The Ramsey Show - App - How Much Can We Budget for Fun? (Hour 1)

Episode Date: April 12, 2021

Debt, Savings, Budgeting, Home Buying, Career Sign Up for a FREE trial of Ramsey+ TODAY: https://bit.ly/3rZTUAx Tools to get you started:  Debt Calculator: https://bit.ly/2Q64HME Insurance Coverage Checkup: https://bit.ly/3sXwUn5 Complete Guide to Budgeting: https://bit.ly/3utmVXi Check out more Ramsey Network podcasts: https://bit.ly/3fHhbVE

Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studios, it's the Ramsey Show, where debt is dumb, cash is king, and the paid-off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW as the status symbol of choice. Christy Wright, Ramsey personality, number one best-selling author, is my co-host today as we take your questions about your life and your money. It's a free call at 888-825-5225. That's 888-825-5225. Stephen in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, starts off this hour.

Hey, Stephen, what's up? Hey, David. How are you doing? Better than I deserve, sir. How can we help? Thank you. I am 21 years old, and I have about $20,000 in cash that I saved up. I'm going to be going off to college in the fall,

and I'm planning on buying real estate, but a three-bedroom home that I can rent out the rooms and help me pay my mortgage so I don't have to pay rent when I go up to college. I also have about a $4,000 car loan that I have yet to pay off. And my uncle has been advising me to buy a house,

but my mom is kind of like hesitant about me doing it. So I'd just like to get your advice. Well, I love real estate, and I love the fact that you're putting some thought into this. I like all of that. I think it's good on your part. Where'd you get $20,000 at 21 years old? Way to go.

I was a general manager for a QSR restaurant making pizzas. And I did that for about a year. And I was fortunate enough to save up good money while I was living with my mom. I still am, actually, right now. Okay. So where are you going to college? I'm going to Orlando at UCF. Good for you.

It's a great school. I went there for a year and a half. That's awesome. It's the largest school in America right now. And it's a great school. I went there for a year and a half. That's awesome. It's the largest school in America right now, and it's a great school. We've done events there on campus and gotten to know a lot of their administration there. It's a solid choice. Okay. Well, while I love real estate, I would advise you against your plan.

I'm not sure I can talk you out of it, but here is the downsides of your plan. You are trying to go to school and learn and graduate. The distraction of running a business dealing with freaking roommates could really be devastating. It sounds like a hot knife through butter, and it's not. You're going to deal with so much freaking drama over this four years with roommates and collecting rent and whose ketchup that is in the refrigerator and all this other BS that you're going to get distracted from your studies. And you're worried about real estate instead of being worried about getting your degree.

You have one freaking job for the next four years, and that's graduate on time with your degree with no debt. And I would use the $20,000 towards that end, and I would be a renter, and I would have very little going on in my life except going to school and graduating on time or early. This is such a transitional time in your life too, Stephen. While that seems like a great idea right now, and like Dave said, I don't think it's a bad idea in general. I think it's just a bad idea right now because you have no idea what the next three years

holds. You have no idea what type of expenses you're going to have. You need to pay off that debt with some of the money that you have. Keep saving up, cash flow your way through college. And then when you're out of college, you know you want to put down roots there. You know where you want to be, all that good stuff. You have your degree behind you, some more money in the bank, three to six months of expenses, you're debt-free.

Then save up and put that money down on a house. I'll give you an example, Dave. I went to UCF for a year and a half, and I loved it, but I realized after living there a year and a half, I didn't want to put down roots there. I didn't want to get married, get a job, live there forever. I wanted to go back to Tennessee. And so I decided to transfer to UT Knoxville to get in-state tuition to save my mom the money since I wasn't going to live there forever. But when I went as a freshman, I didn't know that. And you just don't know a lot at 18. You think you know, but you're going

to learn a lot about yourself, your dreams, your plans in the next four years. And so save that money before you make any long-term commitments like that, especially with the cash that you have. And then after college, make some of those decisions. So I'll even one-up that. I went to school to get a degree in finance and real estate. I was selling real estate for a living while I was in school. I love real estate. I almost bought a home in Maryville, Tennessee, outside of Knoxville.

I was going to the University of Tennessee, a little cheap but, little nothing house, because I wanted to be a real estate investor like you do. And if I had done that when sharon and i got married and decided to move across the state after graduation we would have been stuck with this stinky butt little house in maryville tennessee and it would have been an anchor to our plans instead of a blessing yeah and that's what christy's referring to with this level of transition in your life so it's a good idea at the wrong time which makes it a bad idea for all of those reasons. Please don't do it.

Please take $4,000 and pay off your car today. Bank the rest of it and invest in the highest possible investment on the planet. His name is Matt. Invest in yourself, making sure you graduate debt-free. Stephen. Stephen. Yep. His name is Stephen.

You can invest in Matt, too, but you're Stephen. Matt or Stephen, but I want to make sure Stephen knows knows we're talking steven's like who's matt i missed that what's the next call that's up and that's how it shows how bad this show really is i want steven to make sure he knew we were talking to him thank you thank you yeah oh that was bad okay i don't know i don't know how you recover from that we. We go to Matt. That's how we recover. Matt's next. Hey, Matt. Stephen's going to be investing in you. I hope you like that. What's up, man?

That sounds good to me. So what's up? How can we help? So I just have a general question related to budgeting. I always have an argument with my wife exactly how much we're able to spend on, you know, things to enjoy our lives like vac vacations and I like to golf. I'm more of a spender, going out to eat, things like that. We're pretty well off. Are you out of debt?

No debt, yeah. Okay, and you have an emergency fund. Yeah. What's your household income? Maybe about $220,20 to $230. And what are you wanting to budget for entertainment and golf, and what is she saying she wants to? So I guess, I mean, it kind of varies, obviously.

I don't golf in the outfield. Okay, there's your problem. You're making this crap up as you go. You're not agreeing to anything, and she sees this as an infinite bottomless pit. You just want to spend what you want when you want to right yeah no you can't be a child you have to put it on paper i don't care what the amount is but you got to put it on paper the fact that you're not willing to put a number down and stick to it that's what's scaring her it's not the number it's scaring me too by the by the way. Steven, too, because he's investing in you.

Yeah, I mean, again, I'm not, like, you know, irrational about it. But, like, yeah, I think, I guess you're right. Yeah, you are, because you're not willing to put a limit on it. You're not in Congress. You have to put a limit on it. You feel like a budget is restrictive, yes or no? I mean, a little bit, considering, you know, again, I don't, you know, the way I feel I spend my money, I don't overdo it. But I guess Dave's right. All you got to do is put a number on it.

I don't care. You might be surprised at what she would agree to in terms of the number if you put a number to it. And you agree that there is a point at which you look at yourself in the mirror and you say, no, enough already this month. We're limiting this. I don't care what the number is. I really don't. As long as you're, no, enough already this month. We're limiting this. I don't care what the number is. I really don't. As long as you're not going into debt to do it.

You just, but you can't just be going, I'll just be okay. I'll, I'll, no, no. You have to have a number. Then we're both in agreement. You'll be fine. That's all you got to do to fix this. It's not how much you're spending. It's the fact that you're not willing to put any limit on it at all.

This is The Ramsey Show. People all over the country are discovering a faith-based and budget-friendly way of meeting health care costs through Christian Health Care Ministries. Christian Health Care Ministries, or CHM, is a nonprofit organization that helps members carry one another's burdens with health care expenses, and they have successfully shared each other's medical bills for nearly 40 years. See if CHM is right for you by visiting chministries.org. CHM is a proud sponsor of Dave Ramsey personality is my co-host today here on the air.

Open phones at 888-825-5225. You jump in. We'll talk about your life and your money. Miles is with us. Miles is in Wichita, Kansas. Hey, Miles, how can we help? Hi, Mr. Ramsey. It's an honor and pleasure to speak with you today.

You too. What's up? Well, I would like some advice from you on some purchase opportunities that I've got to buy a home. And with some aspects to my life, I'm wondering if I should pay cash for it or if I should try and get a mortgage or get a loan. I've pretty much got the cash to pay for it, but as a Christian, I'm wondering if I should, because I've got the chance to do that, if I should go ahead and do it or because of the convenience, if I should just go ahead and get a mortgage on it. Um, I'm the, the biggest stickler to my life aspect is I'm 20 years old and I'm going to school part-time. I work full-time with my dad and I've got two or three

businesses besides that. And I'm wondering is, is freeing up, uh, some of the cash for capital for what I do smart, or should I try to keep it available for my businesses, or should I just put all of that capital into that house and keep it there and then just slowly... How much money do you have saved? Right around $100,000. And you're 20 years old? Yes, sir. How'd you do that?

Worked hard. I've been extremely blessed. My parents are very wise in raising me in a way to be debt-free. Work hard. I took your Ramsey course through high school, and just as a general attitude to life, you know, knowing everything is God's and knowing everything that I've got is not mine and just managing it as well as just

keeping my expenses low and saving where I can. You're amazing. That's incredible. So what kind of income are you earning a year between all these things you're doing? So I don't specifically have a lot of income. Like I said, I work with my dad full time. My first real heavy year of work and income that I got from him was pretty much just last year, a year and a half. I took home about $30,000.

And then probably between all the other stuff I do, it's around $10,000. So where did $100,000 come from again? Just pretty much saving. Because that doesn't get to $100,000. Pretty much just saving. I mean, ever since I've been young. I mow lawns. I've been doing that since I was 12 or 13.

Like I said, just being very blessed and and I don't spend a lot of money. Do you live with your mom and dad still? Yes, I do. And that's another aspect of it. As I'm 20 years old, I'm going to school part-time as well. So I'm looking to buy this house as a rental. And then when I graduate in a couple years, try and move into it as my own house. No, I would not buy a house.

Do you think that's the wise place to be? I think the wise thing to do is for you to finish school before you worry about it. I would not get in the rental business. This is the don't get in the rental business while you're in college theme out. We didn't know it was, but it is. Yeah, I wouldn't put you in the rental business while you're making $30,000 a year and trying to go through school. I don't mind you getting there, and you are an overachiever. You're an incredible young man, but let's not get confused about what got us here.

It wasn't real estate. I love real estate, and I want you to own some real estate someday. I thought you were buying this house to move into, so that might have changed the answer, but I don't think it does. I think you're going to continue to pile up money, and you go ahead and get in school and get your butt in gear and get finished. And when you graduate and you leave home and you start your own life and you have a pile of cash, pay cash for your first home that you're going to live in, then start talking about buying rental property that you pay cash for. But I wouldn't get this out of order. I wouldn't get it backwards. It's so

tempting too, I'm sure, Miles, because you have this pile of cash. You have $100,000 so you could rationalize in your head, well, I have this money so I should buy a house. You're living at home. You're fine. Finish out school. Just because you have the money doesn't mean you have to spend it. Just like we were saying earlier, you're in a transitional time in your life. What you need today is not necessarily what you'll need or want in a year or three years.

Finish out school and then make a decision about your housing situation and your money. Yeah. So with rare exceptions, if you never buy a piece of real estate before you're 25 years old,

that's not the end of the world, including your home. Yeah. I mean, you can just move out and rent a little apartment and get your life started. Yeah. This idea that you have to move out into a furnished home with a skylight and a jacuzzi at 24 years old or 23 years old is just, guys, it's not talking down to you because you're young. All I'm saying is just have a little freak and patience.

Well, and one of the things I heard the most out of college, Dave, and I've heard it a million times is you're throwing money away on rent. You're throwing money away on rent. You hear it again and again. That is an oversimplified statement on the situation. What you're buying is time, peace of mind. Someone else is dealing with all the maintenance of the home. There's so much more that goes into home ownership than just the purchase price of the house. And I think a lot of young people don't

consider that. They don't think about a new AC unit or you need a new roof or something goes wrong and all the headache that goes with it, whether you're living in it or not, that you may not want to take on. Being a renter for 15 or 20 years is a bad idea. Being a renter for 36 months while you're going through some transitional periods in your life, like leaving home for the first time, those kinds of things, is not dumb at all. Yeah. It's not dumb at all. Renters don't go to hell. It's not a salvation issue.

Okay? I mean, you're not like done something completely stupid where you've ruined your whole life because you're a renter for a little while um i've rented um you know and i own a bunch of real estate and i believe in real estate and i want you to get some real estate but real estate purchases as an investment is very unwise and will set you back in your whole wealth building process it will set you back not push you forward if you do it before you've done some of these other things. And so it is a late-in-the-game, late-in-the-baby-steps idea that you invest in real estate.

Because otherwise, real estate will kick you in the teeth and will move you backwards in your wealth building. And so, no, you don't need to buy a rental house when you don't have a house that's paid for that you live in your wealth building. And so, no, you don't need to buy a rental house when you don't have a house that's paid for that you live in. No, you don't need to buy a rental house until you have graduated from college. No, you don't need to buy a rental house until you can pay cash for it. No, you don't need to buy a rental house until you're out of debt, own a home, have an emergency

fund in place, and it paid off your home. No, you don't need to buy a rental house before you're 25 unless you're in a very very unusual situation now this young man here is pretty incredible he's done some really cool stuff but here's the thing dude you buy a house right now with all that money and you're not making but 30 grand you don't have any money you gave up all your money because if i thought you were going to tell me in this business you're making a hundred thousand dollars a year or something i didn't know where this money but this has been from 12 years old he saved every yard cutting money yeah and that's how you got here so you're a tremendous saver you are not yet a tremendous earner you will be i think just listening to you i think

you're incredible i think you're going to be a big place when you're but when you're making 60 or 80 000 or 180 000 it makes the this equation completely different and that's where you're making $60,000 or $80,000 or $180,000, it makes this equation completely different. And that's where you're going to be when you graduate with your four-year degree and you have your full-on career and you're doing stuff because you're a dude that gets stuff done. Yeah. But it's okay. Just breathe. Just breathe. You're not going to die.

You're not stupid. You're not throwing money away to rent for 36 months from your 22nd birthday to your 25th birthday. It's just not the end of the freaking world. And that includes those of you getting married. She wants to buy a house or he wants to buy a house. I don't give a crap. You're broke. When broke people buy houses, you get broker.

And that's why they call them real estate brokers. That's where that comes from. And I've done that and lots of people have done that. And we've seen the strain and the coaching over the years. You and I have both seen it over and over and over again. This is The Ramsey Show. Thank you. in the lobby of ramsey solutions on the debt-free stage, Michael and Angela are with us. Hey, guys. How are you?

Good. Great. Awesome to have you. So, here to do a debt-free scream. Where do you live? Faribault, Minnesota, just south of Twin Cities about an hour. Okay. Very cool.

Good. Good for you guys. Well, welcome. How much debt did you pay off? $313,285.06. Love it. How long did this take? About 40 months.

Whoa. And your range of income during that time? We started at $90,000 all the way up to $230,000. Good for you. What do you guys do for a living? I'm an optometrist. And I do agricultural research. Very good.

So what kind of debt was this $313,000? Well, we had $300 in a bed, $30,000 between two vehicles, and the rest was Sally Mae. Lots of Sally Mae. Sally Mae did a number on y'all. Yeah. A big one. Wow. So tell us the story.

What happened? It was a few months after our first daughter was born. We were sitting there, and we were talking about retirement and paying off these loans early and saving for college for our daughter. And I said to Michael, this is overwhelming. We can't do it all. We were going 10 different directions, everywhere. There wasn't a plan. And then I remember my best friend in college, her dad had mentioned a book,

The Total Money Makeover. And so I called her and said, you know, what's this book? We read it. I was on board right away. I thought there were a lot of great ideas in the book and that we could use some of these principles and it might really help us. And then we had our first budget meeting

and there were some things going on with the job and we wrote everything down and we realized there's a lot of debt that was the first time we put all the debt on paper and it was terrifying terrifying terrifying basically we realized we were coming up 800 bucks short every month just on debt. That wasn't even groceries or gas. What'd you do? How'd you get that fixed? We moved. You sold your house.

Well, we moved out. We found a new job opportunity. Basically, Angie was able to get a job where she was making the same where we both were, and we just went. And then I was able to get a job where she was making the same where we both were, and we just went. And then I was able to find a job, and then from there, Angie was able to pick up more jobs, extra jobs. Game on. Wow. So that's what kept this income.

You tripled almost your income. Yeah. Yeah. At one point, I think we were, I don't think I had a day off. A couple months. Yeah. Every day. Every day, every day.

But that's when the snowball really, really rocked. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The problem is you work all the time. The good news is you make a lot of money. You're darn right. You can clean up a mess pretty quick if you get bigger shovels.

Yep. And then you don't have to do it forever. It's just a part-time thing. I mean, it's a temporary process to work like that. But you were working like maniacs. Yes. Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, you could only tweak the budget so much. You know, we were able to get everything out of the budget we could. At that point, you got to up the income. Yeah. Did you sell the cars or keep them? We kept them. Okay. Worked your way through it.

Yep. Good. Very cool. So this really came down to moving to a different city and changing your income potential and then stepping into that potential yep yeah okay two and a half long years three and a half three and a half oh no we wish he's like this guy can do The whole dividing by 12 things are probably, yeah. Oh, my gosh.

That's incredible. So I'm curious because I know a lot of people are scared of that moment you just described when you wrote it all down. They don't want to face it. Because it is scary, right? Like, I think you said it was terrifying when he first faced it. We were blissfully unaware. We had no idea.

Right. Blissfully unaware. That is a great phrase how many people are listening right now that are blissfully unaware and they're scared to face it what would you say to them on this side now having faced it been terrified busted your behinds to get out of it and now you're debt-free speak to that person that doesn't want to write it down that doesn't want to face it you can do doesn't want to face it. You can do it. You can do it. You can do it. We had a gold chart from zero up to our $300,000 debt load,

and it seems overwhelming. But you can do it. You can. I mean, when we found this plan, we were like, this is the greatest thing. Everyone needs to do this. Why isn't everyone doing this? And then we try to explain to people, and they're just like, oh, you know, we can't do that. Or, you know, it works for you.

You know, you guys make a lot of money. And, I mean, that's why we wanted to come here. We're like, you can do it. We can do it. You can do it. You can do it. Go to work. Go to work.

Great place to go when you're broke. Tell work. Amen. That quote went in my head almost every saturday or sunday literally maniacs yeah this is impressive very impressive so how old are you i'm 34 32 okay and you paid off a 313 000 in 40, and you're done. How's it feel? Liberating. We're free.

We're free. It's different going to work that first day after I paid at office. I'm going to work because I want to. It's totally changed the way I am at work, and it's awesome. Yep, me too. You get your hours back to a normal grind now, Angela. Yes, not a Saturday or Sunday ever again. Yeah.

Never again. If you work like no one else later, you can work like no one else. If you live like no one else later, you can live and give like no one else. That's right. You guys are incredible. So it was worth it. Absolutely. 100%. What do you tell people the key to getting out of debt is? I would say

the biggest thing, getting on board with each other, writing everything down. That was huge for us. The budget. I mean, we, every month we were going through that. And the biggest thing for us, I would say, is you have to stay motivated. Three and a half years is a long time. It's a very long time. And we had, like I said, our big gold chart. And every 10%, Michael and I, we would go out on a date night. And then every time, every month when we paid off things, we would have a dream meeting. And we'd say, why are we doing this? You know, what are our future goals? And basically that was our motivation.

Yeah. You know, you'd fill in the chart and it's like, okay, that's another 2%. You know, here we go. You can see the progress. And that was probably, I mean, one of the hardest things is because when you have that much debt, you know, 1% is three grand. Yeah. That's a lot of money.

That's a lot of money. That's serious money, yeah. And yeah, those I would say are the biggest things. Yeah. That's powerful. Yeah. I love that you guys did that. I love that you celebrated those mile markers because y'all's, most people getting out of debt is a marathon.

Y'all's really was a marathon. I mean, three and a half years is a long time. That's a lot of money. But to see that progress and celebrate that progress, it probably motivated you, okay, let's get the next 30,000. Let's get the next 10%, whatever that was. And you stuck with it because of that. Well done. And it was tough too, because we had consolidated all the loans. So it was one payment. We weren't knocking little loans off as we went. So that motivation, it was key. Yeah, yeah. Very cool, you guys.

Well done, well done, well done. Very proud of you. Very proud of you. We got a copy of Rachel Cruz's latest New York Times bestseller, Know Yourself, Know Your Money, as a gift. We appreciate you coming all the way down from Minnesota to do your debt-free scream and share your story. It's inspiring what you've done. You're rock stars. Very, very've done. You're rock stars.

Very, very well done. You're free! You did it! Michael and Angela from Minnesota. $313,000 paid off in 40 months, making $90,000 to $230,000. Count it down. Let's hear a debt-free scream. Three, two, one.

We're dead free! We're dead free! Well done, you guys. Very well done. That's awesome. This is The Ramsey Show. We'll be right back. Richie Wright Ramsey Personality is my co-host today. Our famous $10 sale is back, which means you can get her number one best-selling book, Business Boutique, for $10. You can get the total money makeover, the proximity principle, and most of our best-selling books are on sale for $10 each.

About a 60% saving on over 40 best-selling books. Pretty cool. Go to RamseySolutions.com slash store. RamseySolutions.com slash store. Check out the $10 sale. And there's more. We've got a gift for you. You can enter to win our Ramsey Cash giveaway.

We're giving away $500 cash every week starting this week, plus a grand prize of $5,000 cash. You can enter daily for extra chances to win, no purchase necessary. You've got to be 18 or older to win. Text the word CASH to 33-789, and you can enter now. Text CASH to 33-789, and you can enter now. Text CASH to 33-789. Again, that $10 sale is all going on at RamseySolutions.com slash store. Ken is in Los Angeles.

Hi, Ken. Welcome to the Ramsey Show. Hi, Dave. Thanks for taking my call. Sure. How can we help? Well, I'm a bit nervous. I'll just do my best to ask the question and hopefully get some good life and financial advice from you. Okay.

I've been working for myself for almost 20 years in the financial services industry. My income over the last few years has done real well, except for the last maybe year or so, it's been declining, in part because of the company I work for and represent is not doing super great. So I've been working really hard to pay off the house early. We're not in any debt whatsoever other than our mortgage. And we're at a crossroads, my wife and I and our family, as to whether we should potentially leave Los Angeles, leave California, and move out of state to an area that's obviously less expensive to accelerate my financial goals and, you know, my wife's financial goals, I guess, as well, even though we're not always on the same page.

Or just to stick it out here and essentially use the money that I've saved to pay the house off. We're almost right there to pay the house off. And instead of paying the house off, use the money to try and stimulate some income in other ways, entrepreneurial ways or something. How much money you got saved? About $320,000. Way to go. Okay. So the only reason I use the phrase in my life, stick it out,

is there has to be a prize on the other side of sticking it out. What's the prize on the other side of sticking it out in Los Angeles? It sounds like you're just going to endure to the end of your life and then you die. You know, that's a good question. You know, I mean, if we were sitting down with my wife and you, we would both admit to ourselves that more than likely California is not our future. Even though this is where we grew up, this is our home, obviously the list is really long as to the reasons why to leave. You occasionally allude to them on your program.

But no, I mean, our kids, our oldest is in high school, and we do really enjoy the area that we're in. He's got a good set of friends, which is really important, I think, you know, good social support group. So as far as taking it out, what I mean by that is like, you know, for the next few years or so while our oldest gets through high school, and then more than likely we would be probably exiting. Okay. All right. And so your oldest is what year in high school? He's a sophomore.

Okay. So you either leave now or you leave in two years? More like four to five. Why? Because we've got a middle schooler. Oh, you're going to run all of them out. That's about to go into high school, yeah. Yeah.

I'm curious about something you said a second ago. You said my financial goals and I guess my wife's financial goals, but you said it separately, like you all are on the same page. What are some of these conversations about? Yeah, so complicated, but I mean, we're not 100%. I've been listening to Dave, your show, for years, ever since I decided I need to make some lifestyle changes. My wife, generally speaking, is very supportive of things we do. We have a great marriage. However, at the same time, she looks at our situation as, like, you know, very unique,

meaning, you know, able to pay a house off, an expensive house in Los Angeles in the early 40s, very blessed, and, you know, she misses i and i do want to support her i mean we i've we've sacrificed a lot you know seeing friends take vacations yeah um we're not you know um our kids are getting older and she's it's getting a little bit uh challenging for her to to continue to i i would say live house poor to some degree i think that you guys have been on a financial planner's tightwad budget and she's over it yeah yeah you could say that okay and i am too to be honest i know but here's the thing here's the thing the offset of the kids being moved is that your quality of life on a daily basis and an annual basis is going to increase considerably yeah in other words

the kids are going to go on vacation the kids are not going to be seeing mom and dad dad particularly who's pretty much miserable there uh and and all through my high school years all i remember was my dad was miserable yeah i'm out of there dude yeah Just based on what you're telling me. And I think the impact, and I would move tomorrow. I think the impact on your kid, resetting some friends. Kids do it all the time. I mean, there's lots of people who move with a kid in high school, and they survive. And, you know, is it ideal?

No, it's not ideal. But is there a good set of friends with the proper value systems that you get plugged into in a city that is where you can explore your career options? Your wife can be allowed to go on vacation. You guys have got a little wiggle room in your budget to go out and do some things that you've not been doing lifestyle-wise. And you pay cash for a house for $300,000 when you make the move and you start a new career. It's a new adventure for everyone, and everyone's getting an upgrade in this model, except the kid is getting a bit of a down, but overall, the kid's getting an upgrade. Yeah, and they may not understand at first. They probably won't, but you're their parent.

You get to make the decisions for what's best for the family, and if this is what you and your wife decide is best for your family for all of these reasons you're putting their life at risk or something would be different you're just changing high school yeah i mean i'm sorry i'm old you are it's not it's not get over it i'm you know you'll be all right you're gonna make it they will and when they're on the other side of it they will get to experience that they just can't see past friday night right now they're they're teenagers that's how teenagers think and act. They'll be glad on the other side of it. There will be some whining and gnashing of teeth.

There will. You know that will be there. But I'm telling you, I think the quality of your family unit, I think Dr. John Deloney would tell us that the vibe in your house, your kids pick up on the vibe. Yeah, it'll be overall worth it. They pick up on the stress that's in the air. They pick up on the stress that's in the air they pick up on the disappointment that's in the air the gritted teeth i'm gonna stick it out that's in the air that's right and so i wouldn't stick it out yeah it's it's done

you and your wife are both done but for different reasons uh the only thing holding you there is a sophomore in high school sophomore in high school gets to go along on this adventure. That's the way it is with the Ramseys. We're going to explain it to them. But, I mean, I'm not being mean or uncaring. You can certainly, we can empathize with the young person's feelings. That's not the point. We don't have to be mean about it or just act like it doesn't matter.

It does matter, but their upgrade, if they turn their attitudes about this in the right direction, is going to far. I mean, they're going to have parents who aren't stressed, parents who are living the dream, lifestyle increases, you know, a different environment to live in. And it could be an adventure. Yeah. And I think when you're in the weeds of decisions like that, sometimes it can be so hard to sort through your options and all the different variables. But even like you said, which is more important? That you keep the sophomore in high school, the middle schooler through the school system, or that you're happy and enjoy every aspect of your life? It sounds like five years of hell.

Yeah. It's like this is going to affect everything. When you look at it like that, you go, oh. And the only benefit is the kid doesn't change friend sets. Right. That's the only thing. We're going through five years of hell so a middle schooler doesn't change friend sets. Right. That's the only thing. We're going through five years of hell, so a middle schooler doesn't change friend sets. I'm done with this.

No, I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't do it. I'm sorry. Hey, man, I appreciate you. You've got a good heart, and you're thinking this through. You wanted some input. You got it, and it's probably worth what you paid for it. This is The Ramsey Show.

Hey, it's Kelly, associate producer and phone screener for The Ramsey Show. If you would like to do your debt-free scream live on the show, make sure you visit theramseyshow.com and register. We would love for you to come to Nashville and tell Dave your story.