The Ramsey Show - App - I'm Having Boundary Issues With My In-Laws (Hour 2)

Episode Date: July 22, 2020

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Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studios, it's the Dave Ramsey Show, where debt is dumb, cash is king, and the paid-off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW as the status symbol of choice. Open phones at 888-825-5225. Christy Wright, Ramsey Personality, is my co-host today here on the Dave Ramsey Show. We're taking your questions about your life and your money. 888-825-5225. Chase starts us out in Kansas City this hour.

Hi, Chase. How are you? I'm good, Dave. How are you? Better than I deserve. How can Christy and I help? Okay, quick back story. So when I was 14 years old, I started this lawn and landscape company.

I'm now 28, and I've grown it to be pretty successful. And me and my fiance are looking at moving away here in the next couple years, so I'm going to be selling it. So my question is, what kind what kind of like legal advice do i need to like sell a business i mean i'm giving myself a couple years notice to start taking the steps going forward to get this ball rolling basically legal advice, do you have it as an LLC? Yes, it's an LLC. I guess, like, should I talk to an attorney? Like, I don't really know how to sell this type of business

because it's not like a brick-and-mortar building. Well, I mean, the LLC owns the equipment and owns the customers and owns the cash flow. Correct. So you would just simply sell the LLC. You would sell the shares in the LLC for the amount that is agreed to. I gotcha. I gotcha. Do you have any business debt? There's no business debt whatsoever. I have roughly probably 80,000 in assets like equipment. The business last year grossed, or not gross,

netted about 83, and then this year it's going to net probably like 110. Okay. And is that after it paid you or before it paid you? That is after it paid me. What did it pay you? I pay myself a salary of roughly 5,000 a month. Okay. And after that, and how many guys do you have working pay you? I pay myself a salary of roughly $5,000 a month. Okay. And how many guys do you have working for you? Two to three.

Okay. That's cool. I have two full-time and one part-time guy. Okay. Well, it's a substantial business, as you said. You've done a great job. It's worth somewhere around four times that net maybe five times that net something like that and so you know it's worth uh 350 400 000 bucks roughly okay um is uh at 80 000 profit you

know four times that and that gives the buyer a uh a 20 or 25 percent return 5x would be a 20 return 4x would be a 25 return return on their money. So where I, an investor, I could buy this, hire a $60,000 a year manager to run it and, and, um, you know, give you 350,000 bucks and I'd make 20, 25% on my money. Gotcha. And then, so one of my guys, one of my main employees, he's been, this is his third year. He is, I've briefly told him like what the plan is and he's shown interest in wanting to buy it. But I know, I mean, he's a young, he's a younger kid. He's like 22, 23.

So I know he doesn't have the cash to buy it um would you advise doing like an owner finance deal or what if if that's what he came about or try to just find a buyer that can just buy it outright um well what what you would do if you did this um it'd be nice to have a buyer buy it outright i'd take less if i could get my cash and go yeah because otherwise you have the risk of not getting your money if if this this young man runs it into the dirt right no pun intended yeah no for sure so uh what christy and i always advise people when they're doing this is if you're buying the business you can do a an owner finance deal but it's just a percentage of profits and so what i would do is say uh let the young man make $60,000 a year and you get all the profits until it gets to 400K.

Gotcha. Until they, so, you know, four or five years worth of the profits are going to come to you. The problem is if he mishandles it during that period of time and you have to repossess the business, it's not going to be worth as much because he will have messed up your cash flow yeah and that's that's the one thing that i've thought of and that's why i'm like so if he came to me like um and say like here's 200 i can do 250 and then say he got like a loan for it or something i mean i would take it yeah okay here's the other thing you consider um uh chase is this young man that's considering buying it he may be great at lawn care Yeah. Okay. just the day-to-day lawn care. There's a lot more that you do, and you know what that is, that he may not be aware of. So vet him or mentor him or whatever that looks like. Just because he's right there doesn't mean he's the right person,

even if he can figure out the financing. You know, I kind of doubt he's going to land a bank for $250,000 at 23 years old, 24 years old, which he'll be at that point. That'd be shocking, unless there's something in the equation I'm not hearing. What wouldn't be shocking is if his grandpa decided he wanted to set him up in business. Yeah. Well, that all sounds good to me, and I appreciate the advice. Yeah, I think that's everything I need to know there.

Yeah, it's good stuff. And, you know, just the thing is, the other thing I like to do if I'm going to carry the paper on something, which I almost never do, is I want to get such a large down payment that after I have to repossess it, I'm happy I got it back because I get to do it again. In other words, if you had a $350,000 price tag and you got $200,000 down and you had to take it back two years later, oh, well, we'll do this again. Right.

You know, and so that's what a guy I used to buy notes with. He called it happy, happy. You're happy if they pay, you're happy if they don't, because you get enough down payment and you get a good enough price and a good enough terms that you're happy if they pay. And if they don't pay, you're okay. They're so deep into you that you're, you're going to make money on the transaction on the repossession. And that's harsh, but that's the reality. And it keeps everybody in their lane and keeps everybody moving the right way. When they've got almost no down payment in it, and you're going to be in another town,

and he runs your equipment and your customers into the dirt, no pun intended, then you're going to be in a mess. Yeah, he doesn't have any skin in the game. You built it, Chase. He's the one that built it over the last 14 years. Yeah, even if he didn't want to, even if he didn't do it with malice. Right, right, right. And you get screwed over a lot more by enthusiastic ignoramuses than you do people with malice.

So, yeah, I can just see somebody not maintaining the equipment, you know, that kind of stuff, and you're getting a real hurt. Our Entree Leadership Summit has a wait list for 2021. If you'd like to come, you can get on the wait list. In other words, we've sold it out. Marcus Buckingham will be there, Pat Lencioni, Craig Groeschel, Simon Sinek, Jim Collins, Christy Wright, Chris Hogan, Dr. John Deloney and Ken Coleman, and me will be the speakers.

This is a world-class experience. Our Ontario Leadership Summit, we just finished it last week here in Nashville, and it's coming up next year in May, in June, or in May, rather, of 2021. And it is waitlisted already. It's sold out, and we're setting everything up. If you'd like to be on the waitlist and let us keep you abreast of what's going on with it, dates and locations and all that kind of stuff, there's a lot in change right now going on. So the text of the word SUMMIT to 44222, that's the word SUMMIT to 44222. 24 to 22.

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Plus, they offer an exclusive for Ramsey Show listeners. listeners right now you can grab most polarized pairs for just 28 at shady rays.com with the promo code dave to get 20 off your first pair of shady rays Our question of the day comes from blinds.com. They have a 100% satisfaction guarantee. Now, when you hear that most of the time, you go, well, if I don't like it, I can take it back or whatever. I'm not satisfied with the quality. Now, this means when you order window blinds from these guys, if you screw up and you measure it wrong or you get the wrong color,

they still will replace your blinds for free. This is a guarantee I could use because it's like an idiot-proof guarantee, right? If you screw it up, they're still going to give you stuff free and fix it for you use the promo code ramsey you always get the best deal and they got free samples and free shipping and always got new promos our question christy yes this comes from melissa in kentucky here's what she said i began selling watercolor portraits about two weeks ago and i've gotten a ton of positive feedback and interest i should be so. But the last three paintings I've done, each one took more and more tries because I wasn't confident in the drawings. I painted and repainted one of them four times before I settled

on one to send to the customer. I feel a strong sense of guilt selling anything that I see as less than. How do you deal with perfectionist tendencies? Help, please. You know, this is interesting because I think when you're dealing with any type of art, it never arrives. I've even seen, you know, in our building, the graphic designers, it's like, well, I can make it a little bit more perfect. When you're dealing with something that is art, that is subjective, it's so tempting to make it a little bit better and it never gets there. So I would just say, Melissa, one of the things that will help you is to simply practice sending the first one you paint. So send it once that customer's going to be happy. You're going to do a good job the first time. Send it to them. They're happy. That's

going to give you confidence. Hey, I did it once. I can do it again. But a lot of this, I think, is just overcoming that limiting belief in your head that it could be a little bit more perfect when the customer is probably going to be happy with round one or two or three. And it's going to save you a lot of time if you get in the habit of sending the first round. That's a good suggestion. Because the tension, anytime we're producing a product, any of us, is you want to put out a good enough product that you're proud of it, A, and B, that it creates more business.

Right. Because someone sees that and goes i want one you know you want the book to be well enough written that it helps somebody change their life and they go you got to get this book right um and the tension between that and paralysis of the analysis or perfectionism right because you never do anything you just say ready aim aim aim aim aim aim aim and you never pull the trigger yeah you never put it out there uh i was telling the entree leadership summit last week we've i've sold 20 plus million books and i've never sold a book that didn't have a typo ever i didn't intentionally put typos in them right and none of them were so full of typos

and grammatical errors that they were distracting except the first one. And after that, we could afford an actual editor. But I've never sold a book that went out of here that was completely error-free. Yeah. We would still be sitting here waiting on that. Right. And people would not have been helped. You know, I run into the same thing as a writer.

You're a writer as well. So I'm working working on a project and i edited another draft of it today and i found new things i wanted to change about it new things that can make it better the more times you send it to me i'm still going to find more things that can make it better but at some point you've got to say this is good this is going to help people let's ship it when i finally started when i got with like a real publisher the first time, and I had a real editor the first time I wrote in that situation, I was having that same experience. Every time I'd read through it, I'd start again. Yeah, you'd find new stuff. And I'd go, well, I could do that, and I could do that, and I could do that, and I could do that.

And I was getting really frustrated, and she was brilliant. She said, you know, we have a saying in publishing, the book is never done, you just finally stop and print it. Yeah, that's good. You stop and print it. You never finish it. That's right. You finally just just finally stop and print it yeah that's good you stop and print it you never finish it that's right you finally just have to stop and print it that's good and so there's somewhere between that and putting out crap right and you don't want to put out crap because you're it's embarrassing and you you won't get new business off of it and the people feel ripped off right so if that's your first one you don't want to ship the first one but short of that i completely agree I completely agree with your thing here.

And most artists wouldn't be on that side. Right. Most artists would be on the perfectionist side. Well, and she's getting interest. She's getting all kinds of positive feedback and interest. Yeah, but she hasn't sent out junk yet. I'd be willing. But I wonder if the first one is junk.

I wonder if there's a big difference between. I think you're reading between the lines correctly. I agree with you. You know what I mean? I think her first one is really dead gum good. Yeah. I agree. I think you're seeing the way this is worded.

And, you know, you're looking into this situation. You've done a bunch of coaching over the years, so you can see it. And I agree with you. So as long as you're over there in the top 20, 30 percent of quality and you're not down in the bottom 10 percent of quality you know that's what we're saying yeah then ship it yep uh seth godin says that all the time ship it do it put it out there don't wait around if you wait on perfection nothing ever happens open phones at 888-825-5225 christy wr Wright is my co-host today. Ramsey personality. Rachel is with us in Des Moines.

Well, sort of. Okay. Rachel is with us in Des Moines. Hi, Rachel. Welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show. Hi. Thanks for having me. Sure.

What's up? A question for Christy about a little bit of a life question. So how would you recommend dealing with parents and in-laws who have maybe a little too much opinion on issues about kids and from everything to vaccines to when to send them to school, how do you deal with that? Okay, well, let's just, let's unpack this. Let's get a little bit more information, Rachel. What, what's the, how long have you been married?

Is it your parents or the in-laws or both? Are you, I feel like you're, you're tiptoeing around this here. What's really going on? So, I've been married for five years, have two kids, kind of like yourself. I've got a three-year-old and a one-year-old and it comes from both sides a little bit. My parents, but then also the in-laws as well. And it just seems like every time we try to make a decision or do something, there's a lot of feedback of, you know, their opinions coming in. And I don't want to necessarily overlook that advice but if it's

something we've decided is best for our family how do you get that to come across correctly to them yeah so I hear in your voice Rachel I'm just going to go out on a limb here you sound very sweet and the fact that you're even asking this question you don't want to disrespect anyone you want to be kind and consider them and they are absolutely entitled to an opinion, but it's your kids. And so I think the most important thing to focus on, spend time on, et cetera,

is being on the same page with your spouse. Matt and I spend a lot of time getting on the same page about our kids, our parenting, our money, our plans, whatever that is. And then we are a united front. And our confidence comes from knowing that he and I are a team. We're on the same page. It's really kind of us against the world.

And it's not to make it sound combative. But then when you get passive aggressive comments from anybody, whether it's your parents or your in-laws, you've got this sense of strength of, hey, you know, I hear you, but this is what we're going to do. And one tip I would give you, Rachel, and this might ruffle some feathers of people out there, but do not come from a position of being sorry. Don't say, oh, well, I'm so sorry, mommy, and I know you, and wring your hands. You have nothing to be sorry for.

You are their mother. These are your children. With the best information you have available, unless you're in some way putting them at risk or in harm, you're probably, we're talking about a matter of opinions here. Then you don't come from the position of being sorry, because when you act sorry for something, you don't have to be sorry for you're teaching people that you do. You're teaching people, you have something to be sorry for, and they will respond accordingly. So instead you put your shoulders back, you hold your head. Well, this is what we've decided to do. We've decided to send our hair. Thanks so much, but this is what we're doing.

This is what we've decided is right for our children. Yeah, it's not an, if you are asking for advice, that is one conversation. Yeah. Otherwise, you're making an announcement. Yes, that's a good, I like that. I'm going to take that, Dave. I like that. So, like, one of my daughters won't tell her mother what the name they have chosen for the baby is

because she doesn't want the judgment. And when the baby comes out, she just says, welcome, this is so-and-so. And she gives us the name. We don't know the name ahead of time because Mimi will roll her eyes, and that one can't stand it. And that's cool. This is how it is. That's just a boundary. This is how it is.

It's very difficult for the parents like me, like Papa Dave. You can bet I got an opinion, but I don't get a vote anymore. I raised you, so hopefully that's going to help you with this process. But I don't get a vote anymore, and it's frustrating. I'd like to have my vote back. Nope. But I don't get it. It's called boundaries.

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It's Christians helping other Christians, and it shared nearly $97,000 to help the Olcheskis. To be a part of Christian Healthcare Ministries, visit chministries.org. That's chministries.org. CHM is a proud sponsor of Dave Ramsey Solutions, David and Crystal are with us. Christy Wright's my co-host this hour here on the Dave Ramsey Show. They are on the debt-free stage. Welcome, guys. Good to have you all.

Thank you. Good to be here. Good to have you. Where do you all live? In Chattanooga, Tennessee. Oh, just over the hill. Good. Good to have you, man.

And all the way to Nashville to do a debt-free screen. Yes. Yes, sir. Cool. How much have you paid off? $85,494.10. There you go. Wow.

To be exact. And how long did this take? Two years and 10 months. Wow. Good for you. And your range of income during that time? $85,000 to $95,000 with a whole lot of side hustles involved. There you go.

Okay. So what kind of debt was the $85,000 that you paid off? It was a credit card, a car loan, and a student loan that we named Big Bertha. That'll get you mad at it. Whose student loan was Big Bertha? It was mine. All right, Crystal, what's your degree in? I'm a teacher.

Oh, cool. Is that what you do now? Yes, I teach ESL. Awesome. And what do you do, David? I'm a tax auditor. Very cool. Good, good.

And so life is going along, and you have the normal amount of student loans up to your eyeballs, and the normal other stuff. What happened two years and 10 months ago? What was the wake-up call? What lit you on fire? Well, about three years ago, we would sit down and we would do monthly budget talks. I get paid once a month as a teacher, and we just never seemed to have enough money to get out of debt, to pay off the credit card bill, just to move forward, and we wanted to, it would always wind up with me crying because I was so upset because we just couldn't hit the goals that we wanted to.

We never really fought, but we were just always, you know, we just weren't getting anywhere. And January of 2017, our church was offering financial peace. And so we pulled out our credit card and paid for it because that was the only way we had the money at the time. Which means your church takes credit cards, not Dave Ramsey. Let's be clear. That is correct. And then we started February of 2017. It was just before our 10-year anniversary. We had a trip to Disney World planned just for the two of us to celebrate. We went to the class the first night and we decided we needed to cancel that trip. And so we took a couple hundred dollars and we ended up going to the Biltmore for a weekend

to celebrate our anniversary, and it was just game on from then. All right. Very cool. So the class did it? Yeah. All right. Yes, sir. Cool.

The first night, I mean, you got fired up. Yeah. It was the plan that we needed that we wanted. We wanted to have control over money. We wanted to do better than we were doing. We wanted to get rid of all of it. We just didn't know how to, and we just kept spinning our wheels. And once we finally had the plan that worked for us, it just all made sense, and it was so doable.

So something about the first night not only showed you the plan but made you believe it would work. Yeah. Because that's important. That's important information. You know, anytime anyone wants to change anything, you have to see a way to do it, and you have to believe that you can do that. It's probably also, I would imagine, Crystal,

is validating for the discouragement you've been feeling, because I remember when I was paying off my debt, I did the math of how long it would take me to pay off my credit card if I did the minimum payment, and I would have died before it was paid off doing the minimum payment. I mean, it wasn't ever going to happen, and so you're so discouraged, but you're sitting there going, oh, well, this explains our situation. We have to do something different.

What we've been doing isn't working. Yeah. When I started, my loan was financed almost 30 years. So both of my kids would have been through college before we ever could have touched mine. Yeah. So not giving us any money to put aside for them to get them through. Yeah. Helps you see it.

So, David, what did you see in the class the first night? The same thing? Pretty much so. My parents are financial advisors, so I grew up with the knowledge, but I'm the spreadsheet guy. I had it all down on the spreadsheet. She needed notebook. I didn't like notebook, and in pretty much that's the way our budget meetings were beforehand was I have it on spreadsheet and I have it on an accounting software. She wants it handwritten down and it just kind of clashed. And then that first night it was off to the races and I was holding on by the coattails waiting to catch up. She went from crying to running wide open. Yes. When you talk about the kids being fearful that they're next to be sold,

like people in my church were like, you're selling everything in your house. Like, how are you doing this? And, you know, what's left? But we actually, we had some amazing friends who were in the process of moving, and they were going to donate just some stuff they were getting rid of to, like, the Goodwill. And she was like, would you like it for, like, one of your yard sales? Cause she knew we were on board. And I was like, yes, absolutely. And so she gave me a bunch of stuff and we had a huge yard sale. And later that fall there was a consignment sale for kids clothes. And so I put in all of my kids clothes and I was like, Hey,

does anyone have some clothes they want to sell? I'll split the profit with you. And so we sold the consignment sale. I babysat. We walked dogs. We cat sat. David got an extra job. Notice that you walk dogs and you sit on cats. David got an extra job. He actually taught a Quick Book class at one of the community colleges in the area. Got those spreadsheet skills for something, right?

Yes, sir. All right. We did everything we could. And just, I mean, we hustled all the time. Wow. So how's it feel now that you did it? Amazing. You sacrificed. Yeah.

Was it worth it? Absolutely. Very much so. Will you ever go back? No. No, sir. No hesitation in that answer. We have a picture of our car on a tow truck just before we

were done. We were set to be done in October. I mean, we ended up finishing in December and our car got towed three times because we were having issues with it. The biggest one was from Gatlinburg all the way back to Chattanooga. Yeah, we were at a soccer tournament and the car just quit. But it was in that moment that we realized how important the emergency fund was. And we actually didn't have to use it because we had enough just in our monthly budget that we could cover the cost of that. But we were sitting in the hotel room after I'd gotten off the phone with the tow truck. And I cried a little bit because just the frustration of being so far away. But there was no concern about how are we going to pay for it or like

what the bill was going to be because we knew we had that emergency fund. And so it really became an inconvenience, like you say, instead of like a true emergency. And, you know, we got the car back and we got it fixed and, you know, it's perfect now. So, but that emergency fund is just so key. Oh, it changes a crisis into an inconvenience. And it's just peaceful because like I said, we never even had to use it. But just knowing if we had to. The only thing it did was bump you out a month on your get out of debt.

And that kicked your butt. Yeah, I was a little bitter about that. Yeah, I don't blame you. Good stuff. All right, what do you tell people the key to getting out of debt is? You did it. Work really hard. I can tell.

Be willing to do anything you can. And be intentional about every single thing that you do. I think one of the other pictures shows there's like a gift card and a $20 bill and a box of candy. Like we would do things like that for date nights. Like, you know, what can we do? How can we enjoy the evening with just a small amount? Because we, you know, wanted that time together where it wasn't just talking about our budget and stuff. And so those are always fun days because we would just see what we could get into with the least amount of money. Y'all are such a team.

You just see it. You hear it in your voice. That's awesome. That's really, really cool. Well done, y'all. Working together is a big part of this. Yeah. You really, really did.

I'm so proud of you. Very well done. All right. What was the very best, most profitable for the effort side hustle? Her cakes and cookies. She made hustle. Her cakes and cookies. She made big money on cakes and cookies. That's amazing. For Christmas, he got me a cake decorating class,

and it ended up turning into one of my side hustles where I could start baking cakes and cookies and sell them. That's amazing. Very cool. That's close to Christy's heart. That's right. Her mama has a bakery. Very cool, you guys. Very well done. And you brought to Christy's heart. That's right. That's right. So I'm all good. Mama has a bakery. Yeah. Very cool, you guys.

Very well done. And you brought the kiddos with you. What are their names and ages? All right. So this is Hannah Grace. She's four. And this is Isaac. He's 11.

All right. Very good. Very good. We've got a copy of Chris Hogan's book for you, Everyday Millionaires. That for sure is the next chapter in your story. You're on your way, heroes. Well done. well done thank you took control of your life yes yeah that's like grown-up stuff well done very well done all right david and crystal isaac and hannah 85 000 paid off in two years and 10 months making 85 to 95 count it down let's hear a debt-free scream be the glory three two's hear a debt-free scream. It's got to be the glory.

3, 2, 1. We're debt-free! Yeah! Yeah! That's awesome. Congratulations. That is so fun. Her hustle. Those kids. That's like you watching your mom growing up.

Yes. They were ready to get after it. Side hustle after side hustle. They're like, we're going to do this. That's like you watching your mom growing up. Yes. And she was, I mean, they were ready to get after it. Side hustle after side hustle. They're like, we're going to do this. And that's a big deal. Great place to go when you're broke. Yeah. To work. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. Thank you. well folks when people get to baby step four and they start investing sometimes they're freaking

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Kelly is in Pittsburgh. Hey, Kelly, how are you? I'm doing well. Thank you so much for taking my call sure what's up okay so first i have to tell you it's just a privilege to talk to you sir my husband and i uh several years ago took fpu at our church and it it completely changed our life we paid off about 150 in debt, which was mostly my big giant school loan. And now we've been through baby step four and baby step five. And we're getting ready to start six. And COVID sort of hit.

My job is as secure, I think, as a job really can be in today's time. My husband works in sales though, so he's pretty much taken a big giant hit, but we can live off of my income alone. But sort of where we are now, we have everything ready. We did one little bit of stupid and we still have that hanging out, which is a vehicle lease. It is up in August and I've done, we've done a lot of research on what type of vehicle, and we have the money saved, but we're sort of just really struggling with spending that much on a vehicle. I know we're leasing, and it's completely stupid, but sort of where we are is we have our emergency fund.

Our six-month emergency fund is about $30,000 and we have 60 in the bank and I have, uh, we've picked out, it's a 2014 vehicle. And, um, from the research I did essentially for what, what type of vehicle we need to get our three kids in car seats in the back, it's a Lexus GS or I'm sorry, a GX as far as, uh, maintaining it's as much value as it can because it's a vehicle and just safety and the cost for maintenance and things like that. So that would run at about $25,000. I just feel super guilty about paying that much, and I'm thinking, should we only buy like kind of a clunker for five instead or should we what's your household income bigger chunk not counting covid what's your household income um our household income we're less is uh anywhere from you know 175 to 200 what's the other car worth

uh my the one that's leased no the, the one, the other car. You have two cars, don't you? Okay. Yes. I don't even know what it is. Roughly. $10,000 or $100,000? No, no. $10,000 maybe.

Okay. All right. So you'd have $35,000 in cars if you bought a 25 and this one's worth $10, right? Yes. You have the cash to pay for it and you make 175 000 a year yeah now my husband again and okay i that's i okay i understand we're wasting way more money than that on a lease but we've never bought like a big adult purchase that

cost that much before so yeah you have you just paid for it in the form of a lease that's true that's true well in fact yes what we've paid for a lease essentially over all these years if we would have added that in a total lump sum we could buy this vehicle yeah easy easy easy, easy, yeah. Easy, yeah, yeah, okay. So here's the thing. Here's what happens. You went from being, and Sharon and I experienced the same thing. You went from being irresponsible. You worked your way out of the mess by becoming uber responsible,

hyper responsible, careful and tight. You worked your way out of the mess, and now you have developed a really strong financial position, but your emotions are still back there when you were being gazelle intense. Yeah, that's probably right. After we took SPU, probably after the debt snowball clashed, I mean, we went from real normal to real weird real quick and this feels this feels weirder by the day that you're this is yeah this purchase is beyond your emotions you've experienced it you know it's funny because i was just talking about this on the

christy right so just uh this week with the episode that aired this week we're talking about money and i said something happened to me in my 20s where it used to be the mindset was if i have the money i should buy it there was no reason not to buy something if the money was physically in my account. And then I started to realize, oh, if I live that way, I'm never going to have any money. And so when I started to pay off my debt and become debt free and change my mindset, I started to value having money in my account more than the stuff. Well, once you make that switch, even if you want the thing, it's still hard to write that check. She may want the car, but but man it feels good to have that 25 000 in my account that's hard to let go of when you switch to valuing actually stockpiling some cash and having some cash so that's probably a little

bit of what's going on too exactly what is the the cash is giving you more emotional psychological satisfaction than the car although you have dialed this car completely in i mean the way you described it you have completely bought this car yeah i mean you are you're way down there you're down the lexus rabbit hole no question you sound like a lexus salesman when you're done i don't have to be i know i'm not making fun of. I'm not making fun of you. I'm just making fun of you. I was so worried, like, by which my husband and I have talked. I called yesterday and never got to talk to you. And I said, I don't really know why I need to call.

I know exactly where we've been doing this for years. I know what he's going to say. What did you think? Did I say what you thought I was going to say? Yes. Yes. And I said, I'm worried that there's going to say. Did I say what you thought I was going to say? Yes. And I said, I'm worried that there's not a warranty. And I said, he's going to say, baby girl, your warranty is in the bank in cash.

You don't need a guarantee. It's right there. That's exactly right. By the way, if you buy a certified Lexus on their lot, it'll have a warranty with it, but that's included in the price. Don't buy an extended warranty. You know that as well. You know all the answers to these questions. And, by the way, Sharon, hold our kids around that same car for a few years. It's a good car.

I actually own two of those over my life. I've had two of those. That exact car. They're great cars, and they're powerful. They've got a big V8 in them. They'll go, too. So keep your foot out of it. Yeah, it's still hard to let go of that money.

When we were pregnant with Mary Grace last summer, I had to upgrade my V8. I had a little Lexus RX 350, a little, you know, one row in the back seat. And I wanted to have two rows for all the 15 car seats, it felt like. And we went to find one. We ended up getting a Honda Pilot with the three rows. And they said the same thing. They're like, oh, you know, this warranty, that warranty. I was like, I work for Dave Ramsey.

He's like, I'm not going to waste my breath. I was like, all right, good. Okay, tap out. I'm not in the mood. I don't want to hear it. But, yeah, it's still hard to write that check even if you have it once you value the money. But, yeah, you need that and you'll be glad you have it, Kelly. Yeah.

We've even experienced that in business. That as the numbers here have come up. And this company will bring in 250 million dollars this year and uh i can't wrap my emotional head around that still intellectually i can grasp it yeah but we spend more on copier paper here than i spent on the entire first year probably you know with a thousand employees and so i just can't get my head around what we spent on coffee yeah you know i can't get my head around the stuff and not emotionally now intellectually i can go oh well that you know that makes sense with that many people that you got this and that but your emotions don't catch up

and that's what happens as you go through these different stages of wealth building you go from uh you know deep in debt and oblivious to where then you understand what's going on and you get that gazelle intensity and then you move up and you know your emotions it just takes a little while to catch up yeah yeah that's good you get to run you get to run in so hard and you're so dialed in with it yeah very good we're proud of you she needs it and she'll she'll be glad she has it yeah she did a great job yeah that's really good i mean they paid off a ton of debt yeah we're making big money. She's done her research on the car.

She knows what she wants, knows what she needs. Ready to go. That puts us out of the Dave Ramsey Show in the books. Our thanks to James Childs, our producer, Kelly Daniel, our associate producer and phone screener. I am Dave Ramsey Show. Once again, you made The Dave Ramsey Show one of the top four most popular podcasts last year. To get your daily dose of motivation and inspiration from the Ramsey Network,

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