The Ramsey Show - App - How Do I Plan a Wedding While Paying Off Debt? (Hour 1)
Episode Date: March 31, 2021Debt, Investing, Retirement, Budgeting Sign Up for a FREE trial of Ramsey+ TODAY: https://bit.ly/31ricKt Tools to get you started: Debt Calculator: https://bit.ly/2QIoSPV Insurance Coverag...e Checkup: https://bit.ly/2BrqEuo Complete Guide to Budgeting: https://bit.ly/2QEyonc Check out more Ramsey Network podcasts: https://bit.ly/2JgzaQR
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all right jeremy is with us in sacramento hey jeremy how can we help today how are you doing
thanks for having me on gentlemen sure um me. Me and my wife actually started following you at the end of February this year, so just a little over a month ago.
Wow.
And kind of what got me going is when I did my taxes and realized that we made decent money but had no money to show for it at the end.
That's a different level of disgust, isn't it?
Yes, it is.
Where'd it go?
Yeah. level of disgust isn't it yes it is yeah so uh ended up uh purchasing your program doing all the
on uh i fell in love with it showed my wife she fell in love with it because we had both kind of
felt the same way for a little bit after adding up all of our debt snowballs we're about uh ninety
seven thousand dollars in debt um uh one of which was my eight800 a month truck payment.
Whoa.
So within the first two weeks, I was able to sell my truck and only ended up eating about $300.
Wow.
So we were super blessed in that.
And so now we've been doing the –
How much did the truck sell for?
$46,500.
Oh, so half of your debt was pickup.
Yes, and so I had purchased it for about $50,000 about two years before.
You did okay.
Yeah, and so we've been hitting it this month,
and we're down to about $29,000 left that we're going to be paying off.
And so we're super grateful for you guys to kind
of just lead us in the right direction. Man, you're on fire. I love it.
My question is, we're still, hopefully by the end of July, we'll be completely out of debt. And so
approximately October, we should have our three months saved. For retirement, I work for a company
where they take out for pension, we have to contribute 9.5% that they pull out, and I'll get it when I retire.
But for the 15%, when I go for investing, how would I contribute that?
Because they don't match or anything, so I'll be pulling it probably into my 401k Roth.
Well, here's my theory on it, okay? Okay. And can you can decide what you want to do but here's how i came
up with the answer and then i'll give you the answer the the pension what it's invested in
is number one not in your control so the rates of return that you make versus you can select a
mutual fund in a 401k and so if you don't like this one, you can get another one.
And so you have a sense of control.
And if you've got a bad investment, you can move it around.
With a pension, it just is what it is.
You're stuck with it.
Problem number one.
Problem number two with a pension is it's not in your name.
If you have a 401k and your company goes broke, the 401k is in your name.
It's not an asset of the company.
You get all your money.
If your company goes broke and you have a pension, it is an asset on their books, and you may get zero.
That's a possibility if they went broke.
Okay?
So point being of both of these things is you're not in control of your destiny, but it is your money, 9.5%, that you're putting in mandatory every month.
And so I want to count some of it towards the 15%,
but because of those two problems, I'm going to count only about half of it.
So let's just call it 5%, and so now you need to do 10% otherwise.
Because I want you to have
substantial money that is in your control and that ten percent will still get you there does
that make any sense yes sir that's what i was just trying to look for a number i wasn't sure if it
was we were up as high as like 13 or 14 to balance the difference but there's no magic there's no
magic i just made that up okay okay uh years ago Years ago, I made it up. But the reasoning behind it is I'm going to count it at about 50% because it's got these two major problems where you're not in control and you could lose it.
Where with your 401K, you're in control and you don't lose it in the event the company goes belly up.
So we give it some weight, but not a hundred cent on the dollar weight do companies have an exigency a financial excess exigency is that the right word they have the
ability to roll that pension out of where it sits and pay their bills with it if they got
no if it got too bad no it's held and they're highly regulated and how even a pension plan is
yeah and in how you can invest it which is also actually
one of the problems because they can't invest it as well because it's considered too aggressive
as you would with mutual funds okay and so the returns are usually in the six to seven percent
range rather than in the ten to twelve percent range okay and so you're not making as much on
your money either but uh they don't have access to it to pay payroll Friday or something
like that.
But it is an asset on the books.
Their book's not yours.
And so because you don't have this ownership position, you know, kind of the old almost
legendary story in a movie or something like the mine went broke and Papa lost his pension.
Right.
You know, well, that's exactly what happened.
Can they borrow money against that since it's an asset?
Nope. So it's just a floating. It's just a money against that since it's an asset? Nope.
So it's just a floating...
It's just a thing over there.
It's a bookkeeping entry, but the problem is the ownership and the regulation.
It's over-regulated, so they have to dumb down what they're doing.
Right.
And because to keep them from...
Being stupid with it.
Being stupid with it and screwing you up, right, since you don't have control of it.
But the unintended consequences is it's this watered-down rates of return.
I didn't know companies had to hold it as an asset.
Well, I mean, it's not an asset that's usable.
Which makes it almost worse, right?
It's just like a balloon.
To your point.
But the problem still lies that the mine went broke and Papa lost his pensions thing still is a real thing.
You know, and some of the pensions have good insurance on them and all kinds of there's all kinds of ways that you're probably not going to lose your money.
But, I mean, unions, they mishandle them sometimes.
The unions are notorious for that.
Or municipalities go bankrupt.
Yeah.
I mean, you've seen Detroit and Birmingham and some of the other areas.
I mean, they've seen Detroit and Birmingham and some of the other areas. I mean, they've had real issues. And even some of these states are very poorly run.
Well, especially if they're bonded out, man, and the interest rates, man, that's going to be a mess. They're jammed up on their dadgum, you know, the way they run business sucks. The business aspect of running the state, the governing of the state is done poorly so you just have to you know you don't
you can't automatically assume it's gold it's not gold but it's probably okay i'm not trying to be
melodramatic but but i just don't count it at 100 cents when we're doing the calculation because i
really just like this whole thing of if i know i am responsible for my turnout of my destiny
then that is one of the keys for it to turn out well.
Because you've got to be invested intentionally, right?
If you're waiting on someone else to do this for you,
whether it's the government, your company, your pension,
and somehow you can relinquish the responsibility
for your future to someone else,
that's the moment you got screwed.
When you gave up the belief
that you are responsible for your future.
You have to get up, leave the cave, kill something and drag it home,
hustle, grind, get your butt on fire, get some stuff happening.
You control your destiny.
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easy and convenient. Call them at 800-356-4282 or visit zander.com for instant online quotes. Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey Personality, is my co-host today.
The phone number is 888-825-5225.
Katrina is in Detroit.
Hi, Katrina.
How can we help?
Hey, super nervous to talk to you guys.
My question is, I recently just got engaged and I would like
to start planning for our wedding, but the problem is, is I'm a hot mess and in debt.
So I want to be responsible while still trying to pay off debt and not get further into debt,
but also still plan a good wedding. Good for you. So any tips or advice for trying to get a good
budget number and how to move forward, as well as
talking to my now fiance of how we want to tackle debt after we get married.
Okay.
What do you make a year?
Around 70.
What does he make a year?
Around 30.
Okay.
And how much hot mess debt have you got?
105.
And that's in what?
A little bit of everything.
Hospital, credit cards, student loans.
What's the big one?
Student loan?
Student loans.
How much?
Yep.
$78,000.
$78,000.
How much do you owe on the car?
No car.
No car.
Okay.
So credit cards, student loans, and other miscellaneous crap is the other uh twenty some
odd thousand dollars yep okay how old are you 27 i had to think about it what do you do for a living
i'm sorry say say that again you're how old 27 27 okay 27 okay what do you do for a living? Huh? Research. You're a researcher? Okay. Okay.
Good.
Yes.
Okay.
So what do you think the budget ought to be for the wedding?
You're paying for 100% of it, right?
Correct.
Okay.
The two of you are.
Mom and dad aren't helping.
Yes.
Correct.
Okay. I was thinking around 20, but as soon as I start thinking towards 20, I'm like, that's
a student loan I could pay off.
So I wanted to get a firm, good number that that i can just like this is what we're planning
we're just going to sink sunk on it and this is what it is and then just move forward from there
all right the average wedding in america last year was 28 000
that means that a considerable number of people spent more than that and a considerable number
of people spent a lot less than that the average household income in america last year was right
around 60 000 so the typical family is spending a maximum or an average of half of their annual
income on a wedding but they don't5,000 worth of debt hanging over their
head either necessarily, and some of those, mom and dad are paying for it.
So we have to factor all of that stuff in, but that's just some numbers to keep into
consideration, okay?
Got a lot of young people in my building here, a lot of them getting married every year while
they're trying to get out of debt, so they face the exact same equation you have and i have personally attended many many many wonderful weddings in the ten
thousand dollar and under range okay perfect so i'm making this up i'm just throwing out some
numbers there so i threw out 28 i threw out 10 you threw out 20 you make you got a household
income when you're married of $100,000,
but you got $105,000 hanging over your head, so that's affecting this decision.
The beauty of your question is once you make this decision,
you set a wedding budget, you stick to it, a full breakdown.
You run a wedding like it's a project for research, okay?
And then you can stick to it.
It's not going to randomly happen, in other words.
In other words, if you say, we're going to spend $12,500.
I don't care.
I just made that number up.
Then you have to decide, okay, how much on the reception?
How much on the videographer?
How much on the location?
How much are we going to put into how many groomsmen and bridesmaids and gifts?
And, you know, you kind of line item out this budget because your biggest item in most weddings is the reception, budget-wise.
I've been involved in the background, way in the background, of three Ramsey weddings in the last few years.
But we did run them on a budget, and we did run them like a project, because that's the only way Dad's putting his freaking money in there.
But the whole point is, is you do all this, and then it takes the pressure off, because
we're going to spend X number of dollars on the dress, which means you're not going to
spend 2X.
And you don't have to make all these ambivalent, stress-based decisions over and over and over
again once you make the one decision does that make sense completely so i think your 20s a little
high but not way high i don't think you're crazy and once you make the decision i don't want to be
once you make that decision have some peace with yourself yeah right you know you tap out on other
people's expectations because some people are going to think you spent too much.
Some people are going to think you didn't spend enough, and it's not their dadgum wedding.
I like that.
And there's – Dave, help me with this, and Katrina will benefit from the conversation.
I feel this tension, which is she owes $105,000.
Man, you've got to get this thing taken care of.
And the math part of me says, go to the justice of the peace, work really hard to get your debt paid off, and then throw a big party in a couple years.
Then there's another side of me that says, we have stripped our culture of every sort of important heritage, ritual.
We've just sucked the soul out of our culture and i would say no if you're
gonna if you're gonna do something right do a wedding upright yeah because you're gonna do it
once you're gonna do it big and it's gonna be something that you it's gonna be a touchstone
for the rest of your life yep help me find some wisdom in between those two things i think you're
exactly right okay and so the point is you don't go crazy. You're not trying to make a reality show out of this dadgum thing, right, on the one hand.
But now if someone calls and says, look, we're bound and determined.
We both just want to do the JP.
We're just going to go to the preacher's office and get this done.
I'm not going to be mad at you for doing that.
That's your choice.
Right.
But I also don't want to say as your financial advisor you have to do that because otherwise you're unwise.
Okay.
Because part of personal finance is this is a milestone.
And she needs a ring, and she needs a wedding, and she needs a bride's dress.
You know?
And there's a milestone here, and there's a celebration around this.
And there's a historical precedent for thousands of years, right?
As long as there have been weddings, they've been a big deal.
Right. There you go. And funerals, right? Weddings and funerals. And births. For as long as there have been weddings, they've been a big deal.
Right.
There you go.
And funerals, right?
Weddings and funerals.
And births.
I mean, these are the tuning forks of life.
They reset your head.
And so I think you need to have a wedding, personally.
I would.
I agree. I mean, if you were my child, one of my grown kids that came to me, I'd say you need to spend something on it, but let's not go hog wild.
I'm kind of, my head, just the math that we've all bounced around, Katrina,
I'm bouncing between 10 and 15 in my head right now.
That makes sense.
But if you come back and say, you know, we talked about it, we're going to do 7,
I'm cool with that.
Or we're going to do 17, I'm cool with that.
But what I do want you to do is I want you to set that number.
Pay cash for it.
Pay cash for it.
Be free after that because you're going to set, you know,
a budget that you set and are in control of the number,
then sets you free to make a lot of decisions on what you're not going to do.
You're not going to overspend.
You know, this is not an Academy Award motion picture.
We need a few videos.
Hey, Katrina, does this guy like you?
Yes. A lot? I hope so.
You know, a lot?
He's a good guy?
So I don't want you to walk
into your wedding as though
you are the ball and chain
here financially.
I want you to walk in with your head held high.
He has agreed to take you and all of you
and then y'all are going to work on this debt together.
If you walk in already ashamed of who you are and your financial position,
that's going to start your marriage off a step down.
And then you're going to have this weird inequity thing that's going to go on.
It's going to rattle around through your relationship for years to come.
Walk in with your head held high.
You put all the money on the table, all the dollars on the table.
But I am willing to own that, and we're going to attack them, and it's in the past.
The rearview mirror is smaller than the windshield.
That's right.
That's right.
But go in with your head held high.
He loves you, and he's committed to you and all of you, and y'all are going to do this thing together.
Yeah, you're awesome.
Thank you for calling in.
That's a really good question to talk through.
I've just watched our culture strip it all away.
Well, I mean, I've had people come in and go,
my wife's going to sell her diamond ring for the dead snowball.
And I'm like, no.
Right.
But it's even further like knocking down.
If it's a $48,000 diamond ring, we'll talk about it.
But I mean, if it's a typical diamond ring for, no, you keep your dadgum ring.
It doesn't, $10,000 out of 100 when you make 100 doesn't change this equation much, by the way.
Correct.
Correct. But there's something about knocking down. I don't100 doesn't change this equation much, by the way. Correct. Correct.
But there's something about knocking down, I don't know, this is where I can get off the rails.
There's something about knocking down Grandma's house so we can cram two tall and skinnies on that little lot so we all feel good.
What have you been driving around Nashville?
There's something about heritage, man, and just finding that balance, that wisdom balance.
Yeah.
I'm with you.
I agree.
This is The Ramsey Show. Thank you. In the lobby of Ramsey Solutions on the debt-free stage, Chris and Caitlin are with us.
Hey, guys, how are you?
Hey, good.
How are you?
Welcome, welcome.
Good to have you guys.
Where do you live?
San Antonio, Texas.
Good.
And you're here to do a debt-free scream.
How much did you pay off?
We paid off $230,000.
Hee-hee!
Whoa!
And how long did this take?
We started February of 2015, and then we made our last payment on Christmas Day of this
year.
So, six years?
Roughly.
Just shy of six years.
Just shy of six years.
All right.
Very good.
That's a range of income during that time?
We started at 38, and then we ended at 150.
Okay, cool.
So with that length of time and that large an amount, was that student loans, or did you pay off your mortgage?
Oh, gosh.
It was majority student loans.
We borrowed a lot.
Yes. Looked at the student loans as if it's like a giant credit card where we were just living off of it, maxing out our loans and what referred to the reaping my fruit before we even planted the seeds.
What's your degree in?
My degree is in nuclear medicine, but currently I work for a tech company.
Okay.
And I am a physical therapist assistant.
Very cool.
Okay.
Well, two great career fields, but boy, did you pay dearly for them, huh?
Yes, we did.
Yeah.
So what's your household income now?
50?
150?
150.
Between the two of you.
Yes, sir.
And probably on the way up, right?
Oh, yeah.
Yes.
How old are you two?
I'm 33.
And I will be 38 later this year.
All right. And $230,000 cleared off in six years. So tell us the story. What happened?
It all started back in 2015. My boss at the time, shout out Chad Keck, hey, he gifted all of his
employees the Financial Peace Book. And I read it and I thought, wow, there's a plan for this.
It makes so much sense because we were at a point where we borrowed so much we couldn't actually borrow anymore.
Chris was in school.
I had just gotten my adult job.
And I read the book and was like, oh, this gives me every step, how to save, how to start paying my student loans.
It gave us a way out.
And so after reading the book, I brought it to Chris. I was like, Chris, I think this is it. You've
got to read this. Please read this. I've never asked you to read a book before, but please
read this book, Anna.
Well, yeah, I read it and immediately came to her and was like, yeah, that makes sense.
Let's do this. And she's like, okay, one of the first things I want to do is I want to cut the cable off.
I'm like, you want to do what?
And she's like, yeah.
What did I just sign up for?
Exactly.
But I won't do that.
And then she wanted to move down an apartment.
We had a two-bedroom, really large apartment.
And she's like, I also want to move down.
I'm like, wait, what?
So I had to go back and reread your book.
I was like, I missed something apparently along the way.
When someone with a degree in nuclear medicine says this is how it's going to be, you just go, yeah, that's cool.
I'm telling you.
But then once I read your book and I caught that part of the gazelle intensity.
And one of the first things I looked at was the fact that I had this brand, this F-150 I've wanted since high school.
And we were, yeah, we had what you referred to as the log jam.
I'm like, how are we going to break this up?
Because we had $40 a month, $40 left over at the end of the month.
I'm like, how are we going to do this?
And I looked at my shiny truck and said, oh, I'm going to go sell that. And my wife was like, well, I didn't want to tell you to do that, but I'm so glad you want to do that i was like i can't force you to do it but man i'm so glad you decided on
your own i took your house you're a real man now that you decided that yeah so i sold that truck
and i got a little three thousand dollar prius and then uh signed up for a pizza delivering company
wow and uh started delivering pizzas to pay cash for my college for the rest of the way.
What did you make a month delivering pizzas? Oh, man. I was pulling at least like $100 a night
every single time doing that, especially whenever the Spurs were in the playoffs. How many nights a
month? I was doing that five days a week during that time. So you're making like $2,000, $3,000
a month. Just off of that, but that was all going to make sure that we don't take any more student
loans. I got that. But I mean, still, that's a lot of pizza money.
Yes, sir.
Very well done.
But I want to note that because when you made this decision, you started working really hard,
and your hard work was to keep you from not digging anymore.
You weren't even going, you weren't getting ahead at this point.
You worked this hard just to stay level.
And finish school.
Yeah.
Between that and the fact that i was
in school with this need for gazelle intensity at the time it was equivalent of if the cheetah got
a head start and i'm just rearing back behind the gate waiting to catch up and then as soon as i
finished school i was working seven days a week three different jobs wow good for you man wow
and then six years later you're're done. Six years later.
That's a long time.
Yes, sir.
And Caitlin, you know when a Texas guy sells his truck for a Prius, he's all in.
Oh, let me tell you.
He's all in.
God, that was a hard one, yeah.
Even you're like, I don't know, honey.
I was so proud of him, though, because that truck got nine miles to the gallon.
I was like, we can't even afford the gas.
Man, that's impressive.
Well, when you're willing to live like no one else so that later you can live like no one else, it works.
Yes, sir.
It works.
And now you're free.
You're 30 years old and some change, and you've got no debt at all, and you make $100.50 on your way to $200.50.
And, you know, oh, my gosh.
Your future is multimillionaires.
Yes, sir.
It's right there.
I can see it.
I mean, I see the math.
I've watched it for 30 years.
You're going to do it.
I'm so proud of y'all.
Thank you very much.
It's amazing.
I mean, your hard work, your sacrifice.
Okay, we talked about several things you did on the journey.
Is there anything you want to add when I say when people ask how'd you do
this what do you tell them definitely consistency and creating a budget I know a lot of people say
you know doing the budget was the thing but we thought we were on a budget until we actually
did a budget together um because I was the one that mainly took care of the finances and when
I got him involved we're like oh we're missing some things we're not covering everything um but
once we got our budget we realized what we could afford
to keep us out of debt. And it kept us on the same page and helped us communicate more.
It was just the whole journey was the best marriage counseling we've
ever done since we never did it. So I'm glad we went through this.
So we're always on the same page and have the same goals now.
I think for me, the key is to his belief, whether you're paying off debt,
you're trying to lose weight or try to quit smoking,
if you don't believe that what you're doing is not working,
if you don't believe the process is working,
or if you don't believe that the other side of all of this is worth it,
then you're not going to pursue it as much without struggling.
There was times where I was metaphorically crawling on my hands and knees
because I was physically tired and emotionally exhausted from working so much.
But knowing that this was a light at the end of the tunnel, I kept pushing.
Wow. Very, very. You're right. Very impressive.
I mean, people who, if you want to sacrifice or embrace pain with no potential outcome,
that's just mental illness.
I mean, there has to be a reason to do this.
There has to be a light at the end of the tunnel.
It's not an oncoming pain.
There has to be a little bit in there.
It's just strange, man.
So you guys know that's very, very, very well done.
Very well done.
What was the hardest part for you?
It was literally the day-by-day and knowing it would take us so long.
When we started, we knew it would be at least five years.
And, of course, all the different roadblocks that came, you know, with medical bills, global pandemic.
Oh, there's that.
Just a little bit. And then not to mention Texas had a nice little snowpocalypse that happened recently.
Oh, yeah.
That helped.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
We had that, too.
Definitely day by day, just being each other's cheerleader and getting through.
One of our biggest goals is we want to get a house.
Yeah.
Since we're in such a small apartment.
And we knew if we don't do this, it's not even a possibility.
Yeah.
That's not even going to happen.
Well, now you can.
For sure.
We have more options now.
Well done.
I'm so proud of you guys.
This is so cool. Thank you so much. They're amazing. Yeah. They're amazing. And your marriage, come you can. For sure. We have more options now. Well done. I'm so proud of you guys. This is so cool.
Thank you so much.
They're amazing.
Yeah.
And your marriage, come what may, come the house buying, come kids, come in-law challenges,
you have a six-year chain that y'all have built that nothing's going to come your way
that you can't figure out and sit down at a table and work together.
Because that same skill you learned, budgeting, is how you're going to sit down and approach
hard conversations and challenges and job layoffs and job
successes and hey we got to move somewhere else and whatever that's what's going to put your way
built into their brains that's right it's who you guys are i'm so proud of you man chris and kate
in san antonio 230 000 paid off in six years making 33 to 150 they did150. They did it! Hard work!
Count it down.
Let's hear a debt-free scream.
All right, everybody, you might want to turn your volume down a little bit.
All right. Ready?
Three, two, one.
We're debt-free!
Yeah!
Woo-hoo!
Wow!
Unbelievable.
This is The Ramsey Show. We'll be right back. Thanks for joining us, America.
This is The Ramsey Show.
Dr. John Deloney is my co-host.
Open phones at 888-825-5225.
Rachel's in Green Bay, Wisconsin.
Hi, Rachel.
How are you?
Good.
How are you guys doing?
Better than I deserve.
How can I help?
So, my husband and I recently bought our first home, and we're trying to figure out how much
is too much to spend on some updates and purchases for the house.
Updates and, oh, you want to do some renovation after you bought it.
Yes, so we're looking to do some new paint, some carpet.
We need a few appliances because the sellers are taking some of them with them
and just kind of looking at some big price tags
and not wanting to spend too much money.
Okay.
Number one, do you have the cash to do whatever it is we're talking about, no debt?
Yes.
Okay.
And do you have that above your emergency fund?
Yes.
And you are debt-free except the house?
We actually don't have a mortgage either.
Oh, well, that's nice.
So you pay cash for this house?
Yes.
Wow.
So what's the house?
What did you pay for it?
We paid $290 for it.
Good for you.
How'd you do that?
Our parents helped us out with about half,
and then we're just the big big savers who never liked
it okay cool so you have a three hundred thousand dollar house that you paid cash for how old are
you uh 24 good god almighty you are a freak i love you you're amazing that's so cool so what are you thinking about spending on these renovations
um and total probably about 25 000 and you have the 25 000 yes do it yes yesterday do it you are
not listen the two of you the way your brain and your relationship is put together the chances of
you overspending or being impulsive on something is almost zero.
It's almost zero.
Okay, so.
Okay.
I would probably tell you to add to it just because, but I won't.
Just to have the enjoyment.
Yeah, spend $30,000, okay?
Yeah.
Yeah, you guys are incredible.
Very well done.
What's your household income?
Combined about $150,000.
Wow.
What do you all do for a living?
I'm in analytics, and my husband's an engineer.
So how did you learn that these principles were important?
Where did you learn all this, from your mom and dad, or what?
Yeah, I remember my mom listening to you in the car when i was in elementary school
when she was picking me up from school it's genetic for you at this point right
right exactly and then a really great guy who was yeah just right on board right at the start so
so that sounds like a joke like a an analytics person engineer walking to a bar right what do
y'all do for fun?
Like, you get a bottle of wine and some spreadsheets,
and you're like, this is, like, what do you all do for fun?
Like, I'm being serious.
Yeah, we were recently married, and, you know, we like to go take trips,
but haven't been able to do that too much.
But I know we're just kind of homebodies.
Good for you.
Let me ask you something.
What is the thing you're thinking about buying for this house that you really don't want to do it
because you think it's over the top and crazy?
We'd like to get some really nice patio set up outside yeah i think you need to build a full-on
outdoor kitchen okay absolutely and let him engineer here's what i'm doing okay there's
three things that you can do with money you can give it you can live it spend it in other words
and enjoy it um or you can invest it. You have no trouble saving and investing.
But it is a good exercise for you to also learn to enjoy money.
I very seldom have to have that conversation on this show.
Most of the time I'm like, quit spending like you're in Congress.
But you need to loosen up and enjoy it because you're very disciplined.
You're very intentional.
I'm so thankful your mama made you listen when you were in elementary school, so you're
a financial peace baby.
I'm glad that we're part of your story of incredible success, but part of your success
is generosity, and part of your success is enjoying the money, as well as continuing
to be very careful, very wise, and very intentional.
And it's hard to get off the rails with a paid-for house at 24.
Paid for $300,000.
Yeah, making $100,500.
Making $150,000.
And those career fields are both going up.
Highly transferable field.
And they're going up from there.
I mean, they're going to make, in two years, it'll be at $200,000.
Easy.
Between the two of them.
So you guys are going to be multi-millionaires.
And your outdoor kitchen isn't going to mess that up.
It's going to help your homebody-ness to have a cool outdoor kitchen, right?
I love this.
Wow, what a cool story.
Zev's in San Francisco.
Hi, Zev.
Hi, Dave.
Long-time listener, first-time caller.
Really, it's an honor to speak with you.
You too, sir.
Thank you. The reason I'm calling was because unfortunately, my father died about five months ago, leaving me a house in San Francisco.
Yeah, I'm sorry. Left me a house in San Francisco. Thank you. Thank you. I appreciate that. But the
silver lining, I guess, as it were, is that he did leave me a house in San Francisco and a pretty sizable estate.
He left me about a house worth about $2 million and an estate worth about $4 million on top of that.
How old are you?
I'm 32.
Okay.
Are you married?
I'm not married.
Okay.
Nope.
All right.
Go ahead.
And I came into this, I was already worth about $300,000 when this all
happened. My annual income is around the $40,000 mark. I actually am a law school dropout. I dropped
out of law school about five years ago to caretake for my father and never went back. So that's kind
of the situation from a career standpoint.
I've been teaching in the meantime.
What's your question?
My question is, the house is falling apart,
but I'm very sentimentally attached to it,
but I hate San Francisco and California,
and I'm facing a lot of repair costs,
but I do have a very low tax rates because of this thing called
prop 13 in California. I pay about a thousand dollars a year. Um, my question is, do I take
money from this estate and just dump it into the house and fix it up? Or do I try to get over the
sentimental piece of this and look at it more from a financial perspective and just say,
you know what, this house is a money pit, and sell it, and go live out of state
where I can live the kind of life that I want for a much lower cost of living.
That's basically my question.
I like the emotional simplicity of selling it now and moving.
Okay?
The downside of that is that that's going to hurt because of the freshness of selling it now and moving okay the downside of that is that's going
to hurt because of the freshness of the story if your dad had passed two years ago it would feel
you will feel more released than you do with him passing five months ago does that make sense
yes yeah your sentimental value from that for that house is going to go down every day that you own it from today forward.
And so it's going to be emotionally easier to let it go a year from today than it is today.
But aside from, you know, your grieving and your attachment to the house and your memories and all of those things,
you also have this other side that sees a fresh start, a clean whiteboard, and there's a lot of health in you moving on.
John, from a grief perspective, if he sells it now and truncates some of those feelings, is that a problem?
No, because every day you stay there is going to be a penalty paid against the memory of your father. And you already have part of your heart,
as much as you love your dad,
that says, I gave up this dream,
I gave up this world to love and honor and take care of him.
And continuing that way of living
is going to end up compressing this memory of your dad.
And so I'm going to tell you to sell the house,
go be free.
Selling this house is in your future anyway.
Sell your house.
Go start over clean.
That's the best way to honor your father moving forward.
And rehabbing that house is going to be more emotional than sitting in it for six months.
And you're going to sell it anyway.
Yeah.
I'll just sell it and move on.
I really would.
And that has nothing to do with financial. That's just opening the next chapter in the book of your life.
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