The Ramsey Show - App - I’m Tired of the Life I’m Living, It’s a Mess (Hour 3)

Episode Date: June 8, 2023

Dave Ramsey & Jade Warshaw answer your questions and discuss:  "Getting my husband on board with the plan", "Should I increase my emergency fund for car repairs?" "My girlfriend's family wants me to pay for my flight for this trip" How the Baby Steps apply to people without kids, Teaching kids to be wise with money.  Have a question for the show? Call 888-825-5225 Weekdays from 2-5pm ET Join a Personality-led FPU class. Click here! Want a plan for your money? Find out where to start: https://bit.ly/3cEP4n6 Listen to all The Ramsey Network podcasts: https://bit.ly/3GxiXm6 Interested in advertising on The Ramsey Show? https://ter.li/s64ye3 Learn more about your ad choices. https://www.megaphone.fm/adchoices Ramsey Solutions Privacy Policy

Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the pods of Moving and Storage Studios, it's the Ramsey Show, where we help people build wealth, do work that they love, and create actual amazing relationships. Jade Walsh, all-Ramsey personality, is my co-host today. Open phones at 888-825-5225. If you are listening to this show and loving this show, help us out. Spread the word for us.

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potential viewers listeners and uh we appreciate that because that a bunch of folks have joined since first of the year our ratings and rankings and all measures are way up and that means you guys are sharing it and that leave a five-star review too thank you very much all right zoo is with us in san francisco hi zoo how are you hey mr baby how are you great how can we help oh that's so great to hear i am calling because i'm so tired of living the life that i'm living and i need your help. So, um, the reason that I'm calling is because I need to know, or we need to know my husband and I need to know how to get my husband on

board with the plan and care about our home finances. Um, we got married back in April of 2020 and my husband said that he had income to bring to the marriage we come to find out he had no money at all to come into the marriage not even for the honeymoon so he wasn't working our marriage um or no savings but no savings. Okay. Nothing in savings. So he made a mistake or he lied to you? He straight up lied completely. Wow. To the tune of how much?

He said, oh, I have enough money for like six months of expenses. He was moving from Michigan to California at that time. And it was a flat out lie. It flat out completely. Yes. What else has he lied about? Spending. Um, he has borrowed so much money from family members and so we have our finances together now, but it's just not, it doesn't seem to be working.

Well, cause you don't trust him. I trust him, yes. I mean, why do I trust him? Because he's my husband. No, you don't trust him. I had a dog one time that would bite you, and he's my dog, but he would bite you. I didn't trust him, even though he's my dog. This dog bites.

Oh, my gosh. So what are you all doing to build your relationship after it started on lies? So we go to church, and we've been getting counseling at church, and every time we meet, like we meet quarterly, and he's like, yeah, I'm going to change. But he has not changed one bit. It's only getting worse. And we've been trying to start your plan since the beginning of the year. You don't need to start our plan.

Hey, what's he spending money on? You said that he's spending money. He's not telling you about it. What's he spending that money on? He's spending money on GoPros, electronics, cameras, cables. How old is she? He's 27. Okay.

So she married a child. Yeah. A boy child. That's what kids do. They do things they know they're not supposed to do. And then when mommy says, what'd you do? They lie about it. And then mommy says, okay, you're in timeout.

And they say say okay i thought about what i did and then they go back and do the same thing again that's exactly we got it to the point that's exactly what's going on i'm sorry that's frustrating i can't get him on our plan our plan is for grown-ups so he's So you guys have to continue and engage in in-depth counseling for your marriage. You guys, you're in a mess, honey. I'm so sorry.

I'm so sorry. Because this guy does not want to engage anything that requires self-discipline, self-control, maturity, the ability to delay pleasure for a greater good. He is about him.

He's not about you. He's not about your marriage. He's not about your future. He's about him. I can't help someone in that situation. I'd love to, but the best way I can help him is to be mean enough to him that he goes and does something good for himself and starts to grow up. Because, you know, a man, not a 27-year-old male, but a man does not put his personal desires and purchases in a lie

ahead of the good of the family and the good of his wife. And that's what you're facing. You're so right. Yeah. I'm so sorry. Me too. I'm so sorry for you. Yeah.

I wish I could, I mean, if I thought I could take you guys, if you guys were both ready to go, but the work you all need to, the time you need to be spending is not on Financial Peace University. You need to be spending time in the marriage counselor's office. And, you know, and if he won't go, your marriage counselor needs to help you decide in your church setting at what point is this marriage done. Because I can promise you it's done if he doesn't change. I don't know whether it's a decade or whether it's 10 days or 10 months but it's uh but but i've worked doing what i'm doing and i and i know that i don't believe in divorce i don't i'm not telling you

to get a divorce i'm not doing any of that but i've worked with couples long enough to know the lady in your situation will hold her breath for some period of time and when the when the volcano finally goes off there's no putting the lava back in i know that's right it's over the switch is flipped and we be done and no amount of spiritual shaming or anything else will undo that i know that's right so uh please please please the two of you for the good of your future for the good of each other spend time on getting in a good solid winning relationship where you're serving each other not being self-ish being selfless and that's you know the an immature and all of these things. So, it's so hard, so hard. Wow.

I'm so sorry. So guys, I'm disclosing a hundred percent in truth of who you are about money and exactly what the dollars and cents are, how much is in savings, how much is in retirement, how much you make, um,

really early in the dating process is a valid thing. I think so. Jesus said your treasure is where your heart is. So how you handle money and where the money goes speaks about who you are as a person. It's a description of your value. It is. And your values, rather. And so young ladies demand that of these young males

to see if they're men. Young men demand that of these young females to see if they're grown women instead of little princesses. You don't want this, guys. It's not fun. It's not fun. Oh, it's so sad.

This is The Ramsey Show. Hey's not fun. Oh, it's so sad. This is The Ramsey Show. Hey, you guys. Health insurance costs are only moving one way, and that way isn't down. And if higher costs aren't enough, the wait times to see your doctor are longer, and it's harder than ever to get anything approved through the bureaucracy. So if you feel like the system is working against you, try a biblically-based alternative to health insurance, Christian Healthcare Ministries. CHM is a health cost-sharing ministry that's helped hundreds of thousands of families like yours take care of over $11 billion in medical bills since 1981. And CHM has also helped them stay true to their values and avoid miles of red tape. And CHM support goes far beyond meeting financial needs.

They'll also help meet spiritual needs. Members become part of a family who will pray with them and for them when they experience a medical event. So listen, y'all, there's no better way to take care of health care costs. CHM programs start as low as $98 a month. So learn more today and join at chministries.org slash budget. That's chministries.org slash budget. Thank you for joining us, America. Jade Warshaw, Ramsey Personality, is my co-host today. We appreciate you hanging out with us. Paying off debt is smart. Saving and investing is smart.

But there's another key to winning with money, and that is the defense side. That's called protecting your finances. That's called insurance. There are ten kinds of insurance coverage you might need, and no more. That's all. You don't need all this gimmick stuff and all these i need i need insurance for my chihuahuas toenails oh my god you people it's unbelievable what you get insurance on no there's 10 kinds of basic insurance you need you need to self-insure with your emergency fund through everything else we're going to help you do that with a coverage checkup to show you which types

you need to add drop or adjust we'll even rank your coverage list by importance email it to you and connect you with a ramsey trusted insurance provider that will shop a bazillion different companies and get you the best price on each type that you do need go to ramsey solutions.com slash checkup ramsey solutions.com slash checkup be ramseysolutions.com slash checkup. Becky is in Charlotte, North Carolina. Hi, Becky. Welcome to the Ramsey Show. Hi, Dave.

Hi, Jade. Thank you both so much for taking my call this afternoon. Sure. What's up? So I am working on the baby steps. I have completed baby step one, and I'm working off all of my debt. But I had a question. I feel like my car is quite possibly on its last leg. So I am wondering if I should increase my

emergency fund to help to potentially cover any major repairs or possibly needing to buy kind of another reliable A to B outright without a new note. I would start putting money aside like a sinking fund if I knew that a car repair was up and coming. So why do you think that? So a whole slew of reasons. It's a 2009 Camry, which obviously Camrys are very reliable, but we are inching close to 250,000 miles. I know for a fact based on, um, previous repair experiences that I've had that there's an oil valve gasket leak. Um, the idle is starting to get really, really rough. The exhaust doesn't sound good. Um, so I mean a whole slew of things that are indicating that it may potentially go

and maybe within the next six months to a year. And I want to make sure that I'm prepared to take care of anything I need to take care of while also not neglecting the fact that I'm trying to work off debt. What's your household income? Personally, I make about... I didn't ask personally. I said, are you the only income? I have a roommate.

Okay. That's not a household. I mean, if you're not married, it's you. Okay. So you have an income of what? $57,500 with potential for bonuses. And your debt is what? I've got about $50,000 left.

On what? $40,000 is student loans, and $10 and 10 is a personal loan that I have mapped out that if I pay as much as I possibly can, I could get rid of it by December. Good. Very good. Yeah, you're doing a good job. Thank you. You're driving a $2,000, $1,000 car. Yeah.

Yeah. And you got a $ thousand dollar emergency fund um there's 1500 in it now because i did kind of start building a thinking fund but i wanted to make sure that that was the right direction to take this okay i know i do not violate the baby steps okay what i do what we do from time to time is say look at a situation and say, there's an emergency. If there's an emergency, you have to stop everything and cover the emergency. All right. Now, obviously you don't make enough money to buy a car on one month's income. If you, uh, did this. So no, I'm not going to do a sinking fund for a car i disagree with jade while i'm

working on the baby steps uh if we're gonna declare the car dying gasping it has a death rattle which is what you're declaring it then we might say we're gonna stop everything so you're going storm mode and say yeah and say okay for two we're going to pile up and let's go get, let's sell this $1,500 car, put $2,000 with it, and get a three times better car for twice the money, right? Okay. And then restart. Because I think you could get $2,000 together in about a month, couldn't you? Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, and if you took the $2,000 plus your car, you get a $3,500 car, give or take.

And that would be a lot better car than the one you got, probably. Yeah, I would definitely do my research and make sure anything that I was buying outright was. Yeah, I can tell you actually have a clue about this, which is very good. That puts you ahead of the curve. So, yeah, i might do that and then when i say that i'm making you stop your dead snowball for a minute you kind of went gulp because you're on it and stopping that dead snowball doesn't sound fun and that makes you analyze how serious you are about whether you think this car is really going to break or not.

Yeah, absolutely. I'm very much a plan A, B, C, D, Z person. Yeah, you're running a flow chart. I heard it. Yeah, if this, then that. Yeah, and that's good. It's a good decision-making paradigm that you're using. Your decision-making skills are excellent. So I'm okay with a full stop and upgrading car.

I'm okay driving the car for 60 more days, and let's see how we're doing, staying dead on the debt snowball, no additional savings. And if it's scaring you even more, full stop, because I think if you'll give yourself 30 days worth of notice before a car dies, you can have your other car. We obviously don't want it to die in the middle of it. And then the other question that comes to mind is, does it just simply need a tune-up? Yeah, that's also on my radar um of the things that have been evaluated thus far i would probably be looking at between five and six hundred dollars that's a budget item a car repair

is a budget item exactly so that would you know i might tune it up now i'm not going to spend three thousand dollars on a fifteen hundred dollar. But if I can spend $200 or $300 and get rid of the coughing and the sputtering, whether it's cleaning the fuel injectors or whatever they're doing, and get the thing running right again, and that buys me enough time to finish off the student loan debt, boy, that would have been a good move, right? But if I do that and I find out, hey, I really got to get rid of this thing, it's going to die, then we push full stop and go get out. Let's go get your car and then push full go.

I don't really want to play both sides at the same time. You follow me? Yeah, not at the same time. I've got to be able to come up with a plan of attack based on either stop and get the car or wait a little bit and then stop and get the car and in the meantime tune it up and see if it works that's probably my plan i'm probably going to take a run at the tune-up and then revisit this decision 90 days from now and if that is a plan i can work with yeah if i'm still really scared then i'm gonna push full stop go get a car and then push full start and get out of debt because you're not going and buying a $25,000 car. I mean, you're being everything you're giving us is very wise.

Your level of common sense is excellent. You really are on it, girl. I'm proud of you. Thank you so much. So I think she's winning, don't you? Look, she's living with roommates. She's doing what she got to do to get out of this debt. Yeah, driving a junkie butt car.

I mean, Megan. $2,000 car, yes. Yeah, I mean, it's like she said, Camrys are good cars, but they die too. Yeah, that's true. $250,000 is a... Okay, so cars are this. Like she mentioned A to B. Somebody has taught her so well.

Yeah, she's smart. That was not our phrase yet, but that's exactly... A car is an A to B. Somebody has taught her so well. Yeah, she's smart. That was not our phrase yet, but that's exactly. A car is an A to B thing. Everything above the transportation that gets you from A to B is a luxury. Luxuries are not evil. I drive a really nice, expensive car. It's a luxury, though. It's ridiculous.

But the actual transportation function is A to B, and every one of us can do that for five grand. Yeah. Very reliable. And air conditioner works. Yeah. And get from A to B. Everything above that is luxury.

And that's okay. But I need a new car when you're driving a $15,000 car is not a factual statement. I want a nicer car. It's an okay statement and it's factual. But don't talk yourself into needs when they're not needs. Call them what they are. They're wants. Her case what they are, their wants. Her case, we're dealing with need.

This is The Ramsey Show. Jade Warshaw, Ramsey personality, is my co-host today. Thank you for joining us, America. Nate is with us in Pennsylvania. Hi, Nate. Welcome to The Ramsey Show. Hey, Dave. How's it going? Better than I deserve. What's up? Hey, I have a question for you. Kind of feels like a little bit of a dilemma that I've been feeling uneasy about. Let me start off. I'm in baby step number one, just working to save $1,000 right now. I have $32,000 in debt.

I have a $15,000 car loan that I'm actually trying to sell this week. It's worth 19 private value. So hopefully that will work out for me there. My other dilemma here is that I had agreed to this vacation with my girlfriend that her parents got for us to go to Key West. And she's like, all you got to do is pay $600. My mom got us the tickets already. And I'm just chilling really uneasy about that, being that I'm on beans and rice right now.

And I don't want to do anything like that. I also don't want to disappoint anybody or hurt anyone. Wait a minute. I'm sorry. Tell me the trip again. walk me through that again to go to her parents they want you guys a trip but not fully yes wait a minute so exactly so they they announced to you that they're giving you the gift of a trip but you have to pay for it correct for the flight oh for the flight but when they announced that they were giving you the trip did they announce that you were

going to pay for the flight yes this was something that i was aware of but now moving forward and being that i've just started the baby steps i'm like this is something i'm not comfortable with doing now and i feel like i'm kind of locked into it have the tickets been purchased what do i do have the tickets been purchased yes they purchased them and they're asking you to reimburse them yes and they purchased them after you agreed to this yes i did agree to it and then they went and bought the tickets Yes. And they purchased them after you agreed to this? Yes, I did agree to it. And then they went and bought the tickets?

Yes, and now I'm feeling uneasy about it. Tuffy, Tuffy, you bought a ticket. Stupid tax. I'm sorry, say that again? I said that's tough. You told them to go buy you a ticket, and they went and bought you a ticket. You owe for the ticket. You're going.

Yep. Yeah. Sorry if you regret it, but yeah, you promise these people you're going to pay them let me tell you what yeah you're dating my daughter and you tell me you're going to do something and then you don't do it that's a problem i don't want to mess with that problem dave yeah you i mean you gave your word now if they sprung this on you and then then expected you to pay for the ticket well that's them violating a boundary but they made a proposal they said hey we'll go on a trip we'll pay for everything but the airline you pick up your own airline and you said i'm in yeah but now you have you have buyer's remorse is really what it trickles down to yeah that's kind of where i'm

at i guess yeah i'm sorry nate you bought an airline ticket you need to pay for it you need to go on the trip and smile can i ask you one more quick question are you going to do that yeah you can't you can't be a butthead on the trip because you have to pay are you going to go on the trip and pay them for the ticket no i'm gonna have to yeah yeah okay good all right and be nice because this is what you signed up for the trip you signed up for they did not do something to you you did something to you yeah that's true okay all right now go ahead i'm sorry your second question is what just real quick now being that i'm in baby step number one and get ready to sell my car, I have $32,000 in debt, and I'm looking to get that down to, I owe $15,000 on it, so I'm looking to get that down to about $17,000 roughly.

I'm bringing in $45,000 a year. What is going to be my timeline for getting out of debt? How many hours a week are you working now? 40 a week. Okay. Well, you're going to double that. Double up on that, huh? Yeah.

Get your income up another 30, and you'll be out of debt in a year. The faster, the more income, the more you have throwing out this debt, the faster it's going to eliminate. Yeah. You're selling your car for this goal. Now, go give some of your hours. Give some blood for this goal right now some blood sweat and tears and in regards to getting an a to b car can i go ahead and get that or yeah pay cash for it yeah when you sell this other car you said you're gonna have transportation right

i should have three or four thousand dollars i do drive a company vehicle oh you don't need it you have to have an can you use the company vehicle to go to the grocery store legally yes so why do you have to have another car i guess it's not completely necessary not today no it's it's i mean you you have transportation you're allowed the company allows you to drive to church in the company car or to go to the grocery store in the company car personal use reasonable personal use yep then then drive the company car and later on when you get out of debt if you want to pile up the money and get you a five thousand ten thousand dollar car to sit in the driveway that's fine but this car sits in the driveway this is a very expensive luxury sure is yeah i'm already throwing it away yeah yeah i i'm

hey all right listen let me tell you the way my mind works in this okay i don't want to work 80 hour weeks any longer than i have to so if i'm you i'm trading that three or four thousand dollars to shorten the number of weeks i have to work my tail end off to get the debt paid off okay that's what i'm doing that's how my mind went when we said do we buy another car or do number of weeks I have to work my tail end off to get the debt paid off. Okay. That's what I'm doing. That's how my mind went when we said, do we buy another car or do we throw this three or four at it? So, uh, Hey, I, I sense that you're in a really key moment in your life that a whole

bunch of things are changing for you at once in a good way. There's a lot of growing up going on. There's a lot of stepping into responsibility going on you're asking ethical questions lots of good things happening with you right now I want you to continue to lean into all of this and don't pull back from it because you may feel the fire a little bit on some of this time this time of transformation for you you may feel some heat at some point lean into the heat don't back up from it because i think god's got some really cool things for you coming nate i love that don't you

i believe it there's a whole bunch of different points in that story yeah you can tell that his priorities his priorities are shifting he's starting to put a lot more thought into the decisions that he's making i think he's about to buy her a ring hey hey just make sure she's on board with the plan i'm but i'm thinking i think i think and i think that made him get real serious about ethics not only with her parents but everybody get real serious about getting this mess cleaned up i'm putting the house on the market i'm i'm i'm so serious i'm gonna call dave and jade and let them beat me up if i have to let's go get it done you know yeah and that was, he's in a cool place. I

like this guy. Good for him. Don't you? I do. I do. Our question of the day comes from Neighborly, your hub for home services. Don't wait until the AC or something else goes out. Neighborly helps you find local providers like Air Service, Mr. Appliance, and Dryer Vent Wizard. Go to neighborly.com today. All right. Today's from katie in atlanta what changes do you think you'd make to the baby steps for those without kids i have no heirs to leave anything to and no reason to save for college i need enough pay for senior care since i won't have children to help me but if i die with millions in the bank it seems like a fail it's a really good question and a unique question when i think about the baby mean, obviously, if you don't have kids, you can

just simply omit baby step five. I mean, that's easy. I do think that everybody needs a will because you should determine what happens with your things and with your stuff. You don't want the government to decide that, you know, state or local officials to decide that. And then I'm looking at. A pile of wealth at the end of your life is not a waste.

It's not a waste. It gave you insurance that you had a quality exit. Yeah. That you had a quality people around you. And there's something you're completely leaving out, Katie, and that's the joy of generosity. I was just going to say, I was just getting to that. You don't have to, the whole point of gathering is to be able to give.

It's the live and give like no one else. It's not just the live, it's not just the living part. Yep. So give like no one else. And this next part of the question I feel like answers itself. I need enough to pay for senior care since i won't have children well we do recommend getting long-term care at the right point but she might not even need it you got five million dollars yeah she may not just start writing

checks to nursing homes and then and and you know you say the last chapter of my life i'm going to spend going around finding somebody that's hungry and feeding them i'm going to spend some time making sure a kid has some shoes i'm going to spend some time making sure a kid has some shoes. I'm going to spend some. And you can go through some serious. That'd be the best years of your life. Well, and she might end up with a dude. She might end up with a husband.

We don't know. Might change the whole thing. You know. We don't know Katie's story. Yeah, we don't know how old she is. But yeah, just walk the baby steps as they are. Omit what you don't need. There you go.

You do need a will. There you go. This is The Ramsey Show. Our scripture of the day, 1 Corinthians 15, 58. Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.

Ken Blanchard said there's a difference between interest and commitment. When you're interested in doing something, you do it only when it's convenient. When you're committed to do something, you accept no excuses, only results. Yeah, just step up there, big i like it shanna is with us in fort worth texas hi shanna how are you hi dave and jade my question is uh how to help my kids with their finances they're pretty good about listening to us but i need your advice on helping to advise them on how to be wise with their money and maybe the best place to put it. How old are they? I have my daughter is a junior, going to be a junior in

high school. And my son is going to be a junior in college. And, um, my daughter paid for half of her car and we paid the other half. So it's, and then she has twenty thousand dollars in her checking account okay both of them are dependent both of them are dependent on you um pretty much my um pretty much the junior in college is too yeah you're paying for it yes yeah that's called dependent yeah um he also has a paid for vehicle and twenty seven thousand in his checking. But he also has two hundred fifty thousand in a custodial account that he didn't use for college because he has a full ride academic scholarship. Wonderful. Wonderful. And my daughter will have that, too. But she'll go ahead and tell you that she's not,

she's probably not going to get a full academic scholarship, so she's just trying to go ahead and think ahead what to do too. Yes. Okay. All right. So she's got a $250,000 custodial account as well? Correct. Okay.

All right. Good. Very good, Mom and Dad. Well done. All right. Thank you. Well, there's two sets of things going on. Number one, anything that you do while you're on my payroll, I get to decide if I have to. to i'm going to start with persuasion and teaching wisdom and hopefully just talk you into doing the

right thing uh but you're not going to do stupid while i fund the other parts of your life because i am not confused about who the parent is okay so as long as you're as long as I'm supporting you, I hold the ultimate control, the trump card. I don't want to use it with kids that old. I want to lead them with persuasion and facts into good decisions. So that's with current decisions. For instance, these kids sound like they're very level-headed. It sounds like you guys have done a great job with them but i'll just give you a weird one let's say your uh son who's in college uh decides he's going to go buy a seventy thousand dollar uh car well no he's not

no he's not right okay we're not going to do that if you do that then you're off the payroll and you're 100 on your own and we will love you but you will be our stupid child that we love but we're not fun we're not funding squat and you know we're not gonna you know or he decides he's gonna go join a cult or whatever. You know what I'm saying? You're going to extremes. I am not without controlling my ability to continue to put money in this situation. I will stop putting money in this situation. The junior in high school at home, I'm in complete control.

They don't have rights except to not be abused. And Shanna, so much of what they learn going forward as they become adults about money is going to be from you no you already have yeah you've done a great job they're they're looking at how you spend money do you spend more than you can afford how do you guys speak about money in the household how do you guys decide if a purchase is wise or not they're take they're soaking all that up like sponges but once i've laid that hardcore foundation under my decision making paradigm i'll never use it i hope that i was talking about so i'm not suggesting you come in with an iron fist or something i'm not at all and then i'm going to

start the persuasion on the day-to-day the future of what the kid does with $250,000 when he has graduated from college with no debt and has by then $40,000 or $50,000 in his savings account. He's obviously a great kid, but if he decides to do something stupid and he's 24 years old, you have zero power over future decisions. Your only power you have there is persuasion. Yeah. I feel like that's the hardest part is sitting back and letting people just do their. It's the hardest stage of parenting when you have, quote, grown kids, which is an oxymoron. But yeah, when the children you have sire to become adults. Yes.

And so, yeah, and then they get to do what they want to do even if you don't agree with it now i'm blessed in the hour our three have never done anything bizarre outside of our belief system uh that i had to really bite my tongue on but i i don't get to tell them how to parent their children they parent their children yeah and and i honestly in my case i don't even get to advise not unless they ask unless they ask yeah my they ask. Yeah. My parents are the same way. I can set up a situation where they ask. I can ask a lot of questions until they ask. I've been there. And I've had a couple of them at different things. They were doing investments on things, and they would say, hey, dad, would you sit down and be Dave Ramsey and help us with this?

I would be more than honored. Yeah, that's great. Thank you. That's a huge honor. But I can't go in there and answer questions that aren't being asked. Right. And that's great thank you that's a that's a huge honor but i can't go in there and answer questions that aren't being asked right and that's the hardest one so at that point the one of the things that's helped me shana shana in that situation is i have so for the future decisions that they're all in that bucket their decisions as adults they're all in that bucket i uh pretend

like they're my best friend's kids that's good because you can't use your dad's voice on your best friend's kids you can only use influence and it helps me step back and go i'm not in control so i can't use my dad voice it i can i can use it but it won't work because they just laugh it off they go he, ha, ha, ha, he thinks he's in control. He's nothing anymore. True that. So, Shanna. My son did, he turned 18 during COVID and got interested in investing a little bit,

so he started investing in a Roth and a Fidelity money market. Good. So, he's got about $3,600 in his Roth and a little over $8,000 in the money market. What's your plan for these custodial accounts that are going to have substantial funds left in them? I am not sure yet. It's just more for, and I guess my son can already go ahead and get to his. The whole thing? Yep. Wow. It's his um once he's 21 it's his and actually he'll be 21 in july yeah it's his it's his that day um so and you know the great news is is that you don't have any big worries because these kids

both seem very very level-headed and very smart very smart. They're not doing wild and crazy stuff. And that means that you've been working on these values that they're carrying for many years. So great job in parenting. But be prepared for little things as they are out from under your control that you don't agree with but aren't the end of the world. And have the good sense to swallow and just smile and um love them right where they are and they may be they may be doing something

smarter than you they might be doing something dumber than you but you don't control it your only control your only input is influence at that point and as far as teaching them and guiding them, I always teach young kids, little kids, all the way up through 90 years old, all of us kids, there's three things you could do with money. Give it, save it and invest it and enjoy it. And you should always be doing all three. And when in doubt, hard work is an awesome antidote to most problems. And if you can remember those three or four things, you are on your way. If you're four years old or you're 94, you can get through a whole lot of stuff. If you're generous, you're continually investing, and you're having some fun with it. So just be doing all of that and give them the rope length to do all of those things.

Good show today, Jade. Well done. Fun stuff. Well done. Well done, Emily, Ben, James, Zach, Andrew in the booth. Excellent job in there, guys. That puts us our end of the books. We'll be back with you before you know it.

In the meantime, remember, there's ultimately only one way to financial peace, and that's to walk daily with the Prince of Peace, Christ Jesus. Hey, what's up, guys? It's Jade. Look, if you like what you heard in this episode and want to know more about getting started on the Ramsey Baby Steps, go to RamseySolutions.com and click the Get Started button. We'll help you figure out the best next step for you based on your specific situation. That's RamseySolutions.com and click Get Started.