, make minimum payments on the rest, because that's going to give you

something called motivation, progress, momentum. Gotcha. So as you do that, you'll free up a payment payment you'll take that payment you freed up apply to the next debt and the next debt and i'm going to gift you one year financial peace university because this walks you through it beautifully and it helps dispel so many of the myths out there that might be holding you back while also motivating you to make some progress so hang on the line we'll gift you one year of that sky to give you all the info you need from our friends john dave rachel and myself all right let's run up to Chicago and talk to Andrew. Where is...

We lost Andrew. Oh, we just lost Andrew. All right, let's roll out to Atlanta and talk to John. What's up, John? Hey, good afternoon. How are you? Great. How are you? I'm trying to get off speakerphone here. Give me a sec. My phone is smothering.

There we go. I'm not there. Hey. I'm trying to be off speakerphone here. Give me a sec. My phone is smaller than... There we go. I'm not there. I'm trying to be a good Christian man. My daughter, my youngest daughter, moved to Denver earlier this year, and I've been having to monthly kind of help her out to make her in meetings. Okay, can I pause real quick? Can I pause real quick?

Sure. Yep. Let's change your language. You don't have to do anything. You've chosen to send her money and fund whatever world she's living in. Correct. I'm helping fund her lifestyle. Okay.

Cool. I'm reaching a point where I fear. I know that personally, when I was in my mid-20s, I was going nowhere, and I was in debt. And I chose to change my life, and I went back to school, and then I had a really successful career after that. And now at 63, I've been able to retire really based on concepts that Dave preaches. But it's hard as a father to go, you know what, I know after she pays rent at the end of this week, she doesn't have money for food for the rest of the week. How old is she? And I start feeling guilty, but I feel like i'm enabling her at the

same time there you go so um i want you to like tattoo this sentence on your chest and i didn't didn't originate with me i think it originated with bernie brown but um it comes from the somebody smarter than me when you're doing the right thing relationally, and the right thing right now is not to fund somebody's further spiraling into the ground. I want you to choose guilt over resentment every time. Okay? I'm writing this down. Choose guilt over resentment. Just because you feel quote-unquote bad doesn't mean it's not the right thing. Just because you feel guilty when she calls and says, but dad, she's a grownup.

She's choosing the job she has. She's choosing the apartment she lives in. She's choosing the state she lives. She's making a bunch of adult choices. And you feel guilty by not funding that. But here's what's happening. Every time she texts you, you're starting to resent it a little bit. You don't like her being an, you don't like being her ATM machine. You don't like the fact that you're projecting out because you know, 55 year

olds and 60 year olds who had everything paid for, and then suddenly they got cut off and you flew past them in the marketplace, didn't you? Yes. Yes. And so you're starting to feel the resentment build. The honorable thing here, I think, is to have a hard conversation with her and say, you got three months left. But dad, you got three months left. As my friend, Dr. Henry Cloud says, she needs some problems like rent, like insurance payments. She's going to have to learn to stand up on her own. You can scaffold for a while, but she's going to have to learn to stand up on her own. You can scaffold for a while, but she's going to have to become an adult.

And adulting is hard. This is The Ramsey Show. George Campbell has a brand new book coming out in January called Breaking Free From Broke. Pre-order today for only $20 and get $100 in free bonus items, including some special childhood drawings. George, I'm just kidding. You get George's newest talk, Show Me the Money,

exclusive access to online private event and Q&A with George. Are you going to be dancing at that event? We don't know. Oh, it's a secret. I like that. Audiobook, ebook, everything. Plus, every book includes a special offer to receive three months of the premium version of every dollar for free. George, give me a quick synopsis. You have to pitch this book in an elevator. The financial system is designed to keep us broke. It's not all our fault, but it's our responsibility to take

action. Not by our hand, but in our lap. Exactly. And you can rise above this broken system and opt out completely and live a life with more freedom, options, margin, and joy. That's it. So as what it appears is that the, you know, we looked last year during the holiday spending and we saw holiday spending went up a little bit and credit cards went up to credit card balances oh yeah we hit a trillion john and so it looked as though oh people aren't using credit cards for groceries they're looking at it to prop up a lifestyle and it looks like we are that party's coming to an end or people are starting to go oh well it's compounding because now auto loan debt is at an all-time high, surpassing student loans.

The student loan debacle still hasn't been solved. The housing market's out of control. Nobody's wanting to pay off a mortgage because they have a low interest rate. Our pet's heads are falling off. We're taking out HELOCs because we have equity in our home and this is the solution to all of our problems. We're robbing our 401ks left and right. And then we're wondering why the guy in the White House ruined our life

because it's all the inflation, John. The egg prices are out of control. Or we could go, I'm going to take control of that guy in the mirror and he's going to get on a budget and he's going to get out of debt and he's going to change his family tree and it's in my control and my power. That agency is like a superpower, John. It feels so good to just not have to wait for someone else to try to fix your life. I remember Jocko and I were doing an event together.

The Navy SEAL. What a flex, by the way. But he was talking about, hey, back in the end, I'll say the Middle Ages, you finished a war not when your tour was over, but when the war was over. And people left their family, particularly

men, would leave their families and go fight. And they came back when it was over, which might be years. It might be a long time. I think about the sacrifices made so that my family would be okay. My family's land that's been in my family for however many hundreds or thousands of years would remain. I'm going to go away and do whatever i have to do and when i fast forward to now and people are like well i don't want to take a second job or a third job because there's little league games and because my shows are like it

becomes we have to we have to put ourselves in a historical perspective and say, yep, you might lose some memories for two three four years um and you don't owe anybody anything your kids don't know that kind of peace right your marriage doesn't know that kind of peace well then there's a generational ripple effect right because you took care of your family and you got to take care of your kids your kids got to take their their kids you got to leave an inheritance leave a legacy and so that the book unpacks in the first two thirds just how disgusting the system is to make you want to take a shower. It'll give you the ick enough to go, I'm going to try to cut up that credit card once and for all. I guess I don't need it. I guess I don't need to keep up my credit score. I guess I am going to pay my student loans off because

there's no white knight coming in on the horse to save me. Those kinds of decisions, I think, is what people need going into next year as they go. My life didn't change last year because of some guy in the White House or because of the housing market. I'm going to make some changes. And so this book lays out how I did it, how I went from broke to millionaire, how I broke free from the system. And now I've seen so many people stand on our debt-free stage and say the same exact thing. Well, dude, I'm proud of you. Thanks for putting this out into the world. Thank you. Into a world that desperately needs it.

And I try to do it with humor as I do, John, and lots of research. You know me. Yeah. I got to have fun while I'm doing it. I trust the research part. The humor part, I don't know about that. There's a poison reference in there that was just for you. So see if you can spot it.

I would have preferred a John Delaney reference, but that's cool. Go to ramsaysolutions.com slash store. It's 20 bucks. Go ahead and get on the pre-order list right now. Let's go out to New Hampshire and talk to Annie. What's up, Annie? Hi, how are you? We're doing all right.

How are you? Good, thanks. Thanks for taking my call. You got it. What's up? Well, I found myself. It's been a hard few years. I have four kids, and I'm going through a really bad divorce. And, um,

I'm sorry. It's okay. He left like completely. And, um, I don't know where he is. I am getting child support and alimony, but I like to stay at home mom. I'm 35 years old. I have about 20 grand in student loan debt, and I'm not sure where to start. I have a two-and-a-half-year-old, and I'm home with her right now. So are your other kids in school? Yeah, I have three kids in school. Okay. You have 11, 10, and 7. Okay. So you have three kids in school. Okay. You did 11, 10, and 7. Okay.

So you have a lot going on. What question can I help you with today? So question, it's like, I mean, I did three and a half years of college. Okay. But it was like a theater communications degree. Okay. Should I finish my degree or should I, I mean, should I focus on like working with my child child at a preschool and just budgeting? Do you have enough?

Does your alimony and child support, is it certified by a courtroom? Yes. Okay. So the divorce is final? In March, it'll be final. Okay. But the payments have been locked in? Yes.

Okay, it's not just some agreement that your husband just sent a check. What is that income every month? It's about $6,100. Okay, and that's enough to cover all the bills and more? Yeah, well, he is covering all the house bills right now. I would have had higher alimony if he wasn't doing that. Does that make sense? Yeah.

What other debt do you have outside of the $20,000 in student loans? Maybe like $30,000 in credit card debt. Okay. And how much money do you have in the bank? Maybe like $6,000. Okay, great. So what we're going to do is focus on this debt payoff because that's going to give you some breathing room here.

If you free up those payments, that's going to give you at least a few hundred bucks extra every single month, correct? Yes. And then that'll help us build a fully funded emergency fund. I want you to have six months of expenses so add up what monthly expenses are to run your house and then multiply that by six that's going to be your next goal after we get rid of this debt okay and then we're going to focus on do we go back to work what do we do with child care and focus on those decisions after that

but i think you're gonna have to go back to work to get this stuff back, right? I mean, to get this debt paid off. How much money do you have left over to throw at debt each month? So this is kind of crazy. I just, I let him handle all the finances. Starting today, you handle it and we're going to help you with that. Yeah. Yeah, we're going to hook you up with a whole bunch of stuff, but you're going to have to use these tools. Here's what you need right now more than anything, a plan. Yes.

Because you've been spinning out for a long time, haven't you? Your whole world blew up, right? Yep. Yeah. So we're going to hook you up with a bunch of resources, including a financial coach that will help you build a budget from the floor up. Okay? Because all this stuff's new. You've been letting somebody do this.

We're going to get you taken care of, but I want you to follow this. And listen, this is real important. You had four kids, and the picture of your life that you had mapped out for the next probably almost two decades was to be a stay-at-home mom. That world is probably over. That picture. That's okay. It's just going to be very different. You're going to have to grieve what was, and then you're going to have to just build a new picture. And now you're going to be a working single mom with four kids. It's going to be busy. It's going to be chaotic. And we're going to give you some tools and you're going to use

some resources in your community and you're going to knock this thing out of the park. Okay. We believe in you. Do you believe in you? Yeah. And you know, what's so awesome. My kids have been, we've been listening to you guys all weekend and my son who's 11 and goes, come on, are you calling, calling, calling? Well, I'm glad you did. Cause we got you. All right. I'm going to send you building a non-anxious life. We're going to send you FPU. We're going to send you every dollar for a year and some time, a couple of sessions with a financial coach. We've got you. Call anytime. We're so sorry this happened. It's the first hour in the books here on The Ramsey Show.