The Ramsey Show - App - I Was Stuck With an RV After a Divorce (Hour 2)

Episode Date: September 24, 2021

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Live Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studios, it's the Ramsey Show, where debt is dumb, cash is king, and the paid off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW as the status symbol of choice. I'm Dave Ramsey, your host, Dr. John Deloney. Ramsey Personality is my co-host today.

Open phones at 888-825-5225. That's 888-825-5225. Danny is going to start off this hour in Harrisonburg, Virginia. Hi, Danny. How are you? Hi, gentlemen. I'm doing great. I'm a little starstruck.

Dave, I've got to say I've listened to you for years and started when I took Financial Peace University. And my buddies give me a hard time whenever we go out to get a bite or something. They say, I don't know, is that Papa Dave approved? Oh, that's cold. Well, we're honored to have you, sir. How can we help today? All right. So the condensed version, I'm wondering if I should buy a house that I do not want.

So a little back story. My wife and I have been looking for a house for the past year. Financially, we feel prepared as much as we can be. We're in baby step four. We have a good chunk of change set down. There is just no inventory in our area. And I finally broke today when I got a call that a house we put a really competitive offer on, it went above.

It went no inspection. It went guaranteed their offer price. And so just feeling frustrated. So I don't know if we should just keep waiting. Our landlord is selling the house we live right now, and so we're going to be kicked out. So we're a little worried. Do we find a place to rent and pay more than what a mortgage would be, or do we settle on a townhome or something really small that we just don't like?

I just went through this. Yeah, yeah i know so what's the answer no no what don't buy a house you don't like yeah don't do that because you're going to wake up in 12 months or 24 months 12 hours 12 yeah 12 i don't like this house oh wait i never liked this house what the heck did i do and you're gonna it's like trying to date somebody that you know you have a future with you just I don't like this house. Oh, wait. I never liked this house. What the heck did I do? It's like trying to date somebody that you know you'll have a future with, and you just think, I'll change them. I'll change them, and I'll grow to love them. That bathroom's not going to move in that house.

It's still going to be there. It is. Yeah. I hate this for you. Listen, I just went through this. It was brutal. It's a frustrating experience in the market right now it really really is so this is your first home correct and you're how old uh i'm 28 my wife's 25 every time i face something like this i read a study like gosh it probably 20 years ago. And it affected my decision-making paradigm ever since.

Here's what the study said. It said that people who build wealth and become wealthy make decisions based on how it's going to affect them 10, 20, 30 years from now. People who are broke make decisions based on how it's going to feel this weekend. Yeah. Thank God it's Friday. Oh, God how it's going to feel this weekend yeah thank god it's friday oh god it's monday is what broke people say but rich people when they get ready to buy a watch they say can i wear this for 10 years 20 years can i get some or when they get ready to buy

they buy high they buy expensive things sometimes but they buy high value things that last that's right poor people buy uh and broke people and i've been both but broke people buy stuff that looks good right now but that's cheap as crap and falls apart you know and so it's kind of the same decision making they thank god it's friday oh god it's money i'm gonna blow all my money on the weekend because I'm a child. And so emotionally. So the way I back up on something like you're looking at when I'm frustrated and tired and feel boxed out by the market, which is all the things you feel. And it's your first house. And, man, we're going to pay more in rent.

We're going to move twice because I got to go rent something. Then I'll find something right after I rent something and all that. Then, you know, so what this tells you, when I pan back, I go, what's the best decision 10 years from now? Don't buy a house you don't like. And, man, it's hard, especially with my wife saying I need a home. I've got two little kids running around. It's real, real hard to be patient.

Talk to your landlord and go, hey, if i pay you a couple hundred dollars more a month would you rent for me for six more months yeah buy yourself a little time that's right and um or go somewhere for a weekend just go on a quick little getaway do something just to kind of clear the deck white the white erase the whiteboard and you gotta start over again this is the worst possible time to feel like you're forced in to buy something right because the market's gone bananas meaning people have gone bananas they're nuts yeah i mean they're like running down the street and driving a steak in the yard this one's mine you know it's crazy the way they're acting and it's just a freaking house yeah i mean you can get you another one. There's one on every corner. But, no, don't settle.

Don't cheap out. Because if you buy some kind of crappy something, because that's what's available in this market, you know what it's going to be when you get ready to sell it? Something that's crappy that's available in a hard-to-sell market. You're going to get stuck. Well, and beyond that, you tell me. When you buy an ugly house at a deal, and you know what it is when you get ready to sell it yeah that's you're gonna get stuck well and beyond that you tell me when you buy an ugly house at a deal and you know what it is when you get ready to sell it an ugly house at a deal well and you tell yourself all these these fantasies like we'll just move

those bathrooms we'll build an add-on garage and get a new roof none of that will happen and you set yourself up for so much disappointment when you're there it's such a good discussion though and that's why we're leaning on it a little bit and giving giving a little bit more time because there's so much activity in the market so many people are feeling this listen if you feel like you're you're the temperature on your forehead is changing that's called house fever it's back away you know you need to go take a cold shower back away from the contract you know you're about to overpay you're about to buy something you're about to settle for something you don't like and that's everybody out there man you're just you're just an example of everybody that's walking around looking at houses right now

the opportunity to overpay is legitimate and yes moving twice but you know let me tell you 10 years now, you won't even remember it. No, you won't. Or you'll remember how bad it was, but it's 10 years later. Who cares? Yeah, we rented a house. We sold our house after bankruptcy. Our kids were in these private schools.

We moved to another county to get in better schools, and we rented. The first time I'd ever rented since I'd owned. And I'd owned 1,000 pieces of property by then and gone broke right now I'm a renter that kitchen in that rental house it was a not it was a big old house it was a reasonably nice house and it was a great school system which was with the whole goal right and we cashed out of our other house and cleared up the rest of the rest of our debt after the bankruptcy paid off the stinking IRS right but to this day when I mention that street name my wife's face gets a cloud across it and all she says is that kitchen that kitchen that kitchen that nasty brown linoleum floor that kitchen

that kitchen because i mean she hated hey but she transferred that house she transferred that husband to that kitchen so that's actually good for you. It's good for everybody. He went broke, and we were in that kitchen. That's right. You're right. She hated the kitchen instead of Dave. That's good.

She kept the ire on the correct item. Yes, that's good. I mean, that's 30 years ago, man. It hangs with you. And I've bought a house under pressure, and I still to this day regret that I did that. It's still an ugly house. I put my family through it. I bought an ugly house, and it was still an ugly house when I got ready to sell it.

I've done that. I've done it. Don't do it. Just take your time, brother. I know it's hard. Take a cold shower. Take your time. This is the Ramsey Show. I'm sure most of you have seen the news recently about ransomware, cybercrimes, identity theft, and more and more data breaches.

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They even provide $1 million in stolen funds protection, and kids are free on their family plan. Go to Zander.com or call 800-356-4282. This is the Ramsey Show. It's about your life and making it better. Thanks for being with us. Open phones at 888-825-5225. Dr. John Deloney is my co-host today. Anna is with us in Houston.

Hi, Anna. How are you? I'm good. How are you doing, Dave? Better than I deserve. What's up? So, I found you about, oh gosh, maybe a month ago. I've got a bit of a question, I guess. I lost my husband about four months ago. Oh, I'm so sorry, Anna.

Thank you. You know, just dealing with everything. He had a 401k account with his work that's been, I guess, converted to an IRA. I have some savings in, you know, my own 401k. I've gone through the baby steps and I'm telling me that, you know, I'm putting money away for retirement,

all that good stuff. The only thing left is the house at this point so I don't know if it makes sense to keep the you know the IRA and the for my 401k as is and let it do what it needs to do excuse me and just start paying down my debt out of my house I guess out of my you know just my regular paychecks or cash some of it out but then then there's taxes and whatnot due on that money to do that. Or is it just, you know, small and steady, just pay down the house as I go along? How old are you? 41. What?

41. 41. Oh, okay. I thought you said 21. So what happened? What happened to him? Cancer. Oh, I'm sorry.

Long fight? About two years. Yeah. He fought it. He fought it, you know, to the end. Yeah. I'm sorry. It was tough.

How long were you all married? 16 years. 16 and a half, actually. And how much debt do you have, not counting your house? Nothing, nothing, everything. Oh, it's just the house? No debt, just the house. And how much is in the 401Ks and retirement and all that? His was $150,000.

Mine is $100,000. Okay. What do you make? About $140,000. Good for you. What do you do? I'm in finance, actually. Okay.

And what do you owe on your home? $300,000. Okay. So his $150,000 rolled to an inherited IRA, correct? Correct,000. Okay. And so his $150,000 rolled to an inherited IRA, correct? Correct, yes. Okay. So it can come out without any penalties but with taxes at any time, by the way. Right, that's what they told me.

Yeah, at any time. Yeah, that's what they told me to do. And you're also required to remove it systematically over the next so many years. They have a required minimum distribution on it and they just changed it i can't think what it is off the top of my head but um it's like five years or something you're gonna be pulling it anyway oh oh okay i didn't know that okay they just changed it about 18 months ago and uh used to be like over 30 years but now it's over maybe maybe 10 years but it's a shorter period of time. Anyway. And we got children?

I have a son, yes. What age? 13. Okay. All right. And you have other savings other than these two accounts? I have an emergency fund set aside in, in like a savings account um and just you know cash like you know in and out whatever's in the bank um well i can tell you this sharon and i've

been married almost 40 years um our estate plan is predicated on me dying first because she has planned it that way but but uh in case that doesn happen, I'll tell you how I'm going to react. I'm going to be useless for a while if she were to pass away before me. And 16 years is not that much different. It's just you have some days that are okay, and other days you still can't breathe, right? Yes, exactly right. And so I try not to make big financial decisions until I get at least six months of that behind me to where I can breathe better and the fog on my brain lifts a little bit.

The good news is there's nothing rushing this decision, and so you can take that inherited IRA without penalties and do it two years from now, two months from now, two days from now, if you want, and put it on this house. You don't have to decide today. And since you don't have to decide today, I'm going to recommend you try not to decide today. Okay. And just give yourself some room to cry, John.

Yeah. There's going to be this pressure to wrap a bow around all this and anna that's not how this grief is going to play out for you okay you're going to want to come back you're going to want to yeah you want to come back to the spreadsheets and to i need to do this i need to do this i need to do this and there's a difference between i need to and I have to. And right now you don't have to deal with this. And I'm with Dave six months to a year.

What you don't have to do, don't touch it right now. Yeah. And then, you know, at that point, there may be something else opening up in front of you. And you may go, I want to reach over and try to get this house paid off. That's my next big financial goal, which is not a bad goal at all. That and the kids' college are your only two goals left that are substantial goals, and I want you to hit both of them, and you're going to hit both of them. You make really good money.

You're going to be just fine. There's nothing – there's no question about your survivability here. I mean, in terms of financial, you've got plenty of money. You make good money. You've got some money, and you don't have any debt, and so you're in a really, really good place in regard to that. There was no life insurance. No, no.

No life insurance, is that right? Correct, correct. Okay, all right. Okay, so I'm just making sure I wasn't missing something here. But I think still, yeah, let's just ride it a little while. Okay. I wasn't missing something here. But I think still, yeah, let's just ride it a little while. And just put it in your calendar that in January you're going to begin to think about it and pray about it again. In the meantime, you're just going to live and cry.

And, Anna, remember when you were pregnant with your little one, how much nonsensical, unhelpful, but good intended advice you got from everybody at the grocery store. It doesn't matter, right? Somebody saw somebody pregnant and they had some advice for you. It's been similar, hasn't it? About you need to be doing this. Have you thought about this, right?

There is not a right way to do this except your way through this, okay? And love that baby of yours. And you are strong and brilliant and powerful. Y'all have been fighting for two years. This raging river will turn into a creek at some point, and it's not going to be tomorrow. And so there's not a right way to do it.

Get some people around you and walk every day. Make those decisions later, okay? How old did you say your son was again? 13. 13. Perfect. Perfect. Yeah. Okay, so what I want you guys to do, I'm going to give you Ramsey Plus for a year. Oh, thank you.

And it's where you can learn how to handle money. You probably already know how. But you can go through Financial Peace University. You can get on the EveryDollar. And you can train him. Let him go through it with you. This is going to be a new adventure that you all can do together. And you can both learn how to handle money. You can train him, and you can get polished up if you already know how.

And, you know, as Christians, we're supposed to take care of widows, and I am. So we're going to take care of you today. And you hang on. Kelly will pick up. We'll put you into Ramsey Plus. That gives you Financial Peace University, Legacy Journey, Smart Money, Smart Kids. It gives you all the classes. It also gives you EveryDollar. It gives you community. It gives Legacy Journey, Smart Money, Smart Kids. It gives you all the classes. It also gives you every dollar.

It gives you community. It gives you access to coaches and get questions answered. But don't do that out of feeling a pressure to. This is just kind of part of you getting some more tools in your belt while you're spending this year healing. And as we talked about with the last call, no pun intended, but it's a little baby step in a new direction of a thing, right? And it's something you can do together. And it's just, hey, let's watch a video tonight. Let's do some of the assignments.

Let's begin to slowly take these crooked steps in a new direction towards a new adventure. And suddenly you'll look up nine weeks, two, three months later, and you've got a little bit taller. You've got a new relationship adventure that you've just joined in with your son it's a whole new direction here yeah 13 year old can definitely graduate from this class oh yeah and he'll remember doing it with mom yeah during a really in a shadowed season a year from hell that's right yeah but it set me up to be a man that's right and um mom helped guide me through that so that's cool yeah's good stuff. Hey, Anna, you call us anytime we can help. We're here.

Anytime you've got a question, babe, we're here. And we've got your back. We'll help you any way we can. So hang on. Kelly will pick up, and we'll get you guys signed up for that. The little boy's lucky to have you, Anna. so Hey, it's Christi Wright. Y'all, let's be honest. When it comes to our quiet time with God,

sometimes it's hard to know where to start. You've heard me talk about the Glorify app before, and there's a reason. For me, it has been a game changer, helping me grow in my faith every day. Every morning, Glorify guides me through God's Word with a bite-sized Bible reading, a daily devotional, and a guided reflection that helps me connect with God. And

it's free to download. So if you haven't already, give Glorify a try. Just search for Glorify in Oh, I love it. In the lobby of Ramsey Solutions on the debt-free stage, Gabriel is here to do a debt-free scream. Hey, Gabriel, how are you? Hello, I'm doing wonderful. How are you today, Dave and Dr. John? Better than we deserve. Brother, where do you live?

I live in a little township outside of Cleveland, Ohio. Oh, fun. That's a bit of a haul to Nashville. Yes, it was a beautiful drive the whole way down. Oh, that's nice. How much debt have you paid off? I paid off $88,000 in student loan debt. How long did this take you? This took me 34 months. Good for you. And your range of income during that three years, approximately? Yes, that would be $42,000, scaling up to $58,000. Excellent. What do you do for a living? I am a software engineer for a real estate company that's also located outside of Cleveland, Ohio.

Good for you. Well done, dude. Well done. So what was the 88? You said student loan. It's all student loans? It's all student loans. And it was a little bit bigger than I wanted because I did a major change halfway through college, and that adds an extra year. So that's a little extra debt.

What's your degree in? Computer science. Of course of course good and then you're using it and everything yeah so three years ago you had what feels like an insurmountable debt and you're making 42 000 what made you look at that and say i can do this um definitely looking at it and saying you got to get started somewhere so getting hired right off the bat and saying, well, this is time. I racked up all this debt over the four years. My degree helped me get my job, so it's time to put it to work and pay the debt off. Stop it with your accountability and responsibility, man. We just can't have this.

Yes. So what are you, 29, 28? Close, 27. 27. All right, good. Very cool. He's not only that, he's a responsible millennial. So annoying. You're messing up all of my stuff, man.

All your stereotypes are getting screwed up here. That's exactly right. And he actually had a plan, and he executed the plan. Golly. Wow. I'm so proud of you, man. Yeah, thank you. Who was your biggest cheerleader? Biggest cheerleaders, I got a couple people to reference.

One of the big ones is definitely my mother, who's with me today my mom my whole family come down to represent got friends i got an uncle and aunt that said oh you're paying off debt let's find some homework that we can pay you to do got another aunt that helped me let me know of job opening position so i could get an extra job in the final year and really knock out the debt so thanks to all of them wow wow so everybody got behind you and gave you a lift. Yes. That's beautiful, man. So there is nothing cool about finally getting out of college at 24

and getting your first job and then saying, I'm going to be in it for 36 months with no dates, no going out, no running around. I'm just going to knock this out. What kept you going every single day? Every single date, definitely looking that at some point you're not gonna owe anybody money and it just alleviates all the pain of finding uh money here to go do something fun there because you're restricted by debt and those payments that you need to make so that liberating feeling is definitely what i looked forward to you kept looking at that long

game yeah yeah the long game it wasn't that easy off the start because uh the biggest thing that i found was there's a difference between dave ramsey's gazelle intense and gabriel's gazelle and hey listen gabe there's a difference between dave's and everybody's but yes you're right it started that first year making 42 and then you look down and you're like all right i'll make double payments on my student loans this is going to be fantastic and then you look down and you're like, alright, I'll make double payments on my student loans. This is going to be fantastic. And then you get through and you get to 2019 and all of a sudden you're like, I should re-budget the whole year and see how good I did.

And I paid off $14,000 that first year and I'm like, that's not bad. Listen to Dave Ramsey while on the treadmill and all of a sudden I'm like, I could be doing better. So I re-ran those numbers, budgeted those four things and I actually found out $10,000 I couldn't tell you where I spent it in 2018. Wow.

Oh! And like you say, you do a budget, you give yourself a raise. I got a $10,000 raise, tacked that onto the 14, stretched every dollar a little bit farther, paid off... Six, eight jobs? Yeah. Yeah. $30,000 the next year, and then I got those extra jobs going into the third year of 2020,

and then I paid off 44 of the remaining debt in that final year. Wow, that's a curve right there, baby. Yep, power of the snowball. You're kicking it. Dude. You are kicking it. Well, it was more of the snowball. It was intensity snowball.

Yeah, that's a snowplow. Sacrifice. Well done, sir. Very, very well done. Okay, so you're a professional now. Yes. $88,000 paid off. You're a professional get eighty eight thousand dollars paid off you're a professional get out of debt guy tell america how do you get out of that um for me what worked best

i'm a numbers guy i had spreadsheets i made my own amortization charts so every payday when i sent it off to pay parent minus loans or government loans is like all right you know i only got 24 payments left and then 23 payments left but having that visualization really helps i also have my um debt free payment sheet here so every time ding ding paid them off just there's the refrigerator magnet yeah baby visualization that that's what helped me get through it being able to see and actually say all right we're getting closer it's gonna happen you know it's gazelle intense when he didn't pull out an 80 dream journal he pulled out a single sheet of notebook paper it was like done yeah six folds yeah you mentioned this guy's incredible hitting the treadmill what are some ways you kept yourself sane and whole during this time that's a long time to sprint it is um definitely finding activities

that don't require a lot of money are really good. So anything that has to do with a little bit of charity work, doing mountain biking, that's free. Going on nature walks, staying home, watching movies with friends and family. It's being active and enjoying life, just not with the super lucrative end of it for a short amount of time. Yeah. So what's the biggest thing you're going to splurge on now that you've paid off $88,000? Oh, geez. I could spend a while talking about it. I already got it all budgeted out and things.

But ideally, I'm saving up now. I got my emergency fund, so we're saving for a home. But after we get that home, I already have everything picked out for my home theater setup that I'll probably have one day. Ah, this is going to be a home theater. Wow, this is going to be the real deal. It's going to be a massive home theater. Your neighbors are not going to be glad you moved in. That's good.

I already planned on soundproofing the walls walls so they won't hate me that much you're awesome oh i'm so proud of you brother well done very very well done well we got a copy of rachel cruz's book for you know yourself know your money our latest new york times bestseller congratulations you're a hero man you did it you took control of your life in a culture where uh the the stereotypical news feed is that your generation is lost and can't do anything and you proved all of that wrong just by taking the taking the reins of the horse and riding it well done i'm so proud of you thank you well well done gabriel from cleveland ohio 88 000 paid off in 34 months making 42 to 58 count it down brother let's hear a debt-free scream three two one i'm debt-free I love it. Wow. That is fun, fun stuff.

Open phones at 888-825-5225. Jason is with us in Norfolk. Hi, Jason. Welcome to the Ramsey Show. Hi, Dave. How are you doing? Good, man. What's up?

Well, I'm calling for a couple of reasons my wife and i are working on purchasing or building a house and we've been doing their program for now for a little while we've paid down i think nine or ten accounts and we are in baby step number two and i think it's been around $42,000 that we've paid down in combined. Now the problem is this, is that the land that we're building on was deeded to us from families specifically to be used for that kind of thing and we're looking to get our house and stuff like that. But we have now the only three accounts left are our two cars and a trailer, RV trailer, that I got stuck with with a previous marriage.

Now I owe too much on it than what it's worth. And so we're trying to find out what to do and where we go. What do you owe on it? We've been snowballing everything. What do you owe on it? Doing that. 27. What's it worth?

Well, I was told by some people people 19 and i've been told 12. okay so you need to borrow the difference or have the difference what's your household income we make about 152 right now that's good news you can come up with a ten thousand dollar difference and get the thing sold yeah we, we're working on that. Is it up for sale? Is it up for sale? Not at the moment. I have it at a friend's house because our current place we rent is an HOA, and I haven't been able to get it here to prepare it for sale,

and I don't have a truck anymore to tow it. How long has it been sitting at the friend's house? About a year. I'm calling bull crap. You need to get your butt in the car and go over and get that thing cleaned up and get it up for sale, man. Get your $10,000 scraped together. Quit hanging on to your old marriage, brother.

This thing needs to go bye-bye, and some of these cars need to go bye-bye, and you don't need to be building a house until you get this mess cleaned up. You need to stay in that rental house until that happens. Time to get focused, dude. You're eating around the edges. You need to bite right in the middle of the apple here. This is The Ramsey personality, best-selling author, is my co-host today. Open phone to 888-825-5225.

Drelin is with us in Columbus, Ohio. Hey, Drelin, what's up? Hey, guys, how you doing? Better than we deserve, sir. How can we help? So, basically, I'm finally in a position now where i can save i've been living paycheck to paycheck since i graduated um two years ago um but the fact that i can save now i have a car loan that is driving me crazy um my car loan i have ten thousand nine hundred dollars left for this car loan and it's a 16% interest rate.

And I know that's pretty high, but the reason I, the reason I accepted it is because I didn't have any American credit at the time. Right. So I figured after a year I can refinance it, but because I'm Canadian, by the way, I know that might've sounded a little bit weird, but, um, I, I was going to refinance it. But I got approved for it based on my credit. But my employment history isn't long enough. So I just feel like I'm stuck. What do you make?

What's your income? So right now, it will be around $40,000. Okay. And you're working 40 hours? No. Now I'm pushing it to around 50 hours a week. For $40,000? Yeah, so I just started in home renovation, and I'm in a laborer,

so I'm at a pretty low position. I'm working my way up. Okay. But you're paid by the hour? $15,000. Yeah, you're paid so much an hour. So if you work more, you get more money. Yeah, exactly.

Okay, good. Can you get any more hours? Yeah, I can get a little bit more hours, but at the moment I just made a partnership. I'm about to launch a landscaping company as well, so I'm going to have more income coming in through that. Okay, good. Okay. And how old are you i'm 27 okay well here's what i would do if i were in your shoes i would say

16 every morning me being charged 16 interest pisses me off. Yeah. And I stay mad all day. Draylon, you said this is driving you crazy. It drives me crazy on your behalf. Yeah, I'm just hearing it. I'm going crazy. So if that's the case, then I could make a pretend thing in my head and say, gosh, if I don't pay off $10,000 in four months, I'm going to, like, if I don't pay off $10,000 in four months, I'm going to like

die of a disease or something. I mean, you know, just, I mean, what if you had to find $10,000 in four months to stay alive? You would find $10,000 in four months. You would work like hundreds of hours, thousands of hours. You would not worry about anything except getting $10,000, right? Yeah. That's what I want you to do okay you wouldn't recommend selling the car i would recommend paying your car off in four months because all you do is work and you don't have to worry you're not going to die from hard work right before you die you'll pass out

you're going to be fine you're going gonna be fine because here's the thing uh the good news is you did something really stupid you did it at 27 so you have the whole rest of your life to never do that one again yeah okay and that's the way i look at me losing everything when i was 28 and bankrupting i you know there's a whole bunch of stupid stuff I did in that story that I spent the rest of my life not doing and consequently have been able to become very wealthy after that. Because if you can just not repeat the stupid stuff, that is an accomplishment for most people.

And four months. I like the idea, Dave, of just putting a 16% in like a marker on your mirror every morning. Yeah. And just like, because you're going to work like an absolute animal. Yeah. I mean, you're going to go for, but you can do anything for four months. Especially when you're 27. You can do anything for four months.

It's not four years. It's not 40 years. I don't want you to be a workaholic. I don't want you to be out of balance with your life. I don't want you to lose Jesus and your kids and your family. I'm not talking about, I'm talking about four months. Pay your car off. Yeah.

And then you reverse this ridiculous mistake because the car is not ridiculous. Now, if you told me you owed $30,000 on the car and you made $40,000, I'd be going, dude, sell the car. That's just nuts. But it's not that expensive a car as a percentage of $40,000. It's just this glaring idiot idiot idiot it just reminds you every morning that reminds me of my stupidity it's like just i get an email every morning you're stupid you know i hate stuff like that and it just it would drive me bananas and so yeah that's

that's how i want you to let this become a healthy righteous anger that causes you to drive through this four months and clean this mess up. And that's how I would do it if I can't work up in your shoes. Kyle is with us. Kyle's in Amarillo. Hi, Kyle. How are you?

Hi, I'm good. Good. How can we help? So my question was, how does a spender learn how to get in the habit of saving? Just because I love to spend, I have a habit of just spending and spending and spending. And since now that I'm 19, I've got to get in the habit of saving while I'm young instead of keeping that habit of spending, spending, spending. Okay.

Well, I'm a spender too, so I can relate to that. Are you a spender or a saver? You're a. Well, I'm a spender, too, so I can relate to that. Are you a spender or a saver? You're a spender. I'm a spender. You're a spender. Yeah, Sheila's a saver. Yeah. So there's a couple of things.

You need a reason to do it, a why. And right now you don't really have a reason other than this feels like it's wrong. But when I went broke and I had to learn, okay, I know I'm not a natural saver, but saving money seems wise versus being broke, which is kind of what you're saying, Kyle, right? And so how do I do that? Well, what I figured out was most spenders, too, by the generous are you fairly generous yes i love being generous okay so what i figured out is if i invest and save i have more money to spend and more money to be generous with so it's like i i have a reason now to save and systematically save to become

wealthy because i can increase my generosity and i can increase my enjoyment with spending and so i can spend now and not think anything about it versus spending and having this like financial hangover the next morning wake up with a headache and go what did i do last night practically speaking kyle there's been seasons in my marriage where i literally give my debit card to my wife because i take cash and put my wallet so when it's gone i it is gone you set yourself a system to protect you from you put barriers in front of me until i it's like bumper lanes at the pool and i mean when you're uh bowling i'm sorry not the pool when you're bowling

so that i can learn i I need these guardrails. And that's me as a grown-up. I should know better. With a PhD in psychology, by the way. I've got to put some barriers in front of me so that I can get myself back on track. Yeah, put systems in your life that help you stay tuned to your goal. Right. to your goal right and uh you know and and so okay my goal is uh i i want to be a be a be a spender that's who i am but i want to do that with it with wisdom right and i my goal

is i want to be a saver so what do you do to what has to be true to cause that to happen and you know an example would be an auto draft uh out of your checking account directly into a mutual fund that automatically saves for you see that's a system that turns you into a saver because you might not remember to do it that's why you tell people to cut up the credit card so you can't right chop them up that's right plastic surgery the same thing works for um your marriage right i got a few buddies that a hundred percent of the time they call they will i know they're gonna ask hey man how's your marriage are you how y'all doing and there it's it's again it's a it's an accountability it's a check-in how are

things going i know that's gonna happen every time we call right yeah and so it's having setting up those systems in your life that none of us are perfect not all of us are trying to figure it out and but i know where i want to go so i know i've got to have these accountability systems in my life i'm so much of a spender that i used to think when you were leaving costco or sam's and they check your receipt that they were checking to see if you really spent two hundred dollars no you were you want to know if you won that day would you check see if i want to just scratch off the biggest one just the biggest one today like no dave sorry i gotta go but yeah know if you won that day. Would you check, see if I won? Is this scratch off? Is this the biggest one? Is this the biggest one today?

No, Dave. Sorry. I've got to go. If you don't spend $200, they point the finger back into the building and go, go get the six gallons of mustard. There was a family of nine that beat you earlier, Dave. You need six gallons of mustard. Everyone needs six gallons of mustard, and you're not up to your $200.

Go back in there. Five gallons of peanut butter. 55-gall there. Five gallons of peanut butter. 55 gallon oil drum full of peanut butter. Oh. This is The Ramsey Show. This is James Child, producer of The Ramsey Show. did you know the ramsey show is one of the most popular podcasts in the world subscribe or follow today wherever you listen to podcasts